#and then she gave a condescending laugh and it tripped my recognition for her ''you're kate walsh!!! :D'' she's always fun

[sharkneto]

did you ever watch fargo? it has similar story beats to true detective, at least, season one (it’s another anthology type series, crime focused) there’s a dude in there who i think you’d get a kick out out of… very much quietly intensely batshit insane and Off™️ but somehow presents himself as the sanest one in the room. he’s rust cohle, in a way, but murderer, not detective

Thanks for the rec! Watched S1 over the past week or so. Was good but it frustrated me. Billy Bob Thornton Serial Killer was the highlight, you were right! He was very fun. What a weirdo.

I don't know if it was that I grew up in an area with accents like theirs so I was like, hyper aware They Are Doing An Accent, or that it was based on Coen Brother's work, but a lot of the characters felt... rather like caricatures? I don't know, something about it had a wall between me and it, where I wasn't immersed so they felt like We Are Actors On A Set Delivering Lines Really Well rather than I was in the moment, if that makes any sense. Maybe it was the monologues, Flannigan series can have the same affect to me.

Still, was a really good cast. I needed Martin Freeman to get his comeuppence like three episodes sooner, my god that man could just wiggle out of everything (SPOILER he sent his wife to get shot???? what the fuck is wrong with him. I was screaming SPOILER OVER). I always like it when Colin Hanks pops up in things. Allison Tolman and Billy Bob Thornton fucking carried the whole thing, they were the only two I didn't really get the I Am Delivering Lines With Emotion And This Thick Minnesotan Accent feeling.

Writing was generally tight, too. Good full circle moments and Chekov's guns, pieces came together in satisfying ways. Was fun to be rooting for Molly to catch her killers and for Billy Bob to fucking get Martin Freeman. I think it could have been one episode shorter, or skipped the time jump, to give the police a modicum more competence, they were killing me.

Idk if I'll watch the other seasons, I did enjoy it overall. Might check out the newest one because I'm a slut for Jon Hamm.

[atsumumiyasimpgirltm]

Driver’s License- (Atsumu Miya x F!Reader)

Pairings: Atsumu Miya x F!reader

Warnings: mentions of smoking, language

Genre: Angst

Type: Songfic

Word Count: 2972

A/N:  I totally didn’t write this for myself no way self indulgence wHO’s thAT??? Maybe I’ll write a part 2

Song: Driver’s License- Olivia Rodrigo

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I got my driver's license last week

You had turned 16 a week before, and had gotten your driver’s license the day after. At the DMV, you took your photo, smiling through your pain like you always did, because you were a good girl, weren’t you? You didn’t get mad, or cry over stupid things, no, not you. 

Just like we always talked about

You remembered the late night sleepovers when you were kids, talking about what high school would be like, and making up funny scenarios based on the movies you saw on the television. It was during one of those late nights when Atsumu had asked, “do you love me?” and patiently waited for an answer.

'Cause you were so excited for me

He was older than you, and he always boasted about being able to drive before you. You always rolled your eyes and laughed, texting him to ask for a ride somewhere or to just pick you up so you could sit in the car and talk.

To finally drive up to your house

Atsumu swore to you that the day you got your driver’s license, you’d go somewhere together. Maybe find an empty highway and cruise for a while, going nowhere just to ease the stress off. Maybe it’d be a mini one day road trip, and you could hit all the spots that you had been to as kids. You could be kids again, just for a little bit.

But today I drove through the suburbs

He swore, he crossed his heart, he promised, but when you texted him to inform him of the news, he texted back with a simple “I’m busy,” breaking the illusion that you held on your friendship with him.

Crying 'cause you weren't around

Devastated, you got into your car and fulfilled the promise yourself, aimlessly driving through your neighborhood, no destination in mind. It was no empty highway, but it numbed the shock that you felt.

And you're probably with that blonde girl

Later, he texted saying he was with someone, and you immediately knew, it was that girl. The one who was so pretty, the one who everyone adored or admired, the one who no one could say a single negative thing about, because anything negative was automatically spun into a compliment. Atsumu had talked about her once or twice, saying that they did things together on the weekends.

Who always made me doubt

You used to be acquainted  with her, and she repeatedly insisted that ‘You and Atsumu would look so cute together.’ For a girl a year older than you to say that? It gave you reason, reason to think that maybe he’d want you. There was always something off about her, she was too sweet to be real, too perfect. Who would have guessed that she was a backstabbing bitch? But you couldn’t even say that out loud could you? Because if you did, everyone would tell you ‘she knows what she wants’ or ‘she’s ambitious and is willing to take necessary steps to get to her goals.’ 

She's so much older than me

In the year above you, she was a second year when you and Atsumu were in your first. It was a wonder how he ever met her in the first place, he never accelerated any classes. Maybe it was fate bringing them together, as many would say. Or maybe, it wasn’t fate for them to be together, but fate punishing you for being too passive, too much of a watcher.

She's everything I'm insecure about

She was tall, she had long unmarked legs and clear skin. A small waist and big eyes ringed a shifting color with brown in the center. Every time you saw her, you wanted to put her disgustingly pretty face into the floor for being everything you were not, for giving you just an ounce of hope and then taking it away. 

Yeah, today I drove through the suburbs

You needed to clear your head again. Still sitting on the hope that maybe, just maybe, Atsumu would realize she wasn’t for him, 

You started the car, senses perking up. The engine was loud, and drowned out your thoughts, the inside of the car smelled like mints, and the leather of the steering wheel cover was rough under your hands. 

'Cause how could I ever love someone else?

Driving in the direction of Atsumu’s home, you slowed when you saw his porch light on, grateful that the tint on your windows concealed you from any onlookers. 

And I know we weren't perfect

When you slowed at the curb opposite to his house, you saw Atsumu and the girl, sitting on plastic chairs, laughing about something, and smoking menthols. The girl pulled the rolled piece of paper from her mouth with French manicured nails, and placed her hand on his arm. He beamed, at the physical contact. Whether it was from the buzz the nicotine gave him or her you would never know. A sour taste, not too far from the taste of smoke, filled your mouth. Since when did he do illegal things?

But I've never felt this way for no one

The girl’s head raised, and she whispered something to Atsumu. He looked across the street at your car, making accidental eye contact- not that he knew-  through the driver’s side window. For a second, you watched him through the glass, contemplating whether or not to get out to confront him.

And I just can't imagine

Atsumu cocked his head to the side, most likely in recognition of your car, but if he wanted to communicate, he didn’t do so, instead turning back to the girl and reassuring her that “It’s nothing.” Ignoring the warnings from your parents telling you not to drive in platform shoes, you turned the car from your parallel parked position on the curb, and floored the gas pedal as hard as you could, escaping off of Atsumu’s street before the tears came. 

How you could be so okay now that I'm gone

The next day at school, you walked up to the roof, expecting Atsumu to be waiting with Osamu and Aran like he usually was. That was your routine, the routine you had formed back in elementary school, and had followed every single day since then. Every single day but today and the days to follow, because when you ascended the stairs to the roof, you spotted Atsumu and the girl, deep in conversation about something, Osamu and Aran nowhere in sight.  You felt yourself being torn apart as you watched their interactions, so effortless and easy despite having only met a couple weeks prior to this event. A feat that took you months of talking with Atsumu to get. Rage filled every crevice in your body, and it pulsed through your arteries. It was being pumped by your heart, and soon, you were so filled with it that with all the strength you had, threw your bento box straight between them.

Guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me

They looked up at you, conversation having been stopped by your projectile bento box, and after registering the disturbance, both glared at you. It wasn’t fair, it wasn’t fucking fair. For this girl to come and take everything from you, your best friend, your closest friend, it wasn’t fair for her to come and break all the promises that you and Atsumu had made.

'Cause you said forever, now I drive alone past your street

“So much for ‘friends forever!’” You angrily folded your arms, taking a final look at them before turning yourself around and untucking your shirt to wipe away tears. 

“What’s her problem?” You heard in a condescending high pitched voice. 

A scoff and then, in a much deeper voice:  “She’s just pissed about a promise we made when we were kids.”

You ran as far as you possibly could from them, and tried to find your other friends, your real  friends. 

And all my friends are tired

Entering the cafeteria, you found Osamu and Aran at a table in the cafeteria, most likely having been exiled by Atsumu to accommodate for his new friend. Seeing that you had no lunch, Osamu pushed an onigiri towards you, and Aran offered you half of an apple. They both looked at you with pity.

Of hearing how much I miss you

You spent that entire lunch talking about how much Atsumu’s new ‘just friend’ pissed you off. You talked about how much she angered you, how she was too perfect, how she was a bad influence on him, and how with her, you were always going to be the villain, the person who was keeping them apart, and the second place.

But I kinda feel sorry for them

Aran and Osamu, being the good listeners they were, ate up your words, and didn’t disregard a thing you had said. They didn’t tell you that she was ‘ambitious’ or ‘doing what she knew she had to do,’ they didn’t tell you to stop being oversensitive or that people come and go, They just sat and listened to you, and when it was over, patted your back and fed you lies about how “Everything is going to be okay.”

'Cause they'll never know you the way that I do, yeah

But nothing would be okay, not as long as Atsumu and the pretty blonde girl were together, Neither Aran nor Osamu knew the Atsumu you knew, the one who would call at midnight asking if you wanted to go to Walmart, the one who would drop everything he was doing to hang out with you. The Atsumu that was gone now all because of one person.

Today I drove through the suburbs

After school that same day, you waited until the sun was on the horizon, painting the sky around you pretty pinks and oranges, a contrast to the way you were feeling. You sat on your curb until you felt the time was right, then, you got into your car and drove to one of the only places you had ever felt safe.

And pictured I was driving home to you

And maybe it wasn’t the place, but the person who made it a safe space, because when you pulled into the street, seeing the familiar glow of porch lights, the sound of loud laughter, and the minty smell of menthol- different from the smell in your car, you were brought back to that night, and immediately wanted to turn back and drive anywhere but here.

And I know we weren't perfect

Ignoring the bad feeling that surrounded your mind, you slowly drove through the street, pulling into your spot on the opposite sidewalk curb.

But I've never felt this way for no one

Just in time to observe the silence that fell between the pair. This was it! This was when Atsumu realized that she wasn’t the one! Everything would be fixed now, and you could all go back to the way it was the before, the normal way, the better way.

And I just can't imagine

You leaned your arm against the window, and stoically watched the girl lean back into her chair. Atsumu did the opposite, and leaned forward. 

How you could be so okay now that I'm gone

He kissed the girl, and suddenly, you couldn’t hear anything. Not the soft music playing in your car, nor the buzzing of the street light. The only thing you heard was ringing, an alarm telling you your time was up. Vision filling with tears, the same taste from the last incident filled your mouth.

I guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me

Just like last time, you pulled off the curb, but Atsumu and the girl were too entranced with each other to notice. The joints on your knuckles turned white from your too tight grip on the wheel, and your eyes stung. You drove as fast as you could to nowhere.

'Cause you said forever, now I drive alone past your street

Every morning while driving to school, you had to drive past his house. Involuntarily, your grip around the steering wheel always tightened when you passed the sign, and you would relax after you had passed it.

Red lights, stop signs

In his car, you’d always play red light games, seeing who could memorize the most license plates from the last light, or who had the stupidest bumper sticker. When driving, you hated the red lights, you hated every second that you had to wait for them to turn green, every second that reminded you of the tragedy you had witnessed in this very seat.

I still see your face in the white cars, front yards

Every white vehicle that passed by reminded you of him and his car. Regardless if it was a sports car or not, you always watched it until it passed out of your sight and turned the street’s corner, because you had to hope that maybe it was Atsumu, coming back to you.

Can't drive past the places we used to go to

You tried to sit down at the children’s park, at the top of the slide, another one of your safe spaces. It felt empty without your best friend at your side, and that same day, you saw Atsumu and the girl walking towards it. How could he have done that? How could he have the sacred space that you two had shared since you were kids with this outsider, because that’s all she would ever be to you. Needless to say, you left quickly, before you could be seen, and didn’t come back to the park again.

'Cause I still fuckin' love you, babe 

It was so painfully obvious that you were in love with Atsumu, that you still were. Everytime his name was mentioned, a salty look crossed your face, and you made a great effort to change the topic, taking leaps and bounds to avoid him, and when you could, ignoring him in favor of talking to Aran and Osamu.

Sidewalks we crossed

Even getting drinks at the 7-Eleven was painful. Every crosswalk and curb had a story revolving around the two of you, your entire friendship’s history could be traced here, and now, it was all gone with no one to remember it, because Atsumu had found someone else, and you were left in too much pain to even try.

I still hear your voice in the traffic

As you walked, you touched every light pole and stopped at every spot on the sidewalk that you had a memory on. You reaccounted the stories, the memories, the past, and tried to get lost in the good so you could push away the bad.

We're laughing over all the noise

Noise coming from a group of young teens, probably first years, entered your ears. It was loud, boisterous laughter, the type that you and Atsumu had shared outside this very 7-Eleven over the course of many years.

God, I'm so blue, know we're through

And as you walked into the small store and filled your Slurpee, you looked down at the tiled floor, a stain from where Atsumu had accidentally opened and spilled an entire hair dye packet. The dread that you had been suppressing came back in a wave, crashing over you.

But I still fuckin' love you, babe 

You exited the store with your Slurpee, drinking it slowly through the straw. The walk from the parking lot to the sidewalk felt longer than it ever had, even though it was only five seconds. Too many memories in this very place, and not nearly enough time.

I know we weren't perfect

What had you done wrong? It must have been something, because good things happen to people who do things right. If you do things right, you’ll get what you want, always, right?

But I've never felt this way for no one

But you hadn’t calculated for one factor: The perfect girl with the perfect life. The girl who had everything you didn’t, who was everything you were not. And even though you had done everything correct, she had ruined everything.

And I just can't imagine

Walking home, you stopped briefly at Atsumu’s street sign like you always did when walking this way, but unlike the other days, you had never thought of going back. It had always seemed like an impossible option for you, too much to bear for your fragile mind.

How you could be so okay now that I'm gone

Your hands shook as you held your Slurpee in your hands, either from the coldness around you or from the tears that threatened to ruin you. You didn’t get cold often, so of course you knew the answer to that question. 

Guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me

Looking down the street you saw the same porch light on, and the same sounds and smells you always got when you had passed by in recent times: Loud laughter and menthol. 

'Cause you said forever, now I drive alone past your street

You wished that you had told him “yes” that night at the sleepover. Maybe you could have avoided the heartbreak, and maybe he could have too, but all you had told him was that you’d be friends no matter what, too scared to tell him that you were most definitely in love with him. Or maybe you didn’t know, a childish mind unable to identify the feeling. It didn’t matter now, all you and he had done was stick out your pinkies to solidify the promise- “Friends forever.”

Yeah, you said forever, now I drive alone past your street

You crossed the street, traveling away from the laughter and menthol, away from your supposed forever, and didn’t look back.