#and to be clear! i am not blaming any of them for this!

[loz-chainsofcorruption]

And another one if you so desire: J & Four

J: Try me

-

It had started innocently enough.

Wind had been admiring the gem on Hyrule's sword and commented, "I wonder why not all swords have that little, uh, doorknob on the end."

Four's head had slowly rotated towards him.

"The what?"

Wind poked at the rounded end of Hyrule's sword. "Y'know, the doorknob. Yours has one too. Legend's does, Twilight's does, and the Master Sword too, though their doorknobs are more pointy instead of round."

The expression on Four's face was priceless as he sucked in a breath through his nose and let it out slowly. "You mean the pommel?"

"Is that that it's called?" Wind asked. "I didn't know what else to call it - it always kinda reminded me of a doorknob."

Wind had made a simple mistake, so one couldn't fully blame him for what had happened next, seeing as Wild immediately fed into it five minutes later.

"What are your guys' thoughts on sword claw shape?"

"On what?"

"Y'know." Wild pointed to the guard of his sword. "The claw."

"That's the guard!" Four erupted.

The grin on Wild's face had made it clear it had been done on purpose... and in this group, jokes didn't usually die very quickly. The misnomers had ontinued on and off for the next hour.

"I've always liked that dip down the middle of your sword, Wars."

"Fuller," Four muttered, unable to help himself even though it was obvious they were doing it on purpose.

"Thanks, Hyrule. While we're on topic, Four, I've always wondered if you added the wrappings to the handlebar of your sword or if it came with them."

"Grip," Four hissed out, looking almost pained. "It's called a grip. And no, I did not add them."

A blessed break from the blasphemy for only about five more minutes, and then-

"Hey Legend, why is your sword stick golden-"

"Blade!" Four shouted. "It's called a blade and you know it! If any single one of you calls something on a sword - or any weapon - something wrong on purpose one more time I am never mending any of your weapons again!"

"...You wouldn't actually do that, right?" Twilight said nervously.

Four looked dead serious. "Try me."

Wild opened his mouth and Twilight clamped a hand over it.

"Okay. Enough is enough, guys," Time declared. "Leave the smithy alone. And if you really don't know what something is called, ask instead of guessing or making something up."

He did not want to lose the help of their smithy.

[diristine]

HC ASK

hey so I’m feeling emotional today do you got any angst hcs about glass or clef.

Clears throat.

I just got off of work and am tired as hell, you couldnt have chosen a better time for this.

Simon blames himself for his sister’s death and cousin’s disappearance. Its why he cant bring himself to leave the Foundation, he’s convinced if he leaves everyone will disappear and he’ll be alone again.

When Simon became Shard, he continued to mourn his targets no matter how bad they were. In fact, it got to the point he began separating himself from Shard. Shard was the killer, not Simon. Shard was the one who ended those lives, not Simon. Simon has never killed anyone ever!!

He’s borderline suicidal, if it weren’t for promises he’s made to himself he wouldn’t be around. Or at least would have attempted, unfortunately the only people he would worry about when he’s gone is Mr. Mittens and Agent Lucky.

Clef sometimes reality bends on accident during nightmares, to the point he wakes up and his room is flooded with boiling water and he swears he sees thousands of eyes watching him. Those familiar, beautiful, deadly eyes. He doesn’t sleep much anymore.

Humanoid anomalies have their item number tattooed on the back of their neck. Just…think about it.

Clef brought Simon back from the dead sure, but he’s convinced hes tainted the kid. He hates himself for tainting Simon, turning him into the plaything he used to be. But…he can’t bring himself to let Simon return to his corpse state. If it wasn’t for Clef, Simon’s soul wouldn’t be in that body of his.

Simon’s family thinks hes legally dead, sometimes he visits the family gravesite and leaves flowers at Skylar’s grave as he looks at his own headstone. He has no home to return to. He hates it.

People tend to forget Simon’s birthday, or existence. Especially at work, sometimes if theres no evaluations scheduled that week, he only sees agent Lucky. He’s never felt so alone. So if they forget his birthday? He just…makes sure to remember everyone else’s.

Clef was/still is experimented on. What can he say? No? Theyll just threaten him with Meri and Simon. Don’t ask about his scars.

Simon can’t get therapy, the O5s wont let him. So he copes with other means, even if he would tell his patients to do more healthy things. It never applies to him. Ever.

Sometimes Clef grows antlers. He hates them.

[fruitless-vain]

Oh boy, oh oh oh boy.

You are actually not going to believe the fact that /I/ had to convince Jack to take a step back and breathe before making any rash decisions.

So where do we start here. Uh.

Hmm

So BIL is jacks supervisor at work, he lives with MIL typically. He thought it was appropriate to confront her right before her shift starts. He decided to berate her, tell her she was picking me over them (she literally was doing the opposite), blame her for everything that’s ever gone wrong in their family, and then proceed to say that she *did not care about him having heart surgery* (for context her grandfather suddenly died and his funeral was back in BC (we are in MB) the exact day of his surgery, she had asked him if he was comfortable with her [and MIL!] going or if he wanted their support, he said he was fine with it. I ended up being the one caring for him, taking him to surgery, and doing all the post op care)

He then followed through by saying some delightfully choice words about me, comparing me to Jamie (the ex that forced Jack to isolate from her family) and so on.

He brought the death of their dad in to it (she was very much like dads princess sort of relationship, very tight knit, he is irreplaceably important to her, he was run over by a train as a pedestrian. It was a sudden and unexpected, brutal death) I don’t recall the specifics of what was said but it was damaging.

Her and BIL have been tight for life, they have their fights but they’ve been through hell and back together forever. Nothing could really break their bond as far as I have ever known.

He said that both he and MIL agree on everything he’s said. He pit them both against her and tried to pit her against me.

What was said/ done was so severe that I picked Jack up from work, dead silent. I ask if she’s okay, and she broke down. I had to find a parking lot to pull over to console her and talk out what just happened to her (god knows our house is not a safe space for this right now). All I did was listen and comfort, I said next to nothing.

She wants to cut them both out, change her cellphone plan, delete the Netflix, and cease contact completely. She wanted to come home and kick MIL to curb but I did chime in here and say we should at least wait until morning, let the feelings settle, think things through and then decide what the best course of action is.

All of this, falling apart, because of offering MIL a place to stay during a crisis. All of this because MIL couldn’t be a respectful houseguest for two weeks. All of this. Destroyed. For past traumas they can’t let go of. All of this? Shoving her away in the name of what? Being afraid that I’m taking her away?

There’s so much more to say here, so much more to defend and argue. But all I’m left with here is bewilderment.

If she does go through with this I’m going to be in for a world of damage, I will 100% be blamed for her making this decision - to be clear I am totally okay with that. We know the truth and don’t need to justify it to comfort them. I back my wife with whatever choice she makes here. But things will definitely get rough.

[edennill]

@silmarillionepistolary 2025 #2

[For anyone who has read the first chapter when it was first posted – you might remember that it strongly implied Gondolin was already in existence at this point. Timeline-wise, however, Turgon should still be in Nevrast and the work has been edited to reflect this. I apologise for any confusion. Also somehow, I managed to miswrite the title originally, I have no idea how.]

Fingon to Turgon, private missive, Quenya:

Turno, please tell me, how do you woo a lady? How do you woo a lady if you really aren't sure what to do and whether it would be suitable for you to wed anytime soon?

F.

___

Turgon to Fingon:

For questions on how to progress through courtship at an infinitesimal pace, I would suggest addressing Findaráto.

Also, Elenwë did not – does not compare to – anyone. What wisdom I have on these matters does not apply to whatever you have gotten yourself into.

___

Fingon to Turgon:

I apologize if my letter brought back bad memories.

___

Fingon to Turgon:

Are you in any way hurt or offended by what I wrote? I'm truly sorry.

___

Turgon to Fingon:

Not ‘bad memories’. An old sorrow.

I'm not offended. Itarillë broke her wrist and continually demands her already otherwise engaged father assist her. I have had little time to write.

T.

P.S: the smudges are Itarillë’s doing. She insisted on sending you a kiss.

___

Fingon to Fingolfin, private, semi-formal missive:

My Lord and Father,

In matters of the heart, what is there to be said of royal duty? In matters of moral duty, what might be said of the heart?

I am taking the liberty to assume you have not yet received the following information from other quarters, and please forgive me for not having addressed you earlier. Rest assured that only three or four others know so far. I have said nothing even to my sister, under the assumption that it would be better for this not to reach Turkafinwë and Curufinwë at this juncture.

If a child of yours were to feel stirred in particular wise towards a – Sinda, what would you advise – both as my father and as the King of our people? There are certainly grave matters in the way of such a liaison and I should not blame you if you demand that out of propriety and responsibility for his people and for the wrongs that he himself has brought upon them, you son should cleave away from it entirely. And yet, would it not at the same time be an advantageous show of goodwill towards the Grey Elves? Can a hypothetical union be entered into in good will if one of the sides of such an agreement holds an unrevealed matter in their heart such as the one you know of?

If I am to proceed, I would like at least a hint of your blessing; if I am to abandon all thoughts of love, I deserve your clear and explicit judgement on the matter.

In sincere love and reverence,

Findekáno Kanyalintë your son, Lord of Lóminórë and Crown Prince of the Noldor

___

Fingolfin to Fingon, Quenya:

Findekáno,

Expect my arrival early in the next week. No ceremony is necessary, but I wish to speak of this with you face to face.

And I beg of you! In the future do not send such messages through Sindarin couriers! Both treason and fear of treason we ought to be wary of.

Your father, High King Nolofinwë etc.

___

Fingon to Fingolfin, private message, Quenya:

Dear father,

If we are to fear the fear of treason then by very inference we cannot fear treason itself. And – I do not know who would reveal this knowledge for mere spite. Surely no one could gain from such a thing, save Morgoth maybe. But I understand what you mean and shall comply.

Findekáno

___

Fingon to Meril of the Mithrim, semi-formal missive, dated on the day after Fingon’s first message to his father. Sindarin:

The blessings of the Valar upon the Lady Meril of the Northern Sindar,

It is with great joy that I look back upon our conversations when we last met, and I hope that they will be but the first of many, and a portent of like friendship between our closely kindred peoples. Surely, your very presence ought to quell any such doubts on whether the Mithrim can be worthy comrades to the Noldor newly-arrived as have been present at whiles, your bearing being if anything – superior to some of my own kin.

In token of friendship, I would ask if there is aught that your people have desire of that we might bestow? Great assistance you have already rendered to us in many matters; this must be returned more than in kind, and if you would but assist me in determining – but only if it suits you, Lady Meril. I demand nothing. I ask only for – friendship.

In honour and esteem,

Fingon, Lord of Dor-Lómin

Silmarillion Epistolary Week 2025 #1

here's to the mess we make

ao3 link

Fingon to Maedhros, private correspondence, in Quenya:

Nelyo, Russandol, dearest and most beloved friend and cousin, or however it is you wish to be called these days:

My father is well, the weather is mild and fair at this time of year, no stray orcs since my last letter, and so, and so on. If you have anything more worth the effort of writing down to in that vein, please feel free to share – by which I mean, what new insult against law and love have you prevented T&C from committing recently? And the twins’ falconry project – have you already found the one you promised to me? (Which you did, I remind you) But lest you think me a poor correspondent, I do indeed have a weightier matter to describe – of which, in fact, you will be the first to hear.

Russo, I do believe I am in love.

She is a Sinda of Mithrim, named after the rose, and indeed as fair, though I will not attempt to do her (or indeed any other; I am no poet to describe charm or grace) justice for fear of making a fool of myself. But her hair is that rare silver, not so pale, but dark and yet still shining, and she wears her braids longer than Artanis.

But oh – how you would believe her to be of the house of Finwë by the way she carries herself! It is as if – as if all the other Sindar I have met in this land were looking down at the ground, and she was the first to look me in the eye. Not literally, of course, though she is tall for her people, but I cannot describe it to you better.

I want to see a crown of adamant upon those braids. She deserves to be part of this House – it is as if by a mistake of the tides of the world that she is not. I would rectify it.

Russandol, Russandol – how can I make you understand what I am speaking about – without having seen her, without having my heart within your chest. I love you, I love you; I am drunk on the world – and very foolish. I do not know whether she would ever return my affection – but I doubt she would be more likely to if she knew how silly I'm being, would she?

Russandol, forget the above and give me some advice! The political workings of such an issue would have to be tumultuous, would they not?

Lovingly, your Finno

___

Maedhros to Fingon, private correspondence, in Quenya:

Dear Finno,

Should I reply to your desire for more concrete news in the same way as you have served me? No new outrage has happened in Himlad, thank you for asking. As for the falcons – ask the twins. They have told me nothing.

Some dunce set fire to the bathhouse by the city wall (accidentally, I presume – or at least hope). I have been doing my best to stop the entirely ridiculous rumour going around that it was the deed of a thrall, because yes, Morgoth certainly would set his sights on a bathhouse and at the hour when it's most empty, would he not? On such days as these, I hate the Noldor, I hate the Sindar, and I hate Middle Earth. You forbid me to joke about my own life and death, which I comply with, note, only because I owe it to you, so I will refrain from saying what else I hate. Either way, this is mostly in jest, I have had coffee and broken fast, and hardly feel as irritated as I was a while ago, but it bore saying.

Without further ado – regarding the heavy matter you dropped on me so suddenly – I am flattered that I am the first person you share this with (although, I wonder – have you spoken with anyone else by the time you are reading this? I might refrain from making it widely known if I were you)... but Finno. Finno. Have you – you must have – thought of the consequences of this in conjunction with certain deeds of the past? To wit, your untimely intervention in Alqualondë, curse myself and my house for bringing this upon you.

I am afraid you are in an unresolvable quandary on which I have little advice to give. There is nothing I would counsel you against more strictly than entering a holy and permanent relationship with a member of the third clan while concealing this matter, though. And yet you cannot think of telling her, I assume. Please tell me you do not. If our presence in this land is to be fruitful and untroubled, there can be no risk of the particulars leaking out. Nor do I think that the knowledge of this would make the lady look upon you favourably, I'm afraid.

I do not know if joining the House is a blessing I would wish upon one I loved.

It is a heavy matter and I feel loath to counsel you on that which I have never known – but if you still may, would it not be wiser to forget about her?

Do not do anything reckless.

Russandol

___

Finrod to Fingon, private note, Quenya:

I cannot believe you have fallen in love because you found someone just as haughty as you are.

On a more serious note, you do realise, I hope, how a secret might prove an obstacle in these conditions?

[Initials which can be made out with some difficulty from under several layers of flourishes and a snake monogram:] F.I.

[shima-draws]

Shima is it Coralaw 👀👀👀

...................MAYBE

[snaggletoothedbastard]

The Invisible Child

There’s a bell I wear round my neck and when it rings silver I taste copper because no-one else can hear it.  I follow my brothers through the streets,  a walking stick and a pair of ear-defenders with a ghostly body, a forgotten face,  a translucent throat full of screams I keep behind my teeth because

I don’t want to kill your vibe, man.  I don’t want to ruin your night. 

I’m watching everyone and everyone’s laughing and their voices stab me through the ears and stir my brain like a soup. I don’t think the mushrooms are part of the soup, I think it’s going mouldy in there.  If I bang my head against a wall enough times, will the overgrowth fall out of my eyes? It’s worth a try. 

The pain in the back of my head is cold and the eyes that follow me as this scream finally escapes are even colder.  Now they see me, for a split second.  And now they don’t.  They walk away and leave me to play hopscotch by myself;  I’ve been flung back to square one. 

I don’t even know how to play hopscotch. 

I bite at the hand that feeds me, the hand that holds me, the hand that guides me,  the hand that disappears and becomes invisible and I taste copper again because I’m tearing up my throat shouting for help and no-one wants to hear me.

[grinchwrapsupreme]

i'm watching season 8 of dexter for the first time and i'm only on episode 2 but i'm glad they're finally tackling the whole "dexter is a psychopath and psychopaths don't have empathy" thing by acknowledging that this dude does in fact have empathy i hope to god they come to the logical conclusion

[mothmans-cumrag]

Imagine turning 21 the week your three best friends are sick. Couldn't be me

[thestripiestshirts]

Back when I was majoring in elementary education we had to do these presentations of lesson plans in which people went up and gave a lesson as if the rest of us were the elementary students they were teaching. This one guy's lesson was about the phases of the moon, and he very confidently did his whole lesson... explaining to us that the moon's phases were caused by the shadow of the Earth on the moon. At some point I finally couldn't take it anymore and raised my hand to explain that that's not how the phases of the moon were caused. I forget the presenter's response to this, but good number of people in the class got annoyed with me for "ruining it."

I used to be a grader and an occasional substitute prof for an introductory astronomy lab. That means that the majority of the people in this lab are only taking it because it’s a requirement and about half of them think it’s an astrology class.

I was grading midterms and this one girl. She was so nice and I think she was a business major. Fuck. The question on the midterm was to draw a diagram of the solar system and this poor girl. This fucking girl had drawn a Mars-centric solar system. As in every planet and the sun were orbiting Mars. I now actually have a custom Cards Againsy Humanity card I got at a con that says “A Mars-centric solar system”

I had a boy argue with me that there was liquid water on the moon (this was around when they had found liquid water on Mars in ~2015) and he wouldn’t believe me that he likely meant Mars and not the moon. After I marked his answer to the relevant lab question wrong, he took it to the department head who had promptly laughed him out of the office.

And there was another boy who, during a lab in our observatory where we would look at certain things in the sky, asked where the sun was. At 10pm in November. After some questioning it was revealed that he thought the moon and the sun were the same thing.

[arolesbianism]

Remembers Tali exists and starts wailing and crying

[mtx-lol]

got reminded of a years old problem that wordlessly shifted an already distant relationship with a parents friends child into absolute nothing, drawing sesh ruined

[cats-in-the-clouds]

my sister got engaged and we’re all really happy for her but my bitter rain cloud of a dad (who naturally she told last) is giving her a bit of passive aggressive grief about it despite her boyfriend being like the best man of our generation (presumably either because he’s not catholic or because my dad sees them as young dumb unemployed people who aren’t ready for marriage or because he’s mad he barely has any real love with his own wife or something). so like pray for us? i wish i knew what to do

[thedarkestrivernymph]

Soft yan clan leader has me soo🫠 imagine the horror if he were to argue with his beloved wife or try to deny her something and she looks like she's about to cry or the grovel if he pissed her off and she ignored him ahhh i neeeed himmm

Oh my... the ideas in my head... 😶‍🌫️

Soft Yandere! Clan Leader x Wife! Reader

warnings(?): slight angst, very cheesy/romantic, emotions

note: it's written from his perspective:)

"I refuse." his tone was strict, reminiscent of a dull dagger that someone forgot to sharpen. That's what you did to him; you took his bite away.

Sighing he massaged his temples.

"I don't want my wife roaming around the streets ever again without my explicit knowledge." his fingers curled until his knuckles whitened.

"Do you have any idea of the sheer number of ill-intending people out on streets at nighttime? My love what if danger befell you while I wasn't there to shield you? What if some sick bastard—."

"Husband. Did I hurt you so?" your bottom lip trembled, shame glistened in the corners of your eyes; those beautiful eyes that he wanted to bind with silk so that no one else could admire them.

"My love I just worry—"

"I didn't want to cause you to worry." now you started sniffling and he could audibly hear his heart shatter. "I just missed my hometown so much and— I forgot myself. I am sorry." you muttered. He could detect the insecurity creep into your wavering tone; he was losing you again to the demons in your pretty head.

"I won't ever cause you trouble again, husband."

"My love that isn't what I—"

"Goodnight." you spun on your heel, adamant on slipping through his fingers like sand before he could even raise his voice in protest, demanding you to stay. If you just knew that he didn't blame you for getting carried away by the memories of your childhood, longing for a time much more innocent nor that he found you troublesome—he only wanted you safe and snug under his wing, why couldn't you understand?

But he wouldn't have that. No more. He would never tire of chasing you—but he couldn't bear the sight of your backside any longer.

"Love," his breath tickled the shell of your ear, on hand splayed across your waist, the other wrapped around your jaw, "don't run away. At least not today. I apologise, so much, for your husband's inability to make you understand just how much he loves you."

He sighed again, pressing a kiss to your earlobe, over the dangling diamond that had once belonged to his mother.

"Please don't think you're troubling me. I only worry because wherever you go you take my soul with you. And a man can't survive without that, now can he?" he drew you further in, engulfed you in his embrace, letting the darkness of the night be the only observer of the intimacy between the two of you.

"My love." he breathed.

"My love," he repeated,"I love you, please stop believing otherwise. I beg you of you. Please love me too." there was clear frustration in his tone, silent suffering that would only rarely slip through the cracks of his usual mask yet with you; he discarded that very facade alltogether.

The room was cloaked in darkness like so many other nights, yet this night felt colder, icy even. He was desperate to reach through to you. Slowly, the words he would always spit out felt repetitive; too artificial for his liking and he feared you would perhaps never believe in them.

"My love please—"

You kissed him.

He had searched for heaven before he met you, but now he found it between your lips. In the way you hugged him not with your arms but with your mouth, glossy gaze a split open, gazing at him as if you had finally, finally, accepted the truth.

It was mind-numbingly sweet; it didn't last very long, your tongue only shyly prodded at his bottom lip before you tried fleeting back like a startled deer, eyes everywhere but on him. Still, he held you in his arms refusing to let you escape—because now that he finally had a taste of heaven, he would never let you out of his embrace.

"I love you." he uttered. And now, even as you didn't reply, only looking away bashfully in the way he found so cute he could pinch your cheeks, he knew that he had finally succeeded.

He had captured your heart—the soul of his heaven, his sacramentum, his moon.

You were his.

[kingkonoha]

彡𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐒𝐏𝐀𝐂𝐄 || 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐔 𝐆.

“Are you still mad at me?”

“Of course I am. And do you wanna know a bad habit of yours?”

“Hm?” Satoru’s gentle breath hit the back of your neck as the tall man stood behind you, staring down at the lettuce and tomatoes that you were chopping up on a cutting board. “A bad habit? Didn’t think I had any.”

You rolled your eyes and said, “You have a few. One of them being that you don’t believe in personal space. I mean, it’s kinda crazy that you can keep anything and everything from touching you, yet you act like you’ll die if you’re more than ten feet away from me.”

“I don’t see the problem, sweetheart.”

“That nickname. That nickname is part of the problem right there. I’m not your sweetheart. We’re just friends as far as I’m concerned, so, yeah, it pisses me off a little when we’re in public together and someone approaches me, and you start hovering around me and holding my hand like we’re dating when we’re not.”

As your sharp knife sliced through the vegetable — a particularly frustrated slice as well, as Satoru saw you grip the knife even harder and apply more unnecessary force — Satoru stepped closer, pressing his body against your backside, and thus, pushing you against the kitchen island.

“Is that really a problem?” He whispered. “Can you blame me for wanting to be close to you all the time? You’re just so . . .”

He couldn’t finish speaking. Not when he was completely overwhelmed by the way your body felt against his, and your sweet scent nearly drove him crazy — he no longer wanted dinner. He had an appetite for something else now.

“You can cook later,” Satoru reached around you and grabbed the knife out of your hands, placed it on the wooden cutting board, and slid all of it away.

Then, he placed his hands on your hips.

“And I think you and I both know that we’re more than friends,” Satoru said. “You’re mine.”

“Well, you’ve never made that clear,” you mumbled, and while your words were spoken just slightly above a whisper, it was enough for Satoru to lean you over across the kitchen island and press his clothed dick against your ass.

Even through the material of his pants and your skirt, you could feel his need; his cock was hard enough to make you gasp when you felt it.

“I’m sorry,” Satoru smirked slightly. “I’ll make it clear to you right now, I promise.”

His long fingers lifted your skirt and hooked around your underwear, pulling them down until they were left to dangle around your knees.

He ran his large hands across your ass. Across the back of your thighs. Across your back. Any place he could touch.

Lowering his head, he finally dove in like a starving man, eating you out sloppily from behind as you were left to do nothing but moan his name and grip the edges of the kitchen island.

His tongue repeatedly licked at your clit. He moaned at the sweet taste of it, and as he so desperately wanted to suck on your little button for hours upon hours and taste your cum all over his tongue, it was no surprise to know why he never believed in personal space. You were just that irresistible.

🏷️: @sad-darksoul @priv-rose @yihona-san06 @keriaonmarz @luvvmae @underworldsheiress @notgoodforlife @levisfavoriteteashop @insomniacbehaivour @preciousamethyst @kxmorrx @iwanttohitmyself @ellaumbrella1 @shoyosdoll @lil-apple-pie @prettypixigrl @sonarspace @averysmolbear @starstoru @starlightanyaaa @dolphin1135

[clockwayswrites]

An abundance of birbs part 33

Masterpost Please no editing or concrit, I know I have missing or swapped words, but I am super fuzzy from this headache. It will get a good edit before ao3. <3

“I’m hiding in here from your children,” Danny said as he came into Bruce’s study. He had a tray of tea and snacks in hand, so he must have been sent up by Alfred.

“That’s more than fair, considering,” Bruce said with a little smile.

Danny just sighed as he set the tray down. “You have video, don’t you.”

Bruce nodded. “Jason sent one and Tim the other. They’re very moving.”

“Yes, Jerry’s love for me is eternal, clearly,” Danny drolled.

“If only Jerry’s father would approve of the union,” Bruce said.

Danny gave a little hum as he poured the tea. “Alas, Damian does seem very resistant to the idea, if the lecture he gave Jerry is any indication. Cream, sugar?”

“A little cream, thank you,” Bruce said and got up from his desk. “And Jerry was being very forward so the lecture may be a little deserved, but who can blame him with those wings.”

“Mister Wayne,” Danny said with an exaggerated gasp, “are you you saying that you’re enamored with my wings?”

Bruce reached out and brushed his fingertips through Danny’s wings. He could play it all off, of course. It could just be part of the rest of their banter. But did he want to? He’s enjoyed having Danny around. The man seemed to just fit with the family. Overall, the children certainly seemed to like him. And, well, Bruce found that he quite liked Danny too. Maybe it was time to take a little risk.

“Yes,” Bruce said. “Though the wings are hardly the only thing about you that I’m enamored with.”

Danny blushed so quickly that Bruce was honestly a little concerned bout Danny’s blood pressure. “I—um, oh?”

“Is it that surprising? You’re kind, intelligent, considerate. You protected my children and even before that were gentle and understanding with them. You have a sense of humor and seem able to handle just about anything,” Bruce said, which was almost an understatement with what Danny has been through lately. “And, more shallowly, you’re very attractive, with or without the wings.”

“That—I—oh come on, you of all people can say someone else is attractive!” Danny sputtered.

“Oh?”

“Have you not looked in a mirror recently? You’re the type of person that ‘devastatingly handsome’ was coined for,” Danny said with a gesture at Bruce. “Which is something that I just said out loud. I don’t suppose you want to fire me so that I can run away to a remote island somewhere?”

Bruce chuckled. “Fortunately, I don’t have that sort of power over your job. All that would fall to Lucius.”

“Fortunately?” Danny repeated.

“Umhum. It means that there’s no company policy we’re breaking if we were to date. And there’s no pressure for you to say yes if you’re opposed to the idea,” Bruce said. He very much wanted to make that clear. “And between the press, my reputation, the large family, and the recent rogue attack I know there are a number of reasons to be opposed to the idea.”

“Bruce,” Danny said before Bruce could continue, “are you trying to talk me into dating you or out of it?”

“I well…” Bruce cleared his throat. “I don’t want to assume anything or imply that I am some sort of catch because I hardly am. I am a stubborn man. I have… a rather deep seated anxiety that verges on paranoia at times. It has and can make me overbearing when I try to protect the people I care about. I come with six children, almost as many pseudo children, and a frankly terrifyingly competent butler who is like a father to me. Every relationship I’m in and not actually in ends up in the paper—”

The spiral of words—of reasons he wasn’t good enough for someone like Danny was cut short as Danny pushed himself up on his tiptoes and across the coffee table to press his lips to Bruce’s. Bruce sighed softly into the kiss as it put sudden stop to the unwanted thoughts. Danny left his hand on Bruce’s cheek as he pulled back a little.

“Too forward?” Danny asked. His words and eyes alike were filled with nerves.

“Not at all,” Bruce said quickly. He followed his words up with a quick kiss as proof. “I am sorry about rambling like that. As I said, deeply anxious.”

“Anxious is okay. You’re aware of it. I’m not exactly a paragon of mental health either. I’ve been going to therapy since I was eighteen,” Danny said. His thumb gently stroked Bruce’s cheek. “First off, fuck the press. I can deal with it. Second off, your family is huge and wonderful and not at all something that would stop me, not unless they hated me.”

“They certainly do not hate you,” Bruce assured him.

“Third off,” Danny continued with a little smile, “I guess the anxiety, which we’ve covered. And fourth off, I am also very stubborn and have no problem telling someone to budge off if they’re being too much. So, yeah, we might have lines to find out and some of those we’d find out be crossing them and fucking up, but that’s just part of dating, isn’t it? If any of them become lines that we can’t deal with, well, we’re old enough that I would hope that we could end things maturely.”

“I have a very good track record of remaining friends with my exes, for better or worse,” Bruce said.

“Better or worse?”

“Harvey Dent, as one example.”

“Ah,” Danny said with a little nod. “I’ve heard that he’s been doing better at least?”

“That or he’s planning something big,” Bruce said with a sigh. “But I even I know I should stop talking about an ex with someone that just kissed me.”

“Generally a good rule,” Danny agreed with a little smile. “Does this mean that we’re going to try dating?”

“If I didn’t talk you out of it,” Bruce joked.

“Like I said, I’m stubborn,” Danny pointed out. “But as much as I adore them, I expect at least one dinner out with no children once my wings are gone.”

“Deal,” Bruce agreed easily and leaned down to give Danny a proper kiss.

---

AN:

I didn't plan for the kiss to happen here, but I'll take it!

[nkogneatho]

SANTA'S CUMMING TO TOWN

—fushiguro toji x fem!reader

#TAPE NO 1 OF 'Tis the Season to be Naughty

—cw: breeding, santa kink (idk bruh i am all high and horny), mention on pregnancy, prone bone, raw sex, spanking, dirty talking, nick names. (art creds: yy6241 on ig)

—a/n: 1.2k words of everything that is wrong with me

Christmas wasn't particularly the most awaited time of the year for Toji. You on the other hand? You made sure that your place looked like the Christmas Spirit threw up garlands, trees and cute lights all over.

"Can you pass me those lights?" you ask Toji who was hanging the pinecones on the tree.

"Tell me why we're doin' this again?"

"Because it's Christmas. It's the season of joy. Oh, by the way," you gently step down from the table that helped you a gain a foot to put on the decorations, "gumi's friends are coming tomorrow so make sure to dress up as a santa."

"What?" He is stunned. It's not that he doesn't like kids but to have all their excited eyes on him would give him quite the stage fright.

"Please Please Toji. I know you don't like this kinda stuff but gumi was so excited the other day to see santa."

"What's in it for me?"

"You want a bribe for dressing up to make your son happy?" Your arms fold against your chest and you look at him with a poker face.

"Of course. That little brat gets spoiled way too much by you. When's my turn?"

"Toji. It's either the santa costume or the shark costume and dancing on baby shark for an hour"

*GASP*

"Hope ya know Santa doesn't like you, sweetheart." He walks away after giving you a nasty look. You know he doesn't mean it. He is cute when he is all pouty.

The party felt like forever. You send Megumi off to Shiu's place with his son and his mom. They were gonna have a sleepover. Megumi was a raging introvert just like his father so him having a best friend was a big deal for you.

"So the dishes are done. The extra party hats are in the cupboard, the floor is clean and y—" You stop your moving feet and look at the view in front of you. "And Santa hasn't left yet."

"Well...I still have one bad girl on my list. Thought I'd take care of that." He steps closer. The heat emitting from his body already reaching to hug your skin.

"But I've been your good girl, haven't I?" your doe eyes flutter at him, your fingers curling his white faux beard.

"Nah sweetheart. You've been so bad. You've barely paid any attention to me all month. Don'tcha think ya should get punished for that?" His grainy voice grazes against your neck. You try so hard to come up with a quick witty answer to turn this into a wholesome conversation but that was down the drain the moment he put that thing on. You were never into the whole santa thing until now. All blame goes to the man underneath the costume.

"P-punished?" You clear you throat. "Like?" You wait for an answer but you don't get one. Well, at least not in words.

Toji picks you up bridal style and walks to the cozy mattress next to the christmas tree and the gifts.

"Gonna give you a full experience, doll."

Everytime you fuck, Toji's always the one to get undressed first. He is too impatient to feel you against him. But tonight, you're the only one getting undressed. Your dress pools on your stomach as calloused hands hike it up.

"Toj—"

"tsk tsk. address me properly, naughty girl."

"Santa! Need you inside me.

"Heh. Not so soon, darling. Gotta punish you first." In a split second, you're turned on your belly, face pushed against the pillow. Toji inhales a sharp breath watching your exposed ass. A quick spank is landed on your them, making your husband hard as your plump skin bounces.

"Look at'cha. Such a slut. getting all wet with just a spank? what you gon' do when santa fills up your hole, doll?"

*spank*

"Ah! Fuck. I am so sorry, Santa. I promise I'll be a good girl f'you" you mewl.

"Promise? ight. Let's test that." You hear him shuffle. His fingers unbuckle the comically large belt and tugging down the pants just enough to expose his throbbing cock. He pumps it a few times before slapping the precum covered tip on your butt cheeks, the slight wet feeling on your skin turning you on even more. Toji grabs a cushion and settles it between the floor and your stomach so your pussy is easily visible. It's shameful. You know you're so wet that it's traveling down your thigh and drenching the cushion.

You feel his cockhead rub against your slick, opening the folds.

"Shit. She's dripping, sweetheart. Don't even need to stretch ya tonight. You ready for Santa's cock?"

He doesn't even give you a chance to answer before he is slowly forcing it in your pussy. Emerald eyes not even blinking for a second out of fear of missing even a single frame of the way you swallow him.

"Fuuuuuck!" you cry out at the stretch.

"Attagirl. Took it all in once. Keep it up and I might take you off my bad list, baby."

He starts off a few gentle strokes to get you used to it all before he puts his arms on your back, pushing you further against the mattress as he starts pounding into you like an animal.

"Fuckfuckfuck fucking god! I love your pussy. You feel so fucking good. Ughhh"

"Ah! Ah! Ah! Santa, pl—please. You're so big."

"I know, baby. But—ugh—you're takin' me sooo well. Fuck! Yeah, baby c'mon. Grind that ass on my cock. Yeaaaah just like that fuck!"

"G-gunna cum, anh anh ffu—ngh," you cry and your tears are soaked by the pillows. In another second, you're coming undone on his cock, screaming his name.

"Good girl. Good. Fucking. Girl." Each word enunciated with a deep plunge in your shivering pussy.

"You've been such a good girl. Santa's gonna give you a gift." Toji picks up his pace again, rolling his hips faster, the faux beard chafing your shoulders as he is putting all his weight on you, all his instincts telling him to breed you.

"Gunna give my sweet doll the greatest gift. You better take it all. 'm gonna make sure your pussy does. goddaaaamn nghh—" A few more deep thrusts and soon he is losing his composure, cumming and painting your insides with his thick leak.

"You better return the gift in nine months doll." You're too fucked in your brain to even register what he said.

The next morning you're not even making eye contact with Toji, too embarrassed to accept you were turned on by something so innocent. Good thing Megumi comes by the door running, helping you avoid the situation for a little longer.

"Aww come here, my boy. Did you have fun at Uncle Shiu's?" He nods. His little arms coming to hug you.

"So what gift ya got brat?" Toji asks the little sea urchin.

"I got a pink tiger with a red color bow. He is the best. I named him Yuuji." You chuckle, wiping the drool from corner of his lips. "And we ate fortune cookies."

"ohh! what did your cookie say?"

"It said Santa will bring a little sister next year." Blood rushes to your cheeks, your face heating up at the little boy's innocent comment, sounding completely sinful after scenes from last night play in your head. You bite the insides of your cheek.

"Mhm. Hope he does, babe." He kisses the top of the boy's head and then your temple. Yeah he is not the Christmas kinda guy. But this might be his new favorite holiday now.