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bolbianddolanhouse · 4 years ago

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BNHA self insert AU [Book 3]

New? Read here! Then here!

Part 1 - Part 2

Chapter 10.75: It’s Vinegar- Wha?- It’s Vinegar, Pussy

I’ve been taking notice of the servants, they all have distinct features and some of them seem to serve a particular family member when they come around. Which leads me to think that this servant that took the picture probably knows the most about the house. From what I remember from the hologram, this servant is male presenting with light skin, sun spots, salt and pepper hair with a very pronounced nose. Problem is, I haven’t seen him.

I had some afternoon tea by myself in the parlor as uncle Tensei did some calls to our extended family. Usually I hate having tea time, because it makes me feel like a pompous piece of shit rich boy and I prefer coffee anyways. But I took the tea this time to observe the servants. I learned that they all gather in the kitchen at 8pm to gossip before the non-live in servants have to leave for the day. So I snuck down to the kitchen to listen in.

“...Can you believe I served afternoon tea again! Ugh, when will I forget he’s dead now?!”

“I saw, nice save that you served it to Iwata-chan.”

“Man that kid beefed up! He used to be so timid and never show his power. But I saw the way he levitated those antiques with ease, kid is like his mother.”

“Maybe we’ll get to see more of the family now that he’s dead?! The mother is just so pleasant to be around.”

“Too bad Thad-kun won’t be here to see them spend more time at the estate. He loved Itati-sama and Tenya-sama.”

I peeked my head in “Who’s Thad-kun?”

The staff yelped and jumped at my sudden appearance.

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to startle you!” I bowed in forgiveness “But I couldn’t help but to overhear that there’s a servant that isn’t here anymore?”

“Yes, Thaddeus was one of the oldest servants here” spoke one of the female servants “he was the previous head of estate’s favorite servant, from Thad’s record, he was about 20 when the previous head of estate inherited the estate. Since then, Thad was in service of him and only him.”

“Yea, Thad-kun passed two years ago of the flu in his private quarters” spoke one of the chefs “Poor man didn’t have any family or children, just spent his whole life serving the Iida family. But he adored all the family that married in and the children, he took pictures of all the children when they’re newborns and puts them in this scrapbook.”

“Oh yea the scrapbook! Pretty sure it’s in the parlor bookcase” chimed in a younger servant “We hid it from the old head of estate, we were scared that he might destroy it or something. Anything to preserve the memory of our friend.”

“Yup, all of us feared that old man. But Thad-kun knew how to calm him and never missed a single tea time” said the chef “We have his journal in the parlor book case as well. There’s notes on what that old man liked in case he wasn’t around to serve him and we dip into it when anything comes up.”

“Hmm, I just might crack into them” I pondered “Thank you for sharing! Sorry for interrupting again, I’ll be taking my leave.”

“Any time Iwata-chan!” said all the staff as they waved bye to me.

I float my way to the parlor, trying to not make noise to catch the attention of my uncle or the other servants that have night duties. I search through the books to find an old green leather photo album and a worn black journal. I took the books to my room to look them over, the album had so many pictures of couples and babies with their names neatly written underneath the photo. It was so organized that I could trace back to who was my great-grand father! Apparently I came from a side branch family and that theres 4 branch families and one main, but the main family didn’t marry and had children to maintain lineage. So great grand uncle was the last one of the main family. I only know of one other branch family, the other two are a mystery to me. Getting to the end of the album, I put it to the side and opened up the journal. I get to an interesting part that reads:

March 14th,

I helped Iida-sama take down portraits in the Lineage Hall. He’s asked me to burn them but I don’t have the heart to do so. When he left for work, I hid them in the West wing linens closet. I can only hope he will forgive me someday. Erasing these people and only keeping the heroes this family is the work of a tyrant! Mothers, daughters and non-engine sons are to be celebrated with their hero relatives. May the next heir see the light and I’ll unearth the family hidden history.

The west wing linens closet?! Such a place exists?

-The next day-

“Tio, what’s the agenda for today?” I asked after breakfast.

“Today I’m going to check in with the agency on the phone” responded Uncle Tensei “then talk to the gardeners, then we plan for a welcome ball.”

“Oh uhhhhh can any of those things wait until tomorrow?” I got timid over the full schedule of things “because I found an important clue regarding the portraits.”

Uncle Tensei looked at me with intensity “The agency can wait, show me what you found.”

I showed them the journal entry “...so do you know wheres that linens closet?”

“Hmmm the West wing is used to store the decorative pieces of the estate for Balls or other events” pondered Tensei “Nobody in the family would think of finding something that important there since it’s a servant accessible area...”

We looked at each other and activated our arm engines to zip to the west wing. It was like we shared the singular brain cell at that moment and it was telling us to stop being civil and zoom. And sure enough, there was the portraits! Still in excellent condition and in their original frames. There were some without frames and they were portraits of the women that married in the family in the recent decades, the most recent one was of my mom. I looked at the portrait and was stunted by the artist’s capture of her natural beauty. The way they painted the flower crown and her curls, the exact shade of medium tan skin, the detail of the rebozo on her shoulders and the crisp white of the traditional dress. She was so young in this portrait and it made me wonder when this was taken.

“Oh my I remember when this one was painted” chuckled Uncle Tensei as he caught me gawking at the painting “Your dad had this arranged for your mom’s 24th birthday, months before they got married. These are usually done with traditional wear and since your mom isn’t Japanese, she showed up in that dress and shawl. All the women in the family were fawning over how beautiful her traditional dress was. The artist was so inspired by the flowers in her hair that he had he pose in the garden, making her portrait the only one painted in an outside setting.”

“Wow, she had that type of power over others huh?” I said in awe.

“She didn’t want to at first but the family painter convinced her that she was already the first ethnic woman to marry into the family, may as well make the portrait as unique as possible” a frown slowly crept onto his face “But then great grand uncle wanted the portrait scraped because she wasn’t in kimono and that she looked unkept with her down down and no makeup. Honestly, I feel like he didn’t want Tenya to marry her because of her ethnicity but turned a blind eye on that because she was a CEO and wanted to asset the company. Your dad had this whole plan to make a garden for your mother to frolic in when he gets the estate, with lots of flowers and fruit trees OH and the lily pond! It was going to take up like half of that empty lawn space in the middle.”

I looked at the portrait “So much fuss over this woman.”

“But she was worth it. Look at all the things she contributed to the family!” He started to describe “She doesn’t see it but she’s a blessing to us. We needed someone outspoken and bold to challenge great grand uncle’s tyrannic ways.”

That stayed with me for the rest of my time at the estate. I didn’t know what to think of my mom anymore, yes she’s amazing but she kept an important part of history from me and who know who else?! Finally, after 6 days of tolerating it, I was able to go home! And just in time! It’s the day before Christmas Eve and Lili is flying in today.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to drive you home?” asked Uncle Tensei as I take my bags to the front door “I don’t have any business to attend to today.”

“Naw Tio, I’m good” I sigh tiredly “I’m just a little sick of spending time together like this, as much as I love you as my uncle” I float my bags “I just wanna go home on my own and reflect on things.”

“I understand, every young man needs their time alone” Tensei smiled warmly “Have a safe journey home, see you in a few days.”

I wave good bye “Bye bye tio!” I turn my head to the servants that gathered around “Bye bye everyone else! Thank you for helping me find the critical clue in the portrait mystery!”

Everyone bid me good bye and safe travel until I was out of sight. From there I took a short train trip and two buses home, picking up a few interesting things along the way that I could gift. In total, it took about 3 hours to get home. Whole time I was just thinking of the ways I was going to confront mom about what I learned. The ways I could say how I feel, the ways she might react...I don’t know what to expect! And I’m super nervous. I stood at the front door for maybe 5 minutes because of how nervous I was! Finally mustering the courage to open the door with my eyes closed, the air of baked goods hit me first.

“I’m home” I announced myself, holding my breath to whoever answers.

“Iwata, you’re home” yipped the robo dog as it trots into view “Did you know it’s been 222 days since you’ve last been home?! I missed you very much and so has everyone else.”

I bent down to pet them “Has it? It feels longer than that” I booped their nose “I missed you too boy.”

“Mom is in the kitchen, Dad is picking up Lili at the airport, Hanaka is at her friend’s house and Tensei is practicing with their group” listed the robo “Everyone should be home before 7pm for dinner...it is now half past 4.”

I look at the clock thats mounted at the entrance to confirm the time, then looked down at the shoes. Mom’s were there in their usual spot and I kicked off mine in their usual spot. Now it feels like I’m home. I slowly made my way to the kitchen, and there she was, taking cookies out of the oven in her iconic floral apron.

“Mom? I’m home.”

“OH! Iwata! I didn’t hear you come in!” Mom squealed before setting down the hot tray to embrace me “I thought your were coming home tomorrow?!”

“Nah I’m sick of looking at Tio and doing rich people things” I gagged to drive my point “I left late morning and took public transport. I just really wanted to come home.”

“I understand mijo, I probably would’ve done the same” she pursed her lips and placed her hand on my face “Why don’t you settle back in? I’ll have some food ready for you if you’re hungry.”

My stomach growled in comedic timing “Heh, okay. I’ll go do that.”

My side of the room stayed untouched, as expected. Tensei was a good boy and doesn’t go through my things. I slammed myself face first into my bed and screamed into my pillow. GOD I missed my bed and the comforts of home! As I unpacked, I remembered what I was going to do and dreaded having to bring it up in casual conversation with her. I hid the device in my closet shelf, away from Hanaka’s prying eyes. When I finally showed myself downstairs, mom had my plate of food ready at my spot on the nook.

“How was things at the estate? Tensei hasn’t told me much other than it’s been busy.” Mom said as she washed her hands “Oh that reminds me! The school called tell me that you missed some finals and they’re letting you make them up the weekend before school resumes.”

I sat down “Things were weird mom. I learned way more than I asked for” I sighed and picked up my fork “I never want to be that rich and be without family! Did you know that the oldest butler hid the family portraits that the old man took down?! I didn’t know you had a portrait done with them.”

“You found it?! I thought that old man for sure destroyed it!” gasped Mom “It was a beautiful painting and a very sentimental art piece to your father. He wanted to keep it if the old man didn’t approve it to be hung in the estate, but before he could ask, it was gone! Or so we were told by the artist.” She sat at her spot to listen to me “What else?”

In between bites of chilaquiles, I told her of my time and who I spoke to. I tried to bring up what I wanted to confront to her about, but that look in her eyes and all her attention made me want more of her...I missed my mom and I as torn between all my emotions I was feeling. Wish I didn’t have to do this. Everyone came home and we were finally a full house. It felt so good to be in their company again, I didn’t even mind all the smothering this time! Suppose the confrontation has to wait.

-The next day, at breakfast-

“Damn B, it’s just spam and eggs with toast” said the twins, looking at Lili and me have a breakdown over our food.

Lili wipes her eyes “I KNOW! I have to cook for myself every meal” she pointed at her toast “I have to wake up at 6 in the god forsaken morning so I can buy bread like a peasant woman because there isn’t any chain grocery stores where I live in France!”

“I haven’t had a single decent meal since I lived in the dorms” I held my toast up gently “F in the chat for the toaster in the dorms that Beizu tore apart for parts in August.”

Lili held her toast up with me “F”

“Yall are so fucking weird” Hanaka said with a groan “You don’t see Oro and I do this shit.”

“Don’t make fun of your older siblings” scolded Dad with an arm chop “They’ve had a tough time being away from home. You’d understand once you have to cook for yourself everyday.”

“ANYWAYS! Mom, who’s coming tonight?” cut in Tensei.

“Oh ummm, Mr Hitoshi and his husband. Aunty Mimi with Nikita, uncle Jin, Mei and Beizu, Mr Tokoyami and Petti, the Ojiros” listed Mom “Aunty Midnight, Hoshi and the Midoriyas. So more people than usual.”

“Aw abuela and abuelito aren’t coming this year?” responded Tensei with a pout.

“They’re coming for abuelita’s birthday, so don’t get all pouty mijo” assured Mom “But after breakfast, we gotta get our butts in clean mode because Mr Hitoshi and his husband are coming at 3pm, they’re dropping the kids off at their grandparent’s then coming straight here.”

And so I got back into the swing of things, my winter chore is cleaning the bathrooms and making sure they’re fully stocked with toiletries. I was done before our first guests were supposed to come, so my mind raced with how I was going to talk to mom as I showered.

“You decent?” knocked Lili at my door.

“Yea, come in” I said as I was drying my hair “What’s poppin’?”

She threw her arms around me and squeezed me “I just wanted to come in and hug you” she pinched my arms “Damn boy, UA beefed you up! I couldn’t tell under your baggy sweaters.” She laughed “But forrealzies, how much did you inherit?”

“Straight to the point huh?” I leaned in to her ear “2 million dollars and all the old man’s collectables.”

“Shut the fuck up!” gasped Lili “So you and tio were the only ones on the will?! That’s pretty wack, I’m the oldest and dad is literally that man’s family!”

I sighed “It’s complicated but I’ll say that it all has to do with mom.”

“Damn, but what are you going to do with the money?” asked Lili curiously.

“Might buy myself a house and go to college, or save it if I get a really good job out of high school.” I flop onto my bed “Lili, do you ever feel like mom has been hiding something from you?”

“Yea, it’s a given.”

I turn my head to face her “Wait what?”

“It’s a given. I’m sure mom hid things from us to protect us or because it’s none of our business” She responded “She’s a reasonable person, maybe she’ll tell us eventually when she’s ready to tell us. I’ve been curious of mom too when I was in high school. Nothing made sense and I felt like maybe I wasn’t going down the right path, so I asked her what she did and it opened up her past. After that conversation, I had more respect for her and felt like I can be more open to her about what I’m curious about.”

“Do you think she’ll answer me if I ask her something?” I felt my stomach tie itself into knots “I learned so much about her from other people that I’m not sure if we know the same person.”

Lili put her hand on my back “She’s our mom, no matter what, she’ll love us.”

That made me feel so much better about what I was about to do. I took my calming breaths at the base of the stairs before facing mom in the living room. She was having some down time after slaving over the pot of Pozolé and Ponché, her face still red from the heat of the pots.

“Hey mom, ummm mind if I ask you something?”

“Sure mijo is everything okay?” responded Mom as I sat down in the arm chair adjacent from the couch “You seem kind of stiff.”

“I’m just nervous” I responded “I just... I learned alot of things about you these past months. And I have so many questions that I’m afraid of knowing the answers too.”

“What is it? You can ask me anything” Mom said, looking attentively “You have my full attention.”

It hurt to see her like this, especially with what I had to say.

“Why did you hide about the death of Beizu Iwata?” I asked, looking at her dead in the eye.

Her face didn’t budge from her expression “I didn’t? His death is public information-”

“Stop LYING TO ME!” I yelled “You know what I mean! He was Bei’s dad and you couldn’t save him, and you’re guilty of your incompetence so you had me to give his son a friend. And that’s my purpose isn’t it?! I’m just some living plaything!”

“Iwata why would you say such a thing! I didn’t-”

“SHUT UP I’M NOT DONE TALKING!” I raised my voice “You named me after him, I’m here to just fix your mistake aren’t I? And what about your lovechild with Mr Hitoshi?! Oh and not to mention on why you came over here alone at 15 years old!” I felt myself become tense in this mix of rage and the verge of tears “It’s like I don’t even know you! WHO ARE YOU?!” I felt the hot tears run down my face “and why are things so complicated?”

Mom was white as a ghost and frozen on the couch. And my yelling got the attention of my dad.

“Iwata El Roca Iida! What is the meaning of this!” demanded Dad as he approached us “You dare to yell at your mother in that tone?! What has gotten into you? I-”

Mom held her hand up, commanding dad to stop talking. She then got up, stood in front of me and got on her knees for the deep bow. I’ve never seen her do this before and I got scared.

“I’m sorry Iwata, please forgive me for all my mistakes” she lifted her head to show the tears creeping down her face “I know I’m not a perfect mother and I’m a very flawed human with a very troubled past, but please let me explain things.” She took a deep breath to stabilize her breathing “I named you after Beizu Iwata, he’s one of the few people that I trusted to run the company. He poured his everything into the company and I wouldn’t be as successful without him. His death devastated me, I chased after him when he ran back inside the burning building. When I begged him to get to safety and to leave everything behind, he looked at me and touched my stomach before breaking the 6th floor window to throw me out with a box in my arms. Of course somebody caught me before my body reached the ground and he reappeared a few minutes later. After his death, I learned that I was 2 months pregnant with you, he saved both of us mijo. If I stayed any longer, I risked losing you and I don’t think my heart could take another infant death.”

“Another infant death?” my eye widened “No, don’t tell me-”

“I’m afraid so” She tried really hard not to lose her composure “I lost my first baby that I had with Mr Hitoshi, I wanted to have them so badly. You don’t know how much it hurts to not have a family when you still need them, so you make your own. But it hurts even more when you lose the family you failed to build.”

“Ita, please stand up” gently begged Dad, on the verge of tears “Please love, you don’t have to re-live the trauma. It’s okay.”

“No Tenya, I have to say it. How will we move forward if I don’t say what happened in the past?” She couldn’t look at us and kept her head down to face her lap “I came here to protect my family...” She told me the whole story of what happened in America and her decision that changed her life forever “...And that’s my burden to bear. I wish things didn’t have to be like this and I could be with my family and made my dreams come true back home. I dedicate my life to making sure nobody has to every go through what I went through unless it’s their decision.” She looked at me “I understand that you might not want to associate with me after all this, but just know that I love you so much. I wanted to have you, to nurture you, to teach you that you are free to be whoever you want to be, to love whomever you want” Her expression was full of pain, like it was bottled for years and it’s now surfaced “I know of all the bad things that could hurt you and I shouldn’t let one of them be me. And I’m sorry that I have.”

I felt like the villain, making my mom re-live her trauma and tell me she’s a bad mother. She’s not a bad person, she’s lived a life full of tragedy and we’re the one good thing that went right. And after all that, she still has the capacity to tell me she loves me? I really don’t deserve to be her son. I levitated her up and ran into her for a tight hug.

“I’m sorry” I sobbed “I didn’t know! And I feel awful! I just thought that maybe-”

“It’s okay baby” She shushed me, stroking my hair “No more bad feelings, no more deceit. If you want to know something, don’t bottle it up, just tell me and I won’t turn you away.”

“Okay mom” I held her tighter “I’m sorry I ruined Christmas.”

“You didn’t ruin Christmas Iwata” chuckled Mom through her tears “Your tia set the Christmas tree on fire when I was like, twelve, and it burned all the presents underneath it.”

“Never mind that actually sucks” I laughed, pulling away from her “Then is everything cool?”

“Hmmm, I wouldn’t say that” Mom said, giving me her iconic career ending face “I cleared up and explained myself, now it’s your turn.” She levitates me so I wouldn’t run “Care to explain your little academic double life?”

“Huh? What are you talk-” It hit me, she knows about my double program enrollment “Oooooh, oof.”

“We’ve known since June” Dad spoke up with his arms crossed “Nurse Eri told us when she called to discuss your health exam. We talked to the school to confirm, so theres no use in lying your way out of this one Iwata.”

I looked at my parents and sighed in defeat “Fine, I enrolled myself in the Hero and Intel course after your Great Grand Uncle told me he was going to pay for my tuition. So to spite him later, I was going to show him that I got both and decide to be an agent instead of a hero to break the streak of heroes in the family.” I felt like a trapped animal awaiting death “He insulted my family and I used my favoritism as my upper hand to get back at him that I am my mother’s son and so what?! Fuck that viejo and his hateful ass, I’m half latino!”

“You really are your mother’s son” said Dad in disbelief “It’s like looking at your mother when she was your age, same pettiness and pride!” He cleared his throat “But that doesn’t mean we aren’t going to punish you for lying to us on why you’re always stressed! You know better than to overwork yourself.”

“And on top of that, I had someone on the inside tell me about the device and the old school files” Mom added “So you peeked and meddled into my personal business ey?! And all you did was hurt yourself. We have no choice but to issue capital punishment to you AND Beizu.”

I gasped “You leave him out of this! He’s innocent!”

“Can’t do, he’s your accomplice” Mom pulled out her phone to show me texts “One of the perks of having friends that work in a school is that you have watchful eyes on your children at all times.”

“Damn you got us” at that moment, I knew I was about to hate my life.

“We’ll come up with a group punishment later, but we agreed that you’re to be sentenced to house arrest for the rest of the winter break” Mom crossed her arms “AND we’re taking away cursing privileges, starting now.”

I gasped “NOOOO! Anything but capital punishment!”

The doorbell rang, it was our first guests.

“Hey I brought- oh are we interrupting something?” Mr Hitoshi said walking into the living room.

“Not at all! Just issuing punishment” Mom puts me down and turns to the two men “Iwata was just talking about you Hitoshi!”

“Oh yea? About what?” chuckled the purple haired man as took a seat.

Mom motioned to me “Iwata, care to share with him?”

I gulped the guilt lump I had in my throat “I know about your and my mom’s baby and their death was the reason you left my mom.”

Mr Hitoshi’s face turned white “How did you- There’s no way!”

“He got real nosey and hurt his own feelings” Mom summarized it “Oh you brought the saké! Bring the cups out Tenya!”

“What else did you learn Iwata?” asked Mr Neito.

“I learned that you, um, did the deed with my mom” I cringed “Many times, in the dorms and a few times in the workrooms at school.”

“YOU WHAT?!” screamed Dad with a tray of specialty drink ware.

“Oh don’t act surprised Tenya!” Mom put her hands on her hips “It was totally obvious! I lost my virginity to him. And I rewarded him with intimacy after training and in turn, became a decent person.”

“Yup, sorry Tenya that you got my sloppy seconds” responded Mr Nieto unapologetically “But as I said at your wedding, good for you that you got a woman that can really spice things up.”

“I thought you meant that she’s a good cook!” Dad defended himself “Not that you two had a thing in the past?!”

“Join the club, I didn’t know either until she dropped off the wedding invite” Hitoshi said as he poured the saké “But I’ll drink to that!” He handed each of us a little cup of the alcohol and raised his glass “To Ita and her bomb pussy game, it was the one thing I missed the most.”

“Kampai!” cheered everyone but my dad and I.

I downed my cup and held it out again “Imma need another cup so I can forget that chief.”

I waited patiently for Beizu to come so I can hold his hand as we get flamed my our moms with the group punishment. And when he did, his face was puffy from crying and we just held each other for the brief moment we had before getting flamed. Our mom’s agreed that the group punishment was no sleepovers the entire break and one week of intense training with aunty Mimi. I didn’t know what to do, other than go up to my room with Beizu for blanket fort time.

“Iwa, we were so wrong about things” Beizu said softly as he put his head on my chest “but I’m happy it wasn’t that way. I couldn’t imagine a life without you, it’s the one thing I’m certain about.”

I smiled and stroked his hair “Me too, we’re two halves that can’t be left incomplete.” I thought about my inheritance “When we get older, would you go on a vacation with me or co-own a house with me?”

Beizu thought about it for a minute “Hmm, I’d co-own a house with you. Because then we can spend everyday with each other.”

“What if we do both?”

“Even better but I’m just thinking of all that money we’d need to do that” explained Beizu “the house is a better investment.”

“Okay, say I inherited 2 million dollars and I want to spend it on us, now what would you say?”

His eyes widen “You did not just inherited 2 million?!” Beizu was in disbelief “I’d probably just marry you at that point. Hell, lets get married right now!”

I laughed and brought him in for a hug “Let’s get married and spend all of our money on pillows and our favorite foods. Living easy for the rest of our lives.”

He held me tight “That’s my dream, to be with you forever.”

So maybe Christmas wasn’t ruined by me and I was just being latino-in-a-telenovela dramatic. I feel so much more like myself now. Year two of this shit is really happening!....wonder if it’s gonna rock my shit.

Chapter 10.75, End

#bnha #mha #self insert au #book 3 chapter 10.75 #not canon #will update regularly #ask me anything #//Palma-sama Speaks #Iwata fucked around and found out really hard this time! But finally the confrontation!#Not gonna lie... I cried writing the forgiveness part and I'm a big baby!#I hinted a few things that will show up toward the end of this book...yall gonna go feral over it #Lili is back for a bit bc I know she's some of yall's fave. If you're confused on who she is plz read Book 2 to get acquainted with her #A nice soft moment with the boys to close off the arc uwu bc the plot gets heart wrenching after this lmao #chapters are still on an inconsistent schedule bc school is continuing to kick my ass... F in the chat for my sanity

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ninety6tears · 4 years ago

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king-of-exchanges letter

Wooo kingofexchanges is happening again!

I’m a big fan of SK but only somewhere in the middle of my consumption/obsession; with King being heavy on self-referencing and crossover-friendly treatments, I’d be happy for you to mix and match any of my requests, as long as you can see from my goodreads page that I’ve read the relevant stuff.

Basic preferences: I read everything from G-rated to explicit PWP. I love pastiche for lit fandoms but something that feels more off the beaten path of the original style can also be fun.

I love: Angst, pining, subtle UST, first times, or established relationships with some level of conflict to be resolved. Intense friendship stories. Protectiveness in close relationships as well as in those that wouldn’t obviously appear to be protective at first. A character or characters experiencing a type of attraction that isn’t the status quo for them. Relationships that had a falling-out and neither of them ever really got over it. Characterization that focuses on the nature & nurture of who people have grown to be and the unique ways they take care of or need other characters. Insecurity/hangups over worthiness. AUs of all varieties.

I can handle: underage, dubcon, noncon, torture and incest. Character death. Love triangles. Infidelity.

Do Not Want: Fix-its without sacrifice/troubles. Soulbonding/magical soulmate tropes. Disputes centered around marriage as a show of commitment ("If you were really serious you'd have proposed by now rather than just wanting to live together" and all that). A/B/O, mpreg, or any body fluid kinks. More than a mention of Alzheimer’s/dementia.

Christine ‘83 (FIC):

Arnie/Dennis

Arnie/Christine/Dennis

---NOTE - The movie is more fresh in my mind for prompting purposes but I have read the book, so feel free to run with this request for either version. I do like the dark humor Carpenter brings to adolescence without mocking the angst of being a teenager, not that King isn’t morbidly funny in his own right.

We get very little of them together before Arnie starts to go all possessed but we can tell their friendship has lasted a lot of changes over the years. That hospital visit over the holiday (which I remember was more bittersweet, less tense in the book?) feels like the last time Arnie remembered that he's supposed to be a big part of Dennis’ life. But even before all that, there’s a nice dynamic where Dennis is protective of Arnie and really thinks highly of him (and huh, maybe sees something in his looks other people don’t) when it’s not socially advantageous for him to retain that loyalty, and I’d like to get more of that. Maybe they’ve fooled around once or twice? Maybe Arnie was the one who got weird about it, afraid of the eventual rejection, or they’re both just too repressed? I like the triangle with Leigh too, if you wanted to get into the confused jealousy/conduit attraction thing, just nothing that completely dismisses any meaning of her relationship with Dennis if it’s referenced at all.

If Dennis was the one Christine got dangerously jealous of (either because something happens between them or she just knows) how would that go down differently? Or what if the car decides she wants to be shared by them, and maybe likes to watch them do things to each other (take that however you want it to mean) and either their closeness makes the two of them eventually snap out of it, or they all just become a weird evil threesome? I'm also into the idea of some other fantasy/sci-fi AU in which Christine is something or someone else entirely but is still threatening in some paranormal/inhuman way.

Crossover Tags (FIC):

Peter McVries & Ray Garraty & The Stand

Peter McVries/Ray Garraty & The Stand

---I’m interested in how these two would fit into a story with such an elemental moral war. Both are reckless but McVries more prone to hopelessness and nihilism; would he be tempted to join Flagg without outside influence? Would he just kind of wander around with no sense of purpose until Ray found him? It could also turn the existential misery of The Long Walk on its head, with them losing their families and possibly realizing too late the preciousness of life that way. You don’t have to get into much philosophy or plot either; I’m kind of into the everyday pain-in-the-ass minutiae of the post-apocalypse and people finding ways to laugh about their circumstances and reach for each other in their grief. Feel free to write it as full-on crossover with some of the canon Stand characters appearing.

Larry Underwood & Richie Tozier

---If you have some other idea of where to put these two together, go for it, but I had this idea of Richie hosting an occasional interview special for up-and-coming musicians and Larry being invited on when the single’s just out and being so nervous to meet this famous personality, and maybe they get drunk or high together before or after the interview (bonus points if Larry can hardly get in an answer cause Richie gives him the giggles). They’re kinda both assholes so they get along? They’re both assholes so they kinda hate each other? I didn’t nominate it as a shippy treatment but if you’re really sad I didn’t, hey, stuff happens when people party.

The Dark Half (FIC):

Alan Pangborn/Thad Beaumont

Alan Pangborn/Elizabeth Beaumont/Thad Beaumont

George Stark/Alan Pangborn

---I thought the surprising friendship and trust that takes hold between Thad and the officer who initially believes him to be a cold killer was one of the better aspects of this novel, and the way that connection is so soon polluted by Stark's insurmountable connection to a part of Thad’s psyche is chilling and more than a little sad. I would love to get a shippy treatment of their immediate companionship and/or the inevitable disturbance of it. If you wanted to make it a poly thing with Elizabeth, with all three of them not really pausing in the midst of all these maddening things happening to question opening their marriage to someone they find comforting, I would be interested in how that might underscore the events.

And when it comes to George/Alan...yeah, I want darkfic, potentially outlining Stark’s role in putting Alan off Thad in a more sinister way, whether it’s poisoning the well of Alan’s (sublimated? not yet acted on?) desire and affection for Thad by being sleazily flirtatious in pointing it out, or going to a darker noncon place with all the mingled disgust and misplaced attraction that might provoke. (In the context of this prompt, I’m not super into the gross-out factor of Stark being at the stage where his skin is falling off, but if you can’t somehow set it at an earlier stage it would be better to just not mention it.)

Also, I realize Alan has a family, but you can deal with that however you want; his wife can just not exist for the purposes of the story, but even infidelity wouldn’t put me off if you’re taking the character that far out of a healthy mindset.

The Long Walk (FIC):

Peter McVries/Ray Garraty

---Since we’re never in Pete’s head, it would be great to get anything detailing how his initial distance from Ray quickly erodes into the protectiveness he obviously can’t help over him, if there’s a spark of empathy there even before the first time Ray saves him, or what he’s really thinking or trying to say at some of his more cynical and cryptic moments. I wonder what it was that Parker said to him to imply he thought he and Ray were “queer for each other” and how this apparently was covered without McVries feeling the need to deny it?

If you wanted to write them both somehow surviving, I would love to see how their relationship remains in the aftermath; maybe they don’t exactly end up together because they associate each other with this traumatizing thing, and they have an essential but troubled friendship because of it (and maybe they end up fucking a couple times but don’t really talk about it).

In the realm of more absolute alternate universes...a bigoted boarding school atmosphere, an aggressive correctional camp, anything where a compulsive make-out might happen in the bunks or the showers and then be stiffly denied later on sounds like a backdrop I’d love for these boys if you want to do something bleak-but-not-as-mortally-bleak.

I prefer to think of McVries as having complicated depression that doesn’t just stem from girlfriend problems; I’d prefer you mention the incident with Priscilla as little as possible, but any focus on Pete’s scar is totally fine.

The Stand (ART):

Larry Underwood/Lucy Swann

Lucy Swann/Larry Underwood/Nadine Cross/Randall Flagg

Nadine Cross

---My attempts to prompt for art for these tags may be unhelpful but I’m really into Nadine’s scary paranormal bond with Flagg, the imagery of her hair and Flagg’s tainted handsomeness and everything haunted about her and her life, and how the love triangle with her and Larry and Lucy is really a quadrangle of temptations and baggage beyond the usual moral pressure of romantic entanglements. They’re all figuratively in bed together whether they like it or not, but I could see that presented more literally in art. I also would like anything associated with the individual permutations (Larry/Nadine, Larry/Lucy, Larry/Nadine/Randall?). Desperate/melancholy embraces, or moments of almost touching. That ghost leering over Nadine’s shoulder in her moments of getting too close to tenderness.

#stephen king #christine #the dark half #the long walk #the stand #it

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kurtbastian-land · 6 years ago

Text

I Would

Summary: It was another typical day with the Warblers. Blaine has found a new crush and decides the most appropriate way to confess to him is through a song. Who cares if they’ve only met and talked once? It’s not like his soulmate would have a boyfriend... right?

“He is just amazing, you guys. He’s funny, beautiful and his voice. You should hear his voice. I swear, it’s like angels talking to me.”

Sebastian raised an eyebrow at the gushing Blaine Anderson was making as he entered the music room for the usual Warbler’s practice. It wasn’t that he has anything against Anderson. His family was as rich as he was, and Sebastian could see the appeal the latter have on some of the guys in school. Hell, even he tried to tap that when he first transferred but then he realises that Blaine Anderson was... well... kinda bland. Kinda like... flour. Not that he has anything against flour either. Flour is pretty useful, making the most delicious pastries that Sebastian grew up eating whereas Blaine makes funny faces and screeches whenever he tries to put emotions to songs.

“Aww, look, the excited puppy looks as though he’s going to wet himself over a boy,” Sebastian cooed as he took his usual spot on the couch, “the last time I checked, that Jeremy dude, or whatever his name was from the GAP attack incident, wasn’t that remotely breathtaking.”

“It’s Jeremiah, Seb,” Blaine corrected the latter, “and he’s nothing like Jeremiah. I would introduce you to him but he’s too good for you. And I don’t want you trying to get him into bed for just a night.”

“You’ve talked to him once,” Sebastian pointed out because someone had to and it’s clearly not Blaine’s fanboys. The amount of times Blaine falls for a guy is getting close to ridiculous.

“Once is enough to know if you’re someone’s soulmate.”

Rolling his eyes at the haughtiness tone Blaine decided to take upon, Sebastian resisted the urge to gag and leaned back into the sofa, placing his legs on the coffee table. It was no secret that Sebastian loves to flaunt his promiscuity to others, an image he held up proudly, like a badge of honour even if they weren’t quite as true as they were in the beginning. Fishing out his phone from his slacks, a small smile made its way on his face as he opened up his latest text.

Quickly typing a response, Sebastian threw a glance at Blaine who was still avidly talking about his new crush and how it was so obvious that the latter was into him. Sometimes, he wonders what is it like to be Blaine. To be so wonderfully naive, to have his head so stuck up in his own ass. Must be terribly... awful, Sebastian decided. Well, one thing’s for sure, he can’t wait to see the mess of this next serenade is going to be.

“Okay guys, he’s over there. With his group of friends,” Blaine nudged his head towards the direction of the object of his interest.

The Warblers were standing at the entrance of The Lima Bean, in their trademark blazers, taking a quick peek at a group of high schooler happily chatting in the coffee shop, trying to figure who has caught their leader’s heart after one meet up.

“Can we just get this over and done with,” Sebastian complained as he pocketed his phone, clearly displaying no interest in Blaine’s boy, “position Warblers.”

On command, the Warblers shifted into their assigned position, with Blaine front and centre, as always, regardless of the occasion. The moment Blaine opens the door, the Warblers at the back began to harmonize a tune that has been familiarised over the past week.

Lately I found myself thinking

Been dreaming about you a lot

And up in my head I'm your boyfriend

But that's one thing you've already got

The Warblers entered the establishment uniformly, quickly shifting to wear places could fit them. Clearly, Blaine didn’t take into consideration the tables and chairs that would be present during their performance.

Sebastian squinted slightly, as he tried to figure out who is Blaine exactly singing to amongst the group of students that were sitting around the table. Obviously the blonde and the short brunette were out of the question, because, duh, girls. So what was only left in the group was a giant of a teen, another blondie with lips you can see from a mile away and... Kurt?

He drives to school every morning

While I walk alone in the rain

He'd kill me without any warning

If he took a look in my brain

Oh no no no. The hobbit wouldn’t. He wouldn’t be so fucking stupid to...

Sebastian watched as Blaine broke away from the Warblers, walking straight to the dumbfounded Kurt, eyes wide open, mouth agape, face turning a shade of red Sebastian have yet made Kurt turn to. And honestly, it’s pissing him off a little that he wasn’t going to be the first one to do so. That wasn’t the only thing pissing him off. His eyes started to twitch as Blaine got closer to his target.

Would he say he's in L-O-V-E

Well if it was me then I would, I would

Would he hold you when you're feeling low

Baby you should know that I would

Would he say he's in L-O-V-E

Well if it was me then I would, I would

Would he hold you when you're feeling low

Baby you should know that I would

I would

“Okay, hobbit!” Sebastian barked when Blaine grabbed Kurt’s hand, pulling him up to his feet, “I normally wouldn’t care who you make us serenade to, because it’ll always end up to you embarrassing yourself but you singing to my boyfriend is where I’m drawing the line.”

The Warblers watched in stunned silence as Sebastian took large strides away from the group, shoving Blaine aside, causing the latter to stumble slightly as he placed his arm around Kurt’s waist, pulling him close. Whispers and murmurings could be heard almost immediately at the sudden turn of events.

“Looks like inappropriate Blaine struck again.”

“Does he have like a checklist to complete or something? First outing a guy, now serenading to someone unavailable. What’s next? Singing to a straight guy?”

Blaine immediately flushed when the Warblers started chattering behind him. “I.... but...” Blaine stuttered at the sudden turn of events

Clenching his jaw, he pointed accusingly at Sebastian who was currently glaring at him. “You knew about this the whole time and you didn’t think to tell me that you’re dating Kurt?”

“You didn’t even mention his name, you idiot,” Sebastian snapped at the latter.

“I pointed at him when we were outside!”

“Have you ever seen me giving a fuck about who’s your latest crush?”

Eyes were constantly moving back and forth as Blaine and Sebastian continued to argue, no one willing to give in over the latest mess.

“What would Kurt ever see in a manwhore like you,” Blaine sneered, tilting his chin upwards to make up for the lack of height he has against the latter.

“That’s enough Blaine,” Kurt cut in sharply, eyes throwing daggers at the boy who decided it was appropriate to suddenly start serenading to him in a public establishment, with no warning whatsoever and still had the decency to try and put the blame on Sebastian.

“I don’t know you. I’ve met you once, on pure accident because you looked like a sad puppy who got kicked in the stomach multiple time.”

“But...”

“I’ve met you once and I did not lead you on or showed any signs in being interested. I’ve. Met. You. Once.” Kurt emphasised, stressing each word, hoping that it’ll get through Blaine’s apparent thick skull that is currently being protected by an equally thick gelled down hair, “and quite frankly, I don’t want to want to be friends with you if you happen to think slut-shaming my boyfriend is appropriate.

Smiling to himself, Sebastian couldn’t resist placing a quick kiss on Kurt’s temple before quickly sticking out his tongue at Blaine. “Yea hobbit, I would. So you can scurry your little ass away and take the corny ass song with you.”

Blaine opened and closed his mouth, trying to figure out the words to say to somehow make himself look better. But when he couldn’t, Blaine snapped his mouth shut and turned around to storm off. The Warblers started at each other awkwardly, not knowing what to do or say, their minds trying so desperately to wrap around the most pressing news at the moment.

Sebastian Smythe, Dalton’s residential playboy, has a boyfriend. A serious boyfriend.

Thad awkwardly cleared his throat, nodding in Sebastian’s direction. “I’ll take it that you’re staying here while the rest of the Warblers take their leave?”

Sebastian grinned and gave a little wave to send them off. Once they were out of sight, Sebastian turned to Kurt, eyebrow raised, “so Blaine was the self-absorbed guy you were talking about?”

“So the serenade you’ve been preparing this past week was for me, led by Blaine?” Kurt shoots back, a teasing glint in his eye.

Before Sebastian could reply, he noticed Kurt’s group of friends staring at them wide-eyed, especially the brunette with bangs and one ugly as hell animal sweater. Sebastian raised an eyebrow and gave a small wave. That seemed to wake the girl in some kind of trance as she stood up, chair screeching against the marble floor.

Kurt quickly turned around and noticed Rachel standing, finger pointing accusingly to his boyfriend. “Oh no,” he muttered under his breath, “please do-“

“SPYYY!” Rachel screeched, causing the other patrons of the coffee shop who went back to minding their business, quickly turned to see what kind of commotion these high schoolers are making now.

“Friends of yours babe?” Sebastian winced at shrillness of her voice.

Kurt nodded his head begrudgingly as he buried his face into the crook of Sebastian’s neck.

“Do you mind if we could-“

“No Bas, I am not going to switch Rachel for Blaine.”

“Damn it.”

#kurt hummel #kurtbastian #sebastian smythe #blaine anderson #lol!blaine #kurtbastian fic #my fic #song: one direction - i would #warblers

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buckyandsteeb · 8 years ago

Text

Fic: Ace of Diamonds, King of Hearts

Summary: Blaine Anderson knew his wasn’t normal when he was 11. It took him a little while to realize how different that was. Kurt Hummel was never what anyone expected. With Blaine, Kurt would learn even more about why that was. *Finn Hudson is a somewhat common character later in the fic

Note: So I found out from my beta (And then reblogged) the meaning of Ace cards of the deck and as you can see it ended up being the opposite of what I first meant. But still I was very excited. [Now Kurt’s the ace of diamonds and Blaine the King of Hearts] Don’t go search for it until you finish this chapter. It’s a spoiler.

Prologue / Chapter 1

Chapter 2: Ao3 / FF

Telling Kurt turned out fantastic. Kurt liked him too

Blaine had a real boyfriend. A boyfriend that he knew was out of his league.

He couldn’t help but hold Kurt’s hand for the rest of the day. He was disappointed when it was time for Kurt to go home for the evening.

His disappointment disappeared when they had their third, four, fifth and sixth kiss right outside Blaine’s dorm room.

Like the gentlemen he tried to emulate, he walked Kurt down to his car and watched him drive away.

When he got back to his room, he logged on Facebook and made it official. It would take awhile for Kurt to confirm given he was still driving, but Blaine was too excited to wait.

Notifications were soon coming in. Embarrassingly his mom was on of the first to comment on it, gushing over how her little boy had a boyfriend.

He expects there is going to be backlash with his family. But he hoped that it would happen after Kurt had confirmed their relationship. He didn’t really want to expose Kurt to anyone in his family except his Mom and Coop. Although Coop was debatable.

To distract himself, he decided to go through his closet and pick out outfits for dates. He needed to somehow rise up to Kurt level of perfection. He wondered if he could just ask for Kurt to pick out his clothes. The thought was extremely appealing.

The next morning Blaine woke up early. He had to look perfect for his first full day of being Kurt’s boyfriend. It had only been fourteen hours twenty three minutes and thirty four seconds since he first kissed Kurt.

He still wanted to shout about it, he was so happy. His first boyfriend was a sweet talented gorgeous considerate boy.

He honestly didn’t think he’d ever have a boyfriend, let alone in Ohio. He thought that he’d have to wait til he moved to New York to even meet someone he’d be interested in. But instead fate and the universe brought him Kurt.

Blaine headed down to the school entrance, musing over whether he should grab them coffee. He dismissed the thought realizing it would be harder to kiss Kurt with a coffee in his hand. And he really didn’t want to prevent that.

When Kurt’s car drove into the parking lot, he had to control the urge to go open the car door for Kurt, even though his instincts were screaming. He didn’t want to give Kurt the idea that he was clinging or that he thought Kurt couldn’t do things for himself. He knew Kurt was completely capable.

Blaine carefully watched Kurt as he walked towards him. How did Kurt look so gorgeous in his uniform?

“Hi.” Kurt said breathlessly when he was right in front of him

“Hi.” Blaine grinned darting forward to kiss Kurt hello.

When he pulled away, Blaine took Kurt’s hand and lead him inside the building to head to their first classes.

“I got you your morning coffee,” Kurt smiled dopily at Blaine.

“I almost brought you yours.” Blaine admitted taking the cup from Kurt and taking a sip. He had to control a groan at how amazing it tasted.

“Great minds think alike,” Kurt grinned taking a sip of his own coffee. “Tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow,” Blaine agreed

All too soon they had to go their separate ways as the warning bell chimed.

Blaine spent most of his morning classes distracted and daydreaming.

He was very glad he didn’t have any tests coming up. The school knew that the Warblers were going to Regionals in a week, so they planned accordingly not wanting to make them choose between studying and the Warblers

He couldn’t decide what way to doodle his name in the margins of his notes, so he did them all. Dozens of BA+KH, Blaine Hummel or Kurt Anderson, some Hummel Anderson, Anderson Hummel and a few BDA+KEH

While he was distracted, one of the Warblers threw a paper ball at his head. He picked it up quickly when the teacher turned around.

/This new love phase needs to end before you sing your duet, Blaine. Don’t cost us Regionals/ -Thad

Blaine wrote back:

/We won’t cost the Warblers Regionals, Thad. and it’s not a phase/ - Blaine

He threw it back purposely hitting Thad.

By lunch the rest of the council had weighed in. Wes thought it would add more to the performance. David felt the heart eyes Blaine and Kurt showed when together might change the performance. Thad thought that with it being Ohio, it might upset the judges to see two boys in a relationship singing a duet.

Blaine accepted their opinions, but left before they could turn lunch into a another Warblers meeting again. He caught Kurt just as he exited.

“Trust me, you don’t want to eat here, Kurt.” Blaine warned leading him away from the lunch room. “The council won’t mind their own business.”

“Nick, again?” Kurt sighed. He was always getting in trouble for ‘non sanctioned’ activities

“No. You and me.” Blaine admitted still annoyed.

Kurt groaned at the thought. “And what did we supposedly do?”

“Thad’s trying to take away our duet.” Blaine rolled his eyes. “He thinks that we’d offend the judges”

Kurt moved forward, Blaine tried to catch him before he got back to the lunch room. He failed. But still followed him in where he was making a beeline toward the Warblers

Kurt abruptly sat down at the Warblers table.

“Thad, I hear you want to bow down to homophobia?” Kurt glared

“I just think it be easier to secure a victory if we’re not pushing a gay couple at the judges.” Thad responded fearfully. “There’s a time and place, Kurt.”

“I thought the Warblers were suppose to have integrity!” He looked at the other Warblers and they all nodded feeling shameful of Thad’s thoughts.

Trent stood up. “I don’t want to perform if Kurt and Blaine can’t sing together”

Jeff seconded it.

Wes stood up “All in favor of Kurt and Blaine singing their duet?”

Three quarters of the Warbler’s voted in favor, with only a few backing up Thad.

“The motion passes.” He hit the table with his gavel

“This is what I meant Kurt.” Blaine whispered, leaning down so his arms were draped around Kurt’s neck. “Wes will turn any disagreement into a Warbler meeting. And Thad’s afraid of change.”

Afternoon classes seemed to drag on for Blaine. In his study hall, all anyone wanted to talk about was their girlfriends and boyfriends; Mostly they discussed how far they’d gotten with them.

Blaine thought it was a little vulgar to be discussing that in the middle of class. Besides he was trying to finish his essay on what actions were used to prevent casualties in WWl.

They asked him about Kurt until Blaine finally relented “A gentleman doesn’t discuss such matters.”

“So either Kurt’s a prude or you’re having kinky sex?” one of the boys, Edwin asked.

“That is none of your business.” Blaine replied as he turned the page looking for the publishing date for his Work Cited.

“According to Trent, there’s a rumor going around about us.” Kurt told Blaine in greeting.

“Is it any good?” Blaine smiled kissing Kurt’s cheek and taking his hand to walk with him.

“Someone claimed they saw us um- having sex in the library” Kurt turned red in embarrassment.

“I wish I didn’t get where that came from,” Blaine sighed. “Edwin Windshire and his friends were discussing their own sordid affairs, while I wrote my essay and tried to ignore them.”

Kurt nodded in understanding. “Devin Sherwood was discussing the same thing.”

“It’s not a very good rumor. Especially when you add the rumor when I first came to Dalton.” Blaine mused. “I was still recovering and the rumor mill painted me as someone who got into a fight and was kicked out their last school.” Blaine laughed at the absurdity.

“Still recovering? From what?” Kurt asked concern.

“Wait, did I never tell you why I came to Dalton?” Blaine asked, looking up thoughtfully

“You haven’t,” Kurt confirmed

“Well… last year I went to West Lima. I came out and people didn’t like it. Then the Sadie Hawkins Dance happened.” Blaine nervously played with Kurt’s hand. “I had a friend, the only other out student and I thought we could go together to show people it didn’t matter and we were normal.”

“Oh, Blaine. I don’t think I like where this is going.” Kurt said fearfully.

“We ended up getting the crap beaten out of us.” Blaine winced remembering how much it hurt. “I woke up in the hospital and my friend had already moved to California. I had a broken wrist, rib and leg.”

Kurt gathered Blaine up in his arms as he started to cry. “It’s okay, honey. It’s over now.”

Inside Kurt was furious with these people who hurt his Blaine. He felt awful though for the relief that McKinley had never gotten that bad for him.

“I haven’t been to any of the Dalton/Crawford mixers” Blaine admitted, “I tried once but it didn’t go well.”

“That must have been hard” Kurt sympathized.

The week went fast for Kurt and Blaine. Soon it was Saturday. The day they planned to tell Kurt’s friends and family about them.

“What if they don’t approve of me?” Blaine worried on the ride into Lima

“I don’t care what they think. I know I approve of you. And that’s enough.” Kurt reassured. He leaned over at a stoplight and kissed Blaine gently.

Kurt moved when the light turned green and only moments later, pulled into the mall parking lot.

They both got out of the car and met in the back to take each other’s hand.

“I only invited the girls.” Kurt reminded “And if you don’t want to listen to who’s pairing off this week, I’d say clear of talking about the McKinley boys.”

“Noted,” Blaine smiled as the went through the doors of the mall. “I still can’t believe you found a brunch place in Lima”

“Rachel did actually.” Kurt admitted. “I don’t know much about it. She started talking about her dads. And you know how risky that is.”

“Promise our kids won’t be-” Blaine stopped suddenly in alarm covering his mouth. “I’m sorry, it’s way too early for me to start talking like that.”

Kurt restrained himself from hopping up and down in excitement. Sure it was too early in their relationship. But it was nice to know Blaine thought of a future with him in it.

“Kurt!” Mercedes got up from her seat and ran up to them. She hugged both of them each. “So I see your holding hands?” Mercedes teased.

“Yes, we’re together, Cedes,” Kurt grinned.

She hugged them both again. “So what happened?”

“Nuh uh,” Kurt tsked, “You’ve got to wait till everyone gets here.”

Kurt groaned at the feeling of someone behind him hitting him full on into a hug.

“Kurt!” Tina smiled coming around to see him. “Is this Blaine?”

“Blaine Anderson,” Blaine greeted holding his hand out to shake.

Tina forgoed his hand and hugged him. “We like him, right?” Tina asked as she pulled out of the hug and looked over him.

“We do.” Kurt confirmed and kissed Blaine lightly to prove the point.

“Kurt Hummel! What are doing with my ex-boyfriend?” Rachel laughed.

Blaine’s eyes went wide “I never dated her,” Blaine whispered to Kurt.

“I know, honey. It’s okay.” Kurt kissed Blaine’s hair.

Rachel threw herself on Kurt in a hug and then did the same to Blaine.

“You never dated Blaine,” Mercedes told Rachel.

“I did too!” Rachel insisted, “Right Blaine?”

Blaine shook his head no furiously.

“See he’s saying no.” Mercedes defended.

“She’s been insufferable.” Tina told Blaine and Kurt. “Something about test driving boys before Kurt buys.”

“It’s not worth it, Blaine,” Kurt told him gently when Blaine started glaring at Rachel.

Tina turned to just talk to Blaine. “You know you didn’t need to see if you were bisexual with Rachel, I would’ve volunteered.”

“Stop flirting with my boyfriend Tina.” Kurt warned

“What’s the puppy so mad about?” Santana asked as she walked up to them, “Did someone steal his toy? No wait, Hummel’s right there.”

Kurt rolled his eyes.

“There’s a puppy?” Brittany asked, looking around in excitement.

“She’s calling Blaine a puppy, Brit,” Kurt explained

“Blaine’s not a puppy. He’s your lobster!” Brittany said urgently

“Um, thank you?” Blaine said, unsure.

“It’s a compliment,” Quinn confirmed as she headed toward the group.

They all continued talking as they made their way to the restaurant. They were seated and Rachel insisted that everyone had to drink ‘virgin mimosas’.

“I’d like a orange juice,” Quinn told the waitress. “We all would.”

Rachel started pouting.

“Good job, Berry. If you hadn’t exposed us, we could’ve had endless mimosas.” Santana snapped.

“Where did you find my dolphin?” Britt asked curiously to Blaine.

“I-uh. Dalton?” Blaine responded looking over at Kurt to make sure he answered the question right. Kurt just shrugged.

“How did you get together?” Mercedes asked desperate for the details.

Kurt looked to Blaine. “Do you wanna or should I?”

“We basically know your side, Kurt.” Tina reasoned leaning forward in anticipation still admiring Blaine’s body.

“Well, I don’t know where to start?” Blaine stumbled

“Who’s the top?” Santana smirked.

“Um-” He looked over at Kurt for help.

“None of your business, Santana,” Kurt replied.

“Kurt then? Wanky”

“Who was attracted first?” Quinn piped up helping them away from Santana line of questions.

“Me.” They both said in unison, then laughed.

“That’s adorable.” Mercedes commented

They continued their brunch, fielding all the girls questions and teasing.

That night, Kurt officially told his family about his relationship.

Carole was thrilled for the both of them.

His father approved, but still watched Blaine closely to make sure he wasn’t pressuring Kurt into anything.

Finn waited till after dinner to say anything.

“So like- how do you, you know,” He gestured to both of them.

““No I don’t know” Kurt said giving him an unimpressed look.

“Well you’re dudes. You don’t have a girl to complicate it. You must do it a lot.” Finn explained

“Not that it’s your business, but that’s not how it works. I’d suggest you go ask my dad about it. He’ll explain.” Kurt said slightly amused.

“Why does everyone keep asking that?” Blaine asked depressingly.

“They’re idiots obsessed with sex,” Kurt comforted.

“Kurt, I need to tell you something.” Blaine said nervously.

Kurt nodded and took Blaine’s hand leading him to his room.

“Should I close the door?” Kurt asked trying to read the expression on Blaine’s face

Blaine shrugged and took a seat on Kurt’s bed. Kurt followed him, taking a seat right next to him.

Blaine took a deep breath. “I don’t think I’m ever going to be ready to do that.”

Kurt looked him carefully trying to figure out what Blaine meant.

“I don’t know if I even want to be ready.” Blaine bit his lip nervously.

“Ready for what, honey?” Kurt finally asked.

“I’ve never been attracted to anyone in that way.” Blaine tried, “And I don’t want you to be insulted, because I am very attracted to you in other ways.”

“I’m not entirely following you, Blaine.” Kurt said straightening his blanket.

“I’m not a homosexual,” Blaine whispered ashamed. “But I’m homoromantic 100%”

Kurt blinked a few times trying to comprehend.

“I think I’m asexual, Kurt,” Blaine said remorseful, “I’m open to maybe being demisexual.”

“What does that mean?” Kurt asked curiously.

“You know how you look at someone really attractive and want to have sex with them?” Blaine explained.

“No. I really don’t,” Kurt told him.

Blaine blushed hard, not knowing if he really wanted to know the answer. “Okay well have you ever fantasized about sleeping with someone?”

“I’ve fantasized about sleeping next to you?” Kurt supplied “And I told you the only time I’ve ever searched for porn, I found it horrifying.”

“Oh. Huh,” Blaine said. “Well when I was younger Cooper thought it was “helpful” to send me… racy magazines, similar to Playboy but for gay men. And I never saw the point of them.” Blaine wrinkled his nose. “Sometimes it would have interesting articles, but eventually I googled why I was uncomfortable. It lead me to this site talking about asexuality. It fits how I feel about it all.”

“So what does this mean for us?” Kurt asked, worried

“Well romantically I want to do it all. I just have no interest in sex. That doesn’t mean we can’t when you’re ready. Being asexual doesn’t take away the sex drive and I think I’d be willing to do it for you.”

“You don’t have to.” Kurt reassured. “And what you’re saying actually makes sense. I’m not exactly thrilled about sex in general. And porn just makes me feel bad for them and their families.”

“What does Demisexual mean?” Kurt asked, “You said you were open to it.”

“It means that after you have a deep emotional connection, you might develop sexual type feelings,” Blaine provided.

“I think I might be that one.” Kurt admitted, blushing, “Last year when I was deep within my crush on Finn. I might have been a little like that. But otherwise it’s never happened before.”

“I’m going to pretend I never heard that about Finn.” Blaine teased, “Or I might get a little jealous.”

“You’re my boyfriend, he never was,” Kurt told him kissing Blaine’s forehead. Blaine turned his head at the last second kissing Kurt’s lips.

“I am crazy about you, Kurt,” Blaine muttered against Kurt’s lips. Kurt grinned taking Blaine’s lower lip and sucking.

“Hey. I might be okay with this, but you know the rule, Kurt.” Burt interrupted as he walked past Kurt’s door.

Kurt and Blaine pulled away still smiling at the new part of their relationship.

“I know. No boyfriends or girlfriends in the bedrooms.” Kurt sighed, “Blaine just needed to tell me something important.”

“Uh huh,” Burt said in disbelief. “Get downstairs with Finn.”

Note: And this has been a psa about asexual/demisexual. Not actually, but it certainly felt like it as I wrote it.

As always reviews are loved and cherished.

#asexual!Blaine #demisexual!kurt #Klaine #blaine anderson #my docs #ace of diamond king of hearts

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revpauljbern · 6 years ago

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This week on Tumblr with Author and Web Pastor Paul J. Bern

A Symptom of American Implosion:

Our Broken and Rigged Voting System

by Pastor Paul J. Bern

For a website view, click here :-)

Now that the mid-term elections have come and gone, we the people – the voting electorate – have been reminded once again of two inescapable facts about America's voting system. These two facts have existed for longer than I have been alive, and I can assure you all that 63 years is plenty long enough. The first fact I'd like to state is that nearly half the country simply never makes it to the polls. In spite of the fact that there was record voter turnout for a mid-term election this time around – and that's always a good thing – still in all, only 61% of eligible voters cast ballots. Thirty-nine percent of eligible voters either didn't bother, or couldn't.

First, let me give an honorable mention to those who couldn't vote because they had to work. The vast majority of these individuals would have voted if they could, but their employment kept them from doing so. That's the nicest way I can think of to put that at the moment, but let's be realistic. The reason these workers can't take time off to go and vote is because they'd lose their jobs, or, because they make so little money as it is that losing as little as one hour's pay is more than they can bear. That, my dear readers, is an economic barrier to voting imposed on the masses by the wealthy business owners, most of whom tend to vote conservative. Working class folks, by and large, are independent or 'blue' voters who vote for 'blue' or progressive candidates. What better way for the wealthy to keep their congressional reps in Washington than to keep their employees from voting for the opposition?

On the other hand, we have those voters, the rest of the 39%, who simply don't bother. They think their vote doesn't matter, that it won't make any difference as far as fixing a broken government is concerned. So they either stay at home and play games on their computers or gaming consoles, hang out with friends and family, and a few just sit home and party all night long. I guess they must think their stupid games and their equally stupid buddies are more important than the broken world that everyone should be devoting all our time to fixing. I guess they must think it feels better to get drunk and stoned than it does to be a part of the solution, to be a part of humanity that's on the rise instead of settling for being victims of their circumstances. America is a country that's in serious trouble from a number of standpoints, and people who won't help fix America's problems make themselves little more than dead weight to the rest of us who really care. People who don't care leave holes in time.

The second fact of life that America must reconcile herself with is our election system is being gamed by the candidates on both sides, and there are many candidates who cheat and get away with it. This is nothing new – stories like this have circulated for as long as I've been alive. It is now an established fact, for example, that Bernie Sanders got cheated out of the Democratic nomination back in 2016. The local elections can be even worse. Here in Atlanta where I live, we had a case back in 2004 where a man who got elected sheriff of DeKalb county, Georgia was assassinated by a hit man hired by the opposing candidate. The loser of that election got life without parole. And just days ago, again here in Georgia, Democrat Stacy Abrams lost the governor's race to Brian Kemp, Georgia's Republican Secretary of State who waited until after the election to resign his post. That's because the Secretary of State is responsible for Georgia's elections. So Brian Kemp used his position as Georgia Secretary of State to ensure his election to the governor's mansion. Nicely done, Governor Kemp, way to shoe-horn your way into the top job in the state! Bravo (not).

To call this disheartening simply doesn't do it justice. Brian Kemp's former opponent, Stacy Abrams, has called off her campaign, but understandably refuses to concede. Accusing the governor-elect of cheating his way into office, Abrams has vowed to file a federal lawsuit charging “gross mismanagement of the entire election”. The apostle Paul wrote about circumstances similar to this during his own time. “The very fact that you have lawsuits among you means that you have been completely defeated already. Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be cheated? Instead, you yourselves cheat and do wrong, and you do this to your brothers. Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the Kingdom of God?....” (1st Corinthians 6: 7-9) In this instance, Paul wrote about lawsuits among believers, but the same logic still applies. Why not rather be the loser than to cheat and win? Why not rather be defeated in the eyes of men and women while being victorious in the presence of the Lord?

But cheating during the elections is exactly what's been going on in America for at least the last six decades or more, and the Georgia governor's race is only the latest example. If our elections are broken, the people no longer have a voice. That's the ugly truth facing Americans today. The voice of the people is being silenced, and I offer the following excerpt from Yahoo Money News, Saturday November 17th, 2018 as proof: “Sen. Cindy Hyde-Smith (R-Miss.) appeared to endorse voter suppression during a campaign stop this month, saying efforts to undermine voting among liberals at certain colleges would be a “great idea.” “And then they remind me that there’s a lot of liberal folks in those other schools who maybe we don’t want to vote,” Hyde-Smith can be heard telling a small crowd of young people outside her campaign bus in a video taken Nov. 3 and posted on online Thursday. “Maybe we want to make it just a little more difficult. And I think that’s a great idea.” Hyde-Smith, who was appointed to the Senate in April following the retirement of Thad Cochran, faces Democrat Mike Espy in a Nov. 27 runoff election. The Trump-backed Republican also came under fire last weekend for apparent racist remarks, joking with a crowd about attending a public hanging.....”

If recently-elected, or appointed, public officials are saying things like this, it makes me wonder what those who are well-established might be saying among themselves. With talk like I just documented above, there's no telling what's being said, but you can be sure it's contemptuous of working people. That's us. Because of this, the American people have a big problem on their hands. They are no longer in control of their country. The government has been in the hands of the Shadow Government, a.k.a. the Deep State, ever since the assassination of president Kennedy back in 1963. I was 8 years old when Kennedy was killed, and I still remember his assassination quite clearly even to this day. It was as traumatic back then as 9/11 was when it occurred. And the country hasn't been the same since.

We have got to figure out a way to take our country back from these Deep State operators. The prophet Zechariah mentioned this in his prophecy for Judah, one of the 12 tribes of ancient Israel. “The idols speak deceit, diviners see visions that lie; they tell dreams that are false, they give comfort in vain. Therefore the people wander like a sheep oppressed for lack of a shepherd. My anger burns against the shepherds, and I will punish the leaders; for the Lord Almighty will care for his flock, the house of Judah, and make them like a proud horse in battle.” (Zechariah 10: 2-3) Those words were written nearly 2,600 years ago. Today, the 'lost tribes of Israel' are generally viewed by many theologians as the United States, which has the world's largest population of Jewish people. So these words can be just as easily applied to the USA today as they were to the ancient Kingdom of Israel back in Zechariah's day.

“The idols speak deceit” could be considered our televisions and computers (and let's not forget all those phones), and “diviners that see visions that lie”, could be all the phony preachers and bogus televangelists who preach the Word of God for profit. We also are stuck with a crop of leaders who lead for profit, putting their own self interests ahead of the country, as well as their own constituents. “My anger burns against the shepherds, and I will punish the leaders; for the Lord Almighty will care for his flock....” I warn you all solemnly as I have before, the United States of America is coming under judgment. The outrageous mistreatment of America's citizens by our leadership in politics, business and the clergy has infuriated Almighty God. The cries of those who just barely live from paycheck to paycheck have reached his ears, and He has, I am certain, much compassion for his people who work so diligently for so little. This situation cannot continue indefinitely. At some point, something's got to give. The only question remains, will our country survive what's coming? It won't take very long to find out. Pray for America!

#the midterms #American voters #inequality #social injustice #class war

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twowritersoneblog-blog · 8 years ago

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It hadn’t even occurred to Casper that “home” for Kerry wasn’t their quaint quiet house overlooking the ocean. No, that was his quiet house now.

“What’re you doing?” said Kerry from the backseat.

“Sorry.” Casper had turned onto Stawbird Lane out of instinct. “Your mom’s, right?”

“Yeah, take Straley all the way down.”

Suddenly, he was a chauffeur, a bad Uber driver. Why had she sat in the back anyway? he thought. He looked back at her again; brake lights filled her eyes at the stop sign. It made her look foreign, but still logically familiar, the way one might anomalously forget their own face in the mirror—but logically, obviously, it’s still their face.

She forced a smile. Casper turned up the radio, and country-folk led them across town to Kerry’s mother’s apartment. He parked right by the steps, his favorite spot when they’d been dating, and helped Kerry out of the car and upstairs to 2515.

Her mother opened the door, spilling cigarette smoke into the hall. Squinty-eyed at first, and then grinny she recognized Casper. It was clearly one of her more coherent days.

“Hey Nix,” said Casper. He’d mostly appreciated being on a first-name basis with her (the times she was grounded enough to be a decent friend).

Nix’s eyebrows shot up. “You guys…back together?” She whispered the last bit toward Casper instead of Kerry. Kerry fidgeted nervously, and Casper knew she just wanted to get inside.

“Just delivery duties,” Casper said for the both of them. “Designated driver.”

“Well get the fuck in here then,” said Nix. “I just put the water on…I think.”

Nix mumbled something about girl-scout cookies, probably offering them up, as she waddled into the kitchen, adjusting her drinking kimono.

Casper collapsed into his favorite rocking chair by the old dial television, but Kerry kept to standing, edging her way out of niceties with her mother.

“Oh, nope. Burner went out again.” Nix leaned over the island before continuing: “I’ve been drinking Saké. Some of that instead?”

“That’s my bottle of Saké, mom.” Kerry folded her arms.

“No. I’m pretty sure I bought this.” Casper could see half of Nix in the kitchen, lifting up the mostly-empty bottle to examine it. He watched the doubt fill her face. “Or your brother bought it, I think.” She winced and slammed the bottle down. “That damned machine—at it again. It’s so god-awful-fucking loud. Keerrr? Did you call the landlord like I asked?”

“There’s no machine, ma, remember?” Kerry finally looked at Casper. She shook her head heatedly. “None of us can hear it. Right, Cas?”

Kerry seemed a little less patient with her mother’s delusions than usual, but Casper supposed she was tired; it had been a long day for the both of them. He mustered up a confirmation, that in fact the god-awful-fucking-machine wasn’t real.

And neither was that body in the morgue. It was a hoax of some kind, Casper was sure of it. As soon as Kerry was settled, he’d tell her about it. She’d either be quite interested or laugh it off (for months now, he couldn’t confidently expect anything from her).

Nix came into the living room and placed an embroidered blue Saké set on the coffee table. “Whatever it is,” she said, “it’s loud and needs to get the hell outta here!” She slung her hands and eyes toward the ceiling, as if that’s where it’d been coming from. “I keep telling Thad to take that ratty satellite down. We don’t use it anyhow.”

Kerry came over at long last, sat on the couch and started to pick up the Sake bottle. She hesitated and gawked at Casper: “Pour me a glass.”

“…Do you really need anymore?” said Casper, rocking smugly now in his chair. He started noticing the staticky weather reports coming through on the old television. The rain was coming.

“Mom?” Kerry said.

Casper watched as Nix sat next to her daughter on the couch and autonomously poured her a cup of Saké. Nix the Great Enabler, he thought. She wasn’t always so bad, especially when Thad was home. Casper saw the numerous paystubs from Merrick Enterprises that decorated the coffee table: all of them were addressed to Thad Blackwell, and each one touting more money than Casper would ever see.

Kerry downed her cup quickly. “Another.”

“Save some for your brother.”

“This is my bottle, ma.”

Casper sat scratching his chin, gawking at Kerry. The real Kerry, who he’d never seen act this way in front of her mother, who always offered to share her drinks. Had she really fallen off the wagon this hard? As Nix poured another for Kerry, the craziest thought sprung up in Casper’s mind. Tony had brought it up: the notion of Kerry’s twin. If memory served, Nix birthed Kerry and her younger brother Thad. Their father, Eric, lived in Orlando now with his new family. As long as Casper had known the Blackwells, it was always just the three of them. But what if it wasn’t? He watched Kerry settle into her seat, the same way she always had, damaged shoulder first. He saw her try to shake off a yawn. The real Kerry always hated the sensation of yawning. Casper was just being paranoid.

The body in the morgue is a Jane Doe. He had to remind himself. Perhaps the real Kerry had lost her wallet one drunken night. And perhaps this Jane Doe, the face of which he only saw for moments before pulling away, was much older with a different nose. Tony had only ever seen Kerry a handful of times, always while on duty; he wouldn’t know the difference. Not like Casper. Perhaps he’d go back to the morgue in the morning. Only, if the Chief caught wind of it…he had to stop thinking about work.

“When does Thad get home?” Kerry asked her mother.

“Soon…nowish.” Nix glanced at the cuckoo clock.

“Okay,” Kerry stood up, having finished the bottle. “I’ll take my leave then. I’ll be in my room. Asleep. Until he’s gone.”

Casper stood up with her.

“Sweetie, you have to see your brother eventually.”

“When he quits Merrick, we’ll talk.” Kerry looked at Casper for reassurance. Casper nodded visibly in approval, so Nix could see. She knew neither of them approved of the company he worked for, especially after the boat party.

“I know, I know,” said Nix, coughing into a new cigarette. “But what can you do? They’ve got great health insurance, and I need my meds.” She shook one of several pill bottles on the lampstand next to her.

“Well, this has been fun,” said Kerry. “I’m going to bed. Thank you, Cas. I’m very much sober now.”

“Okay, yeah,” Casper tapped the ground with the faded rim of his boot. “Ker-ber, can I just talk to you a second before I leave?”

Kerry nodded and said, “Step into my office.”

Casper followed her to the back bedroom, flashing Nix a half-smile on the way.

Kerry unlocked her bedroom door (it was dead-bolted and Casper found that very strange) and stepped inside, turning on a desk lamp.

She shut the door behind him. “What is it?”

Casper didn’t really know how to begin. I saw a body in the morgue that looked like you – she had your wallet. It all just sounded so absurd and Kerry would surely muscle out a tired laugh at this point.

But before he could try to reword it in his head, he noticed the pictures at Kerry’s desk: on a corkboard along the wall above there were several underwater photographs; Polaroids of sea kelp, sunken pieces of a ship, and dry reefs; next to the photos were copy paper print outs of several types of octopi, an old comic depicting the legendary Kraken monster attacking a ship; nestled against it was an artist rendering of what could’ve only been H.P. Lovecraft’s Cthulu. Below them were personal drawings, sketches of her own, of a mermaid woman close to Kerry’s build with a similar nose and face; a second drawing of her had her turned away to reveal what looked like tattooed black wings down her back. On the table below the corkboard were endless scribbled notes, barely legible from the doorway. But one phrase in particular stood out in all caps:

SIRENS SPARE US FROM THE FLOOD

“What is all this, Ker?”

“That’s not what you were going to ask me.” Kerry sat in her desk chair and started shuffling the papers.

“What is it?”

“Research.”

Casper scratched his face some more, fixated on Cthulu. “Okay, Ker. Is this related to the boat party? The…siren you saw?”

“Yeah, so? You don’t believe me anyway.”

Casper’s voice fell to a gravelly whisper: “You know, I don’t have to tell you that schizophrenia runs in your family.”

“No. You don’t have to tell me that.” Kerry picked up a pen and started to scribble on the corner of a closed composition book.

“Okay, sorry. I’m just saying…I hope this isn’t an obsession, like one of your mom’s things. You sure you’re okay?”

“I’m okay.”

“You promise?”

“I do. I promise.”

Casper had half a mind to pull her in for a hug, but was interrupted by the sound of the front door opening. Thad was home.

“Alright. I gotta go to sleep now, Ghostie. Thank you for today. For…helping me out or whatever.”

“You’re welcome. Always. You know that, right? Anytime.”

Kerry nodded, fought off another yawn, and made it to her bed, collapsing into a burrito, where Casper could only see her nose. It was a very distinct nose.

“Stay if you want, ” she mumbled under the covers. “With Ma and Thad. But I need to go to sleep now. Goodnight.”

“Night.” Casper took one last look at Kerry’s corkboard before shutting the light out for her. Perhaps now wasn’t a good time to tell her about the body.

And perhaps he never would.

#somnovel #shipofmoons #writing #writing exercise #zach evington #writing experiment

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