#and richard pretty much went “well if you're not going to bother to use your gifts then we're not going to bother to look after you.

[walkingstackofbooks]

"He's a very gifted young man. I hope you're putting all his talents to good use, Captain."

"We try."

"Well, sometimes you have to push him a little. It took quite a while to talk him into taking up medicine, but he did."

"Yes, and threatening to kick me out did wonders for my anxiety, didn't it?"

The biting sarcasm was out of Julian's mouth before he had a chance to think about what he was saying. So much for Rule Number Two: Never badmouth your father in public. Clearly, he was out of practice at playing happy families.

His words had startled the office into silence; the smiles of just a few seconds ago were now conspicuously absent.

"I'm sorry, Captain, I-I shouldn't have--" he started - though, what he was apologising for, he wasn't quite sure. Being a nuisance, perhaps, for airing his teenage angst rather unprofessionally?

Sisko was grim, tight-lipped as he turned to Jadzia.

"Lieutenant, would you mind finding quarters for our guests? Doctor Bashir hadn't finished going through his argonite report, and I'm eager to get back to it."

It was a thin excuse - thin enough that even Richard Bashir ought to have been able to see through it - but to Julian's surprise, his father made no protest. Nor did his mother, although she stared accusingly at Julian, clutching Richard tightly as they made their exit. It seemed they were just as surprised at the turn of events as Julian himself was.

"Sit down, Doctor," Sisko said kindly, and Julian felt his body move to obey.

[gothicprep]

the new statesman recently published dueling essays by richard dawkins and jacqueline rose. dawkins' essay is entitled "Why biological sex matters" and rose's is "The gender binary is false"

i'm not envious of rose's position here at all. dawkins, for all his issues, is a very clear science writer, which redounds to him being a better writer in general. but it's beyond frustrating to see someone defending a position i agree with with extremely low quality argumentation.

rose writes:

"What is a woman?” The formulation has the merit of suggesting that to be a woman, far from being obvious, is a question, and one susceptible to more than a single reply. This is encouraging at a time when the fight over the definition of what a woman is has taken on such virulence. Being a woman is at risk of becoming a protected category, as the binary man/woman hardens into place.

at risk... of becoming... a protected category... well, i have some news for you that you're not going to like. i'm not sure how it's evaded you for this long, but better late than never, huh?

i'm inferring here that rose is using it in a more colloquial sense than i'm reading this. but "protected category" has a very specific (and legal) definition so. i'm not sure why you'd verbalize your point this way. but even that colloquial usage doesn't work! rose is a feminist professor, and i'm sure she'd agree that women have to deal with some metric of vulnerability.

she continues:

This is happening even though it has always been a central goal of feminism to repudiate the very idea of womanhood, as a form of coercive control that means the end of freedom.

holy fuck, this is so stupid. or more fairly, this is highly debatable and it comes down to what she's talking about when she says "womanhood". and she never spells it out.

and. um. let's get to the "best" part...

In fact, the term “female”, as distinct from women, has its own tale. As the New York Magazine critic Andrea Long Chu has written in her book Females (2019), the biological category “female”, as it is understood today, was developed in the 19th century as a way of referring to black slaves. A female black slave was someone refused “the status of social and legal personhood”. To that extent, Chu observes, “a female has always been less than a person”. To assume that “female” is a neutral biological category is, therefore, historically naive and racially blind.

uh. alright. this isn't true. like at all. don't even get me started on andrea long chu dude. sure, she went to duke, but that doesn't exonerate her from being a bullshit artist. which she is. and from what i've read of her work, i seriously don't understand why she transitioned at all. in her mind, women are pretty much empty holes for the world to abuse. maybe she, like, hates herself and the "women are the lowest thing on earth, this is what i deserve" thing is an insane projection. who knows? you couldn't make me bother wanting to figure it out if you paid me.

but this also isn't an accurate reading of that part of chu's book either... this is what it actually says.

As far back as the 14th century, the word female was used to refer to women, with a particular emphasis on their childbearing capacity. But it arguably didn't acquire the technical sense of "a human mammal of the female sex" until the rise of the biological disciplines of the 19th century. In the United States, the man known as the father of gynecology, J. Marion Sims, built the field in the Antebellum South, operating on enslaved women in his backyard, often without anesthesia or, of course, consent. As C. Riley Snorton has recently documented, the distinction between biological females and women as a social category, far from a neutral scientific observation, developed precisely in order for the cap to block women from being recognized as female, making Sims' research applicable to his women patients in polite white society without being granted legal personhood. Sex was produced, in other words, precisely at the juncture that gender was denied. In this sense, a female has always been less than a person.

so, c riley snorton is a black trans scholar at uchicago. chu's referencing chapter 1 of his book called "Black on Both Sides: A Racial History of Trans Identity". i read that chapter, and i cannot for the life of me figure out where she got this idea that snorton is arguing that sims invented a new meaning for the term "female" for racist reasons or for any other reason. i don't speak theory, so maybe i missed it, but i think what's happening here is that jacqueline rose is misreading andrea long chu, who's misreading c rily snorton, who may very well be misreading j marion sims for all i know. snorton says in the introduction to his book, quote: "This is not a history per se, so much as it is a set of political propositions, theories of history, and writerly experiment." so there's that. and if you look up the etymology for the term female (which i did, i've gotten this far), it comes from the latin word for young woman or girl. so even in the 14th century, the term was applied to people.

this is just... laughable, honestly. is jacqueline rose going senile? are we human or are we dancer? i just wish people wouldn't throw up all this smoke to make these bullshit arguments. you can support trans rights without doing this shit.

[ifliamsmile]

Never felt so good to be so wrong (enemies to lovers) - Dick Grayson Imagine

pairing:Dick Grayson x Titan!Reader

request: “heeey honey, can you do one like enemies to lovers with 5 and 50? i love u girl, you and your write are perfect 🤧”

prompts: 5. “What are we fighting for?"

50. “Why are you in my bed?” ‘It’s actually my bed…”

notes: @jurassicpzrk​ i hope you like it, lovely gurl, i’m sorry i took so long, i was trying to do my best. xxxxx<3

notes²: thank you to my girls, without your support i wouldn’t do this. @incorrect-titans-quotes @donnatr0y​ @wintercapilson​

“I still can’t believe we finally did it” Dick said putting his arms behind his head and your eyes drifted towards his arms admiring him. You chastised yourself, you weren’t supposed to think things like this since you both didn’t get along that well

“After many tries, we got her. Nothing could be better than this.” it was the first time in years in which you and Dick would actually talk instead of barking at each other.

The group sat together in the living room to celebrate Poison Ivy’s imprisonment. 

“We’d have done it sooner if we had followed my plan since the beginning but that’s okay” you said with a smirk, pushing his buttons, knowing that he was going to respond to your little snarky comments.

“I think you trust yourself way more than you should” he said taking a sip of his beer.

“What do you mean, Grayson?” you told him

“I mean that I am the leader for a reason, and the plan went just the way it needed to be. My way” he said with his usually tone of superiority that he loved to use with you  knowing how much you hated it.

“Now i remembered why i hate you so much.” you said  getting close to his face “Fuck you and your leadership” you finished the sentence with poison in your words.

“What are we fighting for?”  Dick asked you trying to understand the purpose of all of this. “We won, our plans complemented each other and we got her, that’s what matters.” you listened to him and even thought he annoyed you he had a point. Today was for celebrating.

“I offer you a truce.” He said not waiting for you to answer, you raised your eyebrows not believing him completely “Just for today, let’s ignore the fact that we hate each other and let’s celebrate.”

“I’ll think about it, and maybe if you weren’t such an ass” you mocked him “it wouldn’t be an impossible mission.” you said and left to get another beer.

--

You made your way to the kitchen and you didn’t notice that Donna was right behind you.

You were getting a beer when you heard her voice next to you:

“So...did I just witness you and Dick actually get along for once?” she asked.

“i think you're hallucinating, you know how much i hate him.” You said not very convinced anymore. You couldn’t even remember why it all started to be honest.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night” she replied taking a sip of his beer not believing you for a second.

--

“Here” you handed Dick another beer “I’ll take your truce, but only tonight” you half smiled at him and sat by his side.

He smiled at you and accepted the beer, you didn’t know if it was the alcohol or what but Dick’s lips looked so kissable, you took a sip of your beer hoping that he hadn’t noticed you looking at his mouth.  “Tomorrow we can go back to normal” he said and you agreed. It wouldn’t hurt to try, right?

You looked at the other side of the room when you saw Hank dancing ula-ula with Dawn, and the woman wouldn’t stop laughing. The beers were definitely making effect.

“Oh my god” you said stifling a laugh and Dick also looked at his friend’s direction and burst out laughing. The moment was good and you welcomed it without reluctance; all the fighting and the nagging were now forgotten and you were just two adults having a good time with your friends.

When you looked back at Dick, you saw the boy already starting at you. 

You were too high to believe he was looking at you in purpose, maybe you were just drunk. But he knew it was very much in purpose, because in this moment he wasn’t that capable of hiding his true feelings for you like he did everyday. 

“Dick, come here,  it’s your time to play out limbo with me!” Kory called Dick whining for his attention and you quietly rolled your eyes, Dawn held the rope along with Hank and everyone laughed when Gar couldn’t pass through it. 

You looked at Kory and Dick laughing together and you felt something weird, you tried to fight it, but you knew that feeling and it was jealousy but he wasn’t yours, you actually hated him and it didn’t make any sense.

 “You don’t fool me” you heard Donna’s voice and it seemed that she had appeared from out of nowhere.

“What?” you asked, after taking your eyes off of Dick and Kory.

“Dick. You’re in too deep.” 

“Shut up. You’re not playing with them?”  you asked her, trying to change the subject quickly but this didn’t go unnoticed by Donna.

“Oh no, i’m not drunk enough to do that” she replied finishing her drink and leaving you alone with your thoughts.

She was right, you were in too deep. You hated yourself for that. First: he hated you and you had to pretend to feel the same way. Whenever you met, you argued. You even liked it, seeing his face whenever his plans or decisions were questioned by you, but deep down, you knew he was not that  arrogant; you knew how many qualities he had although it was hard to admit. 

You sat far away from Kory and him, because it became too much to see the two always together getting along so well.

Across the room Dick had the exact same thoughts. He felt bad about being with Kory, thinking about someone else the person who hated him: you. Despite Kory being an amazing woman, it was impossible for him to see her as something else. She was not you.

You were immerse in your own thoughts when he appear by your side.

“Here” he said handing you a shot of tequila, taking the now lukewarm beer out of your hands.

“Are you trying to get me drunk Grayson?” you smirked.

“No, i’m just trying to see if you can be nicer with this.” 

“Fuck you, Grayson” you both smiled and took the tequila, the liquid went down burning your throat.

 “Ready for another?” he asked you.

“You need to calm down, I could barely swallow that and you want me to take another one? Do you wanna kill me?” you told him laughing. Shit, he was making you laugh.

“What? Why the hell would I do that?” Dick asked pretending to feel disappointed.

“Because you hate me?” you answered him.

Dick laughed.“Is that what you think?” He shook his head. “You’re an arrogant twat and you’re annoying as hell, but I don’t hate you.”

“Yeah well, is not going to work the other way around though. i still hate you.” You told him getting closer.

“Yeah, and why?” he asked, confronting you.

“Because you’re an ass and you think that you’re the last coca cola in the world, which is not true.” you answered being sassy.

“Right.” he said getting dangerously closer to your face “But i’ll make you a drink anyways. No hard feelings, you know?” he said with charming smile.

“Should I trust you to make me a drink, Grayson?” you asked him not very sure of that.

“You should” he said and you both went to the bar.

“it’s probably going to be the worst drink i've ever had anyways.” you mocked him.

“Just wait and se Y/LN, just wait and see” he said radiating confidence. 

Dick put a lot of things in the cup and started to mix the ingredients. You could only stared at the man in front of you. Since when was Dick so nice? You decided to stop asking questions, and just enjoy the moment. Dick poured the contents into an ornate glass.

 He cut a lemon and placed it on the rim of the glass.

 “The best drink you will ever drink” Dick said, extending the drink to you. You looked fearfully at the glass. 

“Come on, try it” He encouraged. You looked again at the drink, closed your eyes, and drank. 

The drink was sweet, and bitter. Hot and cold, all at the same time. You could hardly tell the taste of alcohol. It was good. 

“Wow Richard” you smiled “It's actually pretty good” Dick smiled with satisfaction. That fucking confident smile that used to get you so mad, now you just got all hot and bothered

“Do you want to know what’s the name of that drink?” He asked, looking extremely serious.

You didn't understand the question, but you smirked. You didn't understood Dick's sudden seriousness.

“What’s its name?” You asked. Dick moved closer to you.

“Kiss Me.”  You didn't know if he meant it, or if it was just the name of the drink. 

His seriousness proved the first option. Without thinking twice, You pressed your lips to Dick's, who immediately hugged you tightly. 

Depending on Dick's reaction, she could blame the drink. But his reaction was not one to complain about.

 He pressed your bodies impossible closer, and kissed you as if the world was going to end. His hands lightly tugged on your hair. 

They didn't think, they didn't know how they would look when they broke the kiss. In fact, neither of them wanted to leave that kiss so soon. 

They both waited years for this, and didn't want it to end anytime soon. Dick bit your lower lip and broke the kiss.

Both with incredibly red lips.  Dick started giving you small kisses on your neck. He was intoxicated by your perfume. You shivered with each touch of the boy. You never wanted that night to end.

Still hugging you, Dick looked deep into your eyes, pressing his forehead against yours. He had no idea what to say. You put your arms around his neck to hear his voice finally say:

“I think we should go somewhere else” he said with a hoarse voice that made you forget about everything, about who you were about who he was, the sexual tension that was established was palpable.

“yeah” you breath out as led you to his bedroom.

--

He opened the door without breaking the kiss, he didn’t want to take the risk of letting you go, making you realize that you still hated him for some reason. He closed the door behind him with his free hand while the other held your waist.

I feel like a hero

And you're my heroine

Do you know that your love is the sweetest sin?

You both could still hear the music coming from the living room as your teammates went crazy and drank like there was no tomorrow. It was Hero/Heroine from Boys like girls. It didn’t matter anyways, because you both were now on your own worlds.

And I feel a weakness coming on

Never felt so good to be so wrong

The music played and Dick smiled when he heard a particular phrase.

Dick carefully touched your lips, as if you were kissing for the first time. He put one hand on your neck, and with the other he stroked your hair. Dick started peppering kisses along  your neck, making your body shiver. Dick noticed and smiled.

And you caught me off guard

Now I'm running and screaming

With each touch of Dick, you felt your body heat up. Dick pulled you in , placing you on his lap as he sat on his bed, without stopping to kiss. You took his shirt off to see the vision that any woman would dream to.

As you kissed, Dick put his hand on the your leg  as the kiss heated up. 

Dick realized what he was doing, and what was about to happen. He stopped, and looked you in the eye. You were a mess. A beautiful mess.

He didn’t wanted it to be like this, both drunk almost out of conscience, he wanted it more than he could tell and he wanted it to be so good but he also wanted you to remember. 

“Yn” he said and you couldn’t understand why he stopped, you were too drunk to control yourself and understand it was the best decision.

“What? Why did we stop?” you asked feeling sad.

“Because I want you to remember everything” he said softly.

“But I will” you said and your words already rolling up told him he was right.

“Lay down with me.” he said leading you to lay by his side.You laid and looked at him while he also looked in your eyes, you were facing each other. You felt the smell of his perfume in the pillowcases and it felt so good and comfortable. 

“If i sleep here with you, you promise that we’ll still hate each other in the morning?” you asked fighting through sleep.

“I’ll do my best” he smiled softly at you, seeing you surrendering to your tiredness and he closed his eyes, enjoying your presence until he also fell asleep.

--

You woke up with the sunlight hitting your face through the curtains, you slept so heavily that you didn’t even remember how you got in your bed. Dick woke up with your moves, looking at your confused face.

“Hey” he said

“Why are you in my bed?” you asked him trying to understand the situation.

‘It’s actually my bed…" he answered in an obvious tone.

“Did we...?” you lift the blanket that covered both of you to see if your clothes were still on, and they were. You sat on the bed and he did it too.

“No, relax. We just slept, that’s all” he answered calmly and you remembered everything that happened yesterday. If you weren’t with him now, you’d probably think it was a dream. A weird one.

“Oh...okay.” you said and Dick instantly recognized the disappointment in your voice.

“Are you...disappointed?” he asked lifting one of his eyebrows, he hoped you felt as disappointed as he did.

“Uhm...no, i’m not. it’s fine” you answered him with your head down. 

“Y/n, Hey.”

“I know I kissed you, Dick. It was the drink, i know you meant that kiss me was the name and...” you said nonstop until he interrupted you.

“Hey, hey, just listen to me. It wasn’t the drink, you wanted this as much as i did; and to be clear, I don’t hate you.”

“And why didn’t we do anything?” 

“Because when we do, it’s going to be so good and i want you to remember it.” he said and your body trembled, you thanked god that you were sat.

“Then show me, Grayson. I think we wasted enough time.”

Dick didn’t answer, he grabbed you by the waist taking you to his lap and this time he took your shirt off.

He wanted to enjoy you as much as he could, he didn’t know about tomorrow. He just knew that now, you and him were only lovers, not enemies anymore.

[limenysnocket]

●The Blush Bet●

Pt. IV: The Do-Over

Summary: After finally getting his feelings out in the open, Taika decides that it's right about time that he takes (Y/N) out for a proper date. He calls it a do-over for the last one he took her on.

Request: @honorarytenenbaum

Warnings: Swearing, alcohol and quite a bit of car se- I mean, smut.

A/N: Hehehhh, I've had this idea in my head for the longest time. Peak Taika time, you guys. Drunk Taika time... Touchy feely Taika time... a bit of riding Taika time... OH, this is the last part, by the way. I'll stop bothering you with this story. Lol

●□■●□■●□■●□■●

You stared at the new dress in the mirror. Pure white, strappless, slits down both legs and a lovely, black belt around the waist. Taika outdid himself this time and, a lot like the bad date he took you on, he didn't tell you much about where you were going or what the night would entail, but you couldn't be any happier than you were now.

You smoothed out the bottom half of the dress and tucked a sweet little hair behind your ear. For once, you were happy to be dressed up by someone else. You couldn't help but be a little nervous, though. You were always so nervous before dates, even if you knew the guy pretty well. You just had a tendency of worrying about tripping over your heels or going to the bathroom then come out with the back of your dress tucked into your underwear. You had nothing to worry about this time, but you still worried.

Your phone suddenly went off and made you jump. You reached for it, a gentle smile on your face as you read the notification.

'I'm outside, darling. Hope you're just as excited as I am! ;)'

You giggle to yourself, tuck your phone in your handbag and take one last look at yourself, as if you thought there was a massive smudge in your makeup that could ruin your night. You put on a smile, fix a little uncomfortable place in your heel, did a little body wiggle and went to your door and opened it.

Your smile got wider. The man of the hour was standing right in front of you, dressed in a navy blue tux and a snow white rose in the breastpocket. His hand was holding yours, the moment he saw you and he brought you closer with just a simple beckoning tug.

"Your boyfriend must have wonderful tastes, because that dress looks absolutely amazing on you," Taika purred with a kiss to the back of your hand.

"Well, my boyfriend is pretty wonderful," you hummed back and softly tugged your hand away so you could wrap your arms around his neck. He set his hands on your waist and leaned down to press his lips against yours. Your bottom lip was encased in his and you felt his hands creep away from your waist, to your hips, then to your ass. You had to pull away from the kiss before he could do that, "No, no, sir. We can't do that yet. We still have a date."

Taika only half groaned, but you knew he didn't mind. He must have made one hell of a reservation if it even made him pass up the opportunity for sex.

"Your ride awaits you, madam and sir," you heard someone call from down on the curb and you leaned to look past Taika, who briefly moved to look with you.

"Holy shit-- You brought Robert too?" You smiled and looked up at Taika. He was grinning and biting his bottom lip slightly.

"Just wouldn't be the same without him. I'd miss him if I didn't let him drive tonight," Taika said, taking your hand in his and escorting you down to the curb.

"Good evening, miss!" Robert greeted you with a very bright smile and a tip of his cap.

"Robert, my lanta! You have no idea how great it is to see you!" You smiled right back at him. "Did you ever get together with that one woman you saw outside that restaurant?"

"I actually did," Robert smiled. "Never knew a chap like myself could get a date at my age! I'm actually going out with her, tonight, thanks to Mr. Waititi!"

"Oh, really now?" You cocked a brow and grinned over at your date who was casually and quietly enjoying the banter he wasn't involved in.

"Wanted him to have a little fun too, doll. I was gonna tell you, don't be surprised when we end with a new driver back home tonight," he smiled down at you and nudged you with his hip.

"Well, no time to waste! Your evening awaits you!" Robert bounced on his heels then opened the door. Luckily, it wasn't an old fart limo that you were riding in tonight. It was a sleek, black, luxurious Mercedes that he was taking you in tonight and you were extremely flattered with all the effort Taika was putting in for you. It almost turned you on... almost.

During the ride to the more rich side of town, Taika kept his hand on your thigh and gently rubbed every now and then. You would turn and give him a cheeky little grin and a wink. You knew he wanted a little something before he left for the night.

You expected to pass the big fancy restaurant that he had teased you in front of, but when you ended up parking right in front of it, you nearly got whiplash from how hard your head snapped in Taika's direction. "Pulling the same joke twice isn't funny, Waititi!" You pout, almost and he snickers.

"This isn't a joke! Richard, tell her this isn't a joke, so she'll believe me!" Taika said, almost in an exasperated tone.

Richard turned the car off and in a very merry voice he said, "It's not a joke, miss! He even showed me his online ticket to prove he had a reservation this time!"

You're face was expressionless for a very long while. It was like Ross whenever he found out he was the father of Rachel's baby.

"You promise this isn't a fib?" You ask the man next to you, quietly. Your lip was softly quivering.

"I have no reason to lie to you anymore," he said back with a very warm gaze and a matching smile. His fingers interlocked with yours and he brought it up to kiss the back of your hand again. Gosh, you loved it when he did that.

Richard eventually got the two of you out of the car, and you waved goodbye to him, side you wouldn't be seeing him after dinner. He told you that his date was waiting for him down the street, then waved you off as well to have your pleasant evening and pleasant dinner with Taika in the most expensive restaurant in the entirety of L.A.

You could practically smell the money on the people around you while they stuffed themselves fat on cash salads.

"I swear, if they end up taking us down to a sub-basement or something for people who want to think their eating rich, I'm going to flip my shit," you said teasingly while you secretly looked around at the sparkling chandeliers with much awe and admiration.

"I don't even think this place has a sub-basement, so you're in luck!" Taika laughed as he pulled you along, up to a waiter where he flashed him the reservation on his phone. The waiter, dressed in a deep red vest and black slacks, nodded at the confirmation, grabbed two menus then escorted you to your table, which just so happened to be on the second floor. Lucky you, you got to go through the little archway leading to the stairs, gayly dressed in evergreen leaves and electric lights.

As you sat down at your seat, you took the time to admire the place even more. The food made your stomach growl, the lighting cast upon Taika's face made your heart flutter and you were dressed ever so perfectly. Wow... just a week ago, you could have never imagined Taika doing something so lavish for you. Now, it felt like every act of kindness he did for you was a gift from the king, himself.

"Enjoying the scenery, darling?" You heard Taika say from across the table and it caught your attention in a flash.

"How can I not be?" You said, giving him a warm, wide smile. It made him melt, you could tell. The look he had made it easy to spot that he was falling deeper in love with you, right before your very eyes. He reached over for your hand and once he had it, he caressed it with his thumb. He continued to hold it while he spoke to you, all the way up until the scheduled bottle of wine arrived and the waiter was back to take your order...

○●■○●■○●■○●○

"I don't know about you, but that sirloin certainly stuffed me," Taika giggled at his own alliteration and you laughed along too, as he guided you back down the lavish stairs and back out the arch. Your arm was hooked around his, and while you both made your way out the building, you talked about whimsical story ideas that both of you brewed up together and wouldn't probably pull through with, but it was still so much fun to see what stirred within your collided imaginations. The real reason you were hanging off of each other is, because both of you happened to be quite wine drunk at the moment, and didn't care enough to notice.

You both reached the curb and were still bubbling away, since the Mercedes was running a tad slow, but all was well.

It eventually fell quiet between you two and your just stared into each other's eyes, exasperated with how much you both just shared with each other and taking a few moments to look back at the story you created. It was a mixture of feelings, jotting out in random directions, rough around the edges, but soft as an angel's wings. You couldn't be happier with it.

"Before we start taking notes," you said, laughing and tucking a stray strand if hair behind your ear, "I just want to say... I think this is the best date I've ever had. No, I'm not trying to inflate your ego, but... You deserve it this time. I'm proud of you, Tai, as weird as it is." You giggle at your own speech and lean in to kiss his forehead. Instead of his forehead, however, you come in contact with his lips instead, by his own devices.

He kissed you wantonly and almost needingly. You willingly fell prey to the kiss and slipped into a coma-like state where his lips were the only thing you needed to keep living. When you two parted, you panted and blushed immensely. You could taste the wine on his lips. You both had quite a few glasses, you'll admit...

His cheeks were a salmon color and his eyes were now glossed over, lips the lightly stained with your lipstick. You found yourself blushing even more at the sight. "So," you said with a hiccup resonating in your chest, "my place or yours?"

"Oh, sweetheart, I don't think we're even going to make it to either of those places," he smirked down at you and bit his lip. You gulped, because the sleek Mercedes pulled up right next to the two of you and a brand new driver hopped out and opened the door.

Taika pressed a feather light hand on your back and guided you into the backseat of the car. You could have sworn you felt his hand hovering over your ass at some point in time.

Once the two of you were in the car and the door was shut, it was all dark and very quiet, except for the slow breathing of you and the other two people in the car and the quiet radio, turned to an oldies station.

Your heart rate seemed to increase. You felt Taika's hand slither over to the slit in the leg of your dress and he quietly felt around it, until he slipped his hand completely under it. You said nothing, but you couldn't help but reach for his sleeve, encouraging him on. If this was going to happen, you needed to remain quiet.

He teased you for the longest time as the car creeped through slow traffic. He didn't start getting down on you until you had reached the first stoplight of what you might say be fourteen or so on.

His fingers teased your clit through your damp panties and he rubbed the cloth in slow circles. You had to bury your face into his arm to stop yourself from begging him for more. He suddenly nipped the shell of your ear to make your breath hitch and he chuckled, "Such a good girl~, being all quiet for daddy~." His other hand has now joined the games and started to grip and massage your warm thigh.

Taika continued to drive you insane by teasing the hem of your panties, not knowing if he should mess with the real thing or not. He wanted to be patient, Taika did... but Drunk-Taika was never a man of patience, as far as Taika, himself, knew.

You were so close to moaning, biting down on Taika's sleeve, whenever he suddenly yanked both of his hands away from you, leaving you a horny mess, beside him. You looked up at him in the dark, confused and a little upset, but he said nothing and waited until the next stoplight.

The car peeled into a stop, slowly, behind other cars. Taika made quick work of unbuckling both your and his seatbelts. Now, you were curious.

Taika dug around in his wallet for a moment, pulled out a couple hundreds and leaned forward so his head poked up right beside the driver, who was startled by the encounter. "I'm going to pay you a very big tip," Taika said to the driver in a very low, husky voice, "and you're going to let me fuck my girlfriend in the back seat. How does that sound?" Taika waved the large sum of cash in front of the man's face. You heard the driver gulp, then you saw him nod through the faint blackness.

"Good man," Taika chuckled deeply and set the cash down in the cup holder. "If I catch you looking back, it's getting taken away." Taika warned him, but didn't warn you as he sat back down and grabbed you by the hips as the car started to move again. He sat you on his lap and he nearly ripped the zipper on the back of your dress down, then tore the entire thing off of you.

"Told you we wouldn't make it~," Taika growled seductively and it made your walls really start to soak as he licked his chops like a feral dog, right in front of you.

"T-Taika~," you breathed softly by his ear, so he would be the only one to hear it.

"Always so shy in the beginning," Taika sighed and, yet again, without another warning, he smacked your ass, making you yelp. "What's the name I go by, when we fuck, doll~? I want to hear you say it."

"D-Daddy~," you moaned a little louder this time, so you didn't have to whisper.

"Good girl~," Taika smirked within the darkness. Before you knew it, his lips were on yours and this kiss was much more feral than the last one you received from him. He bit your bottom lip and tugged at it, his nails scraped across your thighs and he shoved his tongue down your throat. He was holding nothing back with you and it made you desperately moan. It was surprising that even the driver wasn't leapfrogging the car all over the place and was managing to keep his cool amidst the sinful sounds you made with only your mouth.

You felt Taika's hand creep up your thigh and to the hem of your panties again. Instead of just tugging them down, he decided to be slow and push them down, all the while feeling up the newly revealed skin.

His lips departed from yours, so you could breathe and also so he could start leaving deep hickeys all across your skin. "You're daddy's little slut, aren't you~? You and that soaked pussy, all just for me~?" He growled and bit harder, causing you to moan out and shake. Upon getting no real response, he grunted and slapped your ass again with his rough palm. "You better answer me, babe~. Otherwise, this can go on all night long~."

You gulped and finally found enough consciousness to nod. "Yes, daddy~," you moaned and you could practically feel the driver shuddering in the front seat.

Taika's strong erection poked at your thigh and he bucked against it from time to time. "Wanna go for a ride baby~?" He purrs to you, against your ear once more once your panties are all the way off and his other hand occupies itself with unclipping your strapless bra, just so he can see your breasts bounce whenever you start your ride.

You nod eagerly and quickly go after his belt, the drool only making your neediness all the more crystal clear. He lets you do your thing, smirking and watching you as you go after his cock like a wild animal. You eventually get his pants down low enough to where his cock springs free and you manage to tear off his suit jacket and tie in the process.

He gripped onto your hips and started guiding you down to his tip whenever the case came to another stop.

"W-We're here, sir..." the man mumbled from the frontseat, quivering, worried about what he just interrupted. Your turned your head to see that the car was now pulled into Taika's driveway. You were disappointed for a moment and a moment only, until Taika grabbed your chin and forced it to face him so you were making intense eye contact with him again.

"Drive." Taika said, his eyes still locked onto yours.

"What?" The man said, nearly forgetting his oath to not turn around and see the scene playing out in the backseat.

"Drive. Around the block or some shit... this won't take me long," Taika growled again, this time harsher. Your throbbing cunt was waiting for him, so you didn't mind. The driver took a moment to register everything before nodding and getting back out on the road again.

The moment the car started to move, Taika's grip intensified, then, he no longer hesitated to let you hover. He full fledged slammed you down on him and you let out your most sinful moan yet of his nickname.

"Yeah~. You like bouncing on daddy's cock, don't you~?" He growled and made you start moving, just to get you going. Once you were at a pace both you and him liked, he slipped his hands from your hips and to your ass, sinking his nails into the soft flesh while the two of you made love in the back of the car. He slapped your ass a couple times. Sometimes, to the point where it was almost beat red. It may have been, if you could see the color through all of the inky blackness surrounding the two of you.

"Fuck~, you're a fucking goddess~," Taika hissed through bared teeth, "Such a tight pussy~. God fucking damn it~."

His sultry moans started to match yours as time passed by and by. Loud, wet slaps of skin on skin and the sounds of your dirty panting filled the car with nothing but disgusting nature. Your hands gripped his shoulders as you were almost positive the back half of the car started to rock beneath the intense amount of force.

"Taika~ You're cock is so fucking perfect~. Fuck~!" You cried out, burying your face in his neck, only to be tugged away by a tough grip on your hair. You hissed, but you went quiet as you looked into Taika's brown eyes that stared into your soul, that dominated you, that owned you and that tight little pussy of yours. All of it was his and he was about to make it cum.

"T-Taika~. I don't know how much longer I can hold~," you moan in his ear as your bouncing becomes a little desperate and a lot rougher, to the point where Taika puts his hands back on your hips to control the wavering speed.

"Beg for it~," Taika said lowly. You could tell he was close too, by the familiar pattern it he pulsation of his cock.

"Please, daddy~. I want this, I need this~. Please, let me cum all over your fucking perfect cock~," you begged him with whatever strength you had left in your body.

"Cum for me," Taika said after a long overdue stare at your bouncing breasts, "do it right fucking now~."

His command was fulfilled in the next few seconds. He felt your juices squirt all down your thighs and a little dribbled onto his pants, but that was alright. He didn't mind one bit.

Now, it was his turn to make his thrusts turn reckless and violent. He shoved himself up into you, panting and moaning your name while he got you over the hills of your scream-filled orgasm. "Where do you want me to cum, doll~?" He growled during the last remaining seconds of his powerful fucking.

"In me~," You begged, wanting to feel him fill you up like the slut you are this time, and you were glad to see that he was happy to oblige. The next thing you knew, you felt strings of hot seed filling your walls and painting you white. That whiteness seeped down your thighs and dripped onto the car seat. The hot stink of sex filled the car and it got to the point where the driver cracked a window, once you two were finished.

Hot damn... you're going to have to make bets with Taika more often...

[wrightiverse]

Hello and this is me annotating/doing director's commentary for the last chapter of Crowd as a victory lap. There's no indulgence like self-indulgence.

“I’ll just make my hot young boyfriend help me,” Robin teases. “When I’m eighty, you’ll only be sixty-nine.”

I love to take a thing from the beginning of a story/scene and revisit it at the end. In this case, 'hot young boyfriend' is a light callback to 'sexy-ass, significantly younger boyfriend' back at the beginning when Robin was sad about the empty nest situation. This is, I think, the first time we specify their exact age gap. It is also the exact age gap I have with my own partner, because I’m very lazy like that. (None of this was written with any reference to what's gone on in the podcast over the last year or so, which is good because it sounds like the whole aging thing for Glenn could have gotten really confusing. Wrightiverse Glenn came back right after Ravenloft, none of that other stuff happened to him. It's all good. Canon is optional.) * * * * *

It’s not like the men in his family have much luck in that area, anyway; Glenn never met either of his grandfathers, and Bill didn’t make it much past fifty.

I think Meryl actually lived for hundreds of years and is still alive in Faerun and they should totally meet, but Glenn doesn’t know all that. * * * * *

Aesthetics aside, it didn't seem like there was much for Glenn to look forward to in middle age and beyond. Nick would grow up and wouldn’t need his dad anymore, and Glenn would be all alone.

From Glenn’s second chapter in Crowd, when Robin is sad about Connor leaving for college:

“I want him to be independent,” Robin is trying to explain into Glenn’s knee, “but also I don’t want to be all alone.” Glenn flicks his ear reproachfully. “You're not all alone. I’m right here, dumbass.”

Sometimes what seems obvious when we're explaining it to somebody else doesn't feel as obvious when it's our turn. Admittedly, Glenn is coming to this with a different set of experiences than Robin is. More on that later. * * * * *

His career would go to shit, because getting old only works for rock stars if they’re actually bluesmen in disguise, like Keith Richards.

I think I got this theory from something Chuck Klosterman wrote, probably Fargo Rock City. * * * * *

He starts his grounding exercise without even thinking about it. Five things he can see: one, an information sign for the city park. Two, a freshly-painted bike rack. Three, some big public art sculpture that looks like a giant rusty hairbrush…

This particular grounding exercise came up earlier in Crowd. I didn't make it up for the story, it's real and many people find that it works well. Feel free to try it! The exercise he alludes to when they’re on the beach, creating ‘safe spaces’ out of vivid memories with lots of sensory details, is also based on a real thing. Lauren, his therapist, is named after the therapist who worked with me on my own PTSD and taught me that and a lot of other good stuff. At least based on my own experience, I can highly recommend EMDR if you can find a good practitioner. * * * * *

It was a hella sweet gesture from the kid.

Connor’s introduction in Name has to do with him carrying shirts past Glenn, and one of those shirts becomes important later to Robin. Given how big the GC3 actually seems to be, I don’t think Connor did the majority of their merch. I assume they used a regular printer and Connor just did small runs of fun custom stuff when he feels like it, meaning not much changed after Glenn quit. * * * * *

Of course, Robin is the only member of the family wearing the shirt right now, because Robin is the only one who doesn’t care that it isn’t cool to wear merch from the gig at the gig itself.

I have no idea how widespread the ‘no wearing merch from the gig at the gig’ thing is, but that’s the rule I learned. * * * * *

Robin is chatting away about something, but it’s hard to follow with all the noise and distraction around them. Glenn decides to let it ride, and allows himself to zone out and just watch Robin talk.

As requested by my brilliant co-author, this is a callback to when Robin spaces out watching Glenn talk on their first date. Both Robin and Glenn are consistently very prone to tuning out when the other one is talking, but neither of them particularly care. As Glenn says on their dinner date - sometimes a man just wants to think out loud for a while and get a ‘hell yeah’ in response. * * * * *

It's vastly unfair that Robin looks so good in direct sunlight, but he probably pulls it off because he's the one person in Los Angeles who isn't trying to look younger than he actually is.

Glenn should spend less time in WeHo. * * * * *

There’s already more gray in Robin’s hair than when they met, although Glenn will only accept partial blame for that. Either way, the old man’s on track to be a full-on silver fox before he even hits fifty.

It felt necessary to drop a reminder that despite how Glenn talks about him, Robin is not actually that damn old. I mean, I'm sure that sounds very old to some of you, but when you're in your mid-to-late 30s like Glenn, somebody in their late 40s is not unreasonably decrepit. I think it has more to do with their respective energies than actual birthdays. * * * * *

“What is it?” Robin has noticed Glenn’s gaze, and he touches his own face to check if there's something on it.

Glenn grins. "Nothing, just ogling."

This is another callback to their first date:

“Do I have something on my face?” Glenn asks, and rubs at his mouth.

“No, you’re good.” Robin says. “You’re great.”

Because I adore a full-circle moment, that's why. * * * * *

“Your eyes were intense," Robin laughs. "It looked like you were going to start growling redrum at me."

This is my own fault for saying in the last chapter that Glenn was rambling about Kubrick moon landing conspiracies when he comes back from his walk. I tried like seven different ways to get them on the subject. I still don’t know if it feels natural. * * * * *

Glenn stabs an accusatory finger toward Robin. “Did you suggest not doing the show because you knew I’d argue with you and talk myself into doing it?”

Can’t outro this story without at least a little argayment.

Glenn usually finds him in the bathroom at the end of the night, looking grumpy about being up past his bedtime and holding some girl’s hair back while she barfs.

With what we've learned about Robin over the course of Crowd, we now have the context to understand that for Robin, this drunk girl is very much the ghost of Christmas Past. I don't imagine he goes to many of these parties.

* * * * *

It doesn’t bother Glenn a bit. Life isn’t a movie, the cheerleader doesn’t have to put on leather pants and start smoking in order to get her bad boy and her happily ever after.

I know that there’s more going on in Grease than that, but consider: would Glenn know that?

* * * * *

He and Robin are very different people, and they always will be. They don’t make sense on the surface, but they both know who they are, and who they are fits together perfectly.

Circling back to Robin at the end of Name, expressing his anxieties:

Robin rests his forehead on the steering wheel, avoiding Glenn’s eyes. “Like I don’t make sense for you, and everybody can see it.”

Some of the circles that I closed in Crowd were ones that were opened in Crowd, but some went back further. * * * * *

Love bubbles up in Glenn like a shaken-up soda, and he finds himself standing up suddenly and grabbing Robin’s shirt collar to tug him down for a kiss.

I wanted to mirror the ‘Hot Dad surges forward to kiss him, hard’ thing from the beginning, but given the established height difference, Glenn can’t just go for it unannounced unless he’s gonna stand tippy-toe. Thank you @whotaughtyougrammar for this art of what happens when Glenn tries the collar-tug and Robin doesn't notice fast enough.

* * * * *

Robin is caught off guard and stumbles half a step back, managing at the last second not to drop his drink. “One second, sweetheart, just one second. You surprised me. What was that about?”

Glenn gives him a lopsided grin. “Luck?”

“Oh, well, then. For luck.”

Luck and how to change it is a big theme throughout the whole series, both in the sense of ‘good fortune/unearned blessings’ and ‘random, unforeseen chance.’ More later about that. * * * * *

When Glenn presses his tongue forward to slip between Robin’s lips, he tastes lemon and sugar.

Same as the first time they kissed, when he’d been drinking whiskey sours.

* * * * *

“Right, yeah,” Robin breathes, but he doesn’t let Glenn out of his arms quite yet. “You know,” Robin adds, “Nick was telling me earlier that he’s going to sleep over at Grant’s tonight.”

So I'll be there when you arrive / The sight of you will prove to me I'm still alive / And when you take me in your arms / And hold me tight / I know it's gonna mean so much tonight * * * * *

She’d found him there, and she'd saved him, like she always did.

We didn’t know Morgan’s name when we first wrote the scene where they discussed her in Name, so we wrote around it as though Glenn was reluctant to name her out loud. We maintained this throughout the rest of Crowd except for the line where Glenn says that he’ll tell Robin about the phone call with Morgan. Felt right. Her presence is very much felt but Glenn, at least, is not in the habit of talking about her unless he has no other option. * * * * *

They ran out of the venue and down the street, hand in hand and giggling like kids playing hooky.

@shrack was the one who began writing our Glenn with very physical methods of showing affection. I liked it a lot as a vibe and carried on with it. He and Morgan are also very young here. Glenn would be 21 or 22 at the oldest, which is barely older than Connor is now. I've always attributed some of his immaturity to the fact that he became a parent pretty young. (Glenn is 36 when Name starts and Nick is 13, meaning Nick was born when Glenn was 23 and probably conceived when Glenn was 22.)

* * * * *

It was like falling in love with every single person in the crowd, all at once. Glenn felt like he would never be lonely again as long as he could have that feeling.

Facing twenty thousand of your friends / how can anyone feel so lonely? * * * * *

By then, the GC3 performed in venues so cavernous that Glenn couldn’t see anything outside his own spotlight. He could hear the audience roar approval at him, making a wall of sound that he could feel like a physical force. It was loud enough to drown out the screaming in his head, loud enough to let him forget that she wasn’t out there among them. It was the closest he could get to forgetting, so Glenn did it as much as he could.

Part of a success that never ends / But I’m thinking about you only... * * * * *

Slowly but surely, he’d been learning how to go through life with his mind and heart focused on someone else’s well-being. It didn’t come naturally: that wasn’t the kind of family either of them knew. Still, they’d promised each other that they could do better than how they were raised.

I am never here for iterations of this dynamic that assume Glenn is the fuck-up and Morgan was the perfect parent. They both became parents at exactly the same moment, you know? The world does not need one more story with an incompetent sitcom dad and his smoking-hot wife who does all the actual parenting. * * * * *

Nick is long since asleep, but Adele fucking Close has stayed up until these sickening hours of the early morning.

Conveniently, Glenn’s brain has overwritten all his memories with the correct name and pronouns for Nick, because writing around it is a pain in the ass otherwise. * * * * *

“Hello, Glenny.”

Bill calling Glenn “Glenny” that time at Ravenloft really stuck with me. I don’t know if they ever revisited that in the actual podcast, but it was so slimy and chilling somehow. * * * * *

“I fucked up,” Glenn says bluntly, and his mother narrows her eyes ever so slightly at his cursing.

Glenn gets in his own head early in Crowd about comparing himself to Penny, and Robin later worries about putting himself on ‘the same level’ as Morgan. Neither of them are quite galaxy-brained enough to realize that there’s more than one person in Glenn’s life who uses a lot of terms of endearment for him, considers themselves old-fashioned, and wishes everybody wouldn’t swear so much. * * * * *

“Thank you, mother,” Glenn grits out. He sounds absolutely nothing like himself, not that she minds. “I appreciate your help.”

I assume that part of the reason Glenn has such a hard time offering genuine apologies is that when he was growing up, too much of his apologizing was forced rather than sincere. * * * * *

“You are out of chances. If you continue to neglect this child, I will get the state involved, and I will take custody myself. I’ve already spoken to the Freemans, and I have their full support.”

Morgan’s parents are not mentioned very often and don’t seem to be a big part of the Close boys’ lives. I imagine that whatever tenuous relationship Glenn had forged with them post-accident was pretty much destroyed by Adele forming this alliance with them and telling Glenn about it. * * * * *

Her patient demeanor is meant to remind him that she's here to clean up his mess again, like she always does, and his proper response is humble and apologetic gratitude.

And that is why Robin being patient can set Glenn off so bad, such as after the bike accident when they were arguing:

Glenn doesn’t really hear most of what Robin’s saying. It’s all just soothing, pointless stuff in that obnoxious tone that means Robin thinks he’s the smart, calm, mature one here and Glenn’s the immature asshole who lost his temper again. He’d never say it, but Glenn can tell what he’s thinking.

I hope it came across clearly in that part that Robin doesn’t actually see the situation that way and isn’t saying or thinking anything to that effect, but Glenn feels like he is because he’s had this somatic/emotional reaction triggered. Spatially he's arguing with Robin, but his body and a lot of his brain thinks he's arguing with his mom. Trauma can be like that. * * * * *

His mother keeps talking like he didn’t say a word. “We can all stay in each others’ lives, Glenny. I’m not trying to cut you out, I’m trying to help you. I know you think I’m a monster, but I’m just trying to do what’s best for my family.”

Sometimes the monster will tell you it's not a monster. * * * * *

From that night forward, Glenn will always know that he’s not a good person, because he almost takes his mother up on the offer.

I don’t think being tempted by this offer means Glenn’s a bad person, but we write Glenn as somebody who wishes he was a good person but is really afraid that he isn’t. He was at a very low point here and he needed help. Feeling drawn to the only help on offer, even if it was from a toxic source, is pretty understandable. * * * * *

"I'll get Nicky ready for school tomorrow and you can sleep in. We’ll finish talking about this when you feel better.”

Man, I hate that abuser thing when they start being sweet as soon as you muster the energy to fight back. You get a little bit of steam built up and then they dodge you like a matador so that it dissipates again. To be clear, Nicky isn't Nick's deadname or anything, it's just the somewhat baby-ish diminutive form that Adele uses for him, like how she calls Glenn "Glenny." * * * * *

“Family is important,” his mother says sadly. Just before she closes the door, she gives him a look that’s an exquisite mix of regret, tender affection, and a tiny spark of hope. Adele would have been a great actress, but Glenn can’t imagine who that particular performance was for.

Performance skills run in the family and Adele comes by her acting chops honestly, although she doesn’t know it. I picture one of those situations where a young woman from a good background gets pregnant by some rakehell actor and her family covers up the scandal by raising the baby as a new sibling. That would mean that as long as Adele’s “older sister” never spilled the beans, nobody in their family at this point knows that they’re related to Meryl. If Nick ever decides to do one of those ancestry DNA tests, things are going to get interesting. * * * * *

He certainly didn’t find it very compelling. Family? All the family he will ever need is sleeping soundly down the hallway, tiny arms wrapped tight around a stuffed plush Babar.

I wanted Nick to have a stuffed animal that was sort of his parallel to Mr. Lion. Robin is drinking with Mr. Lion in the beginning of Crowd when he’s upset about losing Connor to college, and Mr. Lion appears again when Glenn comes in to talk to Nick and Connor after Robin’s accident.

“I… I guess I don’t know.” Nick looks down, avoiding eye contact by staring into the darkness under Connor’s bed. Mr Lion is under there in a clear plastic box, along with some other stuffed animals. Even when Nick first met Connor, the stuffed animals were already banished underneath the bed instead of on top of it. But over the years, Connor’s never thrown them away.

Mr. Lion is one of the various ways we played with the theme that Connor is, as Nick puts it, “somewhere between a kid and an adult.” Connor is a very confident and clever guy, but you don't magically get a giant box of maturity and life experience on your 18th birthday. At various points, he asks both Nick (at the campus concert) and Glenn (after Robin’s accident) to try to understand that he's still growing and figuring stuff out. Nick has definitely been deprived of some chances to be a kid, but in some ways Connor has as well. He started hanging out with Glenn after Penny and Robin split up, and although he and Nick obviously hit it off, Connor was closer to Glenn for a while. In a different universe, that might not have turned out as well - I mean, tell me you wouldn't side-eye that arrangement in real life. I sure would. Robin just sort of flings his hands up at the role Connor plays for the Close boys, but I strongly suspect that shit would not have flown on Penny’s watch.

It’s funny - he thought Connor was so grown-up when they met, but the guy was only 16 when the Wrights moved in next door. He wasn’t much older by the time he was over at the Close place almost every day, helping Nick with homework or cleaning questionable leftovers out of the fridge. It didn’t strike Nick as weird at the time, It was just another thing about his life that wasn’t like anybody else’s. He never questioned what was in it for Connor. Back then, Nick didn’t even realize how lonely he himself was - he wouldn't have figured out why a kid whose parents had just gotten divorced might want to come over to the chaotic Close apartment to get away from the quiet in his own home.

Everybody was doing their best, and everything worked out for the best, but Connor over the course of the stories is sorting out the balance that works for him in terms of responsibility and playfulness. Fortunately, now that he has less responsibility for Nick, he can enjoy Nick more as a friend and brother. In Name, Robin and Glenn both sort of assume Connor will act as a babysitter to Nick while they go off on their first date; by Crowd, Connor is hanging out playing Smash with Nick and Grant as the gents get ready for their dinner date, but he's there socially, as a peer. Him being goofier and more immature also frees up Nick to do the same, since if Connor is cool and Connor is being playful, then "it's not a little kid thing, it's a bro thing" They both get to be kids now in a way that they weren't before, and I love that for them. Anyway, the point of Mr. Lion and why I wanted to give Nick a stuffed animal as well was to draw the parallel between the sons more directly and to anchor the stuffed animal component. So far there hadn't been any moment in which an actual kid was holding an actual stuffed animal.

[bangtancentricsblog]

part of the Smoke Clouds Series 

{adj.} (of a person or their behavior) unconventional and slightly strange

weird neighbor taehyung x grumpy mc

This is my second ever fic for Taehyung, it’s narrative heavy and comes in at around 2.8k and it’s the most I’ve written in a while! It was inspired by Stanley and Sydney’s relationship in Netflix’s ‘I Am Not Okay with This’. It’s unedited and has recreational drug use, Tae smokes weed, Mc has trouble making friends. Features weed dealer Jungkook, I wish I was as witty as I think I am and maybe this would’ve been funnier please let me know what you think! Let me know if I forgot to mention something.

Taehyung was weird, or maybe he was just a happy guy. Either way he made it his sole purpose to annoy you, well at least that’s what you thought. You’d moved into this neighborhood some two years ago, you hadn’t greeted anyone or even bother to introduce yourself. No, you weren’t the ‘I’m new in town and I made cookies’ kind of neighbor. That was the kind of shit people did when they wanted friends in their neighbors, but not you. No you weren’t that nice and you didn’t in fact care if you were friends with the neighbors. Hell you’d be happy if they never spoke to you, except for the fact that Taehyung had happily walked down the road and introduced himself to you. Again he was weird, long locks just hanging in his face as he smiled the weirdest box smile you’d ever seen. He’d been the one to bake something for you as a welcome gift, he didn’t even bat an eye as you said you didn’t want it. He’d only smiled and turned on his heel once again welcoming you to the neighborhood. It’d taken a moment, hands clutching the pyrex filled with cookies to realize he was sans shoes. He was weird. 

It had taken four months, that's right four of him running up to you whenever he’d see you down the street, mud caked to the soles of his feet as he took the shopping bags from you and carried them the rest of the way for him to worm his way into a friendship. It took him no time at all to ask if you wanted to get high with him, something that you had always turned your nose up at but had agreed bringing the snacks from the convenience store with you. The first time you smoke with him he shotguns it to ease you into it, it’s also the start of when you two casually kiss even if not for the benefit of sharing the high. His lips were soft and he was handsome if you took the time to really look and you did when you were high. Through him you meet his dealer, a boy by the name of Jungkook who lives a block from the convenience store you frequent when you're high. Taehyung takes to holding you around the waist when your mind is cloudy from the weed giggles slipping past usually cemented lips. He tells you that you smile more after you’ve smoked, a scowl settling on your lips while you’re still sober. It isn't something you like to think about especially since he’s just your friend. 

He was always smiling you note, even when you would angrily rant about how stupid he was for not wearing shoes when he got sick. He’d choked on his laugh, coughing as he told you how much he loved the feel of nature through his toes. You go to parties together, the people you meet are nice enough but none of them like you. Except for Jungkook with his bambi eyes and bunny smile who takes to holding your hand and dragging you around when Taehyung is busy with other people. You’re not jealous, because why would you be? You aren't his girlfriend and he has more friends than just you, he shouldn't have to sacrifice his fun to make sure you're enjoying yourself. Jungkook asks you if you want to smoke with him and you say yes, you’re taking a slow drag from the blunt when another person comes up and asks for a hit. You hand it over narrowing your eyes at the girl who’s standing beside you, she’s pretty dark head of hair shining in the moonlight her eyes twinkling with mirth as she meets your gaze. She introduces herself as Lisa, a friend of Jungkooks and you smile softly, she's nice enough she makes you laugh but you don’t see yourself becoming her friend. 

He’s wearing shoes the day he asks you why you hate people. He doesn’t ask to be mean and you don’t think he really cares all that much, he’s just curious. You’re brows furrow lips pressed in a firm line, quite honestly you don't want to tell him why. He doesn’t need to know and it’s been almost 8 months of your friendship so you don't want to see him change because of you. So you don't say anything and instead change the topic to Jungkook who you saw at the convenience store buying a large slushie and scowling at the microwave. He doesn’t ask again just laughs as he tells you how the other boy has been feuding with the thing since he was a kid. He shares some of his own childhood stories and they’re funny so you laugh but there’s no real humor to it. You two smoke later that day making out as you’re perched in his lap. The fuzziness of your brain lulling any of the thoughts that has managed to surface from your earlier conversation. 

You’ve been ‘friends’ nearly a year when you hurt his feelings. He didn't push really, never brought up why you hated people again. So you don’t really know why you reacted the way you did, he’d been standing in his yard (sans shoes but that was normal now) hands tucked into his pockets as Lisa giggled up at him. He smiled down at her that soft dopey smile he wore whenever he was higher than a kite. The one you had thought was reserved only for you, but maybe he was just that kind of guy. Sure you kissed and smoked together but nothing else has happened. He didn't call you his girlfriend and you didn't call him your boyfriend, you went to parties together sure but nothing happened. It was a stagnant, comfortable place, one that you had happily kept near and dear. One that you didn't think would ever be something you’d have to give up. You see him turn smile so wide as he catches sight of you and leaves Lisa to come join you down the road. You’ve come from the doctors today, and even though he doesn't know it's hard to not want to be mean to him. 

You hadn’t meant it, the words that had come from you burned like acid on your tongue. The look of utter hurt that crossed his features as you spat the nastiest things at him made you want to crumble. You’d managed to take all the things you liked about him and twist them into the most horrible things you could possibly think of. His smile had fallen eyes shining with tears as he looked at his feet suddenly shy and then nodded his head once before bolting away from you. Lisa had scowled at you as she walked past, shoulder checking you and calling you an asshole. You couldn’t have agreed more, so you continued your walk to your house mind rampant with thoughts of a weird boy with a box smile. 

It's been almost a month since you’ve last spoken to Taehyung, not that you would want to either if you were in his position. He avoids you as best as he can, you’ve seen him just up the road when you come from a late night walk to the convenience store. He looks tired, not much like himself, or at least the version of himself you know. You don’t go out much anymore either, Jungkook glares at you when he sees you and you understand. It’s not much but Jungkook was the only person that you actually liked and considered a friend besides Taehyung. It's considerably harder to get through the day, especially when you used to spend it smoking with Taehyung and Jungkook won't sell you any weed now that he also isn't speaking to you. All in all you miss your friends, the ones you made here in this new town that was supposed to be a new start. The sun is shining through the blinds in your living room as you lay on the couch the tv on but nothing catches your attention. The newest season of Castlevania plays and it's one of Netflix’s best animated shows yet, or at least to you it was. You had planned to watch it with Taehyung since you both shared an open admiration for Richard Armitage and his role as Trevor Belmont. You’re on episode eight which means you spent the entire time staring blankly at the screen none of what has happened enough to distract you from how badly you had fucked everything up. 

The pyrex from all those months ago sat on your kitchen table empty and clean ready to be returned but seemingly forgotten. You missed him, missed his dopey smile, his deep chuckle, the soft way he kissed you, the slow drawl to his voice when he was higher than a fucking kite. You missed Taehyung and you wanted to go back to how it was before you had burned down that bridge of friendship and maybe something else. You rose slowly, ass now firmly planted on the couch cushion as your hands rubbed at your jean clad legs. It took you a couple of minutes, well more like a few months but you’d come to a shocking conclusion. Taehyung, the same guy who almost never wore shoes, the one who smoked as much as he laughed. Taehyung whose boxy smile was the highlight of your day, who held you tenderly and kissed you softly. Taehyung who had introduced you to Jungkook, who loved animals and drank too much coke. Taehyung who you had been rude to upon introduction, but had baked you cookies anyways was quite possibly the best thing to happen to you your entire life, and you now had come to realize you were completely in love with. The same Taehyung who probably hated you, the one who you made cry and all because you had seen him smile at someone else. God you were the worst, you wanted to cry just thinking about all the mean things you had said. Maybe you could make it up to him somehow, maybe you could bake him something and show him how sorry you are and how much you miss him. 

Two hours later you’re pulling a less than appealing cake from your oven. It seemed simple enough on the box, so why the hell does it look like this. It's at this very moment that you realize that you are a terrible baker, and an even worse human.

“Oh god what the fuck.” you mutter hands on the counter as you wonder if he’ll like it. You suck it up and hope for the best, the worst that can happen is you fuck it up and he tell you he never wants to see you again. Guys like big gestures, right? To be honest you’re not entirely sure but you hope he does. You’re nervous as you wipe your hands on your jeans and make your way down the road to his house. Halfway there you stop turning back only to keep moving towards his house, its nerve wracking. Never had you had feelings like this for someone and never had you fucked up this bad. You’re standing in front of his door the paint looking just as it had almost a month ago. Except here and now he’s not standing there smiling down at you and inviting you in for your daily smoke session. It feels like forever just standing here now that you managed to sift through your thoughts and came to the conclusion that you had feelings for him. Yet you know nothing will change if you don't gather enough strength to make your limbs move and knock. 

A sound comes making your eyes grow wide as you realize that you’ve just knocked and are currently still knocking on his door. All the blood rushes from your face when you realize maybe now isn't the best time to try and reconcile with him. The sun is setting quickly and you haven't had enough time to prepare what you want to say to him. Your heart beats in your chest hard enough that you hope it bruises something, maybe then you’ll have time to thoroughly think this through. You’re ready to book it hands gripping tightly onto the pyrex container to make sure it doesn’t fall and break as you run for it, only you can’t run because the door opens. The light is low with Frank Sinatra floating softly through the air, your eyes are wide as they take in Taehyung. He's not smiling for one but his hair is longer curling at the ends and hanging in his face. He's wearing a black button up tucked into a very tight very appealing pair of black jeans, the top two buttons of his shirt are undone flashing that bit of caramel skin you loved seeing. 

He’s dressed like he went into the office today whereas he usually works from home and suddenly you feel all the more ready to flee. Though you see a glimmer of curiosity flicker through his gaze and that's what keeps you planted where you are. He quirks a brow and it's now that you notice the two of you have been standing awkwardly staring at one another. You clear your throat first before you thrust the pyrex container towards him and ducking your head. 

“I made this for you.” you breath the words so quietly you aren’t sure he even heard you. The container leaves your hands and you hear the lid come off followed by a distressed sound. You’ve taken to gnawing on your lip as you try to formulate other words. 

“What is this exactly?” 

“Devil's food cake, sorry if it tastes like shit its from a box.” 

“Oh,” he says sounding mildly confused and maybe because the half charred half undercooked treat is terrible. You still cant comprehend how the hell you managed to fuck it up like that “wow you are so bad at this.”and you perk up slightly because you can just barely make out a sliver of mirth in his tone. 

“I, I wanted to um, I uh, well…”you sputter trying your hardest to form a proper sentence. Though you notice you sound more like a bumbling babbling baboon. You meet his stare hoping that he knows, that he can tell what you’re trying to say. He has beautiful eyes you note, still trying to make your feelings known. He just waits patiently a small smile lining his lips the longer you stand trying to come up with the words to tell him. He watches as you gesture with your hands, opening and closing your mouth multiple times as your features slowly grow more and more frustrated. You’re huffing now scowl growing the longer you take to form words that will hopefully get your feelings across. Nothing comes, and you’re just about ready to cry and leave. Tears shine in your eyes blurring your vision a sob crawling its way up your throat in an attempt to flee. It doesn’t come however as Taehyung's warm palms cup your cheeks thumbs swiping just under your eyes and catching the tears that clung to your lashes. The pyrex container is out of sight as he leans forward pressing his lips to yours in a kiss. 

It's soft, softer than when you first kissed and softer than all the others after that. He slants his lips slightly kissing you with just the press of your lips and nothing more. It frees the butterflies in your tummy, and your hands come up to grasp onto his belt loops. Anything really that will reassure you that this is real, that he is here and he is real. He pulls away eyes meeting yours once more, “I’m sorry,” you say and he smiles pressing his forehead to yours “i didn't mean any of what i said. I want you to know that.” 

“I know, and it's okay.”

“It's not, I’m sorry. I never want to hurt you like that.” you whisper now tears filling your eyes again. 

“I know, and i already forgave you.”

“I like you.” you blurt wishing you had waited. His eyes crinkle as his box smile kisses his lips, he pulls away hand turned up in an offering for you to take. 

“Do you want to come in and smoke?” You take his hand nodding and walking in behind him. Your perched on his lap two hours later arms wrapped around his neck mind blissfully fuzzy from the weed. His lips are soft, and he’s just as beautiful as you remember, his arms are around your waist holding you close as you take your time kissing him. He groans every now and then when you take to nipping at the skin of his neck, eyes hazy with that far away he gets. You’ve pulled away from his neck taking in a blooming blemish that’ll be vibrant come morning when he says, “I like you too.” mouth already quirked in a smirk when he sees your eyes shine as you pull him into another kiss that's too much tongue and teeth but perfect.

✧✧✧✧✧✧

taglist:

 @boymeetsweevil look I did something and even if it’s unedited I really like it!

[rocketmanmadden]

Señorita

Requested by @queenstark3000

Could you do a request using the song Señorita with Richard please??

Warnings-light smut, intended sex

A/N- I hope this is what you wanted! I’ve never done a song request before and this was actually quite tough for me to get the hang of and write so I hope you enjoy!

Big shoutout to my friend @primaba11erina for giving me ideas and taking the time to help me get this request completed when I was really stuck on how to do a song request. I can’t thank you enough!

You swayed to the music as you held your drink, finally feeling free. Free to be yourself and not worrying about your ex-boyfriend, going to clubs and enjoying life as you weren’t allowed to do before.

You noticed a man, who you’ll learn at some point that his name is Richard, gazing at you, watching your smile all the way down to the sway of your hips, admiring all of your features that he found so perfect on this girl who he doesn’t even know. He wanted to get to know you, find out all of your thoughts and likings, but what he wanted more than that at this moment, and it was probably because of the alcohol in his system, was your body against his. He just needed to approach you and wait for the perfect song.

Richard bit his lower lip and walked over to where you are. “Ah, the pretty boy has finally decided to use his words instead of his eyes” you say jokingly with a giggle. "Well I must say, you are beautiful. Any chance you’d let me buy you a drink and talk for a bit?" Richard smiles as he directed his eyes to the area where the drinks are served.

A big grin appeared on your face, "Thank you, you're not so bad yourself." You said as you looked into his eyes. “I’d love for you to buy me a drink” you tell him and the two of you make your way to the bar. 'He has to be carved by the gods’ you thought to yourself as you glance over at him while he orders drinks. ‘Hot , sweet, and interested in me? This must be my lucky day’ you gush inside your head.

“So tell me about yourself, what’s a pretty girl like you doing here all by yourself?” he asks after handing you your drink. “My boyfriend dumped me, it wasn’t that great of a relationship so I'm not too bothered. Booze is better than boys anyways” you explain and he pretends to be offended. “Ouch, booze is better than me?” he gasps. “I might just have to take that drink away from you” he chuckles. “You’re not a boy, silly. You’re a man. At least you seem like it” you inform him as the song changes and a new one comes on.

‘This is the song’ Richard immediately thinks to himself, but he soon found out you had the same exact thoughts.

"Oh I love this song! Would you maybe like to dance?" you ask, suddenly feeling brave. "Shouldn't I be asking you that?" Richard teased and you giggled.

Richard held his hand out for you and you gladly took it as he led the two of you to the dance floor.

You placed your arms around his neck and his hand went to your waist, pulling you up against his body as the song ‘Señorita’ blares through the speakers.

The feeling of being this close to a handsome stranger was exciting. Maybe you were desirable, maybe you were everything your ex said you weren’t. It felt so natural to dance with him and to have him in your arms.

The way you guys were grinding on each other, touching each other, made electricity shoot through both of your veins. Richard knew that you could feel how much he wanted you, and you knew he could feel how much you wanted him.

“I love it when you call me señorita

I wish I could pretend I didn't need ya

But every touch is ooh la la la

It's true, la la la

Ooh, I should be running

Ooh, you keep me coming for you

Land in Miami

The air was hot from summer rain

Sweat dripping off me

Before I even knew her name, la la la

It felt like ooh la la la

Yeah no

Sapphire moonlight, we danced for hours in the sand

Tequila sunrise, her body fit right in my hands, la la la

It felt like ooh la la la, yeah”

Your body was in his hands, everything touching everywhere. Hot and heavy on the dance floor practically living off each other’s air. It wasn't even until you heard the lyric you realized you didn’t even know his name.

“So what’s your name?” You whisper in his ear as you guys continue dancing, moving your hands and bodies all over each other. “Richard, and yours?” He whispers back. “Y/N” you state. “Hot name for a hot girl” he chuckles before the two of you go silent again dancing harder than before.

“All along I've been coming for you

And I hope it meant something to you

Call my name, I'll be coming for you

Coming for you, coming for you, coming for you

For you

For you

Ooh, I should be running

Ooh, you keep me coming for you”

As the song finished, Richard leaned down and captured your lips in a hungry and lust filled kiss. Your hands tangled themselves in his hair as his hands drifted down your back to your ass. The heat between the two of you was undeniable, even a person with no sight would be able to tell that you were hot and heavy for each other.

You both broke apart panting. "Let's get out of here” Richard says and you immediately agree. He took your hand and you guys ran outside, hailing a cab and going to his place.

Once there, Richard pinned you against the wall and assaulted your neck with sloppy kisses. You lightly moaned at the feeling of his tongue gliding across your hot skin. "Bedroom?" Was all was you were able to say.

He picked you up and carried you to his bed. He kicked his room door shut and ripped your clothes off fast, as well as his own. When the clothes were a heap, he tossed you onto the bed gently, causing her to giggle, as he climbed over and got on top of you.

Let’s just say after everything that happened that night, you’ve never related to a song lyric more than “Call my name, I'll be coming for you, ooh, you keep me coming for you” from the song Señorita, which was the start to a new amazing relationship and an incredible, in many different ways, boyfriend.

[aspiratinganxiety]

If you're still taking requests could u do the lounging around on a lazy day w the batboys hc thank u ilysm:)

I love you so much too and oh my GOD. This prompt has been waiting here forever. Like, literally forever. I am so sorry. Please forgive my overlooking this gem for so long. 

I hope that it’s worth the wait…

Tag List: @nxttime​, @possiblyelven​​, @thepuckishrogue​, @jinkies-its-a-writer, @queeniepearls​ (If you want to be tagged, let me know! For more fics, check out my masterlist.)

Dick:

-Dick Grayson isn’t really one for being lazy all day long. He can do a lazy morning filled with cuddling or a lazy afternoon comprised of catching up on a few episodes of that series you’ve been trying to get him to watch for the last 6 months. He’s even happy to tuck in for an evening of cheesy movies and junk food too, on an occasional basis. 

-Largely though, he’s got too much energy to just stay cooped up for the entirety of a day.

-This means that lazy time spent basking in Dick’s company is a rarity. When you both have the day off, he likes to go and do things! He plans dates and day trips. He looks up expos and events, conventions and kitschy get-togethers where he can finally meet all of your friends and show off his incredible people skills. 

-There are a million places he’d love to show you, and a whole 24 hours of uninterrupted quality time should be used bonding over shared activities; not… inactivities. 

-In his opinion. 

-You disagree.

-When the Richard is sufficiently socialized and gallivanted, he makes for an excellent domestic partner. He can chill with the best of them, amiable to most endeavors of cuddling, television watching, or video gaming. 

-Ultimately, your requests for lounging around the home take place either before or after his scheduled outings. Therefore, because you’re so willing to spend your time doing what he thinks will be fun, he’s 100% happy to return the favor and weigh in on any dramatic reality TV series or sappy romantic films.

-If it makes you happy and doesn’t make him jittery or cross, he’s down to give you your way.

Jason:

-Listen. I argue that Jason, in spite of being so bold and charismatic, is largely introverted. After a hard mission or a bad fight with family, all he wants is to come home and curl up in his bed with a good book and some quality solitude.

-When the opportunity to spend the day doing nothing but hanging out with you and a well worn pair or sweatpants presents itself, he jumps for it. 

-Like. 

-This is his favorite.

-After the first few trial runs, all the kinks get worked out and the two of you find a good rhythm of relaxed inactivity. 

-You don’t even talk to one another all that much! You just get it. He just gets it. You throw on something mindless like an instrumental playlist or a series you’ve both seen a million times and read. Sometimes you watch something he’s seen before while he catches up on mild casework. Other times you nap on the couch with your head on his shoulder, and he wonders how he got so lucky and frets about not screwing things up. 

-Whatever it is that the two of you end up doing on your quiet days together, Jason decompresses. He breaths, and sleeps, and eats all of the ways he’s supposed to. He holds you close, and he’s grateful for your patience and willingness to have such calm and unobtrusive expectations.

Tim:

-At first, you were pretty sure that Tim never went a single day without working.

-Like, to the tune of Taylor Swift, Never-Ever-Ever

-It was only after you’d discovered his alter ego and been initiated into more mild outskirts data mining operations of vigilantism that he actually allowed himself to be completely open about his schedule and confirm your suspicions about his utter lack of self-care. 

-Boy howdy, did you ever-ever-ever put a stop to that.

-Your boyfriend is a logical man. It was simple enough to rope him into a verbal agreement about post-case recuperation that you then brandished against him as though it were a legally binding contract.

-After a big case gets cleared out, no matter what else is on the board, you text the team to let them know they’re on their own for tech support and snuggle in for a good day of nerdy self-indulgence that sets your heartstrings thrumming in time with the narrative fascinations you share along with Tim.

-Hours of Star Trek, Hannibal, Game of Thrones, or any other delectable series that happens to be buzzing at the time of your 24 hour vacation gets binged with content abandon.

-You snuggle on the couch, limbs flopped listlessly over one another under mountains of plush throw blankets and pillows that have been pillaged from your bedroom and commandeered for the betterment of the couch.

-Lazy days with Tim are full on. No cooking. No cleaning. 

-Just binge-watching good shows, making dorky jokes, and loving up on your overworked boyfriend. 

Damian:

-The concept of lazing about was also just… not really a thing here.

-Meditation? Yeah. Low activity reconnaissance? Sure thing. Enjoying a few moments of peace to gather oneself before or after engaging in taxing mental/social/emotional activities? Granted.

-Spending an entire day loafing around the house without even bothering to get dressed properly? 

-Are you fucking serious?

-This boi straight up rejected your pleas for a low-key day of blissful nothingness until his femur was shattered. No joke. 100%. 

-It took serious damage to his structural integrity to get your boyfriend to spend 5+ hours on the couch with you. 

-It was then that Damian realized the true joy of being lazy with a partner. There’s no stress. No obligation. No pressure to perform or characterize his behavior beyond noncommittal commentary when so inspired or pressed. He could just be there, with you, collecting himself and enjoying his home and pets as he so chooses with little to no judgement. 

-The deep relaxation and trust that he fostered for you during the time you spent caring for him during his recovery changed his opinion of allowing you to stay overnight without a measured schedule. 

-Without meaning to, he sort of fell into preferring for you to be in his space, if not his direct proximity, during all of his time off. 

-He’ll be in the study brushing up on a Slavic dialect that’s gotten rusty in the back of his mind, and you’ll be tucked into a fleece robe on the couch with Titus flipping through a magazine or watching a movie. And it’s nice.

-Sometimes he’ll be doing maintenance on his vast collection of weapons and antiques, and you’ll be right beside him watching with rapt attention, veritably simmering with questions about each and every unique piece. He is especially fond of these instances.

-When you and Damian share a quiet day together, he likes to cultivate something. Whether it’s in your knowledge of antiquities or his vocabulary of slang and pop-culture references, keeping you near while he gets some much needed relaxation always leaves him feeling more accomplished than lazy.       

[cncobaby222]

Kissing on my tattoos

Authors note: I’m back with another story !!! Now this story started one way but i kept rewriting and finally got it how I wanted it . This is also based on the song by August Alsina called kissing on my tattoos

Warnings: none

Word count:1216

Kissing on me

Kissing on me

Kissing on me

Kissing on me

Baby I don't blame you

For being in the clubs

Getting all that love

Because you're so beautiful

God made you to show that off, oh

Now I ain't ever been the jealous type of guy

But I want you to myself, I can't lie

I know we ain't on no one on one thing

But baby, It should change

Cause when I be out with other chicks I be thinking bout you

And when you be out on dates you be texting me too

Telling me to come pick you up when he drop you off

I pray to God he ain't breaking you off

You and Richard have always been close but what you didn’t know is how he felt about you, he was always there for you when you really needed him. All the dates you went on, he was there to make sure the guy wasn’t a creep he always told you he wasn’t the jealous but you never really believed him, you sit there in deep thought thinking about your friend and your feelings you finally zone back in to hear him talking to you “ Y/n Are you even listening to me?” “ huh What? “ “Nevermind but are you ready for your date?” “ yeah but promise me you’ll be nice to this one i know how you can get.” He just looks at you as the doorbell rings, you laugh and shake your head and walk to the door “ hey are you rea-.. Oh i didn’t know you had company ” “he’s just my best friend i’m ready.” You turn to look at richard and see him staring daggers at your date walk over to him and hug him “richard i’ll see you later” he hugs you back “ text me if you need me” you pull away and smile as you walk out of the door you grab your dates hand “ so you and him must be pretty close huh?” “ yeah hes my bestfriend” “he looks at you like he’s in love with you” you laugh but you know that could never happen as much as you want it too as you guys arrive to the restaurant you get a text from richard saying “i hope he’s treating you right if not then ima beat his ass” you smile and text back” youre such a dork lol” you put your phone away you couldn’t help but feel butterflies when he texted you that. You and your date are sitting there eating not really talking and its really awkward between you guys and you feel your phone vibrate but you ignore it you look up at your date and smile he smiles back and ask you “ So after this are we going back to my place after this ? You kind of just looked him very surprised he asked you that considering it’s your first date you excuse yourself and say you have to go the bathroom and pull your phone your out and text richard asking him to come get you he texts back instantly “ what happened. Are you okay?” “ yeah i’m fine but come get me” he tells you hes on the way. You walk back out to your date and tell him that you started feeling sick so you’re going to head home he looks at you “oh okay i can drive you home” “ No it’s okay Richard is coming to get me” “ Of Course he is, enjoy your night y/n.” you walk outside to see richard getting out of his car “ y/n are you okay?” “ yeah i’m okay please just take me home” as you are driving back home you feel richard put his hand on your thigh you looked down and smile. As you arrive at your house you look over at richard and say “ thank you for coming to get me. I guess you were right about him.” “y/n i- nevermind i’m glad you’re okay” “ do you wanna stay with me tonight” little did you know richard was hoping you asked him to stay just so he could hold you close to him. “ i would love to”

I don't want nobody but you

Kissin' on my tattoos

I don't want nobody but me

Talkin to you

Until you fall asleep

We better stop playing (We better stop playing game)

Before we mess around and someone gets hurt

I don't want nobody but you (nobody but you)

Kissin' on my tattoos

All my homies wanna know what's up with us

They can't believe that I'm kicking it with just one girl

But I'm cool with that

Them pretty eyes and that smile

Girl I'm a fool for that (yeah I'm a fool for that)

Cause when I be out with other chicks I be thinking bout you

And when you be out on dates you be texting me too

Telling me to come pick you up when he drop you off

I pray to God he ain't breaking you off

A couple days later you go with richard to the studio and hang with the rest of the guys as your siting in the studio and you hear chris ask him “ so what’s going on with you and y/n?” “ That’s my best friend but like i don’t know man my feelings for her are stronger than just us being friends” “you should just tell her bro” you look over to the boys talking and you see richard smile at you. You want to tell him how you feel and you want to be able to kiss him but its hard for you. You walk over to richard and he just smiles and pulls you closer “ hey rich can i talk to you for a sec?” “ yeah i’ll be back guys” you see chris grin and nod towards you guys then whisper something to erick you just laugh and shake your head as you guys walk outside and sit on the bench “ look i need to tell you something and it’s kind of been bothering me for a while” “ whats up babygirl? Actually before you say anything i love you, you’re all i think about. I honestly can’t stand that you aren’t mine and that i can’t hold you every night.” you sat there speechless because you never knew felt like that and you could tell by the look on his face he was trying to read your expression. You look up at him and kiss him, you kind of caught him off guard but he slowly started kissing you back. You slowly pull away “ rich i didn’t know you felt like that i was going to tell you that you all i ever think about but i guess we are on the same page” you laugh a little bit he just looks at you and kisses you again and you smile into the kiss and ask him what does this mean and he just chuckles” Well you are mine and thats it and if anyone has a problem can take it up with me.” You just smile and hug him. Your day just got better because you finally got the man of your dreams.

Nobody But you

Kissing on me

Kissing on me

[ringobean]

New fanfic on wattpad:

"I wanna be your man"

Butlins Camps part1

August 1960, finally the end of the school year, after a long exhausting year, finally came holiday time.

As I had really succeed in my exams and my year, my parents had promised to let me go on holiday with three of my friends for one month, they were a little worried about seeing me go on vacation alone, in a holiday camp, with a lot of young people, especially young men, but they trusted me, I was a pretty serious girl, who spent her time reading rather than flirting. But this time I really wanted to enjoy, laugh with my friends, and why not meet a boy to have fun during the holidays, and my friends who was really more experimented as me, wanted to make me cut loose during this month.

One of my friend had booked a bungalow for a month at Butlin's Pwllheli, it was a holiday camp near Pwllheli in Wales, the guy she fancied, was playing over there in a band, and she was determined to have him! It wasn't a dreaming destination , but the camp looked nice, there was a large swimming pool, full of activities, and in the evening concerts and dancing parties, and the price wasn't very expensive for a month. For the occasion, I bought a collection of sexy bikini and pretty summer dresses, obviously my parents had no idea of it.

While I was waiting for my friend to pick me up by car, my parents gave me their last recommendations, especially my mother:

"My dear daughter, take care of yourself, you know boys are real predators, and will do anything to sleep with you, try to protect your virginity for your futur husband, darling!"

"Mum, please, i know... It's so odd to talk about this with you. Now i got to go, my friends is here, i promess i'll stay well behave, and won't do stupid things, you know me, i'm a good girl."

I kissed them, and rush into the car of my friend, that her father bought her to celebrate the success of her exam.

We all laughed, and we spent the trip listening to music, and chatting about all the things we were going to do!

"come on girls, let's go for the holidays, we're going to have fun! And who's gonna sleep with the handsome Rory all summer, it's me!"

We unpacked our belongings and don't waste time changing into bikini to enjoy the pool. I opted for a superb pink and white gingham bikini highlighting my chest and legs, with a matching headband. Then we went to the pool, the water was good and warm, after a few minutes of swimming, we were going to dry and sunbathe on the deckchairs, I started to read a book, while the girls were looking for boys, especially Betsie who was absolutely looking for her Rory, I had no idea who he was and his band, since I hardly have time to go out, spending the majority of the year to study. I was so absorbed in my book, that I hadn't noticed the group of boys who had approached us.

After two hours on the road, we finally arrived, a young woman at the reception made us visit the camp by explaining everything to us, then led us to our bungalow.

A deep baritone sensual male voice with a strong liverpool accent, got my head out of my book.

"Hi, i hope that i'm not bothering you? Can I sit next to you?"

"no, of course you can"

He gave me a charming smile, he wore only a very small swimsuit, he didn't look very tall, he was thin but slightly muscular, arms and thighs very toned, large hands with rings on his fingers, he had a fine face, big blue eyes, a luscious mouth, a masculine aquiline nose, beautiful fluffy wavy hair that looked soft! I blush, not knowing where to put my eyes. He was very attractive, and he was quite the kind of boy my parents dreaded!

"I'm Richard, but you can also call me Ritchie or Ringo"

"Nice to meet you, I'm (Y/N), Ringo?"

"Yes my bandmates call me like that cause of my rings."

"are you a musician?"

"a little bit, I studied it at school, I dream to go to Paris one day!"

"yes, I'm the drummer of the band "Rory storm and the Hurricanes" What were you reading?"

"oh a french book, by Boris Vian, it's very poetic, but a little bit weird!"

"I also like to read when I have time, do you speak french?"

"Me too, maybe we'll can go there one day together?"

"yeah, maybe, who knows!" i giggles.

"do you want to drink something?"

I felt so silly blushing and giggling like an idiot every time he spoke to me, but he was such a handsome guy.

"Yes, why not!"

He comes back a few minutes later with two bottles of coke and a straw for me, meanwhile Betsie was already busy flirting with Rory and my 2 other friends wading in the water, having fun splashing with boys. He took a sip from his bottle and asked me:

"I've already seen your friends at our concerts, but you, it's the first time that I see you, where were you hiding?

"Yeah i can see that, he said, watching Betsie getting groped, on Rory's lap.

I was sipping my coke from the end of my straw.

"Actually, I don't go out much the rest of the year..."

"Oh too bad, but it doesn't matter we'll catch up on time! How long are you staying here?"

"all August"

"so we'll definitely have time to get to know each other better!"

"yes, I hope it would be nice ..."

"will you come and see us play tonight?"

"yes of course, especially knowing that my friends are totally fan of your band"

I was very happy and quite worried at the same time, to have come across a boy who I liked, but who also seemed to be a womanizer...

I laughed.

"you have something planned after the concert, maybe we could spend time together?"

"uh.. no... nothing planned yet."

I had butterflies in my stomach at the idea of spending time alone with him, totally excited and frightened at the same time, never having really gone out with a boy, especially a boy who seemed really experienced, and who attracted me.

"you're cute when you blush"

My god i just wanted to kill myself for being so stupid and shy...

"Thanks"

"So, see you tonight, pretty (y / n) we have to prepare for the concert!"

He gave me a kiss on the cheek and left with his bandmates...

Maggie said to me laughing:

"Well what a chance, great for the first day, you caught a beautiful fish, he's the one that I wanted, Girls says that he has the biggest of all, and he make love very well, but he choose you... At least, Johnny is great too!

"I'm not aware of what girls says about him, anyway he looks very nice and charming"

I was very happy and quite worried at the same time, to have come across a boy who I liked, but who also seemed to be a womanizer...

[dzpenumbra]

10/25/22

Welp, I finally pulled the trigger and smoked for the first time in like... a week or more. The time passed went real quick. I guess I still have most of my tolerance because I was using the tincture at night, but the high with that is suuuuper subtle, very different. I'm definitely feeling it, even though I only smoked like half a hit tonight. Didn't wanna get obliterated. And I smoked a mix of the two hybrids. So it's a nice kinda energetic but still glowy kinda high. I'm still pretty sleep deprived so I wanted to play it "safe", I'm noticing that I'm much more prone to freakouts when I'm stressed and sleep-deprived.

But I feel good right now, which is overdue and earned. I started the morning with a text from my dad, who has been giving me advice on my business by quoting Warren Buffett and Richard Branson (I think?) to me. You know, two very well-known successful self-employed solo multimedia artists... Not two elderly billionaires...

Apparently the problem with my art business is that I am bad at "marketing and communication". Not that I have no social media presence, no friends, no clients and literally no one even asks me what I'm working on or shows half an interest in my libraries of past projects. And the worst part, I said this to him verbatim. Maybe a 2 page text is just too fucking long for people to read and retain the information. Maybe they just skim looking for key words, something that confirms their biases. Then they start writing their own 2 page thesis to complete the cycle. What a waste.

I was on the fence about reopening this can of worms. It's clearly not good. I just start the day with a critique of my life. Not with questions to learn more details, not with offerings of assistance or contribution, but with unsolicited criticism and analysis. Like my life is an interesting article he found and wants to study until it bores him. He's not the only one I've known that's done this, a lot of people do this. It's... well... it's decimating. It destroys your sense of self-worth, it makes you a paranoid wreck, you start questioning your own perceptions of reality. At least I do. But I'm a very romantic, imaginative type, so... maybe I shouldn't speak in generalities, but if you're anything like me this is what it does.

I got a bit upset. I asked him what he was offering. He withdrew, saying he was just going to offer his theories, and then ran off to lunch and essentially hung up on a text conversation. I couldn't be fuckin bothered, I went about my day. But I left a message there that I might send him an unsolicited critique of his business, see how that goes over sometime.

Ugh. Enough of that, lets go on to something more positive - drugging my cat and bringing her to get her blood drawn. Yay! So... I got Max her meds after the text stuff. Put it in chicken. She was really doped up in the AM, like... wobbly on her feet, barely awake, bumping into things. It's always hard. With Cerry it was easier to just go "yeah, she's just really high right now" because Cerry was much more laid back and bubbly. Max was just... fucked up. And clearly very fucked up. Like I was afraid the dose might have been too high. But yeah, kinda went a little helicopter parent with that one. We did have some fun with it eventually. But I got the meds to her around the time window needed. I got her to the vet. She was great, barely even flinched or pulled. Got the blood first try. It went great. I got some stuff for her gingivitis to put in her food, even more supplements. I'm sure she'll get used to it in time.

We got home. My mom and I talked in the driveway for like... an hour or something. It was helpful, she's on the same page as me now on a lot of stuff, and it's really helping me not feel batshit crazy. When everyone just treats you like "oh making art is easy", "oh starting your own business with no help and no friends is easy", "i have no idea why you would be struggling with this", "you just need to try harder" Stupid, ignorant, lazy, ill-informed shit like that. When you get nothing but that, you (well... I) start to question reality. I wrote it on my whiteboard like 2+ years ago in red ink - Stockholm Syndrome.

I think it might be one of my big blindspots. Where I kinda just default to "well they probably know what they're talking about, I should defer to their judgment". Like "doctor's orders". I don't know how to define it... but if I'm surrounded by the deprecating opinions of someone that I consider a friend - someone bonded, who I trust and defer to for perspective - then I often start questioning my own perspective, in an effort to grow, optimize and improve. And I just sorta absorb their contradicting information, assuming truthfulness, because what reason would anyone have to lie to my goddamn face? Why would anyone put on the mask of a friend, lover or family member and use that costume to lower my defenses and earn my trust - only to hide their true self, and use it for their own personal amusement?

Maybe I'm naive, maybe I'm a dreamer. But I feel like a big part of being a good person yourself is to give others the benefit of the doubt that they are works in progress as well. That we're all constantly in flux, and learning every day. Well.... at least we are all capable of growing and working on ourselves every day. I truly do believe that. My faith is rooted in it. That even a wild coyote or shark has a heart, and is capable of learning. Okay... well a shark might be a good analogy for the shit I must be missing, because I'm looking at that again and going... well... a shark is always going to be a shark...

So with wild dogs, totally, you can get them to come around. I believe that about domestic dogs too. I try really hard not to question my faith with that. I'm sure with some they're just so deeply traumatized that there's really not much left there... so that I'm really not sure? I guess I'm just not personally experienced with that level of extreme first-hand? Or maybe I am? I don't know. I'm really trying to keep an open-mind across the board on this one. So... what about wild cats? Like a mountain lion or something? Can you domesticate those? Can you expect warmth and affection, bonding out of those? I mean... I've seen panthers cuddling with dogs and people before, I think it's well within reason... So the further down the animal kingdom we go, the tougher it gets. Bugs and shit it's like... I don't know how much there really is the bond with there...

But people, we're all in the same group, and we're all way up at the top as far as complexity of bonding and cognitive function. At least, as far as we know. So... we should all be much more capable than sharks or cats to learn how to coexist and adapt. To learn and see at very least at a survival level that being a good friend, good mate and good family member - keeping that relationship in good standing - is mutually beneficial to survival. Power in numbers, safety in numbers. There is a biological imperative to take care of eachother, at a core level. So I really don't know how people can just... have that shut off. Or voluntarily turn that off. I don't know. Maybe some people have that function impaired? I guess that's a theory of modern psychology? Genetic mutation, or chemical imbalance or something? I imagine if that is the case it would have to be phenomenally rare. But maybe the population boom is making those statistical anomalies more visible? I don't know anymore, it's all so complicated.

So maybe my whole thing of just having faith in the goodness of people is a coping mechanism to keep me from thinking about the evil of people. To not even entertain the thought, because of how horrifying it is. And how you can just turn into a paranoid wreck who trusts absolutely no one in the drop of a dime, and have mountains of evidence to reinforce that decision. Maybe having faith in the goodness of man is the only thing that keeps me from running off into the woods in like Alaska or some shit and just never coming back. Just hanging out with dogs and cats and racoons and foxes and shit, exploring the woods, collecting stones and elk and moose antlers. Making art and recording music. For who? Oh... there it is.

I guess we're going full circle. Let's really think about that. If I were on the North fucking Pole alone, in a bunker, for 20 years. Knowing full-well that no one would have any contact with my work until the time was up... I would still make art and music. And write. Constantly. As much as possible. And collect stories and memories. Memorable moments in video games, like when me and my friend Reaper made a bridge to drive a giant drilling rig across a canyon in Space Engineers, and I flew my Pelican shuttle backwards right in front of him so I could guide him across because he couldn't see the wheels and needed to have them perfectly lined up or else the whole thing was going into the canyon. Like making an Apothecary Shop in Minecraft creative mode with Chisels and Bits, and putting actual animated fluid bits into the little potion jars and making glass display cases full of them. Like a Rimworld colony I had way back when Sparkles (my builder) and the other builder (I don't remember his name) had spent so much time building together that they fell in love and got married, and it warmed my heart so much! Memorable moments in life, like when I went hiking at the river and came across a Red-Tailed Hawk that was on the ground for some reason. He flew up to a broken tree trunk that was like... 12 feet tall? And just perched up there and eyed me for a bit. I just stood there with him, probably... 5 yards away? Barefoot, sleeveless tee, backpack on, just staying still and sharing the space with him for a few minutes until he decided to move on.

To me, life is all about these moments. And capturing and cherishing these moments. Even the bad ones, unfortunately, in their own way. And I really feel like even if I were tossed in a rocket and blasted off to a moon base for the rest of my life, I would be doing this. I would be making a garden in my head and tending it regularly, waiting for inspiration to bloom. And when it inevitably does, to capture it to the best of my abilities. And bring it into the world, like birthing a child. I see that as my purpose, as a human. The purpose of my life. And I think I'd really be doing it no matter what circumstance you put me in. Like Picasso said --- okay, it's not what I thought it was. See, in college I was taught that the quote was like... if you put me in jail, I would paint with my own blood. But maybe that wasn't him? Or maybe someone misquoted? The actual quote is:

"We artists are indestructible; even in a prison, or in a concentration camp, I would be almighty in my own world of art, even if I had to paint my pictures with my wet tongue on the dusty floor of my cell."

So yeah, I got lost in reading quotes there. I'm kinda saying for like the third time that this life kinda just keeps choosing me. And a few years back, I stopped fighting it. It worked very well for me in college, I was very prolific. I just needed the right facilities, company around me to keep me sane during grueling 10+ hour marathon painting sessions, and some form of loose guidance (wasn't really necessary, honestly). A few years back, like 6+ months after my breakup, I really just... really decided to stop trying to superimpose a new life on top of mine. I stopped trying to just cram myself into a 9-5 formula and mold myself into what "society" wanted me to be. I went the other direction. I tried to engineer custom careers, relationships, workflow, all of it around what I naturally tend to gravitate back to. To stop fighting my natural impulses. To discern between primitive impulses (like wanting to smoke, wanting to have sex, being hungry, wanting to distract myself) and creative impulses. To be a bit more deliberate and mindful of the way I use these things, rather than just doing things for the sake of doing them. Which has never really been my style at my core, but society can teach a lot of nasty habits.

So I started to be deliberate about when and how I smoke tobacco, what I used it for. That one took the longest and was definitely the hardest. Sex has always been pretty easy to control, especially in isolation and having a very deeply strong link between physical and emotional feelings. I feel like... a really big part of being present in your life, is not just being on autopilot or doing things because it's what you're supposed to be doing. Like actually actively engaging with things and... well I guess that would make me a fan of mindfulness. I hate how people just... fuck with words and add subtext to make them "lame" or whatever.

Actually chewing and tasting your food, paying attention to the flavors and the textures. Not rushing to chew it as fast as possible and get it the fuck over with so you can get on to your next thing that you're going to get over with too. Slowing the fuck down and being in the moment. I try to live in that place. The Now. And people who are frantically trying to generate money, or consume "content", or rush rush rush to the next thing on the agenda? They would claw the fucking walls screaming if they were in my life for like... an hour. Tops.

So... I would consider this life "work". Considering most people choose the safety and security of a 9-5 and that kinda shit. And I seem like I'm oddly built for it. So I've been leaning in to it. And I've made some of my best work by leaps and bounds because of this. I am eternally grateful that Past Me made the decision to reconnect with all of the best parts of his past, and revive them. Create a home for them. It's the foundation on which my life today stands.

I'm still trying to figure it out, of course, how to make it work financially and everything. But it'll come together in time. Once I find people who believe in what I do, and want to experience my creations and share them with others.

Wow, all that off of a convo with my mom. It clearly went well.

Me and Max spent the rest of the day laying low. I was going to smoke during the day... for the third day in a row... and blew it off. "I don't want to be high in case Max tries to jump off something and hurts herself", "I don't want to cook when I'm high", "I don't have any media that doesn't have potentially dark content to play in the background while I'm playing Minecraft". So I just put off smoking until before this. Still a bit more paranoid than I'd like, half a hit isn't gonna fuck me up so bad that I burn my house down... that's paranoid shit and I don't like it. But yeah. That's just kinda where I was at today.

So Max is doing much better, she's walking more naturally now, much more alert. Almost wanted to play a bit towards bedtime. And we'll hear back on the blood results... whenever they get back to me, probably a few days.

Big day, get to catch up on sleep now. This was a hell of an existential tangent tonight, thanks for taking the ride with me.

[sunshineystilinski]

Stay

Pairing: Anthony Ramos x Reader

Warnings: mentions of cheating and cursing

Prompt: basically your partner cheated on you and you have to go on as Peggy/Maria and Anthony is there to comfort you.

Word Count: 1,424

masterlist

When you walked into the Richard Rogers theater, eyes puffy and earbuds plugged in, he knew something was up.

Normally, you would walk in smiling, automatically brightening up his everyone’s day. You would laugh and crack jokes. You were a cheery person. And him being your best friend, he noticed things.

Your hair was pulled back in a messy bun, your clothes were disheveled. You walked past him without a word, which made him even more suspicious. He followed you to your dressing room. You heard his footsteps following yours, and you honestly didn’t give a fuck.

You slipped in through the door and threw your backpack on the couch. You heard the noise of the door click shut. You spun around, noticing Anthony. You paused your music and took out your earbuds. He gave you look of worry, but you ignored it and brought your gaze to the floor. He noticed your gesture and shook his head.

“Y/N, what’s wrong? And don’t you dare tell me nothing is wrong, I know something’s up.” Anthony questioned. You brought your head up and his eyes met yours.

“They, they cheated.” You mumbled, barely audible. He still heard you.

He tackled you in a bone-crushing hug. You hugged him back as the tears began to fall yet again. He rubbed circles on your back and whispered “it’s okay” in your ear.

“Wait, Y/N, you shouldn’t be here! You should be sleeping, or crying, or eating, or something,” He rambled, “Wait why are you here? Oh shit, that seems mean. I mean- you know what I meant.”

“Well Jasmine is sick so…” You trailed off. His mouth opened, but no sound came out.

“Does that mean you have to go on as M-” He asked, but you cut him off

“Yes, that means I have to go on as Maria.” You finished. He gave you a sympathetic look.

“Y/N, you shouldn’t have to do that.” He sighed, hugging you again.

“It’s fine.” You lied, but he couldn’t seem to tell.

“Now if you don’t mind, I have to get ready.” You announced and he nodded.

“See you out there.” Anthony commented.

“See you out there.” You responded.

You just finished Act 1 as Peggy and everything seemed to be running smoothly. You ran into your dressing room and changed into the red dress that represented Maria. You took of your previous lipstick and quickly threw on some red lipstick. You made it to the wings with five minutes to spare.

Anthony stood at your side and took your hand. He squeezed it re-assuringly. You gave him a smile, pushing away the tears at the brim of your eyes. You were going to go on any minute, right after “Take A Break”.

Anthony released your hand and made his way on stage. You laughed as he did his little rap as nine year-old Philip. He looked your way and you gave a thumbs-up. He returned his focus back to the song, before quickly rushing back to you.

You gave him a hug and you both smiled. Before you knew it, it was time for you to go onstage.

“There’s nothing like summer in the city…” You heard Leslie sing. Anthony let go and you took a big gulp of air.

“Someone under stress meets someone looking pretty.” Anthony gave your shoulders a squeeze.

“There’s trouble in the air and you can smell it.” Anthony pressed a kiss to your forehead.

“And Alexander’s by himself, I’ll let him tell it.” He brought his lips to your right ear.

“You’ll do great.” He whispered as the song went on.

“That’s when Miss Maria Reynolds walked into my life, she said” You walked on a little late, but you continued on as nothing happened.

“I know you are a man of honor,” You looked into Lin’s eyes.

“I’m so sorry to bother you at home.” You slightly smiled and took a step closer to Lin.

“But I don’t know where to go, and I came here all alone.” That’s when it really hit you. They cheated on you. You went on auto-pilot for most of the song.

You tuned back in towards the end.

“If you pay,” You took a deep breath.

“You can staaaaaaaay” You felt a tear escape your eye. You continued on, feeling the tears cascade down your cheeks, but you ignored them

As soon the song was over, you rushed off. The sobbing began.

Renee and Pippa rushed to your side and guided you to a seat.

“Y/N? What’s wrong, love?” Pippa cooed, rubbing your back.

“They- cheated- on- me.” You choked out between sobs. Renee hugged you tightly.

“Y/N, sweetheart you shouldn’t have gone on.” Renee said softly. You shook your head.

“Jazzy is sick, I had too.” You sniffled.

“We could’ve found someone to cover for you.” Pippa explained.

“It’s okay, it just brought back some feelings. I’ll be okay.” You rubbed your E/C eyes and wiped your tears. Renee and Philipa gave you a soft smile before taking seats at your side.

They stayed by your side until one of you had to go on and immediately came back afterwords. When it was over, they bowed with you. They walked to your dressing room with you.

You were all taking your makeup off as someone knocked at the door.

“Come in!” You shouted before returning to removing the rest.

You saw Anthony in your mirror. You turned around and gave him a small smile.

“Could you guys give us a sec?” You looked at the girls. They nodded and exited the room.

“Y/N, I heard about what happened after Say No To This. I wish I could’ve been there to help you.” He sighed, taking a seat on the sofa in your rom.

“I’m okay.” You responded, taking a seat next to him.

“Y/N, if you need somewhere to stay, my place is always open. I know you were staying with them..” He trailed off and you nodded.

“Thank you Anthony, truly I appreciate it. I think I’ll take you up on that offer.” You took his hand and smiled.

“Well seeing that we’re both changed, would you like to head out?” He stood up, dragging you up with him.

“I will probably get my things tomorrow, but for now this is my only change of clothes.” You laughed a little and gestured to your outfit.

“I probably have something at my place you can wear.” He announced as you walked out of the theater.

You walked hand in hand until you  reached his apartment. He jiggled his keys out of his pocket and stuck one in the keyhole. He opened the door and let you inside.

You had been to Anthony’s before but today it felt.. different.

“I’ll go grab you some clothes, be right back.” He told you and you nodded.

You looked around as you waited for clothes. Anthony came back with a pair of his sweatpants and a tshirt. He handed them to you and you thanked him.

You changed in his bathroom and couldn’t help but think his clothes smelled like him.

You exited his bathroom and saw him setting up the couch with blankets and pillows.

“Thank you Ant, I could’ve done that.” You exclaimed.

“Oh, no, Y/N you're sleeping in my bed tonight.” He confirmed. You were about to say something but he shook his head.

“No buts.“ He smiled.

“Actually, I was gonna ask if you could tuck me in” You giggled. He fake sighed and followed you to his bedroom.

You climbed into his comfy bed as he headed over. He smiled and tucked the blankets.

“Goodnight, Y/N.” He kissed your forehead and began to walk away.

“Wait..” You cried, grabbing his hand. He turned and tilted his head.

“Stay.” You stated. He shook his head to protest but you cut him off.

“Please.” You begged. He let go of your hand. He traveled to the other side of the bed and hopped in. He scooted close to you and wrapped his arms around your waist.

“Much better.” You said sleepily.

You heard him say something along the lines of “I love you”, but you were already asleep.

A/N: I loved writing this so much. Also, thank you for 150!! I love you guys.