#and my need to love and comfort him is endless
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Astarion doesn't ask for affection because he can't..... yet.
Ah, more tea steeping in this seeming endless sea of thoughts. This brew is a bit strong on the heart. Read with caution.
Warning for game spoilers and talk of abuse.
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This perspective is from game content only. How anybody cannons their relationships or behaviors is perfectly right. No blame, no shame, it's your game.
I was always miffed at the lack of initiated affection from Astarion as a partner. YOU ask him for a kiss. YOU ask him for a hug. YOU ask him to tell you thank you after being an amazing partner and killing a massive beastie just for him! Brat...
But then I had a sudden realization. Given his past, affection is probably insanely hard to ask for. Like it can be for a lot of us.
Stay awhile and listen. (nerd)
Now when I speak of narcissistic abuse I am only speaking from what I know about it. I have no academic or phycology degree on the matter. Just good ol' tossed in the pond and forced to sink or swim experience.
Astarion spent 200 years under the crushing weight of narcissistic / psychopathic abuse. One of the things these types of abusers love to do is take what you love and make you hate it and then make you hate yourself for ever having liked it to begin with. All very nasty business that. But it's one of the main corner stones for the cage they build to control you.
They make you feel as if the request of a simple hug is the most pathetic thing you could ask for. Or the most selfish thing as it inconveniences them. They don't want it, why should they give it to you?
Shame, belittle, degrade, devalue..
200 years with a master who used him like a tool. 200 years with siblings that fought amongst each other so much comfort was a liability. Nights coming home assaulted only to be mocked for your tears. Insulted for your need of comfort.
"Pathetic! Weak! Disgusting! "
Shame, belittle, degrade, devalue..
Affection was nowhere to be found there, I assure you.
And for a Narc. anything given is expected to be "earned" in any way they see fit. And if you were "rewarded" with anything, it comes at high price.
And how dare you not find it fair. You ingrate!
Shame, belittle, degrade, devalue..
Hugs are pathetic. Kisses are an intrusion. Or they become gateways to other unwanted behaviors. To be held...what are you? A baby? The only way you are going to get held, is down.
Shame, belittle, degrade, devalue.. The pattern continues.
But you ask HIM for a kiss. And he says..
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"There is nothing I'd like more."
And he means it.
I'd bet a mountain of gold he wants to just ask you himself. But years of conditioning to expect pain when seeking pleasure probably keeps him in a choke hold. Like rats that are shocked every time they try to eat food out of a dish. They learn it is safer to starve.
"I want to ask Tav for a kiss or a hug, but they might think i'm weak. But if they ask me first then it's them who wants it and they can't degrade me for it because they asked, not me. It's safe then."
"I want to ask Tav for a kiss or hug, but they might reject me for being too needy and shame and berate me for being so selfish or demanding of their time and person. But if they ask they have time and want me to kiss/hug them."
"I want to ask Tav for a kiss or a hug, but my primal brain keeps telling me they might demand more than I want to give in return for it. But if they ask, I have the power of negotiating the outcome."
This leads me to believe he would view sex and affection very differently as well.
Where most find affection safe and nurturing, it's anxiety educing and unsafe. It means there are feelings and if there are feelings there is the risk and fear of rejection or judgment. It's much scarier.
Where most find sex to be connecting and intimate, it's been used so much it's lost any meaning. Something you can do a thousand times over and walk away the second it's done and feel nothing afterward.
This may even be a part of the reason why he wants to stop having sex.
He wants to connect with you in ways denied to him. He wants the experience of being courted, treasured, nurtured. It means so much more to him than sex. It is so much more connecting.
Feeling this way is wretched and lonely. The most basic instinct is to want to seek comfort in the arms of those who love us. But it's broken. The risk is too great.
And it's hard. Because you could be the sweetest most honorable Tav in the whole of Fearun. But after being fed poised apples one too many times, all apples appear poisonous regardless of if is true or not.
I have no doubt that this prickly elf soaks up every second of non sexual affection you give him. And truly is grateful for your patience while he slowly and carefully disarms the safety measures he put in place to survive. The fact that he even allowed you to touch him like that at all was a monumental act of trust. And why not? You are incredible after all.
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I'm going to go ask my elf for a kiss now. And then cry in my cup.
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wheeboo · 2 days ago
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caught in bloom, caught on you | xu minghao
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SYNOPSIS. in which you find yourself becoming a regular𑁋or perhaps more than that𑁋at minghao's flower shop. PAIRING. florist!xu minghao x gn!reader GENRE. fluff, a pinch of angst, hurt/comfort, strangers to friends to lovers WARNINGS. hao basically falls in love at first sight HAHA, mild cursing, implied that yn lost someone close to them, a lot of yearning n pining, kissing WORD COUNT. 8.3k
notes: wheeboo is NOT in their short-ish fic era anymore and is in their long-ish fic era rn 😭 anyway,, i didnt have a title for the fic until hao posted his song on his birthday so... I hope u all enjoy?? this might be one of my faves haha
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Minghao likes these kinds of days.
Thin, irregular shapes of cotton drift lazily across the endless blue embrace of the skies. The afternoon sun carries warmth in its hands that he could feel right through the glass windows of his flower shop. It's almost as if the season of summer itself is breathing through his shop, softly encouraging his little garden to reach for the light.
Minghao runs his slender fingers through the cool edges of a hydrangea, its soft petals a deep shade of prismarine.
Ever since he was younger, his mother had told him that flowers weren't just things to be cared for. They were companions, your friends if you'd let them be, each blooming with all different kinds of personalities.
He likes how the flowers didn't ask for much; they simply needed patience and care, and in return, they gave him a sense of peace that he couldn't find anywhere else.
The sudden chime of the bell pulls him from his thoughts. He straightens up, wiping his hands on the apron tied loosely around his waist, and glances toward the door.
The figure the walks through the door is unfamiliar, yet it's easy to catch the way the sunlight highlights the edges of your silhouette, almost like a halo as you step inside the shop. For a moment, Minghao is simply taken aback by the quiet grace of your entrance, the way the afternoon light seems to favour you.
Your gaze circles around the shop, taking in the rows of flowers with a soft curiosity. There's some sort of quiet hesitation in your movements when you take a few more tentative steps inside, as if you're trying to find the right place to be in this space, just as much as you're trying to find the right flower.
Minghao finds himself clearing his throat, drawing a polite smile across his lips and catching your attention right away.
"Good afternoon," he greets calmly. "Can I help you with something today?"
You glance up at him, a slight surprise in your eyes before they soften.
"Hi, um... Yeah, I was actually looking to see if I could buy some flowers. The shop I went to before closed down, so I've been searching for a new place. It was a bit of a drive." Then you hesitate briefly, before continuing, "I'm not sure what to look for exactly, but something for a first date would be nice."
Minghao's heart stirs a bit disappointingly at that, though he quickly suppresses the feeling away. After all, it's just flowers, and you're simply here to buy them for someone else.
He nods thoughtfully, giving a soft, understanding look.
"Ah, well. Congratulations first of all on the date," he says calmly, though the nerves itches his fingers. "A first date is always special, isn't it?"
"They are," You reply sheepishly, and the hint of a blush to your cheeks nearly resembles the colour of the roses displayed near the window.
"Is there a specific kind of vibe you're going for?" Minghao asks. "I can help you pick something that feels right."
You pause for a moment, eyes lingering on a beautifully-painted vase. "Hmm, I think... something romantic, but not too traditional, if that makes sense? Not something too cliché, you know, but I also want it to feel special."
Minghao simply hums in response, his mind sifting through the variety of options he could think of. There's this odd sense of responsibility within him to make your choice is beyond perfect.
"Roses are always a classic," he begins. "but they're quite conventional, so..."
He can sense you following closely to him as he walks toward another part of the shop.
"These are tulips," Minghao explains, gesturing to a row of soft, voluminous blooms in shades of pale pink and coral. "They're not commonly picked like roses, but there's a nice charm about it. They're meant to represent long-lasting love."
You take a good look of the flowers, and you're amazed by how bright they appear.
"Wow, they're so beautiful." Then you take a small glance up at Minghao, before back down at the flowers. "You must really take care of these flowers to make them look this vibrant."
"I try my best," he mutters quietly, watching as you continue to take in their beauty. "Each flower has its own needs, but with patience, they show their beauty. Much like people, I suppose."
Your eyes flicker back up at him, and for a moment, there's a quiet stillness between you, as if the space between you two is holding its breath. Then you let out a warm, somewhat nervous chuckle.
"I think I understand," You say, taking a step closer towards the tulips  and carefully running a finger over its petals. "It's about giving them space to grow, right? Not forcing them to be something they're not."
There's something about the way you speak, something thoughtful, almost as if you also understand the language of patience he's grown so accustomed to.
"Exactly." He smiles faintly. "That's what I like about flowers𑁋they don't rush. They just exist, and somehow, they slowly become what they're meant to be."
You lift your gaze to meet his, and in your eyes, Minghao sees something more than just curiosity. There's a softness there, a sincerity that draws him in. At his sides, he feels his fingers twitch slightly, but he quickly smooths his hands down his apron.
It's strange how a simple conversation about flowers can make him feel so... connected to someone.
"I think these are perfect," You tell him, eyes brightening with confidence.
A wave of satisfaction washes over Minghao, who nods in agreement.
"Would you like me to wrap them up for you?" he asks.
"That would be great, thank you," You respond with that cute grin of yours𑁋it seems more relaxed now. The thought makes his heart flutter.
Minghao begins to wrap the delicate stems with some brown wrapping paper, carefully arranging them so they're secure. As he ties a ribbon around the bouquet, he can't help but sneak up a glance at you. You're wandering around the shop with your hands clasped in front of you, looking at the other arrangements on display, and he smiles to himself.
He finishes the bouquet and smooths out any remaining creases with his fingertips. When you make your way back over to him, he offers it to you.
"Do you want to write your name on a gift tag?" Minghao asks, holding up a small card and a pen. He doesn’t know why his heart's beating faster𑁋perhaps it's the subtle hopefulness in his voice that will make your name linger longer, even after you leave.
You glance at the pen in his hand, considering it for a moment before nodding.
"Sure, I'd love to," You tell him with a faint smile, snatching the pen from his grasp, giving it a quick click before writing something down, the tip of your tongue just barely peeking out in concentration.
When you finish, you hand the card back to him. He takes it from you carefully, inspecting your neat, intricate handwriting. It's simple, yet there's a certain elegance to it it. Minghao reads it under his breath: For someone special, who I hope feels the same - Y/N.
Y/N, he repeats in his mind.
"I'll finish it up for you now," he says, placing the card with the bouquet. He arranges the flowers once more, making sure everything is perfect before handing it to you.
You find yourself fishing into your bag for your wallet. "How much do I owe you?"
Minghao hesitates for a moment, his fingers hovering over the register, but there's something about the way your features soften and how your eyes meet his that makes him pause.
"It's on the house."
You stop your hands, peering back up at him with a surprised look. "Really? Are you sure?"
"Of course," he assures calmly. "It's the least I can do."
You just blink at him a few times, a soft chuckle escaping your lips.
"Thank you," You let out sheepishly as you take the bouquet in your hands, the ribbon slipping through your fingers as you carefully adjust it. There's a split second that passes where you sneak a glance at the nametag on his chest. "I really appreciate it. I'm sure they'll love them."
Something in his chest tightens at that𑁋they'll love them. Minghao tries not to overthink it, tries to ignore the brief twinge of something unsettling in his chest.
But you're smiling, so he smiles back.
"I hope so," he replies gently, and with a polite bow of his head, he adds, "I'm sure they'll appreciate the thought behind it."
As you walk towards the exit, you take a final look around the shop, eyes lingering on the shelves of flowers, before turning back to Minghao.
"I'll be sure to come back," You say brightly, and the way the afternoon sunlight pours down all around you in the doorway makes you appear almost angelic. "Thank you for everything."
"I'll be here," Minghao responds, offering a small, timid wave of his hand. "Take care."
The chime of the bell above the door announces your departure, and a sigh leaves him.
It's just flowers, he tells himself again. Just flowers.
And flowers𑁋like people𑁋don't rush.
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Minghao finds himself wiping away some spilled soil on the counter, the soft hum of piano music drifting throughout the quiet flower shop. He had just gotten done cleaning up after a busy morning of rearranging a few displays around the shop to tie into the slow seasonal changes that were beginning to take shape outside.
The shift from the warm tones of summer to the cool shades of autumn had arrived, bringing a new, fresh palette for him to play with. Chrysanthemums, petunias, dahlias, and marigolds were beginning to make their way into the shop, taking their place next to the peonies and roses that had been so meticulously cared for.
When the last bits of soil are wiped away, Minghao steps back to admire the beauty of the shop around him, he takes in a deep inhale, letting in the earthy scent of the fresh blooms fill his lungs.
After storing away a few extra vases in the backroom, the chime of the door hits his ears, and Minghao finds himself straightening back up to greet whoever had come inside.
When looks up, however, he freezes for a moment. He catches you standing in the doorway, and Minghao has to blink a few times to make sure his mind wasn't playing any tricks on him.
"Hi, again," You're the first to greet this time, and then that grin spreads across your face once again, one that seems all-too familiar.
Minghao leans against the counter. "Back so soon?"
"I was just in the area, couldn't help myself, you know..." You drawl with a playful shrug. "I actually just officially moved into the city just last week, hopefully to be closer for this new job and well... The drive here isn't as long as before."
Minghao smiles softly. It's an unexpected but pleasant surprise for you to admit all that to him, and for some reason, it makes him feel a little lighter.
"That's great," he responds, pushing himself off the counter as he straightens up. "I imagine that must be a relief. How do you like it so far?"
You step further into the shop, your eyes eagerly scanning the new arrangements he's set up.
"It's been great, actually," You say with a relieved look. "Life has been... good, honestly. I think the city suits me. It's different, but in a positive way, and I'm already surrounded by a lot of nice people."
This warm and genuine feeling tugs at Minghao's lips as he listens to you, adjusting the stems of a vase full of a plethora of zinnias.
"I'm assuming that date from before went well then?"
His words makes the smile on your face flicker, and the change is subtle but noticeable enough for Minghao to catch it, even when he's not directly looking at you. You shift your weight between your two feet, and the way you glance around the shop seems almost like you're trying to distract yourself from something.
"The date didn't go well at all, actually."
Minghao's fingertips pause on the cold surface of the vase, brows furrowing in a bit of surprise.
"Oh, I'm so sorry," he apologises gently, regretting for the sudden change in mood. "I didn't mean to bring up anything uncomfortable."
You let out a small, rueful chuckle, shaking your head. "No, no, it's okay. Really."
The air seems to thicken a little. You could only stand and watch for a few long moments as Minghao moves gracefully around, tending to all the flowers with his usual care.
After a long pause, you finally break the silence.
"It was good at first, I think, then it just became... awkward. Like really awkward. I thought I had everything planned out𑁋good place, nice flowers, all that jazz... but I guess it just didn't click. I think we both kind of felt it." You feel your shoulders deflate in a pit of defeat, a soft sigh escaping your lips as you run a hand through your hair. "I don't know why I just rambled all that. Sorry about that."
Minghao doesn't say anything at first, simply giving you some space, but he feels his heart tighten in his chest. He casts his eyes on you, also unsure why you're telling him this or why it feels important to him, but he knows it's a moment of vulnerability𑁋a rare one𑁋and he wants to handle it with care.
"No need to say sorry," he reaffirms, tone soothing. "Sometimes things don't go as expected, and that's okay. It doesn't mean it wasn't meaningful."
You glance towards him, catching the sincerity dripping down from his words. It catches you by surprise at how almost... comfortable it feels to be open right now, with him. The atmosphere here doesn't demand anything of you.
"As people, we try so hard to make things go right that we forget to just... let them unfold naturally," he says softly, as if thinking aloud. "I think sometimes things don't work out because we're not ready for them yet, or maybe they're not the right kind of flower at the right time. You can spend so much time trying to arrange them, placing them in the perfect spot, hoping they'll just fit… but sometimes they don't. And that's okay."
You can't help but quirk a playful lip at that, but you can't resist the way his words appear to tug right at your heartstrings. "Are you comparing me to a flower?"
"Not just you, no," Minghao replies amusedly. "But I think you could be. A flower, I mean. You're just someone who's figuring out what kind you want to be."
The thought about being a flower𑁋in another life, perhaps𑁋is a bit silly. But you also wonder about other things too𑁋if you're being treated with the same care and attention that Minghao gives to his flowers, or if you're wilting like one that hasn't found the right light yet. And as you gaze around the shop, taking in the beauty of the blooms around you, you find yourself smiling.
"I think I'd like to try and take care of a flower," You announce, determination weaving around your voice and words. "I'm not sure if I'd be good at it, but I'd like to try."
Minghao crosses his arms together, letting out a thoughtful hum while studying you for a few seconds. "I think you'd do well."
For some reason, those few words were enough to send heat crawling up your body and into your face.
"Thank you," You breathe out sheepishly, the corners of your mouth tugging upwards. "Can you give me a few recommendations?"
Minghao just nods. "Sure."
From there, he leads you toward a small display near the front of the shop where a few different pots and seedlings are carefully arranged. He describes a few of them to you. You're immediately drawn to the passion dripping from his tone, and the way he appears to light up when he speaks.
"These might be a good start," he suggests, gesturing to a small seedling. "Marigolds are pretty low maintenance. They need light, of course, but they're easy to grow and care for."
You take a moment to study over the baby plant with sweet curiosity.
"I think I'll start with these, then," You say, glancing back at Minghao. "Something easy."
Minghao's eyes don't stray away from how you admire the tiny plant, how you cradle the pot in your hands to take a closer look at it as if you're already imagining yourself taking care of it.
"Taking care of them can be a good reminder to take care of yourself too," he points out. "They need patience, consistency… and a little bit of trust, just like people do."
You look up at him, a smile tugging at your lips once more, feeling something warm bloom in your chest. His words settle into you in a way that's hard to describe, but they feel right𑁋like they're exactly what you need to hear.
"That's true," You reply, the weight of the sentiment settling comfortably within you. "I guess I could use a reminder like that."
"Shall I wrap it up for you?" he offers.
"Yes, please. Thank you."
After mulling over some options, he chooses the perfect wrapping paper and adds a small note about caring for marigolds. You watch him, mesmerised by the ease in his movements, the care he pours into something so simple. For a moment, you forget about all the bustling noise outside the shop, and all that exists is Minghao and the flowers, his flowers.
As Minghao ties the final knot around the marigold pot, he hands it to you, and his fingertips briefly brush against yours.
"Thank you," You tell him softly. "For everything, really. It's very calming in here."
Minghao's smile widens, almost like he's heard those same words before, and perhaps he has; maybe many people find themselves drawn to his calm presence and the haven he's created in this little shop.
There's a strange warmth that spreads throughout your chest as you cradle the small plant in your hands. "I'll be sure to take good care of it."
A few moments of comfortable silence pass as you both stand there, your eyes drifting around the shop to take in the palette of autumn that colours the space. Yet it's almost instinctive in the way your gaze finds Minghao.
"I hope you won't mind me coming back, you know... to make sure I'm doing a good job with this little one." You gesture to the plant in your hands, a playful tone to your words.
Minghao chuckles, a sound as gentle as the petals surrounding him. "Of course. I'll be here."
"Do you mind if I take another look around with the place? It looks great, by the way."
"Take all the time you need."
And for the first time in a long while, Minghao felt like he wasn't just waiting for the next flower to bloom.
He was blooming, too.
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"Do you have a favourite flower?"
The question rests upon Minghao's shoulders while he waters a cluster of orchids in the back corner of the shop. You're hovering near him, aimlessly trudging your fingertips over, but instead lets the question settle in between the quiet moments.
"I imagine it's hard to pick as a florist, right?" You let out a meek laugh. "It's kind of like asking a painter to pick their favourite colour."
The corners of Minghao's lips curl up slightly, his eyes fixed on the glistening leaves under the faint droplets of water. You can tell he's contemplating the question from the quiet hums leaving his mouth, and for some reason, you find comfort in his patience.
"Not exactly," he says after a pause, his voice steady, thoughtful. "A painter might have a favourite colour, but they don't use it all the time. It's about balance. Knowing when to bring it forward and when to hold it back."
"Ah, so you do have a favourite flower," You tease lightly, nudging him playfully with your shoulder. "You just don't want to admit it."
The brief touch seems to linger in the air, a soft warmth that you both let pass without acknowledging. Minghao gently sets the watering can down and looks at you for a moment, his gaze a little deeper than before.
"In China, we have a lot of flowers that hold meaning," Minghao continues. "It's hard to pick one specifically, but... I've been liking the liánhuā lately𑁋the lotus. It grows in muddy water and blooms above the surface, even despite those circumstances. It also represents purity, resilience, and growth."
You tilt your head as you take in his words. You already knew yourself that you didn't know much about flowers, but there's a certain curiosity that washes over you from how Minghao speaks so fondly about them. Even something as simple as a flower has layers of meaning for him.
"That's really beautiful, I..." You trail off, trying to find the right words. "I've always looked at things really surface-level, you know, like I've always found daisies beautiful because they're so simple and bright, but I never really thought much about their deeper meanings. It's kind of like... I never thought about why I liked them. It's just easy to see them and appreciate them, I guess."
Minghao blinks at you, before lowering his gaze down to the floor. "Daisies suit you."
You turn to him, dazed. "Really?"
Minghao takes a contemplative pause. "Well, they're not only... beautiful to look at, but they brighten up any space they're in."
You feel your feet seep into the floor, sinking deeper as your cheeks warm, suddenly hyper-aware of how close you were standing next to him. And it's the way he acts like he didn't fucking say anything out of the ordinary almost makes you lose it.
"Are you flirting with me right now?"
However, Minghao doesn't seem fazed by the question. Instead, his lips twitch into a small, almost imperceptible smile, and then a few seconds later, your phone rings.
Minghao just offers you a little wave of his soil-painted hand. "Have fun at work, Y/N."
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"Minghao! Can you teach me how to wrap these flowers?"
Minghao casts his attention up from displaying a new set of hyacinths, catching you behind the counter with a bouquet in your hands, along with a small old lady on the other side with a cheerful grin.
There's a subtle tug at the corners of his mouth when he hears you holler for him again, and he brushes his hands against his apron, before marching his way toward you. He steps up to you, taking the flowers from your hand while you beam happily towards the old lady.
"What's the occasion for the flowers, ma'am?" You ask curiously. Th elderly woman lets out a soft laugh, resting her wrinkled hands on the counter.
"It's for my grandson! He's graduating from high school today. Time flies by, doesn't it?"
"Wow, that's such a milestone! Congratulations to him," You exclaim enthusiastically, softly clapping your hands together as Minghao deftly arranges the flowers within the wrapping paper, before sliding it over to you.
He leans in a bit more, almost too close you feel the way his arm brushes against yours and the way his breath fans against your skin.
"Fold the edges like this," Minghao instructs softly, his hands hovering right over yours. "Make sure the paper covers the stems. Too much pressure could break them; too loose could make them fall apart."
You watch as his hands follow yours while you nervously, yet carefully trace the frail edge of the paper, showing you how to make each fold with a care that's almost tender. His close proximity sends strange flutters to your stomach, but you do your best to ignore it.
"Okay, like this?" You question, pulling the paper slightly tighter around the bouquet.
Minghao hums approvingly, letting you hold the flowers while he circles a ribbon around it with ease. His hands brush against yours as he neatly ties it, and the two of you pull back to watch how it delicately falls over the bouquet.
The old lady glances between the two of you with a knowing smile.
"The two of you make such a cute couple! Do you run the shop together?"
You feel your face fire up at that, cheeks burning with embarrassment. Then you instinctively glance over at Minghao, who surprisingly doesn't seem as flustered as you are.
"Oh, um, we're not𑁋"
"They like to help out here once in a while," Minghao adds in smoothly, though you aren't sure if that entirely helps or not. However you know what he's saying is true, because whenever your break for work comes or on your free time, you find yourself naturally walking towards the flower shop to help out at times.
The lady just beams up even more, scooping up the bouquet in her grasp. "Well, it's nice to see young faces working together! You two sure do have a lot of chemistry."
You offer a wave of your hand. "I hope your grandson enjoys the flowers. Congratulations to him once again!"
With that, the old woman offers a small wink before turning to head out of the shop. "Thank you, dear! Take care, both of you." Her delighted steps echo off the walls as she exits the shop.
The shop grows quiet again. You let out a sigh, cracking your knuckles as you turn to Minghao, who was already wiping over the surface of the counter, making quick work of putting things back in order, and for some reason, it still doesn't wipe away the pit of awkwardness you're feeling. You wonder if he feels the same too.
"So," Minghao starts, still continuing to clean without batting a glance at you. "You're taking over my shop, it seems."
You let out a haughty scoff. "I just wanted to try wrapping some flowers for someone. Don't let it get to your head."
Minghao only chuckles lightly, though he keeps his focus on the counter, yet you could only focus on him. You can't help but admire the way his hair falls effortlessly over his forehead, the slight endearing tilt of his head as he works, and how his movements are so meticulously unique to only him. There's a certain aura he exudes that makes you feel strangely at peace, a magic that only seems to reside within the walls of the shop.
"Why didn't you say no?" You suddenly ask, the question slipping out before you could shut your mouth.
Minghao pauses mid-swipe, looking back up at you. "Say no to what?"
"To, uh... the lady back there," You stammer, feeling the heat creep back at your neck. "About us, you know... being a couple."
Minghao remains silent as he tosses the dirty wipe away. For a moment, he seems to be contemplating something𑁋whether the question, the idea, or something more.
Then he just simply shrugs. "I guess I didn't mind it," he replies lowly, and meets your eyes warily. "Does it bother you?"
Your mind goes completely blank at his question. Does it bother you? The simple truth is that you didn't expect him to answer so casually. You were expecting him to probably correct her humbly, in all honesty. After all, it was just a passing comment from a lady who didn't mean any harm behind it.
But... does it bother you?
"No, it... it doesn't bother me. Really," You respond after a pause, voice coming out a bit forced. Your heart is beating super fast right now. "I guess I just didn't expect you to go along with it since we're not𑁋"
"𑁋not a couple," Minghao finishes for you. "I know."
You feel like you're melting into a pile of goo, your thoughts scattering like ants running out of their pile.
"I'm sorry, I'm overthinking," You mumble out, trying to brush everything off with an airy laugh.
Minghao shakes his head. "I should be sorry. I made you uncomfortable."
"You-You didn't, trust me!" You wave your hands dismissively, albeit a bit dramatic. "I was just caught off-guard and didn't know how to respond."
This seems to relax Minghao's shoulders a bit, but not entirely.
"Okay," he says, and his voice is as light as a  wisp getting caught in the wind. "But you'd tell me if you were uncomfortable, right?"
You give him an easy nod, maybe even confident. "I would. I promise. And you'd... tell me too?"
Minghao meets your eyes with a steady gaze, his expression soft but thoughtful. For a moment, there's a subtle shift in the air, and you can feel the weight of his words before he speaks again.
"Yeah," he answers firmly, sincerely. "I would."
When you open your mouth to speak again, your phone dings in your pocket. You squint your eyes to read over the message in your notifications, before closing up your phone.
"My meeting got cancelled." Then you blink up towards Minghao, as if trying to convey an unspoken question to him.
As if the answer wasn't already obvious, Minghao gives you a small, almost teasing smile.
"I don't mind the company," he tells you, then quirks up a brow. "Unless you do."
"I don't mind either," I like being in this place... with you. "Not at all."
Flowers bloom when the time is right. And you don't mind waiting for it.
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When a flower dies, there's a certain routine that comes after it. Trim away the wilted petals, dispose of the stems, recycle them as compost, and plant the next set of blooms.
Minghao hates seeing flowers die.
The sound of crumbling petals tie a knot in his chest, the stillness that follows afterwards is almost deafening. But he knows it's an inevitable part of life. Every flower has its chance to bloom and thrive, and eventually, it will fade.
The flowers don't belong to him, after all𑁋they are simply passing through his care briefly before going to someone else or withering away, like everything else in life. Minghao knows it's unnecessary to hold onto these flowers so tightly, but after being surrounded by them his entire life, it's merely impossible to let go.
The bell chimes as he's composting a few camellias that had sadly wilted, and he gazes up to find a gust of snow following your footsteps as you step inside. A large, black fluffy coat hugs your body and a scarf is wrapped snugly around your neck. However this time, Minghao doesn't notice any ounce of a smile to your face.
He sets the compost bin down and wipes his hands on his apron.
"Y/N?"
There's a very subtle twitch to your expression when he calls out your name.
"Hey," You croak out, voice a bit strained. "Um... is it fine if I buy some flowers?"
Minghao feels something in his chest clench at your tone, but he pushes the feeling away with his usual calm composure, masking away any concern simmering on the surface.
"Sure," he replies, focusing on the shadows that plague over your features. "Is there anything specific you're looking for?"
Your eyes drift away from to look around the flower shop, taking note of the bright, usual blooms that surround you, yet none of them appear are what you're looking for.
"Do you have, um..." You feel like you're already going to regret this. "...anything for a funeral?"
The words float in the air between you both. Minghao's expression falters for just a moment, the calmness that he usually carries slipping as his eyes soften toward you.
"Of course," he says softly. "I have a few options."
With that, he leads you to a particular spot in the shop, where it houses all sorts of flowers with muted colours𑁋white roses and lilies, pale chrysanthemums, and pink and purple orchids all arranged neatly. Minghao watches as you gaze over each flower, but he doesn't speak yet, simply allowing you the moment to breathe.
"These are the traditional flowers for a funeral," he explains finally. "White roses for remembrance, lilies for peace, chrysanthemums for mourning, and orchids for everlasting love."
Minghao has picked flowers for funerals before. He's also seen people hold onto flowers that are long past their bloom, clinging to them as if their presence alone could bring someone back. He's been there too.
It's bit a different when it's you though, and he doesn't exactly know how to explain it.
You plod slowly throughout the display, picking up a stem here and there, but each time, you set it back down as if it didn't feel right. But when you come across the orchids, you linger a little longer on them, tenderly caressing the petals as if you were scared to break them.
"I think I'll choose these ones. The orchids," You murmur, picking up a few stems and showing it to him.
Minghao just nods, taking the ones from your hands and grabbing a few more to finish the rest of the bouquet, moving with careful precision.
"I'll handle the rest, don't worry," he assures you as he gracefully works to arrange the orchids.
None of you choose to say anything more, only letting the diffident silence stretch. For some reason, the shop feels a little more cooler, the air heavier than usual. The only sound is the rustling of Minghao's hands moving carefully over the flowers, the quiet snap of a stem as he trims it with his shears. Outside, the snow continues to fall.
Minghao doesn't press for any details, yet even in the quiet, you have a feeling that he knows. Maybe that's why he's just letting his hands speak for him.
"Here you go." He offers you a neat bouquet of pale lavender orchids.
You step up to him to retrieve it from his grasp, bringing it close to your chest. "Thank you."
Minghao knows he shouldn't let his feelings get in the way, but as he takes note of the slight glassiness to your eyes and small tremble of your hands holding the bouquet, he isn't sure how much longer he can hold it in. He feels guilty when he lets his eyes drift down to your lips for a second, before averting it back up quickly.
The smile you give him is nothing short of fragile, faint, but it's there. And then, with a sudden leap, you find yourself leaning into Minghao's embrace without thinking, wrapping your arms around his body as if he was the only thing in the world that was preventing you from falling down. And in a way, he is.
His arms catch you instinctively, gentle yet steady, embracing around you like flowers petals folding inward for protection. His warmth seeps into you as if he were the sun reaching a flower in the early hours of dawn, and his hand comes up to cradle the back of your head, encouraging you to press closer into his warmth.
You don't cry𑁋not entirely. A single tear slips past your lashes, landing silently against his shoulder. He feels it, but he doesn't move, doesn't say anything, and just lets you... be.
"I'm sorry," You mumble into his shoulder. "I didn't mean to𑁋"
"Don't be," Minghao interrupts softly. "It's okay."
You pull away for a moment to look up at him. He's still holding you. His hands have fallen down to your sides, resting there as if he's held you like this before. The way you're looking at him has Minghao nearly forgetting how to breathe; it nearly urges to him to lean down and close the distance between the two of you.
His gaze lingers on your lips, and for a split second, Minghao almost allows himself to follow the instinct to lean in.
But then he stops himself.
He's not sure what this is, what the right thing to do is. His thoughts are tangled mess of roots𑁋he's always been careful with holding himself back, with promising to wait, yet something about the way you look at him makes it feel like the only right thing to do is to give in.
But he can't. Not yet. Not when you're so fragile and baring yourself raw to him.
Yet he sees the way your eyes flutter at him, the way a crease of question forms in between your brows as if you're also unsure of what this moment is, but there's a longing there too. It's almost pleading. And you lean in a little more towards him.
"Y/N," he breathes out your name, and it's the first time you ever heard his voice shake like that. "We... We shouldn't."
You don't say anything at first, your eyes searching his face like you're trying to read something. You open your mouth, close it, and then, with a slight exhale, you step back, only a little, but enough to let the cool air seep in between you.
"I'm sorry, I..." You squeeze your eyes shut for a moment, letting out a sniffle. "Fuck, I'm sorry..."
Minghao feels his chest tighten. "It's okay𑁋"
"I-I just wanted to feel something for a moment, you know? Everything is such a mess right now and the first person I thought of was you, because I like... the way you make me feel. I like it way more than I should. And that... that it's okay if you don't feel that way too."
Minghao's heart stutters at that, and perhaps the world even pauses too. All words that want to leave him become stuck in his throat, because he knows deep down𑁋from as far back as the moment you walked into the flower shop𑁋that he's felt the same way for far too long.
So, he settles with taking one hand from your side and slowly reaching up to trace your warm cheek with his thumb, his touch delicate as if he's afraid he might cause your petals to fall down. He brushes away a lingering tear that had been drying up on your skin and lets his hand stay there.
"You... deserve way more than just comfort in a moment like this," Minghao starts quietly. "But you're grieving right now, and I don't want to take advantage of that. I don't want to just be someone who's here for a moment, because... you mean so much to me more than that."
Your lips form into a tight, thin line, and you flicker your gaze towards the floor, the heaviness in the air still weighing down on your shoulders.
"Minghao..."
"And if I act on what I feel, it wouldn't be fair to you," Minghao continues, voice trembling slightly as he speaks. "I want it to be because you know what you want. And if you ever give me that chance, I promise I'll be here for you. Not just now, not just in this moment, but... for everything. When you're ready; when you're healed; when it feels right, I'll be here𑁋I always have been."
There's a lump in your throat that you swallow down. For a while, you could only simply stand there, feeling as if you're teetering on the edge of something you can't quite reach. But even as you stand in this stillness, there's something in his words that echoes off the walls of your mind𑁋it's understanding, and it's care, and it feels like a promise.
"I... I know. I just... I'm sorry for putting all this on you. I think I need space to... heal and think." Then you look back up at him, wonder tainting your features. "Will you wait for me?"
The question feels a bit silly to ask, and it makes Minghao's features soften as he looks at you, a warmth in his chest that spreads like the first rays of sunlight breaking through a cold morning.
"I've already been waiting for you," he says, almost cheekily, and it seems to lighten the moment a little. "I haven't planned on stopping anytime soon."
The chuckle that leaves you isn't forced; in fact, it's quite relieving. It feels like the start of something, and Minghao feels a flicker of hope at the sound.
You reluctantly separate yourself away from him, cradling the bouquet of orchids to your chest, and let out an exhale you hardly realise you were holding in.
"I'll be okay, you know," You tell him, even if it's a bit of lie, or half the truth. You can't tell which.
Minghao glances down to your hands, as if you're holding a piece of your heart wrapped up within the petals, before back up to your eyes.
"I know," is all he says.
The world doesn't stop for grief, but it's okay to pause for a little while.
Minghao wonders if flowers ever feel the same bittersweet pull when their petals fall𑁋the ache of letting go, but the quiet hope of something new taking root.
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You haven't stepped foot in the flower shop in a while. At least, not as often as you used to come.
The absence is especially daunting, and Minghao can't help but feel it every time the bell chimes and it isn't you that walks through the door. On rare occasion you'd swing by to say hello during your breaks at work and sometimes, a pretty, shy smile from you before you disappear back into the world outside.
It's strange how easily your presence had come to be a part of the rhythm of his days. He used to wonder how someone like you would be drawn to the boring stillness of a flower shop. But now the place feels more emptier than before you came into his life, the petals around him somehow less vibrant, the air colder, even when the sun streams through the windows.
He tries not to dwell on it, but he can't help the nagging feeling that maybe you've drifted away, maybe things have changed. Maybe he was just a moment for you. And now, that moment has passed.
So he simply spends his days in the shop, moving between shelves of blossoms and arranging bouquets, but his thoughts always return to you. To the quiet moments when your voice would fill the space between the flowers, to the way you cared and tended the blooms even when you had no reason to.
It makes him think that if flowers could speak for us, then what might they say about you? Would they say you were someone who saw beauty in the smallest things? Minghao often found himself wishing that flowers could speak just so he can hear what they would say about you.
But flowers don't speak, of course. They just bloom and stretch toward the light, growing in places where they are tended to, and even in those that have been forgotten.
Maybe that's what Minghao was𑁋a forgotten flower of his own waiting to be seen, to be noticed.
Luckily, he was able to distract himself a bit today with a few deliveries for a couple of upcoming weddings and a new arrangement for the store he was preparing to do in the next few days, along with piles of orders for days. But it still wasn't enough.
As he flips the sign on the window to display Closed, he fumbles for his keys to lock the door. However, the sound of the bell rings through the shop, stopping him mid-motion. Minghao lifts a brow up, not expecting for anyone to show up right as he's about to close up.
And when he looks up, he freezes.
"I'm not late, aren't I?"
It's you.
The way your voice comes out all shaky like you're out of breath, yet soft has Minghao feeling as if he's sinking into quicksand. The sight of you standing at the doorway is a dream he never dares to wake up from.
"You're not," Minghao manages to say, somehow. "You're just in time."
Your lips tug into a small, relieved smile, and it's enough to make the air feel lighter in the shop. You take a few hesitant steps so that you're fully inside, letting the door shut behind you with a faint click.
Your lips tug into a small, relieved smile, and it's enough to make the air feel lighter in the shop. You take a few hesitant steps so that you're fully inside, letting the door shut behind you with a faint click. You take in the familiar, fresh scent of all the blooms and greenery around you, and it hits you in the heart just how much you've missed this place.
"I had, uh… a late shift at work," You explain unsurely. "so I thought about stopping by, but I wasn't sure if you'd still be here."
Minghao just shakes his head, watching as you brush your fingertips over some lilies and baby's breaths that were displayed on a small table near the window. Gosh, he'd do anything to flat out say how much he missed you, how much he'd been thinking about you, but he doesn't.
"Have you been busy?" You ask him.
"A little," he responds. "but manageable, I would say."
"Ah… that's good," You mumble, voice trailing off as you start to make your way in his direction, catching eye on a particular bouquet sitting on the counter behind him. "No-show again?"
Minghao lets out a sigh, and he feels you following behind as he walks towards the counter. He picks up the bouquet in his hand, letting his gaze fall over it.
"Mhm," he hums. "But it's alright, really. Happens more often than you think."
You quirk a brow as your eyes roam over the bouquet, and a particular, almost knowing look stretches across your lips.
"That's funny," You huff, taking the bouquet from his grasp. It held a colourful variety of hydrangeas. "It looks a lot like an order I placed a few days ago."
Minghao's heart skips a beat as he watches you carefully examine the bouquet, his breath caught in his throat.
"This… was yours?" he questions in surprise.
"Yeah, I…" You bite your lips sheepishly. "It was sort of an impulsive thing, I guess."
Minghao only continues to watch as you admire the bouquet, caressing over the delicate wrapping paper and the all-too familiar bow that he would tie all of his other arrangements.
"Impulsive, huh?" Minghao teases lightly, a hint of a smile playing at his lips. "Well, you certainly picked a good one."
You look up at him, a small, tentative smile forming on your face. "I guess I just wanted to get something special. For someone."
Minghao feels his heart sink at that, a flutter of hope and uncertainty colliding in his chest. Someone.
He opens his mouth to say something, but the words get caught in his throat, unsure if it's his place to ask, or if he even wants to hear the answer.
"I see," he says instead, trying to keep his tone relaxed, though there's a hint of sadness to his voice that he silently hopes you don't notice.
You take note of his unreadable expression, over the way his eyes appear downcast and a subtle tension to his posture.
However, this doesn't make you stop from gripping the bouquet tighter in your grasp, and then in the next moment, you're stepping closer and offering it over to him.
"I hope you like them," You state, holding out the bouquet thing as if was the most natural thing in the world.
Minghao glances at the bouquet quizzically, the same one he had just been holding, then back at you. His face shifts between a million different expressions𑁋confusion, surprise, hope, and everything in between𑁋before the tension in his chest eases just slightly as he finally registers what you're doing.
He's a florist, for crying out loud. He's usually the one to be giving flowers to people. Never in his years of practically living in the shop has anyone offered flowers to him. The gesture is practically foreign, yet in this moment, it feels so right.
His fingers graze against yours as he hesitantly takes it from your hands, but you fully let go. Instead, you cover his hand with yours, warmth spreading between you as you gently press your palm against his. His heart is beating in his throat, in his ears, everywhere in his body, and he wonders if you can feel it too.
"I missed you," You declare softly, yet a pinch of urgency behind your words. "I missed you so fucking much."
His chest tightens, and it's as if the weight of everything crushes him in the best possible way. All the time he had spent wondering if you had forgotten about him, if maybe you had moved on, it all melts away in an instant. Because you're here. And you're saying everything he's been craving to hear.
And gosh, does he want to kiss you right now.
This time, Minghao doesn't waste a second. He brings a hand up to cradle the side of your neck as he presses his lips to yours. It's perhaps a bit desperate first, making him swallow down a faint sigh you let out but it quickly settles into something softer, deeper, like two people who've been waiting for this moment for far too long.
He can feel the slight tremble in your breath as your lips move against his, and he pulls back slightly, just to make sure you were still with him.
Minghao lets his thumb lightly caress over your cheek as if trying to memorise the feeling of your skin under his touch, as if he'd been starved for this closeness.
"I missed you too," he whispers, a breath away from your lips. "The flowers did too."
A light, airy chuckle escapes from you. "Oh, did they?"
"Of course," Minghao murmurs, his lips curling upwards against your skin. "They've been waiting for you to come back."
"Well, I better not keep them waiting anymore then, right?" You jest playfully, leaning in back once again.
Minghao doesn't hesitate to meet you halfway. "Nope," he says firmly against your mouth. "I think they've waited long enough."
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orimuraa · 2 days ago
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੭﹕ ̊ ̟ ꒷꒦ Cause I’d do anything to feel your touch - OT7
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꒰ 𝔖𝘺𝘯𝘰𝘱𝘴𝘪𝘴 ꒱┆pda with enhypen ⨾
۶ৎ ot7!enhypen x fem!reader ┆fluff┆headcanons┆kisses, tooth rotting affection┆ wc 824
⤷ 𝐲𝐞𝐣𝐢’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: this is probably my fav ot7 fic in a while that i wrote >.< it was so fun and so cute !! if you enjoyed, pls reblog and share some feedback <3 i really appreciate it ^^
꒰ঌ ℬℴℴ𝓀𝓈𝒽ℯ𝓁𝒻 ໒꒱
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𝑳𝒆𝒆 𝑯𝒆𝒆𝒔𝒆𝒖𝒏𝒈 - 이희승
okay..hear me out
hee LOVES showing you his affection
he doesn't care if you're in public or behind closed doors
he will kiss the heck out of you and always be cuddles up next to you
and if you don't reciprocate it back, he will cry (not literally but will give you the glossiest bambi eyes ever)
so do NOT reject his affection >:c
seungie would love to hold your hand in public because it comforts him <3
kisses on the forehead are his favorite >.<
pls love him ! he's just a baby who wants love and affection :(((
𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒌 𝑱𝒐𝒏𝒈𝒔𝒆𝒐𝒏𝒈 - 박종성
i feel like for jay, you would have to catch him on a good day to publicly show affection
he feels a wee bit shy and embarrassed when he in public so he saves his affection for a more reserved place
BUT he will not hesitate to hold your hand if you're feeling nervous in a crowd
jongie is such a gentleman like that
he'll keep his hand on your waist to make sure he doesn't lose you
"i got you princess"
ashbjw he's so precious
so basically, he's fine with small gestures in public but will turn as red as a tomato if you kiss him in public <3
𝑺𝒊𝒎 𝑱𝒂𝒆𝒚𝒖𝒏 - 심재윤
jakey's so childish that he will always make sure to let everyone know that you're his
hand holding, kisses, holding your waist, sitting you on his lap, etc.
he will do it all if it means that people know you're his
he will also purposely call you petnames super loudly so everyone hears
"baby!?!" "sweets?!?!" "princess!! you're here!!!"
his favorite thing to do in public tho if probably hand holding
jake loves to have you right next to him and it's a way for him to know that you're still right there
he will get super excited if you kiss him in public <3
essentially, he's just one big puppy who loves affection >o<
𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒌 𝑺𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒉𝒐𝒐𝒏 - 박성훈
shy boiii
he's not one to really show affection in public, but he will make sure to make up for it all when it's just you and him <3
his ears turn super pink if someone catches him showering you with affection
he has a certain demeanor for other people, but for you, he's such a softie
BUT what he does like is pinky holding :)
he doesn't necessarily need to always have your hand in his, but he does like keeping small contact with you
so, he loves interlocking your pinkies!
you and him will walk around with your pinkies interlocked and that's perfect for him
not too much and not too little <3
but behind doors, he's very clingy with you :3
𝑲𝒊𝒎 𝑺𝒖𝒏𝒐𝒐 - 김선우
okay okay
i feel like sunoo would be the kind to be neutral
like, he doesn't care about being judged for showing you affection in the public
but he also doesn't like to go overboard cuz then it seems weird to him :/
he does like to link arms with you tho!
he thinks it keeps you guys together without getting separated in crowds very effectively
but he's definitely not the type to always be caught smooching you in public areas
he's happy keeping it minimal in public and then endless affection in more reserved places <33
𝒀𝒂𝒏𝒈 𝑱𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒘𝒐𝒏 - 양정원
hmm okay
so i think wonnie wouldn't feel embarrassed by pda, but he would also get flustered whenever you kiss him without warning
he likes holding your hand and planting kisses on your knuckles <3
and he will most definitely become more affectionate if he notices another guy checking you out
wonnie would also be super cuddly at home and stuff and he likes to follow you around everywhere
he seems like the type to lowkey just not give a care about the people around you when it comes to petnames tho
like, this man will be screaming
"JAGI!!!"
from like, 2 rooms across from you, making you instantly blush because of all the turned heads
but nonetheless, he's your wonnie who is extremely cuddly and affectionate
𝑵𝒊𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒎𝒖𝒓𝒂 𝑹𝒊𝒌𝒊 - 西村 力
we alllll know that riki likes to be perceived as "cool and mysterious"
but he's secretly just a baby who craves attention :((
like hoon, he would be a bit too shy to show any affection in public, but he does make sure you don't feel neglected
so he will steal a kiss whenever no one's around
and then if a person comes, he'll become super nonchalant abt it and continue his "mysterious" vibe
but when it's just you and him, he will pout for your affection if you don't give it to him ㅠㅠ
please make sure to give him many kisses >.<
as we've seen, he loves to have his hair played with
and i feel like that would be one of the very few things he would allow in public
like just waiting around in a restaurant or the subway, he would nudge you to play with his hair
he's really just a big baby who wants kisses :(((
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𝐧𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬: @en-diaries, @k-films, @k-nets
⚘. Perm taglist: @vmpivory, @yuvany, @seozii, @pinknjm, @greentulip, @jomisu, @nxzz-skz, @ancnymcnzjy
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rnnsdrms · 2 days ago
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f1 drivers and popular romance tropes: oscar piastri !!
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DEAREST READER. i have finally let this sweet boy out of my cage. the root of my inspiration for this whole mission. unlike charles’ though, i went completely overboard with this one. i couldn’t help myself 😭 i failed to make it as low as 1k. i wrote it in google docs and it took 6 pages 😭. so, this is for the piastri girlies out there! i hope you’ll enjoy this one because i had a smooth-sailing writing his compared to the others !
CONTENT WARNINGS. reader and oscar’s age are a bit vague, but anything from primary school to secondary school age. this content is sfw but only 18+ can visit my blog. as for minors, you can only interact with this post and the masterlist. stay in your lane and all shall be well. also, r.i.p my english grammar !
WORD COUNT. 2704 words !
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Yep, this boy is the start of it all. When someone said that Oscar Piastri gives off a loser boyfriend-slash-childhood neighbour friends to lovers vibe, I couldn’t agree more. So, I decided to stick with this headcanon for him. 
It’s the kind of story where your parents move into a new neighbourhood due to unique circumstances when you are young, and Oscar’s parents are among the friendly neighbours who greet your parents and you, bringing a welcoming gift to help your family settle into the new community.
When they come to your new house, you spot a boy hiding behind his parents’ legs. When they tell him to say hello, he steps forward hesitantly and extends his hand. You shake it, and he pulls back his hand quickly. Since you and Oscar are about the same age, your parents begin secretly arranging playdates. One reason is that Oscar needs a friend to play with in the neighbourhood, and at the same time, having someone to play with you helps you familiarise yourself with the new surroundings. It’s perfect. Your parents even put you in the same school as Oscar.
Childhood is a blissful mix of shared memories. Every Halloween, you and Oscar go trick-or-treating together, scaring the other kids in the neighbourhood and swapping sweets on the sidewalk. During school breaks, your family and Oscar’s often go hiking together or take camping trips to enjoy the crisp air and the vibrant autumn scenery. While the adults set up the tents and prepare the meals, you and Oscar roam around the campsite, finding the best spots to explore. You get along brilliantly with his younger sisters too, much to Oscar’s frustration, because the three of you love to play pranks on him. Whether it’s hiding his shoes before a hike or sneaking extra marshmallows into his rucksack, your playful antics never fail to make him groan. But you can tell he enjoys these moments, rolling his eyes but smiling as he chases after you, trying to get his revenge.
The cold winters are filled with skiing and ice-skating, both of you putting on each other’s competitive spirit to the test by racing one another from one edge to the other, eager to set the fastest time. But when the chill becomes too much to bear, you both retreat indoors, compensating with cosy movie nights to warm the atmosphere and pass the time. Both your parents have grown accustomed to the two of you visiting each other’s homes, to the point where they prepare your ( or Oscar’s) favourite meals every time you (or Oscar) drop by.
You remember how spring is always the most chaotic time for you and Oscar, especially for him, as he also divided his time with go-karting, but you both always manage to find time to study together. You often joke, ‘Aw, what would you do without me?’ and Oscar can only sigh and nod his head in defeat, knowing he’d be completely lost and his grades would be abysmal without your generous help. It is the season where schools overwhelm their students with endless assignments and preparations for the final exams. You and Oscar either do them in the serene atmosphere of the school’s or public library or in the comfort of each other’s homes. The subjects are difficult, but what’s even more difficult is studying in front of Oscar. That isn’t a problem when you are kids. But adolescence literally alters your brain chemistry and body shape, and you realise, over time, that Oscar grows more and more attractive. You never think you’ll ever see him that way. Sure, you always considered him a very sweet and cute boy during your younger days, even though he can be a little mischievous when he wants to. But you can’t quite pinpoint when you started seeing him in a different light.
Summer holidays are filled with camping in the woods, surfing at the beach, and volunteering together at the community centre. There is never a boring moment. But a core memory that will latch onto you forever is the time he suddenly came to your house at night. You are just about to sleep when you suddenly hear constant sharp thumps against the glass of your window. Initially, you are scared, thinking it might be a ghost or something. But you approach it anyway because it wouldn’t stop. When you open the curtains of your window, you see Oscar hiding in the shadows, one hand in his pocket and the other cupping small rocks. You quickly open your window.
‘Are you crazy?! What are you doing?’ you hiss, trying not to raise suspicion with your parents and the whole neighbourhood.
‘Come down,’ he says, his whisper tinged with a slight urgence. ‘I need to talk to you.’
You hesitate, torn between the need to stay in your room and the pull of his words. It’s not like you have never snuck out before in the past, but who knows how long your luck can last. Oscar stands below, his posture firm, insistent. With a deep sigh, you make up your mind. You can’t ignore him any longer.
‘Give me a moment, I’ll come down.’
‘Okay,’ he says, appearing happy that you listen to his request. ‘I’ll meet you across the street.’
Oscar waits for you as you cross the street. You hope he has a good reason for pulling you out into the dark of night. The two of you begin to walk side by side, taking slow steps throughout the quiet neighbourhood. You ask him why he couldn’t wait until morning to talk about whatever that’s bothering him.
‘I’ve made my decision. I’m going to the UK to pursue racing.’
At that moment, a flood of emotions wash over you like a tsunami attacking a seawall. Your mind becomes muddled, preventing you from finding any words to respond to him. But you know how much he loves racing. You have watched him race at the local go-kart track, effortlessly beating other kids. You have seen the pride beaming through him when he stands on the podium, holding a trophy. You have seen the way his eyes gleam and his smile widens every time he talks about his dream: to be able to compete in Formula 1. This has always been what he wanted, and deep down, you know you’d be a terrible person to try to stop him from pursuing what he truly wants in life.
Trying to swallow the shock down your throat, you ask, ‘When will you be leaving?’
‘Next week. My parents bought the plane tickets already.’
You look up at him. ‘Are your family going as well?’  
‘No. It’ll just be me.’ He pauses. ‘But I won’t be alone. I’ll be staying at a boarding school.’
‘Oh, that’s nice.’ Yet, you don’t feel any reassurance or relief when he says that. He is leaving. With each passing moment, denial grips you more tightly. You know this day will come, and it has. He has been telling you for a while now that he might leave Australia someday. But now that you are being represented with this moment, hearing him finally confirming it, still manages to catch you off guard. It is as you expected, you were never prepared for it, after all. The weight of this moment and the silence that engulf you and him presses down on you, like a boulder lodged in your chest.
‘Well, I’m going to miss you.’ You smile, putting up a strong facade. The sadness that tightens around your heart is hard to remove, and you hope the dim lighting of the streetlight and the pale glow of moonlight do not threaten to show the tears welling in your eyes.
Oscar nods, lips pressed together like how one would when they try to hide something. ‘I’m going to miss you too. It’s going to be hard without you around. But I promise I’ll try to call you—and my family—every week.’ He says, sparing you another soft gaze.
You chuckle, and let out a gentle snort.
‘You better.’ You reciprocate his gaze while trying to sound fierce, but your voice cracks just a little when you say it. Yet, Oscar does not seem to notice.
The air between you and Oscar settles into silence once more, albeit it feels heavier than the previous moments as you both continue walking along the pavement. Despite the silence, your thoughts are screaming, louder than anything the night offers that it becomes deafening to you. There are words you have been dying to say. All these years, you want him to know how much you like him, and more than just a close friend—how he has become the only boy you want in this wide universe. You want to tell him how you wouldn’t want any other boys touching you except for his gentle hands, how even a faint of his smile is enough to light up your darkest days. You can guarantee that there is no one else who understands Oscar like you do, and no one understands you like he does.
Should I say it? What if he just sees me as his childhood friend and … nothing more? The words you have been holding back press against your lips, almost bursting out, but you hesitate. You have been debating with yourself for so long–wondering whether you should tell him how you feel. It was now or never.
But what if he doesn’t feel the same way? Just because we are childhood friends doesn’t mean he will reciprocate your feelings, does it? In the end, you can’t risk it—not when everything is about to change. Besides, Oscar’s unbroken silence seems to give you the answer. If he felt the same, surely he would have said something by now. So, you decide that staying quiet is the safer option. You are not about to ruin the friendship you have built with him over something as trivial as romantic feelings—especially not when he is flying to England next week. It just isn’t worth it. So, for the rest of the walk, you decide to stick to safe, meaningless chatter with Oscar. Once the clock almost hits midnight, you and Oscar exchange a brief smile, say your goodbyes, and part ways. (What you don’t know is that as you walk back to your house, Oscar stops in his tracks. He turns around to look back at you, taking in your figure, trying to carve every detail into his memory, as if he is afraid he might forget you the moment he looks away. It is only when you finally vanish from his view, he walks home). 
A few years later, you are in your first year of university. It’s been lonely without Oscar by your side through high school, but he kept his promise to keep in touch with you through video calls. As for Oscar, he has become a main driver for McLaren in Formula I, and you were thrilled beyond words when he shared the news with you. You still can’t believe he is a famous person now.
One day, he tells you he is coming back to Australia during one of the two-week holidays between Grand Prixs, and you pick him up at the airport along with his parents. The moment you see him, you are ecstatic that when you both finally hug, neither of you wants to let go. You can feel the way his arms press against your back, squeezing the air from your lungs. After a moment, you both pull back—although you sort of initiate it first because you are conscious of his parents and sisters watching. 
That night, his parents invite you to join them for dinner to celebrate Oscar’s return, and while you refuse at first, thinking that it is more of a family reunion, Oscar insists that you should come.
After the meal, you help Mrs Piastri clean up before heading home. But just as you are about to leave, Oscar races to the door, calling out, ‘Wait! I’ll walk you back.’
‘Oh, you don’t have to. You must be tired—’
‘No, I’m not. And I want to.’ He cut, giving you an unwavering gaze.
You release a defeated sigh through your mouth, realising there is no point in arguing with Oscar, so you let him accompany you as you walk back home. As usual, silence fills the air at first, heavy and awkward, but after gaining some distance from his house, Oscar finally breaks through it.
‘I have something to say to you … something I should have said a long time ago.’ He begins with a furtive note, making you feel slightly uneasy but curious enough to know.
‘Oh? Is there still something you need to say that you didn’t already say over dinner tonight?’ You joke, trying to ease the atmosphere and him.
You see him hesitate for a moment. Then, he stops walking, and you instinctively stop walking too. Confusion starts to seep into your facial features as you look up at him. Oscar takes a deep breath and exhales the air through his mouth, before looking straight into your eyes with a brand new motive.
‘During my time in the UK, I found myself … constantly … thinking about you. There wasn’t a day I didn’t think of you—well, maybe only when I was asleep. And even then, I sometimes … I dreamt of you.’ He pauses, rubbing the back of his neck nervously as he shifts his gaze downwards to the pavement. A faint pink hue colours his cheeks. ‘I guess I’ve been blind this whole time, or maybe I was just too afraid to say anything before I left. That eventually grew into regret.’
Your heart rate increases with every word he speaks, but your gaze never leaves his face. You can’t believe you are actually hearing this, especially after a few years. You think you might know what he is trying to say, but it sounds too good to be true, and you don’t want to get your hopes too high to protect yourself from the sting of a potential heartbreak.
‘I’ve always liked you, (y/n). More than a friend would. It’s … it’s always been you.’ He reaches his hand out to grasp yours. You almost shudder at his touch, but your desire for him channels through your hold on them, never wanting to let go. 
‘And I hope we can be more than just … friends.’
You stare at him with wide eyes, mouth slightly ajar. His confession has an effect similar to a nuclear bomb. Your mind is reduced to nothing. Oscar, noticing the blank expression on your face and your silence, shifts uncomfortably. But before he can say anything, you quickly avert your gaze, covering your mouth with your hand. There is a feeling of immense happiness and relief swelling in your chest that you can’t help but let tears pool in your eyes. But you pull yourself together, and turn to face him.
‘I never stopped thinking about you either.’ You admit, your voice trembling. ‘It was hard without you here. This place felt so much less like home when you weren’t around. Everywhere I went, everything I saw … It all reminded me of you. I’ve … I’ve grown feelings for you too. But I also didn’t say anything because I couldn’t risk ruining what we have, our friendship, and our friendship is so good.’ 
You take a shaky breath, smiling softly, finally letting your tears fall from your eyes. ‘But I’ve always hoped for more.’
For a moment, the two of you just stand where you are, overwhelmed by the weight of each other’s feelings. Then, out of nowhere, you both start laughing.
‘Oh my god,’ Oscar snorted, placing a hand over his eyes. ‘We’re both so dumb.’
‘Hey!’ You lightly protested, gently punching him in the arm. ‘Don’t lump me in with you!’
‘No can do,’ he teases, bringing his thumbs up to wipe the side of your eyes. ‘We’re together now … for real.’
You gaze at him. Your voice just above a whisper. ‘For real?’
Oscar nods. ‘For real.’
• ───────────────────────────•
SONGS FOR THIS SCENARIO: Taylor Swift – You Belong With Me, SEVENTEEN – Home, Dhruv – double take, lany – sharing you, one more, Jeremy Zucker ft Chelsea Cutler – this is how you fall in love
• ───────────────────────────•
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˗ˏˋ MASTERLIST ˎˊ˗ ✦ ˗ˏˋ KO-FI ˎˊ˗
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RNNSDRMS™. SUPPORT WRITERS BY REBLOGGING THEIR WORK. DO NOT PLAGIARIZE, TRANSLATE, OR POST MY WORKS ON ANY SITE. I WILL POST MY POSTS ON OTHER SOCIAL MEDIA SITES MYSELF AND THAT’S ALL YOU GET.
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himasgod · 1 day ago
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Kinich x Reader and Wriothesley x Reader
Where reader struggles with social anxiety
(I loved making this request! As always, not too specific, to suit the reader's taste. If you have social anxiety, remember to be cautious and find your safe place, don't force yourself on others! I hope you enjoy it <3)
Wriothesley
A celebration at Fontaine Court turns into a nightmare for you, but Wriothesley is there to guide you back to calm.
The lights were too bright. The music was too loud. The constant hum of conversations around you filtered through your mind like an endless hum, making you feel like your ears were going to burst. The room was packed with elegant people chatting easily, but for you, being here was like trying to breathe underwater.
You had tried to stay close to your boyfriend, Wriothesley, seeking his reassuring presence in the crowd, but even he was busy talking to some of the court officials. You had moved away so as not to be a burden, trying to blend into the shadows, but the feeling of all eyes on you was suffocating you.
Your breathing became labored. The lump in your throat grew, and your hands began to shake. The heat of the room became unbearable, and the pressure on your chest kept you from breathing.
You needed to get out of there.
Without waiting another second, you slipped through a side door and found yourself in an empty hallway. The cool air hit your face, but you still couldn’t control your breathing. You leaned against the wall, trying to stop the world from spinning, fighting not to fall apart.
It was then that you heard familiar footsteps approaching.
“My love?” Wriothesley’s deep voice cut through the fog in your mind like an anchor. You didn’t look up right away, embarrassed that he saw you like this, so vulnerable. But he didn’t need you to answer; it was enough for him to see the trembling of your hands and the gleam of your panicked eyes.
Without saying anything, he calmly approached you. His presence was like a protective blanket, covering you from the storm raging inside you. Slowly, he reached out a hand towards you, but he didn’t touch you right away. He knew that in these moments, contact could be overwhelming, so he waited for you to be the one to make the first move.
“I’m here,” he murmured quietly, his tone firm and calm. “Breathe with me.”
It took you a moment, but you finally took his hand. His fingers were warm, his grip firm but not tight. At the contact, something inside you broke and you let out a choked sob, your tears rolling uncontrollably.
“That’s it, keep breathing, my love” he said softly. His words weren’t rushed or forced; he was willing to stay there as long as it took.
Slowly, your breathing began to sync with his. The pressure in your chest lessened, and the lump in your throat unraveled. You didn’t realize how much time had passed until you finally looked up at him. Wriothesley was watching you with those dark blue eyes filled with endless patience, not a trace of judgment in his expression.
“You don’t have to explain anything to me,” he said before you could apologize. “You don’t have to apologize for feeling that way.”
He wrapped you in a warm hug, his arms around you with the security of a refuge you knew you could always return to. “If you feel overwhelmed again, just let me know,” he whispered close to your ear. “You don’t have to face it alone.”
Gratefully, you clung to him as if he were your only salvation. For a moment, everything else faded away, and the world narrowed to the steady beat of his heart, the sound of his even breathing, and the comforting warmth of his embrace.
You didn’t know how long you spent there, but when you finally pulled away, your hands were no longer shaking, and you could breathe normally.
“Are you feeling better?” he asked, his tone denoting more affection than concern.
“Yes... thank you,” you replied in a whisper. A small but genuine smile appeared on your face, something he met with a satisfied look.
“Let’s go home,” he suggested, caressing your cheek gently with the back of his hand. “You don’t need to linger in places that hurt you.”
You took his hand once more, and this time there was no hesitation.
Because with him, you knew you would always have a safe haven to return to.
Kinich
A crowded Natlan market becomes a challenge for you. Kinich, with his gruff but honest style, helps you calm down.
The sun was blazing down on Natlan's bustling marketplace, where voices rose in ceaseless chaos. The air was filled with the scent of spices and roasted meat, and at every step you were hit by a sea of ​​bodies moving around incessantly. The laughter, the conversation, the shouts of merchants calling for the attention of buyers… it all mixed together in a deafening hum that made your heart beat faster than you could bear.
You had thought you could handle it, that you could accompany your boyfriend Kinich without problems while he gathered supplies for his next commision. But the crowd began to close in around you, and you felt panic seep through your veins, stealing your air little by little. Your hands shook, your legs felt like jelly, and the urge to escape overwhelmed you.
Kinich, who was haggling with a merchant for materials, immediately noticed the change in you. His sharp gaze turned to you, seeing how your eyes were wide, fear reflected in them. He knew what that expression meant; he had seen it before, even if you tried to hide it.
“Mh...” he muttered under his breath, eyes narrowing. Without a second thought, he turned to the merchant and tossed a handful of coins in his direction, leaving the materials uncollected.
He didn’t care at all that he had lost the bargain, not when you were on the verge of a panic attack.
He pushed through the crowd until he reached your side, his brow furrowed and his eyes filled with concern disguised as impatience. “Hey, look at me,” he ordered in his deep, but not aggressive voice. His calloused hand caught yours, squeezing it firmly, anchoring you to reality.
You couldn’t find your voice, but you felt the comforting pressure of his hand. Kinich leaned towards you, making a barrier between you and the crowd that continued to move around him as if nothing was happening. “Come on, breathe,” he told you, more gently this time. “Breathe in. Breathe out. It’s not the damn end of the world.”
His words were abrupt, but that didn’t make them any less effective. You knew his style: direct, blunt, but filled with a sincerity that made you feel safe. Focusing on his voice and the warmth radiating from his body, you managed to take a deep breath, though you still felt the lump in your chest.
“That’s it,” Kinich murmured as he saw you starting to regain control. His fingers, though rough, traced a small circle on the back of your hand. It was a gesture he probably didn’t realize he was doing, but it always managed to calm you down.
Seeing your breathing stabilize a little more, Kinich guided you out of the market without another word, keeping you close. He led you down a less-traveled alley and finally stopped in a secluded corner, where the noise was more distant. He let go of your hand just so he could turn you to him, his golden and green eyes staring intently at you.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were feeling this way?” he asked, his tone still somewhat annoyed, but you knew it was more concern than anything else.
“I didn’t want to bother you… you were busy and…” your words died in your throat as you saw his expression harden.
“Bother me?” he let out a short, incredulous laugh. “You’re more important than a bunch of screaming merchants and their damn arrows. Understood?”
You fell silent, feeling a little foolish for having worried so much about something that, in his eyes, was so simple. But that was what you appreciated most about Kinich. To him, there was no need to complicate things; if you felt bad, he would be there, period. No judgment, no unnecessary questions.
With a sigh, Kinich softened his expression and wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into his chest. The scent of leather and wood that always accompanied him enveloped you, and for the first time all day, you felt like you could truly breathe.
“You’re doing well,” he murmured next to your ear, his voice softer than ever. “But next time… if you feel that way, tell me. You don’t have to face it alone.”
And there, in his arms you allowed yourself to accept his support without reservation.
Because even though Kinich wasn’t the most delicate with his words, he always knew exactly how to make you feel safe in the midst of chaos.
Here is my masterlist, in case you are interested in any more of my work or want to send me a request <3
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puckinghischier · 2 days ago
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This is me not knowing if your requests are open, but I’m gonna slide in your inbox anyways. I’m currently on my period at the moment and want to actually die, so this is me ever so kindly requesting for some tooth-rottenly sweet comfort with my boy. Whether it focuses on the reader struggling during her time of month or just overall seeking some comfort, I will happily accept either scenario
jack may have a reputation for being sassy and dry at times, but when he knows you need it? that man turns into the softest person on the planet.
he’s waiting on you hand and foot, treading lightly, not wanting to upset you any further. he’s speaking softly to you, as not to jar your sensitive state.
he makes sure you don’t have to make any decisions if you don’t want to, giving your tired brain a rest. he picks up your favorite take out, bringing it to you in the bedroom and eating with you in silence, never making you converse if you didn’t want to. he’s doing the dishes, finishing the laundry, running you a hot bath.
the days leading up to your period are always spent with you being a little off. your usual yappy nature gone, an overall sadness to your features and tone, and the random bouts of tears and extreme insecurity.
he hates it for you, knowing it’s not who you are, but also knowing you’re trapped in the endless cycle of falling victim to an upset in hormones that tricks your brain, every month. he wants nothing more than to help, but he can’t crawl in your brain and take the thoughts away. so, he does what he can.
he brings you your heating pad and meds anytime you so much as wince in discomfort. he holds you while giving your belly a gentle massage, trying to counteract the painful cramps radiating through your lower body. he make sure you have all of your favorite foods on hand. he watches your favorite movies and holds you when your emotions finally boil over. he reassures you that he loves you, more than you’ll ever know, and he’ll always be there when you need him.
he doesn’t mind being your rock. in fact, he loves it. he loves knowing he’s the only person that can bring you comfort when you need it most. he loves being the person you reach for when you want to be held while you cry over the notebook for the thousandth time. he loves the quality time he always gets with you during this week each month (unless he’s on a roadie) because you don’t want to go anywhere. he loves how you cling to him like a koala, his mere touch enough to relax your entire body.
he wants to be any and everything you need. he loves that most of time, your relationship is happy, go-lucky fun. he loves the banter you two have and the natural back and forth of your conversations. but he loves this, too. the domesticity of it all. he loves being able to switch to this soft, caretaker persona for a week each month. he never understood the way his parents always seemed to enjoy dotting on the other when they were sick or upset, but now he does.
he knows now, that the simplest, yet most rewarding, thing you can do for your partner is to simply be there. to anticipate their needs and show them the physical representation of your love. to be their comfort when nothing else in this world soothes them. be their voice of reason, even when their brain is working against them. reminding them that even in their weakest moments, they are deserving of softness, deserving of peace, and deserving of love.
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foodtruckery · 2 days ago
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oh my GOD you are so big brain the idea of stan resorting to prostitution when theyre trapped between dimensions and it forcing both of them to come to terms with their issues through what im sure would be a really ugly argument
why am i now imagining ford looping the way stan's voice sounded through his head. wrecked and strained and ford's stupidly big brain is happily filling the gaps in for him about what stan did to sound like that. all the gritty details of imagining stan getting on his knees for someone, how rough it mustve been for him to have slightly red eyes. did they pull on stans hair? was he nothing but a willing hole, relaxing his throat to let them in? or did he actively reciprocate? did he run his tongue along the underside of their cock and hum something meaningless just for the vibration?
and then at some point, those visualizations start veering wayyy to close to fantasies for fords comfort when he starts imagining stan kneeling in front of him. his hand is stans hair, yanking him deeper. stan looking up at him with tears pricking at the corner of his eyes from the effort. stan moaning for him just from the feeling of ford's cock shoved down his throat-
i also feel like with a multiverse quite literally endless, it might in the long wrong help ford and stan get more comfortable when it comes to their feelings for each other. hard to draw a line at incest when you see what looks like a living water fountain banging a dishwasher or some other crazy shit like that
(also please dont feel pressure to answer asks fast! youve got your own life and your own responsibilities and theres no rush to get to anything i send you i just like to chat :D)
-🐶
MY FRIEND!! thank you for being patient with me! the last week and a half have been WILD and i have been chomping at the bit to get to my ask box! i'm sorry it's taken so long to get to this (and tbh i had kiiiind of hoped i would be done with this piece so i could share when i responded but fuck it! we'll get there! i wanna talk!) but i need you to know that this fuckin ask has absolutely been fueling me through the like. 6600 words i have written of this damn idea so far hahaha. so in exchange for all the lovely inspiration, i will tell you a bit about what i will hopefully be able to finish soon-ish here! cause like. YES. absolutely just love the idea of ford slowly figuring out what's going on and getting caught up on all the little details -- like what the fuck does the dick look like on a dishwasher, right???? how the hell did stan even figure out how to get something like that off?? is the technique applicable to ford's dick???? and honestly, i haven't delved as far into that whole train of thought as i had originally planned to (and might go back and add to it, who knows!) so i just really LOVE coming back to this ask and ruminating on all of THAT.
not to say that we aren't getting at least a LITTLE bit of it, of course! for you, 🐶, a snippet of what i've got so far because this bit in particular was absolutely inspired by this ask!
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httpsdana · 2 days ago
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Could I please request Rasmus Højlund with prompt 3 and 6 from the fluff list? Reader is tired from college or work and wants some comfort. Thank you if possible <3
Soft Serenity~Rasmus Højlund
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・❥・prompt list
・❥・masterlist -> part 2
・❥・who I write for
・❥・a/n: I've got no more requests in my inbox so send me in some to write them <3
3-“I’ve had a long day, and I really need a hug… from you, specifically,”
6-“How come every time you smile, my day somehow gets better?”
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The apartment door swung open, and y/n stepped inside, exhaustion written all over her face. The weight of a long, grueling day at college—it all blurred together—pressed on her shoulders.
Between endless deadlines, group assignments that seemed to go nowhere, and the never-ending to-do list in her head, she felt like a tightly wound spring on the verge of snapping.
Rasmus was sprawled out on the couch, his long legs stretched across the cushions as he flicked through channels on the TV. The second he saw her, his expression softened, his lips curling into that lopsided smile that never failed to warm her heart.
“Hey, baby,” he greeted, sitting up immediately. “Rough day?”
She dropped her bag to the floor with a heavy sigh and shuffled toward him, her steps slow and deliberate. By the time she reached the couch, she was already melting at the sight of him holding his arms open. Without a word, she sank into his embrace, burying her face in his chest.
“I’ve had a long day, and I really need a hug… from you, specifically,” she mumbled, her voice muffled against his hoodie.
His arms wrapped around her instantly, pulling her in tight. “I’m right here, sweetheart,” he murmured, pressing his lips against her temple.
The steady thrum of his heartbeat beneath her cheek, the warmth of his hold, the scent of his cologne—it all began to chip away at the tension in her body. She let out a long, shaky breath as his hands moved up and down her back in soothing strokes.
After a moment, she lifted her head to look up at him. His blue eyes studied her face carefully, concern mingling with his usual tenderness, though the soft smile never left his face.
“How come every time you smile, my day somehow gets better?” she asked softly, her lips curving into the faintest hint of a smile.
He let out a soft laugh, his hands coming up to cradle her face. “You’ve got it backward, my love. It’s your smile that fixes my day, every single time.” He leaned down and kissed the tip of her nose, then her forehead
y/n felt her cheeks warm up, but the anxiety of the day wasn’t entirely gone. She sighed, pulling back slightly. “I can’t even relax yet Rasmus. I have so much to do—assignments, deadlines—”
“Hey, hey,” he interrupted gently, his hands sliding down to grip her waist as he gave her a firm but comforting squeeze. “We’ll get it done, okay? I’ll help you. We’ll sit down tomorrow, and I’ll go over whatever you need with you. But for now, you need to take a break, baby.”
“But—”
“No buts,” he said firmly, though his tone remained soft. “You’re running yourself into the ground. You can’t give your best if you don’t take care of yourself first. So, tonight, you’re mine. No assignments, no stress. Just us.”
She hesitated for a moment, but the sincerity in his eyes—and the way he gently tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear—made it impossible to argue. “Okay,” she whispered.
“Good girl,” he said with a soft smile, kissing her cheek. “Now, come on. Let’s get you comfortable.”
He pulling her into his lap and wrapped a blanket around both of them. His arms circled her waist as sjey rested her head against his chest, the sound of his heartbeat lulling her into a rare moment of peace.
“I mean it,” he said after a while, his voice a gentle rumble against your ear. “Whatever you need help with, I’ll do it. I’ve got your back, baby.”
She tilted her head to look up at him, her heart swelling with gratitude. “You’re amazing, you know that?”
He smirked, leaning down to kiss her softly, his lips brushing against hers in a way that made her worries fade just a little more. “And you’re my everything,” he whispered. “Now, relax. That’s an order.”
As he began peppering kisses along her jaw and cheeks, a genuine smile crept onto her face. For the first time all day, she felt like she could breathe again.
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girlwithadragonheart · 3 days ago
Text
Chapter 6 - Strained Ties
This story contains major spoilers for Dragon Age the Veilguard. Read at your own discretion!!
Kalais x Lucanis
Summary: As Kalais recovers, stress is high
Word Count: 2.4k
Warnings: Injury, mom and dad fight, Varric comfort
A/N: A shorter one to bridge the gap between events
Chapter 5 DATV Masterlist Chapter 7
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Lucanis paced the length of the room like a caged predator, his wings flickering into view every few minutes, a sure sign his control was fraying. His steps were sharp, almost mechanical, and every so often he shot a glare at the cot where Rook lay motionless.
Her breathing was steady, but she hadn’t stirred since they’d escaped the blight-engulfed fortress. Blood had been scrubbed from her skin, but a faint pallor lingered, and Lucanis couldn’t ignore the faint, almost imperceptible shimmer of lyrium on the wound.
Bellara slipped into the room, her usually commanding presence softened. She crossed her arms, leaning against the doorframe. “You need to rest,” she said gently.
Lucanis didn’t stop pacing. “I can’t.”
“She’s strong. She’ll pull through.” Bellara’s voice was calm, but her eyes betrayed a flicker of doubt. She stepped forward, her voice softening further. “Lucanis, this isn’t your fault.”
He froze mid-step, his back to her, his hands clenched into fists. “Isn’t it?” His voice low, trembling with suppressed emotion. “She threw herself into the middle of that chaos---for me. For all of us. If she hadn’t maybe---”
“You can’t think like that,” Bellara interrupted, placing a tentative hand on his shoulder. “Rook makes her own decisions.”
Lucanis shook her off and finally turned, his face tight with anger and grief. “Then why do they always put her in danger? Why is it always her bleeding out on some battlefield while we stand by and hope she survives?”
Bellara flinched at the venom in his tone, but before she could respond, Spite materialized, sitting cross-legged on a nearby table. “Wake up, Rook. She has to.” he said, his voice carrying its usual edge of amusement, but even he couldn’t entirely hide his concern.
“And what if she doesn’t?” Lucanis snapped, his voice cracking.
“She will,” Spite hissed.
Bellara sighed, her expression softening again. “You’re not going to do her any good if you burn yourself out like this.”
Lucanis didn’t answer, his gaze fixed on Rook’s still form. Bellara hesitated, then quietly left the room, giving him the space she knew he wouldn’t ask for.
Spite tilted his head, watching Lucanis with unnerving intensity. “You’re scared.”
Lucanis glared at him but said nothing.
“Good,” Spite added, hopping off the table. “Fear keeps things interesting.”
❈❈❈
The world was dark and cold. Fog surrounded my feet, curling up my legs with every step. The echo of my footsteps sounded throughout this empty expanse. My arms crossed over my chest, clutching at the skin on my arms. My skin pebbled up from the chill. My chest was tight, and there was a dull throbbing in my side. I couldn’t remember why.
I couldn’t figure out what I was doing here. I remembered Weisshaupt and Ghilan’nain and the archdemon, and then… everything went black. There’s nothing beyond that. What am I doing? Why am I here?
I wandered through the dreamscape, my boots crunching against an endless expanse of broken mirrors. The shards reflected fragments of me---my face, my hands, my past. In one reflection, I was a child, clutching the hand of the magister’s wife. In the next, I clutched my mother’s lifeless body, screaming into the night about the injustice done to us. In another, I was wielding the Dread Wolf’s dagger, blood dripping from my fingertips.
Endless screams surrounded me. Screams of people I loved, people I knew, and people I didn’t. Those I had abandoned in Minrathous. The Wardens that died at Weisshaupt. The slaves and Venatori in that slaver ring I crashed with Varric. Even my own screams surrounded me. 
Every step I took felt heavy, as though the weight of every decision I’d ever made was pulling her down. I stopped at a jagged mirror, my reflection staring back at me with accusing eyes.
“You keep trying,” a voice said softly behind me.
I turned, startled, to see Cole standing there. He was as I remembered him: delicate and earnest, with wide eyes that seemed to see straight into my soul. “Cole,” I breathed. “What are you doing here?”
“I came because you needed me,” he said simply, stepping closer. “You’re hurting.”
I let out a bitter laugh. “You could say that.” I gestured at the mirrors around us. “Look at this mess. Every decision I make, it’s wrong. People get hurt. People die.”
Cole tilted his head, his expression unreadable. “You think you make it worse. But you don’t.”
“Don’t I?” I snapped, the words spilling out in a rush. “I should’ve found a way to save Minrathous. I should’ve stayed out of Weisshaupt. I should’ve found another way to stop Ghilan’nain. Maybe my mother would still be alive if I had listened. Maybe I wouldn’t have---”
“---done everything you could to save them,” Cole finished gently. “You make choices, Rook. Hard ones. But you’re here because you care. Because you want to protect them.”
I looked away, my throat tightening. “What if I’m not enough? I can’t even protect myself, that’s why I’m stuck in this bloody place!” I gestured around, exasperated.
Cole stepped closer, his voice soft. “You are. They’re waiting for you. You can still fight.”
“I’m so tired, Cole.” My eyes teared up.
“I know.” He reached out, brushing his fingers lightly against my hand. “But they need you. He needs you.”
I closed my eyes, tears slipping down my cheeks. “What if I fail again?”
Cole’s voice was like a whisper of wind. “Then you’ll try again. That’s what you do.”
When I opened my eyes, Cole was gone. The mirrors around me shimmered, dissolving into light.
“It’s time to wake up,” his voice echoed. “They need you.”
---------------------------------
The first thing I felt was a sharp, burning pain in my side, pulling her out of the darkness like a cruel tether. I groaned softly, the sound barely audible, but it was enough.
“Rook?” Lucanis’s voice was hoarse, but it was filled with such raw, unrestrained relief that it made my chest tighten.
My eyes fluttered open, and the dim light of the room swam into focus. Lucanis’s face appeared above me, his usual composure shattered. His eyes were red-rimmed, his hands hovering as though he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to touch me.
“Hey,” I croaked, my throat dry and raw.
“Hey,” he echoed, his lips pulling into the faintest of smiles. “You’re awake.”
“Yeah. You look like shit,” I teased. I heard Spite laugh somewhere on the other side of me. I let out a weak laugh as Lucanis scowled at him, wincing as the motion tugged at my wound. “Missed you too, Mischief.”
Lucanis sat on the edge of the cot, his hand finally reaching for mine. He squeezed it gently, as though afraid I might break. “Don’t ever do that again,” he said, his voice low.
“Do what?” I said weakly. “Save your ass?”
“I’m serious, Rook.” He leaned closer, his forehead almost touching mine. “You scared the hell out of me.”
I smiled faintly, squeezing his hand in return. “I’ll try not to.”
“Not good enough,” he said, but his voice softened.
Spite sneered, interrupting. “Rook. Stop. Dying.”
I chuckled, my eyes sliding shut again. “Working on it.”
--------------------------------
I couldn’t tell you when I drifted off to sleep.
The room was dim, lit only by the faint flicker of a lantern on the far table. My head throbbed, and my side ached fiercely, but it was the emptiness that struck me most. Lucanis wasn’t there. The chair beside the cot was empty, the air still heavy with the faint metallic scent of lyrium and blood.
I tried to push myself up, but my body protested immediately.
“Don’t even think about it, Rook,” a familiar voice drawled.
I turned my head, wincing as the movement sent a fresh wave of pain through me. Varric leaned against the doorway, crossbow resting casually over one shoulder, his expression a mixture of relief and irritation.
“Varric,” I rasped. “Didn’t know I rated personal security.”
He smirked, stepping into the room. “You don’t. I’m here for the entertainment value.” He pulled up a chair, flipping it backward to sit. “Although I have to admit, seeing you in one piece is more satisfying than I expected.”
I let out a weak laugh. “Glad to be alive, then.”
“Glad is putting it lightly. The Possessed Peacock was losing his feathers over you,” Varric said, leaning forward, his tone only half-joking. “He’s been pacing around like a wyvern on a leash. Then, when you finally opened your eyes, he vanished. Typical.”
“Where’d he go?” I asked, my voice cracking slightly.
“Probably outside, beating himself up or sulking in the nearest dark corner,” Varric said. His sharp eyes softened. “He blames himself for what happened to you.”
I closed my eyes, guilt and exhaustion battling for dominance. “It wasn’t his fault. It wasn’t anyone’s fault, I didn’t get out of the way fast enough.”
“Yeah, well, good luck convincing him of that,” Varric said, crossing his arms. “Lucanis isn’t exactly the ‘let-it-go’ type, in case you haven’t noticed.”
I sighed, the weight of everything catching up with me. “I don’t know how to fix this, Varric. I feel like every decision I make just leads to more blood.”
Varric tilted his head, his expression thoughtful. “You know, I’ve seen a lot of leaders make a lot of bad calls. Sometimes they’re reckless, sometimes they’re selfish, and sometimes they’re just plain stupid. You, though?” He gestured at me with an almost paternal fondness. “You’re different. You don’t take risks for glory or power. You do it because you care. Too much, maybe.”
“Doesn’t change that people keep getting hurt.”
“People are always going to get hurt, Rook. That’s life,” Varric said, his voice steady, grounding. “But the ones who survive? The ones who make it through because of you? They remember.”
I frowned, staring at the ceiling. “That supposed to make me feel better?”
“Nope,” he grinned, leaning back. “But it’s the truth. And truth has a funny way of sticking with you.”
We sat in silence for a moment, the weight of his words settling over me. Finally, I turned to him, my voice softer. “Am I a good leader, Varric?”
“Kid, you’re a better leader than I ever was,” he said. “Get some rest. I’ll still be here when you wake up.”
I didn’t even have the strength to argue with him anymore, exhaustion taking over.
—-------------------------
I sat propped against the headboard, my side aching, my thoughts circling like vultures. Every breath I took was shallow, careful, as though moving too much would break me open again.
The door creaked, and my eyes snapped to it. Lucanis stood there, framed by the dim light spilling from the hallway. His silhouette was sharp, his wings flickering into view for the briefest moment before disappearing again. He looked hesitant, like he wasn’t sure if he should come in.
“You’re back,” I said, my voice rough but steady enough.
“I never really left,” he said, stepping inside. His tone was quiet, too controlled. “I just… needed space.”
I raised an eyebrow, a sharp laugh slipping out before I could stop it. “Space? From what? Watching me bleed out because I was too stubborn to know when to stop?”
He flinched, and guilt pricked at me, but I didn’t stop.
“Is that it?” I asked. “Because if you’ve got something to say, Lucanis, now’s your chance.”
His jaw tightened as he crossed the room, leaning against the far wall, arms crossed like he was holding himself together by sheer will. “Don’t do that,” he said, his voice low.
“Do what?” I pushed.
“Turn this on yourself,” he snapped, Antivan accent thick on his tongue. “You nearly died, Rook. And for what? Because I can’t handle my own damn messes?”
“Your messes?” I straightened, the ache in my side flaring, but I didn’t care. “We were all there for the same reason—to stop Ghilan’nain. Or did you think I’d just stand back and let you take the hit?”
“You should’ve,” he said, his voice tight. “You should’ve let me. I’m the one who should be lying in that bed, not you.”
“And what good would that have done?” I snapped, standing up despite the sharp pull in my side. I saw a flash of panic in his eyes, his body twitching as my knees wobbled, as though despite our argument, he was prepared to catch me. I stayed upright, meeting his gaze head-on. “Tell me, Lucanis, what would that have solved?”
His hands curled into fists, and he looked away, his wings flickering again before disappearing. “I don’t know,” he muttered. “But I can’t—”
“Too bad,” I cut him off. “I am not your responsibility, and I am not some child to be coddled!” I crossed my arms. “Stop treating me like I can’t handle my messes.”
“I didn’t even make the shot!” Lucanis snapped. “What good am I here if I can’t do the one thing I’m trained for?”
“Lucanis, I—”
“Don’t.” He exhaled sharply. “You should lay back down. Get some rest. Excuse me,” he said, putting a hand to his chest and bowing slightly before leaving.
I stood there, dumbfounded for a moment before sitting heavily on the edge of the cot. The door clicked shut behind Lucanis, leaving me in silence that felt sharper than any blade. My side throbbed as though in protest of the argument, but I barely noticed. His words echoed in my head, layering themselves over my own doubts, my own failures.
What good am I here?
I could still see the flash of his wings, the way his hands clenched like he was barely holding himself together. My fists curled against the blanket. I should’ve said more. Or less. Or something entirely different.
I groaned, dragging my hands down my face, and swung my legs up onto the cot. Lying down was a struggle, my side flaring with pain, but I forced myself to settle. My body demanded rest, but my mind wasn’t interested in complying.
I stared at the low ceiling, counting the cracks in the plaster. Five, six, seven… My throat tightened as the weight of everything—the mission, the fight, Lucanis—pressed down on me. I had to fix this, I just didn’t know how.
My eyes were heavy, and the room began to blur. Sleep pulled at me, unwelcome but unavoidable. In the quiet, I whispered to the darkness, as though Lucanis might hear me through the walls.
“I’m not giving up on you either.”
Even if I didn’t know how to bridge the chasm growing between us.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A/N: I promise things will get better TwT
Let me know if you want to be on the Lucanis tag list!
Tags: @cirillabelle
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freedomsargeant · 13 hours ago
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Complete | Paul Aron
Hello loves! Thought I would make another book now that I'm on Thanksgiving break. My requests are open if anyone would like me to write them a little something! I hope you enjoy it!
Paul Aron X OC
Summary: Paul is unhappy with the race results and Olivia decides to spend the rest of the day trying to cheer him up
Warnings: none, it's all fluff!
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Paul leaned back against his car, eyes fixed on the ground. The pit area was quiet now, the buzz of the race weekend already fading into the usual background of his life. But today was different. Today, disappointment felt heavier. He was lost in thoughts of missed turns and split-second miscalculations when he heard familiar footsteps approaching.
"Hey, you," Olivia said, her voice bright and comforting as she walked up beside him. Her smile, as usual, softened the edge of his frustration, if only a little.
"Hey, Liv," he murmured, trying to keep the disappointment out of his voice.
She tilted her head, looking him over. “Rough day, huh?”
Paul nodded, swallowing back the urge to vent his frustration. His races mattered to him more than anything, and today’s loss—well, it stung. “Could’ve done better. I don’t know...everything felt off.”
Without a word, she leaned against the car beside him, shoulder to shoulder. He felt a familiar warmth, the same comfort that Olivia always brought. They'd been close for years, ever since he'd started racing in junior karting leagues. She’d seen every high and low and somehow never wavered in her support.
“Hey, I have an idea,” she said suddenly. “How about we leave the pit and just...do something fun? Like, something not-racing related?”
He couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at the corner of his mouth. Olivia always had a way of making things better, even if he didn’t quite understand how she did it.
“Alright,” he said, surprising himself. “What do you have in mind?”
* * * *
They found themselves at a small park overlooking the city, and Olivia had come prepared with a blanket and a bag of snacks she’d picked up on the way. Paul realized how rare it was to see this side of life, away from the endless noise of racing, the thrill of speed. He hadn’t really just...stopped in a long time.
They sat down, and she handed him a snack without a word, her usual sense of timing impeccable. She knew he needed a little time to shake off the disappointment.
“It’s okay to feel let down sometimes,” she said, as if reading his mind. “You’re always so focused, so hard on yourself. But, Paul, it’s also okay to just...be.”
“Be?” He chuckled lightly, raising an eyebrow. “I don’t think that’s in my programming, Liv. You know that.”
She laughed, nudging him with her shoulder. “I know. But you can try for one afternoon, can’t you?”
He looked over at her, really looked this time. Her bright eyes, her steady presence...for a moment, the frustration of the day melted away. She wasn’t here to talk about the race, to criticize his laps, or even to ask him why he was feeling low. She was just here for him, exactly as he was.
“You know, I don’t say this enough,” he said quietly. “But...thanks. For being here, I mean. For always knowing exactly what to say and when to say it.”
A soft smile spread across her face, a look he hadn’t seen before, or maybe had never really noticed. “It’s nothing, Paul. It’s just...I know you. I know how much racing means to you. And it’s okay to be disappointed. But you’re more than one race, you know?”
Her words lingered in the air, and for the first time, he found himself really seeing her, understanding what she meant to him. Olivia had been there through every victory, every setback, her presence as constant and grounding as the road beneath his tires. She wasn’t just his friend—she was his anchor.
He took a breath, suddenly aware of how close they were sitting, their shoulders brushing, their faces just inches apart. There was a spark between them, something he’d brushed off or ignored, thinking it was just the comfort of a close friendship.
But now, in the quiet of the park, with her gaze soft and knowing, he realized he didn’t want to ignore it anymore.
“Liv...” he started, his voice catching. He cleared his throat, forcing himself to speak the words he’d been holding back. “I...I don’t think I could do this without you. Racing, life—any of it. You make it...better.”
She looked up, her eyes searching his face, her expression softening. “Paul, I’ll always be here for you. I don’t need you to be perfect. I just need you to be...you.”
He felt his heart pound, realizing just how precious she was to him, how much he’d come to rely on her presence, her quiet strength. Without thinking, he reached over, letting his hand find hers. It was a simple touch, but it said everything he couldn’t quite find the words for.
For the first time in what felt like ages, he didn’t feel the weight of the race, the disappointment, or the pressure. He just felt...complete.
As they sat there, watching the city lights blink to life in the distance, he realized that maybe—just maybe—he’d found something even more valuable than a win on the track.
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wildsaltair · 1 month ago
Text
Nightmare
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Pairing: Maximus Decimus Meridius x reader
Rating: T (hurt/comfort, angst, fluff)
Word Count: 2.3k
Tag List: @enjisbf, @nasatshirts, @empressenchanted
Author’s Note: Up until now I've never posted any Maximus fanfiction because it's always just sort of been something I did for my own enjoyment, but this is one that I don't mind sharing :) @streets-in-paradise inspired me by sharing some Maximus love with me, so this is dedicated to her (and all you other wonderful people who have made Tumblr a place where I can share my passion for this wonderful man)! There's a lot of love poured into this fic, so I hope y'all enjoy it :)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 
You are not surprised to learn that Maximus has nightmares. The details of his past are something you can only guess at, though he has alluded to the terrible battles and bloody escapades that haunt his memories. You also know that his refuge in your home is the first peace he has known since he was a child.
But you are not prepared for the sheer forcefulness of his first nightmare. He’s asleep next to you in bed, pale blue moonlight filtering through the window of your room, but you are awakened by his movements in the middle of the night. He’s jerking back and forth, his face twisted in a look of concentration, agony, and terror. You can’t help the fear that rises in your throat at the sight.
He makes a quiet sound in the back of his throat, one hand gripping the sheets tightly enough that his knuckles turn white. Blinking yourself into consciousness, your heart tightens at the sight. Even all these miles and months away from battle, still his past pursues him in dreams.
His next convulsion shakes the bed, and you instinctively reach out to him, hoping to wake him from the nightmare. It proves to be a mistake the second your hand presses onto his shoulder to shake him awake.
His eyes fly open at your touch, but it’s abundantly obvious that he is not awake, still seeing visions of whatever memory he was in a few moments ago. The look in his eyes is one of pure survival instinct, of a desperation that breaks your heart.
A split second later, you’re flat on your back, and the full weight of his body is pinning you down against the bed. You barely have time to register the shock of his swift movement before you realize that you did not wake him up. Blinded by memory, all he can see is his opponent, and the thought drives you to panic and try to wriggle out from under him.
Grinding his teeth, he grips both your wrists in his left hand and restrains them above your head effortlessly, despite your struggling. You call out his name softly, then more loudly, but still he is lost in the nightmare.
You thought you had tasted his strength before, when he’s made love to you and demonstrated how easily he can hold you in whatever position he chooses, but this situation gives you an entirely new perspective of his strength. A second after flipping you over, his right hand is around your throat, his thumb pressing into your jugular with enough force to crush it.
You’ve never been afraid of him once, but in this moment, without a single hint of recognition in his eyes and all his power focused on choking you, you are so terrified you can barely react. You can’t even use your hands to try to push him away.
Knowing that you may only have a few seconds to react, you gasp out his name as loudly as you can, the word immediately drowned out by the pressure on your throat. Your vision is fading to black a moment later, all the feeling in your hands gone from his vise-like grip.
But your strangled cry reaches past the fog of his nightmare somehow. The pressure on your throat releases, and his eyes widen suddenly, letting you know that he’s finally awake and realizing what he has been doing.
You can never forget the look in his eyes at that moment. All the terrifying forcefulness, the single-minded fierceness, the brute strength that made him such a force of nature on the battlefield — it all vanishes in a split second, dissolving into a gaze of such horror and regret that it shatters your heart instantly. You know that from this moment forward, he may never truly trust himself with you again, a thought that devastates you for him.
You can’t move for a moment, still struggling to catch your breath, and the look of horror in his eyes only increases as he pushes himself off you. He seems torn between the need to gather you in his arms and the fear of hurting you as he just did. His lips move, but no sound comes out.
You draw a ragged breath, reaching out one hand toward him desperately. “I’m all right,” is all you can manage. “I’m all right.”
You try to push yourself to a sitting position, but you find that you simply cannot, still so shaken from thinking you were about to be choked to death by the man you love, who you know would rather die than cause you any harm. His hands are trembling wildly when he reaches out to steady you.
“I didn’t know it was you,” he says, his own breathing so erratic that you wonder if he can feel your pain. “I couldn’t see you. I didn’t know it was you.”
He’s repeating himself in absolute shock, his eyes scanning every inch of your face, your neck, your arms to see what damage he’s done to you. His shaking only worsens, but he doesn’t lay a hand on you during his frantic checking over you for injuries, just lets them hover as if he’s afraid to touch you again.
You manage to sit up this time, steadying yourself with a calming breath and trying to give him a relaxed smile. “I know, I know,” you murmur, reaching out to brush your hand over his ruffled hair. He almost recoils at your touch.
“I could have killed you,” he whispers, involuntarily shifting himself to the edge of the bed away from you.
You keep running your hand lightly through his hair, determined to reassure him. “Of course not,” you promise. “You were only dreaming. It was just a dream.”
“It was just a dream,” he echoes, but not in agreement. “A dream of a battle in which I almost died. In which I killed so many men I could never count them.”
You don’t betray a single hint of fear, just scooting forward to close the distance between you. You use both hands now, framing the sides of his face as his eyes search your face desperately.
“I’m perfectly all right,” you assure him with a smile. “See? No harm done at all.”
“You don’t understand,” he insists vehemently, his voice breaking. “I could have killed you. I didn’t know it was you. I only saw my enemy and thought of killing him.”
Seeing how shaken he is, you push forward and clasp your arms around his neck to steady him. He still doesn’t touch you, doesn’t return your embrace. You can feel his whole body quaking in your arms.
“You don’t understand,” he repeats. “You don’t know what I’m capable of.”
“I don’t need to know,” you whisper in his ear, stroking his hair rhythmically in the way he always responds to.
He actually pushes you away this time, his hands gentle on your forearms as he puts space between you again. His eyes are blazing, his face as white as your sheets. “You don’t know,” he murmurs again, dropping his hands. “I could snap your neck with one twitch of my wrist. I could break your wrists, your ribs, your spine as easily as I can hold you down.” He holds his hands up in front of you, eyes wide and haunted. “You have no idea what these hands have done.”
“I don’t care what they’ve done,” you argue, seizing his hands with yours before he can pull them away. This time, though, he doesn’t make a move to pull away, freezing in place while he watches you carefully. Slowly, intentionally, you kiss the backs of both his hands, his knuckles, his fingers, to demonstrate your words. “I know you, and I love you, no matter what you’ve done.”
He shakes his head, though his eyes drift closed at the touch of your lips on the base of his palms. “No,” he half-whispers, “no, no.” Your heart tightens seeing him so tortured, knowing that all this anguish lurks beneath his stoic exterior every day, hiding so you can’t see it. “I should never have risked you like this.”
“You’ve never risked me,” you insist. “You’ve never done anything but protect me.”
“Until tonight,” he counters sharply, his eyes flashing open and fixing on yours with his typical intensity magnified. “It only takes one time. I should never have taken the risk.”
You can read the meaning behind his words — that he thinks he can’t trust himself to sleep next to you. The thought of giving him up, especially for this reason, is utterly unacceptable to you.
“I am not afraid of you,” you tell him firmly. Your words seem to affect him, because the tension in his shoulders lessens fractionally. You kiss his hands again and again, then rest your cheek against the roughened skin that you love so much.
“You should be,” he replies softly, the severity in his voice already decreasing. You can see the waves of exhaustion and sorrow washing over him, and you reach out your arms to enfold him again. This time, he accepts your embrace, folding his arms around your waist gently and resting his forehead in the crook of your neck. His skin is burning hot against yours, his arms still trembling.
“I could never be afraid of you,” you whisper. “I could never be afraid of the man who has protected me and cherished me. You have treated me so gently, so tenderly all these months. Never once has it crossed my mind to be frightened of your strength.” You press a kiss to his shoulder, then the side of his neck. “I take pride in having the heart of a man so strong, so capable. I know you would never hurt me.”
He shifts you in his arms, lifting you slightly to align more easily against his body. You can feel the deep, shuddering breath he draws while he thinks about your words. “I would never mean to hurt you,” he replies, “but in a dream, I cannot tell the difference between memory and reality.”
“I believe you would be able to keep yourself from truly hurting me,” you reassure him, threading your fingers into his hair at the base of his neck. He reacts to your touch with a hand sliding up your back to cradle you closer to his chest.
“And if I could not?” he whispers in response, his lips pressing against the sensitive skin of your neck. “If I should wake and find you dead by my hand?”
You shake your head, feeling tears spring to your eyes. Any fear you felt in the moment while he was holding you down is completely gone, lost in the tender embrace he holds you in now. “I do not believe the gods would allow such a thing to happen. Not to you. Not to us.”
He releases a shaky breath, one that glides across the exposed skin of your neck. He ducks his head to press a kiss to your collarbone, letting his lips linger there in a way that makes you shiver in his arms. “I am honored by your trust.”
You smile in response, dragging your fingertips lightly down his sides, over the deep scar that slices down his ribs. “I could never trust another man on earth as I do you,” you reply. “My only fear is that I may drown in the love I see in your eyes every day.”
He kisses your collarbone again in response, then moves upward slowly, pressing his lips to the soft hollow of your throat, then the underside of your jaw at your pulse point. Lifting you up effortlessly with his hands hooked under your arms, he repositions you so that you’re straddling him.
He then rests his fingertips, feather-light this time, against the sides of your neck. He strokes his fingers over each mark they left, then presses the softest of kisses against each one. Goosebumps break over your skin at the intimacy of his actions, of the wordless apology in every touch.
He lowers his forehead against yours, eyes closed as he breathes you in. “I do not know what blind fortune allowed me to find you,” he murmurs, touching his lips softly against the corner of your mouth, “but I thank them every moment for the gift of holding you like this.”
At your affectionate smile, he finally gives you the ghost of one in return, though his eyes are still haunted. You suspect that he will retain that haunted look for some time, no matter how many reassurances you offer.
As the intensity of the last while calms, he shifts you in his arms again, cradling you gently and laying you back against the pillows. He leans up on one arm, facing you, and you reach up a hand to stroke the side of his face. His expression softens again, giving you a look of utter fondness and devotion that makes your heart melt.
He leans forward slowly, as if asking your permission, and you gladly grant it. His lips touch yours with a gentle brush, then a bit more pressure. His tongue slides across yours in the way that always sends shivers up your spine, and one of his hands reaches up to stroke your hair, the other resting lightly on your waist. He kisses you once, twice, three times, each one more tender than the last, then lets his lips linger against yours for a moment more.
“I love you,” he says softly that you barely hear it, but rather feel it against your mouth.
“I love you,” you return, “more than I can say.”
One last kiss, and he finally lays down beside you, his face mere inches from yours and his arm folded across your waist. He takes his time in going back to sleep, choosing instead to gaze at your profile in the soft moonlight, but sleep finally takes him. And when you finally close your eyes, content to sleep peacefully beside him again, it’s to the sound of his even breathing and the warmth of his protective embrace.
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sharknark · 28 days ago
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⬇️rant about a really good hengren (reverse renheng) fic i read. link at the bottom give it a whirl
i've never read a fic so well-catered to my tastes before in my life and the best part is that i was so caught off guard by how good it was cuz the tags and summary had me like "right this is some omegaverse-esque, rawr XD mating shit"
but from the very first paragraph i realized it wasn't just ao3-typical possessive mating shit it was (dare i say) IN CHARACTER possessive mating shit. underappreciated dan feng lore is the two hearts shit, duty expects him to smother his own empathy and perform cruelty obediently (and that being in his dragon form literally numbs his empathy towards mortals) but then it's flipped around and he's criticized for being too heartless
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there aren't a great many english fics that take advantage of the 'numbed empathy' thing, so this fic using that to explore the toxic codependency that drove dan feng to making yingxing immortal in the first place is so!
dan feng's dragon heart prioritizing it's own indulgence and power, his human heart screaming against it for empathy and restraint, but both hearts united in this possessive adoration of yingxing... dan feng is possessive to the point of harming his partner, forcing them to take his affection, inherently contradictive to the protective impulse to see the other unhurt.
dan feng makes yingxing immortal in a really sketchy operation, despite knowing that yingxing is literally defined by his pride in being a short-life. he wants yingxing to be with him so badly that he does the one thing that would hurt yingxing the most, too blinded by possession, this sickly overbearing affection, to empathetically respect yingxing's death.
yingxing lived cramming every second he could into his craft and his goals precisely because he has so much less time than all the immortal species around him, but when he's forced into immortality, his hands are scarred and ruined past the point of ever crafting again. he suddenly has so much time, all this time he would've cherished as a mortal, but is totally useless to him now that his purpose for living and passion is gone.
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so there being a scene in this fic where dan feng is moping "yingxing doesn't wanna fuck because he's glued to his workshop", being followed up with a scene of dan heng fucking blade while kissing his scarred hand and crying that he's "so sorry", yeah no shit asshole, his dragon heart got what it wanted, blade has all the time in the world to fuck and nothing competing for his now limitless attention and no one's happy about it.
as arrogant about being a short-life as yingxing was, it really is compensation for the discrimination he faced for it. other immortals looked down on him, so having dan feng, THE top dog, be so deeply enamored with him stirred his own toxic codependent urges. he was so desperate to have dan feng's eternal regard that he's willing to die for him (as in the sedition), his death being the force cementing his place in dan feng's heart forever.
so the fic having yingxing ruminate on this, that he had hoped for dan feng to love him even centuries after he inevitably died, only for the fic to end with:
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yeah yingxing... you left an impression... he made you immortal.... everyone's upset by this
(that's what makes dan heng forgetting blade was ever yingxing to begin with all the more painful because, you went and turned him immortal and when it backfired horrifically you went on and fucking forgot, bitch i'd be pissed to the point of centuries long bloody pursuit of vengeance too.)
here's the fic go read it and leave kudos and a comment, technically porn but i got so invested in the character study that part barely registered. also yeah if you hadn't realized already super dead-dove:
blah blah "renheng is toxic" sorry that's why i like it
#hengren#renheng#txt#fic rec#nsft#idrc about who tops but ppl who are strictly top!blade truthers... give this fic a whirl plz it's so good expand ur horizons#so many other insane ramblings i could have about this fic oh my god the way the cloudhymn magic constantly healing yingxing#parallels blade's selfhealing (a self healing he got BECAUSE dan feng made him immortal)#cementing how his current state really was created by dan feng's desire to keep him and his love eternal URHGHG#ppl have the audacity to say blade is obsessed with dan heng when it was dan feng's obsession that created blade to begin with. kms#and also dan heng's guilt the whole while is 🤌 cuz before he was like. wow. that's SO fucked up. good thing dan feng did it#surely /i'm/ not capable of that -- pan to slow realization that he's still very much dan feng#so the initial rejection of responsibility of dan feng's crimes to realizing that it's deadass just his own crimes he has to atone for#kafka being quietly and subtly comforting of blade and that making dan heng possessive . when the reason blade needs comfort to begin with#is dan heng himself. like. it's so ironic i'll die#more honorable mentions is i love dan heng calling blade 'yingxing' because it's so fucking mean#he's the bitch getting pissed everytime someone calls him dan feng or dares to insinuate he's the same person but he's the exact same bitch#totally doing a 180 on blade and treating him way more kindly after realizing he used to be yingxing#'stop treating me like the shadow of someone who's long gone' bud listen to ur own advice#the unreliable narration between the first two chapters is so fucking good like once you catch on to which dialogue is actually happening#and what was a flashback and etc etc it's SO fucking good#another honorable mention is. lmao. love it when the top cries pathetic men you'll have my heart forever and always#tons of other endless thoughts about and inspired from this fic but give that bad boy a read. so worth#also this author writes sunblade so that's how you KNOW they're enlightened
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ohworm-writes · 1 year ago
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When the girls say to treat yourself, they mean treat yourself.
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gh0stface-k1sser · 2 years ago
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i have. So many things I could say Abt this man.
But he pretty
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Giggling kicking my feet twirling my hair etc etc
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reiderwriter · 1 year ago
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Little Angel
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Pairing: Spencer Reid × virgin!fem reader
Genre: SMUT, some fluff, a little tiny smidge of angst. MINORS DNI 18+
Summary: As the youngest and most innocent member of the BAU, they all take care of their little angel. When they find out just how innocent you are, though, one member takes his possession to the next level. You're his little angel, and he's determined to have you.
Warnings: loss of virginity, loss of innocence, degradation, pet names, oral sex, thigh riding, fingering, cum marking, love bites, Spencer is territorial and possessive, Dom! Spencer Reid, PinV sex, mentions breeding, but he pulls out.
A/N: We've reached Day 8 of kinktober! It's our second "long" fic, meaning there's a bit more plot to this, and the smut scene is longer too (WC is almost 7k!) I hope you love this one just as much as I did... The kinktober masterlist can be found here, and my regular masterlist is here too! If you want something specific, my requests are open ❤️
Your first three months with the BAU were a blur, and for good reason. Endless cases, back-to-back, interrupted only by the slight hint of a weekend or the ever possible death row interview. You were tired, stressed, and afraid to walk home alone at night, and absolutely satisfied. As far as you were concerned, it was all worth it to get these monsters off the streets, to help save their victims and to find out what made them tick. There was nothing else you'd rather be doing. 
The team had helped you settle in well, too. You'd joined the team after Alex Blake had left - she'd recommended you actually from the college seminars you'd taken with her. You were obviously lacking a bit of experience, so they took on two team members, and you and Kate Callahan had the great opportunity of both being the newbie. But you had a slight disadvantage of age, coming in as the youngest member of the team. You thought that might be why you'd settled in so well, in all honesty. 
Hotch and Rossi were both protective in a fatherly way. Hotch pushed you and Rossi encouraged you and that was everything you needed from them. A strong pat on the back at the end of a case and a "you did good, kid," and whatever hell they'd pushed you through, it was worth it. Morgan's tough love was brotherly, but he did a great job at getting you to relax on and off the case, reminding you to not take the work home. JJ and Kate were great mentors. It wasn't easy being women in the FBI, let alone the unit that specifically looked into some of the most misogynistic killings, rapes and abductions in the world. They both gave you tips about how to handle condescending officers, and JJ had held your hair back after you'd puked your guts up on a particularly harrowing day in the field. With Penelope, friendship was easy, and you loved talking to her about whatever hyperfixation you were on that week, loving that there was someone on your team that had filled their life with genuine joy in the face of so much horror. 
And Spencer. Honestly, you were beginning to think that you'd used Spencer as a human stuffed toy a bit too much. 
You don't know how it happened at first, just that after one of your first few cases, you'd been so elated to find a victim alive, safe but traumatised, that you'd thrown yourself into his arms the minute you got back to the precinct. 
"We did it, I thought she was going to be dead, Spencer but she isn't." Your head was pressed into his chest, you were almost surprised he even heard them, muffled as they were. If you weren't so elated, you'd have noticed the way he'd stiffened at your touch, panicking slightly before awkwardly wrapping his arms around you, too. But you pulled away before you could notice that he wasn't really used to any physical comfort, bouncing off to write up your case report. 
Spencer noticed, though. Noticed how the heat of your body made him feel comforted, the way his heart rate increased to 125 BPM from it's base rate and didn't fall back to normal for another half hour. He noticed that you smelt like jasmine and patchouli, and more importantly, he noticed that he didn't really care if you touched him, and that was new. 
It became a kind of ritual for you, finding him after a case and folding into his arms to celebrate. They were friendly hugs, after all, a sign that you'd been through hell together, and you'd made it through like avenging angels. They only lingered longer when the cases went badly. You turned to crying in his arms after you'd discovered the body of a dead street girl, Veronica, in pieces in the house of an unsub who'd committed suicide by cop moments earlier. 
"I told her she'd be safe if she talked to us, Reid. I told her we'd protect her, that I'd protect her." You were so hurt by that failure that he'd had to drive you home that night, holding your hand the entire way so you didn't feel so alone, left to fester in your guilt. 
The rest of the team had begun teasing you about the hugs, but you'd brushed them off. You hugged everyone else too, and you knew for a fact that Penelope hugged every member of the team, so there was nothing special going on between you and Spencer. No one had deigned to inform you of Spencer's germophobia and aversion to touch. 
"Gonna tell me what that's all about?" Morgan asked Spencer as you bounced away from a hug one day, leaving to remove your FBI vest. 
"What what's all about?" He replied coldly, turning away to remove his own vest, replacing it with his blazer. 
"What, you don't have a statistic for how many germs are passed between people during a hug, Kid, come on, you were practically smelling her hair." The older man's eyebrows raised in a question again, but Spencer continued to blow him off. 
"I hug people all the time, it's not a big deal." He shrugged. 
"It took you four years to return one of Penelope's hugs, and you still only do that on special occasions. That's not all the time." 
"Derek, just drop it. There's nothing going on, she just… She just does it sometimes." 
It was when you'd hugged him in the middle of the office, without a case to use as an excuse, that you noticed an underlying tension in the office. You were all celebrating, of course, Callahan had just announced her pregnancy, and you were all so happy for her. You'd heard the happy news and instantly turned and thrown yourself into Spencer's arms. Even you weren't sure why, not even questioning it until you saw the awkward glances on the other profilers' faces. You brushed it off by rushing to give each of them hugs, and running out in a mad flush, needing air, or water or something to get you out of what was looking more and more like an interrogation room. 
A few cases later, the entire team headed to O'Keefe's to celebrate. 
"To another case successfully solved," Morgan toasted, and you all joined him, lifting your glasses in triumph. 
"To the wonders of non-alcoholic beer," chimed in Kate, leaving you all laughing together. The booth was small, and as usual, you'd found yourself sat right in the arms of Spencer Reid. You hadn't intended it, honestly, having slightly avoided him recently, but you'd followed Penelope into her side of the circular table, and Reid had followed you. You were sat squished between them, your arms resting awkwardly on your lap between drinks. 
"Okay, a night of drinking is slightly boring without some games to spice things up, what do you say, hot chocolate?" Penelope said, addressing Morgan who was on her other side. 
"I'm all ears, baby girl. What were you thinking?" 
"How about twenty questions? We already know a lot about each other, let's see what we don't know?" Kate suggested, thriving off of the knowledge that as the sole sober member present, she'd hold all the cards tomorrow. 
"What, how is asking questions a game?" Reid questioned jokingly from beside you. "That's just an interrogation or a therapy session, there's no winner or loser."  
Already slightly buzzing from your drink, you turned to him and out your fingers in his lips, shushing him. 
"No time for logic in matters of the bottle, Spencer. Let's play." He pulled your fingers off him, but nodded, holding them in his grip still as you turned back to the table. 
"I'll start! JJ, are you and Will thinking of having more baby LaMontagne's?" Penelope jumped at the chance to probe her teammate, and you laughed at her enthusiasm. 
"There have been discussions, but I'll not confirm or deny yet." JJ said, taking a sip of her drink as she slyly avoided a direct answer. 
"I always forget why you were so good with the press, Miss No Answers. Okay, your turn to ask a question." 
"Okay, Morgan. Are you thinking of popping the question to Savannah anytime soon?" 
"Did she send you?" He laughed and took a drink. "If I do, she'll be the first to know." 
The game went back and forth like this for a few rounds before Penelope turned the spotlight back to you. 
"Okay, Y/N. You were a college student recently, I know you've got some wild stories. Where's the craziest place you've ever done it?" You knew Penelope didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. She was just an open person. 
But you shifted in your seat nonetheless, trying to figure out if you could answer or even if you would. Your tongue was a bit looser than you expected though, because before you could even finish thinking you just blurted it out. 
"Nowhere." 
The others blinked at you slightly before Penelope dived in with another question. 
"Is that Nowhere, Oaklahoma, or you're just not having sex in crazy places?" 
"No. I'm not… I'm not having sex. Period. Never have." You felt yourself shrink as the other members of the team awkwardly apologised for probing you so much. Really it wasn't that big of a deal, and it wasn't as if you were saving it for religious or moral reasons. But you'd not been the most popular teenager, and you'd started studying serial killers and sociopaths so early that you really hadn't wanted to get so intimate with someone else like that. 
Unbeknownst to you, Spencer's grip on his own drink had tightened ever so slightly, his heart race had picked up again, and suddenly the hand that was holding yours suddenly let you go, quietly dropping your fingers like they were glowing cinders, and he was dripping in gasoline, waiting to ignite. 
Lust. He felt sick with himself for the images that were suddenly flashing through his mind now that he knew you'd never been held in that way, trying not to fantasise about you underneath him, holding him, begging him, feeling all of him. He took another swig of his drink and politely excused himself to get another as he let himself catch some air, as the sudden realization that he wanted you - and had wanted you for quite some time now - finally hit him.
The next couple of weeks were normal, and you were thankful to have that discussion behind you. No one treated you differently, acted like you were more of a child than before, asked you how your dating life was or set you up on blind dates, which was really refreshing actually. You'd let some friends know previously, and that's all they'd done, surprised that you could live ignorant to wonders of sex without shrivelling up and dying. 
The only thing that was different was Spencer. And that wasn't really difference so much as growing more comfortable with each other. He'd rest his hand on the small of your back now in support sometimes, or have a hand slung over the back of your chair when sitting together. He was constantly at your side, especially if you were around male suspects or officers who'd taken a bit of a ballsy approach. 
You liked it, probably a bit too much. You gravitated towards him in a room filled with people, and found yourself hugging him more often, when you left a room, when you entered one, when he looked like he needed it. Which, recently, was all the time. A month went by with this increased comfort level, and soon you found yourself feeling wrong if his hands weren't on you. 
He stood close to you all the time, and you noticed the stares you were getting from everyone else. A few officers who'd approach you would apologise to him when they noticed him at your back, hand on your hip as he pulled you away. 
After one case, you could even swear that you felt more than him than you were expecting. He'd moved away slightly in between one of your hugs, but you'd pulled his arms back around you and stepped closer, pressing your back against his chest, letting your head rest on his arms. Something hard and long wedged up against your ass, and in a split second he was pulling away before you could ask him about it. He excused himself, and you felt your body burn up. It was Spencer, it was just Spencer and that wasn't because of you, it was some other reason. 
Spencer didn't know what he was doing. He grew more possessive over you by the day, and he'd honestly nearly bitten the head off an officer who asked him for your number. 
"Sorry, she doesn't have a phone." 
"But I saw her with one earlier. Look I get it she's FBI, and you guys are-" 
"Okay, so she's not interested."
"Hey, why don't you let her decide that wise guy?" 
"Oh sure, get angry I'm sure she'd love that. She's not interested, she has me." He couldn't help himself from getting in the officers face at that, and Morgan had to pull him back from the edge. 
"Wow, wow, hey, calm down." The officer stormed out, and he felt triumphant for only a second before Morgan rounded on him. 
"Whatever this thing you've got going on, Spencer, you need to get it out of your system as soon as possible." His voice was low and stern, throwing a glance over his shoulder to where you were sitting, staring confusedly through the glass at Spencer, whose eyes refused to move from your own. 
" I just wanted him to back off, she doesn't like him like that."
"No, you wanted him to back off because you've marked her like some animal marking its territory. She's not your prey, Spencer, she's our team member, now you're gonna have to get your act together and leave her alone, because we've got work to do." 
Sighing and throwing his hands through his hair again, he finally looked away from you and gathered his breath. He wanted to stop this too, this horrible perverted feeling of needing his hands on you, wanting to possess you day and night. To protect you. He just wasn't sure if he was strong enough to do that. 
The next time you all went to O'Keefe's he certainly tried. You expected him to follow you into the booth again - he didn't, sitting opposite you next to JJ. You expected him to talk to you or look at you for more than a second at a time - he didn't, avoiding most conversations entirely and keeping his eyes fixed on the bar. You certainly expected him to still be sat at the table when you returned from the bathroom, ready to slip into the seat beside him, force him to talk to you. Instead he was gone, and you scanned the rest of the bar trying to locate him. 
Something green and vile jumped you when you finally locked onto him, stood at the bar, surrounded by other women. Surrounded was maybe an exaggeration, as there were really only two of them, but they were practically draping themselves over him, and for some reason that set something alight inside of you. 
You watched them for a moment, how one of them trailed a hand up his arm as he shuddered away from their touch, the other pressing herself against the bar so her chest pushed up dramatically. The green bile in your throat carried your feet forwards, and before you knew it, you were clearing it from your throat to grab their attentions. 
"Spencer, there you are!" You brightened your tone specifically, as you locked eyes with his panicked ones. The two girls looked you up and down as you moved closer, brushing past them to climb up right into his lap on the barstool, pulling his arm around you as you pressed your ass into his crotch. 
"Are you going to introduce me to your new friends?" The smile didn't reach your eyes as you let your back rest against his chest comfortably, watching the women to see their reactions. The one touching him pulled her arm back instantly, and the other readjusted her dress before they both left silently, carrying their glasses back to wherever they came from. 
You watched them leave a little triumphantly before the green faded, and you realised what you had done. 
"Y/N…?" His voice was hesitant in your ear, and you shivered slightly before pushing off of him. 
"I'm so sorry, Spence, it just- it… looked like you were hard." You panicked again, pushing closer to him. "No, like you were in a hard situation, not that you were," your hand accidentally dropped to his crotch as you spoke your final words: "Hard."
He twitched beneath you as you finally looked down to where your hand was, as his mouth opened to say something. 
"Y/N…" was all you heard before you turned around, and fast walked to the entrance, picking your bag up quickly on the way, and then sprinted the second the cold air hit your face. 
You cursed yourself inwardly as you ran the three blocks more to your apartment, thankful that you were at least in walking (or apparently running) distance. What the hell had you been thinking? Practically sexually harassing one of your coworkers like that, grabbing his dick, albeit accidentally. 
You slammed your door shut behind you, leaning against it and sliding to the floor as you finally accepted that whatever this was with Reid, it wasn't friendship for you anymore. And you weren't sure if it had ever been. 
With your head between your legs, arms wrapped tightly around yourself, you started replaying each moment with him, each touch from the very first. How even the memory of a brush past you could excite a fire in your heart, a heat between your legs growing by the second. 
You wanted to crawl pathetically into bed and not think about him until the next morning at work,  but fate, or Doctor Spencer Reid, had other plans. 
The knock at your door was sudden and incessant, the banging starting loud, and staying consistent until you tentatively pulled it open. 
He was stood there, chest heaving, looking down at you, sweat coating his forehead. 
"Can I… Come in?" He asked, and you nodded, too stunned at his sudden appearance to tell if this was real or just your fantasy becoming a little too realistic. 
He thanked you for letting him inside, and you showed him inside, guiding him to he couch, where you took a seat opposite him. 
"I wanted to make sure you were okay, you left in a rush and…" He trailed off, eyes flicking down to your lips. His Adam's apple bobbed with his swallow, and you watched it yourself, trying to avoid meeting his eyes, as if you were a schoolgirl about to get in trouble with a disappointed teacher. 
"I'm okay." 
"Okay, that's great, that's… Great." His breaths caught up to him, and he took another deep breath and a swallow before continuing. "How about we continue that game from last time. Twenty questions?" 
You'd do anything to stop him walking out of that door, but you felt too shy to touch him again, even in the friendly ways you were used to, so you eagerly accepted. 
"Yes, that… That sounds fun, thank you." 
"Okay. Question one. Do you know why I'm here?" He asks as he shifts closer to you, still not touching, but at a proximity where it would be natural to accidentally brush against one another. 
"N-No. But I might have an idea." He nodded at your response before moving on to his next question. 
"Question two. Are you a virgin?" He didn't trip or stumble over the words, pushing them out slowly and delicately so as not to offend. 
"Yes." The lump in your throat was thick, almost as if he'd put something there that you couldn't help but choke on. 
"Question three. Do you want to remain a virgin?" 
You shook your head no, following it with your voice seconds later as he stood up from his seat, putting some distance between you. 
"Question four. Do you feel intoxicated or drunk right now?" He held himself still as you sat on the very edge of your chair, desperate to feel his hands on you now. 
"No, I only had one sip at the bar before…" He held up a hand to silence you, and you did. 
Question five. Answer me honestly. Do you like it when I touch you?" 
"Yes." Your breath was a whisper, but it was breathy, sounding almost pornographic in your neediness. 
"Question six. Do you like it when other people touch you?" 
"Do you?" His head snapped back to yours, and you froze under his gaze. "Not as much." You answered and relaxed again, pouting slightly at his lack of answer. 
"Question seven. Do you like me touching other people?" He took a step closer to you again with this question, but you continued pouting as you shook your head. 
"No. I don't." His lips quirked upwards before he could stop them, but he gathered himself together again. 
"Question eight. Do you want me to leave?" You met his eyes at that question, taking one good, hard, long look at him. You noted the tensed jaw, the clenched fists, his stiff body language, trailing your eyes over him before looking him directly in the eyes. 
"No." You let the word hang on your tongue, pulling it out a bit longer than was necessary as you watched him take in a shaky breath. 
"Question nine. Do you want me to come over there and kiss you?" 
"God, yes." He was on you in seconds, restraints gone, throwing himself back at you as his lips collided with your own. Virgin you may be, but you'd kissed men before, and it had been nothing like this. 
His hands trailed up to your hair, tipping your head back slightly so he could gain better access. He bit your lip and thrust his tongue into your mouth when you gasped, so eager to consume every part of you whole. 
You'd never felt like this before. 
He pulled away, and you tried desperately to chase his lips, even as your lungs begged you to stop. 
"Last question," he whispered in the space between you, holding the sides of your face at a distance so neither of you could be tempted to dive in for a second kiss, or a third, or fourth. "Do you want me to fuck you?" You whimpered at his words, nodding furiously as you tried to lunge at him again, but he held you firm. 
"I need you to say your answer, baby. I need to hear your consent, okay?" You nod again and open your mouth, eyes never leaving his lips as you moan out a definitive "yes."
Instead of letting your lips fall against his again, he lunges for you, grabbing your legs and hauling you up into his arms, carrying you bridal style all the way back to your bedroom. 
"Gonna do it right," he mutters to himself as he throws you down on the bed, pulling back to take off his jacket and unbutton the cuffs on his shirt, rolling the sleeves up meticulously. 
"I'm going to take care of you, Y/N, okay?" You nod at him and flush, suddenly feeling the strength of his need for you as he holds himself back. He puts his hands on you again, gently coaxing your legs apart, pushing your skirt up over your hips. Reflexively, you move your hands over yourself, covering your sensitive places with your hands. 
"Don't cover yourself." His voice is strong, deep, as he orders you, and you let your arms drop back to your side. He traces his hands up and down your legs, almost as if he were memorising every inch of your skin, how you felt under his hands. 
His hands make their way up to your panties, and you watch with baited breath as he moves you, pulling your hips up so he can let them fall down. The lace material tickles you as he pushes them past your thighs, over your knees and finally off your legs entirely, balling them up and putting them in his pocket. 
"I'm going to touch you now, okay?" He asks it like a question, but he doesn't wait for your answer, unable to hold himself back before diving straight between your legs, so desperate to taste you that he's deaf to everything else. 
His tongue connects with your sensitive area first, tracing up and down at a steady pace as his legs half-heartedly push your legs open. It's almost as if he's enjoying the pressure of your legs wrapped around him, suffocating between your thighs as he feels your pleasure build, and build. 
Eventually he pushes your hips further apart, letting himself push his face into even more of you, his tongue entering your hole as he begins fucking it in and out of you, fingers coming back up to your clit to keep up the pressure there. 
"Spencer, please, please, fuck." 
"I love it when you beg for me like a needy little slut," he whispers, holding your legs apart as he looked up at you, face slick with your arousal. Your mouth drops wide at his words, and he immediately begins to retract them. 
"I'm sorry, Y/N, if that was too far, I just got caught up -" 
"I liked it." You said, quieting him as you spread your legs a bit further apart, begging for him to continue. He smiled and dived right back in, bringing his other hand up under your dress, all the way to your chest as you kept your legs open yourself. 
He sucked your clit into his mouth, lapping up all the juices you were releasing as you moaned underneath him, bucking into his face at the memory of his degradation. 
You were a needy little slut, and you needed him to make you cum. He was more than happy to oblige. 
He kept you there for what felt like forever, drinking you in for as long as he could. You orgasmed twice before he finished, completely overstimulated by the way he was desperately fucking you with his mouth. 
He was obsessed with you, with your scent, your taste, with being the first ever person to ever touch you like this, to fuck you, to make you feel so good. Without him even realising, you're pushed to the brink for a second time, shuddering under the heat of his mouth as he drinks you in. 
He finally pulls his head up again, coming up for air as you're twitching under him. 
"Perfect, baby, so perfect for me." His lips fall down to your own, and suddenly you're tasting yourself on his tongue. It's hypnotising, and despite the pleasure you've just received, you need more, desperate to feel him on you again. 
When he pulls his mouth away, he replaces himself with his fingers, pushing them into your mouth. 
"Suck," he says and you listen, as he watches the way you lick yourself off of him. 
He unzips your dress with his free hand, carefully pulling your arms out of the sleeves and pushing your dress off your body. You trace your tongue around every ridge of his fingers, leaving no inch undiscovered. He moved you to pull the dress of, and you graciously followed, letting him do whatever he wanted to you. 
"Nice little slut, tasting herself on my fingers?" He whispered when you were finally bare, pulling his fingers from your mouth, letting the trail of spit hang between you as you moaned. 
He removed himself from over you, and moved to sit on the edge of the bed. 
"Come here. Come and sit on my lap." 
You cautiously followed his directions. You'd thought that he'd fuck you then, after spending so long getting you ready, but apart from his tie, which he was in the middle of discarding as you crawled over to him, he hadn't derobed any further. 
"That's it baby, come and sit yourself down right here." He pat his thigh and you crawled over, lowering yourself down onto his clothed leg. 
"What now, Spencer?" You stuttered the words out, heart beating as you awaited his instructions. 
"Now, I want you to rock your hips back and forth. Just like this." He grabbed your hips and started moving you against his leg, pushing you down to grind into him. 
"Spencer, wait, I don't know-" 
"I do. I know you can do it, so please try. For me." You pulled you in for a kiss, and then removed his hands from you, leaving you to rock against his thigh. 
You were unsure of the movements at first, moving slowly as you dragged your aching cunt up and down the top of his pants, watching as you saw the wet patch you were making. You moaned with each movement, growing faster and more confident as you continued. 
"That's it baby, use me to get yourself off, okay? Let me see you." He whispered in your ears, pushing your sweat-slicked hair ou of your face, holding it up for you. 
"Spencer please," you don't even know what you're asking for as you beg him, feeling that familiar bubble in your stomach grow. 
"No, you can do it. You look so beautiful like this, Y/N, so desperate for my cock, huh?" You start trying to unbutton his shirt, desperate to see more of him, to feel more of his bare skin on your own. But he stops your hands and holds them against his chest. 
"You need to ask nicely first, before trying to undress me like a needy little whore." The words should sound violent, should humiliate you, but his voice is so soft you simply move faster, moaning and desperate to cum one more time. 
"Fuck, Spencer, I'm gonna… I'm gonna…" 
"No, you're not." Before you finish, he pulls you off his leg, hauling your body back onto the bed, and laying you back down on your back. You moan in disapproval, so frustrated with the lack of release that you feel tears prick the corners of your eyes. 
"Don't cry, baby. I'll give you what you want soon." He practically rips his clothes off, pulling his vest over his head, stumbling over each button and removing his belt and pants before climbing over to you. His cock finally free you take your first glance at it. 
You'd never entirely been sure how it was that the male appendage fit inside something as small as your pussy, and you were doubly unsure about how Spencer's was ever going to fit inside you. You stared at it wide eyed, as you took in the length, the girth, and the heat of it as he stroked it in one hands, pushing on top of you. 
He let go of it as soon as he was between your legs, letting it fall onto your stomach as he crawled between your legs. He trailed a finger over your lower abdomen just around where his cock was twitching against you as his other hand came up to stroke your hair. 
"You look worried, Y/N, what's wrong?" 
"Will it, um, will it fit?" You asked, knowing how cliché you sounded. 
"We've spent the last thirty-seven minutes loosening you up with foreplay. It should fit, but I can't promise it won't hurt."
"Right, if my hymen is still intact you have to…" 
"That's right. And then it's going to reach all the way in you to here," with each word, he stepped his fingers up from your clit to where the tip of his dick sat on your stomach, letting you come to terms with exactly how full you were about to be. 
"I'm going to fill you, and you're going to be mine, and I'm going to be yours. My sweet angel." He stroked your face, catching his thumb on your lips on the way down, tempted to thrust it into your mouth again, to see just how much of a whore you could be, given the chance. 
Instead, he lined himself up with your dripping core, and, making sure one last time that this is what you wanted, slowly pushed in. 
It was uncomfortable at first, having something so wholly alien inside of you, you weren't sure how to react. You wrapped your arms around him, digging your nails in, deep, as he pushed in further. 
"Y/N, I need to move more now, and it's going to hurt a little, you just have to trust me, okay?" He kissed the top of your head, but you were so lost in the sensations to answer. With one swift jerk of his hips, he pushed through your hymen, and fully sheathed himself inside of you. He pressed small kisses everywhere on your face, while whispering to you how beautiful you were. 
"You're doing so good for me angel, I'm going to take care of you. Going to make you feel so much better than this. You're so beautiful." His lips were distractingly sweet, as were his words, and soon you found yourself relaxing into him, the sharp pain of earlier fading to an electric buzz inside of you. 
You jerked your hips up to meet his, and with that, he knew you were ready. From his words, you'd assumed that he'd move slowly in you. But with one final lingering kiss to your lips, he lifted his chest up, pinned your legs tightly down, and started thrusting hard and fast. 
"Sorry, just couldn't help myself baby. Needed to see you looking ruined underneath me." Moans spilled out of your mouth with his every movement, and the orgasm you'd built up earlier hit you like a ton of bricks, blackness hazing over your eyes as they rolled back in your head. 
"Fuck, fuck, Spencer, don't stop!" You screamed at the top of your lungs, unable to control your pitch or volume as he slammed into you desperately. He was so turned on by the sight of you beneath him, so proud of having fucked away your virginity, to have given you your very first penetrative orgasm that he wouldn't have heard anything that came out of your mouth. 
His eyes were fixated at the place between you, where you joined, where he was entering you, defiling you, claiming you, using you, breeding you. 
He knew he wouldn't cum inside of you, not the first time, but it was tempting. Instead, he chose to move his lips back to your skin. He marked you with love bites and hickeys across your neck, chest and shoulders as you moaned with every roll of his hips, shuddering on his cock. He was close. And seeing you like this, displaying all the signs that you were his and his only, he finally lost it. 
Pulling his dick out of you, he stroked it through his release, spraying his seed over the parts of your skin he hadn't bruised with love. Your stomach, your breasts, hell, one spurt even landed dangerously close to your lips, he was everywhere. You. Were. His. 
He fell beside you, panting for a few moments as you finally cracked your eyes back open, realising what the two of you had just done. You wiped the cum from your face with a stray finger, staring at it for a second before licking it off your finger. 
"As hot as that was, I think we should get you cleaned up properly, angel." He spends forever cleaning you up, carrying you to the bathroom, washing your entire body with hot water and a fresh cloth, running you a hot bath to relax your muscles. You snuggle into his chest at some point in the bath, relaxing so much into him, that you drift off to sleep. 
You feel him carry you to bed, semi-conscious, tucking you in and climbing in next to you. He holds you through the night, the way he holds you after your bad cases. He holds you until he doesn't. 
You're blindsided by the cold bed the next morning. You knew he would be there, you'd felt him inside you and next to you, and you'd needed his warmth, but he was gone. You looked for him in every other part of your home, looked for a note or an explanation, but there wasn't one. 
Through tears, you got ready for work, ready to face him and make him answer why he was suddenly gone. You wanted him to apologise, especially since he'd marked you so badly the night before you looked like a car crash victim from the neck down. 
Dark lavender blossomed along your collar bones as you looked at yourself in the mirror, trailing a finger along every place that he touched the night before. 
"How could you be so stupid?" You cursed yourself. If you'd have listened to what he was saying last night, really listened, you'd have known he wasn't going to be here in the morning. He wanted to ruin you, to possess you, to take away your virginity, and he'd done just that. 
You almost wanted to keep the bruises on display going into work, to make him confront the pain he caused you by leaving. In the end, it was the inevitable stares from everyone else that convinced you otherwise. You wouldn't give him the satisfaction. 
You pushed through the doors to the bullpen and didn't bother putting your bag down before you started scanning the room for him. 
"Where's Spencer?" You practically shouted the words at Morgan, unable to hold back your anger. 
"Y/N, what's wrong?" 
"Where is he?" You demand, and there must be something in your eyes that speaks to your devastation because Morgan shuts up and just points to the top of the stairs, where Spencer is exiting Hotch's office without a care in the world. 
You don't realise that something is tears until you're beating a hand against his chest in frustration as they spill down your face. 
"Where were you?" You demand, sobbing into his chest, as he pulls your hands away. The entire office is watching your commotion, but you don't care, you're not letting him move you out of the way. 
"Y/N, I need you to sign this." His voice is calm, and you hate him for that. That he can stay so neutral when he's just broken your heart. 
"No, not until you tell me why you left." 
"Sign the papers, Y/N, trust me." He pulls your chin up so you can look him in the eye, and you catch a glimpse of the man who has been holding you, comforting you for the last four months. You snatch the pen from him and sign the papers, thrusting them back at him with a scowl. 
He smiles as he looks down at them, placing them back on his desk before pulling you in for a long, deep kiss. You're shocked at first, but you melt into it, pulling him closer so he can't leave again. 
"I'm sorry. I had to come into the office to declare our relationship, Morgan sometimes tells me I have a one track mind, and when I woke up this morning, the one thing I wanted to do was get it in writing that you were mine." 
Your push the tears out of his face, and attempt to pull him down for another kiss. You don't get the chance, as the sound of several throats clearing around you burst your bubble. 
"Public space, no canoodling." Rossi shouts down at you from the balcony, a soft smirk on his face. 
Penelope runs in from her office, and stares wide-eyed at the lack of space between the two of you. "You! And you! Security cameras….. You!"
"Now, I'm sure there's a story here, but from the state of our little angel's neck here, I'm sure I don't want to hear it." Derek laughs, smacking Spencer on the back in praise as he walks up the stairs to the meeting room. 
You slap a hand over your neck, trying to pull the turtleneck further up to hide the mark you evidently missed. 
"She's my angel, now." Spencer calls up to him. "I have the paperwork to prove it."  
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kajibunny · 5 months ago
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⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ we're just friends! (or are we?) w/ the wind breaker boys ✧⋆⭒˚。
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✿ featuring: hajime umemiya, jo togame, haruka sakura, hayato suo, ren kaji ✿ fluff, mutual pining, hidden feelings (aaaa), suggestive for suo, a lil angst (with comfort) for kaji ✿ a/n: i guess by now everyone can tell that i’m very into the friends to lovers trope ໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა~♡ it’s def my fav!!! and these wb bois are all perfect friend material, and ofc boyfriend material too! enjoy, cuties! ✿ wc: 2.3k
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— you have a closely intimate friendship to the point that everyone around you thinks you two are dating, though you know you're not lovers (yet), but are definitely more than just friends.
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ʚɞ umemiya 
— sharing hello and goodbye kisses with each other.
ꕤ you and umemiya are the definition of 'affectionate', as your love languages both consist of physical touch. but maybe with each other, a little bit too much for just friends.
ꕤ the word "boundaries" did not exist to the both of you once you were within arm's reach of each other. you and umemiya give each other hello and goodbye hugs, sometimes cheek and forehead kisses, as a greeting, right? to be friendly. though he doesn't seem to do that as often to other people, or at all, even. just to you. only to you. 
ꕤ he also loves cuddling up to you whenever he takes a nap on the rooftop, inviting you to join him in picking out some veggies that you two could make a meal together with.
ꕤ while you two were cooking together, you definitely gave off a 'married couple' vibe with the way you held the ladle up for umemiya to taste, the way he had pressed his palm to your back whenever he needed to pass through, the way he fed you with his own spoon and giggling while complimenting how delicious your cooking was, the way he wrapped his arms around you and hummed while he helped you wash the dishes. anyone who saw would have immediately bid their congratulations and would think you two are newlyweds.
ꕤ hiragi took one look at the both of you appearing all lovey-dovey, and the confusion of whether you two were dating or not made his stomach scrunch up in pain. 
ꕤ umemiya calls you such adorable names when referring to you in conversation, too. his tiny bean, his ray of sunshine, his cherry blossom, it was always "his", as if you belonged to him. he was openly affectionate with you and was not afraid to show it.
ꕤ many guys also took a liking to you, but never attempted to even make a move or confess, because they were already under the assumption that you were umemiya's, seeing you two playing with each other's fingers and comparing hand sizes like you were made for each other. but how could that be, you and umemiya were just friends, weren't you?
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ʚɞ suo 
— you get a special seat (on his lap).
ꕤ suo just can't seem to keep his eyes and his hands off of you. you always have to be within his vicinity, or he's not sure how he'll be able to stand it. 
ꕤ he sees you at the corner of his eye, after you have made your way back from the restroom. you and the other bofurin first years were at an izakaya, and the moment you returned, all of their eyes were glued to you and suo, as if they already knew something was going to ensue. you two have been friends for a long time, but the way you acted towards each other felt like you two have been lovers for a long time.
ꕤ suo was always up in your space, whether its pulling random pranks on you, inviting you to go out then paying for everything even though you tried to stop him (nothing can stop suo), visiting your home and leaving an endless supply of tea enough to last you a whole year - his excuse being it's there for whenever he comes over, and multiple instances which all prove that suo was no doubt a very clingy friend. not that you minded, anyway. you were used to suo and his antics.
ꕤ he had his ways of persuading you too (he is the master of negotiation, after all), and you just couldn't resist him, as you loved being around suo just as much. 
ꕤ this time, he took advantage of your short absence and made himself comfortable in your chair, and wouldn't even move an inch. "hayato, that's my seat!" you exclaimed. "hm?" suo tilts his head. "you can just sit on my lap, then." he smiles, with that damn mischievous smile you know all too well. you tried to get him to move by gently pushing him back and forth but suo seemed to not have a care in the world. 
ꕤ you can't tell whether suo is serious or joking sometimes, but nirei and sakura seems to have their doubts that you two are "just friends" as you both claim.  "are you sure the two of you aren't dating?" nirei asks you. sakura blushes and lets you know his thoughts, too. "y-yeah...! you two are unusually close!" you always reply to them with an astounding "no!" but suo just laughs and does not affirm nor deny any of their claims. 
ꕤ suo pulls you in close, making you sit on his lap regardless of your little outburst, and you weren't sure if it was hot in the izakaya, or if it's just you, but you certainly felt warmth overcome your body while it was pressed flush against his, his arms wrapped around your waist nonchalantly. "hayato!" you protested, trying to squirm your way out of his grasp, and pushing away all intrusive thoughts about his and your bottom halves being so close together, only separated by thin pieces of clothing.
ꕤ nirei, the most observant of the bunch (next to suo), points out that you even call suo by his first name, and that's another one of the reasons why you two seem like you're dating. 
ꕤ with suo, everything seems to be a mystery. but in suo's perspective, it's all clear. he loves you, whether it's as a friend or as a lover, that's for him to know and for you to find out. 
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ʚɞ togame 
— leaves everyone on read except you.
ꕤ togame just doesn't understand why people need to type out what they want to say, aren't calls more personalized? he didn't understand at all, until he met you.
ꕤ you were, to put it directly, a chatterbox in all forms. you loved to talk, regardless if it's chats, calls, or in person, you just yapped your heart out to him everytime, and he lives for it. he wouldn't miss a second of you opening your mouth and giving him a taste of your innermost thoughts. he absolutely adored talking to you, because it was you, and you were special to him.
ꕤ the shishitoren guys thought it was so funny and adorable whenever togame picks up his phone so quickly because he thought it was you calling, then scowls when he realizes it isn't, and immediately silences it and shoves it back in his pocket. this caused him to set a different ringtone just for you, so he could pick up on the very first ring.
ꕤ you were also the first reply he ever sent via sms, a simple "ok" to your long message talking about how you thought it was amazing that he won the town's annual eating contest for many consecutive years in a row and that you were totally ready to challenge him next year by stuffing your face with okonomiyaki and invited togame to join you and have some with you so you could keep an eye on the competition. he found your personality totally amusing, his face immediately lighting up with a gentle smile whenever you sent him messages.
ꕤ anyone who sees how happy he is while he rereads your texts over and over would interpret that as togame being totally, irrevocably, head over heels in love with you.
ꕤ he doesn't actually reply to anyone at all ever, but he wanted to share all his firsts with you, he just couldn't help it. you were captivating, witty in your words, and very very charismatic, bombarding him with the cutest and funniest messages everyday. of course, he doesn't mind at all and is always looking forward to them.
ꕤ you two stay on calls for longer than eight hours at a time talking about how each other's day went, and yet you wonder why people always think you two are dating. normal friends don't stay up until the break of dawn chattering for hours on end, expressing all the things they like about each other, do they? at least togame knows he wouldn't do it with anyone that wasn't you, as he valued his precious sleep time dearly, but as time went on, you became more precious and more dear to him than his sleep time ever could.
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ʚɞ kaji 
— play fighting like an old married couple.
ꕤ kaji is the type to never go down without a fight. needless to say, that also applies to you. but your fights with him were different, more banter adjacent, more affectionate and playful. only lasting for a few minutes.
ꕤ kaji had a huge soft spot for you, as even though you did irritate the heck out of him sometimes, somehow he still could not stay angry or annoyed at you for more than one second. he just couldn't resist the way you crossed your arms and huffed with your cute little frown. he thought you were the most adorable angry little thing he's ever seen and wanted to pinch your cheeks out of cuteness aggression and frustration, but he would never say it to your face.
ꕤ one time, you two had a heated argument because he said he could hear you just fine but wouldn't bother to take off his headphones. you argued that it was impolite and that you won't talk to him at all anymore if he does that again, and you two were at each other's throats, giving one another a piece of your mind, until kaji mutters a 'sorry', and you began to sob uncontrollably and let him hold you in his arms while he stroked your hair to comfort you because you two couldn't stand the intensity and tension of being angry at each other for long.
ꕤ you had your less serious fights too, like when you made him a bento box for lunch and you two had a picnic together with his vice captains. you fed him the food with your chopsticks, kaji teasing you by saying "it's bland." and you reasoning out that kaji was 'as salty as his tastebuds'. kaji then asked you if you wanted to have 'a taste of his fists', which ended up with kusumi and enomoto snickering in the background wishing that the both of you would just date each other already.
ꕤ whenever you two argued, your faces were so close to one another's that you were just a few centimeters shy from kissing, the tip of your noses touching. kaji had to hold himself back, a lot. like an insane amount. friends didn't want to kiss and make out with their friends, right? but kaji did. and you did too.
ꕤ his way of apologizing is by suddenly leaving a lollipop with you. he puts them in your bag, or places them in your pocket while you weren't looking. it was his little peace offering, one that you treasured and collected, accumulating dozens of them by your bedside table. kaji would gladly give up his last lollipop for you, and no one could argue otherwise.
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ʚɞ sakura 
— blushing wildly whenever you two are around each other.
ꕤ you and sakura always looked like you two were having a blushing competition. the littlest touches and the most minimal contact had both of your cheeks heating up in response.
ꕤ it was like sakura's blushing was contagious. ever since you two became good friends (if you could call it that, though it seemed to be more than that at times), being around him triggered a whole bunch of embarrassing and hilarious but sweet situations.
ꕤ you once dragged sakura off to his very first cherry blossom viewing in the park, and needless to say, with both of you being a chaotic (but cute) duo, it kind of felt like you were on a wild rollercoaster ride with him. 
ꕤ you took a stolen photo of sakura while he was mesmerized by the falling pink petals. you thought he looked adorable, but sakura thought otherwise. he was a blushing mess and told you to delete them, but you said they were cute and that you were going to make it your wallpaper. 
ꕤ sakura chased after you, and tripped over a stray cherry blossom branch, leaving you two in quite a suggestive position, sakura on top of you, pinning your wrist down with his hand. your cheeks were as pink as the cherry blossoms, and tried as you might, you couldn't keep your eyes off his lips. friends don't observe their friends with wanting eyes, do they? 
ꕤ suo and nirei instantly noticed how huge of a klutz you were around sakura. they also noticed how curious sakura was about you, always (not so subtly) asking nirei how much he knew about you, or your likes and dislikes, then asked him not to tell you that he asked about you. but suo told you instead, because they were your biggest supporters and cheerleaders (and biggest shippers, of course) after all. 
ꕤ on sakura's birthday, they made you hold the cake and surprise him, which was a huge mistake, because before it could even reach him, you slipped and fell over him. luckily, sakura had good reflexes and was able to catch you before you completely toppled over. some of the smushed cake ended up on his and your face, which you tried to wipe off as you apologized, but sakura dipped his finger onto the icing that got on your cheek and licked his finger. "t-the cake's not bad, i guess..." he looked away from your smiling face as you greeted him happy birthday in a sing-song tune.
ꕤ suo, being a menace, greeted sakura happy birthday as well as gave him a 'best wishes to the happy couple' greeting card, that sakura threw back at him like it had a virus on it. 
ꕤ sakura definitely had a memorable birthday that year, but now that he thought about it, all of his memories that were memorable to him had one thing in common: you were in all of them. you, the greatest gift he could ever ask for on any and every occasion. 
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