#and still delight in the whole ra's calling tim detective and tim being >:((((((((( about that

[vagrantblvrd]

That one AU where Jason’s not a Batkid, but Tim is and for *hand wavy reasons* they end up at the same high school/school of some kind, right?

And Jason’s just watching Tim and in all his Batkid glory attempting to keep his night job secret and being something of a human disaster in the process?

(Tim falling asleep in class, Tim coming to class with bruises and whatnot he tries to cover up. Tim missing class because of injuries/reasons. Tim giving the absolute worst excuses for all of the above and so on, and Jason being Worried(TM) because he likes the little shit, and also Tim is tiny, okay. Protective instincts activate.)

Meanwhile they get a new principal or fencing coach or something partway through the year and it’s mcfreaking Ra’s al Ghul.

Ra’s is there to fuck with Tim - and Bruce, but mostly Tim - for the hell of it, and Tim is like oh, you son of a bitch when he realizes Ra’s is there? But Ra’s’ paperwork is on the up and up, or at least enough so Bruce and whoever else can’t prove it isn’t and other *hand wavy* plot reasons means they can’t get rid of him through legal means, which just has Ra’s being more >:DDDDDDD about things and Tim plotting murder -

“Hypothetically, Bruce. Because of the thing where we don’t kill, remember? Hahaha.”

- Because the usual threats and whatnot don’t work on Ra’s to get him to fuck right on out of Gotham.

And Ra’s is like  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ might as well make Tim’s life miserable by being a complete bastard while his minions rebuild all the sekrit bases and and so on Tim razed to the ground in the latest go ‘round between the two of them.

(It’s the third time in as many years and as fun as it is matching wits with Tim and such, it’s also time-consuming and dare he say it, boring in the rebuilding phase? That and it’s just, idk, okay, hilarious.)

Shenanigans?

Ra’s calling Tim down during a fencing demonstration/class/whatever to help him demonstrate something. Tim glaring at him the whole time and everyone being like ??? because what is happening right now??? while the two of them trade not so veiled threats and the like?

Jason being all awkward about talking to Tim while having the Bad Touch talk to him in regards to the way Ra’s is a little too...Weird(TM) about Tim and Tim seriously not getting what Jason’s saying at first for maximum shenanigans?

(And when he does he’s like “...” because it’s really not like that, but also how can he explain the whole Tim is Robin and Ra’s is a bastard who wants to recruit him or whatever without actually telling him he’s Robin??? So it’s like. More shenanigans.)

And then some incident where Tim rescues damsel-in-distress!Jason and (literally) sweeps him off his feet in the process and it’s like.

Tim doing his best not to give himself away, but Jason’s not an idiot and how can he not recognize Tim’s voice, and then it’s just.

Jason yelling at Bruce because Tim is a kid - “Okay, wait, no, Jason - “ - seriously you asshole. Also, in case you haven’t noticed, Tim is also a human disaster - “Hey!”

Bruce just “...” at this kid yelling at Batman because Tim’s his ~friend and he’s not at all impressed with Batman and it’s kind of great?

(Dick and other assorted Bats and Birds and so on off to the side just watching all this happen sharing a bowl of popcorn because this is the best thing to happen ever, holy shit.)

Ra’s continues to shenanigate until the school year is over and Tim and Jason are both >:(((((((((((((((((((( at him, and then, idk, stuff?

Something, I ran out of steam because mostly it’s about Ra’s messing with Tim for the hell of it and Tim being all >:((((((((((((((( at him because they can’t get rid of him and it’s all in the name of shenanigans???