#and to get the roots of the nail cauterized the site needs to be clean but i keep getting proud flesh blobs before we can go through with it
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I fucking hate being long-term temporarily disabled in such a way that you *know* what the treatment is, you are hypothetically able to access the treatment, but you just aren't well enough to have the fucking treatment done.
#vent#hopeful rambling#it's so stupid too#like dang if i had broken my leg or something at least it would feel justified#but no it's a *chronic fucking ingrown toenail and infection*#and to get the roots of the nail cauterized the site needs to be clean but i keep getting proud flesh blobs before we can go through with it#and i need way too much local anaesthetic and i used to be safe for like 3 months but i JUST GOT THEM REMOVED LAST WEEK#and i already have foot/leg issues from being flat footed and walking on my toes as a kid but this has been going on for more than a year#and im worried that the way i have to walk to keep pressure off the toe is making it worse#and im just so so fucking tired of not being able to just walk and do stuff reliably#and even when it doesn't actively hurt i have to be so so conscious because just a little bit of wrong pressure or too much or#i hit something or i leave the bandaids on too long or too little or something#and suddenly it's way way worse#and i've been doing everything right#every time i get prescribed antibiotics i take all of them religiously. i soak my foot i change the bandages i stay off it as much as i can#and it's just never enough. i'm so so tired of hurting for such a stupid reason
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