#and now I'm rereading the books and I need to get some arsene stuff to read

[not-poignant]

Hello Pia.

Hope you are well.

Your writing is incredible but I was wondering if you ever struggle with things like self doubt or anxiety around writing, or not feeling like your ideas/writing is good enough? Do you have any advice on how to deal with feelings of inadequacy as a writer?

Thanks.

Hi anon!

I struggle with that kind of stuff all the time (in fact I'm struggling with it right now because the latest TIP chapter did so badly). I actually think of myself as quite a mediocre/average writer who occasionally has some good moments, and I think I'm very lucky that other people enjoy my writing. I can't take for granted that they will. I'm scared with every new chapter, and story, that it might flop terribly and I might just have to walk away. There have been times - usually several times a year - I contemplate deleting both of my accounts, all of my works, and just quitting writing and the Patreon for good.

There's no sure-fire way to make it go away forever, at least as far as I know, especially if you have a mental illness issue on top of that (of which I have several). Mostly it's about learning different tips and tricks that might help.

A lot of the things in this post can be really helpful. Especially rereading through favourite parts of your writing or, if you put it up online, looking over comments etc. Everyone has different ways of dealing with anxiety. Some people read their favourite books and remind themselves what they're aiming for. Some people read terrible books and remind themselves 'hey if this person could get published, I can make it too even with terrible writing' (not going to lie, I've used this one - the whole 'well even if it's terrible someone is going to like it' has kept my writing job alive, lol).

Because writing is my job, I have to keep writing even when I feel really awful about it (which is not much fun). I don't know if you're doing this just for fun, in which case you can take breaks and go easier on yourself during those moments.

Re: Feelings of inadequacy, the first thing is it's a very normal part of writing, I think pretty much everyone goes through it (those who don't are, I believe, very lucky people lol). It's normal to worry that what you're doing isn't good enough, or that no one will like it, or see things you don't like about it. Often, because you're so close to the project, it's hard to have perspective on it too. So often I hear people say 'I haven't read my own writing in years because I thought it was bad, but when I read it, I was surprised how much of it I really liked.'

One trick that I know works for quite a few people is just to imagine they had a friend who really enjoyed writing but sometimes felt insecure or doubtful. What would they say to their friend? What would they want their friend to feel like? Chances are they'd want to support and reassure their friend, and tell them to take it easy if they need a break, and to keep going otherwise if they still enjoy it, and that everyone has hard times with their own writing.

You'll eventually find an arsenal of your own tricks, tools and supports you can pull on when you feel like this. But I don't think anything will stop the feelings themselves from coming, and sometimes hitting hard. I sometimes distract myself from writing too - I might watch something, or do something else for a while, just get my head out of writing for a few hours.

But yeah, I don't know if this post has been very helpful, I apologise. Definitely check out that link, which will have some things you can try. And you're in good company, every writer you've ever liked has felt the way you're feeling right now about their writing. Sending *hugs* - I hope this doesn't last long, and I hope you find some good ways to look after yourself when it happens again in the future.

[nebulousneko]

Me thinking about Magic Kaito: wow I sure do love this