#and they owe malmancers the full mal angst

[normal-thoughts-official]

next chapter's summary makes me think this is unlikely but i hope mal loses his shit next chapter. he was already on the edge of losing his shit all day today (trying to kill valax, the talks about his fear of fucking up, even if u don't romance him and don't take the diamond scenes) and it draws my attention that the last panel was not MC being swept by the tide but mal's reaction to it (again, regardless of whether or not you romance him)

it's pretty clear to me that mal is fucking terrified of losing MC (or any of his friends) again and he's already carrying survivor's guilt the size of god, made worse by the fact that he's blaming himself for shadow nia. so to (possibly) lose MC again when he was right next to them? i really think it might cause a full breakdown, possibly of the crying variety but, from everything we've seen, most likely of the desperately violent, willing to do anything variety. i wanna see him jump right into the tide and almost get himself killed again. i wanna see him tear the shadow realm apart until he finally founds MC again (since the summary implies MC gets lost from the rest of the group). i wanna see him find MC and immediately try to fucking kill valax

and all I'm saying is: if there was ever a time for a shadow!mal reveal.....