#and she's right in the middle of her character arc

[fixyourwritinghabits]

Hello! I have a protagonist, I have her personality, internal goal, internal motivation, internal conflict, I have her character arc, knowing where she is at the start, middle and end of the story in terms of personal growth. But I am not sure how to execute it, I struggle with plot. I don't always know how I am going execute this character arc. What type of scenes could work for this. How do you figure out how to execute a character arc and finding the plot?

This sounds like you have a great internal plot without knowing the external kick-off, and believe me, I've been in the same boat. I just wrapped up a story that's been percolating for years in my brain, but obviously, you don't want to wait years!

Figure out genre and type. First, you need to figure out what genre you want to tell this story in. Take a look at your bookshelf or recent check-outs and think about what stories you gravitate toward. If it's sci-fi, is it giant space operas or telling very human stories about androids? If it's fantasy, what do you seem to prefer? Cosy mystery or hard detective novel? By type, are you a multi-narrative reader, or do you prefer a more focused first person account? Would you feel more comfortable writing for teens or adults? Even if you pick one thing and switch to another later, really sitting down and thinking about it is going to give you a guideline on how to carry out the story.

Nail down the inciting event. The starting plot of most stories goes something like this: your main character lives in their ordinary world, and then something suddenly shakes that up. It can be a break-up. It can be a dragon. It can happen before the novel starts, and your character explains how they got there afterwards. Regardless, something turns your character's life upside down and they're not going to find any peace until they undergo that internal journey you've laid out for them - with some prodding from the external plot.

Tie the external journal to the internal one. I'm saying this like it is easy, but trust me, I know it isn't. You've got one track of the story figured out, though, and that's half the battle. You character needs to change, and you know how. The external plot is you building scenarios and situations that will spur this change onward. Needing a fake date for the prom spirals into complicated situations in which your character realizes she's in love with her fake date, or figures out he's an evil alien plotting to take over the world. The drama is what you make of it.

Don't worry about getting it right the first time around. The first version of my story involved a completely different make-up of characters and situations. It went through a few shake-ups before settling down into what it is now. The only thing that remained integral to the plot is a cranky ferret. Don't let this scare you away! It's a natural part of the process, when writing, to deviate from what you originally conceived. You will end up with a better and more satisfying story by the end of the process.

When it comes to knuckling down and writing, I highly recommend finding a plot structure you like and following it for the first draft. That doesn't mean you have to stick with that structure, but it's a great way to figure out how to tie the external plot to the internal one. You can also check out the following tags:

Plotting

Outlining

Plot

Organization 

Subplots

External Conflict

Internal Conflict

Drafting

[sha-brytols]

hii i haven't followed your blog for long so im not sure if you've made a post w this same premise before but i didn't really care for justice before i found your blog and now im really quite fond of him.

i wanted to ask, have you ever thought about a justice romance route? not necessarily one that involves anders less but one that cares about justice more than what we're given in game (though da2 is not kind to either justice or anders). i would like to hear your thoughts on what a justice route could've been, or at least like, an ideal of it

man i'm glad i converted yall to justice nation and you see me as the Justice Blogger but i'm gonna be real with you i'm nowhere near talented enough to come up with a full-fledged romance myself. i can talk about how i Wish he was involved in the andersmance though? it's self indulgent and probably super fucking cringe so don't necessarily take it as me thinking i could do better LOL

usually what i'm really looking for when i think about his role in a romance is an actual faithful extension of his awakening character arc. he's a romaaaantic he loves love and feelings and he's so passionate about the beauty of the mortal world. my headcanon was always that the reason anders latches onto hawke so quick is because justice was drawn to them (parallels to justice asking the warden's counsel because they seem to be of good character vs anders pouring his heart out to hawke because he feels like he can trust them).

i wrote this whole meta before about how hawke might represent to justice his own personal proof of self. aura was kristoff's wife; he loved her because kristoff loved her. karl was anders' lover; he loved him because anders loved him. but hawke is someone he met completely on his own. he fell in love with them of his own volition, and if he can have his own love that's independent of the people who were once his hosts, doesn't that prove that he's a person in his own right? i like playing with that. was it anders who fell in love first, or justice? does it matter? does it matter to hawke? just something that would've been nice to explore. i haaaaate that justice gets reduced to the angry demon that makes anders blow up the chantry. he was a character in awakening, and he should've been a character in da2.

i can't speak for literally anyone else LOL but i like playing with hawke's own relationship to justice. esther fundamentally doesn't understand him and just thinks of him as a weird voice in anders' head. the thought of him not only being a part of anders, but also a part of their relationship, completely escapes her. but the parts of anders that she loves most are the parts that are shaped by justice, so on some level she's in love with him without realizing it. but there's plenty of other ways to play it. @mageknife incorporating justice into the romance through hawke's own spirit companion is fun. @lottiesnotebook has so. many. good. fics. about justice's active role in the romance, both for anders and hawke. it really just depends on how much you subscribe to the belief that justice is an extension of anders or a separate entity (or somewhere in the middle). i get that "they're the same guy" is the common rationale the game uses, but there is at least Some divide obviously.

i don't even really necessarily think justice has to play a Huge role in the romance. i'd just like a role. something similar in scope to spite and lucanis but also actually written by someone who likes romance and didn't just take it because the other guy got laid off midway through LOL.

[one-pissed-off-child]

hey. hey guys. hi yeah. what if it's not Ada who dies? what if it's Prospero? Y'know. the one person Annabel considers a Proper Friend? What would that do to her? What would it do

[greencloakedfae]

How do we feel about the idea that Sofia hunts Nell down so intensly could be in part due to jealousy?

Its very clear that Sofia is very obsessive about hunting down Nell to frame her for Lord Blancheford's murder. Like she doesn't really need to do all of that. She has the benefit of it being her word against theirs, and the social status to back it up, and they quite easily hold the appearance of grieving children seeking out justice for their father through hired bounty hunters and a 40 pound reward on Nell's head. And like, there is something to be said for the fear that Nell may eventually get someone of importance on her side, and as such getting rid of her permanently is in their best interest. However, I think it would add an interesting layer to the whole dynamic to explore Sofia being jealous of Nell.

Because Nell and Sofia are very clearly two characters that are supposed to be similar yet on complete opposite sides. Their connection to magic, their values of protecting their siblings, and their want to have control over their own situations are just some to name a few.

Yet, Nell is able to escape Tottenham through marrying Captain Jackson, and then continues to keep a hold on her freedom through the way she dresses and presents herself, as well as with the support of her family. She even gets offered tenancy of the Talbot. It's not without consequences obviously, we see it all throughout the show, but she still has a lot more freedom than you'd expect for a woman of that time. Sofia however is still trapped. Her whole life is dictated for her thanks to her high status, and when her father dies, she only just gets a taste of some semblance of power over her own situation through running the estate (though this would be on the down-low and probably with credit attributed to Thomas) and learning magic offered by Poynton. And even then, she's still disregarded and disrespected by the men around her.

It wouldn't surprise me if a large motivation in hunting down Nell for Sofia is the satisfaction of stripping Nell of her freedom. This woman, who is so similar to her yet just because of the family she is born into, gets to have what Sofia can't. And in a 'If I can't have it, neither can you' type of way, I think Sofia would take that and internalise it until it becomes all consuming. Probably convincing herself that once Nell has been stripped of her freedom, she will finally get her own.

[fictionadventurer]

An underrated benefit of love triangles is that they allow you to have a love story where the ending isn't immediately obvious. In your standard romance, the two leads meet, and then it's just a matter of time until they hit the plot beats that lead to the happily ever after. But the love triangle gives you two plotlines! Two different dynamics! Two valid directions for the plot to veer that will still lead to a romantic happy ending without that ending being a foregone conclusion.

The main character can grow and change in multiple different ways because there are two men on equal standing with her, who can have an influence on her in different ways, giving her multiple different lenses to help her understand who she is and who she really wants to be. When it's done right, the story will be satisfying no matter what the endgame is, because the point is going along on the journey and seeing who the characters become. And the great thing is that you don't know who they'll become because there are two valid options, so the entire story can be surprising, which is so refreshing when so many love stories are so predictable.

[maskedbyghost]

Simon knew marriage came with adjustments, but nothing could have prepared him for life with a writer.

It wasn’t just the weird questions—though there were plenty of those—it was the way your mind never seemed to slow down. You’d be doing something completely normal, like folding laundry, and suddenly stop, eyes going distant.

He’d barely have time to ask what was wrong before you’d rush off to scribble something down, muttering about plot twists and character arcs.

Sometimes, he’d wake up in the middle of the night to find you sitting up in bed, phone screen lighting up your face as you frantically typed notes because “this idea can’t wait until morning.”

It meant half-finished coffee cups scattered around the house, abandoned when inspiration hit.

It meant narrating your own actions under your breath, like “she sighed, stretching her arms above her head” while actually doing it, which always made him raise an eyebrow.

And then there were the moments that made him question everything, like when you casually asked if he thought someone could realistically survive being shot twice in the chest or how long a body would take to decompose in a swamp. He used to answer with concern. Now, he barely looked up. “For a book?” “For a book.”

At first, he thought the strangest part was the research, but then he realized it was how easily you pulled him into it. You used him for everything—testing out fight scenes by making him grab your wrist so you could figure out how a character would escape, running your hands over his shoulders and down his arms as you mumbled about muscle structure and “what kind of build do you think my main guy should have?”

You studied him constantly, stealing phrases he said, describing his expressions in your notes, even admitting once that a few of your male characters had a bit of his attitude.

And then there was the way you used him for other inspiration. He figured it out one evening when he saw you sitting on the couch, staring at him with that look—one that usually meant you had something on your mind, but this time, you weren’t saying anything. Just watching.

He glanced over from where he was cleaning his gun. “What?”

You didn’t answer right away, just tilted your head slightly. “I think I want to write a new scene.”

He raised his brow, setting his things aside. “What kind of scene?”

A small smile played on your lips as you stood, walking toward him. “Something a bit messy.”

Simon leaned back, arms resting lazily on the couch as he looked you up and down. “You need details, then?”

“Mhm.” You straddled his lap, fingers toying with the hem of his shirt. “Need to get it just right.”

He smirked, his hands settling on your waist. “That why you’re lookin’ at me like I’m about to be put to work?”

“You don’t mind a little hard work, do you?” you teased, nails scraping lightly against his skin.

His grip tightened, voice low. “Not if you’re gonna make it worth my while.”

Much later, when you were tangled in the sheets, catching your breath, you rolled over and reached for your phone. Before you could even unlock it, a strong arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you back against Simon’s chest. “Nope,” he muttered against your shoulder.

You laughed. “I just had a thought—”

“Don’t care.” His voice was warm and heavy with sleep. “Whatever you’re about to write down, you can remember it in the morning.”

“But—”

A hand slid down your hip, fingers pressing into your skin in a way that made you shiver. “I said, in the morning,” he murmured, his lips brushing against your ear. Then, just to make sure you listened, he added, “Be a good girl and go to sleep.”

Your entire body heated at the words, your brain short-circuiting for a second before snapping into overdrive. Without a word, you bolted upright, nearly diving for your phone as you started typing furiously.

Simon groaned, dragging a hand down his face. “Are you serious?”

“Shhh,” you hushed him, fingers flying across the screen. “This is really good.”

-------------------------------------------

@daydreamerwoah

[lovelywritinglady]

For our little writers' Art Trade...! Gyomei has no idea how much his small Fem!Reader lover enjoys seeing her beloved show his strength like he does during the Training Arc... Honestly, it's a HUGE turn-on to see him move a boulder with ease or stand in the middle of flames while balancing heavy weights over his back... Or see him hugging kitties. Sadly, Reader is weak and can only help train Demon Slayers by feeding them, much like Tengen's wives do. She is kinda motherly and that in return turns Gyomei on SO HARD. Where she is weak, he is strong, and vice versa. Maybe some smut? Maybe they sneak out to take out the NEED they lit in each other? I would be eternally thankful!

I shall do my best!!

Strength and Weakness

Gyomei Himejima x Fem!reader

In which you and your strong lover cannot contain the burning love for each other even in important times.

Fluff, SMUT, size kink, praise, outside sex, desperation sex, maybe out of character Gyomei.

It’s been nearly four weeks since the training with the Hashiras began. You had been working with your husband, Gyomei, to wip these young demon slayers into shape. However, most of them have yet to show true promise and the few who you think could are still training with the other Hashira. Knowing that the only reason that they are even going through such rigorous training is because of Muzan. The mere thought of Muzan would make anyone here shiver with either anticipation for a fight or pure fear.

Today marked the third day that this batch of young demon slayers were attempting to push the massive boulder that your husband had told them to move. It’s size was impressive to say the least but to your husband it was child’s play. He was strong and was considered the strongest Hashira around.

You could definitely attest to that as through out your relationship with the strong man, you had seen him push boulders nearly five times the one that he’s making these young demon slayers push, and for much longer. He was truly an impressive man and you knew that you had been blessed to have him as yours and only yours. However, it’s had been nearly four weeks since your husband last touched you.

Four weeks since you had felt his strong arms around your body in glorious passion. You were beginning to get antsy and it didn’t help when you saw his strong arms and ripped muscles flex as he pushed boulders or showed how to say his mantra at the waterfall training area. Your body flowed with desire for him and you could tell he felt the same. Seeing him being so soft and kind to the students ignited a fire within you. Not to mention the time he was absentmindedly holding a small black and white kitten while he was giving instructions. It didn’t feel fair but you knew that waiting was the right thing to do as you didn’t want any of the students to see the two of you in such a way.

Just as you were trying to think of anything else the very man in question passed by you pushing a boulder. His face calm as he chanted his mantra. While his muscles were in full display as the veins in his arms were bulging out. God you loved him. God how much you needed him. You were glad In that moment that he couldn’t see as the look you were giving him was simply sinful. Your body felt hot as your pussy ached with the absence of his cock. You needed him, your craved him and you knew it was only a matter of time before you were going to snap. You heard footsteps behind you and turned around to see one of the young demon and quite tired demon slayer students.

“Mrs. Himejima, I’m sorry to ask you this, but when do you think dinner will be ready?” One of the young demon slayers asked you with a strained voice as politely as he could manage.

“In about five minutes, tell the others for me will you?” You responded giving the poor tired boy a sweet smile as you did your best to push down the burning desire you had for your husband.

Meanwhile…

Gyomei had just wrapped up the waterfall demonstration as he noticed some of the young demon slayer students practically sprinting to the area that he knew his sweet wife was in. He decided to go there himself needing to hear your sweet voice after a long days of hearing the complaints of others. He sighed wiping the tears that had recently streamed down his face doing his best to look presentable to you. Soon, he had made it to you as a smile was present on his face.

To him, you were the very definition of perfection. Despite your physical weakness, you were kind. And to him, that was the greatest strength that anyone could have. He admired you for that and your kindness was one of the many reasons that he fell in love with you in the first place. He may not be able to see you but his soul knew that you were his and he was yours. And like you, he was getting very impatient for you. Hearing you day and day out being so sweet to these poor kids and how much you wanted to help him made him incredibly grateful and not to mention horny. He neeed you and he knew you needed him too. Now, he was probably the most patient man out there but when it came to you, it was though all reason and logic left him completely.

The thought of the way your smaller body sucked him in like it was meant to make him take a deep breath. His cock was beginning to grow and he tried his best to rid himself of such impure thoughts but hearing you now speaking so gently, so motherly, make him want to take you into the woods and make you the mother that he knew that you wanted to be. He couldn’t take it anymore.

“Honey, would you like some too?” You asked suddenly as Gyomei had realized he was just standing here lost in the sinful thoughts of you.

“Yes my dear, thank you.” He responded after a few moments taking the massive plate of rice balls that you had made shivering slightly at the warm touch of your fingers brushing against his.

“You’re welcome! I made those just for you. I know you’ve been working really hard!” You beamed at him doing your best not to lose control at the mere sight of your husbands tall godlike stature in front of you. His sleeves were pulled up to his elbows as you had full view of his muscular arms still wet from the waterfall as his veins were in full view. You were doing your best but were practically drooling from just his arms. “Fuck.” You breathed out

“What was that, darling?” He asked putting one of his very large hands on your cheek, stroking it softly.

“N-nothing!” You chirped feeling slinky embarrassed for not keeping it together. “I hope you like them!” You quickly added

“I’m sure I will! If they are made by my sweet wife, then I know I’ll love them.” Gyomei spoke as pure adoration was lacing every word.

“Love?” You whispered

“Yes?” He asked bending down as he knew you needed to tell him something that only he needed to hear.

“I need you.” You whimpered finally admitting the thing you’ve needed to for four weeks now. “I know that we need to be professional but I can’t stand it anymore, I need you my husband. I need you. Please.” You added sounding so desperate so needy and who was Gyomei to deny you.

Without so much as a word, he set his plate gently down on a long and grabbed your hand as softly as he could and began walking into the woods a little too quickly. You began stumbling on your feet, barely tripping. Because of this, your husband quick as he could picked you up bridal style and now quicker than before, carried you far into the woods where he was positive that no one would wander. The very last thing he wanted was for someone’s innocent eyes to see what sinful acts he was about do upon his sweet wife.

Soon, he had found a suitable spot and had gently put you down on the soft grass. You hadn’t stopped looking at him the entire time as your mid was swimming with hundreds of scenarios that could happen in this very forest. Pussy was now soaking due to your excitement and impatience. Gyomei knew this as he could feel your wetness as he carried you earlier as his own make a sizable spot on his pants.

Gyomei then kneeled down and hovered over your smaller frame. He then without warning latched himself onto your neck. Kissing it roughly then softly allowing for you to fully grasp the sensation. And grasp you did as your whole body jerked with every kiss and every nip he was giving you. Your moans were loud and it was evident that he was doing well but could tell you needed more.

“Oh god, Gyomei please I need you.” You moaned out solidifying what he already knew.

“I know my love, I know.” He breathed out as he decided to start kissing down your chest more leaving a massive trail of love marks and kisses making your head spin as you grabbed a massive fistful of his spiky hair causing him to loudly grunt. He began sucking the skin on your hip making you buck up in response.

“Please!” You whined out needing more than this.

“Patience darling.” He whispered pressing kisses down your pussy causing your back to arch.

Without warning, he pushed your panties to the side and latched himself on your clit sucking it softly. His tongue began circling it making you moan your husbands name louder. Gyomei then proceeded to insert one of his large fingers into your needy hole and began pumping it in the way he knew you loved.

“Yes, yes, don’t stop. I’m gonna cum soon.” You moaned out pushing his head down against you as you began impinge is face softly.

He hummed in response as he inserted another finger slightly picking up the pace as he began scissoring your hole so that you were ready for him. Gyomei was content in his work as being intimate with you like this made him feel so accomplished. Knowing the he was the one to make you feel this good make his cock ache in his pants even more than it already had. Feeling bold, he decided that it was best to insert one more of his thick fingers.

“Gyomei!” You screeched as your climax had finally reached it peak. Your juices flowing into your husbands mouth as he greedily drank then with pleasure. Your then squeezed his head from the overstimulation you were feeling. You moaned his name over and over again as your vision went blurry and body numb from your orgasm. When he finally finished his meal, he lifted his head and gave you a sweet smile, his face covered in your pleasure.

“You did well, love. Would you like to continue?” He asked making sure you were going to be okay taking him.

“Y-yes. I need you.” You whimpered coming down from your incredible high that only Gyomei could give you.

“Good.” He spoke as his voice suddenly got deeper.

“Would you like me to take care of you?” You asked sitting up slightly as you watched him take off his clothes.

“I just need to feel you as you are. I’m getting rather impatient now my love.” Gyomei said as he suddenly picked you up as he latched his lips hungrily onto your own. You wrapped your arms around his strong neck as your boobs pressed against his hard chest.

Your eyes widen at the ferocity of his kiss. His tongue mixing with yours without warning. A moan escaped from his throat and that very sound sent shivers or pleasure down your spine. His arms gripped your smaller body as one of his hand heals you against him as the other gripped your ass firmly. You were shaking from this needing more.

“Honey..” you whined out.

But as soon as your spoke, your husband took his hand off your ass and desperately undid his pants, freeing his hard and sensitive cock. He the, rather boldly, grabbed your panties and ripped them off of your body like he was picking a flower.

“G-gyomei.” You stuttered shocked at his eagerness.

“Just need you and they were in the way of you.” He grunted and you whimpered my his show of strength. “Are you ready, dear?” He added making sure to take time to make sure you were comfortable.

“Mhmmm.” You moaned out

“Use your words sweet one.” Gyomei calmly asked.

“Yes! Please fuck me!” You cried out desperately feeling more and more desperate the longer this gets drawn out.

“Good girl.” He whispered in your ear as he lined himself with your pussy.

You felt the thick tip of his cock beginning to push in. You were more than ready to take him, wet from your previous orgasm. However, your husband, was not a small man. Meaning his cock was huge and no matter how long you prepared yourself, it would always be a slight challenge to take him. You were a smaller woman after all.

The burning sensation as his cock entered you made you suck on your breath at the pain. You gripped onto his shoulders digging into his skin. He grunted softly feeling how tight your pussy was against him a small smile graced his scarred face as the sensation he was longing for, praying for, was finally here after so long. Soon, after taking his time, his cock filled you up completely making you moan out his name. He stayed still allowing for you to adjust even more.

“Y/n, my darling, I’m going to move now. Is that okay?” He asked you softly as you felt his hands drift down to your ass once again.

“Yes!” I cried out with clear frustration in your voice.

“Good.” Gyomei responded

He then moved his hips slowly making sure that he wasn’t going to hurt you. Hearing your whimpers make him feel slightly crazy but he knew going too fast now would make you not be able to walk the next day. And he certainly didn’t want to embarrass you. However, your next words surprised him.

“Gyomei,dammit, stop being so nice to me and fuck me. I need it.” You cried out almost angry.

And that was the very encouragement he needed. Gyomei then pulled his cock out, only leaving the tip in making you whine in response before snapping his hips hard.

“Oh fuck!” You cried out as tears began pricking your eyes.

Your husband gripped your hips and ass as he began fucking you relentlessly. His pace was quick as his cock was hitting your cervix hard making your eyes roll back. He then began kissing and sucking on the most sensitive part of your neck making you moan loud. Your body was completely and utterly his in this moment as he was fucking you like never before. His grip on your ass would leave bruises and you knew that, not that you minded. Gyomei was grunting loud as he was pounding you in the air. Holding you like you weighed nothing. Using your body to his liking and god you loved it. You let him know how much you loved it scratching his back and moaning his name like a mantra. As you scratched you made sure not to hurt him.

“Harder my love, dig into my flesh!” He yelled out before crashing his lips hungrily onto yours.

And so, you did. You dig as deep and hard as you could as your husband went even faster than before making your mind and body feel like it was floating in ecstasy. The pain you felt before was long gone but you need for your husband grew and grew with each of his powerful thrusts. You began to cry due to overstimulation and the fact that you loved your husband so dearly.

“I-I love you so much.” You blabbered out as your tears poured out from your e/c eyes.

“I love you too, my darling.” Gyomei spoke out as his own tears started to flow as well. It wasn’t uncommon to see him crying but on this occasion it solidified his feelings for you. He was crying because of how much he loved you, how good you felt, and how thankful he was to have a woman like you in his life. And as he was pouring you he makes a silent prayer to God thanking him for you.

His grip on you increased as he felt himself close to cumming. His pace was erratic as the anticipation to his release was overwhelming. Your pussy was so tight, warm, and made perfectly for him. As for you, your own climax was soon as well. He was overwhelming all of your senses as you had already cum. Your body was far more sensitive than it had been in a long time due to waiting so long. You began to shake as you were getting weaker and weaker. However, you knew that even if you let go completely, your husband would hold you up due to his strength.

“Honey, m’gonna cum soon.” You blabbered out looking at his pleasure filled face.

“Me too, my darling, me too. I’m going to cum inside of you. Is that alright?” He asked quickly as his breathing became ragged.

“Y-yes. I want it.” You wined taking your turn to capture his lips with yours as you stuck your tongue in his mouth as your hands found new strength and gripped his hair roughly. His pace quickened as did his breathing. And soon you husband came as he held you closer to him as his dick was inside you fully.

“Oh my y/n, my one, my love.” He moaned out like he was praying a mantra.

You felt his thick cum filling you up like a warm embrace. You felt so full, so warm, so content. And as your husband held you, he brought one of his large hands yo your clit and began rubbing it in small circles, in the way you loved. He used the mixture of his cum and your slick to bring you pleasure. And just like that, you came hard. Your orgasm wracking your body with indescribable pleasure. His cock still stuffed deeply inside you as Gyomei could feel you tightening around him causing him to grunt as he decided to hump you slowly, enjoying the overstimulation that you were giving him.

“My love. Oh god!” You cried out still shaking from your high.

“I love you.” Gyomei whispered in your ear as he brought his left hand up to wipe the sweaty hair off your face as he placed a loving kiss on your forehead.

“I love you too. I’m so glad we did this.” You told him still in his embrace with his cock still inside you.

“Me as well. And as much as I’d love to do this again, we have students to attend too my darling love.” He said hesitantly as he gave you one more forehead kiss.

“Yeah, even if we did have time, I’m not sure my body could handle that again.” You admitted feeling tired. You laid your head on his chest taking deep breaths basking in the after glow of sex.

“Are you tired now?” He asked as he slowly pulled out making you gasp at the empty feeling.

“Yes, very.” You responded doing your best to sad on your own as he put you down. The feeling of his cum running down your legs made you shiver with the memory of recent events.

“Good I know you’ve been more restless recently. So I suggest you nap for awhile. I’ll tell the students.” He suggested as he put his clothes back on, doing his best to look at leafy semi presentable.

“I think I’ll take you up on that offer.” You yawned taking his arm to balance yourself. “But first I think I need to clean myself first.” You acknowledged feeling a bit gross due to the amount of sweat that was just on your body.

“It’s as though you read my mind, my love.” He spoke with a smile as he hoisted you up again. You were more than accepting of his gesture as your legs were too wobbly to walk properly. “There is a spring near by so we’ll go there and cleanse you, my darling.” He spoke softly sensing you were falling asleep.

“Thank you, my love.” You sleepily replied as you closed your eyes and snuggled into his warm embrace.

Gyomei then took you to that spring and clean you up all while you were too tired to do really anything. Your husband didn’t mind whatsoever as he loved doting and taking care of you. He was a lucky man and he knew that. Once you were all clean, he put your clothes back on your tired body and walked back to camp. As he did some of the students were questioning why you were in his arms and if you were okay. But he simply replied that you needed rest. Soon, he found a nice shady tree and place you under it. The grass was soft enough and this he kissed your lips and said a silent prayer to the gods for you. He then went back to the students and resumed his training to make sure these young demon slayers were ready for the fight with Muzan.

Thank you so much for reading!! I did a trade with @petitelepus so be sure to check out their content too!! 💜

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•I do NOT own any characters except y/n•

-L.W.L

[xyywrites]

How to use weather as a mood enhancer in scenes

Weather is more than a backdrop—it’s a tool that can subtly amplify the mood, tension, or theme of your scenes. Done well, it can evoke emotions and foreshadow events without being heavy-handed. 

Melancholy:

The rain tapped against the window, steady and unrelenting, much like the weight pressing down on her chest. She pulled the blanket tighter around her shoulders, wishing the storm outside could drown out the one inside.

Restlessness:

The wind howled through the cracks of the old cabin, rattling the loose shutters. It wasn’t the kind of wind that swept things away—it was the kind that stayed and gnawed, a restless echo of her own unease.

A Happy Scene with Gloomy Weather:

Rain poured down in sheets, soaking her to the bone, but she didn’t care. She laughed, spinning in the middle of the street, her soaked dress clinging to her legs. For once, the world’s misery couldn’t touch her.

A Tragic Scene on a Bright Day:

The sun was too bright, its warmth mocking the cold numbness spreading through him. People bustled past, smiling under the clear blue sky, while he sat on the curb, clutching the letter that had just ended everything.

In a Chase Scene:

Fog blanketed the forest, turning the trees into looming specters. Each snap of a branch or crunch of leaves felt amplified, like the forest itself was working against him. He couldn’t see his pursuers, but he could feel them closing in.

During a Confrontation:

The wind picked up as they stood in the open field, her hair whipping around her face like a fury she couldn’t contain. Lightning cracked in the distance, illuminating the raw anger in his eyes. Neither of them would back down.

Redemption Arc:

The first snow of the season fell gently, covering the world in white. It felt like a fresh start, even if he didn’t deserve one. He reached out a hand, watching the flakes melt against his skin, and wondered if he could ever be that clean again.

Grief:

The fog rolled in every morning like clockwork, smothering the town in its heavy embrace. It had been that way since the accident, as if even the weather couldn’t bear to let go of what had been lost.

Loneliness:

The snow piled up around the cabin, burying the path and muffling every sound. She’d never felt the silence so keenly before, as if the world had decided to forget her existence entirely.

Isolation:

The heat hung heavy in the air, making it hard to breathe. The cracked earth stretched out in every direction, offering no shade, no solace. She was utterly alone.

Subtle Anxiety:

A bead of sweat slid down her back, but she wasn’t sure if it was from the heat or the unease that had settled under her skin. The humidity pressed in, making the air feel heavier, like it carried secrets she didn’t want to uncover.

Lingering Sadness:

The drizzle wasn’t enough to drench anyone, but it clung to her skin, a persistent chill she couldn’t shake no matter how fast she walked.

Weather isn’t just a backdrop—it’s a storyteller in its own right. Whether it mirrors your character’s emotions, foreshadows danger, or contrasts with the scene’s tone, it can elevate your writing when used thoughtfully. Just remember: subtlety is key. Let weather enhance your story, not overshadow it.

[beneathsilverstars]

i think if you’re doing mirabelle’s rpg. you have to put isat right in the middle. i think it should go like… she goes through vaugarde collecting the orbs and noticing all these mysteries about her companions and mourning all the frozen towns, and she wants to get to know her friends better, and figure out what’s bothering them and help with it, and go do fun touristy things with them, etc etc, but they have a country to save. there’s no time, and everything is frozen. if that wasn’t the case, they wouldn’t even be traveling together at all! and the whole time mirabelle’s struggling with anxiety and imposter syndrome and the weight of being The Savior. she has to fix things but she can’t, she wants to help her friends but she can’t, she has to change but she doesn’t want to. she’s getting a bad grade in rpg protagonist!!!

but then we hit isat. and you expect it to be the culmination of mirabelle’s arc, but she’s not ready for that yet, just like she’s felt unprepared and unworthy all game, stuck in this role, under the weight of everyone’s expectations — of course doing the thing everyone wants her to do can’t be mirabelle’s defining moment, no matter how much she also believes in the importance of the quest. when she vanquishes the king, it doesn’t actually fix any of her personal problems. it wasn’t even really about her.

instead, the focus of this event is on siffrin, since it turns out the unchanging king was his foil all along, not mirabelle’s. mysteries are answered about both siffrin and the king, but more importantly — this is the turning point for everyone. the result of the most seemingly-stand-offish character’s arc is the key to making progress in everyone else’s: the party admits they care about each other and decides to keep traveling together.

the second half of the game, then, is going backwards through vaugarde, visiting all the same places again. and now that they’re not on their blessed quest in the name of change, they DO have time and they ARE all officially friends. everyone gets a little arc, echoing the five orbs, starting with isat as siffrin’s. they’re still clearing out sadnesses — and there’s some really strong ones as everyone takes stock of how much time has passed and how much damage has been done — but they don’t respawn anymore. people are starting to recover! and instead of dungeon puzzles, there’s fetch quests and mini games as the party helps vaugarde rebuild. a lot of the quests relate to things they saw while frozen, a bunch of mysteries and tragedies that they can finally DO something about. and in the same way, the family can finally get closer and talk about important things and meet each other’s friends/family and share their interests etc etc, all these old mysteries and maybe-some-days getting resolved!

and then, finally. mirabelle has been doing work that she CHOSE, helping vaugarde rebuild. and sometimes people use the opportunity to rebuild differently, but sometimes people just want the same familiar things back, and that’s not actually bad, it’s nothing like being frozen. you can keep living in the same house but making new memories, fixing things as needed, both different and the same. and mirabelle realizes that she doesn’t need to change. she realizes she has changed, and she will keep changing, but she can stay the same the whole time too. she doesn’t need to be what people expect, not the perfect housemaiden or the rpg protagonist savior. she can just strive to be the best version of herself!!

and that’s the end of the game, bc mirabelle isn’t trying to figure out how to do everything right to win the game anymore. she’s just living ^^

[consultingfujoshi]

helly getting to be selfish and make a decision for herself instead of killing herself for a woman she doesn't know :') lovely, the argument against this is just agreeing with lumon that innies aren't people and deserve to die

helly r has always been someone motivated not by what she personally wants for herself but by how most effectively she can give her outie and by extension lumon the middle finger. hanging herself in the elevator, threatening to cut off her fingers. she has never once had any regard for herself. only how she can stick it to the people who put her here. "I'm gonna kill your company". that's what she vowed. and helly r would recognise that allowing mark to leave with gemma and revealing to the world what they did to her would be the end of all of this. she'd finally get her revenge. helly r is someone who would recognise that as a worthy sacrifice. and she tells mark this herself. that it's worth it for what it'll do to lumon. and a version of helly r that cares more about running down a hallway that will eventually lead them into a dead end whilst the woman they just risked everything to save, a woman who's just been held hostage for two years by the company helly hates so deeply, screams and begs for her husband to come with her, not even checking to see if she gets out safely, not even giving her a second glance, is not the helly r that we have come to know. she is not empowered, she is not a revolutionary. she's just another female character whose defining fire was extinguished the second the writers decided to make her a love interest to the male protagonist. I truly don't know where you guys get the idea that markhelly is somehow sticking it to the man by prioritising each other over literally everything else, but from where I'm standing it's just another case of the writers of a tv show forgetting the basic fucking characterisation of their main female character in order to centre her arc around a man. I APPRECIATE the sentiment that mark and helly have a right to, and maybe its even more thematically impactful to, choose each other with reckless abandon, I SEE the point they're trying to make, but it has come at the cost of helly's characterisation literally all season and the bottom line is that it's really fucking disappointing to see yet another female character who was the strongest personality in the cast at one point go through this kind of degeneration of drive and motivation because of her feelings for a man. its fucking boring and overdone and i miss season 1 helly so bad it hurts

[ghostlandtoo]

thinking about the abandonment issues present in every member of the buckley-diaz lineage…

1) buck. like, obviously, number 1 is buck. we don’t have to rehash this. we all know. familial, romantic, and platonic—that man bas been abandoned by many and it has deeply affected his psyche. NEXT!

2) christopher. he also has abandonment issues—mostly stemming from shannon leaving and her death, but from eddie as well. eddie did miss out of the early years of his life, and chris might not remember that as clearly as shannon being gone, but he did tell eddie “i miss you all the time.” and now, he’s been in texas for however many months, and while that’s so his own choice, he can still feel abandoned by the fact that eddie took so long to move/make a decision regarding that. additionally, his brief period two-timing middle schoolers because they end up leaving anyway. we can attach his ideas about dating to eddie’s series of failed relationships.

3) eddie. firstly because of his dad not being present while he was growing up. and then because shannon left him. i thought you were coming back. shannon’s death right after she asked for a divorce means eddie’s grief is such a complicated thing, and he never had to come to terms with the fact that she wanted to willfully leaving him (and chris) again, besides the fact that she left them by dying. and we can say that during the lawsuit arc, eddie also felt abandoned by buck! he needed buck during that time, but buck separated himself from the entire 118, but eddie and chris specifically.

4) bobby. honestly he’s right up there with buck, but this latest episode really let us see how his dad’s death and his mom walking out on them deeply affected bobby. “i will not apologizing for leaving,” his mom says, about 40 years after the act and knowing what bobby has gone through since. (and whatever you may think about bobby forgiving her, it is both the show’s MO to forgive, and also bobby is an alcoholic in a 12-steps program. he forgives.) we see in s1 especially that his self-worth and his history effects what he thinks he can bring to relationships, even friendships, and how he closed himself off from them.

i think the show has shown all of them working through this, even if christopher and eddie are still in the middle of this emotional arc. buck still has his emotional reactions to him perceiving being left, and knows that and works to right it. bobby has forgiven his mom and dad in a way that works for him and his recovery. so on buck’s side of the family tree, they’ve worked through their issues to some degree.

now the diaz side… shannon truly haunts eddie and chris’ relationship, in the way that they’ve never talked about her directly to each other. it’s eddie passing a letter along, it’s christopher running away instead of talking. it’s something that they need to actively address with each other, rather than letting her hang over their necks.

i’ve always loved how bobby and eddie are mirrors of each other with the same grief, and it’s interesting to me with how they’re mirrored with bobby believing his mom would come back and eddie believing shannon would, too. eddie might have worked through some of that grief with kim-as-shannon but it’s still there, because he’s never dealt with how it affected christopher. “she left me, not him,” he asserted to everyone (the same way ann left tim but not bobby, since bobby chose to stay), but that doesn’t change the fact that christopher was left too.

and from what we know about the show and how it handles these topics, it probably won’t be the same as every fanfic of eddie and chris cutting helena and ramon (eddie would not.), and them having complicated feelings over shannon and each other, but the nuance is already there in how these issues run through the family, and how they’re everpresent in their narrative and character foils.

[queers-gambit]

Let the Redeemed Tell Their Story [ pt. 2 ]

part one: Not So Heavenly Surprise

pt 1: Let the Redeemed Tell Their Story

prompt: reunions are bittersweet. feelings are hard. times are tough, redemption is sought, goodbyes feel impossible; there's blood in the snow, tears in their eyes, and a haunting goodbye in the air.

pairing: Joel Miller x female!wife!reader

fandom masterlist: HBO's The Last of Us

word count: 7.8k+

note: in my best Tom Segura voice, "get. fucking. ready." -> second 24-27 from this TikTok for reference

second note: broken up into two parts. pt 1: the reunion, pt. 2: the drama and angst

warnings: suicidal ideology / mention as pertains to Joel's story. we talk death and dead bodies, mentions of dead children. cursing, use of Y/N, so many spoilers, reader insert!! pet names for / by all, step parents are REAL parents, forgiveness, heavy redemption arc, canon-level violence!! small comfort, some fluff, established relationship, and then super-sized angst, author wants you to hurt! oh, and fatal main character injury! maturity and caution required! written before season two! intentional person shift at the end.

❗️season one, episode six (and beyond) spoilers

you will find no comfort here. you've been warned!

Tommy was heard from the mouth of the stable, revealing you grooming and tacking up an angry looking beast the color of an oak tree in the middle of the aisle. "And if you really wanna get under her skin, just start nitpickin' all she does, all right?" He smirked at Ellie, who appeared ghastly that morning. "I'm talkin' the way she makes a fire, fixes food, shoots her gun - "

"You're fixin' for a smack down, Tommy Miller, better watch yourself," you warned with a chuckle. Ellie trudged towards you with her pack - slowing when she noted in the stall just before where you stood, Joel, tacking a chestnut horse.

She didn't question the two horses being fixed up, thinking one was for her and one for you; instead setting her unimpressed glare on Joel. She sneered, "You came here to say goodbye or something?"

"No," Joel answered. "I came here to steal one of these horses and go."

"We woulda gave you one," Tommy offered sadly, looking towards your knowing smirk with confusion.

"I know," older brother assured younger. "But then, this nagging voice just started - "

"All right, fuck off," you chuckled, patting your horse's neck. "Truth is, he changed his mind - don't matter who convinced him or nagged him," your eyes rolled. "You deserve your autonomy, darlin'," you directed at Ellie, turning your gaze to Joel to silently encourage him to speak up.

"She's right," Joel sniffled, approaching Ellie, "you deserve a choice. I still think you'd be better off with Y/N - "

"Let's go," Ellie shoved her pack into Joel's chest.

"Okay," he stiffly accepted, meeting his brother's amused stare before dropping it to you. "You get a choice, too, Y/N."

"I didn't get up early out my warm bed with my long-lost husband for fuckin' nothin', Joel," you scoffed. "Y'all don't know where you're goin', I do. So let's shut up and let's ship out, all right?"

"Okay," again, Joel accepted begrudgingly.

Tommy followed you out of the stables, taking the reins when you handed them for his hold as you helped Ellie acquaint herself with the basics of riding; letting the brothers say goodbye as you offered her a leg-up. "Hold onta both," you told her gently, handing over the reins; her nodding and humming in agreement, letting you adjust the stirrups and latch the last of their packs.

When the brothers pulled out of their hug, Tommy assured, "There's a place for you here. Both of you."

"Countin' on it," Joel agreed. "Can I borrow that?" He asked, looking to the tricked-out rifle on Tommy's shoulder.

"Yeah," Tommy agreed without hesitation.

"'Cause Maria took mine, you know?"

"Already said yes, Joel," he smirked, situating the strap over Joel's shoulder. You turned from Ellie to stand at Joel's side with a fond expression, Tommy looking the pair of you over before bidding, "Adios, big brother."

Joel nodded, hand lifting to squeeze your bicep to let you have your own goodbye. "You behave while I'm gone, boy."

"You know I won't," he teased, something in his eyes shifting. "You be careful out there. Watch each other's backs..."

"We will."

"Want all y'all comin' home," he tried to smile, opening his arms and bringing you in for a tight embrace. However, when he went to pull back, you tightened your embrace - just needing an extra moment with your best friend. "You be fuckin' careful, hear?" He hissed in your ear, throat tight with emotion. "Your nephew's gonna need you. I'm gonna need you, too."

"Can't get rid of me so easily," you quipped, patting his shoulder roughly. "I'll be seein' you real soon."

"Better be, babygirl," he sniffled, the pair of you letting go at the same time. Joel was mounted in his saddle, looking away to give the pair of your privacy, but Ellie watched the entire exchange with a somber expression; having witnessed one too many goodbyes in her short lifetime. "All right, now," Tommy held your horse in place as you expertly mounted, "bring me back a souvenir, yeah?"

"You're an idiot," you chuckled, nudging your horse on to lead Joel and Ellie to the gate; which opened upon your command. "Hey - love you," you reached for Tommy's hand; him lifting to grab yours as the horse prodded along.

"Love you, too, babygirl," he smiled, nodding as he was forced to let go; catching his brother's eye as they passed through the gate after you. They nodded with intention, never needing to say many words, and Tommy watched from inside the territory as you and Joel set out into the wilderness. "Close it up," he waved to the guardsmen.

Ellie decided within a day she liked you.

There had been a strange sort of jealousy within a couple hours of listening to you and Joel recount memories of the past; but soon, you had looped the girl into conversation with shitty jokes with shitty punchlines based on shittier puns. Joel sighed, "Ah, fuck, there's two of 'em now."

It spurred the pair of you into deeply personal missions to annoy the man; instantly teaming up to put your best shitty jokes to use. Then came the construction of new jokes, which made Joel smile as he listened to you bicker about the proper nuances of puns. The conversation naturally then lulled into embarrassing stories - of which, you had plenty about Joel. The jealousy of sharing Joel's attention soon morphed into appreciation as the man loosened up under your warm gaze and silky voice; revealing a new side of himself, a part of him Joel had long since thought dead. That night, Ellie noticed the way Joel slept leaning back into your chest when camp was made, thinking he must've felt safe enough to doze even for a couple hours.

By the second day, you had convinced Joel to let Ellie try her hand at Tommy's rifle; assuring you've handled it before and was safe to use. Your own wasn't anything impressive, that left to the ex-Army Ranger; so, naturally, it remained strapped to your saddle as the three of you took time to set up a practice firing range.

"How do you know how to do all this?" Ellie asked you.

"Tommy taught me," you smirked. "I used to be afraid of guns, you know. Didn't fuckin' like 'em."

"What? No way," she scoffed, noting the handgun holstered in the back of your jeans.

"Uh-huh," Joel returned to the fallen tree you'd posted at from setting up a target few yards out. "Wouldn't let me keep one in the house."

"We had a kid runnin' around!" You reminded. "That's how accidents happen!"

"Why didn't you like 'em?" Ellie wondered.

"I was an ER doctor," you revealed. "Saw a lot of unnecessary bullet holes in too young'a bodies. Tend to develop a dislike after seein' shit like that."

"Makes sense," she nodded, taking up the rifle. "Guess it's normal now for everyone to know how to shoot and fight, huh?"

"Just the way the world works," you frowned, lifting the binoculars to watch as she fired her first shot. "That's all right, readjust, don't be afraid of the recoil... Take a breath, try again, honey, you got this."

Her second shot went left, hitting a dead tree. You handed Joel the binoculars after the third shot hit a snowbank. He watched the next few rounds hit everything but the target he erected. When Ellie huffed, he noted, "Wide right. Y/N's right, you're flinchin'."

"The target's too small," Ellie deflected.

"I made it bigger than I should've."

"Eject the cartridge," you told Ellie softly.

"And I'm not flinching!"

"I never said you were! That was all him," you blamed Joel.

"Mhm," Joel shared a bemused look over Ellie's head with you.

"The rifle just sucks."

"A good craftsman never blames the tool, darlin'," you advised. "Here, give it. Lemme see."

Ellie sighed, letting you take control of the weapon; kneeling where the gun was propped on the tree. "It doesn't aim right."

"All right."

"You'll see!"

"Hm," you considered, peering through the scope; suddenly acutely aware of Joel posted just behind you.

"See what she's doin'," Joel pointed out to Ellie. "A deep breath in, slow breath out. Then she's gonna squeeze the trigger like she loves it." You tried not to laugh out loud but smiled broadly, lining up your shot as Ellie hummed and peered out the binoculars. "Gentle," Joel narrated, "steady... Nice and slow, baby," he directed at you.

Which made Ellie quip, "You gonna let her shoot this thing or get her pregnant again?" She just smirked knowingly at the exasperated look you and Joel pinned her with.

"I thought we were on the same side - against him, damn, Ellie," you muttered, looking back through the scope.

"It isn't gonna work," she told you. "It doesn't aim right - " But the gunshot cut her off, watching a small plume of debris sprinkle the air from impact. "Youuuu dick."

With a grin, you just shrugged at Ellie, who clocked Joel's look of immense pride. "That's my girl," he muttered, kissing your temple as you handed off the rifle to stand.

On the third day, Ellie rode with you.

"So, what's Ajax mean?" She wondered as you pet your horse's neck.

"I guess Greek mythology's pretty redundant these days," you quipped to Joel, who only shrugged. "Ajax the Great was a mythological hero, second only to Achilles."

"Oh, I've heard of him. There's a part of the body named after him, right?"

"The Achilles Tendon," you nodded.

"Where's that?"

"In the heel. Do you know the story of Troy?"

"Uh..."

"FEDRA ain't teaching mythology, sugar," Joel shot at you playfully.

"Guess not - why would they?" You sighed. "Okay, Ellie, do you know the term Trojan Horse?"

Ajax whinnied to the girl's amusement. "Nope."

"Troy was an ancient civilization, impenetrable. Until the end of the ten-year-long Trojan War when the Greeks tricked them by building this huge wooden horse - but inside, the Greeks were hidden. So, the Trojans, thinking it was a gift of sorts, brought the wooden horse into their city, and as they slept, the Greeks struck and Troy finally fell. So, a Trojan Horse is a term used when the sheep invite the wolves to dinner."

"Oh... Okay, so, who's Achilles?"

"Greatest Greek hero," you boasted. "He was shot through the heel by an arrow, disabling him to his death. Hence the tendon coined after him."

"That's kinda cool. So, Ajax was his second...?"

"Kinda, if you wanna think that. He was another Greek warrior, best around besides Achilles. He played a major role in the Trojan War. Do me a favor, honey," your head turned to direct at Ellie, "and if you ever get your hands on a copy of the Iliad, read it. 'S a great story, bit long - but worth."

"You named your horse after a dead guy?"

You scoffed playfully, "I named my horse after a strong-ass, legendary dead guy, thank you very much. My boy here - most loyal around, would go through a ten-year war with me. Has even saved my ass few times on outings, sensed or heard the Infected before they could get to us."

"No shit? Horses are loyal like that?"

"Oh, yeah. My boy," you patted the dark bay's neck again, "is a friend till death. I raised him... We go on every raid together, so it's only fitting this be our last, right?"

"Hopefully his ankles don't give out," Ellie teased, making you snicker slightly.

"Not like Joel's back, right?"

Ellie snorted and wrapped her arms around your waist comfortably; head resting to the side, allowing you and Joel to smile at each other. When you turned forward, he just watched the pair of you together, his heart hammering for an entirely different reason. When your gaze turned to him again and caught his stare, you offered a look of gentle confusion, earning a mouthed, "I love you," in return. You grinned until your cheeks hurt.

On the fourth, Ellie rode alone on your trusted steed, Ajax; too excited by the freedom of riding in open fields to comment on Joel's tight and intimate holding of you. She trotted along, learned to canter, made laps around the pair that appeared all too at peace grinding against each other, snuggled tight; calling out the occasional riding direction.

It was mildly impressive how Ajax took verbal command, or so it seemed to the 14-year-old. She was beginning to get a sense of why you were so taken with the beast.

On the fifth, she rode with you again to give Joel's not-named-after-a-dead-guy horse a break. Joel was explaining the logistics of various sports, the pair currently on the topic of American football as your trio approached the conjunction on interstates.

"So, basically just moving in one direction," the child simplified.

"Basically," you agreed, "but violent."

"Oh, well. There's that," she mused, holding your waist loosely as Ajax moseyed along.

Noting the I-25 sign, Joel commented, "Well, how 'bout that? Made it in five days."

"Easy days," added Ellie. She squeezed your waist, "I don't know what you were so afraid of."

"Still time to find out," Joel cryptically told her.

Ellie mocked, "'Still time to find out.'" To Joel's unimpressed look at her behind you, she continued in a raspy voice, "The Contractorrrr."

"We missin' something, Y/N?" Joel asked you, ignoring Ellie's self-amusement and your smirk.

"Not every venture is this easy," you shrugged. "Cities are more dense, more room for raiders and Infected to hide out. And bein' we don't frequent 'round here, they got the jump on us already..." The two horses were directed towards the distant city, "We'd all do good bein' on lookout from here out."

"Yes, ma'am," Joel nodded.

"Yes, ma'am."

You smirked at Ellie over your shoulder.

From then on, you were in the lead, navigating the city by the old, rusting signs pointing towards the university campus; the city overgrown with brush, winter killing most to crackle satisfyingly under horse hooves. You nodded to Joel, telling Ellie to hold the reins for you as you both armed yourselves; three heads then on a spin for any sign of life or movement.

Approaching the campus entrance, Ellie read aloud, "'Home of the Big Horns'. What does that mean?"

"Team mascot," you pointed out the charicture, "the rams. It's a kind of sheep."

"Oh, see, Joel?" Ellie noted the nervous energy between the adults, trying to relieve it by offering sweetly, "One step closer to your dream."

It was enough to make you smile at Joel, "The sheep ranch? Really?"

"You get your horses, darlin', don't worry," he eased.

"Uh, guys?" The pair of you glanced at Ellie, who pointed out, "I don't see any Fireflies, though."

"They're probably in the middle - safer that way," you offered, Joel nodding in silent agreement.

"Uh-huh." The arms around your waist tightened and Ajax shifted his weight.

"This way," Joel lead on, you keeping even par.

Through the campus, Ellie gazed around in wonder, your eyes flickering up and down, side to side; never resting in one place for too long. "So these places... People would live here and, like, what? Go to classes and stuff?"

"Yup," answered Joel.

"Even though they were adults."

"Sort-of adults," he corrected. "I think it was just as much about partying and findin' themselves as anythin' else. Figurin' out what they wanted to do with their lives."

Ellie repeated with a breathy chuckle, "What they wanted to do with their lives. That what you did?"

"Sorta... Met Y/N when she was at a school like this," he offered with a sweet smile, "realized she was the woman I wanted to spend my life with."

"You fuckin' butterball," you chuckled, offering him a soft look. "Yeah, he won me over real easy. Was impossible t'say no."

"How'd he do it?"

You shot Joel a coy look, who distracted Ellie, "So I've been thinkin'."

"Mhm?"

"I don't want a sheep ranch, actually. I mean, if the deal is I can do anything?"

"That's the deal."

"Well... When I was a kid, I wanted to be a singer."

Ellie couldn't contain her glee, laughing with disbelief, "Shut up."

"Why is that funny?" Joel looked so vulnerable, it made your heart clench. Only children had this way of unlocking the authentic side of stone cold hearts - Ellie already wedged deep in Joel's.

"Oh, he's got a beautiful voice, darlin'," you tacked on with a grin. "It rumbles like a rain storm. This one time - "

"Baby, don't give her the ammunition - "

Ellie cut Joel off, "You gotta sing something now."

Who immediately refused, "No."

"C'mon, man. I'm not gonna laugh."

"You're already laughin'."

"Yeah, okay, true." Hooves clip-clopped over brick in a distinct echo. "Well, you're singin' for me later. I'm gonna save the fuckin' world, man, it's the least you can do for me."

Joel considered her words for a moment, agreeing, "Fair enough."

"What about you, Y/N?"

"Hm?"

"Dream job - perfect world, no barriers or whatever. Go."

"Oh," you blinked in thought. "Maybe... A historian."

"What? But you're a doctor!"

"Yeah, I know, but you said perfect world, right? I love history but the only career path I could've taken was becomin' a teacher - and I'm none too good with all that."

"She's lyin'," Joel mused, "she's damn good at everythin' she does." Your eyes rolled playfully.

"So why a doctor?"

"Paid more," you joked. "Nah, it just... Felt good helpin' people, fixin' problems. I had a little brother, right? He was a surprise baby, born early, had these medical problems, and I don't know - just really inspired me the way they gave my parents a new hope, fresh outlook on life."

"That's nice. So, ideally, you'd, like, work in a stuffy library?"

"Maybe," you mused. "Get to see all the great cities around the world, recount stories and lore, meet the people, embrace the culture... Sounds pretty cool to me."

"Hm," Ellie smiled, leaning her cheek to your shoulder; a fond smile stretching across your lips as you relished in the feel of a kid depending on you again. The further into campus you got, the stranger sounds that echoed; putting you and Joel on edge. However, the young, sharp eyes of the child riding behind you saw the source of the noises and gaped, "Are those monkeys!?"

Joel offered in explanation, "Must be from the old labs."

"Fuck's sake," you muttered when Ajax side-stepped in annoyance to the scampering creatures; heading bobbing and snorting with mistrust. "Easy, boy, you're all right," you patted the broad neck, Ajax snorting again when the monkeys took off running.

"Look at them go," Ellie laughed.

"First time seein' a monkey?" Joel quipped.

"First time seein' a monkey."

"Y/N," Joel nudged your arm, nodding ahead to a campus directory. There was a spray-painted yellow Firefly on the biomedical science building sign.

Feeling you sit up and situate your rifle with definition, Ellie sighed, "Here we go." Approaching the relatively unaffected building, Ellie pointed out, "Guard stations."

"Mh," Joel hummed. "No guards."

"Uh..."

"Yeah," you breathed.

"Gun?"

"Yeah," you shared a small look of skepticism with Joel.

"What'chu thinkin', darlin'?"

"They could've moved," you shook your head. "Ain't no use theorizing anything until we see for ourselves, right?"

"Right..."

The two horses came to a halt, you offering Ellie one of your arms to help her swing down from Ajax; following suit as Joel did the same. You both left your horses loosely tethered to a tree branch; Ellie arming herself with her handgun as you and Joel did the same - rifles slung over your shoulders.

"Stay close t'me," Joel muttered to you, nodding at Ellie; trio moving forward into the biomedical building as cautiously as possible.

Inside, you were greeted with what appeared to be an abandoned building. The lobby was left in a tattered mess, supplies, machines, papers and more left in disarray as if someone had already picked through everything. Or left in haste.

"There were definitely doctors here," the girl poked through few supplies left on a trolley. "Hey, Doc, these make any sense to you?"

You approached the trolley and leafed through the file left behind; Joel looking over your shoulder, so close, you could feel his warm breath on your neck. After a moment to read over it, you identified, "This is a packing list. Somethin' you make before movin' - when you don't wanna forget the most important shit..."

"They just left?" Breathed Ellie in confusion, thinking they had been waiting for her. Wouldn't they have been? If she was immune? Why leave if they knew she was on the way? Before either adult could answer her, there came a distant clatter from the floor above them; metal hitting linoleum, by the sound of it. "Maybe not all of them..."

"Joel," you reached for his arm when he meant to move forward in investigation. "Look around, baby, ain't nothin' left - shit's already been scavenged over. Or whoever was here, left in a hurry. Should cut our losses and go - I-I can get us on the radio, I'll find Marlene myself - "

"We came all this way, darlin'... We gotta check it out."

"Hey, hey, I get it - I do, Joel, you know I do. But in my experience, noises in abandoned buildings aren't usually friendly. This has bad written all over it."

"It's all right," he soothed, caressing your cheek with his bare hand. "Stick together, we watch each other's back. That's how we stay safe, right?"

You huffed and nodded, knowing it was probably the right thing to do to check for signs of life but every nerve in your body was alight, on fire, begging you to get the hell out of there. Yet as you've done so many times before, you followed Joel; hoping your bravery would pay off towards this act of contrition.

The clattering continued, a sort of trail for you and Joel to follow; Ellie nearly snug between you both, safe. Your teeth clenched and hands held your gun in a steady grip, feeling a renewed sense to protect your husband and his sort-of adopted daughter; love, bravery, adrenaline, and possibly stupidity racing through your veins. Up stairs and down halls, you heard a clash from one of the classrooms; sharing a look with Joel that made you instantly press to the wall, pushing Ellie along with you. His eyes met yours, watching you nod and raise your gun; turning back for the door and wincing as it opened with a creak.

However, inside the mummified room was just a monkey; who screeched in alarm and jumped out the shattered window, leading two more to escape after it. Nobody was sure if they were relieved or disappointed to find the room empty, but Joel still mused, "Well... At least it ain't Clickers."

"Yeah, no Fireflies either," Ellie shot back. "Maybe in all that research, they turned into fuckin' monkeys."

"It ain't no worry, you two," you tired to assure, "I'll get on the radio back home and try to figure this out. All right? C'mon, might be somethin' 'round here that says where they went. Go 'head, look around."

Ellie was already toeing her way through whatever was left on the floor, Joel spying a bulletin board displaying a map. "Y/N?" He called, drawing your being to his side - and Ellie.

"That's where they went?" She asked, using her gun to point at the pinned map to Salt Lake City.

"All the pins lead there," Joel seemingly agreed, gazing over the tricolored pins leading to the city. "Maybe gettin' ahead of the weather, better facilities? I don't know."

Your hand slapped over his mouth and head snapped towards the open window when a voice sounded from below, "This way." With your hand held up, you silently tiptoed your way over, keeping to the shadowed side to peer out, just in time to note four raiders stalking past on the ground with weapons in hand.

"Fuck me," you hissed, backing away to face Joel. "There's four - "

"We can take 'em."

"We're not riskin' it - not with Ellie! We gotta go, now. C'mon, out the back."

Joel nodded at Ellie to follow you; hoping the raiding party wasn't split in two as you swiftly took off in the opposite direction they appeared to be heading in. Before taking corners, you listened for the intruders before leading Joel and Ellie around - finally making it to the doors and pushing out quietly. Joel took refuge behind the sandbags as you caught the door and shut it gently; only then moving as a unit to the next guard post to observe the territory, horses in sight.

"All right," you whispered, "we're gonna make a beeline - and all I want you to do, darlin', is get on the horse. Okay?"

"Okay."

You nodded, glancing at Joel, "Good?"

"Good."

"Ready?" You asked Ellie.

"Yeah."

You moved first, leading the three swiftly for your horses. Ellie evidently had a problem with taking direction from authority as she only grabbed the reins and held Joel's horse as you both swiftly stored your rifles - but movement caught your eye just as Ellie shouted, "Joel!"

You moved into action before a single thought registered; a final act of truest and purest redemption: sacrifice.

Bullying Joel out of the way, the raider swung the wooden baseball bat into the tree; missing his mark but shattering the handle. You used the man's momentum against him, Joel watching in horror as the man managed to wriggled around before you wrapped the man in a headlock and didn't hesitate to snap his neck. Being a doctor and knowing the body had few perks. The fight was over before it began, throwing the dead body aside with the only thought being Joel and Ellie were safe; turning to face them with a pant.

But Joel's face cracked, eyes drawn low, "Oh, my fuckin' God. Baby..."

"Y/N?" Ellie whispered, holding both horses by the reins in one hand, gun still in the other and pointed at the ready.

"What?" You looked down, suddenly aware of the baseball handle protruding from your gut. "Oh. Huh..." You gingerly wrapped your hand around the base, wincing, and without thinking it through or realizing your adrenaline-fueled actions, yanked the wood free.

Being a doctor didn't make you a God - you were still human. And humans made mistakes. This one just happened to be your worst one to date... And your last.

"No!" Joel yelped, lunged forward as if to stop you, but it was too late. He caught your stagger into his side, "No, no, you should've left it, baby, fuck! No, it-it was like a plug - not supposed to pull it out."

"Shit," you chuckled, holding the bloody wound with him; dropping the handle to the dead grass. "I-I didn't think, I'm sorry..."

Ajax whinnied in warning. "Joel! Get her on the horse!" Ellie demanded, eyes over their shoulders at the approaching raiders. She mounted herself, crying in panic, "Now! Get her up! Joel!"

"C'mon, baby, we gotta go," Joel worried, lifting you to Ajax with a scream of pain ripping from your lungs. "I know, I know, just gotta hang tight, all right? Just hang on - "

"Joel! C'mon! Get on the horse! Let's go!" Ellie offered her hand, Ajax already whinnying and rearing his head as if he knew how to protect you by getting away from the rushing threat.

"Hang on, baby, just hang on for me!" Joel panted, reaching to jump on behind Ellie as you whimpered and encouraged Ajax forward.

"Go!" Ellie yelped after him, holding the reins to let Joel reach out and push you upright to prevent you from toppling over the galloping horse's shoulder. "Get back!" She shouted at the raiders, firing her gun wildly at the enemies taking cover.

"You motherfuckers!" They heard in the distance, horses galloping off campus and out of the city.

Joel reached out to keep hold of your body as you tried to staunch the bleeding, supporting whatever weight he could as Ellie constantly looked back down the train tracks they walked down. "They're not following us. I think we're safe," she alerted in time to catch sight of Joel leaning out to try to catch you.

"No, no, no, shit, no!" He grimaced when you slid sideways away from him, landing in the snow with a small grunt. "Baby, no, no, no, hey, hey," he dismounted without stopping his horse; leaving that part up Ellie. "No, hey," he dropped to his knees beside you, pulling you in his lap, "hey, baby, no, I'm here, all right? Yo-You gotta stay conscious for me, okay? Hear me? Hey, I got you, I'm right here," he readjusted to press his hand over your wound, letting the other cradle you.

"Joel?" You wheezed. "Joel - "

"Yeah, baby, it's me - I'm here. I gotcha."

"Hi, darlin'," you whispered.

"Hey," he sniffled, slowing down as he heard the finality in your voice, "hey, hi, sugar, yeah, it's me."

"It's cold," you chuckled, coughing lightly to send a splatter of blood over your chin. Ellie bowed her head as tears slowly built as Joel readjusted you so you weren't totally in the snow. "Never really liked the cold, did I?"

"No, no, never did - 's why we never left Texas."

"Right," you breathed with an easy smile. In near-delirium, you asked, "Hey, baby... I-I'm not makin' it outta this one, am I?"

"No, don't fuckin' talk like that - we're gonna get you help. All right? Ellie - Ellie and I, we're gonna get you help, baby, just gotta hang on - "

"Joel," you wheezed, sounding as if all your strength was being channeled into speaking to him, "just listen, would'jah? Got somethin' for yah."

"I don't need nothing but you, baby, c'mon - "

"'Round my neck," you continued, eyes fluttering, "take 'em."

"What?" He sniffled, shaking his head.

"Take 'em, Joel, please, and remember the good we had... The good we did..."

His brows furrowed but gingerly moved the neckline of your coats, discovering a single golden chain. It was one he recognized from you wearing it everyday after your grandmother gifted it to you, and around the loop, two rings. "Oh, God," he chuckled breathlessly, "you kept 'em?"

"'Course I did... Always knew you'd find your way back t'me," your smile was hazy, eyes unseeing. "Take 'em, please."

"Nah, nah, baby, here, lookit," he sniffled, unlatching the necklace to drop the wedding bands in his hand with a chink. "These ain't never comin' off again, hear me? It's you and me, baby, how it's always supposed to be - in life and death, right? That's what we said, till death do us part. Here, here, I gotcha," he slid the diamond ring back on your bloody wedding finger, shoving his own on and holding it up. "See that? Hey? You see it, baby? They're back on, all right? Where they belong a-and won't ever come off again, 'cause we're not finished." He wrapped you in his arms, hand back over the wound with yours over his, "You hear me? We're not over yet, darlin', so, please, just hold on a little longer. I know you can - please, you have to. All right? You're so strong, baby, just hang on, please. Okay? I just found you again, you can't leave me - I need you, Y/N. I need you. Don't do this, please, please, please," he chanted, the sobs wracking his lungs to chop the words messily. Behind him, Ellie sniffled. "It's supposed to be you and me, doll, remember? So, please, don't do this, I need you. I need you - "

"I'm always with you," you managed to whisper. "But you gotta be there for yourself now, Joel... And Ellie, she needs yah, too."

"What about what I need? Huh? What about how I need you?"

"I'm right here..."

"Shit," Joel glared at his bloody hand. "All right, hey, there's a town - right? There's a town not far, baby, it's just up ahead, you just hang on until we get there." But when he tried to move you, the whimper of pain made him stop, rambling on, "We're almost there, okay? You're doin' so well, baby, but just hang on a little longer. An-And we'll find supplies, we'll get you help, honey, all right? Sound good?"

"Yeah, sounds nice," you slurred. "Hey, Joel?"

"I'm here. You gotta hang on for me, please, okay? Y/N, you fuckin' hang on - I can fix this. All right? I can fix all of this, but you gotta be strong for me - you gotta let me fix this, Y/N, please. I gotta get you safe, but then it'll be all better, okay?"

"Joel," Ellie whispered sadly, knowing they weren't moving anytime soon.

"No, no, no," Joel chanted, pulling you closer as your eyes cracked open to gaze up at him. "Hey, hey, pretty girl, hey, it's me. Please... I need you. I can't fuckin' do this without you."

You smiled that pretty smile, blood lining the impeccably white teeth. "Thank you... For comin' back. For findin' me. I love you so Goddamn much, hate w-we had m-more time apart than we d-did t-t'gether."

Joel whimpered, the tears flooding his cheeks as his chest finally caved in. "I'd find you anywhere, pretty girl, in every lifetime. And I never stopped loving you, you know that? Not a day, not a single minute; it's always you, it'll always be you, you gotta know that. C'mon, baby, just stay with me, all right? We're-We're not supposed to end like this. We got fucking years to make up for, like you said! And we have so much left to do - I just found you again. Please, hang on f'me - "

"I don't think we get anymore do-overs, baby," you smiled still. "But that's okay... It's all gonna be okay, I promise. You're gonna be okay, Joel, because you're the strongest person I know. You got a family waitin' for yah in Jackson, 'member?"

"You're part of that family, Y/N!"

"Not anymore," you sniffled, the tears flowing as the adrenaline drained from your system. "And that's okay, Joel. You're gonna have a new chapter in life... And that's so excitin'."

"You're supposed to be in every chapter," he sobbed, shaking his head. "I need you, baby, please, fucking please!"

"You know what's not fair? How handsome you are - even when you cry," you choked, hand over his tightening. "It's okay, Joel... It's okay to lemme go, you're gonna be all right. I promise, my love, you're okay... It's all gonna be okay..."

Joel's heart stammered as you grew weaker, realizing in your last moments of need, you were still comforting him. He knew that was unfair, that you needed him. So he cleared his throat, found his strength, and nodded, "Yeah, all right, sugar, yeah. You're always right, aren't yah? It's all gonna be okay... You're gonna be okay, just like you say."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, baby, yeah, I-I-I can fix this. Hear me? I'll fix this, you just - you just relax. It's okay... You don't have to be strong anymore, I've got you. I'll be strong for the both of us, and we're all gonna be okay. Got that? You and me, baby, we're gonna be okay. All right?"

"You promise?"

"Of course," he leaned in to peck your forehead. "I'm gonna fix this - like I fixed the roof that time? Remember?" He saw the faint smile and continued, "I swear it, pretty mamas, you're gonna be okay, I'll fix this, don't you worry."

"Oh," you breathed with another pretty smile that would haunt Joel for his numbered days. "Haven't heard that name in ages. Always loved it... When you called me that..."

"Yeah? Remember your first Mother's Day? When Sarah first called you that?"

"I was in that yellow sundress... W-We went t'the park... Had a picnic, just us three..."

"You were so Goddamn beautiful in that dress - still are, you still are, my pretty mama," he grinned, nodding. "And Sarah - Sarah was just in awe, called you that - called you pretty mama all day. Told everyone we saw that her mama was the prettiest, didn't she? That she had the best mama around," he sobbed gently. "Made everyone say 'happy Mother's Day' to you, remember that?"

"She was such a good girl," you remembered, "so sweet, so pure - I don't know how she came from us."

"She was raised with so much love," Joel sniffled, leaning down to press his lips to your forehead. "And she was so smart, and-and always right, just like you - y'all ran circles around me, huh?"

"You kept up..." You coughed, whimpering in pain.

"You're all right, baby, I gotcha. It's okay... Y-You can rest now, I'm right here. I have you, ain't never lettin' go. I'm gonna fix all this, but it's okay if you wanna rest... You've redeemed yourself, mamas, hear me? Hey... Y/N, you hear me?"

"I hear you," you slurred, the smile still there.

"You redeemed yourself. You're good, pretty girl, you're so good. You did so good."

"Joel - it-It hurts," you grimaced, whimpering brokenly as the hysteria set in. "It hurts and I-I'm scared, I'm scared, Joel, please, please, please, don't let me go - I don't wanna go. I love you, I love you, please, I don't wanna be alone, Joel, please, I-I don't wanna leave you, I don't wanna be without you, I love you too much, I can't go alone, I don't wanna go - "

"I know, honey, I know, just breathe, you're safe, I've got you. This won't for much longer, okay? I promise, I'm gonna fix it, okay? But you, you just relax. It'll be over soon, I swear, pretty girl. You're okay, baby... And, just think, you're not gonna be alone 'cause you're gonna see Sarah a-and Delilah again. Okay? You're gonna see our girls. That's what you're gonna go do, it's okay - "

"No, no, not with you. We should all be together, please."

"That's all right, mamas, I won't be joinin' y'all just yet, but you go ahead without me. It's okay. I know it's not what we wanted, it's not what we planned, but I'm here with you now and it's okay to let go, baby. You... You don't gotta be strong for us anymore, I'm here, I'll handle this, all right? I'll fix this. I've gotcha... You're okay," he whimpered against your forehead, pressing repeated kisses as if to distract himself from the way your life teetered on the edge. "I love you so much, Y/N. Hear me? Baby, please, I need you to know how much I love you."

"Mh," you hummed, coughing out as breath came harder, "no more... Than I love you..."

"All right, yeah, it's a tie, always been a tie," he chuckled, caressing your cheek as he began to rock. "I love you, you've done so good, baby, I'm so proud of you. I'm so fucking proud of you, my strong girl, my pretty girl," he whispered, leaving another kiss to your lips, "you did so good. You're okay now, baby, you redeemed yourself an-and you're gonna be all right. Hey, just do me a favor? You listenin'?"

"Hm?"

"Tell our girls I love 'em when you see 'em, all right? Can you do that for me? Tell our girls I love and miss 'em, yeah?"

"Mhm."

"Good, good girl, all right, you're okay. I got you, I'm right here... I'm so sorry, Y/N, I'm so sorry, I should've been faster, I should've been payin' attention - " He paused when your head lulled towards his chest, seeking warmth; so he readjusted and brought you in closer; sobbing with his forehead on yours. "Oh, my sweet girl, I'm so sorry, it-it shouldn't've been you, but you're all right - " Joel was forced to pull back when the elevated position he had set you into exasperated the wound that punctured your lung. He watched helplessly as you choked on blood, eyes widening in panic; clawing at him for reprieve, as if you knew he could relieve the pain. The blood in the snow grew darker in a larger, ever widening shape and Ellie's tears froze to her cheeks. "No, no, no, hey, hey, you're okay - you're okay, baby, no, hey - " But the convulsions that wracked your form began to lessen and lessen, eyes dimming of life, and Joel knew this was it. "I love you so much, I love you - you're okay, baby, you're gonna be okay. Ju-Just try to breathe f'me, you're doing so good, I'm so proud of you. Don't have to be brave anymore, 's almost done, I got you - I love you... I love you, mamas, so much, you did so good, I'm so proud, my beautiful girl, I love you so much, Y/N, please - I'm so sorry..." He whimpered as the movements slowly stopped to leave you petrified in his arms.

Just like Sarah.

Understanding you were no longer with him, Joel felt his panic peak; giving a gentle jostle to your form, "Baby?" When there was no response, only your absent, far-off stare, Joel begged, "Baby, hey? No, no, no, Y/N, please... Please, please, wake up! Fuck, don't do this - don't leave me, don't leave us! Fuck! What am I gonna tell Tommy, Y/N, huh? Y-You promised him... Please... Wake up," he whimpered, sobbing as he pulled you into a frozen hold; crying loudly into your neck. "I need you, please! Y/N! Come back, don't do this! I-I can't do this without you, doll, please, just - come back! It's not supposed to end this way, I-I just found you again! Please! Wake up! This is my fault - I shouldn't've - fuck! Don't leave me, not like this! Please, not like this, baby, I need you. Come back, come back, come back..."

Ellie turned away at the harrowing pleas and sobs, her stomach churning with emotion as Joel mourned his wife.

It took the better part of two hours, Ellie sitting on the track as Joel came to terms with the dead body in his arms. If anyone thought he was dead inside before, they didn't understand the meaning until now; where Joel carefully pulled her away from his form with a stream of tears Ellie feared would never end. He slowly set his wife down and backed up a foot; just trying to breathe, keeping a hand on her at all times. Slowly, Ellie stood and neared Joel's side; taking a ginger seat beside him and offering, "I-I'm so sorry - "

Ellie let out an 'oof' when Joel yanked her into his embrace, a fresh wave of tears starting when she instantly wrapped him in a hug. She inhaled shakily and clung to his warmth; the pair counting their blessings they were still alive... But at what cost? "It's like you said, Joel," Ellie whispered, "she's redeemed herself. She's safe, she's okay, she'll be waitin' for you... But we still gotta go, right?"

"We can't leave her here," Joel sniffled, pulling back to wipe his face and pinch the bridge of his nose.

"We're not," Ellie decided. "We're gonna get her home, all right? Give her a proper burial... We're not leaving her out here. Not alone." This made Joel dissolve into another fit, Ellie silently laying her hand on his shoulder in support. "Why don't we move her into town - that way, you can stay with her, where she's safe, and I'll look around for anything we can use to build, like, a sled or something?"

"N-Not alone, you shouldn't be alone. Those raiders are still out there - "

"I'd be worried, if I were them," Ellie snarled, "runnin' into me. After what they did to her... They'd wish they had more back up."

"Right," Joel sniffled, wiping his tears. "I-I didn't protect her - she pushed me out the way."

"She sacrificed herself for you - for us," Ellie nodded, repeating what she heard Tess say once upon a time, "but we can't let her die in vain, Joel. We gotta keep moving."

"Salt Lake City?"

"Salt Lake City," she confirmed; not knowing the repercussions Y/N's death would eventually have. It'd make Joel overly protective and slightly selfish - and eventually, when they got to the Fireflies, her death would make Joel so raw that he'd unflinchingly kill nearly an entire hospital of people to keep his Ellie safe. Being that she was all he had now.

But before that, while searching for material to tote Y/N back to Jackson, the raiders would find Ellie first and snatch her back to their camp. Joel, still mourning, wouldn't come to realize the girl was missing until members of the cannibalistic clan would come searching for him; a mistake none of them would come to contemplate. Fresh off of losing his beloved wife and fearful about losing his adopted child - his third daughter - his found family - Joel would naturally resort to his behaviors and tactics before Y/N began her redemption arc. His emotions were shut off, forced to leave his wife in a stranger's room, in a stranger's house, in an abandoned town, in the middle of nowhere under the loyal watch of her horse; and torture the answers out of the unfortunate raiders he chose to interrogate. There was no coming back after loss like that, and Joel was willing and able to do everything in his power to keep the one single semblance of normalcy he now knew: Ellie.

The pair would slaughter her kidnappers and escape the fiery inferno, but neither were sure how to find their way back to town; needing to move ahead towards Salt Lake City without Y/N. By the time they returned, Ellie in a hospital gown and in a stolen vehicle, Joel's blood-stained hands would wrap his wife's frozen body in a sheet and carefully load her to the truck before releasing Ajax - who had miraculously kept himself alive. Trusting the beast to find his way home, Joel began the journey back to Jackson to his brother and another empty house with a multi-colored stain-glass butterfly hung in a newly vacant bedroom window. A gift in remembrance of their lost daughters that never got the chance to be fully appreciated. When the car ran out of gas, Joel carried his wife's body, carried the golden chain the kid had latched around his neck with her wedding ring strung, and carried the weight of his sins he prayed saving Ellie could redeemed.

[ pt. 1: read here ]

[ part one: Not So Heavenly Surprise: read here ]

requesting rules and masterlist

TLOU masterlist

[hisfavegirl]

Hey girl, I love your HOTD reactions sm! What about like how they would react if you did a VS or Skims collab for a Valentine’s day set or something??

HOTD Characters Reaction To Your Campaign With Skims

Aegon was in the middle of scrolling through his phone, lazily lounging on the couch when his screen suddenly froze.

The SKIMS Valentine’s Day campaign.

Your face. Your body. Draped in lingerie so sheer it might as well be a second skin. Red silk, lace, curves accentuated perfectly—a vision of absolute sin. The shot that made his blood boil the most?

You, on a plush pink bed, biting your lip, fingers tangled in your hair—wearing nothing but a dangerously tiny bra and lace garters. The caption?

“Indulge yourself this Valentine’s Day. ❤️ #SKIMSLove”

The likes and comments were flooding in, men thirsting over you in real-time:

“THIS is what I want for Valentine’s Day.”

“Bro, she’s actually unreal.”

“Forget flowers, I’m sending divorce papers to my wife.”

“I just know her man is LOSING HIS MIND.”

Yeah. He was.

Aegon shot up, phone clenched so hard his knuckles turned white. His jaw? Tight. His eyes? Dark. His entire body radiated possessiveness, his breath coming out in ragged bursts.

His first instinct? Call you. Right. Now. But then he thought—No. No, you fucking knew what you were doing. Posting this without telling him? Letting the entire world drool over you while he was just supposed to sit there and take it?

His next move? Damage control.

The internet absolutely lost its mind.

The moment Aegon dropped the video on his Instagram story, everything went insane.

The clip was short but devastating—you, bent over his bed, skin flushed, your bare back marked with his claim, trembling, moaning his name like a prayer, wrecked beyond comprehension. Aegon’s hand came into view, gripping your waist, his voice low and smug, whispering,

“Didn’t think I’d let that SKIMS stunt slide, did you, baby?”

The internet? BROKE.

Twitter/X Exploded:

“THIS MAN JUST ENDED THE ENTIRE MALE POPULATION WTF”

“Aegon Targaryen is the pettiest, most unhinged man alive and I respect it.”

“She posted SKIMS, he posted HER. This is WAR.”

“HOW is this allowed on Instagram? WHO reported it? WHOEVER YOU ARE, WE FIGHT AT DAWN.”

“Bro turned Valentine’s Day into a public execution.”

Instagram Comments on His Last Post:

“Sir. Some of us are SINGLE.”

“That’s it. I’m deleting my boyfriend.”

“Y’all seeing her LEGS SHAKING??? Nah this man is different.”

“I’m not okay. I will never be okay.”

“We were thirsting over her SKIMS shoot and Aegon said ‘bet.’”

TikTok Reactions:

POV edits of Aegon with captions like “When your man reminds the world who you belong to 😵‍💫🔥”

Audio clips of “I want what they have” over slow-mo replays of the video

Girls fake crying into the camera with captions like “Me realizing I’ll never be this girl”

Reddit Threads:

r/popculturegossip

“Aegon Targaryen just HARD LAUNCHED his revenge arc, and I’ve never felt so single.”

“This is the most unhinged flex of all time, and I need therapy.”

“So we all agree he’s the pettiest man alive, right?"

Instagram eventually took the video down—but it was too late. Screenshots, edits, and memes had already flooded the internet. Aegon had won the war, and the internet was never recovering.

The second Aemond saw the photos—you, draped in delicate lace, barely covered, staring into the camera with that knowing, sultry look—his jaw clenched so tight it could snap.

His phone nearly cracked in his grip as he scrolled through the thousands of comments under the post:

“Mother is mothering.”

“Aemond is officially the luckiest man alive.”

“The male species has been defeated. We are but peasants.”

“You’re telling me this woman goes home to HIM??? Jail.”

A deep, dark chuckle left his lips—but it wasn’t amusement. It was pure, seething possession.

His eye twitched, his breathing heavy as he saw the likes flooding in—from men. From verified blue checks. From random nobodies who had no business looking at you like that.

“The fuck is this, darling?” His voice was deadly calm, but the way he stalked toward you, phone in hand, told you everything.

“A campaign.” You blinked at him, innocent. “For SKIMS.”

“A fucking campaign?” He scoffed, throwing his phone onto the table as he cornered you. “So that’s what we’re doing now? Letting every goddamn man on the internet see what’s MINE?”

He was pissed. Jealous. Possessive. His fingers traced up your arm, then gripped your jaw, tilting your face up to him.

“Tell me, did you enjoy it?” His voice dropped lower, dangerously soft. “Did you like having them all drooling over you?”

His eye burned into you, jaw tight as he leaned in, lips brushing your ear.

“Because now you’re going to remind them who you belong to.”

Aemond never lost control—but tonight? You were in for it.

The second Aemond posted the video, the internet broke.

It wasn’t just a thirst trap. It was a declaration. A warning. A final nail in the coffin for every man who thought they had a chance.

The clip was grainy, filmed through the dim light of his bedroom—his signature aesthetic. You were wrecked on his bed, wrists bound, body shaking, barely able to form a word except his name—moaned like a prayer, like a confession.

And Aemond? His signature smirk could be heard in his voice when he murmured:

“This is what happens when you forget who you belong to.”

Instagram Exploded :

“IS THIS EVEN ALLOWED???”

“So we’re just posting full-course MEALS now????”

“The way she’s literally trembling… yeah, I lost.”

"‘This is what happens when you forget who you belong to’ BRO CAN WE BREATHE???”

“The SKIMS campaign was for US. This? This was for HIM.”

“Aemond said, ‘You wanna model lingerie? Fine. Now model MY BED.’”

“The way she’s just a mess for him… If my man doesn’t love me like this, I DON’T WANT IT.”

Within minutes, Twitter (X) was on fire.

#AemondTargaryen

#SheBelongsToHim

#TiedUpForAemond

#OneEyedKing

Trending. Everywhere.

TWITTER/X MELTDOWN:

“I HAVEN’T EVEN RECOVERED FROM HER SKIMS SHOOT AND NOW THIS????”

“This man really said ‘revenge’ and ENDED US ALL.”

"Aemond Targaryen is a MENACE. I hate him. (I’m lying. I love him.)”

“THIS IS THE MOST POSSESSIVE, FILTHY, UNHINGED, HOTTEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN. HELP ME.”

TIKTOK COMMENTS UNDER THE VIDEO:

Pinned by Aemond Targaryen : “Revenge is sweet, baby."

“My FBI agent just logged out. This is TOO MUCH.”

“This is NOT just a revenge post—THIS IS A WARNING.”

“Imagine posting a SKIMS campaign and your man drops THIS as a response… She WINS.”

“Her Skims photos were for US. Aemond’s revenge was for HIM.”

Meanwhile, Aemond? He just sat back, smirking at his phone as he watched the world come to terms with what they already knew.

You were his. And there was no escaping it.

Jace never had an issue with you modeling. Until now.

He was in a meeting when his phone started blowing up. At first, he ignored it—until Aegon sent him a link with nothing but:

“LMAO. You good, bro?”

Frowning, Jace clicked.

And there you were.

Draped in red lace. Skin glowing. Eyes hooded. Posing in a way that had every man on the planet foaming at the mouth. The SKIMS Valentine’s campaign had dropped, and you were the star.

The moment he saw the lingerie—saw the way your body looked in it—his jaw locked so tight it could crack.

And then he saw the comments.

“I just KNOW Jace is punching the air rn.”

“She’s too fine. If he won’t wife her, I WILL.”

“Jace, be so serious… How does it feel to lose?”

“Why does she look single in these photos???”

“Jace, if you fumble, I’m RIGHT HERE.”

The moment the meeting ended, Jace stormed out of the office, grabbing his phone and calling you immediately.

You picked up, cheerful—which only pissed him off more.

“You having fun?” His voice was low, dangerous.

You giggled. “Jacey, baby, did you see the campaign?”

“Oh, I saw it. So did the rest of the fucking world.”

You hummed, unbothered. “And?”

Jace ran a hand through his curls, breathing hard. He could see the photos in his mind—how every man was lusting over you.

His girl.

And the worst part?

You knew exactly what you were doing.

“And,” he growled, “you better be home when I get there.”

“Why?” you teased, voice all sweetness and sin.

Jace let out a dark chuckle. “So I can remind you who the fuck you belong to.”

One minute, people were thirsting over your SKIMS campaign, and the next?

Jace dropped a bomb.

A video.

A very explicit video.

You, bare, ruined, trembling on his bed. Voice completely gone. Every breath ragged. Body shaking violently. Jace’s hand on your ass, smacking every time you tried to move away. His voice? Dark. Dangerous. Possessive.

“Was it worth it, baby? Hm? Letting the whole world see you like that? Look at you now—can’t even talk, can’t even move. Next time you wanna tease me, remember who the fuck you belong to.”

And his caption? Head Shot.

“Since y’all were so thirsty for her SKIMS campaign, here’s what happened after. Enjoy.”

Instagram Comments :

“JACE, WTF IS THIS? I CAN’T BREATHE.”

“He saw the SKIMS campaign and said ‘bet.’”

“NAH, THIS IS BIBLICAL. HER VOICE? GONE. BODY? FINISHED. JACE?? LAUGHING IN HER EAR?”

“This man took it PERSONAL LMFAO.”

“I ain’t never seen a man HUMBLED this fast 😭”

“THE WAY HE’S WHISPERING TO HER AND HIS HAND?? Y’ALL. I NEED HOLY WATER.”

“Her body shaking and his palm smacking down… Yeah. Yeah. That’s a man.”

“Jace saw the SKIMS campaign and said ‘MY GIRL. MINE.’”

“You just KNOW he was PISSED when he saw those lingerie pics 😭.”

“She went from SKIMS model to Jace’s favorite meal real fast.”

“THE WHOLE VIDEO IS JUST HIM RUINING HER LIFE AND HER LETTING HIM 😭.”

“I need everyone involved in this video ARRESTED.”

“Bro uploaded this like a warning. Like, ‘you thought you were single in those photos? Here’s your reminder.’”

“HE REALLY POSTED THIS AS REVENGE FOR SKIMS. THIS IS A POWER MOVE.”



TWITTER REACTIONS : Trending Topics:

#JaceVelaryon

#JusticeForHerVoice

#SKIMSRevenge

#IsSheAlive??

Comments :

“Jace is actually insane for posting this. HER BODY IS SHAKING. HER VOICE IS GONE. AND HE’S JUST THERE, WHISPERING AND LAUGHING??? HELLO???”

“You KNOW he was mad about SKIMS cause why is this video a whole RESPONSE??? 😭”

“If my man doesn’t ruin me like this after I piss him off, I don’t want him.”

“Jace: ‘You wanna do a lingerie campaign and let men thirst over you? Cool. But they’re gonna watch you break for ME.’”

“Jace really saw those SKIMS pics, picked up his phone, and said: ‘hold my beer.’”

“THAT MAN POSTED A WHOLE MOVIE. AMAZON PRIME COULD NEVER."

TIKTOK REACTIONS: Viral TikTok Caption

“POV: Jace Velaryon took his SKIMS revenge to another level and now we’re all screaming, crying, throwing up.”

Sound: Cardi B screaming “WHAT WAS THE REASON?!”

“Y’all, Jace didn’t just claim his girl. He PLANTED HIS FLAG.”

“Her legs shaking and him laughing about it…? Yeah. I need therapy.”

“Jace’s hand on her ass, the way she arched, the way he smacked down??? I HAVE NEVER KNOWN PEACE.”

FINAL VERDICT:

The internet is absolutely UNWELL. Jace won. You? Finished. The SKIMS campaign? Irrelevant.

The moment Daemon sees the SKIMS campaign, his entire demeanor shifts. He had been lounging in his office, scrolling absentmindedly through his phone—until your face, your body, wrapped in delicate lace, fills his screen. His jaw clenches, his grip on the phone tightening as he watches you pose effortlessly, seductive and stunning, every inch of you made to be worshipped.

And so were the thousands of comments under the post.

“She’s an angel AND a sin. How is that fair?”

“I need her. No, actually, I’ll die without her.”

“Whoever her man is, I hope he knows he lost her to the world today.”

Daemon lets out a dark chuckle, but there’s nothing amused about it. His blood is boiling, his possessiveness clawing at his insides. Lost you to the world? They had no idea who they were talking about.

With a sharp inhale, he slams his phone down on the desk and gets up, pacing the room. His mind races. He knows you love teasing him, knows you like pushing boundaries—but this? This was a direct challenge. A test. And Daemon Targaryen does not lose.

Grabbing his car keys, he heads straight for you. No calls. No texts. You knew what you had done. Now? Now, you’d deal with the consequences.

The internet exploded within minutes of Daemon’s post.

No caption. No explanation. Just you, completely wrecked—your expression dazed, mouth parted as soft whimpers left your lips. His hand cradled your face, slapping your cheek with a teasing, mocking rhythm. And though his other hand wasn’t in frame, the wetness sounds that filled the video left no room for imagination.

Twitter/X:

“WHAT THE HELL DID I JUST WATCH???”

“Daemon just said ‘she’s MINE’ without saying a single damn word.”

“This man saw the SKIMS shoot and said ‘bet’ 😭”

“HELP ME I CAN’T BREATHE WHY IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT THE SOUNDS???”

Instagram Comments:

“Okay but the way she looks at him?? That’s not just lust, that’s ruin.”

“He posted this just to remind everyone he owns her and honestly? It worked.”

“WHO ALLOWED THIS TO BE ON MY FEED??? I have work in the morning.”

“I feel like I just saw something I shouldn’t have… and yet I can’t stop watching.”

TikTok Reactions:

Edits of the SKIMS shoot transitioning to Daemon’s video with captions like:

“She teased him, and he answered.”

“SKIMS said ‘sexy’—Daemon said ‘MINE’.”

Compilation of reactions to the sound alone, with people throwing their phones across the room or covering their faces in shock.

Reddit Threads:

“Daemon Targaryen just changed the internet forever.”

“The SKIMS campaign was a declaration. Daemon’s video? A WAR CRIME.”

“How do we recover from this? WE DON’T.”

While some were losing their minds over the intensity, others were spiraling at the undeniable claim staked in that video. Daemon wanted the world to know—you were his, and no amount of cameras or campaigns would ever change that.

Tag list : @danytar @hangmanscoming @julessworldd @yazzzmints @giirlinblack @searatarg @vaelry @ashblooddragons @callsignwidow

Thank you to @zaldritzosrose for letting me using your dividers ❤️‍🩹

[sukirichi]

[ DUSK ‘TILL DAWN : 011 ]

“we who bear the burden of the crown do not need to love. you only need to stay here, with me, in power, in greed, in lust – in victory.”

cw. 18+.modern royal au. infidelity. angst. reader is confused with her feelings. toxic characters. toxic relationships. smut. unedited. implied dub-con. smoking. getting drunk. physical violence.

notes. @sunasbabie bullied me into updating so here it is. alsoo the start of suna’s downfall arc???

wc. 11.8k

series masterlist 

[ ELEVEN ] I care, I care, I care like perfume that you wear, I linger all the time, watchin’, hidden in plain sight. ooh I try, I try, I try, but it takes over my life. I see you everywhere, the sweetest torture one could bear

Rintaro had known from a very young age he was different.

He had brothers, quite a number of them, and yet even when everyone had their own maids and butlers, Rintaro stuck out like a sore thumb. For one, they were strictly not allowed to call him by his name. He was never Rintaro – always His Highness or Crown Prince. He was never allowed to play with his brothers, either, despite being close in age to most of them. Instead, he stood watching from the windows of his study as they frolicked and lived like normal boys. They attended school, played sports, made friends – the normal way of living, even for Princes. But Rintaro wasn’t like that. Her Majesty had different expectations for him. That because he was the only son of the King and Queen, he simply had to be better than the rest.

No, he had to be the best, and he believed it at some point.

Until Her Majesty announced it was about time he learned some ‘proper socializing’ into society. She’d enrolled him in the same private academy as his brothers, got chauffeured to and fro, and was expected to give nothing but the best of grades when he returned. It sounded simple enough – study, excel, and prepare himself for the throne.

No one had warned him that high school came with other unexpected surprises, one that came in the form of a brown eyed beauty he’d been eyeing since his first day.

Her name was Iris – top of the class, all long, lean legs, and a mop of long, wavy hair. It was hard not to notice her. She was popular, in the way that everyone asked her for her notes, and you could trust her to whisper the correct answer when you’d been called to recite in the middle of the class. An academic overachiever, a teacher’s pet – they all had some sort of name for her. A stickler for the rules, too, always appropriately dressed and speaking in polite, clipped tones. She spoke in a manner elders would love, and Rintaro found that fact rather endearing. He wasn’t a great reader of people, but he could tell one thing: Iris was not her true self.

Her smile might be respectful, but something about the way her lips twitched when being told what to do gave him an idea that perhaps she wasn’t as obedient as she made herself to be. And she was always helping others, putting others before herself, but she never did it looking satisfied.

Rather, it seemed that her actions always stemmed from one thing: obligation.

Iris was not who she is because it was her, down to her nature, but because she felt she had to be. It was such a quality Rintaro resonated with. To deny oneself, and to put duty and order first. They both walked with stiffness in their shoulders, with the weight of the world on their heads. They were simply too young to be caring about such. And Rintaro found it unfair – how they’d been deprived of their right to normalcy and had a future they never even wanted shoved down their throats. He couldn’t speak entirely for her, of course.

They had entirely different backgrounds – with Iris as a foreign scholar, who had to work twice as hard to prove she was worthy as any local, and then there was Rintaro, who couldn’t really tell which parts of him were himself, or fabricated by the throne.

They were both young people who lied to themselves. And strangely enough, he found comfort in that. He found comfort in her. He felt less alone when she was around, and she’d definitely made her presence known. Whether it be slipping notes into his desk and walking away without a word, or sharing her milkbread with him during lunch – which he found hilarious, yet cute – or when she simply made the effort to get to know him.

Not the Crown Prince, but Rintaro.

She began to ask things about himself that he’d never thought of before. Like what his favorite food was – he blanked out, because he wasn’t supposed to be picky with food, so he just ate anything. Or what his favorite game was, and sometimes, she’d even asked him to teach her, even if bringing cell phones in class were prohibited.

She made him feel like a real person. She didn’t treat him specially; she didn’t swoon or fall to her feet when he entered a room. She spoke to him normally, treated him like a friend when no one would dare call him as such.

To her, he was just Rintaro. He could just be. And before he’d realized it, he began to look for her – in the hallways, watching her talk to her friends, or being curious on what snacks she brought so he could buy some for her next time, or intentionally trying to get partnered with her on any project.

But he hadn’t fallen for her.

Not until that day they’d rain poured over them unexpectedly, and they retreated under the nearest tree. Class had long been dismissed, and pretty much everyone had left – save for the two of them due to a late tutoring session. Rintaro struggled with English, but Iris was great at everything. And it was also a good excuse to spend more time together.

“You know, you’re different from what I expected,” Iris spoke, tilting her head up to catch some raindrops falling from the leaves with the tip of her finger. “When they said the Crown Prince was going to attend class, I figured you would be more… uptight. Strict. Or, you know, perhaps more arrogant than your brother.”

Rintaro fought the urge what she thought of him now. He’d become curious about it lately, unhealthily so. He wanted her to like him, to think positively of him – to be more than just ‘handsome’ or ‘charming’ or ‘regal.’ Because he most definitely wasn’t regal around her. He could be more himself, which is why he slouched, learned to smoke, longed for a tattoo, and even learned how to curse. Because he wasn’t Crown Prince Rintaro. He was just a normal high school student, Rin. Rin who stood under a tree while rain poured heavily against the pavement, next to a pretty girl who wore strawberry flavored chapstick and introduced him to a world he never imagined he could be part of.

If she had said he was regal, and well-mannered, he would’ve taken offense. But he didn’t ask, turning his gaze away from the way Iris leaned back against the damp tree and pulled out a cigarette. Even the way she smoked had him fascinated because it meant as a sign of trust to him.

The good, perfect student Iris was no longer perfect around him. She trusted him enough to let her guard down, and reveal her flaws. She had no need to impress him. In return, it made him want to impress her by mimicking her habits – even if he would’ve never dared doing them before.

“I have a lot of arrogant brothers. Which one are you talking about?”

“The ridiculously tall and talkative brunette in our year.”

“Tooru,” he said, gladly accepting when she offered him a stick. He didn’t light it though, because he was on his way home and didn’t want to reek of smoke. Well, if he was to be completely honest, he hated smoking. He didn’t like the way it burned his throat and made it itchy. But Iris smoked often, and she revealed more about herself each time she did, so he joined her. Everything he did was for her.

“Iris, why do you speak so casually to me?”

She shrugged and puffed out a smoky breath. “You just looked lonely. And everyone treats you like you’re fragile – always stumbling over their words or being excessively polite. I can tell it makes you uncomfortable, so… But if you truly mind, I can stick to the formalities. I just thought you might want someone to treat you like a normal person.”

“No, I-I don’t mind,” he reassured, “I like that you speak to me normally.”

“So, friends?”

He chuckled at that, and he didn’t stop her when she took out her lighter and lit her cigarette for him. He supposed one couldn’t hurt. “We have been friends for months now.”

“I know,” she beamed, “I’m just waiting to be invited over to your fancy Palace for tea parties.”

“I don’t even like tea.”

“Shame. I would’ve killed for some expensive drinks.”

And so their unexpected friendship began until they were practically attached to the hip. Wherever Iris went, Rintaro followed. She’d started calling him ‘Rin’ too, and Rin had to hide how much he liked it. He blushed madly each time he did, and it didn’t help that Iris had become more physically comfortable with him – locking arms together when they walked in the hallway, absentmindedly brushing his bangs back during their tutoring sessions, or laying on his lap when she had a book to read as they hid in the corner of the library. Each touch of her skin against his sent heat to his groin. It embarrassed him, because he wasn’t supposed to be thinking about his ‘friend’ like that, but could you blame him? He was a growing teenager. He wasn’t immune to a pretty girl’s subtle touches.

“You know, you can make it less obvious that you’re staring at the scholar.”

Glancing away from Iris playing volleyball with her friends, Rintaro glared at his brother. He shared classes with Tooru, but otherwise barely spoke to him. Tooru was too loud and confident; a little flashy for his liking. He also basked in the attention he received from the girls, shamelessly flirting with them and getting their hopes up.

Rintaro thought he was an ass.

“Shut up.”

“Well, well, can you believe that? I believe the Crown Prince just uttered a vulgar phrase that would surely displease Her Majesty. I wonder if she’ll ground you tonight for being such a naughty Prince.”

Rintaro glared at him, gesturing to Tooru’s childhood friend lurking in the corner. “Don’t you have anything better to do? Like reject that poor girl showering you with gifts again?”

Tooru sighed, and upon seeing Maiko’s face light up when he looked her way, he bid his farewell. “Don’t remind me.”

His brother suddenly disappeared. He almost felt bad for Maiko, the heiress from the Rai Clan. She grew up having multiple play dates with Tooru, and they’d been close all the way to middle school when she grew a crush on him – a crush nearly bordering on obsession. When she invited him over to play with her new puppy around the ninth grade, Tooru was met with a ten feet portrait of him in her bedroom. Tooru hadn’t spoken to her ever since. But the poor girl was too innocent to understand his rejections, and she kept following him like a lost puppy.

Not that Rintaro was concerned. Neither was his brother concerned with him, anyway, so they stayed out of each other’s way until they graduated.

Sometimes, Rintaro still wished he never graduated at all. Maybe Iris wouldn’t have disappeared, then. She didn’t have a phone, so they couldn’t keep in contact, but even if she did have a phone, Rintaro wouldn’t be allowed to be casually conversing with ‘commoners.’ Her Majesty would hate it. And he wasn’t certain where she went. Perhaps university, but last he’d heard, Iris was occupied with dealing with some family matters, and Rintaro stopped prying. Her family was one of the things Iris never spoke of. But from what little he knew, she only had a loving mother who did her very best to raise her alone.

Rintaro would’ve never expected that when they saw each other again, they would run into one another at the Palace, of all places. “Iris?” he couldn’t believe his eyes. Had he missed her so much he was beginning to hallucinate? “I don’t understand. What are you doing here?”

Iris looked like a deer caught in headlights.

He almost couldn’t recognize her. It’d been years since he last saw her and spoke with her, but she seemed entirely different now. She’d gone back to speaking in those forced, clipped tones, her posture perfect, and her smile a little stiff for it to be genuine. She’d been lying again to herself and to the world, but he couldn’t understand why. Rintaro still found it hard to believe that she stood in front of him, draped in lace dresses with the Royal emblem pinned to her right breast in the way royals did.

In the way he did.

“Your Highness,” she said, her tone sweet and airy, as she curtsied. Rintaro felt his stomach twist. This wasn’t the Iris he’d liked for so long. Iris didn’t speak sweetly, or said her words like she treaded on air and had that breathy, ridiculously feminine laugh. Iris’ voice was raspy from constant smoking, and when she spoke, it was always carefree. She never called him by his official title before, so why was she doing it now?

Rintaro couldn’t shake the feeling he was being betrayed.

“You mustn’t have been informed. I’m…”

“Do you serve the crown now?”

“No, no! Not quite in that way,” she smiled, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. It was then he noticed the ring sitting on her finger. “I was married to your brother last night, my Prince.”

“Which brother?”

“Prince Kiyoomi.”

He felt like his world had been crushed.

He was never a hopeless romantic, but he was learning. She’d taught him what girls liked. And he… he thought she liked him, too. She must have, right? If she didn’t, she wouldn’t be staring at his lips when he talked. If she didn’t, she wouldn’t hold his hand and rub circles along his knuckles when they were alone together in the library. Or had he just fooled himself all this time? Was he really nothing but a friend to her?

Rintaro felt foolish all over again.

He felt like he was seven years old once more, holding back his tears while Her Majesty lashed at the backs of his thighs because he wasn’t able to memorize a clause from the Royal Acts and Commands. He heard the word ‘stupid, idiotic, slow,’ and ‘foolish’ resonating at the study room again, while his tutor shook his head in disappointment. Taking a step back, Rintaro released a shuddering breath. He wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt. Surely, she wouldn’t befriend him just to make a fool out of him, but if she did… she would pay. He was the Crown Prince. He would become King. He would punish her, humiliate her and put her in her place if she treated him cruelly – but nothing could have prepared him for Iris stepping forwards, eyes drooping with sultriness as her palms flattened against his chest.

Stepping on her tiptoes, she pressed her lips to his.

“But I wish it had been you.”

When she kissed him for the first time, Rintaro knew one thing for certain – she had ruined him for anyone else.

Rintaro isn’t a man quick to anger, but he was getting there.

To leave him for a trip with another man was one thing, but to completely leave him on radio silence was another. A whole week you’ve been gone and not once had you texted. No calls, no voicemails, not even an e-mail. He felt like he had no wife, and quite frankly, your determination to pretend he didn’t exist was getting on his nerves. What had he done wrong, anyway? Hadn’t he been sweet to you before you left? He wasn’t going to deny he made mistakes, but he was putting effort into making it all better. He hadn’t spoken to Iris when you were around. He ignored her, and avoided her even when you weren’t in the same room. And he fucking hated it – because why did you make him feel like he was a cheater when he loved her first?

And now, you were messing with his head. He was certain you were.

Apart from some photographs the paparazzi took of you shopping with Kanami, or sharing lunch with her or having coffee dates, he hadn’t seen you with Kiyoomi. He hadn’t the smallest clue what you were doing. Were you sleeping well? Better without him, maybe? Did you miss him, too, or were you just glad to finally be away from him?

He was going insane with every passing second you didn’t speak to him.

“You’ve been unusually quiet.”

Iris’ voice flittering through the loud noise of the music snapped him back to the present. Right. He was at a party attended by celebrities and models, with liquor in red cups and suspicious leaves and powder being passed to one another – the type of parties a Crown Prince shouldn’t be seen at. But the twins had insisted, claiming he should enjoy himself and ‘do whatever the fuck he wants’ since he didn’t have a wife around to criticize him. He thought it was stupid. He didn’t want to do anything to upset you, but Iris wanted to come along out of boredom – Kiyoomi was away fulfilling their duties for them as mediator between two countries, so she had nothing better to do. Besides, Rintaro figured Iris had been itching for these environments. She’d played the docile and agreeable Princess role for several years now. She must be tired of it, and as soon as she saw the opportunity to let loose and be her true self, she wouldn’t dare let it pass.

And maybe his brothers were right. There was nothing wrong with just taking some time for himself. If you could do it, why couldn’t he?

However, he couldn’t convince himself he enjoyed this party he was in. People were making out at dark corners of the hall, and he was pretty sure there were illegal activities happening tonight. Iris didn’t bat an eye on it. The twins, too, seemed to be enjoying themselves as they flirted with a model he’d seen before, but couldn’t care enough to remember the name of.

“Sorry,” Rintaro said, “I just have a lot on my mind these days.”

“Is it her? You can’t stop looking at your phone.”

Grimacing, he offered her an apologetic smile. Iris didn’t look jealous, but then again, it was hard to tell under the dim lights, and not when she was hugging her fifth cup of whatever foul-smelling liquor she seemed to indulge in. But neither did he want to offend her by lying, so he slid his phone back into the pocket of his jeans and feigned disinterest. “She hasn’t texted or called since she left. I have no idea how she’s doing at all,” he glanced at her, “Has Kiyoomi texted you?”

“As if that would happen,” she chugged her drink and gestured to the doors. “Let’s go. I need some fresh air.”

They exited and walked all the way to the balcony. On their way there, Iris hugged his bicep and leant against him, causing the passing by hotel staff to eye them warily. But Iris couldn’t care less, and Rintaro leveled the staff with a warning glare. They should know better than to say anything. Tonight, the world was theirs. Iris was in his arms, as free as they could be, as free as he always hoped, and he swore he wasn’t going to think about you.

With the fresh air kissing his exposed skin, Rintaro immediately felt better. He wasn’t surrounded by the stench of alcohol anymore. He could breathe better here. Leaning against the railings, he and Iris overlooked the Kingdom of Inarizaki laying beneath their feet.

At one point in time, he promised to give all of this to the woman beside him. They’d talked about having children and raising them in the Palace. How they would make great monarchs, and they could finally be powerful while still being free. With them on top of the world, no one could tell them what to do. They could simply be themselves. But just a hundred times better, because Iris would be beside him and sharing the burden of the Crown.

At least, until Rintaro realized none of that felt right.

You were his wife. He didn’t want to share this Kingdom with anyone else but you, although there was a more worrisome voice whispering at the back of his head – Rintaro didn’t want to share you with this world. He wanted to hide you and keep you for himself. He didn’t want you anywhere Kiyoomi, or Tooru. You were his. He was yours. He’s your husband, and you his wife.

You should be the one here with him, and he should be there with you.

Did you feel the same way, too?

Iris lit up a cigarette. Before he could think better of it, he snatched one from her and she lit it up for him, just like she did when they were younger. Her brows rose at his sudden eagerness, “You haven’t smoked since you met her.”

“I didn’t want her to think I smelled.”

“What’s the change?” she teased, “No longer worried she’ll think you reek because you’re married?”

“I just need the distraction.”

“Do you miss her?”

“I’m just worried.” He gritted his teeth, not liking how all of this just felt… wrong. Iris smelled too much of the old perfume she wore when they were teenagers, and it made him nostalgic in the worst kind of possible. Like recalling a childhood memory you thought was great at the time, but growing up completely changes your perspective on it. Rintaro hated it – how he tasted bitterness at something he once craved so much. Worse, he couldn’t keep lying to himself. He didn’t know where his heart was at yet, but something was different.

He desperately wanted to see you.

“I feel like… I feel like she’s going to leave me, Iris. Something’s changed.”

“You’ve changed, Rin,” she snapped, throwing her cigarette on the ground and stomping at it. Rintaro frowned; he’d seen her do it before when they were kids, but seeing her still do it now confirmed his theory: Iris still had her mean temper. She could never hide it even under silk dresses and velvet gloves. “You haven’t been the same since the honeymoon. I feel like we left behind the old you, and the one that came back is someone I barely know.”

Rintaro couldn’t deny it even if he wanted to. She was right. He’d changed. He didn’t know why, or how, but maybe he was falling in love. Could he be? No… maybe he just missed you. Maybe he just hated the way you seemed so resigned and distant when you left.

“I’m sorry,” was all he could tell her, because Rintaro was too lost.

“Are you changing your mind about me?”

“No, no. Gods, I would never. I just – I’m confused, okay? She’s mad at me, and she just left. What if she never speaks to me again?”

“She will. She’s your wife.”

“You don’t even speak to your husband,” Rintaro argued, and Iris rolled her eyes. Once, he would’ve found her irritation appealing. But directed at him? He just felt like he was being looked down on.

“That’s different. You know, Rin, if you’ve changed your mind about me, it’s okay. I already knew before this most likely wouldn’t work out, and even if you did become King and legalized divorces, what would happen, then? I’ll be your concubine,” she sneered, as if the mere thought sickened her. “People would reduce me into nothing but a whore. I don’t want to be hated just because I wanted you.”

Rintaro pursed his lips. Sure, the title ‘concubine’ didn’t come with many good meanings. But it was all he could give her. He couldn’t imagine making her his wife. Iris had too much of a temper for that, and with all the pretending and acts she puts on, he didn’t trust her enough to treat his people right when she wielded enough power.

She wasn’t kind like you.

She wasn’t like you.

He knew all of this, had realized it just now, yet he couldn’t bring himself to just go back. Running his hands through his hair, he sighed in defeat. “I’ve already gone this far. It’s a little too late to tell me to change my mind, you know?”

“I’m just reminding you this was your choice, not mine. And don’t forget if you do legalize divorces, and Kiyoomi and I did separate, does that mean you’ll divorce her, too?”

He threw his hands up in the air, frustrated. “Why are you asking me this?”

“Because I’m not a whore, Rin. I’ve changed my mind. I no longer want to be just your sidepiece, your secret lover. I have been here with you before people even acknowledged your existence. I was here first. Don’t you think it’s unfair she gets to have you in all your glory and I can only have you in secret? Like what we feel for each other is something to be ashamed of,” tears pricked at her eyes, and Iris angrily wiped them away. Rintaro was frozen to his spot. He didn’t even feel like reaching to wipe them for her – his mind was just in a different place entirely. His exhaustion ran bone deep.

“If you want me to divorce Kiyoomi when you become King, you should divorce her too.”

“That wasn’t the plan. You said you were fine being a concubine–”

“It’s either me or her, Rin. Choose. Who will be your wife? Me or her?”

“You. It’s always going to be you.”

“Do you promise?”

“It’s just you!” he barked, surprising both himself and Iris. He’d never raised his tone with her before, yet there was no denying it – he was changing. Iris knew this, too, and Rintaro could tell by the wicked glint in her eye that she would use this against him.

Rintaro didn’t think twice before he slammed his lips to hers.

If she couldn’t be convinced with words, he would convince her with their bodies. It was how they communicated anyway – all arguments would always be resolved in the bedroom. They stumbled together back to his hotel room, lips only leaving one another’s for a brief moment to breathe, before they were clawing at each other’s clothes. She let out her rage on him by pushing him back to the bed, with her on top and ripping his shirt, uncaring of the remnants. When she kissed him, it was everything but sweet. He tasted nothing but hatred and pure anger as she shoved her tongue down his throat, and he choked, tightening his grip on her hips while she bounced.

They did not make love.

They simply shared their bodies for a lack of better things to say. He bruised her and fucked her hard enough the headboard slammed against the wall because he couldn’t say he missed you. She marked his skin with hickeys and claw marks down his back because she didn’t want to hear him say he missed you.

At talking, Rintaro and Iris lacked at.

But they spoke well enough with the violence of their bodies that by the end of the night, they both knew – Rintaro’s heart was no longer in the same room as them.

You took it with you from a thousand miles away.

Rintaro couldn’t sleep the entire night. Iris had passed out as soon as she’d satisfied herself, and after hogging the sheets all to herself, he’d given up on trying to sleep. It felt wrong to share the same bed with her, anyway. So he got up, showered, and scrolled on the latest news to look for you again. Still nothing – but apparently Itachiyama’s citizens were looking forward to you and Kiyoomi attending a movie’s premiere night.

He clutched his phone hard enough it shut off. Sighing, he leaned back against his seat on the couch, an arm draped around his arm. He’d gone past the borders of being pathetic. Now, he was just eager to see his wife again, but he had no way of communicating with you. So like the pathetic fool he was, he couldn’t stop himself from scrolling for hours when a rapid knocking banged down on his door. Frowning, he opened it, and was met with a shirtless Atsumu wrapped in nothing but a towel – his eyes bloodshot red, though he suspected, not from crying.

“‘Tsumu, what the fuck?” His brother reeked of alcohol and sex. Pinching his nose, he scanned the hallway for witnesses before opening his door wider. Atsumu scurried in without a word and plopped down on the seat, his knees bouncing repeatedly. “What’s wrong with you?”

“I… I fucked up.”

“Yeah? What’s new about that?”

“No, I mean, I really fucked up,” he groaned, his head falling to his hands. Rintaro immediately felt bad about him, Walking forwards, he crossed his arm against his chest, encouraging his brother to continue. “Listen, the party was going great, and Yuki just looked even better in person. And she was fucking funny and so perfect, man.  I couldn’t help myself. But she was flirting with ‘Samu more and I got jealous so–”

“What did you do?”

Atsumu’s Adam’s apple bounced as he swallowed. He couldn’t look Rintaro in the eye, and the latter was growing more nervous by the second. “I may have made her drink more than she can handle… and pretended to be Osamu. So she’d sleep with me.”

“You are screwed.”

“I know, I know, but she’s going to wake up soon, and I don’t know what to do. I left the room, and–”

“Okay, calm down. Where’s ‘Samu?”

“Downstairs, eating breakfast.”

“You stay right here.”

Iris chose the wrong time to wake up. She must’ve heard Atsumu’s frantic ramblings and sat up from the bed, clutching the blanket to her naked chest. Upon seeing an equally nude Atsumu, she screeched, throwing the nearest pillow at him. “‘Tsumu, get out!” Atsumu fought back by throwing a smaller pillow her way. They began bickering like small children, and it was too early for any of this. He could feel a pounding at the back of his head already.

Tired. He was just tired.

“Iris, please, just – just stay here, the both of you, okay? I’ll be back.”

At least Rintaro had Atsumu’s mess to thank. He finally had a good enough excuse to not spend another moment in that suffocating room with her – or any of them. He’d wanted to leave hours before, but Iris wouldn’t have taken it well if she woke up without him. For now, though, Rintaro had to take on the role of a responsible older brother; something he’d never done before. Taking quick strides, he swung the door open when Atsumu called out for him.

“Wait. Rin!” Rintaro paused, raising a brow at his brother, whose face had been drained of color. “I’m sorry… I just… I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t worry. We’ll fix this.”

Rintaro himself wasn’t convinced by his words. Sure, it wasn’t unheard of before that the Princes got their sexual needs satisfied without having been married. Save for a few like Wakatoshi, Keiji, Kita, and Tobio who all wanted to wait for marriage, he was a hundred percent certain his brothers had been with women before. This normally wasn’t a cause for concern. But Hiroda Yuki wasn’t just anyone. She was a model currently rising to fame, and not only was she inebriated during the act, but she’d been led to believe the man she took to bed with someone else. If she were to found out the truth, and decided to turn to the media to ruin his brothers, it’d be another issue for the throne. It didn’t affect Rintaro directly, but times were changing – people were growing restless the longer the crown sat without its King.

It was high time they chose a King, but a very few number of Princes hardly seemed eligible.

As much as he hated to admit it, he knew Ushijima was the best choice to be King. He was fair, disciplined, and followed the rules to a tee. He also had a happy, stable marriage with a respectable noble woman, and they already have a healthy son. There weren’t any arguments that Rintaro paled in comparison to him.

But that didn’t mean he would give up so easily.

He wanted the throne. He wanted everything.

Shaking those thoughts out of his head, he headed for the lobby in search of the darker haired twin. He’d think about the Crown another time. Ducking his head to hide his face, he nodded at any passing staff and hid behind corners. It was only a matter of time before Yuki woke up. That presented another problem – should they hide the truth from her and keep Atsumu safe, or tell her what had really happened and risk having Atsumu be kicked out of the Palace?

Fuck. Rintaro didn’t know what to do, but maybe Osamu would.

His brother sat at the hotel’s dining area, happily digging into his meal without a care in the world. Oh, how lucky he was to be so ignorant. Out of the twins, Osamu was the more mild-mannered one and got into less trouble, but it didn’t change the fact Osamu was often the instigator, and Atsumu the willing victim who played into his hands. The situation felt more complicated now because Rintaro was unsure. Had Osamu planned this all along? Had he known that Atsumu wanted to sleep with Yuki and left them to themselves just when the both were drunk out of their asses?

Too many questions, and he struggled to form a coherent thought. But if he were Kita, he’d have this resolved within a second.

If he were Kita, but he wasn’t. He was just plain Rintaro, who wasn’t particularly great at anything, yet had unfortunately been branded with an extravagant title he never deserved.

Pulling out a seat before him, he narrowed his eyes at his brother. It was still early in the morning, so they had enough privacy with only very few people having breakfast. No one paid them any attention as Rintaro leaned forward, his voice low and hushed.

“Where were you last night?”

“Good morning to you, too, dear brother,” quipped Osamu through a mouthful of waffles, “Lovely set of breakfast they serve here. You should try some.”

“‘Samu, I’m serious. Did you stay at the party last night?”

Osamu, the little ass, took his sweet time chewing and swallowing before he spoke. “No, I went home after ‘Tsumu went out with the model. I just came back to pick him up. I figured he’d be too drunk to drive home.”

Rintaro wanted to ask for more details. There had to be more to the story. The twins were both cunning when they wanted to be, although he doubted Osamu would do anything to intentionally harm his twin. It seemed possible, but he couldn’t be too careful. None of them could afford any defamation lest the people decided for themselves how uncontrollable and unruly the Princes are. Their father had already broken the people’s trust by having multiple sons with different women. They treaded on eggshells, even more so when Rintaro opened his mouth to speak, and was cut off by the crowd whispering around them.

He and Osamu froze. They could barely make out the words from their mumbling at this distance, but they were no fools. They could feel the eyes of everyone in the room on them. With their phones pulled out, they whispered amongst themselves and sent looks of disbelief towards the Princes. Rintaro’s heart raced as he made eye contact with his brother.

They both pulled out their phones and checked the latest news.

An article published just a few hours ago trended worldwide at number one. A photograph of Rin and Iris making love could be seen through a window, with the headline implying that they were secretly lovers all along. His heart dropped. He scrolled down to the comments, his fist turning white at the knuckles as he read them.

That’s disgusting! Wasn’t Prince Rintaro recently married? It seems like being a cheater runs in the blood, after all. He’s just like his daddy To think they did this while their spouses were away for official duty… unbelievable. Disappointed, but not surprised. Princess Iris always seemed like a skank. Never liked her. She came to give aid when there was a storm in our village once, and she kept complaining she was tired. Now she’s going around sleeping with other people’s husbands *laughing sticker* lol she sounds like a bitch Is this real?????????? This has to be fake. The Crown Prince loves his wife! Delete this post now! You’re in trouble once the Palace sees this!

Rintaro pocketed his phone. “We need to leave.”

He dragged Osamu by the arm, ignoring his brother’s complaints that he hadn’t eaten his berries yet. One glare shut him up. They had bigger things to worry about than some stupid fucking berries.

“Call Shinsuke. We need help.”

All four of them hid in Rintaro’s room until Kita arrived. It hadn’t been long, maybe less than an hour, but the wait was nerve-wracking. Thankfully, he’d brought a security team with them. The Princes were escorted out through the back doors and into their cars, although it was too late. Reporters and journalists were already swarming outside the hotel. Kita had stayed back to tell the hotel staff they were not allowed to speak of what they saw or heard during last night’s party under no circumstances. The Princes’ safety were their utmost priority. Everything would be dealt with accordingly. Just as they pulled out of the hotel’s parking, Atsumu informed Kita about Yuki, and the situation he left her in.

Shinsuke’s lips thinned. Already, he looked bone tired. Waving a hand, he dismissed his brothers and promised he’d take care of her once she woke up. For now, they had to stay low and keep out of the public’s eye until the situation died down.

“You all best behave when you get back,” Shinsuke warned, “Her Majesty is furious.”

Of that, he had no doubt. Her Majesty had been eerily quiet since everyone’s return from the honeymoon. But Suna knew his mother better than anyone; she wasn’t letting things pass by, she was only watching from the sidelines, waiting to see who would drop the ball first. And to no one’s surprise, it would be Rintaro.

Her Majesty was right. He couldn’t keep this secret affair with Iris forever.

One way or another, the truth would be revealed, and the truth itself would be his damnation.

None of them uttered a word as they sat next to each other in the car. Atsumu’s still bouncing his leg, causing the seat to shake, but Osamu could care less. He simply gazed out the window. Iris, on the other hand, hadn’t stopped crying, her shoulders shaking silently. Mascara ran down her face in streaks, her lipstick smudged and her torn dress doing very little to hide the love marks on her skin. Gods. Rintaro’s headache worsened. If they got out of the car and the paparazzi took even one photo of Iris in her post-sex state, they were done for.

Rintaro could kiss his precious Crown goodbye.

Walking back to the Palace was akin to walking to your own death.

The lobby was torn upside down. Calling it a mess would be an understatement. The Queen stood in the middle of the furniture she’d flipped and thrown, shards of broken glass all around them as she heaved. The pure image of rage – and he had been the cause. “Fools! Idiotic fools, all of you!” she screamed, stomping through the glass as she reached up to fist Iris’ hair.

“Ow, Your Majesty–”

Her Majesty scrunched her nose at the scent of smoke and alcohol coming off from her, further fuelling her anger. “And you! By the Gods, I knew marrying you into this family was a grave mistake, but you just keep making me regret I ever laid eyes on you, don’t you? You lowly, good-for-nothing whore.”

“Mother!”

“You do not get to speak!” she turned to him and harshly let go of Iris, causing her to stumble and fall onto the broken glass. Panicked, Rintaro reached out for her, but the Queen had caught his arm, reared hers back and landed a slap on his cheek. Rintaro was stunned – she’d been harsh and cruel, but she never laid a hand on him. “Do you have any idea what you did? The throne is all in shambles because of you! The Cabinet hasn’t stopped bugging me ever since that article came out, and I have all our lines busy with people demanding for answers! And you dare raise your voice at me? I told you, multiple times, that you need to stop with your trysts. How will you be King now that you’ve lost the people’s trust?”

“He will not become King,” announced a deep voice they knew all too-well. Like a demon that only showed up in your worst nightmares, Ushijima strutted inside the room, an air of authority and finality surrounding him. “I should be the King. Help me have the throne, and I will resolve all of this,” he studied them all – Atsumu with his guilt, Osamu who was too scared of the Queen to move a single muscle, Iris clutching her bloodied arm, and Suna with disappointment written all over his features. “Clearly, he is not fit to lead this country. He is still but a foolish, young man.”

Foolish.

Stupid.

Reckless.

He’s just like his father.

He’d be a failure as King – just. Like. His. Father.

So that was who he was then. A failure. He’d become the one thing he swore not to be. How would you look at him now? You always gazed upon him with stars in your eyes, like he was the best thing to ever happen in your life. No one had ever looked at him that way before – not his mother, not even Iris. In Iris’ eyes, he was simply… a boy. A boy with no knowledge and experience in this world, a boy who she felt she had to teach because he knew so little. Only you looked at him with adoration, and even that had been taken away. Or, no, he ruined it. Just as he was the reason you used to smile, he’d also become your greatest pain. And maybe, once you’d returned him and seen how the entire country and his whole family had hated him, you would see him for who he is too – nothing but a failure.

The good for nothing Prince.

He should have known. The Palace was no place for the likes of him. He should have just stopped trying so hard to be King. He should have never used Iris as an excuse to quell his insecurity. But was it truly a crime to want to feel like he was needed?

He didn’t know anymore. The only thing he knows now was that he needed to leave, and without another word, stepped out of the room.

“Rintaro! Where are you going?!”

He ignored his mother calling for him. Perhaps he should stop calling her that, too. She’d barely been a mother. She was more of a Queen, bending and breaking her back to His Majesty’s will. She loved the crown and the power it gave her more than anything, that she willingly sacrificed her dignity to keep her position. For many nights, Rintaro watched his mother leave their quarters crying, battered and bruised. It was confusing for a young boy like him. Weren’t mommies and daddies supposed to love one another? But the Queen would scold him for being awake past midnight, and rush him back to bed while she limped on her way. She never loved the King, and because he was his son, she never loved him, too.

Rintaro was nothing but another tool for Her Majesty to stay in power.

She could never become King and hold the Kingdom for herself, but he could. Wasn’t that why she kept him locked away for years and groomed him to take in his Father’s steps?

I kind of did, he thought sarcastically, I’m a horrible husband just like him.

When you arrived in Inarizaki, the country was in chaos. People flocked you from left and right when you and Kiyoomi left the plane, causing the older Prince to break his silence and scold the nosy reporters. Flabbergasted at his sudden outburst that seemed out of character; they lowered their cameras and gave you enough breathing space. The peace, however, did not last long. Her Majesty was furious beyond what one can imagine – akin to a dragon breathing fire down to anyone who dared come near her tower. The twins, who apparently started this fire and caused Rintaro to be the fuel, had been shut away in their rooms in fear of angering her. Iris, from what little you heard about her, was being ruthlessly flamed by the media. They’d called her all sorts of unkind things you would’ve never dared say out loud.

But for some reason, seeing their downfall did not give you any satisfaction.

Because at the end of the day, they were the people you and Kiyoomi returned to. You may walk down the same hallways in the Palace, but he would always be in Belleview Manor to look for her. And you were well on your way to search for the Crown Prince who walked out on his mother.

The guards took some time to find his location, but once they did, they did not hesitate in informing you. Everyone believed you were the only person he’d want to speak to right now. So you drove up to the mountains, where it was barren and cold, and you had to use a truck to survive the rocky terrain. Seriously, out of all the places he could be, he chose to wallow in misery at the top of the world – in the pouring rain, no less.

Boots muddied from the storm, you hopped out of your truck and opened an umbrella, clutching your coat tighter as you watched your husband from afar.

This mountain served as a border between Inarizaki and Itachiyama. From where you stood, you could see the two countries – Itachiyama with its rich nature, and Inarizaki with its towering Castles and bustling cities. Once a united nation, now split into two – all because of love. A tragic story, yet a realistic one. It only goes to show how powerful, and dangerous, love could be. You knew better than anyone that whatever made you happiest could also be your greatest demise.

And there was the said demise – crouching as he picked up pebbles and threw it off the mountain wall. He wore the same shirt as from the photograph; wrinkled and stained with lipstick. Even from this distance, you could smell her on him, and you wanted to laugh. Perhaps Kiyoomi was right – maybe they never loved each other. Maybe they were just lonely.

Extending the umbrella until your husband was shielded from the rain, you softened. Rintaro visibly froze when the rain stopped pelting against him. His wet hair stuck to his face, his shirt plastered on his skin.

A myriad of emotions flickered through his devastatingly handsome face: relief, worry, surprise.

You broke the silence first and crouched down next to him. When Rintaro stiffened, you smiled, showing him you were not here to be his enemy. “My Prince. You are a difficult man to find.”

“Princess,” he breathed out, and you realized the poor Prince was shivering. His face broke into that of despair upon seeing you. “I didn’t know you would be home so early.”

“I had some matters to attend to.”

“You saw the article,” he guessed, and you nodded. Rintaro then stood to his full height, and you followed, causing his head to bump into the umbrella since he was taller. For a moment, he crouched to fit in under the small space. But it was uncomfortable, and soon, he was gently taking the umbrella and holding it for the both of you – more for you, though, since rain still trailed down his back. “I’m sorry.”

“It was bound to happen,” shrugging, you gestured for him to take a walk with you. It was far from being the most scenic place to have a peaceful walk in, but it would do.

You two were silent for a moment. Rintaro seemed to have a thousand thoughts running through his head when you finally spoke.

“How are you?”

“Tired. And you?”

“I’ve had better days.”

Rintaro stole a cautious glance. “Are you mad at me?”

You chuckled, and the sound of it stupefied him. His eyes widened as if afraid, but truly, there was no need to be. You weren’t in the mood to argue with him. “Not really. I feel like I was mad at you a long time ago, and now I’m just… Numb to it all, I suppose,” you said, absentmindedly spinning the wedding ring you both wore. Such a simple jewelry, yet it symbolized so much more. When you spoke again, the rain had calmed down a little bit, but the cold had already seeped into both of your bones. “Marriage is difficult. You have to stay true to your vows, even when the times are challenging. In sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, for better or for worse. ‘Till death do us part,” you glanced up at him, taking in those handsome features you fell in love with – his hazel eyes, his soft lips you loved to kiss, and his face you often cradled in your palms. Even right now, you wanted to kiss him, if only to give comfort, but you had to know first –

“Do you intend on keeping your marriage vows, Your Highness?”

He averted his gaze. “I doubt our marriage is valid anymore. The country thinks I am a horrible husband to you.”

“It’s not like I’ve been the best wife myself,” you admitted, your chest aching as you remembered the Second Prince – his gentle smiles directed only at you, the castle ruins, his large palms holding you tenderly, and the crestfallen look on his face when you told him you had to look for your husband. Such a great man, but the timing couldn’t be worse. And Gods, you couldn’t help it. You cried. You mourned the love you could have had.

You grieved for the life you could have had, the person you could’ve become.

If it had been Kiyoomi, it would be so much easier. He would love you in the way you wanted. He would you close to his arms all night long because he wouldn’t want to let go. He would chase away those stupid chickens for you. He would hide you away from the rest of the world and given you a life of solitude and peace – it would’ve been simple, and it would’ve been perfect.

But Kiyoomi was already married, and so were you.

And you felt horrible because he was great, but then you’d become a horrible wife. You would be exactly like Rintaro if you had given into your desire and kissed him. Kiyoomi wasn’t yours. But was Rintaro? Your heart was everywhere and nowhere all at once.

Why couldn’t it all just work out?

Why couldn’t it be him?

Wiping your tears with the back of your hand, you forced the thoughts of the curly-haired prince out of your head. “I wish I hated you, Rintaro. I wish… I wish I never met you. I wish you never danced with me at your brother’s ball. I wish you never courted me. I wish you never came into my life and changed everything. It would have been better to never have been loved, than to have loved and been betrayed.”

Rintaro stepped forward, his arm extending to wipe your tears for you but even he could tell you were refused. So he kept his distance, clutching the umbrella tighter as his voice broke. “I’m sorry. I really am. It just… I didn’t want for it happen. You were all I thought about. When you were gone and you didn’t call or texted once, I thought I was losing you. I wanted you back.”

You shook your head. “You cannot have everything you want. You know that.”

His face dropped.

“Are you going to make me choose, too?”

“No. I already know who you would choose,” and you did, yet your heart still ached for him, for your husband, the one thing you couldn’t have. Only you didn’t feel like laughing, not when Rintaro looked at you with just as much confliction. “Is it foolish of me that I still love you even after everything you’ve done?”

His lips curled the slightest bit. “A little, but I am the last man to judge you if you were foolish, which you aren’t.”

You laughed sardonically. “I love you, do you know that?”

“I know,” he mumbled.

Who knew two words alone could puncture one’s heart so much?

Looking away, you both remained silent until Rintaro dropped the question. “What will happen to us now? Divorce is unlikely, but I might be stripped off my titles. I don’t know. But I have a feeling I certainly won’t become King anymore.”

“Do you want to be?”

Rintaro thought about it. “I do. It’s all I’ve ever known to pursue.”

“Then stand tall, my Prince. A future King doesn’t bow down to anyone, not even his Queen, and most especially not when the world is against him. We can fix this. I can fix this. I can restore your glory, but I need you to place your full trust on me.”

The plan you formed in your head would be considered insane. Her Majesty would certainly be furious, but if this was the only way to leave Rintaro, you would do it. You would protect him. You would give him back his power, and once he’s had it all, you’ll remove yourself from his life. He cannot have everything that he wants – but if you could not have love, then you want power. Even for just a brief moment, you were determined.

You were going to ruin her.

The drive back to the Palace was silent. He’d agreed to whatever plan you had, regardless of what the outcome might be. He didn’t even know what you truly had in mind. He just trusted you wholeheartedly like you asked, and told you to do as you pleased. Right now, the Crown Prince was weak. His mind was far too disturbed to process anything correctly. You would take advantage of it, simply because his compliance would be the only thing to ensure your success.

He just needed to remain silent.

Claiming he was exhausted, Rintaro went ahead first. It’d be another night where you’d sleep separately, and you would both definitely be awake the whole time. Just as you rounded the corner, you saw a hunched figure resting against the wall. He looked like he’d been waiting for you for a while. Upon hearing your footsteps, Kiyoomi raised his head – his dark eyes vulnerable, almost if hoping you would be the same as you were yesterday.

You wanted to. Truly, you did.

But the person he’d been with in Itachiyama was someone else entirely. She was someone happier, someone who didn’t have a broken marriage to worry about. She was someone who could have loved him.

Now, you were the same Princess he’d always known – the one who could never choose him.

Kiyoomi nodded to himself. He must have realized everything by now. What happened in Itachiyama stayed in Itachiyama. Pushing his weight off the wall, he strode to you with a blank expression. His eyes had gone cold again.

“We will never speak again, will we?”

“I’m sorry,” you breathed out, “He needs me right now.”

“I know,” Kiyoomi had never sounded so defeated broke, and it broke your heart. It made you want to run into his arms, to tell him it could’ve been him if you met him first. But that would sound wrong, wouldn’t it? He had been first. He’d been the last dance; the destined lover. The fated one. But man’s willpower could be so strong it battled even destiny itself, and you were both nothing but a fragment of the could’ve been’s.

“Good luck, Princess, in all your endeavors,” and then, just when you thought he would kiss you as he leaned forward, you closed your eyes. Waited with bated breath.

But he never did.

Kiyoomi only kissed your cheek, and then his scent and his warmth disappeared sooner than you would like. When he walked away, you saw all the what if’s you had to let go of.

The dream life with Kiyoomi vanished into thin air.

Wiping the tears from your cheeks, you forced yourself to turn and never look back. Kiyoomi was surely doing the same. He’d come to peace with it eventually, the love he could’ve had, the marriage he should’ve had. Itachiyama was nothing but a fantasy anyway. He wasn’t a real farmer just as you weren’t someone he could call his. It was a story doomed from the beginning.

Numbness spread all throughout your body. You’d been too drained to cry further, too exhausted to regret what you’d just done. The voice in your mind, the one who craved Kiyoomi like man needed air, had been eerily silent, too. It was if she, too, knew there was no point chasing after something that didn’t want to be chased in the first place.

All you could do was close your eyes and push the image of Kiyoomi’s smile out of your head.

He wasn’t yours. He could never be yours.

After what seemed like hours, you finally arrived at your shared quarters. The same room you left your husband in, and quite possibly the same room he slept with his mistress while you were gone.

You sighed. Opening the door, you were met by the sight of Rintaro pouring himself a drink. He’d already changed clothes – ones free of Iris’ lipstick and perfume. He looked fresh, much more composed than when he was a mess hours ago, yet he seemed… distant. Usually, he’d already perk up at you entering the room. But his face was devoid of any emotion as he poured wine into a second glass, deftly picking it up before downing it in one go. Your gaze fixated on the bobbing of his throat. How Iris’ lips kissed the column of his neck, how she’d whispered praises into his skin, how Rintaro allowed it all.

He slammed his empty glass down on the table. Leaning forward, he rested his arms on the sides of it, his voice unnaturally low as he spoke. “You know, I couldn’t stop thinking about it.”

“About what?”

“Why you weren’t mad after reading the article,” his knuckles turned white from when he tightened his grip. He took slow exhales as if to calm himself, his grip loosening before he snatched another glass.

Back straightened, Rintaro towered over you as he took slow, careful, deliberate steps – akin to a predator sneaking up on its prey. Your heart drummed in your chest, loud enough it could’ve echoed in the spacious chamber, but you stood your ground. You wouldn’t let him have the satisfaction of seeing his effect on you. Then, he stood in front of you – close enough you saw the steady rise and fall of his chest, the tipping of his head to the side as he narrowed his gaze at you. Inquisitively, suspiciously, like peeling away the layers of your skin to reveal your dirtiest secrets.

“Strange, don’t you think? Any sane wife who found out their husband was cheating on them would’ve screamed and kicked already. You didn’t do any of that.”

“I told you already. I’m too tired for any of that.”

“It could be that,” he raised his glass to your face, a portentous smirk dancing on his lips. “Or you could also be directing your affections to someone else.”

“What are you trying to say?”

He rolled his eyes, but otherwise kept his gaze on you as he sipped his drink and taking his sweet sweet time. “I wouldn’t have slept with her if you didn’t leave. You know I despise Kiyoomi, yet you still went. You completely disregarded my feelings when I said I didn’t want you to go,” he grounded his teeth, jaw clenching from the effort of holding himself back. “Is it him, then? Are you choosing him over me?”

He sounded so serious in his accusations you almost believed it yourself. “Don’t be absurd, Rintaro.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, did I strike a chord?” he said in a sing-song manner, the smile dropping from his face when you kept your lips shut. “So the rumors were right. You went with him to get back at me.”

Your jaw dropped. Yes, you enjoyed the time with Kiyoomi. Yes, you wished you never left, and you were already regretting each minute you spent longer in this damned space with him. Yes, you thought about Kiyoomi in ways you shouldn’t have – and god forbid you nearly asked him to kiss you, but not once did you think about using his brother as a ploy.

You weren’t like him.

“That’s not true, and you know it.”

Rintaro fumed. He flung his empty glass across the room, the shattering sound muted by his yells. “Prove it to me, then!”

“Are you even hearing yourself? I’m not the one who cheated! Don’t you dare turn this around and make it seem like it was my fault.”

“But it was! If you didn’t go around fucking my brother behind my back, I would’ve stayed loyal to you! I would’ve waited until you returned! What, you thought I wouldn’t know what you were doing there with him? Doing fertility dances, sharing dinners with his mother like you’re his wife, lighting stupid fucking lanterns–” swinging your arm back, your palm connected with his cheek, a resounding slap rendering the Prince speechless. He stepped back, clutching his reddened cheeks as he stared at you in disbelief.

“That is enough. Utter one more word, and I will never speak to you again.”

“You aren’t even denying it,” he spat out, “Have you fallen for him?”

You were done. So done. You wouldn’t have any of this anymore. Sidestepping him, you walked past and away from your husband, heading for your bedroom where you planned on slamming the door in his face. You’d cry for hours there if you needed to – anything to have him leave you alone. But your husband was just as stubborn as he was determined, catching up to you with ease before catching your wrist. He spun you to face him, and you froze – he reeked of alcohol, his lips and cheeks painfully red, but his eyes.

You couldn’t tell if he wanted to kill you or keep you.

“Answer me!”

You fought against his grasp. He was stronger than you by all means; you struggled and kicked and pounded your fists on his chest, but Rintaro didn’t budge. He let you hit him however you pleased, demanding repeatedly to tell him he was wrong – how you wouldn’t choose his brother over him, how it’d be him – forever and always.

“I hate you!” you bellowed at his face, falling limp in his arms from all your fighting. “I wish I never married you – it should’ve been him! I should’ve married your brother!”

“That’s a lie!”

“Oh, don’t look so hurt now, Prince. You don’t even feel a sliver of what I do. Need I remind you that you constantly choose her over me, your wife? Why should I be loyal to you when you’re not even mine?”

“I am yours.”

“You’re hers, too,” you reminded him, your eyes glinting with mischief as you recalled Kiyoomi’s words. Just then, cruel laughter bubbled from your lips. Two could play this game, and you would be the winner. He wanted to hurt you? Fine. You could hurt him even more. “You know what’s laughable, Rin? The woman you’re fighting tooth and nail for doesn’t even want you.”

“Shut up!”

You laughed harder, practically shaking in his arms as you did. Taunting him, you nudged your nose with his, forcing him to look at you and feed on your wrath. “I’m right, aren’t I? She doesn’t like you. She’s merely using you for fame and pleasure because her husband isn’t attracted to her–” the breath was slammed out your throat. In mere seconds, Rintaro had shoved you against the wall, his lips crashing down on yours with such ferocity it burned you. Your eyes stung from your tears, the back of your skull beginning to throb. But Rintaro wasn’t done with you yet.

Pinning your wrists above your head, you gasped, and he took the opportunity to slide his tongue into your mouth. He tasted like scotch and smelled faintly of her perfume. It made your stomach churn, and soon, you were groaning into his mouth, desperately trying to win in this battle of dominance. He was angry as you were frustrated, your lips molding against each other’s like swords clashing in a battle. He struck first, his kisses passionately bitter, but his taste addictingly sweet. You fought back against his hold, your breasts sliding down across his chest and you moaned – he groaned – tugging your bottom lip between his teeth until you couldn’t tell who the enemy was anymore. You shouldn’t kiss him, you shouldn’t enjoy it, but his lips were as familiar as a sunny day and you were a woman in need of light in your life.

He’s repulsive, your mind argued.

But he’s mine, your heart decided. He was, and always will be, yours. He could have Iris for as long as he wanted, but it was you who’d taken his name. It was your ring on his finger, your face next to him in the royal portraits. You weren’t the shameful mistress – you were the rightful wife. You could have him as you pleased, ruin him to your delight. Break him into thousands of pieces only to pick him up again because he was yours, yours, yours.

Threading your fingers to his hair, you dragged him closer to you. Breathed him in, pawed at his shirt in a demand for him to take it off. He was more than willing to oblige, the two of you making quick work of his buttons in between messy, breathy kisses. Shirt discarded, he grabbed your ass and your legs wrapped around his waist on instinct – the next sequence of events like a movie you’d seen before.

Your clothes on the carpeted floor.

Rintaro on top of you, your fingers intertwined beside your head. His lips on your neck, bruises on your skin and the imprint of his hands on your hips. Your mewls right on his ear. The quivering of your thighs, the stain on the sheets – the day turning into night, from dusk until dawn. He thrusts deep, enough to have you inhaling sharply through your nose. And there it was – the unmistakable scent of a vanilla perfume you’ve never owned. It’s everywhere in the room now that your eyes opened, the hazy cloud of lust ebbing away. Iris’ perfume on your vanity area, a discarded pair of white lacy thongs that wasn’t yours peeking from under the closet, and her scent – her stupidly sweet, innocent scent – blanketing the silk of your sheets.

Slowly, your fingers detached from Suna as you turned to the sides, inhaling the sheets once more because it couldn’t be, right? Maybe you had it wrong. Rintaro wouldn’t do that, he couldn’t be so cruel. You never even shared this bed with him ever since you got married. You’ve never had him hold you close as you fall asleep, never had your head resting on his chest while you both waited for the next day. He was a cruel man, yes, but he wouldn’t dare do this to you. Not while you were gone, he wouldn’t, he wouldn’t, he wouldn’t.

Yet there it was, the scent of a floral shampoo you couldn’t recognize on your pillows, and the faint smatters of vanilla and cinnamon lingered behind.

And when the damage is done, and your heart is more confused now than ever – Rintaro momentarily slumps before you, held up only by his arms, he realizes too late the tears stained on your cheeks.

“You brought her here.”

It wasn’t a question, not even an accusation. You spoke nothing but the truth, and Rintaro’s crestfallen face said it all. He’d brought her here, made love with her on your bed. Somehow, finding out that he’d fucked her in the one place you found solace in the Palace hurt more than knowing he fucked her everywhere else.

It was as if he’d stained you. Spat right at your face. Desecrated the one place you wished to hold him in, and rubbed it in your face that he couldn’t make love to you in your bed. But he could with her, because it was always going to be her, wasn’t it?

No matter how hard you tried, it was never going to be you.

Silence dawned on the room. There’s nothing but the rapid beating of your hearts, and the soft sniffles you muffle behind your first. He sees two things on your face that night: one of beauty, and one of regret. He dared himself to be brave, to wipe your tears with the pad of his thumb. The motion was oddly comforting, and for a moment – just a quick moment – you allowed yourself to be vulnerable. Leaning into the warmth of his palm, more tears dampened his skin. You were torn between asking him to stay, to hold you until it hurt less, and asking him to leave and give you a moment for yourself.

But Rintaro had already decided.

With a final kiss to your forehead, your husband crawled out of the bed. He glanced at you one last time before slipping his ring off, setting it on your bedside table, before quietly – and resolutely – leaving you behind.

[seventeendeer]

my lifelong special interest in sonic the hedgehog has both a very sincere side (those little animal characters are so cute! these games are fun! yay bright colors and the power of friendship!) and a side I can only describe as "morbid fascination with all the ways a long-running franchise can try to do a million different things and none of them are good or right or nourishing to the human spirit"

today, I would like to take you all on a special journey through the latter !

did you know that, at a conservative estimate, there have been attempts to create a recurring love interest for the blue man himself no less than FIVE SEPARATE TIMES. MORE IF YOU COUNT THE ONES THAT WERE NOT SUPPOSED TO LAST

below is Madonna (left) and Breezie (right). Madonna was a damsel in distress type character Sonic would've been saving in an early draft of the OG 1991 game. Breezie was a temporary love interest in the 90's cartoon, Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog, who seems to be inspired by the scrapped Madonna concept.

another scrapped love interest was Tiara Boobowski, who was at one point in development going to be a playable character in Sonic X-treme, a game intended for release in the 90's, though it never materialized. it seems her story went through a few different iterations before development ceased. she has the dubious honor of being the first "princess" character created for the purpose of being Sonic's love interest, which would be revisited at least two more times in other contexts.

the first love interest to stick around for a while was Princess Sally Acorn, developed from the squirrel critter design in the early games into a major supporting character in the 90's cartoon Sonic SatAM (left), then kept around in various iterations in the comic book spin-off series published by Archie Comics (middle + right) until the series' end in the mid-10's. she was in an on-and-off relationship with Sonic over those decades, for better or for worse, and they had by far the longest running romance arc out of all of Sonic's love interests to date. after suffering every romantic melodrama plotline imaginable, she was unceremoniously booted from the franchise when the rights to Sonic comic books were moved over to IDW Publishing. rest in peace, Sally, you didn't deserve any of that. at the very least for five minutes towards the end, she stopped dating Sonic and it was implied she started dating her long-time gal pal, Nicole, so she had that going for her for a little bit. counting our blessings

speaking of romantic melodrama, the Archie comics also gave Sonic a temporary love interest in Mina Mongoose because they wanted to write in a love triangle. there was a "main characters all grown up and starting nuclear families" future story at one point where they married Mina off to Tails instead, which somehow felt deeply cruel to both Mina and Tails. "hand-me-down love interest" is a bad, bad vibe for everyone involved

a few years on, in the mid 00's, the games were having their own weird little time giving Sonic a short-lived romance arc with new addition to the cast, Princess Elise the Third, who only showed up in the game Sonic the Hedgehog (2006) and managed to lay one singular smooch on Sonic's corpse to bring him back from the dead, disney style, before she was banished from the franchise due to a monumental amount of backlash (against both her character and the game as a whole). I'm beaming hostile psychic waves into sega's headquarters until they bring her back with better writing and none of that stupid shit. they did it with Silver, they have no excuse

and of course we finally have the one. the only. the most persistent girly of all time who's been trying to marry Sonic since 1993 and is still truckin' on in the year of our lord 2025 even though he's slippery as an eel and he "don't wanna" and there's kind of an uncomfortable age difference and reciprocated romance has over time become more or less outlawed by Sega because it never really pans out for them for some inexplicable mysterious reason. everybody's favorite hyper violent child psychic AMY ROSE !!!!

great character!! has always had so much potential to do her own cool thing if only they'd let her!! if they don't drop the stupid "kinda love interest, kinda not" aspect of her character soon, I'm going to start CRYING BLOOD!! FREE HER <3

anyway honorary mention also goes to Blaze the Cat (left, game continuity, still active), Bunnie Rabbot (center, Sonic SatAM + Archie comics, goners with the Archie series cancellation) and Fiona Fox (right, Archie comics, also goners, same deal), who, while not introduced as love interests, have all been put into some kind of romantic context with Sonic at one point or another just because

(and also while not really relevant to the topic at hand, I would be remiss not to give a special shout-out to the multitude of male characters who were most likely never intended to have any romantic connection to Sonic, but because this series is shonen anime inspired and the rivalries get crazy, our boy still has to hear shit like this on the regular)

and like, you know I've probably forgotten some more girlies out there, too. Sonic the Hedgehog has been pelted with potential romance arcs since the day he was created, and I'm sure there are more out there lost to time/my shoddy memory.

and it's just ... so profoundly morbidly funny to me. unstoppable force (heteronormativity) VS immovable object (misogyny). countless futile attempts to convince kids across the world that a cool guy like Sonic TOTALLY GETS GIRLS, DAMN IT, HE IS FULFILLING HIS HETEROSEXUALITY QUOTA, WE PROMISE, combined with this utter disinterest in sufficiently developing female characters who can effectively fill that role. even Sally Acorn, who was put through hell in the spin-off comics for DECADES serving as the designated narrative romantic punching bag, would eventually go gentle into that good night without fanfare because porting her into a new continuity would just be so much worrrrrk ughhh she's not even Sonic's girlfriend anymore so whateverrrrr

though as much as a massive L as this is for women, at the very least these poor girls are taking the obligatory main character romantic subplot down with them. taking one for the team here. Sonic is so fast and so smooth, those cringey romance plots just slide right off the wind screen of his character and I at least love that part. I love that it never works out and our protagonist remains utterly unpairable. and I hope nothing ever sticks. and I hope the current staff continue to get better at writing female characters just for the sake of having some cool girls around who are interesting in their own right. and may a thousand more cynical, sexist, half-assed attempts to awkwardly shoehorn romance into stories where it doesn't belong wither and die just as spectacularly, booyah

[artbyblastweave]

With a couple days to chew on it I've gotta say I've really come to appreciate the Untwist surrounding Nina's character. She's coded as a specific kind of guy, right, who shows up in a lot of Ensemble superhero stuff and Gunn's superhero stuff specifically- the innocuous neurotic with a middling power who ultimately comes in clutch at the last minute and demonstrates why they actually did belong on the team the entire time. "Heart is an awesome power", in TVtropes parlance. Polka-Dot man and Ratcatcher, Vigilante, Groot to an extent in the first Guardians movie.

So you spend seven episodes with this one member of the ensemble who never kills anyone, doesn't try and doesn't want to, gets haplessly dragged from nightmarish situation to nightmarish situation with no say in anything, spends a significant amount of the show's runtime trapped in a goddamn bathtub, and you've been trained to assume that she's going to get some kind of big moment that retroactively justifies all of that, demonstrates why Waller thought she was a good addition to the team. And then it turns out, no, she actually was just fundamentally poorly suited to this lifestyle. She had a superhero origin, the same kind of emergency power-granting medical intervention that Cyborg and Beast Boy got, but it turns out that Gunn's version of the DCU is a weird enough place that that's just a kind of thing that can happen to children sometimes, not something that guarantees that you'll actually become a viable superhero. She genuinely had no business being on the team, except that she looked weird enough that she got legally unpersoned and handed over to Waller, and Waller thought she looked weird enough that there was no reason not to try pointing her like a gun to see if she could do anything useful. No skin off her nose if she's a dud munition- you don't end up on the Suicide Squad because you're hard to replace, you end up on the squad because you're available and there won't be any blowback if you go missing.

This is, of course, one of the tensions that Suicide Squad and associated projects occasionally run into- you need to strike a balance between staffing the team with villains who're competent enough that Waller doesn't come off like a moron for entrusting them with anything important, and villains who're inept, underwhelming or out-of-control enough to remind you that half the point of the squad thematically is that it's a corrupt and morally bankrupt idea that on a really good day breaks even on solving as many problems as it creates. The usual fix is to include some number of mauve shirts who're included entirely to die badly- Slipknot in the Ayer film, Mindboggle in the first arc of the original Ostrander run, Voltiac in the first arc of the New 52 run, Most of Rick Flag's decoy team in the opening of The Suicide Squad. All played for some combination of shock-value and kafkaesque dark humor (did anyone check if Weasel can swim?) but rarely played for tragedy. These deaths are tone-setters, too early for you to care enough for it to be tragic. Nina is a well-disguised Slipknot, with her pointless, anticlimactic death bumped to the end of the story in a way that lets you get attached to her- which in turn finally, finally allows the narrative to hammer home that what keeps happening to the Slipknots and Javelins in these stories is fucked up. Nina didn't belong here! She's the only one of these people who doesn't have a codename! She gets the big, heartfelt you-can-do-it- you're-one-of-us speech from The Bride and Phosphorous, she strides out to finally get her Big Moment, and then no, she really really isn't one of them, and all that happens is that she ends up getting gutted like a. like a. Hey. Hang on