#and other things phannies post on tumblr.com

[thegirlinprague]

[antiadvil]

tumblr.com/liked/by/danielhowell

1k, PG13

Dan scrolls through tumblr, liking things. Oh, did I mention that he just got married?

A/N: for the pff bingo fest. this prompt is author's choice (wedding, also, dan is a little shit who fucks with the hearts and souls of phannies) because I am lazy and only fills one prompt because I am unimaginative. thanks to @flymetomanchester for betaing and here’s my card

ao3

It was a week after their wedding that Dan decided to say something about it to the internet. Nothing huge, of course. He had never wanted, and still didn’t want, information about his relationship with Phil to be something easily available to anyone with an internet connection. Of course, it was too late for that now. All he could do was play damage control.

If things were different, he sometimes thought, everything would be different. If they had never hidden their relationship, maybe it wouldn't be such a big deal now that they were finally being more open about it. If they were a straight couple, maybe it wouldn't ever have been such a big deal. But they hadn't, and they weren't, and now Dan was scrolling through his tumblr tag, dealing with the consequences of being born queer and the decisions he had made while trying to preserve a fragile career, his relationship with his family, and his relationship with someone who he had desperately hoped would someday be a part of his family.

There wasn't anything very interesting. He and Phil had been trying to stay vaguely active on social media while not posting anything too interesting so no one would notice anything was out of place, but weirdly, the tag was still full of speculation.

“guys they're up to something. SOMETHING.”

“Does anyone else think it's weird that they're posting so regularly? What are you trying to hide lmfao @AmazingPhil @danielhowell”

“... something weird is going on. getting vibes. will update later.”

He clicked on the last post, curious about the update. The first few pages of the blog were asks, probably about said update- Dan skipped them until he found the original post and then scrolled backwards, skimming the posts in the order they were originally posted in.

Blah, blah, blah, a lot of “evidence” that mostly came down to the fact that he and Phil had been posting “too much” with photos and videos that could have been taken at any time, which was kind of flimsy evidence, really, but then again, it was true, wasn’t it? He and Phil were up to something, just not something they planned to share in its entirety with their audience.

He scrolled further up, into the wall of asks. “just say what you think they’re doing already,” read the first one. The response startled him so much he dropped his coffee mug.

It shattered on the kitchen floor beneath him.

“Everything all right in there?” Phil called from the other room.

“Yeah, fine,” Dan called back, trying to keep his voice even.

He had gone on tumblr hoping to make a statement. He hadn’t actually expected to find anything to make a statement on.

“getting married probably,” said the blogger’s response.

Never in a million years did Dan think someone would actually guess. His fandom always thought something was going to happen. That was what happened when large groups of people tried to tune into whatever weird biorhythms determined his upload schedule. They were right sometimes, but when they were, it was more by chance than anything else. Even when they were right that something was about to happen, itt was pretty rare that they were right about what it was.

He and Phil usually found their fans’ conspiracy theories funny. But somehow, he couldn’t bring himself to laugh at this post.

This was his life now, he reminded himself. There was nothing he could do about it short of putting his and Phil’s phones in a blender and disconnecting their wifi router. All he could do now was play damage control.

Sometimes, though, he didn't want to play damage control.

His cursor hovered over the like button.

He thought about it.

This click would change nothing. And everything. He could play it off as a joke. Most people would probably assume it was without Dan having to say a thing. He wouldn't be explicitly confirming anything- there wouldn't be any news articles. Dan was a celebrity, but not so much of a celebrity that him liking a tumblr post would be news. Probably.

But the person who posted this post would know in seconds. The rest of his fandom would know in hours.

He clicked. The like button- on this theme, just a simple piece of text saying “like”- now said “liked.” Dan counted to thirty before refreshing the page.

A new post had appeared: a reblog of the original with a screenshot of dan’s like and the caption “OMG WTF AFDHSJKAFG YOU CAN’T JUST FUCKING DO THAT!!”

Dan laughed, one of the longest and hardest laughs he’d laughed in a long time. He laughed so hard that he heard Phil calling from the living room again, but couldn’t reply. He heard Phil’s footsteps, but couldn’t be bothered to close his laptop.

“Seriously, what is so funny? And why is your coffee mug-” Phil bent over Dan’s shoulder to look at his laptop. He groaned. “Dan!”

“Sorry,” Dan wheezed, “But-” He dissolved back into laughter.

Phil refreshed the page and giggled.

“It’s kind of funny,” Dan gasped. “You have to admit.”

“Kind of,” Phil admitted. Dan let himself get lost in the upward curve of his boyfriend’s lips- no, husband’s, he kept reminding himself, Phil was his husband now.

Phil noticed Dan staring and his smile grew. “How about you leave the internet alone for a bit?”

Dan opened his mouth to protest.

“No. You’ve wreaked enough havoc for today.” Phil shut the lid of Dan’s laptop and pulled it away.

“Wait,” Dan whined, “I was going to unlike it.”

Phil’s eyes widened as he moved backwards, clutching Dan’s laptop to his chest. “You’re a monster.”

“Yeah,” Dan said. “Gimme.”

“No.”

“Please? It’ll be hilarious.”

“No.”

“You’re the worst boyfriend ever.”

Phil’s face lit up. “Husband.”

Dan’s heart fluttered. “You’re the worst husband ever. Now give me my laptop back so I can ruin a teenage girl’s day by unliking her tumblr post about our relationship.”

“With great power comes great responsibility, and you are not being very responsible right now.”

Dan sank back into his chair, pouting. “You’re mean.”

Phil put Dan’s laptop back on the table. “Love you too,” he said, dropping a kiss on Dan’s head. “Now, what were you thinking for dinner?”

“Human suffering,” Dan said.

“Takeaway it is,” Phil said. “Anything else?”

“Don’t forget the dips.”

“I would never.”

Phil cleaned up Dan’s broken coffee mug. By the time their takeaway arrived half an hour later, Dan had completely forgotten about tumblr.