#and oh god the rich people's dialogues are so cringe yet feel so real

[ladsofsorrow24]

okay i got it

glass onion is SO FUCKING GREAT.

[dalekofchaos]

My biggest problems with the Tim Burton Batman movies

Batman 1989 and Batman Returns are viewed as classics and helped restore Batman as a dark hero. And they are far better than the Schumacher movies.  Today, most people remember Schumacher as having ruined the legacy of the cinematic Batman, and with good reason. After all, he is the one that put nipples on the Batsuit, gave Batman a credit card, and showed us all the Batsmile. He took a tortured, haunted character with psychological issues and turned him into a real life cartoon. The absurdity of Schumacher’s films also retroactively made Tim Burton’s films better in the minds and memories of fans. Compared to the colorfulness and camp of Batman Forever and especially Batman & Robin, Burton’s films were suddenly remembered as having been dark and brooding affairs that treated the material seriously. But not really. Tim Burton is a legendary filmmaker, a visual genius whose work has changed Hollywood. He brings strange and offbeat but lovable characters to life within universes that look like something from our imagination. Edward Scissorhands and Big Fish alone are a treat for the eyes. Yet his two films set in Gotham City, 1989’s Batman and 1992’s Batman Returns, were not nearly as profound — or as good — as your recollection would have you believe. They’ve aged poorly, yes, but they were not all that good when they were released. It puzzles me that anyone finds any of these movies better than Batman Begins or The Dark Knight. These are my biggest issues with the Tim Burton Batman movies.

The villains are more focused than on Batman. I don’t like it that we know more about The Joker than we do about Batman. We are never supposed to get a definitive origin for The Joker. And we have less focus on Batman as a character, I mean he’s reduced to a side character in Batman Returns. We barely know ANYTHING about Keaton’s Bruce Wayne, let alone his Batman. Burton not understanding the character of Bruce Wayne/Batman is one thing, but he doesn’t even care about him. Perhaps the biggest issue with the films is that he is completely focused on the supporting characters. There are three origin stories in those two films — one in Batman, two in Batman Returns — and none of them tell the story of Bruce Wayne/Batman. All we learn about Bruce Wayne is that his parents were murdered through a flashback and a scene of Alexander Knox and Vicki Vale reading old newspaper articles. Who is Bruce Wayne? What role did his parents play in his life? When did he dedicate his life to fighting crime? How did he come up with the symbol of the bat? When and how did he construct the Batcave? Does he have any training?  We know virtually nothing about the titular character. Christopher Nolan’s Batman Begins goes to great lengths to explain how Wayne got his hands on all of the gear and gadgets that he would use in his war on crime, but Burton never once takes the time to analyze how Bruce Wayne turned himself into the Caped Crusader.  I think the worst thing about these movies is Burton doesn't care about Batman as a character. There is no origin movie so we do not see why he chooses to become Batman, the only reason we get is "just something I have to do" no mention of training his entire life. We meet him as an adult Batman and all we know is he likes to play dead, he's rich and a bit crazy and he iis what the plot needs him to be. Every time Michael Keaton tells people “I’m Batman” I cringe, Keaton you were not Batman, you were Burton Murderman.

The Joker is an eccentric mobster, not The Joker. While I enjoyed Jack’s Joker, he just seems like a mildly crazy eccentric mobster. In my opinion The Joker should be a psychopathic killer clown who symbolizes the randomness of crime, who thinks life is the joke and death is the punchline, with Jack’s Joker we get the twisted sense of humor, we don’t get the randomness of a crime we get a crazed eccentric mob boss. And when I think about it, Jack Nicholson just did not play The Joker. He changes from scene to scene, with no defining characteristics. The only really clear thing about him is that he is pining after the same woman as Bruce Wayne AND Batman. Worst of all, we are given a definitive origin of his character, including a name, an explanation for why his skin is white and his hair is green. And in giving him these characteristics, we never get a fully-formed Joker. He always remains nothing more than a mentally-ill gangster, out for revenge. Sure, The Joker is the same villain whose identity is ever-evolving. But here, he doesn’t even seem to remember that he IS The Joker. And this is tragic, as he’s being portrayed by Jack Nicholson. Imagine if Nicholson had the chance to play a version of The Joker who made sense, and who matched the villain we know from the source material.

The Joker kills Thomas and Martha Wayne. I feel like this was solely done just so Burton can have the excuse for Batman to kill Joker and criminals in general. Even screen writer Sam Hamm came clean and said he did not have Joker kill Batman’s parents, it was Tim Burton’s idea. You know it’s stupid when your own screen writer throws an incompetent director under the bus. 

Bad fighting. Batman isn’t that great at fighting. There are very few fight scenes in either film. When we see Batman fighting, we see a slow, lumbering, cumbersome Batman that throws a punch or two and maybe a kick before running away. He also loses as many fights as he wins, getting pummeled by the Joker’s henchmen and having his batarang taken away by a small poodle. Several times, he defeats the bad guys not with skill or training, but through gimmicks or luck. 

Batman kills. Batman kills. I don’t think Batman should ever kill. In both of the movies he’s a mass murdering thug. He  kills Joker’s thugs in Ace Chemicals without remorse and practically blows them up. Knocking that one Joker thug against the cathedral bell pretty much killed him and while he was trying to capture The Joker, he pretty much killed him. Oh god it gets worse in Batman Returns. He incinerates one of Penguin’s henchmen with the Batmobile and straps a bomb to another. Batman killing is boring. Batman not killing is what makes him so compelling, if he kills criminals, there is no moral conflict,  if he kills criminals, there is no moral conflict, he is no better than the Punisher, Wolverine or any other dark edgy hero. Burton making Bruce a killer, making the conflict as simply as Batman wants to stop and kill The Joker because The Joker killed his parents does not do justice to their fascinating dynamic.

I do not like how The Penguin have clown henchmen and The Joker has just regular thugs for henchmen. Seems like it’s reversed.

As much as I love Burtonverse Batmobile, I do not understand HOW the armor functions properly in real life, nor do I understand the pole in Batman Returns fits in the Batmobile like really? HOW?????

Batman and Gordon's relationship. Jim Gordon is made into such a completely irrelevant character. They took one of the most important aspects of the Batman myth and made him into a bumbling, slapstickish cartoon police chief. If Burton had treated his source material with more respect, Gordon wouldn’t be such an irrelevant character. Commissioner Gordon is one of the first two characters in Batman, ever. He and Bruce Wayne appear on the very first page of Detective Comics #27 together. He has a major role in every great Batman comic and graphic novel of all time. Instead, he is made into an incompetent joke who you probably don’t even recall being in Burton’s Batman. He also has virtually no interaction with Commissioner Gordon. Historically, Gordon, the only honest cop in Gotham, and Batman have had a strong bond, formed and fortified through their shared goal of cleaning up the city and their experiences therein, but in Burton’s films, Gordon is just another hapless cop that Batman largely ignores and occasionally tolerates. And in the Schumacher films, Gordon is a bumbling stooge who needs Batman to clean up his mess.

The complete waste of Billy Dee Williams as Harvey Dent. Has no interaction with Batman and never works with him. He barely has a presence. This could've been fixed by making him Two-Face, but Harvey Dent needed to have a presence in Gotham before becoming Two-Face for his fall to mean anything

The Penguin isn't his own villain. He is a puppet for Max and that's just dumb, as enjoyable as Walken was, his character really should not have existed at all. Being born with deformities is fine, but what is overkill is being thrown down a sewer and being raised by Penguins. Burton took Oswald Cobblepot, an overweight, but well-dressed criminal mastermind with a large vocabulary, and turned him into a dirty circus sideshow, an “aquatic bird-boy.” His vision of the Penguin bleeds black and green, has flippers for hands, lives in the sewer, wears a filthy onesie, rides a giant rubber duck, and is obsessed with sex. He also wants to murder sleeping children, but not before blowing off their genitalia: “Male and female! Hell, the sexes are equal with their erogenous zones blown sky high!” That’s an actual line of dialogue. The Penguin should be a gentleman of crime and mockery of high society with an affinity of birds.  Duplicitous mob boss. A guy who EVERYBODY knows is dirty, but he’s smart enough to make sure that there’s just enough deniability for him to get away with it. And JUST enough too, ‘cause he likes rubbing it in Batman’s face that nothing sticks to him. He is a criminal mastermind who is so smart that Batman considers him to be equal or smarter to him. Cares nothing for money or wanting to fit in, all he cares for is a complex caper, wanting to wet his beak and to rub it in Batman’s face.

Catwoman's origin. After being pushed out of a (tiny) window from the top floor of a building, Selina Kyle plummets to the concrete…only to be brought back to life…by cats? And then she goes home in a zombie-like state, rips her clothes apart, shoves her stuffed animals down the sink, spray paints her dollhouse, and sews together her suit? This is important, but knowing how and why Batman came to be doesn’t matter? Catwoman is a sleek, deceptive cat burglar, but Tim Burton decided to take the name literally, turning her into a half-cat, half-woman that drinks milk, eats birds, has nine lives, and doesn’t steal anything. 

[ramblingshit]

Persuasion 1995

The incoherent rambling commentary of a 3am viewing.

we start in a boat -- wait have i done this one before -- who cares CIARAN HINDS BBYYYY. I have sheep too just in my front yard ya know. that's just how it be. here's some boats - i can see where they pasted the fake boats in teh background i love it .calm nice piano music. dude is cutting the lawn people out here with top hats and wigs. oh dear everyone pissy SHOW ME THE MONEYYYY. lots of wigs and coats and here's a lady in a turban she's definitely the worldy kind. sailors n shit sitting drinking wine and smoking. oh god who's this. i can't hear the dialogue over my laptop fan. this ol mate's a fop i hate his voice. oh dear he's supposed to be a moron huh. oh whoops the fop is a baronet and he is poorr lol sucked in he got debtss extreme debts you musssttt retreennnnnchh. the neighbours be tryna help out and hereeee is Anne eyy. wow eatin grapes and sorbet and they're goin to Bath. he hates sailors and now he has to be ol mate's tenant. ohh Anne knows about the admiral and this fop keeps talking nonsense. a lady with no children has the best furniture. WENTWORTH she gasps. and she is dramatic and sad, puts her tea down takes a breath by the window and comes back takes up her tea and sits down damn. aww Ann---OH 'since no one will want you in bath its best you stay here!' what a fkn bitch what is happening. ITS AUNT PETUNIAA. naww anne is so cute and petite and so miserable. her sister looks cruel and stupid and her dad is just as bad honestly. damn they got Greek statues in their giant house. her sister. is. a . bitch. fuck me. give her like two lists and tells her to go visit everyone in the parish. damn all the peeps glared at him as he left like give us the money you foppish twat. Poor Anne, that is a fkn big ass house. everyone's watching em leave. ohhh cows. oop packing up the house, sheets over the furniture, she's lucky they got like a thousand servants. she's found something in teh box - it's a letter in the shape of a boat ooh i wonder who its from. she's been miserable for years; she hates Bath; her mum's dead and everything went to shit after that - her dad's a moron, her sister's a bitch, she's out here gonna fixedly avoid risking meeting him. Lady Russell - she's the one tsk tsk. oooh Annneeeee she is persuaded despite disapproval and anxiety of his prospects - she was 19 and she wanted to fuck and Lady Russell told her to fuck him off because he was a peasant damn fuck Lady Russell; she just brushes Jane off like shut up little girl I'm right you're wrong move on dumbass. And Anne's like, did you not hear me - i literally just tried to tell you I hate my fucking life and I miss him and I love him and I kinda resent you for telling me to say no. More sheep and a puppy, and close up view of sheep. dad and sister got to ride in a fancy carriage and Anne has to ride in a wagon that's a bit rough. I like her bonnet. oh my god her sister i love her. 'i am soooooooo ill' - she's searching for attention; lonely and miserable and sad and a little bitter. Mary you poor girl leave Anne alone none of that emotional manipulation. 'oh i was very well yesterday, it's just today' yeah alright. sounds like Charles isn't as rich as the Elliots and Mary's not happy about it.  ohh i know this lady and of course Anne can play piano very well and everyone knows it -- Mary tryna cut in like yes i'm as accomplished as Anne and they're awkward like ehhhh but we like watching you dance and Anne doesn't dance so there you go and she sits there with an awkward cringe 'no'. Mary goes off and sulks and Charles rolls his eyes. The Musgroves are rich and friends ohmygod Mary don't be embarrassing in your bitterness yikes and we cut and Mary was there but now Mrs Musgrove and Anne are sitting in teh same spot - I like Mrs M's dress, even the lace around her shoulders that matches the hat I don't know it just seems refined or something. There's lots of very swift conversations - good pace just like my fingers and brain can't keep up yo. Yikes Mrs M thinks Mary is a shit mum; Mary says Mrs M riles em up with lollies; Charles says Mary interferes and fancies herself ill; Mrs M tells the kids are so naughty the only way to keep em chill is to feed them cake; dunno who this girl is (Henrietta?) anyway the brown haired petite one, they're sitting in the window, Anne's finished her tea by now damn how is she so casually moving from person to person how long have they been chillin with the Musgroves? anyway she's tea-less and talking with brown-haired-possibly-Henrietta: wants Mary to stop being rude over Mrs M even though she has precedent to no one likes her for it; blondish sister now and Anne's got more tea and this one says Mrs M's not one for etiquette she just wants cake lmaooooo; Mary is superior and wants her to persuade Charles that she is very very ill. Anne and Charles sigh on the couch together. Now only Charles has got a tea. okay never mind Mary's a bit more like her sister than I thought. oh my god kids ew. it's petunia looking high as a kite ahaha i wish i was her naw petunia was like idc bout your sister I wanted to meet you btw ol mate is married and Anne's like kill me now I guess. she's horrified, shocked, wants to find an ant hill to bury herself in. god mary's a bitch i take back everything i said about her but all is well Anne has a new friend. she's got a very good memory, Anne does, naw and she's good with her nephews. what's this girls name plz tell me oh it is Henrietta. oh damn they're invited to the house tonight to 'meet Mr Frederick WEntowORTH by ALL aCOunts a most CHarMinG anD agreEable GeNtlemAn' Anne could not look more uspet. fixing her hair in the mirror - there's boys screaming ohh no a child what's happened oh god Mary's screaming for Anne the boy has broken his collarbone - she's knowledgeable chatting with the doctor - Charles marches in like wtf my dumbass kid out here falling out of trees - it's his first born the kid looks so fkn miserable that's hilarious now he's off to dinner cause -- oh damn i forgot they wear gloves. this kid's just lying there. ahah Mary doesn't give a fuck about her kids she just wants to be in on everything -- damn--"you are the properest person to sit with the boy. but you haven't a mothers feelings, have you?' like BITCH she's just offered to sit here so you can go to dinner and you're out here being a fucking cunt for no reason? gtfo. and the scene just changes with that damn savage leave Anne be she deserves better than this. oh damn i know that cheekbone. Anne's been out here watching this kid all night like literally and Mary shrugs off that Wentworth barely asked after her because they're barely acquaintances and says he and Charles are out shooting and Anne's tense like uhh they're not coming here tho right and just as Mary's like nah BAM SURPRISE BITCH o no O NO and THERE HE IS DRAMATIC ZOOM HE DOESNT EVEN LOOK AT HER SHE LOOKS TERRIFIED, HE BARELY GLANCES AT HER, doesn't talk to her, she grips the chair tight fuck he's hot. another swift glance and he's gone. dramatic zooms all around. Mary returned, didn't even look at her injured child who has a big ass cut on his face who's just sitting in the corner looking plain and miserable and wentworth - "you were so altered he would not have known you again' - scene cuts to her sitting in front of a mirror looking fucking sadddddd. they're all at dinner together fuck me he is so hot my god. the girls are all over him and he's enchanting everyone with his stories and of course the reason why he first went out comes up and he's like 'i was extremely keen... to be at sea. i was extremely keen. i badly wanted to be doing something.' the PAIn in his eyes, the tight swallow as he turned to listen to the Admiral, who sits Right next to Anne who's sorta just sitting with wide eyes staring at the salad bowl. then the admiral leans over 'when a man has no wife he wants to be afloat again' and she's like yeah wow ah ha ha ah 'yes well i had no wife - pity the essex (?? dunno what that means but I GET THE POINT)" and then he looks at her properly for the first time and i want to die and she wants to die and he wants to die and we are all quite miserable where we are BUT WE ARE ONLY A HALF HOUR IN and we move on talkin bout his ship crap just wait im eating chocolate but i have many thoughts. sorry honestly theres no time to take a breath in this movie i love it but damn it doesn't give one enough time to write and snack. RIGHT - ol mate's declared he'll never have a woman on his ship because its not pink and frilly enough and petunia's stepped in like fkn excuse me m8 wanna say that again? and also is Anne and petunia related because they are looking very similar to me right now??? they're not related. alright pulling us back yet again, I'm so sorry this is a mess I'm eating chocolate at 1 am and watching Persuasion, I think you can guess how my day has been. they keep talking about him getting married and he laughs and jokes it off and then excuses himself like yeah real smooth yeeting yourself outta here dude at that certain topic hanging around. naww the only time petunia felt scared or bad was when she was away from her husband this is adorable. ol mate's tryna play the piano to the amusement of the girls, sees Anne sneaking up to listen and immediately hurries outta there, face pale never moved so fast in his life i bet and they all follow him and she just sits down and starts playing while everyone dances. for people who were so refined they danced like crazy people --- 'no never she has quite given up dancing' Wentworth's face falls and he looks at her and she looks away from him come on guys you are hurting me. some guy has just rocked up who the heck is Henry - a cousin? who is not --- 20,000 pounds fuck me. Charles and Mary; wait we're talking about Henry. oh my god, they're planning who's gonna marry who - Henrietta and lousia and henry and wentworth 'what say you Anne, which one is the Captain in love with? she laughs slightly - I've never seen someone so depressed before in my life, at least not in a romance . this is actually a really sad story ya know, Wentworth got rejected and fled to sea; and Anne rejected him and became depressed about it for years. damn. anyway these girls can't go anywhere without Mary butting in, now they're going for a long walk or something and Mary's forcibly inserted herself and they look at each other and the poor kid is sitting with his arm in a bandage that goes round his neck? with that scratch on his face and adorable little round glasses sitting at the table with some cake and a puzzle he's doing with Anne like please don't abandon the suffering child has he even had any panadol?? Who the hell is looking after this kid if they're all going on this long walk - now Charles and Wentworth too. Charles helps two of em over, Wentworth helps Louisa over the fence, and Anne has to help herself over, which she does without hesitation good girl you do you fam. yikes Charles and that are going to Winthrop or something where Charles' aunt lives and Mary's offended to have such connections and refuses to go and assures Wentworth she's only been there twice and he half-smiles politely. louisa came running up to take Wentworth wherever and he like turned around to look at Mary and Anne and Anne fkn spun around to avoid him just generally so smooth these two so smooth. Anne's looking around at like anything and everything except him. every time he's nearby she tenses up and skitters around like she's tryna hide in plain sight but also stand tall and brave and staring straight at him like she wants him to look at her so badly. 'we all wish that charles had married anne instead' 'did charles want to marry anne' 'did you not know' 'you mean she refused him' 'yes' ... 'my parents think it was Lady Russell's doing, that my brother not being philosophical enough for her taste she persuaded Anne to refuse him.' ohhhhhh. damn. Wentworth is very quiet. Mouth tight. Brow low. Anne's freaking out down the hill. Mary's just stolen her spot. Christ. It's chaos. Anne's stumbling along she's tired she's sad she's got the depression her sister's a nightmare, WEntworth doesn't care about her, she cares about him, everything is awful and she trips over some sticks and he turned to look at her, concerned out of his thoughts. Hey petunias back with her carriage and they're offering a seat and Wentworth like rushes over and whispers for them to take Anne and she catches it like wtf confusion she goes to protest and suddenly He's AT her SIDE and he doesn't even say anything and he leans his head down to hers for a moment with a gentle look on his face, putting a hand to her back and her brain just shuts down as he leads her to the carriage and hold her hip tight as he helps her up and she looks around in shock and he's staring straight forward like everything is chill and doesn't look at her again. oh wait petunia is wentworth's sister damn awesome but she doesn't think very well of him. oh they're going to Lime and they ask if Anne can come and I think Wentworth choked on his tea a little bit. and here's some establishing shots : the ocean. Some rocks with seaweed on them. The shittest 'beach' ive ever seen there's like boulders everywhere where's the sand? is that a teepee of seaweed? what Wentworth looks pretty happy about it though like he wants to jump in. I like Charles he's a funny dude. Wow that is one helluva hat Wentworth. All these fancy people going into a sailor's home like etiquette is what but everyone is chill with it except Mary of course. is Anne supposed to have her bonnet off? o no now she's chosen to be the nice depressed girl who tries to talk to the weird depressed guy who is too into poetry about death. cute they're all shoulder to shoulder around the guy's table. she starts getting the hint that this guys a bit off 'you cannot know the depths of my despair.' damn son get a therapist. ohh shittt 'you have no conception of what i have lost' 'yes I have' she says, and Wentworth is sitting there smoking what could be a blunt who can honestly say and he heard the whole thing. Wentworth and Louisa are doing a whole lot of hanging out.  Like every time they actually speak to each other feels like a momentous occasion - they literally just said 'good morning' to each other and it feels like such a big step and her heads down and he's watching her BIG STEPS --oh shit some blonde haired guy that im sure will come up later tipped his hat to the girls and then Anne and Wentworth was coming up behind her and she looked over her shoulder to look at the BLondie but wentworth thought it was at him and he SMILED to himself nawwww. that looks like the house from Pride and Prejudice ahaha. whoop Blondie's back and she looked back at him again and now they're at breakfast ohmyGadh his eyes sparkle when he looks at her the few times he looks at her my god they're talking about Blondie who is apparently their cousin or something and he and mary and anne's father aren't on good terms and she tells Mary so and he looks over his bowl with those fkn sparklllinggg eyes and a playful smile and it doesn't even matter what he says just that look and he drinks his soup and licks his lips and looks up at her and she's just staring but like calmly not even freaking out and she lowers her eyes to her toast and just chills like all is well.  whoop i think weird depressed guy is gonna propose but before he can whats up we're helping girls down some scary stairs yikes i'd sit my ass down going down those things. Louisa is being crazy oh fuckkkk ahahaha hahaSPLAT holy shit oh fuck weird depressed guy is standing in the background with his hands over his mouth Anne is in there with Charles and Wentworth damn she'd 100% be a doctor nowadays, Louisa the dumbass has smashed herself on the cobblestones and WEntworht is just freaking out and he is looking straight to Anne who is giving straight smart orders and he is following them without hesitation - the other women are crying they're all sitting around her while the doctor does like... something and Anne's the only one like hey we have shit to do like people gotta hear about this we don't have phones and her speaking makes Wentworth speak and Charles is in shock cause its his baby sister whose hurt. Once again she's looking after the injured person and she walks out and Wentworth is talking to Charles 'I think it should be Anne - no one so capable as Anne--' he cuts off when he sees her coming in 'I-we-you'll stay, won't you?' he stammers as she enters holy fuck my heart can't handle...they're just staring into each others eyes; in any other context man. he clarifies himself but fuck if they didn't think it. ah fuck Mary is so annoying crying that she should be the one to stay with Louisa like bitch you didn't even give a shit about your injured son let alone your sister-in-law wtf she needs a slap why are they listening to her. 'If only I -- if only--' he cries in the carriage 'yes.' Anne said, looking at him sadly. 'Anne... I regret that...' he looks at her once and again and again and she lowers her eyes and holds the sleeping Henrietta close. like honestly i feel like there's no problem writing their dialogue cause there is just so little of it and when it does happen all of it means everything. but anyway she doesn't answer him and I am sad and he is sad. 'damned foolish' he sa---wait holy shit SCREAAAAAAAMINGgGg fucking hell grab your torches and pitchforks Mrs Mudahwhatver is screaming and Wentworth is riding off in the rain and once again Anne is all alone and she stays up just walking around all night and playing the piano and yay Louisa is conscious and Anne continues to be depressed poor girl and you can tell because its raining. and its still raining and they're not back-- wait now she's in Bath and her fop father and bitch sister are lounging irritatingly and he says he's happy for her to have come because it will be an advantage to have four at dinner. things are white and gold - clean and unhomely and too perfect and the fop is calling everyone ugly - they're eating sorbet again ahaha yum. god they all look bored and miserable and here's blondie come to greet them and he glances at Anne, processes and then snaps back to stare at her in astonishment he's got nice hair and he continues to stare damn and she's so confident she just smiles and stares back I'm so jealous she can do that. oh mygod they're having an intimate conversation in front of her shitty family dude i know he'll probs turn out like a wickham character but one can have hope. damn that jaw-line tho. hmmm lady russell is back. i hate her hair. metal cups are odd - they make sense but so strange. Russell's got plans man Anne's telling her about how her bitch sister is after Blondie and Russell laughs and pats her cheek. Oh yay it's petunia! aw she hears the admiral is in poor health and she's immediately like what's wrong here come get some water. damn bitch sister 'she is nothing to me' damn whats about the screaming and the random rage bursts damn. oh and here's a viscountess why are they always fucked. Blondie and Anne are in the corner flirting crazily I know he's bad but like you can't fake this chemistry no one's that good. and suddenly she's surprised?0oh my god that suit. Mrs Smith oh my god she's adorable she and Nurse Rook are gossipers hell yeah 'there are no secrets in Bath' naw this better not be a Helen situation come on guys - oh fuck Louisa is gonna marry weird depressed guy?? and Anne is freaking thrilled. damn it rains a lot here. far out hats are crazy. Here's Blondie. Anne's so used to being verbally abused by her sister she doesn't respond -----holy damn its Wentworth walking down the street. Penelope is n---- oh fuck he just walked in -- she took a breath with her back to him then spun around HOWDY he looks shocked and delighted and she hse ewihpewjihp oh my god they love each other and they're so nervous and uncertain about it oh my god so awkward and cute please trying to go through the etiquette script oh no so cute 'im already armed for Bath' he grins and she laughs ----oh no. ... oh shit. Blondie just showed up and she just accepted Wentworth's umbrella everything was going so well stop awwww nooo his face falls, her face falls everything is awful. standing all solemn and glum by the window and all dressed in white looking shiny and gorgeous her little sack bag is weird but. and who is she looking for, I wonder. The family is standing awkward---there he be. tall and commanding and hmhmmm i love a man in uniform - she steps in front of him as he tries to pass him by. asks him if he's come for the concert - 'no ive come for a lecture on navigation am i in the wrong place' damn son no he's so good at making her laugh she never laughs oohh her family have to bow to him interesting - he's asking her how she's been since Lime I love them talking he starts on about being concerned about weird depressed guy getting married to Louisa because of his depression about his dead fiance 'a man does not recover to such a devotion to such a woman - he ought not; he does not' i'm sorry was that a declaration of love m8 omg Anne knows it too 'i should like to see it again' 'would you i would've thought i mean the distress, too painful' 'but when the pain is over...' dudes DUDES guys please guys 'It was my doing solely mine - Louisa would not have been obstinate if i had not been weak - Anne, I have never--' GUYS NO the fucking viscountess wandered in ruining everything and now he's gone please come back who cares about this lady singing i mean the candles look cool and but stop honestly who cares bring back Wentworth. omg fop is asleep, Anne and Blondie are bantering and she's not realising that she's pushing into flirting, again my god silly silly innocent naive and entirely relatable lol help. but there's Wentworth standing all tall and handsome in the corner and he looks so sad and meanwhile Blondie is like tryna propose and Wentworth is tryna yeet outta there and she's sprinting over to him tryna block his way tryna convince him to stay HOW THE TURN TABLES 'the next song is beautiful its a very beautiful love song is that not worth your staying for.' 'there's nothing worth my staying for.' kill me. Blondie needs to like there's no way he couldn't tell.  Yay Charles is here! oh and Mary lol. Lol everyone is making decisions on what Louisa and Henrietta are gonna wear on their wedding day except they themselves?? And here is ol mate sweeping int eh room, smile briefly falling at the sight of Anne but everyone's happy to see them yay. mate what he just swept over to her talking softly ohmhwy god i don't think they've said anything directly to each other in their lives its all round the bend and metaphors and insinuations please kill me i love it he picks at her that she says she doesn't like the parties her family and Blondie give; 'they mean nothing to me'  she has nothing in common with them and dislikes how they are, they're smiling at each other - oh shit Mr Elliott is out there meeting with her sister's friend or whatever now fkn Russell's tryna PERSUADE (ahaha) her into marrying Elliot 'that is not what I want!' Russell is shocked. now he's here looking stiff and snappy and awkward because the admiral has told him to invite her and her newly engaged Mr Elliot to his house and oh my god poor ol mate he wants to yeet away into the sunset goodbye world fuck you all 'if you wish it all you have to do is give me a yes or a no and we are both released' 'the admiral is too kind...' 'just say it: yes or no.' fuck you jane austen. Anne is overwhelmed and stormed off Russell faces Wentworth, he sneers her name, she smiles serenely 'You have an extraordinary ability to discompose my friend sir' , he twitches ' you have an extraordinary ability to influence her ma'am for which I find it hard to forgive you.' damn and then the scene ends damn.  she's run off to Mrs Smith and Nook I love em she's ranting about everyone thinking she's gonna marry this guy and they're astonished and relieved cause he is poor and living on loans - he wants her for her money, title and lands thank god she's got her friends eyyy yasss. naw petunia and mrs musgrove are here my favs. Wentworth is writing a letter. whever they're in the room she can't help but look at him. she's talking with weird depressed gyu's fiance's brother - he's bitter that he's moved on so fast - she wouldn't have, its not in her nature, 'it would not be in the nature of any woman who truly loved.' 'do you claim that for your sex?' 'we do not forget you as soon as you forget us.' blah blah about women being stuck at home because people were shit to us back then fuck the patriarchy and all that. Fiance's brother says women and men are the same in being inconstant and forgetting those they love or have loved. Their convo gets interrupted by Wentworth knocking the whatever it is that they sprinkle over ink to dry it off the table and everyone's like dude the fuck we don't own vacuum cleaners you know. Fiance's brother says he's not read a book in his life that didn't have something to say on women's fickleness. 'but they were all written by men.' she argues. they laugh.  he's on about going off to sea and being the victim cause he has to leave his family behind and boohoo it's so hard for me to be away from them even though i'm the one choosing to go away. yikes too close to home. anyway lolol. She says that above all, women are the ones who love the longest when all hope is gone. they all left, he snuck back and put out a letter on the desk, gave her a look and then left. she pretty much threw herself at it OH MY GOD THE LETTTTTTTTERRRRRRRR dudes dudes dudes dudes deud ed dud oh ymf theihwhes 'where are you going' 'i hardly know' ihowyiqruhoijpfg0hurbj3ifjpgrn Charles just keeps on standing between them and chattering finally gets it tips his hat and trots off wringing his hands. those eyes - he offers a hand, he takes it - i tried to forget you, i thought i had. they kiss very slowly, very gently, very chastely. his hair all windswept like that is very becoming - the way she slowly ran her hands over his arm before tucking it into his --- aand now there is a very random festival procession what and they're walking down the empty street. okay cool fine. she wanders into the gaming room or whatever, the camera mans shadow spreading all over the place, her sister grabs her and tells her not to monopolise wentworth - there's another war coming? oh how romantic. 'MY PROPOSAL OF MARRIAGE TO YOUR DAUGHTER ANNE HAS BEEN ACCEPTED.’ he fucking beams. everyones shocked. 'Anne? You want to marry anne, whatever for?' he just grins at the fop. And now she's on a ship and they're sailing off to war, oh how romantic. and there you go.

--

ya know before this 1-3am viewing i wouldve given this a 4/5 or even 4.5/5, but now I’m gonna give it a 3/5. there’s just something about it thats a bit... idk. still really like it but also.. yeah.

[lonecypressworkshop-blog]

PUNT! Kick the can down the proverbial endless political road. What an utter waste of time. STOP kicking. START fixing. What is wrong with these people anyway? No Integrity. No Character. No Courage. No Backbone whatsoever. No Resolve. No clue at all what needs to be done, or what to do about it. How discouraging. How disappointing. How Tragic. How SAD! The well-known warning reverberates throughout our media. The NEXT election is to be the most important election in our lifetimes! Our country stands at a fundamental turning point in our country's very existence! Energize the bases. Man the ramparts. Prepare for BATTLE! What a waste of our resources. What a waste of time. I am tired of hearing the same vapid slogans, experiencing the same never-ending hatred, and enduring the same inevitable failures. Oh, there will be winners and losers, but the reality is that in the end, we will ALL be losers. None of this will result in any benefits or any progress. There will be no solutions. It is undeniable that many will become rich or famous over the next few months, or rich and infamous as the case may be. And the power they obtain will be visibly intoxicating, but there will be no euphoria for the common man. There will be no sense of accomplishment in the aftermath. Our citizens will be that much POORER for the exercise in futility. THEY will receive nothing of value from yet another encounter in the slow dissolution of our endangered political system. Any sense of success will quickly be replaced with the familiar feelings of frustration and confusion. The impotency will return. And our reliable companion, HATRED, will again take its rightful place at the head of all of our discourse as we prepare for the next engagement, the next protest, and the next election, already gaining momentum based on the results just achieved, by a team declaring victory. It doesn't really matter which side wins. There is no real victory. There WILL be ramifications. The only real losers? That would be WE THE PEOPLE. I cringe at the expectation of hearing, even more, Rosie O'Donnell or Maxine Waters and their hysterical rantings. I fail to see the value of presenting these people to our citizens as a part of our political dialogue. Do these individuals represent your viewpoint? Do you really wish them to be your voice, your champion? If so, I feel a deep sense of pity and sympathy for you. I Personally long for the appearance of someone of considered thought. A person who is both informed and objective. An individual who is both capable of asking and responding to insightful questions without the desire to hate and the ability to refrain from being petulant and easily offended. When is the last time you saw someone such as this? When have you ever even heard of one in passing? Is there one of these people in our entire system of politics? It is obvious there is no such thing within our Fourth Estate. Our protesters? Our Entertainment and Sports celebrities? Our advocacy groups? Our talking heads? If they exist, they are our country's best-kept secret. Does Reason and Intelligence and Integrity even exist anymore? If so, then where does it reside? And even if we found them, who would listen? Would you? They exist. I know they do. But they live in deathly fear. They cower in dark corners and lonely rooms. It is the rare individual that is willing to suffer ridicule and disrespect for asking a simple question. Offering life and limb in search of undeniable truth. To sacrifice reputation and livelihood to help and support the very people that crucify them? They may be cowards and they may fear, but not the unknown, but the known and inevitable. It is understandable. What cannot be understood is the freedom that the rest of us allow these voices of hatred and tyranny to the exclusion of those critical thinkers that are our only hope for the future, and mankind's true destiny. It does not feel like that is true at times, but I still believe that with a passion. Man is meant to be so much more than what we see every day. I question my own passion and those same beliefs every minute of every day. Maybe Man is nothing more than the animal from whence we evolved, living in the dirt around us and tearing at the flesh of those that we can enslave, through control of mind or body. But I remain hopeful. With faith, if you will. Not in the existence of any God, but in the ability of man to someday rise above the swamp by his strength of character and the purity of thought and philosophy. At one time I believed I would see the progress of this in my lifetime. Now I simply hope it is something more than a dream. There is NO challenge that we cannot confront and resolve. Nothing. But it will take more than we are willing to offer one another as we squabble among ourselves about issues that are so petty and ignorant as to make us appear as children. I've said it a hundred times. I will say it a hundred more. Everything you wish for. Everything I wish for. Will NEVER happen until we decide to have that CONVERSATION I speak of ad nauseam. You know there is truth in my words. Until we sit down and talk, and listen, there will be no change, there will be no peace. The issues are ironically irrelevant. Our shooters in the schools, or justice on our streets. Tolerance for those that do not think as we do. Equality for everyone. Empathy and Compassion for those that can not cope with their challenges. We need to talk. We need to Debate. We need to exercise CONTEMPLATION of all the words and all the ideas. We need to discuss the differences and reflect on the possibilities. Never stop thinking, Never stop looking for workable options. And in the end, it is imperative that we achieve a level of COMPREHENSION and put the understanding into concrete actions and strategies. Well, that about covers it. Our Shooters are not going away anytime soon. Can we fix them? I am confident we can. Will we? Of that, I am somewhat ambivalent. Time will tell. Our other issues? I would have to say ditto. I may not have THE answer, but I do have AN answer. I cannot force anyone to agree. Even if I could my Philosophy will not let me. But I WILL try to convince, and will continue to do so with my dying breath. That's who I am. It's what I have decided to do. I know the frustrations I will endure. I know what my tomorrows will bring, to some degree, and if Tomorrow ever comes. But the question is not about me. I am a somewhat known commodity. The question is more about YOU. What are YOU going to do? And when are YOU going to DO IT?