#and now we're both sad
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beanghostprincess · 1 year ago
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The heartbreaking thing about Yamace isn't really Yamato not being able to do anything about Ace's death, helpless and on his knees, and realizing he couldn't be free yet. Or Ace dying realizing he wasn't able to keep his promise. But the fact that it was the first time Yamato had ever felt real love and he will never be able to feel that again, his love for Ace remaining still forever because everything stopped that day for them. Ace gave him the gift of feeling so much love in one single night and Yamato spent years without being able to do anything with it.
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sainz100 · 2 months ago
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📸 by Martin Trenkler
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constance-dartagnan · 3 months ago
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the thing about birthday depression is that birthdays are. fundamentally. the #1 day to be happy that you're alive. Which is hard to do yourself if you're not actually happy to be alive and also the people around you can't win because if they forget (or don't acknowledge it) that feels like evidence that nobody else is happy you're alive either but if they DO try to celebrate it makes you feel guilty for not matching the vibe
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hellomagicalsouls · 11 months ago
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i had a dream about Klaus and Five fighting then five brought up Klaus being a junkie and thennnnn
Klaus brought up how Five is the reason every bad thing has happened to him. five LITERALLY did it to himself.
nobody pushed him out the door to go attempt to jump into the future infact everyone tried to stop him because they called after him.
five literally made his life the way it is because he's a stubborn bitch who thought he knew better
i woke up @ 4am after this dream and haven't slept since
also he called Klaus a junkie who has no idea what it's like being alone but Klaus literally was on the streets for like 12 years so he probably understands better than anyone
cause five and Klaus both probably had no food and had to eat out of dumpsters and do things they absolutely didn't want to do in order to survive
dream verse has it out for me honestly
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eepy-samzie · 9 months ago
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ok, so with this new app releasing in NB.. i've been thinking abt it and had a sort of scary thought
we know how og is slowly but surely declining?? no otaku camps, no exchange, less rewards in ur cards, cuz most of the goodies are in NB.. i actually think this new app might be a full collection of og om's story + event stories for those who completed them. basically finally giving them an excuse to shut down og completely.
what do you guys think the app might be? id be happy to be proven wrong tbh
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turnedpalefromlackofsun · 5 days ago
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i wrote a fanfic
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arctic-hands · 8 months ago
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No for real tho re: my last tags on that being traumatized by your parents post. my parents are my role models when it comes to a hypothetical future where I have a child, in that I'll take everything they did, showed me, and taught me and do the complete opposite. Like I'm not going to pretend that I'll be perfect and I know it'll be stressful and no matter how careful I am i will inevitably make mistakes, but like I'm committed to not screaming at my child every time they knock something over or drop or spill or even break something. I need it ingrained in my mind if it ever happens that my first priority is to make sure the kid didn't get hurt and then after making sure they're okay, teach my child how to clean up the mess. That's infinitely more of a grace that I was ever shown growing up where I was screamed at the very second I clumsily dropped or knocked over something, unable to take a breath to steady myself bc my mother would be screaming at me if I didn't clean it at lighting speed the very moment it happened. Like is a slightly stained carpet worth all that terror?
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justafriendofxanders · 10 months ago
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the real star-crossed lovers of btvs are xander and spike, because xander would have been dtf most days if a flimsy enough heterosexual excuse provided itself, except for that one time when he was going after spike for sleeping with anya. unfortunately for him, that is probably also the only time spike would have been down to smash.
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sysig · 1 month ago
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Physical media is forever (Patreon)
#Doodles#Helix#Max Vyer#Dexter Favin#Vent#I'm trying to remember the last time I made a fandom vent rather than my sona.... Probably Vargas-something#*continues to project onto Max* He really is just like me fr#Probably pretty obvious what this is in reference to - turned a bit more malicious and intentional here#Something something it's easier to be angry at a source of intention than to be sad about coincidental bad luck#I'm not about to be thankful for a bad thing happening but the fallout thereof Is interesting in its own right#Like how this probably wouldn't have crossed my mind elsewise - nor would I have started and finished it all in one big sprint#Not much else I could do except get some of the feelings Out#Ft. some of the thoughts I had - self arguments to try to minimize(?) the hurt#Especially of just recreating it since so much of it was my thoughts - Max's dreams are just his subconscious right? Haha#But when you build something over the course of years there's these subtle builds that divorce Then from Now#Not to mention whatever stimuli at the time - if Max's life coincided with specific dreams and both are never repeated#One thing that I think about a lot - ironically haha - is that you only get to experience A Thing for the first time Once#You are then forever changed even if just in some small way - an action that can never be unactioned#Even otherwise recreating the perfect set of circumstances just won't produce the same outcome#It all threads into my thoughts on Legacy as well - if what we leave behind ceases to be - if our butterfly wings are blown out#It could happen at any point - posthumously or while we're still here - and how much does that change in the long run?#It's an interestingly depressing thought haha#It's also part of why I double down on art so so so much - a language that cuts to the core of me#Every picture worth 1000 words - hopefully enough to make up for however many lost (I did a rough estimate and it would've been ~380k)#Somewhere in there are the feelings that lost their voice - were big and loud enough to immortalize in graphite on paper#Scanned and uploaded and maybe even downloaded elsewhere in the world - preserved fourfold in a way a single file on a single computer isn't#Even if one is destroyed it's somewhere else; the danger of only having one copy a kind of trust in program or physicality but no guarantee#Thoughts and thoughts and thoughts - also part of why I tag to tag limit so often I want them saved somewhere outside myself#Seems silly to talk about the art too but I have thoughts there as well haha - like of Madame Vyer asking for Dex's lighter#Dex holding Max back - to protect him from the damage while forcing him to confront it cruelty cruelty
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cractasticdispatches · 3 months ago
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Blorbo Poll
Rules: make a poll with five of your all-time favourite characters and then tag five people to do the same. See which character is everyone's favourite.
tagged by: @im-not-a-monster
EDT: ah shit we forgot to tag ppl like a dumbass. uh..... you. you reading this right now (if u want to anyway)
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widevibratobitch · 9 months ago
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something about being told im 'the leading person at this whole academy when it comes to interpretation and stage intelligence' by the husband of the woman im trying (not really. but i mean. who knows) to seduce... ok boy you got me. lets make it a polycule.
#im playing it all cool and funny now but atm i legit burst into tears lol#like he said i have a 'good voice too of course' but i know realistically that is not my strongest asset#and even if i were technically perfect. which im NOT lol. the voice itself is just nothing special. it's there ig but that's about it#but its nice to know i may not be 100% useless after all#(just 90%)#also apparently the most feared and respected professor who came to the concert said. again. that he likes me the most.#which again. crying real actual tears about this all rn this means literally the world to me this is everything i have#and i have no one to share this with because im not gonna say it to my uni friend cause i dont want her to feel like im boasting or sth#(even tho she has no such qualms herself but probably because i know how. not great. it feels when someone keeps talking about themselves#and about how great they are and how easy everything is for them. i dont wanna do it back at her.#well there's also the fact that i dont think im great and this is not fucking easy to me at all lol#but idk i think the difference between us is that she actually admitted she sees no point in singing if she cant show off (thus she hates#the duet we're singing because she sings the lower part and cant show off her high notes or coloratura.#which is like. an insane take to me. i mean it i get it. kinda. if i had a voice like hers maybe id be like that too fuck knows.#but that just feels so. idk. sad to me. so self obsessed and empty. like you dont care about the music itself? about you being a part of it?#also immediately made singing with her not fun anymore. i thought we were creating something TOGETHER. but thanks for the confirmation#that you only really care about being 'better than'. yikes.#like idk this behaviour is funny and iconic in old school opera legends like yes go bite each others dicks off.#but it hits completely different when it's your own colleague let alone your friend. like damn girl. damn)#) anyway. the husband is kinda hot too now that i think of it. i really should seduce them both.#except its realistically not possible since they've both seen me cry now (she saw it like a hundred times lol)#so ive lost the hot and mysterious card alas. no uni professors romance for me
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3416 · 1 year ago
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getting the mitch marner sads is the worst feeling in the world btw
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natjennie · 9 months ago
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does anyone out here have a dad that isnt an asshole all the fucking time. like is it even possible.
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doctorweebmd · 19 days ago
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accidentally* brainstormed a very complete outline for chapters 4-8 for eih, which should theoretically take us through Part 1. which is. you know. a godsend or whatever.
*accidentally meaning i was just eating delicious pancakes and the thoughts happened. usually its me crying screaming and shitting myself in front of an empty word document where ideas manifest. this is notably much more pleasant.
#that alone makes this weekend a good one#i also bought (leased) a new car yesterday!!!#which is exciting for me because i've been driving my first car for 16 years#even though its a base model its still SO much more advanced#hello how did i live without a backup camera of this long#also like. carplay. and auto windshield wipers. and keyless entry/start. and adjustable steering wheel#AND its electric! kinda. (a plug-in hybrid so has both engines but can run on only electric)#i've finally joined the 21st century#although tbh i thought my first car of my adult life may be something bougie. a BMW or some shit#alas i grew up to be too practical. so i bought a prius. because of course.#listen i live in california and wanted to go electric for forever#alas elon shat the bed by being elon so a tesla was an absolute no go#its funny like... you know that most of your customers for these cars were well-off environment-conscious liberals right#i've seen a tesla with a bumper that says 'i bought this before i knew elon was crazy'#which. like. yeah. fair#other fun events from last week. there was a fire super close to our house and we were in the evacuation zone#which is like. wow. i know its been dry and windy but i never thought it would actually happen HERE#everything is okay and we're safe and it was put out really fast#but definitely gave us a pause and made us think about whats important (our cat. everything else is replaceable.)#but another reason this weekend is good: it RAINED. last night and today.#listen i've been... extremely extremely extremely sad the past week#because of everything. because of 'allowance' of ice agents hospitals and thinking about what i would do and risk because FUCK THEM#suffering isn't moral and doesn't help anyone. just trying to find a way to help my community#and three nice things happening AND just hearing the border fire is under control...#its going to be okay. it really is.#anyway this post is about FANFICTIOn#fun fact i started looking into numerology that has to do with ying-yang#which is helping me decide on how many chapters per 'part'#its clever and unnecessary but makes me happy so whatever#chapter 4 of eih is ~2k works now as a mostly-outline
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girlivealwaysbean · 4 months ago
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so sad for absolutely no reason
#👆 girl who stayed up till 3 am talking to her bestfriend about how depressed and trapped we both are for about 4 hrs#it's like that gracie lyric#you have to laugh before you start to cry😭😭#like ab toh funny bhi nahi lag raha jokes bhi nahi banaye ja rahe#oh but i love her so much i absolutely LOVE people with whom i can just be sad#im tired of people who constantly try to make the sadness go away or try to cheer me up#like sometimes you just gotta sit with your feelings na#at one point she was ranting and i said mere paas kuch kehne ke liye bhi nahi hai kyunki it literally feels like im listening#to my own thoughts on my own lying in bed at 2 am like hum itna same kaise sochte hai😭#and she laughed and was like but ye sahi hai na aise sochna like it feels wrong but it's the truth and im like i don't even#know but oh it's so good to not pretend to be okay#we're so similarly hopeless and tired cause like one point mein inevitably we talked about#the future living together our apartment and then i was like mujhe bhi ye chahiye but mujhe itni umeed uth chuki hai life se#ki koi excitement bhi nahi aa rahi like i already know ye sab kuch nahi hone wala and she's like haina same like i want to say#ki we'll do this and that but im like lol not gonna happen ab i can't look forward to things in the future im like if im living it then ok#then i can accept ki oh ok this is really happening im happy now wow but usse pehle nope#and we were talking about ki like yaar future toh ab dikhta hi nahi hai kya hoga it all feels so blurry and like a dark tunnel#atleast bachpan se we knew what was next school college but now it's like now what?#i know all these thoughts and feelings are pretty common and probably everyone's facing this but bhai.#it's fucking hard i didn't know life was gonna be like a constant battle where it kicks you down#again and again and again and you're bloody and no energy can't get up but you still have to because if you don't you'll sink#soooo deep in that state ki bahar nikal hi nahi paoge#OKAY 8 hrs sleep mandatory for me what the fuck why am i writing a ventpost at freaking 11 am girl go have lunch or something 😭
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majiburger · 1 month ago
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just saw a reel where this woman was complaining that when jeff bezos and elon musk became billionaires, they were praised for their hard work but when taylor swift and beyonce did it they were accused of selling their souls, and i'm trying not to be mean, but it is really amusing that women in most states of america do not even have basic civil rights (like the right to an abortion) but are spending most of their time defending a billionaire's right to brag about how much money they have, like girl what about YOUR money? what about YOUR civil rights? how is them being lauded for their wealth going to do anything for you?
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