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[damn-stark]

Chapter 9 Cheers to a New Year

Chapter 9 of Tragedy at the Miller’s

A/N- OMG WELCOME BACK EVERYONE!! thank you for coming back and welcome new readers! I hope you like the chapter!

Warning- FLUFF, some angst, light violence, talks of death, alcohol, spoilers for season 2, Remember this is a rewrite not an AU, so the major stuff that happens in the show will happen here :)

Pairing- Joel Miller x daughter!reader (platonic of course :), OC x Fem!reader

Episode- 2x01

(If you want to be tagged let me know!)

————

*A FEW MONTHS AFTER SALT LAKE CITY INCIDENT*

The summer breeze runs coldly past your face, wiping away the thick beads of sweat that roll down your forehead. The thundering hoofsteps on the dry ground mix perfectly with the pounding of your heartbeat only drumming harder and harder the closer your horse gets to your destination.

A part of you wants to slow down or come to a stop, but when you look back, the hard cold breeze steals the gasp that escapes past your lips when you notice how close she is, threatening to catch up to you. Thus you immediately nudge your horse to quicken her speed, creating a cloud of dust that blocks her view of you and leaves her clueless and nervous as to how far you'll get.

There comes a moment where she thinks she lost you, there’s too much blocking her view, so she grows intensely more nervous because she knows she’ll never live it down. She’ll be ruined if you reach your destination, and she can’t allow that. You need to lose. Yet when her horse jumps over a fallen tree she finally sees you again, sun beaming down at you as if it was made for you, calm lake water glimmering behind you and basking your figure in an almost ethereal light, and a cruel winning grin decorating your face as you gloat your victory.

“I win!” You cheer. “I win!”

You jump off your horse to let her hydrate herself and proceed to jump up and down to only rub it in Ellie’s face harder that you are indeed the winner and she is the loser. Even if Ellie makes her horse slow down now that she sees that you won, you continue to gloat and be just as enthralled that you won. Even more so when you see the pout on her loser face.

“What?!” You exclaim proudly. “What?!”

Ellie finally reaches you and hesitates climbing off her horse because she doesn’t want to admit defeat, but her horse mirrors yours by drinking water, so she has no choice but to get off and see you gloat like a crazed fanboy.

“I won! I won!”

Ellie rolls her eyes and you hop over to her to throw your arm around her shoulders and yank her against your side to jump up and down with her.

“Whatever,” Ellie grumbles as she crosses her arms over her chest. “Your horse is older, mine is still young.”

You stop jumping and push your face close to hers. “Don't be a sore loser. Admit, I’m better than you.”

“You've been on horseback longer than me.”

You mock her moving mouth with your hand and taunt her further. “All I hear is excuses. I won fair and square. I am victorious.” You grin and press her harder against you finally causing her to shove you aside to sulk in her defeat.

“Don’t you have something better to do?” She snaps back and you take a deep breath to finally try and calm yourself down.

“No. We finished patrol and archery lessons. Now I’m all yours,” you explain kindly, missing the fact that she’s still seething.

“Until the evening,” you add as you remember your other duties. “I have some writing to do for Phantom of the Opera, and then I have to plan sets…why don’t you come with me? You have an artistic mind. I could use your help…and maybe you’ll meet someone…” you trail off and look at her hopefully, but she looks annoyed at your suggestion.

“My friends and I enjoy having you around, but I want you to have friends of your own. People you can confide in like I confide in mine,” you add since she stood quiet. “I know someone who will actually go to the theater today and I think you’ll like her. Her name is Kat. So come? Help?”

Ellie sighs and turns around to slowly approach her horse, so you draw out a deep breath, calming your once racing heart before you slowly mirror her actions but by sticking to your horse.

“Yeah, maybe,” she entertains you but you can’t tell if she’s being serious or not. It’s always hard to tell with her, so you’ll have to double-check with her later and hope she is being serious. You’ve seen her struggle for a while now to come out of the house. Your dad says it’s normal, that it takes a while to get used to being in a community again, but you think that besides that she’s still really struggling with what happened with the Fireflies.

It took so much from her, but you don’t want to touch the subject because one, you just feel too guilty and heartbroken, and two, what can be done about it? Your dad made sure that any kind of hope died in that hospital that day.

“I am willing to go all or nothing back home,” you try to cheer her up as you see that the smugness she once carried is slowly dwindling and getting replaced by that solemnity that usually takes place in her features.

“How about it?” You press and keep your eyes on her as she looks at the peaceful horizon.

“Can I…hm…can I ask you something?” She struggles to ask, making you lose every ounce of pride and excitement.

“Uh—”

“You have to be honest,” she cuts you off without knowing and snaps her head toward you to look at you across the lake with eyes full of loud vulnerability, letting you know that she’s putting all her trust in you with whatever she’s going to ask.

“Okay,” you say loud enough so she can hear, and nod faintly.

Ellie turns away to hit her fist against the palm of her hand and gather what she needs to ask you, while you continue to keep your eyes on her like a person afraid she’ll somehow vanish into that river, feeling your heart pick up again only this time it's not out of excitement and adrenaline to win and gloat. This time your heart begins to pound out of fear, and you feel every breath grow ragged.

“I know,” you barely hear Ellie say as she keeps her back turned to you. “I know you said that you and Joel were apart the day we were all at the hospital,” she continues and finally turns to face you with confusion more than anything else, making your heartache along with jump.

“But you were still there. You still know what happened…so tell me that everything Joel said is true,” she almost pleads with her eyes sharing how confused and scared she feels.

“Why,” you pause and drop your head to clear your throat and hide how ashamed and scared you feel. “Why are you doubting him? Is there…a reason?” You ask as you meet her gaze, noticing that she’s approaching you since you haven’t moved a muscle away from your horse.

“It’s just I think back to that day,” she explains without taking time to think, letting you know that this is what has kept her isolated and upset—“and I can’t help but think that it all ended too quickly. One minute I blacked out in the street and the next I woke up in a car heading to Jackson, and no matter how hard I try to remember something. I come out blank.”

Your eyes sting and your throat aches. Your heart pounds so hard that you fear if she stands too close she’ll hear your fearful heart debating at that moment whether to break your promise to your dad and tell Ellie everything. Not out of guilt but because as you look at her now, her eyes are pleading harder as her soul looks for some kind of sense to that day.

“All I went through to get there couldn’t have amounted to just one day that I wasn’t a part of,” she continues with her eyes filling with tears that only tug at your heart more. “Everything I lost couldn’t have amounted to nothing, could it?”

You remember the promise you made. You remember that day at the hospital and remember that your dad left nothing behind, not even a flicker of hope, because if he had left something alive then they would have come after Ellie, wouldn’t they? And as far as you know no one has come to your door, so you think about the life that she can have and the life you desire for her to have with every fiber of your being.

That desire urges you to keep quiet, but…she’s asking you now with every fiber of her being for the truth and you want to give it to her. She deserves it. She needs it.

Keeping your dad's secret goes against everything you are as a person and it hurts to keep something so important from Ellie, but…it’s the same love you harbor for her. It’s the same desire for her to have a good life that makes you go against yourself and forces you to keep that promise.

“I wish I could give you a clear answer of that day,” you break your silence and fight hard to keep your voice from breaking. “But as I’ve said I didn’t come across my dad until he already had you. I heard everything that happened while I was trying to get out of my restraints. I’m sorry I can’t be more useful, but I trust him.” You nod and finally break away from your spot to approach her and grab her shoulders to look her in the eyes and lie.

“You…do?” Ellie asks with tears still brimming in her eyes and her voice soft.

“I do,” you lie again. “I trust him.”

——

*5 YEARS LATER*

A deep breath leaves your nose, the soft fabric of your glove wrinkles as you fist your hand, and the leather of your jacket crinkles as you lift your hand to knock on the door.

Expecting to get a delayed response, you rest your case on the floor and step back before you strain your ear and catch a moment of silence before you catch the echoes of shuffling and hard footsteps growing louder and louder until finally as a calm wind hits your back, the door opens and a warm smile immediately decorates your features as you come face to face with your beloved father.

“Howdy,” he greets with a small smile.

You pick up your guitar case off the floor and redirect a greeting. “Hey.”

Your dad steps back, welcoming you inside his quiet house so you walk in and right away when you’re enveloped by the warmth of his cozy house you scan the space you can see from the entrance.

“Where’s my Teddy?” You ask excitedly as you tug your boots off.

“Sleepin’,” your dad lets you know as he walks past you and stops by the staircase. “He drank his bottle and fell asleep. It’s been,” he pauses and thinks for a moment. “Twenty minutes.”

You sigh with slight disappointment but nod in comprehension regardless. “That’s good. Thank you. How was he today? He behave?” You ask as you slip into some slippers you have by your dad's entrance.

“‘Course,” your dad assures you right away because even if your son was fussy he wouldn’t care. “We went out for a short walk. Passed by to visit Tommy and Benji, and came back home to eat some lunch. We’ve been here ever since.”

You smile proudly and nod gently. “That’s good,” you praise him and set your guitar case down by the entrance to take your warm layers off next. “Sorry I took long, I had to go pick up some stuff from the house.”

Your dad shakes his head and throws his hand out before he walks away. “Don’t worry, you know Teddy and I enjoy spendin’ time together. He keeps me busy on my days off. How was work?” He asks from the kitchen and actually shares a small chuckle before he explains himself. “It’s still so…crazy that I ask you that now. I don’t think I’ll get used to it.”

You scoff lightheartedly and finally are able to part from the entrance to join him in the kitchen. “Great. Nothing beats being able to plan for a play, but I love working with the animals and tending to the plants. We had to try and get the greenhouses warmer though. This winter really has brought a bad cold, Mia and the clinic are running through medicine like crazy.”

“It’s all those people the council is bringing in,” your dad says loudly without realizing you’re in the kitchen now unloading stuff you’ll need for tonight’s dinner. “We don’t know where they’ve been or what they’re bringing in with them. They need to be more careful,” he repeats the same argument he’s had since fall, and then turns around, getting startled by you being so close.

“Well, we can’t leave ‘em out,” you repeat yourself as you glance down to see what he’s offering you in your unofficially assigned mug. “And it’s not just them. Colds are normal. More so in these cold seasons.”

“Coffee,” he says as the scent wafts in your nose as he pushes the mug closer to you. “Had it ready for when you got here.”

You smile brightly and take the mug from him. “Thank you, Daddy,” you tell him sweetly as you take the mug from him and walk over to the dining table to take a seat, seeing him mirror you as you take a sip of the bitter but warm drink.

“And you sound like Maria,” your dad keeps arguing. “You need to think about your own. Teddy. He’s young and we don’t have the medication we once did when you were a little girl.”

As your dad takes a seat across from you, you put the mug down and swallow thickly before you raise your brow and calmly rebuttal. “A couple we welcomed has a baby just as old as Theo. I worry about my son, we take precautions, but that doesn’t mean we aren’t in the same boat. If we can help, we will. That’s the right thing to do.”

Your dad watches you hard without saying anything verbally, but the wheels of his mind churn with many different thoughts and arguments he wants to share but doesn’t express because he knows you’re too stuck in your own way, just like Maria. Thus instead he drops his gaze and nods stiffly, leaving that topic as it is. For now.

“You hear from Ellie. Is she coming to…our New Year's dinner?” He asks as he keeps his gaze averted as if nervous to hear the response.

“Yeah,” you assure him and watch as he seems to draw in a relieved breath as he keeps his eyes off you—“but she’s bringing her friends.”

Your dad scoffs and takes a sip from his own drink before he finally faces you as he has something to say. “Now she can’t be in my company without her friends? Does she take them to your house too?”

You hold his gaze for a second and then your eyes flicker to your drink to watch the dark coffee before you take a long sip and then shake your head hesitantly. “No,” you deadpan, causing your dad to sigh deeply.

“I swear—”

“Uh,” you cut him off and look up, catching his gaze as he also looks up at you at the same time. “No.” You shake your finger at him. “Look I…feel bad. I do. I want to help too, but I already told you my condition. I’m not taking sides.”

Your dad's gaze twitches to a squint before he drops his head and gently shakes it as if in disbelief at what you just said.

“She’s been keeping my company at dinner,” you do let him know so he’s in the know of some of her whereabouts. You respect her privacy and her boundaries regarding your dad, so you don’t tell him everything he wants to know. You just tell him the mundane things. “I’ve been teaching her some stuff so she’s not just an awesome babysitter, and she actually has a knack for cooking. She could be better, but she’s learning.”

Your dad nods as he takes it all in before he draws out a small breath. “I am sorry I’ve been keeping your husband from dinner, but well, all these plans are hard work,” he sighs. “And he’s eager to learn everything. He can do it all by himself, but he insists on learning from me.”

You smile gleefully. “It’s okay. He doesn’t mind staying behind and I don’t mind either. Plus it makes me happy to hear that you’re working so well together.”

Your dad nods. “He’s…he’s a good guy. Hard worker,” he adds and lifts his head as he rubs his chin. “I couldn’t have asked for a better partner. Nothing like the young men I worked with before the outbreak.”

You laugh softly and pick up your mug to take a drink, but before you do, you watch your drink for a moment with a teasing smile before you take a sip.

“What?” Your dad probes as he notices your smile.

Before you can answer though, you take a longer drink and then set the mug down and ask him a bold question. “When was the last time you talked to someone? Romantically I mean so you’re not a smartass.”

He scoffs in disbelief and you lean in closer and continue since you know it’s going to be hard getting him to cooperate about the matter. “Tomorrow is the New Year community party, it will be a great opportunity to warm up to someone.” You say and shake your shoulders to tease him. “And it’ll be great if you did have someone to talk to.”

“Will it? Or will you be happy if I did?” He asks as he sits back.

You giggle and flash him a smirk before you respond honestly. “It will make me very happy if you meet someone. This house is lonely and you spend too much time alone.”

He shakes his head and argues. “I spend my time with my family. Work. And a lot of quality time with my grandson.”

You chuckle softly. “It’s not that same,” you quickly rebuttal. “You need someone to come home to after work. Someone to have dinners with when I’m not here or when you don’t go with Uncle Tommy. Won’t that be nice?”

Your dad crosses his arms over his chest and keeps shaking his head as he keeps fighting you. “I don’t have the best record with women. You know that. Sarah’s mom left. Your mom…passed. Tess…also died, and with her, I didn’t give her what she gave me.”

You lean over, basically laying on the table to keep arguing your side. “Yes, but that was before. Jackson is as stable as a community is going to be. It can be different. I’m not telling you to have a wild romance, something sweet. I know it can be hard in times like now, but it’s about the time you spend while you’re alive that matters. Don’t think about what might happen, instead live and enjoy the memories you’ll make.”

Your dad holds your gaze softly before he offers you something real. “Tess pushed her way in, it’s not easy otherwise. Not since your mom.”

You blink repeatedly and draw out a small and slow breath before you drag yourself back and mutter. “I know, but you can’t look for my mom or Tess in every woman you see. Look, you don’t have to look for a soulmate and maybe they don’t want that either. Just someone to spend your days with.” You say and shrug sweetly. “So tomorrow I want you to shower, do your hair real nice, wear something dapper, and put on that cologne I made you, okay? And…be less scary.” You flash him a grin.

“Scary?” He scoffs. “What does that even mean?”

“Why don’t we start getting ahead at starting dinner before Maria and Uncle Tommy get here,” you mention as you hop off your seat. “Teddy should still be down a little longer.”

——

*LATER*

“Come on, come on,” you encourage Teddy as you grab his little hand and run to the front door with him in your arms, making him giggle giddily and then kick his feet when you reach the door to let you know he wants to do it again.

Much to your son's excitement though, you stop to open the door, welcoming Jesse, Dina, and his father Apollo.

“Look who I brought with me!” Apollo announces proudly which only makes you smile brightly.

“Howdy, children! I’m so glad you could make it!” You greet Jesse and Dina warmly as they block Apollo. “Please come in. Jesse-boy,” you greet as you look at him and step back to let them pass. “Dina Nolastname,” you tease and without fault, she smiles back at you.

“Sunshine,” she teases back and walks in first with a much brighter smile lighting up her face as she stretches her arms out. “Teddy!” She exclaims and takes your baby from you before she heads inside.

“This is for you,” Jesse says as he walks in and hands you a dessert plate.

“Oh why, you’ll have to thank your mom for me,” you tell him as he walks in taking his coat off.

“Actually I made it,” he retorts, making you laugh and pat his shoulder. Thus in response, he turns around to look at you with his eyebrow raised.

“I did,” he insists and you laugh harder before you calm down and look at him with a wobbly smile.

“Oh, Jesse,” you coo and say nothing else because you know him. You know Dina too, not just because they’re both Ellie’s best friends, but because since they are younger and more active in the community, besides working alongside them, you’re now in charge of teaching them everything they need to know. Albeit you do spend more time with Jesse than with Dina.

“That’s unfair,” Jesse grumbles as he can’t make his lie convincing to you. “You’re unfair.”

You snicker and pat his shoulder again as he walks away. “I’ll let you have it if anyone else asks!” You throw out after him.

“Yeah, yeah,” he says over his shoulder before he disappears into the dining room to greet everyone already inside, leaving you to lastly greet your husband Apollo.

Albeit rather than greeting him normally, after he closes the door and takes off his warm layers you raise your hand to show off your palm.

“Look,” you pout and show off your injury.

However, instead of treating you kindly and worrying, the bastard high-fives you with a sly grin.

You gasp because it stings your wound and your feelings.

“It’s serious,” you remark and he laughs harder before he closes the gap between you to gently take your wrist and press a kiss on the tip of your fingers, avoiding the big red mark on your palm.

“What happened?” He whispers against your lips as he leans in closer as if wanting to rob you of your breath.

“I burnt myself grabbing a hot plate,” you explain and he giggles this time before he brings your hand up to press another gentle kiss on your fingers before he puts your hand on his cheek and then grabs your jaw to smash his lips against yours and start a passionate kiss you almost lose yourself in.

Albeit after you steal a few steamy minutes for yourselves, you pull back but don’t stray from each other, he wraps his arm around your shoulders as you both walk inside.

“You take care of it?” He asks with concern.

You nod. “Yeah, but it still hurts.”

He smiles and caresses your shoulder. “It’ll pass. Let’s bandage it and take something for the pain.”

You smile giddily and hold onto his waist harder. “Tequila?” You ask.

“Duh.”

You pat his torso and interject. “I brought you your comfy shoes. Oh, and your harmonica! Maybe you’ll join in for a song? My Uncle Tommy and I plan to play a duet.”

He nods. “Maybe I will.”

It’s no clear answer but regardless you smile because you’ll get him to do what you want.

In any case with the people you were waiting on already here, you don’t linger any longer. You gather around the table to try and officially start dinner with Ellie sitting at the opposite end of the table to be as far away from your dad as possible so it’s hard for him to steal a glimpse of her, and easy for her to avoid looking at him.

You would do anything in your power for them to at least sit across each other so they could face one another. It’s not going to solve their problems no matter how much you want things to be that easy, but it would…ease your aching heart having Ellie be able to at least look him in the eye.

Alas, you don’t push it.

“Hey,” a soft voice speaks, making you look down to see your cousin Benji dragging a chair back to be able to sit next to your son's high chair. “Can I help you feed him?” Benji asks. “My dad let me feed him some snacks today.”

“You'll have to eat too. I can’t have you starving if you’re feeding your cousin,” you explain to your five-year-old cousin. “How can you grow up to be as strong and tall as your daddy then?”

Benji glances at your Uncle Tommy and then glances over at Apollo bringing Teddy over to sit him in his high chair. “I promise I’ll eat along with him too then. Can I?”

The corner of your lips pulls to a smile and you stop messing with him and nod. “‘Course you can. I needed help anyway.”

Benji grins and then turns to shake Teddy gently, causing the baby to blabble something back to him as he watches Benji sit down.

“Before we start eatin’,” your dad steals your attention and catches you off guard by speaking up first without having to be told to.

“I would just like to say…with this year coming to a close…that I’m grateful for having my grandson joining us for the first time this year. I'm looking forward to sharing many more years with him.”

You smile proudly and share your glee with Apollo before you focus back on your dad as he continues while he nervously scratches the back of his head.

“And I’m hoping that we…can gather like this. Like a family again. No matter what happened in the past it’s good to be amongst each other because we’re all we have…” he trails off to end his speech abruptly, so you and Apollo share a knowing look since you both conclude that the last bit of your dad's speech is about one person in particular. Ellie knows it too, you know she does, but she avoids all eye contact, making things awkward for all those who know what happened between her and your dad.

“Does anyone else want to add anything else?” Maria interjects and you all look around at one another in silence and curiosity until Jesse cuts in.

“I would just like to add one short thing,” he addresses the table. “Thank you for having Dina and I, here at this family dinner. It’s really an honor and I hope we didn’t intrude.”

“Of course not,” your Uncle Tommy assures him kindly. “You both are welcome anytime. You’re Ellie’s best friend’s, you’re like family.”

You nod gently in agreement and Dina interjects this time. “Thank you.”

Once again you all wait just in case someone wants to say something, but after a while of silence, Maria thankfully brings the moment to a close. “Okay, let’s eat then.”

You turn to grab your son's food and whisper to Apollo. “Kill me next time that happens.”

“You shoulda said something,” he says.

You scoff. “Nothing I said could’ve saved that.”

“No, but it would help us forget.”

You both laugh and then you turn to your son and show off his food. “Who wants to eat?” You ask in a sing-song voice, making his eyes go wide and his feet kick like wild. “You and me both,” you tell him.

Thankfully during dinner, there were no more awkward moments. Yes, you liked your dad's speech. It was sweet, and as much as you want him to mend things with Ellie, that last bit was too forward. He’s lucky she didn’t react whatsoever and make a scene.

Besides that, nevertheless, dinner was perfect, everyone got along, there were conversations had across the table, at the sides, and at the ends. Laughs were shared, and many drinks were poured. It makes it easy to forget what exists past the walls of your town, and it makes it easy to forget that no matter what’s between you and them you’re never safe as long as they’re alive. It adds a sense of doom to every moment as if it might be your last.

At least ever since your dad took Ellie from that hospital and killed every chance of a normal life, that’s something that’s lived in the back of your head. You make sure to keep it there, but it’s still there, pestering you and you know it.

Maybe that’s why you have come to enjoy every moment even more. Or maybe it’s because you have everything you could need in life. Whatever it is, you like to mark every moment as beautiful.

Yet nothing can compare to moments around a campfire with your family and music. You love those the most.

“Hey,” Dina directs at you as she drops herself on the empty seat next to you.

“Hello��Dina,” you probe as you tune your guitar with your baby strapped to your chest.

“I thought that maybe…maybe the day after tomorrow we could get Joel and Ellie together for a movie night,” she suggests knowing the tension but not knowing exactly why it was there—“we could watch Curtis and Viper. They like that movie.”

You stop tweaking your guitar to turn and face Dina with your eyes glimmering with joy. “That would be a good idea,” you praise her. “It’s not too obvious but just enough of a push,” you explain, making her nod in agreement with a smirk.

“Yeah exactly!” She exclaims. “So?”

You sigh. “You're gonna have to do it solo. I have to teach the kids choir and then the adult choir right after.”

Dina slumps down and hums in disappointment but you nudge her to assure her. “It’s okay, she’ll go if you do. As long as you’re there she’ll be there.”

Dina’s eyes flicker up to you and they widen a bit before she hides her smirk by looking down. She’s about to add something, but then you’re interrupted.

“What’s going on over here?” Ellie tries to join the conversation, ending the conversation you were just having so as to not ruin Dina’s plan.

“Suggesting. No, pleading that Sunshine here sings some Joan Baez. She really kills those songs,” Dina lies smoothly with a small smile directed at Ellie.

“Hm,” Ellie hums and looks between you and Dina, so you turn away to finish tuning your guitar whilst Dina gets up and points back. “I did promise Benji we’d play the tambourine together. So. Join me or…what?”

Ellie holds her gaze for a moment before she nods slowly. “It’s not like you’re asking.”

Dina giggles and shrugs before she turns away to join Benji, leaving Ellie to now stare down at you.

“You’re going tomorrow to the New Year's party, right?” You ask her to avoid getting questioned.

“Well,” she sighs. “There’s not much of a choice.”

“That’s what I like to hear!” You exclaim at her over your shoulder. “Do your hair, wear something clean and nice, and put on that nice perfume I made for you. And…be in a party mood.”

Ellie scoffs. “What do you mean? What’s wrong with my hair?”

“Bun or half up,” you tell her the options you like.

Ellie scoffs and touches her hair before she walks around you, blocking the warmth of the campfire. “I’ll do it if you allow me to go on that patrol with you and Jesse the day after tomorrow.”

You finally finish tuning your guitar and then face her with your lips pursed. “You’ll listen?” You deadpan.

She nods quickly but you don’t know if she actually means it. She has the tendency not to listen to orders or go by the book. It’s why you don’t like patrolling with her and especially not when Dina is tagging along. You like patrolling with them separately or else you just really lose your patience.

“Fine,” you give in, knowing that either way she was going to that event tomorrow. “Just don’t wear your beat-up Converse. Please.”

She rolls her eyes and nods. “Yeah, yeah.”

You watch her walk off to join Dina and Benji before you feel your little one moving, so you look down and notice that he woke up.

“You’re supposed to be sleeping Theo,” you whisper and he yawns and rubs his eyes before he begins to wiggle around, leaving you no choice but to take him out and sit him on your lap pressed against you.

“You’re lucky you’re cute,” you muse and kiss the top of his head. “Do you want to help me play today, hm?”

Teddy turns away from the guitar and nuzzles his head against your chest but stays wide awake instead of trying to fall back to sleep. Thereafter footsteps approach you from behind before a warm arm wraps your neck, filling your nose with their comforting scent, and wrapping your body with more warmth as he presses himself against you.

“What are you playing with Tommy?” Apollo asks before he presses a kiss on the top of your head.

“Something you can play too,” you let him know and grab his hand while he leans over to kiss the top of Teddy's head before pressing another kiss on your lips, making you smile giddily while not realizing that your dad couldn’t help but watch the tender moment from across the campfire.

“I like the sound of that,” Apollo says against your lips before he slips away to sit next to you instead.

“You ready, Sunny?” Your Uncle Tommy finally blurts, making you sit up straighter and grin.

“Of course. I always am!”

With nothing else to add and with nothing but pure joy and gleeful excitement, you start the jamming session. As the song picks up, your Uncle joins in with his own guitar, Apollo joins in with his harmonica, and Benji and Dina lastly join in with their tambourines, while Maria, Ellie, Jesse, and your dad listen with amusement.

That is until you abruptly stop and hand Teddy to Apollo before you jump up, stopping everyone in their tracks to look at you and wait.

“Oh my gosh!” You exclaim and look at your uncle and Maria. “Uncle Tommy, Maria, tell everyone about what we have planned for spring!” You squeal with your guitar in hand before you run behind your Uncle Tommy to wrap your arms around his neck with excitement, making him lift his hand to grab onto your arm.

“Oh,” Maria laughs quietly. “Yeah. Well it’s not set in stone, but we—”

“We have to talk to the council,” you cut her off as you can’t contain your excitement and hug your Uncle tighter. “But we want to do a spring fair!” You laugh and let go of your uncle to go sit back down next to Apollo while still drumming your feet against the ground.

“Sunny wants to do that for her birthday,” your Uncle shares what you left out and you nod eagerly.

“Course she does,” your dad mumbles while you continue.

“I heard that,” you point at him.

“Good,” he quips.

“Pft,” you blow out and go on. “And…” you trail off and nudge Apollo. “Tell ‘em, Darlin’!”

Apollo scoffs and smiles at you. As he parts his lips albeit you’re too excited to let him share the news. “We—”

“You’re having another baby!” Dina interrupts you just as excitedly, but you snap your fingers and shake your head.

“No. If we do the fair our band,” you continue and grab Apollo's arm to shake him gently. “M.A.M.A. is getting back together to play at the fair! Isn’t that so fun?!” You giggle and Jesse claps.

“Wait what,” Dina interjects with amusement and confusion. “You’re part of a band. What do you play?”

“Folk music mostly,” you share with glee.

“They’re good too,” Jesse shares with the group since he along with your uncle Tommy and Maria are the only ones who’ve heard you play.

“I of course am—”

“Lead,” Ellie continues for you, making your dad chuckle because she’s right.

“Exactly,” you direct at her. “And I sing with my guitar,” you continue and don’t share anything else about anyone else just your role. “We will play for the two days we want the fair to be.”

“We just need to talk to the council,” your uncle lets everyone know. “But we think it’ll be a good community event.”

You nod eagerly in agreement.

“Well you have your husband, your uncle, and Maria on the council so how hard will that be to get across,” Ellie inputs with a sly smirk, but you take no offense to it.

“That’s right,” Dina chimes in along with Ellie. “You’re like a Nepo baby.”

Again you take no offense to it. You just smile proudly. “Well if anyone had to take that role it would be me,” you gloat and press yourself against Apollo. “Okay. Can we continue playing?”

In response, Benji hands his instrument to Ellie.

“Wait where are you going?” Dina remarks as Benji runs around the fire to join your side

“Hey, can I sing with you?” He asks as he ignores Dina.

You smile and nod. “‘Course you can. I’ll play and you lead!”

He nods. “I want to sing the song you and my daddy play.”

“It Ain’t Me, Babe?” You ask and he nods—“Okay! Ready?”

“Always.”

“That’s what I like to hear.” You laugh and once again begin to play.

Now the session may not be perfect, but you don’t care, you love every second of it. Every second is perfect to you and you only wish the night could be filled with your music for eternity. You want nothing more but to stay playing music with your family. You want to see their smiles and see them enjoy themselves. You want to feel like you aren’t torn with Ellie and your dad’s estrangement, and being around the campfire playing music gave you a taste of that. It gave him a taste of it too even if they were far and never spoke because at least you were together.

And that’s all you could ask for, being all together.

——

*THE NEXT DAY*

Between fall and winter, it’s been hard taking your son outside because your dad is right, medication is not the same as it was before, which means you need to be careful that he doesn’t get sick but you also need to make sure that he has a good immune system. Thus when you can you like taking your son with you to the animal pens to visit the gentler animals like the rabbits and the sheep for example. Plus it helps so he doesn’t grow up scared of them.

Albeit he doesn’t seem to share the same fascination for animals as you do. For example, a bunny seems to be curious about him sitting amongst them so it gently hops over, causing little Teddy to look up at you with concern and panic.

“It’s okay,” you assure him as you caress his cheek with your knuckle. “They won’t hurt you. They’re just curious, that's all.”

Teddy turns around to crawl to you so you pick him off the ground and sit him on your lap before you bend down to take a little bunny off the ground.

“Look,” you coo as you pet the bunny's head. “It's a baby just like you. He’s gentle just like Hermes.”

Theo hides his face against you so you gently cup his cheek with one hand to caress him too.

“You know your auntie Sarah liked bunnies too,” you tell your son. “Not as much as she liked butterflies, but she did want a rabbit because your grandpa didn’t want to deal with a dog until she was older.”

Teddy eyes the bunny you still hold and you slowly get the bunny close to him again. “In the spring we’ll be able to take them outside and we’ll all be in the meadow in our backyard so you can see the Rue flowers your grandpa and I planted for your grandma. They’re yellow and small. And then we’ll see the flowers we planted for Sarah. How will you like that?”

Teddy watches the bunny and then glances at you with uncertainty.

“It’s okay, we’ll try another time, hm?” You assure him and put the bunny down so it can hop back to the others, letting Teddy relax and put his hand out to call out for it now that it’s far. When he doesn't gain their attention he then drags himself off your lap and gets on his hands and knees to try and crawl close to the rabbits all huddled in one corner eating away.

You watch him to make sure he doesn’t pick anything off the ground and puts it in his mouth while also trying not to be too paranoid. Your dad says if you’re scared then they’ll be scared too, so you just watch him with awe. That’s all you can feel every day you set your eyes on him. You never thought you’d ever feel that way about anything ever and that’s not to say you don’t look at Apollo or anyone else you love with admiration, there’s just a different kind of admiration that you feel when you look at your son and you never knew such a tender thing existed until you first laid your eyes on him.

Alas, the door to the small animal barn opens and when you peek back you see your Uncle Tommy walking in.

“Hiya,” he greets with a warm smile. “Knew I’d find ya here.”

You smile sweetly and wait until he’s in the rabbit pen with you before you question why he has his rifle with him. “You just come back from shootin’?”

He nods as he watches Teddy watching the rabbits now that they’re not near him. “Yeah.”

“Did Ellie end up going with you?” You probe knowing the answer to that since she had told you about it and asked you to go to be in quote “like old times”, when you know she wanted to make shooting infected a competition.

“She wouldn’t miss it even if I tried to make her,” your Uncle says. “But then again I tell myself that it’s best to do what she wants and not what Joel wants.”

You nod in agreement as you watch Teddy crawl back to you with eagerness after he’s spotted his Uncle Tommy.

“Exactly. You’ll only get her mad if you try to interfere. It’s like I tell my dad, it’s best to let her be. She doesn’t need us looking after her anymore. She’ll learn from her mistakes.”

“Try to make him understand,” he grumbles and grins widely as Teddy finally reaches him. “Hey, Teddy! What are you doin’, huh? Are you chasing those rabbits?”

You roll your eyes and scoff as Teddy babbles and pushes himself to his feet using your uncle's knee.

“Just a couple more months and you’ll have a hard time catching up to him,” your uncle says as he picks Teddy off the ground to carry him in his arms. “You’ll be nothing like your mama, will ya, little Teddy Bear? All she wanted to do was be carried by me or her daddy at your age.”

Your uncle tickles Teddy’s belly, making the baby giggle before he throws himself on his uncle's shoulder and pats his back as if it’s been years since he last saw him.

“How was it?” You ask your uncle as you stand to your given height and walk over to pick a bunny off the ground to keep it toasty and warm in your arms.

“Oh, you know,” your uncle sighs as he rubs your son's back. “There’s only more and more coming down.”

You gently rub the bunny's head and sigh deeply even though you already knew that. You just hoped it had changed since the last time you went to patrol.

“I wanted to ask you if you could go out there and scout. Come up with a way to divert the infected away from town before we have a herd in our hands we can’t control. I know.” He nods. “I know you don’t want to put yourself at risk with your little one here now, but with Eugene gone, there’s only so many people with the experience I need who can come up with something that will work.”

You glance at the bunny and watch it nod to sleep as you lull it with the way you pet its head. “I’ve been going on Patrol’s because there’s been an influx of infected,” you remind him so he doesn’t beat himself up.

“I know,” he whispers. “But I just…” he trails off. “Your dad is right. You and Apollo need to avoid risking your lives if it’s not necessary.”

You smile softly and glance up at him. “And he says Apollo is eager to work with him,” you mention.

Your uncle chuckles and Teddy lifts his head off your uncle's shoulder to look between you and your uncle out of curiosity—“Apollo is eager and he’s good at all of it. He could replace your dad if he wanted to, but your dad…puts him on the schedule more than he should. It’s his way of caring without saying it.”

You smile proudly and nod softly before you reassure your uncle about his concern. “It’s okay. Hopefully, this is a temporary problem. Plus I won’t go scout alone. Nor will I conduct the plan alone when the day comes.”

Your uncle looks unsure but he really does trust you more than anyone, so even if he doesn’t want to he has to rely on you.

“With Mia needed at the hospital. Atlas working at the Dam, and Apollo with his hands busy with all that plannin’ and construction is it fine if I take Jesse?”

Your uncle nods right away. “Yeah, of course. The kid is smart.”

You nod in agreement with a smirk. “He is and he listens better than Ellie, that’s why I like teaming up with him.”

Your uncle chuckles.

“But I’ll take her too. I won’t have her cooped up here just because the old man wants it.”

“Uh, yeah that ain’t goin’ to work. She’s leavin’ with Alpine group. You need more people though? I can go or Maria can go too.” He offers but you shake your head.

“No, no, it’s not that I needed more people. Jesse and I will be okay on our own. I just wanted to take Ellie. That’s all,” you let him know before you put the bunny down to start heading out of the pen now that you have a new task.

“Where are you heading after this?” You ask your uncle as he follows after you with your son still in his arms.

“I’m going to meet up with your dad and Maria.”

You nod in comprehension before you slow down to let him catch up before you ask what you need from him now. “If that’s so could you take Teddy with you? His dad should be off work real soon so it won’t be long, but I need to go get ready so I can head out sooner rather than later. I’ll let Apollo know, so you just need to watch him. Could you do that for me?” You ask and bat your lashes even though his answer is easy to guess.

“Of course I can. The little guy isn’t fussy and Benji loves to look after him.” Your uncle assures you, making you sigh with relief and smile tenderly.

“Great, thank you, that saves me a lotta time.” You ramble and hook your arm around his as you head out of the barn and face the bitter outdoors. “Also can we talk about last night? That speech,” you laugh awkwardly and your uncle laughs with you—“I appreciate my dad for tryin’ but couldn’t he have been more obvious?!”

“That’s what I told Maria, but she doesn’t get it like you do.” He teases. “He just needs to let Ellie breathe. That’s all she needs. He’s lucky she wants to be in the same room as him as it is. He’s only pushing it.”

You sigh and nod lightly. “Yeah. That’s what I’m saying, but he’s in denial. He doesn’t want to admit he did something wrong. Until he does nothing will change and I won’t be a part of it. As Ellie’s family member stuck in the middle, she deserves that from me at least.”

“It’s a real sticky situation, but that’s good Sunny,” your uncle praises you. “And it’s a good thing you didn’t say anythin’ last night either. Nothing could have saved that.”

You giggle and shake your head. “No, I know.”

You smile faintly and add nothing else on the matter. You continue walking together until you have to take your separate paths, so while your uncle walks to where he's heading to with your son, you let Apollo know the new plan. And since there’s not much Apollo can say but be careful and that he understands what he needs to do, you don’t take long to go get ready for your scouting mission, nor do you take long to head out to the horse barn by the gates, catching the Alpine group on their way out.

Thus you hide in the background so Ellie and Dina don’t notice you and make a big deal. Albeit you do notice that Ellie’s ex-girlfriend Kat is in the same group, so Godspeed to her for having to deal with Dina and Ellie together. They’re like…little devils when they’re paired up.

“You’re doing the Alpine run,” you hear Jesse announce. “I know a couple of you are new to this trail, so listen up. You’re taking Route 191 down to Hoback…” he trails off as Dina catches his attention when she raises her hand, which knowing her is nothing good or something completely surprisingly smart.

“Yes, Dina,” he picks on her, letting her share what she needs to say.

“Hi, uhm, should we stick to the roads, scan the countryside, hit our checkpoints, and sign the log books?”

You roll your eyes but you still can’t help but be amused.

“You know what?” You hear Jesse say. “That sounds great. But while you’re doing all that, we’ve got reports of strays. So be careful when you get into the town,” he says as he hands the others the flags for today. “Now, I see Ellie over here looking like Curtis and Viper.”

You chuckle and clap softly, knowing that neither of them caught you.

“The fuck?” You hear Ellie remark before Jesse continues.

“So, let me remind you, this is just a recon patrol. If you see one or two runners, that’s fine, clear ‘em out. Anything more, anything worse you come on back and we send out a squad. Understood?”

“You know you’re only, like four years older than us, right?” Ellie interjects and Jesse thankfully ignores her.

“Just say you understood.”

Ellie nods and mocks him using that deep voice. “Understood.”

“Thank you!” He exclaims and turns around to give the people at the gate a signal to open the doors. “Your patrol leader is Kat, so you will follow her orders. When you’re back, today's all-clear sign is yellow. Yellow, good. Green, bad.” He finishes saying before he walks over to Dina and Ellie to hand them their flags and tell them something you don’t catch, so you just wait until the team is walking out the door before you break away from your spot, and head towards Jesse who's already expecting you actually because he saw you a couple times while he was giving his instructions.

“Hey,” you greet him warmly when you meet halfway. “How’s your day been?”

He shrugs. “Can't complain,” he says. “You?”

You shake your head gently. “I can’t complain either. Had a slow start today, so I’m fully energized for later. You goin’ right?”

He sighs as he turns away to head back to the barn knowing you’ll follow without having to be told. “Only for a little bit.”

You scoff. “Oh, come on. It’ll be fun! I mean there’s gonna be music and drinks. And it’s gonna be fun.”

He draws out a small breath and drops his head as he shrugs. “I don’t know. We do have early patrol and you and Apollo do end the night early, so where’s the fun in that?”

You chuckle. “Well we do have a ten-month-old who we have to tend to and it’s just…well, if you have a kid you’ll know, but the day is always busy. Anyway, we can talk about that later, I came to you for a reason. Would you want to come with me on a quick scouting mission? Just up to the Ski Lodge. We won’t take long, and if you’re busy then it’s okay. It just didn’t hurt to ask.”

Jesse raises his head to look at you and without thinking too much about his response he nods. “Yeah, I’d like that actually. You heading out now?”

You nod to answer his question, so without dragging it out any longer since you’re both already ready to head out, you just have a horse saddled, and take your preferred weapons for protection since you’re not supposed to be out there killing anything.

“Oh,” you add as you walk past the front gate. “Ellie is coming with us tomorrow by the way. She thought she was making a deal but I knew she was going to the party tonight regardless so,” you let him know.

“So she was trying to manipulate you,” he says and you laugh softly and add on.

“She attempted.”

He laughs and you secure your grip around your reins before you scan the area, catching nothing but a snowy field. Yet you still look out.

“Are you taking Dina tonight?” You ask as you keep your eyes out.

“Uhm, no…we broke up.”

You scoff and quickly snap your attention to him to look at him with surprise. “What? When did it happen? You guys got to my dad's place together.”

He nods and averts his gaze to take his turn keeping an eye out. “Yeah well we all ran into each other, so that was just a coincidence, but yeah it just happened.”

“Aw man,” you sigh with an apologetic smile. “Sorry, Jesse-boy.”

He shrugs and glances over at you. “You know I’m getting used to it so it doesn’t matter.”

You hum and he doesn’t let his eyes linger, but he holds your gaze for a moment too long so you notice the speechless cry for help and wedge yourself in whether he wants your help or not.

“Now, I’m going to give you my unsolicited advice here, okay?” You warn him, earning a quick acknowledging glance.

“Please, go ahead. I don’t mind. Especially when it comes from you, you know that,” he says kindly so you sigh and let your eyes linger on him for a while before you look at your path ahead and draw in a breath to share your thoughts.

“Have you tried permanently breaking up? I just mean it’s your whatever time breaking up, maybe the healthiest thing will be to take your time apart. Figure yourselves out, maybe test new waters. You have options here in Jackson, you know? Take advantage of it, and who knows.” You shrug with a soft look on your face so he knows you’re just trying your best to be helpful and share your concern. “Maybe a couple of years down the line, you’ll wind up back together stronger than before.”

You take your eyes off the white blanketed fields broken by other horse tracks and look over at him, catching him watching the area around you in a rather stoic way before his shoulders rise as he takes a deep breath and then glances over at you and breathes out. “Maybe you’re right. It's just easy with her you know? We know each other. We can skip all the formalities and get back to it,” he opens himself up to you so you take it more seriously.

“Yeah, I bet, but it can’t be healthy for either of you to continue this cycle,” you argue. “I mean I know I don’t have much experience in the area. My first serious boyfriend died…and I married the other one who was already my best friend, but I like to think I can still differentiate between what’s good and what’s not.”

Jesse finds your gaze and holds it for a moment before he shrugs softly. “I’d rather have little experience with something long-term like you and Apollo than go from partner to partner, so I don’t mind your little experience actually. I mean you and Apollo look happy, are you not?”

You smile with admiration and nod. “Yeah we are but we both actually loved someone else before we became more than just friends. So you can love more than one person.”

Jesse nods gently and sighs deeply.

“Think about it,” you tell him so he doesn’t have so much on his mind now. “Consider it. You can go on as you are or try and move on.”

“Thank you,” he says without sharing if he came up with something or not. “I can’t really get advice like this from Ellie, you know? She’s…awkward about this stuff and well none of my other friends have advice like you and Apollo.”

“So we’re old?” You tease and he looks at you wide-eyed and shakes his head, so you giggle and reassure him. “I’m messin’ with ya. I take pride in having some mature advice.” You flash him a smile. “Especially for someone who doesn’t tease me at the end because she can’t just say thank you. She has to be weird about it. Just like my dad.”

“I swear,” Jesse chuckles. “If I didn’t know them like I do, I’d think they’re blood-related.”

You touch your chest and nod. “Right? I get scared sometimes and I’m like ‘hey are ya sure Ellie isn’t somehow your kid too’?”

“It’s unbelievable sometimes.”

You nod softly in agreement as you guide your horses to do a turn so you can head up the hill that takes you to the lodge just above. And since it’s not snowing, getting up to the lodge is easy. It is cold, but that doesn’t slow the horses down like when falling snow makes the walk harder to trudge on or obscures their view.

Nevertheless, when you reach the lodge Jesse finally asks why you’re here. The guy had just completely followed you without question. This could’ve been just an escape for all he knew and he still followed.

“So why did we come here?”

You grab the telescope that’s inside the lodge and begin dragging it with you to the porch. “My uncle Tommy wants to divert the crowd of infected away from Jackson, so he sent me up here to come up with a plan to avoid having a herd gather up too close for comfort.”

“Oh, I see. Okay. That’s smart.” He says as he jogs ahead to open the back doors for you so you can walk out with ease.

“I’m thinking fireworks,” you share what you’ve come up with. “It’s loud enough for stragglers and crowds of them to hear. And with them working with a hive mind, once one follows they all do, so fireworks are loud and big enough to trigger that.”

You place the telescope down and turn it to point it out so you can take a quick scan before you step away and point your head to the scope. “Do you want to take a look, share something quick you can come up with?” You direct at Jesse, and without hesitation, he fixes the collar of his jacket and his gloves before he steps forward and takes a longer look than you did so he can make sure to look at every point and corner.

You like to think you have memorized the area so you didn’t need time to look, you were already cooking up a plan, but it was still smart to come scout before you put something down on paper.

“Well,” Jesse fills the silence and backs up slowly. “It wouldn’t be smart to lead them forward. There’s the dam, and we’ll just risk them turning around because of the rivers.”

You nod slowly in agreement with a proud look decorating your features.

“Plus,” he adds on. “Any infected behind Jackson will come forward and run into town. The same goes if we want to work the other way around.”

“Yes,” you praise him and step forward to look through the telescope and look out at some mountains to the side of Jackson. “So I was thinking we take the lowest path in between the mountains just there.” You point out and move back so he can take a look. “It’s far enough so if any avalanches happen they won’t hit us or any hunting grounds, and easy for us to cross as well as them.”

“Yeah,” Jesse interjects. “I see.”

“We get ahead of the infected first and then set off the fireworks. We wait and when we see movement we just move back once.”

“Then we circle around and come back,” Jesse shares exactly what you were thinking about. “We watch where they’re coming from and since we’ll be at lower altitude we’ll have plenty of space to take any path around them.”

You grin and nod. “Exactly!” You exclaim and then point out. “If they do get closer we can make explosives. Create an avalanche to block their way to us.”

He huffs. “You learn that from Eugene? He was very tactical.”

You scoff and nod. “Some of it. The Fireflies loved blowing shit up. I was young then so I didn’t do much of the action, but I still learned a lot from them. We all did, and that’s why we need to look out and see if we can come up with other alternatives until we have enough to choose one that has the highest chance of being successful.”

Jesse grins and claps gently. “Okay, let’s do it. I’m so down.”

“Good.” You smile softly and point your head at the telescope before you return to it to do as you said.

——

*LATER THAT NIGHT*

“Henry, gimme the gun.” Your dad pleads softly.

“Henry. Henry, please.”

His eyes find you through his shock, they’re struck with fear and clouded with tears. You carefully try to reach out for the gun glued to his hand while your dad keeps pleading.

“Gimme the gun. Gimme the gun.”

You plead too in disparate attempts to get the gun from his hand whilst your own heart gets struck with fear over the fact that you don’t know what he’s going to do next, but you also feel a twinge of hope as he remains still because it means he can put the gun down, but then…

The next thing you know his blood stains your clothes as you cradle his lifeless body in your hands...

You used to imagine and dream of how life could’ve been with Henry when you finally returned to Jackson and stayed long-term, and you always pictured a sweet life. You probably would’ve had a kid too, or at least you would’ve liked one. He would have a happy life in Jackson, or at least you liked to think so.

Once you started falling in love with Apollo and when your grief turned to fond memories, you stopped dreaming and imagining a life you could never have. Instead, your dreams drew up Apollo and your life with him. You imagined so many great and sweet things, and now everything you have imagined has come to flourishion. Most importantly you’re happy—no you’re beyond happy with your life, and the thought of Henry being happy and proud of your life and the fact that you moved on makes you happy.

“Hey, you ready in here? I’m getting hungry,” Apollo announces his presence as walks into your shared room with your baby in hand.

“Oh,” you gasp and clutch onto the sunpin in your hand before you turn to face him, noticing his lips spread to a cheeky smile.

“Look at you,” he muses as he looks at you up and down slowly before he breaks away from where he is to approach you. “You look beautiful.”

You smile timidly and drop your head. “Thank you,” you whisper as if it’s your first time hearing it. “You,” draw in a deep breath and lift your head to check him out in his black and white plaid wool overcoat. “You look incredibly handsome. I almost don’t want to go to that party.”

He chuckles and grabs his chest. “Oh, you hit me right in my weak spot.”

You giggle and close the gap between you, letting him stroke your chin with his pupils completely blown out and his lips turned to a smirk. “There’s no need to celebrate New Year's because I have everything I could ever want,” he whispers and slides his hand to your jaw to pull you in for a gentle kiss before you’re interrupted by your son yelling out.

“Oh, why you look the best, Teddy,” you direct at Theo as you press your hands on Apollo’s chest and smile brightly at your son. “You always do.”

He babbles and you and Apollo laugh.

“Oh you’re ready to go, are you? Have someone to see?” You tease and pinch his cheek, making him giggle, and then reach his arms out so you could hold him instead—“Okay, hold on, let me get my shawl first.”

With haste you walk away to grab your light blue shawl off the bed and drape it around your shoulders, completing your outfit and coordinating the blue shawl with your white shin-length dress that has flowers embroidered on it.

Before you announce that you’re finished, however, you put the pin back on your picture wall and admire it for a second before you face your family and offer their impatience some relief. “Okay, let’s go.”

You proceed to try and take Teddy, but he changes his mind and stays with his dad so you hook your arm around Apollo’s and walk to the church where the party is being held.

“Maybe we should’ve brought his stroller,” you say when you’re more than halfway at your destination.

“Please,” Apollo scoffs. “I’m sure there will be plenty of arms for him to go to. It’s a miracle he even wants to start walking.”

You hum and press the side of your face against his shoulder and think out loud. “I wonder if Ellie will make it.”

“I’m sure she will. Her friends will be here and even if she tries to play cool she will be where her family and friends are. She doesn’t like missing out,” he tries to assure you. “Yeah, you’re right.” You sigh and choose to believe it so your stomach is not in knots. “Anyway thank you for letting me take a longer nap. I think you should have woken me up because you were out there—”

“Eh, eh,” Apollo cuts you off and drifts his eyes to you. “Stop that. I told you we’re not going to do that. Our home life is not a job, okay?”

You draw out a small breathless chuckle and nod before you kiss his shoulder and nuzzle against him again.

“I will say though,” he interjects. “This did earn me cool points and now I’m maxed out.”

You lift your head off his shoulder and giggle before you pull him incredibly closer. “There will be a lot of arms to hold our little Teddy Bear, we could sneak out.”

“Ah, like a couple of horny teenagers.” He grins. “I like that. Hot.”

“Well we’re not teenagers, but we are horny adults.”

He snorts and nods his head. He seems like he wants to say something witty but then Teddy yells out, “Pa!” and flings himself forward. You and Apollo follow his line of gaze and catch your dad approaching the church completely unaware you’re behind him since he’s partially deaf and probably has shitty eyesight.

“Daddy!” You call out and break away from Apollo, catching your dad's attention and making him stop in his tracks to look over and smile immediately.

“Hey,” he greets happily.

You quicken your step to reach him and greet him with a gentle embrace while he takes this time to kiss the top of your head before he offers you a more personal greeting.

“Hey, Baby. You look real pretty.”

“And you look clean and well put together,” you tease, making him roll his eyes.

“Yeah after I was threatened.”

You roll your eyes now and push him gently before you fight back. “Advised kindly.” You say and turn as Apollo catches up to you.

“Hello again, Apollo,” your dad directs at your husband.

“Sir,” Apollo says with a faint smile before he’s interrupted by Teddy reaching out for his grandpa which only makes your dad incredibly happy.

“Hey there Teddy,” he muses and takes him from Apollo. “You’re lookin’ like a real nice gentleman, cowboy.”

Teddy looks at him with his eyes bright and full of adoration and tries to say something but his inability to speak coherently only lets him babble.

“Look what you forgot at my house,” your dad mentions and reaches in his back pocket to pull out Teddy’s wooden horse that your dad made, and that Teddy absolutely loves. Thus he quickly snatches it from your dad and starts chewing on it.

“And you’re matchin’” you point out the blue flannel Teddy is wearing under his overalls.

Your dad finally catches the flannel and grins. “Well, would you look at that? Aren’t we a dapper pair?”

You smile with awe and watch him turn to continue heading inside. You and Apollo follow after them and only grow more eager to head inside and join the party when you’re hit with the most delicious smell of grilled food and finally register the soft folk music playing inside.

“Before I forget,” your dad interjects and peers back. “After patrol is it okay if I pick up Theo from daycare? You could pick him up at your usual time? Is that fine?”

You and Apollo share a speechless look since you both know your answer without having to communicate it.

“Yeah, that’s fine. I’ll pack his stuff then.” You let him know, so right away your dad looks at your son and grabs his little hand to dance it around.

“You hear that? We’re gonna be spendin’ our time together tomorrow. Would you like to go on a horse ride? You like those.” You hear him tell the baby before he opens the door of the church and lets you and Apollo walk in first where you’re greeted by bright warm lights hanging from the ceiling, and a lively vibe from the community as they’re mingling and enjoying the holiday party, reminding every single person amongst the crowd how beautiful humanity can be when you’re not concerned about monsters.

“Hello, Holloways!” People greet you and Apollo and you kindly greet everyone back while making small talk with others, losing your dad and Teddy in the process, but not worrying at all because you trust your dad completely.

Eventually, after you make your rounds you both flock towards Atlas and Mia as she’s with Gail, a woman she considers her mom and a woman you’ve known for a long time now.

“Happy Birthday, Gail,” you say in a sing-song voice as you startle her before you hug her from behind.

“Thank you again,” she drops her conversation with Mia to address you. “You know it's bad manners to scare your elderly.”

“Oh,” Atlas brushes her off. “Now, now, you have the mighty spirit of a forty-year-old. Don’t worry.”

You giggle and hug her one more time before you walk away and plop yourself next to Mia and her husband.

“Thank you once again for the flowers,” Gail directs at you and Apollo. “They go very well with my dining room.”

“Specially grown for you,” you let her know sweetly. “They’re your favorite after all.”

She hums and raises her cup of alcohol to you with a half smile.

“Where’s Teddy?” Mia asks, making Apollo groan as he sits next to Gail and drapes his arm around her shoulders.

“You know it’s a miracle you even notice us anymore. That goes for everyone here.”

“Aw, are you jealous of your baby, bro?” Atlas teases him as he throws his napkin at him. “It’s not our fault your kid is way more interesting than you.”

Apollo leans forward toward his brother pretending like he’s going to retort, but instead, he grabs a handful of his fries and shoves it into his mouth, making Atlas gasp and threaten him.

“Do it again I dare you.”

Apollo chews louder and Atlas then smirks in return before he grabs his second hot dog and pushes it toward you, so you open your mouth to take a bite, but he then leans in and takes a bite from the other end, causing condiments he piled on to spill out and drop on the ground by your feet.

“Great,” you remark and stand up. “You eat like a pig.”

He shrugs. “It's just spilled condiments, Sunny-D.”

You walk around him and walk away to head to the bar and swipe four shots off the bar before you then change your course to your uncle, Maria, and your dad all gathered at one table while also greeting people you pass by.

“The party is here!” You holler and set the cups down. “Nothing like tequila on an empty stomach.”

“You’re not serious are you?” Your dad snaps at you and you take your cup while you pass Maria and your uncle their own cup so you can clink your cups.

“No,” you lie to your dad. “I know better.” You nod stiffly and share a smile with your uncle and Maria before you down your shots.

“That’s the stuff,” your uncle mumbles and sets the cup down before he beams at you. “You’re not gonna repeat your 26th birthday on me are ya Sunny?” He probes cheekily.

“Ugh,” you groan and sit back. “That headache the next day was horrible, but,” you snap your fingers. “It was fun, so we might have to save our voices to sing down the street again.”

“Getting bad hangovers is a sign of gettin’ old,” your dad breaks his silence, making you slowly drift your eyes to him to shoot him a glare—“maybe that’s a sign to quit.”

You prop your elbow on the table to rest your chin on your hand and rebuttal sassily. “Have you quit?”

He looks at you speechlessly and you scoff and lift your head off your hand, catching your son crawling on the table with his wooden horse to try and reach the shot for Apollo, but your uncle is quick to push it away.

“Ah, ah, you’ll have to wait at least 18 years for that, Teddy.”

Said baby pouts so your uncle snatches him off the table and rises off his seat to start throwing Teddy in the air and catching him, making the baby laugh with immeasurable amusement.

“Where’s your sister?” Maria now directs at you and you meet her gaze and shrug.

“I don’t know. I did not want to stop by her place because she gets mad if I rush her,” you mention and look around, noticing Jesse walking out the back with Apollo—“Jesse is here, so I imagine she’ll be here soon.”

“The last time I saw her she was in her room,” your dad says, avoiding the fact that the garage is basically her house now, not just a room. “Still not ready.”

You sigh and then take a look at him to change the subject. “Well you did your hair,” you pause and lean in to take a sniff. “And you smell nice.”

“Well those are the same clothes from this morning,” Maria snitches on your dad, making him scoff and glare at her before he grabs his cup of whisky and shakes his head in disapproval.

“Like it matters,” he grumbles.

“It truly, really does,” you say and pat his shoulders. “But it’s okay. You look…clean so we’ll be okay. Just, you know, no grumpy face. Try and look…out-going.”

He sighs and takes a longer drink.

“Me and Maria know some good ladies he can talk to,” your uncle Tommy now chimes in. “They’re here. Do you want us to introduce you?”

“No.”

“Yes,” you and your dad answer with the opposite at the same time, making Maria chuckle before she gets off her seat.

“Come on you two,” she directs at your uncle and Teddy. “Let’s go check on Benji, make sure he hasn’t taken his hat off. We’ll be back,” she tells you over her shoulder so you throw her a thumbs up and watch them take your son outside while also catching your husband and Jesse coming back inside with plates of food.

“You talk to Ellie or did you just barge in?” You now dig deeper since you’re alone for a few seconds.

“I,” your dad pauses and then continues as he seems to gather his thoughts. “Checked up on her. Saw her guitar needed some fixin’ and took it. That’s it.”

“Just,” you sigh. “Remember to give her space, okay? I know she can close herself off, but she needs it.”

“It’s that garage,” he mutters as he looks at his cup. “I just…I don’t know.”

You look at him with pity and pat his hand before you direct your attention to Jesse and Apollo as they reach the table and take the seats your uncle and Maria were at.

“Here, darling,” Apollo says as he passes you a plate. “I saw Teddy with Tommy and Maria. He didn’t even bat an eye.”

You giggle. “Yeah, wouldn’t count on it, he’s outside going toward the older kids.”

“He thinks he’s grown like them,” your dad interjects and you nod softly in agreement.

“He’d run if he could,” you add and then pass him a plate of food Jesse brought for your dad.

“Getting drunk?” You direct at Jesse before you take a bite of food.

“No, early patrol,” he says, making you and Apollo both smile teasingly before you interject when you've swallowed.

“Come on loosen up a little, Jesse-boy. It’s okay to be late once in a blue moon. It’s New Year’s Eve, we’ll understand. And if you sleep in tomorrow it’s no worries.” You try to advise him, but he shrugs as he seems unsure.

“I don’t know. People are relying on me…”

“Yes,” Apollo agrees. “But you’re also still young living in an apocalypse. It’s okay to be young and irresponsible. That’s why we’re here. They can rely on us.”

Jesse looks between you and Apollo and remains quiet but you see the wheels behind his eyes turning.

“You’re both really bad influences,” he says with his mouth full of food, making you and Apollo share an amused look.

“But they’re also right, Jesse. And that’s coming from an old man. Don’t wear yourself out so young, hm? You ain’t a dad, nor do you have a wife. Once you do then you can carry more weight on your shoulders because they’ll rely on you, but for now…breathe.”

Jesse blinks and looks down at his food before he nods softly. “Thank you, Joel.”

You smile before you continue eating, brushing aside your conversation and moving on to other insignificant matters that come up while you’re at the table.

More drinks are brought to the table by you, Apollo, his brother, and Mia, but Jesse never takes it too far. He babysits his same drink for long periods of time while your dad also doesn’t move or try to do what you told him. Which is annoying, but you also can’t force him so you leave him be, plus…he does help with Theo by taking care of him while you and Apollo go around the church mingling hand in hand.

Now you aren’t as popular as Maria, but Apollo and you do have good reputations in Jackson. You’re both very well-liked; Apollo for his dedication and work to Jackson, and you for your plays, dedication, and as Dina likes to tease, because of your relationships with the higher-ups of Jackson. It’s why you’re so sought after at the party. Eventually, Ellie arrives with Dina, but you’re stuck in conversations with people that you can’t get out of.

Some people have feedback and complaints. Some people just genuinely want to talk, and others ask about your baby and your personal life. Some even think you’re always on the clock and ask for help, but you tell them you can help them some other time.

It’s a miracle you can find an escape since you’re pulled deeper into the crowd, but when you do, you and Apollo turn your talks of a rendezvous into a reality away from the crowds and into some cold and secluded corner.

“Are you going to keep your wife warm, Mr Holloway?” You tease cheekily, making him smirk.

“I would hate to let such a pretty thing suffer any kind of discomfort,” he plays along while you lift your hands to cradle his face with your hands wrapped with your warm shawl—“so you tell me where it is you feel that bitter cold the most.”

“Why don’t you just try and find the spot and I’ll tell you if you got it, hm? Like a game.”

Apollo snickers and drags a hand away from your waist to slowly slide it up your figure and reach your jaw to cup it before leaning in to press a kiss on it.

“There?” He whispers and you draw in a heavy breath before breathing out your response.

“No.”

He smiles against your flesh, you feel his lips rise before he presses a wet kiss below your jaw. Yet that’s not the spot so you hum your disapproval, making him drag his lips by your ear.

“No, cold,” you let him know and he grips onto you tighter while gently tilting your head his way so your lips can brush against each other. Yet before he can actually mesh your lips together he moves up to kiss the tip of your nose.

“How about now?”

You giggle and shake your head, so he presses a kiss on your right cheek and then on your left before trailing his lips up to kiss your forehead. However, neither place is the right one so he lastly pulls your hand off his face to kiss the tip of each finger.

Even then he doesn’t get it right so he puts your hand back on his cheek to let you stroke his face before you drag your hand back to hold the side of his head tenderly while you look at him just the same way.

“Do you give up?” You ask and he scoffs and shakes his head before he finally feeds your craving by pressing a light feathered kiss on your lips.

“There, my darling?” He queries and meets your gaze just between his lashes.

“There,” you whisper before you can’t contain yourself a moment longer. You smash your lips against his and completely lead him into a slow heated kiss.

Any other day this would be grounds to go home and continue in the comfort of your shared room, but you’re outside now, attending a party, so you don’t tug at your clothes. You just let your hands roam, lighting up a fiery path down and up your bodies that make you forget the cold.

You may have eaten your fill when you were inside, but right now in your secluded corner, you’re devouring each other as if you’re starved, only fueling each other's need with groans and moans of satisfaction.

If you weren’t so busy with each other you’d hear the pounding of each other’s hearts running in the same hasty beat, but you’re so consumed with one another that you only know that you want more and more until…you reach a danger point and force yourselves to stop.

“Warm now?” He probes as he drags his nose across your cheek to press a kiss on your neck.

“Burning.”

Apollo smiles at your response and forces himself to pull away to face you.

“I’m afraid my fire won’t be turned off soon, but why don’t you distract me by dancing with me?” He asks as he offers you his hand.

You sigh. “Well we have to do what we have to do, don’t we?”

He smirks and before you could actually freeze you hurry back inside. Yet before you can connect at the dance floor, you go and grab just one more drink at the bar, finding none other than Jesse and Ellie.

“Hey!” You exclaim completely drunk by your passionate escape. “You’re finally here.”

Ellie leans in and sniffs you before her eyes drift past your shoulder, finding your husband before she looks back at you and quips. “And you’ve been…not here.”

You giggle as you swipe the drinks off the bar. “You’re dressed nicely and you did your hair. Good, now dance, loosen up. Right, Jesse?” You ask and look at the man you had talked to before.

“Just—sure,” he changes what he was going to say as you narrow your eyes on him. “If you are not going to make it tomorrow let someone know.”

You raise your brow and shoot him a smug look. “I’m not wasted, just drunk off…excitement and joy. I’ll be there, and so will Ellie. On time, right?”

“What was that about being young?” She retorts like a smart ass, so you've decided you’ve had enough and start backing away.

Before you can leave the pair though, Ellie takes a step toward you to uncover your shoulder. “Nice tattoo,” she says smugly.

You glance down at the sun tattoo that she drew on your shoulder and scoff before you look at her with a half smile. “Thanks. Someone dear to me drew it for me.”

She hums as she crosses her arms over her chest. “I bet she’s cool.”

You drop your smile and shake your head. “You ruined it,” you remark and turn around, hearing her laugh as you walk away and head toward the dance floor with drinks in your hand.

At first, the crowd of dancing bodies makes it hard to find Apollo, but then as if the crowd knew of your yearning souls, they part ways for you to find one another, and there in the middle of the sea of bodies, across from you on the dance floor is him, waiting for you.

The moment Apollo’s eyes land on you, his eyes grow small and get brighter as the corner of his lips lift to a bright star-struck grin. All while you slow down to a brief stop to take him in and memorize this moment as he stands there under the warm twinkling yellow lights with his charming smile that only brightens the room.

Once you’ve marked down every single inch of him you start to sway your shoulders to the music as you continue walking toward him.

Apollo laughs before he walks to you to meet you halfway and grab his drink so you can both chug it before he takes your hand to take you over and place the cups on a random table. Once they’re disposed of he guides you back to where you were, and gently places his hand on your waist, making your eyes fall on his touch before you’re surprised by his roughness when he wraps his arm around you and pulls you against him so you’re pressed against each other, leaving no space in the middle, and letting you feel each others thumping heartbeats.

“You look absolutely beautiful tonight,” he compliments you as you wrap your arms around his neck and start swaying to the music, while he strokes your cheek with his other hand before he grips onto your waist with both hands.

“I love you,” you tell him in a honey-laced voice as you look at him as if it was just you and him alone in this room.

“I love you too,” he whispers back against your lips as he presses his forehead against yours.

You smile giddily before you mold your lips against his and savor the sweet taste of his lips without caring enough to stop. You’re so lost in each other that you forget you’re in a crowd of people. You remember to dance. You just don’t pay any attention to the people around you.

And maybe it would’ve been a good idea staying oblivious, but as the saying goes, good things come to an end.

As if caught doing something you weren’t supposed to, you pull away from Apollo and gasp for air whilst gripping onto the back of his neck, while he takes heavy breaths and holds onto your waist tightly.

“Hey…it’s a family event,” you catch Seth saying and think it’s directed at you and Apollo, but when you look over you see that his attention is on Dina and Ellie.

“Sorry,” Dina says for her and Ellie, and you see them trying to walk away, but Seth keeps staring them down with his face red. “Sorry!” Dina says again but louder this time, causing you to look at Apollo for help, but he rubs your sides gently to try and assure you.

“You’re in a church,” Seth mutters as Dina grabs Ellie by the hand and tries to take her away. “Dykes.”

You gasp and drag your hand down to grab Apollo’s arm with shock, disgust, and concern.

“What the fuck did you just say?” You hear Ellie exclaim as she spins around to storm toward Seth, whilst Dina quickly turns with Ellie and takes her hand to try and pull her away before she can cause a bigger commotion. Not like she should stop Ellie from showing Seth a lesson.

“Ellie, no. Ellie!”

You grip tighter onto Apollo and look at him with concern, but he’s focused on Seth and Ellie and starts to pull away to head toward them. Albeit before he can reach Seth, suddenly from the crowd comes your dad and before you know it he shoves Seth down so hard, that the old man drops hard on the ground, causing everyone who wasn’t aware of what was going on to gawk now, whilst you use both hands to hold onto your husband and look at your dad completely bewildered by his action.

“Get the hell outta here,” your dad orders Seth while the crowd murmurs and Maria quickly comes over to pick Seth off the ground.

“Seth, let's…let’s take a walk. Come on. Let’s go.”

You look over at Ellie, missing your dad's glance and noticing how horrified and shocked she looks over what happened before your dad steals her attention.

“Are you okay?” You hear him ask her, making her finally look over at him.

“What is wrong with you?” Ellie snaps at your dad, making Apollo grab your arm and start to gently caress it as you look over at the scene completely…distraught.

“I don’t need your fucking help,” Ellie continues to sneer and you feel it deep in your heart, all the strings tug, and not just for your dad, but for her too.

“Right,” your dad nods after he takes a glance at the gawking crowd, and then moves his head in your direction, but doesn’t dare meet your eyes, instead he just takes leave in the silence.

You would go after Ellie first, but you know her well. She’s too upset to talk to right now, so you let her and Dina disappear from the crowd and think about one person instead.

“I should go talk to him,” you whisper and look at Apollo.

He nods as he holds your gaze. “Yeah, that’ll be good. We should take Theo to bed anyway.”

“We can come back,” you try to offer a solution for quite an early leave, but he grabs your shoulders to gently rub them.

“It’s okay, sweetheart, I’m okay. I'd rather spend the rest of the night with you at home,” he assures you before he leans in and presses a kiss on your forehead.

“Okay, thank you,” you offer him before you stroke his chin and offer him a smile before you press an appreciative kiss on his lips, making a faint smile appear on his lips.

“Let’s go get Teddy,” you murmur and walk off the dance floor to find your Uncle Tommy with Theo.

“I’m going to talk to him. I’ll talk to her tomorrow,” you let your uncle know as you take your son from him. “Goodnight Uncle Tommy, and happy new year.” You say softly as you offer him a short embrace and a small kiss on his cheek.

“Goodnight and happy new year, Sunny.” He redirects before he offers Apollo the same, and vice versa, letting you then leave the party with your spark snuffed out compared to when you first got here.

Even so, you still stop by your dad's house and actually catch him on his porch strumming a guitar.

“I’ll see you at home, my love,” Apollo whispers.

“Yeah, I’ll see you then,” you redirect and watch him leave with Theo for a few seconds before you look over at your dad, noticing his averting his gaze, but even then, you still go and join him on the porch behind a heater, choosing to lean over the porch railing while he stays seated in his chair with his guitar.

“Teddy asleep?” He asks, making you glance at your path home and nod gently.

“He’s getting there,” you let him know and finally hear his wooden chair creak as he gets up to walk over to your side without adding anything on any matter. He just puts the guitar down against the railing and looks out at the scenery in front of his house whilst you let out a deep breath and see your breath form in a puff of smoke in front of you, feeling no point in delaying why you stopped by. He knows it too even if he pretends not to.

“You know,” you sigh and gently hit your thigh with your balled hand before you cross your arms over the railing again and look at him, noticing him pretending to be busy moving the heater between your legs—“I’m going to say it because I’m almost thirty, what you did just now in that party was stupid. I respect what you did. I really do because I didn’t defend her at that moment, but there were other ways to defend her.” You throw out bluntly, but he still doesn’t meet your gaze. His eyebrows pinch together and his lips droop ahead, but he doesn’t show you what he feels.

“I know. Don’t you think I know that,” he says agreeing with you. “When I saw her face I knew it was wrong, but…I don’t regret it. I would do it for you too.”

You nod stiffly and blink to look ahead. “Yes, and I appreciate it but you need to stop trying to do what you think is right and think about how she would want you to respond.”

Finally from the corner of your eyes, you see your dad turn his head your way, so you look over and see his eyebrows knit together as he looks at you with conflict before it breaks and a mist begins to cloud his eyes.

“I missed out on ten years of your life because I left you,” he brings up and obviously tries to fight the quiver from being heard in his voice as he clears his throat. “Because you were mad at me. I don’t want ten years to pass with her.”

You swallow thickly and nod softly in comprehension before you narrow your gaze and become blunt once again. “Yes, that’s why I’m telling you that you need to think about her. If you had thought about what I wanted those years ago, you would have given me a choice and told me what you felt. You wouldn’t have abandoned me without a word and made me torment myself for ten years as I asked myself what was wrong with me to cause you to leave.”

Your dad scoffs in defeat and drops his head to sniffle.

“When you took Ellie from that hospital you just thought about yourself. You were selfish,” you’re not ashamed to say because, in more words or less, it’s an argument he’s already heard from you. “I-I understand why you did it. You love her, and I love her too, but at that moment you needed to give her a choice and either fight your way out or respected her choice if it’s what she wanted. Now, well,” you scoff and shake your head. “We’re at a point of no return.”

Your dad sniffles again and then slowly looks out before he looks at you as if his eyes weren’t just watery and he was fighting every fiber in his body not to cry.

“And because we’re at that point of no return you either come to terms with what you did, admit that you acted selfishly, or…” you trail off and let him fill in the blanks because you know he knows what will happen if he doesn’t see the things the way Ellie sees them.

“And if she doesn’t…forgive me when I admit I was wrong…then what?” He asks with frustration and also a feeling of helplessness.

“Then,” you sigh and briefly spare a glance at him before you look down as you feel a tug at your heart. “You watch her live her life from afar. You can’t force yourself in her life if she doesn’t want you in it.”

Your dad fists his hands so you gently place yours on top of his and offer him some reassurance. “She will forgive you though. Just let her come to you when she’s ready, you can’t force that, so that means stop being so overprotective and talking to people behind her back. She has to navigate the world herself. If she needs help she will ask, if she doesn’t then that’s when you step in. She can be stubborn.”

He scoffs softly in agreement, and you wrap your hand around his, making his clenched hand soften to hold your hand back as he meets your gaze with unsureness now.

“Just be present and come to terms with what you did because regret or not there’s no going back to that day...” you trail off softly and let out a deep breath to draw out all the tension that had built over that conversation before you offer him a sweet smile.

“I'm going to head home now, okay? Good night and happy new year, Daddy.”

He turns to face you and before you can leave he wraps his arms around you to pull you for an embrace. “Happy New Year, baby. I love you.”

You hug him tightly and don’t fret to say those words back. “I love you too.”

You pat his back and he rubs yours before you steal one more glance at each other and then you depart from his porch, offering him only one last thing. “I’ll see ya tomorrow!”

“Yep.”

You hug your shawl tighter against you and basically trot away to try and reach your warm house quicker.

However, as you’re walking away from your dad's house you cross paths with Ellie and stop dead in your tracks before her, noticing that upset look still clinging onto her, so you offer her a warm smile as she holds your gaze speechlessly.

“Happy New Year, Ellie…and,” you pause and can’t help your smirk as you think about what might have caused such a commotion.

It’s not like it’s hard to guess why Seth said what he did.

“You got the girl,” you tease, breaking that frown into a quick and faint smile. “Let’s talk about it tomorrow. Good night.”

She draws out a small breath and breaks her silence. “Goodnight.”

You offer her one last smile before you walk away and head home for the night.

.

.

.

.

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A/N- Ahh what a chapter!

Tagged- @slut-f0r-u @star-wars-lover @maplecohen @givemylovetoall @itzagothamcitysiren @sammy-13 @beloved-reblogger @emiriia @rues-daya @sunfairyy @littleshadow17 @mcu-starwars @bigtuffswordboy @riaqiax @dheet @queenofthekill @joliettes @d4rno @hardbeingcasual @rana030 @pedropascalluvr41 @ahoyyharrington @beaniebeensbaby201 @maeneedsabreak @maelartasch @adristyles @daughterofthequeen @alastorhazbin @sunsumonner @khaylin27 @hypatia93 @hummusxx @v4mpyk1tten @1donoow @your-shifting-gurl @g4ns3y @izzzzy-the-amazing @aphr0d1teh @lovelyygirl8 @ivy-taylorsversion @mmkkzz @avitute

[scionshtola]

sorry to always be complaining but it's just so. meh. feeling when i want to be writing or gposing but nothing is sparking enough interest for me to actually do it

[theorist-fox]

Can I interest you in some silly sex with Simon? 🧎🏻‍♀️‍➡️

18+

Word count: 1k.

CW: nothing really. Just silly sex. Just giggling sex. Just I-need-to-give-this-man-some-humanity sex. Simon is ticklish and you find out, that's the plot.

Masterlist 🦊

You look delectable straddling his hips.

Naked and soft, plump tits sitting prettily in his hands. His thumbs swipe idly around your perked nipples as you ride him slowly, early morning sun peeking through the curtains and lapping at your skin. What a way to wake up, what a sight.

He stares at your lips and how they part for him—something he still has to get used to, though he probably never truly will. How dulcet does his name sound if it’s your voice whispering it, how beautiful your eyes when they take in his face.

Soft hands are pressed on his chest for leverage, and you’re treating him with a view he keeps pinned to the forefront of his brain—gliding your cunt until you’re chock-full of him, stroking yourself until you’re shivering.

He likes it when he’s on top, sure. He’s used to taking the lead and orchestrating every detail, in and out of the job. 

But when you allow him to sit back and take it? Hell, sign him up. He’d do it every day. Especially when it’s this lazy sex here, in which you’re canting your hips to cum before he does, giving him the blissful chance of feeling you clench around him when he's still hard. 

Goosebumps rise under your nails as they graze down his chest and brush his stomach. Your hands wander blindly on his belly, then his sides, as you clock his eyes with your heavy ones, panting softly, idly—my beautiful, beautiful girl.

But then you inadvertently brush his ribs, and he stiffens—even squirms, and your movements come to a halt.

You blink as conscience returns to you slowly, and the room sinks into tense silence. His cock twitches inside of you when you tilt your head inquisitively, squinting your eyes.

Experimentally, you brush your fingertips against his ribs again, and his biceps flatten to his sides, trapping your hands.

Your eyes widen, and his do the same.

“Don’t.”

You gasp, “Oh my God.”

“Darling, no.” He warns, but you’ve clearly made up your mind already.

Your lips are curled in a smile that promises mischief, and he can only give up, sit back, and count his losses.

“Darling, yes.”

Simon feels your fingers wiggle under the tight press of his arms, but no matter his strength, they're seemingly useless against that playful resolve you're displaying.

His cock is still embarrassingly hard inside you, and Simon reckons it won't soften any time soon. You don’t seem eager to get off him either, thus prolonging the torture with each tiny movement you make.

He inhales sharply and fights tooth and nail to school his expression into neutrality. His eyes are narrowed, and his jaw is locked tight. The only thing giving him away is the flush of his cheeks, getting pinker by the second because he refuses to open his mouth to breathe a much-needed lungful of air. Knowing that if he would, he'd bark a laugh that would proclaim you as the winner of this fight.

He would never.

You roll your hips, then—cheap trick. He unravels with a shaky breath, and his biceps give out enough for you to slip your hands away.

And then, he knows he's done for.

“Cut it out.” He barks, trying to sound stern and miserably failing. He knows because you're laughing even harder.

Your fingers feel like tiny bugs crawling up his sides, and they make his breath catch in his throat.

“Never.” You say, with a grin that scrunches your nose. A smile that would normally make his heart throb, but right now just makes him wish he were a lesser man so he could throttle you.

“Fuckin’-“

You chuckle.

You evil little cunt.

Resistance lasts a few more seconds before he bursts.

It’s not a full laugh that leaves him; more of a wheeze that makes you chortle like a wicked witch. His chest heaves as your fingers frantically tickle his sides. Tries to get you off him by shaking his hips, but that only makes the two of you falter and moan, and then chuckle and catch your breaths.

His shoulders shake in a breathless, choking laugh that pitches upward as you continue with your assault (yes, assault—he is not being dramatic), eyes veiled with tears of frustration and mirth. He shrieks when your hands travel under his armpits—the sound makes you giggle in a way that would have him melt. 

“That laugh’s lovely, baby.” You say with a smarmy grin he wishes he could wipe with a kiss, hands unrelenting against his sides. “Sound like a kettle whistling.”

He tries to glower and push you off, but you’re surprisingly strong when you’re focused. Right now, your only goal is to apparently make him hate you—he'd rather be held at gunpoint than being forced to hold in a laugh that makes his stomach hurt.

Simon now looks shockingly harmless, with his cheeks flushed bright red and his voice an octave too high—wouldn't look dangerous if he tried.

“Tea ready, yet?” You add, batting your lashes, because why not rub salt into the already embarrassing wound marring his pride.

It’s that unfathomably stupid joke that finally makes Simon crack. He barks out a laugh that bubbles up his throat, rippling through his stomach so suddenly that you bounce above him. Your own laugh follows soon after, because each time you manage to steal one from him, your heart vibrates with loving triumph.

But still—he is Simon Riley, isn’t he? Member of Task Force 141. Lieutenant in the UK Special Forces, SAS. The Ghost. There is some pride in there, one he'd like to keep intact.

He tries to recollect his breath, sniffling, and his arms shoot out to wrap around your waist. He rolls onto his side, taking you with him.

It’s then that you find yourself in a position of utter disadvantage, on your back with your big brute of a boyfriend holding you down. You’re wide-eyed and still smiling with barely contained giggles, and he’d be lying if he said it doesn't make his heart soar.

Sure, he’s panting, still proper flushed and apple-cheeked, with shivers wrecking his spine and unshed tears in his eyes—but he takes great pride in having won yet another fight (again, not overreacting at all, if you ask him).

He grabs your wrists and pins them above your head.

You fix him with a look. “Simon, no.”

Before you can add more to your complaint, he rams his cock into you until your chest stutters, your lips mouthing around a shaky breath he drinks dry with a wet kiss.

He fucks you into the mattress, then—once, twice, until the remnants of laughter vanish from your face and you’re trembling in bliss, eyes rolled back under heavy eyelids.

He places a sloppy kiss down to your collarbone.

“Simon, yes.”

[callmecoke]

Sugar Baby headcanons: The type of 'Photos' they enjoy

cw: Mention of sex work (sugar baby/daddy dynamic), Sharing nudes, Poly 141 x gender neutral reader. description of fondling, masterbation, dom and sub similiar dynamic, vague allusion to spanking, teasing, Very NSFW!

After you sent them the first photo, you opened a whole new door to financial opportunities. Sure, you could normally send just about any regular photo and get a perfectly good amount of money (and praise). However, sexy pictures of you seemed to double the amount you’d normally get. So, of course, you’d capitalise on that, especially with the men who have been incredibly generous to you. Over time, you’ve even learnt how the individual boys like their photos and thus can cater when needed.

Gaz absolutely LOVES seeing you oiled up and naked for him. Especially when he gets to see those ass cheeks of yours. He loves how the body oil makes your skin glow vibrantly, how the light reflects off your skin, and how wetness defines every crevice and little detail on your body. He’s constantly talking about how much he wants to touch you, how he’d rub the oil over your uncovered breasts, groping and pulling at every bit of flesh you’d let him touch. How he’d pull your ass cheeks apart and let his skilled and defined fingers rub over your swollen and begging hole. God, he wished he could touch you.

Prices will pay for just about any small item you might want if you tell him you want it. Do you plan on going for a little shopping spree? Here’s 500 hundred, and an extra 50 for the lunch. He wouldn’t want you to starve and tire yourself out with all that walking. There is a bit of a catch, though. Anything you buy, you have to send him pictures of. And sure, he loves the normal sfw pictures you send. But nothing gets him harder than receiving a little picture of you clad in the new lacy undergarments you bought with his well-earned money. How you shyly present yourself to the camera, expensive fabric adorning your pretty flushed skin. The little twinkle in your big round eyes, silently seeking his approval. And oh, does he approve. He approves so much that he’ll describe in detail how he’d have that nice underwear dangling from your ankle as he bent you over his knee.

With Johnny, well, Johnny is an appreciator of just about any flash of skin you’d let him put his eyes on. Chest, ass, thighs, half-naked, fully naked, an inch of exposed ankle, doesn’t matter. He’ll take it, and he’ll be grateful for it. However, he’d be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy it when you make him beg for his prize. You like to play little teasing games with him, sending him photos of you with your hands on the hem of your shirt, gently pulling it up. Enough to show your midriff, but never enough to entirely pull over your head and reveal the delicate beauty of your bare chest. With this one photo, you’d have him drooling like a dog and begging like one too. He’d try and bargain, offering up just about anything to get you to take the shirt off and show him your perky nipples. And I mean anything. You want money? He’s got money. You can take as much as you want, all of it even. He’ll beg if you want to if you’re into making a grown man paw at your feet. Whatever you want, you can have; just please, please, put the poor man out of his misery and let him get a peek of those gorgeous tits. 

Now, Simon, he’s a little trickier to figure out. He rarely makes comments or sends you messages, only using single-word responses on rare occasions. It’s challenging to get a read on him. So, instead of guessing what he wanted, you decided to just…ask. You quickly realised that having you utterly subservient to his demands was his biggest turn-on. He’d give you specific instructions detailing exactly how he wants you. Legs spread, sitting up on your bed, no clothing ‘cept for underwear (Of HIS choosing. Something thin and sluty, where he can see the whole fullness of your weeping sex behind the small fabric). He wants you to arch your back; show it to him, luv. He wants your hand on your pretty aching arousal, playing with yourself for his entertainment like his good little pet. You find he's a lot more talkative when you let him order you around like this. He’s more than happy to reward obedience, especially with such a good, obedient pet like yourself.

[kianamaiart]

I just wanted to tell you that I love idwtbamg and am especially blown away by the character designs for aika and zira!!!!!! their colour palettes compliment each other really well and are soft while still having some contrast and I would love to know how you came up with the designs or if you don't feel like sharing that, your favourite parts of their designs and what you're most proud of? Good luck with the pilot, by the way!!! ^^

Aw thank you so much! Character design was initially what I wanted to do when entering the industry so I love whenever I'm able to do it~

I talk about my process for picking colors here a bit!

Design process under the cut (loooong post ahead)

Whenever I'm designing a cast of characters I always start with the main character and build off of them. I started specifically with Aika's normal girl design. I wanted a star theme, and the star hair was the first thing I knew I needed. With her hair being the most eye catching and important part of her design, I wanted to make sure whatever else she had going on wasn't gonna distract from it too much. So I went for a more top heavy, but simple look with a big tshirt, small black pants. Aika was initially fully blonde but the stark black pants was starting to pull the eye. That gave me the idea to use the stark black in her hair (for the bottom half)! Made her hair even more eye catching and highlighted the star pigtails in a nice way.

For her magical girl design, I wanted to make it feel over the top and overwhelming to contribute visually why Aika wouldn't want to be a magical girl. Big poofy dress, ribbons poking out everywhere for a crazy silhouette and tall, tall platforms. I also wanted to give her longer hair in this form so I went with goddess locs! I was able to do an easy shorthand with it (long thick strands with lil curls at the end) I like the kinda biblically accurate angel look she has. My favorite part of this design was the ribbons in her hair that make the star pigtails look like shooting stars heehee

With Zira I knew I wanted her to be opposite to Aika. So sticking with the space thing, I gave her a moon motif and that was my jumping off point. With Aika having high pigtails, I decided to give Zira low pigtails and give them a vaguely crescent shape (like crescent moons get it?). Continuing with the opposites thing, I wanted to make Zira's design bottom heavy as opposed to Aika's top heavy one, and also color-wise, go on the opposite side of the color wheel from yellow for its complimentary color, purple! I didn't want Zira to feel too stylish (she's a loser after all) but also didn't wanna make her design ugly. I tried toeing the line of out of style but lowkey trendy with the grungy skirt, jeans combo. Also went with the stark black shirt under the tshirt to lean harder into the 2000s look. On top of that it helped tie her design to Aika's more (this is where I decided the stark black was gonna be an essential part of the design language of this show). My favorite part of her design for me is the mangled ends of her pants. It's a small detail but I think it says a lot about her as a character (she drags her feet, she's a little careless, kinda messy, etc.)

Hoshi is star. There's not much more to their design haha. I did give them wings to mirror Aika's dress ribbons. With their human design though, I just knew I wanted to make sure that they'd be able to make a star shape with their silhouette. Thus the hoodie and stubby limbs. Gave them the stark black pants (again at this point, it's part of the design language of this show). I tossed around the idea of giving them eyes that matched more with Aika and Zira, but it just didn't look like Hoshi so I stuck with the same face in their star design and I just thought that was funny hehe. My favorite part of Hoshi's design is just the overall fact that I managed to make them look like a star in their human form still haha

Eclipse was the hardest design for me. You would not believe how long it took me to decide whether I wanted to make him a boy or a girl. Eclipse was also gonna be named Void (and DeVoid was gonna be Eclipse) but it didn't feel quite right. I knew I wanted him to ALSO be opposite from Aika, but in a different way that Zira is. Looking at it that way helped me land on the name Eclipse because I thought it'd be fun to give both Zira and him moon motifs (as Aika's love interest and alleged love interest respectively). Similar to Zira I wanted to have purple be in his design to contrast the yellow in Aika's design. Due to his name now being Eclipse, I figured going dark with his design would make the most sense but my friend/roommie Bri @/ghostbri (who is a professional painter/color designer) suggested going pastel instead and it worked perfectly. It matched his personality and also plays on the fact that he cares more about theatrics and aesthetics than actual villainy. He completely misses the point of being the servant of darkness. He's heavily inspired by Tuxedo Mask. I wanted to make it feel like he saw a cool character once in a tv show and he decided to make it his whole persona. So he's got the suit, he's got the cape and he's got the mask. My favorite part of his design is his cape, intended to also have a crescent moon shape but then also have that stark black on the inside so his silhouette really pops against it. It's funny bc it ended up being like a reverse eclipse where the light is blocking out the dark.

DeVoid was the easiest for me to come up with the design for LMAO. Like obviously. I wanted to make her feel slick but prickly but also slightly over the top like a lot of old school magical girl villains. I thought it'd be a difficult balance to strike but it actually wasn't too bad! I gave her a sort of form fitting cocktail dress and at this point the stark black was a must so it worked out that the "void" character would just be in that all black look. It really helped her feel slick like I wanted (also gave her the slicked back hair for this reason). To give her some edge, I gave her the giant pointy shoulder pads, giant pointy horns, pointy ears, sharp nails and bat wings! Oh also worth mentioning she's the one main cast character I didn't use Aika as a jumping off point for. I designed her to look good next to Eclipse since they'd be the ones interacting the most. I made her wings white to contrast with her black dress (opposite to how Eclipse has a black cape but then mostly white outfit). To ensure that her design wasn't too dark and that her arms would read against her body, I gave her those bright silver bracelets~ While her design was easy for me to come up with, my god figuring out what color to make her hair was killing me. Tbh I was avoiding pink/red like the plague. I didn't want her to look toooo much like Jessie Team Rocket LOL. I tried white, I tried purple, I tried a more pastel pink but none of them worked well in a lineup with the rest of the characters. Bri helped talked me through all this haha. Pink/red worked the best especially there was no pink/red in the entire lineup. The Jessie influence is still there but I feel like she looks different enough! Favorite part of her design is her big ass horns)

Finally Miss! Miss was an interesting case because I designed her as I was storyboarding the pilot. She was intended to be an incidental character that we'd only randomly see once in a while. She had a veeery generic teacher design in my first pass but then as I was hiring VAs I got the idea to cast Michele Knotz to play her and that was enough for my brain to start going and come up with a backstory for her and a role that could tie in with the rest of the cast in a more meaningful way. Because of this, I designed Miss to the voice I imagined Michele would use for her. She does a great groggy and tired voice so I gave her those tired eyes, she has a darker color palette, her posture's a little more sluggish, etc. Her design still felt bland in the board so I gave her a couple piercings which helped. But then! The stark black! I gave her the half dyed hair which worked phenomenally and is probably my favorite part of her design. It leans into the tired feel (too tired to dye her roots) and also was a nice way to get the black in her design without just having to give her black pants or a black shirt or something. I'd only figured out her color palette way later and after recording Michele. The VA announcement image was the first time I'd fully drawn and colored Miss. I went with green since there was no green in the lineup! Also green's my favorite color so I had to.

PHEW that's it! Hope it was an interesting read and look into my brain.

[covenofagatha]

ok after the FFF post i think we now need your thought on reader teasing agatha during no nut november.

maybe first they make a bet about whether agatha can even make it through no nut november, and of course agatha is like what do u mean i can’t do it? and so she takes on the challenge.

you then start waking agatha up to the sounds of you fucking yourself with a dildo or smth and she already wants to quit.

you then proceed to tease her nonstop every day, and of course it’s harder for agatha because november has a few more days than february

- 🥕

Well it is only fair that reader gets a little payback for all of Agatha's teasing

You've been waiting ever since finger free February for this and you've been planning

It's a few days before November starts and you casually bring it up to Agatha over dinner. She scoffs it off at first, but then you appeal to her competitive nature: "Oh come on, mommy, you don't think you can last? I did. Guess you can't, though. Such a shame. You're just too desperate for me, aren't you? Can't control yourself at all?"

She takes the bait immediately and is outraged that you would even imply that she wouldn't be able to, and accepts

You two have the most sex you've ever had in the next few days, courtesy of Agatha trying to get out as many orgasms as she can

The first few days of November pass and you're her perfect baby, only making a few dirty remarks here and there and only attempting to brush her cock through her pants a few times

Agatha gets lulled into a false sense of security and thinks that maybe it won't be that hard (pun intended) after all

Until the next morning when she wakes up to hear wet squelching sounds and rolls over to find you with a dildo buried up to the hilt in your cunt, panting

But not just any dildo, no, the one you made with the penis molding kit that is an exact silicone replica of her cock (purposefully for this month - but she doesn't need to know)

So not only is she watching you fuck yourself with it, but she also now has the memory of you on your knees in the shower in front of her, blowing her to a full erection, and then stroking the molding powder over her cock to make the toy

"Fuck, mommy, your cock feels so good inside me," you moan, pumping it fast inside you, and Agatha is instantly hard as a rock, the few days without an orgasm finally catching up to her. She starts to hump the air and wonders how embarrassing it would be if she didn't even make it a week into it

She barely avoids cumming untouched when you orgasm all over the toy

Thus begins you starting to tease her for real

You've never been a big banana fan, but you certainly are now and you make eye contact with her every morning as you slide as much of it as you can take down your throat before gagging (which only makes her harder)

You give her your best "fuck me" eyes every night as you hold a vibrator to your clit, hips bucking, while you beg for her to put her cock inside you. "It's okay, mommy, you can just stop before you cum and it won't count," you tell her, but you both know that the second she gets inside you, she'll blow her load instantly

When she sits at her desk doing work, you saunter over in nothing but lingerie and straddle her lap, claiming you just want to be close to her, but that doesn't stop you from grinding on her rock hard cock through her pants while she grits her teeth and turns red as a tomato

It gets to the point that she's pretty sure if you were to touch her cock with your bare skin, she would fail

"Only four days left," you say cheerily and she grumbles something incoherently. She's been irritated and a little quick-tempered and you love it.

"It's not fair," she says. "November is two days longer than February."

You mockingly pout and suck on a lollipop. "Oh, poor mommy. But just think, on December first, you can fuck me again. God, I can't wait to have your cock inside me. I love when you twitch and pulse and throb and then fill me up with your cum and leaks out of me."

Agatha has to leave the room with a whimper because she's so painfully hard and doesn't trust herself to look at you without cumming right now

That night, you're laying next to her in bed, idly playing with your clit and sliding your fingers into your cunt every now and then. Agatha is making a pointed effort not to look, but you can see how tense she is. It comes to a breaking point when you push your wet fingers into her mouth and she groans before getting up, positioning herself between your legs, and hauling your cunt into her mouth

It's the first time she's touched you since October and you can't help yourself from making louder noises than you're used to because of how good it feels and you're so lost in pleasure that you don't even notice how she's started to grind against the bed

You're so close to an orgasm when she suddenly freezes and pulls back with a strangled sound. Her eyes are wide with panic, face red, and you can see her hips rutting

"Fuck fuck fuck," she chants and a thrill runs through you before her head drops down to rest against your stomach with a groan

When she flops over onto her back, you can see a wet stain on the front of her boxers and you laugh

"Guess since you lost, you can just go ahead and fuck me now," you sigh. "No point in waiting a few more days."

Agatha can't even be mad about it because at least her torture is over

You never fail to remind her that you made it longer than she did

[eshieslovemaze]

Wildest Dreams | taehyung

summary: a silent love, a stage, and a final chance—will your role as juliet to taehyung's romeo make him finally see you as you've always wished?

pairing: taehyung x reader

genre: college romance, unrequited love (or is it?), lots of pining

word count: 3.4k

note: yay! finally posting something here that i'm truly proud of writing, hehe. cross-posted on my wattpad, but this version is newer, and thus, more polished. hope you guys like it!

🐚🤍

Not too long ago, I caught my first glimpse of you in the college corridors—laughing, carefree, the golden afternoon light catching in your hair. You were with your friends, teasing, joking, your laughter spilling into the air like a melody.

"Yah, Kim Taehyung! Laugh harder at my dad joke!" one of them quipped, and that was when I learned your name.

That moment was the first time you wrote your name on the walls of my heart.

We were all freshmen then. On the first day, I followed you into the classroom, only to bump into your back. Embarrassed, I mumbled an apology, but you simply smiled—soft, kind, forgiving. That smile lingered in my mind the entire day, its warmth spreading through my chest like an untamed wildfire. Miyoung teased me, of course. "Blushing already? He only said ‘it’s fine,’" she had giggled.

Three years have passed since that day. We've grown, changed in ways both subtle and profound. But one thing has remained constant—my feelings for you, deepening with every stolen glance, every lingering moment. While I kept to my small circle, you flourished, your effortless charm and talent making you a campus favorite.

I had always been your silent admirer, loving you from a distance, content in the quiet ache of unspoken longing. But when you started dating Choi Hayoon, I knew I had lost whatever chance I never truly had. She was beautiful—inside and out. Together, you were the ‘perfect pair,’ the couple everyone adored, and it was fair to all, even to me.

But oh, how unfair it felt to my heart, which grew heavier each day you weren’t mine.

I never uttered a word about my feelings to anyone except Miyoung, who held my secrets like delicate glass. "Don't be sad, sweetie. Maybe he isn't really ‘the one’ for you," she had said once, trying to comfort me. But how could that be true when my heart, my mind, my very soul unraveled into chaos at the mere thought of you?

I had forced myself to my quiet admiration. I had kept my emotions in check.

Until this month began.

The annual fest was fast approaching, and this time, it was our turn to organize it. After three years of being a nameless face in the crowd, I decided to step forward—just once.

I signed up for the drama.

And that was the unofficial beginning of us.

To say I was surprised when I saw you in the auditorium would be an understatement. You stood beside Professor Lee, talking about taking part in Romeo and Juliet. Hayoon was by your side, and the whispers among the gathered students began immediately.

"If Taehyung and Hayoon play Romeo and Juliet, even Shakespeare would rise from his grave!" someone mused, earning a wave of agreement.

I only smiled—a bittersweet curve of my lips, careful, controlled. Miyoung stood beside me, her presence grounding, but I didn’t let her see the quiet turmoil within me.

The auditions were brief—a two-minute performance to determine our roles. Miyoung and I recited a passage from Twelfth Night, our voices weaving through the words with practiced ease. The professor seemed pleased.

Then came your turn. You and Hayoon performed a scene from The Merchant of Venice, and though your skills were undeniable, hers fell short. Your immaculate skills landed you the role of Romeo instantly. When Professor Lee announced that she wouldn’t be cast due to her lack of experience in acting, murmurs spread like ripples in the crowd. Miyoung couldn't make it into the cast, too.

I didn’t know how to feel. I wasn’t sure if I should feel anything at all.

But Hayoon, ever the angel, only smiled, congratulating you. "I knew I wouldn't make it," she admitted, unbothered. "I was never into acting anyway."

You chuckled, affectionate yet easy, as if everything had fallen into place exactly as it should.

Then, the unexpected happened.

"Y/N," Professor Lee called, his eyes twinkling as he looked at me. "You will be playing Juliet."

The room buzzed with murmurs as I stepped forward. I was an unfamiliar name, a quiet presence in the background. But as Professor Lee handed me the script with an encouraging smile, my heart pounded for an entirely different reason.

I was to be your Juliet.

You approached me afterward, flashing that signature boxy smile. “Hey, Y/N! Guess we’re partners now. Let’s get to know each other more—for the sake of our chemistry, of course.”

I nodded with a nervous smile, exchanging phone numbers.

I really became your Juliet that day, didn’t I?

The first day of rehearsal.

Professor Lee had shortened the original script, ensuring the play wrapped up in an hour. My adrenaline was pumping through every vein—excitement and nerves swirling together in a chaotic rhythm.

And then, you walked into the auditorium.

Calm yet excited, your presence seemed to brighten the entire space. The moment your eyes landed on me, you flashed that signature boxy smile of yours. Just like that, my nerves ebbed away, replaced by a quiet, unexpected sense of calm. By the time I managed to smile back, you were already standing in front of me—grinning, effortlessly charming.

"Y/N-ah! How are you today?"

The nickname made my heart stutter. Did you just…?

"Pretty good," I replied, probably too fast, probably too eager.

We talked about the drama and script until Professor Lee called us to take our positions on stage.

The rehearsal began with an introductory passage, the curtains rising directly to our first scene—Romeo and Juliet meeting for the first time. It took me a moment to adjust to you in this new light. Your acting was too good, too natural. The way you looked at Juliet… at me—was it just part of the act, or something more? My mind spiraled with thoughts I had no right to entertain. If we were a couple, would you look at me the same way? Was this just incredible acting, or was I foolishly reading too much into it?

Minutes passed as we moved through the script, until Professor Lee directed, "Now, Romeo has to kiss Juliet."

My stomach dropped.

He reassured us that it was okay if the first attempt felt awkward, but we needed to work on making it look natural. You nodded without hesitation. I did too, though my heartbeat was anything but steady.

For the demo scene, I stood in my place, watching you approach me—slow, deliberate. Your gaze held mine, unwavering, and when you reached me, your palm cradled my jawline with a tenderness that felt… real.

Too real.

I barely registered my hands settling on your shoulders before our lips met. A soft touch, fleeting, yet enough to leave my pulse racing. My eyes fluttered shut instinctively, but before I could even process the moment, it was over. Professor Lee’s voice cut through the silence.

"Perfect."

We pulled away, exchanging shy smiles. Heat rushed to my cheeks, and from the way your eyes twinkled with amusement, I knew you had noticed. A chuckle bubbled from your lips, effortless and warm.

And just like that, rehearsal was over.

You left after bidding everyone goodbye, and I followed suit. But as I stepped out of the auditorium, my heart stilled at the sight before me.

You were hugging her.

Hayoon.

The way you smiled at her, the way she leaned into you—it was effortless, natural, unshakable.

A hollow ache settled in my chest, heavy and unrelenting. I wasn’t sure why it hurt so much, but one thing became clear in that moment.

Maybe you were my Romeo, but I was never your Juliet.

Heaving a sigh, I made my way toward the auditorium for rehearsal. It had been a little over two weeks, and the excitement surrounding the fest was growing stronger with each passing day. Acting in the drama with you by my side only intensified my feelings—feelings I knew would eventually hurt me.

But still, I chose to risk it all.

Even if I couldn't have you, at least there was a chance you’d remember me.

As I stepped inside, my eyes immediately found you—smiling, giggling, flipping through the script with her. My insides twisted. It was a feeling I refused to name, but I knew it all too well.

Jealousy.

Sensing my presence, you looked up and waved with that easygoing smile of yours. I forced my lips into a smile and waved back, mirroring your greeting. As I walked toward you, Hayoon beamed at me, her voice bright.

"Hey, Y/N-liet!"

I chuckled at the nickname.

I had nothing against her. She was a genuine sweetheart, after all. And yet, the mere sight of you with her made my heart ache in ways I wished it wouldn’t.

Moments later, Professor Lee entered, instructing us to take our positions. Hayoon bid us good luck before leaving, and soon, the rehearsal began.

Two weeks.

Two weeks of stolen glances, shared dialogues, lingering touches, and rehearsed kisses. Yet, I never got used to them.

How could I?

This play—this act—was affecting me more than I wanted to admit. My mind was a whirlwind of thoughts, emotions tangled in knots I couldn't undo.

When rehearsal ended, I left the auditorium, craving space to breathe. My feet carried me to the back garden of the school—my quiet escape, a place usually untouched by others. Under the shade of an old tree, I sat, resting my back against the rough trunk, closing my eyes.

But even then, I couldn't escape you.

Because when I closed my eyes, all I saw was you.

Your gaze, vivid and consuming.

I don’t know how much time passed before a familiar voice pulled me from my thoughts.

"Are you all right? You looked a bit restless during rehearsal."

My eyes fluttered open to find you standing there, concern laced in your deep voice.

I mustered a small smile. "I'm fine. Just needed a little peace."

You nodded in understanding before lowering yourself beside me, your back resting against the same tree, our shoulders brushing. A comfortable silence settled between us, one that felt oddly intimate.

Then, you spoke again.

And somehow, words flowed effortlessly between us. One topic led to another, and before I knew it, we were lost in a conversation that stretched endlessly, unraveling parts of each other we hadn't known before.

When it was time to leave, you insisted on walking me home. I hesitated, thinking of her, but you assured me it was fine. "She left early today—half-day," you said with a casual shrug.

As we walked, our hands brushed more times than I could count. Each accidental touch sent a rush of warmth through me, making my cheeks burn. And then—

You held my hand.

A heartbeat passed, and then another.

"Did my heart love till now? Forswear it, sight, for I ne'er saw true beauty till this night," you recited dramatically, a teasing chuckle laced in your words.

A laugh escaped my lips before I could stop it. "Oh, Romeo, you're too dramatic," I teased back, shaking my head.

You pouted in playful protest before we both dissolved into laughter, the sound filling the empty streets like a quiet melody.

That day, we spent time together—real, uninterrupted time. Your presence made me feel at peace, yet it did nothing to quiet the storm within me.

Because no matter how much I tried to suppress it, my heart was slipping further into the abyss of something I shouldn’t be feeling.

Kim Taehyung… what are you doing to me?

Finally, the week of the fest arrived.

The campus was alive, adorned with lanterns and festoons, buzzing with excitement. Laughter spilled from the hallways, anticipation humming in the air. Teachers worked alongside students, ensuring everything ran smoothly. But amid all the festivity, a bittersweet undertone lingered.

For the senior students, this was the moment—the final celebration before the inevitable farewell.

This was our year to leave.

Even though I had spent most of these years as a nobody, I wasn’t alone. I had my fair share of friends.

And I had you.

Maybe that was why the thought of leaving this place filled me with dread.

Because no matter how much I tried to silence it, I knew I could never gather the courage to confess my feelings. Not when you were happily with her. And yet, I still found myself aching every time I saw you together.

What an irony.

Every moment with you—seeing you walk into rehearsals, acting beside you, kissing you almost every day, and the way you started walking me home after that day—only made me more delusional.

"Y/N-ah, what are you thinking about?"

Your voice pulled me from my thoughts, and I turned to see you walking beside me into the empty auditorium for our final rehearsal.

The place looked breathtaking—soft floral decorations draping every corner, the stage dressed as if it were a bride ready for her wedding. Tomorrow, this very place would witness our last performance.

And after that…

It would be over.

"Nothing special," I mumbled, eyes drifting somewhere—anywhere—but you.

You hummed before chuckling. "Yeah, I know. Actually, you were thinking about me. I am your Romeo, after all."

I rolled my eyes in mock annoyance, but my heart was already betraying me, hammering against my ribs.

Because when you said things like that—when you flirted so effortlessly with that painfully soothing voice of yours—it became impossibly hard to control the storm inside me.

We stood at the edge of the stage, gazing at it, both of us lost in our own thoughts.

"We're a bit early," you noted, glancing around at the empty seats.

I simply nodded, unsure of what to say.

"So… tomorrow’s the day," you murmured, your gaze fixed ahead.

"It is," I replied, my voice quieter than I intended.

"Are you nervous?"

I hesitated. "Kind of."

But it wasn’t just the performance.

I was nervous about graduating.

I was nervous about leaving you.

I was nervous about becoming nothing more than a fleeting memory in your life.

Slowly, you reached for my hand, wrapping it in your own.

Warm. Firm. Steady.

You gave it a small squeeze, your voice dropping an octave as you whispered, "Everything will be all right, Y/N-ah. Trust me."

I saw our end just as it began, yet you still found ways to make me fall deeper into the madness of you.

It was the day.

The day we would stand on stage together, becoming Romeo and Juliet one last time.

Clad in a flowing white and pink, Victorian style inspired dress, I weaved my way through the buzzing corridors, past Miyoung, who squeezed my hand and wished me luck.

I smiled in response, but my heart was pounding too violently to speak.

Tightly clutching the soft fabric of my dress in my fists, I entered the backstage area.

And then, I saw you.

As if drawn by an invisible thread, your eyes met mine in an instant.

And suddenly—everything else blurred.

It was just us.

The noise, the people, the stage—everything melted away.

Only you remained.

You looked breathtaking in your Romeo attire, dangerously attractive, making my mind spin in whirls.

"Finally, Juliet is here!"

Professor Lee’s excited voice pulled us both out of our trance. I blinked as he smiled warmly at me, his kind eyes twinkling.

“You look beautiful,” he complimented, his parently voice full of pride as the other members of the cast praised me, too.

Heat rushed to my cheeks. Bashfully, I thanked him, earning a round of chuckles from the others. But even then, I felt your lingering gaze on me.

Flustered, I quickly walked to stand beside you, my heart racing. You smiled to yourself, looking down at the floor.

And then—

The bell rang.

The drama was about to begin.

All the participants took their places backstage, waiting. The curtains remained drawn as we stepped onto the stage, assuming our positions for the opening scene.

I exhaled shakily, gripping your hands as we locked eyes.

Then, with an elegant sweep, the curtains pulled open.

The crowd erupted.

Cheering. Clapping.

The moment we had rehearsed for weeks was finally here.

And we gave them everything.

We became Romeo and Juliet, pouring our hearts into the act, making the audience believe in our love story.

Every movement, every glance, every whispered line felt real.

And before I knew it—

It was over.

The final bow. The closing of the curtains. The thunderous applause.

And just like that, we were over.

After congratulating our team and exchanging words of appreciation, I slipped away.

I needed air.

The back garden of the school was quiet, bathed in the soft, golden glow of the setting sun. White roses bloomed in the gentle breeze, their petals tinted with the hues of twilight.

Hugging myself, I exhaled deeply, my heart heavy.

"This is it."

I closed my eyes, letting my thoughts consume me—

But then, I felt it.

A pair of strong arms wrapped around my waist, pulling me into a familiar warmth.

I gasped, stiffening—only to immediately relax when I realized it was you.

Your chin rested lightly in the crook of my neck, a soft chuckle escaping your lips.

That boxy smile of yours was still there.

“The drama is done now,” you murmured lightly against my skin. “It was the most perfect it could ever be. So why are you still so tense?”

I swallowed hard.

I could feel your heartbeat against my back.

And suddenly, an unfamiliar determination surged through me.

I took a deep, shaky breath, my hands trembling as I finally let my heart speak.

"Kim Taehyung... would you think I’m crazy if I told you that I'm in love you?"

Your arms around me stiffened.

But I didn’t stop.

"It’s not just today, or a month ago… it’s been since freshmen year. Since the first time I saw you."

My voice wavered, but I pressed on.

"I tried convincing myself it was just an infatuation. But no matter what, my feelings for you only grew stronger. And I hate you for that—"

A choked laugh escaped me, tears welling in my eyes.

"I know you have Hayoon. That’s why I never said anything. But now we’re about to graduate… we’re about to part ways. I just—"

I inhaled shakily.

"I know you don’t love me, and I accept that. But my last request is—"

I looked down, voice barely a whisper.

"Remember me. Even if it’s just in your wildest dreams."

Silence.

My chest heaved from the weight of my confession, my vision blurred by unshed tears.

You were still holding me. But you were stiff.

Then, without warning—

You turned me around, gripping my shoulders, forcing me to look at you.

My breath hitched.

Your eyes burned into mine, dark and intense, brimming with something unreadable.

You leaned in, dangerously close, our lips barely apart by an inch.

My heart stopped.

"T-Taehyung, what are you—"

"What if I say I love you too?"

Your voice was lower. Rougher.

It sent a shiver down my spine.

I froze.

"W-What? But Hayoon—"

You sighed softly, eyes searching mine.

"Hayoon and I ended things a few days ago," you admitted. "We realized we liked the idea of us more than we actually liked each other. It got awkward—uneasy. In the end, we knew we were better as friends."

You took a breath, cupping my cheek.

"And then there was you."

My lips parted in shock.

"The more I got to know you, the more I realized what I truly wanted."

You swallowed, the action causing a movement of your Adam's apple.

"I didn’t just enjoy spending time with you, Y/N. I needed it. And after today… after seeing you on that stage, hearing you say those words…"

A small smile played on your lips.

"I’m ready. More than ever."

You let out a breath, your forehead pressing against mine.

"So tell me—do you say yes to our new beginning?"

Tears streamed down my cheeks.

I could barely nod fast enough.

"Y-Yes!"

And that was all it took.

Your lips crashed onto mine, molding perfectly as if they had always belonged there.

Unlike before, this wasn’t a performance.

It wasn’t a script.

This time, there were real feelings.

On both sides.

And for the first time—

I am not just your Juliet, your partner for a drama.

I am yours. And you are mine.

— copyright: © @eshieslovemaze 0325.

[maopll]

Could I request Kaeya, Diluc, Childe and Zhongli's (separate) s/o laying them down on her lap and playing with the boys' hair when their exhausted?

Put your head on my heart

#genshin impact !

⌗:, a/n: its boutta feel like heaven once I scratch their heads I'm being dead serious...hopefully there's no dandruff...

⌗:, pairings: khaenri'ahn, weird grown up, snezhnaya's greatest toymaker, fossil w/ gn!reader (separately)

⌗:, note: I wanted to post smth before I went to school so pls take it with a grain of salt (low effort work)

— ୨୧ KAEYA

"Ahh...that's feels great" Kaeya mumbled drowsily against your lap.

"You're having real fun by having me at your beck and call huh?" You playfully said as you pressed one spot on his forehead a little harder.

"Ow ow ow gently I'm very feeble" He smirked while looking you with half his eyes closed. It looks like the exhaustion really creeped up to him. He's not one who easily shows through his demeanor how much overworked or even exhausted he is.

To others he may seem like how he usually does but the slight change in his personality spoke words to you. The past week he became sluggish and even fell asleep at the most odd places.

Thus you took it upon your hands to lay him down on your lap and forcibly make him achieve that deserved slumber that he really needed.

"It's not right to overwork yourself so much Kaeya..." your voice sounded like one of worry. Kaeya knew how you felt and...he can't really disagree with you. "I'll be careful next time lovely"

"Oh, you better! you're trying to shave years of my life here with how much you're overworking yourself!" You smack his head. He laughed, seeing you worry so much, and said "aww I'm sorry," all while having a shit eating grin on his face as he smothered your face with his kisses to make you stop worrying. "You have my oath as a knight, my dove" he says so while sealing the words with a kiss on the back of your hand in quite the knightly fashion.

— ୨୧ DILUC

It's way past midnight. The workers and the Maids of the Manor are enjoying the honey heavy dew of slumber while you paced back and forth in your own room's veranda as you stared far into the vineyards to even catch a glimpse of your lover. It's not unusual for Diluc to return late, but it's even more unusual when he hasn't come back after the clock struck 2 a.m.

"Where is he?" Your worries grew like a rapid fire. You tried to calm your nerves by telling yourself "it's alright..." when your ears perked up with the creak of the front door. After some time, you saw Diluc emerge from the shadows with his red hair looking particularly vibrant under the moonlight.

"Gosh, you had me worried there dear..." you strode towards him. "Yes...it looks like I kept you awake and worried for a long time? apologies..." as he sounded those words, his voice grew tired and low as his eyes nearly closed from how drowsy he was. You frowned at this sight of him. So you held his hand gently and guided him towards your bed to let him get that well deserved rest since he looked as if he would flop flat on the ground if you did not let him fall on the bed sooner.

You guided his head towards your lap and ruffled his red locks gently. "I'll help you sleep quicker, Diluc. So just close your eyes now" with a peck to his forehead, you put your hands softly over his eyes. "Thank you...love"

— ୨୧ CHILDE

"Childe...I don't think this is that right place to do this..."

And yes it wasn't. He decided to go out fishing in Dragonspine with you because he said, "I miss the way me and my family used to fish in Snezhnaya" all puppy eyed and stuff. You're always the one who says yes to anything he says but maybe...maybe this time you should've said no...

"But babe I'm tired! won't you let me rest my head on your lap?" so he said when he is literally a harbinger. Him running out of stamina and being exhausted? impossible that's something that will happen in an alternate universe. He just needed a sorry excuse to feel the warmth your thigh emitted because he just couldn't get enough of those.

"Childe I'm not saying that you can't lay on my lap but we are out in the middle of nowhere in adeserted frosty mountain!" You screamed to him while he just jumped up with excitement, "Oh look! I caught a Snowstrider! Great catch!"

"Oh my archons...are we done yet?" you said impatiently because the cold was getting to you. "Aww but I was thinking about catching a few more...alright let's go home now"

You noticed the tone drop in his voice. Looks like he really missed those eventful days of his. So with a sigh and a forgiving smile on your face you agreed to his whims, "Nevermind it's alright, you can fish as much as you want we can go after some time"

Oh what a sight it was when his eyes literally sparkled with joy and the way his ears perked up hearing your words of affirmation. "Thanks babe! Watch me catch the biggest one for you!"

Oh it's going to be a long day...

— ୨୧ ZHONGLI

The vibrant kites were visible from the small window of your house. Lantern Rite comes every year with a new surprise yet even before the preparations are completed before the event, the hustle and bustle of the people as they scurried to prepare meticulously for the biggest event was a joy that could never eb expressed in words.

So here you were. Atop a hill overseeing the entirety of Liyue Harbour with your lover resting on you lap as you played with his hair as soft as the silk flowers and as fragrant as qingxins.

"Do you like the view Zhongli?" you quietly asked, keeping the comforting silence that prevailed amidst the two of you. "As always. Mortals and their customs have never ceased to amaze me." He hummed lowly as you scratched that one spot of his head. He had those areas on his head which felt better than the other places because...he's a dragon after all.

He looked up at you through his lashes and spoke, "Once the Liyue Harbour is decorated, let us visit Mount Aocang to give those old friends a little greeting." You smiled at how much he cared for those who lived along with him. "Sure let's do that"

[jjaehyunnxie]

hide and seek

reader x perv!jisung

! MDNI, jisung is a slight pervert, voyeurism, haechan catches them

"Alright, everybody! Cheers!!" Haechan's loud voice fills the room as the clinking of the glasses ring, before everybody takes a big gulp out of their drinks.

A random act of kindness sparked Chenle when he offered to throw a party at his house. Everybody could swear there was something wrong with him but he insisted on it. And now here you all were. 8 people, all gathered up at one long table covered in food prepared diligently by Chenle and Jaemin (although, everybody offered to help them out). It was a rather wholesome scene. Something about everyone being gathered in one place, sharing conversations and enjoying the same food was so heart warming.

Looking at it carefully, Chenle's house really was huge. Marble flooring, tall pillars with neat designs on them, a ceiling that seemed to go way too high and large windows with a stunning view. Everything was big and expensive-looking. Weirdly enough, it fit Chenle's vibe perfectly.

You sat beside Jisung who was extra talkative today. He kept showing you things he's been into lately, ranting passionately to him. Jisung always mentioned that talking to you about these things made him happy and you knew there was probably no one else willing to listen to his rants so you gave in and offered him your full attention for most of the night, up until food was served and he got silent.

"Attention!" Haechan's voice makes everyone turn their head towards him, clinking his teaspoon on his almost empty glass of beer. "I say...how about, we play a game? A game that can only be played in such a large and beautiful house."

"What are you hinting at? Do you wanna burn my house down or something?" Chenle asks with a slight chuckle, expecting Haechan's response to be entertaining as always.

"Hide and Seek", Haechan says with a smile.

Everyone turns to eachother in confusion. Why such a childish game? You were all full grown adults so why bother with these things?

Donghyuck could feel the frustration growing from the members so he chooses to add something else. "Guys, come on! What's wrong with playing a fun children's game once in a while? Plus, it's not everyday you get to be in a mansion like this! We gotta use it to our heart's content!!"

"I'm in." Chenle says, his smile intrigued. So, once the host agreed to it, obviously everybody else agreed to it as well.

Spinning his empty soju bottle, the cap landed on Haechan. He tried to hide his excitement but it was too obvious he was enjoying this.

Thus, he ends up covering his eyes and counting 'till 20, while everyone else rushed to find a spot to hide. Secretly, everybody tried to make it so that Haechan doesn't succeed in finding anyone, just to see his pout as he swears for the nth time that he'll never play games with "you traitors". But to everybody's surprise, finding a spot to hide was harder than imagined.

At this point, everyone had already hidden. All the good areas you thought of were occupied and Haechan was already reaching the last 10 numbers. Suddenly, as if sent by the heavens, you see a closet in what seemed to be Chenle's room. You dash to it, opening it slowly while you take a second to pray that nobody was inside already. Your prayers were left to scatter as you see Jisung, standing cramped and uncomfortable.

There was just no way you could be this unlucky. Just as you were about to close the door to the closet, thinking about just giving up and turning yourself in - maybe help haechan find everyone else - Jisung grabs your wrist.

"Come in, there's still some space left." he whispers.

This sounded like a bad idea. I mean, you? Cramped up in a tight closet with Jisung? The guy that seemed to always stick to you like glue and that always stares at you with an oddly loving look from afar? Still, as you hear Haechan say "19...18...20!" you give in, quickly entering the closet, trying to take up as little space as the door closes, cutting off any source of light that was there.

Chenle's clothes were stacked on the right side of the closet, while the other side was left empty for any jackets to hang. Despite there being no coats hanging, your back was still pressed against Jisung's chest, cramped up in the tiny space that somehow seemed to be much larger.

For a long while you just hear Haechan's frustrated groans and complaints, "Just where did you guys hide!! Come on!!!" mixed with his confident cheers "Found you! See? I told you I'm good at this! Now help me find the rest...". Of course, all of this on top of Jisung's breathing that kept getting heavier and more uneven. His hands were ghosting over your figure, as if he was trying to shut up every voice in his head that told him to grab your waist or hips - just to touch you.

The limited space for movement was making your body numb. As you try to stretch your limbs, you suddenly feel something hard poke your ass. Jisung is quick to apologise, saying he didn't mean it, that it's just the situation - all the while, his hands were found secured on your hips, gripping them with little shame.

"Jie, what are you-?"

"Shhh...please. I'm sorry, okay? I can't help it..." he whines in a whisper. His apologises are a terrible contrast from his actions which slowly rub your hips on his bulge.

This was so wrong. Yet, why was he so cute? His soft pleads, his painfully desperate voice brushing over your ears as he tries his hardest to beg for you while also staying quiet. His crush on you being so obvious was already adorable in the first place, just how much cuter can this guy even get?

"Please, y/n. Just the tip...I'll be quick-fuck, I'll cum right away, I promise."

You just had to give in.

"Okay, okay. Be quiet, though. Hyuck shouldn't catch us..."

He nods rapidly. "I'll do anything. He won't catch us. I promise you." Jisung rambles empty promises as you can hear the soft clinking of his belt being unbuckled and his zipper quickly pulled down in a swift motion. His hand slides under your skirt, fingers tugging at your panties before pushing them aside. He groans at how wet you already are. You're just as perfect as he always imagined. Plush pussy, glossed and ready for his dick.

He wastes no time, slipping his tip in with ease, earning a shaky exhale from him. He pushes in and out of you, slipping his tip in and out. But with every slide, it feels as if he tries to go deeper.

"Shit, baby. I'm sooo sorry, I need your pussy so bad." he whines as he shoves his whole length in you, finding a steady pace as he thrusts deep. His left hand slithers to your chest, squeezing your breast tightly, while his right hand goes under your skirt, rubbing your clit.

"Y-You said only the-fuck" your moans became more and more difficult to keep quiet, desperate whines that were impossible to not hear from outside.

His hand rushes to your mouth, muffling your moans as his thrusting picks up speed. "It's okay, I'm almost done. Just a little more, okay?" he pleads with a shaky voice, large hands wrapped around your body as the wet sounds of skin slapping filled the small, cramped up area.

"Oh, shiiit, y/n. I'm gonna cum. I'm gonna cum in this tight pussy...'s all yours..."

Unable to warn him about your orgasm approaching as well, it takes you over, cunt clamping down hard on his length as he lets out desperate cries and pleads, continuing to fuck into you silly.

He doesn't last long before his cock shoots its ropes of hot cum in you with stuttering hips, his body left trembling and struggling to keep you up on your feet.

He rushes to stuff his softened dick back in his pants, trying as hard as he can to hide any evidence of his doings but is only startled when Haechan opens the door to Jisung zipping his pants up and you, struggling to stand up and a fucked out expression on your face.

"You guys are seriously unbelievable. If you hadn't finished then, I would've come in myself to finish it off." He scoffs, shaking his head in disbelief. "Searched the whole villa for you two, only to find you having your own 7 minutes in heaven."

[nyarumie]

hey axia ｡⁠◕⁠‿⁠◕⁠｡

enjoy the start of your semester, before uni gets crazy!! I loved your previous works, so I'll just slip into your inbox while the requests are open:3

What do you think would make Hoshina blush, or like, properly flustered?!

(be it headcanon, scenario, or whatever else you feel like, if anything:))

have a great day 🔆

Heart in Your Hands

hoshina soshiro x reader — fluff, comfort, they're both deeply in love, (god me when), short and sweet, established relationship

Author's Reply: Hi, thank you anon! I hope this work caters well to your request; finally got the time to work on something (which hopefully helps with my writer's block)

Reblogs and likes are appreciated! Please view my pinned and masterlist too (⁠◡⁠ ⁠ω⁠ ⁠◡⁠)

Trying to get Soshiro to blush is definitely rarer than a blue moon. Trust me, even his own platoon of talented rookies tried catching him off-guard — it's just near impossible!

Keyword: Near impossible. That's where you enter the picture.

As a Platoon Leader, you do your best to be a figure of inspiration to your officers, thus keeping up your facade of a strict mentor; but honestly—you’re not fooling anyone, you're totally a softie! Despite your personal ‘no-distractions-during-work’ policy, obvious signs of your feelings for the Vice Captain naturally slip out occasionally. Still, you refuse to get your relationship in the way of your work.

Behind closed doors lie the reserved intimacy and affection you held for him. He won't ever admit it, but he sometimes pushes himself too hard, hard enough to have scars and calluses all over his hands from his intense training, and you can only imagine how tight and desperate his grip is on his personalized close combat weapon.

He’s always desperate to prove his worth, desperate to keep the only thing that gives meaning to his existence, and you know that your words are not enough to quell the distress behind each swing and slash of his blades.

That's why you do what you know will calm him best—love him just as fierce as he swings those blades of his.

You caught him training again one night, exhaustion evident on his form. The adrenaline coursing through his body has yet to be quenched, and you know you have to do your magic to get him to rest.

“Soshiro. You're here again. One more night of this and you’ll really strain your body.” you softly said, concern evident in your voice.

He stopped midway his slash, breath heaving as he turned to face you. “Can't rest easy when the rookie officers are a whole ‘nother level, dear. If I don't do this, I doubt I’ll be able to get even the slightest hit on No. 9.”

Sighing, you made your way to him. “Put your weapon down for a while, please? Let me at least do something for you.”

Doing as you asked, he kept them somewhere safe and curiously stood in front of you again. He gave you an inquisitive look, patiently waiting for what you're planning to do.

You took his hands and caressed them, slowly feeling the roughness and evidence of all the nights he's spent bruising himself up just to get even stronger. You move his hands so that his palms are facing you, his eyes widening at your next move.

He felt a soft, careful kiss touch each of his palms, followed by a kiss to each of his fingertips.

He thinks his ears are on fire with how hot it's burning.

“W-what are ya doing, dear? I haven't cleaned my hands up!”

You entwined your hands with his before he could even pull them away, thinking that he didn't like what you just did. “I’m sorry, did I make you uncomf— Oh.”

Oh, indeed. The sight that greeted you when you turned your face up to see him is… remarkable. You can't believe the Third Division’s Vice Captain would be blushing over his significant other tenderly kissing his rough, tired hands.

“Ya didn't have to do that… I know you love me plenty! And please stop gripping on my hands harder, ya aren't letting me turn away!”

You snort. “Of course I won't let you. This is a rare sight. Still, I didn't know something like that could get you severely flustered.” you said, a hint of pride in your tone.

“Told ya I haven't cleaned ‘em up. I was holdin’ those nasty blades moments ago.”

“Ah, excuses. Just say you liked the kisses more than you expected. I’ll let you off this one time and say it's just out of exhaustion.” you giggled.

Your expression turned soft and serious again, now hugging him. His arms wrapped around you, a tired sigh coming from him. “You do so much for me, ya know that? I thought I was gonna explode earlier. Don't know what I did to deserve ya.”

“Mhm, ‘Shiro. You have no idea how at a loss I am sometimes to do something for you. I want to shoulder at least a piece of your burden, want you to share your pain with me without worrying about whether I can take it. Because I will, just for you. I’ll hold your hand whatever happens and stand side by side with you. All I ask is that you take care of yourself.”

He let out a soft laugh of relief. “I should be sayin’ these things to you. I hope ya know how amazing you are to me.”

You both pulled away from the hug, him taking a hand of yours in his. “Let's get some rest. Don't wanna worry my princess over here.”

Smiling in content, you nod your head at him. “Thank you, Soshiro.”

[save-the-villainous-cat]

Hii, do you think you could do a piece with a sleep deprived and overworked hero, and then the villain notices and takes care of them please. Thank you, and I love your writing!!

The hero stared at the ground, trying to catch their breath as best as they could. They were wheezing, in fact, and they couldn’t handle the sudden adrenaline rush very well. Soon enough, their body got tired again and they wanted to sit here for an eternity.

“Is this gonna be a regular thing? You know, just ask me on a date, that would spare me a lot of trouble.” The villain offered the hero their hand and the hero begrudgingly decided to take it.

“I didn’t ask you to save me. Again.” The hero staggered and more or less luckily, the villain’s hand was on their lower back immediately, preventing an undoubtedly embarrassing fall. “And I didn’t ask you to be in my business all the goddamn time.”

The hero took a step back and tried to put more distance between them. They couldn’t waste their time with the villain here, they had work to do, they had things to take care of. The hero needed to collect more data, needed to fight more criminals, needed to work harder and be better.

“Jeez, relax. Was just trying to help, sunshine.” The villain shrugged and let a knife of theirs disappear in their pocket. They looked the hero up and down. “But seriously, are you alright?”

“I’m fine,” the hero said through gritted teeth, lying as if the villain wouldn’t notice.

Obviously, the hero wasn’t doing well. For over a week now, they couldn’t sleep. They were so stressed with upcoming elections (and thus potential sabotages as well as assassinations) that they couldn’t fall asleep, even though they were a walking corpse that longed for rest more than anything. As if that wasn’t enough, they had to concentrate on their usual tasks: battles and paperwork put more stress on them than they could’ve ever imagined.

“You can’t concentrate, your coordination is shit and you’re easily irritated. Don’t think I wouldn’t notice that.” The villain took a step forward, so close to the hero that their head started spinning.

“Honestly, don’t worry about it. You shouldn’t care. We’re enemies,” the hero said. They avoided the villain’s eyes. At work, no one really talked about overworking. No one acknowledged how miserable this job could be.

“We slept together like six times,” the villain said.

“And that was a mistake.”

“Six times? Seems more like a habit.”

“Okay, well, urgh.” The hero put a hand on the villain’s chest. Admittedly, they craved the villain’s attention and touch. They craved a lot of things right now, especially someone who could comfort them. But they made it seem as if they wanted to stop the villain from coming closer.

“We’re not strangers,” the villain said. “I know you. I know you’re not okay. You carry a bunch of stuff with you and you refuse to unpack it. That’s fine, I respect it, but I’d really like you to be okay.”

The hero closed their eyes. Was it bad that they wanted to feel the villain’s fingers on them? Those bloody and scarred hands?

“It’s just…lots of work at the moment. I don’t do well under too much pressure.”

“So, you can’t sleep? Is that it?” The villain’s eyes pierced into the hero’s and the hero could remember the last time they’d been this close a little too well.

Not that it mattered but back then, the hero had stared down at the sweating villain whom they’d pushed into the mattress.

“It’s difficult.”

“You know you can always come to my place.”

“I don’t wanna trouble you.”

“You only trouble me on the battlefield and those are two sides of the same coin.” The villain took in a deep breath. “Just think about it. I kinda miss you. And we don’t even have to do anything. You just need someone to make you a proper dinner.”

“As if I’m living on instant noodles.”

“You are living on instant noodles. Think about it.”

They pressed a soft kiss to the hero’s cheek and it was safe to say that the villain spoiled the hero when they visited them that night.

[irisfixation]

knights getting mindbroken. you agree. enjoy

"She's just ahead. Let's get ready." It wasn't difficult to make it this far. The palace was left in ruins decades ago, and the few guards still under her spell were little more than shambling corpses, easily dispatched by your party. You expected a little more, to be honest: some final bastion of opulence at the place's heart, as it were. But no - here it is, the throne room of the "empress of ruins"'. Once a feared tyrant, now little more than prey to be put upon your sword. If she's anything like her guards, you doubt it'll be harder than any other job.

She doesn't look like the stories. Once, she might have been adorned in all her fineries, hair tied back and dress magnificent. Now, though, she's little more than a haggard, scrawny wretch. You can see the bags under her eyes all the way from the boss door, let alone the rags and stolen traveler's attire she's wearing. One of your party members can barely stifle a giggle.

"Hold it," another commands. "She'll see us if we draw any closer. We should prepare." A tedious task, really, given how easy the journey thus far has been. Still, you acquiesce. One hireling takes a detour in search of something that piqued her interest, another sets about marking spell-circles into the earth beneath, a third makes camp and begins preparing your rations, and so on, and so forth.

You - you scout out at the thresholds of the gate, watching the once-empress as she lays unmoving. You rehearse battle stratagems in your head, reflect on the research conducted by previous adventuring parties, the whole nine yards. "She'll get desperate when she's wounded enough-" you recall, "so conserve your strength until then". You'll cover for the rest of the party to start, and then-

Her glare snaps you back to the here and now. Oh, shit. The tip of your boot has crossed the ruined threshold; you can just make out where the microfilament runes across its border intersect with your foot. She knows you're here.

That's fine, you reassure to yourself. The rest of the party should be ready soon enough - and besides, you're the best of the bunch. You'll hold her down until then. Your armaments gleam in stark contrast to her sorry state as you step forwards.

She lurches forwards, a slow and dreary movement. Fine by you. You take your stance, and call out with sheer heroic might in your voice. "Give it up, would-be empress! Today, your feeble reign finally comes to an en-"

In a blink, she is upon you, barreling with the speed of a starving and maddened wolf. You barely have time to call to your allies and attempt to swing your sword before-

A single outstretched finger presses upon your forehead. Her hand is gnarled and dust-caked, but the point of the nail is pristine as crystal. You watch as the frantic charge of your allies slows to a crawl, then freezes entirely. Time magic? No, it's more like your mind's been trapped within a single moment - like the compressed moment of time spent trying to catch something in mid-fall, magnified hundredfold.

You recoil. And as you do, you feel something worm its way out of you, plucked from your skull. It twists and gravitates towards her, gossamer-thin filament of gold and scarlet, wrapping around her finger like a ring or snake.

The shock of the moment ceases. She's barely two feet from you, and as frail as the dust upon her kingdom - your hands clench upon cold steel, your blade moves to seek her head -

"Stop."

Your body seizes up, arms and muscles pulling to a taut rictus. You can't even bring yourself to fall over in defiance - you feel your limbs pull into the closest approximation of a bow they can manage. She looks at you with icy eyes, and you realize your comrades aren't doing anything. Are they even there? You cannot hear their breaths, cannot turn to look-

"Kneel. Goodness, you were easier than I expected."

"What in hell's name did you- take from me-"

"Your ability to disobey orders," she says, her voice low and measured. She's clearly enjoying hearing herself talk, which sickens you all the more. "The only thing keeping the 'self' from being consumed by the 'other' - your soul. Your free will. You really didn't even expect this much?" "The kingdom," you sputter, "will have your head for this-"

"Silence." Your tongue is stilled in your own mouth; your own breath feels too there, too physical upon your throat and lips, like breathing and swallowing smog.

"The -kingdom- will arrive here too late, if at all," she rebuts. "I never needed anything more than a singular doll to rewrite, after all." She lifts your head to meet her gaze; her smirk does not reach their depths. "And would you look at that - a cocky, self-assured knight, delivered right into my lap. But of course, I only let you down here in the first place because of your incompetence."

Fuck. No wonder the journey had felt so easy, that all the actual moments of drama and risk just happened to work out in your favor. Had she engineered every last one of them? Just for - what, this?

"If I was -actually- worried, I would have vanished before you even arrived here. Unlike you, I actually take my position -seriously.- Now! Beg for me, please."

"of course my goddess please i am yours i am yours forever i'll serve you to the day i die please use me however you wish" The words spill from your mouth before your conscious mind has a say in the matter. "my life is yours it always has been nothing else matters" You try and bite them back, to deny them, but they sear something into you: your mind conjures images of a parasite tunneling down through brain matter.

"Exactly. And I'll keep doing this, one pitiful would-be hero at a time."

She looks down at you again, and you witness her wreathed in a halo of eyes; each reflecting a vision of your life, your loved ones, your family, your life, your memories. A million different reflections of how they could be snuffed out if you dared disobey your new Empress - of how much you possibly have to lose, more than you could ever truly understand-

"There's nothing your little 'kingdom' can do about it. Certainly nothing you could."

She's right. Of course she is.

"Now, please go to sleep for now-"

---------

(the end! for now, anyhow)

[danicareadssmut]

When Gravity Breaks

"I'm sorry, Tara, but it's been such a busy week I thought it would just be nice to lay in bed and catch up on some shows that I missed," you say as you shuffle through the meager offerings in your pantry, looking for a snack while you wait for your food delivery to arrive.

"But it's Friday," Tara whines through the phone. "How can you not want to go out on a Friday night? What about Xavier? Doesn't he like to go out, too? Bring him along!"

Xavier has been away for days on a lead on Ever but you can't say that so you just sigh. "He's not available, Tara."

She gasps and lowers her voice. "You didn't break up, did you?"

"What?" You practically shriek, nearly dropping the phone in the process. "We're not even dating."

"Mmm-hmm, sure," Tara says with a giggle.

There's a knock at the door. You look over your shoulder, grateful that your food came quicker than planned. "Tara, my food's here. I gotta go."

She sighs dramatically. "Fiiiine. If you want to be boring, that's up to you. Just call me if you change your mind!"

She's gone before you have the chance to say anything. You smile and shake your head as you toss your phone onto the nearby chair and make your way to the door. But when you open it, it's not a food delivery person waiting for you on the other side.

"Caleb," you whisper-yell. "What the hell?"

He looks terrible. His sweaty hair is plastered to his face and he's holding his ribs like they're broken. And you think you see the traces of blood on his shirt. You stick your head out of the door to quickly look up and down the hallway for pursuers and when you see none, you pull Caleb inside, ignoring his sharp hiss at the movement.

"What the hell happened to you?"

He stumbles toward your couch but you redirect him to your bedroom instead. "No, the bed will be more comfortable. And I need better light to see what I'm dealing with."

Your hands hover near his waist, ready to catch him if he falls, and the proximity makes your heart thunder in your chest. He moves slowly, each step careful and measured, until you can ease him down onto your bed.

"Take off your shirt," you command, trying to keep your voice steady and clinical. When he struggles with the buttons, you step between his legs and bat his hands away. "Let me."

Your fingers tremble slightly as you work each button free. The last time you were this close to him, he was saving your life. Now here he is, trusting you to save his. You push the shirt from his shoulders, wincing at his sharp intake of breath, and the sight of his bruised torso makes you gasp.

"It's not as bad as it looks," he says, but you're already running gentle fingers over the dark patches blooming across his ribs.

"Don't lie to me, Caleb." Your voice comes out harder than intended, years of worry and grief bleeding into your words. "Not anymore."

His hand catches yours where it rests against his skin, and the touch sends electricity racing up your arm. "Mikki..."

You pull away before you can do something stupid like cry. Or kiss him. "Stay here. I need my med kit."

In the bathroom, you brace yourself against the counter and take a moment to breathe, to steady yourself. When you return with supplies, he's exactly where you left him, shirtless and vulnerable on your bed. The sight does things to your heart you'd rather not examine too closely.

"This is going to hurt," you warn as you clean the cuts along his side. He doesn't flinch, but you feel the tension in his muscles under your fingertips. "Want to tell me what happened?"

"Better if you don't know."

You press harder than necessary with the antiseptic wipe, making him suck in a pained breath. "That's not fair. You can't just show up at my door looking like this and expect me not to ask questions."

His hand closes around your wrist, stilling your movements. "Mikki, look at me."

You don't want to. Looking at him means remembering everything—the way he used to smile at you over breakfast, how safe you felt when he held you during thunderstorms, the moment you realized your feelings had grown into something decidedly un-sibling-like. But his evol tugs at you gently, a familiar pressure that draws your gaze up to meet his.

"I'm trying to protect you," he says softly.

"And who's protecting you?" The words catch in your throat as you notice how close you've gotten, still standing between his legs, one hand pressed against his chest where you can feel his heartbeat racing to match yours.

His other hand comes up to cup your face, thumb brushing across your cheek, and you can't help but lean into the touch. "You are," he whispers. "Right now."

The air between you grows thick with unspoken words, with years of longing and regret. You should step back. You should finish bandaging his wounds and send him on his way. You should remember all the reasons why this is a bad idea.

Instead, you find yourself swaying closer, drawn in by the gravity of him—his power, his presence, everything he means to you...

A sharp inhale of pain from him breaks the spell. You jerk back, mentally scolding yourself for getting lost in the moment when he's injured and unguarded. His hand falls away from your face, leaving a ghostly warmth behind that you try desperately to ignore.

"Sorry," you mumble, focusing intently on the medical supplies spread beside him. "I should finish wrapping your ribs."

He says nothing as you work, but you can feel his eyes on you, heavy with everything left unsaid. Your fingers brush against his skin as you wrap the bandage around his torso, and each touch feels like playing with fire. You've had your share of intimate moments with people since you thought he died—passionate nights with Xavier, heated encounters with Zayne and Rafayel—but nothing has ever felt as charged as this simple act of tending to Caleb's wounds.

"Remember when we were kids," he says suddenly, his voice rough, "and I fell out of that tree in Gran's backyard?"

Your hands falter for a moment. "You broke your arm. Gran was so mad at you."

"But you weren't. You just sat with me in the hospital, holding my good hand."

"I was terrified," you admit, securing the bandage perhaps a bit tighter than necessary. "You were always trying to protect me, but who was going to protect you from yourself?"

His laugh is bitter. "Some things never change, huh?"

You step back, putting much-needed distance between you. "Everything's changed, Caleb. You made sure of that when you let me think you were dead for a year."

The words hang heavy in the air between you. He reaches for his shirt, wincing as he slides it back on, and you have to fight the urge to help him with the buttons.

"I didn't have a choice," he says quietly.

"There's always a choice." You start packing away the medical supplies, needing something to do with your hands. "You chose to leave me alone. You chose to let me grieve. You chose to—" Your voice breaks and you swallow hard. "Do you have any idea what that did to me?"

"Mikki..." The way he says your name still makes your heart stutter, even after everything. "I know about the others. Xavier. Zayne. The artist."

Heat rises to your face—anger or embarrassment, you're not sure which. "You don't get to judge who I—"

"I'm not," he cuts in, and when you look at him, the raw emotion in his eyes makes you pull up short. "I want you to be happy. Even if it's not with..." He trails off, looking away. "I just need you to be safe."

"Safe," you repeat, the word tasting bitter on your tongue. "I'm a Deepspace Hunter, Caleb. Safety isn't exactly in the job description."

He pushes himself to his feet, swaying slightly. Before you can stop yourself, you're at his side, steadying him with a hand around his back. The contact sends sparks through your fingers.

"The chip in my head," he says, so quietly you almost miss it, "it's changing me. Every day, I feel myself slipping away a little more. The only thing that keeps me anchored is—" He stops, jaw clenching.

"Is what?"

His eyes meet yours, and the intensity in them makes you want to step back. Or forward. You're not sure which would be more dangerous.

"You," he whispers. "It's always been you, Mikki."

Your chest aches with the weight of everything between you—past and present, love and loss, desire and duty. It would be so easy to close the distance, to finally give in to what you've both wanted for so long. But you can't. Not like this, not with him injured and compromised, not with so many secrets still between you.

"You should rest," you say instead, stepping away from him. "Take the bed. I'll sleep on the couch."

"Mikki—"

"Please," you cut him off, not trusting yourself to look at him. "Just... get some rest."

You grab what you need for the night and head for the door. Just before you close it behind you, you hear him say your name again, soft and full of longing. You pretend not to hear it, just like you pretend not to notice the way your hands shake as you make up the couch.

Some distances, you think as you lie awake in the dark, aren't meant to be crossed. Not yet. Maybe not ever. But as you drift off to an uneasy sleep, you can't help but wonder if you're both just delaying the inevitable.

___________________________________________

The smell of coffee pulls you from sleep, and for a moment, you're transported back in time—lazy weekend mornings at Gran's, the sound of Caleb humming in the kitchen while you tried to steal a few more minutes of rest. The familiar ache of nostalgia settles in your chest before reality crashes back.

You sit up quickly, wincing at the stiffness in your neck from sleeping on the couch. The sounds and scents from your kitchen are real enough, though, and you follow them like a siren's call.

Caleb stands at your stove, his back to you, expertly flipping what looks like French toast. He's wearing yesterday's pants but has borrowed one of Xavier's t-shirts that you keep here for emergencies. The sight of him in another man's clothes does something complicated to your insides.

"Your pantry is pathetic," he says without turning around, and you remember how his evol let him sense movement and mass. "But I managed to find enough for breakfast."

"Some of us don't cook much anymore," you reply, trying to ignore how domestic this feels. How right. "How are your ribs?"

He turns then, and your breath catches. In the morning light streaming through your kitchen window, he looks so much like the boy you grew up with—soft around the edges, guard down, a small smile playing at his lips. But there's something darker in his eyes now, something hungry that makes your pulse quicken.

"Better," he says, placing a plate of French toast on the counter. "I heal fast. You know that."

You do know that. You also know he's probably downplaying his pain, like always. "The shirt..."

"Hope you don't mind. Mine was a mess." He gestures to the coffee maker. "Still take it with too much sugar?"

The fact that he remembers how you take your coffee shouldn't affect you this much. "Yeah."

He fixes your cup perfectly without asking, sliding it across the counter to you. Your fingers brush as you take it, and the contact sends electricity racing up your arm. His evol flutters against your skin, gentle but present, like he can't quite help himself.

"This feels familiar," you say before you can stop yourself.

"Too familiar," he agrees, his voice rough. He turns back to the stove, but not before you catch the flash of longing in his eyes. "Eat before it gets cold."

You settle at the island, watching him move around your kitchen like he belongs there. He's always been graceful, but there's something different about him now—something predatory in the way he moves, like he's constantly ready for a fight. The military training, you suppose. Or maybe the chip.

"Stop analyzing me," he says, finally fixing his own plate and leaning against the island across from you. He doesn't sit—you notice he's positioned himself where he can see both the door and the windows.

"Can't help it. It's my job to notice things."

His lips quirk up. "And what are you noticing?"

You take a bite of French toast to avoid answering immediately. It tastes exactly like you remember—a hint of cinnamon, perfectly crispy edges. "You still make it just like Gran taught us."

Something soft and painful flashes across his face at the mention of Gran. His hand twitches like he wants to reach for you, but he restrains himself. "Some things you don't forget."

The words hang between you, heavy with meaning. You both know he's not just talking about cooking anymore.

"Caleb..." you start, but you're not sure what you want to say. Thank you for breakfast? I've missed this? I've missed you?

His power pulses again, stronger this time, drawing you toward him like a magnet. You resist it, but just barely. "Don't," he warns, his voice strained. "Please."

You realize you've both been leaning closer across the counter, drawn together by something stronger than his evol. You straighten up, taking your coffee cup with you as you step back.

"I should get ready for work," you say, even though it's Saturday and you have nowhere to be.

He nods, recognizing the lie but accepting it anyway. "I'll clean up here before I go."

"You don't have to—"

"Let me do this," he interrupts softly. "Just... let me have this moment."

You flee to the bathroom before you can do something stupid like cry over breakfast. Or worse, kiss him over your empty plates and ruin everything you've both been trying so hard to protect.

You spend longer than necessary in the bathroom, halfway hoping Caleb will be gone when you come out and halfway hoping he won't, but when you open the door you nearly collide with him. Caleb's imposing frame fills the doorway, his hands gripping the frame on either side like he needs it to hold himself back. His head is bowed, but you can see the tension in his jaw, the way his knuckles have gone white from gripping the wood too hard.

"Caleb?" Your voice comes out barely above a whisper.

He doesn't move, doesn't look up. "I tried to leave," he says, his voice rough. "I got as far as the door."

Your heart thunders in your chest. He's so close you can smell your soap on his skin from when he must have cleaned up earlier. The borrowed t-shirt stretches across his shoulders, and you can see the slight tremor in his arms as he fights whatever battle he's waging with himself.

"Why didn't you?" The question slips out before you can stop it.

His power ripples through the air between you, making your skin tingle with awareness. "You know why."

"Tell me anyway." You don't know why you're pushing, why you're testing the fragile restraint you can both feel cracking.

He finally looks up, and the raw need in his eyes steals your breath. "Because every time I walk away from you, it feels like dying. And I've done that enough for one lifetime, don't you think?"

You should step back. You should put some distance between you before you cross a line you can't uncross. Instead, you find yourself swaying forward, drawn into his orbit like you've always been.

"Mikki," he warns, but he doesn't move away. If anything, his gravity pulls you closer, betraying his own desire. "We can't—"

"I know," you breathe, even as you lift your hand to rest against his chest, feeling his heart racing under your palm. "I know all the reasons why we shouldn't."

His breathing turns ragged. "Then why are you looking at me like that?"

"Because I'm tired of pretending I don't want to."

In an instant, his control snaps. His evol surges, pulling you against him as he pushes off the doorframe. Your back hits the hallway wall and then he's there, one hand tangled in your hair, the other gripping your hip like he's afraid you'll disappear if he lets go.

"Tell me to stop," he breathes against your lips, his forehead pressed to yours. "Tell me this isn't what you want."

Instead of answering, you fist your hands in his borrowed shirt and pull him down to you. The first brush of his lips against yours is electric, a year of grief and a lifetime of wanting crystallizing into this one perfect moment. Then he makes a sound, desperate and hungry, and the kiss turns fierce.

You've imagined this countless times—as teenagers sharing secret glances across Gran's dinner table, during lonely nights after his supposed death, in guilty dreams that left you aching—but nothing compares to the reality of Caleb's mouth on yours, his body pressing you into the wall, his power wrapping around you both like a cocoon.

His hands slide down your sides, leaving trails of fire in their wake, and when he lifts you, your legs wrap around his waist instinctively. The movement makes him groan into your mouth, deep and raw, and you feel it everywhere.

"Do you have any idea," he pants between kisses, "how long I've wanted this? Wanted you?"

"Show me," you challenge, and his eyes darken.

He captures your mouth again, and this time there's no hesitation, no holding back. This kiss tastes like morning coffee and desperation and years of pent-up longing finally breaking free. His evol pulses with each beat of his heart, holding you suspended between him and the wall, making you feel weightless and anchored all at once.

You know there will be consequences. You know there are a hundred reasons why this is complicated and dangerous and possibly a terrible idea. But right now, with Caleb's hands on your skin and his breath mingling with yours, you can't bring yourself to care about anything except this moment, this feeling, this man you've loved for so long finally, finally in your arms.

The future can wait. The past can burn away like morning mist. Right now, there's only this—gravity and need and the weight of everything unsaid transforming into something new and electric and inevitable between you.

His mouth trails down your neck, and you gasp his name as his power shifts, taking your weight so his hands can explore. Every touch feels amplified, electric, like his power is heightening each sensation. Your fingers slide under his borrowed shirt, tracing the muscles of his back, careful of his injuries but desperate to feel his skin against yours.

"Tell me this is real," he breathes against your throat. "Tell me I'm not dreaming again."

The vulnerability in his voice makes your heart ache. You cup his face, drawing him back to look at you. "I'm here," you whisper. "We're here."

His eyes darken, and suddenly you're floating, weightless in his power as he carries you to your bedroom. He lays you on the bed with a gentleness that contrasts sharply with the hunger in his gaze. When he pulls his shirt off, you see the bandages from last night, a stark reminder of everything that's changed.

"Your ribs—" you start, concerned, but he cuts you off with a kiss that makes you forget everything except the feel of him.

"I don't care," he says against your lips. "I've waited too long for this. For you."

There are words building in your chest—confessions and questions and declarations of love—but you swallow them down, lost in the sensation of him, solid and warm and real above you.

His hands are everywhere, touching and teasing and memorizing the shape of your body, and you arch into him, desperate for more. Each touch leaves trails of fire in its wake, burning away the layers of pain and grief and guilt until it's just the two of you, skin to skin, hearts beating in tandem.

He's kissing a path down your body, his teeth nipping at your hip bone, and when he looks up at you, something dangerous flares in his eyes.

"I never dared to hope," he says, his voice raw, "that I'd get to have this. Have you."

You run your fingers through his hair, and he closes his eyes, leaning into the touch.

"Me neither," you admit, and when his eyes open again, they're full of a hunger that makes your heart stutter.

"I'm going to spend all day showing you exactly how much I missed you."

With that, his mouth is on you, his tongue sending sparks shooting through your entire body. He works you over expertly, and you know without asking that he's imagined this—that he's wanted this—because the way his evol is tugging at your senses, teasing and torturing you in the best possible way, means he's felt this connection, this electric charge between you as much as you have.

When his lips find yours again, the raw need in his kiss nearly breaks you apart. Your hands roam through his dark hair and over his powerful shoulders, nails raking over his muscles hard enough to earn you a sharp hiss. When his eyes meet yours, there's that boyish playfulness in the way he smiles layered with the masculine desire of a powerful man.

"Are you trying to mark me?" he asks, voice husky.

"No," you lie, and the heat in his gaze intensifies.

He leans back on his knees, his power keeping your hips anchored to the bed. You watch with rapt attention as he finishes stripping, his impressive body revealed inch by inch. His bandages fall away and his wounds, you notice, are almost entirely healed, the marks of whatever fight led him here faded almost completely.

"How are your ribs?" you ask.

"Perfect."

He's on you again, his weight a comforting pressure, his hands everywhere, his gravity a tangible presence, drawing you together. You're drowning in him, and you have no desire to come up for air. He tugs at your pajamas, suddenly eager to remove the last vestiges of any physical barrier between you. When you're both finally naked, the full length of his body pressing you into the mattress, you gasp his name, a prayer and a plea.

"I need to hear you say it," he rasps. "Please."

You understand immediately, because you need the same thing. It's not enough to simply feel the weight of his desire in the air.

"Caleb," you whisper, "I want this."

"Fuck," he groans. "Mikki. I've wanted this for so long."

It's all the warning you get before he's sliding inside of you, filling you in a way that's both familiar and foreign. You're not a stranger to sex, but the feel of him stretching and teasing and possessing every inch of you is a sensation you've never experienced, though you've imagined it thoroughly. He's so big, in every way possible, that what he does to you feels like a possession. Like a hostile takeover of foreign lands.

"God," he groans. "You're so..."

"Don't stop," you beg.

"Never."

And he doesn't. He sets a slow pace at first, one hand braced above your head, the other tangled in your hair. His eyes never leave yours, and it's too much and not enough and everything all at once. He moves slowly, enjoying the ebb and flow of his cock sliding against your walls and you nearly lose your mind from the intensity of the feeling. Then, gradually as if he can't quite control himself anymore, he begins to speed up, his eyes clenching shut and his breaths coming out as soft moans and grunts.

His gravity pulses around you both, pulling and tugging and coaxing more and more pleasure from your body, as his hand finds your hip, pulling your body so tight against his that the base of his cock presses against your clit in a way that has you going momentarily blind. You cling to him, nails raking across his shoulders and through his hair, the sound of his name on your lips like a mantra, and when he kisses you, his mouth hot and desperate, you taste the salt of tears, though whose, you're not sure.

"I've got you," he whispers against your mouth, and the tenderness of his voice, the weight of his words, the feel of his body pressed to yours, is enough to push you over the edge.

You shatter, and he follows, your names on each other's lips as the world around you falls apart.

The past is a wound.

The future an unknown.

But in the moments that follow, suspended in a tangle of sweat-soaked limbs and shaky breaths, his evol wrapped around you like a protective cloak, you have never felt safer.

As your panting breaths override the silence of the room, he presses his lips to your forehead and whispers, "Thank you."

"For what?"

He doesn't answer. He doesn't have to. You already know.

"So much for not crossing lines," you murmur.

His soft laugh ruffles your hair. "That's what this was about, wasn't it?"

"What do you mean?"

"Us crossing the line. Moving beyond... everything."

"Caleb—"

He silences you with a kiss, tender and lingering. "I'm not apologizing," he says, brushing a thumb across your cheek. "Not for this. I won't."

You search his face, the sharp angles and soft smile, and realize he's right. It was only a matter of time. You were destined to collide just as the stars themselves are destined to fall apart under the weight of their own gravity. And just like the stars, something new and beautiful and terrifyingly powerful will be reborn from what's left in your wake.

___________________________________________

The knock at your door is so quiet that Caleb might have missed it if not for his evol sensing the mass on the other side. He carefully extracts himself from where you're curled against him, sleeping peacefully, and pulls on his borrowed pants. He doesn't bother with shoes—this is your space, after all, and he wants the visitor to know exactly how comfortable he is here.

When he opens the door, he finds himself face to face with Xavier. The Hunter's expression shifts from neutral to murderous in the span of a heartbeat as he takes in Caleb's state of undress—particularly the t-shirt he's wearing.

"That's my shirt," Xavier says, his voice deadly quiet.

Caleb leans against the doorframe, purposefully casual, and lets a smirk play across his lips. "Is it? Mikki keeps it here, so I just assumed..."

The temperature in the hallway seems to drop several degrees. Xavier's hands are loose at his sides, but Caleb recognizes the stance of a man ready to strike. He can feel the Hunter's power simmering just beneath the surface.

"Where is she?"

"Sleeping," Caleb says, his smirk widening. "It's been a... long day."

Xavier's jaw clenches. "You're supposed to be dead."

"Sorry to disappoint." Caleb's evol ripples through the air between them, a subtle reminder of exactly who Xavier is dealing with. "Though I hear you've been keeping her company in my absence."

"I've been keeping her safe," Xavier counters, taking a step closer. "While you were playing soldier and letting her think you were dead."

The smirk falls from Caleb's face. "Everything I've done has been to protect her."

"And how's that working out for you, Colonel?" Xavier's smile is sharp as glass. "That chip in your head turning you into everything she's fighting against?"

Caleb's power surges, but Xavier doesn't flinch. They stand there, two apex predators sizing each other up, the air thick with unspoken threats.

"You live upstairs," Caleb says finally, not a question. "Apartment 4B. Close enough to watch over her, far enough to maintain plausible deniability. Smart."

"And you're in her bed," Xavier replies, equally measured. "Close enough to protect her, or close enough to kill her when that chip finally overwrites whatever's left of your conscience?"

Caleb pushes off the doorframe, drawing himself to his full height. "I would die before I let anything happen to her."

"That's what you said last time, isn't it? Right before you disappeared and left her broken?"

The gravity in the hallway intensifies, but Xavier stands his ground. They both know they can't fight here—not with you sleeping just rooms away, not with so much at stake.

"She chose me," Caleb says softly, dangerously. "Today, tomorrow, always—she'll choose me."

"For now," Xavier concedes with a slight nod. "But when that chip turns you into Ever's weapon? I'll be here. I'll be the one picking up the pieces. Again."

He turns to leave but pauses at the stairs. "Oh, and Caleb? Burn the shirt when you're done with it. It looked better on her anyway."

Caleb watches him disappear up the stairs, his power slowly settling back to normal. He closes the door quietly and returns to your bedroom, where you're still sleeping peacefully, unaware of the predators circling your life.

He slides back into bed, pulling you close, and you mumble his name in your sleep. His arms tighten around you as Xavier's words echo in his head. The Hunter wasn't wrong—the chip is a time bomb, and they both know it.

But for now, he has this. He has you. And he'll fight like hell to keep it that way.

[voiceofthelionhearted]

random gaming headcanons for stp. just bc i thought about it recently

hero plays virtually any game. he's versatile, and likes to play games with the others, or will just watch any of the others play.

paranoid doesn't like scary games. but he's STUPIDLY good at them. they're also somehow the only kinds of games he plays?? thank goodness for multiplayer horror games -- though you can guarantee he's yelling at whoever he's playing with for fucking things up or breaking his concentration.

broken doesn't usually play games. he's perfectly happy just watching others play, but he'll play cozy games if invited. he also likes games where you can catch and raise wild critters as companions. and, he won't tell anyone this, but he likes winning in games. it's cathartic for him, but he rarely plays competitive games anyway, preferring to stick to games that are easier for him to play

stubborn is banned from playing hard games. he gets too into them, and accidentally breaks controllers bc he's too strong. so he's not allowed to play them anymore and is only allowed to watch (though he's on thin fucking ice). he will play cozy games though and tries to rope broken into them.

skeptic likes puzzle and investigative games. he likes it when his brain works when playing games. cold tells him to play harder games bc those also pick at your brain, just in a different way.

cold doesn't usually play games, but when he does, it's hard games (think bloodborne, souls games). i am partially projecting here, but those games are GOOD at making you feel shit. yoi get frustrated as you die a lot, and feel vindicated when you finally best whatever enemy was fucking you up. i think he would like them bc they're super engaging

cheated also likes to play hard games. the razor is "an impossible-to-beat boss" and he shows up in her chapter. he never gives up against her and always wants to try different things, so i think he'd get a kick out of soulsborne games as well. he'd feel an immense satisfaction at defeating difficult enemies, which is just what he needs!

contrarian plays just about any kind of game. his favorite kinds are ones that reward him for exploring every nook and cranny, even if those rewards are just silly messages (which he gets a kick out of). he also loves the gotta go fast games (you know what i'm talking about).

smitten enjoys romance visual novels and cozy games. he also tries to rope broken into playing multiplayer cozy games with him. he likes raising animals and building a farm, as it's busywork, but is very rewarding.

opportunist likes to play multiplayer games with the others. he enjoys figuring out strategies and is crazy good at either defeating the others if they're playing a versus game, or figuring out a way to move forward in a co-op game.

hunted doesn't really play games. he watches the other play and will play if invited. it's a shame bc he's actually really good at them bc his hand-eye coordination is crazy good.

adversary and stubborn used to play fighting games together, but they both get too into them and have thus been banned. they were both pretty sulky about it, but have agreed that fighting in real life is better anyway (no, they're not being sour grapes about it, what are you talking about?). she likes to play racing and party games and tries to rope stubborn, witch, and damsel into them, but again, stubborn gets too into them and has been Banned. witch gets super competitive and will Actually Jump adversary if she wins too often. damsel is happy to be there, and though she won't say it, she really likes winning -- especially since the others hype her up when she does bc she looks at them like this 🥹 and they can't help it

witch likes cozy games too, but she is specifically drawn to the farming, foraging, and fishing aspects of farming sims. who are the npcs? she couldn't fucking tell you. she, damsel, and adversary play together and they're always taken aback when they go into the mines and damsel is the one beating monsters' asses (partially bc they want to protect her, but also bc she just goes?? quiet??? until the monsters are all slain and then is back to sunshine and rainbows after, asking dutifully if anyone got hurt bc she "brought a lot of food!"). she must have a hidden anger....

spectre plays anything. she also likes to watch others play. she will tease the others if they're bad at a game, but will give them words of encouragement if they're good at one. since she plays anything, she can join in on anyone's shenanigans and she's scarily good at games, so everyone wants her on their side.

prisoner plays puzzle and investigative games, like skeptic does, but she's also on cold's side about hard games being satisfying. in soulsborne games, she is a parrying GOD and you'd better hope she doesn't enter your world as an adversary (which, luckily for everyone, she's not super into that -- it's more satisfying to best difficult bosses after all). her patience is always rewarded in these kinds of games.

beast likes to try to rope hunted into competitive games, and he obliges her sometimes -- although, not always, bc he thinks she gets a little scary when they play together. she's really competitive and aggressive when playing these kinds of games, but it never translates to real life.

den likes to cuddle with anyone who's watching the others play. this includes hunted, broken, hero, damsel, spectre, prisoner... really, just anyone who's willing to cuddle and not currently playing. they make a cuddle pile sometimes with her and then all eyes are glued to the screen while it's playing someone's game.

[dreeki]

ᯓᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹ my best friend's brother. [part 1]

pairing: bsf's brother!jake x f!reader

warnings: loser jake(not so loser, i don't know how to write jake as a loser... sorry), sunghoon is jake's brother and a year older than him, jake and y/n are the same age

syn: your best friend is busy with uni while you start your senior year of high school. what happens when your unexpected study partner turns out to be his brother?

note: not proofread! hope you like it 🙌 leave your thoughts in the comments pls!!

☆ you and sunghoon became friends during your freshman year of high school, despite being a year younger than him. he was the one that welcomed you to the unfamiliar place and the two of you bonded quite fast. ever since then, he would always hang around your house and you spent almost all of your time with him, whether you were celebrating an achievement or trying to comfort each other. neither of you liked to talk about your families, feeling like the topic would sadden the mood, thus why the only time family had been brought up was when sunghoon mentioned that he has a younger brother that is currently living in a different city, due to their parents being split up, each taking one of the brothers to live with them. he rapidly showed you a picture of his brother, jake, but you could barely catch a glimpse of his face before the photo was snatched out of your line of vision.

fast forward to the summer before senior year, you and sunghoon were still close friends, not even noticing that the boy had graduated high school already, since his university was in the same city. you would still regularly hang out and chat daily until your bodies would remind you it's time to rest. many people wondered how the two of you were so close, yet weren't dating; neither of you have ever thought about it. your relationship with each other just wasn't that way. you were simply good friends and you had always been grateful for that.

two weeks before the start of your final year of high school, sunghoon told you that his younger brother is gonna move back in with him. "why now though?" you asked a bit confused. "jake said he found a really good university here and thought i'd be easier for him to move now, rather than next year" "oh.. yea, sure, it makes sense" and that was the last conversation on the topic.

assignments had started to get sunghoon stressed once the first year of university started. he was extra busy now, making it harder for you to communicate the same way you did during summer break. of course you weren't going to blame him; you could imagine how hard uni was and how it must be so exhausting for him, especially as a first year student. you were just a bit bummed that you hadn't had the chance to meet his brother yet. sunghoon mentioned that he wanted you to meet jake at a fancy dinner, so now you had to wait until your best friend was finally free from the hell that university is.

senior year wasn't as bad as you expected. yes, the teachers wanted more from every one of you, but it was honestly less stressful than what you thought it was gonna be. since sunghoon was currently drowning in books, you decided that spending more time at the library, studying, will help you a lot too; getting better grades and filling the hole left by sunghoon's abscence. it was also nice that you got to see the handsome face of an unknown boy every time you studied there.

the third week after school started, you could almost swear that your physics teacher was trying to kill you with the amount of homework she gave you weekly. that particular wednesday though, it was worse. you spent a few hours at the library trying to finish your work but it was just way too complicated for you to finish it by yourself.

that's when you noticed the handsome boy was also doing his physics homework; the only difference was that he seemed to know what he was doing... without even wanting to, you had been staring at that boy for a good 3 minutes now, thinking how god was so unfair. "why not me?!" you squealed before you could stop yourself. looking around to see if you had disturbed anyone you notice the boy looked up at you with puppy eyes, confused as to why you seemed so distressed.

he tried to get back to his assignment but your sighs and cries were a bit too distracting. that's when you were suddenly approached by the handsome stranger. "hi.." he awkwardly said. "i couldn't help but notice that you seemed to be struggling with your paper, no?"

damn it. now pretty boy knows you're not as good as you try to make yourself look. "haha.. yea.. physics just isn't my best suit, you know." "totally!" he looked so dreamy with his long brown hair and cute black glasses sitting perfectly on his gorgeous gorgeous nose; you felt as if you were admiring a sculpture. "did you hear what i asked?" huh?? what did pretty boy say? "haha" he chuckled softly with a slight smirk on his face. "pretty boy asked you if you needed help with your homework" the mortified look on your face looked like it was taken straight out of a horror movie. "oh no. i'm so sorry. i did not just say that out loud, did i?" "i'm afraid you did, but don't worry, i think.. you're pretty too" and that's when your brain started short circuiting.

"i'm jake by the way!" jake? like sunghoon's.. nahh. "i'm y/n!" "oh! pretty name for a pretty face" you looked baffled "wha-" "sooo.. did you say you needed help with that?" "yea.. yea.. that would be really great actually!" and that's how you got yourself a studying partner.

if only you knew what was waiting for you in the future...

a/n: thank you so much for reading!! 🫶 sorry for not making this only one part but it's actually taking me longer than i expected to write this 😭

[apomaro-mellow]

Two in the Bush 8

Part 7

Steve’s wardrobe options had gotten more limited as his belly grew, but he tried not to feel some type of way about it. He was still able to dress in a nice shirt and pants and not look too out of place when they brought him to the restaurant. An upscale kind of place that made him wonder how they’d found this place.

“Some guy I know works here”, Billy said as they were taken to their table.

“And he admits that to other people?”, Eddie gasped.

“Watch it, Munson. I’m trying to be nice.”

Steve smiled. He had to admit, just a few months ago, Billy would’ve just decked Eddie and be done with it, ruining the mood and their night. The fact that the three of them were even doing something like this. A date was different than just going out to eat. This was both Eddie and Billy showing their intentions with Steve, and thus their intentions with his pup.

Conversation flowed easily between the three of them, it always did. Eddie was naturally talkative, as was Steve. Billy was less so, but he surprised Steve with what he said sometimes. It made Steve realize he was a good listener.

“So about that one guy…”, Eddie started as their appetizers were replaced with their entrees.

“The alpha redhead or the blonde beta?”, Steve asked.

“Redhead”, Eddie answered.

“You mean Manfred?”, Billy asked.

Eddie snapped his fingers. “Manfred! Yeah! He came in again, trying to micromanage and shit.”

“Isn’t that the same guy who couldn’t tell he was driving on bald tires? And he couldn’t remember which mother gave birth to which kid?”

“The very same! Tires bald as hell and shuffling around like he knows shit.”

“Speaking of kids”, Billy said as he looked to Steve. “You thought of names yet?”

“I’ve thought of several. But I’m not really gonna know until I’m holding them in my arms.” Steve smiled, bringing a hand down to his bump. “I did decide on the names you guys are involved in.”

“Oh?”, Eddie leaned in, intrigued.

Steve nodded, smiling at him. “Whoever the real sire is, the baby will get their last name.” Then he looked at Billy. “And whoever isn’t the father, will get to give them a middle name.”

Billy blinked in surprise. “You’d do that?”

“It only seems fair”, Steve said, looking at the both of them. “Only one of you is the father by blood but you’ve both taken care of me and this pup.”

They went with Steve to doctor appointments whenever they could. They helped him modify his diet, even foregoing some things just so Steve didn’t get jealous. They had massaged his back and feet to relieve aches. Steve had been prepared to do this with just himself and Robin. But with two extra hands, the load was much lighter.

Steve found himself staring at them both more and more. He knew he was lucky, so incredibly lucky. To have not just one but two alphas vying for his hand and fatherhood of his pup. There were plenty of alphas who turned tail at the first mention of the word ‘baby’. Eddie and Billy had not only NOT turned away. They ran at Steve in full force. After dessert, Steve watched them split the bill and then they were on their way home.

He was feeling satisfied in a way he hadn’t in a while. And he didn’t miss the way their gazes lingered on him. Steve wasn’t completely surprised that guys had stopped coming up to him in public. A prominent belly didn’t do much for his dating prospects. And he had gained weight in other places as well. He told himself he was still a catch and that after having the baby he could get right back out there. But sometimes when he looked in the mirror, it was harder to convince himself of that.

The way Billy and Eddie looked at him though, were looking at him right now, it was the same way they always did. It carried the same heat, the same desire. There was a small voice in the back of his head. The one that tried to keep him from making bad decisions. But as they got back home and started towards the stairs, it got quieter and quieter. Steve had forgotten why this was a bad idea in the first place.

Before the other two could part ways to go to their respective rooms, Steve cleared his throat, making them pause. Steve stood at the door of his own room.

“Do you two…wanna come in?”

They entered wordlessly, Billy on him in seconds, lips on his and hands in his hair as Eddie closed the bedroom door. Then Steve felt a warmth at his back that could only be Eddie.

“You sure about this?”, he whispered as he kissed his ear.

Steve broke away from Billy’s mouth to nod. “I’m sure. I know it.”

“What about Robin?”, Billy asked, already unbuttoning Steve’s shirt.

“She’s out. Won’t be back until morning.” She’d told him as much when Steve told her about this date. And at the time, he had assured her there was no need. But she’d given him a look, full of meaning. She knew him better than he knew himself. 

“Then we’ve got all night”, Billy grinned, showing his teeth.

Eddie brought his own teeth out, nipping at Steve’s ear and the back of his neck. He was surrounded on all sides but he didn’t feel caged in. No, he felt embraced. One hand went to Billy’s jaw while the other reached behind, bringing Eddie’s arm around him. As the fell together into bed, a different voice became louder and louder in Steve’s mind.

A voice that said this was the best idea he ever had.

Part 9 FINAL