#and then it turns into ''well jt wasnt even worth it to 'save' you''
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Truly like we are always just a step or two away from reaching the point where we careen off a mountain side
#im so sick of this life#i cant live like this forever#i feel no motivation either like#idk sometimes i have motivation in the sense that LOGICALLY i know we have stuff to live for#like our partner and friends and cats#but other than that. it just becomes hard to logic out staying alive :/#i have no goals. no aspirations#no escape from here#i cant even entertain the idea of trying to sorta get along with our mom because obvioudly thay just sets dad off#and then it turns into ''well jt wasnt even worth it to 'save' you''#as if he wasnt just letting it happen for what?? 18+ years???#as if he wasnt also beating on us and being a fucking insane horrible man#as if he was a SAINT#youre not a saint for finally doing something cause your favorite child got hit instead John.#you're just a fucking evil evil man#with evil intentions and a gnarled ugly soul
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