#and it's hilarious how you can see that jesse's stage presence has not changed like at all

[crmsndragonwngss]

By Blood and Iron

(2007 - 2010)

Alright guys, as some of you may or may not know, By Blood and Iron does not play shows anymore. We all agreed back in the summer of 2009 to chill out and do our own things for awhile. We were all too busy to carry on with this band right now. Whether we do anything again in the future is undecided, i guess we'll just have to wait around and see how things play out.

As for our music, you can download it here 

If we haven't been responding to your messages and comments, we apologize, it is because none of us hardly check this myspace anymore. If you want to hear new music from us, then you can check out me and Alex's new band, Erra. Also Chop's band Only In Somnolence. You can find us on the top friends of this page.

(via last.fm, from MySpace)

Demo 08:

Demo 09:

Thanks again, anon, for bringing this to my attention!

[darlingpetao3]

Thank You For Ruining My Life: An Homage to Tom Cavanagh

“You’ve ruined all my future expectations of men.”

The costume-clad woman had the courage of steel to say this to the then 53-year-old actor, Tom Cavanagh of The Flash, in front of a ballroom filled with a couple hundred people. This brave utterance was spoken during the 2016 Fan Expo Vancouver convention during a Flash question and answer period with actors Tom Cavanagh and Candice Patton. In its third season, the show was undoubtedly still hitting its stride in popularity, and the room was packed to hear these two speak.

The brave woman whose turn it was at the microphone was referring to Tom’s role as Ed Stevens on the NBC 2000 hit, Ed. I had not known of this show previously, but having now heard such a proclamation intrigued me. “You’ve ruined all my future expectations of men.” That was a tempting notion, and as I continued to listen to this disarmingly charming and wittingly funny man steal the stage, Tom intrigued me even more. I’d watched him play three different versions of Harrison Wells on The Flash since the show’s premiere date, yet I hadn’t truly noticed him in a “life-ruining” way before.

Little did I know that Tom Cavanagh would not only eventually ruin my expectations for men as well, but he would change my life in other ways, too.

After the Q&A, I had this urge to buy a S.T.A.R. Labs T-shirt from one of the vendors at the convention. In my head, I thought I would purchase something so that I could have an excuse to talk to Mr. Cavanagh at his signing booth. Again, he intrigued me, and I wanted to experience more of his incredibly likeable personality. So, I dragged my friend with me to wait for what was maybe ten minutes in a queue. Shortly, I was paying the assistant for my autograph I would soon acquire. They wrote my name on a sticky note so that Tom would know how to sign a personalized message to me. And then, it was my turn.

His eyes sparkled when he turned his attention to me. I instantly had a feeling this was just the way he was naturally. Oh yeah, and I swear to God I’d never seen eyes that blue in my entire life. It genuinely stunned me.

“Hi!” he greeted me.

“Hi!” I responded, equally as thrilled. Tom admired the T-shirt I had brought and took note of my name on the piece of paper. I remember us joking together about the extremely lax security in and around S.T.A.R. Labs on the show, which prompted his message to me on the heather-grey cotton. He wrote my name, [followed by a heart!] and a very welcoming, ‘Come on by, just walk right in!’

I had official clearance from Harrison Wells himself.

I thanked him very much, leaving with my treasure folded over my arms. My friend and I walked towards the hall’s exit, and I couldn’t shake this feeling inside me. It felt strange—I couldn’t name it for the life of me. It felt like an odd fluttering with a simultaneous yet contradictory slightness of breath. My head was confused and would continue to be so for the rest of that weekend.

As I waited at my gate in the airport on that Sunday evening to head home, all I knew was that the moments at the con featuring Tom were the highlights of the weekend for me.

And that I was going to begin watching more of the other films and television shows he’d been in. What was the show the brave cosplaying woman had said ruined her expectations of men? Oh yeah, Ed.

Maybe I’ll start there…

***

Feliz Navidad, Feliz Navidad…

In my house, it’s never really Christmastime until Michael Bublé croons through the speakers of the wooden stereo system in the living room. It felt especially festive as it was now Christmas Eve���a month and some change since the con. It was late, possibly ten o’clock. I was lying on the floor in front of the Christmas tree with my trusty laptop, a word document open. I was writing three holiday-song short stories featuring the new muse in my life, Harrison Wells. I wanted to be able to post them the next day, so my fingers were taptaptapping away.

I had written a handful of things before 2017, most of which had been Marvel-related, under my second, ‘rebirth’ pen name online. I was a little fish among all the grand and fabulous writers on Archive of Our Own, and in many ways, I still feel like that little fish. I was only just learning and feeling out the psyche of the Wells characters. Each one is so different. In my rewatch of the previous seasons of The Flash, I’d taken diligent notes, and as I’d later learn with each following rewatch, I would know them all—what they think, how they talk and behave—like the back of my hand. It was fun to suss out these guys, and I found that I was growing to love the act of writing even more.

One month later, in January, I would post all the stories I’d written thus far on Tumblr. I’d just created an account and, who knows? Maybe I’d get a wider range of readers on here, too.

Might as well give it a shot, right?

***

Wild horses couldn’t keep me from attending Fan Expo Vancouver 2017, especially when the big news dropped. Not only would Tom Cavanagh be attending again, but so would Carlos Valdes, Danielle Panabaker, Candice Patton, and the convention-elusive star of the show himself, Grant Gustin.

Before the moderator for the Flash cast’s Q&A panel could utter the final thanks to the actors at the end of the session, I bounded from my seat and sped down to the photo op booth where the cast would be taking “Team Up” photos with fans. ‘Sped down’ has to be the most appropriate couple of words because I indeed felt like a true Speedster dressed head to toe as the small screen’s adaptation of Jesse Quick, the angsty and brilliant daughter to Harrison Wells turned superhero.

After waiting in a queue that felt like ages, I was next to stand with Team Flash. As I took a step forward, all of the actors’ and actresses’ eyes—the people I spend time with every Tuesday evening—were on me. I heard a familiar voice approve of my costume. It was Danielle.

“Tremendous.”

Grant even joked that he thought for a second Violett Beane, the actress who plays Jesse Quick, had shown up to surprise them. “I was like, what’s Violett doing here?” he said.

I stood in the back row, happily sandwiched between Tom and Carlos. I dared to let my hands rest on their backs, and I couldn’t contain my joy. Shortly after, when I received my near-instant physical photograph of the moment, I saw Tom had pointed at me. In my mind, it felt as if in his gesture, he meant, hey, look at this cool person. Haha. I couldn’t be further from it.

I would go on to further be uncool in public as I later found myself virtually shaking and almost hyperventilating in line for a one-on-one photo op with Tom. The guy dressed as Kid Flash behind me gave me a few encouragements of the “it’ll be okay” variety. As my turn finally arrived, the lovely man of the hour greeted me with a bright smile in recognition of my Reverse Flash T-shirt (I had done a quick change before this photo op because I had worn a Flash T-shirt for a photo with Grant).

“Great shirt!”

The internet comes up with many hilarious and fitting words, but none such so than the term “Cavanarms.” One of the said Cavanarms found its way around my shoulder in such a casual way. My hand rested on his back, and I have told anyone who will listen about how soft his sweater was. What was approximately a five-second interaction will stay with me forever. And to this day, I will always regret how I’m standing beside him in the picture—there’s a distinguishable gap between us. I could have been closer—should have been!—but I like to use the fact that I felt as if I’d combust into flames if I were any closer to the man.

Maybe I’d have another chance to combust later again that day because, believe it or not, this fan hadn’t had enough of seeing Mr. Cavanagh in person. And since he was appearing at the con for this day only, there was no way I was going to squander any opportunities. Besides, there was still one final thing left on my convention docket: the autograph. In my mind, going to get his autograph was an excuse to get to talk to him and simply be in his presence for longer than five seconds. Here, take my money. I’m a sucker, and I’m proud of it. I saved all year for this kind of thing, and Fan Expo has always been my ultimate nerdy Treat Yoself Day.

Plus, this year I came equipped with a question for Tom (something for which I may have prepared a little too far in advance).

“Which of your characters would win in a lawyering battle: Ed or Miles?”

Miles was Tom’s latest character from his newly released project Darrow & Darrow, a fellow lawyer as Ed Stevens (remember, the man who ruins women’s expectations of men?), whom he portrayed almost two decades prior. What I loved about Tom when I got to ask him this was that he was silent for a moment following the question. He was genuinely putting thought into my question. As he pondered, Tom continued to autograph the photo of us together taken mere hours ago.

“Ed. He would wipe the floor with that other guy. Like, Miles is great, but Ed has a rapier-sharp mind, you know?”

I wholeheartedly agreed with his answer and felt relieved inside for some reason. We thanked each other (as politely as two Canadians can) before I left him to pay attention to the next lucky soul in line. I made the mistake of casting my eyes downward at the signed photo.

Tom had signed two little hearts over the I’s in my name. He really needed to stop adding hearts to my things, or I was just going to melt to the floor. In fact, I started to make these strange noises as I tried not to completely maul everyone in front of me while exiting. My friend ushered me as fast as physically possible on our way out of the main hall. One man took one look at me and asked, “Are you okay?”

No.

“Yep!”

The second I made it out of the herd, I broke out into open space. First came the minor hyperventilating. Then came the squealing followed by laughter. Top it off with various fangirlish comments of, “He’s so beautiful!”, “His eyes are so blue!” and “I love him!” and I was probably quite the sight to see (but at a convention, that’s considered normal!). My friend smiled on as she let me express everything that I had to keep inside until I had the right time to expel my emotions. I was on cloud nine. Ten, if at all possible.

The next day would be the con’s final day, which I would attend alone. My friend needed to catch the ferry in order to prepare for her courses the day after. I did a scan of the convention hall one final time in case there was something I missed purchasing. Afterwards, I sat on the cold hard flooring of the convention centre hallway for a bit of a break. I was wiped out. With my phone in hand, I smiled at the messages from this one Tumblr blogger who had been following my posted adventures at the con. I had seen and replied to many of her comments on my stories I’d written thus far, and I enjoyed her matching enthusiasm for Tom and The Flash in general. I felt her to be a kindred spirit. I had no idea then that I was chatting with one of my future best friends, L.

***

I spotted her.

She was wearing an identical shirt to the one I had on—a light grey T-shirt with a sequinned Spider-Man mask in the corner, which around it read, We met on the Web. A giddy me couldn’t wait for the short escalator ride to end. Her back was to me and facing the baggage claim, so here was my chance to surprise her instead.

I towered over my friend, E, and donned a low, authoritative voice.

“Excuse me, Miss, can you come with me?”

She squealed a greeting to me and I returned it as we hugged for the very first time after two and a half years of online friendship. We would still have about two hours to kill until our mutual Tumblr best friend, L, touched down at Chicago’s O’Hare Airport from across the Pond.

Something I noticed was that E and I carried on talking during our wait like it was second nature, that we hung out like this all the time. Whereas when I met L in person for the first time the year previously, our first meeting was that of quiet, delighted shock, unknowing how to react to one another’s physical presence. It almost felt like a fantasy. The closest thing we’d ever gotten to this was visiting over video chats! I’m not sure what each of these different reactions in these separate meetings meant, but what I do know is that I’ve never had such strong female friendships such as these—so full of uplifting support and love for one another. They are the greatest ladies I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing.

And as a searching L eventually turned the corner to meet us in the Arrivals terminal, I caught sight of her Tom & Grant bandana tied around the handle to her carry-on bag. It was an item she had received in return for helping fund the short film produced in 2018 (I’d bought the ringtone). Seeing the accessory jolted me to remember that the former of the titular short was the reason for this long-awaited get-together holiday in the Windy City in the first place. Tom Cavanagh, unbeknownst to him, had just officially united three online friends, each from a different country, to spend six full days of in-person bonding and a whole lot of fun.

***

I should have been shelving books.

I should have been doing a lot of library-related tasks, but my head was elsewhere. Anywhere other than the small-town public library where I work. Instead, I sat on the carpeted floor of the Junior/Young Adult section with my phone in hand and a dreadful article title staring back at me.

“The Flash: Carlos Valdes and Tom Cavanagh to Exit after 7 Seasons.”

My world felt like it was falling apart.

Tom was leaving? There had been rumours and wonderings spreading around the fandom regarding whether he was leaving the show. With a storyline ending with a monumental sacrifice and a time-travelling man saying his farewells, it all seemed to point to the fact. I should have known… I could have rivalled Supergirl as being the Paragon of Hope after all the optimism I doled out to my followers and friends who would come to me worried Tom would exit the show. I would always give reasons to deny such a thing could happen, claiming that I’d believe when I saw it.

Well, there it was, and I definitely saw it.

One could feel the ripple effect over the internet of the shards of broken and riled-up hearts around the world.

Tom’s exit was on his terms, having not felt challenged by his character’s plotlines, as mentioned in a recent Entertainment Weekly article. As a viewer—and I am a viewer (Mike and Tom Eat Snacks, anyone?), it has been increasingly difficult to look past the missed shots made by story editors and showrunner, so understandably, the actor would want to seek something more exciting and meatier. That said, Tom has always shone on-screen and taken what he’s been given in stride. He turns unearthed material into diamonds and indeed shines on screen. Steals it, even! Tom easily makes the episodes he’s in better, and when he’s missing, you feel the loss. The few episodes of Season 7 without him only give us a tiny hint at how the show will be without him going forward. It much resembles when you might bring out your favourite jigsaw puzzle, only to find that the one piece you need to complete it isn’t there.

***

On a personal note, as I write this, I am roughly 20 followers away from reaching a milestone of 2,000. I have written well over 200 stories for The Flash alone (whether they be short or long, one-shots or chaptered), and goodness knows how many words I’ve generated altogether over the course of these many years with inspiration from the show and my favourite character. I’ve written and co-written novel-length stories, one monumental Wellsian story of which was done alongside L and E (almost solely done through alternating text messaging in the app, Line) that reached over 108,000 words and consisted of 42 chapters. And when I’m not writing for my blog, I’m also working on trying to accomplish my dream of becoming a published author. Just as I thought before I launched my Tumblr blog, I think again now: Might as well give it a shot, right?

***

I have watched virtually everything Tom has been in that I could get my hands on, both physically and electronically. Sure, a few titles are out of my reach and probably lost to the very early 90's forever, but from what I've seen through Tom's filmography is enough to know that he can do anything. He can play the romantic leading man that will make you fall head over heels for him or a deranged killer that will have you genuinely scared of him. That is talent. Tom always brings something new to the table from each role to the next, and (when he's not playing those psycho killers) you can't help but admire his craft.

Not only is his acting stellar, but from what we as fans have gathered on the man, Tom has got to be one of the kindest men in the business. His humour and sheer ridiculousness could get anyone through a tough time (we’ve seen plenty of bloopers and behind-the-scenes videos to prove this!). He has clearly bottled and stored an endless supply of Fountain of Youth™ and each year continues to wow us with his handsomeness. Tom is charming, dedicated, and yes, arguably holds the world record for Bluest Eyes.

In my eyes, Tom Cavanagh gave me the two best friends I could have ever asked for, as well as plenty more lovely friends I’ve continued to make online. (One day, I hope to meet him again so that I can tell him in person how because of him, I’ve met such very important people in my life). Through Tom, I have truly found my passion for writing, and in doing so, segued me to dare to dream of becoming a published novelist. I wholeheartedly believe all of this would not have happened if it weren’t for those first series of events that led me to meet Tom and love and admire him immensely. He is indisputable proof that there are indeed men like him out there. Indeed, he did ruin all of my future expectations of men. He ruined my life in the absolute best way and I am eternally grateful.

I am very much looking forward to what Tom will do next. I think it’s rather needless to say that I will follow him in his career, as he has gained a devoted fan for life. He represents so much to me and so much of it I have gained since meeting him that fateful day, when I thought to myself, Maybe I should buy this T-shirt and get this guy to sign it. Wherever Tom goes in life, I’ll be here to cheer him on.

I have a pretty good feeling plenty of others will, too.

[whatzaoverwatch]

The Reaper of the Opera Chapter 6: Poor Fool, He Makes me Laugh

On with the show right? Right???

First Prev Next

Nighttime/Backstage

The preparations for the evenings’ performance were well underway. The performers rehearsing one more time before the show, the musicians practicing each note while the tailors take in their fittings. The hustle between everyone was a little overwhelming since the show was completely sold out again. With the news of Hana Songs return, they were eager, while also curious on what happened to [Name]. All the pampering and attention was drawn towards Hana as she awaited her moment. Barely lifting a finger while the managers took care of her needs. What she wanted was what she got. While it seemed a little excessive for anyone new taking in the atmosphere, it was just the same as before Reinhardt and Torbjorn bought the theatre. Fareeha, looking rather tiresome of the praises and gaudy display of Hanas’ preparation, simply rolled her eyes and continued stretching.

“Just when I thought things would be different around here. They are spoiling her just as much as Mr. Morrison did.” She complained to Lena and Amelie, who were at her side with their routine.

“Give Mr. Morrison a little bit of credit, at least he stood out of the princess’ way during the show.” Amelie stated bluntly, stretching her leg up perfectly against her figure.

“I just don’t understand why they just don’t let [Name] lead the show,” Lena pouted, looking towards where [Name] stood with Ana for some extra practice, “Didn’t that note Madame Amari got stated that specifically?”

“Yes, but look at the two of them,” she nodded over to the two men who complimented Hana on her final appearance, offering her a spray to help with her vocal chords, “Tell them all you want, they are too stubborn to see the consequences.”

“What is so dangerous about those notes anyways?” Amelie questioned, looking at the ladies shocked expressions strangely. She frowned as if she had said something rude, “Who is this Reaper anyways?”

“Figured an exchange dancer like yourself would ask such a thing,” McCree finally spoke up. The women looked to the stage handler, watching him climb down from the ladder he was using to adjust the lights, “After all, it is a rather frightening tale that doesn’t escape the theatre.”

“Here we go…” Fareeha mumbled, rolling her eyes as the rugged man leaned towards Amelie.

“They say long ago there was this man who performed here in this very theatre. However one day the man took a sinister turn and began to attack the audience, “McCree began to explain, rubbing his hands with the red rag from his pocket, “Then a fire broke out and supposedly killed the madman in a single night. Now his spirit carries on, threatening any who oppose his words. Even steals young, beautiful girls to consume their pretty lil souls.”

“Aww come on Jesse, you are just making that up!” Lena huffed, seeing the disgusted glare of Amelie. McCree merely smirked with a shrug.

“Okay maybe the tale is a little bit exaggerated. But tell me, where do you think [Name] was after her debut performance?” He asked the group, watching them fall into silence with no answer, “What with the faulty lights and shot ropes I say we may have a surprise guest on our hands.”

“What do you think will happen?” Fareeha questioned.

“Who knows, the new guys aren’t taking in those threat to heart. It could be a bloodbath for all we know. Maybe he will cut a few throats, or hang the managers. Can’t really predict what a monster has in store,” Watching the three of them direct their eyes behind him. Feeling a watchful eye look him down as only one woman could do such a thing. Turning over to see Ana with you by her side in uncomfortable silence, “Oh umm, begging your pardon mam. I was just telling the girls-“

“Trying to scare my girls again McCree?” Ana struck him with a pointed look and a raised eyebrow. The cold stare even sending the stage handler a shiver down his spine. Tapping his chest with her index finger, her gaze narrowed, “I suggest if you do not want to be hanged as you say, keep your hands by your eyes and away from my performers.”

He immediately rose his hands to either side of him, swallowing thickly at her warning. Saying his goodbyes and wishes of good luck to the girls, he left to his duties in a hurry. The three dancers look towards Ana, watching her pinch the bridge of her nose in exhaustion.

“Take Jesses words with a grain of salt girls, he only means to frighten you for his own entertainment. This is just another performance night and will be handled like any other show,” Placing a hand on your shoulder to hold your attention, “Keep your head clear my dear. Although your role is much smaller, you remain a vital part of the show.”

The girls simply bowed to their instructor before she made her leave. Heading to the direction of the managers to shoo them away from the spoiled Hana. Lena turned towards you who continued to look rather distracted. She nudged you gently to snap you back into reality.

“Don’t look so glum love, I’m sure you’ll do great.” She assures you with a smile.

Although you wished to agree with her, all you could think of was The Reaper and his mask. Hearing the fainted organ and how much he still whispered in your mind. He even now continued to take over your thoughts, thinking upon his desire for you to be his songstress. There was more to it though, you found more of his black roses appearing in your dressing room. Even cloaking your mirror found no prevail to his siren song. Snapping out of it at the curtain call, you turned to the girls with a gentle bow.

“Break a leg guys.” You quietly spoke before running off. Leaving the girls rather confused before Fareeha spoke.

“She must be thinking about that man that came looking for her.” She concluded, causing Lena to gasp and Amelie to roll her eyes.

“A man?? What’s his name?” Lena pleaded for details, only to be called for places once more. Left with the mystery of who it was, they prepared for the performance to begin.

-

The audience took their places preparing for the show. Torbjorns family occupying the managers box while they assisted with the final touches. Even a surprised Hanzo took his side with Genji once more. He was unsure as to why his brother wanted to attend the show again, but it must have been connected to the young woman Genji wanted to introduce. Claiming her to be an old friend from long ago that was the child of their fathers’ friend. He thought of her as a mere excuse to leave him when the woman didn’t show up. But those excuses were made up by not only the same reserved tickets for tonight’s performance, but affirmation that Hana Song was to perform. Genji might’ve been always wandering, but he always paid attention to what grabbed his attention. He settled into his seat, eyeing Genji as he nervously looked over the stage.

“You seem rather anxious.” He calls his brothers fidgeting, rather annoyed by the movement.

“Forgive me, but I cannot help but worry bout her.” Genji confessed, eyes fixated on the stage with a grimaced look. Hanzo quirked his eyebrow curiously.

“Ah this ‘friend’ of yours. Are you sure the reason she hadn’t appeared was because she simply didn’t want to?” He suggested, receiving a rather stern look from his brother.

“That is not like [Name],” Hanzo suddenly realized the woman he spoke of was the replacement from the night before. Explaining his shock for when she performed, “Although, I can agree that she was rather uncertain on attending. She wouldn’t simply disappear in the night to prove it.”

“People change in time Genji, you know that as well as I do.” Looking over Genjis metal parts, only to look away when his brother sighed.

“Maybe so, but something about this doesn’t sit right. Especially with this ‘Reaper’ that the managers spoke of,” Genji looked around their box with a sigh, “This is to be the box he was to reserve. The managers were more than happy to let us have these tickets. If this man ever does show up, I would like for him to answer a few questions.”

“Why are you so persistent on this matter? This [Name], was she the reason you wanted to leave the clan in the first place?” He asked, bitterly regarding that fateful day. Watching his head hung low, silence lingering between them both before speaking.

“I do not expect you to understand, Hanzo. But as my brother I hope you will place your trust upon my wishes.” Both brothers look into each others eyes, as they did back when they reunited. Hanzo merely sighed before looking to the stage as the lights faded.

“Do what you want Genji. But do not blame me if something doesn’t go your way.”

-

The show began as Hana took the center stage as the countess. Her bright and youthful voice drawing the crowd to the rather comedic performance beforehand. While she remained poised and graceful across the stage, your role was to act like a mere fool upon the stage. A servant boy that had had a forbidden affair with the countess. Upright humiliation as you purposely fell and acted clumsily in front of Hana. Roaring laughter filled the audience at the entertainment. As any performer must be met with such roles in their lifetime. Despite your foolish appearance, Hana remained her pristine, sassy character who laughed behind her fan.

The performers backstage observed as even Torbjorn had to hush Reinhardt from his fit of giggles. Fareeha, Lena, and Amelie taking in their cues when instructed, following the music performed by Lucio in the orchestra pit. What seemed to be a hilarious show, would soon take a dark turn for the worse.

In the shadows above the ceiling, a sinister presence lingered above the chandelier. Observing the show from above with a rather displeased glare. Cloaked in black with his mask worn behind the hood, The Reaper tapped his finger against his crossed arms while he watched. Disgusted by how much they teased and mocked your performance while praising Hana by her voice. He never liked her voice, it shrilled and ached his ears to no end. She truly was a spoiled brat that forced her way into show business. Looking down below to the audience, watching their high-class mugs laugh at such mediocre work. Finally, his gaze fixated upon his reserved Box 5. Occupied by the young man who desired to see you. Watching him smile and gaze upon you irked his stomach entirely. Finally having enough, his voice carried into the theatre to drown everyone in silence.

“Did I not ask for Box 5 to be empty?”

Quiet gasps and murmurs spread to his interruption of the show. Reinhardt and Torbjorn looking rather bewildered by the voice, feeling the worry kick in as they knew exactly who it was. Genji and Hanzo turning suddenly to their box being called, the youngest looking rather unnerved. The music disappearing while the performers froze in fear. The dancers lingered closer together, huddled in fear with Anas gaze very stoic.

“Blimey! That’s the Reaper of the Opera!” Lena whispered in shock, causing the women around her to gasp. Not aware that McCree had stepped away from his place in the commotion.

You were very quick to your feet, wide eyed with fear at the familiar voice. Breaking your character to realize who had spoken. Heart racing and your body trembling. Despite the chandelier covering his appearance, you could feel his eyes upon you in an instant. His voices echoing in your head and infiltrating your mind.

“It’s him.” You spoke in disbelief. A sudden tsk from your co-star was heard, watching Hana sneer at your peril.

“Your role is supposed to be silent! Remember??” She hissed pointing her fan at you like a command. Turning to the audience, realizing the harshness of her works. Forming one of her fake smiles, she snapped at Lucio for his attention, “Maestro, take it from the top of the number please?”

“You still speak high and mighty, little rabbit. Let’s see how you are without your foot.” Reaper growled, disappearing into the dark. Hana took no quarrel to the threat as she asked for her spray again. Not even gazing at what was being used before drawing her attention to the audience.

She began to sing once more, only for her voice to sound raspy and breathless. Her eyes wide in horror as the audience was left to listen in disbelief. Clearing her throat once more, she tried again only for it to sound just as rancid as before. The force and sounds it made left the audience in a mix of shock and laughter. Leaving her in a state of shock and humiliation at her misery. Turning the show into a complete disaster before everyones eyes. Reinhardt and Torbjorn were swift into action while they called for the curtains. Escorting the furious Hana off stage and into Anas care as she is left to sob in croaked tears. As they moved back towards center stage, they drag you along with them.Each arm held by the other.

“Ladies and gentlemen, there will be a slight change to tonight's performance,” Reinhardt announced to the rather confused audience, “Tonight our lead shall be now played by Lady [Name]! In the meantime, please do not leave your seats as we will take a brief intermission with our ballet from the play!”

“Ballet??? That’s not till Act Three!” Lucio whisper shouted from his place, looking frazzled at his music sheets. Torbjorn glared at the musician before clearing his throat.

“Yes, the ballet. So please, take your seats and just…stay,” Torbjorn was quick to say before dragging [Name] behind the curtains. Leaving a confused Reinhardt to search for the split in the curtains to follow suit. More laughter ensued as Torbjorn pulled you along to your dressing room, “Someone get [Name] into the understudy dresses! This is becoming my worst nightmare, and where is McCree??”

The various shouts and rummaging of the stage could be heard from the scaffolding. Reaper observed the chaos from above as he made his way across. Seeing the dancers prepare for the ballet. Watching you being escorted into your dressing room. Knowing he had already planted the understudy dress and a vase of black roses for you in waiting. He knew his warnings would fall on deaf ears, so he had already planned for the backup. Switching Hanas vocal spray with a rather unpleasant concoction. Sabotaging Hana’s voice was only the beginning if his warnings were never to be met. There was still much to be done. Before he could move onto the next course of action, he was halted by the sound of a gun clicking from behind.

“That’s far enough Mr. Reaper,” Turning himself around, he found McCree standing right behind him. A revolver in the stage handlers grasp, pointing at him aloofly. Seeing the rather serious look in his mug, “Don’t you know people nowadays complain about the show in the papers? No need to ruin a couple folks precious evening.”

Reaper merely laughed at McCrees words. His voice ragged as they both stood above the stage at this point. The music returning as the dancers took their place.Dancing beneath them to a song that contrasted the situation above them.

“You think you can take me? You are in over your head, ingrate.” Reaper threatened, facing Jesse completely.

“Tough words for someone who likes to hide in the dark. You may have slipped past me before, but you aren’t getting away so easily this time. So why don’t we cut the charade and take you to where you truly belong: behind bars.” Stepping towards the man, keeping his balance on the high beams that they stood upon.

Before he could take another step, Reaper disappeared into a cloud of smoke. Catching McCree off guard as he aims for the darkness. Unaware that the smoke slipped past him and grabbed McCree from behind. Grabbing McCree into a head lock position. McCree struggled against the shadows grasp as he tried to escape the position. Finding his balance lost, Reaper took advantage by tossing him down against the high beam. The gun skidding across the beam, just balancing against the edge and far from Jesses reach. The stage handler reached for his gun, only for his tattoo arm to be stepped on. Gritting his teeth in pain, he found a large gun pointed towards him. Pressed harshly against the flesh for him to stop his attempts to grab his own weapon. The Reaper stood above him with very intense eyes.

“I thought I taught you better than that, Jesse,” He snarled, clicking his gun. The music building quickly below them. The dancers pirouetting faster and faster to the music, “But you are nothing more than the show boater from the Deadlock Freakshow.”

McCrees eyes widened, looking up to the masked man as he pressed the gun against the arm at the end of the high beam. Looking into the hollow eyes to see a familiar glare.

“Gabriel??” Was the only thing he could say before a shot cracked through the theatre.

To be continued

[pinkletterday]

Okay so the Flash tag was very misleading. This wasn't the best 100th episode they could have done but it was the sweetest.

Don't get me wrong, none of that painfully contrived plot made a lick of sense, starting with being so blasé about going back in time when its pretty much the golden rule for them to not do that anymore (and er. Did Hunter Solomon just get Time Wraithed five episodes too early? What?) Nora not knowing Eobard killed her grandmother what in fuck and the whole thing about popping up the same day S2 Barry did (I know it was supposed to be all tense and menacing but I was giggling so hard. Someone should write a fic about various Barry Allens interrupting Thawne's work day to heckle him into fixing more and more shit. "Hi. My name is Barry Allen. You killed my mother. How do I fix the plumbing in STAR Labs? Bitch.")

AND FOR GOD'S SAKE WHY DID THEY KEEP VOLUNTEERING THAWNE INFORMATION.

After all that, the plan didn't even work.

BUT OH MY GOD I LOVED KILLER FROST. She is the most badass bitch and I can tell DP has a blast playing her. Train her up and send her against Cicada for real, cause that fight I would watch.

I loved seeing Eowells with Cisco and Caitlin, I loved revisiting all those milestone moments through Nora's eyes, and my God this episode was 75 % the tour de force that is Tom Cavanaugh. He nailled every scene - the suave menace of pre-series Eowells, the barely contained malice of S1 Eowells, the frenetic single-minded, almost callous version of Harry we first met and (sigh) Sherloque. Who somehow managed to be so distinct from the other personas that I didn't even think to compare his absurdity to the groundedness of Harry and Eowells. Cavanaugh's direction was also beautiful and seamless, even with all the recycled shots.

I didn't even mind missing Iris as much as I would have - she was always there somehow, maybe because of Nora. Mama Flash trying her hardest not to be the closed off woman who holds her daughter back, encouraging her husband to do the same. And then stepping back and letting them do their thing, trusting them to come back home to her.

Seeing her shooting Savitar to save Barry, seeing her be the one to hold and comfort him before they were ever together and then watching them so young and innocent waiting in the crowd during the pilot really encapsulated their journey together (thank god Eddie wasn't in this. Nothing against the character, I just hate that he existed at all). Iris has always been Barry's secret hope through his whole life. During the Zoom episode they were still tentatively trying to find a new footing between feelings that could not yet be spoken and the entirety of S3 was spent in terror that fate would still rip her away. Now they're rock solid and their daughter is right there next to Barry, the promise and realization of everything he had ever hoped for him and Iris.

I love Iris and Westallen, but The Flash has always been Barry Allen's story first. Taking his daughter through the journey of all his mistakes and defeats instead of his victories was such an aching, vulnerable choice. I'm not perfect, I've never been the man you think I was, I have made so many mistakes and been hurt so badly and all I have learned from it is how much I cannot change, no matter how powerful I become, no matter how much I love. It was the moment when he went from "father" to "Barry Allen" in Nora's eyes; when she started to see him as a person first. I understand and I still want to know you. Still love you. It was the most heartaching moment. And such a shock for Nora to realize that they both know the trauma of losing a parent, such a terrible connection to share.

Nora visiting her grandparents killed me. The Allens so young and happy and whole, not knowing their lives are about to be ripped apart in moments. Barry simply turning up at her side, almost casually, guessing she'd go there because he does the same thing. The quiet, sad resignation in his eyes when he says "every day." He has had to experience and accept Nora's own nightmare, that nothing she does will change her family's fate. How many times has he time travelled just to see his parents like this, knowing he could change it but also knowing the price of doing so is too great? His family in front of him, flesh and blood and alive, but still only ghosts he can never touch nor save?

But then Nora's there, again the living reminder of all that he stands to gain, all that of himself and his loves that will continue. Nora carries Barry's mother and father in her blood, Iris and Joe, and the legacy of his own life. And she's there, smiling at him, pulling him out of the past into the future.

Barry is still young, but he's aged beyond his years. The non-linear confusion of his life doesn't help him advance in stages. He's twenty-five and shaped by a vendetta ten years into the future, he's twenty seven and faced with himself a thousand years old and warped, he's watched every timeline unfold in the Speed Force till his mind broke apart, and now he's the father of a young woman he's never yet held as a baby and still loves with all his heart because she is his. It's such a surreal dissonance of age and identity when Nora calls him "old man". For a moment, he remembers that he's still young, and young enough to be hilariously offended by it.

I'm not going to touch on the Nora-working-with-Thawne "reveal" because we've seen that coming from the first. Instead I want to gush about Jessica Parker Kennedy. You guys, this woman is incredible. She was the sweetest, most precious thing this episode, the perfect audience surrogate. She has killed every scene she's in so far this season, so much so that her calling Barry and Iris "Mom and Dad" has never seemed weird, her love and connection to them has never seemed untrue, keeping her character so emotionally balanced right where she needs to sell it that we don't think overmuch about her bizarre age situation (2049? Really?). I don't know why this fandom doesn't appreciate her more, especially the Westallen fandom. Nora is literally the legacy of the show and of Barry and Iris's love. I cannot imagine anyone other than Jessica doing it so much justice.

Special notes:

- I wish we had more Golden Trio moments. Barry, Cait and Cisco's friendship was the lynchpin of the first two seasons and its disintegration in the third season is something that still hasn't been healed. SHOW ME BARRY'S CARE AND LOVE FOR CAITLIN SNOW. SHOW ME BARRY'S LOVE FOR CISCO.

- I am always torn between appreciating what this show wants to tell me and frustration of how badly it's usually told. Nora seeing Iris being Barry's comfort and support during one of his worst moments before they were ever together should have been heartwarming. But instead of showing a sweet, silent moment where Barry is allowed to curl up in her lap while she holds him in the aftermath of a traumatic experience, we see her pushing him to get up again before he even changes out of his suit. It made the scene seem so forced and contrived. Sometimes it's like the writers only know the theory of how humans work.

- It stood out to me again how embedded Cisco is in the emotional narrative of this show. It's Barry's story but Cisco's universe, his presence is vital, ubiquitous, pervasive. Seeing him innocent and sweet and vulnerable with Eowells, craving his approval, and then seeing him face down Cicada as a confident full-fledged superhero (are my baby's hands healed now?) was so satisfying. His character arc has been so amazing and consistent through four seasons of shoddy and uneven writing. He is literally the Samwise to Barry's Frodo and the fact that we havent heard stories of Uncle Cisco from Nora is a farce.

- I know fandom jumped on "at least you still have one" as a reference to Donovan's existence but I'm wondering if it's a reference to Thawne's own daughter Melonie. Did she still marry Don in his future or was she erased?

- I like that Eowells touched on the fact that Savitar was actually Barry. It gets persistently glossed over, that while Barry can't be held responsible for his future self, it was very much still him. I hate that Savitar was our Barry because the fact that any version of him could ever kill Iris is such a fundamental betrayal of his character, but jeez, if you're going to put it out there at least explore the ramfications of that concept in full.

- I missed Jesse L. Martin so much. I had really hoped we could have at least gotten five minutes of recycled footage of him.

- Also missed my cinnabun Cecile, and I want to see Iris interacting with her new sister! I need her to hold Jenna trying to imagine what Nora will feel like in her arms. I want Wally to be delighted at having a sibling he can watch grow up. GIVE ME MY WEST FAMILY DAMN IT.

- I still want my vow renewal (will literally kill someone for it at this point, preferably Guggy. No one will miss him) but that last iconic porch scene with the Allens is a compromise I can live with.

All in all, not the best 100th episode we could have gotten but very far from the worst.