#and then used optic ☆ kitty on him

[epickiya722]

I love that La Brava had to come and show Skeptic who was the hacker villain first in the series. 💕

[pinkanonwrites]

Thinking about the concept of cloth or soft things in general being considered luxury to cybertronians, and just imagining one using their holoform to enter a bedroom for the first time. There a big soft berth that sinks under their weight, an entire pile of warm insulating plush fabric, and even more small soft pads that they put their heads on! Could you imagine their reaction to a carpeted room? They even put soft things on the ground they walk on! It would be like looking at one of ridiculously luxurious mansions that are so loaded up with fancy things that it almost looks like a parody

This conjured up a little idea in me with ROTB Mirage, enjoy!

"Watch your shoulders on the-!"

CRUNCH

"...Door frame." So much for getting your deposit back. Mirage shot you a crooked grin, brushing some of the sheet-rock dust off of his shoulder pauldron.

"Sorry 'bout that, sweetspark. No big deal, you can patch that up no problem!"

When Noah had told you that Mirage was able to change his size you had only partially believed him. After all, according to his own stories, the Mirage that was barely larger than Noah in Peru had also had several significant pieces blasted off of his gargantuan frame. And yet, here he was. Fully repaired, mass-shifted to a mere seven-and-a-half feet tall. And sure, he still had to stoop to avoid taking out your ceiling fan. But here he was, in your meager apartment.

It was an equally unfamiliar locale for Mirage himself, having only caught peeks of your living quarters from the alleyway outside. The shag carpet was plush under his pedes, ridiculously soft to the touch. And sure, he'd owned a few of his own garments back in the Towers, in pre-war time, but it still paled in comparison to your room with its thick curtains, fluffy carpeting, and the dozen or so plush organic creatures littering your bed.

"Do you wanna listen to something? You can sit on the bed, if you want. You're probably too big for my desk chair." You were already rifling through your tapes, gesturing to the bed with your free hand and currently oblivious to Mirage's wide-optic stare. He took a careful seat on the edge and Primus, the entire mattress sunk and molded around his bulky frame. It was heavenly. He took one of your stuffed animals between his servos and squeezed, marveling at the squish.

"Man, I can't believe y'all live like this!" He laughed, draping himself backwards onto your bed with a warning creak. "It's comfy, that's for sure. But I don't think I could sleep on somethin' like this. It might swallow me up mid-recharge. And what's with all these little soft organics?"

"Says the guy who sleeps on the floor of a garage. I'd have aches in muscles I didn't even know existed." You pressed Talking Heads 'Speaking In Tongues' into the player with a familiar click, the beginning lick of Burning Down The House echoing through the tinny speaker as you flopped down next to Mirage. "And you're strangling Hello Kitty. They're cute, and soft, and that's kind of all there is to it? Kids like to play with them, too."

"Huh! Cute. Seems like your style. The whole hab seems like your style, actually. All soft and shit. " He handed you back your slightly-dented Hello Kitty, letting out a lazy ex-vent as his arm wrapped around your shoulders. "Well what should we do now?~ You got me all the way up into your berth, aren't you gonna do somethin' about it?"

You barked out a laugh, turning your head to see Mirage's playfully smarmy grin aimed down at you. "Was that your ploy? Show off your cool alien shape-shifting just so you could get in my bed?"

"That depends. Is it working?~"

"Maybe.~"

[riskyraiker]

hello it’s me againnn! I’m the person that requested the fem reader with tiger alt mode with TFP cons. I was wondering if you could do the same but js with the TFP Autobots? I hope you don’t mind😓

If you can do it again I’d like the same colors, black and white please! Thank you so muchhhh, and thank you for doing my last request!!:D

OH MY I MISSED YOU ALREADY!!! I LOVED THE REQUEST AND NOW IT'S ANOTHER ONE😍😍 Here you go, lovely<3

--------------------------------------------

Optimus Prime

Isn't sure what to think of you, but if you stand up for them he sees you as an ally.

Is wary of you when you first meet, but show signs of not being the enemy and you're almost immediately on his good side. (Much as Arcee doesn't like it)

The first time he sees your tiger form? He likes your choice of colors and alt form but doesn't show it. (Surprise?)

Questions why haven't you shown it before, but accepted your answer of "Thought you wouldn't need the info"

Now if you were in a relationship he would show his fondness of your alt mode. Ask for pets and you'll get them :D

Sees your alt mode as a power move in fights yet not fully supportive of it being over used in battles

In a platonic way: He cares about you alt mode tiger or not

Romantic way: He loves you too much to put it into words and admires your strength

Ratchet

When he sees you in your bipedal mode he doesn't bat an eye (He does, you look weirdly pretty/handsome)

Show him your alt mode and his optics might pop out right then and there.

Thinks you might be reckless since your alt mode is an animal, BUT if you're calm and collected he might grow on you easier

"Ratch can I help you with something atleast!" You mumble at the medic. "Ep ep ep! You will do no hard labor until I say so!"

Cares about you sooner or later and shows it by being grumpy when you get hurt. (He's just panicking alright?!)

In a platonic way: He would care about your aft like the old dad he is.

In a romantic way: He might say he prefers you instead of the tiger but loves both ways equally.

Bumblebee

you guys are in a war so he doesn't let his guard down until you prove yourself to be on the Autobot side.

When you do he jumps on your back if you're big enough to handle his weight. Rodeo time!

Grew to like you most likely the quickest! And anytime you're in tiger form IN the base he rushes over and pets you behind your ear. (Right where you like it!)

Has your back in the field and if you get hurt he shows some of that scout fighting skill he has.

If you didn't get a berthroom suitable enough for you he let you sleep in his, with you curled up like a dog or lying on your side like a kitty.

In a platonic way: He thinks you're a cool sibling figure! And supports you through anything!

In a romantic way: A flustered little boy! Loves you and won't be afraid to "sting" somebody if they hurt you!

Arcee

Trust issues! So grew on you in the last 3 of the team.

The moment you show your alt mode and haven't told about it she might tell you off, but if you told them before hand she might think you're what the team needs. (More firepower)

If you save her in the battlefield her respect for you does go up, but if you actually get hurt in the process she might let you in and let's her walls go down when she talks to you.

She starts to care about you like she cared for tailgate and cliffjumper. And if she tells you about them it's a sign she trusts you. Take it for granted!

The longer you guys hang out the more attached you get.

She likes you're choice of color. Maybe not her style but it fits you and she won't shut up about it when you get cleaned up the first time.

In a platonic way: she trusts and you trust her. It's a best friend bond, don't break it!

In a romantic way: she lost too much she can't lose you too so she might be stubborn just for your safety, BUT she loves you alt mode different or the same.

Bulkhead and wheeljack (not polyamorous)

Oh these two. You met these two in your alt mode. The moment you show signs of not shooting or attacking they LOVE your alt mode!

Bulkhead likes your coloring while wheeljack admired your sharp teeth that could tear a vehicon apart in a few kliks.

Don't even try to go against the idea of wheeljack riding on your back into battle😭💀

Bulkhead thinks he's too heavy to be on your back but the moment you sprint between his legs get him on your back and run he loves every klik of it!

Wheeljack definitely prefers your tigermode but bipedal works too! Bulkhead loves both styles!

In a platonic way: Bulkhead would carry you when wheeljack has been on your back too much and there's a deep slope on your back. Both care about you like you're a sparkling but now you could tear them apart easily

In a romantic way: Bulkhead gives you pets, pets, pets and pets. Supports you in anything you do (even a walk) and is your support beam in anything. While wheeljack jokes about riding something different which just makes you lose focus in anything you do. (Yes i hc that he has a dirty mind)

Smokescreen

Is containing his excitement, but you could see it on his face he wasn't doing that good of a job when he saw you IN alt mode the first time.

"you're a good guy? Okay AWESOME!" And he's on you, checking your mouth, servos holding your mouth open to look at your teeth until he realizes he's most likely breaking boundaries.

Follows you like a lost puppy when you get to base asking all kinds of questions. (You can make them up i'm too tired for this😭)

If you're outside of your berthroom you are getting petted and stratched 24/7. Not hard to guess by who.

Loves your style and how you chose a tiger as your alt form. I mean a tiger! Look dude they're a tige- okay im rambling. (100% smokescreen energy)

Optimus will still be his number one (unless you start to date.)

In a platonic way: he is now your son. No obligations

In a romantic way: he loves you more than anything he used to love "the most possible" before.

Ultra Magnus

Has his guns on you even if optimus told to stand down. Literally the LAST one to grow on you.

If you're calm and collected, he let's you do whatever you do. If you're a wheeljack no.2 go to patrol!

Save his aft and he might think he's in loooove. (Buries the thought with the heaviest material he can find.)

Takes you on missions if he gets to choose only if you're calm and collected😘

Enjoys your presence when he's known you long enough and won't hold a grudge against you forever.

In a platonic way: he respects you. You're close to optimus on the list.

In a romantic way: he ain't confessing. You do it! He's a commander he stays serious even if it takes everything from him. Takes a while to open into the relationship as well.

--------------------------

AN: OH MY LORD I'M NOT DEAD?! Here have this when it's 1am local time for me :') HOPE YOU ENJOY TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES!!!

[tamsinbeybey-she-no-porcupine]

bbc Ghosts tattooshop capvers au

okay completely based on @captain-rickbond amazing modern Caphrey drawings:

My brain ran with an Ghosts tattoo shop au and though it's Caphrey bffs of course my brain made it Capvers (no one saw that coming I'm sure😉):

-Robin: tattoo artist style old school has one big lightning tattoo over his whole body nothing else. Does also do stick n poke.

-Humphrey: tattoo artist traditional and neo traditional does classic paintings on the side that he sells ,covered in tattoos himself (based on cap rickbonds drawings)

-Kitty tattoo artist. Style: fineline, floral work, dot work , watercolour and cartoon style

-Mary tattoo artist style: black work specialised in tattoos that look like old book illustrations and sketch style, loves doing witchy tattoos

-Allison tattoo artist photorealism style I. Colour and black and grey

-Cap: store manager

-Thomas: that one customer who gets turned away frequently because he wants face, neck or hand tattoos as his first tattoo

-Julian customer three tattoos one heart with Margot one with Rachel and some pun/innuendo very close if not directly on his gentleman's excuse me. Robin did all of his tattoos

-Fanny: friend of cap does like Humphreys paintings and comes by when she wants to chat, gossip or ask Humphrey to do a portrait of one of her pets (on canvas obviously)

-Pat: customer. friends with all of them no tattoos over shirt lines because he works in a bank. His tattoos are mainly humourous about stuff he loves in cartoon style kitty is his main artist.

-Obi the shop apprentice focuses on graphic style (tattoos that look like graphic design) and / or trash polka

The story:

Cap has few tattoos from different artists. Fineline flowers from kitty and a date that holds great importance to him done by Humphrey, a morsecode tattoo on his chest etc. his tattoos are not visible to others normally. They are small and personal.

Robin has a certificate in how to tattoo scars and made all of his artists learn as well

Havers just moved there and wants to symbolise a new start in life with something beautiful coming out of the scars of the past (upper body/arm scars not the face ones)

He walks in for a consultation and is a bit nervous because first it has to be determined what can be done, if the scars can be integrated and if the goal is to fade them optically or use them to enhance the picture.

It's a busy day and stuff has gone wrong so there's a waiting period and cap gives him tea and they get talking and find out they're both ex military and he's relaxed and smiling by the time robin comes to collect him

During the consultation Havers let's it shine through that he's not exactly sure what he wants style wise so robin who's very old school in wanting to challenge his artists calls them one by one to look at him and asks them to design something that symbolises his wish of a new start

He even calls cap in to ask something about if they still have a specific needle type. Cap sees Havers shirtless and gets extremely flustered. And everyone's like "??" Because normally cap runs the shop like a well oiled machinery but now he can't remember if they have that needle size

Havers returns the week after to look at the designs and the main themes are phoenixes or flowers (a lot of dandelions and lotuses)And cap can see (because he keeps looking🤭) that Havers is a bit overwhelmed with choosing so he brings them all tea and starts chatting with him and it quickly turns out what he really loves from which design so cap suggests they do a collab piece on Havers. And everyone whose in the design gets really excited and of course it means that Havers has to come back for another consultation. By that point the others have caught on that cap is talking to and mentioning that one customer a bit often.

Havers returns the next week and for some reason he got the appointment wrong and is almost an hour early (oh dear) and so that very handsome store manager who is bored on this very slow day takes it upon himself to drink tea with him and chat telling him that he loves the meaning behind his tattoo and that he's in good hands and it'll look awesome on him and he shows him his own tats which makes kitty run to the others and whisper because normally no one gets to see caps tats.

The design is wonderful and Havers loves it but because of size and difficult level aka sitting through the extra spicy pain it's gonna be done in numerous small sessions. And every time cap and him find time to talk to each other or shooting glances at each other.

His colleagues try to get Cap to ask Havers out before it's too late but cap is like that's unprofessional and the guy is here to get a tattoo not be hit on by staff.

With the sessions and the healing process it takes months before the tat is finished and it's very clear to everyone else around them that the attraction between the two is very much mutual

And on the last appointment cap wants to ask him out before he possibly never sees him again but everything goes wrong because Thomas demands that this new poem of his has to go on his neck and Robin argues with him and Julian Fawcett turns up drunk for his appointment and Alison has morning sickness and so cap who waited anxiously for Havers to come pay and say bye had to do the payment real quick and wants to say bye and ask him but then Julian smashes a vase from the counter because he got in on the argument between Thomas and Robin and Havers at one point slips out sad that he didn't got to talk to Cap one last time.

Cap is feeling a bit down over the next weeks and everyone is trying to cheer him up.

A few weeks later Havers is suddenly there again because he lost some lines during healing and Cap wasn't even aware that there was an appointment but Humphrey is like oops forgot to tell you.

The actual appointment is over suspiciously fast. (Aka Humphrey met Havers somewhere accidentally and used to meddle)

And then it's time to say goodbye and Cap can't get the words out and Anthony looks very anxious and he's almost at the door but cap calls out to him, Havers whipping around and cap is like I eh oh well I meant to say...we'll be having a flash day on the third if you're interested.

And something about calling him back just gives Anthony the kick he needed and he informs him that he doesn't think he's the type just yet to get random tats because he's more after meaning. New beginning specifically at the moment which also means new people in his life and there's one person he really likes and wants to get to know even better and then he asks Cap out.

Over the next two years the teasing sentence "cap stop flirting with your boyfriend we're about to open" can be heard almost every day in the shop at which point Havers leans over the counter to collect his daily goodbye kiss before leaving for work.

Havers design btw I'm thinking a phoenix made out of flowers like a flower bomb gone off all over his flank and pieces on his chest and upper arm like flames out of flowers everywhere around the actual bird where there is scarring.

During those two years Havers gets a tattoo of the date of his first appointment underneath the phoenix.

And after that the only clearly visible tattoo Cap has that is done as a collab and on two people who don't have many tattoos (the absolute exception Robin makes which drives Thomas insane) are the wedding ring tattoos for Cap and Havers.

[dweebfics]

🍋☁️Cheetor x Cybertronian Fem! reader (ROTB)

What's up peeps

I have been so busy with life, I have not been able to make more stories. Unless I get adrenaline motivation like I did this one then its a different story.

I have been recently Cheetor deprived, not enough good fanfiction of this good boy, he deserves more attention. 😖😔

I literally wrote 2,000+ words, that's how motivated I was...😅

Let's see what I can create next.

Enjoy the fic.

Warning: Lemon and fluff

Cheetor's P.O.V

This was it... The battle was done... but far from over. We defeated Unicron for now, but we have to be ready for what comes next... I suddenly feel someone step next to me, I looked up and see y/n from the Prime's team looking at me.

"We did it.." The fem said in a whisper that I was able to catch on. I simply nodded and got closer to her. Since we were done with what was started, I wanted to tell her what I felt towards her in the short amount we were together... But something was stopping me from doing so... When I decided to speak up, Primal harshly grabbed my shoulder to congratulate me on a mission well done and y/n turned around to speak to Arcee. I simply took a deep breath and hanged my head low.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Reader's P.O.V

We all went back to the camp we made next to the village to rest for the night and plan to head out in the morning. The villagers made food and played music for us and the humans for the victory we claimed in this day. I looked at them being happy, Arcee then comes and sit down next to me and nudges me.

"Hey... Kitty over there hasn't stopped looking at you. I think someone likes you" As she said that I looked to the side and his ears perks up and quickly looks to the side. I giggled and looked back at Arcee.

"Well, maybe the feeling is mutual" I said as I leaned back and placed my weight on my arms to look up at the stars.

"Why don't you tell him something? We are leaving back to New York tomorrow... Peru is pretty far for visiting in the future... Maybe, I don't know, make it count tonight? Just saying" Arcee got up and walked away from me after saying that, I looked down and just stared at her walking away thinking of her words. I looked back at Cheetor and this time we made optic contact; he slowly perks up as I stayed staring for a bit. I then motioned to him with my helm to follow me and started to get up.

I walked towards a river that was a bit distant, I looked back and did not see Cheetor nearby. Maybe he decided not to come. I kept my pace towards the river until I arrived and sat down in front of the medium current. 6 minutes pass then I heard rustling behind me and gave a side look to see the cheetah's spots in my peripheral vision.

"I was starting to think you weren't coming" I said as I looked back at my peds inside the river feeling the freshness of the water.

"I gave you a head start before I got up, you know.. not make it look suspicious." He said while sitting next to me.

"uhu.. I understand" I said as I looked back up at him. I noticed he was a bit unsteady in his sitting position, am I making him uncomfortable or nervous?

"It's very beautiful out here... All this nature and the beautiful sky. You don't get to see a lot of stars in New York with how crowded it is of buildings, plus we always have to be in hiding." I said breaking the brief silence.

"Yeah, it really is" He said, when I looked at him, he was looking at me. I smiled down at his adorable gesture.

"You know.." I perked up at the sudden voice of the cheetah and gave him my full attention.

"I have been meaning to tell you something since we won the battle of Unicron.. or actually before we went on... but I was so scared." He explained to me and I placed my servo on his shoulder for comfort.

"You know you can tell me anything... I did bring you out here because I also have something to say, but also because I noticed you kind of staring back there" I said and he chuckled.

"Hehe... sorry about that, I did not mean to stare... I was kind of mesmerized." He said and I looked at him blinking a few times, it kind of caught me off guard but expected. I scooched a little closer catching his attention.

"What I wanted to say was... Ever since you arrived, I can't explain myself. But I have been so attracted to you and you have been on my mind nonstop since I first lay my optics on you... It might sound insane, but it is what I feel. I know it has only been a few days we have been together as a team... but I wanted to tell you how I felt. I understand if you don't..." I made him stop his words by placing my servo on top of his clawed paw. This made him look at me.

"Why don't you transform so I can kiss you properly?" I said, Cheetor was taken back, but instantly transformed and sat closer to me. I gently touched his freckled face plate and softly brought him towards me until our dermas touched softly. It was so smooth and tender... Our dermas felt like they were meant to be together. I slightly separated us and looked at him as he had a dreamy look on his face plate and he was purring. I chuckled when I looked at him.

"W-what...?" He asked getting flustered.

"Nothing, you're just so adorable. I just heard your purr; I wonder how you sound growling." I said and looked down at the river again.

"I mean... I can make that happen." He said with a sudden confidence. I smiled at him and he brought me closer, I closed the distance between us again, this time the kiss being a bit more intense. He suddenly grabbed me by my waist and brought me over his lap facing him, making me straddle him. I then felt him grinding our plates together.

"What an impatient little kitten you are... We just started" I said breaking our kiss and instantly attacking his neck cables with bites and kisses.

"I- I... can't help myself... Sorry. You're d-driving me crazy with what you're doing." He said stuttering. I stopped my kisses and went to his audial.

"Don't apologize, I like to see you all flustered under me actually" Cheetor froze completely and I felt him get warm under my touch. I giggled and continued to attack his neck. Cheetor began to whimper under me and left out a breathy moan as soon as I bit down on a certain juicy cable.

"F-frag.. y/n." Cheetor exclaimed, I backed up from his neck and gently pushed him down to the ground by his chest. I looked Cheetor up and down like a hungry predator looking at his pray, making the mech gulp a bit. I grabbed his servos and I placed them on my hips, Cheetor grabs on tightly and pull me down to grind against my plating. I threw my helm back with a moan at the sudden contact.

"Primus y/n, you're so beautiful..." Cheetor said.

"You really think so?" I asked as I looked down at the mech and started to unlatch my breast plate armor until my mounds were exposed to him.

"Mjm" He said without taking his optics away from my chest. I giggled and leaned forward, breaking his trance with a kiss. I then felt a shift of his servos from my hips to my aft and started to knead on them, making me moan into the kiss. Suddenly, I was under Cheetor and he made my legs spread a bit by him being between them. I did not had time to react as he started to attack my neck.

"Primus... you taste so delicious. I can't get enough..." He said as he started to trail his kisses down my frame until he reached my pelvic plating and releases a long and very wet lick against my plating, looking like a kitten asking permission to eat its meal. My head was spinning at all the lustful feeling I had flowing within my frame. Cheetor comes back to my faceplate and grabs me by the back of my neck to bring me into an intense and sloppy wet kiss. I moaned into the kiss as I felt his free servo playing with my nub and having our panels grind against each other, causing such an amazing friction, it automatically opened my panel, releasing my valve to the cold forest air. He instantly notices this and plays with my node, doing little circles to it.

"F-frag.. Cheetor.." I moaned out, not able to hold myself the immense pleasure. Suddenly, he started to trace my inner valve lips with two of his digits, making me bite down on my bottom derma.

"You even sound delicious with the sounds you're making... I want to hear more." He said as he dove his head to one of my breast and started to nibble on one of my nubs, I opened my optics wide, it was so much, but so good all together.

"Ah.. AH~ Sc-rap.. Ch-e... etor"

"Mmm~Can't even speak now, can ya?" He asked teasingly going back to what he was doing. I started to run my digits through his fur on his helm, encouraging him to keep doing. I then felt two digits attempting to intrude my entrance, I allowed it by opening my legs for better access. Cheetor inserted two clawed digits into me, I moaned loudly at the intrusion. This making Cheetor do a fast pace suddenly. With all this teasing... I'm already reaching my climax. It's so intense, I can almost feel the knot within my pelvis about to burst.

"Ch-EETOR!" Then he stopped... I looked at him scared that maybe something bad happened.

"Nu-uh... You can't overload just yet" I threw him a "are you serious" face and he chuckled.

"Don't worry kitten, you'll have your overload." He said as he leaned into my audial receptor.

"I just prefer to see you overload around my spike" he said in such a sensual and low tone of voice, it sent shivers down my spine. I looked down and see a very large and throbbing member starting to align against my entrance and pushed against it. It was slightly painful in the beginning, but it subsided rather quickly, much better say, it was worth the pain. I placed all my weight on my forearms, I wanted to be elevated while still laying down on the ground.

Cheetor retracted his member all to have it shoved suddenly and harshly against me, he started his pace like this until he got a good rhythm going. The intensity of his hips thrust had my whole frame shaking, my breast bouncing at his every move, my legs trembling of the pure pleasure this mech was making me feel.

"By the Gods... What a sight I have in front of me. You look so good, taking me so well Kitten..." The praises have me throwing my helm back, all I was releasing were incoherent words and sounds. My mind was not even thinking of speaking at the moment. This mech is going to make me overload and it's going to be intense.

"Be a good little femme and say my name... Who's making you whimper and moan like a crazed and needy femme"

"Ch-e Ah~"

"What was t-that kitten? didn't quite catch that"

"Cheet..s.. Ah frag~" I attempted to say his name, but I couldn't I was so close. He notices this and grabs me by the hips tightly and started to thrust in an upward/downward motion hitting every spot within me.

"That's it, overload for me baby, scream for me"

"CHEETOR! FRAG! I can't anymore.. I- I-'m so cl-" I couldn't finish my sentence as I felt my fluid gushing out onto his spike, this making Cheetor growl at the sudden tightness of my walls. He instantly pulls out and gushes all of his transfluid onto my chest, decorating my breast with his fluids.

We were both a panting mess one on top of the other. It was so intense, but so good.

"Frag~ y/n... T-that was... wow" Cheetor said at a lose of words. I ended up laying down still breathing hard, all I could say was.

"Agreed" and I proceeded to close my optics slightly. I felt Cheetor moving towards me and takes me into his embrace. I was resting my helm against his chest, I could hear his spark still pulsing fast. I felt so safe and warm in his embrace. Its a good thing I listened to what Arcee told me.

[cozzzynook]

Little hurt/comfort

It had been weeks since that day when the wreckers not only greeted one mech but two into their ranks. Kup was quickly walking down the short hallway carrying a tray of some fresh energon, the older mech was quietly humming a tune as he took the familiar winding path towards the small, welcoming recovery rooms. Using his pede he would carefully opened the door stepping inside only to spot a sulking Perceptor who was just blankly staring at the medical pod where his sparkling slept.

"Morning lad, I brought you some energon" Kup would set down the tray on the small table before turning to slowly walk over while allowing his field to reassure the new carrier, Kup was the only mech Perceptor trusted at this moment he couldn't ruin it now. "How is the little bittie doing?"

Perceptor lowered his gaze as he pulled arms closer together. "The medic say he's still weak but growing stronger each day..." He then quickly used a servo to wipe away a couple of now drying tears from his face before turning to face kup. "I still think it's my fault, if only I'd been stronger then he wouldn't-"

"No no, none of that" Kup shook his helm as he placed a gentle comforting servo onto Perceptor's shoulder. "It wasn't your fault Percy, you went into emergence early and weren't prepared at all. It just happened...no one is at fault here" Kup then softly smiled as he felt Percy relax a little despite still shaking slightly.

Perceptor just let out a long tired sigh as he returned his gaze to look at his sick sparkling, it pained his spark that he couldn't hold his bittie for long as his spark yearned to hold the little one close. Instead he just watched on while his digits traced new healing scars along his lighting frame. "I wanted to ask you Kup, have you...found him yet?"

The old mech let out a short grumble as he shook his helm. Kup's field quickly became jagged and protective as he quickly glanced at the door with a huff. "No we haven't found anything yet but when we do I'm going to tear that mech apart. He won't be able to lay another servo on you or your sparkling"

"Thank you" Percy gave a soft smile only for his attention to be suddenly snapped back to the medical pod when he heard soft coos coming from his bittie. He quickly sat up and rushed over carefully opening the pod to reach out to hold his sparkling only to pause when small blue optics met his. "Well...hello there"

The sparkling's face quickly calmed as he saw the strange red blur, he quickly cooed again reaching out with tiny servos as his bond told him that red shape was his carrier. Perceptor let out a soft chuckle as he carefully picked up his sparkling being mindful of the wires that were connect to his bittie's spark. He then just watched in awe as the sparkling just snuggled closer softly clicking and cooing as he familiarized himself with his carrier.

"Well, would you look at that" Kup smiled as he joined Percy's side. "He's already got his optics open and is looking for trouble, I'd bet he's going to be a right fire ball when he starts walking" The old mech then softly chuckled as he turned to look at Perceptor again who was just beaming with love and pride. "So, have you picked out a name for the little mech?"

"I was thinking...Hot Rod" Percy then used a digit carefully petting his bittie's helm who softly trilled and began to purr at the soft touch.

"Hot Rod, eh?" Kup just gave a little nod as he leaned down to inspect the sparkling closer with a smile. "Well then, welcome to the wreckers Hot Rod you'll fit right in kiddo"

ᓚᘏᗢ

Thank you kitty, this is wonderful angst that ended beautifully.

You’re invited to my transformers party again

[theamityelf]

The child Kamukuras (Warriors of Hope, possibly called "Lil Ultimate Hopes") sometimes ambush Makoto, as a game, since he's the only one of their predecessors who lets them do it. (Byakuya or Izuru stop them from doing it to Makoto, too, when they're around to see it, but Mahiru and Nagito fully let it happen.)

They surround him, tie him up, and threaten him with violence– which of course they don't end up actually doing. (Nagisa only tags along because Izuru expressly ordered him to play with his friends. He would untie Makoto, if he asked, but he doesn't.)

Kotoko, completely stoically, opens a switchblade and says, "My new knife has Hello Kitty on it."

"Yes, it's cute," Makoto replies.

"It is. I like it. What if I used it to sever your optic nerve?"

"Then I would be unable to see, and also I would die."

"I'll bet I can do it without killing you," Masaru interjects.

"Yes, but will you?"

"Probably not."

"You're supposed to beg for mercy," Kotoko adds. "It's not as fun if you don't beg for mercy."

(Monaca is hugging Makoto the whole time this happens, because, while mirroring "real" families she's seen in public and on TV, she learned that she actually likes hugging her family. Especially Byakuya and Nagisa, who never know how to react. Nagito and Makoto are the only ones who hug back, but Izuru and Mahiru will pat her on the head. Anyway, Makoto can't hug back right now, because he's tied up.)

(Jataro is just pulling hairs from Makoto's head one by one. It doesn't particularly hurt, and it's not meant to.)

[phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess]

CONCEPT

Show us Alastor and Mimzy making up by getting into deeply drunken and destructive shenannigans that result in at least two major explosions, a fire, several levelled blocks and more dead sinners than you can imagine

Neither of them could legally drive when alive, and never bothered to learn when they arrived in hell, so that's also extremely dangerous

Husk is initially sent to try and stop them, but he's bribed with The Good Drinks and ends up whooping in the backseat of a car whose windscreen is more blood and viscera than it is glass now

Show us Angel talking Vaggie down from going to deal with them, because Charlie is horrified at the carnage as Voxtech has cottoned on to the situation and is pretending this is some sort of rampage

Vox is trying to use the right angles, but its obvious the overlord involved is just having a good time

Still, they're heading a tad too close to the territories of the few overlords they have good standing with (Zestial, Carmilla, hells, they knocked over Susan's mailbox in Cannibal Town and only hers so Rosie is Not Pleased because the woman is ComplainingTM to her about her Red Haired Pet)

Angel asks the Short King, aka Royal Daddy to drop him and Cherri close to the chaotic trio, because he's also the only one who might be able to safely stop the car without being splatted. Because he can see that the trajectory was heading right at Vee Tower, and given how that could piss off Val, Angel wasn't gonna risk it.

Also, he's been that shitfaced before and knows you just don't make great choices like that and Vox seems to be countin' on it. You don't work in Angel's profession without being able to clock a creeper... might not be able to do nothin' if they pay the right price, but you could just Tell.

Drones frizzle as a lensflare, the kind of which hasn't been seen since the recent Star Trek Movies, sears their optical wires. Losing signals and providing barely there distorted imagery.

"Not being a very good parental figure, here, bellhop..." Lucifer grins, hand on the front of the vehicle as the wheels spin a few seconds longer. It strains and sputters before he presses a tad more firmly on the metal, and the whole thing dies with an angry 'kra-bang'.

"Why... your shhhhhortness, to what do we..." a truly devastating insult trails off mid-sentence, as the Overlord notices his shadow is making faces at the king, which is far funnier and easier to focus on. "Hmmm? Oh yes... decided to work on Hell's transportation concerns... personally...? Or is it angel-ally? Devilally? What do you fall under, hmmm?"

"He c-can fall undah me any-hic-time..." Mimzy mumbled, crawling over Alastor to get out of the vehicle and rolling onto the pavement, giggling. "Whoo!"

"Ah, looks like we're at Defcon Whoo..." Angel mutters to Cherri, who howls with laughter. She manages to calm down enough to grab hold of the shorter sinner, pulling her upright without much preamble. This ain't her fourth rodeo and all that.

Angel peers in the backseat to find a jovial Husk tryinng to catch his own tail as it wiggles past his eyes. He's flat on his back, swiping at it, and Angel's heart just about pounds out of his chest because fuck that's cute... he tries to get a covert video with his fourth hand.

"Hey Whiskers, you wanna come outta the car for a minute? We got some stuff you might like at the hotel..." he coos, catching Husk's attention.

The Stuff is water, painkillers for the inevitable headache and a soft couch to sleep on with The Bucket next to it. In fact, all three of them are likely to get the royal treatment if they can just contain them before any pissed off overlords came alooking for who was causing the distruction.

But Husk didn't need to know that, let his blissed out kitty self assume there was more booze. Angel and Cherri were the downright experts at motivating blissed out friends to safety. Noone left behind and all that.

The cat-like mrrrph? the grugff bartender makes nearly takes Angel out, he has to clutch at his chest for a second. He wants this old ass cat so damn bad, sunsets and heart eyes and all that shit... fuck, he thought that was just stuff romantasy authors made up for sales. But now he wanted to get this idiot home, and safe, and maybe see if he'd make that noise again when sober.

Did he purr? Angel needs to know So Bad.

"You uh you good there, Cocaine?"

"Coca-... oh, it's Angel Dust, Short King. Close but no pinata that time, hah!" he wavves the angel's worried tone away. "Just got struck by how cute Husk here is when he's super blitzed... did you hear that noise? Like Keekee when she's lookin' for pets!"

The King's attention fell on Husk, as Cherri is heard physically being hurled around in the background by a flapper who decided it was Dance Time!

"He did? When was that?"

Husk, confused by the attention and not really using his BrainTM at the moment, repeats the noise instead of what the sinner clearly thought was a query with actual words.

Lucifer's eyes go roundn and shiny, and yeah, now Angel can see exactly where Charlie got it. "HE DOES!"

"You should... hear the other sounds... he can make... if you get one of the red dots..." Alastor helpfully advised, climbing out of the car to drape over the open door. He summons the item with a flourish and it smacks the king in the forehead.

"Oh you fucke-..."

"Hey, hang on ya highness, I don't actually think he was being a dick..." Angel says, holding out a free hand as he watched Alastor's confused expression fall into a frown at his empty hand. "Just couldn't aim like this... how the heck they managed to do this much damage while this outta it, I'm not sure."

Gunfire blasted from a sidestreet. "There's the slut!"

Mimzy and Angel both snapped back a sharp, "Hey!"

The ragtag group pauses, a mix of saurian sinners and a handful of what must be owned imps, as they glance between them. /Several flush and look elsewhere as they realise that's The Angel Dust.

"Er, the short whore, not you, sir..." says a rifle-wielding imp in a smart suit, appearing torn between fury at Mimzy and mild awe at Angel. "We came to get her for the boss... she ain't getting away with her shit again. Lost too many of our guys to her nonsense."

"Well, thank you but, I can't letcha do that. She's a.... friend of a friend. And that friend might eatcha in the least sexy way possible, unless you're into vore." Angel says, subtly warding them off.

But it's too late, Mimzy's noticed the interlopers. So has the Radio Demon.

"Al... c'n you help lil ol' me? I mighta... devoured a guy... or six... but he had it comin'!"

"Ah Mimzy my dear... you really know... how to pick them." Said the swaying eldritch horror as it unfolded from the everyday portable form, tendrils wildly lashing out and taking out both thugs, nearby cars and several buildings. "Do stand still..."

They were. Fear held them fast.

"Oh for fuck's sake..." Lucifer groaned, clearly over this whole situation. He might like Hunk and sure technically Missy was under the Get Them Home Safe Plan from Charlie, but dealing with a drunken overlord like this was... ridiculous. Why was this his afterlife? Had Father sent the bellhop specifically to remind Lucifer he was meant to be suffering?

He snaps his fingers and sends the few assailants not being dragged into shaows by chittering poppet things with big teeth, to the distant corners of Pentagram City. Separated like naughty kids on time out (thank you Belphagor for teaching Lilly and Lucifer about that one or Charlie would have turned out MUCH worse).

Angry red eyes waver over Lucifer and a few tendrils try to swat him, or at least, possibly the several Lucifers he's seeing.

"Okay big guy, look at the pretty shiny angel... over here... we're going to calm down because if you don't it would be a Shame if I had to beat your smug ass into next week to make sure you didn't go do anything else stupid." Lucifer sing-songed, really hoping that the sinner would choose Violence. Please let him choose Violence. Char would forgive him.

"Oi, you can't goad him into a drunken fist fight, that's cheatin' and I'm telling Charlie!" Angel calls up to him, and Lucifer's expression falls into a furious little pout.

"Well.... fine. What do you suggest, oh wrangler of the drunken?"

Angel tries so hard not to laugh openly at the childish frustration on the King's face. Yeah, Charlie was like 90% her dad, from what Angel could see.

"Well, you got his attention... see if he'll like, shrink down or whatever that's called, if not you might have to just portal us back to the hotel supersized!" angel yells up at the former angel.

Lucifer was annoyed. He could have been finishing off the replacement helper for Charlie, now that Dazzle was... well, Razzle was so lonely. It wasn't a Replacement of course, but the little creature might help fill the void left.

Shaking his head he decided to try, for Charlie. "Alright, let's try this..."

He levitates one of the shadow-mauled corpses up to them. "Hey Al... if I let you have a snack, would you calm down enough to shrink for us? All the sinners who came for, er, Misty, are gone. I poofed them away. No need to be all... big."

He notes that the cannnibal's eyes followed after the corpse, and he moves it slightly just to confirm. "You promise to settle down if I let you have a snack? We gotta get back to the hotel, bud... Charlie's not big on..." Something explodes a street over from the direction the trio had come from. "...hijinks like this."

Something like a rumble rippled between them, and Lucifer took that as capitulation. He tossed the semi-corpse and turned away, avoiding seeing whatever level of chewing involved those wet pops and snaps.

He felt the moment Alastor let go of the larger form, it was like a shift in the electromagnetic and magical fields, something he was unfortunately sensitive to based on the fact he'd had a hand in crafting those (along with a LOT of other things in the universe).

Angel was there immediately, slinging an arm around Alastor's shoulders in an effort to both steer the other and ensure he didn't sneakily resize himself just to spite the king. It was a testament to their growing companionship that Alastor didn't rip that arm right off... however, the true icing on the cake was the fact that the unexpected contact startled a soft, confused bleat out of the Overlord.

Dual waves of 'aw that's super cute' and 'I am holding this over his head for the rest of eternity' struck the King. Finally, he had something on the red motherfucker!

Angel looked slightly stunned, and squeezed Al tightly for a second, just to hear the repeated but slightly angrier sound. He turns to Lucifer with wide eyes. "Didja know he could do that? Holy fuck, these two are gonna be the second death of me..."

Cherri has a giggling Mimzy under one arm and is carefully hurling cherry bombs at the few sputtering drones still valiantly attempting to spy on them despite the damage angelic light had caused.

"They're pretty fuckin' cute, I'll give you that!" She calls out. "So what's the plan? If I let this sheila go, she'll be flat out like a lizard drinking... but getting this lot back to the Hotel will be a hard yakka if we try by foot."

"True... unless you wanna conjure a limo or somethin', ya Majesty?"

"Huh? Oh, no. No I'm just going to portal us all back to the hotel." Lucifer said, blinking back into the moment.

A blast of radio warble made them cringe from proximity. "No-...nonsense... let's take my shadows... thy're so... reliabl-... reliab-... we'll get there somewhat intact!" Alastor grins, grabbing hold of Angel and sending shadow tendrils out towards Cherri, Mimzy and Lucifer.

"Wait, no! No drunk driving in my kingdom!" Lucifer shouts, as he's pulled into a soupy black nothingness and left to tumble aimlessly in all directions. Well, not quite. There's a tether there, linking him back to the other screaming voices and giggling flapper he knows are there but can't quite see.

Lucifer rolls back into reality dazed and bruised as he falls from the ceiling of the lobby. Cherri and Mimzy fall sideways from a wall, and then Angel lands face-first on the nearby couch next to a startled Charlie.

Husk is not so lucky, the cat reappears at the bar, shooting upwards from out of the void in the floor as if thrown. He lands on all fours with claws out and tail fluffed, seconds from hissing, next to a wildly confused Vaggie.

"Wait, shit, we've lost Al..." Angel says, looking around.

"Hang on, now I've gotten a feel for the shadowy bullshit I think I can grab him. He's probably not able to remanifest a physical form while that drunk..." Lucifer sighs, hauling himself upright and heading to one of the wiggling shadow portals on the wall.

He jams himself in to about mid-torso and holds out a ball of light in his hand, searching for-... yeah, that'd be the idiot. There's a pair of hazy red eyes above a taut stitched smile... nothing else though.

"Alright, come over here, bellhop and touch my hand. I can pull you back into your physical body, if you want... unless this is easier... but then yo umight get lost in here if you're drunk soooooo..."

His rambling made the patch of sentient darkness drift close enough for Lucifer to snag and pull back through. He forgot about the reality of having another person land on you, and that they might be an angular motherfucker whose bony self could puncture holes in a bouncy castle if he landed wrong.

The wind left him all at once as they hit the floor. Still, the fact it seemed to startle another deer sound out of the other felt like payment enough. This was too good not to bring up in their next verbal spat...

Charlie looked intrigued but not surprised at the noise. "Oooh, thanks for that, Dad! And ohmygosh, is that a TAIL?!"

The end of that sentence went near hypersonic, and the glassware around them rattled ominously.

Vaggie looked perturbed. "What the fuck was that?"

"Oh, oh, oh! It's this little bleat, he made it when Rosie gave him a hug the other day in Cannibal Town, you'd think he weighed nothing the way she picked him up!"

"Oh, is that so...?" Angel said, filing that one away for later. "By the way, guess who makes cute little kitty noises when he's super drunk?" He gestures like a magician's assistant to Husk.

Charlie's eyes are going to roll out of her head if they get any rounder. "He does?!" A glass shatters behind them.

Lucifer shoves Alastor off him and rolls upright far too fluidly for someone with a proper bonestructure. He notices the other's form spilling into shadow at the edges, and hastily grabbed Alastor's wrist again to pulse his power aroud the sinner. Wouldn't want him to accidentally discorporate a leg or something and bleed to death on the nice new carpets.

He barely even thinks about it before deciding to just run with the first idea that comes to mind... snapping up a band that definitely didn't look like something a kid at summer camp would make as a friendship bracelet for another, and imbuing it with with a charm to hold the other physically present. If the bellhop hated it, they could fight when he was sober.

Cherri has deposited a snoring Mimzy facedown on a nearby armchair, and Niffty was studiously poking her with a featherduster and giggling at the mumbled swearing.

"Well, they're riproaring drunk, but we gottem back here. What's the plan now?" the spunky powerhouse asks.

"Er... well... they're not destroying the city so we just make them comfortable and change the bucket if anyone pukes?" Lucifer shrugged. How did sinners deal with alcohol? He couldn't get drunk and it never really did anything more than make him tingly for a few hours, and Lillith never felt the need to try to push her limits that far.

From what he understood from seeing several Goetia post-ball, it could feel like a rather persistent headache and sometimes you felt like throwing up. Or you did. He really should have checked in on that... what if Charlie was susceptible? He should have had that talk.

The other Talk was taken by Ozzie, thankfully, because the Sin was bombproof when it came to questions of that nature, and Belphagor covered biology in every possible way. Actually, he should ask Beezelbub, she would have an idea what this would look like...

The King whips out his phone and shoots off a text. Then panics internally about it it was weird that this was his first text in half a year to her. She blew up his messages seconds later, and suggested he just let them stay drunk... alongside several helpful suggestions about greasy food and hydration and some pills she would go bother Belphy to portal over. He sent back it was for several sinners, not him, and she replied that of course it was and she'd tell Belph to drop the dosage.

She then asked who it was for, and he decided to just tell her the whole shituation from the moment Charlie called to the very moment he was watching Angel Dust and Charlie deposit the gangly overlord atop a loveseat with minimal resistance.

She sent back a nnumber of emojis he couldn't identify, and a 'lol love to meet them, sound like a riot!'

A pause. 'Wait did you say he dropped a piano on you?'

'Yeah, he's an ass like that. But I think I won the dad-off. Still, I've got sooooo much blackmail material, the guy has a big fluffy deer tail and he makes these super cute bleats when he's drunk or startled... totally the opposite of the big bad scary overlord he's trying to project. Finally have something on him, to rival his jibes at my duck-making.'

That dinged something in his brain, and he swirled a finger, sending off a very belated gift to Bee and her new boyfriend (Hex? Tex Mex? Checks?).

'OMFG U DID NOT MAKE A DUCK FOR ME AND TEX!!!!!' she shoots back, and he panic declines her incoming call. Texting was a lot for the king at this time. 'THANK U!!! LUV U LUCI BABES!!!'

'Anytime.'

There's a swirl of magic, purple and smelling faintly of candlewax, as a paper bag appeared with a list of instructions on the side. That'd be the pills from Belphagor.

"Good news, we have something to make sure they live through their hangingover or whatever you sinners get, so that's taken care of." He announces, noting Niffty has already procured additional buckets for the other two. "Do we need to... do anything else for them?"

"I mean, normally I'd want to put them in their own rooms and make sure they weren't so... on display... but I also kind of feel like we need them to be in line of sight so we can help if they need it." Charlie says, looking sheepish. Husk is almost as secreticce as Alastor, she doesn't like intruding on their privacy but... well, necessary evils and all that.

"It's easier to make sure no one chokes on their own vomit or ends up stumbling out to start a fight with another overlord if we have eyes on." Vaggie says, practical to the core of her being. "Besides, two of them are staff and we need to make sure they don't die for... I don't know, team work reasons or something?"

"Just admit ya love us Vagatha!" Angel croons, ducking the bar coaster she hurled his way at the exaggerated kiss blown towards the exorcist.

"Ugh, come on man, it's bad enough we can't make the radio deer stop calling me that and now YOU?!" she groans, covering her face in her hands.

"I can go back to pronouncing your name how the First Guy did, if you want Va-..."

"It would be the last thing you do." She snaps back, shoulders unclenching. He may taunt, but since learning that little tidbit, Angel hadn't actually used the name. "Still, this is going to be a setback for the hotel... I mean, we got good enough press after the battle, but this? This is going to piss off a lot of people."

"Nah, Overlords get a weird sort of pass, you know? They do strange crap all the time, and get away with it, because who's gonna stop em?" Angel waves her worries off. "Like, Val does... what Val does all over Pride and do you see anyone up in arms about it? Velvette punched models off the runway the other week and no one said shit. And when that big gal, Zeezi I think? Flattened a district during an argument with the skull guy, not an actual fight apparently just a disagreement with a lotta property damage, no one did fuck all."

"Okay... but they were in their own territories, this was... all over. And he's one of the front-runners for the hotel... it was bad enough when his weird trouble magnet friend came around the first time. But we could call that a one-off. This was... blatant." She counters.

Husk grumbles, pulling his face off the bar. "M...zy has a pass... Al'n'Rsie like her." He managed.

"And that would be enough of an excuse to protect us from fallout?"

"Vox's gunna always be... problem... b'sessed... but... Mim getsa pass. Cause they was 'live t'gether..."

"Ooookay, so, we'll just deal with this when everyone is sober and I can talk about better choices in the future. After all, we're all about second chances here!" Charlie said, smile strained and tone bordering on upset. The hotel hadn't boomed since the battle, but... a few of the more interested applicants had dribbled away in the last few days. It had been disheartening.

"We could get a marching band here in less than 45 minutes, if you need to make a point, duckling?" Lucifer suggests, his grin rather demonic. He backtracks at the mild disappointment on her face. "Kidding! Daddy's kidding! I just meant that sometimes consequences are important... they help you learn lessons that are sometimes painful, but necessary. Like say, not getting wasted and ruining reputations across the entire Pride ring while a tv televises it."

"Ooooh shiiiiit, I forgot about the drones... ugh, how bad is it?" She aims that at Angel, Cherri and Vaggie who are scrolling their phones and wincing. "That's not encouraging."

"Well, I mean he ain't managed to get a shot of the strawberry pimp, not a good one, he's more blur than body in most of 'em... but it's clear he's involved. Husk and the short broad are pretty distinct." Angel replies.

"Hah, how the bloody hell did they get the car on top of the Embassy? Fuckin' legends!" Cherri whoops, showing a truly perplexing picture, which was circling Sinstagram and Veddit for varying reasons.

"Yeah, so we got attention... just not the kind we were after." Vaggie ends, succinctly. "That's a whole problem unto itself. But we'll have to deal with it, cause it's done already. Selfish fucker..."

"Yhooo'd be... more lenient... if'n the one..." Husk paused, almost asleep and staring at a point on the ceiling with intense concentration. He purrs when Angel reaches over to pet his head, an apparently unconscious action, despite the soft gasp the spider lets out. Angel appears to be having a religious experience of his own.

"Can you tell us what you mean, Whiskers?" Angels whispers.

"...las' time... said no... t'Mim she got... got. Couldn' hide from... conse-... cons-... what she did. Died. Bad." Husk explained, leaning into Angel's hand, and starting to drift off in his warm cocoon of inebriation. "S'why he puts... up wi'her shit... more'n mine... not s'muchas Niff... s'the favourite."

"Okay, that was some interesting backstory, but still... this can't keep happening. The last place got physically damaged by her nonsense, and now it's the reputation on the line. At some point, the debt gets repaid, and enough is enough." Lucifer intones, he's aware that today's events could easily lead sinners chasing the little Millie sinner to come here and put Charlie or her dream in danger again.

Of course, he's also the worst at putting up boundaries, so that's a bit hypocritical. The Sins had all been on his shitlist over the millenia, but wormed their way off it... except Mammon, that guy had better never ever EVER suggest a robo version of Charlie again, or Lucifer was going to turn the guy into a public portapotty at the next multiday musical festival on earth.

And yeah, he'd shut them out for a while there too, but those were barriers not boundaries.

Briefly, everyone muses on how they'd handle the requests from a friend they'd known in life... a friend who brought trouble to them, constantly, and the one time they asserted a boundary... that friend paid the ultimate price for their actions. Yeah, that'd be complicated to unravel and it wouldn't be hard to imagine they'd probably go out of their individual ways to help above and beyond.

Ooof, that's some guilt to consider.

"I'm sure we can find a comfortable compromise with Mimzy, through some talk therapy..." Charlie suggests, the optimism fading out halfway. "Yeah, no, I don't know how we could stop her from being... herself. Husk mentioned this was her pattern, when she was here last... and even when Alastor asserted a boundary to make her leave, she still managed to erode it today. Or yesterday, because I think they'd been drinking for a while now..."

"We don't have to fix it, though. What if you just... make it a rule she can't come here, and that if she's having trouble she has to submit a help request in writing to the hotel for you AND Alastor to review?" Vaggie suggests. "That way you can both make a decision on how to respond in the best interests of the hotel?"

Charlie grabs her girlfriend and kisses her, then peppers her beautiful face with kisses. "Ooooh, I love you and your amazing brain!"

Niffty, giggling, appears with a pair of blankets that seem to be stitched together from scraps of everyone's clothing, which she places over the slumbering Husk and Alastor respectively. They didn't really react, but the couches were plush and the sinners seemed to have been awake for longer than would normally be safe, so perhaps that was fine.

Niffty seemed disinclined to provide anything for Mimzy.

"Niff, can you grab one a the blankets for our uest?" Angel prompts, gesturing at the flapper.

Her eye narrows, anger gleaming in the pupil the likes of which not even angels had managed to ignite. "No, she's a Nasty Bad Girl and I don't like how she is always wanting things from Sir. She is a bug he won't let me exterminate."

"Okay, of course, valid!" Angel says, raising his hands up in surrender. "We let the uh, the pesty bitch go cold, yeah?"

"YES!"

Lucifer watches Niffty disappear into the wall through a vent he didn't recall adding. "Have you... gotten that angelic dagger off of her, yet?"

Charlie went wide eyed and so pale you could just about see through her. "Uh oh..."

A maniacal giggle echoed through the wall, and fell into silence too swiftly for anyone to feel safe.

Lucifer's magic pulsed, a miniscule flex really, like being aware that there were muscles involved you weren't consciously moving when you smiled or frowned or yawned. The bracelet was holding the Overlord's physical form together as intended, but it was concerning that it seemed to be happening in the man's sleep. Was this normal for him?

Actually, maybe it was. Sinners were odd like that. Came in all forms and defied every law of physics you can imagine.

Either way, he's glad he thought ahead to binding the idiot into his body; having to restore someone from incoporeal atoms spread about an undefined area like, say, a shadowy void, would be a tedious task. He'd done something similar maybe twice in his long life, and it took ages... he's not willing to lose a decade of Charlie's life to that boring little project. Even if she likes the deer.

Actually, what the fuck is that?

Like a radar pinging an object in sonar range, something is bouncing back and tickling at his brain. That's an unpleasant sensation. Like a itch you can't quite scratch without removing parts of your flesh... which always stressed out beings used to being tied perpetually in these coporeal prisons. Er, bodies.

He moves to the couch with the deer on it and waves aside the blanket. The King startles as he finds Angel's hand grabbing his wrist rather pointedly as Lucifer starts undoing buttons.

"Hold up, Short King... we need to talk consent? Cause I sure as fuck don't mind lecturing an angel on the topic." As the poster child for being manhandled against his will, Angel would naturally be the one to step in, even in this instance. Hells, he'd put himself on the line to keep Charlie safe when she fucked up at his work.

That pulls Lucifer up short. Ah, well, from the outside this would look... not great...

"Whoa, okay, I can explain. Just got caught up in the mystery... er, my bad." He cringes at the tangled explanation. His words don't get easier from there, and Angel doesn't let go of him. "I-I mean, uh, the tether I put on him, it's kind of holding him in his body right now? Cause if he falls into shadows when he's not paying attention bits might get... lost... forever. Or your pet overlord mifght not be able to reform... had a weirdly similar experience when I got depressed enough I dropped the physical body for a bit and then got too distracted and had to pull bits of me back from distant Rings... but I didn't slip into an alternate pocket dimension like the deer can. So he could take ages to put right and-..."

"Dad, breathe!" Charlie interjects, looking flustered. Angel switches his grip to allow him to shake the king slightly.

"I'm breathing, it's fine! I just wanted to make sure he kept all his arms and legs and fleshy bits in the same part of existence. And just a second ago he started to turn to shadows, so the bracelet used a bit of my magic to contain him... but it pinged."

"Pinged what?" Vaggie frowned, suspicious.

"Not sure... felt... too similar to be a conincidence, and I just went to find out what it was without thinking about it. Felt... corrupted."

"Okay, look it sounds logical but ya gotta remember you can't just go about takin' clothes off people, specially when they're not able to stop you!" Angel admonishes, and the King of Hell shrinks back a little. "Look, is it worrying enough you can't wait 'til he's awake or d'you think that it can be left alone until tomorrow? He's uh, he's pretty specific about touch. Not sure why Smiles didn't fucking incinerate me for that hug earlier, even if he and the others were obliterated."

"Er, well... one sec..." Lucifer pulses the magic once more and frowns at the resistence. "Okay, so I think we Need to See it, unfortunately. He can't actually hurt me, you know... yeah he's powerful but... it'd take all the Sins teaming up with the right weapons to take me on with a chance of winning."

Wait, they weren't worried about Alastor hurting Lucifer. That was a given. He hastily added, "And I won't touch him more than necessary. Promise."

Did Alastor know he was defended like this? That these odd sinners liked the fucker enough to admonish the king of hell for him?

Angel slowly released his grip. They both knew Lucifer could have freed himself, but... it was the principle.

Using his powers instead, Lucifer gently opened the coat and undershirt, pushing aside the odd black straps that seemed to provide compression as well as hold the outfit in place.

He winces. "Ah, fuck, that's... well, it's healing, but I think what caught the attention of my powers was the residual angelic grace. It was muffled by whatever enchantment's on his coat, or I'd have noticed it sooner, given how close we've been for the last few weeks, and the whole... landing on me earlier thing."

"Do we-... how do we fix it?" Charlie asks, looking determined. "We have a first aid kit, and I know Rosie from Cannibal Town is apparently super good with magical afflictions and they're friends so she might help for a Favour..."

He cracks his fingers. "No, I got this... it's not hard to remove normally, but this has festered for a bit. Gonna assume an angel got him with one of their spears at some point... surprised it hasn't healed though. Enough power and you can live with a bit of angelic grace under the skin until it dissipates..."

Vaggie has a thousand yard stare going. "And what if it... came from someone a bit more powerful than an exorcist, Sir?"

"Like who? the only one there with even the vaguest hint of Heavenly endowment was Adam, and most of it was in his stupid guitax or whatever he called it. Must have been forged by one of the other archangels, he definitely didn't have the imagination or power to make it himself." Lucifer laughed, mind whirling through different ideas on who must have helped the first man with his little toy. Maybe Uriel, who was full of compassion but never made sturdy weapons, he just lacked interest. Might be why it broke so easily.

"...and if a sinner took on the first man and was hit by it? How bad would that be?" Vaggie prodded again, looking at the wound. It had been stitched, but all the movement of the last few hours had frayed patches, snapped other areas and generally bruised the already upset skin to either side. Not to mention the length of it was concerning.

Lucifer sucks air through his teeth. "Then this will suck... mostly for me, because it's going to taste awful... from a magical perspective. Not sure if Sinners can get the flavour of other magics, or scent? Or... look, it's a sense that I tried to let humans have but Heaven said No so it's hard to explain. Imagine trying to tell an alien race that didn't develop sight how that works and what it's like?"

"Okay, so... we need anything for this?" Angel asks, practically.

"Just help to unlatch his jaw if he wakes up mad for me touching him?" Lucifer half-jokes, but he really hopes it doesn't come to that. He flexes his fingers before touching the area, and yep, that's adam's borrowed Grace alright... it's like running your tongue through a garbage bin with a faint hint of the First Man's original clean, oceanic 'scent'. Or soul taste?

Ugh, humans and sinners and winners... they really needed to expand their vocabulary so it wasn't so hard to explain fundamentals!

It's not hard to coax out, but boy does it make the King want to throw up something fierce. If Alastor had just said something to start with, it'd be a breeze... literally, it would have tasted of gentle ozone and maybe a bit of gore, or whatever Alastor's soul-taste was, but nothing this bad...

This was why you didn't let angelic injuries fester. not only could they kill you but it was absolutely the Worst to heal them. He pulls back, finally, and reaches for one of the handy dandy buckets which is quickly provided to him by someone helpful who he was going to give a medal to in future.

When he finished throwing up, and had felt able to sip some of the cool fruit juice provided, Lucifer blinked back to the present. Charlie was hovering, and the Bucket had been removed by someone.

Angel had covered Alastor up again, at least with the blanket over the healing injury the Overlord wouldn't feel so exposed. With the angelic grace removed, there should be no issues for the wound to just... close up on its own. Soon, if there was enough energy left not currently stopping the overlord from dying of alcohol poisoning.

Charlie moved Lucifer to a seat and helped him rest.

"Are you okay, Dad? You kind of... threw up for a while there. Can I get you something gentle, like toast or... or crackers?" She offers.

"Yeah, maybe some toast would help." He agrees, feeling exhausted. He hadn't thrown up in centuries, it was a wildly unwelcome return of such an old experience.

"No one in the hotel is allowed to get hurt with angelic weaponry for the next century... I'm going to make it a law." Lucifer groans, finally feeling his own innate healing ability settle his stomach. "Especially if any of you try to hide it like that... it's like chugging the sludge at the bottom of a dumpster. Never again. He is going to owe me so much for this..."

He felt Charlie freeze slightly, trying to decide if this was a jest or not.

Lucifer cracks open an eye. "I mean metaphorically, duckling, I don't do Deals with anyone and I'm not going to tally it up. But if I can get him to like... help sort through that fucking mess that used to be my office in the Palace at some point, that'd be great. Not that he has to, but I;ve seen how he collated your paperwork and now I want to borrow him."

He saw a few shoulders release unconscious tension.

Was everyone really so scared of obligations? Of tit for tat? Or was it because everyone here was owned, or had been owned at some point, excepting Charlie? Vaggie had been in a Heavenly form of servitude to Adam after all.

He shrugs, "Well you can't ask for what's not there either... hah, you can't share a soul unless the contract is excruciatingly specifically worded. Oof, yeah, I've seen those go down... but no, Bambi is safe from indentured servitude from me. Wouldn't kill him to be nicer, though." Lucifer pauses. "Actually, I'm starting to suspect that if he tries to compliment me he might just start bleeding from the eyes out of sheer spite."

"Wait so how're the Vees sharing souls then?" Cherri cuts in, scrolling her phone and half-aware of the conversation from where she's laying on the floor, legs against Husk's couch.

Lucifer had been wondering actually.

"Far as I can figure, they either each have individually held contracts but an overarching three-way deal between them that allows a small percentage of ownership across all deals with the Vees... or they have subclauses in their deals to allow multiple owners."

"Gotta be the first one, I recall my contract and it wasn't well written or full of subclauses... I've seen the ones Vox makes up. Surprised that any of his employees can pee without needing to ask permission, his are thorough to the point of no loopholes, whereas Val's are more to the point. He puts down what ya gonna do for him and when, where, how, what the kickback is and then you sign it. Not sure about Velvette, never seen one'a her contracts." Angel shrugs.

"Interesting. Well, like I said, you can't jointly own a soul without everyone agreeing to it... although, it has to be said that it doesn't matter if it was signed willing or under duress. Seen that happen too. Some of the older overlords used that tactic a lot, it was infuriating but the Laws prevent me getting involved between sinner to sinner deals." Lucifer says, then adds. "Of course, you catch a sinner and goetia making a deal, it comes before me for review. Or, you know, Lillith... because of the inherent power imbalance. And with a Sin? Royalty has to be a third party for that one, it's mandatory."

"That's... a lot to handle. You never told me about all the paperwork you and mum had to do, Dad. Is there some way I can help you?"

Not for the first time, did Lucifer wonder how he'd made something so wonderfully caring and earnest as Charlie.

"No, it's fine... happens so rarely these days that it's only a blip in the ocean of things we need to pay attention to. You have your hotel as well, and I'd hate to distract you... plus, I can always ask Alberta here if he'll give me a hand. Just subtly mention the whole healing business... you know Overlords, they hate to be in debt."

"Mmm, maybe try asking as a friend first so it's not weighted against him?" Charlie coaxes. And he holds back an eyeroll, she really is something so optimistic it almost hurts sometimes.

"Sure, Char-Char. I'll ask the deer if he's willing to help." Lucifer can't help but stare at the Overlord a minute longer, his own words echoing in his head. Lilli always took care of the big deals... so why, then, had her own deal with this sinner before him not triggered magic to drop it on his desk? There were safeguards to avoid this very situation.

Royalty couldn't make soul deals with Sinners, well... they could, they just shouldn't. It was just slavery with extra steps at that point. Sure, sinners could own other sinners, and there were FUCKED terms for some contracts but... most had a way out. Your deal holder could die or be overthrown, you could have the contract terminated or finish when the task / time limit ceased, there were dozens of ways to end one. But not if the person holding your leash was an immortal all powerful being.

Goetia rarely died except by political assassinations. The Sins weren't going anywhere. And the Royal Family? Forget about it.

That was why it was never fully balanced.

Now he desperately wanted to know what it was that Lillith had offered, what she had provided. Was it power? Was it protection? Was the deal offered honestly out of care, or... sought under duress? Before she left there had been a lot of rage in his Queen, some of it aimed at him for his failings and poor mental presence... and a lot of it directed at Heaven for their stipulations around Charlie.

He could withstand that anger, he was almost invulnerable. But a Sin? A Goetia? Maybe. A Sinner? They were breakable... but then, that was the best thing about Sinners, they could regenerate as many times as you wanted with only the mental trauma to contend with. Bodies healed as minds broke.

"Dad? You went quiet and kept staring at Al... is everything okay? Like, did you get all the poison out?"

"What? Oh, yeah... just... wondering what your mother could have offered... that's all. She didn't like doing Deals all that much but..."

"...what?" the smallness of the query made him snap back to reality and his eyes locked on Charlotte's face. She seemed to be coming around to a conclusion, and for he first time Lucifer recognised that perhaps this was also something being concealed by the red fucker, like his injury.

It was just... the others at the hotel were so open about their status, wasn't the bellhop?

"Uh... well, first things first I'm going to need you to find all the angelic steel around the place and hide it at the Palace. It can't kill me, but it does hurt and I don't want him getting his hands on it when they all wake up tomorrow." He says, trying to distract and diffuse. "Then, we're all going to pretend I said nothing because I don't think he wanted to share that and I'm still talking, why am I talking? I need to stop doing that..."

He yelps as Angel picks him up and brings him over to the couch Husk is sleeping on, putting the King close enough to both feel and hear the rumbling purr. Oh... oh that was nice. Soothing.

"And now we're gonna breathe in for four... and then out for four, yeah? Good, c'mon now, Short King." Angel coaxed, clearly experienced in managing these situations. That was disheartening.

When he finally had control of himself again, Lucifer buried his face in his hands. "I'm getting tired of being tired and stressed out. That hasn't happened in a long time, either... it was getting better."

"Look, it's true you fucked up a bit and shared something that y'weren't aware was a secret. But we've all done that before, like the time I mentioned to P-... to a friend who ain't around anymore that Cherri would love to take both'a his cute little cocks for a spin, if he'd just ask her to her face for a date. She made me eat one of her bombs, and then bang him myself to give a review..."

That caught Lucifer's attention. "Well...?"

"Huh? Oh, 4.5 stars, he's pretty good at using everything he's got. Just needs a bit more confidence in asking for things, that's all." Angel grins, winking at Vaggie who looked furious that Angel had been banging other guests. "Oh unclench babes, it was outside the hotel."

"...as riveting as this conversation is, could we perhaps hold it elsewhere?" Interjects a decidely startling voice, as the Overlord sits up to glare at them all. Ah, well, fuck... seems the drainage process has siphoned off some other things too. There's a nearly sober, angry overlord glaring at the King.

"Whoa, Smiles you might wanna stay horizontal, you guys went at it hard and I dunno if it's all through your systems yet." Angel cautions, moving to hover. "Just saying, you either feel a bit shitty right now or you're about to."

"I assure you I am perfectly fine, and will remain so for as long as it takes to retire to my own rooms." Alastor replies, there's no heat in the tone. Merely acceptance of the situation. His eyes automatically identify that Mimzy and Husker are alive and cared for, before returning to the miniature monrach. "And now, you are going to explain yourself and why you never learned to keep a secret in your many millenia of existence."

"Ex-cuuuuuse ME?!" Lucifer shoots back. "I didn't know it was a hush hush secret topic, asshole! And I'm sorry, but don't get your damn tail in a twist over it!"

A record scratch filled the air, as red fluffy ears fought not to pin back. Ah, perhaps the tail was also meant to be a little secret?

Shit. Good Job Lucifer.

"Look it ain't a big deal, or it won't be because it's just us here, Smiles... we've all been trapped at some point or other. Heck, you've got Husk and Niffty right now on ya own leash... they're okay enough about it. You think I'd judge you? Me? I'm stuck with someone who treats me like a pre-warmed fleshlite most'a the time, I'm not casting stones in this glass hotel." Angel says, trying to validate the other.

"I... appreciate your candor here, Angel. When there is time, I'm certain I will find space in my schedule to manage the outrageous nonsense those Vees are up to." A well-worded promise without an actual promise. Alastor wanted the trio gone, and if that meant Angel was freed... so be it. "However, you are at liberty to talk about your contract... without reprisal. The fact that not only is someone aware but it happens to involve both royals, breaches two separate clauses. It will be unlikely to go under the radar."

"You know where she is?" Charlie asked, confused, furious and lost in in one big ball.

"Yes. She went... up."

"U-...? OH. Why would she...?"

"I could not say why she made that choice. Just that it was. You were never intended to know this."

"Are you here because of the Deal?" Lucifer asked.

"...perhaps."

"To help or hinder?"

"Both."

"To keep Charlie safe?"

"Yes."

"To keep the hotel safe?"

"Not quite."

"To... sabotage the hotel?"

"...also, not quite."

"To stop anyone from being redeemed?"

Instead of an answer there was a dinging, like someone getting a jackpot on a slot machine.

"How?"

"Unclear, nothing concrete was advised. I merely have to... be here."

"Okay... anything else?"

"Nothing I can discuss."

"What do you get out of it? Seems like a lot of work."

"...nothing. A service was already rendered."

That caught Lucifer off-guard. "What?"

"I can't tell you."

"Okay, okay, uh... did you get power?"

A whump-whump noise played.

"Protection?"

A sad slide whistle.

"Money? Fame?"

An audience booing.

"Hey you try playing 400 questions with no help from the other team, jerk! I'm thinking..."

"Don't strain yourself too hard, we need you alive."

"Oh you fucker..." Lucifer burst into laughter. "Alright, so she did something for you... and now you are stuck o babysitting duty?"

"I-... suppose you could put it that way."

"Did she kill someone for you?"

"No."

"Did you sleep with one another?"

There was a tyre screech sound as Alastor wrinkled his nose at the repugnance of such a question. "Wherever do you get such vile thoughts from, Majesty? No, we have never even been close to intimate."

Okay, ouch. That was His Wife there pal. Maybe ease up on the judgement, huh? Lucifer thought she was fucking gorgeous.

"Did she provide you or someone important to you with something material?"

"No."

"What about... I don't know, it's hard to think of this stuff on the fly. What about..." Lucifer glances at Alastor's chest. "Healing? Did she heal you for some reason?"

"...in a manner of speaking?"

"Oh? Okay, did she heal you after a fight with another Overlord?"

"Technically yes, but it was not the main reason."

"An angelic wound?"

"Also technically yes."

"Did she help with a poison, pysical or magical?"

"You might call it that, but it was also only tangentially involved."

"You are NOT making this easy. So, you fought an Overlord and that did something but wasn't the main reason you needed her help. You were also injured with angelic steel but that wasn't the main reason either. And somehow there was a poison or poisoning essence involved?"

"All true, to some degree."

Lucifer could feel his stomach churning, like his mind had made a conclusion that he didn't want to imagine.

"Was... was Lillith the cause of any of the potential injuries that required healing?"

There was a weighted silence. "Yes."

"Did you start a fight with her?"

"No."

"Did you have a pre-existing relationship?"

"Also no. I had never seen her in person prior to her seeking me out."

"Can you tell me who you were fighting before she arrived?"

"Of course."

Lucifer waited, then rolled his eyes. "Finish the sentence, jackass."

Alastor seemed smug. "Be more specific in your asking. Yes, I can tell you I had been fighting with Vox, but he had decided to include both his new compatriots without any warning that they were there. Three on one can be managed if you know the odds in advance and strategise. An ambush, however, puts you on the backfoot from the beginning of the encounter."

"Was there angelic steel involved in this fight?"

"No."

"The poison?"

"In a manner of speaking, yes. I consider it poison, but the wielder does not."

Angel is frowning, "Wait... are you talking about Val's weird spit stuff?"

"The very same. He's quite clever at applying it in person and also to bladed weaponry, when the mood strikes."

Angel cringes. "Yeah, I can see why you consider that poison... specially when it takes your control away. Fuckin' nasty stuff if ya not prepared for it."

"Why, what does it...?" Lucifer asks, and his eyes widen in disgust as Angel bends to whisper in his ear. Cherri looks ready to kill. "I didn't realise anyone could do that up here or I would have ended him some time ago."

"It's on my To Do list as well." Alastor hums.

"Okay, alright, so facts on the table... fightingg someone, one becomes three and one of them has a venom type ability that can do all sorts of whacky shit... somehow you either get free or Lilli turned up to help?"

"My shadow made the decision that we would leave the encounter. They can act according to their own will as needed. Very useful."

"Okay, so you went somewhere... and my wife found you?"

"Yes."

"Where?"

"My radio tower. The old one I had affixed to the hotel before the battle. There are wards all through it that prevent Vox from following."

"And Lilli just... turned up?"

"Yes. I don't know how she knew or why."

"The angelic injury, did it happen before you left the battle or... after?"

"After. Deliberately."

Lucifer swallowed. He'd guessed, but... now it was confirmed he felt sick again. "And the healing happened after that?"

"Technically yes."

"Was it offered freely?"

"Technically yes. I was free to take up the opportunity or she could-..." Alastor's voice clicked off. Clearly a forbidden topic. "There was no other option."

"She forced you into a Deal then?"

"Hmmm... perhaps."

"And the like 7 ish years you were gone?"

"Making a point abotu disobedience."

"You, being difficult to work with? How unusual!" Lucifer enacted a shocked gasp.

"Are you satisfied with the information provided or would you like something else deeply personal presented in a group setting before I retire, your Shortness? I can always strip for you, since you seem to want to know All..."

"YES!" Angel and Cherri called excitedly, clashing with the rapid-fire "NO!" from Charlie and Vaggie.

Lucifer relents. "No, no that's fine I just... was trying to find a loophole. So you don't get anything from all of this?"

"Correct."

"Any stipulations we can know about? See if we can make it easier for you to weather this?"

Alastor tests a few thoughts and nothing seems to stop him so he proceeds. "I was not supposed to raise arms against HEaven... she was insistent on that. And I did not."

"You... faced the First Man UNARMED are you INSANE?!" Lucifer just about shrieked. "Okay, forget it, I've decided you're too mad to stay around my daughter."

"Hardly, I'm at least 40% sane."

"Beg to differ. Okay, what else?"

"Redemption must not be possible, if it is it must be stopped. Charlotte is not to be harmed where possible, unless it is in conflict with the previous requirement."

"She wanted you to potentially hurt Charlie?"

"As a last resort... but yes. The hotel's defence is mine, but seeking conflict outside of this is not permitted unless in self-defence."

"And...? I feel like there's something you missed out on."

"And... where possible, Lucifer Morningstar is to be kept away from Charlotte, even if it means breaking him psychologically to the point where he is no longer fit to rule. She was insistent on that latter point and suggested where best to press to make you flinch."

"Oh, that explains the Dad-Off..."

"Somewhat. You were also an arrogant bastard who thought himself better than everyone here and needed to be taken down a peg or three."

"I was NOT-..."

"Afraid so, good chap. However, now you're here, I can't technically do anything about it."

"Alright, can she summon you from the hotel?"

"Yes."

"Bugger, I'll put up more wards."

"No. If she realises you know she may enact whatever plan it is that keeps her in Heaven. She has something going on she refuses to speak about."

"Okay. Well my little bracelet there should bounce back any summoning attempts, and I command you to wear it."

"...okay. And what will you do now you know of this matter?"

"...same as I intende to do for everyone here, Bambi... break it, legally."

"You would go against Lillith for such a thing?"

"Yes. This... is against what we agreed on, no soul deals for the royal family and here I find out she's trapping Overlords in deals through force and violence. You may not be the only one. Just the one I know of."

"That is a concerning thought."

"Isn't it just?"

-------

More ideas but its 330am

>Angel asks how he can lose a soul but retain his chains. Lillith was specific in her Deal.

>Mimzy wakes up hungover and angry.

?Cherri was using her phone without the hotel warding on it, so Vox heard everything

>Big confrontation with everyone.

>Lillith has a Plan.

Etc.

[spicyspiders]

Yeah, I guess I prefer like when a post is centered more around lore that the comments aren't just full of thirsty people if that makes sense??? Idk I'm very picky with things and ik that's probably not the best💀

Anyways I'm working on a fantasy ish au for Scott and Logan, the other X-Men are there too but main focus is the silly gays :3 Scott is an elf and Logan is a werewolf but like a wolverine version???

Mutation still exists technically but it's more seen as curses/witchcraft because it's more older times yk. Scott has to wear a blindfold as he has yet to discover that ruby-quartz helps contain his optic blasts. He lied and said his eyes were damaged in a hunt, people don't know he's 'cursed' but they're suspicious 🙁 think he's a weirdo

Logan is a werewolf, which people already see as evil or signs of witchcraft🙄 his regeneration is the mutation, as well as the claws when he's in his humanoid form, he's kinda become a myth/legend. Lotta hunters wanna slay the un killable beast, Scott was curious about it but didn't wanna kill Logan - he knows werewolves are literally just trying to exist most of the time.

Scott and Logan meet when Scott is out hunting deer for food, despite losing his eyesight, he's still a great hunter and being an elf helps with his crazy good hearing. Scott kills a deer, goes to get it and Logan is mid stealing it because hey less work for him.

Scott is originally very cranky about Logan, annoyed with him constantly🙄 tbf I'd be pissed off too if I kill a big fat deer and some big cranky wolverine stole it😭

Eventually Scott does gets some fancy ruby eye coverings so he can actually see again but we haven't figured it out fully yet

In human form, Logan does have wolverine ears but people think it's just his hair (he still styles it in the kitty ear shape, hides his ears really good.) big ol fangs😈 h'es a stinky man, needs a bath🙄 (wolverines actually stink a lot, use their stench to mark their territory and as a big 'fuck off' to other wolverines)

Sorry for the long message D:

-😼

That sounds interesting. I have some questions about it, but if you don't want to read them, I'll put it under a read more.

Does Scott just walk around with his eyes closed before he finds the ruby eye coverings? Does Logan immediately steal the deer after Scott kills it? With Scott having crazy good hearing like you said, wouldn't he have been able to hear that Logan was near and knew the risk of him stealing it? Wouldn't Logan also know that Scott is near with his enhanced senses? Or is Logan just an asshole and steals it anyway?

[ask-a-bot]

Hello, 🪣 again.

Sorry for the radio silence, Frank, Beans, Merlin, Thor, Pidge and Toast have arrived in Scotland, you should see them any time now… hopefully. Merlin got badly injured in the war and his chronometer and navigation systems haven’t worked right since, so they might’ve gotten lost. Let me know if you spot them? (Good news: they haven’t been arrested so far!)

——

Things… aren’t going well over here I’m afraid. Wukong took a turn for the worse and started vomiting this morning, hence the lack of responses from Kitty. He’s cheerful enough, despite the whole Severe Poisoning situation, but the Vehicons have flown into a panic.

To make matters worse, Monsoon seems to share Megatron’s emetophobia. I’m currently dealing with a very distressed and dry heaving seeker, while covered in vomit myself (really hoping none of the substances in it are harmful to organics). I’m doing my best to look after him, but I’m only human. Whatever y’all pay your medics is not enough.

Kitty mentioned you offered medgrade? Downpour is currently flying her way to Scotland, if it wouldn’t be too much trouble, could you send it back with her?? We could really use it right now.

Wish me luck, 🪣

You should have told Monsoon to go along as well. And you need to shower – take no chances. I have the medgrade ready.

When one of us is in a bad way, Dot brings out a big, industrial-sized garbage can. You know, the kind that tenements, schools and such have. No idea where she got it...

I think Alex brought it home from work.

With nobody seeing him? Impressive!

He probably just bought the thing online.

Probably. Anyway, you need something like that. You also need somewhere to contain and dispose of Cybertronian biological wastes – that one included. Our... uh...

Rejected matter?

That'll do. Our rejected matter can poison your planet. You need some way to... well... to avoid the planet getting polluted.

They pollute it anyway!

So? As guests on this planet, we have a responsibility not to add to the problem. We need to dispose of our waste with care and respect.

Seekers like to jettison on the wing.

Ugh! Yuck.

That is a cultural thing, Bumblebee. They are like birds.

Birds go wherever! I had one land on my helm and drop white stuff in my optic.

Yeah... I hope you don't "drop" on the wing too.

Shut up.

This bickering is getting us nowhere. Starscream, in case you have forgotten, you are forbidden from jettisoning on the wing. You are to use the washrack like everyone else and the same goes for your trine.

I haven't forgotten, but we aren't the only seekers here, are we? Do you think they're-

We cannot help what the others do. That is not our responsibility.

That's not fair!

Do you think poisoning a planet is fair?

... No.

No, Optimus and Megatron's right – you've gotta leave a place you visit as you found it or better.

I know that. You've been telling me that since my first planet.

Yeah, well, it's important.

It is. OK... I hope what we've said is helpful. Let us know if you need any more help or advice and we'll see what we can do.

[x-mencomics]

The Uncanny X-Men #177 - Sanction

In an empty amusement park, Mystique fights against the X-Men. She slices Wolverine's throat with a knife and he dies. She stabs Kitty and she dies. In the amusement park's house of mirrors, she uses the mirrors to amplify Cyclops's optic blasts and aim them at Colossus, killing him. Then she strangles Cyclops to death. She changes her costume to one that can absorb Storm's lightning and when Storm predictably strikes Mystique, Mystique absorbs it and redirects it to a nearby fuel truck which explodes, killing Storm. She shoots Rogue with a very powerful gun. Then Nightcrawler shows up. Mystique tries to kill him with that knife, but he teleports away, then punches her, knocking her out cold.

Mystique wakes up. Seems like it was all a dream. Arcade and Miss Locke burst into the room and congratulate Mystique on a job well done against his X-Men robots in Murderworld (see issue #146). Mystique had previously asked Arcade to set up Murderworld as a training ground for her and her Brotherhood to practice fighting against the X-Men. Mystique wants to fight and kill the REAL X-Men and get Rogue back from them.

Meanwhile, at Stevie Hunter's dance studio, Kitty asks Stevie about Storm's new look and attitude. She says Storm has become a total stranger to her. Storm walks in and overhears Kitty, asking if Kitty thinks she's some kind of monster now. Kitty says that compared to what Storm was, maybe so. Kitty walks out of the room. Storm confides in Stevie that she thinks Kitty may be right about her...

In space, on board the Starjammer, Lilandra says goodbye to Charles. He tells her to come back for him some day, and she says she will. In another room on the ship, Alex and Scott say goodbye to their father, Christopher. Charles, Alex, and Scott are beamed back to earth, and Christopher and Lilandra begin their long journey back to the Shi'ar Empire.

Kurt and Amanda, and Kitty and Peter go on a double date to the ballet. While Peter and Kitty go park the car, Kurt and Amanda walk inside. Kurt talks to Amanda about how he wishes he could meet his father like Scott and Alex have. He also recalls meeting Mystique and asking her about a possible connection between himself and her because of how similar they look (see issue #142). Mystique responded that he should ask his mother. Margali Szardos is Amanda's real mother and the woman who raised Kurt. Amanda says all she knows about Kurt's past is that Margali found Kurt on the side of the road when he was just a baby. Amanda suggests they call Margali tomorrow to talk more about it.

Suddenly, there's a huge explosion in a nearby building. Peter transforms into Colossus, yells for Kitty to call the Fire Dept, and rushes into the building. He wants to save anyone who's inside. But the building seems completely abandoned. Until the Blob shows up.

The Blob says the explosion was a trap to get the X-Men to come inside the building. The Blob punches Colossus and he goes flying. Then Pyro appears and starts burning Colossus with his fire powers. At first Colossus seems fine, but then the flames get hotter and hotter. Colossus turns red; then white-hot. Pyro makes a giant bird out of flames which carries Colossus out of the building and into a nearby construction zone. The flame-bird disappears, but Avalanche is waiting there in the construction zone. Avalanche uses his powers to make a liquid nitrogen trucks explode, and Colossus is covered with the liquid nitrogen. Kitty rushes to the construction zone and finds Colossus. The liquid nitrogen has turned him to stone!

[enbycrip]

This is my precious baby girl. She’s a rescue pup with one eye - she had to have the other one removed because a benign tumour was pressing on the optic nerve. I was getting more ill and disabled when we adopted her and honestly she really helped me deal with my own issues with internalised disableism.

We think she’s maybe a Staffie-Jack Russell cross? Definitely Staffie anyway. She’s got the lovely Staffie temperament but she’s itsy for a Staffie.

She’s just the most ridiculously sweet pup. She has zero prey drive of any kind - *very* unlike her kitty sibling! She cries if we ever find a dead animal.

She *adores* her kitty bro - she used to be scared of cats after being bullied by this horrible white cat who terrorised our old neighbourhood, but she *loves* him. She’s nervous of bigger dogs but she loves smaller ones - her best dog friend is a tiny blind black pug called Betty.

[the-stephen-mcclanahan]

Toriyama and The Super Villain share One Beer upon the Lathe of Heaven

"Fuck bitches, get money." – Bulma, probably

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm really fucked up about Toriyama-san passing. This is a series of unmeasured mournings I've never had the chance to process. Death is around every corner; beware, here there be Dragon(s) {Ball}.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gadzooks, Punk's Dead

Stella was 19 and waifish; picture a whispy, mud-grey shorthair cat on spindly legs with one glassy eye, her haggard mew calling through night and day like an omen. She would leap from high places her joints had no right to hold up against. I loved that beleaguered creature with all my heart. When my ex introduced me to her the first time I visited her apartment, I felt my soul tether to this witchy feline.

In January 2022, while my then-partner was away with her mother on a beach trip, I watched as the reliably lively kitty crone lay lonely through the day, her cold demeanor echoing the silence I knew in my gut meant something was wrong. She wouldn't join me on the bed that night, and when I awoke I found her prone in the dirty litter box tucked away in the closet. Her breathing was shallow and her cries quiet, and through hot flashes of tears, I swaddled her while I made phone calls to the coast and the vet and anyone who would listen. I didn't know when I handed her over to the VCA that I was loving her for the last time, that she had fought to live long enough that I could escort her to the Gates. I told her I loved her, but in my fear, I never thought to thank her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Take Me to Your Leader

Why is it always fucking Instagram? New Year's Eve 2020 – months of anguished self-interrogation at the thought of stepping outside the house crudely shoved into its ill-fitting psychic compartment like so much crinkled Christmas wrapping paper – and the cosmic saxophone playing us off the stage dampens to a wet fart when XXL reports on my timeline that DOOM departed Primary Reality on Halloween. The soundtrack of my young adulthood scratched, DJ falling face-first onto the Wheels of Steel, no beat in his heart; we've been ratted out, boys, so cheese it, before the Heat comes on.

Daniel Dumile was a different breed; he didn't want the cult or the recognition. He wanted to make dope shit. Go listen to the Red Bull interview again. The Mask wasn't a gimmick, it was him; he polished the cracks and snags of his optics until there was no tactile humanity to cling on to, a mirror shine of accountability on his metal for every pimple-faced geek like me who looked up to him. It was never about Dumile. He was there in the rhymes, in the beats. We obsessed over alter egos and collaborations and SAMPLES – would I have cared about Sade Adu without the Villain? – and he croaked having only ever wanted to make dope shit.

DOOM comes for us all.

I never got to thank him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Wall Around the Place

In 2018, on an errant trip to my folks', I stumbled across a repost of Ursula K. Le Guin's National Book Awards speech with the caption "R.I.P.". My mother graced me with several rare (for us) minutes of silence when I told her I didn't know how to be. When I left my childhood home a half-an-hour later, the air was astringent and the wet-land pasture outside my window buzzed with insect chatter.

The Earthsea books are everything I aspire to in my creative work. Le Guin covered more of the human soul in sentences a fraction of the length these fucking dorks propped up by the ~ C A N O N ~ could've dreamed to pen. She liberally seasoned her work with radical ideologies and served it all wrapped in fairy-tale fantasy and, whelp, I've pretty much chased that feeling since middle school. I still haven't found it.

She was a long-time resident of Portland and spoke regularly at events in the city. At that point in my life, I'd lived an hour away from her. I never got to thank her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Journey to the (Pacific North)West

Silverton High School's library in 2009 was brand new off a bond measure issued 20 years before, and each ripple from those taxpayer dollars over the years brought Dragon Ball Vol. 1 nearer to the front desk display counter where I initially found it. The bright red cover featuring a child Goku recalled hours of my youth yearning for the Z-Fighters in action I was forbidden from by my reactionary parents. I picked up the book with a curiosity steeped in taboo.

God*DAMN, that book annihilated my 14-year-old brain; martial arts battles and panty jokes and nazi-coded bad guys and magic orbs that summoned a dragon to grant your wish and how THA FUK was this in Bum-fuck-Nowhere, Oregon? On a high school library bookshelf?

[ No, seriously, how in THE ACTUAL FUCK was this in my public school library?!?!]

When I exhausted the 3 volumes in the school, I stalked through the town library, scraped together rare side-job dollars for bookstores, and clawed at low-res scans on shady websites. Dragon Ball was the first manga I read cover-to-cover, not to mention my gateway into almost every other thing I would obsess over for the next decade-and-a-half. There is a direct line of influence from my years of martial arts training to finding Dragon Ball to picking up Enter the Wu-Tang: 36 Chambers, ruining me forever. Without Goku's adventures, I wouldn't have fallen in love with Hip–Hop; I never would have gotten fit; no Neon Genesis for me, and everything that comes with it. Hell, DOOM's sonic universe of comic-book shenanigans probably owes some debt to Akira Toriyama for my avid fixation. So many lives have touched mine for ripples from the rock dropped by Dragon Ball into the river of my soul.

Toriyama's passing this month is cold and familiar, an estranged uncle you never felt the pressing urge to know until it was too late. I've played in his sandbox countless times, running the gamut of emotion through every fantasy he painstakingly crafted within those pages. Dragon Ball is not just my childhood but the majority of my life, intimate in the way only boon companions can be. I've never known much about Toriyama Akira outside of his oeuvre, and his death is a wound deeper than any blade or bullet can bring because I am not here without Stelly or Metal Face or Le Guin or Toriyama-sensei.

I never got a chance to thank him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Boldly Go

I was 8 when we scattered Robert's ashes.

We set out for the Oregon coast, our party of faintly realized familial connections from around the States, and found an unremarkable cove for our bitter deed. I was too young to know what ~absence~ – as in a lifetime – could mean; to me, Uncle Bob was returning Home, the waves a sublime chariot into the Beyond. I had known he was sick, but not quite in the way I knew Stella was sick; visits to his Portland apartment – wall-to-wall, top-to-bottom with the gleam of bagged and boarded single-issue comic books – were filled with tense silence as the subject of his terminal condition was daintily avoided by my mother, beside herself with stoic grief.

Robert was the first person I can remember who loved me unconditionally; who doted on me just for existing; who staged elaborate magic tricks that flourished with X-Men comics and Star Trek episodes to misdirect me from his predictable disappearance. HIV is a bitch of a Final Boss and my uncle became yet another barely-closeted gay man with fringe interests to stain the legacy of his conservative bloodline by succumbing to its cruel assault. I loved him and didn't know how to mourn him because I had never mourned a death before, and my models for that ritual didn't either, fearing him as much as they loved him, too.

The countable hours I shared with my uncle before his passing were the first cracks in the foundation of my stasis, the punctuation hanging at the end of every doubt. Without my Uncle, I never join GSA in high school, and never find all of the Queer people I keep close to my heart; without my mother's love beyond fear for her brother, I never learn to love art as I love life; without Robert, I never find Dragon Ball.

As we sent his ashes drifting into the Pacific Ocean, I whispered to the wind that I loved him.

I never thought to thank him until now.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I've shed too many tears over this stupid exercise in ~ R E L E A S E ~ to mention the countless others, so let's wrap this up:

Epilogue

My oathsworn brother – the one who's Instagram message broke the news of Toriyama-san's passing – called me an hour or so later after I told him I was crying. I confided in him my great shame of never sharing with Sensei how grateful I was for his effort in the struggle against human loneliness.

"He knows," I heard through the phone, without hesitation. "He's up on some lotus flower contemplating it all. He knows."

The Dead don't need our thanks: their peace is transcendent. We give our thanks to them for ourselves, to assuage the monotonous pain of knowing that many of us perish without Justice and only some pass Beyond having taken on more than their share of the burden to any lasting effect. The Congo is burning, Gaza is rubble, and I can't stop thinking about what went through Toriyama's mind when he drew Vegeta hugging his son for the first time before the redeemed villain’s predictable disappearance.

Don't just tell your people you love them. Thank them.

[sol-hearth]

Omg das a lotta questions. Cracks knuckles 1. Were you named after anybody?

No, my parents picked a universal international name, and tbh thank god they did, cuz I cannot imagine going into uni in Edinburgh and going like "Yes hi, my name is Божидар" or some shit.

2. When was the last time you cried?

Mh. Dunno, time's hard to keep track of.

3. Do you have kids?

Kids? In this economy? Get real.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

I dunno, you tell me.

5. What sports do you play/have played?

Pfft, I've played Football, Basketball and Handball for like ~ a year or 2 each, enough to have been in the school's team in each. Additionally I did AiKiDo for like a good 7 years. Currently nothing tho.

6. What's the first thing you notice about someone?

I dunno? Their vibes? Not very concrete but it makes sense to me.

7. Eye color?

Like blue mostly. Maybe a tint of green.

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

Uhh. I'm bad with horror so happy endings?

9. Any special talents?

Not really? I'm kinda alright at math I guess.

10. Where were you born?

Bulgaria, Sofia.

11. What are your hobbies?

Video games, music, anime, card games, I'm making a VN game with a friend.

12. Do you have any pets?

Have a kitty cat, my parents spoil him too much tho.

13. How tall are you?

179cm. that's like 5'11"

14. Favorite subject in school?

mmm either Comp Sci or Art. Though they did give me a B in Art for my optical illusion final so still a little salty.

15. Dream job?

Game Dev 100%. I want to code and make games. Writing story, pitching ideas, implementing it all into code, seeing the story come to life, all that jazz.

Don't like tagging so yall, feel tagged spiritually.

15 Questions Game

Tagged by @jenolicho <3

1. Were you named after anybody?

I was named after both my grandfathers, but that's my deadname lol

2. When was the last time you cried?

I cried a few weeks ago because of a shitty day at work :(

3. Do you have kids?

I sure hope not

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

I'm very sarcastic, and my voice is super monotone so I always sound like I'm being sarcastic even when I'm being genuine

5. What sports do you play/have played?

I used to do baseball as a kid, I did soccer for a couple years (lots of fun), and I dabbled in archery

6. What's the first thing you notice about someone?

I remember how they act and any really defining physical characteristics. Beyond that, I cannot hold onto faces or names until like round 2 or 3

7. Eye color?

I have really dark green eyes with a ring of brown around the pupil, so it looks like I have brown eyes unless we're in making-out-distance

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

I love scary movies and horror, and overall I connect and vibe with bittersweet endings over happy ones

9. Any special talents?

I'm a writer, I can burp on command, I'm a fairly good voice actor (despite being monotonous, I can do a lot of accents n characters), and I can do the footloose dance

10. Where were you born?

I was born in Texas and thankfully don't live there anymore

11. What are your hobbies?

I love to read and write, brainstorm ideas for things to write, or play DnD/Call of Cthulhu/other TTRPGS

12. Do you have any pets?

I have a cat! A calico named Yog-Sothoth

13. How tall are you?

Between 5'9" and 5'10", or 175-176 cm

14. Favorite subject in school?

I always loved science, and math was something I grokked easily

15. Dream job?

I'd love to be an author, but the kind of author that travels the world

Tagging: @spideercabossed @sleepystellarsister @wolf-kisssed @local-vampire-queen @hummerous @nintendowiimote @polymoth

[sunntownn]

➪

,,GN! reader,, romantic relationship

➪

,, getting a request from my favorite space robot author???? on my birthday????? bro,, imma cry deadass,,

➪

,, TW!! ,, kidnapping

➪

,, word count,, 1111

𝐊𝐕 𝐑𝐀𝐕𝐀𝐆𝐄

▪︎ when ravage was deployed from soundwave and sent down to earth to assist in megatron's arrival, you happened to have chosen the wrong spot to eat during your lunch break

▪︎ lets be honest, if you were stuck in some underground secret military facility all damn day staring at some space junk while topside was a beautiful veiw of the afternoon orange sun bouncing of the waves of the ocean as they crashed against the sand like a beautiful melody, then you'd eat you there too (and you are you, so, lucky you)

▪︎ you had nearly choked on your food when a giant robot space cat the size of your car ran right fucking passed you.

it's tail scraped your cheek and drew blood

▪︎ you were a witness that would alert the authorities if they had let you go, so, horray you're kind of a hostage?

▪︎ you didnt really serve as much of a threat so they werent quite worried about watching you constantly, however ravage kept one oversized optic on you at all times

▪︎ the original plan was to smush you, but you had approached ravage with headpats. and although his grumpy ass wouldn't admit it, he liked the headpats :(

▪︎ convinces megatron to let you stay, something along the lines of "the human scientist has been studying the fragment of the alspark far longer than any Cybertronian has had the pleasure of holding it" as to prove your usefulness and what-not

▪︎ just wanted more headpats,,

▪︎ after a while ravage's affections towards you became more noticeable among the cons and they left him be, not without a few comments tho

▪︎ eventually you two would find yourselves head bumping each other and being all too cozy for a Cybertronian and an organic

▪︎ lucky for you, the old abandoned building the cons had been using as their temporary base of operations used to be a common meet up spot for petty thievery

▪︎ unluckly for whatever crooks left thier junk behind when the cons showed up and squished them, they left some valuable entertainment for a kind-of-prisoner

▪︎ ravage watched you plug up the television, casually lounging on the platform like a lazy house cat

▪︎ however when the just dance home screen popped up, poor kitty was so confused 😕

▪︎ why are the human in the recordings so,, colorful? where are their features? where did the backup dancers come from? why are they moving like that??????

▪︎ you quickly searched up a song and stood up in front of the tv

▪︎ if ravage had an eyebrow, or ya know, another eye, he would be this emoji 🤨 but with cat ears

▪︎ and then you started copying the stangly feature-less rainbow humans

︎▪︎hes mortified

▪︎ has no idea whats happening,, completely baffled in a traumatizing way,,

▪︎ at first he tries to come up with a logical reason to this... activity,, he comes up with nothing

▪︎ stabs the tv with his tail

𝐓𝐅𝐀 𝐁𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐙𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐆

▪︎ icy was fronting when he walked up to your little station at the decepticon base

▪︎ after blitzwing astablished your inter-species relationship with megatron and the other cons, and a genuine interest and loyalty to the decepticon cause, megatron had allowed you to stay with your partner and blitzwing even got to constructicons to build you a platform and private room

▪︎ he mass displaced and entered your shared "home" only to see you dancing in the living room to lady gaga

▪︎ "what is this?"

▪︎ you shrieked in embarrassment and swung around to face your lover with a flushed face

▪︎ "...just dance?" you were not expecting him to come back so soon, he had a lot of tasks megatron wanted completed today so you had decided to push the coffee table outta the way and get in some cario undisturbed in the most fun way

▪︎ why do yoga when you can just dance

▪︎ icy switched to random and he grinned wildly "oooooo! lez me try!" and all but rushed to your side and immediately started following the little person on the tv

▪︎ honestly, you expected as such, but the embarrassment of getting caught doing cringy dance moves to lady gaga pop songs made you feel super awkward

▪︎ blitzwing seemed to be enjoying himself though, hothead would show up if he got a move wrong but you assured him that getting it right wasnt important, that it was just a fun way to get active

▪︎ icy was very persise in his dance moves and even asked you to replay to song so he could get it down right

▪︎ eventually the embarrassment simmered away and you joined your partner, laughing as you both danced

▪︎ random would switch up and start twerking

𝐓𝐅𝐏 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐃𝐎𝐖𝐍

▪︎ being with breakdown was a mixture between very serious and intimidating moments and very laid back and soft moments

▪︎ this dude's whole thing is breaking things,, its literally in his name,, and he can be scary when he wants too,, but he can also be a complete love-sick idiot

▪︎ breakdown was the only higher ranking officer to show veihcons any for of respect or recognition for their hard work and to no abuse them or toment them in any way

▪︎ he knows when agression is and is not necessary

▪︎ but when he walked into his berthroom to see you unashamedly dancing on his berth with your laptop playing just dance videos, he didnt know what the appropriate way to react was

▪︎ he wasnt trained for this! this didnt come in the inter-spieces relationship handbook knockout gave him! or in the dating-while-being-a-decepticon handbook that knockout also gave him

▪︎ mans just wants to make his tiny human happy buy doenst actually kniw anything about humans

▪︎ "dont just stand there come join me!" you yelled while literally doing the weridest dance move he had ever seen

▪︎ eventually you put on something more slow paced and easier to get used to

▪︎ its the robot

▪︎ you played the robot dance

▪︎ he does the worst robot dance you have ever seen

▪︎ and he is a robot

▪︎ crappy dance lessons comence at 2am

▪︎ ....

▪︎ knockout walks in at 6am to you passed out on your bed and breakdown is aggressively doing the whip and nae nae

[moss-sauce]

WOE!!! KITTY KITTY TREATMENT UPON THUNDER AND SHINY

[ao3 link]

‘Take a nice walk, you guys!’ Alex said. ‘It’ll be good for you!’ she said. ‘It’ll help you relax and unwind!” Thunder scowls.

“I have no complications regarding ‘relaxing’,” he had argued. “As a defender, I have minimal amount of time to allow my guard to be down, let alone--”

Alex had given him The Look. The “you better stop arguing and do what I told you to do whether you actually want to or not” Look.

Reluctantly, he’d given in--to Alex’s demands, however. Shiny’s obnoxious begging had no part in the decision. Still, agreeing made him quiet down enough to think properly.

Shiny’s irregularly-paced, heel-heavy footsteps startle all the wildlife Thunder would have usually enjoyed watching. Rabbits and smaller creatures dash out from brush to avoid being caught underfoot, moving quickly and without grace. Birds flock from trees in a blind panic. Thunder inwardly cringes at the thought of what could be caught under Shiny’s feet at this pace.

“Shiny,” he tries to keep his voice even. “Walk evenly. Stay on the predetermined path. Please?”

Shiny gives him a bewildered look, yellow optics wide. “What happened to you?” he asks rhetorically. “Thunder never says ‘please’. You sure you’re alright, little bro?”

Thunder has to bite back an explanation. Of course it’s him. He’s always been himself. Why is using courtesy something unexpected of him?

“Besides,” Shiny stops for a moment to gesture around him, “it makes all the animals come out! We can see them better, actually.”

Thunder’s frown deepens. “Technically correct. However, it ruins the opportunity for natural, uninterrupted observation of the creatures.” He tilts his head quizzically. “Would you not rather watch them in their natural state and environment rather than fleeing potential danger?”

Shiny gives him a blank look in return. “As long as I get to see ‘em, I’m good.”

Thunder’s hand twitches as he holds back the urge to run it down his face in exasperation (something he picked up from Colonel Creed, he presumes). “Why don’t we both stay quiet. Agreed?”

“Oh!” Shiny gasps. “Like who can stay quieter? I’m good at that. Starting right now, I’ll be quiet.” He makes the gesture of zipping his mouth shut.

It feels as if a tangible weight is lifted off Thunder’s great shoulders. Finally, finally, some peace and quiet. They both stop at a small clearing and settle to watch. Unfortunately, the previous rancor seems to have scared just about all there is to see away. Still, Thunder can look up at the clouds instead of on the ground, he presumes.

The silence is heavenly. He can still hear Shiny fidgeting from where he sits, but the other guardian says nothing. 

Thunder relishes in the absence of sound and action. For a moment, he even lets his optics go offline and simply exists in the moment.

A tap on his shoulder.

Maybe if he ignores it, Shiny will get the point and leave him alone.

Another tap, more insistent.

Thunder continues ignoring it.

Finally, Shiny grabs his pauldron and shakes, literally rattling Thunder out of his thoughts. He swivels his head to look at the other, his ire clear on display, but Shiny is shushing him. Both of their gazes focus on what has shown up. Shiny barely manages to hold back any sound he wants to make, though some squeaks manage to slip through.

“Do you see what I see?” Shiny pings him through their communication link.

Thunder focuses in on where Shiny is pointing.

He has to focus precisely to see the little thing on the ground next to him. It’s small, fuzzy, and staring back at the both of them with wide green eyes. 

Thunder tilts his head again. “It’s--”

“I know!” Shiny whispers excitedly. His eyes return to the little furball, as if in a trance.

While Thunder may not be well-versed in the taxonomy of most earth creatures, he can recognize this one. “A feline. Felis catus.” He debates whether he should continue. “I will admit, it is rather cute.”

Fortunately, Shiny seems so enamored with the little cat that he doesn’t respond to that slip in words--either that, or he plain just didn’t hear it. Thunder has to resist covering his audio receptors as Shiny coos to the thing in as gentle of a manner as a kaiju-fighting class robot can.

He steps closer, carefully. He’s been told stepping on humans is not a good thing, and it is likewise true for such a thing with creatures. Thunder mirrors Shiny’s posture, crouching down to look closer.

He’s able to tune out Shiny’s rambling after a while. All of Thunder’s attention focuses on the cat: brown and black with a little pink nose spattered with spots. He runs through his databanks to find the word for the coloration. Calico? No, not quite. Certainly not a tabby. After a moment, he locates the term: tortoiseshell.

The cat seems unfazed by Shiny. Thunder can tell that the other desperately wants to touch and pet the cat--which he realizes is a her-- but keeps a respectable distance to avoid any unintended harm. It’s the most held-back display of control Thunder has seen from Shiny so far.

“Look at her, Thunder! She looks like she rolled in dirt! But it’s permanent!” Shiny gasps loudly. “And her nose, it’s got little specks on it! Look!”

“I can see her just fine from where I am,” Thunder grumbles. He won’t admit it out loud but he would enjoy a closer inspection of the tortoiseshell. He’s heard many things about these animals: the ability to always land on their feet, for example. The “nine lives” phrase shows up frequently as well.

Distantly, he senses someone pinging him again. When he realizes it’s not Shiny, he politely ignores it and continues to gawk at the cat.

“Little bro, I think Alex wants us back at EDF base,” Shiny interrupts him from his daze. “We gotta go.”

Thunder balks. “And just leave her here?”

“I mean,” Shiny fumbles over words. “Yeah? She lives out here, technically. We dunno if she has an owner or not.”

Feigning resignation, he stands back up. “You are right.” He looks down at her again. “Hopefully nothing harmful happens to her.” He pauses. “Like larger predatory animals. Or birds of prey. Or ill-tempered humans. Kaiju, even.”

Shiny gawks at his “brother”. “You’re not saying that…?”

“ She seems to be completely alone and under no guardian supervision,” Thunder replies primly.

“Are you saying what I think you’re saying?” Shiny’s eyes dilate excitedly.

“Perhaps. Your thoughts are tumultuous and unpredictable. I am ‘saying’ that we bring her back, discreetly.” He emphasizes.

“We’re keeping her!” Shiny bellows at the empty forest around them, startling out even more animals from their hiding places. “Oh, Thunder! What should her name be? She looks like she has dirt or mud on her. Maybe we call her that: Dirt.” A pause. “No, that’s too plain. We can call her Muddy! Mud, for short.”

Thunder is too busy stooping over to herd the cat into one of his massive palms to hear Shiny’s ramblings. The cat doesn’t need much prompting; she hops into his hand readily and sniffs around.

“Now,” Thunder tensely says, “to get her back to the EDF base without her being noticed.”