#and now he's yejun

[kyuala]

WAIT real quick just before i start i want to say what i think their personalities will be like just to keep this here for future reference to see how much that perception will change

[soov-archived]

i switched up from laughing out loud ‘cause of some random joke i thought about to crying over gaku in SECONDS

[writingforstraykids]

Always back to you - Chp.5

Pairing: single!dad!Minho x male!Reader (Chanlix | OT8

Word Count: 6696

Summary: Just as everything seems to go well a call from the past messes with Minho's mind. His ex is set on getting her son back, ready to destroy everything you've built.

Warnings/Tags: fluff, angst, date night, yejun's a bitch

A/N: Thank you for all the love so far for little Minjun and his family🤭🖤

PART FOUR | PART SIX

Minho stretches his tired body, glancing over at you in the corner of the room. You're currently taking some calls to sort out Chan's upcoming schedules, and he can't bite back a small smile while watching you. After your fight, Chan made you stay by making you responsible for his own schedule and wanting to keep you around. 

They're taking a short break from practice, and Minho is glad to rest his body for a bit. He glances around the room and frowns as he can't find Minjun and his current assistant. “Y/nnie?” he asks gently as you end your call. “Where's our boy?”

“O-Our-,” you stammer, eyes widening at him. 

The silence that follows is loud. Around the room, heads turn, the abrupt outburst of movement marking a collective interest in the unfolding drama, or rather, the slip of the tongue that Minho just let loose. The members, more or less familiar with the private dynamics slowly simmering between you and Minho, can hardly contain their amusement.

"Did Minho just say 'our boy'?" Jisung repeats, his voice teasing as he nudges Chan with his elbow, a knowing grin spreading across his face.

Chan doesn’t miss a beat. “Yeah, Minho, since when did Y/nnie and you start sharing custody?” he chimes in, laughter tinting his voice as he looks over at you both, his eyes gleaming with mischief.

Minho, usually so composed, feels a warm flush spreading up his neck, coloring his cheeks as he meets your startled gaze. He hadn’t even realized what he'd said until it was echoed back to him, and now, caught in the playful teasing of his friends, he finds himself grappling for a response.

"I just meant—" Minho starts, trying to backpedal, but Felix cuts him off, practically bouncing in his seat with delight.

"Aww, look at him! He’s embarrassed! Minho hyung, it’s cute, really. Embrace the family vibes!" Felix teases, his voice light and teasing.

You, still slightly flustered by Minho’s unexpected inclusivity, try to regain your composure. "Minjun is just with Hyejin," you manage to say, redirecting the conversation to the young boy's whereabouts. They went somewhere else to play. He should be nearby."

Yet, the teasing doesn’t stop there. Throughout the rest of the break, the members throw in casual jokes about family planning and shared parenting. Their banter is light but pointed, a humorous acknowledgment of the evolving relationship dynamics within their circle.

As the laughter and jokes continue, Minho finds himself looking over at you, and something about your shy smile, the way you're trying to hide your own amusement, settles the warmth in him more firmly. It's a reassurance, a silent acknowledgment that maybe, just maybe, he didn’t misspeak after all.

As practice resumes and the members scatter back to their positions, Minho pulls you aside for a quick, private word, his expression earnest. "Hey, about earlier," he begins, his tone soft, apologetic. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. It just... came out."

You shake your head, dismissing his concern with a gentle smile. "It’s okay, Minho. Really, it was sweet," you assure him, your voice just as soft. "I guess it’s just a bit new to me, but not unwelcome."

Minho’s eyes search yours, looking for any sign of discomfort. Finding none, he allows himself a small, relieved smile. "It felt right," he admits. You already feel like family, you know?” 

The word 'family' hangs between you, a weighty yet comforting promise of what’s slowly knitting together. 

"Thank you, Minho," you reply, your heart light, warmed by the sincerity of the moment. "That means a lot to me. I'll go check on him, yeah?” 

“Yeah,” he nods, watching you leave. 

As soon as you leave, Changbin asks, “Do you know Minjun's new nickname for Y/nnie?” 

“Huh?” Minho frowns at him, grabbing his bottle of water. 

“He called him his new mum,” he laughs, and Minho's blush deepens. “He also said you're like Lix and Chan hyung.”

“Oh, you can't tell only half of the story,” Jisung protests. He added, “He said you're kissing like Chan and Lix.” 

Minho chokes on his water, tears shooting to his eyes as he coughs. Seungmin pats his back forcefully and starts laughing at him. “He what?” he wheezes, trying to catch his breath. 

“Yeah, he even showed Chan hyung that it's not on the cheek but on the lips,” Changbin snickers. 

Minho blushes furiously before dropping back onto the floor with a groan. “Well, he's not lying,” he says, and his friends start laughing. Minho inhales shakily, keeping his eyes on the floor. “I still don't know if it's a good idea. I don't want to pull him into the public aspect of my life. I'm also not quite sure if I'm what he needs,” he admits, and they all grow quiet again. “There's a lot of bullshit in the back of my mind about what happened with Yejun. I don't feel like I'm enough for Minjun either.”

“Does it feel right being with Y/nnie, though? If everything else wouldn't matter for a second…does it?” Felix asks gently. 

“It does,” he nods. 

“Maybe being with Y/n would help your insecurities regarding Minjun,” Hyunjin reminds him. 

“You wouldn't be the only parent he has then..sort of,” Jeongin agrees. 

Minho hums agreeingly and is about to answer when the door opens. He doesn't have to turn around to identify the small steps echoing on the floor. Minjun closes the distance between them and crawls into his lap, hiding his face in his shirt. Minho frowns and wraps his arms around him as he feels him tremble. “Baby, what's wrong?” he asks worriedly. 

“Hyejin is mean,” he sniffles. Chan looks up and frowns at Minho. 

“Mean?” he asks confused. “Did she say something bad?” Chan asks him gently. 

“She said shut up,” Minjun answers, looking at him with teary eyes. “I just showed her my drawing.”

Minho's heart sinks at how timid he sounds. He cuddles him close and kisses his head. “It's okay, baby. Do you want to show me instead?” he asks soothingly, and Minjun nods. 

“I'll handle it,” Chan promises and gets up quickly.

“Where's your drawing, mate?” Felix asks encouragingly, and Minjun gets up, wiping his cheeks with his sleeve. 

-

Chan leans against the wall in the elevator, watching you cautiously. You two just got back from handling the situation with Minho’s new assistant, who seems hopelessly overwhelmed by taking care of Minjun. “You love him, don't you?” he asks. 

“Minjun?” you ask. 

“No, Min,” he chuckles softly. You remain silent for a moment, almost squirming under Chan's observant gaze. “Do you love him?”

“Why?” you ask quietly. “Would that be an issue?”

Chan tilts his head at you. “As long as you don't hurt him, there's absolutely no issue. I'm just asking because he means a lot to us. Minjun does, too. Minho has been hurt very badly before, and I won't let that happen again.”

“I know; he's scared of getting hurt again,” you nod gently and fidget with your hands. “I do love him. Minjun and he mean a lot to me, and I have no intention of hurting either of them.”

“Okay,” Chan nods gently. “Minjun called you his new mum,” he smirked, and you bit back a laugh. 

“Sounds like him,” you giggle. “Really, Chan, I don't want to be a distraction or anything. I know that's probably easier with you and Felix, but-.”

Chan giggles softly and shakes his head. “Since we're both part of the group, every argument carries a certain risk. I think you being with them takes a lot off Minho's shoulders with Minjun.” He shoves his hands into his pockets and nods gently. “I'll be there if you need anything. I'd rather have you two get some help than get into another argument that lasts for weeks. He doesn't do well with conflict,” he laughs. 

“Me neither,” you laugh. 

“And you're sure you want to take over organizing both of our schedules? With Minjun?” he asks gently. 

“Oh, Minho's schedule can be done whenever he's available. Minjun doesn't feel like a job, and the older he gets, the less he'll be around the whole day,” you chuckle softly. “Also, let's not get ahead of ourselves; Minho and I haven't named our situation yet.”

Chan hums softly. “If it takes too long, let me know,” he smirks, leading you back to the practice room. 

Minjun is sitting on Felix's lap as you enter the room, his drawings spread out on the floor with the others inspecting them closely. He explains them in detail, amusing everyone present with his sweet way to do so. Minho watches him fondly, and looking at him you realize that this soft side of him made him stand out to you in the first place. Chan takes his place next to Felix, hand resting on his thigh naturally as he joins the discussion of Minjun's masterpiece. Minho reaches for your hand, pulling you into his lap and resting his head on your shoulder. You're a little surprised by the sudden display of affection here with the others, but the knowing smiles tell you that not only Chan knows. “What happened with Minjun?” he asks quietly. 

“Hyejin yelled at him. She didn't realize that being your assistant comes with taking care of Minjun properly. She had already refused to play with him, so he told her about his toys and drawings because he was bored, which annoyed her.

“Told you your replacement is shit,” he says quietly enough for only you to hear. 

“Idiot,” you chuckle fondly, smiling as he intertwines your hands. “Well, I'm officially your assistant again. I won't let anyone treat Minjun like that.”

Minho's hold on you tightens. “That's why I trust you with him.” You squeeze his hands lovingly, leaning back against him.

-

Minho giggles stupidly as he watches you stitch up the back of Leebit’s head. You've just spent a while trying to figure out a way to include some of his cologne in the plushie to make it smell like him for Minjun, much to his amusement. 

“You're so easily entertained sometimes,” you roll your eyes at him fondly. Minho circles the table, steps behind you, and wraps his arms around your waist. 

“You're amusing to watch sometimes,” he gives back, kissing your cheek. “But adorable.”

“Well, thanks. Not my fault your son is so attached to you,” you tease him gently, smiling as he runs his hands down your thighs, resting his head on your shoulder. 

“Hey, how is the sheer amount of love my son has for me my fault, huh?” he asks, gently squeezing your thighs. “It's not like I'd get what's so special,” he snorts. 

“You're his father, and compared to some other people we won't name here, you're actually there,” you say, and Minho bites back a laugh. You shake your head, focusing on the stitching, though the warmth of Minho's presence makes it hard to concentrate. "I think you underestimate your charm, Minho."

"I could say the same about you," he whispers back, his voice low and affectionate.

As you finish up with Leebit, Minho gently takes it from you, examining your work with an appreciative eye. "Perfect. He won't even notice the fix. You're amazing, Y/nnie."

The praise, sincere and simple, stirs something deep within you, and you find yourself turning to face him, his hands still circled around your waist. "I just don't want him to feel so alone whenever you're gone," you say.

Minho nods, his gaze softening. "You're so sweet. Don't you ever leave us, dear."

"Even when it gets complicated?" you ask, needing to hear his answer. You haven’t been this close to someone in ages, and you know Minho is a lot further than you in a few areas, but his prior hurt can’t be disregarded.

"Especially then," Minho affirms, his thumb tracing circles on your hip. "We're in this together, right?"

"Right," you agree, leaning in to kiss him—a sweet, affirming connection that promises more than words could.

-

The ring of Minho’s phone cuts through the quiet of his living room. Glancing at the caller ID, his stomach tightens uncomfortably; Yejun’s name flashes across the screen, bringing with it a cascade of unwelcome emotions.

He hesitates for a moment before picking up. “Yejun.”

“Minho,” her voice comes through, falsely cheerful. “I’ve been thinking a lot about Minjun. I want to take him to the U.S. with me for a while. Just a trip. It could be good for him.”

Minho’s grip on the phone tightens, his other hand balling into a fist at his side. Did she already forget the debacle from last time?  “Yejun, we’ve talked about this. Minjun doesn’t want that. Not without me.”

There’s a pause, and when she speaks again, her tone has cooled significantly. “You just don’t want to let me have him,” she says.

“That’s not it,” Minho replies, struggling to keep his voice even. “It’s about what he needs. And right now, he needs stability, something you walking in and out of his life doesn’t provide. Especially not after last time.”

Yejun’s laugh is sharp, biting. “Oh, now you’re the perfect father, huh? Wasn’t so perfect when we were married. Always away, always working. You were a shit husband, Minho.”

The words sting more than Minho likes to admit. He closes his eyes, taking a deep breath and reminding himself that his being away often hadn’t been the core issue. “I was not perfect,” he continues, the weight of their failed marriage always a tender wound. “And I am sorry for my part in what happened between us. But this isn’t about us, Yejun. It’s about Minjun.”

Silence stretches on the other end before Yejun’s voice cracks through, icy and menacing. “You’re keeping my son from me, Minho. You might fool everyone else with your doting father act, but I know the truth. I know who you really are.”

“You don't know shit, Yejun,” he says firmly. “You haven't been there for the past four years. Don't act like you know anything about me and my relationship with Minjun.”

“It doesn't matter if it's true or not if someone else believes me,” she says lowly. 

Minho feels a chill run down his spine. “Yejun, please. Let’s not do this. If you want to see Minjun, you can visit here and spend time with him where he’s comfortable. That’s fair, isn’t it?”

“Fair?” Yejun spits the word out like it tastes bitter. “You expect me just to accept scraps of time with my own son? You’ve turned him against me, Minho.”

“That’s not true. Minjun is old enough to know what he wants. And right now, he doesn’t want to go with you,” Minho insists, his voice firm. “He’s happy here, with his life here.”

There’s a venomous pause before Yejun’s voice lowers, a dark promise threading through her words. “You may have won this little round, Minho, but this isn’t over. I will have my son back. And I’ll destroy your life if I have to for taking him away from me. I’ll make you pay yourself stupid once I take him back in.”

“You chose to go away. You handed over full custody to me; technically, I could make sure you never see him again, which I don't because that's bullshit. But don't twist things,” Minho’s heart races with a mix of anger and fear—anger at her threats and fear of what she might be capable of. “Yejun, don’t do this. Don’t make threats. Let’s try to handle this like adults, for Minjun’s sake.”

Yejun’s laugh is cold, devoid of any real humor. “Oh, honey. This is just the beginning. I left because I had to, not because I wanted to. You made our life impossible. Remember that.”

With a click, she hangs up, leaving Minho staring at his phone, her words echoing in his head. He slumps back into the sofa, the weight of the call settling over him like a heavy blanket.

After a few moments of stunned silence, he stands, pacing the living room. The threat Yejun posed was not just to his tranquility but to Minjun’s well-being. He knew he couldn’t take her words lightly. Yejun was unpredictable, and if her past actions were any indication, she was capable of following through on her threats.

He needed to be proactive. First, he would need to talk to his legal team about securing his custody of Minjun, ensuring that Yejun couldn’t just take him without consent. Then, he would need to sit down with Minjun and prepare him, just in case Yejun tried to contact him directly.

By the time you arrive back home with Minjun, he is mentally exhausted but knows the day is far from over.

Minjun greets him with a smile and runs into his arms the moment he reaches him. “Daddy! I'm home!”

Minho hugs him tightly, lifting him up and spinning him around, Minjun’s laughter a balm to his frayed nerves. Setting him down, he kneels before him, looking into his son’s eyes. “Buddy, we need to talk about something important,” he begins, his voice soft but serious.

Minjun’s face sobers, sensing the gravity in his father’s tone. “Is everything okay, Daddy?”

“Everything’s going to be okay,” Minho reassures, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “We just have some things to sort out, you and I. But no matter what, we’re together in this. Okay?”

“Okay, Daddy,” Minjun nods, trust shining in his eyes.

As you sit down together, Minho’s heart swells with love for his son. No matter what Yejun threatened, he would protect Minjun and ensure his happiness. They were a team, and together, they could face anything - even this.

Minho fills you in quietly later as Minjun is playing on the carpet not far from you. Your heart sinks at her threats, and you almost feel sorry for her twisted view of what happened. That couldn't be healthy. 

-

Minho’s sleep is uneasy, his dreams filled with vague, unsettling images. He awakes with a start to the intrusive buzzing of his phone. He reaches out groggily, the glow from the screen harsh against the dim light of early morning. Blinking the sleep from his eyes, Minho’s gaze settles on a flood of notifications—missed calls, texts, and several urgent notifications from various news apps.

As he scrolls through them, a cold knot forms in his stomach. Each message seems to echo the same shocking revelation: “Yejun reveals Minho is dating his son’s babysitter!” and “Questions arise over Minho’s capabilities as a parent!” His heart pounds as he reads snippets of articles, each one painting him in an increasingly unfavorable light.

Beside him, you stir, your brow furrowing in sleep. Minho’s first instinct is to protect you from the storm that is about to break. He slips out of bed, his mind racing as he tries to process the information. How had things spiraled out of control so quickly? He knew Yejun was bitter about their past, but to go this far was something he hadn't anticipated.

He paces the room, his phone almost slipping from his sweaty palm as he tries to call Chan, his first person to turn to when his public life's falling apart. Chan had a way of handling these situations that made him feel safe. After several rings, a groggy voice answers.

“Min? It’s...what time is it?” Chan sounds disoriented, but he snaps to attention as soon as Minho begins to speak.

“I'm sorry for waking you, Channie hyung,” he says quietly, feeling a little guilty for disrupting his already fucked sleep schedule. 

Chan sits up at the timid sound of his voice. Minho doesn't call him ‘Channie hyung’ often; It's usually when he's feeling anxious or very thankful about something. He doubts it's the latter. “Minnie, what's wrong?” he asks gently, slipping out of bed to let Felix keep sleeping. 

“Channie, it’s all over the news. Yejun... she told them about Y/nnie and me. She said I can’t take care of Minjun properly. It’s a mess,” Minho’s voice is a mix of anger and desperation.

“What?!” Chan’s voice suddenly becomes sharp and angry. “She did what? Hold on, I’m checking this now.”

Silence fills the line for a few moments before Chan speaks again, his voice icy. “I see it. This is bullshit, Minho. She’s crossed a line. I’m calling the PR team. We need to handle this swiftly.”

“Thanks, hyung. I...I don’t know what to do,” Minho confesses, running a hand through his hair. His heart feels like it is being squeezed in his chest, the anxiety making it hard to breathe.

“Just stay put and try to keep calm. I’ll handle the media part. You just... make sure Y/nnie is okay. He's going to be dragged into this mess too,” Chan advises, his voice calm, but Minho can hear the underlying strain.

Minho nods, though Chan can’t see it. “Yeah, I’ll talk to him. Thanks, Channie, seriously.”

“Always, mate. We’re in this together,” Chan reassures him before hanging up.

-

Minho slipped out of the house quietly soon after, relieved that Minjun and you were still peacefully asleep. He needs to clear his head to handle everything calmly, and Chan will be busy for a while now. 

Minho steps into the practice room and stretches his tired body, warming up. He turns on the music a little more quietly than usual and closes his eyes, taking deep breaths as he prepares his body for the usual strain of dancing. 

He grabs his phone after a while and swallows hard. It isn't just the messages or missed calls—it's headlines, the kind that blur the lines between personal and public in the most invasive ways. “Stray Kids’ Minho’s Ex-Wife Claims Neglect—Says He’s Too Busy Dating Babysitter to Care for Son.” The words are crafted to scandalize, and they do their job perfectly.

The news is spreading fast, and with each passing minute, the narrative is slipping further from his control. Yejun had not only threatened him in private but also taken her grievances to the most public domain possible. The implications were catastrophic, affecting not just him but also Minjun and you, who had been nothing but supportive and loving towards both him and his son.

Minho gets lost in their newest choreo, moving his body precisely to the music, and tries to stop thinking about it for a while. Chan finds him there about an hour later, turning the music off as the song ends. “Thought I'd find you here.”

Minho pants softly and grabs the towel Chan holds out for him, wiping his face. “Needed to clear my head.”

The room is silent, heavy with unsaid words, until Chan finally speaks, his voice tight with anger and concern. “This is messed up, Min. She can’t just throw you to the wolves like this.”

Minho sighs, rubbing his temples. “I know, but she’s doing it anyway. She’s making it all public and dragging Y/n into it, too. It’s getting out of hand, and I’m worried about what this is doing to Minjun.”

Chan’s jaw clenches, and his protectiveness over his friend is evident. “We’ll fix this, okay? I talked to the PR team to see how we can counteract these claims. And I’m here, whatever you need.”

Minho looks up, startled as the door opens and Felix steps inside, followed by the rest of their closest friends. “Sorry, we're a little late.”

They all gather on the floor next to Minho and Chan, reassuringly patting his back as they do. “Let's deal with this bitch once and for all,” Jisung says firmly, feeling the need to protect little Minjun from this mess. 

“Is there anything we can do to help?” Seungmin asks, glancing at Chan questioningly. 

“Everyone of us will publish a statement; I already talked that through. Minho shouldn't have any issues proving he's the one worthy of custody in case she snaps and takes him to court. Hyunjin, Innie, you have an interview coming up; be prepared for dumb questions.”

“I'll make them look stupid instead,” Hyunjin grins, pulling a weak laugh from Minho. 

“Have you talked to your parents yet?” Jeongin asks Minho, who shakes his head. 

“I forgot about that,” he admits, already searching for his phone. 

“Might be a good idea to clear things up with them first,” Changbin agrees. 

“Whatever happens, we have your back,” Felix promises.

“Thank you guys, really. Just…if you find ways to ease Y/nnie with this, I'd be grateful. He's not exactly prepared for the public’s shit as we are.”

“Of course,” Chan assures him. “Now go call your parents.”

The support is reassuring, but the problem looms large and unyielding. As the day progresses, you come to find Minho, your expression fraught with worry. Seeing you so distressed adds another layer of guilt to Minho’s already heavy conscience.

“Hey,” he says softly as you hand over Minjun to Jisung, who leaves you some space. 

“Hey,” you echo, swallowing hard. “Minho, maybe I should just leave,” you suggest hesitantly, the words paining you even as they leave your lips. “If I’m not around, she won’t have another reason to attack you like this.”

Minho looks up sharply, his eyes locking with yours. “Y/n, no. Leaving won’t fix this. It’s not your presence that’s the problem—it’s Yejun. And I’m not going to let her chase you away. You mean too much to me, to Minjun.”

Your eyes fill with tears, touched by his words but still shaken by the rapid unraveling of your quiet life. “But Minho, this is getting so big. What if it affects Minjun more than it already has? What if your career—”

He shakes his head, hands finding yours. “Look, whatever happens, we face it together. Yejun is trying to isolate us and make us feel weak by dividing us. I won’t let her. I love you, Y/nnie, and I need you to know that.”

The affirmation, so heartfelt and desperate, breaks through your resolve to distance yourself. You nod, squeezing his hands back, finding strength in his conviction.

“We’ll deal with this,” Minho continues, his voice firm despite the chaos around you. “I’ll talk to the lawyers, and see what legal avenues we have to protect ourselves and Minjun. And Chan is right—we’ll work with the PR team to set the record straight.”

True to his word, Minho arranged meetings with his legal team, and together with the public relations department, they began crafting a response that would address the allegations head-on. Chan was a constant presence, offering both strategic advice and moral support, and his friendship was a steady force in the tumult.

As the week progressed, strategies were implemented. The company issued a statement denouncing the unfounded accusations and highlighting Minho’s dedication as a father, accompanied by testimonials from colleagues and friends outside the group who vouched for his character and his role in Minjun’s life.

Yet, despite the countermeasures, the shadow of the scandal lingered. The press was relentless, and the public's appetite for celebrity drama was insatiable. Minho found himself scrutinizing every decision and every interaction with Minjun and you, aware that the eyes of the world were now critically watching.

Minho asked you to move in with them so it'd be easier for him to keep you safe. It didn't change much for you since you've been staying over a lot already and barely went back home. So, of course, you said yes. 

Two months later 

Felix's birthday is just around the corner, and you're almost a little surprised when he comes to you to invite you all. He giggles at your stunned look and tilts his head at you. “You look like you've seen a ghost.”

“I'm just…did you ask Min?” you ask nervously. 

“No,” Felix shakes his head. “He's busy right now, and I'm inviting you as you are part of his and, therefore, our family.”

“Oh,” you nod gently, a shy smile covering your lips. “Sure, I'd love to be there,” you nod. “I bet Minjun would love it as well, and Minho will surely be there.”

“Lovely,” he smiles and gives you a gentle hug. 

Minho later walks in, Minjun sitting on his shoulders with a wide grin. “Y/nnie!” Minjun shouts and waves at you. “Look, I'm tall!”

“Oh yeah, you're really tall now, buddy!” you assure him. 

Minho giggles softly, stopping in front of you and greeting you with a soft kiss. “Hey there,” he says fondly. 

“Hey,” you smile back at him. “Ready to go home?” you ask, and Minho hums softly. 

“Minjun is staying over at Chan and Felix's tonight,” he says, and you frown at him, surprised. 

“The whole night?” you ask, and Minho hums agreeing. Over the past two months, you've been letting Minjun stay with all of the boys for a few hours each. It helped him grow less dependent on Minho, and he became more confident about staying somewhere else for a while. Minjun seemed happy, and Minho was more than glad. It allowed you all to grow together. “What's the occasion?” you ask curiously. Chan and Felix had been the ones Minjun loved staying with a lot. Chan once told Minho how much Felix loved having him around, and so the two of them made sure their boyfriend and son got what they loved. 

“Maybe I just want to take you out for dinner without having to glance at the time,” he smiles softly, letting Minjun down as he spots his beloved ‘Changnin’. Minho’s hands find your waist, eyes growing soft the longer he looks at you. “Maybe I want to kiss you stupid after without worrying about a certain someone bursting in and going ‘eww’.”

You giggle softly at the memory of Minjun catching Minho kissing you a little more passionately than he'd do in front of him. “Sounds lovely,” you chuckle. 

Minho hums gently, searching your eyes as if he doesn't know if he should keep talking or not. “Maybe…Maybe I'd be ready to take the next step,” he says, and your eyes widen. “No pressure or anything, though. Just..if it feels right if we're both comfortable tonight…I think I'm ready.”

You can't bite back the giddy smile covering your lips. Over the months you've been with Minho, you have never gone much further than kissing. He once covered your neck with loving little bites, but you didn't get much further with Minjun, only a few doors further. You've been able to tell how Minho grew a little impatient every time things were developing into something more, but there was simply no chance you two could take the time you'd need for your first time together with a child around the house. “You're sure?” you ask gently, and Minho nods. 

“I'm sure, my love,” he says sweetly, making your stomach flutter already. 

“I love you, Min,” you whisper, watching his eyes sparkle with joy. 

“I love you too, Y/nnie,” he says softly. “Come on, let's make sure Minjun is with Chan and Felix,” Minho suggests with a playful nudge, guiding you toward them. 

Felix is already fooling around with Minjun, and Chan is watching them fondly. “Are you ready to go?” Chan asks as you reach them. 

“Yeah, everything is done,” Minho nods, smirking at Minjun. “Are you ready to stay with Lix and Channie?”

“Yes, Daddy,” Minjun nods happily, and Minho crouches down in front of him.

“I’ll pick you up tomorrow, yeah? Uncle Channie will take you to the studio with him if you want to,” he tells him, gently squeezing his little hands. “Be good, yeah? No discussions about bedtime either, baby.”

“Yes, Daddy,” Minjun nods eagerly and tightly hugs him goodbye. “I love you,” he says softly.

“I love you too, dumpling,” Minho smiles and kisses his cheek, gently brushing back his curls. 

You gently rest your hand on his shoulder, silently reminding him to let go of him. It’s also the first night for Minho without his boy since Yejun left. Minho does, and Minjun’s hugging you goodbye tightly. Chan chuckles softly, noticing Minho’s worried frown. “I’ll return him intact, I promise,” he winks at him, and Minho relaxes with a chuckle. 

Felix lifts up Minjun, smiling reassuringly at Minho. “We’ll take good care of him,” he tells him.

“I know,” he assures them gently. “Just new for me as well,” he laughs, gently poking Minjun’s cheek. “Be good, yeah?”

“You too,” he says, making everyone giggle. 

Minho rolls his eyes fondly, winking at him. “Yeah, okay.” His hand finds yours as they leave, and you squeeze it softly. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but he’s growing up way too fast,” he chuckles with a soft sigh. 

“Mhm, yeah, I can’t believe you saying this either,” you snort teasingly.

“Shut up, will you?” he laughs, gently shoving your side. “Alright, let’s go,” he gives himself a push.

The two of you reach his car outside the building. As you both settle in, a sense of nervous excitement fills the air - a mixture of anticipation for the evening ahead and the deep emotional connection that has grown between you two. 

Back at home, the two of you get ready, and you let Minho match your outfits since he has a way better eye for what’s needed in public. You barely got used to people taking pictures of him when you were only his assistant, but now you had to excel yourself as his boyfriend. Minho does his best to make you feel comfortable and look presentable for pictures whenever you’re out together. Once he’s done, he hums to himself happily, smacking your butt lovingly. Typical.

The drive is quiet but comfortable, filled with shared glances and soft smiles, each exchange weaving a deeper layer of intimacy. As you arrive at the restaurant, Minho’s hand finds yours, his grip reassuring and warm. You soon blend out the people around you, focusing on him only. This isn’t very hard to do because something about Minho caught your attention long before you started dating. 

Minho is more relaxed lately now that the whole mess with Yejun is settled. All of his friends repeatedly spoke out for him, and two weeks ago, Minho attended a press conference dealing with the matter. You know that hadn’t been easy for him, but he had been rather open and honest, making sure all the rumors were addressed and settled. He also made sure to clarify that you’ve been working for him for years, slowly taking more and more care of Minjun and growing closer with him in the process. She did her best to take him back to court, but looking at the circumstances, it only benefited Minho, who refused all of the payments she’d have to make for dragging his name through dirt and spreading lies.

After dinner, Minho suggests a walk, and you wander through a nearby park adorned with twinkling lights and soft shadows. You stop beneath a street lantern, its soft glow painting the scene in an almost magical light. Minho turns to you, his eyes reflecting the twinkling lights, his face etched with tenderness.

“Y/nnie,” he begins, his voice a whisper of emotion. “Being with you has made me happier than I’ve been in a long time. I feel like I can finally breathe like I’m more myself than I’ve ever been.” You listen, your heart swelling with each word, the sincerity in his voice anchoring the swirling emotions inside you. “And I want to share everything with you. Not just the dinners or the walks, or the laughs we have with Minjun. I want to share all the moments, even those we’ve yet to live,” he continues, his hand reaching up to gently caress your cheek. “I love you so much, and I’ll be there as long as you let me.”

The emotional weight of his words pulls you closer, and you find your lips meeting in a kiss that speaks volumes. It’s tender at first, explorative, and as if each of you is memorizing the feel of the other. The kiss deepens; it grows more passionate, fueled by the months of growing love and restrained desire.

Minho’s arms wrap around you, pulling you closer. His hands trace the lines of your back, pressing you into his warmth. You respond in kind, weaving your hands into his hair, pulling him closer, deepening the kiss until it’s all that exists in the world - the two of you, beneath the warm lights, lost in each other.

Eventually, the need for air forces you apart, but only slightly. Foreheads pressed together, breathing mingled, you share a quiet laugh - a moment of pure happiness and mutual understanding.

“Let’s go home?” you ask gently, and he hums in response.

The walk back to the car is filled with easy silence, which is comfortable and reassuring. Once home, Minho leads you to your bedroom, his hand steady in yours, a silent promise of what’s to come - a night of exploring, of loving, of affirming the feelings that have been simmering beneath the surface for so long. His lips entangle yours in a passionate kiss as he silently closes the door behind you. The back of your knees hit the edge of the mattress, and you both drop down into it. Minho hovers over you, eyes filled with nothing but pure adoration and love. He’s bracing himself next to your head, caging your legs in with his knees, and leans down, capturing your lips in another fierce kiss. His body moves on its own, searching yours, and the minute your hands find his hips, he lowers himself onto his elbows, closing the distance between your bodies. “Shit,” he mutters against your lips as you arch into him.

You reach down, testing the waters and palming him through his pants. Minho’s hips stutter, a soft moan leaving him, head dropping against your shoulder. “Minho?” you ask softly, noticing how desperately his body reacts to your every touch without him even fully realizing it. “When was the last time you had some time for yourself…like this?”

Minho laughs, planting a row of gentle kisses against your neck. “My sweet love, you have no idea,” he chuckles. “Remember that clingy kid of mine?” he asks, making you laugh as well. 

“Right,” you giggle and kiss his cheek. 

“Just tell me what you need, love; I’ll do it,” Minho promises gently, smiling down at you fondly. “We have time.”

Minho’s whispered promise lingers in the air, the warmth of his smile making your heart flutter. The room feels isolated from the world, a private sanctuary where the past complexities and external pressures fade into the background. Here, it’s just the two of you, bound by an intimacy that has deepened with each shared struggle and joy.

You guide his hand beneath your shirt, letting him explore your bare skin. Your breath hitches as he follows your silent directions with attentive care. Minho’s touch is skilled, a perfect blend of tender and assured, driven by his desire to bring you comfort and pleasure. His eyes never leave yours, seeking confirmation and encouragement, his own desire mirrored in the deepening blush of your cheeks.

“Is this okay?” he murmurs, his voice rough with emotion. His fingertips trace patterns along the waistband of your trousers that leave you breathless.

“More than okay,” you manage to reply, your voice a whisper caught between sighs. The room fills with the sound of your intertwined breaths, a testament to the closeness that both of you cherish.

Minho’s movements become more purposeful. His free hand cradles your face, his thumb caressing your jawline as he watches the effects of his actions reflected in your expressions. The world narrows down to the shifting shadows cast by the dim light, the soft bedding beneath you, and the man who has come to mean so much. He has barely touched you and you’re already melting into a puddle. How the hell would you survive this?

PART FOUR | PART SIX

MASTERLISTS | PROMPT LIST | GUIDELINES

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[cersworld]

When you end up being stood up and alone on your eighteenth birthday, it becomes apparent that there's a need for change. Change that may, or may not, involve the cute, wannabe-rockstar you end up having your birthday dinner with after your friends are a no-show.

SUPERSTAR LINE-UP! y/n l/n as 'miss IT girl', beomgyu choi as 'the loser, new kid', kai huening as 'the cute-ass drummer', yeonjun choi as 'epic frontman', taehyun kang as 'bass and brains', soobin choi as 'sick (literally, not figuratively) pianist', and more!

yejun lim (oc) as 'the dirtbag ex', sooji kim (oc) as 'y/n wannabe' and more!

SETTING THE SCENE! high school romance, coming-of-age, comedy, angst.

TAGLIST! tba.

TW! none for now?

cast! leading lad(ie)s ...and others

let the show begin!

episode 1 — oh the woes of teenagehood

episode 2 — classist actions

episode 3 — hate speech is not tolerated! unless...

episode 4 — introduction of the male lead (derogatory)

episode 5 — he's all that (who is lying to him?)

episode 6 — eat with the snails: a study if garbage disposal

episode 7 — tba.

—

[all-about-kyu]

Summary: After the ups and downs of being in the public eye throughout your pregnancy, the time finally comes to meet your little one. Pairing: idol!Seonghwa x model!reader Tropes: established relationship au, new parents au, idol au, celebrity au Genre: fluff Rating: PG Warnings: allusions to childbirth, happy crying, breastfeeding, language Word Count: 2,141 Note: part of the Desire universe and for my anniversary! (enjoy the nod to her display name as the title) thank you to @anyamaris for beta reading!!

Before You Interact

Seonghwa had been panicking all day. You had gone into labor around 3am but still didn’t start active labor until hours after arriving at the hospital. After hours of physically and mentally exhausting labor, your son was finally in your arms. Even after your doctor confirmed that both you and your son were healthy, your boyfriend really couldn’t relax. When you feed Yejun for the first time, Seonghwa finally relaxes and lays him down to sleep in the bassinet.

“We’re parents.” He sighs happily, squishing onto the hospital bed beside you.

“Yes, we are.” You chuckle, “You finally relaxed now?”

Your boyfriend nods, “It was a crazy morning.”

“Yeah,” you let out a breathy laugh, “I just spent 8 hours pushing him out of me.”

Seonghwa kisses your hair, “And you did an amazing job. He’s perfect.”

Seonghwa looks over at your sleeping son and smiles brightly. He’s so proud to call himself a father; your son is everything he could ever wish for and more. He then turns to you and cups your face in his hands. You smile softly at him, and he returns the look. Your boyfriend leans in and kisses you softly. The tender moment is disrupted by multiple notifications from your phone. When you glance at it, you notice that it’s only 1pm.

“Should we let the others know he’s here? I’m sure Danbi is pacing through your dorm right now, and Mingi is trying to get her to sit down.” You joke.

“You should rest.” He worries.

You shake your head, “I’m actually quite awake… I think I’m on some sort of adrenaline high.”

Seonghwa shakes his head at you and looks down at his hand intertwined with yours. He frees his hand a moment later and texts your group chat to let everyone know Yejun has finally arrived. It takes all of two minutes to have Eunji FaceTiming you. Despite your clearly disheveled state, you answer.

“Can we come?” She asks, skipping all courtesies.

“Hi Eunji, I’m great! Yejun and I are healthy and safe.”

“Can we come then?!” She questions again.

Seonghwa butts in, “Yeah, visiting hours end at 4pm tonight so if any of you plan to come you’re welcome to.”

“I’m meeting my nephew!” You hear Yunho yell in the background followed by a door slamming.

Of course, the rest of your friends were all holed up together in the Ateez dorm. You hear Yejun quietly whining, alerting you of his waking state. Quickly, you say goodbye to your friends, and Seonghwa tells them the maximum number of visitors at a time. You reach your son and see him slowly blink as he wakes up. You know he can’t see much of anything yet, but he knows it’s you. During your prenatal class, you learned that babies have an incredible ability to sense their parents without even really seeing them well. Carefully, you lift him up and hold him close to your body. You gave birth to him just over two hours ago, and already you can’t get enough of holding him. Returning to your bed, you feed him again, and Seonghwa offers to attempt his first diaper change. You both quickly found out Yejun does not enjoy them. 

Once he’s changed, Seonghwa carries him back to you. You both sit there for a while, holding Yejun and Seonghwa, wrapping his arms around you. Honestly, you don’t know how you’ve ever lived any other way before having both your boys. A soft knock sounds on your door, interrupting the domestic moment.

“I’ll go get it.” Seonghwa offers, “It’s probably our friends.”

You nod and look back down at Yejun, who is fast asleep again. Seonghwa is quietly talking with someone at the door, but you can’t be bothered to pay attention due to how enamored you are by your son. You hear footsteps growing louder, then feel Seonghwa’s hand gently curl over your shoulder. Looking up, you look at your boyfriend then see Yunho. You suppose his mad dash out of the dorm made him the first to arrive. It wouldn’t surprise you if he didn’t even wait for anyone else to get in the car before he left.

“Do you want to hold him?” You ask quietly after you notice Yunho’s shocked state.

The tall man nods and takes a few steps closer, “He’s so tiny.” He comments once you pass him the baby.

“He is only two hours old.” You laugh, “Of course he’s tiny.”

In Yunho’s hands, Yejun looks even smaller. His large hands are about half of your son’s entire body length. For a moment, you think your friend may cry. He’s been excited for you to have Yejun from the moment he found out about your pregnancy. You, Yunho, and Seonghwa chat for a while. Yunho holds your son as long as he can until Yejun grows fussy and Seonghwa takes him back. Suddenly, Yunho’s phone starts ringing in his pocket. He sighs when he sees the caller and accepts the FaceTime call.

“Hello, Mingi.” He says in a playfully annoyed tone.

“Mingi’s parking the car. Get your ass out of there. I need to see Yejun right now.” Danbi yells into the phone.

“Okay, okay. He’s fussy so have fun with that.”

You look over and see Seonghwa pacing while gently rocking him and humming quietly; the amount of love poring from his eyes makes your heart soar with butterflies. Yejun won’t calm down, though. You motion for your boyfriend to bring him to you. Instantly, Yejun calms and seems to be searching for your chest in hopes of milk. After that, Yunho dismisses himself to allow you the privacy of feeding.

“What?” You question when you notice Seonghwa watching you.

“Nothing.”

“Nothing? You’re staring at our son while he’s eating.” You tease.

Seonghwa smiles brightly and sits at the foot of the bed.

“It’s beautiful. You’re beautiful. He’s beautiful. I couldn’t imagine life without you both.” 

Another knock raps on the door. You quickly pull your hospital gown up and over your son as he continues to feed. Seonghwa pops his head out the door and then allows the guests in. Both your friends step into the room. Their boyfriends are nowhere to be seen yet.

“Where–”

“Currently latched to my chest.” You cut off Danbi, “He’s hungry.”

A few moments later, Yejun is done feeding, and you strategically move him from under the gown to lay him against your shoulder to burp him. Once he does, you hold him for both Eunji and Danbi to see. Danbi looks like she’s in some sort of elated shock. You don’t expect to see Eunji almost instantly break down in tears. She walks closer but doesn’t reach out to hold him due to her state. She had done her own research and didn’t want to risk him getting sick in any way.

“He’s so…” She tapers off.

Eunji steps into your bathroom and cleans her hands (maybe too thoroughly) before returning and asking to hold him. She looks at him as if he’s her world. On more than one occasion, she’s mentioned that she doesn’t want kids of her own. Luckily, Yeosang feels the same way. The two of them are more than happy being an aunt and uncle to whoever ends up having kids in your friend group. 

You look for Seonghwa, but notice he stepped out. He knew it was a raw and personal moment for Danbi and Eunji to meet your son. You’re thankful he gave that moment to them despite his papa bear mode already being present two hours into your son’s life. The door opens again, and You see your boyfriend walk in with Mingi and Yeosang in tow. Yeosang immediately wraps his arms around Eunji from behind and rests his chin on her shoulder. He looks at Yejun in her arms and smiles softly. The entire scene melts your heart. 

Despite not wanting to hand off your son, she reluctantly passes him to Mingi. Yet again, your son looks pea-sized in his hands. Danbi breaks from her excitement-induced stupor. She reaches over and rubs her finger along Yejun’s soft cheek. He thinks it’s a food source and tries to latch onto it. She lets out a quiet giggle at the action. Mingi has a goofy smile on his face. You know he’s happy, though. His eyes are sparkling looking at the infant in his hands. Since he panicked about finding your pregnancy tests in Danbi’s bathroom, he’s been vocal about his wish for kids in the future. Though, he and Danbi agreed, not for a while still. 

“The other four are blowing up the group chat, waiting to get in here.” Seonghwa laughs lightly, “I’m sure they want to meet him before his mother passes out on us.”

“I’m fine.” You protest. Your yawn betrays your sentiment. 

Danbi nods, “As much as we’d love to stay, I have a few exams to prepare for, and somebody has meetings tomorrow.” She comments, throwing Mingi a playfully annoyed look.

Yeosang looks at Yejun being passed back to you. His eyes are wide and shiny. Somewhere between concerned and enamored. As much as he loves your son already, him being just over three hours old now makes him scared that he’ll break him somehow. 

“Did we get the godparents title?” Eunji asks, eyes locked on Yejun.

“You know damn well you share that with all of us!” Mingi whines.

His volume causes Yejun to burst out in tears. Not used to loud sounds yet. You bounce him lightly and shush him. Yeosang’s concerned yet enamored face intensifies and the four of them quickly excuse themselves. (Much to Eunji’s dismay). After the door is shut again, another yawn escapes your lips.

“If you’re too tired, my love, we can tell Joong, San, Wooyoung, and Jongho to come by tomorrow.” Seonghwa tells you with a bit of worry in his tone.

You shake your head, “It’s okay. It wouldn’t be fair to them if everyone else got to meet him today.”

Seonghwa sighs, “It’s what your limit is, and his is too… if you’re too tired if he’s too tired… they’ll understand.”

“Seonghwa, we’re okay.” You offer a soft smile. 

Despite his lingering concern, Seonghwa leaves to retrieve the last four people who need to meet your little one. The moment the door knob clicks open, San is bursting through the door, with Wooyoung not far behind. Both of them look over the moon with joy and excitement. Wooyoung is the first to get to hold him. San whines about it the whole time. The slightly younger male rambles on and on in a quiet voice about how much fun they’ll have when he’s older. Eventually, San steals the baby from him and looks at him with a sweet, dimpled smile.

“He looks a lot like Seonghwa.” He chuckles, “Almost identical to the baby pictures we’ve seen of him.”

“You trying to say he looks nothing like me?” You tease.

San nods, “Exactly that!” He giggles, “Seriously though, you two are going to be amazing parents. I’m happy for you.”

Wooyoung and San hoard Yejun, Hongjoong, and Jongho hang back the whole time and quietly observe. That is, until, San passes the newborn to Hongjoong when he notices just how tired you’re getting and drags a very chatty Wooyoung out of the room. Hongjoong looks like a fish out of water, to say the least. Then, Yejun blinks up at him. His expression completely changes, and he looks as though he could melt at any moment.

“A new first mate?” He teases Seonghwa.

“Don’t push it. Make your own first mate if you really want one.”

Hongjoong laughs quietly, “But you’re so good at the job. I’m sure Yejun would be just as good.”

The two go back and forth for a while. In the meantime, Jongho pulls a chair closer to you. 

“You did good.” He states plainly.

“Thank you?”

“I’m serious. I couldn’t have imagined Seonghwa in this position a few years ago. You’re really good for him, and having Yejun showed me even more that you two are special. You know… when he first mentioned wanting to ask you out properly, he came to me for advice. I’m really happy he did. He loves you, and now Yejun, more than anyone on this planet or further. You did good.” He smiles softly at you.

“Jongho,” you pause for a moment, “Thank you.”

He nods, “Of course, I’ll hold him another time, okay?”

“Are you sure?” You question your maternal instincts, kicking in full force.

He nods again, “I can just tell how exhausted you and Seonghwa are. He’s just not letting it on. And I’m sure Yejun is exhausted from meeting people all afternoon, too. Get some rest. You all deserve it.”

COPYRIGHT STARLITMARK 2023© ALL RIGHTS RESERVED — reposting/modifying any fic or piece of original writing posted on this blog is not allowed. Translations are not permitted. 

Networks: @kwritersworld @k-vanity @cultofdionysusnet

Tag List: @sanjoongie @jaehunnyy @ericssmile @anyamaris @almondmilkeu @shinestarhwaa @northerngalaxy

[colormepurplex2]

In Memory of Him | It's Cold In Here

↳ Florist!Taehyung x Artist!f.Reader ⤜ Non-Idol, Late Husband's Best Friend ⤜ Rating: MA 🔞 ⤜ WC: 13,558 ⚠️ Mild language, death/loss of a loved one, deep depression, high anxiety, loads of guilt, hidden feelings, realizations, hurt feelings, repressed feelings, hurt/comfort

Next Chapter⇾ (coming soon!) ◅ Back to story masterlist

With trembling fingers, you smooth out the letter that you found attached to a bundle of flowers on your doorstep.

To the love of my life, For after the funeral Take a deep breath, baby, I know it’s not easy. Even as I sit and write this, I can feel your energy in the next room. You’re always such a worrier, I’m sorry I’ve added to that. It’ll all be better soon, I promise. But, I know you and I know that you’ll pull away, you’ll cut yourself off…and we can’t have that, now can we? You have to keep going if we’re to stay connected even after I’m gone.

So, here’s the first of a collection of some things that you can hold and look back on when the storm starts to roll in. There are only so many words in existence to describe what you mean to me. So, instead of words, I want you to remember these feelings: Warmth - like the sun on your face while you read a great book Satisfaction - the way you sigh softly after a good, lazy day in bed Contentment - waking up with a smile on your face every morning Peace - that moment of quiet before the rain starts, when the scent of petrichor filters in These are all the things you’ve brought into my life the last seven years. I’ve never been able to look at the sun, sleeping, smiles, or storms the same. Never did I imagine I’d meet and marry such a beautiful, kind-hearted soul with a genuinely unique outlook on life. I never had to be reminded to smile because it just came so naturally whenever you were around. You have brought so much light into my world and gave me the best years of my life. You also gave me Sujin, the perfect little replica of myself even if you think he looks more like you than me (I secretly agree, but that’s not something I’ll admit outloud). When I look at our wonderful son, I’m reminded of the beauty that first drew me to you all those years ago. Being his father is the second greatest achievement of my life, the first being making you fall madly in love with me…don’t laugh, you know it’s true. Many people see things in black and white, a beginning and an end…but our life isn’t like that. We’re full of color and everything in between. You’ve supported me at my best and have loved me at my worst. Everything good in my life is because of you. I know you’ll always love me, and I know it won’t be easy once I’m gone, but I need you to promise me you’ll continue to wake up with that smile on your face and never forget how the sun feels or how beautiful the quiet before the storm is. I need my light, my girl, to keep going. Be that guiding light so I know exactly where you are in the world as I watch over you and Sujin. We knew forever wasn’t guaranteed, that’s just the way life is, right? This doesn’t mean it’s over, not by a long shot. You still have so much more to give, so much more love to offer.  I know you’d never forget about me, that’s not what this letter is for—it’s not a reminder of me, it’s a reminder to live, love, and keep shining. There are more where this came from, Taehyung has them and knows what to do, but not until you’re ready for them. I love you so much, never stop living—for me, for Sujin…for you. Love forever, Your Yejun

The letter crumples in your fist, the bundle of hibiscus and lavender it was attached to forgotten on the step between your feet as you bury your face in the crook of your elbow and scream. It’s better that way—the symbolism of the hibiscus flower on a letter from Yejun is a punch to the gut when he’s no longer here. Eternity? Bullshit. The sound is muffled into the thick wool of your coat but no less filled with agony. As if the day wasn’t hard enough, everything went belly-up when you found the flowers and the letter on your door step. You choke on a breath of air as you try to control yourself.

“Yejun.” His name drips from your trembling lips, absorbed into your jacket sleeve like your cries. “I miss you so much. Why did you have to leave us?”

A hand on your shoulder makes you flinch, jerking away from the potential comfort, despite it being exactly what you need right now. You crowd against the wall, knees knocking into one another as you huddle in on yourself where you’re sitting in the stairwell outside your apartment door.

“Hey, hey, hey, come here,” a strong, soothing voice coos. Your limbs protest weakly for a moment, your heart raging with guilt at the prospect of finding solace in another man’s arms—even if that man is Taehyung, your now late husband's best friend—but the desperate need for someone to hold your pieces together wins out. You fear if you let yourself truly break, you’ll never be able to be made whole again. You frantically launch into those open arms, keening a wail into the solid chest between them. “Shh, it’s okay. I’ve got you.”

💔💔💔

Two years later

“Mommy, are we going to Uncle Tae’s house today?” Sujin asks from behind you, where he’s strapped into his booster seat.

You glance in the rearview mirror, angling yourself so you catch a glimpse of his smile as he stares out the window, patiently awaiting your answer. It’s gotten easier over the last two years to look at him without growing weepy. He looks like and reminds you so much of Yejun. They have the same chestnut-colored eyes and floppy midnight tresses. When he smiles, the tiny dimple on his left cheek is a near mirror to his father’s and something that your eyes seek out every time he flashes you a grin. Little pieces of his father that fill the gaps in your heart.

“Did you not want to stay at Grandma’s tonight? That’s what you said you wanted yesterday,” you remind him.

Sujin hums like he’s thinking hard about your question. “Well, I did want to go to Grandma’s, but I also want to see Uncle Tae, and plus, he always has good ice cream. All Grandma has is boring vanilla.”

“How about we see if Uncle Tae wants to hang out this weekend? I think Grandma would be sad if you decided not to stay with her tonight.”

In truth, you’d also be a bit disappointed if Sujin changed his mind. Being only four when his father passed, he doesn’t remember Yejun much, mostly knows him from photos and stories he’s heard. So, it’s not surprising he’s not able to put together that today is the second anniversary of his father’s passing. He doesn’t know that tonight isn’t just about your mom getting a visit. It’s also about you having an evening to grieve without being under your son's watchful and inquisitive eye.

Though maybe you’re wrong, perhaps he knows more than you think as he responds softly, “It’s okay, Mommy, I’ll stay with Grandma so you can go visit Daddy.”

If it wasn’t for tightening your grip on the steering wheel, you might have driven right off the highway. “You know what today is?” you ask hesitantly once your initial shock passes.

“Of course I do,” Sujin says with another smile, his dimple catching in the afternoon sunlight coming in through the car window. “I might not remember him, but I could never forget him.” It’s a wonder there aren’t more six-year-old poets, as what he just said is easily the most eloquent thing ever uttered by a child. Your heart swells, and you feel that telltale burn in the back of your nose and behind your eyes as you blink away the flood of emotions threatening to spill into the open.

You nod, taking a deep breath. “That’s right. He’d be so proud of you and how much you’ve grown.”

“He’d be proud of you, too, Mommy.”

It’s another blow, directly targeting the cracks already forming in your armor. Fissures zip and snap over the surface of the wall you’ve spent the last two years building. “Thank you, buddy. I love you,” you manage to get past the lump in your throat. 

The rest of the car ride home is spent with Sujin telling you about his day at school and how one of his classmates snuck a salamander into the classroom after recess. You hum, haw, and laugh as he recounts the way the class reacted to the discovery of the amphibian.

It makes you feel lighter, listening to his words and hearing the clear whimsy his heart possesses as the salamander suddenly becomes a dragon and Sujin, the fearless knight that saved the teacher—the damsel in distress—by scooping it up and putting it in an empty lunch box.

“She said since I was so brave and such a good helper that I could go outside with Mr. Kim, the science teacher, and help him release it back into the wild,” he proudly proclaims. “Did you know salamanders like water? Mr. Kim said they’re kind of like frogs even though they look more like lizards.” Sujin continues on, spouting off facts he learned about the salamander from his science teacher.

It’s a short drive from the school to your apartment. You’ve often thought about moving, using some of the life insurance money from Yejun to buy you and Sujin a lovely place outside the city. But, your mom lives just a floor up, and it’s been convenient having someone so close to look after Sujin when you need them, like tonight.

Having your mom close by, not just as a babysitter but also as an emotional support outlet, has been a blessing and far outweighs the other feelings—the seemingly endless void that now lingers in place of your late husband. With that, though, you can’t help looking at your small apartment as more like a preservation of memories. It was the first place you and Yejun moved into after getting married. It’s the place you both brought Sujin home to when he was born. It’s still filled with so many memories…you’re not sure you want to leave—at least, not yet.

The building has no elevator, just several winding flights of steps right up the middle. “Go on up to Grandma’s. I’ll stop by with dinner before I leave. Remember, homework first before you play.”

Sujin gives you a beaming smile and nods his head in understanding before vaulting up the stairs, his strong six-year-old legs carrying him far faster than your own. You watch him disappear up the stairs—the last flash of his face so reminiscent of Yejun racing up those very same steps the day you moved in—followed by the familiar sound of your mother’s voice drifting out over and down the stairwell as she welcomes him into her space—a safe space, away from the looming cloud of darkness over you.

Knowing he’s occupied and cared for, you allow your mask to slip just a little. The weight on your shoulders eases as you let the emotional fatigue roll in and replace your typically calm and collected demeanor. Even after two years, it’s not gotten any easier when this particular day comes. The holidays are hard, sure. There are plenty of days where you find yourself feeling like it’s too much…but nothing truly compares to this day. It’s not filled with happy memories the way those other days are. It’s nothing but darkness. There is a constant ache in your chest, which is amplified when the calendar turns over, and you find yourself once again reliving that fateful day all over again.

You spent nearly every waking hour sitting beside Yejun, the uncomfortable, stiff hospital chair becoming your permanent perch. The ventilator was always loud, but the punching swoosh grew to be comforting because you knew that meant he was still there. All the lines and tubes hooked up to him made it look like a scene from one of those sci-fi films he enjoyed making you watch with him. Yejun was so full of life when you first met, many years before. But, the image stuck in your mind—the one you can’t seem to get rid of—is of him with sallow cheeks and pale, greyish lips, drained of life.

It’s weird to think of watching someone die. But that’s precisely what you did over the six months Yejun was in the hospital. The disease moved quickly, the cancer stealing your husband away bit by bit, and you were powerless to stop it. That’s probably one of the worst parts, the helpless feeling that no matter what you do, you can’t prevent it from happening. No amount of prayer, begging, or screaming would change it. He’d still die, just the same. Day by day, the best parts of the man you loved vanished, and by the end—you feel guilty even thinking the thoughts, so you push them out of your head. 

After unlocking the door, you step into the quiet space of your apartment. Your shoes join the ones discarded by the door before you drop your purse on the small console table against the wall and make your way across the living room to the hall leading to the bedrooms. Sujin’s room is the first door. You peek inside to see that he had made up his bed before school this morning. You make a mental note to grab one of his chocolate popsicles from the freezer before dropping off dinner tonight. He deserves a little treat for being such a good kid.

The small single bathroom sits between Sujin’s room and the larger of the two bedrooms, the one you shared with Yejun for almost five years. You haven’t changed any of the decor. Everything is the same as it always has been, right down to the pillow on Yejun’s side of the bed. It took months before you mustered the courage to wash the pillow case and cried the entire time you stripped the pillow and plopped it in the washer.

The pillow was small fish compared to the closet. Going through all of Yejun’s clothes nearly took you out. Thankfully, Taehyung was there to help. You weren’t the only one that lost someone two years ago today. Taehyung and Yejun grew up together and worked together for the last dozen years, starting out as teens together at Taehyung’s parents' florist shop. They are—were—as close as brothers, and not just for the fact that Taehyung’s parents took Yejun in when his parents both passed, but because of their unbreakable bond—a bond nearly as strong as the one you had with Yejun.

Taehyung has been there for you whenever you’ve needed him since Yejun’s passing. All it takes is a phone call or a text message, and he drops everything for you. You try not to take advantage of it because you don’t want him sucked into your empty void any more than he already is. No grown man should be attached to a woman like that, especially when he has no obligation for it.

But, you must admit, it’s nice knowing he’s there…especially today. This is the one day of the year that you know you don’t have to text or call Taehyung for him to show up. His one promise to you. He’ll be there, waiting for you at the cemetery, just like he was last year.

You pull off your oversized t-shirt and worn jeans covered in splotches of paint from your time in the studio today. Once a well-known local artist, you haven’t been able to create anything worthwhile since Yejun passed. He would always joke about being your one true muse. It seems he wasn’t wrong. Everything you’ve been able to create in the last two years feels wrong, like it’s missing something.

The life insurance you received from Yejun has been more than enough to keep you and Sujin afloat. However, you feel like a failure having even to touch that money, even if it’s just to pay the bills. If you could just get your life together, you’d be able to provide for yourself and Sujin the way you once did—before everything happened. Shoving that line of thinking away, you focus on the here and now, just getting through the next handful of hours.

A quick shower later, and you’re dressed in a warm sweater and a clean pair of jeans with thick wool socks. It’s cold, winter having well and truly taken hold outside, but when the sun goes down, the bite from the wind grows more bitter. Grabbing the large, lidded bowl of beef stew you had cooking in the slow cooker all day. You wrap it in a dish towel to keep from burning your hands on the hot sides, snag a popsicle for Sujin, and make the short trip upstairs to your mom’s place.

“Hey, sweetheart,” your mom greets you when she opens the door. She’s gotten a lot more grey in her hair in the last year or so. The steel-colored strands stand out against her temples, framing her strong but still soft face. You used to think she looked too austere, but then you realized that was just the permanent mark of motherhood and time.

“Hi, Mom. Did Sujin get his homework done?” You follow your mom in, shutting and locking the door behind you as she ambles into the kitchen on the other side of the living room. Her apartment is a near mirror of your own, her second bedroom set up for Sujin as well.

“He finished a bit ago and wanted to break out the paints. Was nattering on about some sort of lizard, I think. He wanted to try to paint it,” she explains, putting the tea kettle on without needing to ask. Peppermint tea with a dollop of honey can fix even the worst of woes in her eyes. She’ll insist you have some just as she has any other time she can feel your darkness crowding in. You’ve grown to appreciate your mother's intuition, both for yourself and your son's sake.

“There was an incident involving a student bringing in a salamander at school, it seems. Sujin helped the teacher and was allowed to go out with Namjoon—Mr. Kim—to release it.” You recall the conversation in the car, your mother chuckling softly when you tell her about the salamander turning into a dragon.

She busies herself, packing the tea steeper with her own blend of mint tea. Tending the small garden of herbs and spices that she keeps on the fire escape off the living room, is how she spends most of her days since she retired a few years ago. Even in winter, she keeps a small plastic greenhouse over them, opening it just enough to care for them each day. “So, you’re on a first-name basis with that science teacher now?” she asks. You can tell she’s lightly probing, trying to figure out if there is anything more between you and ‘Mr. Kim’.

“I met him at the beginning of the year when we had parent-teacher meetings. He insisted I call him Namjoon, that’s all, Mom.”

Humming, she grabs the kettle just before it begins to whistle. “Still, he’s nice?” she asks, casting you a glance over her shoulder.

You pull your bottom lip between your teeth, wishing she’d not try to go down this path of questioning. You know she means well, but you’re just…you’re not ready to think about those things.

“He’s nice enough, Mom, I guess. It was just a slip of the tongue. I’m used to greeting him at drop-off in the mornings. It’s not—I don’t, it’s just being cordial, y’know? I’m not ready…” you trail off, hoping your mom picks up on what you’re trying to say so you don’t actually have to say it; not today.

Her free hand goes to her mouth, covering her frown. “Oh, sweetheart, I didn’t mean—you know I’d never, not like that. I’m sorry. Forgive an old fool for her loose words.”

“It’s okay, Mom, really,” you offer with a tight smile as you set the stew on the counter and pop the popsicle you brought for Sujin in the freezer.

She sets down the tea, the cup slightly trembling on the tiny saucer she serves it on. “I made some pajeon to go with the stew. It’s warming in the oven. Are you going to stay for dinner?” she asks, seeing that you need to move on from the previous subject.

You settle on one of the chairs at her small dining table, pick up the tiny teacup, and blow across the surface before taking a tentative sip. The mint is a cooling contrast to the heat of the liquid, coating your throat with a soothing sensation. The blooming sweetness of the honey lingers on your tongue, helping combat the intense punch of the minty flavor. It’s comforting. Reminds you of home.

“I’m not all that hungry. You and Sujin enjoy it. You’re sure you’re okay taking him to school tomorrow?” She gives you a fond smile and nods. “I’ll pick him up on my way home and we’ll come have dinner.”

“That’s fine, sweetheart.”

You finish off the tea, suppressing a grimace as it goes down a little too warm and nearly scalds your throat. The sun will be completely down soon, and you’d like to get to the cemetery before it’s too dark out. “I should get going. Just going to say hi to him real quick.”

Your mom watches you stand. Her eyes are hyper-focused on your face. “Okay, sweetheart,” she says slowly. It’s clear she wants to say more, but you’re glad she doesn’t push.

The room your mom has set up for Sujin has a small bed pushed into one corner, leaving the rest of the space for him to play—unlike his room at your place, which has a writing desk and dresser taking up the majority of the play space. He’s never complained, though, choosing to get creative with the small room he does have. “Hey, buddy, Grandma said you’re painting. Can I see?”

You lean on the door jamb, peering into the room. The easel Sujin is using is angled away from the door. All you can see is smears of bright color peeking around the edge of the canvas.

His bright eyes meet yours as he grins extra wide. “It’s not done yet, but of course you can see it.”

Stepping in and around the easel frame, you take in the canvas covered in paint. When your mom said he was going to paint the salamander, you knew there was a possibility of said ‘lizard’ being portrayed as a dragon as it was in Sujin’s story in the car. But what you didn’t expect were the characters surrounding the dragon. You count them, six in total. The brunette woman at the top of the castle tower is clearly Sujin’s teacher, Mrs. Min. Sujin himself is astride the dragon, and who you think is Namjoon stands in a corner near some trees, his large-frame glasses are what lead you to believe that’s who it is. The other three characters are where you’re a bit lost.

“Who are these people?” you ask, gesturing to the other feminine figure framed by two men; one with unruly black hair and the other with small angel wings extending from his shoulders. It dawns on you the moment you ask.

“That’s you, Daddy, and Uncle Tae, of course,” Sujin proudly states. “You were in the tower with Mrs. Min. I’m rescuing her, and Uncle Tae is rescuing you while Daddy guides him.”

You’re not sure what to say. But you can’t help looking at your son in a different light. He’s only six, but in moments like this, you feel like his soul is older and wiser than yours. “It’s lovely,” you finally say, because it truly is, and everything else you could say would definitely start the waterworks, and there will be enough of that later. “I’ll be back tomorrow to get you. Be good for Grandma. There’s a treat for you in the freezer, but only after dinner, okay?” You feel like you’re running away—and maybe you are, but the darkness creeps in just a little bit further the more you look at his painting.

“Yes, ma’am,” Sujin beams at you sweetly. He lifts his chin, angling a cheek in your direction for a kiss. You plant one there, throwing an arm around his back for a quick squeeze, too. “Love you, Mommy.”

“Love you, too, buddy,” you murmur, shoving down the suffocating feeling bubbling in your chest—just need to make it a few more hours.

💔💔💔

The cemetery is about an hour's drive from your place in the city. Yejun grew up in the countryside, and the columbarium where he’s interred is at the cemetery closest to his and Taehyung’s childhood home. It’s a quiet drive, a typical Tuesday evening if it were any other week. You don’t even bother with music, haven’t in the last two years, preferring to just soak in the quiet and try to center yourself.

As you pull into the parking area outside the gate to the grounds, you spot Taehyung’s black SUV. He’s standing beside it, leaning against the driver's side door with his chin tipped down below the line of the thick scarf wrapped around his neck. Your headlights swing across his vehicle, illuminating him in the process as you park.

You take your time climbing out of your car, casting fleeting glances in his direction while you gather your courage and resolve. He’s wearing a thick grey-colored tweed coat that covers him to the knees, and khaki slacks lead down to shiny brown loafers. His hair is windswept, the fluffy waves moving across his forehead with every gust of chilly air.

“Hey,” you say as you swing open your door and step out. He catches your eye over the roof of your car and gives you a soft smile.

“Good evening. Drive okay?”

You nod. “Not too much traffic, which is always nice.”

“You should have let me come and pick you up.” It’s the same thing he said last year, to which you decline politely just the same as well.

“Thanks, but I enjoy the drive. Gives me time to think.”

His eyes flick over you, taking you in from head to toe. There is understanding clear on his face. “Shall we?” He gestures toward the entrance gate. You notice a small bundle of flowers held in his other hand that’s hanging by his side. “Oh, this is for you.” It surprises you when Taehyung offers you the flowers, having thought he was bringing them to leave in Yejun’s vase.

You take the offered cluster, automatically bringing it to your nose and giving it a delicate sniff. It’s hard to smell the fragrance in the cold, but as you peer down at the flowers and take in the deep purple and soft pink, the scent of lavender and hibiscus filters through as if on a memory. It’s a combination that reminds you painfully of Yejun, as this was always his go-to whenever he would bring you home flowers from the shop after work.

“Thank y—“ your polite words cut off as you hear the distinct crackle of paper as you shift the bundle of flowers between your hands. “What’s this?” you ask, holding the flowers up until you see the small envelope attached to the hemp string holding the bunch together.

“A note,” Taehyung responds slowly as if he’s trying to decide if that’s all he’ll say. “Perhaps wait until we’re settled to read it?”

You finger the crisp fold of parchment, wondering. “Okay, yeah,” you agree, chalking it up to most likely being a grievance note from Taehyung, and it might be awkward for you to read it right now in front of him.

The cemetery typically closes at sundown, but Taehyung has access as the gardener. When he and Yejun took over Taehyung’s parents' floral shop, they expanded the business to include landscaping for local companies and establishments. The cemetery is one such establishment they took on. He produces a key from his pocket, unlocking the small pedestrian gate that must have been locked up not too long ago, judging by the sun barely having dipped below the horizon.

“Moojin left about ten minutes before you pulled up,” Taehyung explains casually, confirming the thought you just had. “It’ll just be us, so we can take as much time as we need.”

Maybe you should feel bad that Taehyung gives you preferential treatment and access to the cemetery after hours, but it’s hard to care about that when other, darker feelings have you clutched so tightly. The walk to the columbarium is relatively short, being one of the newer buildings erected within the grounds just some twenty years ago or so.

“The trees are doing well, even in the winter,” you note, nodding toward the row of young pines along the fence line. It was one of the last projects Yejun worked on with Taehyung before he became ill.

“He’d be able to tell you all the properties of the tree that make it sustainable during this time of the year,” Taehyung responds, his voice carrying notes of sadness. Yejun doesn’t come up much in conversation between the two of you, most things not needing to be said, merely understood without a spoken word. So, it’s surprising and endearing to actually hear Taehyung talk about him, especially now.

You smile, knowing he’s right. “With enough scientific jargon to make you go cross-eyed trying to keep up, too.”

That earns you a soft laugh from Taehyung. “And he wouldn’t even realize it until you’re so lost you can’t even pretend to have understood.”

“I miss that,” you whisper with a sigh, your warm breath misting lightly in the cold.

Taehyung slips his arm through yours, hooking his elbow around the crook of your arm. “Me, too.”

💔💔💔

Taehyung

It’s never easy, watching the way you suffer through your emotions. Taehyung knows you try to hide them, and sometimes you’re successful. But others…like right now, he can read you as clear as a bright spring sky. Only instead of pastel blues, pinks, and yellows, you’re a stark monochrome of Pantone grey. Just as clear, but decidedly less alive. He hates it. Knowing just how vibrant of a person you once were. When Yejun left your life, so, too, did the color, it seems. Leeched away with the slow death of your husband. It’s a cruel fate, Taehyung has decided, and it’s one you never deserved. Yejun also knew this. He saw this in the way you mourned at his bedside, even before he was gone. It’s why Yejun made Taehyung promise to take care of you, to never let you forget how to smile.

As more time passes, Taehyung isn’t sure whether or not he’s done a good job by Yejun’s request. Not when the dark circles around your eyes seem to get more permanent every time Taehyung sees you. It’s why he brought the letter—the next letter. He’s curious if you remember the first one, the one that came the day of Yejun’s funeral; the one that had you crawling into Taehyung’s arms for the first time, seeking the comfort you knew was there.

That’s happened a few times in the two years since Yejun now. Any time you begin to fray at the edges and unravel a bit too quickly, Taehyung’s been there, weaving you back together the best he can. It might not be pretty, but a patchwork quilt is better than shredded rags, he likes to think. He hopes, at least.

“Are you warm enough?” Taehyung asks, realizing your arm is trembling around his. The jacket you’re wearing is far too thin, meant more for warding off spring rain showers than winter chills. Your lips are formed into a thin, bloodless line as if you’re trying to keep your teeth from chattering, and your brow is pinched.

The lift of your shoulder is subtle, dismissive and nonchalant. “I’m okay.”

“No, you’re not. Here,” Taehyung insists, pulling you to a halt on the walking path. “Take this.” He shrugs out of his jacket, draping it over the thinner trench you’re wearing over your sweater. You instantly relax, a soft sigh misting the air in front of your mouth.

“Thank you. I forget how cold it gets out here at night,” you mumble, encouraging Taehyung to continue walking toward the entrance to the columbarium, where Yejun’s memorial awaits. “Are you sure you’ll be okay without it?” Your eyes are round and glassy when you look up at him, the moonlight overhead reflecting in their depths.

The thick sweater Taehyung has on paired with his wool scarf is enough to stave off the wintery bite, but what warms him the most is seeing your eyes flash with a brief flicker of life when you snuggle into the depths of his jacket, bringing the tweed collar up around your neck after he assures you he’s fine without it.

Your feet shuffle, your stride slowing as you approach the columbarium. Taehyung can feel your hesitancy. The air around you is suffocating and full of static, something Taehyung wants desperately to help dispel.

“Come on. Together.” Taehyung offers you his hand, splaying his fingers wide in invitation. You lick your lips, eyes flicking between Taehyung’s face and his offered hand. Finally, you sag a little and slip your fingers in between his.

Your hand is soft and delicate in his. Taehyung has always admired your ability as an artist, being able to take your hands and a simple tool like a paintbrush and create something profound and breathtaking. Some might argue that what Taehyung does is also a form of art, but he swears it’s nothing compared to the pure magic you create. He’s found himself under your spell more than once, entranced by your art.

Even the works you’ve created in the last two years, the things you keep hidden away in your studio, are still quite beautiful—if more haunted. Taehyung knows you’re not selling any art and you haven’t hosted a gallery night in almost three years now. The few times he’s been inside your studio since Yejun, you’ve indulged his curiosity and let him look at the things you’ve worked on.

Taehyung cherishes those private moments you allow him within your space. He uses them as a time to reflect on what life has brought to you and to him. You have a shared experience of losing someone, but it’s clear you’re both working through your pain differently. Your studio, once a bright and vibrant space filled with inspiration and captured moments of love, is now more of a tomb, silent and full of the whisper of death.

Taehyung eases open the door to the columbarium. The motion-activated lights within flicker on and fill the space with a soft yellow glow. It’s better than the typical fluorescent white lights they used to use. Taehyung thinks the bright, sterile lighting is far too reminiscent of a morgue or hospital, not exactly places people should be reminded of when coming to visit their dead loved ones. So, he suggested the change when he took over doing the gardening for the cemetery.

Yejun’s niche is towards the back of the space, near the bottom. You separate yourself from Taehyung, letting the bundle of flowers droop upside down in your hand as you step lightly across the floor. You look like a specter, gliding across holy ground in search of what’s keeping you tied to this plane of existence. In many ways, Taehyung thinks that’s precisely what is happening with you. You’re suspended in time, stuck in a limbo of heartache.

In the two years since Yejun, you haven’t been able to move on, even though that’s exactly what Yejun wanted you to do. Yejun never wanted you to mourn him for long. He told Taehyung there was far too much love for you to give, and you had a heart big enough to love someone else while still holding true to Yejun. What Yejun failed to realize, Taehyung thinks, is that without Yejun, you didn’t want to love again.

Taehyung holds back a few steps, giving you some time to have a private moment as you kneel down in front of Yejun’s niche. The placard covering the niche is engraved with his name, birth and death dates, and a small metal frame that holds a glass engraved likeness of Yejun. It pains Taehyung to see the smiling face and crinkled eyes behind his wireframed glasses. Yejun was his brother in all ways, except for being born to the same parents. That didn’t matter to them, though—still doesn’t matter to Taehyung. They love—loved—each other just as fiercely as if they had been.

“Yejun,” you whimper his name, pressing a hand to the placard, head hanging low. Taehyung watches your shoulders shake with silent sobs, and he can’t take it anymore. He moves across the space and kneels down beside you, ignoring the cold that instantly leeches through the knees of his trousers. Before he can think better of it, he has his arms around you, trying to hold you together…trying to keep your seams from unraveling too fast.

Taehyung coos softly, murmuring as many words of encouragement and solace as can work past his quivering lips, “Shh, it’s okay. I’m here. It’s going to be okay. I promise. He loved you so fiercely. I miss him, too. I’m here for you. Shh, it’s going to be okay.” Over and over again, Taehyung repeats it like a mantra until your sniffles subside, and you slump into his arms, feebly returning his embrace.

Feeling your arms around him is a comfort, one that helps him keep his own tears in check. “Thank you for being here,” you sniff before burying your face in his scarf and inhaling deeply.

“I’m always going to be here for you,” Taehyung offers, smoothing a hand over your hair in what he hopes is a soothing fashion. He watched Yejun console you enough times to have a good idea of what might help. After Sujin was born, you battled postpartum depression for a while, and Taehyung helped wherever he could, giving him those brief glimpses into your emotional turmoil. Yejun always petted your hair and let you ground yourself in his embrace. He never even had to say a word; just let you draw on his strength. So, Taehyung has always tried to emulate that for you whenever you’ve needed him.

You sigh, and Taehyung reluctantly lets you pull away to sit back on your heels. “I’m such a mess. I’m sorry.”

“Hey,” Taehyung says, capturing the side of your face in one of his hands. You sway on your knees; big, round, red-rimmed eyes locked onto his. “Never apologize to me. You’re human, not a mess. Okay?”

“Okay,” you whisper, lips barely moving. You slowly turn, sitting with your back against Yejun’s niche.

“Okay,” Taehyung repeats, and settles in beside you. He barely notices the cold this time as it seeps through the seat of his pants. There are far too many fierce emotions rolling through him to be bothered by the chill.

“Is it okay if I read this now?” you ask after several moments of shared silence.

Taehyung looks over at you, fingering the small envelope attached to the bundle of fresh flowers he brought. He swallows past the thick knot in his throat, worried about you reading it but knowing you need to. Perhaps it’ll be best read when he’s around and not in the solitude of your apartment where you could fall apart without someone there to catch you; Taehyung knows Sujin is staying at your mother’s tonight.

He clears his throat. “Uh, sure, yeah.”

“They really are beautiful,” you say, voice so soft it barely carries to Taehyung. You admire the flowers for a moment, and the anxiety Taehyung had earlier in the shop when he was wrapping them goes away. He was worried that he got the flowers wrong. He knew Yejun always brought you fresh flowers, different types for different occasions. Yejun was all about the spiritual and emotional meaning of flowers, something that Taehyung hardly paid any mind to until after.

Finally, you tug the end of the string that attaches the envelope to the flowers, and you set them to the side. The flap is tucked into the envelope, so you slide it out and remove the tri-folded parchment from within. It looks the same as it did the day Yejun gave it to Taehyung a few weeks before he died. It’s the same as all the other letters waiting in a box under Taehyung’s bed—waiting for the right moment, waiting for you.

“If you need a moment—” Taehyung begins to say, but you hold up a hand to silence him. Slowly, you unfold the paper and smooth it over your thighs. Your eyes flick over the paper, snatching on random words until they hit the name signed at the bottom.

“What is this?” you whisper, yet your voice cuts like steel. “Is this a cruel joke?” You hold the paper up for Taehyung to see. At the top, it reads ‘For if you haven’t moved on’. Taehyung can understand why you might think so.

“N-no. It’s…there’s…” Taehyung pauses and takes a deep breath before trying again. “It’s not a joke. It’s from Yejun.” The look of hurt that ghosts across your face brings a prickling heat behind Taehyung's eyes, and he has to blink them several times to hold his emotions at bay as he explains. “The letter I gave you after the funeral?” He waits until you give him a subtle nod. “This is another he gave me…along with many others.”

“Many others?” you ask, incredulity seeping into your tone.

“He wanted to leave you something, something more than just your memories and heartache. So, he spent a few weeks, before he got bad, writing letters to you. He gave them to me and made me promise I’d give them to you when the time was right. This one—” Taehyung nods toward the letter held between your fingers “—was one I wasn’t sure if I’d have to give you or not. It was one Yejun specifically said to only give you if…well, if you hadn’t started living life again.”

“Hadn’t started living life again?” You balk at that, rearing back from him with an angry look pinching your face.

Taehyung feels like he’s botching this, not explaining it properly to you or something. “Just, just please read it.” Taehyung has no idea what the letter says. He never wanted to invade Yejun’s and your privacy. He’s hoping, though, that maybe the letter might hold some key information to help you understand…to help ease your anger in a way that Taehyung’s words can’t seem to.

You stare at Taehyung for a moment, and he’s certain you’re about to spit in his face and leave him sitting here alone. But, you finally shake your head and sigh, settling back into place and focusing on the paper. Taehyung is sorely tempted to try and read over your shoulder, but he doesn’t want to further your ire. So, he slides a few inches away, opening up a wide, cold gap between the two of you…and waits.

💔💔💔

To the love of my life,   For if you haven’t moved on Hi, baby. I hope this is a letter Tae never has to give you, but if you’re reading this, then that means we’re not doing so well. I say ‘we’, because I’m still there with you. Just like I promised in my other letter. I told Tae to use his discretion on whether to ever give you this or not. He knows you nearly as well as I do, so I trust him. So, if you ever read this, know he doesn’t mean any harm by it…I don’t mean any harm by it. But, baby, you gotta start living again. At this point, I don’t know how much time will have passed since I had to go away, but I do know you can’t let much more time pass. I need you to live, my love. Live for me, live for Sujin…live for yourself. No more standing by while the world continues to spin, you have to spin with it, baby, let it carry you away, and on to better days. Please. Find something that makes you laugh, find something that makes you smile…even if it’s a someone. I know you’ll always love me. There is no doubt about that. But, don’t let that love stop you from living. Let someone in, let someone help…love again, for me. Show the world that it can’t tear you down. Go on a date, go skydiving, go to one of those fancy art galleries in Italy you used to fantasize about…just go, baby. Go and do, and be free. Don’t be afraid…please, don’t be afraid to live. Love forever, Your Yejun

The memory of the other letter, albeit a bit fuzzy, drifts through your mind as you sit and try to come to terms with how you feel at this moment. You absently trace the neat scrawl of Yejun’s handwriting covering the page. Don’t be afraid. Are you afraid? Is that it? You’ve never thought of it like that, in terms of being afraid to live. But, if you think about it, you suppose that’s the root of it. You are afraid. Afraid of moving on. What if you do find happiness? What if you do find someone else? Yejun is clear that he’s confident you’ll never forget him, but what if you do?

You don’t want to be sitting somewhere thirty years from now, with your head thrown back, laughing at the joke from some other guy, with Yejun having not crossed your mind in years. It’s not that you don’t want to be happy. You just…you don’t know.

Taehyung is sitting so quietly beside you that if you closed your eyes, you’d think you were alone. Guilt pricks against your heart at how badly you first reacted, the harsh tone and words you lashed at Taehyung where he didn’t deserve it. You clear your throat, drawing the flicker of Taehyung’s eyes in your direction.

“I’m sorry, Tae. I really am. I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that.” The words are thick on your tongue as you work through the emotions threatening to obliterate your existence. You think you might cry, but give yourself an imaginary pat on the back when you manage to maintain eye contact with Taehyung while successfully blinking back the tears.

Taehyung is quiet for a moment, a muscle in his jaw working, flexing the dark stubble you can see shadowing along his jawline. It’s in this moment that you feel like you see Taehyung in a new light, with added clarity. He looks haggard, tired. You didn’t notice it before, the sunken circles around his eyes or the lack of a clean shave…until now. It’s not fair, you realize, that he has taken care of you so much the last two years when you haven’t even so much as bothered to check on how he is doing.

You’re just about to break the silence with another feeble apology when he smiles, it’s faint, but it’s there. “You don’t need to apologize to me. Yejun and I might have shared a different kind of bond than what you two had, but I have at least an inkling of the keen sting you’re feeling, the one that never quite goes away no matter what you do.” He brings a hand up and presses it to the center of his chest. “The one that slices a little deeper after the sun goes down and everyone else has gone about their lives.”

Chilled goosebumps pop up along your arms, despite the warmth from the added layer of Taehyung’s jacket. That is exactly what it feels like, a lingering sting that won’t go away, one that grows when you’re alone.

You lick your trembling lips, tearing your gaze away from his and focusing back on the letter clutched in your hand. “Yejun,” you whisper. “He—he wants…he wants me to move on.” A soft sob catches in your throat. “But, I can’t do that. How can I do that?”

Your shoulders heave as the emotions you were able to hold at bay before come crashing through the walls you managed to put up. It’s not like the weeping from earlier. That was simply the quiet cries of a mourning wife. This is bone-deep, soul-rending agony that shakes your entire body.

Taehyung pulls you into his arms, and you press your face into the cushioning of his scarf and scream. The sound is muffled, but you can still hear it echoing through the columbarium when all the air finally empties from your lungs. You try to replenish the air, sucking in stilted breaths, but it’s not enough. Panic ensues, your heart launching into a heavy, staccato rhythm as if trying to pound right out of your chest.

“Hey, hey,” Taehyung soothes. “Slow down. Try to breathe slowly.” He pulls you firmly into his lap. You’re heedless to the intimate position your body falls into with your knees on either side of his hips. All you care about is getting air into your lungs. Taehyung holds you by the face, angling yours so you look up into his worried eyes. “Come on, slow. In…out…like that, come on, another one. In and then out.” He breathes with you, exaggerating the way he inhales air through his nose and pushes it back out through his mouth.

His warm breath puffs across your face with each exhale, carrying with it the faintest sharp tinge of mint and the earthy tones of tea. Something that instantly makes you think of home. It helps bring you back to reality, slowing your rampaging heart, and subsiding your shuddering cries.

“I can’t do it,” you mumble.

“You can. You’re stronger than you give yourself credit for.”

“No, no. You don’t—I can’t. It’s…it’s cold in here,” you whisper, pressing a trembling hand over your heart. “No one wants that.”

A soft, sad smile forms on Taehyung’s face as he continues to stare down at you. “Good thing that I know a thing or two about keeping things warm.” He drops his hands from your face and grabs the lapels of his jacket that’s still draped over your shoulders and gives it a tug, pulling it tighter around you. You can’t help but smile, even if it’s a watery one.

“What would I do without you?” you ask, not expecting Taehyung to answer.

“You’d make it.” He sounds so sure. “I know you would, you’d do it. But, I am glad to be here, to help however I can.”

Taehyung doesn’t urge you off of his lap, just allows you to rest there with your cheek pressed over his softly beating heart, finding whatever comfort you can from the proximity of another source of warmth. His words linger there, filling the space between you with a comfortability that you know you’ll never find anywhere else. You don’t say anything else, as there isn’t much else to say. At least, not words you think you could say out loud. Not here, not now.

But, an hour later, as you’re driving home, you decide to try. So, you do something you haven’t done in a while and turn on the radio, letting the music fill the silence from before. It’s a small step, but a step nonetheless; the first of—you hope—many.

The next morning, with the light of a new day spilling through the gap between your bedroom curtains, you decide you feel…good. As you lay in bed last night, full of revelations about how you’re going to start making steps toward Yejun’s desire for you to be happy again, worry began to set in. Worry over whether or not you can do this. Now, though, you feel decidedly different—light, in a way—as you push back the blankets and climb out of bed.

With your mom having taken Sujin to school this morning, it afforded you some time to sleep in, which is something you haven’t done in years. You weren’t sure you were going to, considering how poorly you’ve been sleeping the last couple of years. It feels nice, stretching your arms over your head and not feeling as groggy for once.

There is one thing you want to do before heading to the studio, where you know you’ll probably just piddle around until it’s time to pick up Sujin, but it’s just baby steps for now. It’s not lost on you that your work, the art you create, no matter if you manage to move on or not, might still be something that you’re never able to recover. Yejun wasn’t far off when he joked about being your one true muse, but you try to remain hopeful that you can surprise yourself.

The box in the back of the closet is exactly where you left it almost two years ago. It holds some of your most treasured possessions. Things you’ve held on to dating back as far as your teen years and as recent as two years ago. You kneel in the bottom of your closet and slide the box out from behind the stack of empty shoe boxes you can’t seem to toss out.

It’s a bit faded, the blue exterior, once a brilliant navy, is now more denim in color. You’ve had the box since you were a child, given to you by your father the summer before he split from your mom. That really hurt your family, when he cut himself out of the picture without so much as an apology; he ran off with another woman. It was so hard for you to believe in love after that.

Lifting the small silvered latch, you ease open the box lid and sigh as your eyes land on the folded paper nestled on top. Yejun’s first letter. It’s the last thing you put in this box. The paper still feels crisp in your fingers as you delicately pluck it out and unfold it. You worry at your bottom lip a moment before letting your eyes devour the same words you read once before.

This time, they don’t hurt nearly as much. You still feel that piercing ache, but it’s accompanied by another, fresher feeling—one of hope. What stands out the most, now, though, is the confirmation that there are other letters waiting for you. Yejun says as much himself in this letter, you just hadn’t ever put the dots together, too distracted in your grief.

There are endless possibilities for what those other letters might be for. But, what’s clear is that you won't get another one until you do something to deserve it. Knowing Yejun, you have a few ideas of what those things might be. There is a thrill but also a sense of trepidation as you think about that. You want to move on and be happy again, and in doing so, you know you’ll get the other letters, but there’s also that sense of overwhelming dread.

Where do you begin?

You spent most of your day rearranging and organizing supplies at the studio. But, now that the sun is beyond its zenith and casting longer shadows across your paint-marked studio floor, you feel like you’ve done nothing but waste time. You still haven’t decided where to begin with Yejun’s letters and you’re no closer to coming up with an idea for your next project either.

With frustration coloring your thoughts, you lock up and welcome the reprieve of going and picking Sujin up from school. That’s one part of your life that you do know up from down with.

As you pull through the pick up line, you don’t see Sujin anywhere out front. You spot Mrs. Min ushering a few students to their cars, her friendly face sporting a smile as she does so. Her eye catches yours and she holds up a hand, rushing over to your passenger side window.

“Hi!” she says when you roll it down. “So glad I caught you before you waited too long. Sujin volunteered to help Mr. Kim with his terrarium and it’s taking a bit longer than expected. He should be out in the next fifteen minutes or so, feel free to park in the teacher’s lot or you can wait here if you’d like.”

“Mrs. Min!” a rambunctious gaggle of students call her name, requesting her assistance.

She gives you an apologetic look. “Sorry, duty calls. He shouldn’t be too long!” she calls over her shoulder as she jogs towards the cluster of students beckoning her over. One of the kids has what appears to be a large diorama that they’re having a hard time carrying to their car, even with the assistance of their friends.

“Well, great,” you mumble to yourself, checking your rearview mirror and seeing a long line of cars waiting behind you.

Pulling ahead, you slip around the side of the school and pull into one of the empty teacher spots and cut the engine. You haven’t been inside the school since the parent-teacher meeting at the beginning of the year, so it wouldn’t hurt if you went inside now, it would give you a chance to peek into Sujin’s classrooms and see what he’s been up to. If it’s one thing he loves, it’s learning.

Mr. Kim and Mrs. Min have adjoining classrooms at the end of the hall for Sujin’s grade, a storage and supply closet connecting the two rooms. The door to Mrs. Min’s room is closed but the light is still on inside. You take a quick peek through the view window on the door and see colorful drawings and paper projects hanging on the wall, books scattered across a few tables, and a large container of art supplies opened on her desk. She teaches English, Reading, Art, and History while Namjoon covers Math and Science. 

The gym teacher, Mr. Jeon, startles you as he breezes through the double doors at the end of the hall that lead out to the playground. “Oh, hey! Sujin, your mom is here!” he calls, stepping back and propping the door open with the heel of his sneaker.

“Mom!” you hear Sujin’s voice sound from through the open door. “You gotta come see this!”

Mr. Jeon holds the door open for you, his face lit with a pleasant smile. “A future scientist, I’d bet,” Mr. Jeon stage-whispers as you pass him and that makes your own smile blossom further.

“What’s going on, buddy?” you ask, taking in the scene before you.

Namjoon is crouched down beside Sujin, helping him sort through a collection of rocks spread out on a sheet of plastic. There are dozens of them, all various shapes and colors.

Sujin excitedly points out a few of the large rocks. “These would be perfect to create a hiding space!” he loudly proclaims before turning his bright eyes up to you. “Mr. Kim is letting me help him choose the rocks to go into the terrarium. We’re going to get our very own class salamander! Isn’t that cool, Mom? A class dragon!”

A soft chuckle comes from Namjoon as he pivots on his heels and squints up at you, the sun catching on the thick-framed glasses that are slipping down his nose. “We had so much fun yesterday talking about the salamander that was brought into Mrs. Min’s class that I couldn’t resist. I’ve had this old aquarium sitting in my garage for years, it just seems perfect.”

“Wow, yeah, that’s really cool.”

“Sorry for keeping him,” Namjoon suddenly stands, shoving his hands in his pockets and looking contrite. “I didn’t realize the bell had rung until Jungkook said something.” He turns to Sujin who is happily stacking a few of the smaller rocks into a pile. “I think that’s all for today, Sujin. We’ll finish it up tomorrow during class.”

Sujin frowns, his warm brown eyes flicking to Namjoon. “Okay,” he sighs.

“I tell you what, for all your hard work today, how about I let you be creative director during assembly tomorrow? Does that sound okay?”

The frown is quickly replaced with another excited smile. Sujin gives a whoop of delight and slaps his hands together before dusting them off. “Thank you, Mr. Kim, that sounds amazing!”

Seeing the interaction between Namjoon and Sujin gives you an idea, one that you hope you won’t regret. “Go grab your backpack, buddy, I’ll meet you outside Mrs. Min’s room in a second.”

“Yes, ma’am!” Sujin pulls open the door and scampers through, his sneakers squeaking on the tiled floor as he skips down the hall.

“Thank you for that, Namjoon, really. He was so excited about what happened yesterday and now this? He’s been wanting a turtle for a year now, so this will be a good test on whether or not we should get one.”

Namjoon pulls one of his hands out of his pocket and grips the back of his neck as he smiles shyly, his cheeks pinking slightly. “He’s a great kid, loves to learn. Though, turtles are a bit more needy than salamanders. It would also depend on the type of turtle. The standard box turtles are…” Namjoon trails off, his brow pinching as he throws furtive glances your way. “Sorry, you didn’t ask for a science lesson.”

That makes you laugh, which seems to ease the awkward tension in Namjoon. “Sujin isn’t the only one that likes learning.” You don’t intend the words to sound flirty, but they come out that way and you can distinctly tell that Namjoon keys into that.

“Yeah?” he asks, the shyness leeching away by the second.

“Um, yeah. Er, well, I should—” you jerk your thumb over your shoulder toward the door “—Sujin is probably waiting.” 

“Oh, yeah, of course.” Namjoon sidesteps over the plastic sheet of rocks and fumbles with the door handle before yanking it open. “Have a good—”

“Are you free Friday night?” you blurt, wincing at the rudeness of interrupting him but knowing if you don’t ask now then you’ll lose your nerve.

“Friday?” he parrots back, eyes wide behind his glasses.

Panic slices through and you immediately want to take it back. “Sorry, that was—I didn’t, it’s not appropriate is it? I’m so sor—”

“I’m free,” he states, the words silencing your backpedaling.

“Oh.” Now that he’s confirmed, you’re not sure what else to say. It’s been so long since you’ve done this.

“Is there something you wanted to do?” Namjoon asks hesitantly, clearly picking up on your trepidation.

You swallow around the choking feeling in your throat, the one that’s ingrained with the idea that you’re still married and still madly in love with another man and this is akin to cheating. “Maybe dinner? Or a late coffee? Um, or…I’m sorry, it’s been so long since I’ve done this.”

Namjoon gives you an easy smile. “Dinner sounds great. Let’s say, seven?”

“Seven is good. How about that new pizza place that opened up near the park, do you know the one?”

“I’ve had my eye on that place for weeks! That sounds perfect.”

Are you really going on a date…with Sujin’s Science teacher? “Okay,” you say, chewing the inside of your cheek as you take a few steps down the hall. “Great.”

“Great,” Namjoon confirms with a smile, his deep dimples making an appearance. “See you then.”

All you can do is nod, not trusting yourself with any more words with the influx of emotions now swirling through you. Sujin bursts through Mrs. Min’s door, his backpack and lunchbox in tow.

“Let’s go!” he trumpets, thrusting his free hand into the air in a fist. “I’ve got some homework to do before I can work on my diagram for the terrarium!”

Namjoon’s soft chuckle carries to you from down the hall as you usher Sujin towards the exit. You can’t help casting one last glance behind you, taking in the way he’s lazily leaning against the doorframe of his classroom. He’s quite handsome, there’s no arguing that.

A giddy feeling adds itself to the uncertain emotions rolling through you. A fluttering in your tummy that you haven’t felt in over seven years. You can’t help but wonder, as you load Sujin into the car, if this is really what Yejun wants for you or are you making a mistake?

💔💔💔

Taehyung

It’s a weird sensation when you expect to feel one emotion but end up feeling another. That’s what Taehyung thinks anyway, as he reads the text message he received from you for the dozenth time. You have a date. With Namjoon.

Taehyung has never met the quirky Science teacher, but he’s heard plenty of stories about him from Sujin. Charming, educated, and completely and utterly perfect for you. And that should make Taehyung happy. Yet, all he can feel is mild annoyance when he thinks about Namjoon sitting across from you at a dinner table making you laugh and smile.

He wants to chalk it up to being overprotective in a brotherly sort of way, but Taehyung knows better. It’s no secret—well maybe it is to you—that Taehyung cares for you deeply. Even before Yejun, Taehyung always had a soft spot for his best friend’s wife. Something that he drunkenly confessed to Yejun once a few years ago. Yejun took it goodnaturedly, something that Taehyung still thinks about to this day, and simply told Taehyung he understood the attraction because hell, who could blame him?

They never talked about it again, until the day Yejun asked Taehyung to take care of you and Sujin—the day he was given a box of letters addressed to you. Yejun had given Taehyung a knowing smile and said something along the lines of fate knowing and that’s why Taehyung already had so much love for you.

He wasn’t sure, at first, if Yejun had ever shared Taehyung’s little secret with you. But, as time went on, it was clear that he hadn’t. That, or, so lost in your grief, you’ve been keenly uninterested in that prospect. But, now, you’re going on a date and Taehyung doesn’t know how to feel about it.

The twinge of jealousy in his chest doesn’t sit right with him. He has no right to feel this way. It’s just something that he can’t seem to shake, hasn’t been able to since you told him about it two days ago. So, instead of expressing that, he forces himself to try and share in your joy.

That’s great. Let me know when you’re home, I have something for you.

A letter perhaps??

Your eager reply makes him smile despite himself. If anything, that helps his mood to improve. The ‘first date’ letter is already sitting on his counter, waiting.

Perhaps. Now stop texting me and go have fun.

There is no reply to that. So, Taehyung waits patiently, phone in hand. Hours pass in a mindless, sluggish way. He’s far too wound up to do anything productive but also has nervous energy that needs to be released. So, Taehyung spends the four hours it takes for you to finally respond by squeaking out haphazard notes on the alto saxophone he’s taken to trying to learn to play.

His phone lights up where it sits on the coffee table and he nearly drops the instrument in his haste to snatch up the device.

I’m home.

That’s all it says and it makes Taehyung frown. Not that he expected you to tell him how the date went over text message, but he was anticipating something more than just those two words. He is startled to realize just how late it is, though, being past eleven already.

Is it too late? I can always just swing by tomorrow.

Sujin is staying with mom. It’s not too late.

Taehyung is contemplating his reply when another text from you pops up that makes him drop everything else and grab his car keys, not caring it’ll be close to midnight by the time he pulls up outside your apartment. It was a knee-jerk reaction to also grab the letter that was sitting beside his keys, but now he’s thinking about whether or not it’s a good idea.

Those thoughts quickly fade as he focuses on the road, intent on reaching your apartment in record time. His phone sits on the passenger seat, still open to your text thread, the single word might as well be an alarm blaring to Taehyung, urging him on faster.

Please.

💔💔💔

As soon as you send the last text message you want to take it back. Not only do you feel whiny, but you know Taehyung will drop everything and come over which makes you feel terrible and like you’re using him.

But, fuck. The date was so horrible all you want to do is crawl into familiar, comforting arms and cry yourself to sleep. You’re about to pour your third glass of wine when there is a sudden knock on the door, followed by it swinging open. Taehyung stands there with your spare key in his hand, eyes wide with concern.

“Are you okay?” he asks, breathless as he clearly sprinted up the stairs to get here and now you feel infinitely worse for it.

You shake your head which earns you a pained sound from Taehyung but you hold up your hand, silencing him. “I’m not shaking my head no as in no I’m not fine, it’s more a I’m such a fool head shake. I’m sorry, Tae. I’m fine. I shouldn’t have said anything, I just—”

“I’m glad you said something. What happened? Do I need to go pay a certain science teacher a visit?” For all his bravado, you know he wouldn’t hesitate if you said yes.

“No, no. It’s not his fault. Well, not entirely. Look, I’m sorry you drove all the way over here.” You discard the empty wine glass in favor of taking a large glug directly from the bottle.

“Hey, hey,” Taehyung says, deftly taking the bottle from your hands before you have the chance to take a second gulp from it. “Stop apologizing and tell me what’s wrong.”

“It was a fucking disaster.”

If Taehyung is surprised by your cussing, he doesn’t show it. Instead, he stills beside you, brow slowly pinching and forming deep furrows between them. “Did he hurt you?” he whispers, but his tone is cold and hard. “I’ll kill him.”

“What? What, oh no, Tae, no. He didn’t hurt me, god no.” You sigh, propping your hip against the lip of the counter and wrapping your arms around your middle. “He was lovely, actually. I was the disaster. Or maybe we were. I don’t know, it was just a terrible night. A terrible idea.”

“Talk to me about it,” Taehyung encourages, his hands landing lightly on your shoulders to steer you toward the couch in the living room.

So, you spend the next hour recounting all the horrid details for him. Everything from the way Namjoon wouldn’t stop talking about rocks and mineralized dirt to the way he tried to kiss you at the end of the night only for you to duck and him to lose his balance, effectively making him face plant into the brick wall of your apartment building.

“See, it was a terrible idea,” you lament, letting out a frustrated sigh.

Taehyung hums softly. “It doesn’t sound like a complete disaster to me. Namjoon was polite, even if he did nothing but talk about his own interests. Did you try changing the subject, or did he ask about you and you gave a dismissive answer?” You give Taehyung an annoyed look. “I’m just saying, you have the tendency to avoid things like that. So, it’s only meant as a means to try and understand. Maybe it can be better next time.”

“There won’t be a next time.” You throw up your hands in defeat. “He said he had a lovely time, but I could see it plain on his face, he was just trying to be nice. He left with a bloody napkin pressed against his mouth for crying out loud!”

“Well, maybe he really—”

“But, most of all,” you continue, speaking over Taehyung, “I didn’t have a good time. I don’t want to do it again. It didn’t make me happy.”

That seems to subdue Taehyung. “Oh,” he says, nodding slowly. “Well, okay, that’s different.”

“I’m broken, defective.”

Taehyung scoffs, giving you a withering look a moment before dragging you into his arms, squeezing you tightly. “You’re not defective. You’re human. All this proves is that maybe the science teacher isn’t the guy for you. Simply just a lack of…chemistry.”

You can’t help but laugh at his bad joke. “You’re terrible,” you say in a lighter tone, meant to tease more than chastise. “But, you’re right, I guess. I just…this was the first date I’ve been on in a long time and it all went so horribly. It’s hard not to think that I somehow messed up, that I’m just…not right, just broken, y’know?” Taehyung’s eyes are soft as you look up at him, trying hard not to let yourself grow too accustomed to the comforting feel of his arms around your shoulders.

“You are perfect, most certainly not broken,” he whispers. You watch from beneath your lashes as a small crease etches across his forehead and you can tell he’s warring with himself over something before he slowly presses a soft kiss against the side of your head. “You just have to give yourself grace. I’m proud of you.” As he says that last part, he gently pulls back, hands resting on your shoulders. His right hand trails down your arm and you feel the soft caress of paper against the back of your hand. “Yejun would be proud of you, too, taking as big of a step as you have, I just know it.”

The envelope is small, but you instantly recognize the shape and feel of the paper. It’s just like the one you got earlier this week—like the one from two years ago. “Should I wait to read it?” you ask, not really expecting an answer.

“I’ll leave if you’d like some privacy.”

And in that moment you realize that’s the last thing you want. “No, please stay. Umm, that is, unless you have something to do.” It’s after midnight, the sour twist of jealousy rears as you think of everything that could possibly take Taehyung away at this hour. You tamp it down, knowing you have no right to keep him here, regardless. “I’m okay, I promise.”

Taehyung’s lip twitches as you wait for him to answer. He shakes his head. “No, I have nothing else to do. I can’t promise I won’t end up crashing on your couch, though,” he says, stifling a yawn in his elbow before lacing his fingers behind his head and stretching out. “I’m here as long as you need me.”

“Thank you,” you whisper, grabbing a blanket from the back of the couch and spreading it out over Taehyung’s legs before curling up on the opposite end of the couch. Taehyung shifts around the blanket with his feet, making sure the other end covers your legs as well.

“Don’t have to thank me,” he sighs sleepily. “I just want to make you happy.”

You’re not sure if he misspoke, because surely he meant only that he wants to see you happy. Because, as it is, him saying he wants to make you happy…well, that does something funny to you. Though, you can probably blame that on the terrible date with Namjoon or the half a bottle of wine you drank. Either way, you can’t help but smile as you look at Taehyung laying on the other end of your couch, eyes closed, and chest rising and falling with deep, even breathing.

You take a moment, running back over the date with Namjoon in your head, fingers idly moving along the edge of the envelope. It started out so nicely, Namjoon standing outside your apartment with a bouquet of flowers. They made your nose itch and your eyes water a bit from how overly fragrant they were—clearly some mass grown clippings from a supermarket—but you smiled anyway, appreciating the gesture.

Dinner was lovely, the new restaurant proving to be worth the drive and money spent. It’s perhaps your own fault for thinking Namjoon might pay for the meal and it didn’t hurt you any to pay for your own, but it felt oddly…impersonal? Less like a date and more like a business meeting or something. You’re not too old to be naive in the sense that women are just as capable of paying for dinner as men, as well as the fact that men shouldn’t hold the complete burden of expense on dates. It’s just…it was unusual and he didn’t even bring it up, simply told the waiter to split the check before it was brought.

It’s not helped by the fact that Namjoon wouldn’t stop talking about work or soil deposits. And perhaps Taehyung was at least half right in the fact that you didn’t put forth a lot of effort to change the subject, but the way you see it, if Namjoon was interested in knowing about you, he would have asked. Though, is that expecting too much? Are you being too harsh? Maybe you’re projecting and Namjoon really wasn’t that bad.

Before you can continue to spiral any further, you force your thoughts to the letter in your hand. Hoping it’ll put your ill heart at ease, you extract the folded parchment and smooth it out.

To the love of my life,             For after your first date Hi, baby. First, I want to say that I love you. Second, I hope he at least made you smile. If he didn’t bring you flowers or even those cheap ones from the supermarket, don’t think too much of it. I’ll let you in on a little guy secret, not all of us are well versed on flora and even less so on women. Even if it didn’t go so well, though I hope it did, you can’t give up. Go on another date, with the same person or someone else, you just can’t stop now. Take as many adventures as you can, do something spontaneous. You never did take that dance class you wanted to a few years ago. Paint, travel, explore the world. Take Sujin to places we never got to go. Just don’t stop, keep turning, even if it’s slowly. I’m so proud of you, you know? No matter what, I know you’re going to be okay. You’re going to make it. I can’t wait to see all you do. You’re going to be wonderful. You’re amazing, keep shining, baby. I love you so much. Forever With You, Your Yejun

Tucking the letter against your heart, you snuggle down in the couch, mind racing. You feel lighter somehow, like Yejun’s words have given you far more affirmation than you thought possible. The terrible date doesn’t seem so disastrous now.

“You okay?”

You startle at the soft question, thinking Taehyung was fast asleep. His eyes are barely cracked open, peering at you over his bent, blanket-covered knees.

“Mm, yeah. I think so,” you say after clearing your throat.

“Good…good,” Taehyung murmurs, his eyes falling shut once more.

“Hey, Tae?”

“Hmm?” His eyebrows raise but he doesn’t open his eyes. You take a moment to truly see him, the soft light from the stand lamp on the other side of the room illuminating him in profile. The soft curve of his cheek, the delicate slope of his nose, and the pouty bow of his lips aren’t new features, but you’re not sure you’ve ever truly paid attention to how breathtakingly handsome he is.

“Will you help me?”

Taehyung’s lips twitch as a mild frown turns down his lips. “Help you?”

“With whatever comes next.”

“Whatever you need, I’m yours,” he mumbles, a soft smile replacing his frown. You watch him for a moment longer, his lips going even softer as the smile fades with sleep. His chest rises and falls, your eyes tracking the motion in the dim lighting until you feel the pull of sleep yourself. Taehyung is the last thing you see before you close your eyes, and for the first time in over two years, you sleep peacefully; with a subtle warmth blooming in your chest where once there was only cold.

Next Chapter⇾ (coming soon!) ◅ Back to story masterlist  

◅ Back to Main Master List ©️ 2024-03-18 ColorMePurplex2

[gothlcsan]

Good Boy ; JEONG YUNHO

PAIRING sub!yunho , dom afab!reader

GENRE 18+ smut

SYNOPSIS Yunho is a sophomore in college, frequently stressed out by his younger brother, Yejun. He comes home to a living room full of freshmen and one happens to catch his eye, you.

WORD COUNT 4106

WARNINGS puppy play, masturbation, dom!reader, sub!yunho, overstimulation, nipple play, degradation, rough sex, penetration (strap), unprotected sex (no mention of protection), voyeurism, face smacking, blowjob, biting and kissing

♫ death wish - role model

a/n day ten of kinktober ! i know i said i wouldn’t repeat idols but .. he’s my ult and makes me sick and twirl my hair. > < so, let me pass this one time.. if you enjoyed please consider liking and reblogging! thank you. ♡ ～（ゝ。∂)

“Yejun, you cannot be serious right now.”

Yunho is the oldest out of two sons which comes with its own set of responsibilities and this moment was a perfect example of those unspoken responsibilities. He stares in horror, his younger brother surrounded by his friends with snack wrappers everywhere on the floor, empty bottles of soju dripping onto the table. His brother, Yejun, smiles at him gesturing towards with an already emptied soju bottle.

“Do you mind getting me another?”

Yunho yanks it out of his hand and slams it down onto the table, yelling at them to get up, clean their mess and leave. Yejun whines that it’s not fair but is quickly silenced once he catches his older brother’s expression, instantly sobering up and running to sort their trash. It was midterm season and an already stressed Yunho wanted nothing more than to just go home, hide in his room, and relax. He wasn’t expecting to unlock the front door and be met with his brother and his group of friends piled around the tv playing games.

Once the living room was cleaned and reorganized he had calmed down enough to agree to let Yejun’s friends stay but under the conditions they had to leave before he woke up. He didn’t have anything against them nor disliked them, he just knew they were going to be extremely loud and he wouldn’t be able to relax. Sighing, Yunho turns to finally head to his room but stops as he hears his brother call his name, turning back around, raising an eyebrow.

“Did you not bring your boyfriend with you today? I was hoping you would have so I could show these idiots on how to actually play this game.”

Yunho blinks before sighing with his hand pressed firmly against his forehead.

“Yejun, for the millionth time, Mingi and I aren’t dating and unlike you, he does more than game so he couldn’t come over today.” Yunho walks away entering his room but not before shaking from a shiver running up his spine swearing that the younger freshman sitting next to Yejun was staring into his soul.

For the following week, Yunho becomes aware of the freshman. She was the newest addition of his brother’s friend group, the silent type but clearly had a staring problem Yunho concluded. They ran into each other here and there, especially at home, you walking in on Yunho getting changed in the bathroom, both blushing and yelling apologies at each other. Exchanging numbers in case you needed anything from Yejun, Yunho wondered why you wouldn’t just text his brother but you were attractive and he wasn’t opposed to receiving texts from you.

Days go by without incident, finally seeming to go back to normal until Yunho sees his brother's friends again, being a day before their college exams, Yunho tiredly trudging into his bedroom not stopping once to say hi to anyone. He knew he had to study but he couldn’t get the motivation to, falling face first into bed as he allowed his eyelids to shut.

He’s restless, not being able to relax nor sleep from the loud chaos coming from the living room, Yunho huffs in irritation and turns to lay on his back, biting his lip as he takes his cock out. Moaning involuntarily behind his hand, he begins to stroke himself slowly. Stress melted from his body as he squeezed his eyes shut tight, no longer holding his moans back by much, rocking his hips to meet flush with his hand. Yunho shakes as he stops mid stroke knowing rubbing one off wouldn’t be enough, opening the drawer of his nightstand to grab his wand, body shaking at the expected pleasure from just turning it on, the vibrations making his stomach tighten.

Placing the wand directly onto the head of his cock, Yunho squeaks and moves it away, he was more sensitive than he imagined. He plays with the settings before he’s lost in his own pleasure, head hanging to the side with drool on his cheek, wand pressed against his cock, two fingers working his hole. Moans fall from his lips, panting as he feels his stomach tighten and thighs shake. Yunho doesn’t realize how loud he’s being, fingers desperately working to help chase his high, wand pressed against his groin as he goes back to stroking himself, using his precum to lube himself to jerk off faster. His head was in the clouds, chest rising and falling quickly as he pants with each stroke. He knew he was going to break, a third finger being more than enough for Yunho to cry out and cum onto his chest, the wand making him shake from the overstimulation.

It’s minutes of laying still and catching his breath before he’s sitting up and grabbing a tissue off his desk, cleaning himself up. It’s a couple minutes later when he realizes his door in fact did not shut entirely behind him when he came in, fear sinking into Yunho’s stomach. Has anyone heard him?

Yunho waits roughly thirty minutes before he opens his door further, poking his head out and looking both ways, darting to the bathroom. He properly cleans himself up, giving himself a pep talk before walking quietly into the kitchen, grabbing a water from the fridge; jumping out of his skin when he closes the door and turns to go back to his room, coming face to face with you.

“Can I help you?” Yunho asks with uncertainty, confused on why you were standing there. You point over his shoulder behind him towards the fridge, moving past Yunho.

“I was going to grab a snack if that’s okay with you, Yunho. It is, right?”

Yunho only responds with a quick nod, blush creeping up his neck. He couldn’t explain it but you made him feel embarrassed, even when he did normal day to day tasks. He watched quietly sipping from his water while you walked around the kitchen preparing snacks for your friends, turning around suddenly with a smirk on your lips.

“Do you need something, Yunho?”

Reality sets in for Yunho and he frantically shakes his head, leaving the room, not looking behind himself once until he slams his bedroom door behind him. A second wave of reality washes over him as he jumps into bed. Cursing at himself for getting flustered, hating himself for having a hardon for his brother’s best friend.

It has been months since their last awkward encounter, a few weeks since Yunho started purposely avoiding you. He’d stay busy in class all day, going out with Mingi and San at night just to hopefully avoid running into you. He hated how bothered he was by you, he hated more the idea of admitting he could possibly have a thing for the younger, an internal battle he didn’t want to face yet. Their last real interaction being the thing that set this new daily routine of avoiding you. He wasn’t expecting to come home from a late night of studying at the library, turning the corner to his bedroom as you walked out of the bathroom, towel wrapped tightly around your body. Yunho’s eyes widened along with his mouth as he quickly shut both and turned away to rest his head against his bedroom door.

“Oh, hi, Yunho.”

“I didn’t mean to look,” Yunho stumbles on his words, body frozen and burning up from embarrassment of gawking at you.

“It’s okay, Yunho. It’s your house so I’m sorry for freaking you out. I just got back with your brother from working out so I wanted to shower.”

Yunho opens his eyes and turns around, holding his breath as he struggles to keep eye contact. Your hair is wet allowing water droplets to fall and cascade down to your collarbones and exposed chest, causing Yunho’s cheeks to flare up from shyness.

“It’s ok, I just wasn’t expecting it, you look great. Sorry, I got to go. Study, I have to study.” Yunho opens his bedroom door, leaving you alone in the hallway before you even get a word in. Chuckling softly as you walk down the hallway into the guest bedroom thinking Yunho was the cutest thing on earth.

So, it wasn’t that much of a shock once Yunho started avoiding you more seriously, doing everything he could to ensure their paths wouldn’t cross. He felt awkward, staring at you and for the vulgar images he thought of while stroking himself. Yunho felt dirty and didn’t want to continue feeling as such so his brilliant course of action was to completely forget you ever existed. Which he failed at clearly and very quickly.

Once again, Yunho laid in bed with his hand covering his mouth as he moaned profusely as he stroked himself. Sweat beaded along his eyebrow as he continued to chase his high. His mind was in a haze, so caught up in his high he nearly screamed as you crossed his mind.

Why now?

Yunho felt disgusting but his hand continued to stroke himself, faster now, he didn’t want to acknowledge how hard he had gotten from the idea of the two of you having sex. Imagining how you would feel pinning him down, your lips exploring his skin and leaving open mouth kisses onto the skin on his inner thighs. He wanted to feel small against you (despite the respectable height difference), his body shaking as he slips from any reality where he was in control.

“Fuck, y/n, please,” Yunho groans with a whisper as he reaches his high, a jumble of swear words and moans falling from his lips as he came onto his hand. Turning his head and gasping when he sees you staring at him with wide eyes. Yunho scrambles to cover himself with a blanket, you quickly slamming the door and apologizing saying that you hadn’t seen anything - - that Yejun wanted him. He was doing so well at avoiding you and the one night he put his guard down, you just had to show up. He felt disgusted and that feeling left Yunho wanting to violently throw up.

He quickly cleans himself up and pushes past you to wash his hands, ignoring you entirely to go see his brother. He had decided that he was not going to allow himself to let you affect him anymore. Which, once again, he fails at miserably. The universe must hate him or you’re a literal devil, proven clear a few weeks later when Yunho is now staring at you in horror as the youngest is holding a pair of puppy ears and pointing at Yunho’s closet.

“I was looking for my brother’s jacket I let you borrow. I asked Yejun to ask you and he said to just grab it because you were with your boyfriend, I am so sorry.”

Yunho angrily snatched away the ears, grabbing the jacket off his desk chair, throwing it into your direction and told you to stop being so nosy, wanting you to get out. You quickly agree and start to make your way out of Yunho’s room, stopping once Yunho calls out your name in a soft tone.

“I don’t have a boyfriend.”

You only smile and nod, pointing at the ears in Yunho’s hand.

“So, you aren’t into pet play with him?”

Yunho turns into a dark shade of red, telling you to shut up and slams the door behind the younger, hearing you laugh all the way down the hallway. What a sinister prick, Yunho thought.

After their (Yunho’s) failed attempts at avoiding you, he gives up on that quest; the two of you rapidly get closer each day. The friendship was short -lived, only taking a month before they started dating. Yunho feels a lot less guilty stealing quick glances and thinking about you in his alone time. It’s not too long after when they revisit Yunho’s collection buried in the corner of his closet, Yunho embarrassingly explaining to you what pet play was, who laughed and nodded, saying you already knew what it was.

It didn’t take long before you were calling Yunho puppy.

Not that Yunho minded it, eating up every praise dished out to him.

You were always a very soft dom when it came to Yunho, it was something that Yunho admired but he wanted to see you get mad. So, he did everything he could think of to annoy you, not listening, acting oblivious to others flirting with him, laughing too hard at stranger’s jokes. This was quickly caught by you, who was now not only annoyed by your boyfriend acting out of character, but annoyed with Yunho's seemingly carefree attitude.

Once they get home, you seem awfully quiet, and Yunho starts to worry that he genuinely messed up and upset you, quietly following you to your shared bedroom. Yunho jumps as he feels an arm snake around his waist, bringing him down to sit on their lap, turning to stare at you. Excitement and fear crept in Yunho’s stomach, your face was unreadable and calm, too calm. Shivers running over his body as you worked. No words are spoken as you place a collar around Yunho’s neck, leash attached to the front, Silently moving him off your lap, placing him down onto the bed to retrieve the ears in the closet. You placed them onto the top of Yunho's head, adjusting them to sit perfectly. Firmly telling him to lift his arms, Yunho listening to these orders, biting his lip willst you lift off his shirt. He blushes profusely when you help him remove his jeans, sitting back onto the bed quietly watching as you take off your own shirt. Yunho dug his nails into his thighs as his eyes darted to yours. They're thick, pretty, Yunho wants to kiss them but he’s brought to you as you move to stand directly in front of him. You wrap the leash around your dominant hand, yanking on it, causing Yunho to slam down onto his knees, a gasp of air coming from the elder’s chest.

“Why can’t you be a good puppy? Answer me, Yunho.”

“I didn’t mean,” he’s silenced with a second yank on the leash, hissing as he slams chest first against your knees.

“Dogs don’t speak now do they?”

Yunho swallows nervously and barks. It’s deep, yet quiet which clearly isn’t what you wanted, eyebrows furrowed as you stand up and press the heel of your foot against Yunho’s lap.

“Again.”

Yunho barks until his throat hurts, you mockingly laughing as you feel him harden against your foot, precum soaking through his boxers.

You remove your foot and push Yunho backwards, shaking your head then squatting down in front of him, placing a hand under his chin, tilting Yunho’s head back to get a real good look into his eyes.

“You’re not trying too hard on being my favourite puppy, hm? Will I need to bring Yejun in here to show you how a real puppy acts?”

Yunho whines, sniffling as he shakes his head. He places his head onto the top of your knees and nuzzles the skin there, praying that you will forgive him for his actions. He knows that you and his brother never had anything past a platonic relationship, you using it to only rile Yunho up with his possessiveness.

“Sit up.”

Yunho springs up instantly and sits politely, resting his hands flat against his thighs as he waits for his next set of instructions. Watching closely as you walk around the room grabbing various things and placing them onto Yunho’s bed, his stomach burning red hot thinking of what you could possibly do to him.

“Up. Up, pup.”

Yunho crawls onto the bed, sitting politely on the edge on all fours, staring up at you who’s positioned yourself at the foot of the bed. Your eyes are dark, something that excited Yunho so much it sent shivers throughout his entire body. He sits obediently whilst you brush back the hair that sat on his face, responding to each touch with a hum.

“Do you remember what happens to puppies that talk back to their owners, pup?”

Yunho takes too long to answer, resulting in a sharp slap against his thighs, the cool leather whip leaving marks against them. He bites his lip knowing making any sort of noise would result in another hit. You ask again, Yunho scrambling for words that come out incoherently resulting in another hit. You demand him to strip off his boxers, wanting to see his thighs. The two of you continue to go back and forth for a few minutes, Yunho’s mind so blurred he can’t even think while you get fed up and grab him by the back of his hair, bringing his face towards your own, only being a mere few centimeters apart.

“Maybe this will help you remember, pup.”

Yunho’s eyes widen as his mouth is filled with your strap, tears stinging the corner of his eyes at the sensation. His throat burns as you rock your hips making Yunho take every inch of it, fingers tight around the puppy’s hair. It’s a delicious feeling that Yunho enjoys much more than he’d like to admit, gagging around the younger as his mind blurs even more. He reaches down to stroke himself, pin like needle sensations running through his hands from you striking him with the whip. It makes you pull out of Yunho’s mouth, the puppy whining at the sudden loss of fullness, looking up at you with a confused look.

“You can’t even listen for five minutes can you, ungrateful brat.” you hissed before grabbing Yunho’s cock into your hand, squeezing the head into harshly.

“It’s a shame you have a huge cock, you know? You can’t even use it properly.”

Yunho whines hungrily at your degrading words, fighting the urge to buck his hips up into the younger’s grip. You’re quick to notice the pup’s eagerness, chuckling, dropping your hold and slapping Yunho’s cock watching as the elder yelps. His ears are filled by your degrading words as he slips from any hold of reality he had before, begging for you to forgive him, begging to be touched. Leaning forward a bit, you duck down to kiss Yunho on the lips, not being able to suppress the laugh falling against said lips before landing another firm slap onto Yunho’s cock.

“Now the puppy wants to listen? You’re pathetic, Jeong Yunho.”

“Please,” is all Yunho could shakily muster out, tears running down his cheeks. His cock flushed red against his abdomen, begging to be touched. You pull Yunho towards yourself, bringing his legs to hang off the bed, then painfully slowly starts climbing onto Yunho’s lap.

“Master, please.” Yunho groans as he begs, panting at the closeness of their bodies makes him feel as if he’s on fire. Yet, you have none of it, telling him to be both quiet and be good. You shakily raise your hips and place your lube covered thighs around Yunho’s cock and press them firmly together, resulting in Yunho throwing his head back with a cry. The lewd, wet sounds of you moving your hips, thighs tight around Yunho’s cock made the elder squeeze the comforter between his fingers, body shaking like a leaf.

“Y/n-ah, please.”

Your body stiffens, looks down at Yunho with a glare, loosening your thighs and snaking a hand up to roughly grab Yunho by the throat.

“Who are you speaking to?”

Yunho apologizes quickly with tears pricking his eyes, trying to kiss the hand wrapped around his throat, not making it anywhere near close. Babbling on that you are his master, how he’s sorry for messing up, begging to be forgiven, You must’ve forgiven him because now you were shifting positions and lowering yourself to stand up off the bed. With a quick snap of your fingers, Yunho is sitting on top of you, his cock heavy on his abdomen, ears stained red from embarrassment.

Running your hands down Yunho's body, finding a home holding his thighs, Yunho groaning from the added pressure on his welts. He swallows hard as you speak to him as if he’s the dumbest person on earth, hands lifting him up and instructing Yunho to position himself prettily on the strap. You simply loved the way your much larger boyfriend looked and acted so small around you, pretty long limbs that turned limp as he melted from your fiery touch. Yunho whines as he slowly sinks himself onto your strap, clenching around the full feeling making you tilt your head back with a moan. Yunho loved how you praised him for being so good, acting as if you could feel every bit of it. Once he got used to the feeling, Yunho was rocking his hips, hands pressed against your chest as he bounced. The sound of skin slapping against skin made Yunho shiver, dipping his head down to hungrily kiss you, whining as you groped his ass, smacking one cheek. The soft jingling of the bell on Yunho’s collar was in beat with his hips, you growing impatient with Yunho’s pace, hooking a leg under his and flipping him over so that you could easily pin Yunho against the mattress.

“Let me teach you how to feel real good, pup,” you spoke softly in Yunho’s ear, kissing down from behind his ear to the center of his shoulder blades. Feeling Yunho shiver underneath you and whining from the teasing, you carefully realign the strap with Yunho’s hole before beginning to slowly push back into him.

“Master, please,” Yunho clenches the comforter between his fingers, looking over his shoulder to watch as you bottom out. He’s greedy, pushing his ass back to meet flush with your hips, who doesn’t accept Yunho’s actions. You’re quick to grab a fistful of Yunho’s pretty brown hair and yank it making him yelp and apologize instantly. It doesn’t do much good, you keeping a steady hand on Yunho’s hair while quickening your thrusts, the bells on Yunho’s collar and doggy ears filling out the room. Yunho babbles about how close he is, the comforter now clenched tight between his teeth, you only continuing to drill into Yunho. Poor pup could barely breathe from begging to cum, crying over how full he felt, how good you made him feel. You knew Yunho was close and fucked out, his glassy eyes full of tears and drool pooling in the space between his cheek and the comforter. His thighs quivering and sweat causing his hair to stick to his face. You couldn’t help but touch all of Yunho with exploring hands, encouraging your pretty pup to hold on a little longer, spanking the side of his thigh as Yunho shakes his head.

“You’ll do as I say, brat. Now, be a good puppy and wait until I tell you otherwise.”

You pull out, receiving a whine from Yunho, rolling him onto his back. Placing your hand against Yunho’s stomach, moving it down slowly before wrapping a hand around Yunho’s flushed red cock, Yunho screaming for permission to cum, hiccuping and crying. You stroke Yunho slowly before stopping to align yourself back into Yunho’s hole, hips snapping against Yunho's pretty thighs, telling the pup to beg louder and then maybe the heavens will hear his prayers.

“Master, please, please,” Yunho begged too fucked out to form complete sentences, tears staining his cheeks. You spank his thigh before leaving toward Yunho, whispering into his ear.

“Cum, you greedy pup.”

Yunho moans at your growling, deep voice, shivering as his body gives out and cums. However you’re not slowing your thrusts once until your own thighs quiver, sinking teeth into Yunho's shoulder when you lean down, cumming. Panting, the two of you fall onto the bed. You don't bother pulling out, cuddling Yunho from behind, letting the older boy warm the strap, kissing the back of Yunho’s neck and reassuring him that he did amazingly well. Love confessions getting lost between kisses and giggles. You finally pull out, smiling as Yunho moans, the boy giving you puppy eyes as he whines from feeling empty. Pressing kisses all over his face, telling him to let you clean up, Yunho pouting and grabbing you by the wrist. You’re a bit shocked by the sudden movement but fall into a bigger shock as Yunho presses your fingers against his now gaping hole, pouting with the biggest puppy eyes you’ve ever seen.

“Please, master, keep me full.”

And who would be the biggest idiot to tell this puppy no?

[mariabtsos]

If ||k.th||

Description: Welcome to the follow up to If Walls Could Talk! We will get a bit more back story with yn and Yejun and how this is affecting her feelings for Taehyung. This follows your date with Tae and after that, although you’ve been a little hot and cold with him after and he isn’t sure why. 

Genre: drabble, idol!Taehyung x f!reader, friends to lovers, semi-slow burn, fluff, angst.

Warnings: Past relationship trauma, fear of imperfection, mentions of insecurity about your relationship with Tae, miscommunication.

Word Count: 4.6k

You were so nervous it wasn’t even funny, you were rushing to find something to wear whilst a hyped up Matty tried jumping on you and licking you, was this even a good idea? You felt like a fish out of water and you truly didn’t understand, you were fine holding his hand yesterday, for fuck’s sake you were fine giving him a kiss on the cheek and inviting him over, why were you so nervous now? It totally could be that you haven’t been on a date since your break up with Yejun, and even then you couldn’t remember the last time he took you on one. You had asked him yourself to have a date day or night and he always rejected you, especially after you got Matty; he almost seemed bored or annoyed every time you would come up to him.

“Hey, that new escape room place opened up and they have a pretty cool room I think you’d like!” you remembered one of your many requests, and the way his eyes rolled so far you were scared they would get stuck.

“Okay? Can I go back to my alone time? I have more important things to do than talk about a new escape place or whatever,” his tone was so dismissive, you felt your heart shatter a little.

After that he had started getting upset, or mad at you. At first it was valid things, like you forgetting to check his pants for his AirPods and pens, leading to him having to spend money on new pants and new headphones, you should’ve checked his pants, you really should’ve, but you were used to him emptying his pockets when he got home, it wasn’t entirely your fault, Yejun called you stupid and silly for this, he apologized a few hours later.

You were taken out of your thoughts by the ring of your alarm: take out food from the oven.

You ran, taking out the lasagna you had worked all afternoon making, you wanted this to be a nice dinner, you wanted this date to go well. You wanted you and Taehyung to go well. After carefully grabbing the glass pan and placing it on your counter to cool, you ran back to your bedroom and finally picked an outfit; you kept it simple but pretty light blue summer dress, and fuzzy colorful socks. You decided to leave your hair the way it was since it looked okay enough, and then went into the kitchen to finish setting up.

The doorbell rang

You let the rest of the silverware down softly, whilst turning towards your door, taking a deep breath to try and calm yourself down, “coming!” you raised your voice, hoping he had heard you. You ran to the bathroom one more time to double check your appearance before walking toward the door, checking the camera and seeing Taehyung’s face almost made your heart falter. He was truly so incredibly handsome; his short military haircut had grown out significantly since you had first met, and his outfit was pretty, a simple, loose fitting, green knitted sweater and simple white dressy pants, his signature brown loafers enveloping his feet.

It was now or never, you needed to open the door now or he would start getting worried, or worse, maybe he’ll think you forgot.

Like always, it felt like years to Taehyung before you opened your door, even if he knew it hadn’t been more than two minutes. He couldn’t help it though, he’d spend all night after his bath and all day today thinking about this moment, about how it would be to have a date with you. He called his Hobi hyung and Jimin for advice, they were always the members whose outfits were the talk of their fans, so who better to dress him. They both came running, with a big bag of clothes Taehyung was very familiar with.

“Aren’t these clothes from our stylist noonas? Why do you have them?” He asked, concerned as he recognized his outfit from the BTS ROOM LIVE they had done for FESTA in 2021, “this outfit is from years ago, how did you find it?”

“We texted and asked for them, did you know they keep our clothes organized by month and year we wear them?” His soulmate stated as he hugged Taehyung.

“It puts me a bit at ease if I’m being honest, I’d hate for there to be no system,” Hoseok said, as he looked at the outfit Taehyung had grabbed. “I told you he’d go for that one, everyone loved him in that sweater,” He nudged Jimin’s shoulder.

Taehyung got himself ready, deciding to ultimately keep the sweater but change the pants to similar ones he already owned. His friends left by the time he had to knock on your door.

“You look beautiful,” he said once you opened the door, and he just knew he had the goofiest of grins on his face, which grew wider when he saw you smile, the slight tint on your cheeks not going unnoticed by him.

“Thank you,” you both stared at each other for a little while, both silently admiring the other until Matty’s bark got your attention, “come on in, you can take a seat anywhere you’d like,” you stepped aside, Taehyung gave you a small bow and walked in, taking off his shoes and placing them in the small shelves you had by your door. You walked off to your kitchen and Taehyung took a look around your apartment, it looked emptier than the last time he’d been here a few weeks back.

Yejun must’ve been here to pick up his stuff.

It looked like you had moved a few things around, to adjust to the extra space, it looked good, very much your style rather than two styles combined. He finally decided to sit at one of the stools by your kitchen island, it’d save moving around since he assumed you would eat here. “I like what you’ve done with the place! It looks great,” he smiled at you as he watched you pour something into a wine cup, “thank you! And don’t worry about this it’s alcohol free cider,” you smiled whilst sliding the cup toward him.

You started serving dinner to ensure the lasagna wouldn’t be too cold that you’d have to reheat it later, you wouldn’t have mind it if it was just you, but since you had Taehyung there the last thing you wanted was to give him a plate of cold lasagna. “This looks and smells amazing!” He said, waiting for you to sit down to start eating.

“Thank you, I wanted to make sure it was good for you, I’m sure you’re used to quality food,” you stated shyly, as you finally took a seat and started cutting into your food. 

“Well, I’m sure we’ll both like it! And anything you make will be great,” he cut into his food as well, and brought a big piece into his mouth, you looked at him nervously, and held the piece you had cut just shy of your mouth whilst you watched him chew, his eyes widened and he let out a delectable low moan that sent shiver down your spine, and if it weren’t for the cute way he was chewing, you would probably be hot and bothered just from that.

“This is amazing Ynie, when you meet my members you HAVE to make this, they’ll all love it!”

His words made you blush; he was so sweet and kind and encouraging, it truly hit you now what was happening. You had talked about it with your therapist, about you and Taehyung — although you hadn’t mentioned his full name, just because he had told you all about people they trusted running their mouths with information before — how you were scared of how he treated you because that was how Yejun treated you at first, you were scared that there was a catch, especially with him being such a public figure.

“Well, these are completely valid feelings for you to have, especially given the kind of relationship you are coming from,” she validated you, “but, you have to try and not let your previous experiences shape the way you see every single relationship you have moving forward, yes be careful and be vigilant of the red flags, but use what you know to determine whether or not it is worth pursuing.”

Taehyung had offered to clean your dishes, it was something sweet that you hadn’t experienced the last few months, mainly because you usually ate alone even though you were with someone, your current topic of conversation was you telling him all about growing up in your home country, all the different foods you got to have and how he should definitely try some of them one day. “Maybe you could show me how to make them!” he sounded excited, “is there any Korean food you haven’t gotten to try since being here?” he asked you, trying to further the conversation as he placed the last dish onto the drying rack.

“Umm, well, I’ve tried pretty much everything but Korean corn dogs, I’ve been dying to have one but I just haven’t gotten around to it,” you explained, and he seemed slightly shocked. “Oh I’m definitely taking you to my favorite street food cart, the lady that works there loves me,” he stated proudly as he walked back toward you. He stood rather than sat, one arm was on the counter while the other held the back of the stool, keeping you close in a way that made your heartbeat accelerate.

“Everyone does Tae, if anyone doesn’t like you that’d be the biggest red flag,” you giggled, doing your best to keep your eyes on his and not on his pretty pink lips.

“Do you?” he asked, his face getting a little closer, making obvious that his eyes were going back and forth between your lips and your eyes.

You really wanted to say yes, out loud, but words seemed to fail you, and all you could do was give him a short peck. Taehyung felt like he was soaring after, he wondered if he jumped out of the window if he would fly? He probably wouldn’t, but he could dream. Just as quick as you had kissed him you moved away, walking toward your living room, and to say he was slightly confused was an understatement.

“I’m sorry, did I make you uncomfortable? I can leave if this was too soon or anything…” he rambled on as he followed you, suddenly feeling stupid.

You stopped and faced him, he could tell you had a mental battle going on inside your head from the way you stared at him, he wanted to know so badly what was wrong, what he did and how he could make it better, how he could do right by you. 

“I'm sorry Tae, I really want…” you took a deep breath, your eyes looked so “I had a really great time today, I just need some space, I want things to go right.” 

Taehyung nodded, turning on his heel to head toward your door.

“Just…text me whenever you want to talk about this okay? No pressure!” he smiled, he hoped it came off as sincere as he wanted it to, you nodded and walked to the door to say goodbye, not wanting him to think that he did something wrong, you wrapped your arms around his torso and buried your head in his chest, he hugged you back tightly, leaving a small kiss on your hair.

I really want to try things with you.

Those were the words you had wanted to say.

Taehyung decided he would let you be the first to reach out, all within reason of course, if more than a week passed and he hadn't heard from you he would definitely reach out and make sure you were good.

He wondered why your flirtatious mood you'd held the day before and all night last night had changed so drastically, so suddenly. He tried his best not to blame himself but he couldn't help but feel like he'd been moving too fast, especially since you'd been through a break up a month or so ago. He decided to follow your emotional cues and just go slow.

It had taken you a few days at first but he did end up receiving a text from you, which he'd been overly excited about, much to his own embarrassment. It was simple, an apology for your behavior and for seeming rude, Taehyung wasted no time in shutting down any insecurity you may feel.

You had every right to act that way!

I should be apologizing for being so forward.

You didn't respond for a little while, he figured you were with a student right now so he didn't worry too much, you'd answer when you were able. He went about most of his day unfazed, just having fun with his brothers. He was watching Hoseok rehearse when his phone dinged with a new text from you.

“Oh how quickly you abandon me Taehyung-ah” his hyung dramatically placed his hand on his forehead, causing the younger to cackle and roll his eyes, Hobi was something else.

I know, I just…

I don't want you to think I don't like you or that you inconvenienced me anyway.

You didn't Ynie, I promise, you've been going through a lot :) 

How about we take it slow, just talking in the hallway like we do and if you ever feel up to another date, you can ask me and that way you don't have to feel pressure to say yes :)

He bit his lip as he waited for your response, he noticed Hobi had sat down next to him and had read Taehyung’s last text. “I'm proud of you Tae,” was all he said, and it made Taehyung’s chest fill with happiness. He wanted to do right by his brothers, by his family, by his grandmother, by you. He smiled brightly at his hyung before looking back down at his phone, seeing you were typing; the text bubble appeared and his smile got bigger if that was possible.

I can do that :)

Would we still be on for our jam sessions?

“Jam sessions? So that’s why your playlist has expanded so much!”

“Yeah, she's got some all over the place taste,” Taehyung chuckled, looking down at the small device again, a simple for sure! Being all that was needed.

You went back to your old routine after that, catching Taehyung in the mornings before work, sometimes he'd join you for a morning run if it was dark enough, or sometimes you would just talk for a good 20 minutes before he had to go.

He really had been so patient with you, it had been three months since your first date, although you hoped to get a redo where you wouldn't reject Taehyung the way you had done that night. You tried to express this through the songs you'd play whilst bathing every night, you weren't sure if he took a bath every night or not, but you were determined for him to hear at least some of them. Your taste in music was very western heavy, and you had a knack for nostalgia so you often played older songs, from bands you liked when you were a teen, the two you played most often were R5 and 5SOS.

You were taken out of your thoughts by your alarm, letting you know to take out Matty's birthday cake, today was his first birthday, you'd been tempted to invite Taehyung and Tannie over, but you felt you still needed a little more time, so you resorted to celebrating your dog by yourself, cutting the cake — which ended up being WAY bigger than what you had expected — in a nice half. You placed Matty's piece down once you took out the candle and replaced it with a treat, setting inside of the spare room of your apartment which had become Matty's room, and then put the other half on a plate to take to Tae's apartment for Tannie.

Once you left your apartment and made the quick trip to Tae's door, you placed the plate down with a little note, rang the doorbell and went back to your home, you hadn't closes the baby gate at Matty's door and the last thing you needed was for him to make a cakey mess on your floors.

When Taehyung came out to his door you had just clicked yours shut, it didn't take him long to realize the cake was from you, he took it into his apartment and quickly shut the door, calling his small pomeranian over as he read your note.

Thank you for being so patient with me, I wanted to know if you were wanting to go out for a Korean corn dog and some karaoke? Let me know when you return the plate :D I hope Tannie enjoys his piece of Matty’s birthday cake!

There was simply no way of denying it anymore, Taehyung was so down bad for you it was getting embarrassing. Also, it was Matty's birthday today?! He decided he would go get a gift for your puppy tomorrow, that way he could return the plate and give you something else so his visit wouldn't be so short.

Okay, maybe Taehyung had gone a little overboard, he only meant to buy Matty a small bag of toys and a treat, it wasn't in his plan to get a medium size basket full of goodies for your puppy. He quickly went into his home to grab your plate, and then stepped right back outside, making sure to close the door before Tannie could follow him.

He was a bit nervous, especially because work had gone a little long, so it was just shy of five past eight and the last thing he wanted was to wake you up if you were asleep. Thankfully, you opened your door within a few minutes, you smiled softly at Taehyung and the look in your eyes made him want to bring you your own little mikrokosmos. It didn't take long for you to notice the big basket full of toys, treats and other goodies.

“What's with the basket Tae?” She giggled, to say she looked puzzled was an understatement. “Well seeing that it was Matty’s birthday and I missed it I figured I’d get him a few things,” he tried his best to sound like his Yoongi hyung when he gifted someone something, even tried to look away whilst she grabbed it, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it, he loved seeing the way your eyes brighten at all the toys, he could tell you were happy, “I hope Matty will like them.”

“He’ll love them!”

“Also here’s the plate back,” he handed it to you once you had placed the basket inside your apartment, “thank you,” you smiled softly. You stared at each other for a bit, you were nervously fidgeting with your fingers, wondering if he would leave it at that, if he’d gotten bored of you and everything would be just like last time, and Taehyung would refuse to take her anywhere and then he would find someone else and leave her and-

“When did you wanna go get those corn dogs?” You were a bit embarrassed at how shocked you probably looked, you had to close your mouth and compose yourself quickly, “umm, how’s tomorrow?” you asked with a big toothy grin.

Oh yeah, you were both SO down bad.

“That works, pick you up at eight?” You nodded profusely, causing Taehyung to chuckle, “see you then Ynie.”

“See you then, Tae,” you smiled, closing your door. Taehyung felt like the first time you had a date, he didn’t care if you saw him or heard him as he cheered loudly.

Taehyung wanted to be comfy that next night, it was going to be a bit chillier so he opted for a pair of washed out baggy jeans, a white random print shirt, and a thicker green jacket with beat up sneakers. He wanted to look good for you, he wanted you to find him handsome, because no matter how often he got told how beautiful he was, it was always nice to still dress to impress. He walked out of his home and toward your door; he rang your doorbell and waited. He wondered what songs you would choose to sing today, whether or not it would have a double meaning, or if it would be just a normal random song. You looked beautiful when you came out of your apartment, you had retro bell-bottom black pants, a sweater, and what looked like comfy sneakers. You were wearing your natural hair and really pretty make up that accentuates your face features. Okay, now he was definitely staring. “Ready to go?” he offered you his arm, and you happily took it as you nodded, ready for the night ahead of you.

Taehyung was so impressed by you, this whole night made him actually think he was falling for you. You had eaten TWO whole corn dogs, and if it wasn’t because your slot for karaoke was booked ahead of time you would’ve probably had more, which he didn’t blame you for, corn dogs are something truly addictive. You made it to the karaoke venue, where you were led to the room you would have for the night, you were brought a bottle of soju and two small cups, and the device to pick a song.

You insisted that Taehyung go first, despite his insistence of having you go first because it’s the gentlemanly thing to do, you enjoyed watching him sing, his sultry baritone voice sent shivers down your spine, and to say it made you feel some type of way… that would totally be an understatement. He sang one of his songs, and then he sang one of his members songs. You think he’d told you it was his Seokjin hyung who sung it.

When I’m with you, there is no one else, I get heaven to myself.

You’d heard it before on the radio, but you didn’t know that it was one of their songs until now. Taehyung had changed a few lyrics to avoid saying “I love you,” he didn’t want to scare you off, and it was still very early stages; saying I love you was not necessary right at this moment and you didn’t need to know unless you looked it up later.

Your turn came up, and now it was time to put your plan in action. You had a specific song you had wanted to sing, and you had booked the room in this particular venue because they had it on their list. You were incredibly nervous, growing up you had always been the kid who wouldn’t stop singing, even if you were untrained, but you got stage fright fairly easily and most of the time you’d have to perform facing away from the audience, mostly your family, so you hoped that wouldn’t happen now, especially because you had sang for Taehyung before, even if you didn’t mean to, and even if there was a wall between you, you knew he was there so hopefully that would help your fears.

The notes started playing and Taehyung watched you intently, fascinated by your voice and the song lyrics, which spoke of social media stalking, accidental liking of old posts, and the sweetness of your lover. And then, Taehyung heard the chorus.

Tell me if you could love me, make me somebody, if you could love me do.

Taehyung wanted to kick himself, if he had known you were going to be throwing out love in your songs he would’ve done the same for his songs. You danced around as you kept singing, he pulled the small machine over and saw you were singing If by R5, he’d have to add it to the playlist he’d been building since your first jamming session.

Will you take all my feelings, angels and demons, if you could love me do, I could be with you.

As the final notes rang out of the speakers, you looked down, thankful for the dark atmosphere of the room, given that it hid the tint in your cheeks perfectly. Taehyung just stared, his eyes full of endearment, you had done amazing.

“That night at my apartment, I got scared because my breakup was fresh, and I was scared that all the green flags I saw in you would turn into red flags,” you explained, “I like you, matter of fact I’m sure I’m falling for you, but I was scared of committing to something new and have it end in the same situation as before.”

Taehyung was shocked at your confession, but he couldn’t be offended, based on the little he’d overheard and what you had told him, you had every right to be scared of something new coming into your life, he couldn’t blame for having doubts, which is exactly why he’d offered you space, he didn’t want to impose his feelings for you and make you feel like you HAD to be with him, he wanted you to feel confident in yourself and him.

“I understand Ynie, you don’t have to explain yourself,” he stood up and walked toward you, he stopped once he was at a reasonable distance, not too close, not too far.

“Yeah but I want to, I shouldn’t have kicked you out so suddenly without telling you that you did nothing wrong, I should’ve-” 

“That doesn’t matter now, I knew you were having a hard time, I could see it after you kissed me, that’s why I left without a fight, I didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable or forced to stay in a situation you didn’t want to be in,” he walked a little closer, slowly lifting his hand and cupping your cheek, he waited to see your response, and was pleased to see that you leaned into his touch, prompting him to rub your cheek with his thumb. “You deserve the world Ynie, I’ll take… How'd the song go again? Your angels and demons, I could and would love you and I want to be with you.”

You felt tears welling up in your eyes, “thank you for being the most amazing person Tae,” you sniffled and he quickly wiped the tear that had escaped the corner of your eye, your faces you were mere millimeters apart, your noses touched and your breaths mingled, “anything you for you… may I give you a pet name?” you nodded, he smiled, “anything for you yeobo,” he closed the distance between you trapping your lips with his in a searing kiss that had you feeling warm and fuzzy all over. Maybe things will be different this time, if things went well, you could see yourself having a long life with Taehyung.

Tag List:

@un06 :)

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Summary: You're both each other's escape but he can't tell you who he really is... Pairing: y/n x idol Yeonjun Word Count: 4.2k~ Warnings: Like one or two curse words lmao... that's it a/n: Requested by a lovely anon <3 I hope you like it :)

🟢  y/n is online

🟢 Yejun is online

Yejun: How's your day been? I haven't heard from you today :/

y/n: I am so sorry Yejun! Things have been pretty hectic at work and I wasn't even able to eat lunch today :(

Yejun: Oh my gosh that's horrible! How are you feeling? You must be exhausted! Have you eaten yet?

y/n: *send picture of your favorite food* Yup! I figured I would treat myself today!

Yejun: You definitely deserve it after the crazy day you had!

y/n: Enough about me though, how have you been? Did you do anything fun today? I know you said it was your day off so I hope you did :)

Yejun: Not really, I hung out with one of my roommates since we both ended up having today off so we just played some video games.

y/n: Oh did you guys try out that new game you said was coming out soon?

Yejun: Yeah we did! It came out on Friday but we didn't have time to check it out until now so it was fun trying to figure it out together. 

y/n: Did you win?

Yejun: Of course

y/n: As expected from my champion <3

I smile down at my phone after rereading your message for the 10th time before responding. "What are you smiling at?" Beomgyu says walking into the living room after waking up from his nap. "Nothing" I say locking and putting away my phone before another ding rings out notifying the both of us (unfortunately) of another one of your messages coming through.

"Doesn't look like it's nothing" Beomgyu says tilting his head trying to see my phone hidden behind my back. "Well either way it isn't any of your business I say defensively. "Yeonjun be honest, you're still talking to that girl aren't you?" he says, obviously disappointed in me. 

"So what? What's wrong with that?" I say continuing to defend myself. "She doesn't know who you are right? You know it could cause a huge scandal if-" "I'm being careful. But no, she doesn't know who I am. I know better than that" I say hoping the conversation is over and we can move onto something else. "You better..." he says trailing off.

"What's that supposed to mean? Last time I checked I was the hyung here. You really think you can talk to me like that?" I spit out getting fed up with him. "Okay I'm sorry I'll stop bugging you about it damn" he mumbles. "I'm sick of your disrespect Beomgyu. When are you gonna sto-" "Yeonjun that's enough" Soobin says walking into our dorm trying to defuse the situation. 

"You know what I'm done, I'm leaving" I say walking towards the door and heading outside. Luckily some of our staff are still hanging around outside since they had just dropped Soobin off. "Can you take me for a drive? I just need to get out of my head for a while" I ask knowing that taking a walk instead isn't really possible with my current idol status.

The staff nods and opens the car door for me before going over to the drivers side. "Do you have anywhere you would like to go or just somewhere away from the city?" he suggests and I'm happy to hear that he's able to read my mind. "Away from the city please, I need to get away from all the chaos" to which he nods and starts the car doing just as I had asked. 

I pull out my phone after our drive is underway and I remember that I had left you on read.

�� Yejun is busy → 🟢 Yejun is online

🟡 y/n is busy

The last message you had sent me was asking if I had any plans for the rest of the night. I'll be honest I downloaded this app with the intention of pretending to be someone else. I just wanted to be a normal guy, talking to normal people and having normal conversations. But when you're an idol that privilege gets ripped away from you and you don't realize how much you're going to miss it until it's too late. So my name on here is Yejun and he's basically me except with a new face and a new name.

Choi Yejun, Yes I know very creative but I did't want to lie too much

Age: 24

Birthday: September 12th which isn't a complete lie because it's the 12th in America but the 13th in Korea

Height: 6ft, yes I did add on an inch okay, sue me!

Blood Type: A

MBTI: ENFP

Education: Batchelor's degree in Music with a minor in dance. This one however is a lie laced with some truth okay, let me have this one. 

I got the pictures of "Yejun" off of instagram after looking through hundreds of accounts, trying to find one that fit my vibe. Luckily the account that I take the pictures from belongs to a very very narcissistic guy so I'm constantly getting new picture to send you if I need to. Do I feel bad lying to you? Yes of course.

I wasn't even planning on keeping this account for long. I just wanted to try and use it as some sort of escape. We met by chance and somehow along the way we just started messaging each other everyday and it's gotten to the point that I feel like there's something missing if I haven't heard from you that day. 

Some days are busier than others and I hate it. I wish I could just spend the day with you. Not just messaging you on my phone or computer but really spend time with you, in person. Somewhere along the way I started to fall for you. Don't ask me why or how, it kind of just, happened. I noticed it when I started to compare every woman I encountered to you, and none of them could live up to what you mean to me. Call me crazy but something in me is holding out the hope that someday we can be together, or at least meet. 

We've been talking to each other for months but I'm afraid that when I finally gain the courage to call you that you'll recognize my voice and that could be the beginning of the end for us. You're not even into Kpop like that, let alone my team (it hurt my ego a little bit but I got over it) but it still scares me. My attention is soon brought back to my phone as I see that you've come back online and responded to my message.

🟡 y/n is busy → 🟢 y/n is active

🟢 Yejun is active 

 Yejun: Hey sorry I got busy there for a second but no I'm free for the rest of the night. What about you? 

y/n: I'm free as well :)

Yejun: Good

y/n: Good?

Yejun: Yeah because you can pay attention to me after neglecting me all day :(

y/n: I already told you I was busyyyyyy 

Yejun: Yeah I know I was just teasing

y/n: If it makes you feel any better I really missed you <3

My breath hitches a bit at the confession. It's nothing big but for some reason it has my heart racing nonetheless.

Yejun: Yeah you better! But I missed you more ;)

y/n: Good, what are you up to?

Yejun: Nothing really, just relaxing, trying to clear my head.

y/n: Oh, is there something wrong?

Yejun: It's just that things have gotten really busy at work and I feel like I'm being stretched way too thin.

y/n: Could you maybe talk to your boss? See if there's anyways that someone could help you out?

Yejun: There's already four other people working with me so they can't really afford to spare anyone else. Plus it would throw us all off if someone else did join this late in the game. 

y/n: Oh okay that's understandable. You guys don't want to mess up the synergy you have going on right?

I smile happy that you're starting to understand me and my world without really knowing it. 

Yejun: Exactly! I couldn't have put it better myself :)

y/n: You know you can tell me anything right? I know that you like to keep things to yourself about you work and everything but if you're struggling with say your friends or you're feeling down then I'm always here <3

Yejun: Thank you y/n I really appreciate you and our friendship so much! You have no idea how much you've helped me since we first met. Life for me is just so fast paced so it's really nice to have someone who likes me for me and not for what I can do for them you know?

y/n: I totally understand, I feel the same way about you. Even though we haven't met in person I feel like you're the best friend I've ever had. Like a true friend, so thank you Yejun. You've made my days so much brighter and my nights so peaceful. I just don't know what I would do without you.

It's really me that needs you. Everything in my life from the age of 15 to 19 has been about debuting and now that I have it's just, well I don't know, things are just not the way I thought they would be. Seeing my Sunbaes debut before me just made me so excited at the prospects of someday following in their footsteps. I kept counting the days, waiting for that time to come when they would finally tell us we were going to debut. 

I was the first member of the team that would become Tomorrow x Together and the other guys trickled in bit by bit in 2016 and soon we were put together. It still took us about three years until we debuted but we worked hard every single day until we finally made it! 

A few months after we debuted though the pandemic hit, and everything about the way that idols and idol groups promoted their music and performed had completely changed. The day they told us that BTS had to postpone their world tour was the day that I knew everything was going to change.

It was hard being a new idol group and not being able to get the love, energy and support that most groups get. It just makes all of the hard work worth it when you get to see the look on people's faces and hear them cheering for you. Although my idol journey hasn't been the same as idol groups that debuted before me I wouldn't change it for the world.

The pandemic brought our team closer, but it also pushed us apart at times. Having to live together with the uncertainty of it all was nerve wrecking. It's all thanks to our Moa though, they really kept us going when times got tough. But even after the pandemic started to calm down I just couldn't shake the feeling that something was missing, that I had lost something and I wasn't sure how to find it. That's when I found you.

I had wanted to find some way I could escape from this whole idol world and just be me. Not Tomorrow x Together Yeonjun, just me Choi Yeonjun the kid who worked so hard for his dream and made it come true. I want people to like me for me, but things started to change with the people around me when I debuted. Some idols would try to befriend me, only to get closer to BTS and the friends that I had made before when I was still a trainee started to treat me differently now that I was "famous". 

The members of BTS and especially Namjoon hyung really helped me navigate this whole scene and always gave me the best advice. I watched them grow, from their tiny debut showcase and their even smaller fan meet, to their first win with I Need U. Everyday since the beginning I've seen what they're capable of and I want us to be that kind of group someday too.

Thanks to them they've opened up a lot of doors not only for us but for the whole industry. I'm always thinking of them and how much I've grown to love an support them, I always have and I always will. Plus they're all just so hilarious, they never fail to bring a smile to my face and I could never thank them enough. 

I know I'm rambling but those are the thoughts that go through my head when I try to process my life these days. There are days I want to say "Fuck this" and just leave, but there are other days that I just couldn't imagine myself doing anything else. It's come to a point where I don't think I could go on without being a part of this team, and that's gotten really unhealthy for me. This whole mindset I've found myself trapped in for these past few weeks has been utterly exhausting and the only thing that's kept me going has been you. 

I know I have my members and Moa and the company to rely on but I just want to be seen as a person, not an idol or an asset, just me. You've really brought me back down and helped me embrace my humanity again, as dramatic as that sounds it really is true. It's easy getting wrapped up in the glitz and the glamor of it all but having you really reminded me that I'm still my own person apart from all of this. It's just, I don't know...freeing I guess? Being able to just be myself, but I hate that I can't be my true self with you. 

I've adopted this persona that I have to stick to, for both of our safety. It's not that I don't trust you, it's just that I want to keep you away from all of this and keep your view of me as the same guy you've known this whole time. Yes with a new face and some tweaked physical traits but it's still me. I hope that someday if we get to meet that you won't hold it against me. I hope you'll realize that It was safer this way because I really want to keep you in my life but only for as long as you let me. 

y/n: Are you still there?

Yejun: Yeah I'm sorry I've got my head stuck in the clouds but I really do feel the same way :)

y/n: What's got you so distracted?

Yejun: Just life I just can't seem to separate myself from work you know? My work life balance isn't the best but unfortunately with the kind of job I have it's pretty much impossible to do so. 

y/n: I swear you get more and more cryptic everyday 

Yejun: I'm sorry I'll stop talking about it. What are you up to?

y/n: Nothing really, I just put on a show that I've seen before as background noise but I really have kept my night clear to talk to you and I'm glad it worked out :)

Yejun: Me too, but hey I have a question for you. Well more of a proposition...

y/n: You're scaring me but I'm all ears

Yejun: Would you maybe be free to talk right now? I just really need to hear your voice.

I've told you time and time again that I didn't feel comfortable talking on the phone but I think I need to make an exception for this time.

y/n: Are you sure? I mean yes I would love to talk to you but I just know you've been uncomfortable with the idea of calling but yes! Call whenever :)

I ask the staff to pull over into a pretty much abandoned parking lot hoping this will provide me with enough privacy. I step out of the car and let him know that I'm going to take a call and it might take a while, to which he nods and tells me not to wander off too far. 

My thumb hovers over the call button for a few moments before I finally take a deep breath and press it to start a call. It rings a few times and I can feel the anxiety build with every ring that plays until I hear a click telling me you've picked up. 

"Yejun?" I hear your voice resounds melodically.

"Um yeah hi" I say in english. Us living in different countries has also proved to be an obstacle in our relationship but it's honestly for the best. 

"Oh my gosh is it really you? I can't believe I'm actually hearing your voice!" you say clearly excited which releases so much tension I've been holding in my body all day. 

You've sent me voice notes before and if I'm honest I listen to them about twice a day but who knew that something as simple as actually speaking to you could make me feel so at peace. 

"Me neither, I don't know why I was so scared to call you but I'm so happy we are finally doing it" I say feeling like a new layer has been added onto our relationship.

"Me too, you've been sounding really down today though. I know you've already told me about it but is there anything I can do to help?" you ask.

"No it's okay love, why don't you tell me about your day instead?" I let out and start looking up at the stars. 

"Love?" you repeat, clearly surprised.

"Shit I mean-"

"No it's okay, I like it" you respond and I can hear how shy you've gotten from the accidental term of endearment.

"Really?" I ask now feeling embarrassed but also happy that you don't mind if I call you that. 

I've gotta try out other pet names to see how they will make you react because even if I can't see you I can clearly tell you're blushing. 

"Really" you say and the line goes silent for a while, neither of us knowing what we should say next. 

"So are you gonna tell me about your day silly?" I resort to, amused by your shyness. 

"Oh right, well when I got there this morning we..." you say telling me every little thing you could think about that had happened you today, and I mean it when I say that you tell me every detail but I can't help but find it incredibly endearing. 

"Yejun?" you say catching me off guard, I'm not really used to responding to that name when it's said aloud so it took me a second. 

"Hmm?" I hum in acknowledgement having lost track of your story.

"Were you even listening to me?" you laugh, clearly knowing the answer already.

I list off a few things that I had thought I had heard but unfortunately had gotten wrong.

"Yeah you said something about spilling your tea on yourself while you were at home and had to change again before you left right?"

"It was actually coffee and I spilled it on my coworker and they had to send it out for dry cleaning but luckily he keeps a spare set of clothes at his desk"

"Oh yeah and he said that you had to give him the money to pay for the dry cleaning"

"No he was really chill about it and I offered to buy him lunch as an apology so I went to go pick something up for us on our break so it would be ready for us during lunch"

"Right right and you went to go get fried chicken and they took forever" 

"I swear your mind is something else because it sounds like you know the plot but somewhere along the way lost all the details of the story" you say laughing at me and I know know now that I got it bad. I know it might seem foolish to say that I'm in love with someone that I haven't even met but there's just something about you.

"I'm sorry love, I just really love the sound of your voice so I kind of got lost in it. I'm not ignoring you I promise I guess that I'm just getting a little tired"

"Oh so I'm boring you to sleep?" you say sternly

"No y/n that's not what I meant I-"

"I know, I just wanted to hear how you would sound when you were panicked" 

"You're mean" I pout, really feeling scared that I already messed things up between us.

"Aw you love me" you say so simply that I choke on air before my mind can even fully process what she had just said.

"You okay over there?" you laugh clearly amused at my reactions to your teasing. 

"Yep *cough cough* all good" I say trying to calm myself down, this is so embarrassing, I don't even know how to respond to subtle flirting from you. It's come so easily to me when I'm with my members and even Moas but I guess since I don't have feelings for any of them like I do with you it's just a little more nerve wracking.

"Maybe I should let you go so you can get some sleep. It's probably really late over there right?" 

"Yeah I guess you're right. I just wish that the time difference didn't make things so difficult for us" I say taking a deep breath in and letting it out to calm myself. 

"Me too, but we finally spoke on the phone so at least that's something! We should do this more often!" you say trying to cheer me up. 

"Definitely! I'll let you know next time I'm free to call and you do the same for me okay? Maybe we could squeeze each other into our schedules a bit more" I say hopeful that something like that might work. 

"Sounds good. Goodnight Yejun" you let out in a melancholy tone.

"Have a good rest of your day love" I finish before hanging up. 

After finally getting back to the city and making our way to the dorm I'm reminded of the way I left in the middle of an argument. 

"Are you going to be okay Yeonjun?" the staff asks, clearly concerned knowing that something set off the need for this impromptu trip. "Yeah I just lost my temper but I'll be fine. Thank you for tonight, I know I kept you out for a lot longer than you're used to". "It's okay kid, I knew you needed it. Let me know if you need anymore late night drives again. Oh and Yeonjun" he calls out before I'm able to close the door. "I hope she's worth it" he says with a sad smile, clearly aware of what had just happened. "She is, don't worry" I say giving him a shy smile in return. "Have a good night, get home safe" I say and close the door after we finished saying our goodbyes. 

Walking in the door I'm greeted by the sight of Beomgyu sitting in the living room with a dim light providing us with a soft golden glow. "I really don't want to hear it tonight" I say starting to make my way to my room. "Please, I just want to apologize" he lets out, clearly remorseful. I stop in my tracks and think for a second before finally caving and sitting down on the seat opposite of him and wait for him to continue. 

"I'm sorry for the way I spoke to you today, it was uncalled for and I know that" he says pausing, giving me a chance to respond. "I know you're just concerned for the team and you're right, we have a duty to each other as a team but also we have a duty to each other as people. This has been going on for months and no one else has found out besides you because you're nosy" I say smiling at him, showing him a playful attitude rather than an accusatory one.

"I'm being careful don't worry okay? I wouldn't jeopardize the team like that. As much as it hurts me to have to keep my life a secret from her, she's very understanding about it all and isn't pushing me to tell her anything. Just please let me have this Gyu, I've got it under control" I say hoping we can leave it at that. "Okay, I trust you" he says and we sit in silence for a while until he speaks up. 

"You spoke to her on the phone tonight didn't you?" he asks with a sly smile. "No...yes...how do you know?" I ask confused as to how he could read me so quickly. "Because you looked so happy when you came in here verses how you left. A miracle had to have happened to curb that temper" he says clearly happy he was right. "Goodnight Beomgyu" I say and get up to make moves to go to bed, rolling my eyes at his cheekiness before I smack him upside the head and run off with him yelling and running after me. 

"Choi Yeonjun" I hear being yelled from inside of Soobin's room clearly having been woken up by our shenanigans. "Goodnight everyone" I yell back and close the door and lock it behind me providing me safety for the rest of the night. I let out and breath and shrug off the jacket I had been wearing and throw it on my desk chair and I soon hear a quite notification pop up and confused as to who it might be I pull out my phone right away and I smile instantly reading the message over and over and over again. 

y/n: Goodnight love talk to you tomorrow <3 

Read L0v3 y0u to see what happens next <3

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[male-reader-haven]

༺No Filter༻

You rarely ever fight with your boyfriend, Jimin, and even when you do you resolve it pretty quickly. So needless to say when Jimin boils over this time, it leaves you speechless and you see a whole new side of your sweet, submissive partner...

Tags: smut, top Park Jimin x sub male reader, angry sex, fuck and makeup

Warnings: 18+, edgy, toxic traits in a relationship but it gets talked over, intense, slight degradation and sadism

Requested by anonymous <3

I have no words. I also have no eyes therefore I cannot read or write so there is no possible way I could have written this your honor, I have no idea how this got here I swear-

"Hey baby, want to go out with me tonight? My old friends from high school reached out and want to meet, thought you might want to come." You scroll through your phone while sitting on the side of the bed. You feel Jimin hop over and playfully wrap his arms around your neck and his head rest on your shoulder.

"Do I know them?" He asks.

"I don't think so. It's Seoyoon and Yejun, I've been texting Yejun and he is the one who organized it. They are nice, I promise."

Jimin sighs on your shoulder.

"Sure, it sounds like fun. As long as we get food, I'm in." He smiles and gives you a peck on the cheek. You ruffle his hair and the both of you get on with your day.

Eventually the time to head out arrives, and you and Jimin head over to the restaurant you were instructed to meet at. You are waved over to a table where a tall, lean boy and a small girl with a bright smile are sitting, whom you know as Seoyoon and Yejun. You walk over.

"Y/N, it's good to see you!" Seoyoon runs up to you and hugs you. You laugh and pick her up.

"Great to see you too, Yoon!"

"For real, it's been too long. How have you been?" Yejun walks over and grabs your hand into a hug as well.

"Ah, life has been moving. This is Jimin! He's-"

"I'm his boyfriend." Jimin smiles and shakes Yejun and Seoyoon's hands. You turn to him at the interruption, but continue.

"Yeah, he is." You turn back to your friends.

"Nice to meet you Jimin, I'm Seoyoon. This is Yejun." Seoyoon reaches out and shakes Jimin's hand.

"Geez, how did you get stuck with this guy?" Yejun motions towards you to Jimin jokingly and shakes his hand. You all laugh and sit down.

The conversation is regular and Jimin chimes in a few times, but it's obvious that he is uncomfortable. You've known your friends all throughout your high school days so you clicked right away, and you can tell Jimin feels a bit left out.

"I gotta say Y/N, you glowed up since school. Seriously, you been hitting the gym?" Yejun gives you a short look up and down.

"Haha, yeah, I have actually. I dance now." You respond.

"For real? You have the perfect build for it." He reaches over the table to feel your shoulder and bicep. You flinch at the unexpected touch and laugh uncomfortably.

"Uh, thanks." You can see Jimin glaring from the corner of your eye.

"We should workout together while I'm still in town. Seoyoon has to leave tomorrow, but I'll be here a few days. It'd be fun!" Yejun smiles at you. "I want big sexy muscles too."

"Actually, this week is quite busy. See I've got rehearsal every night." Jimin interjects, shutting him down.

"Ah, no worries, maybe just me Y/N then if you're busy." Yejun doesn't even look at Jimin, who is giving him a death stare.

"Yeah, not happening." Jimin responds shortly, no longer masking his irritation.

"Jimin!" You turn to address his sudden tone, but Jimin isn't looking at you. Instead his eyes are shooting daggers at Yejun. Seoyoon coughs and speaks up.

"Ah, look at the time! We ought to get going." She laughs nervously and elbows Yejun in the side a bit harder than playfully. "Sorry for not watching the time close enough. It was great to see you again, Y/N, and it was lovely meeting you Jimin!" She smiles and stands up, pulling Yejun's arm.

"What are you talking about, Seoyoon? We just got here- ow!" Yejun clearly isn't getting the hint, and Seoyoon kicks his shin lightly.

"Once again, nice seeing you both!" She gets the both of them up and they start to walk away hastily.

"Oh- okay then, nice seeing you too!" You call out after them. After they are out of ear shot, you turn to Jimin.

"What the hell was that?" You can't hide the irritation in your voice.

"What, you mean that wierdo flirting with you right in front of me? Yeah, no clue." Jimin responds, equally frustrated.

"He's just a friendly guy, there was no need to be a dick."

"It's not being a dick if he is too stupid to get the point."

"Yeah, it is being a dick. You were a dick, and they left because of you."

"And i'm sure you just loved the attention Yejun was giving you, huh? If you didn't know he was flirting with you, you're an idiot! You gonna take him up on that one-on-one gym trip with him feeling up all over you?"

"Maybe I will. Then I would be able to get away from your posessive ass for a day!"

Jimin stands up out of his chair and leans over you, slamming his arms on the back on your chair.

"Is it so fucking wrong that I want you all to myself?" His eyes rake over you, up and down. Something about Jimin being pissed off and looking at you with those eyes made you feel hot.

"God, you're a fucking prick." You say under your breath, but Jimin catches it. He grabs the collar of your shirt and pulls you onto your feet. He then grabs the front of your shirt and practically drags you behind him as he storms into the restaurant bathroom. You both go inside and Jimin shoves you toward the wall.

"You like other men looking at you, huh?" He walks towards you menacingly with a gleam in his eye. You have never seen him act like this before. You kind of liked it.

"And if I do?" You scoff. Your eyes look into his defiantly. "What are you going to do about it?"

Jimin's face wears an expression you aren't familiar with. He leans in to your body, getting close to your neck and breathing heavily.

"You're fucking mine, you asshole." He sucks in air through his teeth and you feel his hand grip your side. You feel the hot desire in the air between you mixing with anger and you breathe heavier as well. Jimin's crotch grazes yours and he breathes on your neck, clearly trying to hold himself back. You can't take it anymore.

"Prove it, fuck me like you own me then." You whisper in his ear through gritted teeth. "Before I call Yejun."

Jimin growls and goes for your neck finally after hovering for so long. You suck in through your teeth from the sting of him sucking on your skin. You shiver as his hand grabs your hard-on through your pants.

"I'm going to make you forget his name." Jimin sneers and hastily grabs you, shoving you towards the sinks so that you have to grab the ledge behind you. He leans over you, forcing you to lean back and he attacks your collarbone while running his hands underneath your shirt impatiently. Your bodies heave in anticipation and Jimin grips your already hard member from within your pants, causing you to let out a deep groan and lean your head back, exposed for another attack from Jimin's unrelenting lips. He bites and sucks on your sensitive skin, leaving dark purple marks and bruises.

"Ah, fucking asshole, hng..." You grind against his crotch as revenge. Jimin responds by grabbing your hips and turning you around so that you are leaning over the sink counter, facing the mirror.

"Mine." He starts unzipping his pants and you unzip yours as well, impatient for what you both crave so intensely. He doesn't even bother trying to take off his pants and boxers completely, letting them fall to his feet and tearing your pants down so he can get to what he wants. He sidles up behind you, positioning himself, and takes a hand to your hair to force your head up. You are met with the lewd image in the mirror of your usually submissive boyfriend pissed off and horny as fuck, about to destroy you.

"I want you to watch and see how only I can fuck you. I want you to watch me claim your ass." He traces a finger over your still sensitive hickeys on your neck. "Everyone will know you're mine."

You shiver, but manage to give him a defiant look. "All that talk, think you can actually pull through?" You smirk. Jimin scowls and grips your hair tighter. You feel his hand trace your hole, sending electricity up your spine as he presses his fingers in and scissors them to stretch you out. Even with how angry and unbelievably horny he is, he still takes care to not hurt you... too bad, that is.

"Ah, fuck, aAH-" You exhale sharply as Jimin thrusts into you without warning. The sting seeps into pleasure quickly, fueled by your own lust. Jimin doesn't move, but looks to your face for any signs of you wanting to stop. But you are a stubborn, competitive man.

"W-what's the holdup?" At that, Jimin starts moving, slowly at first, then deep and fast.

"You should start taking me more seriously, hng!" He speaks through gritted teeth as he pounds into you. Each thrust stings and sends a wave of pleasure over you at the same time.

"Ah, ah, ahaah, f-fuck, hnng..." You don't want to admit it, but you're getting close. You hang your head down, getting lost in the rhythm, but Jimin yanks on your hair, forcing you to watch him pound into you through the mirror.

"You have to watch..." Jimin's voice gets deeper and his grunts turn into primal, animalistic growls as he speeds up, slamming into you rougher and deeper than before.

"Aaah, fuck! Fuck, Jimin, goddddd..." You can no longer contain your voice as you feel your dick twitch with every relentless movement from Jimin, his cock abusing your hole and grazing your prostate.

"You're fucking mine, my boy, nobody else's. Got that? Gotta get that shit through your pretty fucking skull, fuck, fucking slut, shit..." Jimin's words are low and slightly slurred. You can tell by his breathing and the way his hand grips your hair tightly and you feel his fingers dig into your hips that he is close also.

"Hng, fuck, Jimin, i'm close, fuck, don't stop!" You cry out shamelessly. Jimin smirks and slows down, making his thrusts deeper and agonizingly slower than before.

"Y/N... Say you're mine, tell me, please, fuck..." Jimin's voice cracks, a glimmer of his usual self shining through. You would have smiled, if it weren't for the pleasure of Jimin's cock abusing your prostate driving you mad.

"I'm yours, Jiminie, aah, all yours, I promise, hngg, aah, ohhhhhh fuCK-" You arch your back and your head reels as Jimin's cock brushes your prostate one final time as your own member releases ribbons of cum on the bathroom floor. Jimin's voice also cries out as he thrusts into you one last time, filling your abused hole with his cum as he collapses on top of you. You both lay there for a moment, admiring the image of you both fucked out in the mirror.

"F-ffuck Jiminnnn..." You wince as he pulls out of your sore ass.

"I-i'm sorry... I wasn't very considerate..." Jimin looks genuinely concerned and he starts cleaning up, helping you tidy yourself. You can't help but smile at his kind personality coming back.

"I take it you aren't mad at me anymore, baby?" You pull Jimin close to you and plant a kiss on his cheek.

"N-no... Y/N, I-" He avoids your gaze. "I'm sorry. I was... an asshole."

"You were. You were being posessive." You run your fingers through his hair lovingly. "Jimin, I don't understand why you feel threatened. I love you and only you, you KNOW that." You press your forehead to his. "I would never even dream of anyone else."

Jimin smiles. "Not even Yejun?" He looks up into your eyes.

"Who now?" You giggle. "You have nothing to worry about babe, I'm all yours." You lean in to his ear. "And for the record, you're hot when you top." Jimin turns your chin to look him in the eyes.

"Maybe I'll do it more often then." He smirks and taps on the hickey on your neck. You hiss slightly and rub your neck.

"Asshole..." You smile and walk out of the bathroom, hand in hand.

Send me suggestions on what to write next! ~ <3

-Masterlist-

[amakumos]

first skate — yang jungwon.

synopsis. you and yang jungwon are both figure skating olympic gold medalists. deciding to teach your three year old son yejun how to skate, you two both realise that you might have a future olympic gold medalist in your hands. perhaps… it just runs in the family.

genre. fluff, established relationship, figure skating au, dad au, sequel to kiss and cry (would be best if you read that fic first before you read this one!)

pairing. figure skater! jungwon x fem! figure skater reader

word count. 1.5k

warnings. nothing really

authors note. HAPPY BIRTHDAY JUNGWON! i know this fic is a lot shorter compared to blue birthday from last year but! my most recent fic before this was 22k monster kiss and cry which is the fic that this one is the sequel of! i actually love kiss and cry ynwon so much they will forever hold a special place in my heart and i am glad to be bringing them back for wonies bday <3 also i am bad at fluff so </3 im sorry .. anyways pls enjoy and (shameless self promo) but go read kiss and cry too if you haven’t!

“Okay, all ready now!” Jungwon says, tying the laces on his son’s skates with a smile. “You ready, Yejun?”

Yejun nods, a helmet on his head and knee guards on. Jungwon helps his son get off the bench as you watch the father and son duo with a fond smile on your face.

Jungwon takes Yejun’s hand as he guides his son towards the rink, Yejun wobbling on his skates. You two had specially booked out the Taereung ice rink for a few hours before Irene and her students showed up to train for the day.

Yejun shivers slightly, and you know that the jacket he’s wearing right now is a little too thin. You pull out one of Yejun’s puffer jackets from your bag, handing it to Jungwon so he can help Yejun zip it up. “Better?” you ask, and Yejun nods.

“Mom and I are going to teach you how to skate today.” Jungwon says, and Yejun nods. When Yejun takes his first step into the ice, he wobbles a little bit, due to how slippery the surface is.

Jungwon guides his son around the rink, the 3 year old boy wobbling around as he walks across the ice. You skate around the rink, Yejun looking at you in awe.

“Wanna try and walk to mom alone?” you say, skating closer towards Yejun. “Go, go, you got this, Yejunnie,” Jungwon says, letting go of his son’s hand.

Yejun looks a little hesitant to walk towards you without his father’s help, but he takes one step forward, wobbling as he holds his arms out, as if he’s walking a tightrope. “Good job, Yejun! Keep going.” you say, clapping your hands, a bright smile on your lips.

Yejun takes another step closer to you slowly, and Jungwon proudly smiles as his son takes more confident steps towards you. Yejun reaches you quickly, and you pick him up, giving him a hug. “Good job, Yejunnie!”

Yejun giggles as he’s held in your arms, and Jungwon looks at you two with the softest look in his eyes. He had retired not long ago, just a few months before returning to the rink now with you and Yejun. Coming back to what he considered his first home with you and Yejun made the moment all the more special.

You set Yejun down, making sure he doesn’t fall over on the ice before letting go. “Okay, walk to dad.” you say, and Jungwon skates a little further to see if Yejun can make it without falling.

The boy wobbles a bit, but he manages to make it to Jungwon without falling over. “That’s my Yejunnie,” Jungwon says, holding his hand up for a high five. Yejun gives him a high five with his gloved hands, and Jungwon smiles.

“I think our son here is a future Olympic gold medalist.” Jungwon says, and you smile. “Definitely.” you nod.

“Yejun, let’s skate around the rink for a bit, hmm?” Jungwon asks, and Yejun nods. “Okay.” he says.

Jungwon takes a hold of Yejun’s hand, but the young boy shakes his head, telling his father that he wants to try and do it alone. “Oh?” Jungwon says, smiling. “Okay. Go, Yejun.” he says, as Yejun makes small, hesitant steps while you and Jungwon watch from behind him.

“He’s doing really good.” you say, skating up to Jungwon. “I know. Way better than my first skate.” he says, lacing his fingers with yours. You two watch as Yejun makes his way across the rink, getting more confident with each step he takes. He speeds up, and you and Jungwon watch in amusement.

“Look at him go.” you say, and Jungwon nods. But just then, Yejun falls over, and both of your eyes widen in alarm. “Are you okay?” Jungwon asks, and Yejun simply uses his hands to help himself get back up, looking at both you and Jungwon as if nothing happened before continuing to make his way back to you both.

“Oh my god.” Jungwon says. “I’m giving him all my medals.”

“You’re right. Our son is a future Olympic champion.” you say proudly, watching as Yejun smiles brightly when he finishes a whole lap around the rink.

“You’re so good at this, Yejunnie!” you say, and Yejun’s smile gets wider. “You guys skate good.” Yejun says, pointing at you and Jungwon.

“You skate good too, Yejun.” Jungwon says. “If you like it, we can sign you up for lessons.”

“Okay.” Yejun hums. “Can I see you skate?”

You nudge Jungwon closer towards the centre of the rink, and he laughs, skating towards the middle before stopping and turning to look at you and Yejun. “What do you wanna see, Yejun?” he asks, hands on his hips.

“You wanna see Dad spin, or jump?” you ask Yejun, who puts his hand on his chin as if in thought. “Jump.”

“Jump?” Jungwon asks, and Yejun nods. Jungwon nods, skating around the rink for a couple seconds before taking off into a triple axel — he hasn’t done these in a while, but he lands the jump well, even if he thinks the landing is a tiny little bit shaky.

Yejun looks at Jungwon in awe. “Woah.”

“Cool, right?” you say, and Yejun nods. “I want to see you jump.” he says, tugging on the sleeve of your jacket. “You heard him!” Jungwon says, skating back towards you two.

Jungwon ruffles Yejun’s hair as the father son duo watch as you skate around the rink, taking off into a triple lutz—triple loop combination jump. “Woah. Mom did two.” Yejun murmurs in awe, and Jungwon nods.

“Yeah. She’s pretty awesome, hmm?”

“Yeah.”

“Still got it.” you say with a smile. You don’t jump very often now, since you had retired from competition after you won your Olympic gold medal, claiming that you had achieved everything you wanted to do in your wildly successful career. You were glad that you could retire feeling fulfilled with what you’ve done across the years.

“Of course you do. You’re the greatest.” Jungwon says, pressing a kiss to your cheek. You smile brightly at him, slipping your hand into his.

You two turn to look at your son, who seems to be trying to replicate what you had done. He tries to jump up like you did, but can’t get enough height. He pouts, looking up at you. “I wanna do that.”

“I am sure you will be able to someday.” you say, and Yejun looks at you and Jungwon happily. He skates off (or rather, walks off) on his own, wobbling a little bit at times, but he's doing great considering it’s his first time on the ice.

“I think we may have a prodigy here.”

You and Jungwon are startled by the voice of Irene, who had coached the both of you. She looks at Yejun with a fond look on her face. “How many times has he been on the ice?” she asks.

“First time.” Jungwon says proudly, and Irene’s eyes widen in surprise. “Really? Oh my… that’s raw talent right there.”

“I think he likes it.” Jungwon says, watching Yejun skate on the ice happily. He doesn’t even need one of those skating aids.

“I would be happy to coach him, if you two would like that.” Irene says, and Jungwon looks at you. “Let’s ask Yejun.”

“Yejun,” Jungwon says, skating up to his son. “Hmm?” Yejun looks up at his father with a bright smile. “Auntie Irene is over there.” Jungwon nods towards Irene, and Yejun looks at her.

“Hi, Auntie Irene.” Yejun says, waving at the coach. She waves back, with a small smile on her lips.

“Auntie Irene says that she can teach you skating if you would like that. We all think that you have talent, Yejunnie. You know, Auntie Irene was our coach too.” Jungwon tells his son.

“You don’t have to if you don’t like it.” you tell him, and Jungwon nods. “And you don’t have to take it seriously if you don’t want to. It can just be a hobby.”

“I wanna be like you guys.” Yejun says.

“So do you wanna skate?”

“Yeah.” Yejun nods excitedly, and you and Jungwon smile at each other.

You give Irene a thumbs up, and she nods. She lets you three stay on the rink for a little while more, with some of her students getting a chance to meet Yejun, who greets them all with a bright smile.

When you three head back home, you and Jungwon pull out your gold medals from the cabinet that holds them. You two head over to the couch, where Yejun’s watching television.

“Yejunnie.” you say, sitting down next to him.

“Your dad and I think that one day, you’re going to win one of these things.” you let Yejun hold your gold medal, and he smiles. “Very shiny.”

“It is, isn’t it?” Jungwon says, draping his own medal over Yejun’s neck.

“If you decide to be a skater like your mom and I, I bet you’ll win tons of these.” he says. “You’re a legend in the making.” You and Jungwon smile at each other whilst Yejun looks at the gold medals in awe.

And with each and every lesson Yejun takes, he seems to get better and better — and it fills you two with nothing but pride.

What can you say?

It must run in the family.

[chimamirenoai]

A Child’s Longing

Yandere! Mafia! Kim Namjoon x Female! Reader

“Mama, do I really have to replace Dad later?”

You looked up from the book you were reading and felt your heart squeeze helplessly. Your son sat on the floor while pushing his truck toy idly, a picture of innocence stained with the inevitability of a dark future. Every day he was trained to be the heir of the Kim family with little time to indulge in his childhood fully. And while he silently obeyed his father’s order, there were times when he questioned things. A natural curiosity, but it didn’t mean you knew what the natural answer was.

Rich people already lived in another world. Mafia families even more so.

You sighed.

“Of course, sweetheart. You’re the first child, therefore, you have to be the heir.”

“But you have a second child now.”

Instinctively, your hand went to pat your bulging stomach, where another innocent life was biding his sweet time before he was thrust into this stifling world. For him, and for you.

“Yejun, your little brother will have to study like you too.”

“But not as busy as I am, right?”

You fell quiet, for you knew not the answer was once again.

“I don’t want to be a leader.” Yejun sulked, slamming the toy petulantly. “I want to be an artist. I want to create things, not kill things.”

You flinched, recalling all the dramatic instances where Namjoon used his dirty position on you. First when he ordered some of his men to kill your boyfriend under the guise of a robbery, second when he lured you to his arms in your grief, third when he got close to your parents without your knowledge, fourth when you caught him talking to those men about ‘keeping an eye on your parents’ through the phone, fifth when he threatened to kill them if you misbehave in any way, and sixth when he forced you to marry him. Yejun growing up as a second Namjoon had always been your worst nightmare, both as a mother and a victim, but it wasn’t as if you had much freedom under this roof.

Not when you were still married to him. Not when he still loved you.

And this all began because you accidentally dropped your coffee on a hot guy’s shirt on one busy morning, and offered to lend him your coat to cover the stain which led to a long chitchat.

Life worked in a funny way, you thought. You were once a college student living in an average apartment, and now, you became a wife living in a fancy mansion. You couldn’t be rich and mentally content, just as you couldn’t be average and financially content.

It was impossible, just as it was fair. Ironically.

“You can create things as a hobby,” you paused, unsure if you wanted to enlarge his hope only to pop it like a balloon due to life’s intervention. And his. “or a side job, if your father allows it.”

“You know he won’t.” Yejun grumbled, pushing the toy away as if he was sick of it. “Father wants me to focus on my future job. It sucks.”

“What sucks?”

You both tensed up, yet your motherly and wifely instincts to please Namjoon and save Yejun were quick to react.

“N-nothing! We were just talking about how some toys break easily, and he thinks it sucks. Right, Yejun?”

The said boy nodded, half confused and half fearful.

Namjoon squinted slightly, unconvinced. For a split second, you feared he’d call you out and possibly punish Yejun for his petulance, but he seemed to be in a tolerant mood today.

“I see. It depends on how you treat them, of course. If you treat them roughly, then they’ll certainly break.”

You looked down wistfully, wondering if you’d broken now. If he’d break you again to the point of no return. Until he could build you back into a pliant woman he desired, the same way he stomped any fire of rebelliousness within Yejun.

Namjoon turned to him.

“Yejun, it’s time for your study.”

Sparing you a reluctant glance, the boy nodded and shuffled out of the living room as though his toys were now calling him to stay. The door closed, and you were left with your personal demon.

“It’s not good to lie, you know.”

You froze, and those instincts went haywire.

“P-please don’t punish him.” you begged, clutching his hand desperately. “He didn’t know what he was saying, and I swear I’ll fix his attitude next time. Just please don’t hurt him!”

“I’m not as cruel as to spill a drop of blood from him, [Name]. The most ‘hurtful’ punishment I can’t give him is solitary confinement.” Namjoon retorted, affronted by your subtle accusation. “But I won’t punish him today, because you look so precious when defending him. Like a true mother.”

He smiled and stroked your hair, but you didn’t allow yourself to relax. You couldn’t allow yourself to relax. Not with him. Not around him.

“I truly picked the right wife, didn’t I?”

You peeked up through your lashes. Still, you had to try. For Yejun’s sake.

“So, will you allow him to be an artist? At least as a hobby?”

“Sure. Why not?” He shrugged cavalierly. “As long as it doesn’t distract him from his duty, and I forbid him from publishing anything.”

It sounded unpleasant to hear, but it was still something.

“Thank you, I really appreciate it.”

Namjoon chuckled, “Shouldn’t it be him who said that?”

You tittered.

You might not be able to veer Yejun completely from his predestined path, but you’d be damned if you didn’t retain some of his humanity. His individuality. And you’d suck up to Namjoon even if it embittered you on the inside. Even if he already knew about your little plan.

Because he just loved it when you acted as his sweet little wife and mother.

[writingforstraykids]

Always back to you - Chp.4

Pairing: Minho x m!Reader (mention of 3racha)

Word Count: 7000

Summary: Minho gets a call from his ex-wife, asking to meet Minjun. Hesitating, he agrees to the meeting but not without you by his side. You both find your way around each other as the boundaries between friendship and love dissolve more and more...

Warnings/Tags: fluff, single dad!min, angst, domestic shit, emotional hurt!comfort, panic attack,

A/N: Thank you for all the love for the story and little Minjun so far. I hope you enjoy this chapter, some of you have been waiting for what happens here hehe🖤

PART THREE | PART FIVE

do not repost, translate, or plagiarize my works in any way here or on other platforms. ©️writingforstraykids 2024 -

The steady rhythmic sound of a knife chopping vegetables abruptly halts as the sharp, insistent ring of Minho’s phone pierces through the quiet kitchen atmosphere. Minho's hand stills, a sense of dread creeping up his spine as he stares at the caller ID. What? 

Minho glances out of the window quickly, seeing you and Minjun still playing peacefully outside. His eyes wander back to his phone and it takes everything in him to take it into his hand, his thumb hovering over the screen. He takes a deep breath before picking up the phone. "Hello?"

"Minho, it's Yejun," comes the voice on the other end, unmistakable and unexpectedly calm. The sound of his ex-wife's voice, not heard in conversations for years, is enough to make his heart skip a beat.

"Hi, Yejun...What's up?" Minho manages to keep his voice steady, though his grip on the phone tightens.

"I’ve been thinking. It’s been a long time, and I want to meet Minjun. I want to see our son," she says.

Minho feels as if the floor dropped from beneath him. The request comes as a shock, reopening a chapter of his life he thought had been firmly closed. He leans heavily against the kitchen counter, trying to gather his thoughts. "I...that’s quite sudden. I’m not sure that’s a good idea," he replies, the discomfort clear in his voice.

"I know it’s sudden, Minho. I just want to be a part of his life," she says.

“Mhm,” he hums sourly, feeling nothing but defensiveness bubbling up in him.

“What’s that supposed to mean, huh?” she asks sharply and Minho closes his eyes, swallowing down the memories that flood his brain at that tone.

“Means I wonder what makes you think you can leave and then come back once he’s old enough to do a lot on his own,” he says, chewing on his lower lip.

“It’s my right to see him, Min,” she says.

“Don’t,” Minho says firmly. “Don’t even start claiming it’s your right to meet him. You left him once he was old enough to drink from the bottle. You have absolutely no right to demand anything.”

“Gosh, Min, still so emotional, hm?” she groans and Minho puts his phone on speaker, slamming it down on the table and mocking her quietly. Her laugh rings in his ears as she starts talking again. “I want to meet him. If he doesn’t like me, I’ll go.”

“Gosh, Yejun, still taking the easy way out, hm?” he gives back dryly, bracing himself at the table. “Why now?”

“As you said, he’s easy to handle now. I’m curious,” she says.

“Curious…If you meet him, I’m there every damn second, you hear me?” he asks, and she agrees reluctantly. “If you hurt my son in any way, I’m taking him home, and that’s the last you saw of him.”

“Relax,” she snorts. “I’ll be in Seoul next week from Monday until Friday. Let’s meet up then.”

Minho agrees hesitantly, ending the call with a heavy sigh. As soon as he puts the phone down, a wave of nausea sweeps over him, his hand flying to his stomach as if to quell the rising sickness. Pacing the kitchen, he feels his mind race with worries about the past getting back at him, about the potential destruction of Minjun’s more or less stable but happy life.

You get back inside to refill Minjun’s water bottle as he quickly uses the bathroom in the meantime. You find Minho in the kitchen, his face pale, bracing himself on the table. "Minho? What’s wrong? You look sick," you ask worriedly. “You’re feeling dizzy again?”

Hearing your voice seems to ground him momentarily. He looks up at you with a mixture of fear and uncertainty. "That was Yejun," he manages to say, his voice a whisper of distress. "She wants to meet Minjun. She says she wants to be part of his life."

Your expression shifts from concern to shock. You’ve heard of her, of course, the woman who had left Minho to raise Minjun alone and caused much of his earlier heartache when you met him. "Oh, Minho," you murmur, stepping next to him. “What are you going to do?"

"I don’t know," Minho admits, his voice shaky. "Part of me thinks maybe it’s good if Minjun knows his mother. But another part...I can’t bear the thought. What if she leaves again? What if she hurts him? I can’t let Minjun go through that."

You nod, understanding his inner conflict. "This is tough, but whatever decision you make, I’m here. You’re not alone in this, Minho."

Minho looks into your eyes, finding peace in your unwavering support. Taking a deep breath, he tries to calm his racing heart. "Can you... Can you just hold me for a minute?" he asks, his voice barely above a whisper. He doesn’t know why he’s suddenly asking for that, but somehow, it feels right.

Without hesitation, you wrap your arms around him, pulling him close. Minho buries his face in your shoulder, allowing himself to feel vulnerable, to accept the comfort being offered. As they stand there, Minho feels a tiny fragment of his anxiety ebb away, the warmth and steadiness of your embrace lending him strength.

After a long moment, Minho steps back slightly. "Thank you, Y/nnie. For being here," he says, his voice thick with gratitude.

"Always," you reply, squeezing his hand.

Minho feels a little steadier, bolstered by your support. "Would you...come with me to meet her? I think I might need someone there, just in case. I uh…I don’t know how it’ll be seeing her again and everything."

"Of course, Minho. I'll be there," you reply gently.

-

The day of the meeting arrives with a tense air. Minho is quiet as you both drive to the cafe where the meeting with Yejun is scheduled. Every now and then, he glances at Minjun in the rearview mirror, who is blissfully unaware of the gravity of the situation, chatting excitedly about the new game you had taught him. He seemed excited to meet his mother, which was the only reason Minho decided to let them.

As you arrive and find Yejun already there, a chill runs down Minho’s spine. She looks different, yet somehow the same, and his stomach tightens as he watches her wave them over with a bright, practiced smile. Minjun gently tugs at his jeans, as always when meeting new people. He’s glad to have something to hold onto as he picks him up and soothingly pats his back. 

You stay close to them, looking at Yejun curiously. You had never felt the need to look up old pictures of Minho and her, so you had no idea what she looked like…and looking at her makes you realize she’s stunningly beautiful. Her dark, long curls frame her perfect face, skin smooth and accentuating her bright eyes. A red dress hugs her body in all the right places, and she looks delicate but elegant. God, no wonder Minho had a hard time getting over that. Getting closer, you realize Minjun must’ve inherited the freckles covering her nose, as well as the curly texture of his hair. 

"Minho, it's been too long," Yejun greets, standing to embrace him swiftly. She presses a short kiss onto his cheek that has Minho tensing up, eyes widening. Ah, lovely.

"Yejun," he nods, taking a few steps back, then turns to you. "This is Y/nnie."

"Nice to meet you," you say, offering a polite smile, though you feel the undercurrents of tension.

“And that’s..?” she asks, glancing at Minjun.

“Oh for fucks sake,” Minho mutters quietly making Minjun giggle and cover his mouth with his little hand. 

“Bad word, Daddy!” he protests, making you smirk.

“That’s some kid I stole on the way here,” Minho rolls his eyes at her. “That’s Minjun…obviously.”

“Oh…you’ve gotten big,” she nods, looking at Minjun curiously. 

“Well he was six months old when you left, go figure,” Minho says patiently, with a fake calm smile on his face. “Minjunnie, say hi to your mother.”

Minjun frowns at her softly before looking up at Minho. “Daddy? Mum who ran away?” he asks and you have trouble biting back a laugh at her perplexed face.

“Mhm, that one,” Minho nods, pulling himself out a chair. “She wants to talk to you, so be nice, buddy.”

“Okay,” he nods, getting comfortable in his own chair, blinking at her curiously. 

The conversation starts with trivialities, Yejun asking about Minjun's interests. But soon, she shifts the topic to her life in the US, describing her home, the parks, and the schools that she says would be wonderful for Minjun once he’s old enough.

Minjun listens, wide-eyed, clearly taken with the idea of such places. "Can I see them, Daddy? Can I visit her in America?" he asks, looking excitedly between Minho and Yejun.

Minho feels a pang in his heart at the words, his fear creeping back as he watches his son’s enthusiasm. He tries to keep his voice even. "We'll see, buddy. We're just talking right now."

Yejun leans forward, her tone persuasive. "I have a great life there, Minjun. You could have your own room, a big yard to play in... I'd love to show you around."

Minho feels sick watching the scene unfold, his hands clenched under the table. You notice his discomfort and place a reassuring hand on his knee. As the meeting draws to an end, Minho is quiet, lost in thought as Yejun makes plans to visit Minjun again. "Let’s take it slow, one step at a time," Minho finally says, not committing to anything more.

On the drive back, Minjun chats happily about the things his mother had told him, while Minho remains silent, his expression drawn.

Once home, Minho retreats to the kitchen, his movements sluggish, each step seeming to weigh heavily on him. You watch as he leans against the counter, his face pale and his eyes distant. Concerned, you approach him, your hand gently touching his arm. "Minho?" you call softly, trying to get his attention.

He looks up, his eyes meeting yours, and there's an unspoken plea for comfort. The day had drained him, dredging up past pains and uncertainties about the future. "I just... I don't know if I did the right thing today," he admits, his voice barely above a whisper. "What if she convinces him? What if he wants to go with her?"

You understand the turmoil he's in. The possibility of Minjun wanting to leave with Yejun is his worst nightmare coming true. Stepping closer, you wrap your arms around him, offering him a silent reassurance. "Minho, you're an incredible father. Minjun knows that. Whatever Yejun says or does, it won't change the bond you two have."

Minho rests his forehead against your shoulder, his breath shaky. "I hope you're right," he murmurs. "It's just hard not to feel threatened, to feel like everything we have could be disrupted by her return."

"It's understandable to feel that way," you reply, holding him tighter. "But remember, Minjun loves you. He's grown up with you. That connection, those memories, they're not easily broken or forgotten. You're his dad, the one who's been there for him every single day."

As you speak, Minho's tension begins to ease. He pulls back slightly, looking into your eyes, searching for the certainty he so desperately needs. Seeing the sincerity in your gaze, a small smile begins to form on his lips. "Thank you, Y/nnie," he says. "For being here, for supporting me through this."

"Always," you reply, smiling back.

The kitchen is quiet for a moment, the only sound being the soft ticking of the clock on the wall. Minho seems to ponder your words, letting them sink in. Gradually, the anxious lines on his face smooth out, replaced by a more resolute expression. "I won't let her take him away," he states, more to himself than to you. "I'll do whatever it takes to keep Minjun with me."

"And I'll help you," you assure him. 

As the evening sets in, you and Minho prepare dinner together, the earlier tension melting away into a comfortable routine. Minjun joins you, chatting excitedly about his day, blissfully unaware of the complex emotions his father has been grappling with. Watching Minho laugh and interact with his son, you feel a profound sense of admiration and love for him. 

Later, as you sit down to eat, the atmosphere is light, filled with Minjun’s laughter and stories. Minho looks over at you, a silent gratitude in his gaze. Despite the challenges, he knows he isn't alone. With you by his side, he feels ready to handle whatever may come.

That night, after Minjun has gone to bed, you and Minho find yourselves on the couch, a comfortable silence enveloping you. Minho leans his head on your shoulder, his earlier fears now calmed by your presence and the peaceful end to the day.

"Today was hard," he admits quietly.

"It was," you agree. "But you got through it. And you’ll get through whatever else comes your way."

-

Minho stands silently in the middle of the living room, the soft hum of the evening settling around him. The faint laughter and shouts of children playing outside drifts through the open window, a stark contrast to the turmoil brewing inside him. His hands tremble slightly as he turns over a small toy that Minjun had left on the couch—a constant reminder of his responsibilities, his fears, and his deep-seated insecurities about being a father. Minjun is staying with Felix and Chan for a few hours and you'll visit to work through a few important aspects of his schedule. 

The weight of his thoughts and the relentless pressure he placed on himself were reaching a boiling point. The room feels smaller, the walls closing in as each of Minjun’s innocent questions from earlier that day echoed in his head, “Are you happy, Daddy? Does Yejun like me? Can I go to America?” The questions are simple, filled with the childlike curiosity of his young son, yet to Minho, they are a reflection of his deepest fears—is he truly enough?

The anxiety that had been simmering throughout the day suddenly surges, a tidal wave crashing over him with suffocating force. His breathing becomes shallow, each inhale sharp and unsatisfying. His heart races uncontrollably, pounding against his ribs as if trying to escape. The room spins, and a nauseous feeling tightens in his gut. He's having a panic attack, the intense fear of failing his son overwhelming him completely.

Just then, you walk in. You stop in track at the sight of Minho, his face pale, his body tense and trembling. Dropping your bag, you rush over. “Minho! What’s happening?” Your voice is laced with concern as you reach out to steady him, your hands gripping his arms.

“I...I can’t breathe properly,” Minho gasps out, his voice shaky. “I feel like I’m not enough for him...like I’m going to fail him.”

You quickly lead him to the sofa, helping him to sit down. “Look at me, Minho. Follow my breathing, okay? In and out, slowly,” you instruct him gently, demonstrating deep, steady breaths.

Minho tries to mimic your breathing, focusing on the rise and fall of your chest. Gradually, his own breaths begin to deepen, the tight grip of fear around his chest loosening slightly with each exhale. You don't let go, your presence a calming force in the storm of his panic.

After a few minutes, as the initial wave of panic begins to subside, Minho feels exhaustion seep into his bones, replacing the adrenaline that had surged through him just moments before. He leans back against the sofa, his eyes closing briefly in fatigue.

“You’re doing great, Minho. Just keep breathing like that,” you murmur, your voice a soothing balm. “You are enough for Minjun, more than enough. You’re an incredible father.”

Tears prick at Minho’s eyes as he listens to your affirmations. “I’m scared,” he admits, his voice a broken whisper. “What if it’s not true? What if I’m not what he needs?”

You shift closer, your side pressing against his, a silent offer of solidarity. “Minho, look at everything you’ve done for him. He adores you. Your fear doesn’t define your reality. You are exactly what Minjun needs because you love him, and you show up every day for him, even when it’s hard. Especially when it’s hard.”

The sincerity in your words, the warmth of your body next to his, it all pierces through the fog of Minho’s anxiety, reaching a part of him that he kept walled off from everyone else. He turns to look at you, really look, seeing not just a friend but someone who has come to mean so much more to him.

Without thinking, driven by the emotions swirling within him and the need to be closer to the one person who seemed to understand him completely, Minho leans in. You hesitate, leaning in a little before you both stop for me a moment. Then you meet halfway, your lips touching in a kiss that is soft and hesitant at first but quickly deepened with shared urgency and emotion. But as seconds pass, the kiss deepens, driven by a mixture of long-suppressed desires and the comforting familiarity that has grown between you over countless shared moments.

All that matters is the here and now—the warmth of your lips against his, the gentle exploration that grows bolder with each passing moment. Your hands move to cup Minho’s face, your touch tender yet assured, pulling him closer, deepening the kiss until it is all-consuming.

Minho’s hands find their way around you, pulling you in, his heart pounding against his chest. The kiss grows more desperate, a silent confession of the feelings that had been simmering beneath the surface for so long. Your breaths mingle, quick and shaky, as the kiss ignites a fire within you both, a blaze that seems to fill the voids you had both carried inside.

But as the intensity of your embrace grows, so does a creeping fear in the back of Minho’s mind. His heart, scarred from past hurts and losses, begins to recoil at the vulnerability he is exposing himself to. The memory of his past, of being left alone when he had dared to love openly, surges forward, casting a shadow over the warmth he feels.

Your hands trace the line of Minho's jaw, gentle yet insistent, pulling him closer. Minho responds in kind, his hands finding the small of your back, pressing you together. The kiss grows more fervent, more desperate, as if you're trying to communicate every unspoken word, every suppressed emotion through this single act. 

As your breath quickens, Minho’s emotions swirl chaotically—a blend of exhilaration and deep-seated fear. The intensity of your connection right here is something he hasn't allowed himself to fully experience for a long time, not since his heart had been guarded against such vulnerabilities.

Suddenly, the weight of his past, the memories of abandonment, and the fear of experiencing such profound loss again surge to the forefront of his mind. It is overwhelming the way these fears claw their way up, threatening to overshadow the warmth and safety he had just been reveling in.

With a sudden intake of breath, Minho’s hands still, and he pulls back slightly, breaking the kiss. His heart is racing, not just with the passion of the moment but also with a creeping dread that he might be setting himself up for another heartbreak. His chest heaves as he tries to steady his breathing, his eyes wide and vulnerable as he meets your concerned gaze.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, his voice choked with a mixture of fear and regret. “I... I need a moment.”

Your face is a mixture of worry and understanding. You reach out, brushing a trembling hand against Minho’s cheek. “It’s okay, Minho. We don’t have to rush anything. I’m here, okay?”

Minho nods, feeling a lump form in his throat. He is terrified, not of the kiss or the connection but of what it signifies. To let someone in so completely was to risk being torn apart again. And yet, as he looks into your eyes, he sees a reflection of something pure and steady—a commitment not just to the joy of their relationship but to the struggles, too.

Minho takes a deep breath, each inhale laced with the scent of your skin, a reminder of the now. “I just... I’m scared of losing myself, of losing Minjun, of being left alone again if this... if we don’t work out,” he confesses, his voice barely a whisper amidst the quiet of the room.

Your expression softens, your eyes filling with empathy. “Minho, love doesn’t come with guarantees, but not giving ourselves the chance to experience it fully is a guarantee of regret. I don’t know what the future holds, but I promise to be by your side through the highs and the lows. You’re not alone anymore, and you won’t be.”

These words, gentle and reassuring, seem to stitch up the raw edges of Minho’s fears slowly. He allows himself to lean into you, feeling the solidity of your presence. “Thank you,” he murmurs, allowing himself to feel the full extent of his vulnerability.

“Thank you for not running,” you say, a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips. The tension begins to dissipate, replaced by a cautious hope.

“Thank you for staying,” Minho shakes his head gently. 

You smile, your hand squeezing Minho’s. “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be,” you assure him. You lean forward, pressing a soft kiss to Minho’s forehead, a simple gesture that holds a depth of meaning.

Minho allows himself to be held, his head resting against your shoulder, feeling the steady beat of your heart against his cheek. It is comforting, grounding. Slowly, his breathing evens out, the immediate panic subsiding under the gentle rhythm of your assurances.

“You mean a lot to me, Y/nnie,” Minho confesses, pulling back slightly to look at you. “I don’t want to lose you, not because of my fears.”

You smile, your hands sliding down to grasp his. “And you won’t lose me. I care about you, Minho. We’ll face this together, okay? Step by step.”

“Okay,” Minho agrees, squeezing your hands. “Step by step.”

The moment is tender, a delicate truce between Minho’s fears and the possibilities that lie ahead. You stay like that for a while, simply holding each other, finding comfort in the presence of one another.

When it is time for you to leave, Minho finds himself not wanting to let go. The goodbye is lingering, filled with the promise of soon and more. You leave him with a smile, and Minho watches from the doorway, feeling a mixture of contentment and longing.

That night, as Minho lies in bed, Minjun peacefully asleep next to him, he thinks about the kiss - the way it had made him feel alive, the way it had scared him. He touches his lips, still feeling the ghost of your touch. The fear is still there, a quiet whisper in the back of his mind, but it is slowly being overshadowed by a stronger, more insistent feeling: hope.

He knows the road ahead will be fraught with challenges, but for the first time in a long while, Minho feels ready to face them. With you by his side, he isn't just facing the future; he is stepping into it, one kiss, one conversation, one promise at a time.

-

Minho nervously ties Minjun’s shoelaces, hoping his attentive little boy can’t see the anxiety written all over his face. He gently takes Minjun’s small hands into his and searches his eyes. “Minjunnie?” he asks softly.

“What, Daddy?” his son asks curiously.

“Daddy loves you a lot, okay?” he asks, and Minjun nods contently. “I’m sorry I can’t always be there, I’ll try to get better.”

“It’s okay,” he says, gently patting his father’s head.

Minho giggles at him and pulls him into his lap. “I will always love you, okay? No matter what happens.”

“Always?” he asks softly, and Minho nods firmly. “Always come back?”

Minho cups his face, smiling at him encouragingly. “I’ll always come back to you, buddy.”

“Good,” he smiles brightly. “Yejun now?” he asks, and Minho nods.

“Yeah,” he says, almost feeling a little ashamed for being so relieved about Minjun not calling her his mother.

You open the door, glancing inside. “You two are ready to go?” you ask. “I’ll drop you off at the café, make sure everything’s in place at the location for the shoot, and then come back. I won’t be gone longer than ten minutes, it’s on the other side of the road.”

“Sounds good,” Minho nods, subconsciously chewing on his lower lip. He pushes himself back up and meeting your eyes, you can tell he needs a hug. 

“Come here,” you say gently, opening your arms for him. Minho laughs weakly and hugs you tightly, fingers gripping the fabric of your shirt. “It’ll be okay,” you tell him, earning a timid hum in return. 

“Daddy?” Minjun frowns up at you two worriedly. 

Minho leaves your warm embrace, picking him up. “I’m okay,” he assures him, his one hand finding yours. Your fingers intertwine almost naturally, and you can feel his hand tremble in yours a little. 

“Liar,” Minjun says softly, not even sounding like he’s judging him for it.

Minho chuckles weakly and searches your eyes. “Minjunnie? You really like Y/nnie, right?” he asks, watching you with a gentle smile.

“No,” he shakes his head, making your heart sink for a moment. “I love Y/nnie, Daddy.”

You both laugh softly, and you gently poke his cheek. “I love you too, Minjunnie…and I care a lot about your Daddy too.”

“I…I love Y/nnie too,” Minho says quietly, and your world stops turning for a few seconds. 

“What?” you ask just as quietly, swallowing hard as tears brim Minho’s soft chocolate eyes. 

“I love you, Y/nnie,” he tells you again, a little less shaky this time. “I do,” he says as if he has to reassure you both he put it into words.

“I love you too, Minho,” you whisper happily, your heart warming. Minho squeezes your hand, searching your eyes timidly. You don’t think much, closing the distance between you two and kissing him softly. Minho sighs quietly, feeling at ease here in the moment of kissing you.

Minjun squeals making you break apart again. “Eww, but yay,” he says with wide eyes, making you giggle.

“Okay, let's go,” you laugh and gently shove Minho out of the room. 

You drive them to the café and Minho shares another quick kiss with you before getting out. You quickly cross the street to check the set, hoping it won't take long. 

-

The tension in the air is thick as Yejun sits across from Minho at a small, brightly lit café in the heart of Seoul. The noise of the bustling city outside does little to fill the silence that hangs between them. Minho watches her observantly as she tries to talk to Minjun, who’s busy coloring in the book she gifted him earlier.

"Minjun, you would love it in America," Yejun begins, her voice infused with excitement. "We have huge parks, and there are so many fun things you can do. There's Disneyland, with all the rides and characters you love."

Minjun's eyes light up at the mention of Disneyland, but his smile falters as he glances sideways at Minho, who sits silently, his expression unreadable. "Can Daddy come with us?" Minjun asks innocently, his voice tinged with hope.

Yejun’s smile tightens slightly. "No, it would just be you and me. But think of all the adventures we’ll have!"

Minjun’s face falls. "But I want Daddy...and Y/nnie," he ads, his small voice growing firmer. "I want them."

Yejun’s patience began to crumble. "Minjun, I’m your mother. I have a wonderful life set up for us in America. You need to think about what I’m offering you."

Minho, who has been quietly observing the exchange, sees the confusion and distress growing on Minjun’s face. "Yejun, that's enough," he interjects calmly. "You’re overwhelming him. He’s only a child."

Yejun turns her gaze to Minho, her eyes flashing with irritation. "You have no right to keep him from me, Minho! You’ve turned him against me, huh? You stole my son!"

The accusation stings, and Minho’s voice grows stern. "Yejun, I haven’t stolen anyone. I’ve been here for Minjun every single day since he was born. He’s my son too, and I have been his only parent for years."

“Well, I’m his mother and-”

Tears well up in Minjun's eyes as the tension rises. He can tell his father is upset and trying not to show it, he may be young but he knows him well. The woman opposite him glares at him and he doesn’t like that at all. "You're not my mum, Y/nnie is!" he cries out, the emotional toll of the conversation beginning to show. "Y/nnie plays with me. Y/nnie makes me food. Y/nnie cuddles me!"

Yejun blinks, her face contorted with a mix of shock and disgust. "Y/nnie? That babysitter? You think he's a better mother than me?”

“Yes,” he says stubbornly, staring down at his coloring book again.

“Minho, what the fuck have you done with this child?” she asks frustratedly.

Minho reaches out, taking Minjun’s hand in his, providing a comforting touch. "Y/nnie has been here for him. What Minjun is trying to say is that family isn’t just about blood; it’s about who cares for you, who’s there for you."

Yejun’s anger flares, and she stands abruptly, her chair scraping loudly against the floor. "He is my son, and you’ve turned him into this...this weak, dependent child clinging to a man who has no business raising him!"

Minjun’s tears spill over, and he buries his face in Minho’s side, sobbing. Minho wraps his arms around his son protectively. "He is not weak. He’s a child, Yejun. And you’re upsetting him."

“I can’t believe you’re letting his babysitter take my role!” she protests loudly.

“That babysitter is my boyfriend,” Minho says firmly. Technically, the two of you aren't there yet but he couldn't care less right now. “So you better watch your mouth now.”

“Really? Dating a man?” she scoffs. “Did I break your heart so much you’re too scared to face another woman?” she spits out.

“What?” Minho almost chokes on his breath.

“You’re stupid,” Minjun states, pouting at her through tears. He doesn’t like how she’s talking about the two most important people in his life. “Daddy loves Y/nnie. Not you.”

“You’re coming with me now, if you like it or not!” she says firmly, reaching out for him.

"Don’t touch him," you snap, your voice icy as you move to block her path. "You need to leave, Yejun. You’re only causing him distress." You can’t believe what you got back to here.

Yejun stares at you, her anger boiling over. "He’s my son, not yours! You have no right—"

"He's not your son!" Minho interrupts firmly, standing up to face her, his voice echoing in the small space. "Not if you can’t see the damage you’re doing right now. Minjun has made his choice!"

“Not my mummy,” Minjun agrees. Still clinging to Minho, he peeks out and yells in his small, fierce voice, "Go away! I don’t want you! I want Daddy and Y/nnie!"

The raw honesty in Minjun’s voice seems to hit Yejun hard. For a moment, her resolve wavers, her features softening as she looks at her son. But the bitterness and resentment are too deep, her expression hardening once again.

“You’re disgusting,” she says toward Minho who stares at her quietly. “One day, he’ll leave you just like he left me,” she tells Minjun, who whimpers, clinging to him. 

“You’re such a bitch,” you tell her and stare her down until she storms off. “You forgot your stuff!” you call out for her and she spins around, stomping back to get it. 

“Fuck you.” With that, she turns sharply and storms out of the café, leaving behind a heavy silence. 

Minho kneels down, wiping the tears from Minjun’s cheeks. "It’s okay, buddy. She’s gone now. You’re safe," he murmurs, his voice soothing.

Minjun sniffles, nodding as he leans into Minho’s embrace. "Stay with me, Daddy. Stay with Y/nnie."

"We will, Minjun. We’re not going anywhere," Minho reassures him. “Always back to you, remember my sweet boy?”

“Yes, Daddy,” he nods bravely.

-

Back at the company Minho walks straight to Chan's studio, telling you to go and get some snacks with Minjun first. He closes the door behind himself and starts cursing as soon as it clicks shut. “I swear that woman is insane! I don't know what the fuck I saw in her but it's gone!”

Chan slowly pulls off his headphones and Jisung clicks his pen, blinking at Minho worriedly. “Mate, what happened?” Chan asks gently. 

“Yejun happened!” Minho snaps. “She just tried to pull Minjun away from me so he'd go with her! She called him a weak, clingy child for wanting to stay with me!” 

“Okay, take a deep breath,” Chan says soothingly. 

“I don't feel like taking a deep breath right now,” he says fuming with anger. 

Changbin picks up a pillow and throws it at him. “Scream into that for a moment. Let it all out. You haven't told us much but I suspect Minjun needs his father to be calm now.” Minho blinks at them stunned before doing as they say, his scream getting muffled by the pillow. “Better?”

“A little,” he nods, making them all laugh. Minho flops down onto the sofa between Changbin and Jisung, huffing softly. Then he tells them about everything that happened, all of them growing quiet, exchanging shocked glances. 

“Not to be that type of person but..I never liked her,” Jisung snorts and Minho hums agreeingly. 

“I know…but I wouldn't want to miss the time I had with her. I'd miss my little boy,” he sighs and rubs his face. 

“If she starts causing trouble you let me know, alright?” Chan asks. “Everyone of us can tell whoever needs to know that you've always been there for him and raised him well so far.”

“Thanks, hyung,” he smiles gently, looking up as the door opens and you and Minjun enter the room. Minjun runs up to everyone handing them their favorite snack and smiles proudly at the many encouragement he gets. Minho scoots over and pats the space next to himself, gently tapping your hand to make you sit. 

“Can I talk to you for a second?” you ask and Minho nods, getting up quickly. 

As soon as you leave the room Minjun climbs into Chan's lap and nibbles on his chocolate. “Exciting day?” Chan asks gently. 

“No. Yejun’s a bitch,” he announces dryly. Chan bites back a laugh and Jisung nods proudly. 

“Woah, that's a strong word,” Changbin laughs. “Did your daddy teach you that?”

“No, Y/nnie,” he tells them. 

“You like staying with your daddy more, right?” Chan asks amused. 

“And Y/nnie,” he nods happily. “Y/nnie and Daddy.”

“Yeah? Y/nnie stays with you a lot,” Jisung agrees. 

“Daddy loves Y/nnie.”

“Loves?” he asks curiously. 

Minjun nods and leans up to Chan, kissing his cheek. “They did that.”

Chan giggles, exchanging a glance with his friends. “They kissed?” he asks curiously. 

“Mhm,” he nods and continues munching his chocolate. “But not there,” he says, pointing at Chan's cheek. 

“No?” Chan asks stunned. 

“No. Like uncle Lix and you,” he announces making the whole room go silent. 

“You mean here?” Chan asks, pointing at his lips. 

“Yes,” Minjun nods. “Y/nnie is my new mum.”

“That's so cute,” Jisung whispers, smiling at him adoringly. 

The door opens and you two are back from your short talk about everything that happened. You sense something's off, judging by the way the three are glancing from Minho to you and back again. “Minjunnie, are you ready to go home?” you ask him. “Daddy has to work but he'll come later.”

“Work?” Minjun asks heartbreakingly timid. 

“I'm sorry, baby,” Minho tries, swallowing hard as Minjun climbs off Chan's lap and walks over to him, his small face scrunching up. Minho scoops him up, hugging him tightly. "I'll be back before you know it, okay? And Y/nnie will be with you," he reassures, glancing over at you with a grateful smile.

Minjun seems somewhat calmed by this, nestling his head against Minho's shoulder. "Promise?" he mumbles, his voice muffled.

"I promise, buddy," Minho affirms, pressing a kiss to his son's hair.

You can't help but feel a pang of warmth at the scene, your heart swelling at the depth of their bond. As you prepare to leave with Minjun, Minho sets him down, adjusting his little backpack and smoothing down his hair.

"Be good for Y/nnie, okay?" Minho instructs, kneeling to be eye level with Minjun.

"I will," Minjun nods solemnly, then looks up at you with those big, trusting eyes. "Let's go, Y/nnie."

As you lead Minjun out of the studio, his hand in yours, you glance back to see Minho watching you both, a mix of love and a tinge of sorrow in his eyes. It's clear how torn he feels, the duties of his work pulling him away from moments he cherishes with his son.

Back at Minho’s house, the evening unfolds with a quiet kind of normalcy. Minjun plays with his toys in the living room, occasionally chatting about things he remembers from the day or asking questions about what tomorrow might bring. You keep your answers light and reassuring, mindful of the emotional turmoil he’s endured.

Later, while Minjun is absorbed in a cartoon, you step into the kitchen to prepare a simple dinner, your thoughts wandering back to Minho. The way he had leaned into your kiss, the vulnerability he showed—it all painted a picture of a man deeply in love but equally scared of the implications. Your heart aches for him, wishing there was more you could do to ease his fears.

As you set the table, Minjun comes running into the kitchen, his earlier worries seemingly forgotten in the wake of his current excitement about the cartoon.

"Y/nnie, did you see? The superhero saved everyone!" he exclaims, his eyes sparkling.

"I saw that, buddy. It was pretty cool, wasn’t it?" you smile, lifting him onto a chair.

"Yeah! I wanna be like that," Minjun declares, his chest puffing out proudly.

"I think you're already a hero, Minjun. You know that?" you say, ruffling his hair.

He giggles, beaming up at you. "Really?"

"Really," you affirm, serving him his dinner.

Dinner passes with playful chatter, and soon it's time for Minjun's bedtime. As you tuck him into bed, he hugs his beloved bunny. 

"Daddy comes home soon?" Minjun’s voice is small, tinged with the weight of his earlier tears.

"He promised, didn’t he? And your daddy always keeps his promises," you reassure him, smoothing down the blanket. “Did you know your daddy's animal of the group is a bunny?”

Minjun nods proudly. “Yes.”

“There are plushies of his bunny, just like yours here. Would you like one?” you ask gently and Minjun nods with wide eyes. “Then you can cuddle it if he's not here.”

Minjun nods contently, curling up with the plushie. "Night, Y/nnie."

"Goodnight, Minjun. Sweet dreams," you whisper, turning off the light and leaving the door slightly ajar.

Once Minjun is asleep, you sink onto the couch, the quiet of the house settling around you. You're startled by the sound of the front door opening—Minho is home.

He looks exhausted, the lines of his face deeper, his eyes shadowed. But when he sees you, a smile, tired yet genuine, crosses his lips.

"Hey," he greets softly, dropping his keys into the bowl by the door.

"Hey," you reply, standing to meet him. "Rough day?"

"You could say that," Minho sighs, pulling you into a hug. It's a long, tight embrace, one that speaks volumes.

As you pull back, you hold his gaze. "Talk to me," you encourage.3

Minho shakes his head slightly, a weary chuckle escaping him. "Just the usual chaos. But coming back to this—coming back to you—it helps more than you might think."

Your heart skips a beat at his words, the simplicity of his statement underscoring the depth of your growing bond. "I'm glad," you murmur, your hands resting on his arms.

"We didn't get much time earlier... to talk about... us," Minho hesitates, searching your face for signs of what you might be feeling.

"No, we didn’t," you agree, feeling the momentous weight of the conversation that looms between you. "But we’re here now. We can talk."

Minho nods, taking a deep breath. "I meant what I said earlier, before everything with Yejun. I love you, Y/nnie. I know it’s complicated, and I know my life is... a lot. But I want you in it, in every way."

The earnestness in his voice, the open vulnerability—he’s offering you his heart, and it’s yours to take. You smile, your decision clear. "I love you too, Minho. And I’m in this. All of it, with you," you say.

The relief that washes over Minho's face is evident. He pulls you close again, his lips finding yours in a kiss that seals the promise of a future together, come what may. In that moment, wrapped up in each other, the challenges that lie ahead seem manageable. With love as your anchor, you both feel ready to face whatever comes next, together.

PART THREE | PART FIVE

MASTERLISTS | PROMPT LIST | GUIDELINES

Taglist (Please let me know if you want to be added to or removed from the taglist):

@atinyniki @galaxycatdrawz @silverstarburst @aaa-sia @lilmisssona @kthstrawberryshortcake @channieaddict @soullostinspaceandtime @rebecca-johnson-28 @lixie-phoria @kibs-and-bits @xxstrayland @ihrtlix @pheonixfire777 @mellhwang @palindrome969 @michelle4eve @harshaaaaa @rylea08 @heeyboooo @manuosorioh @gisaerlleri @andassortedkpop @lailac13 @bbokari711 @kazuuuaaa @rssamj @wolfyychan @stellasays45 @chrizzztopherbang @ionlyeverwantedtobeyourequal @silentreadersthings @myforevermelody143 @sapphirewaves @lost-in-avoidance @moonchild9350 @spicxbnny @queer-possum @james-is-here @roriiror @minholover1 @cb97s-laptop @iknowyouknowminho @iatethem @constrellar

[leechanpremacy]

People You Know

After the death of his wife, he starts a whole new life in a whole new city with his three year old twins only to meet someone from his past. What a way to start something new, right?

pairings: psychiatrist!jeonghan, parent!jeonghan x doctor!reader petowner!reader

tags: fluff, crack, slow burn, exes to lovers, romance, angst (if you think into it really deeply), swearings

word count:

notes: i’ve been dreading to write jeonghan as a parent of twins, now having the motivation and inspiration to write the plot, IM ON CLOUD NINE!!! lmao i’m also planning on posting this as an au on twitter if time, and motivation persists as my alter ego’s such a lazy ass bitch that takes at least half a month to find motivation to do updates on on-going twitter series’ THIS might also be turned in to a series (fuck, my mingyu series long forgotten 💀)

prologue | masterlist | two

Yoon Jeonghan was a person whom you can't forget. You let yourself relish his new appearance. Long gone was the long slick hair he sported back in college. His short haircut with his bang fringes poking his eyes made him look somewhat younger. His cheeks are more defined than you can remember, and his bright doe eyes that were healthy before now have bags underneath, finally noticing the mole you adorned long ago.

It seems that he did the same, as his lips narrowed open, shock still painted on his face as his eyes traveled around your face. The only thing that woke you two up from your daydream was, "Dada!" Two of the kids ran towards Jeonghan to hug him by his legs.

Stumbling a bit from the impact, his eyes lingered a bit longer from you before turning his attention to the two children, crouching down to hug them and mumble a few words.

Blinking a few more times, let it sink in that the two children that ran towards you and your dog were, Jeonghan's children. A small smile formed on your lips, "You're a dad now, huh?" You softly said, still wearing the small smile as you locked eyes with him again.

"They're twins, Yuna and Yejun. They're turning four this year." He replies, standing up again whilst holding both on his sides. Your eyes then drifted to the two, taking a closer look. Knowing that these were his children, you were suddenly intrigued to see who they took after.

You were guessing that you were staring at the twins a bit longer than you intended as you heard Jeonghan introduce you as one of their aunts. "Hi! You guys still want to touch her?" Pointing to your dog, piquing their attention again. You saw both of them look up to Jeonghan, asking for permission before running towards your crouching figure to pet your dog, Manju.

You still held your dog by its snout, letting the children pet his body. "Is that..?" You could tone of hesitance in his voice. Without meeting his eyes, "It's her daughter, she passed a year ago." Whilst shaking your head, quickly patting Manju's head making it lean to your hand, wanting more.

"Oh," You watched the two children giggling to themselves as they kept on patting your dog's body which Manju enjoys, noticing the rapid wag of her tail with each stroke that the twins make.

"She looks just like her," Jeonghan mumbles, making you slightly jolt from your position as you didn't notice him crouching down next to you to pat Manju's head.

"She acts like her too. Not that much of a people pleaser dog." You joked, hearing him chuckle again after how many years. "Then I guess Michi must've told her about me then." He softly says, making you look at him.

Michi, - your current dog, Manju's, mother - you and Jeonghan's lovebug. Just the mention of your passed dod makes your heart swell and Jeonahan's presence makes it a lot worse. You felt tears building up in your eyes, causing you to break free from Jeonghan's eyes.

You still weren't over grieving from the loss of your best friend. She was the only one who stayed with you from that dreadful college years up to your med school. She stayed longer than anyone could have, and that's why you weren't done grieving even if she was already gone for a year. "Dada," One called, capturing both of your attention.

It's somehow sweet that someone you knew is now being called like that. So sweet and soft, enough to you feel blue. How would it feel to be called by your child? You thought.

"I'm sorry, Y/N, I have to go. I still have some stuff to unpack. We just moved here in the city." Is Jeonghan effortlessly picking up both his kids, "Moved? Here?" You asked, quite shocked at the news. As far as you remember, he moved to a larger city to pursue law. Was he retired?

"Yeah," Sporting a smile that you remembered like the back of your hand, "See you around?" He adds, walking away from you.

You suddenly felt a wave of emotions rushing through your body. You didn't even have the chance to bid him goodbye as you were too busy relishing the smile he wore before he walked away.

It must be the nostalgia, making you feel emotions you thought were long gone. Seeing him again after a few years, with his own little family made you happy. Finally seeing him smile again after you broke his heart when you walked away from him that night.

“I’m telling you Seungcheol, I didn’t know she lived here!” Jeonghan dramatically says through the phone as he folded their clean clothes to store it in their closet.

“I’m not even saying anything! It’s you who’s overreacting, not me!” Rolling his eyes, “Oh you fucker, don’t get me started with your scoffs and stifled laughs!” Sighing, Jeonghan was left hopeless upon hearing his friend’s laughter echo through the room.

“Can you shut the fuck up? My children are asleep.” Jeonghan had his lips curved into an annoyed smirk, “I can see you glaring from here ya’ know?”

“On the brighter side, isn’t it nice to have a familiar face in an unfamiliar environment? Plus, you could ask Y/N to babysit the twins on October,” Seungcheol finally calmed down, giving Jeonghan a few grounded words.

“I think you don’t get the whole concept of ‘let’s not see each other again’ here, Choi Seungcheol.” He could hear his friend groaning on the full name, “Dumbass! She meant it to be - not being in a relationship! Not - literally not! Seeing! Each other! So much for topping the boards,” Jeonghan heard the last part but paid no attention. He knows that too. That you didn’t mean it to literally not see each other’s face. But at that time, he had no face to meet you even if you were the one who called it off. Too hurt to even see you from afar. Too bruised to even hear from you.

“I also don’t think were in a relationship where I can just ask her to babysit my twins because unfortunately, my first day of work is on my birthday!” Jeonghan can imagine Seungcheol shaking his head at him. “I also don’t have her number.” There was a long stretch of silence before he could hear Seungcheol’s sigh.

“Y/N, she didn’t changed her number. I’m sure you still have it.” Having his breath hitched, he stopped functioning for a while, “Don’t be such a sussy Han, it’s all in the past. Besides, you got married. All your unresolved feelings for Y/N should either be gone or just waiting to be answered.”

“Yeah. I guess so.”

Sweat running down your forehead as you reached your kitchen’s counter top, almost flopping yourself just to reach the fridge. Not even minding to get a glass to pour water on. You don’t know why embarrassment is only hitting you now. How embarrassing on acting so casual with someone you left in the dark, as if you didn’t leave him hanging during your third year on college.

Wiping your lips that had excess water dripping down to your chin, you had your gaze hardened on the wall. How can he possibly talk to you when he avoided you at all cost after the breakup? Even hearing from his friends that he would always change the topic when it somehow swerved to you.

Just then, you heard your phone ding, immediately checking just in case it was a text from the hospital.

Heaving a sigh, you quickly typed in ‘otw’, scurrying away to your room to fix yourself before going back to the hospital.

“Doc, we’ve already calmed him down. His vitals are slowly coming back to normal.” The nurse informed you as you briskly walked towards the said patient’s warden. You just nodded in acknowledgment, slowly forgetting the incident earlier.

Being an general doctor was a pain, especially if most of your current patients are alcoholic. No matter how many nags and warnings you told them, they just don’t listen. Now, one of your patients who recently received a liver from his daughter went on a drinking spree. Now that his his newly transplanted liver almost gave up, you can feel stress working up its way to your head - almost giving you migraine like headaches just by the thoughtless behavior the old man lying on the bed portrayed.

The door swings open, gaining your attention, you then saw the wife and their daughter and you can’t help but feel bad for them. They just paid hundred thousands just to pay the hospital bills from the surgery and now, their patriarch had a surge of major side effects from the alcohol content he consumed.

“He consumed too much alcohol, that the liver almost gave up since it was still adjusting with his body. Good thing he was brought here immediately. He’s already stable. He needs to be monitored for a span of two weeks at least, just to make sure his liver won’t act out again.” You explained sternly to the family who only nodded and kept thanking you for saving the man again.

Heaving a big sigh as you closed the door to the room, you held your head, trying to rub the pain out. “Did you even sleep?” A familiar voice chirped beside you, “What do you think?” You said sarcastically before making your way to the headquarters.

“Judging by the way you tried to rub your temples and your mean attitude, you didn’t even sleep a wink with your uhm,” You could hear him counting in a small voice, “Three hours free time.” Halting, you quickly turned to him, making his squinted eyes go round.

“Did you know Jeonghan had kids?” You genuinely asks. The latter furrowed his brows, searching any other reaction from you. “Yeah..” Still trying to see if you’d react in any way other than relief washing down your face.

“Glad he found someone that’ll take care of him.” You said with a smile. You were about to turn when you halted from his words, “You.. Did you not know?” Confusion then etched both your faces.

“Know what, Hoshi?” He pursed his lips, contemplating whether to tell you or not, “What ‘cha guys doin’?” Dino’s voice erupted from your back. Dino noticed Hoshi’s panicking gaze but you didn’t remove your eyes on the latter.

You felt Dino’s presence beside you but you paid no attention to him, “Hoshi, what is it?” You asked again, more curious and fraught on his answer.

“What is what?” Dino joined causing you to whip his head to him. “What do you know about Jeonghan?” You asked him, catching him off-guard.

“I just know he moved here in the city, and he’s planning to start working here on October.” Furrowing your brows more, “What’s this about? Why’re you suddenly asking things about him?” You were too lost in your thoughts to answer him.

Didn’t he want to pursue law? Why would he work here at the hospital? Or will he work here as a legal guidance? Legal advisor? Didn’t he go to larger city so he could expand his connections?

Dino was now frowning at you, looking towards Hoshi with a questioning look. The latter shrugged and shook his head, also unaware of her sudden interest towards Jeonghan.

You raised you head again, now looking to Dino who had his one brow raised, already knowing what you’re going to ask, “You didn’t asked. And we thought you wouldn’t like to hear any news from him. Be it good or bad.”

“Yeah. Totally learned my lesson that one time.” Hoshi added. You frowned at your two friends - who was unfortunately, friends with Jeonghan also.

You and Jeonghan weren’t in the same circle before, it just happened that your friends and his friends clicked that much for it to become one. You still were in contact with some of his friends, but you took courtesy of not asking things about him and they respected that by not sharing anything too, without you asking.

“I met him earlier at the park. Also met his twins. He casually talked to me, and it made me feel anxious. He wasn’t like that when I last heard from him, wasn’t he angry anymore?” You ranted, lying on the bed as you munched your caramelized popcorn.

“Maybe? It’s been like what? Seven years? It must’ve dried out during those past years.” Closing his book before turning to face your lying body on the bunk bed. “Besides Y/N, why are you so worried about him working here? Do you not want him to be here that much?”

“No, its not that. It’s just, Wonwoo, I inflicted pain, he should be angry!” You kept refuting the same thing over and over again.

“Y/N, if there’s anything that he’ll feel about you, anger is far from it. He’s healed from the pain, he learned and he moved on. I’m sure his wife took care of him well. Isn’t that what you want? Someone to take good care of him?” You halted from Wonwoo’s words. You couldn’t help but look at the bed above you, letting out a smile as you imagined Jeonghan being taken care of well.

As soon as you felt tears suddenly welling up on your eyes, you did your best to refrain them from pouring out. “Yeah, I did.” It was so soft, Wonwoo would’ve missed it if there was other noises aside from the aircon’s ringing. “Did you attend his wedding?” You asked, with a softer voice.

Wonwoo was taken aback by the sudden change of demeanor, “..No, I couldn’t. It was during our OB-residency.” He could see you quietly nod and the red tip of your nose. He could sense immense emotions from you, but he kept quiet about it. He knows its something you don’t ever want to talk about. Most likely, you will never talk about it to them, finally knowing Jeonghan had marry already.

a/n: being this active on writing is kinda worrying me lol i think if i did another chapter, it’d probably be posted in the next two months 😬

[placeofplave]

Headcanon: Plave having a crush

{finally ready to write, I’ve been trying to grasp their personalities for a few days now lol}

Yejun:

Super nervous around his crush , he’s bumping into stuff, and knocking it over .

He tries to speak confidently but he always ends up stuttering .

Sometimes it’s hard for him to control his volume as well . One moment he’s speaking so low you have to lean into him, the next he accidentally raises his voice.

Honestly calls it quits for the day and sulks in the corner, head in his hands as Noah gives him a lecture on how he should improve.

If you wish to speak to him again, y’all have to be the first to approach , because he’s way to embarrassed to try again. 

Noah:

Mr . Suave, or at least he likes to think so .

He confidently sparks up a conversation, quickly taking note of your reaction .

If his boldness makes you uncomfortable he’ll tone it down.

If you match his energy , it might catch him by surprise . So he turns a bit shy .

If you have a similar interest , he might try to play it off like he knows more then he truly does. Only because he’s trying to impress you.

Tries to sneak in a random way to flex, like he’ll drop his phone under the table and then tries to lift the whole thing just to grab it .

He knows it’s silly but he can’t help it. And hey if it makes you laugh more points for him.

Bamby:

Seems a bit stand offish when you first meet him .

He doesn’t say much but always glances at you .

Truth is he doesn’t know what to say , he hopes maybe y’all say something or do something that gives him a natural opportunity to speak to you.

When that time does come , he’s still a man of few words but that’s just because it takes him a while to warm up. .

When he speaks to you his ears are just slightly red. When someone else is speaking with the two of you , his eyes always focus on you even if you’re not the one speaking. .

Every time you try to catch him, he looks away.

Eunho:

Sparks up a conversation by using questions .

He wants to get to know you as soon as possible .

Because of this speaking with him is quite easy, since most of the time he leads the conversation.

When you’re speaking though you have his full attention. Another member might call his name but he barely hears them since he’s so infatuated with the talk you two are having .

He tries to act cool around you , showing off his dancing skills by doing dance challenges( rOveR ROvEr rOVeR) .

Over does it just a bit. He’ll get second hand embarrassment when thinking back on it later .

Hamin:

Another quiet guy when you meet him .

If you’re off doing your own thing he always stands close by ,just in case you need any help.

Silently shows off. if you glance his way or complement him , he give you his best smiles and offers to teach you .

Prefers when you do most of the talking, but is always quick with giving an answer when one is called for. He also always cracks sudden jokes. So you both quickly gather a lot of inside jokes.

The rest of the members are always trying to give him tips on how to talk to you. He listens well but honestly feels like he doesn’t need help. He’s happy with the pace you are both going at.

Thanks for reading 💙

[strawberrickys]

hi I saw u write for epex too and I'm absolutely in to them these days. if u don't mind could u write epex members when u fall asleep on them (before dating)

aaa plz i love epex 😭 yesyes this is so cute

im doing this in bullet points, hope you don't mind ❤️ if you wanted headcanons or if you want me to elaborate on any of them plz don't be afraid to ask! — not proofread, lowercase intended

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epex — falling asleep on them !! (pre-relationship)

×× 곽 다윗 —★ kwak dawit ! wish ···

• will let you sleep unless you look uncomfortable 💀

• hes probably used to his members leaning on him and sleeping on him all the time but.. you??

• oh he's a wreck

• wants you to be comfortable and if it looks like you're in pain even in the slightest he will move you or wake you up

• overall just wants you to rest well, doesn't care that you're leaning on him

×× 금 동현 —★ keum donghyun ! keum ···

• 100% confused and WILL wake you up 💀

• "do you want to sleep? i can come back another time"

• vv worried and wants to know if you're getting enough sleep

• if you tell him you are actually tired he would be so conflicted

• he wants to spend time with you but he wants you to sleep

• prob just ends up letting you sleep on him after, win-win lol

×× 서 경민 —★ seo kyungmin ! mu ···

• will not intentionally wake you up but the second your head hits his shoulder he tenses up enough to scare both him AND you 💀

• will apologize and let you sleep on him ☹️

• WILL take photos of you but will 100% delete them if you don't like them lol

• texting EVERYONE for moral support

• "omg omg guys they're sleeping on me what do i do help help help" but no matter what anyone says he's not gonna move you until you wake up

• has ruined your sleep before, will not let it happen again 💀

×× 조 민우 —★ cho minwoo ! a-min ···

• confused but will let you sleep

• will 100% just. look at you.

• not like out of adoration but like why are you sleeping in the middle of the day and why on me look (out of adoration too)

• eventually understands because he's had his moments too

• might look at something on his phone and laugh a little too loud 💀

• will apologize even if you don't hear him or wake up lol

×× 김 현우 —★ kim hyunwoo ! baekseung ···

• nervous and will tell everyone who walks in the room to be quiet 💀

• will make sure you stay asleep because he wants you to rest and he needs to calm down

• will be vv sweet and will ask one of the members to bring you a blanket or something

• he won't hear but said member will walk away grumbling about how whipped he is

• v soft and just wants you to be warm and happy ☹️ need

×× 권 예준 —★ kwon yejun ! ayden ···

• will try to wake you up, ultimately fails, doesn't try again 💀

• "why me and why now." FEAR. someone help this boy 😭

• thinks that you meant to fall asleep on him and will get delusional /lhj

• will not be able to function until you wake up, whatever he was doing has been long abandoned

• might fall asleep too ngl 💀

×× 서 예왕 —★ seo yewang ! yewang ···

• takes him a second to realize what's going on but will let you sleep lol

• will try to wake you up but when you don't he won't push it

• if you're tired, you're tired, and he wants you to rest

• (so you guys can actually hang out 😭💀)

• will watch you and will make sure you're still sleeping and not just leaning on him to make him nervous 💀

×× 이 재호 —★ lee jaeho ! jeff ···

• you have broken him. congratulations.

• the most scared of them all a literal chill would run down his spine I think 😭

• would be 100% still and would NOT move

• will totally wake you up out of fear plz help him ☹️

• he'd wake you up like yejun but will not give up until you wake up 💀

• will ask you why you fell asleep on him but totally didn't mean to lol

• his ears are bright red please dont mention them he already knows

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thank you for reading this far! ❤️ feedback, likes, and reblogs are always appreciated.

— strawberrickys, 2023.