#and kaveh just has to get over his insecurities and understand alhaitham's love language or whatever

[brainrot-jikan]

im not the biggest alhaitham/kaveh shipper (because im a rare pair ho) but it seems to me that in alhaitham/kaveh getting-together fics tend to be... unequal.

the beautiful thing about alhaitham and kaveh is that they're both equally right and equally wrong and equally dicks about it. but the writers for alhaitham/kaveh much more frequently seem to give alhaitham the burden change (the burden of the character flaw) instead of kaveh.

in any good character arc, the main character has a fatal flaw or misconception, and by the end of that arc they have addressed that flaw in some definitive way. scrooge was a scrooge and learned that being that way was detrimental; merlin from finding nemo was overprotective to a fault and had to learn that he couldn't (and shouldn't) control everything and to let go; the wolf from little red riding hood learns that you should stop while you're ahead.

stories centering around romance tend to lean heavily on character arcs, which makes sense. and since romance generally requires two individuals to be vulnerable and open and emotional with each other, it makes double sense that alhaitham/kaveh authors zoom straight into alhaitham's lack of emotional vulnerability.

this bothers me.

in society, individuals are expected to experience and present emotions in a specific way. if someone dies, you cry. if someone smiles at you, you smile back. if you're at a party, you're supposed to be having fun. if you don't do these things, you're seen as impolite at best and a inhuman freak at worst. when these behaviors are frequent it's often viewed as emotional immaturity, or a lack of ability to feel at all. the inability or lack of willingness to conform to societies emotional expectations of you is seen as a flaw and a reason for exclusion.

alhaitham is canonically disliked and avoided for being the way he is. he prefers it this way, but that doesn't mean the people perpetuating this avoidance are in the right. they are the societal pressure to conform that alhaitham blows off. alhaitham could be the way he is for a lot of reasons: avoidant attachment style, trauma, following someone else's example (eg. his grandmother), or just his base personality. it doesn't MATTER. he is the way he is. kaveh having to accept that should be part of the story.

putting the burden of the fatal flaw on alhaitham, making the way alhaitham treats kaveh and the people around him the problem, feels invalidating. it implies heavily that alhaitham's way of interfacing with the world, alhaitham's very SELF, is incorrect. my suggestion is to flip a larger portion of that burden onto kaveh. kaveh 👏 character 👏 arcs 👏

some examples/recommendations:

- make kaveh project his insecurities onto other people but especially onto alhaitham; he's overly reliant on other people for his own self worth, and he perceives alhaitham's lack of positive feedback as a direct reflection of how alhaitham feels about him. but learns along the way that alhaitham doesn't hate him, kaveh's actual struggle is with hating himself and being unable to his own self as worthy of love. maybe throw in how you are responsible for your own recovery, other people can help but you can't rely on them to carry you through self actualization.

- or, kaveh tries to make alhaitham behave more like a "normal" person, to be more pleasant and emotive and forthcoming, and then realizes he's in the wrong for trying to make alhaitham into something he's not, possibly for all the wrong reasons (not because he likes alhaitham better like that, but bc society says that's healthier and a better/more conforming way to be)

- or you could go ahead make alhaitham's issues the main problem but they're too complicated to overcome in a short period of time, so kaveh has to accept alhaitham is doing his best in his own way and not push for unrealistic and unhealthy changes. he could alter his own behavior to give alhaitham space and time and a safe place to land.

that got sappy so it's past time for me to dip out. go forth and ship things; but maybe consider letting alhaitham be a rude stone-faced bastard if he wants to be.

[thatdeadaquarius]

Have some more language brainrot for your brainrot

Writer reader getting kind of insecure that even if they write something nobody will understand it, so when Al haithem askes you if he can keep a draft or two just for analyzing, there's hesitant agreement but ultimately you tell him to please burn the documents once he's done. They're too awkward to look at now...

Only he doesn't burn them, in fact he ends up recruiting several people close to the creator with knowledge of olden speak to analyze them. A funeral parlor consultant well known for his historical knowledge, a 500 year old shrine maiden who owns and runs her own publishing house, and a bard who somehow butted his way in on the project. None of them could resist the opportunity to witness the creator's sacred scriptures with their own eyes.

Needless to say, the papers ended up being fought over and have been making their rounds around your acolytes. It started with Ei, who insisted that as an archon she also should see the creator's work with her own eyes. Then once Ningguang found out, she ordered they be handed over to a team of literary analysts in order to be properly handled and deciphered. Things got really messy quick, but have luckily come to a halt as none of the acolytes want the creator to know their random writings are being fought over.

Especially when it comes to the creator's sullen additute. Their acolytes first have to convince their holiness that their inability to read and understand the creator's writing shouldn't prevent you from doing what you love. In fact... could they convince you to write some more?

WRITER OR READER WITH TALENTS HAS MY WHOLE HEART LIKE-

On one hand, same 💀 id be terrified for my all time fav skrunklies to see my bs

But at the same time i rlly wanna show them goddamit- THANK U FOR THE BRAIN FOOD IM RUNNING LAPS AROUND MY HOUSE THINKING ABT THIS-

Sun: Gender Neutral Reader (they/them), Writer!Reader

Planet: Language Shenanigans

Orbit: Scenario

Stars: Alhaitham mostly, some of Kaveh, mentions of other Sumeru characters

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: Insecure about craft/writing, anxious first pov (not serious),

& Trigger Warnings: Mild Negative self-talk, insecure perspective/reader “you”, possible anxiety depiction.

You were not a very confident writer.

This had been an avoidable feeling ever since you picked up a pen for the first time and were asked to write a story for school.

You were always anxious turning in essays, letting friends proofread them, anything that would expose your writing to more eyes, because you’d learned the hard way early on that as you get older and better at something, the stuff from the beginning… starts to look a lot different than you remember.

things you used to be proud of after having completed them in the moment, were something you struggled not to rip to shreds a year or two after you re-found it.

If it weren’t for other writers advising holding onto old work so you can see your progress over time, you’d have probably literally nothing older than one year on your ao3, wattpad, etc…

So when you had the fortunate luck (no it is not unfortunately, you are very happy to be here tbh) to fall headfirst into your video game you’ve been obsessed with lately,

You were not planning on showing them any of your writing.

Why would you, after all? You’ve got the weapons, the artifacts, everything they need to be more powerful. Why would you show them a silly little story you wrote? Fanfic or otherwise, not that theyll recognize any characters besides themselves, but still.

Alhaitham, bc ofc it was alhaitham, cocky, deviously aware bastard he is, caught you writing in your spare time first.

You’d gotten your hands on an old journal (if made you feel better than something completely new, a nice worn leather journal, sold at a secondhand shop from an old adventurer) and had started to write what you could remember about some of your ideas you’d had drafts for in your old world

After initially walking in on you writing in the House of Daena (it was the closest you could get to lofi girl, god u missed her lmao), you nearly jumped a foot in the air bc Haitham’s a nosy bitch and leaned over your shoulder and scared the absolute shit out of you, mans goes from asking politely, to begging you to let him read some of your writing over the course of 3 weeks (a month really)

Finally, after this 6 ft (about 180cm) man leans down one day (you’re sitting writing again), and gives you the most insanely good?? puppy dog eyes??? you’ve ever seen on a man???

you give in, revise a draft about 5 times in a row, lose sleep bc ur having a breakdown about alhaitham judging ur writing the night before you give him his copy-

and hand over a small short story for him to read. you specifically leave a little note not to judge you so hard for Haitham bc u werent used to people reading ur work/let alone someone as highly academic as him, ESPECIALLY since your speech is already so much more archaic than his/all of Teyvats-

His stupid green eyes with diamonds look into your soul (are they sparkling??) and he braces your shoulders after you give him his copy,

“Mine Greatest Guide, you hath deemed this one worthy of thy trust of your creations personally, I would be a fool to gaze upon it in jest. To take this work as anything less than a masterpiece in its infant stages.”

…you just leave him to it, and are nearly running out of there (u managed to be calm enough to just speedwalk),

and you make a point to not ask what he thought about it, or even bring it up at all

you’re kind of hoping he forgot tbh… and so nothing happens!

◇

Nothing happens… for 2 weeks after you gave Haitham a copy of your short story.

You still don’t know Alhaitham’s opinion when you see the advertisement, a sign saying something about, a new book? By YOU???

You nearly start a mob because the shopkeeper insisted you sign some copies, but you only signed a few before too many people overwhelmed you, and seeing it was that same draft- !! Oh god, you’d been agonizing over the spelling errors you’d missed when you gave it to Alhaitham, and now it’s just out there???

(luckily it seems the reviews are positive, but dammit you’ve been rereading ur story u gave him for days, and now ur positive it’s shit-)

You make a break for it, and are literally running (more like speed-walking after a while, since u got further away) thru Sumeru City:

you pass by the open patio of a restaurant, the scholars are heatedly discussing ur characterization-

you pass by Dehya, Candace, and Dunyazard, the merc is waving around a copy of ur book, the other two women look excited abt the conversation-

oh my god-

Nahida is relaxing in one of the many little gazebos thruout Sumeru, while Wanderer seems to be reading your story to her-

You fucking track down Alhaitham’s house like a bloodhound.

You are banging the infamous gay roommates’ front door, panting til ur throat burns raw.

“Yes, yes, alright, greetings to you too! I was simply visiting the Acting Grand Sage Alhaitham, tis why I’m here- Greatest Lord?!”

Kaveh is nearly jumps a foot in the air at the sight of you, but recovers, (you’re still not tho lmao)

and invites you in bc apparently, Alhaitham’s been meaning to talk to you about your draft you gave him!

Oh yeah, you’ve got some words to give Haitham after giving him that damn draft privately-

But when he sees you, the fucker just- smiles??

Like he’s done nothing wrong???

You’re about to tear into him when he speaks first to tell you the good news!

He grabs your hands at the table and gets down on one knee, ohhhh no.

Alhaitham is giving you those damn begging puppy dog eyes again.

“My Greatest Lord, Giver of Power, and Guide to All, your exquisite story has entranced all of Teyvat, might I please insist you write a sequel? It is an excellent literary piece to analyze… or perhaps, even better, share other stories you’ve written??”

…

….Motherfucker.

☆

Hello I’m alive! I just took a longer-than-usual break between posts from those last 2 mammoth pieces about gifts,

1: bc they were a lot to write in between writing other stuff like fanfics im already working on lol 2: I got busy with holidays and trying to apply to jobs!

Not that I’m still not doing that.. but you get what I mean!

Safe Travels Anon,

That being said, as you’ve probably noticed, I’ve made a kofi! so if you ever liked my writing (hot mess it is) and want to show me some love, feel free to leave a tip! :]

Iced coffee?? :0

💀♒

☆

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche

[cveasie]

My haikaveh headcanons:

- Haitham falls first, during the academia years, but he just kinda... accepts it? He's not the type to voice his feelings, he'd rather show them through his actions - even if they aren't clear enough for the other person to understand. He doesn't need Kaveh to know. He just needs Kaveh to... feel appreciated, in any way. For him, love is another language to master; not only for the sake of Kaveh, but also for his own. He cherishes the feeling and never denies it.

- Kaveh on the other hand, falls harder. I'd like to imagine that it happens some time after he'd moved in with Haitham. Somehow, through this sense of normalcy, domesticy, he starts to dig deeper into Haitham's actions. More importantly, gradually, he starts to notice: he starts to notice how his heart clenches in this burning feeling of appreciation, of belonging. It just feels right - Haitham feels right - they, together, feel right. And, oh, he loves him, and he has for some time now. His love for Haitham feels right as well.

- While Haitham knows Kaveh like the back of his own hand, he doesn't even consider that his feelings are mutual. Kaveh has always been focused on the academics, driven, passionate – romantic relationships didn't concern him during their academia days. While a romantic at heart, reality just often... fell flat, and Kaveh didn't mind it whatsoever. So, Alhaitham has never seen Kaveh crushing on someone. Of course, he notices the architect's sudden nervousness around him – Kaveh tends to bite his lips when anxious. Of course Haitham sees the way Kaveh starts to spend more time on his hair and make up. How could he not? How could he not, when his braids look more perfect than ever (though the scribe finds Kaveh's messy hair equally beautiful – the sign of his hard work, of his passion), when the jewelry matches the blouse perfectly, every day. Mere noticing however, doesn't equal with knowing. And Alhaitham hates the feeling of uncertainty, this weird, almost uncharacteristic anxiety for him. Something has changed. Why? What has caused Kaveh to feel such devotion, that even his dark circles have almost disappeared under a neat layer of concealer? So, he starts to pry. Subtly. He takes an extra minute to get ready, just so he can talk to Kaveh a little more, hoping for any kind of information. In the evenings, he starts to sit unusually close to the architect, watching him sketch – maybe its a new project? A new client? Why wouldn't Kaveh tell him? To his absolute misery however, the architect only seems to draw further and further away. He starts to stumble on his words, starts leaving for work earlier, as if embarrassed, as if he couldn't even look at Alhaitham. That's when it strikes Haitham – maybe he is the one making Kaveh uncomfortable?

- It starts with a question:

"Am I making you uncomfortable?" Asks Haitham one day, during a seemingly peaceful evening. Kaveh's cheeks are dusty pink, and he's smiling to himself. With the question, his expression changes almost completey.

"Is my junior suddenly insecure? It's so unlike you to ask about such things..."

There is a hint of teasing in the architect's voice, but even that cannot hide a clear nervousness in his behavior. There is a sudden tension in the room, and Alhaitham also starts to feel anxious.

"Well... you've been acting strange, that's all. After observing you for quite a while, I've come to the conclusion that the problem must be in my presence – it's the only logical option".

Then, Kaveh's lips are on his. Things happen so quick, he doesn't even have time to respond, to kiss him back, when the architect is looking at him with teary eyes and a hand over his mouth. He looks terrified, ashamed, suddenly so small, despite his usual confident face. All of this takes Haitham a bit too long, because Kaveh is suddenly standing up.

"I'm... sorry, I didn't mean to. I didn't think, I just acted, I..." he doesn't get to finish, when his hand is grabbed in a gentle grip, and he's lead to sit on the couch once again.

Then, they talk. For this whole time, Haitham doesn't let go of Kaveh's hand, looking at him with gentle eyes, full of disbelief. He doesn't even notice the tears on his own cheeks until Kaveh makes a snarky remark about it. After two hours of talking, he kisses Kaveh back. After few years of waiting, he kisses Kaveh back. And to Kaveh, this feels right.

[liminalpsych-in-teyvat]

Genshin character feelings

First off, when I start thinking about Genshin characters, I find myself saying "aaa I love this character" about almost all of them. Which is a rarity for me! I tried making a "favorite characters" list and it was too long, so I'm going to divide it up into categories instead.

Characters I resonate with

Either I relate to these characters personally, or they're characters I'd absolutely play in a live action roleplaying game because they fit the archetypes I like to play.

Alhaitham: His pursuit of knowledge and seeking deeper understanding of the world, his affinity for language, his sharp read of people, and how others find him hard to read.

Kamisato Ayato: Parentified, observant, introverted, masks his feelings heavily.

Baizhu: Intellectually-oriented healer with a hunger for knowledge, understanding, and ambitious goals. Also the healing transference trope is one of my favorites. And with snake associations!

Nahida: Existential psychology Gestalt therapist! And a really balanced focus on knowledge, compassion, and seeking to understand others.

Xiao: I just really like roleplaying a tortured soul who's in a service role. Less that I resonate with Xiao personally and more that he's an archetype I enjoy roleplaying.

Kaveh, in an uncomfortable way: A lot of Kaveh's behaviors and tendencies are ones that I've spent many years training myself out of and working to heal from. So I relate to Kaveh, I remember being a lot like Kaveh, and also I know how harmful some of those deeply insecure behaviors can be, and how unhealthy the rescuer/over-empathic bits can be.

Characters I'd want to be friends with

Yoimiya: She's just so wholesome, without being naive. The most healthy positivity I've ever seen, someone who looks at the darkness and says "well, that'll let the fireworks burn brighter and more colorfully". Most well-adjusted person in the entire game. I adore her.

Nahida: We could have so many good conversations on humanity, psychology, sociology, existence, meaning-making…!

Zhongli: The sort of person I already hang out with a lot. Let's go experience cultural things and talk about history and context.

Thoma: Compassionate, caring, adventurous, interpersonal, relationally perceptive. Thoma just seems like a really good friend in general.

Kuki Shinobu: A whole ADHD mood. I too like to collect skills and hobbies to have something interesting to do. And she's pragmatic, and doesn't just do things because other people want her to, and still watches out for the people she cares about.

Sanganomiya Kokomi: Spoonie friend! But also lots of intellectual discussion options.

Favorite characters to play in game

Arataki Itto: His play style is fun, and his voice lines never get old. First character I triple-crowned.

Kamisato Ayato: I love his play style and his voice lines. He's such a delightful asshole.

Zhongli: Hooray for pillars and endless shields!

Cyno: Dynamic interesting playstyle, very engaging and fast.

Ningguang: Dynamic playstyle, and helpful to have when running around the overworld.

Characters I love to watch

They might be terrible people, they might be someone I'd never want to spend time with, they might be someone I'd find difficult or annoying to interact with in real life… but they're so much fun to watch.

All of the Harbingers

Venti, Yae Miko, Yelan, Arataki Itto, Klee, Lyney, Tighnari, Kamisato Ayato

Characters who are an entire gender

Unrealistic transition goals, really.

Baizhu: The moment I saw Baizhu, I went "…I must know who this is, I want his entire aesthetic". The best compliment I ever received was when my metamour (my girlfriend's partner) was playing Genshin, not knowing my reaction to this character. They got to the part where you first meet Baizhu in game and paused, calling my girlfriend over before they even talked to Baizhu, saying "Look! It's liminalpsych!"

Arlecchino: She gets called Father, she has an incredible visual kei style, she's so dapper and androgynous and poised and clawed and

Alhaitham, Kamisato Ayato, Kaeya, Kaveh, Xiao, Neuvillette: Style, clothing, and presence, basically.