#and it's 6 PM and it's all due at 11:59 and i can't get into the damn website to submit anything

[rose-tinted-nostalgia]

the universe just keeps encouraging my procrastination, and i'm here for it but probably i shouldn't be.

[theorist-influencer-untitled]

7.2.24 Tuesday

2:50 am

Still,have windblow...

Still,having headache.... It is weird that I suddenly wanna open my Tagged to go live then I can't open it... Hmm.... Even my Tagged they took away or stole... It is totally bullshit and unfair...

I feel bitterish and hurt... People of INC or church of christ ??? Are smashing me or some other faker group of people...

I'm still hurting about these things... They just took away my life since 2007 and I can't accept them....They wanted to be me and they are able to be me but stealing away everything from me like my life,my pesonality,some of my good old friends and my bf's are totally unfair!

I can't open my Tagged via Facebook or Google....Weird! 17 years please stop smashing me too much of being me ...Too much of taking away my happiness...

I just wanna embrace my cousin-white... It is selfish not to be known but I will love him...

9:57 am

Uncle DD and Aunt Karen dropped by quickly here then went away again... They just talked to Harvey for something...

10:25 am

Still,have windblow...

I feel bitterish....There are so many people here in Cavite who took away my glow or my thunder "for so long"...

I hate them for smashing me without a fair fight....

10:59 am

Still,have windblow...

I feel jealous coz I'm alone...

If someone took my love without a fair fight in-front of me, I hope I have good angels to kill that whoever stole my love without a fair fight!

11:30 am

Still,have windblow...

I don't know, it is my dream to have a cubby hole or nook in the house or my cafe spot with a window on its side...

I have so many dreams and they took it all away even my love... I feel bitterish!!!

17 years you took it away from me without a fair fight!

I really want this in the house... It relaxes my soul... I really want it, in the house and my coffee...

It is cubby-hole or my niche in the house...

I'm not acting here but when my maturity went to a real mature adult... I can't expain my inner emotion why I wanna have this in my house, 17 years passed us by for nothing...

They took away my life... I can't expain the happiness if I have it in the house.

3:25 pm

Hmm.... Who is this TP Angel?

Uppish people... But I'm with Sir Jay.... I need to do my medical but I'm still looking for money...

It looks like on the hunt this TP Angel..

3:32 pm

I'm having headache angels... This is not my ideal life with my Uncle's can't assist me on other things and there are people who are on the movement to damage my entire future...

6:07 pm

Still,have windblow...

I hate that fucking Burger, my fake half-sister on my biological mother who is with "Moises Miranda" now on their fb profile and very cutie together with a NECKTIE! Iw!!! MARRIED? WOW!!!

I hate it coz they can be cutie2x again and always stealing my thunder!

Hmm.... Interesting that "Moises Miranda's Profile" can't get a screenshots??? Wow! Cavite State Univerisity computer nerd??? Hmmm...

6:45 pm

Still,have windblow...

I need to find money to do my medical angels... I'm super stressed-out, I feel that my muscle on my entire body is squeezing and I feel like vomiting due to stress...

I need to keep on doing stretching coz my S-bones are still aching... I feel like vomiting...

6:48 pm

I wanna be stronger than my bf like on my "cousin-white" but situation like this I need a lift... I feel bullshit, I feel like collapsing.... And literally but I have to control...

7:40 pm

I feel so down, I'm thinking only of my cousin-white or Garret for something... But reality wise, I wanna have my cousin-white, I feel like killing every woman that will come near him wherever he is... I don't know, it is my pride... I want my cousin-white... I feel like suiciding if someone is trapping me that I don't know but definitely will do it live on any social media...

It's been a long time this trap and it hurts me so much... I'm waiting for so long and nothing happen for 17 years...

It is unfair that they just got all my friends or some friends are fake on hiding something...

It is so unfair... I wasn't able to enjoy or being a star to feel pretty or to have success... They just got my 17 years... I wasn't able to gain upper friends, I'm always trap here in Cavite.

Hating some old friends who are fakers, who had an agenda to trap me for so long for them to compete me.... My deep inside is irritated!

I wasn't able to do my abs for 17 years, they just trap me, then whoever is that fucking guy who wanted to trap me and appear that he is greater than me that I didn't know him or didn't ask anything from him... What he did was unfair... He didn't let me grow... I wasn't able to enjoy my starbucks moments for 17 years that supposed to be I'm there everyday,drinking my frap or fruit juices my shallow happiness or everyday ordering... I wasn't able to travel as well even here like going to ilocos to see sand-dunes.

My cousin-white can be greater than me but if he will not take me then I want a pull down... Garret can go up but I want a balance on something that I wanted them blackened if they feel super handsome...

I don't want Borgy and Mitch to be wealthy without my approval!

8:55 pm

I'm so stressed-out in life... My deep inside is crying...

9:11 pm

Oh! God extend my life and the good people one me...

I'm super stress....Super stress...

9:20 pm

Uncle Jun is reacting negatively on the wet floor in the kitchen and blaming it on me... Not my ideal life oh! GOD HEAR ME, not my ideal life with my Uncle Jun or DD....

Oh! God hear me, I don't deserve this... I'm so stress he is shouting on me again and again...

It came from the ref....and the tube under the kitchen there is a hole on it and there are so many rats.... It is not my ideal life that he is shouting on me angels...

17 years too much of being together here and that attitude is on and off and no progress at all... He always dropped me down, one of the reasons nobody wants me...

Can someone kill Uncle Jun for the better world???

[ohimesama]

1.13.23 Friday

8:02 am

Still hating the windblow trap....I wasn't able to attend my duty today on Mommy Adnil coz I vomited and had headache and slight fever but I'm ohkay now... Still,having mild headache and still having aching left sciatica...

Anid my friend texted me how am I? I replied I will attend my duty for next week, I just need to rest this week...

Even Ms Jo, texted me to take an antigen test coz I have a fever and I told her I'm ohkay, I don't have covid but I have stress sickness and I need a sciatica treatment but I'm on a tight budgeting now...

I thought RC is a friend but I just realize he can't be a friend... RC just want a recognition or he didn't ask for it, it became an added embellishment if I acknowledge him here putting some good phrase but he can't be a friend to me...

I need some good upper friends... Who is having maturity just like me...

8:59 am

I think I'm already menopause, I hate this cult they just put an end to me... But hoping a foreigner will still love me in spite of if I can't give birth...

I'm so stress having this windblow trap of Manaloz...I feel jealous on my old friends who gave birth and who is working... They just trapped me to reach the menopause. I don't wanna know them...I feel hurt... They just damage me...

I just wanna have an upper Filipino Friends...

I feel jealous on some old friends who gave birth and have a perfect life and have a job of their own....

9:16 am

In a way I have a full complex....In a way sometimes I don't wanna give birth coz I don't have savings and I'm super self-pitying....

Some are fake in the family... I feel ugly and fat... I have so many white hair and thank God for the hair dye....

I still wanna see donkey and camel... I feel so frustrated coz of the fake cult of ManaloZ...

9:23 am

I wanna leave the hometown....I wanna have a life away from here... They just hurt me in Cavite...They just wanna win for their own sake...

9:30 am

I wanna have new upper friends...I'm longing to have new upper friends...

9:37 am

Mommy Adnil live in Lacub Place in-front of Lacub Elementary School and their subdivision is Sdleifneerg pronounced as ( esdifnerg ) subdivision... Colapmas 11 on Zenosnal st. Black 9 lot 22.

When you enter their subdivision there is a wooden house on the right side when you enter the gate of their subdivision and I'm super loving it... Aside from the glass house that I dream to have...I love the wooden house that I saw on Mommy Adnil's subdivision...

9:59 am

Lemme just describe Mommy Adnil's house... It is a simple but presentable and modernize style of high-ceiling... But due to pandemic all of us went down and their private resort was also closed....Mommy Adnil owned a private pool resort beside their "high-ceiling" house...

Mommy Adnil is nice but powerful, killer but sweet that's why she reached the top position of being an Avon Head Leader or top seller and she told me that she was able to create that pool resort coz of her hardwork in Avon for 8 million and she wanted me to get her crown and I just laughed coz I don't know,I have other plans... Hmm... Hmm...

5:48 pm

Uncle Jun is asking another 100 today, I'm not yet a rich woman... So scary that he will probably kill us... Everything is on a budget...

I'm having headache and I need a sciatica therapy and I feel like vomiting today... My priority is our food in the house... Uncle Jun is somehow insensitive...

6:17 pm

I always buy him his personal toiletries as payment for John like his silka and I told him to model the silka products... I hope Uncle Jun will understand that I'm not yet a rich woman... I bought him silka soap if I have extra even his Silka Toner and recently his Silka Lotion Green Papaya... How much is the Large Silka Green Papaya? It is 100 plus... That Uncle Jun can't understand...

What about my personal needs? I need to save as well and for my baby John...

6:58 pm

One more thing Uncle Jun is not really cleaning... I mean the poops of Taffy our new puppy... I just remind him in a good way that please uncle Jun clean the poops of Taffy... Sometimes he is not cleaning coz he feels lazy and just doing his tik-tokings...

[killerqueenjoy]

99 Question Tag

okay okay I know i got tagged to do this like a month ago on my main blog by @santonicababy iM SORRY LIN ILY BUT THIS WAS SO DAMN LONG

1) DO YOU SLEEP WITH YOUR CLOSET DOORS OPEN OR CLOSED

I sleep in the room where everybodies closets are and they all gotta be closed goddamn do you know how spooky it is to even have one open during the night

2) DO YOU TAKE THE SHAMPOOS AND CONDITIONER BOTTLES FROM HOTELS

my parents do, but alas I don't use them in case they have silicones or sulphates in them because I got a whole lotta curls to protect

3)DO YOU SLEEP WITH YOUR SHEETS TUCKED IN OR OUT?

if this refers to the sheet protecting the mattress, then my answer is in because how the fuck would you be able to sleep with that moving around???

4) HAVE YOU STOLEN A STREET SIGN BEFORE

NO SORRY IM BORING

5)DO YOU LIKE TO USE POST IT NOTES

heck yeah, but for random shit

6) DO YOU EVER CUT OUT COUPONS BUT THEN NEVER USE THEM

nee my parents are fancy fuckers who use the coupons on their phone (our local supermarket has a damn app skskksksk)

7) WOULD YOU RATHER BE ATTACKED BY A BIG BEAR OR A SWARM OF BEES

a bear because its one giant son of a bitch and not millions of tiny motherfuckers and also I've never been stung by a bee and intend to keep it that way because majority of my family seem to be allergic

8) DO YOU HAVE FRECKLES

nope! I have a couple beauty spots on my hands and face but thats kinda it

9) DO YOU ALWAYS SMILE FOR PICTURES

not really but if I've been told to smile then its 200% dead inside

10) WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE

i find many things annoying

11)DO YOU EVER COUNT YOUR STEPS WHEN YOU WALK

only when i go up and down stairs, but i also try to make sure i step with each foot equally (if that makes sense) and i step on only certain colour tiles when im bored

12) HAVE YOU EVER PEED IN THE WOODS

the real question is have i ever been in the woods? both answers are no

13) HAVE YOU EVER POOPED IN THE WOODS

refer to question 12

14)ummmm idk what this question is meant to be curse you Lin

15)DO YOU CHEW YOUR PENS AND PENCILS

nope, the idea weirds me out

16) HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE YOU SLEPT WITH THIS WEEK

none, this week and in general

17) WHAT SIZE IS YOUR BED

one person and a long yet smol doggo size

18) WHAT IS YOUR SONG OF THE WEEK

Eddie from the Rocky Horror Picture Show has been stuck in my head for the whole week so yeah i guess that

19)IS IT OKAY FOR GUYS TO WEAR PINK

HeLL YEAH DUDE HAVE YOU SEEN RAMI MALEK IN PINK

SKSKSKSKS END MY LIFE

but yeah, anyone can wear anything they want to wear (although a suit made out of meat might not be wise)

20) DO YOU STILL WATCH CARTOONS

dudeeeee scooby doo and tom and jerry are my jam I watch them on the regular (among other things)

21)WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVOURITE MOVIE

uhhm idkkkkk I tend to repress bad movies sksksk

22)WHERE WOULD YOU BURY HIDDEN TREASURE IF YOU HAD SOME

idk shove it in the closet ig at least it will be hidden behind my sexuality

23)WHAT DO YOU DRINK WITH DINNER

I usually only drink before or after but ig water??? cooldrink if I'm in a restaurant

24)WHAT DO YOU DIP A CHICKEN NUGGET IN

depends on the nug

25)WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE FOOD

How dare you assume i only have one favourite

tbh it depends cos i love pizza and pasta and stuff but then i cannot live with my granny's curries ksksmks

26) WHAT MOVIES COULD YOU WATCH OVER AND OVER AGAIN AND STILL LOVE

borhap, sing street, rhps, the natm movies, the harry potter movies, any mcu movies

27)LAST PERSON YOU KISSED/KISSED YOU

ahhahahahahahha bold of you to assume anyone wants to do that

28) WERE YOU EVER A BOY/GIRL SCOUT

nope but I was a catrobat which is basically my preschools acrobatics team that was actually really terrible

29)WOULD YOU EVER STRIP OR POSE NUDE IN A MAGAZINE

nahh m8

30) WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WROTE A LETTER TO SOMEONE ON PAPER

this week for a transactional task at school (It was in Afrikaans and I got a C skskskks)

31)CAN YOU CHANGE THE OIL IN A CAR

omg no

32)EVER GOTTEN A SPEEDING TICKET

not old enough to drive!

33)EVER RAN OUT OF GAS

my parents never have for as long as i can remember

34)WHATS YOUR FAVOURITE KINDA SANDWHICH

cheese because I am actually John Deacon

35)BEST THING TO EAT FOR BREAKFAST

MUFFINS!!!!

36)WHAT IS YOUR USUAL BEDTIME

school nights its 11pm otherwise i dont have one lol

37)ARE YOU LAZY

YES BUT MY LAZINESS MAKES ME ANXIOUS OOF

38)WHEN YOU WERE A KID WHAT DID YOU DRESS UP AS FOR HALLOWEEN

we dont celebrate that here but i rly want to it seems fun!

39)WHAT IS YOUR CHINESE ASTROLOGICAL SIGN

Ram, which is really cool because im an Aries, so I'm sheep squared

40)HOW MANY LANGUAGES CAN YOU SPEAK

English, Afrikaans (at a basic highschool level), I could speak very vERY basic isiZulu when I was younger but I'm not sure about now, I know a bit of French and Telugu, and I'm gonna start learning Hindi soon!!

41) DO YOU HAVE ANY MAGAZINE SUBSCRIPTIONS

nee

42) WHICH ARE BETTER, LEGOS OR LINCOLN LOGS

i didn't play much with legos and i have no idea what the second one is rip

43)ARE YOU STUBBORN

to an extent

44)WHO IS BETTER, LENO OR LETTERMAN

I kept reading Leno as Lenin ffs

45)EVER WATCH SOAP OPERAS

I watch them occasionally with my granny, but I don't keep up with them very well (Kasamh Se is my shit tho)

46)ARE YOU AFRAID OF HEIGHTS

no, im afraid of falling in general tho

47) DO YOU SING IN THE CAR

My dad and I bop frequently to Never Gonna Give You Up in the car, and also classic bollywood songs (we have even learnt the choreography for some)

48)DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER

i perform

49) DO YOU DANCE IN THE CAR

well theres not exactly much space

50)EVER USED A GUN

nope

51)LAST TIME YOU GOT A PORTRAIT TAKEN BY A PHOTOGRAPHER

not sure

52)DO YOU THINK MUSICALS ARE CHEESY

most are but thats why i like them

53) IS CHRISTMAS STRESSFUL

we don't celebrate because we're not Christian (we still eat a lot and exchange presents tho), but it can get stressful if we have to visit extended family, mostly because my extended family loves to insult everything about me so thats great!

54)EVER EAT A PIEROGI

not i good sir

55) FAVOURITE TYPE OF FRUIT PIE

never had one, it doesnt appeal to me

56) OCCUPATIONS YOU WANTED TO BE WHEN YOU WERE A KID

a vet

57)DO YOU BELIEVE IN GHOSTS

i am a ghost

58)EVER HAD A DEJA-VU FEELING

not that i remember

59)DO YOU TAKE A VITAMIN DAILY

yes, I take a multi vitamin, a vitamin D pill because I'm vitamin D deficient, and im not sure if this is a vitamin or not but i take evening primrose oil so that im not outwardly a bitch due to pms

60)DO YOU WEAR SLIPPERS

i wear slipper socks, because my doggo got jealous of my doggie slippers and murdered them in cold blood

61)DO YOU WEAR A BATH ROBE

i have one and rarely use it because i forget it exists

62)WHAT DO YOU WEAR TO BED

a random shirt and pants, though ive been known to kick pants off (ive been doing that since birth), occasionally i manage to get the matching pj set

63)WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CONCERT

ive unfortunately never been to a concert before

64)WALMART TARGET OR KMART

ive never seen any of these stores in my country

65)NIKE OR ADIDAS

i own neither

66) CHEETOS OR FRITOS

neither

67)PEANUTS OR SUNFLOWER SEEDS

Peanuts because thats my doggos name!

68) EVER HEARD OF THE GROUP TRES BIEN

no sorry

69)EVER TAKE DANCE LESSONS

i went to a bhangra class for about a year, and we performed for our parents at the end of that year (i was in one of the few groups that didnt have to dance in lehengas thank goodness)

70)IS THERE A PROFESSION YOU PICTURE

YOUR FUTURE SPOUSE DOING

probably something creative, but I don't mind as long as they're happy with what they're doing and its not harming others!

71)CAN YOU CURL YOUR TONGUE

yep

72)EVER WON A SPELLING BEE

never entered one, having to spell out loud makes me anxious

73)HAVE YOU EVER CRIED BECAUSE YOU WERE SO HAPPY

i think so

74)OWN ANY RECORD ALBUMS

nope

75)OWN A RECORD PLAYER

i wish

76)DO YOU REGULARLY BURN INCENSE

my granny burns incense while I'm at school because my mom and i both get really sick when its just been lit and the smell is strong. Going to the temple is a damn nightmare because of it

77)EVER BEEN IN LOVE

no, too busy fangirling

78)WHO WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE IN CONCERT

oof a long list

Queen, Twenty One Pilots, Waterparks, Frank Iero and the Future Violents (ffs fronk stop changin the name), Panic! at the Disco...to name a few

79)WHAT WAS THE LAST CONCERT YOU SAW

refer to question 63

80)HOT TEA OR COLD TEA

both

81)TEA OR COFFEE

coffee

82)SUGAR COOKIES OR SNICKERDOODLES

sugar cookies

83)CAN YOU SWIM WELL

i wouldn't drown, but im no professional either

84)CAN YOU HOLD YOUR BREATH WITHOUT HOLDING YOUR NOSE

im doing it right now

85)ARE YOU PATIENT

eh

86)DJ OR BAND AT A WEDDING

I've only ever been to Hindi,Tamil and Telugu weddings and lemme tell you 90% of the time bands flop at those weddings because they can't sing the classics without failing miserably, so DJs are generally better. However, in that case, if a band can perform those songs, then I'd prefer a band ig

87)EVER WON A CONTEST

yep, a couple of reading contests

88)HAVE YOU EVER HAD PLASTIC SURGERY

nope, not planning on it

89)WHICH ARE BETTER, BLACK OR GREEN OLIVES

dont like olives rip

90)CAN YOU KNIT OR CROCHET

i can knit!

in fact, my friends and i are so cool that we're in our schools knitting club (which besides myself, @grandfunnyemopainter and @imjustabruh , only has 2 other members)

91)BEST ROOM FOR A FIREPLACE

lounge or study/library

92)DO YOU WANT TO GET MARRIED

i guess, its not on my goal list tho

93)IF MARRIED, HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN MARRIED

no

94)WHO WAS YOUR HIGHSCHOOL CRUSH

currently in highschool, and in love with the borhap cast, sebastian stan, stephanie beatriz and band members (theres more but yeah)

95)DO YOU CRY AND THROW A FIT UNTIL YOU GET YOUR OWN WAY

nope, i have only two ways to deal, be a total pushover or a total bitch

96)DO YOU HAVE KIDS

nope

97)DO YOU WANT KIDS

kind of undecided, but i do want more pets

98)WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE COLOUR

Dark Blue

99)DO YOU MISS ANYONE RIGHT NOW

my dog, shes been ignoring me for about four hours now because I stayed at school for an extra hour (for knitting club!)

@softspaceboibrian @roger-taylor-owns-my-wigg @im-inlovewithmycar do it cowards