#and next july will be mcfly july 5
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✨Last Day of McFly July!!✨
🎸⚡️AH! Thank you to everyone who took part in McFly July this year!!! 🕰️⚡️
Is it just me, or is this community getting more skillful and creative than ever? I found myself invested in everyone's fics and art this month in a way that blew away all Julys before. And your dedication! What!!!
BIG shoutout to: @arumidden @daryfromthefuture @bg-sparrow (and @bgsbracelets) @pinwheel-plant @moonlightandstarshimmer and @doctorbrown
for completing every single day's prompt--and this year there were DOUBLE the prompts, so you get DOUBLE the acclaim!!! Like are you kidding me? That's 62 pieces of fanart or fanfic from each of you. ARE YOU KIDDING?
I am flabbergasted and overjoyed with the support and love and hours of time and hard work you all have put into this project. Whether you participated one day, three days, or the whole month, I am so grateful to have you here and I hope you had fun! 🧡
If you weren't able to complete all the prompts you wanted to, you are not alone! Some folks will be working through them in August. I’ll keep an eye out in the #mcflyjuly tag for you!!
Until next year! 🌲🌲
#and next july will be mcfly july 5#and the 40th anniversary of bttf#god help us all. i'm wheezing#i wish i could throw a party to celebrate--this year was INSANE!#AHHH!!#you guys are incredible <3 I can't say thank you enough#mcflyjuly#oh my gosh! and i WILL be designing stickers again this year! i will post when they're ready#will also post about the potential art swap and resurgence of bttfbffs!#mcflaugust here we come!
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3, 9, and 10 for Johnny Mcfly please and thank you
Let's Fucking Go !!!! ok I wanna preface this by saying that if you do not know who Johnny Mcfly is. Go Here. go in the link.
So . for number 3 which is childhood . Let's do some math first. Johnny Mcfly died ("in a car crash") 5 years before The Return Of Johnny Mcfly takes place, which based on the release date, we can assume it's 2007. Therefore, Johnny Mcfly can be assumed to have died on July 7, 2002. Since Patrick Ryan's Unnamed Character refers to him as "That Kid" we can assume Johnny was likely in his adolescence at the time of death. I would think somewhere around 16-18, give or take. That would mean Johnny spent most of his childhood in the nineties. smiles
So what was the point of that math? Well I don't know. but the important thing is this . I imagine Johnny as being a sort of hostile kid . Just kind of has that vibe of someone who Doesnt want to talk and has never wanted to talk . Aimlessly Bitter most if not all of the time in a way that makes you think "Is this kid mentally ill or something" And hey, maybe! [evil transgender propaganda voice] Perhaps Transition Could Alleviate Some Of These Emotions
ok number nine is about Clothes and habits of dress. smiles grinnishly (<-guy who likes to think about costuming). So the first thing we see of johnny is that he is wearing relatively baggy pants and no shoes. Now, it's heavily implied that Johnny Mcfly did not actually die in a car crash, but rather He Killed Himself . (what with the neck scarring and the "is that what my parents told everybody?" and the fact that kevin james literally said "he committed suicide I think." in the comments of the video). Taking off one's shoes before committing suicide is a sort of common thing in Japan. Go My Excerpt
But let's get back to the shoe question. A spokesperson at the National Police Agency confirmed it's common for suicides to remove their shoes, but far from universal. There have been some high-profile shoeless suicides, like film director Juzo Itami, who reportedly left his shoes behind when he jumped to his death in 1997. Do the police keep statistics on this? "No, there's no point. We factor that in when determining whether the death was a suicide [if the shoes were deliberately removed the death is deemed less likely to have been an accident or murder]. Other than that, it's irrelevant." I asked several people why Japanese might feel the urge to remove their shoes before committing suicide. Some had expertise in the psychology of suicide, some did not. The theories included the following: so as not to carry dirt from this world into the next; to indicate that the death was a suicide; to increase the chances of the body being found; because that's what samurai used to do; and because it's what they've seen on TV (it's a cliche in television dramas to indicate a suicide by showing a pair of shoes on a cliff or the roof of a building). The most neurotic rationale offered, by quite a few women who have obviously spent too many years lining up shoes in entranceways, was that it's better to remove one's shoes than have them come off during the fall and land in some embarrassingly untidy way.
Now you may ask yourself, "Jingles, aren't they in, like, Massachusetts? and not Japan?" And truly I say to you Well Yeah. However. There are two modes of explanation for this and they arent mutually exclusive. we have the doylistic sentiment of We have the knowledge that Ryan Murphy (who played Johnny Mcfly) Likes More Than One Anime. so possibly this Idea was carried into TROJM. we also have the watsonian idea that Well maybe Johnny Mcfly was an animepilled animecel or something. Both are good. I think both can coexist.
I'm not done with costuming. I can't find the exact shirt that he was wearing (sad!) but I was able to find one that was very similar
I don't have any deep analysis on the power rangers shirt. I just wanted to mention that . it's cool johnny mcfly has a power rangers shirt. I like to imagine he got it at one of those thrift stores with the bins
Number Ten is about. Posture/physicality/movement. Now If You'll Notice. Johnny Mcfly stutters on about 4 of his 6 lines. holy shit hold on I just realized im writing all of htis on a character with like 6 lines give me a second. ok where was I. oh yeah . Johnny Mcfly can a little dyspraxia. as a treat . for me. Yes, I Know he isnt the only one who stutters a lot in that video. but let me play tuoys(neurology). Furthermore he does this (below) like thrice throughout the video and . well this is an observation more than a headcanon but i like this Mannerism. grins smilishly
anyway in conclusion rest in peace johnny mcfly you would've loved estrogen. and bad apple (song).
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MCFLY JULY ‘24 ⸺ 「 20 / 31 * LOCAL LEGEND 」
December 5, 2000, 22:54
1646 Riverside Drive, Hill Valley, California
Divergence: Twin Pines(α) — %.5382217
“Doc!!” Marty shouts, leaning so far back in the chair that, for a moment, he experiences that panic-inducing sensation of falling that has him scrabbling for the edge of the desk as his life flashes before his eyes. “Doc, he’s on! Joseph Cabret! He responded to our email! Get over here!”
Emmett grunts his acknowledgement, casting one last long look at the mess of wires hooked into the housing of the Flux Capacitor before he drags a second chair over to the computer. The cursor is already in place over the single unread email in the box and Emmett can see Marty’s finger twitching in anticipation, his eyes glued to the screen.
“Go ahead, Marty,” he prompts, only barely finishing the word go before the email pops open to an intimidating wall of black text. Marty whistles, scrolling down to the bottom of what looks like a very long-winded, very complicated scientific dissertation regarding alleged time-travel that reminds him of most of the papers scattered around the garage right now.
Dear 1.21_Jigowatts,
Emmett groans upon seeing their ridiculous username come back to haunt them in the reply and Marty throws him a lopsided grin and a shrug that says it’s way too late to change it now, Doc.
“It’s the Internet, Doc—who cares? Nobody knows who we are.”
That is the last time he lets Marty pick the name for something without reviewing it first.
Before I address everything you wrote in your email to me, I wanted to comment on your username. Were you aware of its significance in relation to time travel when you joined the forum or did you simply happen upon it by chance? Could it be that you’re a time-traveller too?
If so, I’d love to share stories while we can.
I’ve been getting a lot of questions about the future, often all limited by the scope of your present time asking for answers to inconsequential things. The next election results, lottery numbers, things of that nature, as if that’ll verify my time-traveller status. And while I can’t say I’m surprised—I’ve studied your current time carefully and unfortunately, your time is remembered for being one of the most chaotic and selfish, so it’s not like I can fault those who ask—there are some, like yourself, who have been asking complex and meaningful questions that show a genuine interest in the possible future and in time-travel that I’m all too happy to answer, as best as I can.
To answer your simplest question first, the reason I stopped in this time is an entirely selfish one. Where I’m from, most of the people I care about have been killed. There was someone very important to my Dad and my family who was killed when I was very young that I wanted to finally meet. I know he's alive now, so I'm here. Even if you think it’s a waste of time, remember that time is of no consequence with the time machine.
Now, to the bulk of this message. I see you’re intimately familiar with the Everett-Wheeler model of quantum physics, which saves me a lot of explaining. You must be a man of science. That model is correct. When I say worldline, I refer to what you’d call an ‘alternate reality’ or an ‘alternate timeline.’ So, each individual worldline represents a set of paths and limits—possibilities, if you would—taken through space-time. These are all subject to the laws of special relativity. No two are exactly the same.
There is a device installed in my time machine that measures the change in each worldline I visit. Its inventor is dead, so I can’t tell you too much about how it works other than a general overview and how to read it, but from what I understand, it collects information from the ‘current’ worldline and uses that to establish a baseline. Then, upon the next jump, a second reading is taken of the new worldline and measured against the first one. The difference—or Divergence, as the device’s creator named it—is expressed in percentages. That's how I know.
The email continues on for several more paragraphs, each delving deeper and deeper into the realm of quantum mechanics with lengthy, detailed answers provided to each question they'd asked in their initial email. A dull ache throbs at the base of Marty’s skull as the words start to blur together and he leans back in his seat, needing a little more space between him and the screen.
Unlike him, Emmett has leaned forward, elbows propped up on the table and his fingers laced tightly together as he takes in every word, unable and unwilling to stop now.
For once, Marty can’t quite get a read on what his friend is thinking based off his strangely serious expression and the occasional noncommittal noise he makes while his eyes dart across the screen. The Doc’s thinking about something��he always furrows his brows like that when he’s deep in thought, puzzling out some scientific conundrum—that he knows he’ll share with him once he’s had the chance to process the information.
He himself isn’t quite sure what to think. After all, he’s heard some of these terms thrown around by Doc in the course of their testing and refinement of the Flux Capacitor. It has to mean something that Joseph Cabret knows it too.
Emmett finally breaks his attention away from the screen to train his still-thoughtful gaze on Marty.
“What do you think, Doc? You think there’s any truth to what he’s been saying the last couple weeks or you think it’s all bullshit?”
The words I look forward to your reply, JC stare back at them from the bottom of the screen and Marty doesn’t know why he suddenly feels self-conscious.
“I think—we can’t entirely rule out the possibility.”
“You mean—seriously?”
“I’m not saying definitively yes or definitively no. A lot of the science he talks about is sound. I’ve come to many of the same conclusions in my own work, as you’ve seen in the tests with the Flux Capacitor. We know time travel is possible. However, that doesn’t necessarily mean everything he says is true. Without any proof positive or photos of his time machine, we’ll have to take everything else he says with a grain of salt.” A flicker of uncertainty passes across Emmett’s face, there and gone in the span of a blink.
He pushes the chair back as Marty asks, “And?”
Emmett blinks. “I’m sorry?”
“I didn’t read all of that,” Marty admits somewhat sheepishly. “I tuned out somewhere around black holes or wormholes and I figured you’d fill me in if there was anything important on the science end I needed to know. But I watched you read it and I saw that look on your face. There's something else bothering you about this.”
He doesn’t answer right away and Marty doesn’t rush to break the silence. Finally, he sighs, turning back to the screen. “No, you’re right. There is something that jumped out at me, but let’s wait and see what else he has to share with us before I start getting ahead of myself.”
“You’re going to answer him back?”
“Why not?” Marty beams, clearly pleased. “Let’s take a couple minutes to sit with this and then I’ll start working on our reply. If it all turns out to be for nothing in the end, at least we pursued the possibility rather than let it pass us by.”
#mcflyjuly#mcfly july 2024#back to the future#bttf#i didn't sleep last night so you've gotta take this unproofed mess for what it is fjal;skdfj#yes marty really made their handle that and doc hates it and i refused to let the opportunity pass me by#i've once again jumped well into au territory but this prompt absolutely called for it#now idk who is familiar with the appearance of john titor back in 2000-2001 but if you are you'll recognise exactly the inspiration behind#this prompt. i COULD NOT pass it up nor could i shut up apparently fjla;sdkfj#but if you're not familiar with him - john titor claimed to be a time traveller from the year 2036 who was on a mission to return to 1975#to acquire an ibm 5100 in order to take it back to the future in order to prevent global devastation#he showed up on forums talking a lot about the worldline he came from and his future and it became a whole big thing#it's super fascinating stuff actually - and john titor became somewhat of a legend#so in this au i play off that. you'll also notice the dates things are happening are shifted around#gonna just mess around with time travel rules here because i can#and then because this is bttf (and also steins;gate inspired too) our joseph cabret is far more than he seems...#this i also want to turn into a proper much less messy fic one day...
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mcfly july 2021 || day 5 Huey Lewis Concert
v.
Clara gave Marty a harmonica for Christmas in 1885. He was still lukewarm toward her, but his tepid smiles were the most he could manage after accepting he was stranded a century in his past.
Marty turned the harmonica in his hand, trying to be excited about it for her sake. What was he supposed to do with this? Have a Huey Lewis concert at the next festival?
“I’m told Hohner is a well-respected name.”
“It is.”
He poked his tongue into it, absorbing a tinny taste before testing.
Huey Lewis concert…
Marty’s smile warmed at the idea.
“Thanks, Clara.”
#mcfly july#mcflyjuly#back to the future#bttf#stuck in 1885 au#harmonicas#christmas#clara clayton#marty mcfly#clara's trying#100 words#drabble#bttf moodboard#bttf aesthetics#moodboard
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Review: Totally Killer (2023)
Totally Killer (2023)
Rated R for bloody violence, language, sexual material, and teen drug/alcohol use
<Originally posted at https://kevinsreviewcatalogue.blogspot.com/2023/10/review-totally-killer-2023.html>
Score: 3 out of 5
Totally Killer is a film where you can see the marks of Happy Death Day written all over it. That movie, which has grown in my estimation over the years, set a template for a kind of horror-comedy that Blumhouse has since come to specialize in, one that combines a slasher movie storyline with a big, high-concept hook straight out of a classic retro comedy (in Happy Death Day's case, it was Groundhog Day). In this case, director Nahnatchka Khan and writers David Matalon, Sasha Perl-Raver, and Jen D'Angelo not only put a slasher twist on the basic plot of Back to the Future and the Bill & Ted films, they went the extra mile and set large parts of the film in the '80s as well, having its modern-day protagonist confounded by the values of the decade as much as Marty McFly was by the '50s. The result is a film I enjoyed, but wanted to like more than I actually did given the wild ride that the trailers promised. On one hand, it nailed the comedy side of the equation and had a cool-looking killer, a great co-lead performance by Olivia Holt as an '80s mean girl, and a story that seemed to be going in some interesting directions, but on the other, the horror side was fairly rote, it held back on some of the ideas it leaned towards, and its leading lady Kiernan Shipka didn't do much to elevate the material. Ultimately, I'd sooner rewatch The Final Girls as a film that did a superficially similar story more effectively, but I can't deny that there's still a lot to like about this one, and I don't regret having watched it.
The film starts on Halloween in 2023, thirty-six years after Pam Hughes survived a killing spree where three of her friends were murdered by the "Sweet Sixteen Killer", a masked murderer who stabbed each of his victims sixteen times on their sixteenth birthdays in late October. Now, Pam is a soccer mom with a teenage daughter named (what else?) Jamie -- and tonight, she herself gets murdered by the Sweet Sixteen Killer, who was never caught and seems to have come back to finish the job. Jamie, distraught over her mother's death, suddenly receives two leads, first from a local true crime podcaster named Chris who tells her that Pam had received a note from the killer reading "you're next, one day" that she had kept secret, and second from her best friend Amelia, a science whiz who's trying to enter the science fair with a time machine that her mother Lauren designed but which she can't get to work. Thanks to some accidental intervention by the killer, Jamie somehow manages to figure out how to make the machine work, and gets sent back in time to 1987 on the day of the first murder. With a heads-up from the killer, she sets out to not only solve her mother's murder in the present, but also save her mother's friends in the past.
The comedy side of the film was clearly where Khan and the writers were most invested in the material. A lot of humor is mined from Jamie's reactions to not only how different the adults in her life were when they were her age, but also how the '80s were a very different time when it came to everything from politics to permissiveness, and not necessarily for the better, a rather appropriate perspective to take given how much of the film's plot concerns Jamie realizing just how much of a bitch her mother was back when she was her age. And on that note, Olivia Holt as young Pam was this film's heart and soul, not only looking like a perfect dead ringer for a young Julie Bowen (who plays her grown-up self) but understanding the assignment and feeling like nothing less than a more mean-spirited (if still heroic) version of the characters that her idol Molly Ringwald plays. Whenever Holt was on screen, which was fortunately often, this movie sparkled to life. The supporting cast, too, served as capable accomplices for Holt, whether it's their job to act frightened or make you laugh, and occasionally do both at the same time. (One kill in particular late in the film stands as one of the funniest "comedy" deaths I've ever seen.) The horror side of the film was a fairly boilerplate whodunit slasher that would be familiar to anyone who's seen Scream (a film that this one namedrops) or any of the films that followed in its wake. However, it was elevated by a killer whose look alone was creepy, wearing a Max Headroom-inspired mask that feels right at home in this movie's darkly comic sendup of the '80s and giving a twisted sort of edge to him. It may have just been aesthetics rather than substance, but those aesthetics were really damn cool, and given how much this movie is powered by a love of the visual and sonic landscape of '80s pop culture, it was exactly what the movie needed.
It was fortunate that this movie had Holt and its totally killer (sorry) style propelling it, because there were otherwise a lot of weak links here -- and unfortunately, they were some big ones. For starters, while I liked Kiernan Shipka on Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, I found myself very disappointed with her performance here, a problem given that she was supposed to be the main character. She acquitted herself well enough with the scares and as the "straight man" to the humor, but this film was built around Jamie's relationship with her mother, and while Holt carried her side of that story well enough, Shipka fell flat and couldn't get me interested in the character. What's more, the writing missed some very interesting and incisive directions that it could've gone in, tying Jamie's shock at her mother's awful behavior as a teenager to the jokes poking fun at the political incorrectness of the '80s and using both to craft a broader theme about how our memories of the past are all too often colored by selective nostalgia that glosses over the uncomfortable sides of the things we love. It's a dramatic throughline that was practically right there, waiting to be tapped, and yet the film barely even seems to think about how two of its primary elements might connect to one another. Finally, the reveal of the killer's identity was telegraphed almost from the moment we're introduced to one particular character, and the film did nothing to play around with it, resulting in a flat, uninteresting villain with a motive that's been done many times before and often better.
The Bottom Line
Totally Killer is goofy to a fault, seeming to actively avoid finding any deeper meaning in what it's saying in favor of delivering a sugar rush of '80s nostalgia. On that front, it delivered exactly what it set out to, a mix of retro aesthetics, lots of funny jokes, and a performance by Olivia Holt that ought to be a stepping stone to bigger and better things. If you wanna have some fun, check it out, though I do wish it got a bit meatier than it wound up being.
#totally killer#2023#2023 movies#horror#horror movies#comedy#comedy movies#horror comedy#olivia holt#kiernan shipka#slasher#slasher movies#time travel#julie bowen#liana liberato#lochlyn munro#randall park
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McFly July 5 - "lightning never strikes twice"
Thanks @randomlithuanian for partly inspiring this story!
Marty was sweating heavily as he pressed the gas pedal of the DeLorean deeper into the ground. Why didn’t this damn car go faster? It had just stalled for almost a minute, causing the boy a panic attack that could’ve easily been spared had he and Doc looked over the ignition earlier. But he was on his way now, that was all that mattered.
He gripped the steering wheel tighter, taking a deep breath as he approached the town square. Now or never. If he didn’t make it home now, he’d never get a chance ever again.
The speedometer hit 88, and lightning struck the clock tower.
Just a second before the vehicle would’ve reached the cable.
Marty’s eyes widened in shock, and he made an abrupt full braking. Or, he tried to. Next thing he knew he crashed into the theater with a loud noise. Pain spread in his body. Everything went black.
Marty awoke with a gasp. He immediately shot up, trying with all of his might not to scream.
He looked around, in an attempt to comprehend where he was. The boy was lying in a smaller bed in a relatively small room. The moonlight shone through the opened curtains in front of the window, eliminating the brightness the night sky possessed during summer nights like this one.
He was at the Brown’s house. It was the fifth of July, 1986. He was far away from well-timed lightning plots and automobile accidents. He was far away from 1955.
Yet, his mind had ultimately decided that reliving this memory and giving it an unfavorable twist in the midst of his peaceful sleep was a good idea. He shuddered, giving his best to calm himself down and go back to sleep.
Nightmares resembling this one have been, unfortunately, a common thing for Marty in the past months. He had dreamed about every kind of scenario already - him being erased from existence, Biff killing him, or worse, his father, Doc being shot to death by the Libyans or Buford Tannen and bleeding out as Marty kneeled next to him, sobbing uncontrollably. The dream about him getting stuck in the 50s was harmless compared to the ones available in the mind’s choice options. He hadn't told Doc, and he wasn't eager to do so. Emmett, in his few visits to Marty, hadn't been able to figure out that Marty often didn't get even a half night's sleep. And after the Browns had officially moved to the 20th century towards the end of April, the intensity of the nightmares had significantly decreased. There was no need to bother Doc.
Despite him waking up already ten minutes so ago, the teen was unable to decompress. In reality, the plan had worked. But this nightmare about remaining trapped in 1955 forever - with only Doc by his side to lead him through life - he had been reminded of something that had happened in the process of timing the acceleration with the lightning bolt. Doc - hadn't he been struck while holding the cable together?
Marty knew the scientist had survived the shock. After all, he was alive and well now, with a house and a family. And Marty also knew that Doc hadn't been seriously hurt. The teen would've noticed that while spending time with Emmett's 35-year-old self before departing to the old west. But what if it had been a minor injury that Doc had easily been able to hide? What if the lightning had caused long-term consequences?
Marty slapped himself on the forehead. Why was he pondering about the smallest things?
But then he crept out of bed and opened the door to the hallway, slowly descending the squeaky stairs. He went out the front door and ran barefoot across the lawn down to the family's garage, which Doc also was using as his laboratory.
The lights were on even though it was after midnight. Emmett Brown never had been and never will be the type to go to sleep early. Marty opened the door and cleared his throat.
Doc spun around. "Marty! What are you doing here at this hour, you should be sleeping!"
"Yeah, Doc, I could ask you the same thing. Shouldn't sleep keep oldies like you healthy and fit?"
"Now, young man, who are you calling old?", Doc said, outraged. But then he grinned, causing Marty to grin as well.
"Oops, sorry, I didn't mean it!", Marty shrugged jokingly.
Emmett grew serious again. "But, Marty, let's get back to the subject. It's-", he quickly checked one of his watches, "it's 1:04 am right now. What are you doing up and about?"
"I- well. I wanted to talk to you about something."
"Right now?"
"Yeah. Um, I maybe should've talked to you about this a long time ago, but-"
Marty looked at his older friend, who had raised his eyebrows in curiosity and concern.
"The lightning strike on November 12th…you weren't hurt when you connected the cable, were you?"
Emmett was taken aback by the question. "Why, no. I was wearing gloves, Marty. I knew what I was doing."
The teen sighed in relief. The sigh came out louder than he would've liked because Doc walked over to him and set a hand on his shoulder.
"But something tells me there's more to it than just random questions popping into teenagers' minds sometimes. Am I correct?"
Marty thought for a moment. He should tell Doc, shouldn't he? Not only would Doc never buy a lie, but the kid also desperately wanted the issue off his chest. "I, uh, keep having nightmares?"
"What do you mean, 'keep having'? How long has this been going on for?"
Marty looked at the floor, before muttering, "Eight months…"
Doc's eyes nearly bulged out of his head. "Eight months?! Great Scott, Marty! What on earth convinced you to keep this to yourself? You must be extremely exhausted!"
Marty waved a dismissive hand. "Nah, the dreams got better over the months. But sometimes, well…sometimes they're still pretty terrifying."
The inventor locked his eyes with Marty's as if searching for a hint of deep mental exhaustion or hidden sadness. "I can assure you that your family is alright, Marty. You are alright." He paused. "I am alright."
"I know, Doc. But I can't help it. Or, my brain doesn't. Today, it pretended I got stuck in the 50s because I missed the only predictable lightning bolt."
Doc knew no better than to gently pull Marty into a tight hug. "I promise both you and me are right when we belong, on July 5th, 1986." He rubbed Marty's back for a couple of seconds until he could feel Marty relaxing in his arms. Then he backed away. "And you promise me that the next time something like this comes up, you'll talk to me."
Marry nodded, reassured and in a much lighter mood. "Promise, Doc. Can I sleep on the couch here today?"
#back to the future#bttf#marty mcfly#doc brown#bttf fic#mcflyjuly#FLUFF ALERT EVERYBODY#i also wrote this at 11 pm so sorry if its nonsense i want to do every day of mcfly july#anyway i almost completely moved away from the prompt but i think?? it should be fine??#haha i adore them if u havent noticed yet#i love this challenge so much#why am i talking nonstop in the tags send help
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April 28, 2021
Back to the Future:
A hecking classic, a movie that shaped so many lives and perhaps shaped the future of movies. It was a big inspirations in many movies after it was released. It first viewed in 1985 and became extremely popular. Now at least once a year the movies will rescreen it ^-^.
Quotes:
“Jesus, Didn’t That Guy Ever Have Hair?”
“Silence, Earthling! My Name Is Darth Vader. I Am An Extraterrestrial From The Planet Vulcan!”
Plot summary:
In 1985, Marty McFly is a typical teenager living in Hill Valley, California. At home, Marty's cowardly father George is bullied by his supervisor, Biff Tannen. His mother Lorraine is an overweight, depressed alcoholic, and his older siblings are professional and social failures. An aspiring musician, Marty's band is rejected for a music contest. He confides in his girlfriend Jennifer Parker about fears of becoming like his parents, despite his ambitions.
That night, Marty meets his eccentric scientist friend Emmett "Doc" Brown in the Twin Pines mall parking lot. Doc unveils a time machine built from a modified DeLorean, powered by plutonium he swindled from Libyan terrorists. Doc inputs a destination time of November 5, 1955 – the day he first conceived his time travel invention. The terrorists arrive unexpectedly, opening fire and shooting Doc. Marty flees in the DeLorean, inadvertently activating time travel when he reaches 88 miles per hour (142 km/h).
Arriving in 1955, Marty discovers he has no plutonium to return. While exploring a burgeoning Hill Valley, Marty encounters his teenage father and discovers Biff has been bullying him since high school. George falls into the path of an oncoming car while spying on the teenage Lorraine, and Marty is knocked unconscious while saving him. He wakes to find himself tended to by Lorraine, who becomes infatuated with him. Marty tracks down a younger Doc and convinces him he is from the future. Doc explains the only source available in 1955 capable of generating the required 1.21 gigawatts of power for time travel is a lightning bolt. Marty shows Doc a flyer from the future that documents an upcoming lightning strike at the town's courthouse. Marty's siblings begin to fade from a photo he is carrying with him. He and Doc realize Marty's actions are altering the future and jeopardizing their chances to exist; Lorraine was supposed to meet George instead of Marty after the car accident. Early attempts to get his parents acquainted fail, and Lorraine's infatuation with Marty deepens.
Lorraine asks Marty to the school dance. He plots to feign inappropriate advances on Lorraine, allowing George to intervene and "rescue" her. The plan goes awry when Biff's gang interrupts and locks Marty in the trunk of the performing band's car, while Biff forces himself onto Lorraine. George arrives expecting to find Marty, and Biff bullies him into submission. After Biff hurts Lorraine, an enraged George knocks him unconscious. He escorts a grateful Lorraine to the dance. The band frees Marty from their car, but the lead guitarist is injured in the process. Marty takes his place and performs while George and Lorraine share their first kiss. With his future no longer in jeopardy, Marty heads to the courthouse to meet Doc.
Doc discovers a note from Marty warning him about his future and destroys it, worried about the consequences. To save Doc, Marty re-calibrates the DeLorean to return ten minutes before he left the future. The lightning strikes, sending Marty back to 1985, but the DeLorean breaks down, forcing Marty to run back to the mall. He arrives as Doc is being shot. While Marty grieves at his side, Doc sits up, revealing he pieced Marty's note back together and wore a bulletproof vest. He takes Marty home and departs to the future in the DeLorean.
Marty wakes the next morning to discover his father is now a successful, confident author, his mother is fit and happy, his siblings are successful, and Biff is a servile valet in George's employ. As Marty reunites with Jennifer, Doc suddenly reappears in the DeLorean, insisting they return with him to the future to save their children from terrible fates.[
Cast:
• Michael J. Fox as Marty McFly:
A high school student and aspiring musician
• Christopher Lloyd as Emmett "Doc" Brown:
An eccentric scientist experimenting with time travel[1]
• Lea Thompson as Lorraine Baines-McFly:
A 1955 teenager who grows into Marty's unhappy, alcoholic mother[2]
• Crispin Glover as George McFly:
A nerdy 1955 high schooler who grows into Marty's cowardly, submissive father[2]
• Thomas F. Wilson as Biff Tannen:
A 1955 high school bully turned George's 1985 boss[3]
James Tolkan portrays Hill Valley high school principal Strickland in both 1955 and 1985.[4] Back to the Future features a 1985-era cast that includes Claudia Wells as Marty's girlfriend Jennifer Parker, and Marc McClure and Wendie Jo Sperber as Marty's siblings Dave McFly and Linda McFly respectively.[4] Elsa Raven portrays the Clocktower Lady. Singer Huey Lewis cameos as a judge for the Battle of the Bands contest.[5][6] Richard L. Duran and Jeff O'Haco portray the Libyan terrorists.[7]
The 1955-era cast includes George DiCenzo and Frances Lee McCain as, respectively, Lorraine's parents Sam and Stella Baines,[4] and Jason Hervey as Lorraine's younger brother Milton. Biff's gang includes Jeffrey Jay Cohen as Skinhead, Casey Siemaszko as 3-D, and Billy Zane as Match. Norman Alden plays the cafe owner Lou and Donald Fullilove appears as his employee (and future mayor) Goldie Wilson. Harry Waters Jr. portrays Chuck Berry's cousin Marvin Berry, Will Hare appears as Pa Peabody, and Courtney Gains portrays Dixon, the youth who interrupts George's and Lorraine's dance.
(Wiki)
Directed byRobert ZemeckisProduced by
• Bob Gale
• Neil Canton
Written by
• Robert Zemeckis
• Bob Gale
Starring
• Michael J. Fox
• Christopher Lloyd
• Lea Thompson
• Crispin Glover
Music byAlan SilvestriCinematographyDean CundeyEdited by
• Arthur Schmidt
• Harry Keramidas
Production
companies
• Universal Pictures
• Amblin Entertainment
Distributed byUniversal Pictures
Release date
• July 3, 1985
Running time: 116 minutes
Country :United States
Language:English
Budget:$19 million
Box office:$388.8 million
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Chapter 6: September 17, 1985 Saturday Night at the Movies
Chapter Selection: [Chapter 1]–[Chapter 2]–[Chapter 3]–[Chapter 4]--[Chapter 5]--[Chapter 6]--[Chapter 7]--[Chapter 8]
He was so confused, blinking down at her, but he couldn’t help an excited breath escaping his lips as he looked at her. She looked beautiful. The lights on the marquee made her dark eyes glitter and surrounded her curls in a halo of gold. Her legs were bare and extended long past the short length of her skirt. He had placed his hands unconsciously on her upper arms when she approached him and the fabric was soft and fuzzy under his hands.
The soft smell of vanilla wafted from her curls with a hint of cherry proceeding from her reddened lips. He recalled that hot July day of her sucking on a bright red popsicle. The color had seeped into her lips and made her pout especially appealing to him. This gloss had the same effect and caught the glitter of the light above.
She gave him an eager, overwhelming, heart wrenching smile.
“What are you doing here?! Did the chief drop you off?” He finally found his voice after taking her in and pulled her a little closer. Suddenly the throng of eager middle schoolers around him felt crushing. She was out in the open and not just at school, but out for anyone to see. This was definitely a risk. His heart pounded and she placed a hand on his chest, trying to steady him.
“No, I…I biked here.”
“You what?!” Dustin, Will, and Lucas echoed together. Max had a hand over her eyes. El looked around worriedly at them. What if they took her back right away? She had to convince them. She had to lie. But she wasn’t any good at it and with Mike standing in front of her, she’d choke.
“El—er—Jane? Does the chief know you’re here?” Mike asked, fixing his gaze on her firmly. She steadied her gaze, willed herself to be convincing and nodded her head.
“Yes. He said we c-could try.” She was actually impressed with herself. She had held his gaze and only stumbled a little bit. Her hands felt warm in his and they were starting to sweat. She quickly put them in the pockets of her jean skirt and took a step back from him. “Is it okay? That I came?”
El glanced around at the others, they were stunned, waiting for Mike to speak. Mike, not totally convinced bit the inside corner of his mouth. She wouldn’t lie to him would she? But maybe she needed to. If the chief didn’t know she was here, she was going to be in a heap of trouble and surely she wouldn’t take such a big risk. She’d be grounded from now until eternity. She knew that. Right? All at once, Mike wasn’t so sure El knew what being grounded meant.
“Of course it’s okay that you came. But.. Jane, if Hopper doesn’t know you’re here, you’re going to be in a lot of trouble. You’re sure he said it was okay?” Mike asked worriedly. The last thing he wanted was for her to be taken from him. He’d gotten used to seeing her nearly every single day. The thought of her absence in his life again made him slightly crazy.
“I’m sure!” she nodded enthusiastically. He wouldn’t send her away now, she knew that. But El didn’t think he completely believed her. Whatever, she was here now, right?
“Okay. Hey Dustin, can you get Will’s ticket so I can get one for Jane?” El hadn’t thought about that. Money—it was still a new concept for her. She blushed for not remembering and mouthed a sorry at Mike as he clasped his hand over hers and pulled her into the line they were waiting in.
“Yeah, no problem man. This way, we all have dates.” Dustin slung his arm over Will’s short shoulders and pushed his face close to Will’s. “Isn’t that right schnookums?” Dustin made kissy noises in his ear prompting Will to laugh and swat at him.
“Finally found yourself a gay boyfriend eh Byers?!” Troy pushed past them, elbowing Will a little too hard.
“Isn’t the point of a boy having a boyfriend already implicitly gay?” Dustin asked logically.
Troy cocked his fist in mock aggression at Dustin and grimaced disgustedly at Will. “Queer.” He spat. Troy pushed his way toward the front of the line followed by two of his cronies who elbowed members of the party as they sauntered past. Mike pulled El farther behind him, blocking her mostly from view as Troy walked past. El peered around him watching Troy push his way to the front of the line and grab a ticket. El’s eyes narrowed angrily and she turned her gaze back to Will who was looking dejectedly at his feet.
“Come on, dude, this movie is going to be awesome!” Dustin shook his shoulders and they moved forward with the line.
Once inside El looked around excitedly. Mike led her to the concession counter and ordered a popcorn for them to share and a soda. She held the bucket of bright yellow popcorn delightedly in her fingers while Mike took a sip of the soda and nodded toward the ticket checker. The party followed suit with their snacks.
They settled into the darkened theater watching the previews begin. El couldn’t believe she was here. The giant screen before her was brilliant with color as she shoved handfuls of popcorn into her mouth. She heard a soft giggle beside her and tore her gaze away from the screen for a moment to look at Mike. He smiled at her and reached for her free hand. He leaned forward and kissed her softly, unexpectedly. He lingered there just above her lips for a minute before sitting back into his seat. The movie brightened into vivid color after the kiss sent her brain into fits of happiness.
She watched as Doc Brown and Marty McFly pushed the boundaries of the time and space in their Delorian and she felt more real than she had at any point since being released into Hawkins. No one was staring at her, no one was looking for her. Mike was beside her and her friends laughed along with the movie. She felt real and whole for the first time. She thought she might burst.
Once the credits rolled, El felt a slightly sinking feeling in her stomach. She knew now that the time was fastly approaching when she would have to confront the chief. A small part of her hoped so desperately that he had been held up at the station and hadn’t made it home yet. Maybe she’d even make it back before him. The wish held little truth, she knew, but still a girl could dream. She threaded her arm through Mike’s and leaned her body into him tightly. Mike could feel the worry and anxiety washing off of her in waves.
She had lied. He knew that now for sure. She wasn’t supposed to be out, yet here she was. He sighed sadly and leaned his head down to kiss the top of her curly head, giving her hand a light squeeze. The party was laughing and skipping into the lobby of the theater, reciting their favorite lines.
“I think I should bike home with you.” Mike suggested. El shook her head firmly. There was no way that was going to happen. El knew what awaited her at home. Mike didn’t need to see the extent of her decision.
“No. No Mike I can make it home. Really.” She paused just outside of the theater doors. The marquee lights felt so much dimmer now. Mike screwed up his face in a worried grimace and shook his head, his soft curls bouncing against his temples.
“No. I’m going with you. You can’t stop me.” Well, she could, but she wasn’t going to try. She surrendered and after feigning cheerful goodbyes to the rest of the party, she mounted her bike, Mike straddling his, and they took off down the main road.
After a short while of peddling in silence and once they broke out of the main part of Hawkins, the trees rising up around them and the road deserted, Mike turned his face toward her.
“El, how much trouble do you think you’re in?” She didn’t answer right away. She stood confidently on her bike and pushed one foot hard down on the pedal pulling just ahead of Mike and coasting down the last hill toward the double wide.
“I had to try, he was never going to let me leave. Not really.” She whispered to no one but herself.
They quietly pulled up to the double wide. The kitchen light was on, Hopper’s cruiser in the driveway. It was quiet. For a heartbeat, she thought she might be okay, but then she caught sight of Hopper through the window. A cigarette was clenched in his mouth and he stamped it out and hurried to the door when he saw her. She dismounted her bike and let it fall beside her. She wasn’t even going to bother hiding it, he already knew. The front door flew open and an angry Hopper stomped across the porch and down the stairs coming to a halt a few feet in front of her. His eyes shot to an alarmed Mike.
“Get lost Wheeler. You better say a goodbye now because you’re not going to see her for awhile.” Hopper’s tone was an even growl. “Do I make myself clear?” he said through gritted teeth at Mike.
“It’s not his fault.” El managed. Hopper shot his gaze back at her taking a step forward.
“Did I ask who’s fault this is?! No! You knew the rules, he knew the rules, and you both disregarded them. So as much as I don’t care, and I really, really don’t care, what either of you have to say about it, you’re done.”
“I know I should have brought her back Chief, I’m sorry, I just—,” Mike launched into a hurried apology, his bike discarded next to him.
“Just nothing, Wheeler. I said get lost! You both put each other at risk! And for WHAT?! A bike ride?!”
“Movie.” El breathed, her eyes turned down now.
“What?!”
“We went to see a movie. Nobody even looked at me.” El’s eyes were determined now and she looked up at an aghast Hopper.
“I don’t CARE! YOU KNEW THE RULES KID. YOU KNEW THEM AND YOU DECIDED TO LIE TO ME, SNEAK OUT, AND GO TO A MOVIE WITH MIKE. THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE!” Hopper’s voice boomed out across the open space in front of the double wide, alighting birds from the trees.
“Get inside, right now,” the last word was barely audible, he was shaking he was so mad.
“Nobody saw me.” El shot back, more adamant this time. Her eyes glimmered with anger too. She had to make him understand. “Nothing happened. And no one saw me. The rules don’t make sense if there is no risk and tonight showed there’s no risk.”
“Watch it kid…” Hopper pointed a finger at her taking a step toward her. “You’re in enough trouble. You’re grounded for two weeks. And we’re going to have to decide if you can still handle school or not, because obviously you can’t be trusted to follow basic rules, who knows what you’re capable of unsupervised at the school. You might just take off again. Now get in the house before it’s three weeks.”
“Wait! You can’t just yank her out of school for sneaking out, that’s crazy!” Mike was next to El now, nearly standing in front of her, panic pulled across his face.
“You’re going to take me out of school?!” El hadn’t considered this. Her tone pitched from devastation to anger. Her fingers pulled into tiny fists and she glared at Hopper, the windows rattling with her rising anger.
“Wheeler I’m not gonna tell you again,” Hopper’s gaze was trained on Mike standing in front of him. He hadn’t bargained for two teenage arguments tonight. They were at a standoff. Mike wouldn’t budge, his face turned up toward Hopper’s in a fitful scowl. The kid was getting close to eye level with him in his ever towering height.
“El,” Hopper steadied his tone through gritted teeth, “Get inside. Now.”
The rattling grew louder and the chief glanced around worriedly at the rising noise, but when his gaze returned to hers, it was clear, firm. A spot of blood ran from El’s nose and she shut her eyes tightly. The tremoring windows quieted and she pushed past Mike with a broken sob, clattering up the front porch steps and slamming the screen door behind her. They both watched her go.
“You can’t,” Mike breathed, devastation coloring his tone. He was nearly begging. Hopper gave him one last exhausted look and then followed El up into the house, leaving Mike on the lawn, his chest rising and falling in growing panic, tears pricking at the corner of his eyes.
#stranger things#stranger things fanfiction#stranger things fandom#stranger things 2#stranger things fic#mike wheeler#eleven#dustin henderson#will byers#lucas sinclair#my fic#Chapter 6
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30 question tag
I was tagged by @holdinghim , @94rapline and @kpoplesbian (thanks guys!!!)
rules: answer 30 questions and then tag 20 blogs you would like to know better
1. Nickname: lule is technically a nickname
2. Gender: sometimes. sometimes not.
3. Star sign: cancer sun and moon
4. Height: 162 cm (and a half!!!) (like 5′3 i guess)
5. Time: 1:05 am
6. Birthday: july 22nd
7. Favourite band(s): green day, bts, day6, f(x), the ramones, mcfly, against me!, clipping., years & years, kard, the internet
8. Favourite solo artist(s): angel haze, troye sivan, m.i.a, ladyhawk, iamx, amber, frank ocean, hayley kiyoko
9. Song stuck in my head: i loved you by day6
10. Last movie I watched: léon the professional
11. Last show I watched: the property brothers lmao
12. When did I create my blog: in 2012 asdfghj dont even look at me
13. What do i post: kpop and sometimes aesthetics and posts about how gay i am
14. Last thing I googled: dolars to argentine pesos asdfghjkljh
15. Do you have other blogs: i have an aesthetics/kinda nsfw blog lmao but i dont post there a lot
16. Do you get asks: sometimes
17. Why did you choose your URL: a mutual gave it to me bc i love namjoon and also i love namjoon
18: Following: 795
19. Followers: 2570
20. Favourite colour: purple and black and recently i like yellow a lot
21. Average hours of sleep: 7?
22. Lucky number: 2
23. Instruments: i tried to play guitar when i was like 10 and then again at 14 but i failed miserably both times but i still love guitars and stare fondly at them whenever i see them...............but i dont play any instruments lmao
24. What am I wearing: ripped jeans and black hoodie and red converse
25. How many blankets do I sleep with: like 3 or 4
26. Dream job: uh............next question
27. Dream trip: i really wanna travel anywhere and everywhere
28. Favourite food: rice. and watermelon
29. Nationality: argentinian
30. Favourite song now: its a tie between serendipity by bts and i loved you by day6
im tagging @4hobii @5namjoon @lesnamjoon @lesbianblossomjimin @trendylesbian @xxicenturygrl @hobikenobi @geniusnamjoon @jurassicbird @softboy-yoongi but yall dont have to do it ofc!!
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Marty the grocery store robot is a glimpse into our hell-ish future
Attention shoppers: I've seen the future of grocery store technology, and let me tell you, we can do better.
I’m no Marty McFly. I simply reside in a small Connecticut town, which means that in addition to doing Extremely New England things like commuting to the city on the Metro North, bragging about beaches, and the fact that the state inspired the picturesque fictional town in Gilmore Girls, I occasionally spend some time on the weekends shopping for groceries at a local Stop & Shop.
Prior to 2019, the Stop & Shop shopping experience was similar to that offered by most any other large grocery store chain. But this year, Stop & Shop introduced giant, gray, aisle-patrolling robots at more than 200 stores in Connecticut, Massachusetts, Rhode Island, and New Jersey.
Now, food shopping comes with unprecedented levels of anxiety and absurdity.
Sneaking a peek while Marty is safely docked.
Image: nicole gallucci / mashable
Each of the robots weighs a massive 140-pounds and costs a whopping $35,000. Oddly, all of the robots are named Marty, and atop their tall frames — which tower over my own 5 foot, 3 inch stature — rests a large pair of google eyes. You know, so as not to come off as complete faceless, emotionless, lifeless bots. If you’re confused as to what these rolling mechanical columns do, Martys also wear the following description on their bodies like a name tag:
This store is monitored by Marty for your safety. Marty is an autonomous robot that uses image capturing technology to report spills, debris, and other potential hazards to store employees to improve your shopping experience.
Essentially, once Marty identifies a hazard using its sensors, it stops in its tracks, changes its signature operating lights from blue to yellow, and repeatedly announces, "Caution, hazard detected," in English and Spanish. One of several catches to their existence, however, is that the robots don't actually clean anything.
Marty does a whole lot of nothing
Marty is advertised as an aisle-sweeping superhero, but it's simply a messenger that shouts about a problem until a more capable human comes and removes whatever the hazard may be. Upon learning this fact, some people, like myself and the woman heard in this video shared by Twitter user @jennlynnjordan, are rightfully confused.
Apparently my supermarket has just gotten a robot. Its name is Marty. It detects spills. Doesn’t clean them, just starts shouting if it sees one. pic.twitter.com/xnRuV8LBCU
— Jennifer Jordan (@jennlynnjordan) July 23, 2019
"Oh, I thought it washed the floor," the unimpressed mystery shopper can be heard saying. "Wow... I've got my husband to tell me there's a mess!” she continued, delivering a burn to both Marty and her semi-helpful hubby. As Jessica McKenzie reports for the New Food Economy , employees aren't the biggest fans of the machines either.
“It’s really not doing much of anything besides getting in the way,” an employee told McKenzie. And in some cases, the machines even create more work.
A January press release states that the in-store robots are supposed to "enable associates to spend more time serving and interfacing with customers," but one of the robot’s major flaws that its sensors appear to treat each hazard with the same level of caution. A harmless bottle cap or errant piece of cilantro will elicit the same response as a spill of clear liquid that someone could genuinely slip and injure themselves on, which means that in certain cases an employee may have to take time that could be spent interacting with a customer to walk across the store and grab a puny little grape that escaped a bag. Seems counterproductive!
The other day, we heard the googly eyed and friendly stop& shop robot alerting (in two different languages) of a found hazard! We braved it out to find out what this hazard was: a bottle cap! #robotLifeProblems pic.twitter.com/h965nscTy7
A post shared by Robert Schaufelberger (@dekorobert) on Jul 24, 2019 at 12:50pm PDT
I've only seen Marty "go off" once in the produce section. When an employee came to the rescue she couldn't seem to find the hazard, so in attempt to quiet the robot she scanned the floor and began picking up any fragment in sight — a questionable crumb, a plastic bread tag, a shred of corn husk. To this day I have no idea what minuscule object Marty was trying to warn me about, but after causing quite the scene it eventually resumed floor duty.
The feeling of shopping amidst a supermarket stalker
When Marty isn't getting all hot and bothered about an abandoned twist tie on the floor, you can find the robot beeping incessantly and lurking behind customers' backs.
Some shoppers — especially those with children — find the robots charming. Nancy Lesslie, who frequents a Stop & Shop in Quincy, Massachusetts, told the Boston Globe, "I talk to him [Marty] I take videos of him. I show them to my kids... he just makes me smile."
Others, however, find Marty's unfamiliar presence a bit unsettling.
Met Marty the robot in my local Stop & Shop last night. He followed me around the store. Still not sure how to feel about it. 🤔 #retail pic.twitter.com/a6C7GnNADn
@BenKissel @LPontheleft I finally met Marty today and he scared me as I turned the corner. He just roams around and makes ominous beeps constantly. Robots taking over at my local Stop and Shop in MA. pic.twitter.com/67xC3tbQYz
— Jennifer Jordan (@jennlynnjordan) July 23, 2019
Bucks County, PA on some next-level sci-fi shit pic.twitter.com/QAzdVsDZAl
— Krieger (@KriegerStyle) July 15, 2019
On one shopping trip while I was browsing a shelf filled with bags of quinoa, I realized that the possibility of Marty choosing my aisle to turn down filled me with genuine anxiety. As Marty's beeps grew louder and closer I literally held my breath and prepared to speed-walk away if necessary to avoid an encounter. After seeing Marty roll past my aisle I triumphantly thought, "That's right. Keep rolling."
Remember that one debate in October 2016 when Trump was shadowing Hillary Clinton like a magnetic ghost? That's how I feel whenever Marty is around. The googly eyes soften the machine's appearance for a few seconds, but once you break off the staring contest you're reminded that you're in the presence of a rolling piece of tech that uses laser sensing and cameras.
Marty Mc... Why?
Ultimately, these robots feel more like a burden than a benefit. They're way too large, way too beep-y, way too pricey, and they seem to create additional tedious work for employees.
You're telling me Marty has to be this huge? We're the same humans that created the Roomba, and yeah, it sometimes runs over dog poop and makes a mess, but at least it's small and capable of cleaning.
And is it really worth investing $35,000 in a mostly useless machine when Stop & Shop has reportedly cut back on staffing and made money problems clear to employees?
The robots did have one perk, though. They actually increased human interaction and led me to interact with employees and fellow shoppers more than usual. Nothing more unifying than a couple of humans chatting over shared robot confusion. As time passes and we further acquaint ourselves with Marty's presence, though, that conversation will die down.
Met this robot in Stop and Shop today Are the eyes to make it more relatable? Distract us from the robot takeover? Comic relief?? Ironically increased human interaction in the store because everyone is talking about it pic.twitter.com/eJ6oAWQCgK
— Alexa Sterling (@AquaticSterling) January 27, 2019
While Stop & Shop's tech innovations have made headlines recently, they aren't the only stores to test out robots. Westfield malls in California introduced Pepper, a cute 4-foot-tall humanoid robot, in 2016, and even Walmart plans to bring thousands of autonomous floor scrubbers to stores next year.
In June, Stop & Shop began bringing Marty to stores in New York, and by the end of the year, 500 of the robots will be in Stop & Shop stores and Giant food stores — another supermarket chain owned by the Netherlands-based parent company, Ahold Delhaize.
Perhaps if I wasn't so paranoid of technology and didn't live through billions of email addresses getting hacked, millions of Facebook users being impacted by security breaches, rumors that Amazon Echo devices are spying on us, and more I would be more accepting of Marty. But for now, I just want to shop for groceries in peace.
This content was originally published here.
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69 times James Blunt was laugh-out-loud funny on Twitter
LONDON — The title of "funniest British person on Twitter" is a hotly contested one.
Obviously Danny Dyer has a very strong Twitter game, and rarely a day goes by when J.K. Rowling doesn't tweet something brilliant.
SEE ALSO: 21 of the most hilarious and disturbing Ricky Gervais selfies of all time
But there's another contender who could give both of them a run for their money.
With his unique mix of brutal self-deprecation, even more brutal comebacks, and gloriously filthy ripostes, James Blunt has a Twitter game that contrasts spectacularly with his gentle song lyrics.
We've rounded up some of his best efforts below.
1. This straight-to-the-point album announcement.
If you thought 2016 was bad - I'm releasing an album in 2017.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) December 13, 2016
2. The time he shared an important warning.
*WARNING* if you see an email saying, "2 free tickets to James Blunt", DO NOT open it. It contains 2 free tickets to James Blunt.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) August 27, 2011
3. This memorable comeback.
Damn thing's always getting caught under my feet. RT @laurenlyall: Why does James Blunt sing like his willy is being stood on?
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) October 16, 2013
4. This weather update.
This is the sort of snow that makes me strip off and start singing...
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) January 14, 2013
5. The time he saw the perfect opportunity to plug his new music.
NO NEED. I HAVE A NEW ALBUM COMING SOON. @katy_nicolson: Can we all take a moment and remember just how terrible James Blunt was
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) February 18, 2013
6. This unfortunate anecdote.
I just overheard someone say to their friend, "Look there's a smaller version of James Blunt!"
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) April 29, 2013
7. This spectacularly empathetic response.
Me too. And even worse, I realised I was! @shigham77 @Lloydy_78 I'm having a bad weekend, some guy just asked me if I was James Blunt!?
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) June 2, 2013
8. The time he told a harsh truth.
I swear on my life, I don't. RT @Espinalx3: No worries at least James Blunt thinks you are beautiful.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) June 11, 2013
9. The time he offered some words of comfort.
As long as she didn't say you sing like me, you're fine RT @NathWimlett: the lady in the post office told me i look like James Blunt #hmmmm
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) June 10, 2013
10. The time he made an important correction.
Even less than that! The song was only 3 minutes and 30 seconds long. RT @_dearjocelyn: James Blunt had his 15 min of fame and disappeared
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) June 15, 2013
11. And another.
2006, actually. RT @K_Dick33: Why does James Blunt have a million followers? He stopped being relevant in 2009
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) January 30, 2015
12. The time he finished someone's sentence in the dirtiest way possible.
Stays in James Blunt. RT @iAreAbby: Whatever happens to James Blunt.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) June 25, 2013
13. The time he shared this person's dismay.
Agreed. Worse than catching him playing with himself. RT @SmokeySunflower: Caught my brother listening to James Blunt. Wow.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) June 25, 2013
14. The time he spotted a flaw in this fan's request.
Sorry, but my last name is not spelt 'mcfly' RT @jamesmcflyfan: James, I am your biggest fan. Please follow me. Please.it would make my day
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) August 13, 2013
15. This smooth response.
I'm sorry, but you'll have to get to the back of the queue. RT @Alif_novaldi: Fuck you james blunt
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) October 8, 2013
16. This simple explanation.
My mum's in the audience. RT @AtaraMcBooth: Who the fuck is cheering for fucking James Blunt.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) October 11, 2013
17. The time he embraced his critics.
Thanks! Whole album out next Mon! RT @DeirdreHipwell: Have managed to avoid James blunt's new song until now. Bonfire Heart is truly awful.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) October 15, 2013
18. The time he made someone's day that little bit worse.
Yes. He could start tweeting you. RT @MigsterMMA: Jesus christ, James Blunt's got a new album out. Is there anything else that can go wrong?
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) October 20, 2013
19. This biblical retort.
Jesus only needed twelve. RT @garymoody65: @JamesBlunt why you only got 200k followers?
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) October 29, 2013
20. And this one.
Your god can't hear you. He's listening to track 3. RT @HollieShand: Oh god...who let James Blunt release another album?!
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) December 10, 2013
21. OK, one more.
I did, but you'll NEVER guess what happened on the third day!? RT @gravedads: I thought James Blunt died
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) December 14, 2013
22. The time he spotted a typo.
Easy spelling mistake as K and L are right beside each other. RT @lizziea1: I want to kick James Blunt... repeatedly... I dont know why
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) October 24, 2013
23. The time he totally shut down this hater.
I never liked the sound of my own voice. Till it made me rich. @SamanthaMika: Does anyone else HATE james blunt's voice? I can't stand it.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) November 1, 2013
24. This cheerful play on words.
Most of them are single. RT @xox_Shell_xox: Is there one single James Blunt fan out there?
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) December 8, 2013
25. And this one.
Viagra and coffee mostly. RT @paigefergg: Bloody hell why is James Blunt still going
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) December 12, 2013
26. The time he refused to admit he's a James Blunt fan.
Nope, you're on your own. RT @chickenoriental: I must be 1 of only 2 who genuinely likes every @jamesblunt song. The other person being him.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) December 12, 2013
27. The time he brought your mum into things.
Boning your mum. RT @Charlie_1232: James Blunt has a twitter, what would he even tweet about?
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) December 3, 2014
28. And your grandma.
Only coz I turned her down. RT @anadinskywalker: my grandma just called james blunt a queer
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) December 15, 2013
29. Your "missus", too.
As does your missus. RT @teamtommo58: James blunt your music sucks #fact
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) December 31, 2013
30. Oh, and your mum again.
Because I won't pay the child support? RT @Buizel0418: My mom hates James Blunt. xD
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) June 10, 2014
31. The time he made a confession.
Only I was drunk at the time. RT @tianpogiaf: People who think you're beautiful - 1. Your parents 2. James Blunt
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) December 16, 2013
32. The time he refused to let rhyming slang get him down.
I foresee a career in poetry. @McKym: James blunt is a cunt
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) December 31, 2013
33. This absolute mic drop.
And no mortgage. RT @hettjones: James Blunt just has an annoying face and a highly irritating voice
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) December 24, 2013
34. And this one.
Prince Harry. By text. BOOM! RT @dinolauz: Who the fuck invited James Blunt to the Invictus Games?
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) May 10, 2016
35. This response to an international critic.
Correct. I am indeed hung like a pony. @jazz_mazz: James Blunt is ja auch eher so ein one trick pony oder?
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) January 4, 2014
36. The time he didn't even need words.
RT @JordanSHill: What ever happened to James Blunt? pic.twitter.com/ahCI6N9ZRn
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) January 16, 2014
37. This canine-themed burn.
Then your dog should try harder. RT @RachelJohnsto96: @JamesBlunt my dog could do better!!!!!
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) January 10, 2014
38. This "2 Girls, 1 Cup"-themed burn.
I preferred "2 girls, 1 cup", but whatever you're into. RT @joe__crown: 2 bullets, one gun, James Blunt and Noel Edmunds.. Without doubt
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) December 16, 2013
39. This gloriously filthy comeback.
Sorry. Wrong hole. RT @Sam_SamV: James Blunt makes my ears bleed
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) January 20, 2014
40. And this one.
And finishes in your mouth. RT @trimjim90: James Blunt gets on my tits.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) February 21, 2014
41. This one, too.
At least it’s not on your face. RT @MiissAshley: Nothing fucks your vibe up more than James Blunt coming on your Young Money Pandora 🔫
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) September 16, 2014
42. Alright, one more.
And my balls on your chin. RT @thejrodman: Now I have James Blunt stuck in my head...
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) July 6, 2014
43. The time he made an important announcement.
Proud to announce that I will be headlining at ShitFest this year.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) February 7, 2014
44. Not to mention this equally important update.
Am making a solo sex tape. Will leak it online shortly.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) March 8, 2014
45. The time he shared his version of food porn.
#foodporn pic.twitter.com/CPkwU4BfqN
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) April 26, 2014
46. The time he refused to give Ed Sheeran special treatment.
@JamesBlunt marry me?
— Ed Sheeran (@edsheeran) February 7, 2014
These kind of requests need to go through management, please. RT @edsheeran: @JamesBlunt marry me?
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) February 7, 2014
47. The time he compared himself to Justin Bieber.
Can't believe Justin Bieber's balls dropped before mine.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) March 17, 2014
48. The time he gave some medical advice.
Then you need to see a doctor. @Lewisscoot: @JamesBlunt looks like my left testicle
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) April 30, 2014
49. The time he shared his "guilty pleasure".
Mine is anal. RT @OliviaMae_98: James Blunt is my guilty pleasure 😍
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) August 8, 2014
50. His explanation for the lack of tour dates in Scotland.
The Scots have taste. RT @heatherhjordisX: Why is james blunt not touring in scotland??????
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) July 30, 2014
51. This abrupt update.
Struggling to finish off with my left hand.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) July 26, 2014
52. His suggestion for a band name.
If I was in a band, it would be called, "Limp Willy And The Disappointments"
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) August 9, 2014
53. This timeless reply.
It's only halfway in. RT @Thomasemaan: Just realized how short James Blunt is !!!
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) December 19, 2014
54. And this one.
Unless I find your bum. RT @zomboy666: I've got fucking James Blunt in my head. I suppose at least that means my day can't get any worse.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) January 16, 2015
55. This name-changing anecdote.
My real name is James Blount, but I changed it as people teased me that it rhymed with 'count'.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) November 19, 2014
56. The time he made an important distinction.
I was talking to the driver. RT @Chelsea_Goulden: Just got in a taxi and You're Beautiful by James Blunt is playing. Why thank you kind sir😂
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) November 23, 2014
57. This harsh wakeup call.
Not even I think you’re beautiful.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) January 3, 2015
58. The time he showed off his hilarious powers of self-deprecation.
Yup, it's called "Greatest Hit". RT @Farrsigh: There's a "best of" James Blunt? Really?
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) January 8, 2015
59. Actually, he's done this on quite a few occasions.
Sorry haven’t Tweeted in a while. I Blocked myself by mistake.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) January 17, 2016
60. Lots of occasions.
For Lent, I've given up music. There is a god.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) February 20, 2015
61. This might be our favourite one.
On this week, 10 years ago, your music taste sucked ass. pic.twitter.com/eQ6clu6F2h
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) July 23, 2015
62. The time he expected the worst.
I'm guessing this is not good. RT @supermarton: James Blunt es lo peor que le ha pasado a la humanidad desde Hitler
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) January 23, 2015
63. The time he chipped in with his thoughts on Eurovision.
You know we’d win the Eurovision Song Contest if you just had the balls to enter me.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) March 9, 2015
64. This name change.
ANNOUNCEMENT: In keeping with other greats such as Prince, J Lo and Diddy, I announce that henceforth, I am to be known only as J Blo.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) April 1, 2015
65. This no-nonsense burn.
Yeah, I bought those 20 million albums myself. RT @TroyJosephDavis: no one really likes James Blunt right?
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) April 17, 2015
66. The time he celebrated his Spotify income.
I get paid £00.0004499368 per stream. Beers are on me! Cheers @Spotify.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) October 17, 2015
67. This smutty riposte.
Depends where I put it. RT @paulinaboncan: Little bit of james blunt never hurt anybody
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) June 3, 2016
68. This one, too.
Then sit on something else. RT @PhoebeChristaki: James Blunt's face fully aggravates me
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) June 21, 2016
69. And finally, what may be the greatest tweet of all time.
I’d fuck me.
— James Blunt (@JamesBlunt) June 1, 2015
James Blunt may have a new album coming out this year, but we really, really hope he still finds the time to tweet.
BONUS: Ramsay Bolton is basically the secret Ed Sheeran of 'GoT'
#_author:Sam Haysom#_lmsid:a0Vd000000DTrEpEAL#_uuid:6849392f-68f7-33e6-9ed4-86d2549e5c8d#_revsp:news.mashable
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5 Recent Movies (You Never Realized Were Completely Insane)
Nobody expects every movie to be great. For every Steven Spielberg, there’s a Tommy Wiseau. For every Ridley Scott, there’s, uh, well, another Ridley Scott. No self-respecting person has the time or inclination to watch everything Hollywood craps out, so it’s quite possible that you don’t know how bad some recent movies turned out to be. Luckily for you, we have no self-respect, so let us satiate your morbid curiosity by telling you all about this year’s most baffling cinematic turds (so far). SPOILERS AHEAD!
5
Folks, Tom Cruise Was The Real Mummy ALL ALONG
Tom Cruise played Jerry Maguire in Jerry Maguire, Jack Reacher in Jack Reacher, and someone who was born on the 4th of July in Born On The Fourth Of July. Guess who he plays in The Mummy. Go on, guess.
At first, Cruise’s character is your average U.S. Army sergeant in Iraq who seduces archaeologists to steal their maps and search for treasure. Early on, he gets into a fight with some alleged insurgents he happened to run into and orders a goddamn air strike on them — the military equivalent of asking your brother to finish the level for you.
Universal Pictures Instead of bombs, they dropped copies of the script.
Fortunately, we don’t have much time to mull over the ethical implications of all this, because the strike accidentally uncovers an ancient tomb:
Universal Pictures And like all ancient tombs in movies, it’s shaped like Clint Eastwood’s scowling face.
Cruise, the guy from New Girl, and the woman whose map he stole with his penis are sent in to investigate. They discover an ancient mummy, but more importantly, the archaeologist lets us know that Cruise sucks in bed (and not in the good sense). As they’re flying the Mummy back to England, after long stretches of dialogue about sexual inadequacy, the plane crashes and Tom Cruise fucking dies.
Unfortunately, the movie doesn’t end there — Cruise soon wakes up in a body bag, either because of the Mummy’s magic or some kind of weird loophole in Dianetics.
Universal Pictures If you told us Tom Cruise sleeps inside a plastic bag at home every day, we’d fully believe it.
A moment later, Cruise’s friend and two doctors walk in, and everyone’s biggest concern is that they can see the dick of this guy who just cheated death itself. Anyway, the Mummy ends up getting captured midway through the movie, a plot development that probably feels familiar to anyone who wasn’t in a coma between 2008 and now:
At one point we also meet Russell Crowe, who plays Dr. Jekyll. As in the Dr. Jekyll, the one who turns into the villainous Mr. Hyde. Presumably Hyde is the one who smacks hotel clerks with phones and insists on singing in public.
The third act then finds an army of corpses rising and attacking the city — though taking into consideration how Tom Cruise is in his 50s but has jet-black hair, works out like crazy, and spends most of this movie talking about how he boned someone more than 20 years younger than him, the sight of him fleeing a sea of rotting bodies ravaged by time accidentally becomes a powerful metaphor.
Then in the very end, Tom Cruise basically lets the Mummy win and use him as the host body for the god of death — but then he uses his new powers to kill her. So yes, Cruise now has ancient mummy powers, and will possibly develop an affinity for wearing toilet paper all over his body in the next movie he shows up in.
4
Did You Know Harriet Tubman Knew The Transformers?
It’s no secret that the Transformers series is basically the cinematic equivalent of watching a Monster Energy Drink in a paint shaker. Hell, the last movie found Mark Wahlberg guzzling a flaming bottle of Bud Light like that’s a normal thing to do. Even with the bar so low (and presumably on fire), Transformers: The Last Knight is maddeningly awful.
For starters, the story is an obvious attempt to smoosh together a bunch of popular TV shows into a Transformers movie. It opens with a dragon Transformer helping King Arthur, who’s seemingly engaged in some kind of game, for some kind of throne …
After a jarring time jump, we meet a scrappy gang of kids seemingly played by the Stranger Things kids’ stunt doubles:
What was that other big TV show from last year? Oh yeah, Westworld. Cue Anthony Hopkins delivering a bunch of nonsensical exposition about robots, which is apparently his jam now.
Here’s where the wheels really come off before they can retract and turn into a dinosaur. Hopkins explains that he is the only remaining member of a secret society that protects the secret history of the Transformers on Earth. It turns out that these giant-ass talking vehicles were present for many famous historical milestones. We just … forgot about them? Didn’t notice?
Members of the Society of Transformer Pals included Einstein, da Vinci, Shakespeare, and Stephen Hawking (who, by the way, is still alive, movie). Also a member? Harriet Tubman. That’s right, this movie is implying that Transformers helped the Underground Railroad. Which people have pointed out is a) insane, and b) you’d think giant weaponized robots could have done a touch more to help the slaves. At least the movie doesn’t raise the question of why the Transformers didn’t stop the Holocaust or some-
3
There Was A Movie About The Guy From Avatar Hanging Out With God In A Shack
Sam Worthington stars in The Shack, a movie adaptation of the best-selling Christian inspirational novel. The movie starts in the past, where we see our main character, Mack, and his mother being abused by his alcoholic dad. So naturally, Mack pours strychnine in his dad’s booze, probably murdering him, though it’s hard to say because this is never mentioned again.
Flash-forward to Mack all grown up and Sam-Worthington-like. But his life is still beset by tragedy, as his youngest daughter is kidnapped and murdered by a serial killer (!!!) during a camping trip. They never find her body, but Mack is told she was killed in a remote shack (a place the B52s would never in their right minds sing about). That winter, a distraught Mack receives a mysterious note inviting him to the shack, signed “Papa” — which is his wife’s nickname for God, not an implication that Ernest Hemingway is penning creepy notes from beyond the grave.
Thinking this might be his daughter’s killer, a gun-toting Mack accepts the invitation and heads up to the abandoned cabin, which sadly contains no chainsaws or Necronomicons. Instead, it magically (or I guess spiritually, since Christians don’t like magic) transforms into a cozy cottage straight out of a beer commercial. Even weirder, it’s now home to Octavia Spencer, who immediately says that she’s God. Also there are a flannel-clad Jesus and an Asian lady who’s apparently the Holy Spirit. Yeah, it’s the Holy Trinity, chilling out and enjoying their Carlsberg years.
Through a series of painfully long conversations, they convince Mack not to give up on his faith, embrace life, and maybe spruce up his living room with some Crate & Barrel chairs and assorted Martha Stewart bullshit. Jesus casually walks on water:
God listens to an iPod, for some reason:
And they show Mack a whole bunch of psychedelic ghosts out in a pasture, like Field Of Dreams mixed with Tron mixed with MDMA. Even more like Field Of Dreams, one of the ghosts is Mack’s dad. Who, if you’ll remember, was a real piece of shit. Mack hugs him, obviously.
In the end, God shows Mack where his daughter’s body was hidden, and they have a funeral for her. Which is nice and all, but maybe it would have been even nicer if, you know, his wife were there too? Or his kids? Hey, God, why is this one dude the only one who gets some damn closure?
2
iBoy: Netflix’s Weird-Ass Superhero Movie
While it sounds like a movie about Steve Jobs’ prepubescent years, iBoy is actually a Netflix production starring Arya Stark and … umm, some guy who knows Arya Stark. Its story of a teenage boy with an unrequited crush on his neighbor takes a sharp turn when he walks in on a gang of masked thugs sexually assaulting her (bullshit rape storylines seem to follow Game Of Thrones actors around). The kid flees, but as he’s calling the cops, he gets shot in the head.
Instead of, you know, immediately killing him, the pieces of exploded phone embed themselves in his brain …
… which give him superpowers. More specifically, he can psychically read and even control smartphones. And of course the human cellphone uses his powers to fight crime like a tween-friendly Dark Knight.
You may be wondering how he actually fights bad guys. After all, having Google Maps and Shazam coursing through your cerebral cortex doesn’t necessarily mean you can kick ass. It’s simple: When he’s cornered by a cadre of thugs, iBoy psychically causes all their phones to explode:
Say what you will about Batman, but even he hasn’t been able to figure out a way to set his adversaries’ balls on fire without lifting a finger.
1
Fuck You, The Book Of Henry
Judging by the box office results, a lot of you didn’t see Jurassic World director Colin Trevorrow’s The Book Of Henry, either because it was savaged by critics or because the poster made it look like the world’s crappiest Choose Your Own Adventure book.
The film tells the story of Henry, a genius kid straight out of a script Wes Anderson started and then threw away. He spends his life making Rube Goldberg devices, playing the stock market, and generally being lauded for how brilliant he is. We never find out who his father was, though presumably his mom had a one-night stand with an anthropomorphic Screenwriting For Dummies book.
Oddly, his mom is content letting him run her entire life, which seems … unhealthy. She consults with him before financial decisions and sees him more as a sort of surrogate husband than a son. Even Marty McFly would find this dynamic unsettling.
Oddly, the precious, quirky, autumn-leaf-filled indie drama soon becomes very thriller-like when Henry notices that the girl who lives next door is being sexually abused by her stepdad — meaning some genius waltzed into a Hollywood studio and pitched “Rear Window, but with kids getting molested,” and it worked. Henry’s on the case, but no one will take him seriously because the stepdad is the police commissioner (and also played by Hank from Breaking Bad). So with the school principal and child services being total dicks, Henry formulates a plan … to murder the stepdad.
And by the way, we’re just getting started.
Before Henry can go through with his plan, in another twist, it turns out that he has a brain tumor. The titular character dies halfway through the movie. Henry’s little brother then tells the mom about Henry’s dying wish that she read his journal, which contains the elaborate murder plan. Henry is so annoyingly smart that he even anticipated what people would say out loud after he’s dead:
The mom rejects the plan at first, but eventually gets sucked in. She ends up buying a giant hunting rifle and luring her target into the woods during a school talent show:
She comes very close to pulling the trigger, but doesn’t go through with it, because she remembers that Henry was “a child.” Yeah, her arc is realizing she doesn’t have to do everything a young kid told her to. At the same time, the school principal finally decides to do something about the sex abuse. Why does she come to this conclusion? Because the girl’s dance at the talent show is just so pathos-filled.
What made The Book Of Henry a next-level debacle wasn’t simply its critical lambasting, paltry box office receipts, or “bloodstained Mad Libs you found at an abandoned bus station on Halloween” of a plot. No, it’s the fact that its utter craptitude might’ve catalyzed Trevorrow’s dismissal as the director of Star Wars Episode IX. This is why you never, ever pursue your passion projects, kids.
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My history with time travel is deep, but it is fraught with confusion. Repeatedly, I have traveled to lands everywhere and across millennia with several Federation crews as a fan of Star Trek and at each turn I have gotten lost. The shame of that is a burden I carry with me always. It was the case when I first watched The City on the Edge of Forever, an episode of the original Star Trek series. In that episode a talking time portal called the “Guardian of Forever” takes Kirk, Spock and McCoy to Depression-era New York where we learn that no matter how painful, one cannot interfere with fate. It happened as I watched Tapestry, an episode of The Next Generation, in which Q allows Captain Picard the opportunity to re-do a decision that can save his life. It was present as I watched Voyager episode, Shattered, when the ship is fractured into different eras of its own history, which poses an enjoyable, but especially bewildering time for this fan. I understand the fascinating ethical and moral conundrums posed by time travel as well as the time and space logistics. It is the simple decisions that alter the time/space continuum that fall well outside my realm of comprehension. In order to correct that after many years of struggling I took a closer look at Robert Zemeckis’ Back to the Future trilogy, which offers basics for the time travel-challenged like me. Following are my observations.
Michael J. Fox and Christopher Lloyd in Back to the Future
Back to the Future is a sparkling adventure movie that has not lost its charm since its release on July 3, 1985. Perhaps a few of the topical visual jokes, which hit the mark in the 1980s are lost to some today, but one can see why Back to the Future was the highest-grossing film of the year and why is sparked two sequels, Back to the Future II in 1989, and Back to the Future III in 1990. Watching these films in succession not only brought back great memories, but also strengthened my time travel know-how.
Back to the Future begins in 1985, or what I call home base year. Michael J. Fox stars as Marty McFly, a teenager from Hill Valley, California whose best friend is lovable, eccentric scientist, Dr. Emmett “Doc” Brown, played memorably by Christopher Lloyd. Doc’s most important invention is the DeLorean he has turned into a time machine. This vehicle serves as the tool by which Marty and Doc travel through time in all three installments of Back to the Future. The time machine is rigged to transport to its pre-chosen year when it hits 88 mph with the place always being a historical or futuristic Hill Valley. I mention that because using the same town in all eras helps people (like me) understand when they are in the story.
Time travel in the original Back to the Future is simple, but each new installment brings transports that are more complicated. Our adventure begins at a shopping mall parking lot where Doc unveils the modified DeLorean, which is powered by plutonium. For details about the technology of Doc’s time machine, you’ll have to watch all three movies in the trilogy because they change depending on era. Anyway, just as Doc is showing Marty how the time navigation works by setting the clock to November 5, 1955, the Libyans from whom he stole the plutonium show up and shoot Doc. Trying to escape, Marty takes off in the DeLorean and when he reaches 88 mph, he transports to 1955.
Doc demonstrates the time traveling DeLorean for Marty
The DeLorean Time Clock Setting in Back to the Future
The fun begins when Marty McFly lands in 1985 and runs into his own mother, Lorraine (Lea Thompson) and father, George (Crispin Glover). Marty begins to affect his future existence almost immediately because his mother falls for him. Hilarity ensues as Marty’s quest becomes ensuring that his mother and father fall in love with each other or he and his siblings will never be born. There is also fun to be had thanks to Biff Tannen (Thomas F. Wilson), the town bully and bane of the McFly existence. In the meantime Doc sets the stage to get Marty back to the future by powering the DeLorean with a lightning strike that’s set to hit the Hill Valley clock tower. They know the exact moment when the lighting will strike because of the future.
Doc and Marty know the exact moment when lightning will strike the Clock Tower by newspaper articles in the future
The story in Back to the Future II begins right after the one in the first movie ends. In fact, it begins on the exact same date in 1985 that the first story does, which means that when you time travel time does not pass in your home-base time/year. That’s a bit confusing, but anyway, Marty has just arrived back to 1985 from 1955 when Doc arrives in the DeLorean and convinces him and girlfriend, Jennifer (Elisabeth Shue) to go back to the future to help their future children. The trio arrive in 2015, but Doc immediately knocks out Jennifer so she does not realize what’s happening. In the meantime, old 1985 Biff saw the three fly away in the DeLorean, which means he learns about the car’s time travelling abilities. More on that in a moment. Marty is able to pose as his own lookalike son and refuses to take part in a robbery, thus saving his son from years in prison. By doing this Marty has completed the task, but he makes a grave mistake when he comes upon a sports almanac that lists all the winners of sporting events for the last several decades. Realizing the danger of having such information at hand, Doc convinces Marty to get rid of the almanac and he does, but Biff finds it and by doing so changes the course of history. This is a cautionary tale for anyone who has ever imagined getting his/her hands on lotto numbers in advance and a statement against time travel itself.
Doc and Marty return to 1985 to find decadence and degradation the orders of the day in Hill Valley. As it turns out 2015 Biff steals the sports almanac and using the DeLorean goes to 1955, gives the almanac to his younger self, and by doing so becomes a millionaire by betting on sports. Not only does Biff become owner of every establishment in Hill Valley, we learn he has killed George McFly and married Lorraine. In short, this 1985 Hill Valley is a complete nightmare. Doc and Marty reach the conclusion that the only way they can fix the future 1985 is to go back to 1955 to the exact moment when 2015 Biff gives 1955 Biff the almanac in order to prevent it.
Old Biff gives Young Biff the sports almanac
Biff wins big on sports betting by knowing the winners beforehand
Recognizable adventures greet Marty in 1955 this time as he tries to recover the sports almanac from young Biff. The freaky part of this trip to the past is that the Marty in this second Back to the Future installment witnesses the happenings of the Marty that went to 1955 in the first movie. This is confusing because in all my previous experience with time travel alternate universes never meet. I think. These are clever scenes with an element of danger. Doc warns Marty to avoid running into himself or the time-space continuum will be irrevocably altered, but…huh? I’m not sure I understand how two Martys can share the same time and space in two separate realities while one can observe the other even though that happened in Star Trek too.
At the conclusion of the exhaustive conundrums Marty faces during his second trip to 1955, he and Doc go to their rendezvous point by the entrance of the Lyon Estates sign to execute their return to their base year of 1985. Marty burns the sports almanac thereby saving his family’s future from degenerate Biff and awaits Doc and the DeLorean to land. However, a problem occurs just as Doc attempts to land the time machine. Lightning strikes making Doc and the DeLorean disappear from sight. Marty is understandably bewildered and saddened at the idea that Doc is gone. As he stares at the sky where Doc was just a moment ago a car drives up the deserted road. A man gets out and hands Marty a letter. This is a “what the heck?” moment that took me a bit of time to digest. The man works for Western Union and tells Marty that they’ve had the letter in their possession for seventy years with specific instructions to deliver it to him at that exact time and place. Marty opens the letter and is immediately exhilarated as he reads the letter from Doc Brown dated 1885, the year to which the Doc is sent when lightning strikes the DeLorean. If I were Marty at that moment I would be very worried about being stuck in 1955 without a means of transporting back to home base year 1985, but this young man proves he has learned a lot from his friend and doesn’t miss a beat in recognizing where he needs to go for help. Doc in 1955.
At the end of Back to the Future II Marty knows he can find Doc at the end of Back to the Future
You may remember that it was on the night of the lightning storm that Doc sent Marty back to 1985 in the first movie. Well, this is the same night and Marty remembers that at the same time that he receives Doc’s letter from 1885, the scientist is by the clock tower just having sent him home. Therefore, in order to go back to the future he has to go back to the past. Maybe that actually makes sense to somebody.
I’m not going to get into the details of Back to the Future III, but it follows the same formula as the others. III begins just as II leaves off and includes an enjoyable trip to the Old West where Doc Brown landed after the DeLorean disappeared from the sky due to lightning. The third movie in the trilogy adds Mary Steenburgen to the mix as Doc’s love interest and brings back the regulars from the other two in earlier incarnations. This one also features some terrific action sequences with a special ode to a classic train, the kind that was central to Old West travel and communications.
In Back to the Future III the DeLorean gets a little help from a train
While Back to the Future II and III don’t quite live up to the original, which was chosen for preservation by the Library of Congress in 2007, the trio still offers a joyful time. It is definitely worth taking the trips back and forth through history with characters we care for. In addition, there are important lessons to be learned. For instance, I have often thought about what it would be like to go back in time and meet my parents as youngsters. Maybe even lighten their loads in life, but after watching the Back to the Future movies I’ve decided that may not be a good idea as it could easily result in my own non-existence. Knowing the lotto numbers in advance also doesn’t seem like that great of an idea anymore. Perhaps the greatest lesson of all, however, is a warning that I caution you all to heed. This is a simple lesson that if learned could save you a lot of time and grief. That is, if it is written that you should be covered in manure; there is absolutely nothing you can do about it.
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Be sure to visit Silver Screenings and Wide Screen World for many more time travel adventures in the Time Travel Blogathon.
I Went BACK TO THE FUTURE to Observe Time Travel My history with time travel is deep, but it is fraught with confusion. Repeatedly, I have traveled to lands everywhere and across millennia with several Federation crews as a fan of…
#Back to the Future#Back to the Future Trilogy#Christopher Lloyd#Michael J. Fox#Robert Zemeckis#Time Travel in Back to the Future
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Tour! A Review of Paper Hearts by Ali Novak, Plus Guest Post!
Paper Hearts (The Heartbreaker Chronicles #2) by Ali Novak Genre: Young Adult (Contemporary Romance) Date Published: July 4, 2017 Publisher: Sourcebooks Fire
“I’m sorry,” he said, slowly untying the ribbon that held his mask in place. “It’s just—I didn’t want you to think of me any differently.”
Somehow I kept my mouth from falling open. I knew his face, but my mind couldn’t accept that he was the person looking down at me.
“My real name is Alec.”
Felicity has her entire future planned. Ever since her older sister ran away, she’s had the full weight of her mother’s expectations on her shoulders. So she works hard to get straight As and save for college.
Except sometimes the best things in life are unplanned—like when Felicity meets a handsome, masked stranger while she is volunteering at a charity masquerade ball. She never thought he’d flirt with her. And she certainly never thought he’d turn out to be a member of the world-famous Heartbreakers band, Alec.
Then Felicity uncovers a shocking family secret. Suddenly, she, Alec, and her two best friends are off on a road trip to find Felicity’s missing sister. And she’s about to discover that unexpected turns have a peculiar way of landing her right where she needs to be…
Paper Hearts is the second book in the Heartbreakers series by Ali Novak. This is Alec and Felicity's story, told from Felicity's point of view. Alec is a hard guy to read, so it's understandable that Felicity has her doubts and doesn't always know how he feels or where she stands with him. Alec is very reserved holds everything in, so he wasn't as easy to connect with as Oliver was. I think he's actually a very passionate and observant guy who doesn't know how to express himself. Give him a chance though. He'll grow on you. Like the first book, our main characters are finding themselves. We get the see the Heartbreakers again, and they've grown on me even more. This is such a fun, tight-knit group of people. The fun they have is infectious and carries through to the reader. And JJ?? I can't wait for his story! He's a hoot, so I know it'll be entertaining. But, I love them all, so whoever's story is coming next, I'm ready for it!
The ARC of Paper Hearts by Ali Novak was kindly provided to me by the publisher for review. The opinions are my own.
Music is a huge component of The Heartbreak Chronicles. After all, the series is about boy band. With that being said, music is also an important part of my writing process. Unfortunately, I can’t listen to music while I’m writing because I find it distracting. However, I do listen to curated playlists while I’m outlining as it helps me imagine scenes and think through my characters emotions within those scenes. Sometimes it’s the lyrics of a song that inspire me. Other times, the lyrics don’t fit, but I’m struck by the overall feel or emotion of a song. The following playlists are a selection of some of the songs that inspired The Heartbreakers and Paper Hearts. They are arranged in the approximate order of events in each book [spoilers ahead]. The Heartbreakers Playlist: 1. “I Wanna Be Sedated” by Ramones This is what I listened to while imagining the first scene of the book, when Stella and Drew visit Cara at the hospital. Cara believes the Heartbreakers are a punk rock band, and Stella, who actually listens to punk rock, gets frustrated with her sister’s ignorance of the genre. The lyrics of the song don’t fit, but I picked the song for a more literal reason—the Ramones are one of Stella’s favorite bands. 2. “Five Minutes to Midnight” by Boys Like Girls Boys Like Girls was one of my favorite bands when I was in high school, so it’s no surprise a song of theirs made it onto this list. To me, this song is about taking a chance even if you’re hesitant. At the hotel in Chicago, Stella is skeptical of Oliver because he has a reputation for being a player. Despite her reservation, she decides to let her guard down because she thinks she’ll never see him again. Also, I think this song captures the fun, care-free vibe of hanging out with the band. 3. “I Knew You Were Trouble” by Taylor Swift Cliche, but also one-hundred precent accurate. Stella catches Oliver in a compromising position. She’s disappointed in him, but she also knew better… 4. “Untouched” by The Veronicas Even though Stella wants to keep Oliver at arms length, she can’t stop thinking about him. On JJ’s roof in Portland, she finally gives in to her feelings and let’s Oliver kiss her. I love this track because the yearning describe in the song is perfect for Stella and Oliver’s second kiss. 5. “Falling In Love At a Coffee Shop” by Landon Pigg One of my Wattpad readers recommended this song to me because of it’s obvious connection to Stella and Oliver’s first meeting at Starbucks. I listened to it on repeat while I outlined their first date at the art gallery. 6. “Too Close for Comfort” by McFly “Was I too close for comfort? You're pushing me out, when I'm wanting in.” I’ve always found this song a little heart-wrecking, and I think the overall tone does a good job representing Stella’s confusion and anger after Oliver betrays her. 7. “Loser of the Year” by Simple Plan Ah, another song that takes me back to my teenage years. The lyrics of this song perfectly capture Oliver’s position as a successful musician and his feelings for Stella. 7. “Here (In Your Arms)” by Hellogoodbye If The Heartbreakers had a theme song, this would be it. And if the book is ever made into a movie (fingers crossed), I would want this to play during the credits. Paper Hearts Playlist: 1. “Hold It Against Me” by Sam Tsui The original version of this song is performed by Britney Spears, but Tsui’s rendition is more romantic. It’s what I listened to while imagining the ballroom scene when Felicity first saw Alec. The lyrics aren’t entirely fitting since Felicity and Alec don’t dance together, but the atmosphere of the track is spot on. It gives you that breathless, chest fluttering feeling of locking eyes with an attractive stranger. 2. “Enchanted” by Taylor Swift Another song I listened to while imagining Felicity and Alec’s first meeting. It captures that magical, fairytale-esque feel of a masquerade ball. 3. “Renegades” by X Ambassadors Felicity discovers Rose’s letters under her mother’s bed and decides to find her sister. She knows her mother will never let her go to San Francisco, but decides the consequence of breaking the rules are worth it. For the first time in her life, she rebels. 4. “Send Me On My Way” by Rusted Root The road trip/adventure begins! 5. “Young Volcanoes” by Fall Out Boy Felicity meets the Heartbreakers. Craziness ensues. 6. “Kiss Me” by Ed Sheeran “I'm falling for your eyes, but they don't know me yet.” Ugh, the lyrics of this song are so freaking perfect. This track is soft and sweet just like Alec and Felicity’s romance, so it’s perfect for their first kiss. 7. “You” by The Pretty Reckless Felicity misinterprets Alec’s relationship with Violet, and as a result, sabotages her own relationship with him. 8. “Don’t Say Goodbye” by Jamestown Story Alec is hurt and confused when Felicity rejects him. 9. “Tear Down the Stars" by The Years Gone By Felicity and Alec reconcile. 10. “Shut Up and Dance” by Walk the Moon Alec and Felicity dance at the wedding reception.
Check out my review of the first book in this series!
Ali Novak writes contemporary young adult romance and is a recent graduate of the University of Madison Wisconsin's creative writing program. She wrote her first full length novel, My Life with the Walter Boys, at the age of fifteen. Since posting the story online, it has received more than 33 million reads and is now published by Sourcebooks Fire. To learn more about Ali Novak and her books, visit her website.You can also find her on Goodreads, Facebook, Instagram, Wattpad, YouTube, and Twitter.
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#ali novak#the heartbreakers chonicles#paper hearts#young adult#contemporary romance#teaser#Guest Post#book review#book tour#Blog Tour
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A reflection on 5 years law talkin’
I’m sat here in my study, enjoying the wind-down of my week of R&R with a cup of tea and listening to some music (I know - just a super hip and fun guy right here), and Human, by Jon Bellion comes on. Only recently introduced to me, but it’s quickly moving its way up my list of favourite songs.
The central thread that runs through the song is the concept that regardless what we do, there will always be seeds of doubt which pervade our inner monologues.
I always fear that I’m not living right So I feel guilty when I go to church The pastor tells me I’ve been saved, I’m fine Then please explain to me why my chest still hurts I spent four thousand on the Mart McFlys Yet I’m still petrified of going broke There’s someone gorgeous in my bed tonight Yet I’m still petrified that I’ll die alone
For me, at least, the first verse (above) took inner-me straight to my career, which on Sunday chalks up 5 very long (and at the same time, very short) years. Which, in turn, inevitably took me to the sitcom-esque (dfn. of, or pertaining to, situational comedies - you’re welcome) slideshow of the last 5 years of my life. And what better place than here than to remember, ruminate and reflect.
I’ve always wanted to be a lawyer - I can’t point to any one thing, event or person which triggered it off. There aren’t any in the family (even historically), nor in any of the family friends who were around growing up. If I want to needle the grandparents, I say it’s because I watched A Few Good Men one day and thought I would look good in a uniform. Intrinsically tangled with those intangible and inexplicable beginnings, however, has been an impulse towards service - whether in the form of government work or in the general sense of a profession - to serve the community in upholding the rule of law.
It tends to take people by surprise that I, with all my trappings of sarcasm and short temper, actually am that idealistic. I do believe that a lawyer should strive to do good by all manner of men and women, not just those who have a large enough bank balance. I do believe that a strong and independent legal profession is necessary for a functioning society. I do believe that a person is innocent until they are fairly found guilty in accordance with law. I do believe that a miscarriage of justice, without being put right, harms everyone; not just those parties before the Court.
I remember my admission ceremony in the old Banco Court - it was the afternoon session on 9 July 2012. Chief Justice (now Governor) de Jersey presided (I don’t remember who sat with him - I vaguely remember Justice Mullins sitting, but not the third judge - it was a Justice of Appeal, I know that). I even remember getting a nod from the Chief Justice when my application was formally moved.
I remember, particularly, the weeks leading up to that day - I won’t go into that here, but it wasn’t the welcome to the profession that I expected or wanted.
I remember the months which followed my admission, and the gradual, sickening, sinking feeling that I had made a terrible mistake. To me, back then, I didn’t help people - I made things worse. I just came along and gave them a massive bill at the end of the day which they couldn’t afford, with little to show for it. I was tired; I was overworked; I was suffering from an existential crisis that made me question the years of planning and study which had led to that point. Not a great position for someone who easily gets into their own head.
I remember the case which turned that around for me - the case that is my yardstick every time I reflect on my time in practice.
I remember having a mention of a debt recovery matter at Holland Park Magistrates Court the next day, and being at my absolute wits end with it. Late in the day, I get a call from my boss - this important client had referred this old lady, and I was to sort it out as a priority. Being in the midst of preparation for Court, I was far from impressed.
So I gave the old bird a call to see what was so urgent that I had to divert my attention from my obviously much more important work.
Turns out, her daughter had recently been granted parole - a condition of that parole being that she wasn’t to have contact with her ex-partner. Her daughter, enjoying time with her children, had been unceremoniously hauled back to prison with her parole revoked - all because, I was instructed, the ex-partner had contacted her, and she had told him where to go, by what means he could get there and had hung up - less than 13 seconds on the mobile call log. The old lady was in a panic and had two little grandsons who were highly upset by mummy being dragged away by the policemen. Me - I was just short-tempered that this was getting in the way of me getting ready for Court.
The very important client who had referred her had experience inside himself, and him being all well intentioned, had filed an urgent application seeking review of the decision to revoke the parole on her behalf. He then, at the last second, told the old lady to arrange a lawyer for the hearing the next day. At least, that was the information I got (turns out, it was just a mention, with proforma directions to be made).
Handily, I had just finished a matter with the legal officer at Crown Law who had the matter on behalf of the Parole Board and was able to beg a favour of her to appear as unpaid agent the next day to adjourn the matter until I had come up to speed (and more significantly, in my mind, had sorted out this debt recovery matter which was clearly more important). She also asked me what our problem with the decision was, as the application (being drafted by a layperson) was as helpful in that department as may be expected. I outlined my instructions, that there was no breach of the condition because my client hadn’t contacted anyone.
If we skip to the next morning, I’m at the Holland Park Magistrates Court impatiently waiting for my matter to be called. My receptionist calls me at least 4 times in rapid succession. On the last attempt, I answer and give her an earful, that I was at Court and nothing could be that urgent - she should know that. She tells me that my opposite at Crown Law was on the line and urgently needed to talk to me. As it transpired, my opposite had dug into the matter overnight and had made some independent enquiries. I was told that the decision to revoke the parole had been made on unreliable (read: no) evidence, and she had recommended that her client withdraws its decision and reinstates the parole. That recommendation had been accepted; the old lady and her grandsons could pick up my client from Brisbane Womens at midday.
I will always remember the call to the old lady - for most lawyers, there was nothing remarkable about a call such as that. For me, it was my Damascene conversion. Five years later, I still remember her name - both hers and her daughters.
There are many more cases which have made me question whether I still want to do this. There are many cases where I find the phrase “who cares what the law says?” or “the client is always right - they pay the bills, they call the shots” gets forced down my throat. The personal offence which I take each and every time one of those phrases gets tossed out is just a series of psychological and emotional paper cuts by this point.
To bring this full circle - I’ll dip back into the lyrics to Human:
See I got GPS on my phone And I can follow it to get home If my location’s never unknown Then tell me why I still feel lost
The cases which give me a sense of drive and purpose, like the one I recalled above, are, unfortunately (and perhaps, naively), few and far between. The work I do for Caxton, on the whole, gives me my professional lifeline back to my ideals and my modus operandi. But - there are times where the balance dangerously shifts, and my inner monologue starts asking whether this is what I want to be doing.
For now, I guess it is.
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