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erraticfairy · 6 years ago

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When You Feel Guilty Being a Working Mom

“Why bother having children if you don’t spend time with them?”

Playwright and author Sarah Ruhl distinctly remembers her mother saying this about moms who worked full-time. After Ruhl had her own children, her mom’s words continued to haunt her, she writes in her excellent book 100 Essays I Don’t Have Time to Write: On Umbrellas and Sword Fights, Parades and Dogs, Fire Alarms, Children, and Theater.

For many working moms, these words haunt us, too. Maybe you work from home, and wonder if you should be able to get your work done in the margins of your day—before your child wakes up, during naptime, after bedtime. Maybe you barely make enough to cover your childcare (and wonder if it’s fair for your spouse to foot the bill since you’re the one who chooses to work). Maybe you’re just starting a start-up, and your salary is lower than low. Maybe you have a time-consuming career and a long commute, which means your child spends most of their weekdays in daycare. Maybe you’re working full-time and going to school.

Guilt is tough because it’s a signal that you’re doing something wrong. So when you feel guilty, you become convinced that you’re taking some terrible action.

But sometimes guilt is a false alarm. And it, unfortunately, tends to ring especially loudly for mothers.

“Mothers have a unique type of guilt that shows up in a variety of ways, and working mom guilt is a particularly difficult brand of maternal guilt,” said Stephanie Sprenger, a writer who pens the blog Mommy, for Real and co-edited The HerStories Project‘s essay collection: So Glad They Told Me: Women Get Real About Motherhood.

She encouraged moms to open up about their guilt, whether it’s talking to a therapist, mentioning it in a moms’ group, or writing about it inside your journal. “Talking about it may seem scary, but it actually makes our guilt less of a powerful force.”

Below, you’ll find additional tips on navigating your guilt—and making it less powerful and persuasive.

Identify the source of your guilt. Kate Rope, author of Strong as a Mother: How to Stay Healthy, Happy, and (Most Importantly) Sane from Pregnancy to Parenthood, stressed the importance of identifying why you’re feeling guilty: “Is it because you really think something should change and you are not doing what you believe is the best thing for you and your family? Or is it because you’ve internalized ideas from other people in your life or society in general and feel like you are not living up to those ideas?”

If the former is true for you, she suggested rethinking how you’re structuring your life so it better aligns with your wants and values (if that’s possible). Maybe that means asking your boss if you could work from home a few days a week to cut down on your commute, and spend that time with your child. Maybe that means changing jobs, so you have a less demanding position or a more flexible arrangement. Maybe it means going part time, and having your kids attend daycare three days a week. Maybe it means doing a split-shift, where you work until 2 p.m., spend time with your kids, and then work for several hours after their bedtime. Or maybe it means leaving the workforce all together. (Either way, there are so many ways to design your life with kids—as the comments illustrate in this post on Laura Vanderkam’s site.)

If the latter is true for you, that your guilt is coming from messages outside of yourself, tune into—and keep tuning into—your beliefs and what’s best for you and your family, Rope said. (More on that below.)

Don’t put guilt in the driver’s seat. One of Sprenger’s favorite books is Feel the Fear . . . And Do It Anyway! Her personal motto is: “Feel the guilt . . .and do it anyway!” That is, acknowledge how you’re feeling and explore it—but if your guilt isn’t pointing to some deeper truth, keep doing what you’re doing.

And don’t change a thing. As Sprenger said, keep working at a job that fulfills you, skip bedtime to take a yoga class, or pay a sitter so you can get a massage. “The guilt may or may not go away, but that doesn’t mean you have to let it take the wheel and guide your decisions.”

See the value in your work. When Rope interviewed Lauren Smith Brody, the author of The Fifth Trimester: The Working Mom’s Guide to Style, Sanity and Success after Baby, for her book, she shared this tip: Make a list of what you get from your job (a paycheck totally counts!), and what you bring to your job. “Both of these will help you see the value of your work for yourself and for a larger community—your organization,” Rope said.

See caregivers in a different light. Think of your kids’ caregivers as growing their community, introducing them to different perspectives and helping them develop skills that might not be in your wheelhouse, Rope said. For instance, Rope has had several sitters, including her mother-in-law, who are great artists and have helped her daughters nurture their interest and abilities in art.

“My mom always told me, ‘the more people who love your child, the better,’ and I really believe that. We were intended to raise human beings as a community, and children benefit and learn from a wider community.”

Consider the lessons. Your children can learn a lot from your work. For instance, according to Rope: They can learn from you providing for them, and they can learn from the kind of work you do. If your work feeds your soul, they can learn the importance of caring for yourself, and if your work serves others, they can learn the importance of caring for people beyond your loved ones, she said.

Realize that you’re not failing. Moms often feel like failures because we can’t keep up: We’re expected to be on top of work—and on top of the latest parenting information and advice, to “be all things at all times to our kids,” Rope said. However, there’s very little support for these massive expectations, including inadequate maternity leave and inflexible workplace policies, she said.

“There is no such thing as daddy guilt, which demonstrates the incredible burden we put on moms to be the primary, all-knowing caregiver.” And yet “it takes a village to raise a child.”

When Ruhl recently asked her mom to clarify what she meant by saying, “Why bother having children if you don’t spend time with them?” after taking a moment to think, her mom replied: “Probably I was just jealous of the mothers who worked full-time.”

Guilt is a tricky emotion. Sometimes, it really does reveal an underlying desire—which might mean making a big change. And other times it’s a false alarm (no matter how roaring its ring). The key is to dig deep and identify which one it is for you. And whatever you choose, know that there’s value and worth in all of it.

from World of Psychology https://ift.tt/2AtxVg7 via theshiningmind.com

#World of Psychology #child psychology

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i-am-very-very-tired · 7 years ago

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BY MELISSA HARRIS-PERRY @MHARRISPERRY September 15, 2016 Nobody drops a game-changer like the Carter family. Beyoncé unveiled an entire visual album at the stroke of midnight, got us into Formation on the eve of the Super Bowl and redefined lemonade for a generation. This morning it was Jay Z. Hova strolled onto the homepage of The New York Times with a four-minute narration of illustrated video exploring the racialized ravages of America’s drug war and was like, “I’ma just leave this here.” The fire collaboration is the latest from the Drug Policy Alliance, one of the most respected change agents in the multidecade struggle for sentencing reform and sane drug policy. Progressive journalist, writer, and studio artist Molly Crabapple is the swift arm bringing life to the pen and ink representations of three decades of poor drug policy, mandatory sentencing, and explosive incarceration rates. Jay’s distinctive voice traces the trajectory of American imprisonment from 1986 to 2016, moving deftly from President Ronald Reagan’s shredding of the social safety net to President Bill Clinton’s crime bill to the new economy of legal marijuana that now excludes African-Americans and Latinos. dream hampton’s production genius brings the piece together. Much respect to the alliance, dream, Molly, and Jay for this effort. It is a necessary intervention in this electoral season when the media seems determined to ignore any substantive discussion of policies impacting the lives of the most vulnerable Americans. It is important, but it is only half the story. If Jay has given us a “History” of the War on Drugs, allow me to offer a “Herstory” of the War on Drugs. Don’t get it twisted, this ain’t beef. I ain’t the real Roxanne. And this ain’t exactly Rap Genius either. My goal here isn’t to annotate the piece as it stands. Although a good syllabus could emerge from quality citations on this piece. Get on it, Professor Dyson! I offer these lines to expand our understanding of how black communities were distorted and destroyed by the politics, policies, and philosophies of America’s misguided drug war. We need a bigger frame to ensure sisters are in the picture. This is that intersectional expansion. Let’s begin at the beginning, where Jay begins. In 1986, when I was coming of age, Ronald Reagan doubled down on the war on drugs that was started by Richard Nixon in 1971. Drugs were bad. Fried your brain. Drug dealers were monsters. The sole reason neighborhoods and major cities were failing. No one wanted to talk about Reaganomics and the ending of social safety nets, the defunding of schools, and the loss of jobs across America. — Jay Z President Richard Nixon’s drug war is the older sibling of hip-hop, born just two years before that Sedgwick Avenue house party that would ultimately birth its own most prescient cultural critic. Like hip-hop, public policy needs rhetorical strategy. Even as black Americans were pressing for full citizenship in the civil rights revolution, lawmakers were stepping into the cipher to test “cultural deviance” as a battle strategy for public opinion. Citing pathology, they could shift public attention away from structural inequities burdening poor black communities. Jay recalls being labeled a monster in his own neighborhood when he was just a young man. He wasn’t alone; leaders from both political parties discovered that a sure route to public notoriety was to climb the ladder of black women’s bent and broken backs. Take Democratic Sen. Daniel Patrick Moynihan’s The Negro Family: The Case for National Action, written when it was legal to deny housing on the basis of race, legal to pay workers different wages on the basis of race, and routine to deny school admission to black students. Despite the overwhelming barriers facing black folk, Moynihan concluded, black women were the main problem in our own communities. “A fundamental fact of Negro American family life is the often reversed roles of husband and wife,” and he added, “There is probably no single fact of Negro American life so little understood by whites.” Come on, everyone knows black women’s hair is the single fact of black American life least understood by whites. Can you feel posthumous side-eye sir? Moynihan’s conclusions granted permission to generations of policymakers to imagine poor black women as domineering household managers whose unfeminine insistence on control both emasculated their potential male partners and destroyed their children’s futures. Instead of engaging black women as creative citizens doing the best they could in tough circumstances, the report labeled them as unrelenting cheats unfairly demanding assistance from the system. This made it easier for Reagan to turn black women into Cadillac-driving welfare queens in the 1980s. It was simple for the American public to believe sensational headlines and popular movies in the 1990s blaming black mothers as the cause of social and economic decline through the epidemic of “crack babies.” Listen. Halle Berry got caught out there with this madness. Nah, we didn’t forget Losing Isaiah. We are going to let it slide because we know you had to work, but we did not forget. The reality is these so-called crack babies were a myth. What seemed to be the living, squealing, suffering, embodied evidence of pathological black womanhood turns out to be a media creation. Twenty-five years later, there is no evidence that use of crack actually causes abnormal babies, even though the media insisted this link was true. The crack baby was and is a racial myth – a myth with very real consequences. Hustle became the sole villain and drug addicts lacked moral fortitude. In the 1990s, incarceration rates in the U.S. blew up. Today we incarcerate more people than any other country in the world. — Jay Z Crack babies are a myth, but alcohol and tobacco have well-documented and extremely negative effects during pregnancy. Alcohol and tobacco have something else in common — good lobbyists representing in Washington and in state capitals across the country. Maybe that is why you can’t be arrested for arriving to give birth drunk, but in many states you can be arrested if you have illicit drugs in your system when you give birth. Arrested. Not offered drug counseling or prenatal care. Arrested. Many of those states have, in turn, seen a substantial decline in poor women seeking prenatal care. Perhaps since, no surprise, 70 percent of women charged with fetal abuse are women of color. I wonder why they are the ones being tested. While we are dragging pregnant black women off to jail, no one is held accountable for the one factor that has been shown consistently to have lasting effects on the health and life outcomes of mothers and children — poverty. Nearly a quarter of American children live in poverty, black infants are far more likely to be born into poverty, more likely to die in their first year, and more likely to suffer the health effects of poverty for a lifetime. A 2015 report by Save the Children also ranked the United States last among developed nations for maternal health outcomes, largely because of the racial disparities for black women. And maybe I missed it, but has anyone been charged for poisoning the children of Flint, Michigan, with lead yet? But as Jay says. No one wants to talk about that. The war on drugs exploded the U.S. prison population, disproportionately locking away blacks and Latinos. — Jay Z Once the public has been convinced that culture and choices, not structures or policies, are to blame for bad outcomes, solutions coalesce around individual punishments rather than systemic change. Let’s lock up the bad guys instead of changing the bad laws. The prison population exploded and the effects of that explosion were not gender-neutral. The war on drugs was especially pernicious for black women. Even though the total number of men behind bars is larger than the total number of women, the rate of growth for women has been faster. According to data from the Sentencing Project, between 1980 and 2014, the number of incarcerated women increased by more than 700 percent. These are disproportionately black women. The Department of Justice reports the rate of incarceration is almost twice as high for black versus white women, 113 per 100,000 compared with 51 per 100,000. Given that nearly 60 percent of these women are mothers who were caring for minor children before their sentencing, the jailing of black women has a devastating effect on black children and communities. Research suggests maternal incarceration can have a particularly acute effect on children’s mental and emotional well-being. Judges’ hands were tied by tough-on-crime laws and they were forced to hand out mandatory life sentences for simple possession and low-level drug sales. My home state of New York started this with Rockefeller laws. — Jay Z Most women in federal prison are serving time for nonviolent drug offenses, often conspiracy charges. The public hears drug conspiracy and thinks of large-scale organizations operating across borders. Think instead of a woman living with an infant and her boyfriend. Given that the overwhelming majority of incarcerated women are survivors of domestic abuse, sexual violence, and childhood trauma, it is likely this woman is in a situation where she or her children may experience abuse. If her boyfriend sells drugs from the apartment and she is arrested and asked if she knows anything, she has two choices. She can confirm her knowledge of the drug sales or deny it. If she confirms, she can be evicted. She may suffer violence. If she refuses to cooperate, she faces harsh mandatory minimum sentencing. Jay tells us to remember his home state of New York’s Rockefeller laws. I ask you to remember the story from my home state of Virginia, Kemba Smith. Kemba is poster child for how these drug laws swept up black women who were guilty of little more than being victims. She was seven months’ pregnant, had no criminal record, was charged with a nonviolent offense, and was in an abusive relationship with a man who ran a major drug ring. Still, Kemba was sentenced to 24 years in prison as a result of mandatory minimum drug laws. It is Kemba’s graduation photo on the cover of Emerge magazine that haunts the nightmare of those college-bound girls whose suburban childhoods didn’t look like Jay’s Brooklyn upbringing. Her story said this was a war with weapons powerful enough to lay to ruin the Different World dreams of black girls. Long after the crack era ended, we continued the war on drugs. — Jay Z In 1999, Sharanda Jones was 23 and had an 8-year-old daughter when she was arrested and convicted on one count of conspiracy to distribute crack cocaine. Conspiracy. She was given a life sentence. Life without the possibility of parole. At 23. For a single count of a nonviolent offence. In May 2014, having already spent 15 years in a maximum security prison, she wrote a heart-wrenching letter, trying to help the world see the madness of this injustice. “There is no reduction, no good behavior, that will ever reduce my sentence and allow me to return to society. I know that, unless President Obama (or one of his successors) commutes my sentence, I will die in prison. A life sentence in the federal system is just a very slow death.” Clinton granted clemency to Kemba Smith in 2000. President Barack Obama granted clemency to Sharanda Jones in 2016. They are finally free, but these are just two stories out of the hundreds of thousands of women still suffering in a system where our national response to black women who are guilty of being victims of poverty, of structural inequality, of abuse, and of trauma, to lock them away; strip them of parental rights; permanently damage their ability to seek education, secure housing, start businesses, and choose their elected representatives. And it begins when they are girls. Black girls are suspended, criminalized, pushed out of school and into a juvenile system where they receive disproportionately harsh sentences, often in the wake of severe emotional and sexual trauma. The war on drugs is an Epic Fail. — Jay Z Jay and his collaborators have drawn our attention back to this critical issue. We must look and listen and grapple with the cost of this war — not just the $51 billion the United States wastes annually. (Dollars that could be spent infrastructure, education, or really anything else.) This abbreviated history asks us to calculate the cost of lost genius, broken families, hollow communities, and stolen futures caused by decades of ill-advised policing and draconian sentencing. We should do the math this video is asking of us. Then multiply it.

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blacklivesmattermemphis · 8 years ago

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On January 14, 2017, American political activist, academic scholar, and an author, Angela Davis was the keynote speaker at the First Congregational Church. Participants motivated by music and by a Black Lives Matter energized youth rap song enjoyed a delicious dinner catered by world renowned Chef Gary of DeJavu Restaurant. The Mid-South Peace and Justice Center event was sold out for its 35th anniversary.

Black Power

Lil Noah Listening

Jayanni Webster

Angela & Tami Sawyer

Megan Yboz

Ms. Tami Sawyer introduced Davis who graced the stage with poise and confidence. The words of wisdom enlightened everyone in the standing room only room church. She discussed the continual struggle of fighting for social justice. Listening to Davis, one might have thought they were in a college classroom experiencing education on the importance of knowing the real history of the demise of Dr. King’s and his birthday becoming a holiday for retailers to capitalize rather than a remembrance of his legacy. She concluded with the unsettling reality of our need to resist the Trump Administration.

Many women and organizations attended this event. Davis’ appearance motivated the many women and set the tone for the rest of the week in Memphis, TN. Invigorated with the words of encouragement from Davis’ dinner, several Black Lives Matter Memphis leaders and members joined CORR {Commission on Religion and Racism} and participated in the annual Dr. King March on Monday, January, 18.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Dr. Issac Richmond hosted a brief dialogue in which several organizations unified and strategize with unions and citizens on the Auction Block where slaves were once sold. BLM’s national day of action occurred throughout the country and was headed by the new Movement For Black Lives to “Reclaim MLK Day.” The parade was one one of the largest in years and concluded in front of the National Civil Rights Museum with BLMM members doing a die-in. This silent protest was to bring awareness to the systematic oppression that we as a group continue to face in a city with our youth dying daily and the need to fight white supremacy which cripples us as a society. The “Reclaim MLK” die-in concluded with Homecare/Fight For 115 organizer Jayanni Webster, leading the Assata Shakur chant. ��We Have Nothing to Lose but Our Chains” the women roared, and the crowd applauded.

Friday, January 22, 2017, Donald Trump was sworn in as the new president of the USA. During the inauguration, BLM urged viewers not to watch the inauguration or even put their televisions on the channel, all while students at Lemoyne-Owen College, Rhodes College, Christian Brothers University, and the University of Memphis dissented to his legitimacy of the presidency by walking out of their classes. This student rise up was a silent protest to reiterate the disapproval of Trump and his the views in which he vehemently promotes, misogyny, Islamophobia, racism, and hatred. The “Student Rise Ups” ended in expression rallies standing in solidarity to resist Trump for the next 4 years.

Saturday, January 23, 2017, one day after the United States of America saw its 45th president be sworn into office, women from all over the world stood in solidarity to make their voices heard amplifying solidarity with all disenfranchised groups in which Trump intends to target. In Memphis, several organizations {Together We Can, Moms Demand Action, Campaign Non-Violence, aligned with Black Lives Matter Memphis, came together for the Women’s March. Only 2500 participants were expected, but over 9000 attended. The march began at the Judge D’Army Bailey courthouse. Whiled gathered the wife of the late Judge Bailey offered inspiring words to the inspired crowd. Her son stood beside her with his black power fist high in the air in front of the crowd of women and men who stood in solidarity with women’s rights.

The women’s march organized by dedicated women who acted as marshalls and peacekeepers made signs and medical, illustrated how effective women can me when they work together. Black Lives Matter Memphis participated in this event because black women are the most disrespected group of people in America. It is necessary that all women mobilize to overcome this fact. While walking down Mainstreet chants could be heard, “What do we do when women’s rights are under attack? Stand up and Fight Back!” Children and babies could also be seen in strollers holding signs smiling and cooing in total amazement that they were amongst history in Memphis. During this march, the energy of love, compassion, peace, and dedication flowed through the mean streets of Memphis. Women wearing pink ear hats stood up for each other regardless of race, gender, religion or socioeconomic background. Unity would be the best word to describe herstory on this day amongst all the signs that shared a specific viewpoint ultimately to RESIST Trump. The girl power could not be denied, and we were all in formation.

On Tuesday, January 24, 2017, Moveon.org and Black Lives Matter Memphis hosted a rally at the Clifford Davis Federal Courthouse. Greeted by helicopters, 2 mobile sky cops, and police on motorcycles the intimidation tactics were in full effect. The 50 plus group of professionals and registered voters who wanted to voice their concerns about Trump’s Swamp Cabinet were stopped by Homeland Security and told that only 4 people could enter the federal building at a time and they had to be escorted to and from Senator Lamar Alexander’s Office.

Alexander’s staff, Mr. Connoly, was informed before the rally began that we wanted to voice our concerns. He told BLM organizer P. Moses that they would be going to lunch at 11:45 am and return at 1:15 pm. Unlike Senator Bob Corker he did not welcome his constituents in his public office. The lack of transparency prompted heavy skepticism as to the fitness of Senator Alexander, and a few members pledged to come back every week. Others offered to start vetting new candidates to run against him in the next election. Alexander has held public office almost 40 years and rarely makes a public appearance in which his constituents have access. The group began chanting at the Homeland Security officer, “This is what Democracy Looks Like, Come Out Lamar” who then instructed the citizens not to block the sidewalk.

The group concurred Alexander has lost touch with the people and the Republican guru needs to go. Several members waited “four-at-a-time” outside the 70-degree heat and were eventually greeted by a kind black secretary who wrote all their concerns down but obviously was not in control. She had been delegated the duty of dealing with the constituents, whom the aide had apparently assumed were all black but were not. In spite of the phone ringing off the hook, she handled the situation the best she could. The women of Memphis TN with encouragement and a pledge of unity set the city on fire this week and promised that this is just the beginning and that this is not a moment but a movement. We Are Women! HEAR US ROAR

We Are Women Hear Us Roar! {Recap} On January 14, 2017, American political activist, academic scholar, and an author, Angela Davis was the keynote speaker at the First Congregational Church.

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aion-rsa · 8 years ago

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2016 Fred Van Lente Day Chat Transcript

Brian Cronin: Welcome, everyone, to the Fred Van Lente Day chat!

Brian Cronin: Some quick Fred Van Lente Day links for everyone to take a look at when they get here.

Brian Cronin: An exclusive preview of “Comic Book History of Comics” #3!

Brian Cronin: And a cool look at some weird connections in comic book history, using a lot of awesome Ryan Dunlavey art to illustrate a bunch of them!

Fred Van Lente: I like how you added not one, not two, but THREE random Jack Kirby + Celebrities encounters to this list

Brian Cronin: When we started talking connections, I couldn’t help it. It’s amazing that he really does have these connections to these super famous people. And that doesn’t even count his CIA connections when his art was used for the fake movie that they were filming that was made into the film “Argo”!

Fred Van Lente: I will never get tired of looking at his expression here:

“If I get closer, will he bite me”

Brian Cronin: You would have thought that Zappa would have prepared Kirby for Alan Moore. It should have taught him that long hairs could be his friend.

Fred Van Lente: This is before Moore became a wizard and expending all that mana really drained him (I don’t know why I bust on Alan Moore so much, when I was 16 I basically wanted to be him). _________________________________________________________________________________________

Brian Cronin: Was “HerStory” something that you and Ryan considered having in the original “Comic Book History of Comics”?

Fred Van Lente: It was. “Comic Book History of Comics” is unusual for us in a lot of ways structurally because both “Action Philosophers” (and soon “Action Presidents”) are biography based. But “CBHoC” is structured more around particular ideas or genres or movements. So I could never figure out how to get “Women in Comics” in there as a story without it smacking of raw tokenism. Then when the book came out and the biggest criticism was “Where are the women?” I was like, well, that was a missed opportunity.

Brian Cronin: And there, you’re obviously hurt by the very nature of patriarchal history.

Fred Van Lente: Yeah, exactly.

Brian Cronin: When IDW said they wanted to bring back the book I realized this was my chance to right that wrong.

Wayne Hotu: I watched “Carol” for the first time the other week… I thought it was great. I think I heard about Patricia Highsmith doing comics, but not which ones

Fred Van Lente: Yeah, I need to see “Carol.” I am on a big Patricia Highsmith kick right now as a result of doing that story. Tore through “Talented Mr. Ripley,” and halfway through “Strangers on a Train” which I don’t like nearly as much. But then I think I’ll do “Price of Salt” (which was made into “Carol”).

Brian Cronin: I’m fascinated by how she was able to be so ruthless with her own history. Just excising the part of her past she didn’t want to discuss anymore. “If I said it didn’t happen, it didn’t happen.”

Fred Van Lente: Yeah. Highsmith, by all accounts (particularly her girlfriends’), was a real character. It’s not hard to see how she could really get into the mindset of a sociopath like Ripley. The info in the Patricia Highsmith piece comes mostly from “The Talented Miss Highsmith,” a good if rather … elliptically written biography. The author actually talked to Timely editor Vince Fago, and that’s how we know about this disastrous date with Stan Lee. _________________________________________________________________________________________

Wayne Hotu: The “Comic Book History of Comics” “HerStory” format kind of reminds me of those old Big Books that… Vertigo? Paradox Press? used to come out with… where they devote a page to a topic/person.

Fred Van Lente: The Paradox Press Big Books were a big influence! I have almost all of them on my shelf. Geez, maybe I should try and complete a collection of that. I’ve already lost interest in bobbleheads.

Wayne Hotu: Which other famous women will you cover?

Fred Van Lente: Highsmith is #3, we do Nell Brinkley in #1, Tarpe Mills in #2. Jackie Ormes is in #4. _________________________________________________________________________________________

Dennis Calero: Give us your top reasons that you love Dennis Calero.

Fred Van Lente: Why I love Dennis Calero: 1. He joins my live chat. 2. His “Six-pack” 3. I can’t remember

Dennis Calero: Airplane vodka bottles come in 6 packs

Fred Van Lente: “My abs look like airplane vodka bottles” was my opening line to girls in college. ___________________________________________________________________________________________

Brian Cronin: When “Generation Zero” was being previewed, one of the hooks for it was “Archie Meets Authority”. If you had to write an “Archie” Comic, which one would you go for? You better say “Jughead.”

Fred Van Lente: “The Shield”. “Vic Mackey Infiltrates Riverdale”

Fred Van Lente: Sure, Jughead, I guess?

Brian Cronin: Good, I got the answer I wanted. Let’s close this chat down now!

Fred Van Lente: My grandfather had this cabin by the lake in Holland, MI and he had all these comics in a box up in the attic where we had to sleep. There were a lot of 1970s DC stuff, some real gems like “Brave and the Bold.” But then my dastardly older cousins stole them all for their personal collection. All that were left were the “Archies.” I learned a lot about Archie during that long, sad, hot summer. But in my mind he makes me think…of failure. [END SCENE] [APPLAUSE]

Brian Cronin: Hey, 1970s “Archie” comics had some great work in them. Frank Doyle, Dan DeCarlo, Samm Schwartz, George Gladir, some great creators on the books back then.

Fred Van Lente: Actually, no, “Betty and Veronica” are pretty cool. I like the idea of doing a whole comic about two high school girls trying to backstab each other. My first meeting with the editor it would be like: “Look, they brought back Bucky back, why can’t Betty FINALLY kill Veronica? I mean you know she wants it. Or maybe Veronica can kill Betty? I know: PHONE POLL! LET THE READERS DECIDE!!”

Dennis Calero: What about a “Whatever Happened to Baby Jane” type scenario?

Wayne Hotu: I’ve always been Team Veronica… why are so many other people wrong?

Fred Van Lente: I think I always liked Betty just because Veronica’s wealth is slightly intimidating.

Dennis Calero: I prefer Veronica because Betty’s poverty is crap.

Fred Van Lente: “Mr. Dennis Lodge”

Brian Cronin: The best character is clearly…Glenn Scarpelli, from “One Day at a Time”!

Brian Cronin: His father, Henry Scarpelli, was a long time “Archie” artist, so Glenn would appear in the comics when he became kind of sort of famous in the early 1980s.

Fred Van Lente: I hope Reggie and Archie kick that guy’s ass. __________________________________________________________________________________________

BikeTodd: Fred, you’ve worked for a lot of different companies just in the past year, is there a favorite among them?

Fred Van Lente: My lawyers tell me that it is bad business practice to name a favorite client on a chat forum that will later be posted on a public blog like “Comics Should Be Good.” But! Everybody’s got their strengths and weaknesses. I’ve worked for Boom, IDW, Dark Horse, Marvel, Valiant, Dynamite, and I’m working for most of those now and plan to keep doing so in the future. So they can’t be that bad, right? __________________________________________________________________________________________

Taimur Dar: I don’t suppose we’ll be seeing another Sebastian Greene mystery in the near future?

Fred Van Lente: No plans at present. I really liked how “Weird Detective” came together as a stand-alone trade paperback. Someone told me today the trade will be out in Feb 2017, so I am psyched for that. __________________________________________________________________________________________

Brian Cronin: Any plans for “Generation Zero” to cross over with any other Valiant titles?

Fred Van Lente: Generation Zero will remain in the wild, weird town of Rook, Michigan for the foreseeable future. I imagine they’ll be involved in “Harbinger Wars 2” (since they debuted in the original “Harbinger Wars”) but that’s not until 2018. __________________________________________________________________________________________

ZKrishef: Greetings, sir! I just wanted to say that I’m going to be reviewing Slapstick for a website called Critical Writ. I’m incredibly excited to review it. Everything about it looks marvelous. Have a wonderful day!

Fred Van Lente: Thanks! Reilly, Diego and I have such a great time doing that, I feel almost guilty.

Brian Cronin: Tell us something about this…Slapstick, that you speak of.

Fred Van Lente: Slapstick was named “Wizard Magazine”‘s Best New Character of…I want to say 1992? Slapstick is a living toon superhero, a kid from our world — well, the Marvel Universe — who gets transformed into Roger Rabbit, basically.

Dennis Calero: Isn’t there another Marvel cartooneqsue character? Tell me my mind, Fred Van Lente!

Mark Weisenberger Calise: I loved Slapstick.

Fred Van Lente: In our comic, he is a headcase who thinks he is a gritty, realistic superhero in the vein of the Punisher and tries to get work as a hero for hire but he ends up killing everyone because his cartoon physics actually horrible murder flesh and blood people.

Taimur Dar: I’m amazed Marvel let you do something involving Slapstick and his missing “dingus.”

Fred Van Lente: Like, I had never heard of Slapstick when Marvel asked me to do the book all I knew about him was literally: 1) He was like Who Framed Roger Rabbit was a hero 2) And he has no dick So we kinda had to expand from there you know? In our comic crazed toons from Dimension Ecch invade Earth and only Slapstick can stop them because they’re only attacking New Jersey and no one else gives a shit. And…uhmmm…Ms Marvel is…uh…in space…yeah, she’s in space.

BikeTodd: Well, it is Jersey.

Dennis Calero: Is this something to do with Crossroads of Dimensions like in that Man-Thing thing with Howard the Duck and the hot chick!

Fred Van Lente: The Nexus of All Realities doesn’t play a role here but A.R.M.O.R., the inter dimensional defense agency I created for “Marvel Zombies 3,” does (they were first seen defending the Nexus in “Marvel Zombies 3”)

Fred Van Lente: In the first four issues of “Slapstick” alone we have Bro-Man Master of the Multiverse, the Taurs (My Little Pony/Smurf centaurs) and WAR D.O.G.S., America’s Best Friend.

Brian Cronin: Like Dennis mentioned, will we see Madcap meet Slapstick at all? That would be an epic battle, much like Jesus vs. Socrates.

Dennis Calero: Madcap! Thanks, Brian, I thought I was going crazy!

Fred Van Lente They made Madcap into Deadpool’s arch-nemesis (which I think is a pretty good choice). So I think, if anything, he’s a tad over-saturated at just this moment, believe it or not.

Albert Ching: Madcap being overexposed is probably the most surprising thing to happen in 2016.

Dennis Calero: Yes. Madcap is definitely the most SURPRISING thing this year (COUGH COUGH)

Fred Van Lente: So yeah, buy “Slapstick,” it’s amazing, and there’s no movie attached to it so it’s not exactly going to burn up the sales charts. __________________________________________________________________________________________

p_keely: You have had a varied career in genres. Is there a genre you want to try?

Fred Van Lente: I’ve been doing a lot of mysteries a lot lately. My first prose novel, “Ten Dead Comedians,” will be out in July (random plug). So I’m hoping to do more of those. I love historical fiction. I had a great time with Dennis doing our Shanghai story in “Assassins Creed: Templars.” That’s a fun period of history. __________________________________________________________________________________________

Mark Belktron: Who would win in a fight, Jesus of Nazareth or Socrates?

Fred Van Lente: Mark, Jesus came back from the dead and Socrates didn’t, so I think you have your winner right there.

Dennis Calero: Even Jesus from 169th street would kick Socrates’ ass.

Mark Belktron: That is such a good answer. Thank you, Fred. __________________________________________________________________________________________

BikeTodd: Is there planned number of issues for “Generation Zero”? There has been some grumbling from the Valiant faithful over the apparent sudden end to series.

Fred Van Lente: In this instance, the fans’ fears are well-founded, looks like “Generation Zero” will only last two storyarcs. But there are two good storyarcs and I’ll be able to wrap the storyline the way I want. __________________________________________________________________________________________

RyanDunlavey: Happy Fred Van Lente Day, everybody! I am just here to let you know that Fred’s latest “Action Presidents” script did NOT make me tear up in the dentist chair yesterday. ALL LIES!

Fred Van Lente: Kind words from super-cartoonist Ryan Dunlavey!

Dennis Calero: Hey, it’s the fall me!

RyanDunlavey: Gotta go help my kid with his homework. Give him hell, Dennis!

Dennis Calero: On it!

Fred Van Lente: Yeah, that was the Theodore Roosevelt one, looking to see Ryan tear that one up.

Dennis Calero: Is there one on James Buchanan?

Fred Van Lente: Buchanan appears in “Abraham Lincoln,” does that count?

Dennis Calero: Sure, why not? __________________________________________________________________________________________

Dennis Calero: How did you feel about the musical portrayal of Hamilton? From the John Adams biography, he seems like a dick. What’s your verdict? Hero or dick?

Fred Van Lente: Oh, dick. Definitely dick. But he’s way less of a dick than Jefferson. Hamilton was OUR dick. “The People’s Dick.”

Brian Cronin: Okay, rank Adams, Jefferson, Monroe, Madison and Hamilton in dickery.

Fred Van Lente: Well, I’m not going to lie I don’t know too much about Monroe and Madison. Monroe was kind of Jefferson’s toady. Madison basically wrote the Constitution and eventually outgrew Jefferson’s shadow. Hamilton was a horndog and pretty arrogant, to the point where not apologizing to Burr when he really was kind of a dick to Burr literally got him killed. Jefferson was a racist who wrote “All men are created equal”, go figure that one out. Adams was not really someone you would want to hang out with because he was pretty headstrong and full of himself, but on the other hand he didn’t own any human beings and actively try to keep them in slavery. And despite Jefferson having written the Declaration, the intellectual foundation of the Revolution really came from Adams.

So Adams: Least Dickish, Jefferson: Most Dickish, Hamilton and Madison: Tied for second-least Dickish and Monroe= Just meh. I expect this to be a listicle on CBR tomorrow, Brian.

Wayne Hotu: Which one did William Daniels play in that movie?

Brian Cronin: Adams

Mark Weisenberger Calise: William Daniels played Adams in the original Broadway cast of “1776” too, I believe

Brian Cronin: Yep.

Fred Van Lente: I saw Brent Spiner play Adams in “1776.” He was rad

Dennis Calero: Brent Spiner should have chosen one night to play Data playing Adams.

Brian Cronin: That would have been too much awesomeness for the audience to handle

Fred Van Lente: “SIT DOWN, JOHN, SIT DOWN” “All right” (Data sits)

Fred Van Lente: I really like “Hamilton,” but it’s no “1776,” partly because it’s a straight-up biopic and not about this very specific drama of trying to get the Declaration out. So it’s a lot more … flabbier is the wrong word, but because a guy’s life story can’t be as dramatically structured.

Brian Cronin: Absolutely agreed. “Hamilton” is a great musical. I just like “1776” even better.

Fred Van Lente: Seconded. __________________________________________________________________________________________

Brian Cronin: How do you and Reilly write Slapstick? Co-plot and then you script?

Fred Van Lente: Reilly and I go to a bar and drink for like a sold two hours. I write out what we talked about semi-legibly on a single piece of paper. I tear off this piece of paper and give it to him and he types it for our editors because I was, like, “If you want to be co-writer you’ve got to like actually type some shit.”

Brian Cronin: Seems fair

Fred Van Lente: Marvel approves/disapproves/comments. Reilly draws out rough layouts — they’re called “storyboards” in the credits but they’re really more like regular comics thumbnails. And then Diego pencils and inks over them. Once all the pencils are done, I do lettering script that Reilly approves/comments on before I give to Marvel. So it’s kind of like regular Marvel Style just with a breakdown/co-writer component (Reilly)

Brian Cronin: It sounds a bit like how Giffen and DeMatteis did “Justice League International.” Although I think Giffen plotted solo.

Fred Van Lente: Yeah, Giffen/DeMatteis on “JLI” was my inspiration.

Brian Cronin: Well, it certainly worked out for a hilarious comic when Giffen and DeMatteis did it.

Fred Van Lente: I am super happy with it. I hope people check it out. __________________________________________________________________________________________

Taimur Dar: I know before “Slapstick,” Reilly did an “Incredible Hercules” story. Was that first time you worked together or was there something else before that?

Fred Van Lente: You know, I think that was the first time, the Thorcules arc of “iHerc.” He lives nearby and we became fast pals after that __________________________________________________________________________________________

Fred Van Lente: Wow, that hour flew by … last licks anybody?

Brian Cronin: Plug “Action Presidents”!

Fred Van Lente: I will plug “Action Presidents” on the THIRTEENTH Fred Van Lente Day chat because it will not be out until Presidents Day 2018. But it will be glorious and awesome. All four hardback books of it.

Dennis Calero: Plug the “Templar” trade!!!

Fred Van Lente: “Assassins Creed Templars: Black Cross” is 5 issues of Jazz Age Shanghai mayhem by Mr. Dennis Calero and myself currently available from Titan. It’s great historical adventure/mystery in the AC world, check it out.

Brian Cronin: Plug other stuff!

Fred Van Lente: “Generation Zero” is currently on-going from Valiant (at least for the next five months).

Fred Van Lente: Coming soon: “Z-Nation: Black Summer,” written by the show’s co-creator Craig Engler and me from Dynamite not too far into 2017. A NEW Marvel project that they wouldn’t let me announce today because they didn’t want it to get lost in the X-Rollout (which made sense to me) “Ten Dead Comedian” A Murder Mystery from Quirk Books next July. “Weird Detective” trade paperback from Dark Horse in 2017. That’s it … I think!

Brian Cronin: Plug something for Crystal!

Fred Van Lente: Come see my wife Crystal Skillman’s new play “Open” in February in NYC!

Fred Van Lente: Dennis is writing/drawing “Assassins Creed Templars” right now. Go get it!

Dennis Calero: Thanks, Fred!

Brian Cronin: Thanks, Fred for another awesome Fred Van Lente Day chat!

Fred Van Lente: Thanks, Brian. And most importantly….thanks, Glenn Scarpelli. Wherever you are.

The post 2016 Fred Van Lente Day Chat Transcript appeared first on CBR.com.

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