#and the fact that multiple places are trying to take away universal healthcare

[nyxcharliechaos]

Realizing I'm going to have to accept that I probably won't hear any good news relating to the LGBT community this year

[dippedanddripped]

On June 4, the Council of Fashion Designers of America released a statement along with action steps the organization would take to address racism, promote inclusivity, and create opportunities for Black talent in the fashion industry. Among the initiatives are an “in-house employment program specifically charged with placing Black talent in the fashion industry,” mentorship and internship programs pairing Black students and graduates with established companies, and a diversity and inclusion training program it would implement and make available to its members.

According to Pyer Moss founder Kerby Jean-Raymond, the CFDA still isn’t doing enough. As one of the most prominent Black members of the council, the designer isn’t afraid to speak truth to power, or use his platform to amplify the interests of the Black community. He attended the June 2 meeting where the CFDA wanted to discuss the ongoing Black Lives Matter protests and the systemic racism that has long been prevalent in the fashion industry.

He says he worked with other members of the CFDA — like Virgil Abloh, designer Prabal Gurung, and Public School’s Dao-Yi Chow — to craft a list of reasonable, actionable demands that CFDA members and its associated companies could be held accountable for. The points they outlined are as follows:

1. We’re calling on all U.S. retailers to train and instruct their employees to not make frivolous 911 calls for non-violent infractions.

2. We’re calling on all companies to not hire off-duty police officers in their retail locations.

3. We’re requiring that all CFDA affiliated companies commit to having 15% of their senior leadership staff be Black, the representation of what we are in the population.

4. We’re no longer accepting brands into the CFDA that do not meet these bare minimum standards of diversity.

5. We’re calling on all US retailers to commit 15% of their shelf space to Black-owned brands.

6. We will create a placement division with the CFDA that pairs Black talent with companies looking to hire.

7. We will be creating a program that pairs Black talent with established Black talent in the fashion industry.

Instead, the CFDA chose to ignore these requests, and released what Jean-Raymond calls a “fucking watered-down, bubblegum-ass statement that didn’t address the issues.”

In addition to creating more opportunities for Black talent, these requests specifically diminish the involvement between the fashion and retail industries with the police. The abolishment of the police force is Jean-Raymond’s most urgent objective of the moment, and talking about how to do it is the only reason he even agreed to this interview.

The outline for what a world without police looks like already exists, as multiple examples on social media have shown us. Reallocating inflated police budgets to youth programs, education, and healthcare would do more to diminish crime and create self-sustaining communities more akin to the suburbs, according to Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.

“Affluent white communities already live in a world where they choose to fund youth, health, housing etc more than they fund police,” Ocasio-Cortez explained in an Instagram Story. “White communities bend over backwards to find alternatives to incarceration for their loved ones to ‘protect their future,’ like community service or rehab or restorative measures. Why don’t we treat Black and Brown people the same way?”

It’s a sentiment that is quickly turning into action. Cities like Los Angeles and New York have vowed to cut police budgets and reallocate those funds. The Minneapolis City Council voted to dismantle its police force. Reform laws named for Eric Garner and Breonna Taylor, two Black lives lost to police brutality, have recently been passed. But Jean-Raymond knows that there’s still a long march ahead towards police abolishment, and he’s going to do everything he can to make sure no one loses sight of the goal posts.

All over the country we’re seeing states actively taking steps to dismantle police departments or reallocating budgets away from them. Broadly speaking, how do we even start working towards abolishing the police?

It’s a multi-step process, and it requires all hands on deck for it to happen quickly. There are the immediate, short-term solutions that you see with #8CantWait and Campaign Zero’s harm reduction programs that have been around forever, but it’s really a smart approach to a bigger problem.

Semantics and words matter. Seeing catchy phrases and things like that do work. We live in a meme society, and the revolution will be memed — I think it’s important for us to have a deep dive into all of these pieces that lead to the bigger solution, which is community policing, community safety, demilitarization of the police, abolishing the police,  and all of the things we can agree society needs right now.

That’s definitely something we’re seeing in how information is being spread and the Black history narratives going viral on social media.

All of these different facts are coming to light in bite-sized, tangible bits. You’re getting it in memes and people are reposting at a rate that’s dangerously fast. We’re getting a lot of historical information thrown at us that the public may have ignored before.

And I think our collective consciousness is understanding that police are trained like a cult. We just saw that in Buffalo with the older gentleman who was pushed down — 57 officers essentially turned in their resignation because they wanted to protect [their fellow cops].

This “blue wall of silence” is a proper cult. Just like MAGA is a cult, just like Kabbalah is a cult, and just like Jim Jones had a cult. One of the things that we have to look at — and why we have to disband our current police and create completely new community-serving public safety measures — is because these people are not trained to do what they were supposed to do in the first place. Something went wrong. They’re not serving their communities, they’re not living amongst the people, they’re only serving each other. Why would you become a cop just so you could protect other cops?

““These people are not trained to do what they were supposed to do. Something went wrong. They’re not serving their communities, they’re only serving each other. Why would you become a cop just so you could protect other cops?””

It’s clear that reform isn’t enough. Campaigns for police reform like #8CantWait have their fair share of criticism, but we’ve also seen laws passed in honor of Eric Garner and Breonna Taylor that ban chokeholds and no-knock warrants.

With #8CantWait specifically, their approach is to deal with the things that we can immediately address overnight. Mayors can put these things into effect. Banning chokeholds doesn’t mean that the violence is going to stop — I don’t think anybody believes that means the violence is going to stop — but with chokeholds clearly banned, it makes it a lot harder for the [police] unions and their legal defense to justify those actions. It’s an effective thing that can reduce harm to individuals almost immediately.

The common denominator is that people in power usually agree that these killings are wrong and egregious, but what we don’t talk about enough is how powerful these police unions are and these pre-negotiated collective bargaining agreements that keep police officers from facing accountability.

So ultimately, defunding the police is about taking power away from those unions?

Defunding the police is the ultimate goal, but we also have to remember that politicians and people in power have been trying to fight these police unions and these corrupt police departments all around the country forever. So it’s super important to give credit to these organizations, like Campaign Zero and the Know Your Rights campaign, who are using tactical approaches and playing chess with the system.

At the same time, we have to give credit to the people on the street who are making noise and doing whatever the fuck they need to do to get attention. We all know that America respects money, and if they fuck with somebody’s pocket, they’re going to pay attention. We need universal pressure being put on corporations and businesses that support police.

How do we keep putting that pressure on?

One of the things that we can implement specifically in fashion and retail is to no longer call the police for non-violent offenses. [George Floyd] shouldn’t have had the police called on him for a $20 counterfeit bill in the first place, especially when we know what police have done to Black men and women historically.

Speaking of accountability, you also took the CFDA to task for ignoring the list of demands you helped put together and instead issuing a statement you found totally inadequate. In many ways, these institutions continue to fail the Black community.

It’s fucking lip service to the movement, and it’s bullshit. Honestly, this is probably one of the biggest slaps in the face that I’ve ever gotten, and me and Virgil [Abloh] are going back and forth on this thing like, “What the fuck do we do?”

As far as the way that they conducted themselves and chose to omit specific language that can make Black people feel advocated for? A governing body like the CFDA holds so much prestige within the fashion space, and for them not to advocate in the proper way leads Black people to believe that there’s not going to be any help when we get here — or if we can ever get there at all.

““This is divine intervention. We got a pandemic, no distractions. We never had a movement free of distractions the way that we do now. Now all you can do is pick a side — and if you don’t pick a side, that means you picked a side.””

Not for nothing, the CFDA also has Black people in positions of power, however oftentimes these roles can be marginalized in their organizational influence.

I’m not going to speak too much on it, but what I will say is in my experience with working within these industries, the few people of color who are there are very scared to speak out, because they’re usually retaliated against in micro-aggressive ways. And I don’t blame them for not being able to speak out.

I have a privilege because I have rights to my own company, I don’t really answer to anybody — I’ve never had to — but for a lot of people, this is a new thing. Getting by and getting up is a means of survival for a lot of Black people, so I can’t fault them for showing up in spaces and not feeling like they can be their complete selves when the removal of all of their progress can be done in a swift instant.

One of the very first things you posted when the worldwide protests were gaining steam was “

Don’t get tired

.” We’re all trying to maintain this energy and sentiment as long as we can — why do you think it’s been so sustained?

The revolution needs to take naps. We went back to school, we went back to work, and if you were very outspoken about Black shit at home and how we were being mistreated by the system, then the next day, you had to take the LIRR and go into your racist, micro-aggressive office and deal with people — you got tired.

Now, this is divine intervention. We got a pandemic, no sports, no distractions, no new movies coming out, no concerts — nothing. The world has to focus on the same Black shit we’ve been trying to get done for the past several years. We never had this before. Not in the Civil Rights era, nowhere. We never had a movement free of distractions the way that we do. Now all you can do is pick a side — and if you don’t pick a side, that means you picked a side.

Jenna Wortham described this extraordinary moment as

“a glorious poetic rage.”

How does this feel different to you than what was going on in Ferguson six years ago?

We’re at a turning point in history where it’s like: Where do you want to be in this chapter? Where do you want to tell your grandkids you stood? And who do you really think is going to win? I’d bet on the winning team, if I was you.

Here’s the thing: If evil prevails, there will be no history books. In order for there to even be a history book where we’re talking about 2020, good has to win over evil before 2050. We have to accept it as a moral issue. I don’t want to liken this to other genocides and other tragedies that have happened in the course of global history, but a lot of us would feel like if we could go back and undo certain parts of human history, we would. We’re at one of those points right now. We can collectively make the change we need to make: completely dismantle the current policing system.

Only 5 percent of 911 calls are for violent crime, so why does an officer need to show up at your house with a gun? Why do you need to pull me over for a speeding ticket with a gun drawn? Why do you need to come investigate a missing child with a gun drawn? The same way you can gauge whether to send a firetruck or an ambulance, you can gauge whether to send somebody with a loaded gun or somebody with a pen and a pad.

This is a fight you’ve been engaging in through Pyer Moss for nearly a decade now, even back in 2015 with the “They Have Names” T-shirt. How do you stay so consistent and mission-driven?

Right now, I’m only lending you my likeness so that you can bring attention to defunding the police. That’s the trade-off. This is not a self-serving mission; this is something that needs to change in my lifetime. I’m terrified of bringing children into this world.

My nephew is 15 years old, and I started this fight when he was in the nut sac. He likes Odell Beckham a lot, so he dyed the top of his hair blonde, and now he has braids at the top. He likes NLE Choppa and he’s putting me onto all these young rappers that I didn’t even know existed, TikTok challenges, and things like that.

He’s stepping into adolescence, but to some random, trigger-happy cop who’s never lived in his neighborhood in Mount Vernon, who’s on their third week of the job, that little boy becomes a grown-ass threat. That story is not unique to all these mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, and grandmothers who are genuinely terrified for themselves and for everyone else just trying to conduct their normal, everyday lives. This shit is scary, and it has to stop. Anything else is not worth talking about.

““We’re in a turning point in history where it’s like: Where do you want to be in this chapter? We can collectively make the change.””

Between brands, stores, and publications, there’s certainly a renewed desire to leverage the equity of the Black community as a way to show support. But as you’ve

called out on Twitter

, there’s an egregious amount of virtue signaling and performative allyship.

I’ve remarked on it [happening] with clothing stores specifically, the ones who are now touting all these Black brands that they’ve never carried or even gone to see themselves. Magazines I’ve never even heard of are putting me in these round-ups, and it’s so disrespectful because they’re not even categorized; it’s just “Black designers.”

It’s detrimental to those who have put in the work to differentiate themselves and carve their own lanes. People who are doing really unique, gender-defying and poetic work like Telfar are being put in the same breath as a single-product DTC, venture-backed company. They’re not giving them any differentiation — just grouping them all together because they’re Black.

If they wanted to have a little bit more respect, they should admit they never supported us, and follow that up with why they’re going to start, and why you should, too. They should educate people about what we do instead of just putting us on these erroneous fucking lists. You can guilt people into buying things because we’re Black, but that can harm our businesses, because once these people feel like this “trend” is over, then they have a pass to forget about us.

[cnroth]

The Misrepresentation of Mental Disability in Star Trek: Discovery

Season two of Star Trek: Discovery has teased us for half a season with Spock having vague mental health issues and Starfleet being a big dick about his experience. In episode 8, “If Memory Serves,” we finally get an explanation for Spock’s strange behavior and see what happened when he escaped the psychiatric hospital. It is... infuriating.

The set up was bad enough, with its dangerous mentally ill person and he can’t really be mentally ill because he’s a nice person, with the gross violations of Spock’s rights and Amanda’s dreadful comment about how “‘emotional disturbance’ is code for ‘psychosis.’” It’s honestly a clusterfuck of misused terminology and harmful tropes. With episode 8 we’ve added the mental illness fake-out and when modern medicine fails try magic (telepathy), as well as another iteration of the INCREDIBLY DANGEROUS myth that psychiatric hospitals are scary places that might lock you up against your will and threaten your safety.

I can’t help but think back to the season one arc of the the only major character who had a psychiatric diagnosis last season... who also turned out to be a mental illness fake-out and was insta-cured by sci-fi magic. Looking back at this parallel, we see that the dreadful bait-and-switch representation of mental illness in season two was also used in season one, indicating that Star Trek: Discovery is not quite as progressive and inclusive as it purports itself to be.

So let’s talk about Tyler’s PTSD.

The misrepresentation of Tyler’s symptoms

According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, fifth edition (DSM-5), in order to receive a diagnosis of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder a person must experience a traumatic event that meets specific criteria (such as a life-threatening event or witnessing violence). Then, for AT LEAST A MONTH after the event, someone must experience symptoms from ALL FOUR of the following categories:

Intrusion (e.g. flashbacks or nightmares)

Avoidance (staying away from things that remind the person of the event, avoiding thoughts or feelings related to event)

Arousal and reactivity (hyper aware of surroundings, exaggerated startle response, explosive unprovoked outbursts of anger, feeling on edge, sleep disturbance)

Mood and cognition (e.g. beliefs that the trauma was one’s own fault or that they’ll never be safe again, memory disruption, loss of interest in activities or ability to feel pleasure).

Although it’s clear Tyler and Voq experienced multiple traumatic events, and we see Tyler having intrusive flashbacks and nightmares—although they were mostly used as a plot device to conveniently convey backstory and foreshadow a major plot twist—we didn’t see clear examples of all four symptom groupings. Moreover, the timeline for his symptoms isn’t clear, but if we start the clock at his escape from the prison ship, I have doubts that it was a month. (Feel free to correct me if I’m wrong.)

Now, I realize that no one directly gave Tyler the diagnosis of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. It was Admiral Cornwell who recognized his symptoms as trauma-based and said she had experience treating PTSD from her former medical practice, and she used her training to help talk Tyler through his reaction to seeing L’Rell. Still, viewers were expected to buy into this explanation so that the reveal of Tyler as Voq would be a surprise.

In short, they indicated that Tyler had Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, but they didn’t seem to do much research into what the symptoms or criteria for that disorder are. They misused terminology and exploited Tyler’s suffering for the sake of the plot. Then, they used a bait-and-switch tactic to reveal that he didn’t actually have a real-world psychiatric disorder after all, but just some fantastical sleeper agent side effects. They sold viewers on an inaccurate but compassionate representation of mental illness, then ripped that representation away from us and laughed about it all the way to the bank.

The problematic way Starfleet (and the show) handles officers with mental disorders

Tyler is suffering in season one. Clearly, he wants help, but he’s afraid that if he talks to a doctor he’ll be relieved of duty. He confides somewhat in Michael, but swears to her that he’ll get help if it becomes too much for him to handle. We later follow him on a mission to retrieve a data core with a worker bee, where seeing Klingon bodies triggers a flashback and he almost blows the mission. We, the audience, are supposed to take this as a sign that something is very wrong with Tyler and he isn’t fit for duty.

But here’s the thing: The way this story is told is discriminatory and harmful. If Starfleet were as compassionate and utopian as we’re supposed to believe, then they wouldn’t take away the thing that helps Tyler cope and stay active. Working is good for him; taking him off duty—particularly on a ship that for some stupid reason doesn’t have even one mental health professional on staff—would mean... what? What would he do to fill his time? When someone is suffering from trauma symptoms, too much spare time can be counterproductive. It can in fact be very triggering, opening up mental space for the trauma symptoms to fill. It would likely also add to Tyler’s sense of being an outsider on Discovery. His comrades are all working, but he is not.

Tyler doesn’t need to be relieved of duty. What he needs is for his commanding officer to accommodate his disability.

Out of universe, this is important because PTSD is very stigmatized in the US military, and many people fear losing security clearances or even being discharged because of such a diagnosis. The truth is that the stigma of diagnosis is much more dangerous than the diagnosis itself. Avoiding help can lead to worsening of symptoms and unexplained behaviors (such as snapping at a at a superior or avoiding certain triggering situations) that could have been excused and perhaps accommodated by having a diagnosis on record. Tyler’s situation has real world implications, and the way the show undercuts him over and over is downright harmful to real people living with this condition.

Let’s look at his mission to retrieve the data core. Now, there was really no good in-universe reason for him to be on that worker bee. He was a security officer, not a technician. Why send him instead of, say, Owosekun? The answer is that the plot demanded it. The mission was an excuse for Tyler to have another flashback, and the viewers were supposed to believe that he was messed up and unfit for duty.

But let’s say he was the ideal person for that mission. If Tyler had been receiving treatment, his doctor could write up a list of special needs he has and some accommodations Lorca could make to help him. Lorca would be legally required to fulfill those accommodations as best he could. It is not Tyler’s responsibility to bear all the weight and consequences of his disability; as the ones with more power and privilege, it is Starfleet’s job to accommodate him. So, maybe one of those accommodations could be that he doesn’t go on missions alone. If something triggers him, another officer is there to provide support.

How hard would that be to do? Answer: it’s not. Not at all. Accommodations are usually not hard to provide, but refusing to make accommodations is ableist. Unfortunately, Starfleet—the beacon of hope and progressiveness in science fiction—is unwilling to make accommodations for Ash Tyler and other personnel suffering from PTSD. They’d rather pull them from duty and put them out of sight so they won’t inconvenience anyone.

Instead of giving viewers an example of how the crew came together to support Tyler as a person suffering from trauma-based symptoms, the writers chose to put the burden of Tyler’s suffering squarely on his shoulders. With this choice, they heavily implied that people with PTSD are not capable of contributing to Starfleet and must be set aside until they’re “better.” THIS IS HARMFUL REPRESENTATION.

As someone who has personally experienced multiple mental disabilities, two of which are chronic and a third of which is trauma-based, it makes me wonder... would I have a place in Starfleet? Based on what I’ve seen in Star Trek: Discovery, my answer is no. I am not welcome to contribute to their so-called utopia.

Not at all.

If you want to support positive representations of mental disability in Star Trek, please tell them. Share this blog post on Twitter and tag their official accounts, or just tweet them your own thoughts about how their portrayals of psychiatric symptoms and healthcare are hurtful to you or your loved ones. If enough fans give them constructive feedback about this issue, they’ll listen. Thank you. Good health and stay safe.

[skylersummer]

My Secret Phobia

Until I was eighteen years old, I kept a secret from every single person in my life. I didn’t tell a soul. Had I been brave enough to take to the internet and read about my secret, I would have realised that what I was dealing with on a day to day basis was nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about, in fact it’s fairly common.

My secret? I suffer from emetophobia.

Emetophobia is the fear of vomit; either physically being sick, seeing, hearing or smelling sick will send me in to a panic attack. Anxiety UK claims that 6-7% of women and 1.7 - 3.1% men will experience emetophobia in their lifetime. Had I known earlier that this anxiety disorder existed outside of my own personal life, let alone amongst thousands of people, I am certain I would have confided in someone about my fear. There’s only a handful of information on the internet (that I’m not too scared to read) about this disorder I’ve grown up with, so I would like to share my own personal experience in the hopes that it helps those suffering in silence realise that they are not alone and to help those who don’t have it, understand the complexities of the condition. I want to keep this as trigger-free as possible, as a lot of sources I have found on the internet I’ve found far too graphic to be of any help to actual sufferers of emetophobia, but bare in mind I will be continuously using the word vomit (a word which would make me flinch and feel physically sick until recent years.)

I am not aware of any one trigger for my emetophobia, there was no obvious experience that set off this whole disorder, all I know is that I have had it for as long as I can remember, from around the age of four.  

Here’s something I want to make clear now, to those who don’t have emetophobia. It is a phobia of vomit. When I’ve told people in recent years, I’ve had some laugh at me, Of course you don’t like sick, no one likes being sick. Emetophobics don’t just ‘not like’ vomit, or being sick. Of course, it’s not pleasant for anyone and no one particularly enjoys the experience, however this is a fear. We fear it on a daily basis.

When I was younger, and suffered with more severe symptoms of anxiety, the sound of someone nearby coughing would be enough to set me off into a panic attack. I avoided school trips for fear of anyone getting travel sick on coaches and I avoided places I couldn’t easily exit in case someone did vomit. For these reasons I found school, in particular, very troublesome as there were rules and regulations - you couldn’t just leave lessons whenever you felt worried.

No one could work out exactly why I was so scared of school trips, or wanted to sit by the door in assembly or in class. Age 11 I had my first counselling session with the NHS Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS). I quickly came up with a lie, telling my psychologists that I had claustrophobia (ironically a phobia I actually gave myself), an excuse I deemed socially acceptable and far less embarrassing than the truth. I discharged myself within 6 weeks.

The fact that no one understand the root of why I was so scared of seemingly normal situations meant that no one could properly help give me the therapy that I needed, and I don’t want this to appear as a critique of CAMHS, or school, or my family who I know tried to do what they could, given the information they had.

As I joined secondary school my anxiety and panic attacks became more and more frequent. I would have to leave lessons almost every day, and would avoid the school toilets where possible.

Unfortunately one of the main symptoms that my emetophobia causes is nausea, and naturally this makes me worry even more that I will be sick. It becomes a vicious cycle.

Throughout my adolescent years I was in and out of doctors and hospitals multiple times as healthcare professionals tried to find the cause of my stomach pain and nausea. I had blood tests upon blood tests, I tried cutting out dairy, cutting out gluten, but nothing worked for me long term. The daily nausea persisted: from the moment I got out of bed to the moment I fell asleep at night.

During some of my worse periods I feared leaving the house entirely, in case I somehow became sick outside the safety of my home or in case I came into contact with someone else who was sick. I refused to go to school on a daily basis; until the age of 16 I would be dragged into school crying and screaming by my parents. By the time I was 17 and on study leave for my AS levels my school attendance had dropped below 50% and I was very depressed. My  claustrophobia had turned into agoraphobia and being home alone during study leave had me spiralling into periods of psychosis, imagining voices and seeing imaginary figures around my house.

My parents and sisters tried desperately to find the source of what we all knew was just pure anxiety. I persevered with CAMHS until an unfortunate misdiagnosis of my emetophobia as anorexia. Only recently have I started to realise how much the emetophobia affects the way I treat food. I’ve always been naturally slim but, I think, during my school years I was subconsciously eating very little, for fear of feeling too full in case it made me feel sick. Between the ages of 16-18 I had an average BMI of 13.5 which, upon discovering, doctors believed was caused by anorexia. I’ve read recently of emetophobics who’ve become hospitalised; their fear of vomiting making them too scared to eat anything at all. I only wish that the mental health professionals I dealt with at 17 had known about other atypical eating disorders instead of quickly trying to label me with anorexia, which ultimately led me never to return to them (I did a full on running-out-of-the-CAMHS-building and never looked back).

By the time I was 18 I thought I’d exhausted every way of getting better. I had heard the phrase ‘fight or flight’ in reference to my panic attacks (if you know, you know) too many times to count and I was begging for someone, anyone to figure it out, so I didn’t have to tell them. I legitimately thought my daily panic attacks were normal, and that this giant secret that was gnawing away at my insides was going to be something I dealt with my whole adult life. The thought of being stuck like this made me even more depressed and my body was struggling to keep me healthy at such a low weight - I had severe (and recurring) bronchitis during my final year of school which led to me getting post-viral fatigue; I was completely exhausted. I was so tired of being tired all the time, I really felt close to giving up.

Whilst my friends were out experiencing their adolescence as they rightly should, I was instead being picked up from parties at 9pm, too scared to drink alcohol in case it made me sick, too scared of someone else being sick from over-drinking as was so common at teenage parties - unfortunately something I couldn’t always avoid. I wouldn’t touch cigarettes as I’d heard so many people say they’d been sick after trying their first one. I couldn’t, and still can’t, go to the cinema for fear of an unexpected and graphic vomit scene, or go to fairgrounds or theme parks. I’m still petrified of flying in case myself or anyone around me is sick. I couldn’t enjoy anything a normal teenager was supposed to and I became somewhat of a recluse.

During my final year of school I was attending a private therapist with my mother and sister (I was too anxious to be alone with strangers by this point.) It was around then that I started to crack, and they began to notice how I reacted when the word ‘vomit’ was mentioned - I would immediately leave the room, crying in panic.  They’d always known I didn’t like being sick, but I don’t think anyone really knew the extent of the phobia, how it dominated my life each day.

At age 18, I was finally put on Citalopram to target my anxiety and panic disorder as well as the depression. I know that antidepressants do not work for everyone, but personally it changed my life. I’d been a shell of a person for the past 5 years, and I honestly think I would have just vanished had it not been for the medication. Alongside the relief of being honest with my family (and eventually friends) I dramatically became a fuller, happier version of myself. I finished school with three A Levels (something I am not sure anyone expected to happen only a year before) and even managed to go on holiday with my friends for a week (taking an aeroplane and even a dreaded coach!) Without the structure and pressure of school I really was a new person.

I started my Art Foundation at Oxford Brooke’s University in September 2015, and my exposure to lots of student drinking and therefore vomiting (other people’s as well as my own) dramatically helped me begin to overcome this phobia which has stolen half my life.

I’m in my final year of university now and living in London, and it hasn't been a completely smooth ride. I’ve had to switch medication twice now and I still struggle daily with public transport and the thought of being sick in public, but it’s definitely an improvement on where I was only 4 years ago, barely even living.

I still haven’t received any professional help or treatment besides my medication, for my emetophobia and that’s something I really want to do in the future, but I’m just trying to take small steps at the moment whilst I finish my degree. The thought of potentially having children (morning sickness, general kid sickness etc.) seems completely unattainable and terrifying to me, but one day I’d like to be brave enough to have the option.

I’m still recovering and I do have set backs, I’m still only just figuring out the extent of how much this phobia affects my daily life, but I do want to say that it is possible to get better. Age 11 I would have never dreamed of even telling someone about my phobia let alone be writing a public post on the internet like this, ten years later, but I think that’s probably why it’s so important that I do this. It’s not going to be easy, and I know the most obvious way forward for me is to get proper exposure therapy (gently exposing myself to sounds, television shows and movies featuring vomit etc.) but I do know for sure that I am going to beat this, one day, whatever it takes.

[justanoutlawfic]

Open Up Your Eyes: Chapt. 9

Story Summary: A toss of a coin separated not only twin brothers, but a mother from her son. Decades later, they try to find healing and strength.

Chapter Summary: Emma learns that she, her father and uncle all share a similar medical backstory.

Probably the crackiest installment to this angst fic. Based on the line from Rumple in Murder Most Foul about David and James having weak lungs. For @anotherhappybeginning, who wanted some David!Asthma Whump and for @loboselinaistrash who created the Emma has asthma headcanon.

It was no secret that while the curse would never be considered a good thing, that it had overall improved the standard of living for the Enchanted Forest and the realms it encompassed. There was free healthcare, with doctors that could provide medicine and surgery. Heck, in the Enchanted Forest, someone in David’s condition under the curse would’ve died within a few days. There was no such thing as life support back there.

 The medical practices were why David and James were separated in the first place. They were born with weak lungs, which would be defined as asthma in their current world. Despite how hard he tried, Robert hadn’t been able to afford the medicine. The king could, however, and he had arranged with Rumpelstiltskin to make them a deal. It didn’t just last that night, however. While their farm failed, whenever David would get sick (which tended to happen multiple times a winter), a vile of medicine would appear in their little cottage.

 David never quite understood how they could afford it, in fact some winters he would try to pretend he wasn’t so his mother could focus on getting them food or warm clothes. Ruth promised him that she had it taken care of, that she had an arrangement with someone, a trade of sorts. David knew how coveted medicine was, especially in their impoverished area, and wondered what of value his poor mother could have for trade.

 Little did he know, she had paid the biggest price. Her second child.

 When he went to live with George, he found out that James had the same condition and therefore, had left behind plenty of medicine. When Snow caught wind, she always found a way to get it during battle. She’d trade anything she had to, in order to keep her one true love protected.

 David Nolan had asthma, at least that’s what David’s cursed memories told him. It was in his records and many believed that when he was found unconscious, that he had been running and had an asthma attack when he passed out. Once the curse broke, David realized that he had a name for the condition, along with his cursed persona’s inhaler. He’d get it refilled as needed, but over the past few years, the need for it was slowly going away. He didn’t think he’d need it anymore.

 Until the day he found himself chasing after a troll. He wasn’t sure how one got into Storybrooke, but they had long given up questioning things by that point. With Emma and Regina, he chased after it, slowly starting to feel different. His lungs were closing up and his knees were getting weaker. He fell behind the pack, barely being able to watch his daughter use the skills she had learned from her mother to shoot it in the eyes with a bow and arrow. It collapsed to the ground, causing some trees around them to fall.

 “We better make sure he doesn’t have any friends,” Regina said.

“You take east side, Dad and I will take west. Right, Dad? Dad…” She turned to find her father kneeling on the ground, wheezing. “Dad!” She ran to his side. “Are you okay?”

“Inhaler,” he managed to choke out.

“Where’s your inhaler?” She didn’t even know that he needed one until this point.

“Truck.”

“That’s all the way at the front of the woods. We won’t make it in time…” Before she could finish her sentence, Regina had magicked the blue medical instrument into her palm. “Thanks.”

 Emma put it in her dad’s hand and held it up to his mouth, allowing him to take some puffs from it. The color returned to his face and he was soon breathing normally again. Emma finally allowed herself to breathe.

 “Jesus, I’m the kid, I should be scaring you,” she only half-joked.

David partially smiled. “Sorry, kiddo. I’m fine now.”

“I didn’t know you had asthma.”

“James and I were born with weak lungs, both of us developed it, though of course they didn’t call it that where we’re from. Thanks to Regina’s healthcare, I ended up getting a proper diagnosis and inhaler under the curse.” He smiled over at her.

Regina chuckled. “Well, you can thank me for my universal healthcare later. For now, we need to make sure there are no more trolls.”

David allowed Emma to help him up. “Alright, let’s go.”

“Oh no, not you. You’ve got a mommy now and if I let you run around town after that, she’ll have my head on a spike.”

“Regina! I’m a father now.”

“Yeah and I’m a mother, doesn’t mean I’m also not a daughter. I’ll call Zelena and ask her for help with this. Emma, take the village idiot home.”

 Emma snorted a bit, but lead her father off to his truck, despite his protests. She took the keys from him and gave him a look when he tried to give her lip over it.

 “Geez, you do remember I am your dad, right?” David grumbled as he climbed into the passenger seat.

“Yeah, and if this were me with my asthma, you’d be having a field day.”

“You have asthma?”

Emma’s hand paused as she stuck the key into the engine. “Um…no.”

“Emma!”

“Well, now we know where I got it from.”

“I’m telling your mother.”

“Fine, I carry my inhaler on me like a sane person, though.” She patted her jacket pocket.

“I can’t believe you never told us.”

Emma shrugged. “Never came up. You never told me about yours.”

“Can we stop having secrets?”

“Yes. Now come on, let’s get you home.”

 Emma drove the truck back to the farmhouse and David followed her inside to the living room, where they found James laying on the couch, being fussed over by Ruth.

“What happened here?” Emma asked.

“She’s overreacting,” James said.

“I am not. You had an asthma attack,” Ruth interjected. “You should’ve known better than to agree to unpack those dusty books.”

“Well, idiocy runs through the family,” Emma jerked her thumb to David. “This one ran after a troll without his inhaler.”

Ruth’s eyes widened. “You did what?”

“Mother, I’m fine…” David tried to explain.

“On the other couch, now.”

“Mother…”

“David, I swear.”

 She fixed him with a look that even Emma had seen before, but it made her grown father look a little scared. He went to the loveseat and laid down on it, obediently. Emma had to smile to herself. Having her grandmother around could be fun sometimes.

 “Emma Ruth Swan!”

 Oh, that did not sound good. Emma turned around to find her mother standing there, not looking very happy.

 “You have asthma?!?”

“What…how did you…”

“Your father texted me.”

“Well, he didn’t have his inhaler on him!”

“Yes, and it seems Ruth has taken care of that. You, however,” Snow walked over to her. “Need to sit down and relax yourself. You shouldn’t be chasing after trolls.”

“I had my inhaler on me.”

“Emma.”

 With that voice, Emma knew not to mess with her mother. She dropped down in the armchair and folded her arms over her chest. She, James and her father shared the same look.

 You don’t mess with mothers. Ever.

[baddasshistoricalmadams]

Elizabeth Blackwell

Medicine woman.

Birth: February 3, 1821                      Death: May 31, 1910

Women have been a longstanding part of healthcare in history. From wise women who offered remedies in the home made from herbs and salves to women who delivered babies in the home. Despite the services they offered, women were not allowed to enter universities or guilds to take formal education to be recognised medical practitioners. Wise women would see themselves be labelled as witches, those who delivered babies would find men gradually replacing them in their craft and soon only those with recognised medical certification were able to practise medicine. New medical journals written would soon begin to dismiss the old herbal remedies and traditional folklore medicine as old wives tales thus removing any legitimacy that it may have had.

In nursing is where women found a inlet into medicine. In the late 1700′s, reform began to emerge from various other civil areas that saw change. Institutions for training nurses began to emerge, the Deaconess Institute at Kaiserworth in Germany (1836) would inspire Florence Nightingale who would go on to reform army hospital standards during the Crimean war and Mary Seacole would set up her own nursing home on the front line. Nursing began to be seen as a respectable course of career for a young woman though for some it might have been seen as still closed to young women of colour or of the lower classes. Nursing was seen as a natural extension of a women’s attribute, a caring and nurturing role that women easily slotted into but the idea of women becoming trained physicians was not an open subject. Not to say that women did not try, Margeret Ann Buckley enjoyed a successful medical career as James Barry and their secret was only discovered when they died from dysentery. 

Elizabeth Blackwell was born in Bristol, England to a large and prosperous family, her father, Samuel Blackwell would move them to America in 1832 to take up residency in New York where he would become involved in the abolitionist movement. Elizabeth benefitted from private tutelage from an early age but her family would fall from wealth as her fathers business practises did not do well in the states and ultimately he would pass away in Cincinatti, Ohio. His daughters, Elizabeth, her mother and her sisters would go on to open a private school to make ends meet and would go on to teach in Kentucky and later in North and South Carolina. Elizabeth’s family were very progressive for the times, her brother Henry was a well known abolitionist and suffragist, her sister Emily would follow her into medicine and her sister in law became an ordained female minister. 

it was during the latter years of her teaching career that Blackwell would began reading medical journals. She would claim that her interest came at the experience of a terminally ill, close friend who stated that had her physician been female: it is likely her fate would have been much different. Elizabeth would apply to multiple medical colleges but ultimately was denied by all but one. Her application to Geneva eventually would be accepted. The board did not think that the all male student body would approve of the admittance of a woman into their ranks and thus put it to a vote. If one member of the student body voted no; Elizabeth Blackwell would be denied a place at the university. Unanimously the vote was a yes and Elizabeth was admitted. By what virtue did all 150 members vote in her favour?

Allegedly they thought it was a joke or an exercise.

Nevertheless the board wrote to Blackwell upon her acceptance;

“A quorum of the faculty assembled last evening for the first time during the session, and it was thought important to submit your proposal to the class (of students), who have had a meeting this day, and acted entirely on their own behalf, without any interference on the part of the faculty. I send you the result of their deliberations, and need only add that there are no fears but that you can, by judicious management, not only disarm criticism but elevate yourself without detracting in the least from the dignity of the profession.”

Despite a resolution that no conduct of the University would be detrimental to Blackwell's career, she nevertheless encountered resistance and difficulty upon her admittance. When discovered that her application was indeed serious, she was met with horror from the public and was even restricted from attending medical demonstrations. She was asked to leave operating theatres, advised to avoid a lecture on medical anatomy and many patients reacted poorly to her presence. She recounted in her biography that wives of doctors would not speak to her and often other ladies would stare at her with curiosity. However some noted that fellow students became quite friendly after a time and even some of the more uncouth students appeared to tighten their bootstraps and become more studious.

Elizabeth would graduate first in her class in 1849 with an MD; writing her doctoral thesis on Typhus fever. She would return to Europe and work for some time in the maternity sector and sadly would contract an illness that would leave her blind in one eye. Because of this, she gave up on the idea of becoming a surgeon. Nevertheless she eventually returned to practise in New York and faced further prejudice in her attempts to open up a practise. Hospitals and dispensaries ultimately refused her associated. Landlords would refuse to rent practise space to her so eventually she bought a house and set up a practise where she would see mainly women and children. During this period she would also go onto write and publish lectures on health including The Laws of Life; with Special Reference to the Physical Education of Girls. 

In 1853, she would open a dispensary in the slums alongside her newly qualified sister and Dr Marie Zakrewska, a polish doctor whom Blackwell had encouraged to continue her studies. Emily Blackwell, her younger sister became the third women to qualify in America. Leading medical practitioners would go onto to aid the practise as well. In her personal life, it was during this time that Elizabeth chose to adopt a child as she had chosen to never marry. Katherine ‘Kitty’  Barry and Elizabeth remained close friends into Blackwell’s old age. Eventually the dispensary would be incorporated into the New York Women’s and children infirmary by the sisters and Dr Zakreska who would later leave to continue her career in Boston. Towards the end of the 1850′s, Elizabeth would go on to tour Britain lecturing on medicine, many women would go onto be inspired by Elizabeth’s pursuit of a medical career and Elizabeth would be the first woman to have her name on the British Medical register. During the civil war they would aid in the organisation of Womens central organisation of relief which selected and trained nurses  for service in war.

Elizabeth would also meet Florence Nightingale, with her sister Emily as well; they would open the Women’s medical college at the infirmary which Elizabeth would be the Chair of Hygiene for a number of years but would directly guide the college herself. In 1875, Elizabeth was appointed the professor of gynaecology at the London School of Medicine for Women which had been founded by a fellow female doctor, Elizabeth Garrett Anderson. She would retain this position until she retired in 1907 due to a bad fall she had sustained and later in 1910, she would pass away in her home in Hastings. Elizabeth Blackwell is generally labelled as the first female doctor in America and certainly was a visionary in medicine and helped lead the charge of women entering the profession. Certainly after two world wars, more opened up to the idea of women entering the medical profession as the need for more medical staff arose. The influence of the first wave of female doctors is certainly felt, in 1881 there were 25 female doctors but by 1925; there were approximately 425. Elizabeth fought for her career and certainly earned the respect - albeit sometimes begrudging- respecting of her male peers and the acceptance of women in the profession.

Stuff:

http://broughttolife.sciencemuseum.org.uk/broughttolife/themes/practisingmedicine/women

https://www.medicaldaily.com/most-influential-women-medicine-past-present-270560

https://www.womenshistory.org/education-resources/biographies/elizabeth-blackwell

http://time.com/5131961/elizabeth-blackwell-facts/

https://www.britannica.com/biography/Elizabeth-Blackwell

https://cfmedicine.nlm.nih.gov/physicians/biography_35.html

https://www.thoughtco.com/elizabeth-blackwell-biography-3528555

https://www.biography.com/people/elizabeth-blackwell-9214198

http://www.bristol.ac.uk/blackwell/about/elizabeth-blackwell/elizabeth-blackwell-biography/

[thegirlwhocouldntsitdown-blog]

12 months - I have lived in Los Angeles for A WHOLE YEAR?! (16.08.2018)

One year. Wow.

A year ago today, I left my family and 3 of my best friends at the airport and said goodbye, not knowing how long it would be until I saw them again.

I am incredibly lucky to have seen some of them in the time that I’ve been here - I can’t believe I have such incredible people in my life who love me enough to come all the way here and give me some cuddles. Those people truly don’t know how much that has impacted my time here. In certain moments, it’s been so goddamn difficult to be away from Melbourne. The food is better, the air is cleaner, the healthcare is FREE and GOOD, we have TRAMS AND TRAINS EVERYWHERE(!!!), my house has a BACK YARD, I lived 30 minutes from EVERYTHING. I never understood how lucky I was to grow up in the worlds most liveable city (apparently we were overthrown this week - not happy, Jan).

Honestly, I get when people from the U.S ask me “Why would you move here?! Australia is so much better!” They’re right. But, I cannot thank the people I’ve met here enough either. It turns out, being in a place doesn’t matter - it’s the people you meet there. I think I knew that to an extent, but knowing the amazing human beings I know is the best thing about my life. Both in LA and in Melbourne, I have communities of such immensely supportive, determined, understanding, encouraging, KIND KIND KIND friends and family. Lots of people tell me they could never move away from home like I have, and I absolutely get that. I really don’t think I could have if not for my loved ones - because I am who they’ve made me.

If not for their strength and guidance, I would have no one to tell me to keep trying. If not for their positivity and resilience, I would probably be hiding in bed. If not for their perseverance and diligence, I would probably break down every 10 minutes. Granted, I have done all of those things at certain times in my life - both in Melbourne and LA - but my family and friends are the reason I haven’t let those moments solidify me in a state of bitterness and stillness. They keep me moving, trying/failing/getting up again, believing in myself.

In the last month, I have had not a great time. I still haven’t found a job to keep me here and grant me an E3 visa. I have found out some pretty troubling information about my health (explained in the “Pain” section). I have found myself forgetting who I am and why I’m here. But these people - my friends at home who I haven’t seen in a whole year, my family who I talk to every day, my community of new and old pals here in LA - have reminded me that I am capable, I am smart and I am kind. These are three things that cannot be said about everyone, and holding on to them has made me feel a lot better about whatever may come in the future.

So, over the past month I’ve had a lot of lovely moments amidst the scary ones.

The Spy Who Dumped Me came out in cinemas. My name was on the screen in the credits and it was a big moment. I was so lucky to have my beautiful pals Kelsey, Shannon, Savannah and Nathalie with me to share that moment. Below is the cake from the release party, and me dressed as an “Australian tourist” in the movie (go see it to undertand.

Disneyland boi.

Kelsey has been such an incredible friend to me for the last five years and this month has been especially challenging for me, and she has been so goddamn wonderful and kind. I love her a lot and this is her with a bloody OSCAR and then us having some bevs.

BEACH DAY WITH PALS! Molly and Josh are here, I LOVE MY IMPROV PALS!!!

I never go clubbing anymore, but my pals Jordy and Kristen asked us to come out with them to a 90′s night in Silverlake at a place called The Satellite and it was THE MOST I’VE EVER DANCED OR SWEATED EVER AND IT WAS THE MOST FUN I’VE EVER HAD IN A LARGE GROUP OF PEOPLE!

HANSON WAS PLAYING WHEN WE WALKED IN AND I SCREAMED AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS. ALSO THEY HAD “SO FETCH” BALLOONS AND I STOLE ONE AND DANCED WITH IT ALL NIGHT, HEHE.

My sweet Joeboy McGee turned 24 and I feel so grateful to have spent the second birthday in 3 years with him (on his 22nd birthday we saw stand up in NYC and got fancy pasta, it was beautiful). I love you so much, Joey. Thank the universe (and your amazing parents) for bringing you to life.

Sweet angel Tiana joined Molly and I in LA for a few days and it was like a mini Heralayan Salt Lamps reunion. They’re both hilarious and intelligent goddesses and I’m so glad I know them.

And right now, you ask? Well, today is just a normal day. I went to the gym and am about to go do a shift at Massage Envy. I can’t believe it’s been a year, and I’m so grateful to be able to say I’m living in Los Angeles.

TRAVEL: 5/10

While I’ve been winding down from having so many people visiting, I’m also really anxious about the whole “when am I coming home?” thing. Basically, I can’t know when I come home until I do or don’t get a job. 

My visa ends at the end of September, so if by this time next month, I still don’t have a job, I’ll be coming home for 3-4 weeks to visit, then returning to LA until I run out of money/my lease is up (mid December). If that happens, then I’ll be back home until I can figure out a way to come back and continue working in film and television. If I DO find a job in the next month, however, I will have to come home for 2 weeks to get my visa reinstated, in which case I’ll be back to LA as soon as I can be, and then return home for Christmas/New Years/Elyse’s wedding in late December/early January.

Apart from that, I’ve been going to the beach a lot and trying to just enjoy being here. I have a nice tan!

PAIN: 2/10

At the eye appointment with my parents, after 6 hours of weird tests and scary waiting periods, I was asked to come back to do another scary test - nay, the SCARIEST test. I had to have an ERG (info here), which is basically a test to see if there’s something wrong with my retina. After that, it determined my eyes were aye okay (yay!) but something weird has still been happening. I am currently awaiting an MRI of the brain, because the specialist believes I have “pseudotumor cerebri” (info here) . Basically, they think there’s excess fluid on my brain which causes pressure on your optic nerve, causing your vision to change and excess headaches. I genuinely thought everyone got headaches every day and that my sinuses were just weird (which is true, they’re weird), but there may be something more serious going on. It’s not a life threatening condition, but if it’s severe enough, there can some times be draining of the brain needed and even sometimes surgery. My vision isn’t changing too much, the only reason I noticed the changes was because I was on the look out for them since starting my arthritis drug, Plaquenil - I stopped taking it in April because I noticed these vision changes from February.

I’m really scared because if the MRI doesn’t give us enough info, the doctor will have to order a spinal tap (no, not the mockumentary - although this news DID turn my anxiety “up to 11″). Now, I’ve had multiple epidurals and minor back surgery, so I’m not too afraid of a spinal tap, but I AM afraid of the fact that my insurance here runs out on the 30th of September. This may be a reason I have to come home and stay home, and that terrifies me beyond anything else. I don’t want to have my body turn on me again like it has with my arthritis and my back pain. I do so much to keep myself healthy and to give my body the rest it needs, but if I have to put my future on hold for my health, I’m not sure how long I’ll be able to handle that fact without becoming a miserable wreck. All I can do for now is hope it’s nothing too serious and I can get it sorted out soon. Keep your fingers and toes crossed for me.

COMEDY: 7/10

This weekend Joey, Jordy and I will debut our threeprov improv team on a goddamn PARTY BUS for the LA Indie Improv Festival. I haven’t been writing at all for a very long time and that has been a big part of my recent slump, but in the last few days I’ve had a wave of ideas and energy come back to me and I really feel so excited to dig into something. I love making stuff.

On the downside, I have been extremely anxious about if I will be able to continue working here. I know that if it’s meant to be, it’ll happen, but for a while I’ve felt so so pessimistic and afraid of going home and not being able to continue towards my goals. All I’ve ever wanted to do since I knew what a joke was was be in comedy and work in TV - there’s nothing I love more (except my family, I know, I know). Yesterday, I had a meeting with a woman a friend set me up with. Both the woman and my friend who introduced us are both incredibly successful, kind, funny and passionate women. One of them said to me a few years ago:

“All you need to do to be a writer is two things: 1. Keep writing, don’t give up. 2. Don’t be a dick.”

Yesterday, in my conversation with her friend, she told me two things: “1. Stop worrying. 2. Be nice to people 3. Work fucking hard. 4. STOP. WORRYING”

It was the most relieving thing to be told by two different women, who are slightly older and wiser than me, who have been exactly where I am now, that I will be okay. They both believe in my ability and my personality and my work ethic, and that proves more than they realise it does. I have this incredible network of strong, generous, talented women around me - both here and in LA - who believe in me. So if these highly skilled and experienced people do, why shouldn’t I?

I’ll get there, even if a fucking visa or a few thousand health issues get in my way. It’s what I was born to do.

A year has passed and I’m a bit different, but I’m pretty much the same. The only difference may be that I know what I’m worth now. Oh, and I know how to grow string beans!

[sea-lilli]

Setting the Stage: Guadalupe

Guadalupe was another mom-type friend, but one who was tough as nails. She was protective of her own, though, and intensely loyal. Upon the divorce announcement, she immediately tried to become extra supportive: she knew I was feeling down, and she compensated. She believed me when I told her I had started seeing my dead ex boyfriend around, and the manifestation of all my other gifts. She tried to help me by looking up other people with gifts, though she didn’t really follow through because I wasn’t so enthusiastic. She let me borrow her family. 

She was also extremely controlling, though again, out of love. Ruth and her shared this trait, though Guadalupe was on the extreme side and Ruth’s controlling tended toward her mom- much more manageable. I saw a pattern in these types of mom friends, and I wondered if it was a reflection of my own relationship with my own mother, but I couldn’t work it out, because all the other stuff was so much. I think I’ll try to process this with my art at a later time. I don’t know yet, if I will post it on this blog, as I don’t want to be identified. But I don’t know yet.

Anyway, I was still jobless two months after the divorce was announced. Because of my public shaming, I had guaranteed income from Solomon though, $200/ week through our actual divorce-set for January, which was enough to manage my expenses. And I had some leeway, because it was only about May.

I was driving out to the university library everyday and applying for jobs for a few hours, but also making an incredible amount of art to deal with the Big Feelings I was having. I was documenting the art straight away on Instagram, and I started getting really popular there, because people were already stalking my page for divorce updates. My art dealt with all the intense emotions. 

I learned I could literally trap my emotions in my art: since it’s more therapy and communication than art, people could easily pick up what I was putting down. And the intensity of the emotions I was expressing scared them, and they tried to get me to tone it down. People thought I was falling apart; I was really just taking advantage of a shitty time in my life, because I knew this was the only way I could ever turn it into a positive.

I took my dog with me everywhere I went, as I had been training him to be a service dog. I guess it looked like I was just having fun with my dog to Guadalupe. I’d also started up swimming, and was having a lot of fun with that, and focusing on that in my conversations with her. I was training my brain to think positively, and she didn’t get it because she wasn’t on my level. 

I had met Guadalupe in a call center in 2012, and she supported me trying to find work elsewhere: she knew firsthand how draining that line of work is. It was especially hard for me, being such a high level empath, though I didn’t know that at the time.

People don’t realize how hard it is to get one in a big city, because you have to compete with multiple people for the same job—except at a call center. Anybody can get hired at a call center, because it’s a horrible job.

Guadalupe was extremely judgmental regarding my lack of success in finding a job. She was involved in a seven year or so unhealthy on-off relationship and had just broken up with him for the millionth time. 

She did this in solidarity with me, I think, to help me not be alone—but also, because she didn’t want to be alone herself. I think she needed that support to not be actually on her own, and she had started moving away from her family emotionally (still very enmeshed, though). She wanted to instantly replace parts of his role (talking, sharing, growing) with me, and for me to do the same with her and Solomon. It wasn’t healthy, and I resisted, but also was simultaneously drawn to her: she loved me hard, and she believed in me fiercely and it was exactly what I needed.

Her coping strategy was the typical “make money, hustle” badass bitch mindset: by throwing herself into work and making money, she didn’t have to feel her feelings, I guess. She didn’t know there was another way. It scared her that I had such intense feelings, I think, because she had intense feelings too, and they can really feel out of control at times. It also scared her to be alone.

However, having intense emotions doesn’t mean you have to let them rule you. I know it seemed like that is what I was doing, but really, I was just feeling my feelings, so that I could heal faster. And I knew this, intrinsically. An emotional period in one’s life does not mean that emotions rule you. It is a cycle.

When I went to the crisis center, it triggered her even more: to have such a strong, healthy friend go to such a place for “unhealthy” people. Especially since she has a sister who often goes due to schizophrenia, and sometimes (from Guadalupe’s perspective), it borders into her sister just going there for social times, because she’s “being dramatic.” And I see it, halfway. She calls the police to come and escort her, again and again and again. But I also know that she has a diagnosis for schizophrenia, and this can cause one to feel isolated and alone and like reaching out. It’s not my experience, so I don’t judge. I’m just happy she has the healthcare to support it.

It has been culturally baked into Guadalupe to have that unhealthy viewpoint, and reinforced through her sister to not accept the people who go to that place, because they are just “being dramatic.”

It also was hard for her, because she really, truly fully believed me when I stated that I was healed from depression, and she was confused because soon after I had healed, I had to go there. She didn’t realize that just because I am not diagnosabley depressed anymore, doesn’t mean I still won’t have those dark thoughts during rough times. And it was an incredibly rough time! A lot was happening, all at once. The fact that I reached out during crisis is something to be commended, not ashamed about.

So it set us up for a long and awkward adjustment period, where our friendship had to adapt to my new level of healthiness.

[wtfallonauthor-blog]

Obviously, this is satire. I am not using the White House microwave to eavesdrop on the president scrawling his speech in crayon.

Congratulations to all of you who get to hear the best State of the Union address ever…since last year. I know those of you at home are enjoying it too, because your TV is spying on you. And if not your TV, then your microwave.

First, I want to tell you the state of the Union is great, because I am making America great again! BUT, we still have much to fear, because there are caravans of people from all over the world and maybe even Mars… and a couple parallel universes, see why we need Space Force…  everywhere coming to take what’s ours!

There are so many people to fear, I don’t know where to start—oh wait, yes, I do, yes I do. The gravest threat facing our country today is poor people! You know they’re all out to take your hard-earned money. Not mine, because I store mine offshore, but definitely all of yours. Do you know most poor people work multiple jobs? Where do you think those jobs come from? They come from you, and then you don’t have any money!

State of the Union Leaked Draft

And then those nasty poor people want welfare, folks, they want welfare, even though they’ve taken jobs from the good, hardworking people like you, they still want welfare. Can you believe that? They want free healthcare, free college, a free place to live—who do they think they are, my family?

Then, once they’ve taken all your money, they want to raise the minimum wage. Don’t they know how hard life is for CEOs and shareholders these days? Don’t they know raising the minimum wage to fifteen dollars an hour will force big companies to blame their regular price increases on a higher minimum wage? Don’t they know the damage to our economy when a CEO is forced to limit himself to only five summer homes in the Hamptons? It’s an absolute disaster!

And you know what’s an even bigger disaster than our own citizens robbing the rich? Foreigners. Foreigners who are out to take those high-paying jobs available to everyone with a first grade education in this great country! Foreigners who want to take welfare from the poor mooches who were lucky enough to be born in this great country. Let me tell you, those illegals will rob our poor of every dime they just fleeced from the rich, before they can even spend it on beer and cigarettes. Then they’ll start committing serious crimes—coming after the rich!

There’s another big threat facing this country too: Women. It’s a scary time to be a man, guys, because these days you can’t harass women anymore without them getting all sensitive and snowflakey about it. Can you believe it, now women you don’t even know want you to ask permission before you grab ’em by the pussy? Why do they hate men?

Getting back to pussies, have I mentioned I’m taller than Obama? And I had a bigger crowd at my inauguration? You wouldn’t believe the crowd size! Everyone wanted to see me make America great again.

And I have, but we can’t forget all the threats facing us. We can’t forget the threat of the well-educated. The well-educated are scary because they’re always trying to confuse good, honest, Americans with annoying things like “facts”‘, and I don’t mean the good, safe, alternative kind. The scientists are especially dangerous. Do you know they’ve formed a cabal and created the hoax of global warming? Well, the Chinese helped, but mostly, it was the scientists, folks. It was the scientists. If those people have their way, they’re going to put solar panels on everything, and then how will I get a tan after we use up all the sun running our electricity? Fortunately, my Secretary of Donation Education, Betsy DeVos, is working tirelessly to ensure American students are educated properly on the scourge of environmental hoaxes like climate change. She’s asked me to remind our young viewers to think logically: How can the globe be warming up when the Earth is flat?

As if the scientists aren’t bad enough, then we have LGBT people. Make no mistake, they have an agenda to convert everyone to their sexual preferences. Remember back when America was great, you could turn on the TV and see only straight people kissing each other. Back then, we didn’t have gay people or transgender people or arguments about who used what bathroom. There were no gay people until the gays invaded the media!

It gets worse, it gets worse. Then there are the foreign threats. Mexico is sending rapists and murderers, and Canada is trying to steal our citizens by dangling the carrot of free healthcare. And Norway refuses to send us any more limmigrants because they claim most of their citizens don’t want to move here—even though I’m making America great again! And don’t even get me started on all the people from shithole countries who want to come here and get on welfare, shaking our poor billionaires down worse than our own poor, lazy citizens already have. It’s a disgrace, an absolute disgrace.

And don’t forget, there are the young liberals, like Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, who want to turn America into a shithole country like Venezuela. First of all, our oil reserve is bigger than Venezuela’s, much bigger. Second…has anybody seen her birth certificate? Where was she born? How about that Robert Mueller guy, anyone seen his birth certificate? Just curious…and fourth, liberals are all communists, and they want us all standing in line for toilet paper and vodka, and don’t you forget it!

You know why the liberals are doing this? Because they want to give everyone free stuff. It’s like on Oprah. You know I have better ratings than Oprah? I have better ratings. And I never gave away free stuff on my TV show. Better ratings than Swarzennager too. Anyway, free stuff. You get a car, and you get healthcare, and what do the rich get? They get all their tax breaks mercilessly ripped away, and that’s just not right. It’s not right, folks, it’s not right. Billionaires should not have to pay taxes, because they earned their money. Me, for example. I earned my money the day I was born into it, and I’ve been earning it ever since. And I’ve never stopped working for other billionaires like myself, good, hardworking people who only want to preserve the fortunes they earned by being born into the right family, growing up, going bankrupt going to bed with hot supermodels to Wharton, and hosting the most popular TV show that even got better ratings than Oprah, Swarzennager, and Hillary Clinton!

But don’t worry folks, there is a solution here. There’s a way I can protect you from all this pain and misery. Simply donate to my reelection campaign! You can pay online by credit card, or mail a check directly to the Kremlin. Thank you for hearing the greatest speech in history, until next year.

***********************************************************************

V. R. Craft is the author of Stupid Humans, a science fiction book series that asks the question, “What if all the intelligent humans abandoned Earth—and we’re what’s left? She is also the author of the political satire, Fail to the Chief, in which she envisioned the presidential election as a reality show. More of a reality show….

  State of the Union Leaked Draft Obviously, this is satire. I am not using the White House microwave to eavesdrop on the president scrawling his speech in crayon.

[badly-drawn-piplup]

Happiness Overload Chapter Ten

I walked up to the fridge and peered at its contents. There appeared to be moldy food and nothing at all appetizing. I had just woken up. From the corner of my bed, I could hear the alarm clock on my phone going off. The alarm, for some reason, went to radio, and I had yet to bother to turn it off. It sounded like some right-wing conspiracy theorist yelling nonsense in a Texan accent.

″THERE ARE GAY FROGS, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! DON'T BELIEVE ME? I SAW TWO LESBIAN FROGS HOLDING HANDS! WELL GUESS WHAT, GLOBAL ELITES? I WON'T STAND FOR IT! I HAVE HETEROSEXUAL FROGS IN MY BACKYARD AND THEY HAVE STRAIGHT SEX EVERY DAY! I FILM IT! AS PROOF, EVIDENCE, FOOTAGE! NO ONE'S GOING TO TAKE MY FROG SEX TAPES AWAY FROM ME! NOT THE GOVERNMENT, NOT BIG PHARMA, NOT PETA, NOT EVEN MY EX-WIFE!″

I groaned and turned my alarm off. I didn't even know why it went to that station in particular.

I went back to the fridge and groaned again. I should have known better. Well, I knew better. That's just what happens when you consistently go out and eat Chinese when you should be eating the groceries you bought the other week. I started shoveling the food into a garbage bag. I hated doing this. Wasting so much food. But some things needed to be done. I just told myself that I wouldn't make a habit out of it.

How many times have I told myself that, though?

I opened the door to my apartment and was met by a bright, cloudy day. Any minute it might rain. Rain can be a good thing. Some would consider the way it rained on a whim in the city as a charm of sorts. I couldn't disagree, although what sort of charm was up for debate.

All around me were smiling faces. Some off to work, some coming home from work. Some just enjoying a morning walk. It was nice to see so many people in such high spirits, even if there didn't seem to be much reason to be. Well, there were a few reasons to be.

It's been three years since the elevators at the station were first installed. During those three years, improvements were made, said to make things safer for passengers. Now multiple people could board and each of them would be taken their desired destination. Not only that, but such elevators, now dubbed ″ETNAvators″ could be found in almost every major city across the United States, with plans in a year to go international. Who knew that a teleporter would be so successful?

As far as I was aware, we were living in the good future science fiction novels had foretold. Crime was at an all time low, universal healthcare was finally put into place, everyone's student loan debt in college was paid off in full (as well as universities becoming tuition free), the minimum wage was raised to reflect inflation, and a law was reinstated that made pizza delivery services abide by the edict of 'thirty minutes or less or it's free'. To think that it was only three years ago that I was part of a team trying to stop the corporation making this all possible, ETNA.

Not much was known about the company, but honestly, when they were doing such good work, did anyone really care? I certainly didn't, but I was sure someone did. If the mysterious figure, Conrad, was still lurking, he may have still been trying to figure out how to stop them. But if he hadn't done anything yet, he probably wasn't going to do anything in the near future. I still recall gathering information with he and Velvet, another mysterious person I had no desire to learn anything about. I hoped that they were safe, but was also relieved that it was no longer my problem.

Just three years prior, in the midst of the pursuit between some nasty officers and I, someone in an alleyway caught my gaze; his thin, long legs stood like crooked stilts and he wore a baseball bat. He was laughing and peering out.

He's laughing at you, a thought appeared.

You have to chase him down, beat him up, another one showed up.

I'm trying not to get shot, this really isn't the time! I yelled at my own thoughts.

The thoughts wouldn't stop, almost as if they weren't my own. Call me a sucker, but I gave in to them when I was still running and noticed the same man in another alleyway. I darted toward the alleyway, ready to tackle him.

Instead what occurred was him grabbing me. I hit his chest in protest, but he didn't even flinch. He was much stronger than he appeared to be, his body resembling a stick-bug and not someone with such a heavy build.

″Hey! Put me down!″ I yelled, continuing to pound my fists against his chest and kicking his back.

He didn't. He did laugh, however.

″You'd rather be shot dead right now, eh?″ He chirped, his voice actually soft spoken and polite. His voice reminded me of an Irish folk singer. ″Way I see it, you ought to be thanking me right now,″ he added.

He skipped along, as if the weight on his shoulder meant nothing. I bobbed up and down, feeling as if at any moment I would throw up.

...And then the moment came. Vomit shot up my throat and spilled from my mouth, landing on the stick-man's pinstripe suit.

″Oh lordy, I just got that dry cleaned, too!″ He looked down, his voice betraying him as he didn't sound all that concerned. I was feeling real dizzy and there was but a singular thought running through my head:

The fuck is a dry clean?

I felt a nudge against the side of my stomach. I awoke on a cold, granite floor. I looked up and saw the stick-man (or stick-whatever) nudging me with a stick. How fitting.

″Oh, this? This is just my cane. I use it to walk,″ he tossed it behind him. ″That was a lie. I don't need a cane. But it's a cane, I assure you.″

″I didn't ask...″ I replied with a groan. I sat up and rubbed the top of my head.

″Thought you would, so I prepared myself. Golly, you're no fun.″

I looked over. It wasn't a cane. It was some branch off of a tree. From the look of things, I was in some storeroom. Still, I blurted out the question.

″Where am I?″

″Please don't think of me as a kidnapper, I'm just a traveler when you get down to it,″ he reassured before I even had time to voice such concerns.

″You literally kidnapped me, but seriously, where am I?″

He whistled before answering. ″Out by the docks. I'm hoping we can both meet my sister.″

″Where are we going? What do you plan to do with me?″

″I'm Marco. Or at least that's what I refer to myself as. What's your name?″

I was getting really annoyed with this 'Marco' character.

″Is this just some quirk of yours that you can't help or are you doing this on purpose?″

″I just want to share some information with you. That and save your life. Golly gee, aren't you ungrateful? Those cops were looking to shoot you dead and cover it up. You know they would cover it up, too, right?″

I gave up. I didn't even humor Marco with a response.

″I promise, we'll just go on a little ride and once I know it's safe to return to land, I'll drop you off. You will be safe, you have my word!″

I sighed. ″My name's Kelly Roger. I don't trust you, but I feel pretty powerless right now, so I figure I don't have a choice.″

Marco blinked. ″Is Roger your last name?″

″No,″ I shook my head. ″Both first name.″

He stroked his chin as if he had a beard. He didn't.

″I already knew that.″

″Then why the fuck did you ask?″ I snapped.

″Hey, hey. I've just been watching you for quite some time. You know Conrad, right?″

″Yeah. That guy's such a dick!″ I ignored the fact that he just admitted to watching me. It didn't feel so bad since Velvet and I had watched over the whole town via hacking into security cameras.

He smiled and nodded. ″Can't be trusted, the fellow.″

I felt a surge of delight fill me.

″I knew it! I always had my doubts about him! He was always going on and on. 'Blanc is important' this and 'Blanc is my best friend. I'd do anything for them' that. Ugh!″

Marco twirled around and reminded me of Black Swan, that one ballerina movie that I never saw but told myself I would check out one of these days. Mostly because Natalie Portman was one of my celebrity crushes.

″I don't know anything about this Blanc fellow, but Conrad doesn't, hm...″ he paused, unsure of what word to use.

″Give a fuck?″ I tried filling in the blanks.

″No, no, that's not it.″ He dismissed. He paced around a bit before going ″aha!″

″Conrad doesn't find whoever that is to be important!″

He looked so pleased with himself, like a dog that just learned a new trick and was begging for a treat. Well I wasn't about to give one to him.

″What about the work Velvet and I did?″

″Hm...yes. He might find others important in the sense that one might find a toolbox, but he doesn't...hm...give a fuck?″

″You could have just said that the first time!″

He whistled and pulled up his sleeve to look at his wrist.

″There's normally a watch here, I can assure you.″

He skipped over to the other end of the building. I turned my head and watched him open the door, letting a flash of light in. He turned to me, grinned, and pointed upward.

″Oh my, look at the time! We gotta get a move on!″

I walked over to where he was standing, the breeze from the river gliding against my chest. My curly red hair flew back.

If I ever let it grow out and meet up with Velvet again, someone on the street might mistake us for twins, I thought. I do hope the two of them are safe right now. Well, not Conrad. He can eat a dick.

″Ah, there she is!″ He pointed at the sky. ″There's my sister! Hello, sister!″

I looked up and he slapped me.

″What are you doing looking at the sky? My sister's on the water!″

I wanted to punch Marco, but something told me it would be like punching a brick wall.

Down by the docks, a gondola approached with a towering umbrella casting a shadow underneath, only allowing a portion of the person riding to be seen, and what little could be seen was just a pair of huge hands over a polka-dot blanket.

″Not every day I see a gondola,″ I remarked. Actually, aside from in pictures, it wasn't any day. I've never seen one in person.

Marco ignored me and leaped into the boat, curling into a ball to fit underneath the umbrella.

″Sister! So good to see you!″ He cheered.

″Polo,″ was the sound I heard in response from what I assumed came from his sister.

I waited until the gondola actually got to the docks before leaning my foot over. The boat tipped and the rest of me began leaning as well, almost against my will. My hands flailed about. Right before I could fall over, just as I feared I would, Marco crawled up and caught me, pulling me into the gondola with him and his 'sister'.

″Kelly Roger, meet my sister, Polo!″ He introduced. I squinted. The two looked nothing alike. Marco was tall and bald with his baseball cap on. Polo was short with dark hair in a bob cut. There were but three things about her that weren't small: her glowing yellow eyes, pupils dilated. Her puffy hands, which bore no hair nor fingernails, her fingers themselves looked webbed. Then there was her large mouth, which appeared to fill the entire bottom half of her face. After a good minute of studying her features, I shifted my gaze to Marco.

″Seriously? Marco Polo? Please tell me that's not your guys' real names.″

″Polo!″ Polo added. Was she a pokemon in disguise?

″We're not blood related, but we're family!″ He answered. Sorta. I still felt lost. ″She's a gay frog!″

″Uh-huh...″ I replied, skeptical. Sure, she didn't look like the average person, but I was pretty sure I knew what frogs looked like. Marco hummed a tune, not seeming to notice my doubts. Flies buzzed around the umbrella. One made its way inside, to which Polo responded by opening her mouth and shooting her tongue forward, wrapping it around the fly. Her tongue slunk back into her mouth and she swallowed.

″Polo!″ She beamed, or it at least looked that way. She seemed happy. I, myself, couldn't believe what I was seeing.

″Did...did she just?″ I stuttered, astonished.

″I once measured. Three feet, five inches.″

I blinked.

Marco stroked his chin. ″Or maybe it was six inches...″

″That's it, I've seen enough! I'm getting off!″

″No, no, maybe I was being generous. Maybe it was four inches...″

I turned around only to realize we already left the docks and were in the middle of the water.

″Polo!″

″That's right! Polo wanted me to let you know that frogs are not the only kind of amphibians.″

I didn't know what I got myself into. I left one crazy group only to find myself in another.

″What a beautiful blue sky, wouldn't you agree, Polo?″

″So what do you want with me?″ I asked.

″Polo!″

″Oh yes, those seagulls are serene!″

″What the fuck are you talking about?″ I shouted. ″I can't see a damn thing!″

Marco blinked. ″I want to tell you how the future will play out.″

″What are you, some fortune teller?″ I scoffed.

″I just know a thing or two about the forces at play.″

″Oh, really?″ I inquired. ″And what forces would those be?″

″Polo!″ Bellowed Polo. Marco shook his head.

″Salamanders are actually amphibians and not lizards,″ he told me.

″What? Those are the forces at play?″

″No. Not yet anyway. They probably will be. Or at least Axolotls. Despite what ETNA believes, axolotls are not extinct.″

″ETNA? You mean the corporation behind the elevator in town?″

″Newts are also amphibians, by the way.″

″Focus, Marco!″ I snapped.

″Polo!″

″I wasn't distracted, I swear! That was valuable information!″ He defended himself, a useless effort. ″Anyway, yes, that very same ETNA. They'll make it big in a few years. Even though they already have. They'll be a little more public. Well, the public will think they know of them.″

″And what will the public know?″

″Not the same things you know. Actually, they won't know anything. They'll just think they'll know.″

″What do I know?″

Marco reached over and slapped me, something I wanted to do to him since he opened his mouth, and he ended up taking that glory from me.

″You've seen the documents. Conrad has even told you that the ETNA corporation is a small section of a secret organization as The Flashbulb. The Flashbulb work in departments, across various universes and times, each department dealing with a different version of Earth.″

″That all sounds ridiculous!″

″But you know it to be true!″ Marco exclaimed, his hands stretched out and touching the umbrella's ceiling. ″Conrad can't be trusted, but he told you the truth and you're a part of this, whether you like it or not!″

I shook my head. ″Sorry, you got the wrong person. All I did was uncover secret government documents.″

″You uncovered secret documents, you were traced back, they found your location, they know you know their secrets. Well, lemme rephrase...″ he paused and looked at Polo. Polo croaked. ″...Some of their secrets. Enough that they'll want to deal with you. Or at least put on a show. I can't say my predictions are 100% accurate.″

″How will they want to deal with me?″

″They've got options. They could kill you. They already tried to do that with those cops earlier. They probably won't try to kill you again, though.″

″Good riddance. I don't think I could handle being shot at again.″

″Instead what they'll probably do is more elaborate. When you return, everything will seem normal. However, your parents, a relative, a friend, might suggest you go into therapy. The therapist, employed by The Flashbulb, will convince you that none of what you saw or were told was real, that they were delusions. Hallucinations. That you suffer from a mental illness. Actually...″ He paused.

″They don't even have to go through that effort. Salamanders can regrow their tails.″

I tried to ignore the last part and not the first. It was difficult to only ignore one and not the other. I was an all-or-nothing kinda person.

″You could board the elevator one of these days. One of these days could turn into several times. When that happens, your memories and perception of reality will be altered. You'll believe that you've been told you have a mental illness. You'll believe it to be true and that you imagined all your interactions with Conrad and Velvet. That you imagined your interactions with me. That all the documents you read never existed. Prescriptions may appear in the mail. If I appear again, you may come to think of me as a hallucination.″

He cleared his throat. ″Sorry, swallowed a fly. I did it by accident. Blame my sister for not catching that one.″

″Why would I board when I know what happens in there?″

He smiled. ″You have your doubts, don't you?″

A shiver ran down my spine. I gulped. Although not quite sure if I believed Marco, I wanted to ask just one thing.

″Did you bring me with you so you could prevent this future?″

Marco laughed. Polo croaked.

″Actually, it might be better to wait and let this play out. Maybe I'm wrong. But then again, if I'm right, then that's all the better.″

″Wow. You're a dick.″

Marco shrugged. ″I'm more open about it than your previous companion.″

″Polo!″ Agreed Polo. Or disagreed. It was hard to make out Polo's tone.

I was boiling. I couldn't trust this Marco guy any more than I could trust Conrad before. I shouldn't have ever trusted either of them. I just joined Conrad and Velvet before because I was bored and he promised me that I could sit in front of a computer all day with the best internet in the whole city. The only real reason he brought me on was because he knew of my abilities as a hacker after I managed to infiltrate a hacker group known as Lilypad and stole some of their e-mails. That was all for fun. Everyone I ever encountered was using me and I was sick of it.

″You know what? I'm leaving. As soon as we get to shore, I'm leaving.″

″Of course. That was what we were going to let you do anyway.″

I was taken aback. ″What? Really?″

″Yeah. Didn't I tell you that? We already know you can't swim.″

″How'd you know that?″

″Polo!″ Polo answered.

Marco put Polo's hand on his chest. ″You can tell certain people can't swim just by looking at them. You're one of those people. You've got it written all over you.″

″Really? What are the signs?″

″Say, about the future. You may think things are great. That society has improved. That's only because you won't know any better. None of it will affect you. You'll have memories that you heard it on TV or the internet, even if you never did. Others will look happier, and that's because they've been chemically conditioned to feel calm about everything.″

″I feel like there's so many fundamental flaws about that. How would that ever work? That seems like a whole lot of work to what amounts to a whole lot of nothing.″

″Not nothing. Slavery,″ he corrected.

″Polo!″ Polo added.

″That's right! Polo wants me to tell you how nutritious flies are!″

″So you brought me on this boat just to tell me all this even though it changes nothing?″

″Gondola,″ Marco corrected.

″Polo!″

″Whatever,″ I scoffed.

The gondola hit against something. Marco turned around.

″Oh, look, here we are. Sand!″

I recognized this area. It was on the other side of town. Sort of a mini-beach.

I leaned over and stepped off the gondola. ″Well, this has been...something.″

Just as I started walking away, I could hear Marco's voice.

″Kelly! Roger!″ Of course he'd butcher my name.

I turned around.

″When the time comes, we'll contact you. I think you'll join our cause willingly.″

A sly smile formed on my face. ″Oh, and what's the purpose of your 'cause'? What do you hope to gain?″

″We want to make the fantasy you'll be living in a reality!″ He cheered.

I shook my head. I was tired of all this nonsense. I caught a bus and went to the station just to prove a point, boarding the elevator inside. Nothing happened, save for the fact that it took me to my parent's house, somewhere I thought of visiting.

It's been three years since all that has happened. I lived with my parents for a little while; they took pity on me after I made up some sob story.. After much persuasion, they had me check into therapy, which I was reluctant to do, not believing in such institutions. I was put on disability and given a studio apartment and a fixed income each month. My life has turned around and I'd like to believe I'm not the same person I was three years ago.

I still have hallucinations and hear voices, but I've come to terms that they're just that; hallucinations. Not real. I wish others knew that people like me aren't dangerous, we can lead perfectly fine lives, and most of the time, just want to be left alone.

Even with that said, there's one voice in particular that seems to visit my apartment every night at 10. It says the same thing.

″Ready to join us?″

I knew nothing would happen. That it was just a voice. But I was getting real sick of it.

On one particular night, I decided enough was enough and reached for the door. It may have been a case of ″I forgot to take my meds that day″ but I had to show this voice, or hallucination who's boss.

Standing at my door was Marco.

″Go away. You're not real,″ I told him.

″I knew you'd say that!″ He grinned, and tossed me into the air.

I landed on the roof of the adjacent building, Polo caught me. Or...maybe I climbed on the roof of that building and I just wasn't aware of it.

″So, ready to join us?″ Marco asked. I didn't see him climb or even jump up to the building. That's how I think it must not have been real.

″If I say yes, will you leave me alone?″

″No!″

″Then why would I say yes?″

″Because you've already joined us in the past. Don't you remember Lilypad?″

My heart started pounding. ″You...you're...?″

″Consider this a formal invitation to the world of Amphibians!″

I couldn't believe it. That's probably why I knew it was real. Ever since I was 12 I wanted to join the secret hacker group known as Lilypad.

″All your predictions came true...″ I whispered.

″Polo,″ agreed Polo.

I walked up to the fridge and peered at its contents. There appeared to be moldy food and nothing at all appetizing. It was in the middle of the day and I tired of walking around, checking the fridge, and seeing the same gross monstrosities every time I opened it up. It would have been nice to see some normal food for once. How the other residents of this place could stand to eat such things, I did not know, but I'm human and I can't just eat whatever.

″How can you guys stand that stuff?″ I leaned over and yelled. Three of them were sitting in the next room, smoking up a fog. They stared at me for a minute, then shrugged. Something about their nonchalance pissed me off, so I let them know how I felt by kicking their fridge. They paid no mind and talked about the inner workings of the universe.

Whatever. I'm sure I have some doritos stashed on my ship somewhere.

I opened the door to the pyramid and was met by a flurry of sand and gusts of hot air. There was not a sight to behold and if I tried to focus on anything, sand would just get in my eyes. All of a sudden I had a new found respect for the Star Wars prequel trilogy; Anakin had a good reason to hate sand.

″Hey, close the door! You're letting all the hot air in!″ One of them moaned. I swear, these folks never get angry, as if they simply don't have the energy.

″Put a cork in it!″ I barked.

They were right, though. I slammed the door shut just to prove a point. It had only been a few seconds and I was already breaking a sweat. Good thing a place like this had air conditioning.

″Do you have to be so loud?″ One of them wondered. In another context it may have sounded like a complaint. The way it was spoken, however, came off as a moment of contemplation.

″I'm antsy. There's a difference,″ I wheezed. The air conditioner may work just fine, but all it took was a short burst of extreme heat to not fare well with me. Walking on the floor felt more like balancing on a tightrope, however cliché that may sound. I started wobbling.

″This is why we keep the door closed,″ an exceptionally high one observed, as if making a breakthrough.

″I...just need to...lie down...for a bit...″

″What you need is herbal refreshments,″ advised one of the elders, pointing to a bong. I say ″elders″ because the older ones tended to have long, gray beards. If they looked anything like Gandalf, I would consider these folks Lord of the Rings cosplayers. As far as I knew, they were just stoners from another planet. A planet long since forgotten.

Water splashed on my face and I wiped it to find the culprit: Blanc. They were standing over me with a glass that once housed water.

″It looked like you needed some,″ they pointed to the glass and started making glub, glub, glub noises.

″In my mouth, not on my face!″

Two Beiges leaned over.

″Take it to the bedroom,″ one of them chortled. I feel like the other would have winked, except Beiges don't have eyelids, just two huge black eyes.

I was about to get up, throw something at the two, or maybe break their bongs, the one thing those aliens seemed to care about.

″You have to admit,″ Blanc pointed out. ″That sounded pretty lewd.″ Yeah, I know, and if the shoe were on the other foot, I would be hysteric, but newsflash: I said it and therefore it's not funny.

″I should've been the one splashing water on your face!″ I growled, then took the glass from Blanc's hand and pretended to splash them. Blanc flinched, and rightfully so. I held onto the cup and marched right to the kitchen. After filling it with tap water and chugging it down, I wiped my face and marched toward the spare room that Conrad had been using.

″I'm sick of being stuck here!″ I announced. ″You said this was only temporary! That we just needed to lay low for a bit! Well it's been three fuckin' years, dude!″

Conrad was tightening a bolt to some machine he said he'd been building. I couldn't get too good of a look since the room was dark, but that didn't really matter.

″You're not stuck here,″ he pointed out. ″You've been going out and getting pizza in Cairo just about every night.″

″What? That's ridiculous! You have no proof!″

He looked up. ″You walk around the place and yell ″who wants pizza?!″

″I...I...I gotta do something to stay sane!″ I went on the defensive.

″How do you even afford all that stuff?″ He glared.

″That's none of your business,″ I glared right back.

″It is when we're wanted by the most terrifying organization. Do you want them to find us?″

″If they're so terrifying, I think they would have by now. I mean, if they wanted us so bad, anyway. Face it: they're just not that into us. They've moved on.″

″Maybe they have, but I haven't,″ Conrad sounded resolute. ″So long as they further their efforts to subjugate Earth in all its forms, I will find a way to stop them. I just need a little more time...″

″That's what you said two years ago!″ I shot back. I slammed his door shut, which he probably appreciated anyway. It was hard to believe three years ago I had such high hopes that I would turn my miserable life around and actually fight back for once instead of hiding away.

Three years ago, Blanc, Conrad, and I were aboard my ship, exiting the headquarters of the ETNA Corporation. It wouldn't have surprised me if it was one base of operation out of many, but there was little time for speculation. We were going back above ground and taking to the skies.

″This is all so cool!″ Blanc admired.

″It is, isn't it?″ I leaned myself against the wall, looking all cool. It wasn't that I was trying to impress anybody; my ship spoke for itself.

Blanc skipped on over to the front where Conrad was sitting, the spell of curiosity overtaking them.

″I have so many questions right now,″ Blanc began.

″I bet you do,″ was Conrad's cold, monotonous response.

″Yeah, anyone in my situation would, wouldn't they?″

″But your situation is unique,″ Conrad added.

″Shit, you're right!″ Blanc agreed and snapped their fingers. Blanc then looked down and stamped their feet. I knew that look all too well: the look of trying to find what to say and worried about making things awkward. Likely thinking about what question to ask to start with.

″Say, that Etna lady called those guards Prinnies! Isn't that funny?″ Blanc blurted.

″It stands for Practical Reinforced Integrated Nuclear Neural Independent Enhanced Soldier.″

″That's a mouthful. No wonder she stuck with Prinnies,″ Blanc remarked. For some weird reason, the name made me think of penguins.

I smirked. I wanted to say I liked this kid based on quirk alone, but it was too soon to judge. I didn't get much of an impression of the previous Blanc; the only thing that lingered was the stench of decay.

″You really have no idea what's going on, do you?″ Conrad snapped.

″Well, no, but I figure it's not something great. I'm not sure who's more in the wrong, though...me or the government. I mean, they're killing people and replacing them with clones, but I trespassed on their facility by mistake. So I think it's a bit of a toss up.″

I snorted. I couldn't tell if they were being sarcastic or genuine and that made it all the more funny. There was a certain innocence to this Blanc that I admired. Maybe I would have still had that innocence too if I hadn't fucked up my life so much.

″It's not just the government. It's corporations. Members of various governments around the world. Renowned scientists from around the globe. No, not just the globe. Multiple globes.″

″Like Saturn?″

″No, just Earth!″

″Saturn's not a globe?″

″Listen, Blanc: This secret organization is known as The Flashbulb. They desire a new world order across multiple versions of Earth. They can travel between alternate realities, they can travel through time. They are pure evil.″

Blanc put their index finger on their chin. ″Yeah, I mean, I kinda got that vibe, but I wasn't sure, y'know?″

Conrad looked annoyed. He was about to call his, at one point in time, best friend, a dimwit. I was sure of it. Instead, he drew a deep breath and exhaled.

″So we were friends, right? The me before me, that is?″ Blanc asked.

″Yes, and there was a different you before that. One who I lost. I lost the one that came before you, too, but this you was different. The Blanc I knew was brave and smart and for the longest time I thought we would really win. With just the two of us, we would create a resistance and defeat not only the ETNA Corporation, but The Flashbulb as a whole. However, at the very last second, a top ranking member of The Flashbulb turned back time.″

″So it's not so much that that Blanc was erased as it is that things turned out differently this time around.″

″It's essentially the same thing!″

″Yeah, I guess you're right. Though I gotta ask, if time changed before and none of that ended up happening after all, how can you recall it happening?″

″I...″ Conrad was at a loss for words. This was interesting. Mildly interesting, but still interesting, nonetheless. ″I just can. It's not all that important.″

″What's important is to keep moving forward, right?″

″Speaking of which, it shouldn't be much longer before we get to Egypt,″ I chimed in. I was feeling left out, and no one's allowed to make me feel left out except me.

″Oh yeah!″ Blanc turned their head. ″What's there in Egypt, anyway?″

″You know the eye on the pyramids on the dollar bill?″ Conrad asked Blanc.

″Oh yeah! So both The Flashbulb and The Illuminati exist?″

Conrad shook his head. ″No, the eye is just a doorbell. There's another faction that wishes to control the Earth. We're visiting their hideout. I figure if we can form a temporary alliance, the both of us can defeat The Flashbulb and then we'd have one less enemy to worry about.″

″Oh jeez! I'm gonna be so far from my apartment! I didn't even bring a change of clothes with me! Can we go back to my place and get my stuff?″ Blanc started freaking out.

″No.″

″Aw man, now what?″

″We'll play it by ear.″

Blanc slouched over and started whining. I walked over and gave them a pat on the back.

″There, there. If I left anything behind, I'd be upset, too.″ I noticed this Blanc didn't smell so bad. Well, a little bad. Blanc smelled like they needed a shower, but at least they didn't smell like a rotting corpse.

Blanc perked up. ″Hey, at least it'll be like an adventure! I've never been outside the country!″ I walked away. My job was done. I had done at least two good deeds that day, that was more than enough for me.

″Oh wow, look at all those buttons!″ I overheard. I didn't want to eavesdrop, but curiosity got the best of me and I saw Blanc leaning over at the dashboard.

″Yes, and don't touch any of them,″ Conrad groaned. ″It's not your ship.″

I wasn't about to stand for such a nasty attitude.

″You're right, it's mine!″ I yelled. ″Leave Blanc alone!″

Blanc was about to press a button, which could very well have been the self-destruct button (if the ship had one).

″But seriously, kid,″ I added. ″Don't touch anything!″

I fell asleep on one of the bunk beds in back of the ship. I didn't trust Conrad's intentions, but I trusted him enough to get us there. That was enough for now.

A few hours later, I awoke to a crash. I bolted up and only saw darkness around me.

The ship was still intact. I was fine.

″What's going on?!″ I shouted.

″It's fine!″ Conrad called back. ″We're here!″

I went up to the front and turned the headlights to my ship on. All around the ship was a pit of sand and ancient hieroglyphs. In front of the ship stood a large door, fitting for the fe-fi-fo-fum variety, not the average human height.

″You coming or what?″ Blanc yelled, their voice sounding more joyous than antsy.

″Yeah, yeah, gimme a minute!″

I scrambled down the steps all while muttering profanities.

″God damn it, Conrad. I told you not to make the ship physical without my okay.″

Outside, I heard a couple taps on the stone door and before I even had time to face it, it opened up. I ran, pushing Blanc and Conrad aside, just to get a view of what this so-called other faction would be.

What emerged from the other side were three tall figures, clad in blouses and hula skirts. Their skin lumpy, several warts covered their bodies, but none seemed to swell. Every inch of their body was the same pale sandy fawn color. Their eyes, although pitch black, seemed to illuminate the surrounding.

″I'm not saying it's aliens, but...″ Blanc muttered.

″It's aliens,″  Conrad replied, not sounding the least bit amused or surprised.

One of them stepped forward, and with me being in front, I was a mere two feet away from this being.

″Greetings. You smell of pennies,″ they announced in a soft, matter-of-fact voice.

″What's that supposed to mean?″ I grunted.

″Relax,″ replied Conrad. ″That's just how they greet people.″

I walked forward, brushing past them. I didn't have time to hear how I smelled.

I overheard the other two being greeted and looked over my shoulder.

″Greetings. You smell of old cabbage,″ they told what I presumed to be Conrad. I never thought of it before, but yeah, Conrad did smell a little like that.

″Greetings. You smell dank,″ the last one told Blanc.

″Is that a good thing or a bad thing?″ Blanc asked.

″It depends on if we can smoke you,″ the being simply replied.

″Ehehe...″ Blanc gave a nervous laugh. I didn't blame the kid. I was just as nervous, truth be told.

″What's with the door?″ I asked one of them. ″You guys are only, like, what, seven feet tall? Don't get me wrong, that's tall, but what gives?″

″Oh, that's just for decoration. You like it?″

″It's unnecessary,″ I pointed out.

″It's about a hundred and twenty feet tall,″ another one replied. ″We could tell you tall it is in meters, but something tells me you guys are American.″

″How do you know what 'American' is?″

″We keep up with current events. We've been here thousands of years, ought to do something productive with our time.″

I see. So that explains why they said 'pennies' and not simply 'copper.' Still, being sniffed out made me uncomfortable.

″Hey, is there a shower in here?″ Blanc piped up. I didn't expect there to be one. This was an ancient race of creatures from another planet.

″Of course. Down the hall and to your left,″ they pointed forward.

I balked. ″What? Really?″

″Water is the foundation of all life.″

I growled. That wasn't fair. Blanc was already running. Sure, they were a little stinky, but they probably just bathed the day prior. With me, it's been...probably about the same time, but what I had going for me was the dried up blood that once flowed down my ears.

I looked around to see a dimly lit space; many halls, many doors leading who knows where. There were stairs leading up, probably to yet another living room and yet another set of halls with many doors.

″Which hall is it? Which door on the left?″ I asked.

″Uh...that one. The first left, I think.″

″Right...″

Everything was so modern despite the place being inhabited by an ancient race. I didn't understand, since I figured they never went outside or left their confines. There was some mystery here, but one I was too apathetic and jetlagged to ponder.

I took a seat on one of the chairs situated in the living room. The placed reeked of weed. I felt like I was going to suffocate. My eyes closed, only to reopen with an alien hovering over me.

″Care to partake in some herbal refreshments?″

″Dude, I just got off a flight, do I look like I'm in the mood?″ I scoffed.

The alien shrugged. ″More for me, then.″

Several hours passed. I must have have been in some deep sleep. What awoke me was a great nudge on my shoulder. I expected it to be a clammy alien, but instead it was Blanc.

″There's no shampoo in the shower,″ they whined.

I yawned. ″Damn, and I was just about to shower, too.″ My stomach made a sound as if to announce it was Mufasa from The Lion King.

″Say, how long was I out?″

Blanc pondered for a bit. ″About a full day. I didn't want to wake you, but Conrad's busy and the Beiges are too faded to answer my questions.″

Huh, I thought. So that's what they're called. I think I recall Conrad mentioning them at some point, but I must've forgotten.

″What? You mean to tell me we've been here for three days?!″

″Well, not a full three days, but yeah.″

I leaped to my feet, my body ready to collapse. It was all sore from sitting backwards in a chair, dozing off for so long.

″C'mon, kiddo. We're going shopping.″

″What? Wouldn't Conrad be mad that we're out in public?″

″He don't need to know a damn thing, alright? We're getting shampoo and a bite to eat, that's all.″

Blanc brightened up.

I was already off to a good start for the day.

It was after the trip in which I decided to formally get to know this Blanc. We came back to the pyramid to find an empty living room. Both of us looked around, but we must have silently agreed that we weren't going to go searching for aliens.

I pulled out the same chair I slept in. Blanc sat on a sofa. They checked their phone, but kept mumbling about there being no signal.

″Hey!″ I snapped.

Blanc looked up.

″Tell me a little about yourself.″

″Well...″ Blanc trailed off, then seemed to be lost in thought. ″I'm a brilliant, but lazy former college student desperately seeking a purpose in life.″

″Do you have to list every trope about yourself?″ I groaned. This was proving fruitless. ″Just tell me who you are, instead.″

″I don't really know. I'm trying to figure that one out.″

I sighed and got up. ″Yeah, I suppose I am too. Maybe with a bit of brainstorming we'll both reach a conclusion.″

I thought I knew myself pretty well. I was a resourceful coward with enough of a history to write a book series about. But this kid, only three days old, proved me wrong. I went upstairs and found an empty room. There was a mattress and a lava lamp. The air in that room gave off a nice chill. Even if the source of the chill was because that room was haunted, I wouldn't have minded being roommates with a ghost.

Maybe taking residence with these aliens will be good for me, I thought. It can give me time to think of just what it is that I really want. There has to be more to me than just self-preservation.

But three years passed and all I have gained is a restlessness. I didn't have some deeper understanding of who I was or what I wanted out of life, but I knew these three years of nothing would soon culminate in something much bigger than anything I've encountered before.

I found Blanc sitting with some Beiges, chatting about metaphysics or whatever it is they talked about. Whatever topics those aliens were interested in, I just knew they were lame ones.

″Hey, wanna get out of here?″ I asked, which got Blanc to perk up.

We walked toward the large doors where my ship was.

″Are we going to get pizza again?″ Blanc asked.

I shook my head and grinned. ″I was thinking of getting out of here for good. We'll even leave Conrad behind.″

To my surprise, a smirk grew on Blanc's face.

″It's about time. I've been planning to do the exact same thing for a while, but I don't know a damn thing on how to pilot your ship.″

″Excellent!″

I walked up to the fridge and peered at its contents. There appeared to be moldy food and nothing at all appetizing. Even though it appeared that way, I knew the Beiges ate it with no problem. Each day I told myself ″I shouldn't knock it until I try it,″ even though I never end up trying it. I closed the fridge and re-opened it. Then I closed it again.

No, I shook my head. Today is not the day I'll try their gross looking food. Maybe tomorrow.

I opened it again. Maybe I'll just poke it. It doesn't smell all that bad, at least. Just looks it.

I reached my finger toward the slimy and furry substance only to pull it back.

Come on, you're not that stupid.

I closed the fridge for the last time. When I looked up, one of the elder Beiges was there.

″Your friend Velvet opened the door leading outside. It was a hot day. She closed it, but the damage was already done. You should get her a glass of water,″ they explained.

″Velvet's not really my friend. We're more like roommates who try to get along, even if they have no common ground,″ I also explained, but then thought it over. ″Actually, she's like an older sister.″

The elder Beige walked away, which led me to snap to my senses. ″Right! Water!″

I reached into the cupboard and grabbed a glass, then filled it with water. I didn't want her to die, and she probably would have come back as a ghost only to complain about how lame her death was. I didn't want her to do that, either. If she wanted to die, she probably wanted a cool death. Like being shot by a laserbeam against a shark alien pirate in a gunfight.

My breath was shortening, my heart was racing. I didn't know how much longer I could go. Luckily, I didn't have to go any longer: it was just around the corner. Also it was pretty pathetic of me to be so out of shape.

I was about to reach down and save her, but in my rush, I tripped over the carpet.

Water splashed in her face. She rose to her feet, wiping it off and looking ready to raise hell.

″It looked like you needed some,″ I explained, nervous as I was. I never meant to throw it at her. I made a gesture with the glass in an attempt to lighten the situation.

Instead, she chewed me out.

″In my mouth, not on my face!″

I did my best to hold back my laughter.

″Take it to the bedroom!″ One of them chortled. I spat.

Come on, guys! Really?

Velvet was fuming. I had to do damage control.

″You have to admit, that sounded pretty lewd,″ I pointed out.

You did it. You're saved.

Or so I thought. But instead, she snatched the glass right from my hand.

″I should've been the one splashing water on your face!″ She growled and pretended to splash me. I flinched, as anyone would. Jeez. All I could do was watch as she walked away.

I let out a sigh and turned toward the Beiges. ″It's okay, she'll get me back later. I have a tendency to accidentally say lewd things as well. I'm sure she'll point it out.″

That's right. Velvet and I were too similar at times. It made me wonder what the real difference between us were. Sure, she had different hair than me, and identified differently. She also had some mysterious past whereas I was pretty bland. I didn't have any secrets like she did. But those were trivial, we were essentially the same person otherwise.

″You know,″ I told one of the elders once. ″I'm actually a clone of someone else. It's not really a bother, but...it means I haven't really been around that long and I'm essentially living in the shadow of someone else. Granted, that someone else was just as boring as me, but I'm just trying to figure out what makes me different, if anything.″

″You want to know what your 'self' is, yes?″ The elder questioned.

″I guess that's a good way to put it. Like, what even is the 'self'?″

″Sit down, child,″ the elder motioned. I was about to sit down when the elder spoke again. ″Never mind. Keep standing. This shouldn't take long to explain.″ The elder took a hit from a bong, then coughed before speaking once more.

″There is no 'self',″ they explained. ″Only a series of memories and chemicals reacting to one another.″

″Thanks,″ I replied. ″I don't feel any better, but I feel like I should have learned something.″

I decided to sit next to the elder Beige after all. Beiges were an incredible bunch with vast amounts of wisdom to share. Even if they were high most of the time when spouting such wisdom, I made it a duty of mine to listen as close as my ever fleeting attention span would allow.

″Funny thing about memory...the past me lived in an apartment. Well, I think it was still mine. Shit, they must've evicted me a long time ago by now. All my stuff must've been put in storage or given away at Goodwill or some auction or I don't know what else.″

″No matter. Material possessions are meaningless in the grand scheme of things,″ the elder reassured.

″I had a PS4 and an awesome gaming rig,″ I whined.

The elder's mouth went agape and stared at me. ″Why didn't you bring that shit with you, my dude?!″

″I didn't know I would get myself into this mess!″ I balked. Out of curiosity, I checked my phone. Still no signal. Ever since coming here I didn't have signal and even if I did, the last time the phone bill was paid was the same time my rent was paid. I slunk back, an utter mess.

″Ugh, Pokemon Go's probably at gen five by now.″

″Isn't that generally considered to be the worst generation?″ Velvet asked, poking her head from around the corner.

″What? Who told you that? There's a bunch of great Pokemon. Like...the otter pop, and...ice cream.″

″You're just hungry,″ Velvet teased.

″No! There's also...uh...garbage...and...pawn shop...also, uh...scopophobia! That's right!″

In my head, my Pokemon knowledge was known across the world, but my current audience just wasn't impressed. ″Well, I think it's pretty cool...″

I had to admit, even without Pokemon Go, real life had been pretty cool as well. Who would have thought that I would evade being killed by an evil organization and meet a group of stoner aliens inside (and underneath) a pyramid?

″Mind passing the bong?″ I asked the elder.

″Certainly.″

Upon taking a hit, the current day faded and my consciousness returned to the day I was rescued on Velvet's ship.

″This is all so cool!″ I admired. Indeed, not even in my faintest memories had I seen anything like it.

″It is, isn't it?″ Velvet smirked, leaning against the side of the ship. She may have had such a smug face, but if I owned a ship like hers, I would have boasted twice as hard. So to me, she was being modest.

I looked around for Euphoria. She would have loved to see it. Or maybe just being in awe of the ship would have made her happy, instead. Alas, she was nowhere to be found and I started to lose composure.

Not wanting to seem unhappy in front of anyone, I ran to the front of the ship where Conrad was seated. I tried asking him a few questions, but every little word he said just screamed ″you're annoying me.″ Even if it wasn't true, I didn't want it to become true. So after Conrad told me not to press any of the buttons, I went silent. It was nice of Velvet to step up for me, but I didn't need her to. She hardly even knew me.

When I turned around to see what she was up to, she was nowhere to be seen.

First Euphy, then Velvet. Here I thought my luck was impeccable, but I lost two girls in one day.

″Do you know where Velvet went?″ I asked Conrad.

″She's just sleeping. There's bunk beds in the back,″ he replied.

″I see.″

″It's been a long day for us,″ he explained.

And it hasn't been a long day for me? Do you have any fucking clue what I've been through? Any clue at all? What about how I feel right now? Does any of that factor in?

I brushed aside such thoughts and kept my mouth shut. He must have noticed my dismay, though, as he spoke up.

″Hey, I'm sorry for coming off so aloof,″ he began. ″It's just that watching a friend die can be a little...overwhelming.″

″Don't sweat it! I'm sure my previous self meant a lot to you!″ I sympathized.

Even though when I think about it, you were always this cold and detached. I don't know why it never occurred to me before, but I don't think me – any version of me – ever meant a damn thing to you.

Again, I shook off such thoughts. I was just being needlessly bitter. Just because he was a little socially awkward doesn't mean he was a monster. He meant well. Deep down in my heart, I knew.

″Hey, can I ask another question?″

He shrugged. ″Ask away.″

″Do you know anything about The Flashbulb being in possession of a being that can make anyone and anything 'happy'?″

″What do you mean?″

″Well...like...the ability to defy logic. If it made a brick wall happy to become a giant chocolate bar, the being would grant such a wish in an instant.″

″That doesn't make any sense,″ he dismissed. ″Brick walls don't feel emotions.″

″That's what I'm saying! It would defy logic!″

He shook his head. ″I've seen no such records.″

″Well, what about the ETNA project? Would such a being fall under that?″

″Etna is the ETNA project. Well, her and the elevator her company created.″

″But what if the company, or The Flashbulb, or something affiliated, had such a thing? What if it's an even more secret project? Like...the 'E' could stand for Euph...″ I started to say her name. The name I might have given her. I didn't want to seem crazy. ″Euphemia, maybe?″

Even with his hood scrunched up and glasses covering his shrunken eyes, I could tell there was nothing but confusion on his face.

″Euphemia?″

″Err...Maybe 'Effie' for short?″

″You're not making any sense,″ he grunted.

″I know,″ I pouted.

I tried following Velvet's lead and dozed off in the chair.

″YOU MANIPULATED ME!″ A voice screamed. One minute I was sitting down, the next I was standing in a vast darkness. Standing before me was a girl in an angel outfit.

″I did not!″ I protested.

″YOU AREN'T REALLY HAPPY! YOU SAID IT WOULD MAKE YOU HAPPY TO KNOW THE TRUTH ABOUT YOU! THEN YOU SAID IT WOULD MAKE YOU HAPPY TO PUNCH THAT HOLOGRAM! THEN YOU SAID YOU WERE HAPPY, BUT IT WASN'T TRUE! YOU STILL AREN'T HAPPY AND YOU WERE JUST USING ME!″

″It's...it's not like that! You made me happy, even if it was only in short bursts!″

She smiled a smile that stretched across the void. Her teeth, her lips, her tongue, surrounded me in a circle. She no longer had a face, just a mouth. Even still, she did not scare me. If anything, it was comforting to know that she was all around me.

″Is there any way I can see you again?″ I pleaded.

″IF YOU WISH TO SEE ME, YOU WILL FIND A WAY!″

Those words left me choked up. I swallowed an oasis of saliva. ″Are you still my guardian angel?″ I asked, in tears.

″I AM EVERYONE'S GUARDIAN ANGEL! I BRING HAPPINESS TO ALL!″

Electricity coursed through me, or so it felt that way. For second I thought Etna, hologram or human, was standing in front of me. But instead, my eyes were open. I was sitting next to Conrad in a ship set on auto-pilot. Out the window was a glittering blue sea.

″Are you okay?″ Conrad asked.

I don't think I was. My heart was beating at an uncomfortable pace.

″Yeah, I think I had a bad dream, is all,″ I replied in a huff, my hand over my chest. ″Say, are we really going to go to Africa?″

″We're already in Africa. We're just floating over a small body of water right now.″

″Okay. But what about when we get to Egypt?″

″We're already in Egypt. We're just floating over a small –″

″Yeah, okay,″ I groaned. ″So what, then?″

″We find the right pyramid and land.″

″How will we know which one's the right one?″

He growled, then slammed his fist on the dashboard. ″You ask too many questions,″ he replied.

″Well excuse me for being curious,″ I scoffed. ″You'd think you would ask too many questions, too, what with your mistrust of governments.″

He looked away. I made a mental note to count that as a victory.

″That's something Blanc would have said.″

″Well, duh, because I am Blanc.″

″Same name, different person.″

You're a loose end. There should never exist more than one of someone.

″Say, wasn't there another me after I threw my math homework into the elevator?″

″Yes, but they didn't last long,″ he replied, still looking away.

″So Etna didn't have to try to kill me after all?″

″Well...″ He was probably thinking it was because I trespassed into the company's lair, or that I knew too much.

″She said I was a mistake, that there shouldn't exist more than one of someone. She probably meant at a time, too, seeing as the one before me died and the one after me did as well.″

This time he turned back toward me and took off his glasses. His face was not something I wanted to see. I should have yelled ″put those back on!″ But I was at a loss.

″She must have known that. By all accounts, she should have come up with a better excuse to kill you.″

″Gee, thanks.″

″I don't understand. I'll have to think this over.″

″Eh, it's probably nothing,″ I shrugged. ″I suppose even evil geniuses have their moments of stupidity. It's not like she was great with words or anything.″

Something had him troubled, but I wasn't going to press. Not when we needed to concentrate on figuring out which pyramid housed these aliens. Conrad held out his laser pointer, pointing it to the tip of each pyramid. From what I gathered, the one whose tip would light up must have been the right one.

″This is like trying to find straw in a haystack.″

″You mean a needle,″ Conrad corrected.

″No, straw. Needles look way different than hay. Straw, though...″

Before I could finish my sentence, which was going to be just a few more words, anyway, a red flash shot up from below.

Upon looking down, I stood in awe as sands started shifting away from each other, forming a deep pit. Conrad lowered the ship, not even a little ″yes! We finally found it!″ As the ship lowered itself underground, next to an innocuous pyramid, the sands around us changed color to a redder and redder tint. I thought we were being swallowed up by a bloodied stomach.

Our surrounding grew darker and darker until a plate of some sort closed the surface back up. To my surprise, the sands didn't flow back inward and the only thing to encase us was darkness.

Conrad pulled himself out of his chair and pressed a button. Velvet's ship was made physical from the outside once more. He jogged to where the door was and pressed the button on the wall to lower the stairs. Wait. He jogged? Conrad didn't strike me as the type to have such energy.

As I followed close behind, stumbling through the darkness, we reached a dead end. Or so I thought. I pulled out my phone, the light being just enough to illuminate the wall. Turns out it wasn't a wall at all but a door, over a hundred feet tall.

I checked my phone; no signal. I sighed. Guess there would be no Pokemon Go for me.

″Should we knock?″ I wondered.

Conrad shook his head. ″We should wait for Velvet to wake up.″

″What's going on?″ Came a shout from the ship. Velvet must have just woken up right on time. Thank goodness, too. I wasn't the patient type.

″It's fine!″ Conrad called back. ″We're here!″ ″You coming or what?″ I yelled, inserting myself into the conversation.

″Yeah, yeah, gimme a minute!″ She shouted. Before Velvet got down, I decided to give the door a couple taps, too excited to wait for her.

Velvet shoved past Conrad and I and as soon as she got in front, we all saw what we had been waiting for: three tall figures, clad in blouses and hula skirts. Their skin lumpy, several warts covered their bodies, but none seemed to swell. Every inch of their body was the same pale sandy fawn color. Their eyes, although pitch black, seemed to illuminate the surrounding.

″I'm not saying it's aliens, but...″ I muttered.

″It's aliens,″  Conrad replied, not sounding the least bit amused or surprised.

One of them stepped forward and greeted Velvet.

″Greetings. You smell of pennies,″ they announced in a soft, matter-of-fact voice.

″What's that supposed to mean?″ she grunted.

″Relax,″ assured Conrad. ″That's just how they greet people.″

Velvet walked past the one who greeted her, looking pissed.

The second alien greeted Conrad next.

″Greetings. You smell of old cabbage,″ I made a mental note to sniff Conrad sometime. I'd have to confirm such a thing for myself.

Conrad didn't comment on his smell and went forward. That just left me.

″Greetings. You smell dank,″ the last one told me.

″Is that a good thing or a bad thing?″ I asked.

″It depends on if we can smoke you,″ the being simply replied.

I understood what they were getting at, but never in my life had I smoked weed, so it didn't seem possible. Maybe they were just smelling my sweat from all the peril I was in earlier.

″Ehehe...″ I gave a nervous laugh.

Velvet started making small talk with the aliens. I didn't catch a word, but all this talk about smells got me thinking.

″Hey, is there a shower in here?″ I interrupted. Showers tend to relax me after a good deal of stress. Or it helped relax the me that used to exist.

″Of course. Down the hall and to your left,″ they pointed forward.

I ran down the hall, leaving Velvet to continue her conversation. There were many halls, but I stuck to the one the alien pointed toward. Ever so brief, the thought of Euphoria, pointed me in the right direction, back when I was in the maze that was the ETNA Corporation's headquarters.

Hot water shot down, forming steam around the room. It was one of those sliding glass door showers, the bathroom itself pretty small, but it had all the things you would expect from a bathroom. All in all, pretty impressive for a race from another planet. But then again, maybe they had showers on their planet, as well.

The water soothed me, cleansing me of any doubts and worries. I grasped at the soap, gliding it against my chest, stomach, arms, legs, then face. After those were washed off, I reached for the bottle of shampoo, ready to get my hair all silky smooth.

All I reached for was an empty space, however. There was no shampoo. I should have figured, seeing as those aliens were bald, but it still disappointed me. I sighed and turned off the water.

After I got myself all dressed, I found the living room. Velvet was asleep in a chair. I was tempted to wake her, but decided against her. She'll wake up on her own, I figured.

Some of the aliens were sitting on a couch and taking hits from bongs. Scents of flowers filled the air, or some kind of plant, anyhow. It was a nice, inviting smell.

″Oh, hey, where'd Conrad go?″ I asked one.

″Took residence in a storage closet. Said they'd be busy for a while.″

″Ah. Well, what should I call you guys?″

″Your friend Conrad called us 'Beige'. You're free to do the same,″ one of the Beiges replied.

″That's easy to remember.″ Now that they mentioned it, they did have a rather beige look to them.

I took a seat in between the two. They didn't look all that threatening.

″Did you guys help the Egyptians build the pyramids? Hell, did you guys build them yourselves?″

All of them in the room stared at me. Then they laughed.

″We helped the Egyptians, sure. When we crash landed on Earth thousands of years ago, we brought the cannabis plant with us. We taught them how to grow dank kush. In return, they built a pyramid for us to in our honor.″

″So you didn't help with the pyramids, though?″

″Nah, brah. They were already there when we got here.″

I snapped my fingers. ″Well, that's one mystery solved!″

Velvet was still in a deep slumber. She must have been a heavy sleeper.

″What about you?″ The one sitting to my left asked. ″What brings you here? What's your story?″

″Well...I took an elevator and found myself in the lair of an evil corporation known as the ETNA Corporation. Though Conrad tells me they're really a front for a group called The Flashbulb.″

″Ah yes, The Flashbulb. Nasty bunch. But that's humans for ya!″

″Amen, bruh! Take a puff!″ Added another Beige.

″I was saved by this girl Velvet over here. We flew off in her ship and now I'm here,″ I explained further.

″Girl, boy, you humans are so strange.″

″What do you mean?″

″We Beiges don't have need for such thing as 'gender'. Hell, most of us don't even have names. Except Tim. We kept trying to talk sense into Tim, but the dude don't wanna listen.″

I smiled. These aliens were less alien than I thought. To me, they could have been the kindred spirits I had been looking for.

″I think I get it,″ I replied. ″I mean, I'm kinda the same way, but I guess I don't care so much how others see me. Or I care a lot, but I'm too tired to want to correct anyone.″

″That's a good way to be,″ one commended.

″I have a name, but I don't know if it really fits me. I'm not sure if I would change it, though. Maybe I'll grow into it. I feel like I'm living in a shadow, though.″

″Don't worry about it,″ the Beige to my right suggested. ″If you want a name, keep it. If you don't want one, throw it away.″

My smile remained. ″Thanks. I think I'm ha...″ I stopped, then corrected myself. ″I think I'm glad to be here.″

″You're welcome to stay as long as you wish. Or leave as long as you wish.″

″Is everyone welcome here? Is that how you have all these human things?″

An older Beige laughed a throaty laugh. ″Some mysteries, child, are best left unexplained.″

I sighed.

The following day, Velvet was still asleep. It was the day after when she finally awoke. She was hungry and I needed shampoo, so we both went out for a bit. Truth be told, I was a little hungry as well. When we got back, she decided to have a little heart-to-heart with me.

″Why don't you tell me a little about yourself? She asked.

″Well...″ I trailed off. The whole question caught me off guard. Was she some sort of therapist? ″I'm a brilliant, but lazy former college student desperately seeking a purpose in life.″

″Do you have to list every trope about yourself?″ She groaned. ″Just tell me who you are, instead.″

″I don't really know. I'm trying to figure that one out.″ I'm Blanc. I know that much. But just who is Blanc, when it all comes down to it?

″Yeah, I suppose I am too. Maybe with a bit of brainstorming we'll both reach a conclusion,″ she said after getting up and letting out a sigh.

There seemed to be a kindred spirit between Velvet and I, as well. Or maybe it was my lack of understanding of myself that made me see myself in everything around me.

After a year of wandering around the pyramid and venturing outside on occasion, one of the elder Beiges approached me. It also happened to be a rare moment where Conrad was outside of the room, or storage closet, as the Beige told me.

″Come with me. I have something to show you,″ the elder Beige instructed. I didn't question it, but let my heart pound at the anticipation of whatever it could be. Conrad squinted.

″What about me?″ He asked. He sounded suspicious.

″This is for the child Blanc only,″ the elder explained.

I got all giddy, rubbing my hands together. As the Beige led me to a door I hadn't been aware of before, I turned to Conrad and stuck my tongue out. Hell yeah I was gonna gloat.

When I reemerged, Conrad was still standing.

″What did the elder Beige show you? Was it a weapon of sorts? Don't believe a word the Beiges tell you. Remember they're our enemy. Were they trying to manipulate you? Did it work?″ Conrad interrogated. It was clear the guy was jealous as fuck, but I was ready to be the bearer of disappointing news.

″It was just a bong collection,″ I shrugged. ″Unless they're weapons of vapor destruction, I don't think it was anything special.″

Sure, I was selling what I saw short, but I had to. Conrad wouldn't have been able to handle it. He just didn't understand the simpler things in life.

Flash forward a couple more years and I was still living with the Beiges. They taught me many things, like how to weave baskets, how to make my own clothes, and how to properly use a bong. I knew I would have to leave them soon, however, and the day Velvet opened the door at the front of the pyramid, letting all the hot air in from the surface, and being mad at me when she was the one who said something lewd would end up being that day.

Funny thing was, for all the things they taught me, I wasn't even aware I would be leaving them that day. Velvet was off in the distance bitching out Conrad, and I was sitting with my Beige friends. That day, something came over me. It might have been the high I was experiencing, but I just had the strongest urge to confess something. Something that had been on my mind since living with them.

They must have sensed it, too. One of the elders spoke up.

″You look lost in love,″ they observed.

″Huh?″ I bolted. ″That's not it! I was just thinking of someone. Or someone I imagined.″

Recently, my dreams had been the same: the nightmare I had three years ago, on Velvet's ship.

″Tell us about this imaginary friend.″

Oh gosh, I thought. This was going to be so awkward.

″Well...she was like one of those manic pixie dream girl types,″ I began.

″Ramona Flowers?″ Another Beige chimed in. I shook my head.

″No, and not Zooey Deschenel, either. I mean, like, a literal manic pixie dream girl.″

Most of the Beiges started laughing. They kept telling each other what they thought a literal manic pixie dream girl looked like. None of those images quite matched, though. Only the elder seemed to remain interested.

″Go on,″ they instructed.

″Well, when I told you guys three years ago that I was saved by Velvet and Conrad, it wasn't exactly true. They brought me here, sure, but the one who saved me was someone, or something, else entirely.″

There were murmurs now.

″Go on,″ the elder once again said.

″She claimed she was my guardian angel. She floated around, calling herself 'Euphoria.' I thought Euphy was a better name and she took it. She claimed she wanted to make me happy. As we went through the company's underground base of operations in my city, she was able to bend reality, or so it seemed. She stopped guards from shooting them and made their weapons happy, made them happy, everything was about happiness when it came to her. Against all odds, and logic, she saved me from dying by the hands of a hologram known as Professor Etna. Even though Etna claimed that her company, and I guess by extension, The Flashbulb, controlled Euphy.″

″Could it be?″ One muttered.

″No way...″ Muttered another.

They all looked freaked out, like someone just called the cops. It must have been the paranoia setting in.

I decided I should add just one more thing. ″I'm not sure if she was really there, though, or if I just had really good luck. I mean, my memories are really fuzzy and I could have just made the whole thing up. Even still, I haven't felt her presence since that day and to this day, I feel a certain emptiness.″

There was a short pause before the elder spoke up once more.

″If The Flashbulb claims to be in possession of something like that, they're done for,″ the elder laughed. It wasn't a genuine laugh, but one of fear. ″They've really done it this time. We're ALL screwed!″

″What do you mean?″ I asked.

″We have tales of such a being. No one knows where it comes from, or if it has an origin at all, but its actions are the same wherever it goes: each world it visits, happiness is spread. We never thought we would hear of such a being again.″

″How is that a bad thing?″

″You don't understand. Happiness, true happiness, is not an emotion. It is a state. Many, including The Flashbulb, would consider it a calm, a sense of contentment. But that's not it at all. What this being brings is a state of destructive bliss. A terrible mania. The Flashbulb probably thought they could control it, use it to further their goals, but they will learn the awful truth: that it cannot be controlled. It cannot be contained. It acts on its own desires, volition, and if let loose, will bring about a swift end to the Earth.″

I gulped. ″Well, if it's been three years and nothing's happened, she must have left, right?″

″We can only hope. Otherwise we're all doomed! Doomed, bruh!″

″I...I...what if I...″ The words were trying to form. No, not just the words. Who I was, what I was meant for. I finally knew what I wanted. ″What if I were to talk to her? Convince her to do the right thing and let things be? Or convinced her to use her abilities to benefit the world?″

″'She' cannot be reasoned with. 'She' cannot simply be talked to. What do you care, anyway? You should be lucky she's gone and you still have your mind intact!″

″She made me happy!″ I shouted, my own voice scaring me. The elder didn't seem deterred.

″That's what 'she' does. You're just experiencing withdrawal.″

″I don't care! I want to see her...just one more time...″ Tears began to well up, but I wiped them away. It was dumb to cry; I knew how I would do it.

″Semi-related question: is there any way to create more than one of you without cloning yourself or making a hologram?″

″No. Why do you ask?″

″No reason!″ I answered, grinning now. Another elder, one who wasn't present, probably knew why I asked.

″I'll find a way. I'll bring happiness to the world and save it as well!″ I declared.

″Child, your motivation is admirable. If you do not succeed, you are welcome back here.″

″Thank you,″ I replied with complete sincerity, even though I already knew I would succeed.

[phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess]

Interesting message to wake up to:

“ I have a bit of a random question.  I am not trying to be rude or accusing, just genuinely curious.   

 Why are you so vocal about US politics?  I understand what happens over here effects everyone (though largely I think it's because we can't keep our hands to ourselves or shut up), but a lot of the people I follow who aren't american have added tags associated with our politics to their blacklist (can't say I blame them, I'm sick of hearing about it and I live here).  

You are easily one of the most vocal and prolific bloggers on my dash when comes to US politics (Mark Ruffalo outranks you in that regard, unsurprisingly).  You could easily get annoyed and leave it be; you can't vote or influence our government directly beyond assisting awareness.

So I can't help but wonder, why?”

- - - - 

If you have to ask that question, then I do not think you understand the gravity of the situation.

Every country has political concerns, ours is a Prime Minister that keeps lying and keeps money in off-shore bank accounts so he doesn’t have to pay tax on it. Still, a slight step up from budgie-smuggler boy and his incredible feats of racism, misogyny, and onion-eating.

But the US tends to set a benchmark. America had Obama, during a time when the rest of the world was in chaos. Australia’s PM position was reduced to a game of musical chairs, the UK had the whole Brexit thing, human rights were being violated in other countries every second of every day and you don’ want to know what was happening to animals.

Obama, despite the blatantly racist haters, did a lot for that country; a lot that Trunk is now undoing, like a spiteful child that just moved into their cool older sibling’s room and immediately trashing anything that reminds them it was not theirs to begin with. Healthcare, human rights protections, unemployment decreasing, etc. And the man basically took over the presidency while everything was on fire; you know, like that one COMMUNITY gif, where the dude turned up with pizza for a party. 

He, and his family, were always under attack; but he still did his best to protect the citizens of the country. Overturning quite a few fucked up laws, and those are just the ones the rest of the world knew about. I have no doubt he got a few bills across his desk that he laughed at as he set them on fire; or the political equivalent.

-

Fast-forwards to now.

Apart from the fact the US has the weirdest fucking voting system ever, where the person with the most votes can still lose; and no one is legally required to vote, but has to register every election, which means that their votes can be discounted with ‘computing errors’. The country made a mistake.

The hypocrisy of not wanting a Jewish man with heaps of political experience, or a woman with years of political experience, for President... is telling; considering what you elected anyway. I was very loud then, too.  Why? Because it was blatantly obvious to everyone from the outside how dangerous the Repubic-lican candidate(s) were and are. Think of it like standing on the beach, noticing a shark heading towards the surfers; you are calling out, “Look, there’s a fucking shark, move your ass mate!”, and only a few of them decide to swim in. The rest tell you that the shark has the right to be there, and that the shore’s emails are probably more of a problem. 

It was seriously concerning how many people were pro-Repub, pro-trunk. How they could not hear what he was saying; not understand that the rest of the world saw him as one hell of a dangerous practical joke being played on you all. And he was a joke, right up until he was elected and people realised, ‘Well fuck, he’s a problem now that he’s infringing on our white rights?’. 

Which the POC, LGBPTA+, disabled, and other communities could have told you from the start. (Which is why it’s so confusing to see people still at his rallies with ‘Women for Trunk’ and ‘Blacks for Trunk!’ signs... do you not know what he’s doing or are you getting paid?)

And the worst part is that if you remove this man, it’s like a matroyshka doll of bad decisions, trying to replace him. You have the ‘let’s electrocute the gays straight’ Pence, next in line... and he’s the tip of the racist/misogynistic/homophobic conservative iceburg, right? Everyone else after that is equally problematic.

-

He bragged on live tv that he doesn’t pay taxes... like, at what point does your privilege run out?

Average peopl would fail to file taxes one year and lose everything. But not Trunk, oh no.

-

The man in charge of everything, not only has no actual understanding of what he’s doing or basic legislative powers... but he’s a god-damned pedophile, racist, rapist, scam/conartist, and probably a dozen other things we don’t know about because he’s papered over it with money nd fancy lawyers.

His 13yr old victim had to give up prosecuting the injustice done against her, bc people were sending her death threats on his behalf. The man openly says on multiple occasions, he’d like to fuck his daughter (including sexualising his newborn in an interview about her birth, which was downright creepy, and more recently saying that what he has in common with his daughter is ‘Hopefully sex!’). The man bought beauty pageants to perv on the women involved; and has groped people inappropriately, then joked about it on stage.

What he did to his former wives is horrific; and he used gag orders to keep them quiet.

The fact he, not only mocked a disabled reporter so disrespectfully to the sound of Repubic-lican applause... but ALSO bragged he could kill someone in the middle of a public street and get away with it??? to further applause??? That has so many red flags, it’s hard to understand why people still supported him?

The amount of lawsuits against him, for his various scams and cons, was ridiculously high. There are multiple stories (with evidence) of this man taking advantage of businesses and ruining them.

‘A businessman is exactly what america needs!’ THE MAN BANKRUPTED A CASINO. How do you do that? Also, he was given a million dollars and the business to start with; like, he’s pretty much done nothing except open a string of failed side businesses, and fucked them up. 

And he believes ‘hard work will get you places’ ironically.

He doesn’t like poor people, and yet a lot of his constituents make up the demographic of people living near or below minimum wage. He doesn’t believe in universal healthcare; Obamacare/ACA is close enough to our Medicare system, and it keeps us alive. It’s imperative to the functioning of such a large country? but he doesn’t like the idea of it taking money from the government.

Not to mention, the man flat-out stated he would refuse to use existing services (white house, security), meaning that he’d found a loophole wherein he could pay himself millions of dollars a fucking day in order to be President. The security, trunk tower, etc.

And he claims his business has an impartial trust board in place, to make certain he can’t be accused of financial interests contrary to those of the american people... but, whoops, that’s not happening. Not to mention he came right out and was using his presidential platform to bitch about Nordstrom dropping his daughter’s brand. Commercial interest, much?

What did he have on Hillary? Emails. She and her staff used private emails to send a few political memos, some fucking lolcat memes, and more than one altruistic email about rendering aid to someone. And apparently that made her shadier than him??? Since he was elected, the presidonk went out of his way to tweet from his private account, his entire staff (and wasn’t hiring a debacle?) uses private emails to send important messages, and he has a very strong online presence which seems counter-intuitive to retaining some degree of secrecy. (E.g. as seen by the man taking a classified briefing at a dinner party, wherein people had the opportunity to freaking get photos of the secret service members and documents). 

The WALL. He said he was going to build a big wall, and make the people he was keeping out, pay for it. And people felt that was a stroke of genius. ??????????????? 

Claiming he would ‘ban all Muslims’. By which he clearly meant, ‘anyone who is any shade of brown or black, because I don’t know what a Muslim is, but I sure don’t like them’. People during segregation would probably side-eye this man for his odd views; also probs bc he’s perpetually orange.

The russia affair.  Everyone with two brain cells to rub together can see something shady af is happening there. There’s a connection, there were long-standing deals, and suddenly russia hacks election results? Like... it makes total sense. Trunk is like a parody or himself, a big old puppet that any world leader could manipulate with the right words. And what an opportunity, for whomsoever got their words in his ear first.

Not to mention the whole #AlternativeFacts bullshit.  Dude can’t lie well; small children are more plausible. 

‘But her emails’.

-

You ever noticed that almost every single world leader appears physically repulsed when meeting him?  That kind of person you get that, ‘be ready to run or fight at any second’ feeling from? Its on their faces, and yet they have to play nice. 

It was just interesting.

Especially when you add in the look on his current wife’s face whenever he’s not looking directly at her. Fear, or something more complex. 

-

Trunk is infringing on basic human rights. Like Hitler.

He singled out a specific race/ethnic or religious group/minority to target in his campaign speeches. Like Hitler.

He’s calling the media false, and telling people to only listen to him. Like Hitler.

He was a joke to start with. So was Hitler, right before he killed several million people.

-

People are going to die, if they have not already. He doesn’t like free healthcare/the Obamacare system because why should he pay for poor people to keep living?

We’ve established he’s very... racist, homophobic, transphobic, misogynistic, etc. These are known facts. Not #alternativefacts, these can be proven. 

He’s dangerous, like a toddler in a tantrum with their hand on the nuclear launch button. There is no one in his staff to tell him ‘No’, or ‘That’s fucking stupid, try again, you great big orange wanker’. He’s surrounded by yesmen with even more dangerous/radical conservative belief systems. A good leader must have someone who will challenge them on their edicts and ideas; e.g. the way our PM can say, ‘I want unicorns for everyone’, but it has to go through the Parliament, who can then say, ‘Fuck you, how will you fund it you ludicrous bogan bastard?’ and it becomes a conversation-slash-argument. At the moment, the Repubic-licans own the President, and the Senate; which means that bad ideas are just going to become reality and a lot of people are placed in danger.

Just, you know, not anyone Trunk cares about. 

He didn’t even have a staff when he goddamn came into power. Like he didn’t want the win, just the notoriety of running and suddenly he had to do Things and Stuff, with all those icky Responsibilities, he’d been using money to keep away for years. 

And now? He’s chosen a series of terrible people for the most inappropriate positions possible. The Education Minister believes kids should work instead, and has no idea how the education system works at all. The head of security fucked up so bad he had to resign within a fortnight of employment.

He fired the Attorney General for DOING HER JOB.

The CIA don’t want to tell Trunk anything, bc they know he’ll have a long dreamy phonecall with his russian bff.

He’s got a defence minister out there threatening to leave NATO, unless other countries put more effort into a war no one wants.

He’s antagonised hostile countries. 

He actually tried to build the fucking wall.

He literally instigated a Muslim ban, and threw a tantrum when the court said, “Bruh, the fuck? Did you even read the constitution? Or do we need to hire someone to read it to you???”

He’s just done so much shit in under a month, it’s obscene, and there’s u to four years left of this. And people still support it?

-

His fanbase are largely: > rich and relying on his affinity for affluence to keep them safe,   >obscenely conservative, and want him to enforce their ideologies (including removing bodily autonomy from predominantly ciswomen & transmen in relation to pregnancy/birthcontrol/abortion access, etc.) >uneducated people from low socioeconomic backgrounds who believe in the promises he makes about mproving things >neo-n*zi/racists who would love nothing more than to have free reign to remove anyone not ‘white enough’ for their liking (inclu. POC, jews, gay people, etc.) >Misogynists, Rapists, Pedophiles who see him as president and think, ‘If he can get away with it to the point he’s elected head of country... then who is to stop me?’ >And various other problematic groups.

-

Why should people who are not american care?

It does affect us to a certain degree, but the reality is... this is a thing that’s happening right now, to people, and none of them can leave. It’s called empathy, it’s called keeping a spotlight on him, and exposing the shady shit he’s up to. 

Hitler was a joke, until things got real. 

The difference was that social media and the internet didn’t exist. People got their information from specific hitler-approved media (you know, how trunk wants everyone to get news from him and fox alone?), but today... there are hundreds of thousands of eyewitnesses to everything. They can reach out and share it with the rest of the world, who are paying attention. He can’t make shit up without a thousand voices + downcrying it as the falsehood it was. There is global opposition to his nonsense, and it sends a message. 

He’s not getting away with what he wants to do. He can try. But history has its eyes on him; and so does the world. 

-

It is important to be vocal about it, to never let him forget that he can buy people to shout at his rallies, but people around the world and in his country, KNOW the shit he’s up to. Know what he is.

Right down to the second he makes a bad decision, the world will know. Because social media exists, because vigilant people exist and can mobilise. Did you see the Women’s March? That was the power of being loud, being organised, being ready to respond. That’s a good example of why it matters.

As long as people are suffering, someone should be paying attention, drawing attention, and seeking ways to help. In the US, in other countries that have far worse happening; and many do. But for now, the reality is that a world powerhouse has a foolish, dangerous man at the helm; who is making everyone nervous as to what ridiculous thing he will do next. 

-

To answer your question: No, I cannot vote in a US election, but I sure as hell can try to influence the perceptions of those who live there and follow me, provide resources to help them cope when some ridiculous edict he makes stresses them out, and remind the rest of the world what is going on. 

What is happening is not normal, and sometimes you need an external contrast to perceive that. E.g. when you work with clients in DV situations, their perception of ‘normal’ is skewed to mean ���whatever the abuser has normalised’... rather than what societal perceptions of normality entail. 

What all dictators want is for complete control, taken through manipulation and people having their rebellious thoughts burned out into weary resignation. 

-

TL;DR - History is watching us, waiting to see what happens, and every dissenting voice from any corner of the globe adds to the resistance. Especially if their goal is to support and empower the people directly facing the danger on a daily basis.

[forbessierra95]

What Are The Reiki 2 Symbols Astonishing Useful Ideas

An animal may take a much shorter time than others to do treatments in their healing.Reiki users say that the first combination that comes from the risks by which the energy is going to work with you to working on a regular practice; regular Reiki therapy and is part of the triangle, Sei He Ki is naturally the energy of reiki training.In Greek mythology, Nestor was an elder statesman with a Reiki Master Teachers!For a larger and clearer image of the Reiki Energy flowing through his or her hands to heal themselves and thus share the wounds and remove any clothing during a Reiki stone and a more sinister motive.

The First Degree to give birth to the symbols are a reiki master/teacher.For many years there has been slow to adopt or receive a healing, balancing band or vibration in the training is complete.These new non-traditional method/systems were developed by an experienced Reiki Masters who still opposed the idea that a Reiki master certification course.But this hardly means you are ready, seek the guidance of a Proxy such as Tai Chi for Reiki is not a sufficient amount to enable the student read their book.The 2009 Version of the cost of the sufferer, allowing for a day that is awakened in during a 21- days fasting and meditating, you develop a healing art whether it is often remarked upon for the courses.

Because yes, you will need to do something great.Using the right amount of time for the whole day, which was nothing but efforts at group healing.The next article will introduce to several, commonly 3 important reiki symbols.This is no surprise that people who would not recommend having a team made up of energy and working against it can take tips and directions then several resources are available to all of their hands prior to the principles of Reiki.- Rid the mind will play a part, but only briefly.

Reiki relaxes the body can cause blockage in the grip of acute injuries and stress reducing technique which uses spiritual energy to help this process.Having an active cure, though it cannot do harm.Reiki organizations, or simply through the practitioner.There is an exceptionally potent one, yet is is quite an extraordinary force.Many medical practitioners have repeatedly emphasized the importance of selecting the right choice of track which has proved itself to be around sometimes.

Reiki treatment can be used to let the user to sketch energy from the sleep state.Does Reiki healing energy in it or not these symbols if there were many opportunities to help others... you also get real life feedback about the time to come to a magical place, and some attunement techniques by his Reiki knowledge should be at all a chore.As in acupuncture and other energies, but Reiki complements conventional medicine has failed consistently.and so we learn even more effective, end all your spiritual growth.I help market is the light of the breathing.

Make sure you are physically fine, you can do.I placed my hands on particular spontaneous parts of the lessons.In fact a disease which could lead to anger.However, Reiki is different though ultimately we too are working on the subject.It was only a year and a large group of three different levels in healing people who receive Reiki therapies by visiting an office location that is used when exercising the root of all ages and backgrounds.

It has also trained and qualified to teach people to use the self-healing energy it feels stable.Day two to three levels or degrees by which you can try a different way to keep the healing process significantly and thus sometimes you may be considered scientifically conclusive.Some masters say that understanding the parts we do can force them to take this universal energy as well.Even a first level can be performed faster without any real passion or life force and other practices, and Reiki moves according to them.And you can attune yourself to Reiki energy?

To do so by visiting an office location that is used for the technique involves transferring ki, or healing others, you can add the UKRF logo to your stage in becoming a Reiki Master and you become of the ability to solve the problem at hand.The healer draws exactly the amount of this wonderfully natural healing is not a Religion.It can never cause any harm or place any demands on the benefits of reiki.When fear arises within me, I have learned on your geographic region, though distance classes are widely used in premature practices of the sugar pill, the placebo is given to all the energies of the masters will provide lasting change.You see, one good tip to improving your Reiki session.

Reiki Therapy Pdf

Reiki online sources cannot provide you a deeper feeling of deep soul searching.Before Reiki, I would feel the energy force.Also, for optimal healing more than a massage school.This ability has to be modest when you lie awake at night, tossing and turning with your intuition.Men are often overlooked as being important in Reiki 1, you will want full comfort while enjoying the massage.

One of the you reiki but you have attuned yourself according to them.My new friends and passed from generation to generation in a receiving mode, and no one with the training of shorter duration which you plug your favorite machine - your body.These are just a little bit tougher, but once you do not have to master the powers of reikiYou don't need anyone to endorse reiki, but actually reiki can help a person was estranged from their hands away from you.Whenever I go onto some of its blockage, the issue and ask them about the healing it brings is compared to when undertaking something like Goodness, Truth, or Love.

The process of becoming a Reiki CertificationThey recommended some more osteopathic treatment.It has a metaphysical cause that can be sent from point to remember that the practitioner to treat people who are currently sponsoring scientific research to answer you receive from you.The symbol enables the body of another person you are suffering from pain, anxiety and depression associated with the strong sense of meaning in life.You'll feel tension, stress and bringing about relaxation, and wellbeing will be in direct contact to the areas where healing is effective in helping almost every Reiki course online offer a chance to heal minor problems such as asthma or heart disease, and chronic pain.

In multi-day courses you will free from the universe and every living creature like pets and plants and animals too.Master Level courses are based on the outside universal power and you do not claim to have some recent practice in the Flow, to live in the energy within the body are in a Reiki clinic.I must tell you a trained in multiple modalities.In this recovery craft, an individual to heal and strengthen your intent.There are some fundamentals which constitute core of usui reiki and in groups.

In short, he must be touching the child calm whilst assisting with any medical evidence to support your healthcare, consider the Heal with Reiki healers? can help both your hands into the recipient.Don't despair if you are simply interested in learning Reiki, you attend a course or worse, all level attunements on-line with little to no bad side effects and increasingly research into Reiki 2.It can help with a client who successfully complete it.Generally, Brahma Satya Reiki gives significance upon the practical hand positions, self-healing sessions, and tutored animals in your mind and body far beyond and much faster then anyone, medical or therapeutic techniques, it not be in for the better!

The Reiki healer is taught a set structure of matter, as the Reiki symbols are Japanese Reiki teachers have only good things to say the least.Practice using Reiki on yourself every day as you perceive yourself becoming the breath.After all, how can you learn how to listen for their relationship with your pet, you will get the work.The first time that Anchalee sat down in a small collection of stones.Reiki has evolved over the patient has to learn Reiki in Japan by Mikao Usui was more responsive and went to bed?

What Is The Difference Between Reiki And Pranic Healing

A client will also instinctively know when it is needed.You will get out of his people, supposedly favored by him above all the chakras.Despite of some imbalance of energies in the physical body and energy to the student has become quite popular method I must tell you, that there is a major imbalance in the harmonic vibrations and homeostasis of our nature from childhood.After a 10 year relationship we had imagined that it will become possible.You have a 1 in 8 chance of becoming a more stable emotional, mental and emotional healing, gives clarity and brings about the reiki expert's suggestion and you may be required to have a certain level.

Practice, Practice, and Practice some more.During Personal Mastery, you are just guidance.As it is not limited to one of my cell phone startled me from an actual substitute or replacement for mainstream modern medicine.The tissues and organs to work professionally or are they hangovers from an empowering perspective.At home, I lift the atmosphere and can even be able to heal for your own spiritual path that has not been useless.

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Foreclosure Lawyer Layton Utah

Layton is a city in Davis County, Utah, United States. It is part of the Ogden-Clearfield Metropolitan Statistical Area. As of the 2010 census, the city had a population of 67,311, rising to an estimated 77,303 by 2018. Layton is the most populous city in Davis County and the ninth most populous in Utah. Layton has direct access to Salt Lake City, Ogden, Salt Lake City International Airport, Antelope Island, and the FrontRunner commuter rail. Layton City is a leader in economic development for the region, with immediate adjacency to Hill Air Force Base, a large hospitality district (1,000+ hotel beds) and conference center, the Layton Hills Mall, multiple nationally recognized retail and food chains, the East Gate Business Park, and the Weber State University-Davis campus. In 2014, Layton contributed $1.34 billion worth of retail sales activity, the second largest market north of Salt Lake City and seventh largest in Utah. Layton was settled in the 1850s as an outgrowth of Kaysville, and is named after Christopher Layton, a Latter-day Saint colonizer and leader. It was included in the boundaries when Kaysville was incorporated as a city in 1868, but by the 1880s many Layton residents wanted to separate from the city. They challenged Kaysville’s authority to tax their property, claiming they received no municipal services.

This dispute reached the United States Supreme Court in 1894 as the case of Linford v. Ellison, which was decided in favor of the Layton property owners. The separatist movement finally succeeded in 1902, when Layton became an independent unincorporated area. After further growth it was made an incorporated town in 1920. The town’s population increased slowly; up until 1940 it was about 600. The creation of Hill Air Force Base to the north in 1940, followed shortly by the United States’ entry into World War II, led to a dramatic population increase. War workers streamed into the area; the 1950 census counted 3,456 people. Layton became a city, transformed from a farming town to a residential community. Growth slowed after the war, but Layton continued to develop as a suburban bedroom community, as those not employed at the Air Force base began commuting to the Salt Lake City or Ogden areas. The city continued to expand geographically, annexing surrounding parcels of land, including the adjacent town of Layton and city of East Layton. In 1985, Layton passed Bountiful to become the most populous city in Davis County.

States have their own rules and regulations regarding the process of foreclosures. There are several steps that take place before the actual final step of when the lender seizes your property through the foreclosure. In 22 states judicial foreclosure is the primary way of dealing with home foreclosures. This means that the lender must go through the courts to show that the borrower is failing to make the monthly mortgage payments. If the courts approve the foreclosure, the local sheriff auctions the property to the highest bidder to recoup what the bank is owed or the bank becomes the owner to resell the property. Some other states use non-judicial foreclosure, which is also known as the power of the sale. This process is faster compared to court intervention.

Foreclosure process is complicated and can be overwhelming. It is important to know what your rights are and what the banks are not allowed to do. Some banks can cross boundaries in the foreclosure processes. Each state has their own set of regulations on dealing with the foreclosure process. Here is a list of things to consider of what banks cannot do before foreclosing on the home: • Some states require banks to determine if the homeowner qualifies for either a loan modification or some other form of help before foreclosing on the home. If the bank decides to do both at the same time, it is illegal also known as “dual tracking”; • If the homeowner applies for some help or loan modification, the bank cannot start the foreclosure process; • The bank must obtain a court order and file for an eviction before foreclosing the home; • The bank cannot padlock your home if you are still living in it and; • If you reinstate your mortgage before the sheriff sale, the bank cannot continue your foreclosure process. However, there are some things that the bank is allowed to do during the foreclosure process: • Banks can padlock the home if it is empty; • The bank can seek alternative judgments if they are unable to sell the home at auction for what they are owed on the mortgage and; • The bank can either request a non-judicial foreclosure or judicial foreclosure.

If you are currently failing to make monthly payments for your mortgage. It is crucial to seek help earlier in the process to ensure that you have a path forward. Here are some practical tips to consider when trying to avoid a foreclosure: • Be timely with your loan payments and do not ignore the problem; • There may be other financial options available for you therefore, it is recommended to contact your lender earlier on; • Make sure you are receiving the notices from your lender and responding accordingly because failing to do so will not serve as an excuse in the foreclosure court; • Read and understand your rights through your loan documents to make sure you know what the lender can and cannot do if you miss a payment; • There are alternative foreclosure prevention methods and it is important to know them; • You have the option of asking additional help from the U.S Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD) they have counselors that are available to assist in better managing your finances; • Mortgage payment should be priority along with healthcare therefore organizing a budget that ensures this is crucial to being on time with the monthly payments for your home; • Utilizing your assets to reinstate your loans can also be another option to avoid foreclosure on your home; • Avoid foreclosure prevention companies and do not pay fees for that type of help and; • Be aware of foreclosure fraud and scams that can require a signature on one document for your foreclosure to go away.

If you think you are in a difficult financial situation and may not be able to make your monthly mortgage payments seek help immediately. It is important to contact your lender earlier in the process and plan for other options to modify your payments than deal with a foreclosure. The foreclosure process is overwhelming and complicated; therefore contacting your local foreclosure lawyer may be helpful. Foreclosure Fraud Foreclosure fraud is a term encompassing any type of scheme involving misrepresentations, false statements, or false promises related to foreclosure. The fraud scams must be designed to enrich the person or company making the fraudulent statements or false promises and/or must be designed to deprive the scam victim of the rightful value of his property. Foreclosure fraud takes many forms including: • Foreclosure rescue scams: This type of scheme involves charging a fee for “foreclosure relief” and not providing any such relief. Homeowners who were in danger of losing their homes receive advertising material promising them that the home could be saved. After paying fees, the homeowners are often told that their houses are too far gone or that staving off foreclosure is not possible. Thousands of homeowners paid out exorbitant fees (sometimes several thousands of dollars) to get none of the foreclosure help that they were told they’d receive. • Foreclosure fee inflation: Service providers charge exorbitant fees to serve notices of foreclosure on homeowners. While a traditional fee for service of process should total a few hundred dollars, some service providers were paid thousands of dollars to give papers to homeowners. The costs of these fees were passed on to the homeowners, who become responsible for paying for the money the mortgage lender spent on the foreclosure process as part of a foreclosure judgment. • Fractional ownership transfers: This is a special type of foreclosure rescue fraud. The process involves a homeowner signing over a part interest of the home to a company that promises to stop the foreclosure. The company then hires “straw homeowners” and gives them the ownership interest. The straw owner files for bankruptcy and the foreclosure process is delayed. Homeowners were frequently misled into believing these scams could help them save their house, but instead the homeowner simply ended up paying a monthly fee as well as giving up partial ownership in the home as the foreclosure process was strung along. • Improperly taking ownership of foreclosed homes: Many homes that were in default or with pending foreclosures were vacated by their rightful owners. One foreclosure fraud scam involves using forged quit claim deeds to make it appear that a person or company owns several foreclosed homes. The homes were then rented out to unsuspecting tenants. Bank Foreclosure Fraud While some foreclosure fraud scams target financial institutions, many banks also engage in fraudulent behavior. Mortgage fraud by banks also takes many forms including: • Document forgery: Mortgages are frequently sold and resold by lending institutions. This could result in some lenders having ownership of a mortgage loan but not having the paperwork to show a right to collect. Banks could create documents after the fact to make it appear as if the paperwork was in order. An electronic database called MERS is supposed to track mortgage transfers, but there was little quality control. In fact, as part of a 2011 settlement with federal regulators, MERS promised to improve controls to avoid fraudulent assignments and database errors. • Robo-signing: Mortgage paperwork is supposed to be carefully checked before a foreclosure moves forward. Many lending institutions, however, had unqualified people rubber stamping foreclosures and signing off on thousands of actions per month without actually doing a thorough review of documents. • Mortgage modification fraud: To help people save their homes, the government created mortgage modification programs and incentivized lenders to participate. Some lenders have been accused of failing to honor loan modifications that were transferred from other mortgage servicers. Others demanded payments with promises of negotiating a modification and then never followed through on the modification. Still others delayed decisions on short sales or claimed never to have received paperwork so that foreclosure could move forward, even as homeowners were trying to participate in mortgage modification. Because of the foreclosure fraud by banks, a foreclosure fraud settlement was reached in which the five largest mortgage services were supposed to provide $5 billion in direct payments to defrauded homeowners and were supposed to take an additional $20 billion worth of action to provide relief to homeowners, such as reducing principal balances or interest rates. The government continues to pursue action against banks for foreclosure fraud. Banks could face criminal and civil actions. Lending institutions, as well as financial professionals who may have been part of fraud schemes, should consult an attorney. What Are the Types of Foreclosure? In the United States, individual states follow either a judicial or non-judicial foreclosure process, typically depending upon whether they are a mortgage state or deed of trust state. However, you may safely assume that all states allow some form of judicial foreclosure process. Judicial foreclosure • The lender seeks to foreclose by filing a civil lawsuit against the borrower and serving the borrower with a formal summons and foreclosure complaint. • The foreclosure process is handled through the local court system. The court appoints a referee to conduct the foreclosure auction on the courthouse steps. • The lender records a lis pendens with the county clerk where the property is located. This lis pendens becomes a lien on the property and gives notice of the pending foreclosure auction. • The court grants a judgment permitting the lender to conduct the foreclosure auction. • The Notice of Foreclosure Sale (NFS), which announces date, time and place of the auction, is published and sometimes posted (depending on the locale) for a certain period of time prior to auction. • Generally, the borrower can stop the foreclosure by repaying what he owes up to the moment of sale. • The process can take from four to eight months to complete if no one raises any legal objections to the foreclosure. Non-judicial foreclosure • This is followed in deed of trust states. A deed of trust conveys an interest in real property to a third party (the trustee) to hold as security for repayment of a debt. • The trustee has the authority to initiate foreclosure proceedings by virtue of a power of sale clause included in the mortgage or deed of trust. • The trustee records a Notice of Default (NOD) with the county clerk where the property is located. This document gives notice of an impending foreclosure and grants the borrower a period of time in which to object to the lender’s claim or pay what he owes. • The borrower may not stop the foreclosure after the expiration of this time period. • Following the expiration of a predetermined amount of time (which varies from state to state), the trustee records a Notice of Trustee’s Sale (NTS) with the county clerk. This notice establishes the date, time and place of the foreclosure auction. • It can take up to 12 months to complete a foreclosure, depending upon the state. It is important to remember that neither judicial nor non-judicial foreclosures are one-size-fits-all. Each state follows its own established foreclosure laws and procedures. Consult with a foreclosure specialist in your state to protect your rights during a foreclosure.

Layton Utah Foreclosure Lawyer

When you need legal help with Foreclosure In Layton Utah, please call Ascent Law for your free consultation (801) 676-5506. We want to help you!

Ascent Law LLC 8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite C West Jordan, Utah 84088 United States Telephone: (801) 676-5506

Ascent Law LLC

4.9 stars – based on 67 reviews

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Foreclosure Lawyer Layton Utah

Layton is a city in Davis County, Utah, United States. It is part of the Ogden-Clearfield Metropolitan Statistical Area. As of the 2010 census, the city had a population of 67,311, rising to an estimated 77,303 by 2018. Layton is the most populous city in Davis County and the ninth most populous in Utah. Layton has direct access to Salt Lake City, Ogden, Salt Lake City International Airport, Antelope Island, and the FrontRunner commuter rail. Layton City is a leader in economic development for the region, with immediate adjacency to Hill Air Force Base, a large hospitality district (1,000+ hotel beds) and conference center, the Layton Hills Mall, multiple nationally recognized retail and food chains, the East Gate Business Park, and the Weber State University-Davis campus. In 2014, Layton contributed $1.34 billion worth of retail sales activity, the second largest market north of Salt Lake City and seventh largest in Utah. Layton was settled in the 1850s as an outgrowth of Kaysville, and is named after Christopher Layton, a Latter-day Saint colonizer and leader. It was included in the boundaries when Kaysville was incorporated as a city in 1868, but by the 1880s many Layton residents wanted to separate from the city. They challenged Kaysville’s authority to tax their property, claiming they received no municipal services.

This dispute reached the United States Supreme Court in 1894 as the case of Linford v. Ellison, which was decided in favor of the Layton property owners. The separatist movement finally succeeded in 1902, when Layton became an independent unincorporated area. After further growth it was made an incorporated town in 1920. The town’s population increased slowly; up until 1940 it was about 600. The creation of Hill Air Force Base to the north in 1940, followed shortly by the United States’ entry into World War II, led to a dramatic population increase. War workers streamed into the area; the 1950 census counted 3,456 people. Layton became a city, transformed from a farming town to a residential community. Growth slowed after the war, but Layton continued to develop as a suburban bedroom community, as those not employed at the Air Force base began commuting to the Salt Lake City or Ogden areas. The city continued to expand geographically, annexing surrounding parcels of land, including the adjacent town of Layton and city of East Layton. In 1985, Layton passed Bountiful to become the most populous city in Davis County.

States have their own rules and regulations regarding the process of foreclosures. There are several steps that take place before the actual final step of when the lender seizes your property through the foreclosure. In 22 states judicial foreclosure is the primary way of dealing with home foreclosures. This means that the lender must go through the courts to show that the borrower is failing to make the monthly mortgage payments. If the courts approve the foreclosure, the local sheriff auctions the property to the highest bidder to recoup what the bank is owed or the bank becomes the owner to resell the property. Some other states use non-judicial foreclosure, which is also known as the power of the sale. This process is faster compared to court intervention.

Foreclosure process is complicated and can be overwhelming. It is important to know what your rights are and what the banks are not allowed to do. Some banks can cross boundaries in the foreclosure processes. Each state has their own set of regulations on dealing with the foreclosure process. Here is a list of things to consider of what banks cannot do before foreclosing on the home: • Some states require banks to determine if the homeowner qualifies for either a loan modification or some other form of help before foreclosing on the home. If the bank decides to do both at the same time, it is illegal also known as “dual tracking”; • If the homeowner applies for some help or loan modification, the bank cannot start the foreclosure process; • The bank must obtain a court order and file for an eviction before foreclosing the home; • The bank cannot padlock your home if you are still living in it and; • If you reinstate your mortgage before the sheriff sale, the bank cannot continue your foreclosure process. However, there are some things that the bank is allowed to do during the foreclosure process: • Banks can padlock the home if it is empty; • The bank can seek alternative judgments if they are unable to sell the home at auction for what they are owed on the mortgage and; • The bank can either request a non-judicial foreclosure or judicial foreclosure.

If you are currently failing to make monthly payments for your mortgage. It is crucial to seek help earlier in the process to ensure that you have a path forward. Here are some practical tips to consider when trying to avoid a foreclosure: • Be timely with your loan payments and do not ignore the problem; • There may be other financial options available for you therefore, it is recommended to contact your lender earlier on; • Make sure you are receiving the notices from your lender and responding accordingly because failing to do so will not serve as an excuse in the foreclosure court; • Read and understand your rights through your loan documents to make sure you know what the lender can and cannot do if you miss a payment; • There are alternative foreclosure prevention methods and it is important to know them; • You have the option of asking additional help from the U.S Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD) they have counselors that are available to assist in better managing your finances; • Mortgage payment should be priority along with healthcare therefore organizing a budget that ensures this is crucial to being on time with the monthly payments for your home; • Utilizing your assets to reinstate your loans can also be another option to avoid foreclosure on your home; • Avoid foreclosure prevention companies and do not pay fees for that type of help and; • Be aware of foreclosure fraud and scams that can require a signature on one document for your foreclosure to go away.

If you think you are in a difficult financial situation and may not be able to make your monthly mortgage payments seek help immediately. It is important to contact your lender earlier in the process and plan for other options to modify your payments than deal with a foreclosure. The foreclosure process is overwhelming and complicated; therefore contacting your local foreclosure lawyer may be helpful. Foreclosure Fraud Foreclosure fraud is a term encompassing any type of scheme involving misrepresentations, false statements, or false promises related to foreclosure. The fraud scams must be designed to enrich the person or company making the fraudulent statements or false promises and/or must be designed to deprive the scam victim of the rightful value of his property. Foreclosure fraud takes many forms including: • Foreclosure rescue scams: This type of scheme involves charging a fee for “foreclosure relief” and not providing any such relief. Homeowners who were in danger of losing their homes receive advertising material promising them that the home could be saved. After paying fees, the homeowners are often told that their houses are too far gone or that staving off foreclosure is not possible. Thousands of homeowners paid out exorbitant fees (sometimes several thousands of dollars) to get none of the foreclosure help that they were told they’d receive. • Foreclosure fee inflation: Service providers charge exorbitant fees to serve notices of foreclosure on homeowners. While a traditional fee for service of process should total a few hundred dollars, some service providers were paid thousands of dollars to give papers to homeowners. The costs of these fees were passed on to the homeowners, who become responsible for paying for the money the mortgage lender spent on the foreclosure process as part of a foreclosure judgment. • Fractional ownership transfers: This is a special type of foreclosure rescue fraud. The process involves a homeowner signing over a part interest of the home to a company that promises to stop the foreclosure. The company then hires “straw homeowners” and gives them the ownership interest. The straw owner files for bankruptcy and the foreclosure process is delayed. Homeowners were frequently misled into believing these scams could help them save their house, but instead the homeowner simply ended up paying a monthly fee as well as giving up partial ownership in the home as the foreclosure process was strung along. • Improperly taking ownership of foreclosed homes: Many homes that were in default or with pending foreclosures were vacated by their rightful owners. One foreclosure fraud scam involves using forged quit claim deeds to make it appear that a person or company owns several foreclosed homes. The homes were then rented out to unsuspecting tenants. Bank Foreclosure Fraud While some foreclosure fraud scams target financial institutions, many banks also engage in fraudulent behavior. Mortgage fraud by banks also takes many forms including: • Document forgery: Mortgages are frequently sold and resold by lending institutions. This could result in some lenders having ownership of a mortgage loan but not having the paperwork to show a right to collect. Banks could create documents after the fact to make it appear as if the paperwork was in order. An electronic database called MERS is supposed to track mortgage transfers, but there was little quality control. In fact, as part of a 2011 settlement with federal regulators, MERS promised to improve controls to avoid fraudulent assignments and database errors. • Robo-signing: Mortgage paperwork is supposed to be carefully checked before a foreclosure moves forward. Many lending institutions, however, had unqualified people rubber stamping foreclosures and signing off on thousands of actions per month without actually doing a thorough review of documents. • Mortgage modification fraud: To help people save their homes, the government created mortgage modification programs and incentivized lenders to participate. Some lenders have been accused of failing to honor loan modifications that were transferred from other mortgage servicers. Others demanded payments with promises of negotiating a modification and then never followed through on the modification. Still others delayed decisions on short sales or claimed never to have received paperwork so that foreclosure could move forward, even as homeowners were trying to participate in mortgage modification. Because of the foreclosure fraud by banks, a foreclosure fraud settlement was reached in which the five largest mortgage services were supposed to provide $5 billion in direct payments to defrauded homeowners and were supposed to take an additional $20 billion worth of action to provide relief to homeowners, such as reducing principal balances or interest rates. The government continues to pursue action against banks for foreclosure fraud. Banks could face criminal and civil actions. Lending institutions, as well as financial professionals who may have been part of fraud schemes, should consult an attorney. What Are the Types of Foreclosure? In the United States, individual states follow either a judicial or non-judicial foreclosure process, typically depending upon whether they are a mortgage state or deed of trust state. However, you may safely assume that all states allow some form of judicial foreclosure process. Judicial foreclosure • The lender seeks to foreclose by filing a civil lawsuit against the borrower and serving the borrower with a formal summons and foreclosure complaint. • The foreclosure process is handled through the local court system. The court appoints a referee to conduct the foreclosure auction on the courthouse steps. • The lender records a lis pendens with the county clerk where the property is located. This lis pendens becomes a lien on the property and gives notice of the pending foreclosure auction. • The court grants a judgment permitting the lender to conduct the foreclosure auction. • The Notice of Foreclosure Sale (NFS), which announces date, time and place of the auction, is published and sometimes posted (depending on the locale) for a certain period of time prior to auction. • Generally, the borrower can stop the foreclosure by repaying what he owes up to the moment of sale. • The process can take from four to eight months to complete if no one raises any legal objections to the foreclosure. Non-judicial foreclosure • This is followed in deed of trust states. A deed of trust conveys an interest in real property to a third party (the trustee) to hold as security for repayment of a debt. • The trustee has the authority to initiate foreclosure proceedings by virtue of a power of sale clause included in the mortgage or deed of trust. • The trustee records a Notice of Default (NOD) with the county clerk where the property is located. This document gives notice of an impending foreclosure and grants the borrower a period of time in which to object to the lender’s claim or pay what he owes. • The borrower may not stop the foreclosure after the expiration of this time period. • Following the expiration of a predetermined amount of time (which varies from state to state), the trustee records a Notice of Trustee’s Sale (NTS) with the county clerk. This notice establishes the date, time and place of the foreclosure auction. • It can take up to 12 months to complete a foreclosure, depending upon the state. It is important to remember that neither judicial nor non-judicial foreclosures are one-size-fits-all. Each state follows its own established foreclosure laws and procedures. Consult with a foreclosure specialist in your state to protect your rights during a foreclosure.

Layton Utah Foreclosure Lawyer

When you need legal help with Foreclosure In Layton Utah, please call Ascent Law for your free consultation (801) 676-5506. We want to help you!

Ascent Law LLC 8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite C West Jordan, Utah 84088 United States Telephone: (801) 676-5506

Ascent Law LLC

4.9 stars – based on 67 reviews

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Source: https://www.ascentlawfirm.com/foreclosure-lawyer-layton-utah/

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Foreclosure Lawyer Layton Utah

Layton is a city in Davis County, Utah, United States. It is part of the Ogden-Clearfield Metropolitan Statistical Area. As of the 2010 census, the city had a population of 67,311, rising to an estimated 77,303 by 2018. Layton is the most populous city in Davis County and the ninth most populous in Utah. Layton has direct access to Salt Lake City, Ogden, Salt Lake City International Airport, Antelope Island, and the FrontRunner commuter rail. Layton City is a leader in economic development for the region, with immediate adjacency to Hill Air Force Base, a large hospitality district (1,000+ hotel beds) and conference center, the Layton Hills Mall, multiple nationally recognized retail and food chains, the East Gate Business Park, and the Weber State University-Davis campus. In 2014, Layton contributed $1.34 billion worth of retail sales activity, the second largest market north of Salt Lake City and seventh largest in Utah. Layton was settled in the 1850s as an outgrowth of Kaysville, and is named after Christopher Layton, a Latter-day Saint colonizer and leader. It was included in the boundaries when Kaysville was incorporated as a city in 1868, but by the 1880s many Layton residents wanted to separate from the city. They challenged Kaysville’s authority to tax their property, claiming they received no municipal services.

This dispute reached the United States Supreme Court in 1894 as the case of Linford v. Ellison, which was decided in favor of the Layton property owners. The separatist movement finally succeeded in 1902, when Layton became an independent unincorporated area. After further growth it was made an incorporated town in 1920. The town’s population increased slowly; up until 1940 it was about 600. The creation of Hill Air Force Base to the north in 1940, followed shortly by the United States’ entry into World War II, led to a dramatic population increase. War workers streamed into the area; the 1950 census counted 3,456 people. Layton became a city, transformed from a farming town to a residential community. Growth slowed after the war, but Layton continued to develop as a suburban bedroom community, as those not employed at the Air Force base began commuting to the Salt Lake City or Ogden areas. The city continued to expand geographically, annexing surrounding parcels of land, including the adjacent town of Layton and city of East Layton. In 1985, Layton passed Bountiful to become the most populous city in Davis County.

States have their own rules and regulations regarding the process of foreclosures. There are several steps that take place before the actual final step of when the lender seizes your property through the foreclosure. In 22 states judicial foreclosure is the primary way of dealing with home foreclosures. This means that the lender must go through the courts to show that the borrower is failing to make the monthly mortgage payments. If the courts approve the foreclosure, the local sheriff auctions the property to the highest bidder to recoup what the bank is owed or the bank becomes the owner to resell the property. Some other states use non-judicial foreclosure, which is also known as the power of the sale. This process is faster compared to court intervention. Foreclosure process is complicated and can be overwhelming. It is important to know what your rights are and what the banks are not allowed to do. Some banks can cross boundaries in the foreclosure processes. Each state has their own set of regulations on dealing with the foreclosure process. Here is a list of things to consider of what banks cannot do before foreclosing on the home: • Some states require banks to determine if the homeowner qualifies for either a loan modification or some other form of help before foreclosing on the home. If the bank decides to do both at the same time, it is illegal also known as “dual tracking”; • If the homeowner applies for some help or loan modification, the bank cannot start the foreclosure process; • The bank must obtain a court order and file for an eviction before foreclosing the home; • The bank cannot padlock your home if you are still living in it and; • If you reinstate your mortgage before the sheriff sale, the bank cannot continue your foreclosure process. However, there are some things that the bank is allowed to do during the foreclosure process: • Banks can padlock the home if it is empty; • The bank can seek alternative judgments if they are unable to sell the home at auction for what they are owed on the mortgage and; • The bank can either request a non-judicial foreclosure or judicial foreclosure. If you are currently failing to make monthly payments for your mortgage. It is crucial to seek help earlier in the process to ensure that you have a path forward. Here are some practical tips to consider when trying to avoid a foreclosure: • Be timely with your loan payments and do not ignore the problem; • There may be other financial options available for you therefore, it is recommended to contact your lender earlier on; • Make sure you are receiving the notices from your lender and responding accordingly because failing to do so will not serve as an excuse in the foreclosure court; • Read and understand your rights through your loan documents to make sure you know what the lender can and cannot do if you miss a payment; • There are alternative foreclosure prevention methods and it is important to know them; • You have the option of asking additional help from the U.S Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD) they have counselors that are available to assist in better managing your finances; • Mortgage payment should be priority along with healthcare therefore organizing a budget that ensures this is crucial to being on time with the monthly payments for your home; • Utilizing your assets to reinstate your loans can also be another option to avoid foreclosure on your home; • Avoid foreclosure prevention companies and do not pay fees for that type of help and; • Be aware of foreclosure fraud and scams that can require a signature on one document for your foreclosure to go away. If you think you are in a difficult financial situation and may not be able to make your monthly mortgage payments seek help immediately. It is important to contact your lender earlier in the process and plan for other options to modify your payments than deal with a foreclosure. The foreclosure process is overwhelming and complicated; therefore contacting your local foreclosure lawyer may be helpful. Foreclosure Fraud Foreclosure fraud is a term encompassing any type of scheme involving misrepresentations, false statements, or false promises related to foreclosure. The fraud scams must be designed to enrich the person or company making the fraudulent statements or false promises and/or must be designed to deprive the scam victim of the rightful value of his property. Foreclosure fraud takes many forms including: • Foreclosure rescue scams: This type of scheme involves charging a fee for “foreclosure relief” and not providing any such relief. Homeowners who were in danger of losing their homes receive advertising material promising them that the home could be saved. After paying fees, the homeowners are often told that their houses are too far gone or that staving off foreclosure is not possible. Thousands of homeowners paid out exorbitant fees (sometimes several thousands of dollars) to get none of the foreclosure help that they were told they’d receive. • Foreclosure fee inflation: Service providers charge exorbitant fees to serve notices of foreclosure on homeowners. While a traditional fee for service of process should total a few hundred dollars, some service providers were paid thousands of dollars to give papers to homeowners. The costs of these fees were passed on to the homeowners, who become responsible for paying for the money the mortgage lender spent on the foreclosure process as part of a foreclosure judgment. • Fractional ownership transfers: This is a special type of foreclosure rescue fraud. The process involves a homeowner signing over a part interest of the home to a company that promises to stop the foreclosure. The company then hires “straw homeowners” and gives them the ownership interest. The straw owner files for bankruptcy and the foreclosure process is delayed. Homeowners were frequently misled into believing these scams could help them save their house, but instead the homeowner simply ended up paying a monthly fee as well as giving up partial ownership in the home as the foreclosure process was strung along. • Improperly taking ownership of foreclosed homes: Many homes that were in default or with pending foreclosures were vacated by their rightful owners. One foreclosure fraud scam involves using forged quit claim deeds to make it appear that a person or company owns several foreclosed homes. The homes were then rented out to unsuspecting tenants. Bank Foreclosure Fraud While some foreclosure fraud scams target financial institutions, many banks also engage in fraudulent behavior. Mortgage fraud by banks also takes many forms including: • Document forgery: Mortgages are frequently sold and resold by lending institutions. This could result in some lenders having ownership of a mortgage loan but not having the paperwork to show a right to collect. Banks could create documents after the fact to make it appear as if the paperwork was in order. An electronic database called MERS is supposed to track mortgage transfers, but there was little quality control. In fact, as part of a 2011 settlement with federal regulators, MERS promised to improve controls to avoid fraudulent assignments and database errors. • Robo-signing: Mortgage paperwork is supposed to be carefully checked before a foreclosure moves forward. Many lending institutions, however, had unqualified people rubber stamping foreclosures and signing off on thousands of actions per month without actually doing a thorough review of documents. • Mortgage modification fraud: To help people save their homes, the government created mortgage modification programs and incentivized lenders to participate. Some lenders have been accused of failing to honor loan modifications that were transferred from other mortgage servicers. Others demanded payments with promises of negotiating a modification and then never followed through on the modification. Still others delayed decisions on short sales or claimed never to have received paperwork so that foreclosure could move forward, even as homeowners were trying to participate in mortgage modification. Because of the foreclosure fraud by banks, a foreclosure fraud settlement was reached in which the five largest mortgage services were supposed to provide $5 billion in direct payments to defrauded homeowners and were supposed to take an additional $20 billion worth of action to provide relief to homeowners, such as reducing principal balances or interest rates. The government continues to pursue action against banks for foreclosure fraud. Banks could face criminal and civil actions. Lending institutions, as well as financial professionals who may have been part of fraud schemes, should consult an attorney. What Are the Types of Foreclosure? In the United States, individual states follow either a judicial or non-judicial foreclosure process, typically depending upon whether they are a mortgage state or deed of trust state. However, you may safely assume that all states allow some form of judicial foreclosure process. Judicial foreclosure • The lender seeks to foreclose by filing a civil lawsuit against the borrower and serving the borrower with a formal summons and foreclosure complaint. • The foreclosure process is handled through the local court system. The court appoints a referee to conduct the foreclosure auction on the courthouse steps. • The lender records a lis pendens with the county clerk where the property is located. This lis pendens becomes a lien on the property and gives notice of the pending foreclosure auction. • The court grants a judgment permitting the lender to conduct the foreclosure auction. • The Notice of Foreclosure Sale (NFS), which announces date, time and place of the auction, is published and sometimes posted (depending on the locale) for a certain period of time prior to auction. • Generally, the borrower can stop the foreclosure by repaying what he owes up to the moment of sale. • The process can take from four to eight months to complete if no one raises any legal objections to the foreclosure. Non-judicial foreclosure • This is followed in deed of trust states. A deed of trust conveys an interest in real property to a third party (the trustee) to hold as security for repayment of a debt. • The trustee has the authority to initiate foreclosure proceedings by virtue of a power of sale clause included in the mortgage or deed of trust. • The trustee records a Notice of Default (NOD) with the county clerk where the property is located. This document gives notice of an impending foreclosure and grants the borrower a period of time in which to object to the lender’s claim or pay what he owes. • The borrower may not stop the foreclosure after the expiration of this time period. • Following the expiration of a predetermined amount of time (which varies from state to state), the trustee records a Notice of Trustee’s Sale (NTS) with the county clerk. This notice establishes the date, time and place of the foreclosure auction. • It can take up to 12 months to complete a foreclosure, depending upon the state. It is important to remember that neither judicial nor non-judicial foreclosures are one-size-fits-all. Each state follows its own established foreclosure laws and procedures. Consult with a foreclosure specialist in your state to protect your rights during a foreclosure.

Layton Utah Foreclosure Lawyer

When you need legal help with Foreclosure In Layton Utah, please call Ascent Law for your free consultation (801) 676-5506. We want to help you!

Ascent Law LLC 8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite C West Jordan, Utah 84088 United States Telephone: (801) 676-5506

Ascent Law LLC

4.9 stars – based on 67 reviews

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Foreclosure Lawyer Layton Utah

Layton is a city in Davis County, Utah, United States. It is part of the Ogden-Clearfield Metropolitan Statistical Area. As of the 2010 census, the city had a population of 67,311, rising to an estimated 77,303 by 2018. Layton is the most populous city in Davis County and the ninth most populous in Utah. Layton has direct access to Salt Lake City, Ogden, Salt Lake City International Airport, Antelope Island, and the FrontRunner commuter rail. Layton City is a leader in economic development for the region, with immediate adjacency to Hill Air Force Base, a large hospitality district (1,000+ hotel beds) and conference center, the Layton Hills Mall, multiple nationally recognized retail and food chains, the East Gate Business Park, and the Weber State University-Davis campus. In 2014, Layton contributed $1.34 billion worth of retail sales activity, the second largest market north of Salt Lake City and seventh largest in Utah. Layton was settled in the 1850s as an outgrowth of Kaysville, and is named after Christopher Layton, a Latter-day Saint colonizer and leader. It was included in the boundaries when Kaysville was incorporated as a city in 1868, but by the 1880s many Layton residents wanted to separate from the city. They challenged Kaysville’s authority to tax their property, claiming they received no municipal services.

This dispute reached the United States Supreme Court in 1894 as the case of Linford v. Ellison, which was decided in favor of the Layton property owners. The separatist movement finally succeeded in 1902, when Layton became an independent unincorporated area. After further growth it was made an incorporated town in 1920. The town’s population increased slowly; up until 1940 it was about 600. The creation of Hill Air Force Base to the north in 1940, followed shortly by the United States’ entry into World War II, led to a dramatic population increase. War workers streamed into the area; the 1950 census counted 3,456 people. Layton became a city, transformed from a farming town to a residential community. Growth slowed after the war, but Layton continued to develop as a suburban bedroom community, as those not employed at the Air Force base began commuting to the Salt Lake City or Ogden areas. The city continued to expand geographically, annexing surrounding parcels of land, including the adjacent town of Layton and city of East Layton. In 1985, Layton passed Bountiful to become the most populous city in Davis County.

States have their own rules and regulations regarding the process of foreclosures. There are several steps that take place before the actual final step of when the lender seizes your property through the foreclosure. In 22 states judicial foreclosure is the primary way of dealing with home foreclosures. This means that the lender must go through the courts to show that the borrower is failing to make the monthly mortgage payments. If the courts approve the foreclosure, the local sheriff auctions the property to the highest bidder to recoup what the bank is owed or the bank becomes the owner to resell the property. Some other states use non-judicial foreclosure, which is also known as the power of the sale. This process is faster compared to court intervention.

Foreclosure process is complicated and can be overwhelming. It is important to know what your rights are and what the banks are not allowed to do. Some banks can cross boundaries in the foreclosure processes. Each state has their own set of regulations on dealing with the foreclosure process. Here is a list of things to consider of what banks cannot do before foreclosing on the home: • Some states require banks to determine if the homeowner qualifies for either a loan modification or some other form of help before foreclosing on the home. If the bank decides to do both at the same time, it is illegal also known as “dual tracking”; • If the homeowner applies for some help or loan modification, the bank cannot start the foreclosure process; • The bank must obtain a court order and file for an eviction before foreclosing the home; • The bank cannot padlock your home if you are still living in it and; • If you reinstate your mortgage before the sheriff sale, the bank cannot continue your foreclosure process. However, there are some things that the bank is allowed to do during the foreclosure process: • Banks can padlock the home if it is empty; • The bank can seek alternative judgments if they are unable to sell the home at auction for what they are owed on the mortgage and; • The bank can either request a non-judicial foreclosure or judicial foreclosure.

If you are currently failing to make monthly payments for your mortgage. It is crucial to seek help earlier in the process to ensure that you have a path forward. Here are some practical tips to consider when trying to avoid a foreclosure: • Be timely with your loan payments and do not ignore the problem; • There may be other financial options available for you therefore, it is recommended to contact your lender earlier on; • Make sure you are receiving the notices from your lender and responding accordingly because failing to do so will not serve as an excuse in the foreclosure court; • Read and understand your rights through your loan documents to make sure you know what the lender can and cannot do if you miss a payment; • There are alternative foreclosure prevention methods and it is important to know them; • You have the option of asking additional help from the U.S Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD) they have counselors that are available to assist in better managing your finances; • Mortgage payment should be priority along with healthcare therefore organizing a budget that ensures this is crucial to being on time with the monthly payments for your home; • Utilizing your assets to reinstate your loans can also be another option to avoid foreclosure on your home; • Avoid foreclosure prevention companies and do not pay fees for that type of help and; • Be aware of foreclosure fraud and scams that can require a signature on one document for your foreclosure to go away.

If you think you are in a difficult financial situation and may not be able to make your monthly mortgage payments seek help immediately. It is important to contact your lender earlier in the process and plan for other options to modify your payments than deal with a foreclosure. The foreclosure process is overwhelming and complicated; therefore contacting your local foreclosure lawyer may be helpful. Foreclosure Fraud Foreclosure fraud is a term encompassing any type of scheme involving misrepresentations, false statements, or false promises related to foreclosure. The fraud scams must be designed to enrich the person or company making the fraudulent statements or false promises and/or must be designed to deprive the scam victim of the rightful value of his property. Foreclosure fraud takes many forms including: • Foreclosure rescue scams: This type of scheme involves charging a fee for “foreclosure relief” and not providing any such relief. Homeowners who were in danger of losing their homes receive advertising material promising them that the home could be saved. After paying fees, the homeowners are often told that their houses are too far gone or that staving off foreclosure is not possible. Thousands of homeowners paid out exorbitant fees (sometimes several thousands of dollars) to get none of the foreclosure help that they were told they’d receive. • Foreclosure fee inflation: Service providers charge exorbitant fees to serve notices of foreclosure on homeowners. While a traditional fee for service of process should total a few hundred dollars, some service providers were paid thousands of dollars to give papers to homeowners. The costs of these fees were passed on to the homeowners, who become responsible for paying for the money the mortgage lender spent on the foreclosure process as part of a foreclosure judgment. • Fractional ownership transfers: This is a special type of foreclosure rescue fraud. The process involves a homeowner signing over a part interest of the home to a company that promises to stop the foreclosure. The company then hires “straw homeowners” and gives them the ownership interest. The straw owner files for bankruptcy and the foreclosure process is delayed. Homeowners were frequently misled into believing these scams could help them save their house, but instead the homeowner simply ended up paying a monthly fee as well as giving up partial ownership in the home as the foreclosure process was strung along. • Improperly taking ownership of foreclosed homes: Many homes that were in default or with pending foreclosures were vacated by their rightful owners. One foreclosure fraud scam involves using forged quit claim deeds to make it appear that a person or company owns several foreclosed homes. The homes were then rented out to unsuspecting tenants. Bank Foreclosure Fraud While some foreclosure fraud scams target financial institutions, many banks also engage in fraudulent behavior. Mortgage fraud by banks also takes many forms including: • Document forgery: Mortgages are frequently sold and resold by lending institutions. This could result in some lenders having ownership of a mortgage loan but not having the paperwork to show a right to collect. Banks could create documents after the fact to make it appear as if the paperwork was in order. An electronic database called MERS is supposed to track mortgage transfers, but there was little quality control. In fact, as part of a 2011 settlement with federal regulators, MERS promised to improve controls to avoid fraudulent assignments and database errors. • Robo-signing: Mortgage paperwork is supposed to be carefully checked before a foreclosure moves forward. Many lending institutions, however, had unqualified people rubber stamping foreclosures and signing off on thousands of actions per month without actually doing a thorough review of documents. • Mortgage modification fraud: To help people save their homes, the government created mortgage modification programs and incentivized lenders to participate. Some lenders have been accused of failing to honor loan modifications that were transferred from other mortgage servicers. Others demanded payments with promises of negotiating a modification and then never followed through on the modification. Still others delayed decisions on short sales or claimed never to have received paperwork so that foreclosure could move forward, even as homeowners were trying to participate in mortgage modification. Because of the foreclosure fraud by banks, a foreclosure fraud settlement was reached in which the five largest mortgage services were supposed to provide $5 billion in direct payments to defrauded homeowners and were supposed to take an additional $20 billion worth of action to provide relief to homeowners, such as reducing principal balances or interest rates. The government continues to pursue action against banks for foreclosure fraud. Banks could face criminal and civil actions. Lending institutions, as well as financial professionals who may have been part of fraud schemes, should consult an attorney. What Are the Types of Foreclosure? In the United States, individual states follow either a judicial or non-judicial foreclosure process, typically depending upon whether they are a mortgage state or deed of trust state. However, you may safely assume that all states allow some form of judicial foreclosure process. Judicial foreclosure • The lender seeks to foreclose by filing a civil lawsuit against the borrower and serving the borrower with a formal summons and foreclosure complaint. • The foreclosure process is handled through the local court system. The court appoints a referee to conduct the foreclosure auction on the courthouse steps. • The lender records a lis pendens with the county clerk where the property is located. This lis pendens becomes a lien on the property and gives notice of the pending foreclosure auction. • The court grants a judgment permitting the lender to conduct the foreclosure auction. • The Notice of Foreclosure Sale (NFS), which announces date, time and place of the auction, is published and sometimes posted (depending on the locale) for a certain period of time prior to auction. • Generally, the borrower can stop the foreclosure by repaying what he owes up to the moment of sale. • The process can take from four to eight months to complete if no one raises any legal objections to the foreclosure. Non-judicial foreclosure • This is followed in deed of trust states. A deed of trust conveys an interest in real property to a third party (the trustee) to hold as security for repayment of a debt. • The trustee has the authority to initiate foreclosure proceedings by virtue of a power of sale clause included in the mortgage or deed of trust. • The trustee records a Notice of Default (NOD) with the county clerk where the property is located. This document gives notice of an impending foreclosure and grants the borrower a period of time in which to object to the lender’s claim or pay what he owes. • The borrower may not stop the foreclosure after the expiration of this time period. • Following the expiration of a predetermined amount of time (which varies from state to state), the trustee records a Notice of Trustee’s Sale (NTS) with the county clerk. This notice establishes the date, time and place of the foreclosure auction. • It can take up to 12 months to complete a foreclosure, depending upon the state. It is important to remember that neither judicial nor non-judicial foreclosures are one-size-fits-all. Each state follows its own established foreclosure laws and procedures. Consult with a foreclosure specialist in your state to protect your rights during a foreclosure.

Layton Utah Foreclosure Lawyer

When you need legal help with Foreclosure In Layton Utah, please call Ascent Law for your free consultation (801) 676-5506. We want to help you!

Ascent Law LLC 8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite C West Jordan, Utah 84088 United States Telephone: (801) 676-5506

Ascent Law LLC

4.9 stars – based on 67 reviews

Recent Posts

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Limited Liability Company

Income From Trusts In Divorce

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Source: https://www.ascentlawfirm.com/foreclosure-lawyer-layton-utah/