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cutecinnamon · 9 months ago

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"A Broken Teacup" { Postwar Levi x Reader Oneshot }

CW: ⊹₊ Angst and Eventual Comfort ⊹₊ Pregnancy ⊹₊ Mention of Intimate Moments ⊹₊ Mention of a Character Death ⊹₊ Writing this made me cry a bit ⊹₊ ( I need a hug ) ໒꒰ྀིっ˕ -｡꒱ྀི১

• 3,096 word count •

:gif from pinterest

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Synopsis:

(y/n) was Levi's caretaker, close friend and former squadmate. After the rumbling and the death of Hange,

Hange has left a void at Levi's heart that (y/n) can't fill.

After seeking warmth and comfort from each other, (y/n) ends up carrying Levi's baby.

Due to their complicated and unclear relationship mixed with the fact that they are both hurting, Another incident occurs, (y/n) accidentally knocked off Hange's favorite teacup from the kitchen counter, leading to a further strain in their relationship.

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After the rumbling that occured that wiped out eighty-percent of humanity, Levi ended up in a not so good state, he lost one of his eye and two of his fingers from the thunderspear explosion with Zeke. During the final war with Eren's titan form, Levi's leg was also damaged making him unable to move as efficiently as he did during his prime.

At a small little cozy house in Marley near the sea in a nearby small but warm village, Levi resided there, with his former squadmate (y/n).

Levi and (y/n) were both pretty close honestly, When Erwin and Hange were both still alive, they were the closest friends, Their bond with each other was more than just comrades and friends, They were like family.

Levi wasn't the expressive type, but (y/n) knew that Levi had strong emotions that he conveyed for the former Commander Hange, They were always close, Hange had this warmth in her that Levi needed, that Levi seeks for, They once even talked about living at a small cottage at the forest after everything was over when Levi was injured and Hange tended to his wounds. But everything shattered for Levi when she passed away due to a honorable sacrifice she made in order to save the squad and to save Humanity.

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The room was filled with the sounds of panting, (y/n) and Levi just finished an intimate activity in their sofa at their small dim living room. (y/n) knew that a void was left in Levi's heart, it was a huge void that even her love itself can't fill.

"Captain..." (y/n) burries herself into Levi's chest, sinking into his warmth.

Levi returns the warmth but his gaze falter,

"I'm sorry (y/n)..." He said in a somewhat monotone voice that conveyed sorrow,

(y/n) knew what it meant, she can never fill the void Hange had left the former Captain, She was the person Levi would always run to, the person Levi would seek comfort to, the person that will hold Levi's heart for the longest time.

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Two months had past prior to the intimate activity that Levi and (y/n) did, Levi noticed the change in her appetite, how she would always run to the sink as she threw up the contents from her stomach every morning, how she was more sensitive and emotional compared to the reserved and calm demanor she usually had.

Levi approached (y/n) as her head was at the sink again as she went through her new routine of retching and heaving every morning.

"Are you ok (y/n)?" Levi asked her, with concern evident in his tone of voice, he spoke to her in a gentle and calming tone, which was different from his usual monotone and stern demanor and way of communicating.

"I'm alright..." (y/n) replied as she wiped her mouth and opened the sink letting the water gush cleaning any remains of the component she just discarded.

Levi looked at her, his gaze held a mixture of concern and doubt as (y/n) tried to shrug off his question with the usual "I'm alright" line she uses.

"You're clearly not alright, I'm not blind (y/n) and I'm certainly not dumb." Levi said his voice still held the same concern but with a bit of sterness this time as he made sure to dig deeper into this matter.

"Captain... I..." (y/n) tried to speak but to no avail as she knew she was cornered at this rate and that eventually he'll find out sooner or later, heck she won't be able to hide this for the next few weeks once she starts to show.

Levi scanned her expressions, she was easy to read, Levi knew (y/n) well, she was an open book to him.

"You're carrying, are you not?" Levi asked her, his voice held a bit of hesitation but with certain firmness lacing it as he tried to delve deeper in this matter.

(y/n) just stared at him, her eyes were still a bit puffy due to the tears she shed earlier while threwing up. She did not mutter a single word which was already a dead giveway to Levi's lingering question.

Levi sighs, he knew the situation was not even close to ideal, hell it was very complicated at this rate since the life inside her was a result of him seeking for Hange's warmth and trying to find any bit of what he can recieve from (y/n).

(y/n) just stares at the floor her thoughts still spiraling from the endless loop of thoughts about the baby she was carrying, about her relationship with Levi and about Levi's love for Hange.

Levi's orbs also reflected the same, it carried a lot of emotions, mostly confusion on how to feel about this.

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A few more weeks had passed, Levi decided to do his best in terms of looking after (y/n) although they haven't discussed her pregnancy as much as an ideal expecting loving couple would do, he did try his best to keep his eye on her to make sure she was doing alright.

(y/n)'s heart was also at the verge of drowning from the weight its carrying. She felt lost, alone, and despite not wanting to admit it, she did crave for Levi's affection, support, and Love.

Both (y/n) and Levi grew up with no proper father and mother figure after their parents passed. Levi grew up at the underground and his mother Kuchel died when he was younger, leaving him with his uncle Kenny who also left him after teaching Levi how to fend for himself. (y/n) on the other hand was also left to fend for herself eversince she was young, as she had lost her parents at a young age. All she ever wanted was to give the baby she was carrying the life they truly deserved, a life better than what she and Levi had when they were younger.

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One Afternoon, (y/n) was washing the porcelain teacups and teapot after she prepared tea for her and Levi just like their usual routine, even though she was pregnant with their little one, she still kept his word to take care of Levi until he fully recovered, not wanting to leave his side despite knowing that his heart belongs to someone else.

After washing two porcelain teacups (y/n) stared at a specific one, a pearly white with blueish hue teacup that had a dainty pattern of small pink flowers, a teacup that held a lot of memory for the former Captain, It was Hange's favorite cup that she would always borrow from Levi when the squad or the superiors had their meetings, it was a cup that held a lot of memories and meanings to him, thats why until now, he made it clear that he wants to use that teacup despite the almost dozen of different pearly colored ones at their kitchen cabinet.

(y/n) gently placed the teacups and teapot at their kitchen counter, though what she didn't notice was their sink was somewhat broken as a small puddle of water from the calming flow from the faucet had already made its way at their kitchen floor making it wet and slippery.

(y/n) almost slipped at the floor, fortunately she managed to hold onto the kitchen counter but it had its price, as Hange's favorite pearly white teacup with blueish hue hit their cold kitchen floor.

Levi immediately came down the stairs from their shared bedroom, after hearing the loud thud, Levi stood there, his gaze not leaving the large chunks of porcelain at the floor that held the memories of the woman he holds in his heart dearly.

(y/n)'s orbs met Levi's gray orbs that also had a blueish hue to it, It held a lot of emotions that she was unable to read, if she was being honest she saw hate, anger, disappointement and sorrow.

"Le-Levi it was an accident... I..." (y/n) tried to explain but Levi cuts her off.

"Save it, I don't want to hear it (y/n)." Levi responds, trying to keep his tone in monotone, despite his anger visibly flaring up.

"Levi... I... I'm sorry... I almost slipped and I reached onto the counter and I... I didn't realize that I accidentally knocked off Hange's favorite cup..." (y/n) tried to explain, her voice was shaking as she was at the verge of tearing up in front of him, she knew the importance of the cup, Hange was a dear friend to her, Erwin and Levi.

(y/n) also knew how much she meant to Levi and how he always tries to find the reminders of her in the small little things that she left behind just like the now shattered pieces of porcelain at kitchen floor.

Levi looked at her, although he was hard to read (y/n) knew he despises her for what happened.

"Levi... please... please listen to me..." (y/n) said softly as she gently tugged the sleeves of Levi's white polo shirt.

"Do you even know how much that teacup means to me (y/n)?" Levi responded to her, his tone laced with anger which he hardly tried to supress.

(y/n) maintained eye contact with Levi, she prepared herself for the words that he might bombard at her, she knew she messed up badly and it was something she cannot fully mend.

"You know what (y/n), I don't know if you're just incompetent or stupid but, how can you expect someone like you who can't even take care of a fragile little teacup to take care of a damn little baby?" Levi asked her, his gaze piercing her.

It hurt, hearing Levi said that made (y/n) feel that she was not qualified, she was not enough to fill the void that Hange left and she accepted it, she was the one looking after Levi and giving him the care and attention he needed, but at the end of the day those words would slip from his mouth.

Levi's words impacted (y/n) a lot, which he never really intended. He was at the verge of anger and his mind was clouding his judgement and choice of words.

After glancing at (y/n) one final time he went back upstairs to their shared bedroom with his cane.

Immediately, (y/n) kneeled down the floor picking up the big chunks of shard, despite her hands getting small cuts and bruises from the former teacup, she did her best to pick up each and every piece delicately, she then placed it on top of the table as she searched their house for a hot glue gun, she knew it was dumb to try and fix something that was already shattered, but for all that mattered to (y/n) was Levi's happiness, even if it meant his forgiveness was uncertain.

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Levi's mind started to go back to his memories with Hange,

"Oi, four eyes, don't you dare touch my teacup again. You have your own." Levi said with his usual tone.

"Levi, stop being such a hot tempered Captain, if you continue to be like that you might scare all the cadets away." Hange responded with her usual cheery tone.

Hange was a contrast to Levi's cold attitude, and Levi admired that about her.

Levi remembered that Hange loves that teacup thats why he really did cherish it.

His mind then went back to the sight of (y/n) earlier, the way she was shaking and at the verge of tears from what happened. Levi knew that (y/n) would never do that on purpose, he knew (y/n) for a long time now, as she was also a close friend of his for a long time already and one of the most skilled scout in his former squad, she proved herself to him a lot of times already, especially now that she decided to stay behind and to look after him while he was recovering. Levi believes her when she told him she almost slipped at the floor and she accidentally knocked off the teacup, but his anger got the best of him.

Levi sighed as he made his way to the door grabbing his cane to check up on (y/n) he knew that she was in a fragile state due to her pregnancy, and he knew he had gone to far from the hurtful words he said to her.

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Quiet sobs were heard at the living room as (y/n) placed the last chunk of porcelain shard at the broken teacup, she managed to put everything back in place, it was back to how it is supposed to look like despite the cracks which were marks that it was already damaged, that it was already broken.

Levi's words from earlier continued to linger in (y/n)'s mind making her question if she was really capable of taking care of their little one which further added to her overwhelming emotions and anxiety.

(y/n) was still crying silently, trying to silence the quiet sobs she was unable to hold back, she really did care about Levi, she really did love him, even though his heart belonged to another.

(y/n) stared at the cup, her thoughts overwhelming her with emotions. She tried her best to make Levi happy, from cleaning their tiny house the way he wants it to be spotless, the way she tried to learn and cook the dishes that Levi loved, To dedicating her life into staying at Marley to tend to him while he recovers, and the way she tried to push her own happiness aside, she always tried her best to understand him. She was always there for him when he wanted to talk about Hange, when he was lost after the war.

She even came as far as making love with him to give him the comfort and warmth he needed, which resulted to their now growing baby in her womb.

Even if it did hurt her knowing that Levi will never see her the same way he did with Hange.

(y/n) heard foosteps from the stairs, breaking her from her thoughts, she then turned to see Levi, who was walking slowly with the help of his cane as he approaches her.

Levi saw the teacup, he then glances at (y/n)'s hands noticing the scratches, some are even covered with a bit of crimson colored blood, he also glanced at her face, her eyes were red and puffy from crying for a few hours now.

Levi made his way to their cabinet at the living room to grab a small box, it was a first aid kit, he then settles it at the table as he takes a sit next to (y/n).

Levi gently grabs (y/n)'s hands as he gently applied an ointment to it, disinfecting it, he then made sure to delicately wrap her hands with a clean bandage.

Levi saw how (y/n) didn't mind getting hurt, and that she disregarded the wounds at her hands for the sake of putting the teacup back in place, and this had an impact on him, he then started to look back to everything, her sacrifices to take care of him, and her willingness to carry their little one despite their unclear and complicated relationship.

(y/n) was still avoiding Levi's gaze but she managed to speak out a few words before being unable to control her tears again.

"I'm really sorry Levi... I really didn't mean to..." (y/n) said as tears started to fall down her cheeks.

"Shhh..." Levi gently wraps his arms around her small frame.

"I'm sorry (y/n) I shouldn't have snapped at you like that, instead of getting mad about the teacup breaking, I should've checked on you... to make sure you and our little one aren't hurt." Levi said to her with a soothing and comforting voice as he gently strokes her hair trying to calm her down from crying, which was honestly quite foreign, it was a softer side of him, (y/n) knew Levi had this side, but it was her first time to actually feel and experience it, this side of him was more understanding, caring and affectionate.

"I should've been more emotionally and physically available for you, I should be the one supporting you throughout your pregnancy. You have always taken care of me (y/n), and I hope this time maybe I can still make it up to you." Levi said his voice still laced with the softness and affection his eyes also glistening a bit from the tears he is holding back.

"Levi..." (y/n) called out to him as she continued to embrace him, not wanting to let go of his warmth.

"I give you my word (y/n) from now on we will both try to make this work, alright?"

Levi asked her, it was honestly more of like a statement since even if she did say no, he will forbid it.

"I want to give our little one a happy and loving family they deserve... I also want you to recieve the love you deserve (y/n)."

Levi slightly pulled away his orbs locking to

(y/n)'s glistening once.

They both gave each other a nod, it was like a pact to do their best for their baby to have the family they deserve, and to also open their hearts for love since after everything they've been through, they still have each other and maybe one day the void in Levi's heart will slowly be filled.

Levi glanced at the teacup although it was shattered, it was broken, it was still standing, it was still stable. Its pearly white color mixed with its blueish hue illuminating from the reflection of the moonlight through their window.

The teacup that once reminded him of Hange, now also reminded him of (y/n) in terms of how she did her best to pull herself together despite being hurt, despite being broken, despite everything they've been through. She was a strong woman and a capable mother for their little one.

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Eversince that day, Levi opened his heart for

(y/n) although Hange still had a piece of his heart, he was slowly starting to get better in accepting the love his pregnant partner was now giving him.

As time went on Levi continued to feel his once shattered heart and its once unfixable void, swell with love from his new family, (y/n) and their little one.

"I love you (y/n)..." Levi whispered to her ear while tucking a few strands of hair falling at her face, as she fell asleep leaning on his shoulder.

(y/n) slowly opened her already tired and heavy eyelids meeting Levi's gray orbs glancing at her with genuine love and affection as both their hands were now resting at her swollen belly as they feel their little baby girl kicking inside her womb.

"I Love you too Levi... thank you for loving me and our Little one." (y/n) said gently as Levi leaned forward, planting a gentle kiss at her forehead.

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Writing this honestly made me tear up, but I hope you all enjoyed this fic ໒꒰ྀིっ˕ -｡꒱ྀི১♡

Edited: I just proofread this morning since I published it late midnight a few hours ago, I fixed a few errors and edited a few words used,

Let me know if you are interested in a mini sequel incase, thank you again for your time, ♡

- Cinna

#levi x y/n #levi x reader #aot levi #aot #hange zoe #levi ackerman #snk levi #captain levi #attack on titan #fanfic #I want to cry why did I write this

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reikamoew · 3 months ago

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Levi's regrets in manga 136 - LeviHan's IF

This is a manga analysis. Levi and Hange's dynamics in the animation and the manga differ drastically.

If you believe there is more to their story as well as their individual character development than meet the eye, I highly advise you to ditch the animation for the manga. With all due respect to Mappa, but the final season erases almost every romantic hint between Levi and Hange, along with the twists in their story arcs.

Please brace for a ride. LeviHan in the manga is as complex as it is captivating. The complexity is further muddled with sloppy translations. I will provide the original Japanese versions of key lines where necessary.

Previously, before the forest scene, Levi was bent on killing Zeke to avenge his fallen comrades, fulfilling his oath to Erwin.

The first time Zeke escaped, Levi reaffirmed his oath to Erwin on the rooftop, and laid Erwin to rest.

The second time Zeke escaped, Levi was severely injured, and Hange came to his rescue.

Hange held Levi to her chest, jumped into the river and fled to a forest.

Let's begin with the forest scene in chapter 126. It is a turning point in Levi's oath arc.

Levi was already awake when Hange attended to his injury. In an intimate moment, he cracked open his good eye to look at her when she wasn't aware.

He was quietly listening to Hange, as he always did.

Hange speculated that Zeke planned to use Eren's Titan power to inflict catastrophe. Later, on the aircraft, Levi told Pieck that killing Zeke might end the Rumbling. The Rumbling did cease briefly after he chopped off Zeke's head.

Hange was also concerned about their fate as the last two veterans of Survey Corps. The only option for survival seemed to be running away and abandoning their duties.

Lastly, and most importantly, unaware that he was listening to her the whole time, she murmured:

"Why not we live here together, Levi?"

In Japanese culture, living together usually suggests romance or a relationship.

Note the white bar right under this panel.

It's a timer bar, indicating the passage of an uncertain, usually long, amount of time. Given that Hange had rebuilt the broken cart by the time Levi sat up, I'd estimate at least an hour had passed.

The fact that Levi cracked open his good eye and clearly heard Hange's soliloquy — from her speculation about Zeke to her unintended confession — proves that he had been wide awake.

It makes me wonder what Levi was thinking while pretending to be asleep.

One could only speculate.

I believe Levi was most likely imaging — as anyone would after hearing a shocking suggestion — the scenario of abandoning their duties to live together, only to then remember his oath to Erwin.

This internal conflict explains why he remained motionless.

It was the sudden Rumbling sound and Hange's scream that stopped Levi's from continuing to feign sleep. When their eyes met, he averted his gaze and asked about Zeke's whereabouts.

See how Levi tried to sound angry and eager to kill Zeke as a way to strengthen his determination, only after lying quietly there and allowing himself to be torn about this for such a long time?

Hange uncharacteristically blushed upon realizing that Levi heard her suggestion, which is another clue that "living together" goes beyond friendship.

Levi cheered Hange up, but didn't address her slip of heart. Then, Levi and Hange left the forest, seemingly determined to leave their ambivalent thoughts in the forest.

Killing Zeke, the right choice from the perspective of honor and duty, won this round.

Yet Hange's slip of heart clearly lingered in the back of Levi's mind.

When Levi overheard Hange and Pieck's conversation, which didn't involve him at all, he felt the need to comment on this.

This is extremely unusual and interesting.

When has Levi ever commented on others' love lives in the manga? The only time Levi remotely did so was years ago when Mikasa constantly prioritized Eren over their squad missions. As the squad leader, Levi said something along the line of, "I don't understand your obsession with him, but don't mess up this time."

(We all know how that obsession began. On hindsight, Levi's confusion foreshadowed his own future romance. Hange took care of Levi the way Eren took care of Mikasa, sparkling Ackerman' romantic attachment of a lifetime. )

Back to Levi's unusual, unnecessary, unsolicited comment.

Note he waited a bit for Pieck to leave to make sure it was a private conversation between him and Hange.

Levi said:

相変わらず巨人とは片想いのままだなクソメガネ

It roughtly translates as:

Your love has been unrequitted only with Titans, four eyes.

There is a Youtube video explaining the Japanese grammar of Levi's line, its hidden romantic connotation, as well as his bold choice of word for "love". The English translation loses all the nuance.

Besides, Hange's response isn't "I will charm her", but rather "We will become good friends". There is no romantic suggestion in her line regarding Pieck.

Simply put, Levi took the opportunity to express his feelings in an awkward and clumsy way. Unfortunately, Hange failed to pick up on that. I honestly think the look on Levi's face would have helped him be understood. But they stood with their backs to each other.

Fast forward to Levi and Hange's farewell.

The Survey Corps slogan is 心臓を捧げよ, aka Devote the Heart, without specifying whose heart it is.

It is supposed to mean devoting one's heart — represented by one's fist — to humanity.

（The gesture is based on human heart's anatomical structure: an individual's heart and fist are of similar size and shape.）

Levi's fist is Levi's heart.

In this iconic scene, Levi altered the Survey Corps' solute gesture to devote his heart to Hange, hence her shocked expression.

Hange, despite on the verge of tears, brushed it off with a laugh, pretending she doesn't understand the gesture. She left him to fulfill her duty as the Commander.

When meeting her fallend comrades in the Path, she heard Erwin say:

"Hange, you've fulfilled your duty."

(duty , or 役目 in the original Japanese manga. Remember this word)

As for Levi, he had to stay strong as the last veteran to lead the squad.

But you can see cracks through his tough facade. Like, he couldn't bring himself to look at what happened to Hange outside the window. Pieck, arguably one of the most perceptive characters, noticed this.

Or, when he directed kids' attention away, buying himself a moment to let agony take over.

Levi was clearly in the depths of pain and loss, triggered by Hange's death.

He was thinking. At this point we are just not sure what exactly went through his mind.

Levi's thoughts were revealed three chapters later, in chapter 136, in the form of a monologue.

His thoughts, under an intimidating image of Erwin in his mind, revolve around duty (役目).

Yep, the exact same word used in Hange's after-death scene with Erwin in chapter 132. I circled out the word 役目.

Hange and Levi didn't dare to abandon their duties in the forest to live together; Hange eventually died for hers.

Erwin's intimidating face in Levi's mind was a reminder that he needed to fulfill his duty — to kill Zeke. By far Levi appeared compliant, which makes his inner thoughts even more shocking.

Let's examine his first monologue line：

俺達の役目はあそこで終わりだったのかもしれない

It roughly translates as:

"Our duty .... may have ended there."

There: the moment he swore his oath to Erwin four years ago.

He wanted to dump his oath from the beginning !!!

Because it was this very oath that pushed him and Hange out of the forest, hence the grievance — or even resentment, I would say — towards the oath.

But abandoning the oath is not enough to prevent her death. In Hange's after-death scene, she complained to Erwin that being Commander was too tough.

Levi's next monologue line:

ガキ共をとど/海に届けるそこまでの役目だったとしたら

It roughtly translates as:

"We got those brats to the sea, if that's where our duty ended..."

Why end their duties at the sea？

Because after they reached the sea, Hange's burden as Commander grew increasingly heavy, eventually leading to her death.

Between Hange assuming the position of Commander and the expedition to the sea, things went quite smoothly. It only took a sour turn afterward.

In other words, Levi regretted not ending their duties four or three years earlier. He wanted to keep Hange alive and happy.

He wanted to live an alternative life with her.

Levi's next monologue questioned the inhumane side of Survey Corps' "devote the heart" indoctrination — the very tenet that drove Hange to go on the suicidal mission.

It was also the biggest reason Levi didn't dare to stop her: their fallen comrades were watching.

Remember her last words to Levi?

"You understand, Levi. I have a feeling.... It's my turn."

I will leave the detailed analysis for another day, but let's focus on Levi's regrets for now.

If you look at Levi's monologue in chapter 136 independently, on its own, it's beyond confusing, out of blue and out of place. Why would he suddenly think "our duty may have ended four years ago" in the middle of a deadly war?

The only logical explanation is that he had been ruminating on their duty the whole time.

Now we know what exactly went through Levi's mind.

Fascinatingly, there are some other clues.

One lies in the name of this chapter - 心臓を捧げよ (Devote the Heart) - a strong indication of the link between Levi's inner thoughts with his painful farewell to Hange in chapter 132.

Another glaring clue lies in "duty".

Isayama sensei even used the same Japanese word 役目 for duty in chapter 132 and chapter 136 to imply that Levi's monologue on duty was triggered by Hange's death.

In fact, the image of oath swearing in Levi's mind is reverted to imply the 180-degree shift from commitment to regret.

Before Levi's injury and Levihan's forest scene: commitement

After Hange's death: regret

The table has turned.

Right after Levi broke free the shackles of his oath, Zeke appeared. Levi killed him with one swift swing of sword. No torture for revenge this time, unlike before.

The Rumbling stopped. As Connie supported an injured Levi, he said: " It's not that I don't have regrets. But ... we stopped the Rumbling, it's the right thing to do, right?”

Connie doesn't have a story arc of regret or lack thereof.

It's more likely him voicing Levi's hidden regrets and Levi's changed intent in killing Zeke — not for revenge, but to stop the Rumbling.

It explains Levi's expression as he slightly looked up, staring into the void, clearly consumed by his inner turmoil with something or someone in his mind.

Levi wanted to end their missions years earlier for an alternative life with Hange. It's an IF scenario.

In essence, IF is to go back in time, making different choices.

In case there's any confusion about his regrets, he made it clear in his monologue that he doesn't regret letting Erwin go.

Well, Levi's syringe choice is another puzzle with a twist, no less stunning than the twist in his oath arc. I'd say it's a love letter from Levi to the woman with sparkling eyes, an innocent dream and a selfless spirit.

But the analysis may cause some controversy and wrath from certain fandoms, so please let me savor it for myself for now.

LeviHan is a fascinating, heart-breaking and complete arc. Hange's part is comparatively clear, while Levi's part is more in the dark, requiring quite some efforts to piece together the whole puzzle.

I will probably write about the heart arc, later.

In the final chapter 139, Levi's last panel focuses on his scar.

The pain and regrets will never really go away, because of the "what ifs" — of what could have been with her.

#levihan #levi ackerman #aot #hange zoe #snk #levi #hange #attack on titan #リヴァハン #リヴァイ

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youmakethelight · 2 months ago

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This is my truth tbh. Angela Kang babes why don't you and Melissa ride off into the sunset and leave all these men behind.

Literally just give me carol doing literally anything BUT being a side prop to daryl/darren's man pain.

Solo carol, carol & OC, carol & zeke (sue me - their divorced dynamic is cute and wholesome af), carol & fucking eugene idc, carol & lydia (not even joking that is a MISSED opportunity), carol & ash (obviously), carol & hallucination alpha (we don't talk enough about the explosive chemistry between samantha morton and melissa mcbride we really don't), carol & kelly, CAROL & CONNIE (actually this is a sick idea why didn't they do THIS??!), carol & maggie, carol & michonne (ok I know michonne has a fam, but if she can disappear for years to go find rick, she can go away with carol to talk through all that child loss bonding - also the plot could just be the same as dead city where they're looking for a kidnapped Judith* & RJ - and rick is just busy with smth else whatever, maybe he can make brief appearances - or he can be there too, but no cockblocking our girls pls), hang on hang on CAROL & JUDITH.

*I'm still processing the moment Judith recognised carol and said to her that her hair got REALLY long and carol said it DID, it was so cute and I may never recover, I fear.

No but actually Carol and Judith would be the BEST spin off idea. There is SO MUCH to explore there. Like rick destroying carol's self confidence in one fell swoop by banishing her from the prison bc he fears her being around while JUDITH is there (even though everything she did and does was to protect her and the other children and people she loved). The fact that Judith was present for Lizzie and Mika and the main reason they actually had to act on it the way they did. Just obviously the fact that Carol and Beth were the two who nurtured Judith the most as a baby. The fact that Carol knew and was friends with Lori and bonded with her over their children and while she was pregnant. The fact that Carol knew Carl, and that Sophia was friends with Carl, and that Sophia's death had a major impact on Carl. The shared trauma of lost children that Michonne and Carol share and thus she can help Judith understand her mum better. I could go on.

And they could take Dog with them. Like Daryl clearly doesn't care about him anymore, but he'd be a cute sort of proxy for Daryl and a reminder of home while they're spin-offing together.

Nah, I'm not done with this idea.

#also just to add - im not saying maggie doesnt deserve that spinoff - she 1000% does #i just would prefer a different story for her than having to spend time with negan #tboc #twd #caryl #the walking dead #the book if carol #melissa mcbride #carol peletier

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cosmicjoke · 8 months ago

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Levi and Zeke and the Way "Bad Boy" Demonstrates How Empathy Can Overcome Hardship:

One other point I want to make about how “Bad Boy” demonstrates Levi’s inherent goodness is by comparing what we realize is Levi’s single, good remembered experience with his mother, to Zeke’s own, multiple good experiences growing up, and how through their responses to those experiences, and through their divergent outcomes, we once again see the prevailing of nature over nurture in the world of “Attack on Titan”.

Zeke had numerous, clear and solid memories of being loved and cared for, both by Mr. Ksavar and by his grandparents. He had the love of Mr. Ksavar in his life into his late teens, and of his grandparents throughout his entire adulthood. Mr. Ksavar would play catch with Zeke and spend quality time with him just for the pleasure of his company and because he cared about Zeke’s well-being. And we see Zeke’s grandparents overjoyed at Zeke’s safe return from Marley’s war with the East, greeting him upon reentering Liberio, plainly relieved. They clearly loved him deeply. It's interesting to note, though, how Zeke could never see it. He was blind to it, and dismissive of it, because Zeke was always filled with this bitter hate, too wrapped up in his anger toward Grisha to notice he was loved by others all along, too addicted to his resentment to appreciate and cherish the love he had. He rather chose to believe he was unwanted and uncared for, giving in to the world’s cruelty because he was always cruel himself.

Levi, by contrast, had no clear or solid memory of his mother. All Levi had was a vague impression of her beauty. Of her elegance. A single memory from early childhood of them sharing tea together, and her smiling at him. We know it's only a vague impression that remains of her, because Levi says so, that the only thing he remembers clearly of her is her elegance, and also through the fact that, from Levi's perspective, we never see a fully clear shot of Kuchel's face. And yet, despite the obvious hardship of their lives together, the poverty and despair and deprivation, the filth of their surroundings and the hopelessness of their circumstances, and despite his final experience with his mother being one of pointless death and suffering, he remembered her with great fondness, and fought to preserve her in his memory. He held on to his one, good memory of her with fierce dedication and cherished it with all his heart, even romanticized it in his mind as being better than it surely was. Because Levi was always filled with kindness and compassion and gratitude, and always believed in those things, in spite of the suffering in his life. He even rebelled against the ugliness of the world by refusing to give up his one, good memory to it. He refused to give in to the world’s cruelty because he was always a good person.

And yet, it’s clear to me that that fleeting image of kindness from his mother wouldn't have been enough to overcome the years of cruelty, abuse and violence Levi was subjected to afterward unless Levi himself was already predisposed to being kind and compassionate. If he wasn’t simply naturally empathetic.

Levi’s childhood, I think, is meant to be directly contrasted with Zeke’s in particular.

Levi had a worse life than Zeke, and a worse childhood, by far, and yet, he remained a good man.

Zeke, by comparison, became an ever-increasingly bad man.

"Bad Boy" in many ways demonstrates to us how one’s nature, ultimately, is what decides who we are, not our environment, and also, I believe, how empathy, and the presence of empathy in our hearts, is what ultimately makes us strong, not weak.

Our environment can serve as a trigger for certain aspects of our natures and personalities coming out and manifesting, but it's never the root cause. It’s never the thing that creates those aspects of our personality. Those things have to be inborn. We have to have a predisposition to developing them. The same as how certain people are more predisposed to developing certain diseases than others.

It was Levi's inborn nature that allowed him to overcome the brutality of his childhood. An inborn strength, rooted in his inborn empathy.

Anyone who thinks Levi is weak for having been a victim, and for continuing to be impacted by the abuse he suffered, completely misses the entire point of this story. It's Levi's empathy that makes him strong. And yes, his sensitivity of heart makes him such that he's deeply impacted by and affected by his traumas. And yet, that in itself is the symbol of his strength. It's exactly because Levi is still impacted and still suffers the trauma of what he went through as a child, but in spite of that, continues to be the kindest, most compassionate character in the story, that marks him out as "humanity's strongest". It was always his heart that earned him that title, not his physical ability. That's what this story is, at it's center, actually about.

In contrast, we see demonstrated for us Zeke’s weakness.

Zeke allowed his childhood experiences to bring out his own, inherent cruelty. Zeke gave in to the cruel circumstances of his upbringing because of an inborn lack of empathy, and an inborn narcissism.

After all, one of the defining traits of narcissism is a lack of empathy.

"Bad Boy" demonstrates in the most stark terms a direct contrast between Levi’s childhood and Zeke’s, as well as Levi’s and Eren’s, and shows us how much stronger Levi always was than either of them.

Empathy, and the importance of empathy, is one of the core themes of AoT as a whole. So, it makes sense that the presence, or lack of it in each of these respective characters would serve to demonstrate that theme by showing us where each of them ends up as a result of either having or lacking empathy.

Through the divergence in Levi’s and Zeke’s paths, we see how it is that empathy actually makes us stronger, not weaker. We see how those with sensitive and kind hearts are the ones with true strength.

I think we also see this contrast between Levi and Zeke in their respective views of their abusive parental figures.

For Zeke, even his perception of his mother’s and father’s treatment of him is warped by his lack of empathy. Because, while they were certainly extremely abusive toward him, they still treated him as special and even necessary, not as unwanted or uncared for. He hated them, and particularly, he hated Grisha, and even wanted to exact revenge on him by accomplishing the exact opposite of what Grisha fought for, by destroying the Eldian race entirely. That is, for Zeke, really the underlying, root cause of his euthanasia plan, despite what he says about wanting to end other people's suffering. Zeke was absolutely convinced, through his self-absorption, that his parents didn’t want him, despite them never, really sending him that message, and he essentially decided to take his bitterness over that belief out on everyone else.

This is supported, I think, by the fact that Mr. Ksavar, whom Zeke got his antinatalism philosophy from, didn’t impart that philosophy to Zeke until Zeke was nearly full-grown, well out of any truly vital, childhood developmental stage. And Zeke’s idea to euthanize the Eldian race didn’t come from Mr. Ksavar at all. That was entirely Zeke’s own brainchild, rooted again, I think, in his desire to get back at Grisha, by destroying what he thought was Grisha’s dream. More important to note, still, is that before all this, Mr. Ksavar actually sent the distinct message to Zeke that his life mattered and that he was loved and wanted by telling him to turn his parents in to the authorities to save himself. He sent Zeke the message that his life was more important than his parents, that Mr. Ksavar himself saw it as a fair exchange, Grisha’s and Dina’s lives for Zeke’s.

For Levi, despite Kenny’s abuse and eventual abandonment of him, and despite introducing brutal violence and a disdain for life into Levi’s world by exposing him to and teaching him the practice of killing other human beings for sport, Levi never actually developed any, real hatred for Kenny, and never sought to exact any sort of vengeance on him, despite the trauma he subjected him to. And Kenny, by abandoning Levi without any explanation, truly did send Levi the message that he was unwanted. And yet, Levi never blamed Kenny for abandoning him. He never blamed Kenny for not wanting him. He blamed himself. He thought it was something inherently wrong in himself that made Kenny leave, some inherent lack of worth in himself. Despite all that, Levi still held the strong belief that the lives of others mattered. That the lives of others were worth protecting and preserving and fighting for.

Again, that comes down to empathy.

Levi was shown just as much as Zeke that his life was worthless; through his environment, through his upbringing, and through the people he found himself surrounded by growing up, through their treatment of him. And we see that feeling of worthlessness in Levi demonstrated in “Bad Boy” through his plain suicidal ideation and actions.

But we never see Levi project that sense of worthlessness onto others the way Zeke does.

Again, because he has empathy. Because it’s a quality he was born with.

Levi is able to see and recognize the thoughts, feelings and desires of people outside of himself. Because he’s able to see and recognize other people as individuals, and because he doesn’t need to be able to directly relate to or see himself in people in order to respect them and acknowledge them as legitimate and real. He doesn’t need to be able to directly relate to other people in order to connect with them.

Zeke wasn’t able to do that because Zeke never had empathy. It was a quality he was born without. It’s why Zeke believes so strongly that the lives of everyone are worthless. Because he’s unable to recognize that just because he feels and believes his own life is worthless, that doesn’t make it true for others. It’s why he’s unable to understand that his own experiences, beliefs and feelings don’t give him the right decide that for others. It's why he does project his feelings onto everyone else, and why he sees everyone else as suitable tools for enacting his revenge against Grisha.

Because he’s incapable of, and further, unwilling to see or recognizing the thoughts, feelings or desires of anyone outside himself. Because he’s incapable of seeing them as individuals. Because he needs to be able to recognize himself in other people in order to respect them and acknowledge them as legitimate and real.

It’s why Eren is the only person Zeke ever pretends to love and care about, because he sees Eren as an extension of himself, as someone who went through the exact same experiences as him, and so, as the only person capable of understanding and worthy of sharing in his master plan. It’s why, in the end, Eren was able to manipulate Zeke so easily. Because Zeke didn’t see Eren as a real person, or as an individual outside of himself. He couldn’t conceive of Eren having his own thoughts, feelings or desires, because to him, Eren was just an empty vessel for him to project his own thoughts, feelings and desires onto. The same way Zeke did with everyone, in the end.

Again, that comes down to a lack of empathy.

I think all of this demonstrates the fundamental difference between Levi and Zeke, and proves beyond doubt that, though their upbringings and the environments they were raised in definitely had an impact on certain, surface-level qualities in their characters, their most essential, core selves are fully the product of their inherent natures and innate personalities.

Levi overcame the wretched circumstances of his childhood because he always had empathy in his heart. Because he was always innately kind and compassionate.

Zeke was unable to overcome the wretched circumstances of his childhood because he always lacked empathy. Because he was always innately narcissistic and cruel.

#Levi Ackerman #Zeke Yeager #Bad Boy #bad boy spoilers #analysis #commentary #meta

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anlian-aishang · 2 years ago

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SNK Men - Rebounding With You - Eren, Armin, Jean, Levi, Erwin, Reiner, Zeke

// snk x reader, angst turned fluff, allusions to smut, alcohol mention, food mention, hurt-comfort, modern AU, gn!reader. // while writing this, i listened to // read also: Rebounding After You

Eren

A messy bun. Freshly pierced gauges. All black - shoelaces to earrings. Clearly, he had been through something. The look in his emerald eyes warned others to stay away, but you were not like the others, not just another.

His outfit screamed don’t talk to me, but all you could think of was how much nicer he would look without it. Long swigs of his drink demanded his lips, you wondered how he would react if you threw his highball to the floor and put your mouth in its place. His hair was unkempt, tangled, yet you yearned to run your fingers through it. From across the bar, you eyed him up like a tiger would a steak, oblivious to the fact that he could tell you were.

Eren let you have your fun, but flashed you a side-eye and a smirk at just the right time. After a couple seconds of eye contact, you snapped out of your trance and shot your stare straight down. Fuck. Steel soled boots approaching, you knew it could only be one person. Fuck me! And when he cinched your chin between his fingers and drew your gaze to him, he knew it could only be one person. One person to lift him out from the rut he was in. One person who could overpower their taste even more than the alcohol. One person whose scent he not dare wash off his clothes.

He did not have to tell you what he was using you for. It was obvious each time he groaned against your neck, each time he flipped you on your knees and slammed into your furthest depths. After a few weeks, though, you began to question his intentions. More than just a one night stand? The toothbrush he bought you, your phone’s charger on his nightstand, they communicated the sentiment he would never say.

Armin

You had an educated guess. Over the days, his outfits so persistently ironed had grown increasingly wrinkled. In meetings, he was even quieter than usual. Times you expected him to speak up, his lips stayed shut. Topics that would normally enrapture him failed to draw even a sliver of attention. It was so obvious to you, but apparently not to anyone else.

Armin left the space with speed, but without any particular hurry. Not looking to socialize, but not looking for conversation, either. So swift, you could not keep up. When you instinctively reached and grabbed his shoulder, it startled you both, “A-Armin!”

He turned rapidly - not mad, just concerned. You could not remember exactly what you said, for you had wanted to say a lot of things. Out to lunch? Are you free? Come over some time? You’re single, right? Eventually, you stumbled your way to a new book you had been reading, one that made you think of him - no, not that - made you think he might like it. It was awkward, but you got there: a two-person book club, meeting every Friday afternoon.

And soon, he returned to the ironing board. He slicked his comb with gel and shined his shoes back up to standard. There was something - someone - to dress for again. Someone to be excited over. Someone to distract him from the past few miserable months. Someone who taught him how to love again - Friday by Friday.

Books turned to movies. Movies to dinners. Dinners to dates. The things that reminded him of his ex were overrun by reminders of you. As you grew closer, they grew further, until you were all he saw.

Jean

Jean startled when you hugged him, but hours later, he admitted it felt nice. Accidentally brushing against you on the sidewalk, guilt at first, gratitude to follow. When you leaned in, he widened his eyes, then closed them, telling himself just one kiss. Just until he got over it.

Your flirtation was not subtle, but he was happy to indulge. Each text sent and received alleviated some sting. Minutes with you were minutes he was free from his heartache. Every time and everywhere you touched him, you adhered a bandage to a scar left behind. Eventually, he was covered in band-aids, bound to fall off every now and then. He had always heard that one should not talk about an ex to their partner, but he had never been through a break-up like this. You had only been dating for a few weeks, but you could already tell that Jean wore it on his sleeves, he just couldn’t help himself.

When he started to open up, you let him. It was not that you tolerated it, but you yearned to learn all about him, even if it was about his former lover. Sometimes, he choked up when talking about them. Sometimes, he said good things about them. Most others would have told him to get over it, but that thought never came to your mind. Each time he appreciated them, it showed you how attentive he was. When tears fell, you understood how deeply he felt things. Maybe most would have found it scary, but you found the opposite scarier. If he was able to get over them quickly, how quickly could he get over you - god forbid - if the time came? He harbored no ill will towards his ex, not a spiteful bone in his body. Though the relationship had come to an abrupt end, his care was not so easily severed.

He was a good boy, now your boy. You were determined to show him how good you could be, too.

Levi

Relationships were foreign to him. Rebounds, even more so. On his balcony, cup of tea in hand, he overlooked the streets below, sipping and resigned to the fact that this just wasn’t for him. It was exactly what they had said when they left - they just weren’t for him. A deep inhale and slow exhale, chai steam evaporated, they were right, after all.

His friends, coworkers even, watched him go from stoic to saddened, irritable to impossible. For their own sake, they tried to set him up, but that only seemed to aggravate him all the more. He scolded them as he did himself, “Just face it, I already have too many idiots to deal with.”

Months and months dragged on, and everyone was beginning to believe he was damned to be a bachelor - him more than anyone. Not the typical playboy kind, but the kind who ate alone, kept to himself, and whose Friday nights were spent buying groceries and stopping at the local tea shop - their most loyal regular.

Which was why, when he forgot cash at the cash-only establishment, you subtly bagged his purchases and slid the paper bag across the counter. Flat brows to a rare arch, you stole the words out of his mouth, “No. I insist.”

Levi, still cold, attempted to snarl on his way out, but the light bell chime on the door and your warm smile in his wake melted his grunt to a soft sigh. Since that night, he found himself stopping by more often, always the weeknights that you worked. When closing time came around, he lingered and eventually offered to help. While mopping, you caught him swaying to your playlist. As you counted the till, he noticed the upward glances you snuck between bills.

To you, a fairy tale. To him, ridiculous. One fateful night, a torrential rainfall kept you both locked in. Just the two of you. You split stale pastries, invented new drinks, shared secrets, including that midnight kiss. Your lips tasted of matcha and powdered sugar, a taste he believed was right for him.

Erwin

A nice dinner. Too nice. Roses. Candlelight. A table with city views. Not a fold out of place, not a falter in his movements. Erwin spoke so politely, you wondered if he had rehearsed, or were you dreaming? The six-figure salaryman, you knew he would be professional, but this was suspiciously perfect. He acted as though there was a deal to be closed, an asset he desperately needed, one only you could provide.

You had no power over him, at least, not inherently. Tall, dark, handsome, what did he have to be afraid of? What could have gotten to him? Subtly, while he ate, you examined the man opposite you. Hair perfectly slickened. Tie fastened just right. Smartphone tucked neatly in his breastpocket. Funny, how it had not gone off the whole meal.

Wait. Wasn’t he a businessman? Where was his watch? Of all men to wear a watch, Erwin Smith should have been at the top of that list. An odd discomfort nicked you: seeing a dog without a collar, a fence with some knots undone. His keys. Two copies of the same keys? Seriously, who needs two mail keys? On the same ring, nonetheless.

He could sense it, your realization. He figured you would catch on eventually, that was why he picked you in the first place - a good head on your shoulders, one to catch his tells. A relationship freshly severed. You were the rebound. Your lips parted at the thought, but slowly grew content, a thankful smirk even. Whoever fucked up before you was to thank - having landed you a date with the sector’s wealthiest figure - on his best behavior.

It was then that you knew what you were and what you had. For him: a way to forget failed ventures. For you: a man of dreams wrapped around your finger.

Reiner

In his presence, your intentions were pure. A friend to him, that was what you were. A shoulder to cry on. Always available whenever he needed a night out, always picking up the phone and listening to his slurred words. A smile and a laugh the morning after. Wholesome you always pulled through.

At night, alone in bed, you could not tether your mind from its dirtier ideas. You wanted to slap away his stupid thoughts. Don’t you know they didn’t love you? They didn’t deserve you. Hell, you don’t deserve them! When you first kissed him, your tongue would wipe away their leftover taste. Before he could even begin a fresh start, your flavor would be down his throat.

You had been good friends since college, able to read each other effortlessly. Knowing he was finally single, though, made you blind to the fact that he suffered the same inner battle. Reiner had an appreciation for your platonic care, you had always made him laugh the most - far more than they ever did - no matter how down he was feeling. The teasing ruffle of his hair he needed. The punch on the arm. You provided it all, he loved it all.

After a few weeks, though, that was not what he craved. Your friendship had brought him back from the brink, but now, he wanted to feel high again. In daylight, you told him that he deserved to feel happy. At night, he heard you whisper that he deserved to feel good. Both of you were so opposite in sunlight and in moonlight, but thank god for twilight. Lunches together bled into evenings, and when you witnessed the other sides of each other, you both recognized that there was more to your days than friendship.

Zeke

Zeke got you with all the right things, all the words and actions that were textbook for starting a relationship. You had to admit, his skills were formidable, but he was no match for you - the first to see through his tactics.

You let him have his fun. The hard and fast kiss, the overnight, the seemingly mindless text exchanges. You knew you were more, though. You knew you were convincing him of it. You could tell he was learning. Kissing you, he felt compelled to take his time, to take breaths between, to decorate the spaces with words from the heart rather than a guidebook. Nights together no longer had one objective, but were eaten up by movies, take-out, and long talks. Texts became phone calls. Phone calls became face to face meetings, then dinners, then rooftop conversations.

Eventually, Zeke admitted that there had been someone not long before you. You put your arm around his back, nodded, and bit your lip - having figured that out from the start. He came clean with his intentions, that he did not go looking for someone to settle down with, but someone to help him get over them. Looking to you, uncharacteristic panic in his gaze, he said that he found both in you.

He expected you to leave him then, just as suddenly as they had, but unlike all the others - you managed to toss his surprises back at him. This time, you were the one to push your lips hastily to his. Shocked but swiftly, he wrapped his arms around you. His cheeks turned red, his hands began to shake, never had he felt this way about anyone before. In that way, you were his first. He prayed that breakup would be his last.

// masterlist //

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darkestescapes · 2 years ago

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Warnings: Yan! Character x Yan! Innocent! Reader. Fem reader. Big Boy! Character x Small! Reader. Smut. They're both so in love with each other. Somnophilia. Just a lot of sex. Creampie. Originally written while keeping Reiner and Zeke in mind 🤤

Yan! Innocent!Y/N never complains when he manhandles her to his liking. It doesn't help that she's also so much shorter than him. When they hug her feet aren't even close to the ground, and he always has a view of her perfect little butt to knead like his very own stress ball. She doesn't even complain when he wants her to wear just his shirt and greet her. Little does she know that her boobs are clearly visible in that shirt.

He's so obsessed with the way she's so cute and small compared to him. It makes him want to protect her, want to kiss her everywhere, want to fuck her perfect little pussy full of his cum, want to see how his cum flows out of her hole, want to hear her cute moans and whines when she's close, want to hear how she screams when it's too much for her little body to take.

It is obvious they both enjoyed it when he fucked her against the wall and then in the air, bouncing her cute little self on his cock which made her a blabbering mess who kept drooling onto her tits. She also loved it when he fucked his cock into her spasming hole from behind, thoroughly enjoying how the veins on his dick felt and how her hands were helplessly locked behind her back; she still remembers how her nipples ached from how much he was sucking on to them while cuddling after sex like as though her tits are the last water cans left on this planet and he's the thirstiest man alive.

If you ask her what her favourite time to have sex is, she'll tell that it's the mornings. In the morning, she wakes up to either his fingers or tongue or cock fucking her sore hole so good that when she cums, she can't help but go back to sleep. If you ask him the same question, he'll say he likes to fuck her all the time. He can't help himself, his girl is too cute and so desperate to be fucked and who else can fuck her better than him and only him. He thinks of it as his duty as her lover to make her cum at least twice a day, if not more given time. He loves to watch her come undone due to him, loves how she lets out this particular high pitched squeal and how her tongue slightly peeks out of her mouth when she cums and added to that is this dazed look in her eyes that he thinks are her siren eyes because he wants to see them again and again.

#yandere aot #yandere #yandere reader #male yandere #yandere male x yandere female #yandere male x reader #yandere reiner #yandere zeke #aot smut #reiner smut #zeke smut #attack on titan #jujutsu kaisen toji #toji smut #toji fushiguro

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warm-starlight · 1 year ago

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I just saw that post you shared from TW and I wanted to get some things off my chest.

There’s no need to write a pathetic piece desperately trying to downplay Hanji’s impact to Levi. Erwin and Hanji are both important to him. THATS FUCKING CANON! I’m so tired reading the same “Levi encouraged Erwin to use Hanjis squad as a bait to save his life. Therefore Levi doesn’t give a shit about Hanji and is in love with Erwin.” ERWIN IS THEIR COMMANDER AND HIS SAFETY IS A PRIORITY! That's literally how the military chain of command is preserved! Hanji would’ve done the same thing in Levi’s place without a doubt. ”Levi still mentions Erwin even though he is dead for four years.” DUUUUHHH?!Of course he still thinks about him and his promise to him! All the scouts along with Erwin died to give him the opportunity to kill zeke and he fucking failed! Of course he is eager to finish the job! And for the love of god stop using the “I’m championing for LGBT ships and you are dismissing roori becase they are gay.” Girl,roori is the least dismissed ship out there. They are literally one of the biggest army of shippers out there and theres no shortage of people defending them all the time. Also, levihan isn’t a even a straight ship?! Did they miss the whole thing where Isayama changed Hanjis pronouns in the manga?I also hate how whoever wrote this feels like their personal interpretation is the only thing that matters and ours is wrong and invalid. All that shit they are presenting about Levi and Erwin should be interpreted as romantic but those between Levi and Hange no matter how emotional and intimate should not?Grow up!If levihan bothers you so much block and mute people.Do what you gotta do to keep away from the content you dont want to see!Let people enjoy hamless shit.

I have a lot to say about every paragraph of that post, but i honestly don't care for wasting my time on someone who chooses to read the manga with their eyes closed.

Remember when that central MP told Levi that Erwin is captured and will be hanged and offered to let him go if he just gives himself in? Levi said "no", even though he should want to protect Erwin's life no matter what according to them, right? Instead Levi said "Some lives are more valuable than the others.". At that moment he prioritized the lives of Eren and Historia over Erwin.

Also "he never thought about Hange" after they died is hilariously incorrect. He told Hange to "keep watching". He followed their theory that killing Zeke might sever Eren's connection to the paths and stop the rumbling. He also used the knowledge he got from them to quickly asses that the Ackermans and shifters are immune to the titan gas and lead everyone to kill Eren.

He literally thought about them as he was having his internal monologue. They were at the front of his mind so to speak and the only active character in the panels, while everyone else was a passive listener.

He saw them among every other survey corps member when he gave them his final salute.

Years later he saw a plane fly by that reminded him of the day he lost them and erooris clowning about that panel saying "HaNgE iS A PLaNe" are just completely braindead and don't understand literary symbolism.

There are too many scenes that showed Levi cares deeply about Hange and the fact he prioritized **the freaking commander of the survey corps** at some point does not negate that he has almost been hit by Zeke's rocks worrying about their safety and that he stopped in the middle of an intense battle to make Armin protect them when they got injured.

In the forest afrer finding out what happened to Zeke (because Zeke was the last thing he remembers before the explosion??) he immediately brought the conversation to Hange's expressed feelings and gave them much needed encouragement.

Anyway. Erooris clearly are seething because all they have is the promise which, although was made to Erwin,was really about All the dead survey corps members. The moment between them was nowhere near on the level of intimacy and vulnerability that 126 and 132 had. They are clearly green with envy.

When the shippes choose to talk shit about "a rival ship" rather than talking about their own content this is how you know they have no leg to stand on.

Yes, Levi cared about Erwin deeply, yes, his loyalty to him was amazing, but he has done things to Hange he has done to nobody else and Hange was the only person who witnessed him at his most vulnerable and soft and all of it was meant for them alone.

#snk #aot #levihan #ship wars #anonymous

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lostcauses-noregrets · 2 years ago

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Hi, Lost. I recently saw a discussion about Ackermans and how Levi never mentioned to Mikasa the possibility of them being distantly relative. And it suggests that Levi doesn't actually reveal that he's an Ackerman to the others, at least, not to a lot of people. I always assumed Levi and Mikasa at least discussed this off-scene but anyway, we all know Levi definitely talked to Erwin about it. Knowing Erwin's curiosity and personality, there is no way he wasn't obsessed with the idea of a clan of, basically, titan slayers. He loves a good mystery and they would be too important for Survey Corps and Paradis in general. It's weird that this Ackerman thing was never explored other than "yeah Levi and Mikasa are OP don't question it" because I don't know about you but I would be so interested in freaking super soldiers living amongst us and I believe so was Erwin. We were robbed of that conversation, it'd give us so much Eruri material I believe :(

Hi Anon, sorry it’s taken me so long to answer your ask. You're definitely not the only one to be frustrated with the lack of information and resolution about the Ackermans. People waited years for Levi and Mikasa to have “the Ackertalk”, but when it finally came in chapter 63 it left everyone pretty disappointed. It did happen though, and Levi does suggest to Mikasa that they may be related.

There was a glimmer of hope that more would be revealed when the Ackermans were referred to as a “subproduct of Titan science” in chapter 93. That really set the cat amongst the pigeons, but again, we got no further explanation about what that actually meant, either in the manga or in any of the supplementary materials. The only subsequent information we got about the Ackermans were Eren’s lies to Mikasa in chapter 112, where he claimed that Ackermans were slaves to their host, and Zeke revealing in chapter 130 that there’s nothing magical about the so-called Ackerbond, it’s just love.

A lot of the additional information we have about the Ackermans comes from interviews with Isayama in the supplementary guidebooks, and it’s confusing at best and contradictory at worst. For example, in chapter 65 Grandpa Ackerman tells Kenny that the king’s power to alter memories does not work on the Ackermans, and that this is one of the reasons they were feared and persecuted by the crown. However, later in the manga Eren was clearly able to alter Mikasa's memories, so that doesn’t add up. It's almost like Isayama was just making it up as he went along!

The lack of resolution around the Ackermans is just one of a number of threads that Isayama never tied up, which includes HIstoria’s arc and Mikasa’s relationship to the Azumabito clan. It’s frustrating, because the Ackerman lore had so much potential, but none of it was ever developed, and at the end of the day they were a bit of a McGuffin. (Levi McGuffin doesn’t quite have the same ring to it though 😂) Having said that, I can understand why Isayama shelved the Ackerman backstory, because it wasn’t really central to the plot. Also Levi, Mikasa and Kenny didn’t need any additional lore to make them really compelling and popular characters.

If you're interested, I've got a post collating all the canon information about the Ackermans from the manga and the guidebooks: Ackermans Master Post.

With regards to how much Erwin knew about the Ackermans, there’s nothing in the manga, but I agree that once he discovered the connection between Levi and Kenny he would definitely have made it his business to find out more. I wrote a tiny ficlet once about Erwin learning Levi’s name, it’s called Everything and Nothing

The words have been rattling around inside Erwin’s skull for days. Clattering against each other, discordant, disconcerting.

When they finally pass his lips one is familiar on his tongue, familiar as his own breath, the other foreign, sharp and bitter in his mouth.

“Levi.”

Levi’s head turns towards him on the pillow.

“What?”

“Ackerman.”

“Don’t.”

He turns away again.

“I always wondered…”

“I didn’t know.”

Erwin runs one finger lightly over Levi’s shoulder.

“I know, but it makes sense somehow.”

“Don’t.”

Levi is silent for a moment.

“It doesn’t change who I am. It doesn’t change anything.”

Erwin looks down at the black hair feathering over the pillow beside him. The pulse flickering in his neck; blue blood below porcelain white skin.

Ackerman.

Erwin leans down and presses his lips to Levi’s throat, to the pulse.

“Levi,” he says again.

It changes everything. And nothing.

#asks #ackermans #ackerbond #erwin smith #levi ackerman #eruri #mikasa ackerman #eren yeager #zeke yeager #snk

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the-boy-who-sought-freedomm · 7 months ago

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Yeah, you're right about Eren and Ymir motivations being unclear, and there was so much that could be explored

I tend to incline more to the interpretation of "Eren is doing it bc he wants to (maybe as a way to gain control over his situation and bc he just hates the people outside that much), but he is not 100% committed of doing so (becoming the devil/bad guy) if is not for a noble/good cause, so he is using his love for his friends/country as a justification for his actions"

Not the best interpretation, but in general, I do think Eren wants to do the rumbling, which is apparently an unpopular opinion. Even though Eren himself admitted it, I mean he has his Walter White moment lol

Also, all this could be explored in between the time skip, maybe if Liberio was told as a flashforward or something idk

On Ymir's, exactly, it has more sense if both of them want to destroy the world out of their hatred towards humanity

It also works better in contrast to Armin and Zeke conversation in paths and Carla's "he is special for being born in this world" talk

But if we still go with the KF thing, I'm not a fan of focusing on "Mikasa show Ymir what true love is" like no, I don't think that should be the important part, the contrast on beliefs, let people go, putting boundaries an sticking with your morals are topics that still can be explored there

Sorry for the rant and bad spelling, english is not my first language and I'm kind of afraid to interact with the fandom 😅

Don't worry about your english, it's good! And I feel you on being afraid to interact with the fandom, it can be... intense lol

I was actually very happy to find this ask in my inbox! Finally someone who wants to discuss these plot points.

I like your interpretation, and I think it could have worked, but I feel like in the way it was shown in the manga, it just feels like isayama couldn't decide which motivation to go with, and he kept changing it as he wrote the story. I don't think it's an unpopular opinion that Eren wants to do the rumbling, I think the majority of the fandom does. I would have agreed, if his motivations for it were stronger, even if it was simply "I just want to do it lol" I would have accepted it, but like I said he wasn't 100% committed to it because Isayama wasn't 100% committed to it. I think narration is like a puppet show, you're not supposed to see the hands moving the puppets, but I clearly saw Isayama's in this one.

About Ymir, I think the whole "love" thing, although a bit lame, COULD have worked, if Isayama took the time to develop it. Abusive relationship are a lot complicated and layered, you can't just draw one lame ass panel of Eren saying "she was in love with king fritz" and then that infamous phrase "only Ymir knows". I know Isayama was tired of working on the story but since he didn't have time to develop this point properly, he should have gone with something else.

Glad we agreed it had more sense if she wanted to destroy the world as well, and seeing all she ever saw of humanity was cruelty, she had every right to. I guess to stop the rumbling, showing her the "beauty of the world" could have worked, but I don't see how Mikasa kissing a decapitated head could be considered the "beauty of the world", that girl had just gone insane because her lover had to die, that's tragic not romantic.

Anyway I hope I made sense, that's all I wanted to say I think, and thank you so, so much for the ask! Feel free to drop by my askbox again! ❤️

#snk #eren yeager #ymir aot #ymir fritz #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #aot #armin arlert #zeke yeager

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etherealnoir · 1 year ago

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Thoughts on Dhan Rana (S1 E5)

One thing I LOVE about Found is that everybody starts out as kind of a broad archetype of a character, and each one has been slowly getting deconstructed with each episode. We also learn more and more about relationship dynamics with each episode. We're only on episode 5 and we've already learned so much.

TL;DR: Dhan is a wonderful character who kind of surprised me. I didn't expect to love him as much as I do. I like that Gabi and Margaret are super protective of him, and in turn, he's fiercely protective of them. I'm excited to see his character grow. I also don't really like his relationship with his husband from the little bit we've seen. It's just not sitting right with me.

More detailed thoughts below the cut.

In THIS episode we learned that baby boy CANNOT be alone. He doesn't do well. It's connected to his trauma from being held captive for 3 years. Which is such a long fucking time and I think the longest kidnapping situation we've seen from the group thus far (I don't think we don't know how long Zeke was gone, yet...please correct me if we do).

In a passing conversation around episode one or two, his husband was revealed to be a therapist (whether his husband was HIS therapist or just so happened to be a therapist is unclear, but I still have my reservations). His husband mentioned that Dhan should give Zeke grace, because Dhan was in a similar position to Zeke not too long ago. He also added that they "worked on it" together. Again, idk if his husband was HIS therapist, or if he meant they worked on it as a couple.

We've only seen Dhan's husband once, and Dhan speaks fondly of him on the rare occasion that he's mentioned. But...I think the one thing that kind of stuck out to me is how much he can't quite function without his husband in the house. Like at all. He can't sleep, he doesn't groom himself, he doesn't dress himself (not really). It took all of one day (presumably) for Dhan to unravel in his husband's absence. The team also pointed out that this happens OFTEN every time his husband leaves. If Dhan's husband is a therapist, it's just odd to me that there were no safeguards in place when there's probably a strong understanding that being alone is triggering for him. It gives me this vibe that Dhan's recovery is wholly reliant on codependency with his husband. It also proves that though Dhan may have worked on his recovery with his husband...I don't think he worked on it alone. Which is SUPER important.

I'm gonna put my shipper goggles away for like 5 seconds but I feel like Dhan is beginning to learn a lot from Zeke. More than he realized he would. On some level, I think he's beginning to understand that even though he's not necessarily in the same place he was before, mentally and emotionally, he still has a LOT of work to do. And I like that he and Zeke have found companionship over it, because they're both on different paths of recovery but still fully understand what the other person is going through.

Another thing that stuck out to me is how protective Gabi is of Dhan. I've said it before, but Dhan is clearly her ride of die. I still have the belief that he knows Hugh is in that basement. But it became even more obvious when she rushed to hug Dhan and check his injuries after the fight with Manny in the kitchen where he was almost shot. Both Margaret and Gabi seem super protective of Dhan. It makes me wonder what he was like when they first met him.

Anyway Dhan is a wonderfully written character. I like that it didn't take 3 seasons for us to finally see the sarcastic, cool guy character show GENUINE FEAR, anxiety, and vulnerability.

#found nbc #dhan rana #found tv show

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blaxcunicorn · 1 year ago

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Diaboli's Angelus

Chapter: 6

Length: 4.7k

Authors note: Heeey it's me again, the chapter turned out short than what I anticipated but hope you like it.

Chapter: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Tag: @okaystopwhore

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“Have you seen my wife?” He asks the two guards. their eyes widen as they haven´t seen you around today. They look stupidly at each other praying that the other soldier had seen you. Eren closes his eyes to control his famous anger “You better find me, my wife.” He says between his teeth, by the time he opens his eyes they had run off to search for you. He walks quickly praying that you’ll be sitting on the couch drifting away in one of his mother's old books. Unfortunately to him was your library spotless, no sight of you ever visiting it today.

He slams the door and is rushing over to your Chamber. Miksasa is holding a laundry basket looking confused at Eren. Why is he so distressed? “Mikasa, have you seen my wife?” The words my wife stings her heart. “No? I have been cleaning the library the whole day. Maybe she is in the garden I’ll check.” The raven-haired girl drops the basket and picks up her dress jogging towards the garden. Eren tries to breath in to calm his anxiety, his fingers are shaking. What if something happened to you? He tries to shake off the thought. “Thank you! Also, alert Levi!” he shouts and is responded to by her turning her head and nodding.

Eren turns around to see if he can at least find Reiner, he must know about his wife’s whereabouts. On his way to the knights' chamber, he sees a smirking Zeke standing nonchalantly next to the window. He is holding his cigarette leaning his back on the wall. Eren knows that Zeke played a part in your disappearance, he knows his brother far too well. “If something has happened to her…” Eren says between his teeth. It took him a lot of mental strength not to punch him in the face. Zeke puffs out the cigarette smoke “Relax brother, why would I hurt my dear sister-in-law?” Eren feels his heart pound into millions of beats per second, the rage that was growing is cut by Mikasa. “We found her! She is at the main door,” she shouts rushing to Eren’s side. “Was she in the garden?” Eren asks as it was the most logical place for you to be. “No, I couldn´t find her anywhere” Mikasa says leading the way to the door. Eren sees you walk in with Reiner beside you, he tries to read your body language and you look like a thief caught stealing.

The Royal guards are surrounding the two of you which stresses you out, so you hide behind Reiner as instinct to hide from the attention. You feel your underarms sweat and you close your eyes to try and control your anxiety as you just realised that you were not breathing properly the second you entered the door. You thought that Eren was going to be away for at least a night or two. Seeing your husband standing there is like standing in front of a ghost. Relief replaces Eren’s anxiety but the anger, oh boy that one has not disappeared. He scans through your body to see if you have any injuries but spots the bag of sweets in your hand and dirt on your white shoes. He closes his eyes and chews his inner cheek praying that his theory is false“Did you guys go outside the palace, Reiner?” The knight stiff at the angry voice of his King. He looks down trying to come up with an explanation. He knows far too well that lying to Eren is suicidal. You can feel Reiner’s body shaking a bit so you try to step in Reiner’s defence as it was you who dragged him into your mess. “N-no, we-” your poor attempt to defend him was shut down immediately. “I was asking Reiner, my love” his stare was cold and dull, and his vibrant green eyes were unrecognisable. You take a step back, looking down “S-sorry” you stutter. “W-we went to Stochess for a trip” Reiner responds almost whispering the last part.

Rage possesses Eren “You took her outside the palace after I clearly instructed you not to exit the walls!” Eren’s knuckles turned white as it took every strength in his body not to kill the knight. You standing there is the only reason there aren’t any blood stains on the floor. He turns around “While I was out settling diplomatic issues for the nation, for your families to live in peace! You couldn’t repay your King by watching over my only breathing family member! It will be a head per scratch on her body!” You could see the veins in his neck pop out. You are taken back as you didn’t know that your husband could be so…cruel. Your eyes are itching as tears are building up, how can you possibly solve this?

Armin comes running after hearing what happened from Sasha. Knowing his best friend, it’s not going to end well. He tries to walk past all the soldiers gathered around you without any luck. Mikasa is standing there in shock, she has seen him angry but not this outraged. Her eyes land on you, the sight broke her heart as you are clearly scared of your husband and tearing up. “Eren-” She is stopped by Zeke whispering in her ear, which sends chills down her spine “Just because you were his whore, doesn’t it mean that you can influence him like that.” Mikasa’s eyes widen as she turns around to face the blond Lord. “Excuse me, Lord Zeke, why would you say such a thing?” Zeke snorts “Come on, Ackerman. You were trying to convince him not to react to the fact that his wife went missing. You should stay out of it as it is a family matter.” It took Mikasa a lot of strength not to slap the man “Lord Zeke, I’m in fact, family.” The Lord leans over her ear and whispers “Why? Because of the secret you are carrying? I wonder how your Queen would take it if she found out? If you know what’s best for you, you’ll stay out of this.” Mikasa looks down in defeat while Zeke nods at his wife Lady Pieck Finger.

You in the meantime are stressed out at your husband’s rage. Tears are running down your eyes to the point where you can’t even see either him or the people standing around you. It felt like Eren’s mask melted and the kind and caring husband was gone and underneath you found…must be the “Devil” everyone is talking about. However, you have to try and suck and defend Reiner who is getting mentally torn to pieces by your husband. “M-my apologies for the trouble caused” The knight finally says. “You are sorry?” Eren snorts, your eyes widen in shock it seems like he is almost mocking Reiner. He then continues “You took her outside Reiner! Do you not understand the gravity of the situation? The risks involved? You have jeopardized her safety! This is treachery, I should take your head out and send it back to your poor mother.” That was it, you had to say something he is taking it too far. “S-stop Eren, please!” You walk to stand in front of Reiner in a poor attempt to shield the built man. “I-it was my idea to leave the palace. Reiner tried to stop me but I forced him to come along with me!” You sob “Please don’t punish him, if anything I should be the one losing a head.” You almost whisper the last part.

Eren was about to say something before getting cut by Pieck who is nonchalantly walking past the soldiers to stand next to you. “My Majesty, I understand that this situation is frustrating you” You look down, as you thought that it couldn’t be more embarrassing than it already is. However, you are met with Pieck’s warm and comforting smile which calms you down. “However, it´s not something you solve in public. As a married couple and as her husband are you supposed to resolve your issues in private. Think about your wife's honour.” She looks over at you and Eren´s cold gaze softens as he realises how his rage must have terrified you. Your beautiful brown eyes were filled with tears and anxiety. He hates to admit it but Pieck is right. Eren breathes in deeply “Y/n I wish to see you in my chamber after sunset.” You stare at him with a confused face, firstly he has never invited you to his chamber, you always did the “deed” at yours. Secondly, speaking of deed how can he demand intimacy from you after all this? You are confused but respond with a simple “Yes” and curtsy before he marches away. The soldiers start to leave as the chaos is dying down which leaves you alone with Reiner, Pieck, Mikasa and Armin.

“Reiner, I'm so sorry. I never meant for this to happen, I really thought that w-we…” Tears are running down again. “Don’t worry about it, I believe that his Highness knew that it was bound to happen. He couldn’t keep you caged forever, I kind of knew that the day would come when you’ll ask me to help you sneak out. However, I didn’t know it would be this soon” Reiner laughs it off to lighten your mood, you give him a hug as an apology and which causes him to blush“Y-your Majesty”. “Thank you Reiner” you respond while sniffing. “Here” you receive a tissue from Pieck to dry your tears. “I haven’t properly introduced myself. I’m Lady Pieck Jeager, Zeke´s wife”. The raven-haired woman curtsy. Does Zeke have a wife? She is gorgeous you think to yourself, she seems like a woman with grace. “Thank you for everything, Lady Pieck. I’m truly grateful for the help and I’m also deeply sorry for the disturbance of your peace.” Armin and Mikasa look at each other thinking the same thing, this will lead to no good. “Your Majesty, King Eren wanted you in his chamber, perhaps we should get you ready for that.” You both turn to Mikasa “Yes, of course, thank you, Mikasa.” You give her a small smile while Pieck stared at her with a cold gaze. “Before you leave, I would love to arrange a date for us to drink tea” Pieck says smiling. This time Armin is the one to speak “Lady Pieck, that is an excellent idea. Your Majesty if that’s alright may perhaps my fiance Lady Annie join in. This is a perfect opportunity for you to get to know the Ladies of Eldia, you can even invite Lady Ymir.” He looks nervous at you but relaxes when he is met with your warm smile “That’s an excellent idea, Lord Armin, I will send out invitations.” Mikasa grabs your arm “I can help you with those” she says while leading you to your chamber.

Armin waits until you are out of sight “I don't know what you and Lord Zeke are planning but it’s not going to work. I'm not letting you two poison her mind” He warns Lady Finger. “We are not the enemies here Armin, we just want what’s best for Eldia and its future. He is unfit to be King, his aggressive foreign policies are going to be our downfall.” Armin’s blood is boiling “Unfit? So you want your bastard husband to be the one on the throne. Careful now Lady Pieck, before I advise the King to strip the Finger family of your royal titles.” Pieck doesn't respond other than “You should be careful too, you don't want to upset your future Queen” before walking away. Armin takes a deep breath knowing that he has to come up with a plan to prevent Zeke and Pieck to grow too close to you.

Mikasa on the other hand is getting you ready for your visit. “I-I’ve never seen him this angry” you whisper while she touches up on your makeup. “Your Majesty, I know you might be shocked. Ere- I mean His Majesty got his reasons. He has always had a bad temper…” Mikasa sighs at her ex-lover's behaviour “However, he should not have behaved like that.” She says raising her voice a little. “I know, but I didn’t know that he could be so…cruel.” You respond low as your eyes are starting to sting again. You grab the letter Ciara and Catherine wrote to you and used it as a fan to dry your glassy eyes. Mikasa takes one hand on your knees “Don’t you worry, I believe that he has a soft spot for you. Just stand up for yourself and explain the situation. I’m pretty sure that he’ll understand.” She says trying to be optimistic for you.

Your heart pounds with a mixture of anticipation and anxiety as you walk towards the King's chamber. You have never been inside before, and the unfamiliarity of it all adds to your nervousness. The hallway leading to the chamber seems longer than usual, each step echoing in your mind. Your thoughts are disrupted “I’ll leave you here as I’m not allowed to walk into his chamber without his permission” Mikasa curtsies. “Thank you” You curtsy back and smile. “Again, if you need anything I’ll be in my room.” You respond with a warm smile, having Mikasa as your main lady is amazing as she is the person besides Darcy that you can trust with your life.

As you enter the chamber, your eyes widen. Eren's chamber is expansive, adorned with intricate tapestries, ornate furniture, and gilded decorations. The soft glow of the flickering candles casts dancing shadows on the walls, creating an atmosphere of both warmth and grandiosity. Your gaze falls upon the King, who sits on one of the two plush chairs positioned near a crackling firepit. He remains silent, his face partially illuminated by the gentle light of the flames. There is an air of solemnity about him as if he is deeply absorbed in his thoughts. You hesitate for a moment, your eyes looking around the room, taking in the immense space and the weight of your current situation. With a small gesture, Eren invites you to take a seat in the chair next to his, a silent indication for you to join him.

Your heart flutters nervously as you walk towards the chair. The soft fabric feels cool against your trembling fingers as you carefully lower herself onto the cushioned seat. You steal a quick glance at the King, hoping to get a small clue about his emotions, but his expression remains unreadable. On the seat arm, you spot a bouquet of daffodils, and you pick it up “They are beautiful” you say low “I picked them for you, on my way back from Shiganshina” Eren responds shortly looking straight into your soul. The room feels vast and overwhelming, yet there is an undeniable intimacy in the way you are positioned, the crackling fire creating a cosy ambience. Your mind races with thoughts, unsure of what to say or how to address the tension between you. Do you apologize? No, he had no right to trap you in the palace without a good enough reason. However, you can’t help but feel a bit guilty.

The silence stretches on, punctuated only by the crackling of the fire and the sound of their breathing. You find yourself fidgeting with your hands, your mind clouded with worry. You wonder what’s waiting for you, whether is he going to shout again? and if your relationship can weather this storm. As you steal another glance at Eren, you notice a flicker of vulnerability in his eyes and a slight tension in his jaw. It is a subtle indication that he is wrestling with his own emotions and uncertainties.

Eren is the first to cut the silence “I want to first apologise for my behaviour, I shouldn’t have lost my temper like that”. You were taken a bit back as you were expecting him to be more aggressive. on one hand, really wanted to forgive him, but you still needed to get some stuff out of your chest “I forgive you, however, that behaviour was uncalled for Eren!” Now Eren is the one taken back, firstly how dare you raise your voice at your King? No one has ever raised their voice at him since…his mother. “I wouldn’t have lost my mind if you just listened to me! It’s dangerous out there!” You are slowly losing your cool and Eren is about to get a sample of your wrath “I wouldn't have gone out there if you told me what is going on!” Eren stands up from the chair and you quickly copy him. “Maybe I would have trusted you with it if you listened!” You move closer to him, and his eyes are filled with anger however at this point you yourself are filled with rage that might get you beheaded for regicide “ If I listened?” you say with a mocking tone “Y/n!” Eren warns as he moves closer and is now starring you down. You look up and try not to feel intimidated by him “So, this is what you think of me? Some stupid breeding cow that doesn’t have a mind of her own?” Eren’s look softens a tiny bit “No, that’s not what I think of you, you are my wife!” You cut him off “That’s exactly what you think of me! I might be your wife by the law but I don’t know if I am in your heart” You whisper the last part. “A husband is honest with his wife! You on the other hand locked me away from the outside world without a single explanation of why. I feel like a bird in a cage, a bird with no freedom.” Eren look completely softens as guilt is starting to eat him from the inside. He was busy trying to protect you from any harm that he didn’t realise that he was the one causing you harm and, more importantly, breaking the vow he made to you in your wedding. My requests are honesty and love in this marriage he hears you echo in his head.

His thought process is cut “Eren, what am I to you?” He is taken back. He looks you in the eyes which causes his heart to twist, as tears are running down your beautiful skin. Your body is shaking He is stunned, he doesn’t know how to respond but he knows what he wants to do. All he can think about is his wanting to destroy whatever made you cry even knowing well that he is the one causing you this heartache. “What am I to you?! I need to know now! I moved away from home for you! I am giving you my youth, my life, my devotion! While you can’t even give me a simple answer!” You cry. His silence scares you, what if it was true? Maybe you were just some tool to continue the Jeager bloodline, maybe he just saw you as something that low. However, you are stunned by his next action, his strong arms encircle you, enveloping you in a sense of security and familiarity. You feel the warmth of his body against yours, the steady beat of his heart echoing in your ear. Slowly, your muscles relax, You can feel the tension melting away, replaced by a bittersweet mixture of relief and vulnerability. “You are no breeding cow Y/n. I cannot put into words how happy you have made me in the short timespan we’ve been together. You are the spring sun to my dark winter days, when I see you my dark world light up. You are my light, my anchor and my pride. I see myself falling for you deeper and deeper every single day. I might be crazy but I believe, no I know that I love you. Everything I’m doing now is trying to protect you and our potential future child.” You are left speechless and the sound of your sniffing is filling the room as you try your hardest not to cry. Eren loves you! You feel like the luckiest woman in the world “I-I love you too and I understand, but you need to communicate with me. Tell me the truth Eren, why don’t you allow me outside the palace?” Eren grabs your hand while sitting down on the soft brown bear carpet on the floor in front of the crackling firepit. You follow him and sit down with him. Eren holds your hand looking you in the eyes “It started four years ago”

Fifteen-year-old Eren got dressed for the family’s Jaeger’s annual family day. He was excited to join his parents on the royal boat around the Kingdom, starting from Stochess and ending at Shiganshina. It started with only his father and mother to show the kingdom their presence and gratitude towards the hardworking Eldian people. “Thank you,” he says to the elder maid that finalized his military medals which he was proud to showcase to the people of Eldia. The young boy storms off once the maid finishes to greet his mother. He runs out to the Queen's garden where he sees his mother her flowing black hair cascading down her back, captures his attention. It shines like a raven's feathers, contrasting beautifully against her tan skin. But what truly captivates him are her golden eyes, glowing with a gentle radiance that reflects her inner kindness and wisdom. He runs over to her while she is deeply focused on reading her favourite love poetries. Eren sneaks onto her and tries to scare her but she giggles. “I believe your father is waiting for us near the boat,” She says getting up and the two of them start walking towards the boat. Carla stops for a brief second “Eren, honey” Eren is staring confused at his mother “Yes?” Carla turns to her son “You look a bit pale, have you eaten breakfast?” Eren only responds with a couple of nods. “Are you sure? Your ears are turning red” The Queen grabs his left ear which causes annoyance and embarrassment for the young Prince. Carla on the other hand shakes her head at her son's silliness “We can have brunch in the garden after the trip and you can tell me about your adventures with the Scouts” A wide grin is painted on his face as he and his mother lock pinky fingers as a promise. The two of them reach the boat where his father is seated with Kenny the current head of the Ackerman clan and the Uncle of Levi and Mikasa. Kenny reaches out a hand to help the Queen get on the boat while Eren jumps on it excitedly. “Careful, son” The King smiles. Eren looked up to his father, he was the king Eren aspired to be one day, strong, selfless and loved by everyone around him. Eren smiles with excitement as they set off, he sat next to his mother while his father was seated in front of them with Kenny helping navigate the boat at the back.

The people are waving and throwing flowers at the royal family. The leaders of the communities would hand Kenny over letters with the demands and issues of the communities he then would give to the King. Everything seemed fine until Kenny stands up and holds his two guns. Eren’s eyes widen in shock “What’s wrong Kenny?” Knowing about the Ackermans and their instincts Eren understood that something must be wrong. In a flash of light, he sees blood on the side of his shirt, his mother has been struck by three arrows on the stomach. “Mom!” He shouts ripping the arrows out of her in panic. He then rips the fabric of his pants trying to stop the bleeding. Screaming and chaos emerged among the people while the Garrison guards are assembling to try and find the assassin. “Throw us come shields” Kenny shouts while trying to help Eren stop Carla´s bleeding. “C-Carla” Grisha says in shock before another arrow comes and hits the King on the throat. Kenny´s eyes widen in shock as the King is choking on his own blood and his vibrant green eyes turn dull. “Shit, how haven’t the Garrsson found the assassins yet? Kenny turns to the King to feel his pulse. Horror was written all over Eren’s face “Please be alive, please be alive” he prays. However, Kenny’s facial expression said something else. Tears are streaming down Eren’s face as he realised that his father is gone. “Kenny…Kenny” Both men turn their heads to the Queen’s whispers. “Please take Eren and run.” Eren’s face is in disbelief his mother could not really think that he would ever abandon her. “No, we are not going without you. We made a promise to get back home together and have brunch remember! I’m going nowhere without you!” Eren shouts “Your majesty, you know the royal protocols, we cannot leave the boat without confirmation from the Garrisons that it’s safe.” Kenny adds shaking his head.

All of a sudden Kenny’s eyes widen and he tackles Eren to the ground covering him. Several arrows rain down from the sky hitting the Ackerman on his back. Eren opens his eyes seeing arrows everywhere and Kenny with blood coming out of his mouth. “Hey…brat…You must survive…I would die in shame knowing that the nation my ancestors fought to protect…would fall into the hands of your bastard brother…or our enemies.” He breathes heavily before passing away. Eren put his fingers on his neck feeling no pulse, tears are flowing down his eyes looking at the bodies of his father and Kenny. He reaches out for his mother's hand for comfort to let her know that he is alive. Her once warm hands were freezing cold causing Eren to scream in pain. His parents are gone, he is all alone in this cruel world. Why them? Why would anyone wish to target his family? Who are the enemies? It doesn’t matter who they were, he promise to wipe everyone out of this world every single one of them. Eren is helped out of the boat by a Garrison soldier named Hannes and is brought back to the Kingdom in one piece physically. When they arrive at the castle they are greeted by several soldiers and lords at the door. “The King is dead, long live the King” they chant while kneeling. Eren feels like vomiting, him? a king? He shakes of the feeling quickly and takes command.

“As you know we just lost Eldia’s two best rulers for centuries. As loved as my parents ar- were I refuse to believe that this was an inside job! I want all soldiers ready! We are at war! I also wish for the funeral to be held first thing tomorrow!” The whole nation mourned for a month and after the mourning period was Eren crowned King. The assassins were caught and it was revealed that they were soldiers from Marley. Marley and Eldia had issues for centuries but King Grisha and King Magath made peace. Near their borders was a conflict between the farmers which caused political instability between the nations all over again. Grisha was supposed to meet up with King Magath a week before his assassination but the Marlian had other plans. His wish was to assassinate the royal family and in mid chaos annexe Eldia. However, his plan failed as Eren didn’t die and took command quite quickly. Eren’s first order as king was to declare war on Marley and their allies. Many were impressed by Eren’s mature handling of the situation however behind that brave face was a mourning boy. Eren would have meltdowns in his bedroom as he felt like the world was eating him slowly. Mikasa was the only one that knew of his meltdowns and tried her best to comfort her friend. However, it could never wash away the feeling of loneliness. That was until he met his sun, you.

Eren’s thoughts are disrupted by you hugging him, he can feel your warm tears on his shoulders. All you can do is hold him and cry, you give him a long kiss on the forehead and all you can whisper is “I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry for what you went through” Eren is stunned by your actions and he breaks down while holding you around your waist. The room is just filled with your sniffs and breathing. “Eren, promise me. No more secrets.” You whisper “I promise,” he says melting into your warm embrace.

_________________________________________________________

#eren jeager x reader #eren jeager x you #eren yeager x black reader #eren yeager x reader #eren yeager x you #eren x you #eren yeager smut #eren jeager x black reader #eren jeager x y/n #eren x reader #eren jeager angst #eren jeager fluff #eren jeager smut #eren yeager angst #eren yeager x y/n #eren yeager fluff

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wordsmithwhumpsandfluff · 8 months ago

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Word!! I'm sorry, I know I'm not caught up in the Ollie concussion fic, I promise I'm gonna get to that this weekend 🙈 your most recent post gave me a plot bunny tho... How about hurt Aiden with caretaker Spirit? As in he gets beaten up on duty and Spirit is FURIOUS but also having to be gentle bc his ribs are hurt and he's a little concussed?

Other ask:

Can we have more of Aiden? I loved him in the 3 fics there is about him and I am obsessed 😍😂 ~🌼

Combining the results of the Spirit&Aiden poll with this amazing ask. I couldn’t help myself🤭. Thanks for this awesome idea Soup, and thanks for the initial ask 🌼anon!

Also, adding a lil twist to the end of this one👀

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One thing that genuinely surprised Aiden was that Spirit always texted him back fairly quickly. He loved that. She never texted first, but he didn’t mind that fact.

“So, who is it?”

Aiden almost jumped as Mikey—the officer who was mentoring him—came up beside him. Aiden went three shades paler and fumbled to put his phone in his pocket. He wasn’t supposed to be on it while on security duty at the mall.

Mikey laughed at his panic. “Y’know, you’re lucky you got stuck with me, kid. If you’d been put with Bryan or Adamson, then you would’ve been chewed out for texting whoever it is that’s making you smile like a moron.”

Aiden flushed, looking straight ahead and focusing on being alert. “I’m sorry, sir.”

Mikey shrugged. “It’s fine, kid.” Mikey was only in his early thirties, though he liked to try and convince people that he was still 27. He was funny and chill and good at his job, so Aiden really was glad that he got to work with this guy while on duty.

“Our rotation ends in ten minutes, kid. Thank God. Do me a favor and go get us a couple of coffees once we’re done here.”

Aiden smiled. “Yes, sir.”

It seemed like it would be another easy day. Aiden was glad and couldn’t wait for his shift to be over. He was planning to surprise Spirit at the music store where she worked in the mall so he could finally ask her out on a second date. He felt that he’d waited long enough.

Suddenly, there was shouting and a series of screams. Aiden’s head snapped towards the commotion, and Mikey took off running. Aiden followed.

At the mall’s technology store, there was a group of about six guys. About four had ski-masks, and the other two had regular face masks. All of them had bats and were breaking shelves, yelling at people, and grabbing phones and cameras and whatever else they could shove into a few large duffle bags.

Crud, Aiden thought, his hand going to his baton (he really wished he could have a taser already).

“Drop the stuff and put your hands in the air!” Mikey screamed, all chillness gone from his voice. He held up his taser, pointing it at the thieves.

Aiden clicked his walkie talkie. “This is Clark. Reece and I need backup at the Tech Shop. We’ve got six robbers here. I repeat, we need backup.”

Clearly, none of the guys were listening to Mikey. One of them even raised his bat and began to charge at him, but Mikey tased him.

Everything began to happen too fast. In a flash, suddenly a brawl had broken out, and Aiden was throwing punches as well before he realized it.

He grunted as he got struck multiple times in the ribs and gut. He could hear announcements on the mall’s speakers, notifying people of the robbery.

Adrenaline was pumping through Aiden as he fought back. A few guys managed to slip out though and ran for it. Aiden got one of them on the ground and was trying to get cuffs on him, but then received a swift kick to the head from one of the others. “C’mon, Zeke!” one of them yelled.

The force knocked Aiden to the side and had the world going fuzzy, his ears ringing, and both of the thieves got away.

The last things Aiden Saw before the world went dark was Mikey securing cuffs on one of the guys before walking over to him.

— — —

The music store closed as soon as word of the fight spread to all the businesses. People were being asked to quickly pay and leave, and employees were getting asked to go as soon as all the costumers were gone.

Spirit—aside from her annoying boss—was the last music store employee to leave. The mall was almost entirely cleared out by then.

Apparently, from what she heard, there was a robbery at a store not far from the music store. She was too busy dealing with an annoying Karen to even notice the commotion.

As Spirit was leaving the building, she saw an open ambulance and saw someone being wheeled on a stretcher towards it. At first, Spirit only noticed his uniform and just thought that he was one of the security guards who got caught up in the whole thing. Then, suddenly, she noticed and recognized his face. Even without his glasses and all of the bloodied bruises.

Aiden.

Spirit’s eyes widened and her stomach dropped. Without realizing it, she was making her way over towards the paramedics. “Aiden,” she called, worried and a bit scared. Spirit hated that feeling.

One of a few officers stopped her before she could get closer. “Miss, I’m going to have to ask you to stay back.”

Spirit frowned, brows creasing. “Is he okay? Did the robbers do that to him?”

The officer seemed annoyed. “Miss, this doesn’t concern you. Please just—”

Spirit scoffed and was about to retort something—probably something with a lot of angry curse words—when another cop came up to them.

“What’s going on over here?” the other cop asked. He also looked quite beaten up.

“I just want to know if Aiden’s okay,” Spirit said in a hard tone, heart racing.

The other cop raised a brow. “You know the kid?”

“Yes, he’s my—” Spirit froze for a second, her mind trying to come up with a word to describe what Aiden was to her. “—my friend.”

The other cop seemed to be much more understanding than the other. “Aiden’s in pretty rough shape. I’ll give you a ride to the hospital, if you’d like.”

The first cop seemed annoyed that this other guy had taken over the situation.

Spirit found herself nodding. “Yes, please.”

The officer led her to his police car. On the drive over, Spirit found out that this officer was named Mikey Reece, and he was Aiden’s mentor. Aiden had mentioned this guy to her once or twice in their texting conversations.

At the hospital, Spirit and Mikey had to wait for news on Aiden while tests were run. A few other officers came to ask Mikey some questions, and Spirit bounced her leg anxiously as she waited.

This whole situation gave her an uneasy feeling. She overheard a few things that Mikey was saying to the officers: six of them. . . bats. . . black face masks. None of that made Spirit super suspicious until she heard him ask what the name of the one he arrested was, and one of the other officers answered, “Jeremy Hernandez.” That name had Spirit wondering something.

Eventually, a doctor came out and explained that Aiden was slightly concussed and had a few fractured ribs. But aside from that, a small fever and a bit of bruises, he was fine. Awake and responsive.

The officers went into the room first to talk to Aiden and write a report. Then, after that, Mikey wanted to go in but had a higher ranked officer telling him to get himself checked out for injuries. So, Spirit went in to see Aiden alone.

Aiden was sitting up in his bed, bandaged and with some of the blood cleaned up. When he saw Spirit enter the room, he looked genuinely shocked. “What’re you doing here?”

She shrugged, looking serious. Stone cold, even. For some reason, thinking that someone had put Aiden in a hospital had her blood boiling. “Long story,” she said.

Aiden’s surprised look melted a bit and he smiled. “I think I should join your boxing classes. I’m not that great at fighting just yet.”

His comment was laced with a bit of humor, but Spirit remained grim. “Do you know who it was? The robbers?”

Aiden’s smile faltered a bit. “Not really. One of the guys was named. . . Zeke, I think? I don’t know. He could be anyone. They all had masks on, so no facial details.”

Spirit felt her whole body run cold even as she still felt hot with anger. “This guy named Zeke. . . did he have dyed hair? Kinda longish?”

Aiden’s brows creased. “What? Why do you—”

“Just answer the question.”

Aiden worked his jaw, seeming a bit confused and unsure as he nodded. “Yeah dark purple hair. But why—?”

“I’ll be back later,” Spirit stated, her voice low as she turned to walk out the door. She froze before she got to it, turning and going over to Aiden. Before he even comprehended what was happening, she hugged him, being gentle and not putting any weight on him since his ribs were fractured.

Aiden felt his whole body become warm and he melted in the hug a bit, getting butterflies in his stomach. She'd never hugged him before. He decided right then that he really liked her hugs.

Spirit pulled away and looked him in the eye. “I’ll be back later. Or, I might just text later. It depends on how pretty my face will still be in the next few hours.”

Aiden raised a brow, once again seeming confused. Spirit left before he could ask her what she meant.

— — —

Spirit hated her old neighborhood.

The air there reeked of cigarettes and cheap alcohol. There was always someone yelling in their house or at a neighbor, cats knocked over trash cans, and some of the worst people Spirit had ever met lived there.

Spirit went up to a house that she often avoided while growing up. The old man that used to live in it had died when Spirit was a Senior in high school, but the guy’s nephew—and Spirit’s old classmate—still lived there.

Zeke Danes opened the door, a lit cigar in his mouth and looking drunk. He had a black eye and a few other bruises that looked fresh.

Spirit scowled, and Zeke’s eyes widened and he grinned as he recognized her.

“Holy shit. Spirit Mitchel, as I live and breathe.” He took out his cigar, blowing smoke on her face. “To what do I owe this pleasure, hot-stuff.”

Spirit could hear other voices inside, laughing and talking. “Having a party?” Spirit asked, her hands forming into fists in her pockets.

Zeke shrugged, still smiling. “Kinda.” He ran a hand through his long purple hair.

“Let me guess,” Spirit said. “Henry, Javon, Mike, and Freddie?”

“Yeah,” Zeke nodded. “Just my buddies.”

“But Jeremy isn’t here.” The way she said it had Zeke’s smirk falling.

“What do you want, Spirit?” he asked, opening the door all the way so Spirit could see her other old classmates and neighbors scattered inside Zeke’s filthy living room. They had music playing that was suddenly turned down, and all of the guys in there were looking at Spirit curiously and suspiciously.

Spirit stood a bit straighter. She was just as tall as Zeke was, so she could look him directly in the eye. “You robbed a store at the mall today, didn’t you?”

They all snickered a bit.

“So what?” Freddie called from inside, and Spirit noticed that he had gotten more tattoos since she last saw him. “You gonna snitch?”

Spirit wasn’t going to snitch. After all, the saying was very much true: Snitches really didget stitches.

“You beat up a cop,” Spirit said. “The one our age. You got him pretty good.”

Zeke took another puff of his cigarette. “Get to the point, hot-stuff.”

“He’s my friend,” Spirit stated. “You hurt my friend, and now he’s in the hospital.”

All of the guys were silent for a second before laughing.

“Since when do you become friends with police, woman,” Javon laughed. “People like us don’ go around becoming buddy-buddy with cops.”

“Well, I’m not like you,” Spirit spat.

“Oh, but you are,” Zeke said, leaning closer and blowing more smoke on her face. “You’re just like us. You used to fight for extra money behind the school, remember? And we’ve all run from cops together before, baby. Ringing a bell?”

Spirit bared her teeth as her scowl deepened. “Keep your pants on, Zeke. And don’t you dare call me ‘baby’. And I stopped running around with you morons after tenth grade, so quit grouping me in with you guys.”

Zeke chuckled a bit, leaning back against the door frame. “So, did you just come here to pitch a little hissy-fit over us hurting your friend? A little pathetic, don’t you think?”

Spirit nodded. “If I was here just to pitch a fit, that would be pathetic.” Swiftly, she raised her leg and kneed Zeke in his groin, making him gasp and stumble back, doubling over and protectively cupping his throbbing manhood. “It’s a good thing I’m not pathetic.”

Zeke spat his cigarette out of his mouth, glaring at Spirit with tears in the corner of his eyes. “You bitch.”

The other four guys all got up, now looking annoyed.

Spirit cracked her neck and raised her fists.

Looked like she was just going to text Aiden tonight.

#Aiden officially has a guardian angel #Totally making a part 2 #spirit #aiden #Mikey just popped into my head and has found an apartment in the depths of my brain that he now lives in rent-free🥲#Mikey is going to LOVEEE watching Aiden's love-life #Also I'd just like to say that Zeke is a certified asshole #thebrilliantidiots #BTW - Spirit is totally winning that fight

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