#and october and November just sucked and this loneliness is killing me and I'm working a job i don't like and i miss my siblings | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dogearedheart · 5 days ago

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As someone who has been struggling with loneliness and being on their own, I do sometimes wonder if there is something fundamentally wrong with me. Because no matter where I go, I always feel like I have to pretend to a certain degree, that I'm trying to play a role. It's so alienating. Like, I do think I manage to get along with most people, but they don't see me/care to do so, and it's...frustrating. I never really had friends when I was a kid or teenager. I don't have any now and it's so fucking hard not to feel this loneliness. Knowing that you are living one of your biggest fears and all that bullshit. And I wonder... maybe it's always been me.

#and sometimes i wonder if people can smell it on me #this desperation to be needed and someone people want around #and i think about how fucked up my brain is #and that maybe i won't ever be fortunate enough to be seen again #and I've been alone for years and i did meet people but it never seems to work because i get too into my head it fuck it up #and october and November just sucked and this loneliness is killing me and I'm working a job i don't like and i miss my siblings #and i want to go home to a place that doesn't even feel like home anymore #but i also want to leave and i am just so tired #i just need a little peace #sorry...#i hope it's okay I'm sharing this stuff #if not let me know :)#personal #txt.

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