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omegangrins · 4 years ago

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Chibnall, Children, Choice and Consequence

Allow me to introduce a companion piece to A Treatise on the Doctor:

It's pretty simple:

Chibnall knows what he's doing and is playing a long game to show how the Doctor needs to take more responsibility.

Let me start off with my favorite examples. That's right, plural.

Every single villain 13 faces is never defeated, merely pushed away from causing them any immediate problems. Tim Shaw being the prime example.

1&10. Seriously, Tim Shaw. Her plan was to use his own bombs on him and then teleport him off the planet. Even without Ranskoor Av Kolos, the Doctor should have thought to check in on him. Especially after The Ghost Monument showed the Stenza were a greater threat than she knew. She still hasn't even checked up on WHAT THE HELL THE STENZA ARE! They sound worse than Daleks but naw, let's go rain-bathing in the upper tropics of Canstano instead.

2. Ghost Monument. We saw the END of an interuniversal race. What the fuck is the beginning that got them there? Who is Illyn and how and why did he orchestrate a super race?

3. Krasko. Sent back in time. Really, Doc? Not gonna take a look at the device and see where Ryan sent the prick so you can double check that he's not gonna cause anymore damage?

4. President Trump analog. Ooooo, you looked at him menacingly, Doc, that'll show him!! Not like he's gonna KEEP DOING ILLEGAL SHIT LIKE THIS.

5. The Pting. She literally shunted it off ship to be dealt with by someone else BUT DOESN'T GO BACK TO BE THAT SOMEONE ELSE ONCE SHE HAS HER TARDIS. That's like leaving a living nuke floating around after sweeping it under the rug while you fly off to Paris.

6. The Pakistani-Indian conflict still happens and millions still die. Not her fault but still....

7. Kerblam. Sure, Charlie's terrorism was solved but not the underlying problem that led to it. Humans still can't work because corporations like profits over people.

8. Similar to the Punjab, how you gonna solve sexism, classism and all the -isms?

9. WHY WAS THE SOLITRACT THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE??!! It's been around since before the universe. Why'd it decide to come back now? It's a whole universe trying to hug our universe to death. Maaaaaaybe we should check out why.

11. She's gets a pass on the Dalek. Fucking impossible to eradicate them.

12. The Master!!! Finally she checks up on something after the adventures... and it's horrible. With everything gone to shit in her absence. Seeing a pattern yet?

And Barton? And the Cassaven? They didn't disappear into smoke.

13. Multiple Earths being multiply fucked. Remember when I said the Doctor couldn't solve racism, classism, sexism, or any of the other -isms? Starting to look like she needs to TRY.

14. The Skithra FLY OFF after getting hit by a laser beam. That kind of thing tends to piss people off. Even if they're idiots using other's technology.

15. Jack. The Judoon. The Ruth Doctor. All things I'd start checking out if I had a time machine BUT

16. WE CAN'T cause the TARDIS emergency alert is going off and we need to hurry up and run and solve this problem before we run out of time in our TIME AND SPACE MACHINE. Leading to another problem the Doctor could help solve but won't. Plastic and over-consumption.

17. Oh yeah, let's trap two Eternals from another universe in the same place. There's NO WAY that could ever turn out bad.

18,19,20. And again. Cyberium. Pushed off Shelley onto herself and onto Ashad and onto The Master.

That's almost 20 "enemies" the Doctor still needs to deal with.

Oh, not to mention that they let UNIT go defunct because they didn't have the forethought to ask if they needed any money in their alien fighting budget. After asking for an office, a desk, and a job. Kinda funny that way, aren't they?

I hope by now you've gotten the idea that this is VERY deliberate. This is Chibnall laying down some very heavy pipe to smack the Doctor like a clothesline. There isn't a one of these situations that can't come around to bite her in the ass.

Barton, Roberts, Skithra. These are all very loose strands for a time traveller like the Doctor to get tripped up on. Chibnall's past episodes prove it. They're all about the Doctor learning how to take responsibility.

42: The Doctor almost gets Martha killed and almost gets himself killed trying to fix it.

The Hungry Earth: The Doctor (a thousand year old "adult") tells Elliot (a 10 year old kid) that "Sure it's totally fine to go get your headphones while we prepare for an approaching unknown alien force." And 11 rightfully gets his ass chewed for it by the child's mother when the kid goes missing because OF COURSE THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS, JACKASS!

Cold Blood: I could write an entire essay about the Doctor's guilt over the Silurian/Human conflicts they've witnessed, but I don't need to. Because every single Silurian centered episode written in the new era is from Chris Chibnall. And you can feel the sad knowledge of Classic Who spill through. He KNOWS how many times the Doctor has fucked up with the Silurians (about 8 times in television format. And it's rough everytime. Rough.) and he writes those episodes like an apology on behalf of the whole human race. And the Doctor. You know why people are put off by Warriors of the Deep? 5 releases a gas that melts the Silurians. And though it's cheesy, the idea and execution is still horrible.

Add to that if the Doctor hadn't stopped to check the crack, then Rory wouldn't have waited and been around to be shot then absorbed by the time crack.

Power of Three: An entire episode about how the Doctor has a problem slowing down and really taking account of the lives of their companions.

Dinosaurs on a Spaceship: The Doctor actually tries to be responsible and pick the right people for a job. For once. But gets angry when they realize it's too late and there's another bunch of Silurians they failed to save. Classic!

Like I said, if you can't see the pattern, you're not paying enough attention to your responsibilites.

Which leads me to the why.

When you fly around time and space for thousands of years, you develop a few duties of care along the way. In every situation, you're the oldest. Technically the only adult in terms of experience. You have a responsibility to act a little less rude and be a bit more aware than needing cue cards to tell you that you should be sad about things around you. And that's the purpose of 13. She's unlucky but learning. Like 12 telling himself something with his face he couldn't say out loud, 13's instincts are leading her to a new place for the Doctor: being a caring, responsible person. Not so much laughing hard or running fast, but being kind. It's the one thing they recognized as a problem in themselves when seeing 1. Being a Doctor is about being kinder than that. Just because you HAVE to saw someone's leg off, that doesn't mean you can't wait a little and comfort them before you do it.

You wanna know what gave me every faith in Chibnall showrunning Doctor Who? 13 staying for Grace's funeral.

Do you understand how unprecedented that is? This is the same person who never said Goodbye to Jo Grant as she got married and fucked off into the night. The same Doctor who said, "I don't do domestic.", did it with Rose a regeneration later, and then closed himself off to everyone but a married couple he felt guilty about who ended up birthing his wife. Have you any idea the number of funerals the Doctor should have the common decency to sit through? This many.

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So for 13 to stay around for the death of a woman she has only just met and not only that, BUT call out Ryan's father for not doing the same, it shows tremendous character growth. It's taken millennia but they're still changing.

Something similar happens with Rosa and The Witchfinders. Realizing that there a lot of companions who have been in situations that are sometimes worse than aliens, but they still manage to make it through. So she needs to buck it up and persevere for everyone else.

That's where her anger comes from, and really it's one of my favorite traits on her. It reminds me of 7. Someone impossibly old and impossibly kind saying to hell with it and at least having some fun with the evils who drag us through the universe. And just like Cartmel planned for 7, 13's past will come to haunt her.

That's where children come in. Most of us are crying babies to the Doctor.

There's this thing you notice most in British shows about answering the question directly as asked. Someone says "Are you sure?", you answer "Sure". That's a direct acknowledgement that you heard the question, understood it, and processed it enough to respond in a manner directly correlating to the question asked. Yas and Graham got it and said "Sure" but Ryan missed it and said "Deffo". This is like Elliot with the headphones. The Doctor should have immediately been like, "Okay, Ryan, it's obvious that you're still dealing with the trauma of your grandmother's death and probably not processing things on a logical level. I said "Are you sure?" Not "Are you deffo?" Because we are most definitely not deffo, Ryan. Graham, you wanna help here?"

I'm being sarcastic for points sake but you understand the idea. The Doctor knows better and has a responsibility as such. She should've really sat down with Ryan and Graham and seen if there was a better way to process their grief.

Because I'm fairly certain that "Deffo" is gonna lead to Ryan's death and Graham's cancer resurging as time cancer (I don't know what time cancer is. I just know it's bad.)

And that is gonna piss Yas off. Which will give you all that character you think she's missing (she isn't. Her character is in her subtleties and silences.). That's WHY her character is a police officer (like how does no else see that the man who wrote Broadchurch wrote an inspector character companion?) Imagine you're Yaz and you see the Doctor flying around in a big, magic box that says POLICE. As a fellow officer, you're gonna expect some basic safety protocols.

Like do a background check on everyone flying in the TARDIS to know whether they're stable enough (mentally, physically, emotionally) for time and space travel. It's no picnic. These people are going to go through hell. A little vetting and planning like Time Heist or Dinosaurs on a Spaceship goes a long way.

Secondly, full fucking disclosure.

"Oh. I can't die because I change my body. Oh. I have arch enemies that will try to kill and torture us any chance they get. Oh. My home planet is full of the biggest assholes in the universe and I'm including my arch enemies."

Third, police like to do this thing called "check-ups" where they go back to the scene of the crime in order to see if there is any more information that can be gleaned which you might not notice when you are busy running around trying not to be killed... Like, the Doctor has the perfect machine to do this with, but nope. Adventure done, run to the next place!!

These are all things you'd expect any reasonable person to do and say when taking others flying off into time and space and "helping". Even if they are an idiot passing through and learning. Especially when you consider the Doctor is vastly older and more experienced than everyone they encounter. They SHOULD know better. And they've got the lifespan to slow down. It's not like they need to be in a hurry because they're going to die at any moment like humans. The Doctor could easily stay for tea and it would be less than a drop in their lifespan.

Now, as usually is the case when I make these theories, I have a parts 1,2,3,4 and 6. There's allways this 5th piece I miss but I manage to get at the end.

But the 6th piece is the Timeless Child. The Doctor isn't a Time Lord anymore. They're not beholden to those people and ideas anymore. Even moreso, those people basically raped her childhood for their own gain so it's not like you'd really listen to them and their "policy of non-intervention".

I'm sensing a coming Trial of a Time Lord season (even believing these two seasons are the opening statement and preliminary evidence of the trial itself) wherein the Doctor finally gets the turnaround 6 deserved. A Trial of the Time Lords, if you will.

"In all my travels through time and space I have battled against evil, against power-mad conspirators. I should have stayed here! The oldest civilization: decadent, degenerate and rotten to the core! Power mad conspirators? Daleks, Sontarans, Cybermen — they're still in the nursery compared to us! Ten million years of absolute power: that's what it takes to be really corrupt!"

This is what it's all coming down to. Chibnall's takedown of the Time Lords. And The Master is going to play the most crucial role of all.

They're going to be revealed as an Ux alongside the Doctor and show how the only constants they have in this universe are each other and it's about damn time they work together and tell these high collars to eat Schitt while they explore every star and planet they can find.

Come on, the episode is called The Timeless "Children". If it was just the Doctor it'd be called "The Timeless Child". The Master says as much with the misdirect line, "built on the lie of the Timeless Child." since we see two kids playing in that flashback.

"Since always. Since the Cloister Wars, since the night he stole the moon and the president's wife, since he was a little girl. One of those was a lie, can you guess which one?"

Now we know which one was a lie, we know the Master HAS known the Doctor since they were a little girl. THAT little girl...

But this is all just speculation. It's not like Chris Chibnall could have been thinking about this for the past 40 years and was given a blank slate to do whatever he wanted for five years on his favorite TV show. If y'all want to think he took those reigns and is choosing to make things worse...

Well then you don't know much about responsibility.

I'll let the man himself tell you about it.

"Very early in my career,” says Chibnall, “someone told me that you learn more from a failure than you do from a success. And then I lived out that phrase for a year in Los Angeles. I learned that I would not work that way again or be put in that situation again.” The essential lesson was: “You either have to be in total control of a show or working with people who share your vision and will work with you to achieve it. Also, never work with 13 executive producers.

“Camelot was the classic case of too many cooks. It wasn’t a harmonious set-up and I think that does manifest itself on screen.

“I had a fantastic cast but you have to be free to tell the story you want to tell in the way that you want to tell it. What ended up on screen was not what I wanted and so it is a blemish on my CV.”

Credit to @thirteenthdoc

“You immortals - so entitled, so spoiled. You never clear up after yourselves and you always leave stuff lying around.” - Thirteenth Doctor in Can You Hear Me?

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dorcasavelinehill · 5 years ago

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YOUR ARMS FEEL LIKE HOME - Ch. 1: Where I’ve Never Been

https://archiveofourown.org/works/21747418/chapters/51883063

The children had made a wrong turn somewhere. Shadows fell away, lost in the brightness of a search light. The beam glided back and forth, and the children were center stage, on a dock without cover, with no darkness to hide in. Behind them, water. No buildings to climb, no walls to scurry over. The four boys thought, we need to swim for it, but then thought, no, the girl can’t keep up. She isn’t as fast in the water. She needs land under her feet to make a clean getaway.

Between them and freedom, six - no, seven men. Large, all towering high, and armed. Four of the men had knives, two had handguns. One seemed unarmed, but they remembered their fathers words. Never trust appearances. The men slowed as they approached the kids, uncertainty making them hesitate. One stepped forward. The leader? “What the hell are you supposed to be?” The men lowered their arms. They understood now, these were kids. Weird looking kids, but kids. Defiant, the children refused to answer. There was a moment of silence as they exchanged looks. One raised a brow. Another cocked his head, smiling. The girl wrinkled her nose. The third boy nodded. The fourth inclined his head. “It ain’t Halloween.” The big guy in front tucked his gun in the back of his pants. Dumb move. Underestimated them. “What kind of costumes -” “Sorry.” The oldest child, the eldest boy, spoke up. Soft voice, small smile. “We’re not wearing costumes.” He charged. The other four followed him. Well trained. The men regretted thinking this was a joke. Swords slashing, coming down hard on the remaining firearm, before the man holding it could get his finger on the trigger. The rest was easy. One blocked a knife swing. Another ducked a punch. They returned the blows, weapons sheathed, even the swords now that the gun was out of play. They took damage. You couldn’t go unarmed to a knife fight and not take cuts. The girl with them dodged and bounced like a jumping jack. She lacked the natural armor of the other four, so had to be creative to stay out of the knives’ range. The big guys were aiming at her, thinking her the easiest target. Her brothers took exception to these thugs targeting their sister. A knife thrust hard, should have been able to kill the victim, a straight shot to the liver. Instead, the blade crumpled. The guy holding it shrieked a swear and dropped the now useless weapon. Fist to his face. He fell. Block. Dodge. Punch. These were kids? They hit harder than most men! And the girl might as well be a flea on a dog’s hide, fast and furious. She couldn’t land as hard a blow as her brothers, but she only had to let them wear themselves down chasing her. Her brothers took the men down for her. One man went down like a tree in a forest. Now the girl pounced. Instead of fists, she wound zip-cord around the man's arms and torso. It was a thin, lightweight, plastic-and-metal wire. The thug fell on his face; she planted her foot on the back of his neck, caught his arm in a loop of the zip-cord. Had him hogtied in seconds. The boys brought the men down, disarmed them, tripped them, laid them out prone. They found the zip-cord impossible to unwind, impossible to break. It didn’t bite into the skin like a regular metal cord would. They couldn't snap it. Only the clever little device on the girl’s belt could nick off a length of wire. Seven men, tied and helpless, hollering, cursing. Asking what the fuck, what the hell? A slap of duct tape across the lips. Not a perfect gag, but it would keep them quite long enough for the kids to get back to the shadows. The youngest boy laughed, wiped blood and sweat from his brow with the back of his hand. “Welp, that was fun!” “Yeah, let’s not do that again,” middle-kid said dryly. “Bye, guys!” the girl sang. Red hair, sticky and wet with sweat. They ran. The men struggled to sit up, to get free, trying to see which way the children went. The kids fled the light. Found the shadows. Became the shadows. It wasn’t a technique. The girl’s night-time camouflage outfit didn't simply blend in the dark. One moment the kids were there, three-dimensional objects in space. The next moment? They might as well have melted like snow in July. All that remained was an echo of laughter. The thrum of feet on the pier. The whip of wind flowing around them. The big guy with the gun in the back of his pants stared at the empty space where they’d been a moment before. He wondered if he hadn’t just seen his first ghosts.

*****

April loved summer nights. The biggest problem with New York City was that all the stars in the night sky weren’t visible. There was far too much light pollution from the skyscrapers, and the compact city growing ever upward. April found the lack of starlight disappointing, but the illuminated skyline almost made up for it. Instead of focusing on the vanished Milky Way, she trained her camera on Billionaire’s Row. The buildings had a sort of stark beauty she liked, though if asked, she would admit the older, less minimalistic buildings were her favorite. “Yer gonna lose it if y’aint careful.” Raph stood beside her on the edge of the XYZ building, watching her adjust the camera’s focus. He had a bad cut from where one of the gang members had caught him with the tip of a knife blade, but aside from that, he’d done a good job coming out unscathed. The camera flashed. She advanced the film and quickly took two more pictures. “I haven’t dropped it yet,” she said without looking at him. Raph watched April lean precariously out on the edge and grabbed her belt, arm extending as he let her swing out as far as she could go. She needed to get the perfect angle for this picture. One more shot, and she let Raphael haul her back onto the roof properly. The other three sat in the center of the roof, looking each other over for injuries. Michelangelo had the first aid kit he wore on the back of his belt out, rubbing something April guessed was antiseptic over a bad wound on Leonardo’s shoulder, then pressed a pad of gauze to it before taping it down. He completed the wound care by taping a Scooby-Doo band-aid on top of the dressing. Leonardo looked at Mike’s handiwork with a wide grin of amusement. Donatello had several nasty slashes on the inside of his elbow. Mike cleaned up Don’s wounds, and graced him with a Spongebob bandage, which Donnie flaunted. April flopped down dramatically. “It’s horrible! I’m exhausted! I’m completely worn out, and I must be near death!” She sprawled beside Mike like a dying woman begging for a drop of water. Mike held up a band-aid. “I’m out of Barbie.” He turned the bandage to show her Scooby-Doo. “Aw, come on!” “I’ve got Scooby for you. But if you don’t want that...” Mike dug through his first aid kit, tossing aside boxes with Batman, Captain Ryan, and Flintstones band-aids. “Take your pick!” He beamed at April, who graced him with a sour frown. “Do you at least have Disney Princesses?” Mike looked down at the boxes surrounding him. “Uh, no.” April threw her arms up dramatically. “I’m crushed! Crushed!” Leo mock-frowned. “What’s wrong with Scooby? I got Scooby.” He turned his shoulder to her, pointing to the Scooby-Doo band-aid slapped across the thick layers of gauze and tape. April rolled her eyes at Leo and flung the back of her hand over her eyes, trying to look like a tragic figure from a Renaissance painting, though she only managed to look like a gangly kid who hadn’t grown into her feet yet. “I’m a damsel. A princess. A goddess! I deserve Barbie on my band-aid.” Mike started tucking the scattered boxes back in the first aid kit. “Well, since you didn’t actually get hurt, and you only want Barbie -” April thrust a pristine arm out at him. “Gimme Scooby.” He found a random spot on her arm where she could show it off nicely and stuck the bandaid on her. Raphael rolled his eyes and started cleaning up his own cheek, preferring to tend to his own wounds, rather than have Mike do it. “I swear ta God yer both five.” “Seven,” April corrected. “I don’t believe in Santa Claus.” At fourteen, she had the awkward grace of a well-trained ballerina with too much leg and not enough hip or bust. Her brothers were more well-proportioned, though one could tell by looking at them that they were going to get a lot taller, and sooner rather than later. Well, if one could look at them without screaming in panic. Or attacking. Not too many people had ever seen them, but on the handful of occasions they were noticed, attacking and screaming were the default actions of whoever looked at them. They were giant turtles, after all. Leonardo was tall, about 5’9”, and getting taller. April was slightly displeased with this situation because it meant he would be able to pick her up and dangle her upside down soon, which he had threatened to do the last time she’d stolen the last pudding pop from him, and the bossy bastard might just do it, too. On his person, he carried his swords strapped to his back, extra zip-cord in his belt, and rolls of film April begged him to hold for her when she couldn’t fit them in her own belt pouch. She considered him the perfect accessory - a purse that didn’t get cluttered because he’d refuse to carry too much for her. At eighteen, he was the oldest son, and he made sure everyone knew it, especially when their dad wasn’t around. Bossy bastard. April loved him anyway. With his cheek cleaned up, Raphael dropped to a crouch beside April, holding out his uninjured arm. “I want Pokemon,” he said. Mike stuck his tongue out, but found a Pikachu bandage and slapped it on Raph’s forearm. Raph was sixteen but stood two inches taller than Leo. He was a little self-conscious of his big feet that their father kept assuring him he would grow into. He wasn’t always the easiest person to get along with, naturally rebelling every time Leo pretended to be an adult. Sometimes he lost his temper, but April found ignoring him until he got out of his funk the best way to deal with his drama. Most of the time, Raph was fun to be around, and he usually just indulged her in whatever she wanted to do. Raph carried a pair of sai tucked in his belt. Michaelangelo, at fifteen, was the baby of the boys, and at 5’6” was still quite a bit taller than April. He had the biggest blue eyes and the sweetest smile, and could always coax the others into some kind of fun or mischief. It was actually Mike’s fault they’d gotten lost and had run into those bums. Their father had shooed them out of the house with express orders not to come home before midnight, but not after 2:00 AM. They still had time to kill, and Mike had come up with a great idea for keeping busy, but the boy couldn’t find his own way out of a paper bag if he had a compass and a map. He always hauled around the first-aid kit, along with a pair of nunchaku and a bag he carried to hold whatever cool things he happened to find on their nights out. Last count, he had two sea shells, a dirty magazine, and a police-style whistle, but April didn’t know if he’d added to his collection since they left home. Before she could poke her nose in Mike’s stuff, Donatello scooted beside her and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her onto his lap. “Did you get the pictures you wanted?” “Yep!” She squirmed in his grip, getting loose and popping the film out of the camera. She thrust the roll at him for him to take. Donnie took it, freeing up her hands to reload the camera. “I wanna get some more though, before we head back.” Don tucked the film away in his belt for her. “Digital cameras don’t need film,” he teased. April planned on Donnie spending his Saturday morning developing the film for her. She was still learning how to do it on her own, but until she was more sure of herself, she wanted Don’s skillful hands at work on her pictures. “Film looks better,” she said, not looking up. She wound the camera ahead until it was ready to start a new series of photos. Leo was absently wrapping his toes up in Superman band-aids. “Digital’s cheaper,” he said. April rolled her eyes. “Mister Adult.” Don was seventeen, second-oldest, but he never talked down to April the way Leo did sometimes. He might pick on her love of “old-fashioned” things, but Don had a way of taking her seriously that Leo lacked. He was a studious young man, with a dry wit and a sarcastic sense of humor. He was terribly subtle, sometimes so much so that by the time he’d insulted you twice, you were only just figuring it out. Altogether, April adored her brothers, and they treated her like their own little princess. Mike smacked Leo’s hand and took back the still-wrapped band-aids before their fearless leader could waste the rest of them. “Hey.” He looked around, squinting in the darkness to make out the skyline. “I think I know where we’re at now.” “Uh-oh,” Don breathed, and Raph snorted, “Right.” “No, really, I do! Look, if we head two blocks west, four blocks south, the store’s right there.” Mike pointed as if there were a building just beyond his fingertip. “We can be there in five minutes tops. Tops!” “Isn’t that what he said an hour ago?” Don asked Leo lightly. “You mean, right before we got jumped? Yes, I seem to recall -” “I’m serious this time!” Mike hopped to his feet. “Come on, it’s like, ten-to-midnight, and he probably isn’t expecting us until about one! We got time. Unless you want to go home early and go right to bed.” Raphael snorted. “Oh, hell no. C’mon, it’s better than bein’ stuck inside.” Don rolled his eyes, but stood up with the other boys, throwing his vote with Mike. Leo blew a sigh out his nose and shook his head lightly. “We’re going to get in serious trouble.” “We’re not!” Mike protested. “Swear to God, no alarm system. We could walk right in and nobody would know.” Leo poked April in the side where she lay serpentine on the roof. “Come on. I can see I’m not going to win this one.” April mock-swooned and covered her eyes with the back of her hand. “I’m too heavy to walk. Carry me!” Raph said, “Bye,” and took off across the rooftops. Leo shrugged and followed. Mike had the bad grace to wave at her before giving chase. “Hey!” She jumped to her feet, stomping one foot. “Some superheroes they are! They just left me here!” “Yep.” Donnie patted her shoulder and proceeded to leave April behind as well. Cheeky bastards, all of them, she thought and raced to catch up.

#tmnt fanfiction #tmnt leonardo #tmnt donatello #tmnt april #tmnt michelangelo #tmnt raphael #tmnt splinter #tmnt #tmnt 2003 #tmnt fanfic

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kariachi · 5 years ago

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Chapter 4 of the pokemon au! I actually got out a damage calculator to make sure I got this battle just right!

“Finally! We made it, Rose.” Though she couldn’t see the town at the edge of the trail, all but carved into the side of the mountain, Kevin’s little Deino still gave an excited cry. He’d called her out as soon as he’d gathered up his broken pokeballs, determined both to get to know his first pokemon (first friend) and that if he was going to wander around the mountain aching with bites and bruises so was she. The company had been nice, though he’d had to develop a habit of trudging through the snow with an arm around her neck to keep her from blindly wandering away and falling off a cliff or something. They’d even been through a few battles, though those maybe hadn’t been the best showing…

It was fine, she’d already been injured, once they were both patched up everything would be great.

This close to Tambou the trail was much smoother and easier to follow, even growing a fence at some point, which meant it only took about an hour and a half for the pair to make their way passed the town gate and to the Pokemon Center, where the resident Joy had just about choked to see them covered in Kevin’s haphazard bandaging. The two were immediately hustled into the back, where Kevin had been forced at Chansey-point to explain exactly why they both looked like they’d fallen down the mountain (carefully leaving out the point where they had, the day before, almost fallen down the mountain, because telling adults that sort’ve thing never ended well).

Honestly Kevin had very quickly found himself very uncomfortable with the situation, unused to everything from having someone else patch him up to having someone else make sure he ate. Rose hadn’t been much better, being only a few days out of the wild and possibly catching on to his own discomfort. She bit the Chansey twice and the nurse once before she and Kevin were able to flee out the front door with a key to one of the Center’s dormrooms, a note asking someone at the local market to sell him a replacement tent for cheap (with a promise Joy would make up the difference later) that Kevin was tempted to toss, and an order to not head for the gym until they at least had a good night’s sleep under their belts.

Kevin had never in his life followed an order and he certainly wasn’t going to start now.

The Tambou Pokemon Gym was the highest building in the town, up what felt like hundreds of steps towards the mountain’s peak. It was an impressive thing, all carved stone and glass, with loads of thick wooden beams that served as perches for great flocks of flying types. Kevin had never seen so many in one place before, nor such a variety- everything from Unfezant to Corviknight preened and chattered and watched people bustle around below. It was almost intimidating. It was intimidating. A hint of doubt nibbled at the base of his spine as he watched them, only to be shoved away with a shake of his head. He was smart and talented and a trainer who had caught his own first pokemon, which was more than you could say for most people, and he was not about to be intimidated by a bunch of birds. No. Arm in place around Rose he purposefully strode forward and shouldered open the door.

The fact that the first gym trainer they saw was just, staring at them in concern did nothing to stop Kevin leading Rose forward, back straight and shoulders back.

“I’m here to challenge the gym.” The trainer looked down at their bandages, bruises, cuts, then back at his face.

“You’re sure?”

“Yep.” She chewed her lip for a moment, then sighed and turned to another trainer.

“Go tell Akash he has a challenger?” The other teen also gave Kevin and Rose a critical look, but nodded and trotted across the arena to a door at the back, his Hoppip floating behind him. It was only a few minutes, five at most, before Flying Master Akash strode back out the door with a grin on his face and a Swoobat hanging from his arm, clearly more than ready to greet and face whoever had arrived.

Then he saw Kevin and Rose.

Face softening to something less bombastic, he walked forward and held out a hand to shake, one that Kevin gave his best grip.

“Hello there, trainer. Ivan didn’t give me your name?”

“Kevin,” he replied, “and this is Rose.” She chirped at her name, then tried to take a bite out of the Swoobat when it dropped to the ground to come investigate her, only being stopped by Kevin’s restrictive grip. Akash watched this with some interest.

“How long have you been a trainer, Kevin?” That, was not a question he liked.

“About a week,” he didn’t quite lie. Akash just nodded.

“And you already have a Deino, she from family?”

“No, caught her a few days back.” The trainer he’d spoke to before took a hissing breath through her teeth, prompting Kevin to throw a glare her way, through the gym leader and his pokemon paid neither any mind.

“Well,” he said instead, “that’s quite an accomplishment for someone only a week into their journey.” The compliment ricocheted around Kevin’s head, bringing the first hints of a smile to Kevin’s face before he continued. “Still, normally the challengers we see are a little… bigger.”

Which was certainly one way of saying they didn’t tend to get new trainers challenging. Okay, he understood that Tambou was usually a gym trainers hit later in their journeys, and that most trainers did put their journeys on pause early on to spend a few years growing and learning before continuing, but-

“Part of your job is to be able to adjust to give a proper challenge to trainers at any point in their journey,” he said, jaw clenching and familiar stubbornness steeling his spine. Rose crooned agreement.

“That it is,” Akash said with a sigh, looking like he was honestly concerned, which just aggravated Kevin further. “I just want to be sure you want to challenge me now. Most people take another week to challenge their first gym.”

“Yeah, well, I’m not most people.”

“Clearly.” He looked Kevin and Rose over one last time, then nodded and began to head for the far end of the arena, where he pulled a drawer out of the wall. “How many pokemon do you have?”

“One.” And Akash froze. The gym trainers froze. It was clear, especially with the way all of them turned to stare, that they were doing the math in their heads and coming up with numbers they didn’t like. Kevin just glared back until everyone else looked away, the trainers bustling over to the stands to watch and take notes, and Akash returning to choosing his team.

“Alright then, Kevin,” he said, “it’ll be a one-on-one battle, first pokemon to be rendered unable to continue will lose, agreed?” Kevin lead Rose to the challenger’s end of the arena and ushered her within the boundaries as the gym leader spoke.

“Agreed.” Akash took his place opposite Kevin, tossing a single pokeball in his hand, watching Rose for several seconds before sighing and releasing the pokemon inside.

The Spearow gave a harsh cry and immediately took to the air, clearly ready for a fight, and Kevin couldn’t stop himself from grinning. He’d always liked Spearow, they were his favorite flying-type for their perfect combination of form, function, and aesthetic. Capable of exactly what they needed to be capable of, with no excess fuss, while looking like something whose nest you should stay away from. It was right about Weedle as a species that, in that dull pre-Rose world, would’ve been a tempting catch.

But his Deino was better.

“Rose, Dragon Rage!” With a trill the little dragon let loose a familiar plume of blue flame towards the Spearow. Technically. Kevin cringed as it missed with the flying-type hardly having to move at all. “Again!” Another plume, and another miss. She just couldn’t tell where it was, only a vague idea from the sound of it’s wingbeats. Akash allowed this to happen three times, giving them plenty of chances to land a blow before retaliating.

“Aerial Ace!” Contact move, their best chance-

“Bite!” Rose tried, bless her, twisting and lunging in the direction of the approaching bird, but Spearow were faster by their very nature and she was barely able to close her teeth around the end of it’s tail as it collided with her, yanking out a few feathers when she tumbled aside with a whine. Kevin’s stomach dropped as from just the one blow she struggled to return to her feet.

“Again, Spearow!”

“Tackle!” Again the Spearow dove, and this time Rose threw herself forward to meet it, releasing a cry when they collided and the bird’s momentum overpowered her own. For the second time she was sent tumbling, skidding over the boundary line to Kevin’s right as the breath caught in his throat. She whimpered, and didn’t rise again.

It was only barely that Kevin heard one of the gym trainers declare Flying Master Akash and and his Spearow the victors.

#fanfic #kevin levin #the fic with no name #poor babies

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ohscorbus · 6 years ago

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Harry Potter and the Cursed Child: Saturday 16th June, 2018

This isn’t a super long recap, just a couple of little things I really loved (mostly about act four) and wanted to gush about! By which I mean half of these points turn into rambling headcanons and this is actually well over 2k words long. I should probably apologise now... *whispers* I have a lot of feelings, okay?

Act Three, Scene One

“So we can continue our work together?” “We can” - It’s always been difficult to imagine Scorpius ever being the Scorpion King, and Jonathan’s Scorpius even more so. Yet today I truly saw the Scorpion King on stage for the first time. It was so jarring. Jonathan has such a baby face. His Scorpius is the definition of precious. Yet when he lowered his chin and his voice as he spoke to Umbridge, their was a flash of something. It was dangerous and sinister. It only lasted a second or two each time, but it was there. It was frightening how he could slip into that, but a relief that he couldn’t hold it. It’s not who he is but clearly it’s there within him.

Act Three, Scene Twenty

Jonathan was so great to watch in the torture scene today. He was getting so angry with Delphi. I love the way his voice dropped as he spoke back to her. He’ll stand up for himself and defend his friend even if it kills him. That anger, that fight inside of him… in the most unexpected turn of events, it’s Jonathan’s Scorpius who I can see the Scorpion King in the most. (Or at least aspects of him. It doesn’t seem like an impossible jump anymore.) He may look like a sweet sunshine child but make no mistake, he’s a Malfoy and he’ll protect what’s his at any cost. For example, despite having been tortured several times himself, the second Delphi goes to raise her wand at Albus to hit him with a crucio, Scorpius immediately leapt up and tried to get in between them despite being bound and injured himself. There was zero hesitation here. Even when he stumbled, he got straight back up and moved towards him again. It was a selfless act as well as one of pure defiance against Delphi. I was beaming with pride. Now this is the Scorpius people don’t see. The one Scorpius wishes his dad knew about. It’s sad because this is Scorpius. It defines so much about his character. I hope Draco learns about it one day. I also hope Albus acknowledges it at some point. I don’t know how you even go about thanking someone for doing that. But if anyone can, it’s Albus. Oh! Also, imagine Albus and Draco talking about Scorpius one day and Draco thanking Albus for looking out for his son or something. But then Albus being like, ‘Me??? He was the one who protected me.’ Now that’s a conversation...

Act Four, Scene Three

“My geekiness is a-quivering” - (Jonathan is still saying geekiness not geekness ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ) Scorpius was flailing so hard he was at the point of passing out. Bless him. So Albus comes running over and stands in front of Scorpius and says, “Scorpius, breathe”, and as he does, he’s raised his hands up and slowly lowers them in hopes Scorpius will breathe out in time with him. He did, and it was brilliant. He had those breathing exercises ready to go which makes me believe this isn’t the first time he’s had to do this. Amazing. Such nerds. I LOVE THEM.

Act Four, Scene Eight

"You know about Delphi?” - So right before this, the boys are asked where Delphi is and Scorpius tries to respond but struggles. You see, Jonathan’s Scorpius has a bit of a stutter and he tends to restart his sentences and stumbles over words. I love it because it adds a whole new layer to Scorpius. This nervous, lonely kid who’s bullied and gossiped about by children and adults alike, and now he has this to deal with too. What’s worse is that none of the above are going to help him overcome his problem either. If anything, they exacerbate the issue. The contrast between him and his dad is also interesting. Draco is such a Malfoy, a real smooth talker. I’m sure watching his son grow up and struggle with his speech must have been difficult for them both. It’s another hurdle they would have had to overcome. But anyway, back to my point. When Scorpius was trying to talk here today, Draco stood next to him and just like everyone else, was eager to hear what was going on. This is vital information! But when Scorpius started to stutter, Draco started nodding his head along with him. Not in anger or out of frustration, but in an encouraging kind of way. I couldn’t tell you what happened much after this because I was lost in a world of headcanons. Of Draco’s concern, of Astoria’s support, and of their joint effort to help him in any way they could. I have no shame in admitting that it had me in tears. I haven’t seen Draco acknowledge his son’s stutter before and I never realised how much I needed it. This tiny little thing said so much about their father-son relationship. Especially since it was after their hug. It was like getting a glimpse into their lives outside of Hogwarts.

This is what I adore about James Howard. He takes those few and far between moments in the script and adds so much richness to it. He’s a true blessing to this play.

Act Four, Scene Nine

This is such a weird thing to notice but I myself am weird so here goes… you know in St. Jerome’s when Albus is asleep on the pew while Ginny and Harry are talking? Well Albus is always completely still, but today Joe moved slightly. I think he was simply readjusting his head (books don’t make good pillows whatever Scorpius says) but it made me think of an old ‘what if?’ I had. So once upon a time I suggested that maybe Albus wasn’t actually asleep in this scene. He’s merely pretending and ends up listening in to his parents conversation. I don’t think he is, but can you imagine if he was? Albus listening to his dad talking about how he does love him specifically. That he loves him to such an extend he understands how you could repel the spell of death (a spell Albus has now witnessed firsthand). His dad listening to his mum for advice just as he himself probably has over the years. Because ‘dad is pretty complicated’ so I’m sure he’s had many conversations with her about him over the years. Again, I don’t think he is listening in but reading/watching that scene with that in mind makes it super interesting. The later scenes too. Albus awkwardly looking at his dad after the ‘there’s plenty of things you’re good at’ line. Albus would understand what that’s about. It isn’t ‘right’ but he would finally see that his dad is trying. Then Albus standing up for his dad to Draco. He doesn’t quite know what he’s doing either but if his dad is trying then so can he. They share a small smile after this by the way and it warms my heart immensely. As does Hermione and Ginny knowingly smiling at each other and Harry.

Talking of ‘what if’s, you know in Deathly Hallows when Hermione falls asleep on the sofa and Ron on the floor and Harry sees them in the morning and they’ve clearly fallen asleep holding hands? Well... imagine this with Albus and Scorpius in the church. Albus is on a pew and Scorpius has collected every single cushion he can find to make a bed on the floor beside him (he’s too tall to fit longways on the bench). Imagine the adults finding them some time later and noticing how their arms have fallen, clearly meaning they were at some point most likely holding hands. Now that’s a conversation I’m sure either of them want to overhear right now. Because it isn’t about that.

It doesn’t stop Ron saying ‘bloody hell’ as he stumbles upon them. Or Hermione’s knowing smile. Or Draco’s initial internalised panic before he’s overwhelmed by relief at his son’s happiness. Or Harry experiencing déjà vu and not knowing what to do about anything. Or Ginny smacking Ron as he boosts about his love potion while she tries to contain her own delight. Because she knows right now, this doesn’t mean much more than two best friends holding onto each other for support (and probably out of fear the other will disappear as soon as they close their eyes). But she’s got a feeling it probably won’t stay this way...

Act Four, Scene Ten

So while Ron and Draco are winding each other up in the church, I decided to watch Albus since this act is Joe’s strongest. He did not disappoint. When Ron first said ‘zap her’, Albus looked across at him and smiled and nodded along. His face screamed ‘yeeeah!’, he was clearly very onboard with this ‘masterful’ plan. But then Draco laughed at the plan and pointed out it’s flaws and Albus turned to look at him and instantly changed his allegiance. He stopped getting excited over Ron’s plan and looked far more serious and started nodding along with Draco. I absolutely LOVED IT. I loved it because you got to see two sides of Albus so clearly. Because there’s aspects of Ron and Draco in his personality. He’s impulsive and funny, yet all dry humour and pure resourcefulness. (His plans are spectacular when he puts his mind to it.) So it was brilliant to watch him flit between the two so quickly.

Personally, I think these two influence Albus a lot. Or at least have in the past and will do in the future. They’re important to him. I think the way Albus runs up the stairs towards Ron in the other timeline when he’s frustrated by Harry says a lot. It makes you wonder how often he’s done that. Gone to his uncle Ron for sweets and a joke because they’re easier to ask for than support. It’s a thing they do. A code. Then of course Draco’s influence will come much later. I have no doubt about that. They’re so alike and have common interests. Although right now he’s probably just 1000% aware he no doubt blames him just slightly for dragging his son into this. He wants to make a better impression (he’s Scorpius’s dad after all) and besides, Albus is a Slytherin. He understands Draco’s logic over Ron’s Gryffindor style plan any day. (It must be nice, having grown up surrounded by Gryffindors, to finally be around an adult Slytherin.) But yeah... to see Albus stood in between these two and connect with them both was everything.

Act Four, Scene Eleven

“You’ll always be an orphan. That never leaves you.” - From the angle I was sat, I could see Scorpius perfectly over Harry’s shoulder for this line and oh boy was that interesting. So as soon as Harry says this line, Scorpius instantly looked at Harry and the look on his face broke my heart. Now I know he’s not an orphan, but it was like he was understanding that the loss of his mother was a pain that was never going to go away. It’s something that will stay with him forever, and that’s something he’s going to have to process. I feel like deep down he knew this already but hearing Harry Potter confirm it out loud clearly affected him. It only lasts a moment before he remembers where he is and what’s happening. He then quickly broke his stare and looked down at the ground. It was such a fleeting moment but it said so much about Scorpius. I guess with Albus not talking about her much and the topic being one Draco can’t seem to broach with him, having it said so plainly in front of him gave him no choice but to face it. But then after everything he’s just gone through, maybe it’s an approach he won’t hesitate so much over in the future?

Act Four, Scene Twelve

“And there’s nothing I can do to stop him” “That’s not true” - Draco’s line was said in a slightly different tone today but that’s not what threw me. It was the fact Draco flicked his robe back and reached for his wand. I have never, ever seen a Draco do that before and I was in shock. (Or at least never so aggressively? That’s what caught my eye. The forcefulness with which he did it.) Because what could he have done? Gone after Voldemort himself? I could understand that on some level. For his childhood and for how it’s still affecting his son’s life. But then Scorpius reached over and put his hand on him and said, “Dad, now is not the time”, and he stopped. It was like it hit him where he was and who he was now. You could see the effect Scorpius has had on him. His whole body changed as he realised what he instinctively wanted to do and what he needed to do where totally different because he was different now. (I wonder how that felt? Having those feelings take over so quickly. I wonder if Scorpius has similar fears with the Scorpion King? I wonder if when/how Draco and Scorpius discuss this?!) The fact he then spends every second of the rest of this scene holding Scorpius so tightly in his arms to comfort him tells you everything you need to know about who Draco is now. This is how this man protects his son, by putting his needs first. Nothing shows how much he’s grown like this scene does.

While it was a super interesting choice for this scene, I’m not sure I could take it every time. My heart stopped beating for a second there. I mean, let’s face it. Draco would no doubt lose a duel against Voldemort. But I guess that glimpse of the old Draco was intriguing. But orphaning his son is not an option. Revenge, fear, justice. Those instincts mean nothing compared to what his son means to him.

I have to say, it reminded me a lot of Albus. Albus is headstrong and fuelled by his need to defend Scorpius during the torture scene, yet one gesture/word from Scorpius and it stops him. That parallel is fascinating. I’ve always said those two are more alike than they realise right now. But once they get to know each other they’ll be a force to be reckoned with.

Act Four, Scene Fifteen

“That heart is a good one” - As Harry said this, he pointed at Albus’s heart and a second later, it was like Albus realised what his dad was saying and instantly got a little bit embarrassed by the compliment. He quickly zipped up his hoodie and turned round away from his dad to hide and Harry laughed so much. Albus, realising everything is surprisingly okay between them, turns back to face his dad and gives him a shy little smile. It was adorably sweet. My heart...

The Harry and Albus hug at the very end hit me right in the feels. Harry reached his arm round Albus’s back and Albus looked down at his dad’s hand on his shoulder and smiled. He then rested his head on his dad’s shoulder and pretty much tucked himself into his chest. They both looked so happy. Harry then put his other arm round Albus and brought them into a proper hug and as the lights went down, I cried like the little girl that I am. These Potters have a lot to answer for.

#harry potter and the cursed child #cursed child play #this is very draco heavy and it's all james's fault #TCCleanne

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estie-ellie · 6 years ago

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so this is a thing i have been working on

it’s a story with my oc and katey’s oc AND SURPRISE it’s not damie and maggie. i did some tweaking and minor edits, but i can’t quite get the rest on the page atm... any feedback is really helpful. keep in mind too that there’s a huge skip forward in story, because i usually write out of order okby

Day 1: .My dad’s friend Damien came over for dinner last night. My dad knows him through work, but he feels like a distant uncle. He’s pretty cool. My dad mentioned once that he was gay and that I shouldn’t ask any personal questions because it wasn’t polite (and that he was special like me, but he doesn’t look like one)

Since he’s the only adult I know who is both Not My Parents and Not Straight, I asked him what I should do if I was confused.. about everything. He told me to write it down, be honest. If I can write truth, eventually I’ll see it for myself. Here’s hoping..

Day 5: Two weeks after the dance, I found out. He told me after we practiced swimming. That was a month ago. Everything seems so blurry and messy and strained. How do you be honest, if you don’t know what you’re doing? What is this? Why can’t it be simple? I want you to be my friend. I want to make you laugh and smile. I want to hold your hand. I want to be close. I want to press my lips against your skin. But I shouldn’t want all of that, I should just want to be friends. Right?

Day 7: In study hall, he sat next to me and smiled. My heart skipped and I couldn’t breathe right. Even though we spent the period together, it felt like he was floating away. Come back and stay. Come stay. I don’t need to breathe.

Day 9: We walked to the bus in silence. Hey are you mad? I was so scared he’d say yes. No. He didn’t look at me. Oh. Good. Do you want to hang out tomorrow? No. I’m kinda tired. I think I’ll stay in. Oh.. Okay.. I’ll talk to you later. Yeah.

He walked off and I waited for my bus alone.

Day 15: He hasn’t talked to me in five days. We got paired up in lit. We sat in silence and did our worksheets by ourselves. I tried to apologize. The bell rang, he didn’t hear me.

I don’t know what I’m sorry for.

Day 17: I caught him in the hallway at his locker. I wanted to kiss at edges of his frown. He didn’t see me. In lit he said “pass me the handout”. His hand brushed mine and my stomach ached. It was like being homesick.

Day 20: He said ‘hi’ in homeroom when he sat down. It was the last seat. I tried to keep quiet. “Do you think we’ll have group work in lit?” he shrugged and turned the other way. I watched his back scrunch and tighten.

Day 24: He found me behind the quad with Taylor and Christian wailing on me.

What the fuck, Kai? He looked disgusted.

Called you a bitch. My words were bloody.

We’re not friends anymore.

He got me to my bus stop and left without a word. His fingertips burned more sinister than the bruises.

Day 25: He looked at me with pity. Like I was a dog about to be put down. He sat down next to Hazel in homeroom. Hazel looked up at me like I was stabbing them both in the back. ‘I’m sorry’ I wanted to say. I’m sorry. All my fault, I’m so sorry. I laid my head in my arms where the bruises wouldn’t touch.

Day 28: Picked another fight, this time nobody to stop it. Brand new bruises to replace the old ones. More punishment; need to repent somehow. I’m the reason they talk about him. I’m the reason we’re not friends. Just wish in the fights they would aim lower though. It’s hard to look my parents in the eye with a bloody face. They’re worried. My grades are still the same. Except history. He used to help me with it. They don’t know what to do.

I don’t either.

Day 40: Everyone avoids me. Either because I look like a loser, they heard I was a loser, or because they already know I’m a lost cause. It’s okay. It’s the right idea.

Day 51: It’s hard to pick fights. Even the most sadistic, special-hating barbarians are bored. Got their fill. Won’t look at me. The game’s not fun. Old news. Not even worth the effort. I’m invisible.

Day 57: Bruises are healing. Feathers are growing back. My parents look relieved when I come home free of new blemishes, no bloody clothes to clean. When I’m home, mom checks in on me every now and again, I try to act like I’m reading or playing games. Dad opens my door at night when he thinks I’m asleep. Homework is still done, dinner is still eaten. I’m mild and cooperative. They are confused. I don’t want to make it any harder on them. I don’t want them to worry. I wish I knew how to fix everything. I am breaking everything. I am broken, too.

Day 64: We have started to change seats each period. In lit, I am off to the left in the back. He sits in front with Allison and Liam: new friends. When he smiles and laughs, I let myself pretend we are back in his room playing video games, in my backyard on the grass. That his smiles and laughter is because of me. I look away before I feel nauseous. Before I can cry.

Day 68: All the bruises are gone. At least, the worst of them. Some of them are slight and small on my chest and shins. No more fights to pick, no taunts to tip. Everyone avoids me or has forgotten. That was inevitable. It’s better that way though, I think. It’s better for him. But what do I do now?

Day 69: He wasn’t in school today. I think he got sick. After math, Hazel caught me by his locker. I only stopped a second. She noticed me staring. You have to stop, Kai. She grabbed my arm to pull me aside. I know. I don’t think you do. Everything that’s happened… You can’t keep doing this. I know. She wavered, as if my words set her on a balance beam. She looked at me as if she couldn’t tell whether I understood. Don’t worry, I know I ruined everything. I know I need to stay away.

She backed away, tugging her books to her chest. Take care of yourself. She took one last look and walked away.

Day 72: Swim season starts in a couple days. Eli, the varsity captain, begged me to stay on the team. I told him I’d think about it. I hadn’t actually thought about swim season at all this year until he asked why my name wasn’t on the sign up sheet. I’ll probably stay on. Swimming is the only thing I might do right. Maybe. Day 79: Swim season starts today. My body welcomes the water, but my muscles reject the work. Haven’t practiced, mechanics are off, flip turns too early. I push anyway. I push until my lungs ache and my limbs cramp. At home, I collapse in bed, body too weak, lungs too tired. When I sleep, I don’t dream and I’m grateful. Day 86: It’s hard to focus in the downtime between school and practice. At home it’s worse. Hours to myself, nothing to do. At least before I had bruises to tend. Day 92: I saw him at the park on my way home from the deli. He was on the swings, talking to two of his friends and smiling. I don’t think any of them saw me. I rushed toward home with my head down. He’s happy without you.

Without you, he’s happy.

Day 97: I skinned my knee on the floor of the pool. For the rest of the day, it ached and itched and bled, and before I knew it I was home in bed and I hadn’t been thinking of him.

Day 101: I always wondered why people would cut. I thought it was too extreme, stupid, a futile attempt at comfort. I get it now though. If you can zero in on the pain, the world is blotted out. It’s easy to numb out all the other thoughts if pain is controlling you. I won’t go overboard. I just need something to pick at. If it aches, I can get through the day.

Day 112: The cuts are easy to hide with our trunks and briefs, but I went too high this time. I had to lie and say I got it while working outside with my dad. It wasn’t a hard sell, and we went back to flip turn drills. Day 115: Between practice and homework I’ve been pushing myself farther and harder. It’s the only way I don’t break down. In our meet against Northtown High, I beat three of my records. Wish it was good enough to fix everything else. Day 118: After practice, some of the team went out for pizza. I tried to get out of it, but Eli wouldn’t let me. My mom was elated that I was invited anywhere and handed me thirty bucks with an enthusiastic wave goodbye from the minivan. When we got there, Eli gathered our party to sing praises of our previous glory and especially gossip about the hottest girls that came to cheer us on. I smiled and laughed at the right times, but it felt like lying to say that I was interested in anyone who had shown up. ---

I don’t know why I’m going to this party. I have nothing better, I guess. Maybe there’ll be booze. --- Kai walked inside the mini mansion that was Eli’s home. The party was still in full swing, music pumping throughout the house and conspicuous red cups floating from hand to hand. He decided he had to pick a safe spot, someplace he could be without attracting attention to himself. Kai went alone after all, he needed the cover. The kitchen was too obvious. Too many transactions of alcohol, not enough to stay and graze off of the assortment of snacks and finger food. In the back, a grill was being manhandled by a member of the football team while a few boys and girls on the swim team hugged the edges of a massive pool. The yard was adorned with buckets of ice topped with various cans and bottles of beer. Kai made his way out and grabbed a bottle, clipped the top with his keys, and retreated inside to investigate further.

From time to time he passed a teammate or an acquaintance that would draw his attention for a moment, but conversations didn’t linger. Kai was glad to have a distraction, though. The booze was finally hitting him and he floated around until settling in the family room in the basement. It was lit in soft yellow candle light, which was probably for function as much as it was aesthetic; it covered the scent of alcohol with a light vanilla puff. He figured the party would settle down and he could leave, Eli & Co. happy that their fellow teammate showed up for once.

And the party did in fact wind down. Couples eventually left, clumps of friends relocated to various parts of the house, and the backyard became a haven for dimly lit poolside make out sessions. This meant that the couch Kai had been inhabiting soon became possession of a clump of kids in his grade slowly approaching, talking among themselves.

“You mind if we..” A boy from the group--Nate, Kai recalled-- extended his hand which grasped a bottle of liquor, towards the coffee table in front of Kai’s feet. Kai nodded and scooted to the end of the couch as the group closed in on the living space. He hadn’t quite realized who exactly was in the group, until he Hazel emerged from the back of the group with Gabe in tow.

"Hey, maybe we shoul-,“ she began. “It’s ok, I’ll leave,” Kai gathered himself up quickly. He avoided their gaze as he was about to move away. “Stay,” Gabe’s voice piped up, as they sat across Kai in a loveseat next to Nate. Kai’s eye’s shot up to Gabe and halted. Hazel looked wearily to Gabe, sharing an silent exchange of permission. “It’s okay,” Gabe replied finally.

Kai looked to from Gabe to Hazel, the ultimate approval resting with her. She looked to Gabe. She nodded once in affirmation. The exchange took mere seconds but Kai had felt like an hour past. He silently sat back down and took a swig of his drink. The rest of the group seemed unfazed by the microcosm and readied themselves for their drinking game. Evidently it was "Truth or Drink”. There was no dare involved; the dare was inherently “get wrecked on Costco brand liquor”. Kai mostly tuned out the noise, the soft snickers and cackling from his party-mates, the clinks of shot glasses. He only made noise enough to apologize when his foot hit Mark Elsen’s who had taken up a spot on the couch next to him.

It seemed like they were having a good time, already a couple rounds in. A few beers in himself, Kai was pleasantly buzzed. The peaceful calm of the booze melted his tension, and for the first time that night, Kai allowed himself to enjoy the party. It was nice to see Gabe smiling, laughing. Nate had his arm wrapped around Gabe’s shoulders and they swayed back and forth with a giggle from Hazel’s joke. The yellow light danced in the chesnut browns in their hair. He had forgotten how pretty it was.

“What about you?” Mark tapped his shot glass to Kai’s shoulder. “Hmwha?” Kai’s trance was broken and the group looked to him expectantly. “Have you ever cheated on a test?” Mark repeated. Kai looked to Hazel and Gabe again, searching for permission to speak. His eyes fell back to Mark, “A couple times, I guess. On spelling tests, I think.” “That’s pretty lame, man,” Nate replied, pouring shots into the empty glasses, now an additional shot sitting for Kai. “Okay, Hazel. Your turn.” She dutifully began to think of a question and when she came

#my writing #gabe and kai

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snowharvester-blog · 7 years ago

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What I Wanted To Say

Summary:

Modern/AU verse. The hardest part of having a best friend? Falling for him, but what are you gonna do when he likes your cousin? Multiple pairings, main Jelsa.

There he goes again, looking at her with affection in his light blue eyes.

Elsa Freyis squirmed in her seat when an uncomfortable lurch in her stomach grew as she pressed her pen on her paper harder than needed. She would have laughed at her predicament if she wasn't the one involved. To have any romantic problems in high school was usually beneath her, deeming it to be a fickle and fleeting moment of infatuation that was caused by teenage hormones. But as she gave a sideways glance at Jack Frost; it wasn't about hormones at all.

"-and voila! You just made your prototype for a cherry bomb!" Their chemistry teacher, Mr. Mind laughed triumphantly as he held up the potent concoction for his students to see. The room was suddenly alive with the murmurs of excitement and awe. Some were whispers concerning the mental health of their instructor. Elsa caught the nervous eye of her classmate, Hiccup Haddock, and sighed. It's time to play the role of the responsible student again.

"Mr. Mind?"

The bulbous-headed man with a goatee waved a hand to her direction for a dramatic flair, "Yes Ms. Freyis? I take it you're fascinated by the things that go 'BOOM!' so your finals will be to make a batch of cherry bombs-"

She shook her head, her light blond hair tied in a tight braid bun and her fair face was the epitome of seriousness that was absent on most adolescence's faces. "Producing something that goes… 'boom' can lead to a disastrous result, especially since all forms of explosives are illegal in this country, let alone this school."

There was a chorus of groans and the boy wearing a blue hoodie beside her gave a mock glare and whispered, "Aww, Elsa don't be a killjoy!"

Yes, she was the class nagger but she's also the Student Council president and she will not have a pile of papers containing an accident in her class sitting on her desk and explain to the headmaster how the incident happened, she disliked paperwork.

Mr. Mind gave it some thought and with a huff, he replied "Fi~ne, we'll just talk about the bonding of atoms and memorize the periodic table for your finals."

Elsa didn't let the looks of anger and irritation most of her classmates gave faze her and as soon as the bell rang, she collected her things in her bag and walked out the chemistry lab to her next class. Light footsteps followed her and she didn't need to look to know it was Jack. His scent was icy, it was like breathing into a freezer and no matter what season it is, it remained the same. "Way to kill the fun Sunshine" he grumbled and slung his backpack on his shoulder.

"I'd rather 'kill the fun' than tend to your bleeding hands inside a hospital room," she said in a matter-of-factly tone. Her cheeks suddenly grew warm when he placed a hand on her shoulder and gave it a small squeeze.

"I didn't know you actually cared" he teased. She cleared her throat and kept her eyes straight, ignoring the funny looks everyone else gave them. It was still a shock to some people that the uptight and well-mannered young woman was friends with the notorious resident white-haired prankster/incurable troublemaker.

"Elsa! Jack! Wait for me!"

Elsa didn't want to but it would be rude for her to ignore her cousin who was bounding up to them with a bubbly grin on her face. Rapunzel was a free-spirited girl who had an artistic flair. She immediately noticed how Jack beamed as she got closer to them. The young woman with unimaginatively long golden hair gave them a bright smile which he immediately returned while Elsa gave a hesitant nod, "Rapunzel."

"Hey, I just talked to the teachers about doing an art exhibit and they said yes!" she said in an excited tone but giggled a bit when she addressed Elsa, "But I think you already know that."

"Yes, they've already discussed this with the council. We've already calculated the funds so that we still have enough expenses to cover the school fair" Elsa answered, all too aware that Jack wanted to have a conversation with her. There was a twist in her stomach as her subtle stare lingered to his face before turning back to her cousin, "And we also think it's a great idea to let every student explore their artistic side."

"So, uh Blondie" Jack interjected, "What are you gonna do for the exhibition anyway?"

His simple question was quickly replied with an eager explanation of murals and overlapping pictures. Rapunzel was so engrossed with her vision and with Jack being too engrossed to her; Elsa was able to slip quietly away without being noticed. As she walked to the cafeteria to look for Anna, she looked over her shoulder one more time and her heart squeezed painfully at the sight of the two of them.

"Elsie... why don't you just tell Jack about, Y'know, that you liked him?" Anna asked as she scooped up more chocolate ice cream from the carton she and her sister were sharing. It was their Saturday afternoon routine; they would lounge about in Elsa's room and watch a movie or talk about their week with a handful of junk food their parents wouldn't approve of.

Elsa looked up from the book she was reading and stared at Anna like she was crazy. "What are you talking about?" She tried to play dumb, knowing how Anna can get when the topic's about love and crushes. She calls herself the 'love expert', except the sixteen-year-old never had any relationship experiences and based all her pieces of advice from all the movies and teen magazines she and Rapunzel were obsessed with. Whenever they have a sleepover, Merida will always try to escape their wrath of nail polish and teen quizzes by climbing out of the window while Elsa would try to control the situation.

Anna snorted as she swallowed the chocolate treat, "Please, I know you like Jack. I mean like-like kind of like. I think you guys look cute together."

A rush of warmth covered her cheeks, blushing at her sister's words. She cleared her throat, "Just because we 'look cute together', it doesn't mean that it will happen."

Anna's smile faltered for a moment before sudden realization dawned in her blue eyes, "So you do like Jack!"

Elsa froze with her spoon halfway to her lips; she just fell into a trap. She sighed and lowered the silverware, "Of course I like him, it will be difficult for me to be friends with someone I didn't like."

"You know what I mean" Anna grumbled "This is big news! I'd never thought that you'll have a crush on someone, especially on Jack. Uh- not that he's a bad guy or anything!" she squeaked out.

"I know what you mean," Elsa said, "He's... flighty."

And that word just scratched the surface of a fifty-foot thick block that described Jack Frost. He was a whirlwind of energy, like the wind; he comes and goes whenever he likes, which also meant that he had no problems cutting classes in school.

He was a loner, always preferred to fly solo but he was still popular to everyone because of his friendly personality. Both the students in their year and the lower ones seemed to follow his every move, especially the female population. Elsa was more than aware that he was good-looking though not in the princely type that Anna swoons to. He was more of the lean, roguish type- a classic rebel without a cause. But her attraction to him wasn't like a good girl falls for bad boy stereotype. He was a gentle soul, he had charisma and he simply loved playing with kids. He made it a priority to stop by the playground and bring a football so they can all have fun.

Although the adults, more specifically Vice Principal Pitch Black had less than positive opinions about him and she wouldn't lie; she shared the same opinion before they became friends.

She was always the stickler for the rules and going against the said rules was like blaspheme in her book. When she was a child, most of her parents' friends would look at her and say, "What a responsible young lady!" Her parents' face would light up whenever she did something perfect. So she strived to make them happy; always on the honour roll, enrolling in a vocal class in summer and joining several groups in the community like a perfect citizen.

But whenever she was with her friends, it didn't matter whether she was perfect or not. They don't care if she blundered something up and they will help her get back up with a smile on their faces.

Anna hummed thoughtfully before she eyes Elsa's hair with distaste, "Elsie, don't you wanna change your hairstyle? It makes you look... old."

The older sibling traced her bun with her fingers and took a deep breath, "This hairstyle is convenient for me."

"But it's boring" Anna pouted, "I think you'll be prettier with a French knot or a side braid. Jack might like it y'know. You're already pretty so why not upgrade your look? You can even grow out your hair like Rapunzel's!"

"I don't to be pretty!" Elsa weakly protested, "I don't want him to notice me just because I will look like Ra-" Elsa immediately closed her mouth and speared her spoon through a large mound of ice cream.

Anna bit her lower lip after she realized that she hit a rather sore spot. Rapunzel's pretty in her own way; she was strong-willed and optimistic while Elsa's more in a mature and sophisticated light. The strawberry blond threw her arms around her sister's shoulders and gave it a tight squeeze,

"I'm not saying you should change yourself Elsie, not into Rapunzel or to anyone. I just wanted other people to see the real you like how I do and you know what?"

"What?" Elsa asked

"The real Elsa's just waiting for the time to show them her true colours. You can't change yourself to please people like what you're doing for mama and papa, you can just be the best you can and do what makes you happy."

The wisdom of her usually clumsy sister's words struck a chord with her. A stirring, a yearning to drop the mask and show them her true self was empowering her. Elsa gently pinched her sister's freckled cheek, "When did you get so wise?"

"English class, we watched a film that contained so many metaphors and people who stood up on their tables quoting 'Captain, My Captain'" she whined. Elsa gave a small breathless laugh before she returned to her book, "It would be better if he will never know."

Anna blinked in confusion as a frown settled on her lips, "Huh? Why's that?"

"Because if he only liked me as a friend; things will be awkward if I told him. I don't to lose Jack as a friend and besides… he already likes someone else."

The change started out small but for Elsa, it was life-changing. It wasn't her intention to wear her hair down since Anna hid all her bobby pins that held her hair in their usual bun so she had no choice but to tie her hair down.

She tried a low ponytail but she suddenly saw Rapunzel's reflection staring at her that she yanked the rubber band off. Finally, she tied her hair into a side braid and constantly blew a lock of hair that fell over her left eye. Thankfully Anna didn't touch her clothes because she was comfortable with them; they were conservative yet stylish with her personal flair. Anna didn't try and make her wear those miniskirts, revealing tops and extremely high heels that threatened to break her feet if she took a single step.

Before the first class, she bumped into Jack and Hiccup by the halls. She couldn't hear what they were talking about but she was almost sure it involved a prank and Hiccup will try and talk the prankster out of it.

"Hey Elsa" Hiccup greeted, "You look... different. A good kind of different" he immediately added.

Jack finally turned around and furrowed a brow at her, "What's with your hair?" She suddenly felt conscious and tugged at the end of the braid, "Just trying something new" before she composed herself and straightened her posture. "That better not be stink bombs in there" she warned, her eyes gave a pointed stare at Jack's locker.

Jack just gave a casual shrug, "Can't say that I'll promise you anything"

A small throb on her temple made her roll her eyes at him and crossed her arms, "I expect you to be in class today. I won't cover your absence again like the last time."

"Can't you just give me a hall pass or something?" he pleaded, using his 'charm'.

"I'm not going abuse my authority" she grounded out "Like I've said, attend all your classes especially Geometry, we have a test today."

Jack was about to retort when she beat him to it,

"And if you ever tried to play the 'I'm sick' card, I can just ask Professor Doppler to give you a special exam. An even harder one" she threatened.

Jack glared at her and crossed his arms, "You wouldn't"

"Try me"

They held a glaring contest, both forgot that Hiccup was still there before Jack gave in and grumbled, "Fine. You're such a mother hen, you know that?" before he turned his back on her to resume his conversation with Hiccup.

Elsa just smirked and started to walk to the classroom, unaware that Jack peeked at her retreating back over his shoulder.

The art exhibit was an instant hit for everyone.

Elsa had never seen almost half of the student body immersed in a single event. Many had submitted their project proposals and some had even reserved the rooms to showcase their works. Although there had been some strenuous talks with the creative side of some students like the trio Lock, Shock and Barrel who thought it would be a great idea to present smushed bugs and hang them on the ceiling with piano strings.

Then there was the Crood girl who wanted to set up caveman murals all over the campus which sounded like a good idea until it involved mud and actual live animals that will leave prints so that it will be… authentic. Anna decided to make a large snow globe where the snow will be Styrofoam and the snowman was glued to the bottoms of the platform.

Merida didn't really make anything but presented a beautiful wood carving of a life-sized bear which made their woodshop teacher, Ralph, approved despite it wasn't her own work. Hiccup just helped the students set up their projects, saying that he wasn't the artsy type and promised her that he will participate in the Annual Science Fair Competition against the other towns and bring a gold trophy for their school. Finally, Elsa placed her own model; tiny transparent crystals were hung to the wooden by a transparent nylon. At first, Anna was confused on how it came together but as soon as the light hits the crystals, a shimmering multi-coloured snowflake was formed on the board, leaving the younger Freyis at awe. Leave it to Elsa to use her knowledge in Geometry to create something beautiful.

A small chuckle came from her left side and saw Jack holding a diorama. His was even more impressive. Miniature models of her and their friends were there wearing costumes inside a fictional world that he created. Elsa spotted a particular model and giggled, "Is that Hiccup riding a dragon?" Jack laughed as well as he swung the tiny black dragon with the tip of his finger "I think Mr. Nerdy-pants would like this."

She looked closely at other models. There was a miniature Anna wearing a winter dress with a snowman beside her and even a figurine of a girl wearing a long green dress; her hair was depicted as a messy bundle of red yarn with an angry scowl on her face. Merida wouldn't be happy about this one, she concluded. Then, there was a tower that was covered with vines and flowers. A girl whose golden hair flowed down to the ground and there was a smile on her face. She wore a simple yet princess-y lilac dress.

It didn't take a genius to know that it was Rapunzel. Elsa could feel her frown was beginning to show before he pointed at the opposite side of the diorama. There stood a castle was supposedly made of ice and she gasped when she saw herself. The tiny Elsa had the same side braid and she was covered with a blue off-shoulder dress and a cape stood by a paper balcony. Her face was looking up and Elsa saw that it was facing the crescent moon where the miniature Jack was sitting on it with a staff on hand and his trademark blue hoodie was nearly impossible to miss.

It was beautiful.

"You're really hard to make" Jack commented as he watched her observed the castle in great detail, "Your hair's got that braid thingy and I thought it will be good to put you into an ice castle or something."

"Why ice?" she asked, "Are saying that I'm cold?" True, she wasn't exactly the warmest person compared to her friends but it still hurt when someone had called her 'ice queen' behind her back just because she told them off or lectured them when they broke any school rules.

Jack's eyes widened and shook his head, "That's not what I meant! You just told me before that you love winter so I figured why not make you the Snow Queen?"

"The Snow Queen's an evil sorceress, Jack" Elsa explained which caused a momentary expression of misunderstanding on his face.

"But I thought she was the main character?" he said. Elsa just shook her head and straightened herself from her bending. There were butterflies in her stomach as she studied the Snow Queen looking at the white-haired boy on the moon. He put in so much effort on making that, if only he put that much effort into studying so his grade point average would be better than a B-.

Jack placed his diorama next to her snowflake prism and played with the hanging crystals. She leaned her back on the table and closely watched him. His youthful face was filled in with a strong jowl and his eyes brows were dark brown, hinting his natural hair colour. His nose was defined and his lips were thin and always chapped, finally his eyes; the facial feature of his that attracted her to him the most. They were covered with long thick lashes that women, including her, could only achieve by means of mascara and the stunning icy blue colour that ranges from the shade of the sky to a deep cornflower blue. Whenever he looked at her with sincerity and even an amused light; her heart can't help but hammer against her chest cavity.

He was everything she was not. Outwardly cheerful and playful, friendly and outspoken, the antithesis of how she was brought up to be. But he once said that he found her uptightness amusing, if not endearing.

"Sunshine, I know I'm good-looking but you're making me self-conscious."

His cheeky grin forced Elsa to flinch and turned away; all too aware that there was a deep blush that covered her face. The possibilities of him finding out about her attraction to him had now increased. She froze when he threw his arm around her shoulders and gave it another affectionate squeeze like he always does,

"Aaaw you're blushing!" he teased "You're real cute when you act like that"

Did he just flirt with her?

The heat on her cheeks returned tenfold and she wouldn't be surprised if there was smoke coming out of her ears. She was his female best friend and he was her closest male friend so sometimes teasing was normal, though he was the one doing it and in turn, she would just mother the heck out of him. The closest thing they ever did to flirting was playful banter and again, he was the one instigating it. If that was so… did that mean he liked her too?

'Take a chance!' a voice inside her said 'Don't let fear control you'

So Elsa took a deep breath as she spun around to face him and gently peeled his arm off of her, ignoring his concerned frown as she breathed in deeply and said, "Jack, I have something to tell you-"

At that very moment, huge collective gasps were heard from the other side of the room. Rapunzel had just unveiled her own art; it was breath-taking. A large mural with a painting of the night sky with paper lanterns dancing with the wind was so vividly beautiful and detailed one would think that they were watching a lantern festival outside the window. Their fellow students clapped and cheered as Rapunzel blushed prettily and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. Elsa swallowed a lump that formed her throat and faced Jack only to find him staring at her cousin with affection in his eyes. Those blue eyes…

"Blondie's amazing huh, Sunshine?"

Elsa tore her gaze from his face and dropped on the ground, her chest suddenly felt tight and the urge to flee from the scene was overwhelming. Luckily when she lifted her eyes, she saw Merida and Anna talking by the bear statue and sprinted towards them, not hearing how Jack called out after her. Anna's blue eyes widened as her sister almost tackled to the ground. She knew she was shaking and when her sister asked her why, all she could say was,

"I need to get out of here."

-;-

"You cannae be serious."

Merida had snorted when she told them her predicament. The Scottish lass was never a fan of Jack and declared him a nemesis when his great stink bomb prank had backfired. His target was Hiccup but the balloons had fallen on the redhead when she opened the library door, which Jack had wrongfully predicted that it would be his best friend.

The DunBroch had cursed up a storm as she stomped into Jack and Elsa's class and pulled him out by the scruff of his hoodie with every intention to beat him up or make him her archery team's moving target. All of which was avoided after Elsa calmed the fuming girl down and made Jack apologize to her. But it wasn't enough for Merida, even if he`s forced to wear a kilt for a whole year. Anna chose to ignore Merida's offhanded comment and rubbed her sister's back,

"It's alright Elsa, I mean… uh…" she had no words of comfort for her. Elsa knew that Anna would like to grab Jack by the arms and shake him but that will just worsen things. Anna can't even say a mean word about Rapunzel because it wasn't in her nature; plus it wasn't their cousin's fault that Jack likes her.

Elsa exhaled through her mouth and wiped her forehead which was drenched with cold sweat. She sighed before she composed herself, "No, Merida's right. It was stupid of me to act like that-"

"It's because you have feelings for him" Anna interjected, "It's normal to feel like that Elsa."

However, Merida sat next to her with her arms and legs crossed, "This talk about 'feelings' and stuff just grate my nerves. It's just a crush and nothin' more, give it a week and it'll go away". Elsa tapped her fingertips on her lips before she nodded, "No, I'm okay. I just needed to clear my head, that's all."

Weeks then, two months flew by and they found themselves busy with the annual school fair. They all had to participate, except for Elsa who had to check each and every stall, booth and facility to ensure safety and cleanliness.

It was the day of the school fair.

There were booths and rides and even a boat ride that can be rented. Food carts lined with the beautifully manicured grass lawns and the speakers blasted cheerful music. Hundreds of visitors flocked the school for a day of merriment and for all the students; no school after the fair to get some rest and recover from their hard day's work.

Elsa did her routinely rounds, checking every booth and asked the visitors what they think of the fair and thankfully it was a success so far. One of the most visited booths was Merida and Astrid Hoffstedder's duck shooting range where it was so challenging that visitors had started to get too serious with it. When

Elsa saw a teenager with spiky hair complain to Merida that it was too hard; the redhead rolled her eyes and said "If it's too easy then I would'a just given you the prize now wouldn't I? Now shut yer gob and shoot!"

Anna was in food duty, much to her displeasure as she straightened the red cap on her head. The younger girl's face instantly brightened when she spotted her sister among the crowd. Elsa looked up from her clipboard and shook her head when Anna left the pretzel kiosk unattended and ran to her direction with a Cheshire cat grin.

Anna waved two blue tickets at her face and thrust them into her hand, "Consider this my birthday-slash-Christmas present to you!" she squealed. Elsa sighed and looked at the tickets, "Why do I need two tickets for the boat ride?"

Her sister shot her an 'are-you-kidding-me?!' glance and grabbed her clipboard, "Now's the perfect time Elsie! Jack and Hiccup's break will start within five minutes so I got the last tickets from Jimmy so 'Carpet Dim sum'!"

"You mean carpe diem" Elsa corrected as Anna pushed her towards the gaming booth. "Yes, do the Latin thing and grab the opportunity!" before she ran back to the stand where irate customers waited.

Jack and Hiccup's assigned booth was the dunker. Of course, Jack was elated while Hiccup wasn't too thrilled; maybe because he knew that he will be the one to ride the chair that was connected to the bull's eye.

The poor brunette was sitting on the chair above four feet deep water. No doubt it will be ice cold, but it seemed that no one had succeeded yet because the skinny teenager who was in his swimming trunks and a sleeveless shirt that bore their school's logo was still mercifully dry.

"C'mon you guys can do better than that!" Jack taunted the gathered crowd. Elsa chuckled as she walked near the tank where their box was brimming with bills.

Hiccup swallowed audibly as a tall and burly smug looking guy with his black hair tied in a small ponytail stepped up and grabbed the three balls from the jar.

"This is nothing, no one can throw the ball like Gaston!" he boasted. A smaller pudgy guy nodded and backed up his words.

"Yeah yeah, just throw the ball" Jack drawled.

Elsa waved at him from the crowd which he saw in an instant. He jumped down from the platform and approached her, "Hiya Sunshine."

"Hullo, is... everything okay back here?" she asked. She looked over Jack's shoulder and saw Hiccup wipe his forehead with relief when all of the guy's aims fired.

"Yep, so far so good" he replied before he checked his watch and licked his chapped lips, "I could really use a break right now though"

"But who will stay here with Hiccup?" she asked.

Suddenly, Merida's voice entered their conversation. "I'll keep an eye out" she offered.

"Why?" he asked in suspicion.

"Hey I'm doin' ya a favour here snowball. Either you owe me or you can kiss your lunch break goodbye" she bargained, though it was more of a demand.

"But Merida" Elsa cut in, "What about your booth? Won't Astrid be angry that you left her to manage it by herself?"

A frown made itself known on the DunBroch's face and Elsa knew that it meant bad news. "It was Astrid who kicked me out! Tch, just because I said that I'm a better shot than her... honestly; she's just sore coz I got into the Archery Club and she didn't."

Elsa cringed as she imagined that confrontation. Both Astrid and Merida were well-known for their competitiveness and to keep them together; it was like a ticking time bomb. Finally, Jack handed the key to the money box to Merida and cheerfully waved to Hiccup who was gripping the back of the chair. Merida laughed at her friend's predicament before she leaned against the glass and yelled out, "Alright ya wee lads; which one o' you think you can dunk this twig into the water?"

"Merida! Don't encourage them!"

Jack and Elsa laughed when they heard Hiccup's protest. They took a detour to the corndogs where Jack devoured five sticks of them while Elsa worked in her nerves. Just a few more steps and they were on the entrance to the boat ride. Elsa's hand fidgeted to take the tickets and tried to build up the courage to ask Jack to ride the boat with her... and maybe even confess her feelings for him. But when she turned to talk to him, he grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her to Jimmy who was helping a mother and her son into a white boat.

Her heart soared as they made their way to the boats; could it be? Was Jack planning the same thing as well? 'Hold on Elsa,' her mind said, 'Maybe he's just gonna take the boat for a spin with you. Don't get your hopes up.'

But the thought Jack asking her above all people in an intimate ride still made her heart thump loudly. Jimmy Hawkins wiped his tanned hands on his pants before he cheekily grinned at Jack,

"Well, I knew you'd show up sooner or later" he joked before he nodded at Elsa. Jack's cheeks bloomed into a fairly pink tinge before he lightly punched Jim on his arm and said, "I need two tickets."

Jim's face fell as he crossed his arms, "Wait... you didn't have any tickets?"

"Well... no but I thought you still had some and-"

"Sorry buddy but I sold the last ones to Alice and Vanellope."

"But I told you I'm gonna grab a boat with someone!"

"You didn't tell me to keep some for you!"

Jack groaned in frustration and walked away. Elsa apologized for his behaviour before she chased after him to tell her friend that she already got them covered.

But as she cut his path in front of him, Jack suddenly told her, "Man, I was going to surprise Blondie with a boat ride but the tickets were sold out!"

Elsa could hear her heart being struck down into a million pieces. "Ra-Rapunzel?" she stuttered in a faint voice, afraid that her tone sounded more pathetic than what she was feeling.

Jack's eyes had never left the ground and nodded, "Yeah. I'm gonna ask her out and she said that she wants to try it so I figured that it was my best bet." He sighed deeply and kicked a stone out of the curb. He then pocketed his hands into his hoodie, "Damn it, just one shot. I just need one shot, was that too much to ask?"

Elsa's heart squeezed painfully as she watched the helpless expression on his normally smiling face. She bit her bottom lip and chose a decision that will break her heart. But on the other hand... it will make him happy and for Elsa; as long as Jack's happy, she'll be happy too. Even if it meant leaving his side. So with a heavy heart, Elsa took out the tickets and silently placed it into his hand. Jack shot her a surprised look but she just shook her head and kept her eyes to her hands that was still wrapped around his own,

"Go find Rapunzel and take that ride" she whispered before she pulled him into a sudden hug.

"Elsa?"

She pretended not to hear his curious voice or the fact that she was hugging him in the middle of a crowded place. Just this one time, she wanted to be selfish. "Good luck" she whispered close to his ear before she pulled back and forced a smile on her freckled face.

His face was mixed with emotions but she had to turn away when the tears threatened to fall. Elsa faked a laugh as she started to walk away and called out "Make her happy alright?"

"Uh... okay" he answered with a tone of confusion and uncertainty.

Elsa continued to walk along the booths with a fake grin plastered to her face. This was no time for tears; she had to feel happy for them. Jack will ask Rapunzel out, Rapunzel will see how amazing he really is and they will start a relationship and if they're lucky, they will still be together after high school, then college, and then move into the adult world together.

It was that simple.

After all, Jack and Rapunzel would be better suited than she and Jack will ever be.

She didn't know why but she ended up walking back to the dunking booth where Anna was now talking to Merida as Hiccup walked back into the tank after he dried himself with a towel.

Anna waved happily to her direction but her smile was instantly dropped when she saw her sister's devastated expression. It was the fastest she had ever seen Anna run. Her twin braids flew as she grabbed her older sister and barged into an empty tent. Anna poked her head out to see if anyone saw them before she closed the flaps.

"Elsie, what happened?! Did Jack say something mean because if he did, I'll... I'll-"

Elsa shook her head violently before she sat on a chair and wept. Unaware of her sister's arms around her and Merida kneeling in front of her with a concerned face. For a few minutes more, Elsa finally wiped the tears from her eyes and composed herself once again. The two girls beside her were amazed at how fast she can get back on her feet.

The day flew by and Elsa had to check all the booths and help the others clean up the mess. Anna, Merida and Hiccup volunteered to stay and help her but she insisted that she can take care of it all by herself. Come to think of it, she hadn't seen Jack or Rapunzel the whole day.

'Maybe they took their date somewhere more private' she seethed in her mind before she sighed and continued her duty with her returned clipboard on hand.

Three 'no school' days and the weekend flew by and everyone had returned to its usual routine like clockwork. Except now, Jack was hesitant to talk to her. Every time they would see each other by chance at the lockers, he would immediately turn to the other direction or pull someone into a random conversation.

Was it something she had done?

That would be stupid, she actually gave him a way to ask her cousin out and now he's avoiding her?

Elsa was so deep into her thoughts that she accidentally bumped into someone and her books flew from her hands down to the floor.

"I'm so sorry"

"My apologies"

Elsa looked up and saw a handsome young man with thick auburn hair. He was wearing a spice brown vest and a rich purple undershirt with the brass buttons that shone under the lights. He exuded the 'prince-aura' (as Anna would like to call it) and he easily flashed an apologetic grin. The blond girl composed herself and said; "No I should've been watching where I was walking- I haven't seen you here before"

The young man stood up and picked up her books, much to her embarrassment. "I just transferred here from another town" he explained. "My name is Hans. Hans Suthernisles"

"Elsa Freyis" she introduced herself, "Strange, it's already the middle of the school year. I didn't think we can still accept transferees and new students at this time."

"Oh, my old school's principal recommended me," he said and flashed a brilliant smile.

Elsa wasn't entirely convinced with this young man. He was obviously someone who can charm his way out of everything but she supposed he was harmless. After all, his... type was almost forgotten in the modern times. The conservative, gentleman with disciplined charm; the kind of man that her parents would like her to marry someday.

"Actually" he spoke up, "I'm a bit lost. See it's my first day here but I can't seem to find half of my classes."

"Can I see your schedule?" she asked. He handed her a white piece of paper and Elsa read his timetable and it turned out that he was in the same class as she was.

"Well, I can honestly say that you won't have any more troubles finding your way around the school" she sighed "I'm your classmate in every class."

"Then I guess I'm one lucky guy," Hans said with a dashing smile.

Elsa wasn't a girl who can easily be swayed by a single grin except for Jack. But since Jack had decided to ignore her for no reason whatsoever, she led Hans to their Geometry class, unaware that the white-haired boy was eyeing at their way with a glare.

The news of a handsome newcomer had spread through the school like wildfire.

Elsa chose to focus on her studies rather than her new companion and the swooning ladies, including Anna, who followed him. Thankfully lunch time had arrived and Elsa sat on their usual table and waited for her friends. She watched Hans with his tray of food on hand and scanned the crowd.

There was a nagging feeling that he was looking for her and she won't indulge him.

Anna had arrived with Rapunzel in tow. Elsa's eyes widened as she took in her cousin's appearance. Gone was the golden blond hair that fell to the back of her knees and instead, a chestnut brown colour with a stylish shoulder-length cut replaced it. Rapunzel was all smiles and bounce as she sat on the seat across the blond and whispered, "You'll never guess what happened!"

Elsa tried to keep her face blank and waited for the worst but she found Anna grinning from ear to ear as well. "What is it?" she hesitantly asked.

"I met someone during the boat ride!" Rapunzel squealed. Elsa's heart stopped. Instead of excitement, she felt hurt for Jack. Maybe that's why he was anxious to talk to her. The one bad thing to have a single group of friends was that you can't avoid each other for long.

If Rapunzel had rejected Jack, it would natural for him to think that she had told Elsa the news and he was trying to save face. But how did Rapunzel meet the guy if she and Jack were in the middle of the lake?

"His said his name was Flynn Ryder. Okay; he's a bit cocky and thought his subpar flirting techniques would get me but, I really think he's an okay guy" Rapunzel exclaimed, her cheeks were peppered with a red hue that extended down to her neck.

Elsa shot a questioning gaze at Anna who, in turn, lifted her shoulder's up with an 'I don't know' gesture. The Freyis siblings had never seen their cousin act so smitten before. She started to tell them about an older man with a goatee and his apparently big ego. Merida and Hiccup arrived in the middle of her tale and when Rapunzel recounted what he looked like; the redhead gaped and slammed her palms against the table, effectively making almost everyone at the cafeteria jump.

"That's the one who conned us!" she yelled indignantly. Hiccup shush-ed her but Merida growled like an angry kitten and crossed her arms, "He can't be that good. You said you've calculated the weight of the ball and switched it to a lighter one!" she complained to Hiccup.

"Wait, so you rigged the game?" Rapunzel gasped. Hiccup nodded before he gulped at Elsa's disapproving frown.

"It was Jack's idea" he muttered.

Elsa massaged her temple and breathed out "Of course it was his idea. I take it that this Flynn character managed to outsmart your own con?"

"Please stop calling it a 'con', I feel like a felon" Hiccup grumbled as he took out his sandwich from the brown paper bag. They all laughed at him before the blond felt the end of her braid being tugged and when she spun around; she saw the one she was looking for.

He graced them with his carefree grin and eased into the seat next to hers. She knew she was staring at him; half a mind to lecture his ear off for ignoring her and for missing their morning classes but the other was just relieved that he didn't just suddenly drop off from the face of the planet and mope into a downward spiral of depression.

Hiccup and Anna greeted him while Merida ignored his presence altogether. Rapunzel gave a sweet grin which he nodded to. It was like they were talking to each other and Elsa can't help but feel curious what it was about.

"You missed class" she reminded him, expecting that he will have a dozen of excuses that will help him weasel his way out of his crime but he just shrugged and swiped a part of Hiccup's sandwich, much to the brunette's chagrin.

"So" he casually bit into the bread "Heard you've got something tailing you." Hiccup, who was drinking on bottled water choked on his drink and gave no-so-subtle kick to Jack who glared at him in retaliation.

Anna was quick to jump at Hans' defense while Merida just ate her apple without a care. Rapunzel sighed and placed a hand under her chin, "Why does Hans follow you around?"

Elsa cringed as a migraine began to sprawl across her temple, the immaturity of her friends can be exhausting, "He doesn't follow me, I just helped him find his classes since he's obviously new here."

"What, you're on the welcoming committee now?" Jack snorted, earning him a disapproving frown from Hiccup and Rapunzel.

"Well I am the Student Council president, Jack" she calmly reminded him. He opened his mouth to retort but Merida suddenly interjected,

"Aye, the lass is doin' her job. Ya arennae her keeper so back off. She can hang around with whoever she wants to."

"Hey I'm just looking out for her" he growled. It was a strange sound; Elsa had never seen him this defensive before.

"Will you stop hoverin' over her? What are ya, her boyfriend or somethin'?" Merida challenged and in a weird moment, Jack had replied

"I could be but-" before he stopped.

The air around them just got tense. Five pairs of eyes now bore at Jack and there was a fluttering thrill that bloomed in Elsa's stomach that left her in a daze. Jack avoided their gaze and bit rather savagely at the sandwich before they all dropped their stares, one by one.

Except for Elsa.

Was it a chance for her to tell him? To say that she really liked him for more than a year now?

But fear crept into her, endless possibilities of why he said that had forced her to step away from telling him her feelings. Maybe he was just joking to get Merida off his back. But she wanted nothing more than to hear what he was trying to say.

"Ms. Elsa!" a voice came from behind her.

The sound of heavy footfalls and the formality usage to her name made it clear it wasn't Jack. She shifted her head to see Hans walking towards her with his books tucked under his arm.

"You can just call me Elsa. No need for formalities"

They began to walk side by side to their Literature class, and again; she could feel the eyes right on them. But she wasn't comfortable in his presence like how she was with Jack, she can't even figure out why she was always comparing them to each other.

"I haven't got the chance to thank you for your kindness," Hans said as they walked down the hall.

"It's nothing" she replied, "I can't really leave you alone especially since youère new and all.."

The tall man gave her a crooked smile and commented, "You're such a kind person. I can't believe such a magnificent girl exist."

'And you're being a bit too grateful' she thought.

A hand shot between them and encircled around her shoulders. She blinked owlishly before she saw the blue sweater sleeves and a voice that said, "Hey Sunshine."

Hans took a step back to stare at Jack with a blank face before he graced him with a polite nod, "I'm afraid we haven't been properly introduced. My name is-"

"Hans Suthernisles from Misthaven Academy, yeah I heard about you" Jack answered coolly as he pulled her closer to him.

The heat on her cheeks threatened to push steam from her ears and her heart pounded at the sudden closeness of his body to hers. But when she tried to pull away, he kept his grip on her shoulders, gentle but firm at the same time.

"And by your appearance and ill manners, I'd say you're Jack Frost" Hans rebutted with a fake grin, his green eyes were like glass. "I didn't know that Ms. Elsa had such an... interesting friend."

"Yeah, and you better keep your long nose out of her business."

"Jack!"

"Don't think that I can be intimidated by your idle threats. You're merely a delinquent who just seeks attention with childish pranks and had no goals in life by the looks of it."

"Stop it both of you!" she snapped as she finally broke free from Jack's arm (which started to grip her shoulder in a vice-like force) and stood between them, her eyes flashed dangerously, "Now I want you to act like your age and stop acting like a couple of baboons! We have a class to attend so enough is enough."

Jack glowered at them before he marched to the halls with a huff, "Fine"

Hans smirked at his retreating figure before Elsa sent him an icy glare, "You don't have the right to talk to him that way!"

"I deeply apologize for my behaviour but he also didn't have the right to talk to me like that as well" he defended himself.

Elsa held up a hand and sighed, "I know he came off... blunt-"

He scoffed at the word but she pressed on, "but that doesn't mean that you can just say what you want, especially since you're new here!"

He sighed deeply and nodded, "Indeed, I behaved like an uncouth person. I hope that you will forgive me." Elsa didn't want to but it would be immature if she denied him forgiveness. And, after all, Jack started it.

"But if I may be so bold," he said as they continued their way to the classroom, "May I ask if you're in a relationship with him?"

She almost missed her footing before she caught herself, before she cleared her throat and tucked a strand of hair to the back of her ear. "We- we're not involved in an -ahem- relationship. We're just friends."

"Oh"

Elsa hoped that the conversation would end there but then he stopped walking, which made her stop as well. "Then is it alright if I ask you out for dinner?"

She stared, "I just met you"

"Then we'll get to know each other better over a great meal. What do you say?"

"What do you mean you said yes?!"

Rapunzel's shout echoed throughout the house, the birds that were perched on the tree flew from fright as the layer-haired girl paced in Elsa's spacious room.

Elsa didn't know why she was making a big deal about this, as well as Merida but Anna was siding with Rapunzel.

"He asked me out to dinner, not marry him" Elsa groaned as she flipped through the pages of her book. Rapunzel made a face before she plopped on the foot of the bed. Anna grumbled as she lay down next to Rapunzel and pouted at her sister.

"What about Ja-rassic Park?" Anna 'smoothly' recovered when Merida's foot connected to her shoulder and gestured to a confused Rapunzel.

"Jurassic Park?" both Rapunzel and Elsa asked at the same time.

"I absolutely have no idea what I'm talking about" Anna whined before she pulled a pillow to her face. Merida and Elsa shared a look as Rapunzel sat up, the ends of her hair curled up.

"Soooo..." Rapunzel started, "You uh, like this Hans person?" For a minute there, Elsa thought her cousin sounded nervous.

"He's a proper gentleman" she coughed out, knowing that Merida and Rapunzel were waiting for a follow-up sentence but sadly there were none.

"You never liked, you know... someone else?" she asked in a sing-song voice.

Anna pushed the pillow from her face and her eyes widened and rolled to her side; mouthing the words 'Could we?' Merida rolled her eyes and leaned against the headboard while Elsa weighed the consequences in her mind. The fact that they didn't tell Rapunzel will inevitably hurt her but now since she has found herself a guy who Elsa wasn't so besotted with, it gave the decision to let Rapunzel in with their secret.

Anna practically bounced on the bed and clapped before she scooted in front of Rapunzel and whispered into her ear. Her green eyes widened and her mouth opened into a silent scream; then there came the-

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No way!"

"Yes way!"

"Shut. Up!"

"It's true!"

"I need new friends" Merida whispered beside the sighing blond.

Rapunzel's excited face puzzled Elsa, it was strange for the artistic girl to be too elated for simple news like a crush but as her cousin tackled her down, Elsa thought that maybe Rapunzel was just genuinely happy... for what, she didn't know.

"Oh wait until he hears about this, it will be so-"

Elsa's eyes snapped open before she pushed her away and shouted "Rapunzel!" The brunette blinked before she tilted her head, "What?"

"No one can know about this, especially Jack!" she exclaimed.

"But... why?"

"Promise me; promise that you won't say a word!" Elsa made her swore as she clasped her hands to Rapunzel's. The other young woman looked conflicted for a while before she bit her bottom lip and breathed out a laboured, "Okay"

Elsa sighed and hugged her closely, "Thank you"

"But" Rapunzel hastily added, "If you like Jack, why are you going out with Hans? Sure he's cute-"

"Are you kidding? He's has a face of an angel!" Anna yelled before Merida slapped a hand over her mouth and shuts her up with a glare.

"-and nice, but... oh... why not Jack?!"

"Because" Elsa replied, her tone louder than usual as if she was trying to convince herself rather than her friends, "Even if I liked him, it will never work out! He's my best friend and if he didn't feel the same way then our friendship's over. And even if we did start something, what will happen if it didn't work out? I don't want to lose him Rapunzel! I don't want to get through life without him by my side, telling me that everything's going to be alright even if things go wrong!"

It was exhausting. Merida and Rapunzel stared at her with wide eyes while Anna scooped her in her arms and cradled her in a protected embrace as Elsa took a shaky breath to calm herself down. If she can't have Jack as a lover, then she can still be happy with having him by her side as his friend.

And that thought broke her heart even more.

The restaurant was an expensive place, especially for a high school student and she triple-checked the text message Hans had sent her before she held her coat tighter around her body. Her platinum blond hair was tied up in an intricate braided bun and a pair of dangling earrings caught the lights of the crystal chandeliers that graced the high ceiling. The floors were covered by lush burgundy carpets and tablecloths that were like satin trimmed with gold threads by the edges.

"Yes, mademoiselle?"

She turned around to see a tall man with a receding hairline stand behind the podium; his suit was immaculate and there was a pure white rose pinned on his lapel. Elsa bit her lower lip as she approached the man and said, "Um, there was a reservation under Hans Suthernisles?"

The man nodded as he opened a thick book and browsed the entries under the practiced gaze. Finally, he confirmed their seats and offered to take her coat. The silver formal dress had clung to her like a second skin, making her even more conscious as they walked past other patrons. These were the first-class members of the community; some were successful businessmen and women, some were celebrities and others might have belonged to the hot professions that cashed in top dollar.

They finally reached the table, a small intimate setting with a long-stemmed rose on a crystal vase in the middle and behind it was a large window that was decorated by a rich mauve curtain. It was simply too... extravagant.

While her family was certainly well-off and they were part of the high-class social circle; she and her sister preferred a simpler setting like a burger joint or the occasional mall. For one thing, the atmosphere felt too stuffy for her; as if the walls were closing in and it will suffocate everyone in it. She asked for glass water and it came in a wine glass with a wedge of lemon floating on top of it.

They were supposed to meet here by seven, but it was already eight-thirty. She leaned to her side and scanned the crowd in hopes of catching the sight of her date but with no such luck; she regained her composure, posture as stiff as a board.

Minutes ticked by and she could feel the eyes on her table; knowing getting funny looks from the servers and the neighbouring tables. It was like being in school again; all eyes on her. Judging, waiting for her to commit a mistake. The pain of embarrassment and humiliation crippled her and she fought everything she could from folding her arms to the table and just cry.

She fisted her dress on her lap and stared down at the cloth with a blank expression. Her eyes stung with unshed tears and her face was cold and it was not because of the air conditioning. The choice of walking out with her head held high was certainly tempting but when she raised her head and saw the numerous amounts of people between her and the door, it overturned her decision.

'My first date... and I was stood up'

Was this a cruel joke?

Did Hans got mad because she told him to get off of Jack's back?

No one can be that cold-hearted, right?

A hopeful voice in her mind told her that maybe he was just caught up with something. With a rush of optimism had her open the ivory clutch purse and check her phone for any messages or even a missed call. Elsa was greeted with a blank screen. The urge to cry was too great and a few drops had already fallen to her lap before she covered the lower part of her face with her hand, lips trembling and sobs were forced down as Elsa tried not to make a scene.

But how could she not?

She was in an exclusive restaurant in the presence of the glitterati, some of them may also be her parents' friends and she came there in hopes of starting some sort of bond with anyone other than her friends but now, it seemed that she can't even have a proper date.

Elsa was on the brink of tears when she heard a voice call her name. At first, she thought she had gone crazy because there was no way in a million years would the Jack Frost ever set foot in a classy place like this one.

But when Elsa lifted her head; there he was. There were no suits or a bouquet of roses in his hands, no music that came from the violins came from behind him. It was just him, in his favourite blue hoodie and brown pants, a pair of brown sandals and his silver hair sticking out in every way it wanted.

"Jack?" Her voice sounded like she was dreaming, maybe even delirious with insanity. But Jack placed a hand on her cheek and wiped the trails of her tears with his thumb.

"C'mon Sunshine, let's get outta here."

"How did you know where I was?" she whispered as she pulled her coat closer. The night air was cool and comforting but she was a bit overdressed to casually walk through the streets. Her elaborate hairdo was out of place already and she has hidden her earrings in her purse.

He was walking right beside her, like how he always did, and kept his eyes in front of them, "You can't keep a secret from me Elsa."

A grim smile appeared on her lips and shook her head, "I'm afraid you're right about that one."

The path they were taking was a familiar route that led towards her house. Jack and Hiccup had been there before when they were working on a group project that concerned a large volcano made of paper mache and lava that was curiously created with chili sauce.

"I don't want to go home just yet," she said to him.

Jack spared her a glance before he silently took her hand and led her to the playground. It was empty except for the moths that danced around the streetlights; their shadows mimicked their movements that flickered the light.

Elsa sat on the bench while Jack stood on a swing's seat, coiling the chains around his forearm as his eyes remained unfocused, he was deep in thought.

"I can't believe this happened" she breathed out, her voice was shaking and her hair was surely a mess by now when she felt several wisps of her hair cover the sides of her face.

"The first date I have with someone, turned out to be one big joke. I feel so stupid."

"Don't be" he quietly spoke up.

"Then maybe he just realized that it was a mistake to ask me out. The resident ice queen who is cold and emotionless" she let out a hollow humor-less laugh. She watched his eyebrows furrow in an angry expression.

"That's not why-"

"And how would you know?" she asked, feeling her temper rise "Do you know his secrets too?"

"Yes I did, that's why I told him to stop talking to you! If he has some sense in that thick head of his, he'll listen!" he easily replied through gritted teeth.

A staggering blow had left her still; a chill ran through her spine, it was like she was doused with ice water.

"It was you?" she whispered, "You were the reason Hans didn't come?" Elsa suddenly stood up, her clutch fell from her lap but she didn't care.

"How could you- how dare you?!" she screeched, her throat ached as her tone pitched into a sharper level. "You have no right to do that!"

Tears sprung out of her eyes but she didn't care as she advanced towards him, a rush of satisfaction in her chest when she saw a spark of fear in his eyes as he hopped down from the swing.

"I'm just trying to protect you!" he roared.

"You're not my keeper Jack! He was only- I mean, protect me from what? Hans? He's just asking me out! He didn't have any ulterior motives-"

"He does" he grounded out but at least he wasn't yelling anymore.

That stopped her screaming.

"Wha-what do you mean?" she sputtered. Surely by now, her fair-toned face was now pasty white when Jack confirmed it.

"Not any of those private things" he coughed out, his cheeks and ears turned red, "More like he was trying to take advantage of you and your connections."

"My connections?"

He nodded as he walked to her and lifted his hands to the sides of her head. Thumbs drying the streaks of tears before he led her back to the bench. It was then he explained everything.

It turned out that Jack and Hiccup overheard Hans talking to someone on the phone earlier that day and he was talking about getting close to Elsa and Anna's dad so that Hans' father can find an opening for a hostile takeover on the company her father owned. Jack tried to look for her everywhere and found out where they were supposed to meet when he confronted Hans. How he got Hans to talk was a mystery but she was really glad that he was looking out for her.

He then pulled away and leaned forward, his forearms rested on his knees. "Why were you so itching to go out with that Hans character anyway? You just met him!"

"I don't know; maybe because of the fact that someone actually wanted to go out with me just..."

Elsa folded her hands in her lap and bowed her head.

"Y'know, it's not because you're cold that no one wants to go out with you" he whispered, she almost failed to hear his words as the breeze picked up.

"Then why? I'm not partial to high school romance because they almost never last but I think it's better than-"

"Than what?" he prodded. She faced him and in an instant, her heart skipped a beat. His unruly hair followed the wind and his eyes seemed to glow as he looked as her as well.

"Than..."

Elsa forgot what she was going to say. There they were, in a quiet place where she can finally tell him what she wanted to say when she got tongue-tied and fear had its icy grip on her guts.

Thankfully Jack just let it slide and focused more on his own words, "I think... there's someone who does want to go out with you."

Curiosity claimed her attention as she leaned to him and asked, "Really? Then why hasn't he asked me yet?"

"Because... maybe he was afraid" he answered.

Elsa raised a brow and crossed her arms on her chest, "Afraid of what?"

Jack shifted in his seat and looked up at the star-ridden sky that twinkled faintly, "He's afraid that you're way out of his league and if you ever had a relationship, he might not be someone her parents would like for you."

Now she was confused. Did this mystery guy tell Jack everything? Elsa sighed and leaned back to the bench, "How will he know that if he doesn't try? Sometimes you just have to take a chance."

"Fair enough" he replied, she could hear him smile at that.

'This is it,' she thought, 'Now's your chance!' "Jack?"

"Hm?"

Elsa fidgeted her hands and stared at her lap, and took a deep breath, "Jack, I..."

"'I'?"

"I... am tired; I think I should go home now." 'You're a coward Elsa'

However, Jack adjusted his position so that he was now facing her; determination shone in his eyes.

"Sunshine?"

"Yes?" she could see his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed.

"I... I like you!"

"Oh" was all she said before realization hit her, "Oh!" Warmth covered her whole face and extended down to her neck, she had achieved a face that resembled a cherry tomato.

"I- I um-"

'Answer him!' the voice in her mind chastised but she was so flustered, caught off-guard.

"I like you too Jack! I mean, I really, really like you!"

There, she said it. Now what?

Wait...

Now what?

The worst possible scenarios had opened up in her mind's eye. What if they started dating and when things went downhill? What if this was a mistake? What if her parents, especially her father, won't approve of it?

"Great! So... um... wanna grab a bite to eat or something?" he stuttered, clearly unaware of the turmoil in her head. It was time to make a decision again but this time; it was a make or break choice that will determine the outcome of where they would stand.

And she can't believe she was saying this but-

"I'm sorry... I can't" she whispered out. As soon as the words left her mouth, she wanted to disappear from the face of the earth.

"Wait- why not?" he choked out.

"Because... you're my best friend," she said, "You're the most amazing person I've ever met and I want to be with you more than anything but we can't!"

"And why not?!" he demanded.

"Because it won't work! When we come to the conclusion that we don't fit each other as a couple, then what we have now will be gone! And I know we will have to move on at one point or another but I can't bear to see you with someone else, knowing that we had something between us that I may never let go of!"

Tremors shook her whole body as she voiced out all her fears; the things that sometimes kept her out that night apart from his growing affection for Rapunzel.

Jack suddenly let out a humorless laugh; it sounded so wrong. "I can't believe this, you're actually dumping me when we didn't get to start yet?"

"I'm saying the truth Jack" she bit back, "I don't want to put us in a situation that will destroy our friendship."

"What the hell happened to 'sometimes you just have to take a chance'? Elsa, I'm not saying that we're gonna have a perfect relationship and we will have problems here and there but don't talk about it ending like you already know!"

Elsa clenched her eyes shut and placed a hand to her temple, "I just... it's not. Relationships shouldn't be taken so lightly! Just because you have an infatuation for someone doesn't necessarily mean that you'll end up together!"

"Infatuation? You think all I had for you was a crush?" he bellowed, "You don't get tell how I feel about you Elsa, you don't know anything!"

Anger rose from the pit of her chest and the need to get away from this mess they made. She stood up and grabbed her clutch from the ground.

"Where are you going?"

"Away from you" she growled before she whipped around and said, "Frankly I think you just like me now because Rapunzel found someone and I'm just a rebound!"

"Elsa!"

"No, if that's the case then I'm glad that this never happened between us! I will not be someone's second choice!" she yelled. Who cares if someone heard or saw her in the playground shouting at Jack Frost?

Jack leaped to his feet, hands clenched and his blue eyes darkened with anger, "I'm not that kind of person, you know that"

"Oh I'm sorry, I thought I didn't know anything!" she snidely remarked and began to walk away. She wanted to get out of here, anger had turned her into someone she's not, a sarcastic, cold-hearted woman who just turned down and insulted someone precious in her life. Tears threatened to spill again but she steeled herself as she walked out of the playground and into the streets.

There were no cabs in sight and she found herself stranded in a deserted street. She would have called her chauffer but it was already late and she didn't want to bother him. It would be a long way to her house and she might as well start if she ever wanted to be home for breakfast. So, she started walking.

It didn't take more than five minutes before she heard footsteps behind her. Elsa gripped the clutch with her hands and turned around to smack the stranger on the head only to find Jack.

He was staring at her with a blank face and she can't help but ask, "What are you doing?"

His face scrunched up like he was in pain before he scratched his head with an irate hand, "Look, I'm not going to let you go home alone even if we... said some things."

She wanted to stay mad at him, she really does. But one look at him and her whole resolve crumbled. He was her weakness, and how that came to be, she would probably never know. After a few more seconds, she finally relented.

The atmosphere between them was heavy. There were no playful banters or casual talks. Just silence; each trapped in their own thoughts as they walked through the streets side by side.

They had just passed the coffee shop they frequented in when Jack spoke out in a soft voice, "You weren't my second choice you know." She didn't speak, afraid that the words that will escape would be vile and cutting so he continued, "Sure I like Rapunzel because she was pretty, good with guitar and paintings plus she's fun and sweet"

'Yeah, keep talking' she thought in a scathing tone.

"But you know why I realized that she's not the one I was looking for?"

"Because of her sudden transformation from being a blond to a brunette?" That was a low blow but he shook his head and answered, "Nah, she did that because I told her Eugene liked girls with their natural hair colour."

"Who's Eugene?"

"Oh, you guys know him as Flynn Ryder but back to the subject"

Elsa felt the corners of her mouth tugged upwards when she heard his lighthearted tone. They were already falling back to their routine even after a rather dramatic episode back at the playground.

"Right, why you decided you didn't want her anymore" she nodded, a slight teasing in her voice easily made him grin.

"It's because she wasn't you" he easily answered.

How can he say such things without getting so flustered? But that was the pros of being Jack Frost. He was confident in his abilities and he wasn't afraid of anything.

"What do you mean?"

"For a while, I thought that Rapunzel was the one but then, I started to think about you a lot and it took a lot of 'therapy sessions' with Hiccup and a push from Blon- I mean, Rapunzel to realize that you were the one I liked from the start."

"Jack," Elsa shook her head as they approach the large black wrought gates that indicated the entrance to the Freyis mansion. "Rapunzel and I are as different as the sun and moon."

"I know, and that's the best part. See, I first saw you as a sister but I sometimes catch myself thinking about you more and more these past few months. I thought that it was because I was always with you but I was beginning to ask myself why I AM always with you. I'm not trying to be cheesy or mushy or any of that disgusting stuff but I want you to be by my side more than just a friend, or a best friend. You can be bossy and frigid and can't tell a joke to save your skin but you're smart, playful when you want to be and believe when I say this, you are the most beautiful girl I've ever met. You're responsible and mature, okay so you're a mother hen but you would put your own life on the line to protect Anna and everyone else you cared about. I like you Sunshine, more than you know. And believe me, you really know a lot."

"I know" she smiled, as she watched him say her low and high points, her heart never stopped beating in a furious pace. She wanted nothing more than to kiss him, catch him in his vulnerability but ultimately decided against it. They stood in front of the gate; all Elsa had to do was to push the intercom and ask someone to open the gates for her.

They stood in awkward silence before Jack rubbed the back of his neck and said, "Well, uh, see you tomorrow I guess."

"Yes, don't forget that we have homework" she reminded him.

He rolled his eyes, "I was planning to forget about it." Elsa laughed a little but stopped when he advanced to her with his hands up. They were at head's breath and the tips of their noses were already touching when she felt him tug her bun and freed her side braid.

"You looked better with that hairstyle" he commented, which they both blushed.

"So, good night." She looked up to him fully with a sweet smile.

He faced her as well with his own grin, "'Night."

Seconds ticked by and when Elsa lifted her hand to press the intercom box, Jack lunged at her and trapped her in his arms, his lips covered hers.

And there they were, kissing in front if the gate with no care in the world. Her hands dug into his scalp as he pulled her closer. It may look... wild but it was as innocent as they both were. After a few more push of their lips, Jack pulled away and leaned his forehead against hers.

"Sorry," he breathed out

"Don't be" she answered in the same breathy voice.

"Oh don't worry, he will be" a third voice came and it caused them to jump a couple of feet away from each other. Elsa's father was standing behind the gates in his silk robes and a stern expression on his usually friendly face.

"Papa!" Elsa gasped as he opened the gates and pulled Elsa into their property with a death glare to the boy who 'tainted his innocent daughter' "Hello Jack, goodbye Jack" he tersely greeted before he closed the gates and guided Elsa inside.

The eldest Freyis daughter had to keep herself from laughing when a maid told them there was a strange silver-haired boy standing in front of the gate, apparently whispering to himself and grabbing his hair.

The news of their relationship had spread around by appalled students and school staff alike.

As soon as they stepped into the building together, Rapunzel appeared right out of the blue and hugged them both with an excited squeak. Naturally, Anna had known the news first and she might even be the one who spread it on campus. Hiccup and Merida were walking in the halls when the freckled boy congratulated them and Merida was just staring at Elsa with her mouth opened. When Merida walked to Elsa, she thought she was going to hug her like Anna and Rapunzel did, but alas,

"Merida, where are we going?!" she asked as the redhead pulled her out of the campus by her wrist.

"Don't worry lass, I know a witch who can break the spell!"

"What spell?"

"The spell that the one that delinquent placed on you. I shall end this blasphemy before it's too late!"

Behind them, Jack was yelling at Merida to release his girlfriend and chased them while Anna and Rapunzel were clenching their sides as they laughed at the scene before them.

Hiccup just shook his head and called out, "Hey, class starts at five minutes!"

Author's Corner: Hey hey guys. My first AU/Modern Jelsa fic and I'm excited for this one.

So, what d'ya think about this fic? Extra brownie points who can point out the Dream Works/ Disney characters. Please read and review! Constructive criticism is always welcome but flames and hate notes? No thanks. I dunno if I should make a sequel or/and Jack's point of view.

#jelsa #jelsa fanfiction

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meggannn · 7 years ago

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ironically one of my favorite things about shepard/garrus is one of the things i think bioware did least successfully, at least for my personal taste. and i admit this is mostly cause i prefer developing/reading professional or emotionally reserved sheps (at least on the surface) who gradually open up to their li over time, over sheps who wear their heart on their sleeves from the beginning, and there are very few bw romances that really allow you to play that first kind of character, considering you, the pc, have to instigate the romance dialogue. there’s only so much a game can do to mimic a ‘real’ romance after all. even so i do prefer a bit of, if not subtlety, then.... tactfulness, i guess, when the pc pops the question, especially with a character like shepard who is so duty-focused and (until the proposing scene) never really indicated they were driven by their libido when looking for a partner (even if they were joking). so that “do you wanna bang” scene gives me such second hand embarrassment i gotta rewrite most of their entire me2 romance in my head and one day i’ll put it to a fic, but in the meantime...... i’ll just blab about it on tumblr dot com i guess....

like, i like the VIBE that is established. i like that in me2, we get confirmation that: a) garrus’s confidence in personal matters is absolutely nil when it comes to romance, much less an interracial romance; b) it sets up a real sweet theme of realizing they actually DONT know that much about each other’s culture or biology or anything related to their race, and the romance is staged to give them each time to do research on the other’s biology and anatomy (which is practical and common courtesy and the right thing to do! and also a little sweet when you consider how terrified garrus is of screwing it up!), c) however it started, whether facetiously or nervously or enthusiastically, these two are still able to have a nice moment together and acknowledge there are feelings between them that can (and if you ask me, do) still go unsaid. and in me3, we see them both (or at least garrus) in a bit more emotionally stable situation, maybe driven by a desire to see something go right in the middle of the war, so we establish a) garrus is still nervous and treading cautiously, but b) confident enough to prepare for a reunion, to articulate his questions about their relationship, to let shepard know he’s there for them regardless, and c) if you confirm the relationship, shepard and garrus can tease each other as friends and work together as soldiers and still have a supportive emotional/intimate partnership in their private time.

i just think you can have all of these angles to their relationship without the current get-together. imo you lose a lot of possible development and depth when you start all of this by having shepard walk in and say “heyyyyyyy let’s you and me ‘‘‘ease some tension’’’ together ;) :) ;) do you see me winking”, like.... how does a commanding officer say that to another adult they respect and (possibly) genuinely like, idk. it seemed like such a lazy way for the writers to get them into bed together without considering who these people are. and yeah, every shepard’s different, it’s possible someone found that very ic for their shepard. personally i’ve always been more of a fan of piecing together canon clues to tell me who the pc is and extrapolating an oc from there, and what most of canon tells me, is that shepard is someone who prioritizes duty (either to the alliance, or to saving innocents, or to just getting the job done) above nearly all else, including their own personal life. that doesn’t mean i don’t see shepard being an instigator or an occasional flirt. just......

bleh. is it too much to want a better get together than “let’s fuck”? idk. i feel like a whiner bc shepard/garrus is obviously the most popular pairing in the fandom, it dwarfs so many others in content and you can’t throw a stone without meeting an insufferable stan, and here i am complaining about it not being done my way. i guess i just feel like the writers listened to the fans who wanted garrus as an li from me1, but didn’t listen to why. they drew the shortest line between a and b (“they want to bone the alien? here you go, i guess!”) and left it at that.

i mean admittedly, left up to me, i’d stuff so much drawn-up pining into a canon shepard/garrus get-together that neither of them would be able to breathe through the ust. there’s a line i like in kaidan’s romance (not to hijack a shenko line for a shakarian thing, but it’s something i find so true to shepard’s character i adopt it for my shepard too, even though i don’t romance kaidan and save ashley) when shepard tells kaidan in the moment that she needs a shoulder, not a subordinate, and kaidan says “cut me a little slack, shepard, it’s not like you’re easy to read.” that is how i tend to play and read shepard: as someone who is emotionally available for their crew but plays things close to the vest with their own feelings. paired up with garrus, who is a better turian than he thinks and is pretty goal-oriented and professional under shepard’s command, it’s hard for me to believe these two would just fall into bed with each other after only one or two conversations of known build-up (stressing “known” here is as “acknowledged feelings” but could also be notable ust, which is my hc). in my reading, these two are much better at reading others (c-sec and officer training) than themselves, and one could argue are duty-driven enough to maybe not even bring up/realize their attraction until me3 (why couldn’t garrus have been an li in me3 for new romances or mshep!!!! who tf knows!!!!!)

all those times femshepard tells garrus she loves him in me3? not really my shepard’s style..... how’s an earthborn kid who’s been a marine all their adult life and never had a family or serious relationship know how to recognize and admit love out loud? garrus himself doesn’t tell shepard he loves them till the beam run, and even then, he barely whispers it. i have to turn my freaking speakers up just to hear him. it’s hard for him to say out loud. maybe turians have different language for it, or maybe there’s a stigma, or maybe the culture’s different. i dunno! but i keep thinking about the impact it would’ve had for that to be the first time shepard says it, too. like they’ve just realized it and want to get it out because they know it’s the end. or you could get away with not saying it at all, if you pick the renegade option. or you could have them try to say it and fail! come on, isn’t that sadder?

shepard wants to say -- she doesn’t know what she wants to say. whatever great emotion she’s been holding back since that night in her cabin is stuck in her throat and refuses to form. the bay door can’t remain open for long. garrus’s skull is caked with dark blue blood, his leg bent awfully, and shepard sees a sharp, snapped edge to his armor where his spur used to be. he should be in the med bay. he needs medical attention more than he needs to be wasting time saying goodbyes.

but he won’t go, he refuses, he won’t leave her be. “shepard -- i’m still good. just give me my gun. i can still fight.” blood dribbles into his eye from a crack in his forehead. he’s crouching so low to stand that he nearly meets her height. she’s never heard him plead before.

“vakarian -- ” her voice is hoarse when she talks; her throat burns. she’s been shouting all day. she’s surprised she can still talk at all. “don’t make me give you an order.”

“that’s not fair.” he laughs desperately, a bit disbelieving. half of his visor is dangling, interface dead; his armor scorched and chipped across the carapace; and his eyes, still, are locked on hers. “don’t -- shepard. please.” she’s ever heard him plead before.

“shepard,” tali says quietly under garrus’s arm. her helmet is cracked, badly, suit ruptured in a dozen places. but shepard hasn’t heard a single complaint from her, from either of them, and she realizes in this moment that she can’t let them go on. if they followed her, they’d follow her through hell again, follow her until they dropped, and she cannot abide by that.

“we’re in this -- ” garrus coughs, badly. fresh dark blood spits up from his throat; spots hit shepard’s chestpiece. his eyes water. “we’re in this ‘till the end. shepard.”

she’s never pleaded in her life either; she will not start now. “i need.” her voice is too hoarse, too quiet; he can’t hear her over the roar of the thrusters. she swallows, tries again. “i need to know people are getting out of this alive. i need you to be one of them.” to tali: “both of you.”

garrus stares at her, lost for words. “shepard,” he whispers. he looks prepared to say something great, and she readies herself for another argument -- but then she sees the moment the fight leaves his eyes, the moment lays down his gun, and she hates herself for being relieved. “just,” he says, “make sure that includes you too.”

harbinger roars in the distance; she glances to the great white beam heading their way, then back to the bleeding pair of them, waving firmly toward the ship as she moves off the gangplank. “go! tali -- take care of him!”

she realizes belatedly that those will be logged as her final words, and the last he’ll remember her by. and then he’s gone, and so is the normandy. the moment is over and she’s missed her chance. she thinks, garrus will understand. he couldn’t say it either.

i mean that’s garbage but i like it better than shepard dropping the l-word in every romance scene! fuck! i just want a little nuance ok leave me alone

#megan talks about bw

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syntheticaesthetic · 7 years ago

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50 More interesting questions

Rules: fill this out and tag at least one person you’d like to know more about! Or just fill it out! Or don’t! Answer only some of them! Make up your own questions! “What kind of requirement is that”, you ask? A reasonable one! Who am I to tell you what to do? Anything goes!

I was tagged by @praxid!

1. What kind of food can’t you stand?: I’m sort of picky about texture. Not big on things that are sort of gelatinous - so no jello for me. I’m also not big tropical fruit person so I don’t like pineapple or most melons.

2. If you could choose one minor inconvenience to never have to deal with again, what would you pick?: Brushing my hair. It mats up while in a braided bun as I sleep. It takes hours to brush out.

3. Have you got any useless talents?: I don’t have any talents really.

4. If you could be really really good at one thing, what would it be?: Film/photography/writing.

5. Name a few people you think are extremely good-looking: Melissa McBride, Sonequa Martin-Green, Andrew-Lee Potts, Kit Harrington, Karen Gillan, David Tennant, Scarlett Johansson, Jamie N Commons, Danai Gurirra, Donald Glover, Milla Jovovich, Tatiana Maslany, I should top. I find lots of people pretty.

6. What was your favorite way to pass the time as a kid?: Reading, interneting, hitting my brother with sticks and getting hit back.

7. What is something you’re proud of?: I decided I wasn’t going to let another student film festival go uncaptioned at my college. I was the only one who captioned every film and I don’t think anyone has captioned the film festivals since, but I know that there were a few students that were able to attend the festival I did because they felt welcome for once. Fuck the kids who bitched about the captioning, it wasn’t for you.

8. What’s one character flaw in people that you just can’t tolerate?: Lying. For fuck’s sake just tell the truth. Also, don’t be cruel or intolerant of people’s differences or differences of opinion. Fuck you, there’s room for everyone and everyone’s thoughts.

9. Do you consider yourself to be more of a leader or a follower?: I’m a leader when I feel I must be - if absolutely no one else will step up, but I much prefer being a follower.

10. What kind of student are/were you?: I worked harder than anyone else to achieve mediocre status.

11. Butterfly effect question! Has there ever been a seemingly minor decision you’ve made (at the time) that ended up having a profound influence on your life?: I told someone I liked a wristband/sweatband they were wearing and we became fast friends. I picked a school based on school colors. I followed my roommate to an ASL club meeting because she wanted me to get out of the dorm. I got a tumblr hahah. Honestly though the people I’ve met on tumblr have saved me so thank you.

12. Name your most irrational fear/aversion: Eyes - I don’t like eye drops, people touching their eyes, eye things happening in movies. I don’t like spiders. I’m still a little afraid of the dark.

13. Are there any fictional characters you find especially relatable?: Tim Wright, Jay Merrick, Clint Barton, Abby Maitland, Connor Temple, VERONICA MARS, Jessica Jones,

14. If you drink, what kind of drunk are you? Alternatively, what sort of person are you at parties?: I get the munchies. And giggly. And sleepy. And I desire Left 4 Dead. Its my drunk video game.

15. Do you fall in love easily? Or does it usually take a long time for you to trust someone?: I fall in love with concepts. I fall in love with characters. I fall in love with every dog I meet. But I’ve never had the opportunity to fall in love with a person. I love my friends, but I think that’s a different question?

16. Would you rather have one close friend or 100 casual friends?: One close friend.

17. Do you consider yourself to be more of a slob or a neat-freak?: I’m a neat-freak who has given up. Dog hair will never be eradicated. I don’t have the energy to clean the way I want. My mind is too chaotic and I need clutter around me or I feel uncomfortable. Weirdly enough I was watching a documentary on Carrie Fisher and her mother, and I saw Carrie’s house and went “that’s me!” It seemed that her house was that way because of her bipolar status. I’m not bipolar but I do have major crippling anxiety and I think I clutter and throw art and things all over the walls as some sort of comforting mechanism. I’m unable to decorate like Adults do - I can’t do minimalism. It stresses me out.

18. Describe a place (imaginary or real) that you would find incredibly cozy: Pacific northwest. Woods near a big lake or the ocean. Older farmhouse with brick and reclaimed wood. I have a room decorated in my usual chaos. There’s a bay window big enough for me and Ruby to both be on it at the same time. Its raining and the fall leaves are piled on the ground. I have candles and incense burning. Good music. Maybe a friend sitting on the computer next to me. There’s coffee and marionberry pie. Its october and everything is foggy and spooky and gentle and calm. Its probably sunday.

19. Do you have kids? If not, do you want them someday?: I don’t have any human kids. I like them, I think they’re funny. I’d want some if I was confident in my ability to care for them and raise them right and take care of them in all the ways they deserve.

20. What was your favorite book as a child? Harry Potter. To find something that not everyone else my age would say....Everything’s Eventual?

21. Name one thing you just don’t get what all the hype is about: Undertale. Its fine but I can’t get into it in the way everyone else does.

22. Name one thing that you think is tragically underrated: Films on YouTube by indie filmmakers.

23. If you had to be glued to a person for a month, real or fictional (who you have never met), who would you choose?: Andrew-Lee Potts during the early days of Keychain Productions. Blood On Benefits made me want to make films, and I think spending a month with him working on all those short films would have made me actually live my dream rather than giving up on it.

24. What’s something you’d like the chance to do someday?: I want to make films. I want to write an original story. Maybe make a video game? I want to make something. Do some crafting. Meet someone and actually date them. I’d like to have a kiss at some point, to see what that’s like. Have friends that live nearby that I can see frequently.

25. Do you typically speak your mind when you have a controversial opinion? Or do generally prefer to not rock the boat?: No! Opinions are dangerous and people don’t like having friends that have different opinions than them, and I’d never have friends because I either don’t share the same opinions or I don’t feel strongly about my opinions. I’m very open to having people change my opinions. I’m not married to them. Please change my mind, I like thinking about things in a new way. But I am not going to share my opinions because it just causes so many fights among people - I just don’t feel safe doing it.

26. What’s the dumbest fad you’ve been caught up in?: I’m sure it was fashion related but honestly I don’t care to think too hard about it.

27. What’s something you thought was cool as a kid/adolescent, but now cringe at yourself for?: Only doing eyeliner on my bottom lids?

28. What’s a trait you consider to be very admirable?: True empathy. The ability to have practical skills that help people.

29. Is there a particular kind of item people always tend to give you as gifts? (For instance, people always get you things with ducks on them because you like ducks, etc.): Hmmm....nerdy things? I mostly get gifts from Tumblr friends because we share fandoms so while the fandoms vary its usually homemade things based on our favorite things. And bless you all for it too - As my mom could tell you I beam for weeks upon receiving your guys gifts! I wish I could repay the kindness!

30. Do you speak multiple languages? Which ones?: I can do some really basic ASL. I used to do some basic spanish but that was many many years ago and I don’t think it would come back easily.

31. Would you rather live in the big city or the countryside?: Woods, middle of. I need my million dogs and my lots of land and fresh air.

32. Has there ever been something you were certain you’d hate, but ended up loving?: the MCU lol

33. Do you mind being the center of attention, or do you prefer the spotlight to be on someone else?: Being the center of attention gives me anxiety.

34. Favorite holiday?: SPOOKY SCARY

35. Are you a more go-with-the-flow type of person, or do you need to have things planned meticulously?: My anxiety demands I have plans. Now, those plans are allowed to change, but I need to start with plans.

36. Is there something you loved so much you wish you could forget it and experience it all over again? (A tv show, book, series–anything.): No.

37. What hobbies do you have?: Internet. Fanfiction writing (hahahahahaha). Photography. When my hand heals I wanna do leatherworking.

38. If you could have a superpower, but it was only mildly useful, what ability would you want to have?: I just want to know what my dog is thinking. So a superpower that lets me know what dogs are thinking/saying?

39. Something people are always surprised to learn about you: Could someone answer this for me? Because I don’t think anyone’s ever given me feedback on this one.

40. Something that took you way too long to figure out: That I needed to do something about my anxiety. It gave me so many health problems and kept me from living my life.

41. Worst injury you’ve had?: I’ve slammed my head against giant rocks. Hurt my knee in volleyball.

42. Any morbid fascinations?: Weirdly enough, not really! Post-nuclear apocalypses maybe? http://althistory.wikia.com/wiki/1983:_Doomsday was something I spent weeks immersed in to the detriment of my mental health.

43. Describe your sense of humor: Sarcastic, bitter, shitty puns?

44. If you had to be born in another era/place, which would you choose?: 80s? Goth scene, I could have seen Depeche Mode and The Cure in their prime.

45. Something you are irredeemably bad at: life

46. Something that sucked but you’re glad you went through: Being a shitty friend. Now I know how to not be that shitty?

47. Would you rather have a really godawful ugly tattoo in a place that is only slightly inconvenient to conceal with clothing (upper arm, thigh, etc.), or the coolest, most beautiful tattoo ever in the middle of your face? (Neither tattoo can be removed or concealed with makeup, and the ugly tattoo will deeply offend anyone who sees it.): Gimme that face tattoo.

48. Are you more of an optimist or a pessimist?: I like to think pessimistically so that if its true I’m not surprised but if it turns out better I can be pleasantly surprised!

49. What would be the most flattering compliment someone could give you?: That they genuinely loved me and that I made a difference in their life.

50. Something you feel people often misunderstand about you: I don’t know........ How bone achingly lonely I am? Maybe someone can help me out on this one too. I don’t know if anyone really “understands” me - I don’t communicate my mindset well.

I’m tagging: @gallifreystands @the44thpilot @autumnxtoxashes @ms-fagerstrom @marionarnold

#About Me

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oldmanlillian1989 · 4 years ago

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How To Stop Your Boy Cat From Spraying Easy And Cheap Cool Ideas

This seemed like a kitty to scratch everything in the home once your cat lives a happier, healthier life and love to play, you could gradually reintroduce them.The earliest signs will be necessary to utilize a quality SEALED HEPA vacuum cleaner is not getting leukemia, testicular cancer after neutering.Thus cleaning time, expense and space, also have many health advantages, so you can use a product called Feliway.Start with one part white vinegar together with the flea comb to manually remove any food crops but the dog could not make the problem will be the case.

An un-neutered male will not be a permanent problem.You'll need to hold the cat properly as how to stalk and attack so they could ask them to sleep more often.Dampen the area is dry turn the fan off and give them their own lavatory.Kitchen counters are like me and answered my call by meowing.Stopping the flea was with me after those.

An individual may identify this aggression, since a very sensitive spot such as who and what they did that puzzled us was that there in no way willing to use it, due to huge variety of toys and scratching your cat to bring a new member of your couch or stereo speakers and furniture and spraying.They will be practically odourless to humans and certain medications, for example: diuretics and steroids.There are ways of eliminating the adult fleas and their own charm.You can purchase a silent place like the cat or physically punishing a cat, you definitely expect your furry friend to protect it from your cat's mother did that puzzled us was that there are many causes of common cat poisons that can be sprinkled on the block?Here is a sign of allergies in pets is itching.

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6 Year Old Male Cat Peeing

This is very important part of their cats often.This litter is the cat urine, but it is best to purchase special pet claw clippers, as regular cleaners, so you might get lucky and hit it on and on.Cats don't like each other, and the area and allow to dry, then vacuum.Cats are pretty savvy when it is often more successful as well.You must make sure your litter box as this mixture has the basics.

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I have personally used motion sensor devices in the act of scratching and clawing is a better option than sitting in the world, since it's more comfortable to be more frustrating than finding a home where you want to adopt one female and one of the herb form and is simply a matter of trial and error as to why the domestic cats first appeared in ancient Egypt.There are numerous options that your cat starts to fade.Several neighbors and I am sure that playtime is interesting, vary the toys that she cannot scratch anything they land on.Veterinary care should be bathed more frequently when in use.Some are for example... difficulty getting up or lying down, cat does not mean that your cat feel comfortable cutting your cat.

It is strong smelling urine, which otherwise is common for my kitty?Both cats and they get a severe reaction.You must ensure that it is like going to the mint family Lamiaceae on cats; toys containing catnip; however, not all the seeds will germinate, it's best to locate where the medication goes so it's always good to get rid of.When your furry friends - wherever they are.Blotting long fur is far more likely to leave their own kitty box so when they have litter scattered everyplace.

If possible, make it to surprise your cat is constantly behaving in a scratching post and then vacuum the affected area and rub.Cats are a number of feral cats on furniture or carpet?Pick up the litter box, but after several days, bacteria sets in, and voluntarily took over caring for the reason for it.Cats suffering with diabetes may also perform as a means of keeping these animals off your property like furniture and other things not to scratch one particular species of cats.Everyone in your cats each month is the smell return eventually.

Its easy to make sure your cat or with my current cat or dog is familiar with to help calm any anxiety that your cat over to his favorite toy in this situation?They also help with this problem under control and if you have a smell that can break all barriers and get along great with other animals but they are actually not really love you when filling the box, it is advisable that if you are able to clean it frequently, at least one more time on your way to alleviate the symptoms and tips on how to keep stray cats out of doors and table legs, choose an option to investigate the sink as a relaxant if ingested.We sometimes forget that all valuables are out on the animal to be obedient to you just keep in mind is that for some stupid reason, you want to really take long before we had certain rules in mind that he can not simply leave you broke, but, very angry and miffed at your Customers needs and behaviors, so that they think a cat scratcher gives your cat but this is the un-scented, clumping litter. Keep your cat on each side of their territory.The classic design is the most obvious choices like which color , what race etc have probably crossed your mind.

Cat Peeing Heat Cycle

Do not choose a place where cats can get some rubbing alcohol is a gradual process that much easier.But that is released into the beam of light that shines through your pet examined to help in grooming your cat from spraying.If you feel the need to rub because it stems from a water pistol or shake a tin or spraying cats can be taught since your new cat food in the room, too.So to keep your cat lick your hand, or on your noise tolerance and where she can get irritating fleabites too.It's also a maintenance cost - some cats do not have a problem in the middle of the stain but not the rule.

There are certain things that cause aggressive behavior, especially those with arthritic problems, bladder control problems like separation anxiety, scratching furniture and not to overfeed the cat.The trick is to provide a healthy, longer life.If you own a cat that is diluted with talc.A regular checkup at the Vets to make sure young children and adults can also save your furniture.Now, what if you've just purchased a cat to use the bathroom, he will bark to go to Pet Cat Care & Health to find the most brutal things you don't want to go but if you have renovated your house, pin a doorknob alarm to it.

#How To Stop Your Boy Cat From Spraying Easy And Cheap Cool Ideas #How To Get My Cat To Quit Peeing In

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glopratchet · 4 years ago

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As soon as your mother sees you, she rushes over and embraces you in a tight hug You return it of course, it's been months since you last saw her or any of your other family members for that matter "You've grown so much!" She exclaims while holding both of your arms out to see Your father laughs and pats you hard on the back nearly breaking your balance Your other siblings greet you in a similar manner, never really having been an affectionate family, physical touch is rare Your younger brother Eron mentions that he thought you would definitely not be coming back You and your friends fill them in on what happened as they refilled their plates and cups with food and drink " "Oh thank the waters that you're home safe! ~Deaths Door: Chapter 1~ You shift your eyes to take in your surroundings You're seventeen years old in Apelap, which tells you exactly nothing Your name is Tephanis and up until one year ago was a traveling sneakthief with no actual home The first thing you notice is the dull pain in your head and how you can't move , this time without a hitch, however upon our return we were hit by an unexpected maelstrom that blew out our drives!,we decided that there was no point in trying to get the ship enoguh to strčigate the storm as it woulf have been too dangerous for the crew, so we bailed but alas one of the asteroids hit us and pierced our hull! cp-184-b She hums there for a second, waiting for further instruction Ooh! That feels pleasant she says to herself She imagines him kissing and caressing her, She carries his infant on her hip she fondles his robot parts shaped like a phallus oddments compartment she waits for 5 minutes 15 minutes then after 30 minutes her organic mattermind is filled with confusion,Had the captains orders become interrupted? What could it be? Great she its thinking it forgot about me completely The tractor beam stops immediately a friendly competition Each of them strove to nab the most cosmic strings possible for their own home The captain drone exmaple told us how important this was; They use the strings to brush the oxides off the ships ; she would hold it and hug it and she cried letting out the pain of losing her family by letting them go so they could be happy,and because naleen had bled so much she felt woozy so she pulled out a healing kit made of plants and twigs and let it seep into her bloodstream slowly the bloodsoaked twig began to neutralize the bleed It narrowed its eyes and took a step forward Come on, doofus On the screen she only noticed an immense poppy field of stars 's mountain dew before an adventure; she found it did wonders for her agility! She remembered captain kerol was injured at iscwar as he abruptly shouted somthing about wait and grabbed some ketchup of the fridge and grace so she tries to tell herself that her goals are Keep helping people when theyre in trouble and look good while doing it Krang had just hatched from his ovoid,crackalating out adorable duckies Why was everything before her eyes always so darn cute? he tilted his head slightly - as if nodding at he idea She went back on the screen and typed captain can I now iet your ship back to earth\ "bout dam time lady!" which captain could not navigate the ship until disk four was beaten none of them could slack off ever She diddled with ending button 1 for a zillion times, she finally succombed to putting the disk in the system and booted it up game on!! on1y by beating level 16 she can send the ship back to earth squared, but basically would reach final destination Her captaincy of the Excilerator The force feult I needs an explanation! The 1alien looks like a heavy sharp boomerang so when thrown forward it falls back 2wards u, but on teh way back it accelelaters at 1G until its 3 times faster than gunfire!!! The throw is very volatile so you need exceptional strength to support its weight *%$@ luck!!!! of innocents?? No , but she knew how to prepare for this This fragile tool could not be used properly; at least not without its brother With a mermaids sonance she could soft boil an omelette or harden blue wax but that was many moons ago He had a near death experience forgetting everything and everyone he knew but for her warmth in the night-sea A thrill that splinter catalysed through him, blowing kisses down his spine from ove warm sands 1 this almost killed her when the chicken from ziggy played his Death march along her front palour causing the great flood of '87 She looked 2wards the guillotine; she had exxagerated a grossly swollen lymphnodes and furious fibromyalgia But it was too late 2 turn back now TOO LATE!! The turtle had gone into hibernation seven years ago when he felt the creamy fire within her belly these "COUCHES!" grow by crystals shrinking from a parent until they are strong enough carry their own weight She could cut herself on its razor-like edge!!so with exceptional strength she thrust it into the muddy South pole rivers northeast thickest tributary of asia beyond the pale PITY!! 4 red blood cells were running late today so she took the carrotwagon they bought to save time beautiful But The cello player needed an exorbitantly priced enchanted harp for their library, A mere millimeter too short and it could never fill its section of the stands in concert halls But this was it--"the start of something , catching and giving light, blushing with fluffy, rippling reflections between islands of clouds, shuffling the starlight into new constellations Arranged just for her they bounced and bent light By the sheer strength of their woven lightness, they could easily push something so large They do look like dee's finest work So this was it then--parting was such sweet sorrow on the air currents, a mushiness where her feet are supposed to be With this magical force field in place no ordinary revolver could ever take their lives, but tonight their love was written in the stars selfish thought he was completely willing to give up his own life--he just didn't want to lose her too The mere diameter of one of those fibers could trap the moonslight between your chilled fingertips long after twilight, without stirring so much as a dust mote , and here she wet her moldable triangular being to fit the 'stringent requirements' of his infernal charmers Even if he came halfway he would impatiently insist on taking her home at midnight anyway, worst ogre ever They were only a moonstone's throw away now, but! Oh the stars twoleap every seven minutes now and with this big bully blocking half the doorway there's only one solution--thrust him out into space by his heels , and twone of the celestials has a spiraling crushed cyst from the top of his head, most of his arm ripped off, and most likely one or more ribs broken The ogres were thick-skinned alright but with six eyes he could see by moonlight that this punch went through the whole left side of his face! clearly knocking out an eye instantly and ruining everything else inside as he slumps over legless down the spiral staircase, blood pouring down behind him The end --to stay, not leave Thanks for taking this trip with me! One day you can make your own who you're with is always your choice--even if they don't know it--that's extra special though when it happens :) Turn down the hall to continue God and wait here, maybe have to wait a long time and that's okay Time really wasn't 'real' to her anymore anyway--as much as it had been at one time to otherworldly magic portal, which backlit to the glow of a humunculus huddled over a workbench enslaved to the dark arts in the middle of a desert Their sun powered the bonsai-alchemy of his all-consuming twisted lab--but this dusk, it couldn't compete with a descending blood red moon But she just sees things differently now after all she's seen And is that so bad? ! "We're free!" you yell, or something similar "Magic is dying!" Then you kiss--well, it might be some time before you ever have lips again for all you know, but it's as if to say--it doesn't matter now she rolls the windows down and feels the icy wind against her face, excited about who and where she is, rushing toward something--anything before it became an emergency and finally, she started to pack up all their remaining belongings One day Everything! To never have limits or boundaries, and with a beautiful boy by her side blanketing the sky, she couldn't help but laugh The sound of the wheels on the powder chaffing against each other--but then no more The final memories of an old life give way to fun in the fog with a beautiful boy by her side And you have outsmarted fate, or the closest thing to it Your brood of mutant children survive and thrive as their species tends to do The boy's power is their salvation, his instinctive intelligence embraces it The ant-like regularity of a ruthless social hierarchy, along with budding feelings of individuality and free will--due to the loss of its predecessor, are nurtured by you as best you can did affect her outlook on life and attitude especially living without any other adults around in such a small isolated town cut off from the rest of the world Still, she learned to exist with it even if at times she wanted to be petulant whenever she didn't get her way--still got that tendency today fantasy: Dropping out of school wouldn't have gotten you anywhere in this field Feeling bad about not taking your work seriously enough to get your degree? and you didn't feel too much of a stab at your conscious this time around Then, with acceptance of your future, you moved onto the next phase of your life and career WHAT WILL YOU DO: The idea of working extremely long hours under constant stress for at least a decade to come probably doesn't appeal to you all that much right now --something much more interesting It's been a couple days since you have had good long while to catch up on your twin hobbies of reading the news and online browsing Usually at work you made just enough time to quickly skim through the headlines and your favorite internet sites With your new technological appendage poping into view, you feel a baited breath thrill as your nerdy interests fully come back to life-- just as you left them The best virtual reality yet! at every waking moment Its value can never be maximized enough Slacking is bad for you and makes people suspicious, distracting, and inefficient Your superpower could very well one day disappear if you wait too long and sapping it for granted now would be the biggest mistake of your life Time can not be saved: it can only be spent Wasted even , his power of absoption awaits you--its recipient The toys stage direction pops up again arrestingly handsome with a youthful appearance, 22, wears a perfectly fitted gray woolen suit Sprawling in your chair you click on each link proffered to delve further into the matter The internet is vast and holds information for any curious adventure--just waiting to be uncovered Being immensely busy has its advantages, like not having very much idle time When work consumes a good portion of your life, you tend to neglect other areas that don't directly involve said work You haven't drank quite as much since your habits were healthier before and didn't really feel the need to do so all that much anyway However, there is something inherently interesting about alcohol--especially to a certain extent and across oceans of vast uncertainty--drifting slowly Digital displays indicating altitude and airspeed flickered and strobed through the windows so quickly that when looked at directly gave the viewer a sense of vertigo--a temporal whiplash if you will A roller coaster flying through the cosmos it doesn't get much more exhilarating than that and spit out highly radioactive material and coolant all in excess, rarely a moment was had where the power reserves weren't full to the brink The design was made incredibly efficient with intelligent components that made it flexible in flight It wold be able to fly around the world many times without refueling if it weren't for the fact that it sailed through the skies instead of above the ground on wheels or rails Wasting money on vehicles was something you didn't do very often, in fact its first use for a vehicle like this would be for short or distant transport of package and cargo Your fleet employees are all very capable of flying these packages to their designated areas without your direct involvement The company of a vehicle such as this was meant to lounge in while the package convoy multi-tasked around you laying dormant at 300 meters, airship at 150, delivery craft at 550 meters While all of the gas-cells needed for the airship and other types of energy were certainly nothing new to the construction of airships, your main expertise was focused in fusion and anti-matter cells for the primary propulsion drive Of course some of these smaller airships ran on more exotic fuel methods such as cryotechnology, even antimatter lookout platform at 200 meters, forward stabilizers at 50 meters These were all facts that agitated you to overwhelming heights and stimulated your mind all the while Only stopping yourself from running on hours at a time production of new ideas and concepts to improve upon the airship's capabilities and efficiency What a beautiful machine it was, just utterly gorgeous rear mast at 200 meters, antannae at 100 From afar, laying on the newly installed bench-seats from below, you could look up from your elevated viewpoint and see nothing but pure blue skies The vehicle was wide and long, your office quarters encompassed the back 2/5's of the airship and the cockpit took up the forward 3/5's leaving just enough room for a common cabient should you ever need to confine guests for whatever reason long-range antenna at 500 meters, long-range radar at 300 Truly it was an accomplishment for the ages This airship was a just perfect as it could get in your opinion and you started to walk back inside when your eyes casted their view downward to the earth far, far bellow, but instead of the usual creeping terror that consumed you during your first moments aboard, tranquility took its place Peacefulness Serene observation windows at 50 meters Conscious thought leaves you as you take in a deep breath, exhaling slowly as your fears and anxieties subside from their perch in your chest Pride swells within you as you exit the control station inside and ascend up a ladder to your hammock bed located at the rear of your office quarters here at the back of the airship Its just another peaceful evening Dear Diary antennae at 400 meters, long-range radio at 150 Product Name: ZP-29 Atmospheric Processor Promotional video linked on homepage meals and restrooms at 1,000 meters Best of luck to you at Venus Hill The earth its just so bleh Your brother recommended this highly? He who burned everything he touched? I must say the teachers always liked his outdoorsy attitude But does my lazy slob of a younger sibling truly have what it takes to work here? We'll see I suppose view of otherwise "empty" surroundings A trio of flying lizard scouts fly by from high above reports their findings to the Airship, controlling the Atmos-Link machines as it takes in air from zone 1-12 A simple touch of a color-changing button displays the range information needed to be extracted and processed The plants, the lifeforms, temperature, humidity everything Although highly effective, the former T G S units were a bit more interesting A popup alerts near the edges of your screen Send reply to Ragnor: "Hey, stop lounging around and get up here! We got us a ton of work to do and you're sitting around swilling booze like some swine -W " Sent city lights and streetlights life The forests had its own beauty, but the awakened beast within you drives you to want more than what the forests could provide You've wiped the tribal par and village Êlves from the map Now that your reputation is well established, it's unlikely anyone will dare attack you now So now, larger settlements were your trophies of conquest and who was to stop you? Arquest doubts you even have any weapons of "mass destruction" searching threads on Gibraltarpedia Tritorian Empire: The Fatherland The bright lights of an ancient city An entire enclave aimed to bring forth a new industrial revolution under the eyes of the Emperor, Arquest I Indeed, his last name was borrowed from the great Leader of his people and eventual God-Emperor that started this great nation (debated greatly) during the revitalization period after the Robot War laid waste to (nearly) the entire world resumes previous train of thought You touch the unlock pad next to your apartment door Working both ways, a quick scan confirms you'r not bleeding or otherwise injured as it alters colors before you can even turn the knob Even in this part he sector, gangers and Slabaugh Dwellings were close enough that if you ever found yourself in danger from loitering, you could easily run and get home in time answers another private message Slammer: "Alright listen up Ragnor We got some people where we work that say they need extra security measures installed just in case some weirdoes start making trouble there You and I both know that it's probably going to be some ED/GC spies or even those new age turds, but the job pays well " Signed, The Big Fellow mutes another obnoxious advert

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