#and it still does!! I think it’s one of the cooler older art pieces

[narsh-potatoes]

Never apologize for rambling abt your OCs on my post. I love y ou (and HOHHH THAT SOUNDS SO INTERSETING I'M LOOKING)

OKAY COOL FUCK YEAH THANKS

im using you as an excuse to talk about my very own home-grown blorbos now

So!!!!!!!!! i literally only have half of a design for the two of these ocs, i've only drawn one of them ONCE and i don't count it cuz i wanna redesign him COMPLETELY (that piece is not even canon, i had to do that for a class so i put stuff in there that doesn't even belong to the type of story it is </3), i've written for the two of them a couple times but im not even sure THAT'S canon anymore

(here's the art in case you don't wanna click on a link)

i think the writing might still be canon tho, i do still kinda like a lot of the stuff it went over with that. N E WAYS.

basically there's this pair of witches (they don't. really have. names. oops. they did but i don't like them anymore) who enlisted and then eventually rose to the top of fighting this war/apocalypse/encroaching disaster that has been ongoing for a LONG time. like, they're at the end of the world but turns out the end of the world is a hell of a lot slower than anyone imagined. they've been fighting it for a long time (and it does involve actual fighting? like i like to think that this apocalypse acts more as like. locust swarm but the bugs are big big buggy boys that hates you hates you hates you and eats the magic out of the world)

and the first (we'll call him A) is the one who rose up in the ranks to be best of the best very quickly, because his kind of magic is very powerful and was critically effective in the fight. and the second guy (we'll call him B) is kind of. worst of the best. SORT OF. he was best of the best because he fought alongside A and B's brand of magic explicitly deals with the bond the two of them shared. (i call it bonds magic cuz i can't think of something better for now) (yes it's power of friendship) (there more to that but whatever) it was IMMENSELY powerful!!! not moreso than A's magic, but still!! very powerful!!! so B rose up because A pulled him up (not entirely true!!! but you get the point. nuance)

BUT THEN. sometime after they had been in the war for a long ass time, A leaves. either from shame, either he's disillusioned, something happened, he won't say. and just kind of. leaves B behind. who still is very much part of the war and won't say anything to sway A's mind because he cares too much about what he thinks

years later, B's still part of the war/doom effort. and magic in the world has kind of deteriorated so much that it's. honestly kind of hard to come across a solid magic user these days. they still teach them and still get people to join the effort, but compared to the older days, it's a lot less. people can learn magic, everyone can, but it's hard to get like. a professional, someone who has unlocked the higher abilities of magic. people like A or B.

speaking of! yeah. B is still part of the war effort. and it's NOW at the period of time where he's the worst of the best, but he's the only one they've got. they still keep him around because who else is there, really, and also he can still utilize the powerful bond magic he made way back when with A, so he's still very powerful but it's just. different. ya know? he's standing in the shadow of just the IDEA of A, and he's not even here anymore. and it's not filled with resentment, never. never resentment. he could never tarnish that. it's only ever love. and looking up to A. it didn't feel like he cast a shadow because to B, to him, he only ever cast light.

but also. A left. left him. alone.

so he's dealing with that in a perfectly reasonable manner (not thinking about it)

meanwhile A has decided to live a pastoral life away from the apocalypse and is totally not repressing his issues either. <3.

and like!!! the council or whatever that's in charge of all the witches is like "hey. B. you know your way cooler friend? you still keep in touch right?" and sends him off to go find A again after all these years to bring him back to the war and there's a whole mess of meeting again and having to meet with all the things you left unsaid, and all the everything and OOUAOUGHFF it's a whole mess.

anyways i want to make this a comic but also i kind of need to. yknow. design and draw the comic if i want to make the comic. so like. rage.

[soapexclamationmark]

HAS SOME REFERENCES TO SPOILERS UP TO EGGHEAD

So i really really like one piece so ive been starting to re-read it the past few days and i just finished up orange town and i wanted to talk about it, because its a lot cooler than i remember! first of all, i really appreciate chou-chous part, i know thats a pretty lukewarm take, but its the first time in the whole series where we see luffy fight for someone else, and its the first time we see him get angry over injustice, and it does a GREAT job setting up the tone for the grand adventure that follows (note while im doing minor editing to make sure this post isnt shit, still probably is, but we also got to see luffy fight for the small girl in romance dawn, but chou-chou is cooler than her and i still think this example truly shines as an early example of this theme so im keeping it)

as always Oda does a really good job of making luffy's anger really *feel* impactful. the scene afterwards where luffy gives chouchou the bag of dog food that he got from the burning building is also amazing and really shows that going forward its not only luffy's wrath that matters, but his love for those facing injustice. honestly this arc does a LOT to introduce luffy's character, the moment when he smashed the mayor into the wall to knock him out. him doing this still works in his what we have seen previously, but alongside his interactions with the townsfollk after the battle with buggy we can see that even if luffy sometimes struggles to understand people (its ok my autistic king, we've all been there) he is shockingly emotionally intellegent. also, the art in this arc is SO much better than romance dawn. maybe its a personal thing but i dont really care for romance dawns art style, its a bit to simple and overly round for me, but orange town has a really great mix of what the artstyle will come to be while still mainly having that older one piece charm, and oda definitally flexes his art skills more in this arc. also reference to the sunken continent?????? in my chapter 19?????

im going to stop short of showing pictures of the art and talking about it because i dont know art that well, and if you want that you should go watch tbskyen's best panel in every chapter of one piece series because he does a much better job of art analysis than i could ever do. i remember there being more i wanted to talk about but i cant remember them right now so im just gonna end on the note that this arc was really funny! i still really like the humour in modern one piece but i found myself laughing a lot more in this arc than ive laughed at one piece in quite some time!! to end, im just gonna put a page that i thought was really funny and had quite a good laugh at.

[ellitx]

Frailty | Kazuha x Reader

No matter how many times you've run away from your practices, Kazuha is always able to find you.

art belongs to rivaiiwah

word count: 1.8k

           Here you are with the cherry blossoms sprouting from the branches, looking to the casual eye as flowers until they bloom. Who pays attention to their chaotic stems that twist in the joy of new life until they wear colors that soothe the viewer’s perception.

           Then there they are in the air that becomes more welcoming each day, a community of colors, a feast for butterflies and bees. 

           A new beginning. 

           A little pink petal was plucked off from the group, letting it float alone in the air as it landed on your hand. Your eyes peered over the frond and lifted it up to the sunlight to observe the bright colors of it.

           “[Name]-sama, there you are.”

           You whipped your head and smiled at the caller when he approached you. “Kazuha? What brings you here?” You questioned as you fixed your hold on the parasol. His brows scrunched up and let out a sigh as he fixed the sleeve of his outfit. 

           “Ayaka-sama, was looking for you.”

           “Ane? Why’s that?” You questioned.

           He sighed once again and pinched your cheeks a bit harshly. “You need to practice your purification rituals. Your siblings are looking for you again and now they’re worried about you.”

           “Ah— Kazuha, that hurts…!” You grasped his hand to release his hold on your face, but to no avail, he won’t budge. Seconds later, he finally and slowly let go and spared your cheeks from reddening to which you rubbed it to alleviate the sharp pain.

           His gaze went to the blooming flower of cherry blossoms and watched how the wind fluttered the petals. Ruby gems have softened at the sight of the newly sprung tree before focusing on the young princess of Kamisato.

           Your name uttered from his lips making you arch a brow at him in puzzlement. His lips parted slightly and waited for a moment before asking. “I’m just wondering why are you here. There are sakura trees at your residence, though.” He stated as he scratched his cheek with his index finger.

           Your throat hummed and looked at the sky in wonder. “Ah that… I think you already know the answer to that.” He knew for sure he saw your eyes glinted in mischief when you looked at him. 

           That smirk plastered on your face didn’t go unnoticed by him. He was quiet for a minute making you giggle and stifle it with your hand. Kazuha groaned in flicked your head much to your surprise.

           “Ouch!”

           “I’m taking you back to the Kamisato residence whether you like it or not.” 

           “Kazuha!! No please—“

—

           “Oh my, it seems like he already found her.” The young mistress giggled and watched both of you entered through the main gate with the swordsman pushing you inside. You were writhing and shaking your arm, doing your best to escape from him.

           At the sight of your face, your brother’s smile widened, and quickly wore his geta and engulfed you in a bear hug. “[Name], where have you been?! I was worried sick when I saw you weren’t inside your room!” He screeched and cried hysterically before glaring at Kazuha.

           It sent a shiver down his spine before averting his gaze away from Ayato and squared his shoulders. “Hmph, I could’ve found her on my own, but the archon must have graced you to guide my little sister back home.” Your brother grumbled as he patted your head in an assuring manner. You heaved a sigh and mouthed a sorry to your friend which he just waved it off.

           Ayaka reached to where the three of you are and deeply bowed to Kazuha in thanks. “Thank you and sorry for bothering you to look for [Name]. We’ll be sure to compensate you greatly.” She remarked and motioned for him to come inside.

           “It’s fine, Ayaka-sama. I was just happy and relieved to know she didn’t stray too far from here.” He peeked at you from the corner of his eyes before looking back at your older sister.

           “You can drop the formalities. And also, aniki, you’re suffocating [Name].” She respired and pulled you away from Ayato’s loving hugs making you sigh in relief and thank her.

           He pouted and huffed before crossing his arms and narrowly eyed you. His nature quickly changed in a blink and you know for sure you’re in a trouble just the way he lightly frowned at you.

           “[Name].” Your body shivered and avoided looking at him as you cowered behind Kazuha. “Y-yes…?” You muttered softly and tightly gripped on his clothes. 

           “Why did you skipped practicing?” You gulped down your fear and sheepishly smiled at Ayato, trying to think of an excuse. 

           “Well, it’s spring! You know how much I love sakura flowers and watch them bloom before me, aniki!” A peal of tense laughter slipped from your mouth and nudged Kazuha asking for help. Your [eye color] eyes were pleadingly gazed upon his for help as you shook his arm lightly to get him to understand your gestures.

           Sighing for an umpteenth time on this day. He faced Ayato sternly making him pause when he saw Kazuha’s face got darker. A bead of sweat rolled down his temples yet never faltering his stare onto him.

           “Ayato-sama, just lock the door if she ever escapes again.” Kazuha’s eyes returned back to their usual light and grabbed you by your shoulders, placing you in front. His fingers pointed at you and then grinned slyly at you.

           Your eyes widened but before you could open your mouth to speak out, his words made you stopped in your tracks and your face paled while your lips were parted a bit. “If she does run away again, don’t hesitate to call me. I’ll make sure she does her practices frequently.”

           The cunning smile glued on his pretty face made you scared. From the other’s perspective he seemed like an innocent and nice teen, but for you, oh you know that smile very well. He didn’t want to indulge in your escapades and he’s going to pay you back with his own mischievousness. 

    —

           “Sein!”

           You threw a talisman onto the dummy as your index and middle finger were stick together and the rest were closed. “Sein?” Kazuha’s brow raised in bewilderment at your chant and stared at the dummy. He was expecting something would happen but sadly there was none.

           It only stood still, remaining unchanging. “[Name], it’s read as sho-shi-tsu.” Ayaka said as she removed the piece of paper on the figurine. “And isn’t sein something you would hear in Mondstadt?” 

           Your lips formed a grin as your optics shined brightly in excitement. “Sein sounds way cooler than shoshitsu!” A strong impact was thrown on your head making you cry in pain and place your hand on it protectively.

           “[Name]-sama, please take this seriously.” Kazuha exhaled through his nose and stretched your cheeks making you whine even more at the increasing pain. Ayaka laughed lightly at the sight of you two as she took the brush from your hands.

           “I guess we can practice next time, is that alright with you? I still have to practice my sword fight with Tohama.” Ayaka awaited your response while she kept the materials back to their rightful place.

           You merely giggled and shoved her playfully. “It’s fine~ Have a nice date with him!” Her face flushed and her silver eyes widened in surprise as she continuously stuttered. 

           “I-it’s not a date!”

           “Right, right.” You pushed her out of the room and gave her a hug before closing the door gently. You leaned your body against it and heaved a sigh at the exhausting purification practices.

           It really tired your mind and body so much. Even though you joke around sometimes to loosen up that stiff body of yours, you know you still need to work hard on it because of your duty as a shrine maiden. 

           Purifications are much needed and required in the Kamisato house. Ayaka has already mastered everything from arts to music and even poetry, and yet here you are, not even having the slightest talent like her to accomplish such things.

          Ayaka is the embodiment of perfection and nobleness, there's no doubt about that. Her form is even more elegant than yours and how she handles tea ceremonies more delicately unlike you who somehow still spills the tea from nervousness no matter how much you've practiced mastering it.

           It really tired you out how they expect so many things for you. 

           Being noble is really hard.

           The anemo-user noticed your destitute appearance and slowly approached you. 

           “[Name]-sama?” 

           You snapped out from your deep thoughts and shakily looked at him. “O-oh, Kazuha. I forgot you were still here…” You coughed and fixed your outfit, giving him a curious glance and asked.

           “Is something the matter?” 

           “I should be the one asking you that. It seems like something’s troubling you.”

                      His brows furrowed in worry and took a closer look at your well-being. “It’s nothing. I’m just glad I don’t have to practice anymore, it really tired me out. Ugh…” You grumbled and rested your hand on your stomach when you felt it rumbled.

           “Do you want to eat outside?” Your ears perked up and nodded eagerly like a child. For a second, you thought you saw him smile before it quickly disappeared. He offered his hand to you which you gladly accepted as he lead you to the exit of the room.

           “Kazuha’s treating me~” You sang joyfully, thinking of the foods from the stalls. Or maybe he’ll treat you to eat at a restaurant? Just thinking of it made your stomach growled even more from hungriness and excitement, imagining that freshly cooked takoyakis or even those crispy golden-brown tempuras.

           Even with all the smiles and laugh you give off, he can’t help but be bothered that you’re hiding something. You always shake off whenever he asks if you’re fine or if you needed anything.

           He wished that you could rely on him and trust him, to tell him all the troubles that have been piling up inside you. He has known you for a long time now, and yet why can’t you open up to him some more?

           If maybe, just maybe— one day he’ll be able to finally tell you how he feels. He’ll even go as far as looking for you if you escaped once more. He hopes you’ll notice the signs he’s been giving that he’s there for you and you don’t have to bottle it up.

           He wants to tell you that it’s alright to cry and feel vulnerable. He’ll love everything about you, even your own imperfections.

           Just the way you accepted and love everything about himself.

did i just write for an unreleased genshin chara? yes, yes i did, and im ready to simp for him

[mankaithings]

Miyoshi Kazunari

Kazunari was nine years old 

It was the first time somebody from his class invited him to a party so he was really excited! He looked around the room, a smile suddenly growing onto his face as he watched everybody greet the birthday boy a happy birthday and hand him his gifts and join the others in the ball pit to play. Around him, everyone was laughing while they all throw balls at each other, running around and having no care in the world

He joined the others upon singing happy birthday, clapping his hands and following the rhythm of the song until the birthday boy finally blew his candles. Everybody cheered as the fire went out and once again everybody was having fun

Kazunari decided that, he also wanted to have a birthday party 

Kazunari turned ten

He did everything for his birthday. He asked his parents if they can give him a party which they agreed on. He even made the invitations himself! He was really proud of his work, at a young age he already had exemplary skills for art and seeing how his invitation turned out made him even prouder of his talent.

 As he handed out the invitation, Kazunari felt excitement bubbling in the pit of his stomach. It was the first time he was going to spend it with so many people, he was even imagining the games they would play for the day! Maybe through the party, he could get closer to the kids in his class? Then he wouldn’t have to feel lonely anymore 

By the day of his birthday, everything was ready. The streamers that he helped made were hung up on the wall, accompanying the banner that said ‘Happy Birthday Kazu!!!’, the food was cooked and Kazunari wore his best clothes. Out of excitement, he waited by the entrance of his house until somebody decided to turn up

But nobody did 

From that day as he sang himself happy birthday and blew the candles, Kazunari decided that he didn’t need a party or even a gift. He just wants to be greeted a happy birthday by his friend and he would be content and happy 

The remaining years of elementary and three years of middle school yet nobody remembered his birthday. He couldn’t help but feel jealous as he watched both girls and boys greet their friends with a happy birthday and run to them with a hug or invite them out to karaoke or surprise them whenever the special day came 

Kazunari entered highschool 

He changed himself completely. He wore cooler clothes, updated his vocabulary and even became more extroverted in hopes of making friends and it did happen! He was always in the middle of his group of friends and the one to start the fun!

His birthday came and he had high expectations for it. He does have friends so there’s no problem if he gets excited by it, right? 

But despite the number of ‘friends’ he had only a few remembered to greet him a happy birthday. Maybe it was because he was always focused on making the other party laugh and never actually talk about himself or anything personal that had to do with him that nobody remembered it, but he had expectations and once again, he was disappointed 

By nineteen he found a family, he was turning twenty and after ten whole years he finally learned his lesson. He wasn’t even sure if anybody remembered or if they even knew it was his birthday 

Kazunari shook his head and headed down his bed, ready to start his day. He was happy enough that he found people who he could call his real friends 

The first ones to greet him were Omi, Izumi, Tsumugi and Tasuku and Homare

“Ah mornin’ Omimi, director, Tax, Tsumu-tsumu, Aririn.” He greeted the group merrily who sat among themselves discussing their plans for the day 

“Ah morning Kazunari, here you go.” Omi handed him a plate which was filled with his scrumptious breakfast

“Woah Omimi is this from a five star restaurant?” Kazunari asked, staring at the plate of neatly stacked pancakes that was neatly drenched in honey with whip cream and blueberries on top. He couldn’t help but take out his phone and snap a pic of the perfect instablamable food in front of him

“Well I thought it was a good way to start your birthday,” Omi smiled softly at Kazunari

Kazunari was caught off guard, so they did know it was his birthday. For once he was left speechless, he felt his chest swell with happiness at the thought of somebody actually thinking and making something for him 

“Happy birthday Kazunari,” Izumi greeted the art student energetically and ruffled his hair, “ You actually turned older today.” She smiled at him fondly as she handed him his usual mug of coffee, “You might need that for today,” Izumi advised 

“Thanks,” Kazunari looked down on his food, feeling bashful. 

“Happy birthday Kazunari,” Tsumugi said, “I’ll try to arrange the flowers later so you’ll be able to take a picture for your instablam.” Tsumugi suggested 

“Thanks Tsumu-tsumu!” 

“Miyoshi, happy birthday.” Tasuku said but despite the few words Kazunari beamed at him making the older actor’s mouth twitch up

“Ah for this special day I have made a special poem just for you Kazunari!” Homare announced proudly 

Kazunari spent his morning filled with laughter as he dug in to his food and listened to Homare’s poem, sure he got confused by a few verses but it was the thought that counts 

“Ah you’re finally finished,” Yuki’s voice cut through the adults as he walked in the dining area. “Everybody’s waiting in the lounge so hurry up Friendly mcExtrovert.” Yuki said and left the adults 

Kazunari looked at the adults in pure confusion but they just smiled among themselves and continued with their meal

“Kazu~” Misumi was the first to greet him as he went towards his friend and gave him a small hug, “Happy birthday Kazu!” He smiled

“Kazu-kun happy birthday,” Muku followed with his usual cute smile

Kazunari couldn’t help but laugh, “Thanks guys!” He said as he placed an arm around the two, “Oh Tenten’s also here,” He said, surprised. “I thought you have your own schedule for today?”

“Well…” Tenma trailed off, feeling embarrassed at the question

“He cleared it for today,” Yuki answered for Tenma who glared at him

“I just wanted a break, okay?” He looked at Kazunari, “Ha-happy birthday.” He muttered loud enough for Kazunari to hear

“Thanks Tenten, Yuki too.” He grinned at Yuki who remained silent. Kazunari wondered how many thanks he already said and it wasn’t even afternoon but he just wanted to show his gratitude to them who was actually making an effort for his birthday

“Come on let’s go!” Misumi ran outside, leaving the other troupe members no choice but to follow the free spirited actor

“I told him to wait for us,” Yuki sighed, running after the actor,

“Sumi wait up!” Kazunari called after Misumi who abruptly stopped and grinned at his fellow actors who were all out of breath 

“Sorry~ I got too excited!” Misumi apologized and went beside Kazunari

“Kazu let’s go find triangles!” 

Kazunari laughed, “Yeah let’s go!”

“Geh we should’ve just waited in the park.” Yuki looked at Tenma who was avoiding his eyes 

“How was I supposed to know it was going to turn out like this?!” 

“G-guys they’re getting away!” Muku went in between Yuki and Tenma pointing at Kazunari and Misumi who were already meters away from them 

“Hurry up hack,” Yuki ignored Tenma who yelled indignantly upon hearing the word hack leave Yuki’s mouth 

While the summer troupe busied themselves to make sure Kazunari had fun for the afternoon, everybody in the dorm worked for the evening party

“Come on Kazu! There’s a triangle here!” Misumi called up from the tree branch

“Sumi I can’t climb trees!” Kazunari called from below while Yuki and Tenma were beside Kazunari and catching their breaths 

“Oh there’s one there!” Muku pointed at the other side which Misumi easily jumped onto

“Kazu I’ll get you the best triangle!” Misumi grinned from below them, “So you’ll feel very happy today!”

Kazunari wanted to tell him that he didn’t need to. He was already happy with spending time with everybody 

“Thanks Sumi!” He grinned at Misumi who also smiled widely and continued to look for triangles from the tree

“That was dangerous.” Tenma commented after hours of searching for triangles, “Besides why would you take a traffic cone?!” He turned to Misumi, it was a good thing that there wasn’t any police or he didn’t want to even think about the consequences that they would have to face

But Kazunari didn’t mind if he spend his birthday in jail, if he was with his friends he thinks he could do it

“It was the biggest triangle!” 

“Still…” Tenma trailed off while Kazunari laughed

“Don’t sweat it Tenten!” He placed an arm around the highschool boy’s shoulder, “We’re here to have fun!” 

Tenma looked at Kazunari’s bright face and looked away, “Fine whatever.” He muttered while they all followed Misumi and Muku who were talking about today’s collection infront of them towards the park. It was the reason why they decided to head out anyways, to make sure that Kazunari haves fun

“Welcome Kazu!” Misumi spreads out his arms as he presents the picnic set out for him 

Kazunari could only stare in surprise, he thought they were still looking for triangles and besides, he wasn’t even expecting anything like this well, it’s not like he expected anything 

“Oi Friendly mcExtrovert are you just going to stand there?” Yuki cut off his thoughts as he sat down on the blanket laid on the ground, “Hurry up, we’re all hungry from that hunt.”

“‘Kay Yukki~” He basically skipped towards his four troupe members who were all waiting for him before they start eating 

“Woah this is totes so cute!” He praised as he took out the cupcakes and other foods from the basket 

“Hehe thanks,” Muku scratched his chin, “I helped Omi-san bake those.” He smiled widely, “B-but I’m not sure how it would taste.”

“Tastes good Mukkun!” He complimented the middle schooler as he took a bite after taking a picture of it. Muku smiled widely and nodded, also grabbing a piece of his own

“Should you be eating dessert first?” Tenma asked, grabbing a bento that they also made in the morning even before Kazunari wakes up

“Wah! You all helped make these?” Kazunari gasped in amazement 

“We did, hack almost burnt the whole kitchen.” Yuki pointed at Tenma who choked on his food and turned bright red

“Sh-shut up it’s not like I often cook!” He argued 

“Let’s head to the mall afterwards,” Yuki ignored Tenma who sulked, “There’s a sale and the hacks paying for what you want.” Yuki pointed at Tenma who just sighed and rolled his eyes 

“Really?” Kazunari once more asked in surprised, “Tenten you don’t have to-”

“It’s my gift, okay?” He looked away, his cheeks turning a light shade of red, “I wasn’t sure of what you wanted so this will be my gift.” He mumbled and focused his attention on the meat in his bento 

“Tenten…” Kazunari trailed off, no wonder the guy was always gazing at Kazunari the past few weeks and muttering to himself, he was thinking of potential gifts for him! But really, Kazunari was okay in whatever Tenma gets him, just like he said, it’s the thought that counts 

“Hurry up, alright! We have to get back-” Tenma didn’t get to finish whatever he was going to say for Yuki gave him a look that shut him up

Kazunari shrugged, and continued eating his meal as he listened to Misumi talk to the cats 

They got the idea that it was going to be chaotic, Misumi would run off once he sees a triangle (He almost did but stopped mid run and smiled at Kazunari) Yuki and Tenma would be arguing (They are but not as loudly as in the dorms) and thankfully Muku stayed as angelic as he is 

“Kazunari-kun, I think this would look great on you.” Muku pointed a hat inside a store, “Right Yuki-kun?” Muku turned to Yuki who stopped and thought about it 

“It does go with your usual outfits.” He nodded, “Do you want it?” 

Kazunari smiled, it was true that he already saw so much stuff already but he was enjoying himself more as the summer troupe hang out, with the usual noise with everybody in the troupe as they walked along store by store 

“We should head home by six.” Tenma looked at his watch, 

“Eh? That’s way too early Tenten!” Kazunari pouted 

“We’ll eat with everyone!” Misumi bursted out excitedly, “Director cooked curry!” He beamed as the other grimaced at the mention of curry for dinner that they already had the previous night and the night before 

“Okay, should I go for the hat? Maybe the shirt earlier?” Kazunari thought out loud, “Yukki what do you think would make girls go crazy?” Kazunari winked at Yuki who just sighed

“Buy all, the hack’s paying.” Yuki shrugged but Tenma argued

“Do I look like someone who picks money on trees?!”

“Hah? You make more money than all the company combined!” Yuki countered as they continued to argue in the middle of the mall, thankfully Tenma was wearing a disguise

“Besides why would he buy a shirt you already made him one!” Tenma’s voice rang, Kazunari blinked. Once again surprised at the revelation 

“Yukki made me a shirt?” He mumbled, slowly as if he was trying to decipher the simple sentence to himself. He knew the workload Yuki had as the designer for the whole company yet the thought that he still managed to make time to make him something… 

Yuki glared at Tenma and turned his head to the side, “What about it?”

“Nothing, thanks Yukki!” Kazunari grinned sheepishly, “Should I just get the hat then?” 

“Add the coat from earlier,” Yuki advised, “The color would look good together,” 

“But…” Kazunari trailed off as Tenma took out his wallet, he didn’t even need to use a card he just took out cash from his wallet like it was nothing

Perks of being rich 

“It doesn’t even cost that much,” Tenma said

“Show off.” Yuki commented which sparked another argument between the two which went on until they paid for the clothes 

“Ah today was so much fun!” Kazunari grinned as he walked beside Muku who nodded

“I’m glad to know you enjoyed today Kazunari-kun.” 

“Ah we’re almost there!” Misumi basically ran towards the dorm 

“We should’ve taken the car,” Tenma muttered

“Shut up if you didn’t get lost we would be home earlier.” 

Kazunari chuckled at the banter as he followed Misumi through the door and entered

“Wah it’s really quiet, did everyone leave?” Kazunari commented, he wasn’t going to say it out loud but he felt disappointed, he guess he was looking forward to partying with everyone

Their little group went towards the lounge and suddenly the lights turned on and he was faced with everyone wearing a party hat, a colorful banner behind them that screamed “HAPPY BIRTHDAY KAZU!!!” and food lined along the table as everyone in the company stood behind it with huge smiles on their faces as they waited for Kazunari to reach them and blow the candles 

Kazunari felt the corner of his eyes brim with tears, wiping them away he smiled widely and walked towards everybody that was waiting for him

Kazunari turned twenty 

It was the day he was already expecting everything to be minimal, but at twenty he finally got to have a birthday party, filled with food and laughter as everyone enjoyed themselves through the party. At twenty Kazunari’s childhood dream finally got granted, he was spending his special day with the people he can proudly call his family

[jupiterdrcps]

“maybe there aren't any such things as good friends or bad friends - maybe there are just friends, people who stand by you when you're hurt and who help you feel not so lonely. maybe they're always worth being scared for, and hoping for, and living for. maybe worth dying for too, if that's what has to be. no good friends. no bad friends. only people you want, need to be with; people who build their houses in your heart.”

It, Stephen King. 

[ link to playlist. ]

( there is a letter written and signed by malia jaiden next to a big board of photographs. ) 

I’m not a creative person, art was never something I was good at. I think I barely scraped by in art class but this is my effort at trying to explain the valley. What makes it beautiful, what makes it sad, what makes it good, what makes it home.

My mom wasn’t raised in the valley like I was, her mother had come here on vacations, claiming that they had the best produce here because it was somehow grown with love, and that the people treated you like you were family. When my parents met they were teenagers, reckless, in love, and found their way to the valley on a whim having remembered her mother had brought her here to the many festivals when she was a child.

My mom and father had eventually ended up in Zuzu City, my mother going to school to become a teacher, she found herself often coming to the valley on weekends, she made friends with a lot of locals, she looked at the houses that were vacant, often imagining a life here. She told my father her dreams, and by the time that my mom finished her first semester of college they found out that they were pregnant with me. It took them about eight months to secure a house in the valley, when I asked how they managed to do it, my mother said it was a different time back then, that the locals of the valley were good people, they gave my father a steady job, while my mom struggled to finish college. 

They were young, but they made it work, not on their own, but because the people in the valley cared. 

The house that I grew up in wasn’t just something that my mom stumbled upon because of luck, it was because people cared, it was built on love and trust that eventually, maybe someday, my mom would be able to repay all of that back but also knowing that she didn’t have to. 

When I say that I love the valley it’s because I love my mom. 

To me, she was the heart and soul of the valley. She made me love it for what it was, taking me on walks with her to cindersap forest, signing me up for anything that the community center had to offer. I wasn’t raised just by my mother, I was raised by a group of people because they loved my mother, and I guess loved me because I was just an extension of her. 

She was a kind soul that somehow blended in perfectly into the valley, making herself useful when needed. Eventually, when she finished college, she became the teacher here, I don’t remember but there would be photos that she would show me of me on her lap as she taught class in the library. Slowly those photos would morph into me being in her class as a student.

No longer was my mother a stranger to the valley she started to grow old with it, too. 

When my mother lost her memory, she would look over at me like I was a stranger, because to her I was, and tell me stories of my childhood here. She used to say that the valley was probably the best part of her life because she got to raise her daughter here. She would show me photos of myself, pointing out all the friends that had left the valley to become someone, neighbours who still dropped by to visit my mom, farmers that gave us produce. She might have lost her memories but the valley remained.

Sometimes I wonder what part of my mother’s story ends and where mine begins. 

I think I’m still figuring that out. I think I’m still living in my mother’s shadow too afraid of stepping out of it, maybe because people won’t like what they see, because I’m not her. I’m not kind like she was, I’m not gentle, or outwardly caring. 

But I still see things, things that she would have noticed, but through my own lens now because this isn’t her story anymore, it’s mine. 

For Malia’s “art piece” there is a big board full of photos dated back from 1993 of the valley. 

The left of the board is the older photos, of her mother talking to locals taken by her father, photos taken by her mother of her daily walks through cindersap forest and through pelican town. As you start to get to the middle of the collage you start to see familiar faces, photos of Malia, Jillian, Koa, Sasha as children, playing in each other’s yards, in some photos there’s party hats, questionable fashion, all the oddities of growing up in the valley; parents smiling, photos of children holding hands, petting farm animals that have long since passed, celebrating birthdays, laughing at festivals, mourning at funerals, new flowers blooming in places that they shouldn’t but allowing them to anyway. 

There’s photos of children in the valley playing outside of the library, it’s spring in some photos, purple and pink flowers spread across the field shifting into summer where you see colourful hats, shorts and t-shirts, festivals of the summertime, photos of families camping, there’s fishing, holding up a tiny trout so high because at that age everything is so big and exciting, happy parents with sun hats and too much sunscreen. The photos shift to fall, there’s soft orange leaves, photos of puddles around the town, horses drinking from them while children jump in them. 

The photos are not glamorous or artistic, they were taken in the moment by Malia to remember that there’s joy in the small things. 

Once you start shifting towards the middle near the right side of the board more familiar faces start to show up. The class of 2013 at a house party, the photos are blurry but the memories still stay the same, there’s a photo of the house where the photos were taken in, it’s vacant now, but someone still keeps the garden alive, preserving the life that was left in their wake. The photos age as class of 2013 does—watching Sasha perform at a talent show, Jillian skating on the ice, Malia running on a trail, Koa on his first day as an apprentice. 

When the class of 2013 graduates, the photos of them become less and less, people move away. There’s a blank space that’s meant to be purposeful in the board, and then, the photos start again. 

Spring time, there’s a woman, with her back to the photographer, she’s standing in a garden surrounded by flowers that she planted years ago, they’ve come and gone every year, in the photo you can see the woman reach out to touch a petal. To the untrained eye you wouldn’t know that it was Malia’s mother. It’s the only photo she has of her during this time in Malia’s life on the board. 

There’s photos of the saloon, they’re never concise, blurry because they weren’t meant to be taken, accidental photos showing people talking to each other in the valley, most who have known each other their whole lives. 

There’s photos of outside the saloon, it’s dark, and on the ground is ash and stubbed cigarettes from Saloon patrons and Malia. 

Moon photos are not easy to take, Malia is not a photographer but on a particular full moon she takes a photo of the sky, because despite the grief of not being able to leave the valley, there was something special about full moons here. They seemed bigger, brighter with the stars surrounding it. 

There’s new ranchers in town, Malia takes a photo of what their farm looks like before they’ve made something of it. 

There’s photos of camping during the summer, young adults gathered by a fire, laughter fills the air, and smoke lingers on their clothes for days to come, reminding you of a moment you’ve already lost. There’s photos of people helping other people putting on bug spray, helping setting up tents, coolers being stored in a bear safe compartment, there’s smiling in photos of future partners and companions, friendships formed over a fire and marshmallows, the moon reflects on the lake, though the photo would never do the memory justice. 

A concert rolls into town bringing a large entourage, Malia takes photos of all the equipment brought and set up, the night of the concert she tries to take a photograph of everyone who attended, there’s too many people to try and take a picture of, but one thing remains and it’s people’s enjoyment and love for music, it helps people connect in the same way that photos do. When the show is over, there’s a group of locals who help clean up the mess, smiling at each other and singing along to a song from a girl who once lived in the valley and made something of themselves. 

Malia takes a photo of the poster, she tacks on the photo with class of 2013.  

Photos of the beach are taken after the concert has rolled in and left, leaving only the locals to clean up the mess that was made. There’s a before photo of the trash laid across the beach, children helping their parents pick up trash with big beach hats, there’s photos of games being made of it, who can pick up the most cans, older adults joining in on the fun too. The point of the photos isn’t to show the mess that people can make, but of what people can accomplish if they work together.

When the beach gets cleaned, it’s sunset, the sky a pink and orange on a warm summer night. 

Community festivities come and go, Malia takes photos of all of them. 

But, near the end of the board, you start to see more familiar faces. 

There’s a photo of a clinic, inside is Ben looking down at paperwork that needs to be filled out after each patient, Malia has come over to help but it’s a slow day. When he looks up he’s smiling, Malia has caught him off guard and tried to say a funny joke that wasn’t all that funny but Ben laughs at it anyway. Malia would never tell him how much the clinic had been a safe place for her because he was there when her mother was sick. She hopes that he can see that now through the photos of the clinic she’s taken over time. 

There’s a photo outside of Henry’s house, different sets of photos, some of him gardening, some of them of him holding his chickens, there’s one of him and daisy holding hands, and one of him sitting on his couch with Malia right next to him. His home has always been a safe space because he is a safe space. She knows that Henry has been having a tough time lately and hopes that the photos remind him that there can be sunshine again if you let it. 

There’s photos of Jillian throughout their childhood, reminding her that before she was a skater she was just a kid that stayed up way too late at sleepovers and ate way too much junk food when they shouldn’t have. Malia puts photos of her winning her first trophy, nailing her first double axel, too many photos of them in hotel rooms jumping on the beds, a photo of her at her tenth birthday party, and one sneaky photo of Jillian outside of the General Store when they reopened. Her face is relaxed. Malia hopes that the photos can remind her that it’s never too late to start again. 

There’s photos of Koa as his first day as an apprentice, Malia has taken plenty of photos of Koa when he’s in the middle of making something beautiful out of nothing, and photos of pure joy when he’s finished with a project. Malia puts photos of all of his birthdays that she’s attended, her arms around him in a hug after a track meet and seeing him amongst the crowd of people. Koa had always been someone that was always there, whenever you needed him, and over the past couple of years Malia hadn’t been very good at keeping track of him. But there’s a photo that she took when they went sledding in the winter time, behind the camera she was laughing, which is why the photo is so shaky, but she knows that he’ll appreciate it anyway. 

There’s photos of Sasha, at numerous talent shows, singing at birthday parties, at sleepovers with Jillian. There’s photos of them at house parties, karaoke night, photos of them as children climbing trees with arms around each other. There’s a photo of Malia in Zuzu city with a copy of Sasha’s first album. They weren’t talking then, but she wanted to buy it anyway. Malia knows that they hadn’t been friends in a very long time but hopes the photos show that despite everything, she does still care for Sasha. 

There’s photos of Finley taken after Malia and Finley jumped off the pier. A start of a new friendship over wine and laughter. Malia finds it funny that after years of being rivals they were friends now. Drunken late night photos of blurry faces, up close photos that weren’t meant to be taken. Photos of both of them on runs, photos of when they temporarily worked together. Photos taken at the saloon arguing over what song to play next. There’s a photo of Finley at the saloon with their friends, Malia had taken it thinking that maybe they would want to see it someday, surrounded by people who loved them, that maybe after all this time, Finley finally found what they were looking for here in the valley. 

There’s a photo that Malia’s mom took of Elaine and Malia outside, Elaine is showing Malia what her and her grandfather plan on doing with their house, Malia is young and wanted to learn and understand, probably asking way too many questions, ever so noisy and talkative. There’s a photo of Malia smiling up at Elaine, she doesn’t remember what was said but she remembers how it feels. There’s another photo of Elaine and her grandfather taken from a window of both of them measuring wood together, her grandfather is telling Elaine the measurements and Elaine has a very determined look on her face. Malia has one last photo of Elaine, it was taken after Elaine dropped off food for Malia, she’s standing in her mother’s garden and the sun hit her just right. Malia likes to think that it wasn’t just a coincidence, light will always outshine the darkness. 

There’s photos of Kiran at his farm, Malia snapping as many awkward photos of Kiran that she can feeding the animals. Many of the photos are blurry due to Kiran trying to grab the phone from Malia’s hand. It’s an unlikely friendship founded on grief and loss, an understanding that though the people that we love are gone, it doesn’t mean that there can’t be happy moments in between. 

There’s photos of Sloane’s van, the very first time that Malia saw it. It was before Malia got to know fae, but after a while, a friendship formed, Malia often coming to see what Sloane had in store, Malia often taking pictures of fae in faer element. Sloane had always looked ethereal to Malia, untouchable in many ways, the photos never really did fae justice, but Malia hopes Sloane sees how mysterious yet magical faer is. 

There’s a photo of Archie in Malia’s house, a single photo of her in her mother’s room that she hasn’t opened since she died. There’s equipment set up on a chair that Malia had brought in from the dining room, Malia hadn’t wanted the room to be touched too much, just examined, to be heard if there was anything in there. If her mom was in there, waiting for her or anyone to listen to her. Malia didn’t know why she took the photo, maybe in case if something were to happen then she’d have evidence of it. But in the end there was nothing, Archie had told her that her mother wasn’t here, and Malia had nodded her head that day. After that, she had taken a photo of Archie and Henry in the kitchen, talking about something that Malia couldn’t remember now, but there was a sense of belonging in the kitchen, that maybe Archie had found her space here in the valley that was beyond something more than ghosts. 

There’s photos of Lizzie and Art’s farm. She tacks the photo that she took of it before it had become something. There’s another photo of their wooden sign that displays when the farm was established, photos of all the crops that had flourished, the chickens that run around the farm, and the stacks of wood left over from winter. There’s touches of them everywhere signifying that they are part of the community of farmers in the valley, that this was home. 

There’s photos taken after the mines, when she had been sitting down on a rock, watching people come together to try and help anyone that was hurt and hungry. She remembers their faces of each one that had been there on the front lines: Adria with food, Anya with Gabe lending a helping hand where they could. To them, it might not have seemed like a lot, but to Malia it was everything. 

There’s photos of Sofia in the winter, outside of the library looking up at the snow that was falling. Malia had often found herself walking towards the library in the winter, it had always been her mother’s favourite time of year. She remembers all the times that her mother let the kids go out and play in the snow, thinking of the pure joy on other kids faces. There’s this certain look that Sofia gets, watching the children, that reminds Malia of her mother. The admiration of watching a new generation of children growing up in the valley, knowing that she was in the heart of all of it at the library. 

There’s photos of Matty, taken by Malia in the middle of pelican town, she had been sitting on a bench smoking when she had seen Matty come rolling in on his skateboard, they hadn’t seen each other since the mines and Malia had asked if he had been doing okay. She took photos of him on his skateboard asking him to do tricks for her, always wanting to get into it but never being able to due to her being on the track team. There’s a photo that she takes when he’s explaining the trick to her, she doesn’t understand it but she loves how passionate he gets about it, how passionate Matty gets about anything that he loves, it doesn’t go unnoticed. 

The last few photos are taken on valentines day at the saloon. Malia had never really celebrated valentine’s day before, deciding that it was mostly a holiday for brands to profit off of, but over the last few years she had begun to celebrate it in her own way, thinking of all those people that she had loved in her past and in the present. All the people that have come and gone in her life, all that people that she knew, and all the people that she hadn’t even met yet. The last couple of photos are snapshots of the night. Jemma and Arden talking animatedly about something while drinking a cocktail that Jemma made, there’s Iris and Sasha to the side looking at a song to sing on stage, Zola curiously looking over at the jukebox of what song to pick, Dakota deep in conversation with Elaine about a subject he’s passionate about, and Malia, in the middle of it all with her glass in hand. 

(Later, Malia will come back to the saloon to be greeted by a dog wagging its tail with a man trailing not too far behind her.) 

The last photo on the board is a sign that says WELCOME TO STARDEW VALLEY! 

The sun is setting just right on the sign. This was home. 

[jcmorrigan]

Hey, wanna watch me cry? I found my old “KHIII wishlist” and let’s tick off how many things I got and how many things make me cry

·      Mozenrath as the secret boss - Yeah, I always knew this one was a long shot, but a girl’s gotta have a dream, you know?

·      Kairi being a complete and total badass - *LOUD SOBBING*

·      Guest stars from Square Enix properties besides FF and TWEWY (Ringabel would be really cool in the Restoration Committee) - I mean I guess there was a Gummi boss from another older game? Truth be told I think I just wanted Ringabel. I haven’t even played BD. I just like him because a friend likes him. Anyway, Squenix might be able to win back my heart again if Orpheus from BD2 ends up a boss but I don’t see that happening

·      Bring back Strike Raid and give it the EXACT same mechanic as KH1 - YOU HAD ONE JOB but I can’t be too mad because Attraction Flows are pretty

·      Terra gets his confidence restored - Hey, this one happened!

·      Eraqus gets called out on his bullshit - *SOBBING INCREASES IN VOLUME*

·      Ventus is just awesome - This one made it!

·      The return of Xion - YEAH BOIIIIII

·      And Roxas and Naminé but Xion takes priority - Hmmmmm. Okay, so we did get this, but Naminé was such an afterthought and didn’t get to play a plot role. Does it really count?

·      The ability to make a Gummi ship that looks like the Condor from Storm Hawks - Given the blueprints that exist, I’m SURE this is possible. I’m just never actually patient enough with the Gummi system to play around with it. But maybe one day I will, for shits and giggles, try to RECREATE CONDOR

·      Even actually being evil and continuing to be a snarky little shit - HE HAD US IN THE FIRST HALF. THEN *BREAKS DOWN CRYING*

·      Ienzo reforming and having an awkward friend dynamic with Kairi as he goes through his redemption arc - I mean, we were missing the Kairi dynamic, but I got this much!

·      Baymax as a Summon - Party member, not Summon, but we did get to team up with Baymax and I’m cool with that.

·      Actual brunette Rapunzel post-haircut at some point - Got her!

·      Hans and Demyx appearing in the same game - I CANNOT BELIEVE OF ALL THE THINGS ON THIS WISHLIST, THIS IS ONE OF THE ONES THAT CAME TRUE. I CAN’T BE TOO MAD

·      Return trips to Agrabah and Halloween Town (I don’t care that we’ve already been there 500 times; I never get tired of Al and Jack) - CRUSH MY DREAMS WHY DON’T’CHA

·      MORE DISNEY VILLAIN BOSS FIGHTS! - There were. Decidedly fewer Disney villain boss fights. But they did finally let me beat up the goddamn Kraken so I’ll take it

·      I know this one’s a long shot but a Monsters Inc. world SOLELY for the purpose of a Randall Boggs boss fight where he can turn invisible and shake your lock-on ability and you just have to guess where he is before he punches out half your HP - WHAT DO YOU KNOW. WE GOT THIS WORLD BUT NOT THE FIGHT. BUT RANDALL WAS STILL GREAT AND GOT TO DO THE DEATH TRAP GAUNTLET AND IT WAS LEGITIMATELY THE BEST PART OF THE ENTIRE GAME (well, okay, maybe not BEST, just...my favorite)

·      Also a Dr. Facilier boss fight needs to be singled out - Oh Facilier where art thou

·      Make the adorable Dream Eaters relevant somewhere - This was on me; all I said was “somewhere.” They put in the minimal effort to check this box and I should’ve specified I wanted them to be MORE THAN AN OPTIONAL SUMMON

·      Yen Sid with an actual Keyblade - I retract this because the Yen Sid moment we got instead was SO MUCH COOLER

·      Actually being able to travel to the Destiny Islands to do stuff instead of it being an intro or cutscene-only world - Let us access the forbidden islands Squenix

·      Expanded Twilight Town map (the spinoffs gave us expanded maps for Radiant Garden and Traverse Town) - HAHAHAHAHA. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA HAHAHAHAHAHA

·      If Arendelle is a world and Elsa isn’t your party member, I want Anna to be hitting things with Kristoff’s guitar and that to be listed as her default weapon - Well, apparently we got frickin Marshmallow instead

·      Callaghan - No, I guess it was more important to fight DARKUBES

·      The return of every single leitmotif - BUT THIS ONE, WE GOT! Maybe missing a couple of the lesser ones, but almost EVERY piece Shimomura knocked out of the park came back and got badass new remixes! KHIII is altogether a mixed bag but its soundtrack is just aces.

·      Cruella de Vil - Fortunately she would get an antihero!AU origin story movie two years later that would kick all kinds of ass. As for KH, no, she’s still not there

·      The Emperor’s New Groove - They legitimately don’t want us to have anything nice

·      Mad Madam Mim, preferably to be introduced in Radiant Garden to oppose the Restoration Committee and Merlin just being fed up through the roof with this and Cid accusing Merlin of leading her here because SHE’S YOUR GODDAMN RIVAL - THEY DON’T WANT US TO HAVE. ANYTHING NICE

[eventidespirits]

Adam Allistair Freemont

Aliases: Edwin Lockhart, William Silva, Francis LaRue, Everett Brighton, James Fenwick

Apparent Age: "29"

Birthday: August 11th, 1897

Death Day: December 19th, 1926

Species: Vampire (Siren Bloodline)/Bloodbound Spirit

Gender: Cis Man

Pronouns: he/him

Sexuality: Primarily Heterosexual

Occupation: Photographer

Residence: Santa Marta, California; Morgan Kendrick's Psychic Realm

Universe: Primarily original lore but also Vampire the Masquerade where he's a Camarilla Toreador who defected to the Sabbat.

Appearance:

Height: 6'0

Build: Tall and lanky with angular shoulders and long limbs. He has a trim, lightly muscled physique with long delicate fingers and soft hands.

Eye Color: Luminous Yellow/Gold with slitted cat-like pupils and a darker, amber band around the edges.

Hair Color/Texture: Black, 1b hair texture. Just long enough for the ends to brush against his shoulders. Partially brushed back and parted to the right but a significant amount of his hair ends up falling into his face.

Face: Angular with a square jaw and high cheekbones. He has a mostly straight nose with a slight convex curve to the bridge. He has deep set eyes with heavy lids and dark circles and usually looks somewhat sleepy but in a strangely sensual way. Defined lips that are usually curved into a sadistic little smirk. He's quite attractive but in a way that feels vaguely dangerous or even predatory.

Distinguishing Characteristics: Adam has bright golden eyes with slitted cat-like pupils. He also has a rather large, jagged scar on his back, located between his shoulder blades. I'd include his *other* distinguishing characteristic but that's kinda NSFW ;)

Posture/Body Language: Confident, even arrogant, chin up, shoulders back but not in a way that looks particularly stiff. His body language is generally relaxed and easy, bringing to mind a big cat at rest -- there's always something about the way he moves that implies a predatory nature laying beneath his cool, collected surface. Adam walks with clear purpose and long, smooth strides and always knows how to make an entrance.

Voice: Soft and smooth with a deep timbre and confident inflection. Adam's voice is somewhat like poisoned honey or arsenic laced velvet -- smooth and sweet but with something slightly off.

Clothing Style: Adam prefers dark colors -- burgundy, blood red, black, charcoal, rich deep browns and the ocassional pop of gold or cream or a white dress shirt. He wears primarily expensive, tailored button downs made from things like silk, velvet or very high thread count cotton with the sleeves rolled up and the top three (or four) buttons undone. Sometimes with brocade, floral or striped patterns. If it's cooler out, he'll wear a black blazer or something similar. When it comes to pants, it's almost entirely black or charcoal tailored pants or pitch black jeans. He usually wears very few accessories -- a nice watch, a belt, a silver and garnet ring and a pendant on a thin silver or gold chain. Generally wearing pointed toe oxfords or other dress shoes. When it comes to outerwear, Adam generally prefers things like wool coats and the ocassional leather jacket (always real leather, too) (to get a better idea, check out his [Pinterest Board]

Skills

Social: Manipulation, Lying, Gaslighting, Flirting, Proper Etiquette, Public Speaking, Blame Shifting, Negging, Seduction

Physical: knife combat, some hand to hand combat, basic combat training (circa 1914), long range firearms/sniping, Ballroom Dancing, Fencing, Horseback riding, the carnal arts

Talents: Photography, Drawing, Poetry, Lying, Being an Asshole, Manipulation, Painting, Seduction, Sex

Knowledges: Fluent in French & Italian, Masters in Psychology (circa 1926), Photo Development (wet plate, autochrome, modern methods), some basic knowledge of financial law and property law

Hobbies: Photography, writing, breaking pretty girls, avoiding his deep-seated psychological issues, general hedonism

Special: Emotional Influence, Telepathy, Emotional Transference, Enhanced Stamina, Enhanced Strength, "Immortality", Enhanced Senses (esp sight), minor regeneration, sweet blood, emotional radar/supernatural empathy, hypnosis/mind control

Psyche

Strengths: Charismatic, quick-thinking, clever, good at understanding the thought processes of others, empathetic, deeply romantic, treats service workers well, dedicated, generally calm, high emotional intelligence, has critical thinking skills, polite*, can be incredibly sweet, adaptable, pays a lot of attention to his partners in bed, passionate, artistic, creative, protective

Weaknesses: selfish, self-absorbed, arrogant, manipulative, almost completley lacks compassion, disdain for basically everyone around him, dishonest, has a horrible temper, needs constant attention and praise, has a massive inferiority/superiority complex, overconfident, easily susceptible to flattery, deep-seated intimacy issues, can't stand being wrong, terrified of vulnerability, paranoid, detached from his own emotions/denies his own humanity, callous, sadistic, can be incredibly rude, actually a bit of a coward, condescending, possessive, jealous and generally kind of a dick.

Fears: genuine intimacy, abandonment/loneliness,true death, being buried alive

Goals: To finally create the perfect art piece (i.e., break someone in just the right way -- he's not even sure what this MEANS, he's just sure he'll "know" when he finally does it), to just enjoy his immortality.

Personality: On the surface, Adam seems likable enough -- at least, at first. He's incredibly charming and thoughtful, often anticipating people's wants before they're even able to articulate them, witty, intelligent and seemingly very polite...

But beneath that surface lurks a spoiled rich kid who learned early on in life that having money, being good looking and charming meant he could get away with almost anything. Adam is self-absorbed and arrogant and almost everything he does is a carefully crafted performance intended to get people on his side and manipulate them into doing what he wants.

Beneath even that, which he desperately tries to ignore, is a little boy who was spoiled by his mother and entirely ignored by his (largely absent) father -- a young man who was traumatized by being forced to fight in WWI and who is full of deep-seated fears and insecurities.

To make up for this, Adam is often sadistic towards the people around him -- but in that way where it's difficult to tell that he's actually being cruel until one looks back at the conversation.

He has difficulty genuinely connecting to others because of those insecurities and instead uses his powers as a Siren to make the people around him love and adore him-- no matter how badly he treats them.

Life

Best Memory: Being gifted his first camera, meeting his Maker.

Worst Memory: Somewhere between when he almost died during WWI and his actual death...

Biggest Achievement: Getting his Masters

Prized Possession: Silver and Garnet ring gifted to him by his Maker, his first camera, his black 2020 Ferrari Portofino (with the red leather interior), (he also has an engraved custom sniper rifle but a friend picked the model and shit for me and I cannot remember what it is for the life of me)

Favorite Color: Red, Gold

Favorite Food:

-Mortal Food: Partial to anything rich and flavorful, prefers food that's not pointlessly ostentatious (nothing coated in gold leaf, that's absurd), dry red wines, Italian Cream Cake, Eggs Benedict, Crepes Suzette

-Blood: Blood taken in the heat of the throes of passion from someone that's truly and deeply in love with and obsessed with him...

Favorite Scents: Blood, Gasoline, Cloves, Cinnamon, Resin, YSL Nuit, roses, vanilla, rain, the sharp smell of a cloudless winter night

Favorite Songs: Winter, 1st Movement - Vivaldi, Raindrops - Chopin, La Vie En Rose - Edith Piaf

Can't Leave Home Without: At least one knife somewhere on his person.

Birthplace: San Francisco, California

Childhood: Adam is the only child out of six in his family to survive to adulthood with four older siblings who had either in infancy, had been stillborn or died of tuberculosis when Adam was still too young to remember them. He had one younger sibling, a sister named Mary who was killed in an accident at the age of 6 when Adam was 8 years old. His parents were already a little bit older by the time he was born and his father was the owner of an incredibly lucrative railroad line and had profited greatly from the Gold Rush as well as owning multiple properties in San Francisco and neighboring Santa Marta...

Due to the loss of her other children, Adam's mother doted on him -- giving into his every whim, supplying him with the best education she could and basically just spoiling the ever loving fuck out of him. His father, on the other hand, was always busy with work and when he was home, had nothing but criticism for Adam who desperately tried to gain his approval to no avail.

Adolescence: Adam developed a passion for photography as a teenager and discovered that being good-looking, clever and rich meant he could get away with A LOT more than most people and also meant that he rarely heard "no" and accepted it as an answer even less often (though he rarely resorted to force to get his way, relying instead on bribery, flattery, blackmail and implied threats). All of this gave him quite an interest in psychology and he intended to become a clinical psychologist. During his adolescence, Adam would have a great many girlfriends and despite being a selfish and manipulative little shit, was actually not the world's worst boyfriend and no hint of the violent temper and genuine sadism he'd develop after being Changed.

Adulthood: Adam's education would be interrupted by the outbreak of WWI,which if asked he will describe as "incredibly distasteful and personally inconvenient." He was a skilled marksman and sniper but was otherwise unremarkable -- much to his father's disdain. After nearly dying in one of the trenches of France after taking a grievous bayonet wound in the last few months of the war, Adam would be sent back from the frontlines and would shortly begin work on continuing his education...

However -- despite the fact that he would complete all seven years necessary to get his degree, Adam's interest in becoming an actual psychologist wouldn't ever come to fruition. In 1925, he would meet Amelia Madeleine Smith -- an unbelievably beautiful and charming socialite from Santa Marta who would see Adam's potential as a source of money and influence for the Nightingale Court of Northern California. She would spend the next year carefully grooming him to become her protege -- manipulating him much in the same way he would later manipulate the women he dates as a vampire -- using emotional transference, mind control and mundane manipulation to cause him to fall madly in love with her... In December of 1925, Amelia would finally perform the ritual of transformation on him and bring Adam over into the world of the Supernatural.

Unfortunately for Adam, his Change would take nearly two weeks to complete -- two weeks spent in absolute agony beyond anything he'd experienced before. Amelia, believing the most important first step for a newly born vampire is to break their bonds to humanity would kidnap his mother during this change and leave her for him to kill upon waking. Adam would remain with Amelia (who used her bond as Adam's maker to control most of his actions and her abilities as a Siren to continue to influence his emotions) until 1980 when she was killed by a member of the Bram Park Wolf Pack in Santa Marta, leaving Adam behind. During this period, Adam would end up being "taken in" by a bonded pair of Stryza -- Camille Belikova and Lucy DeSantos and would act as their primary draw for new playthings.

Recent: Adam met Morgan Kendrick at the Velvet Box goth club in Santa Marta when Morgan was twenty two years old and would sweep her off her feet, intending to make her into his "masterpiece"... Three years into this relationship, Adam would finally Change Morgan, which would break the initial control he had over her and result in her, in a fit of rage, completely draining him and through a magical fluke, causing his spirit to become bonded/fused with her blood...

Recently, Adam's presence has disappeared from Morgan's psyche due to the machinations of Miss Belikova and her wife -- though it appears that the two of them are still inextricably linked in a way beyond the usual bond between Maker and Fledgling.

Relationships

Family: Lawrence Freemont (Father; Deceased), Anne Freemont (Mother; Deceased), Mary Freemont (Sister; Deceased)

Lovers: Amelia Smith (Maker; Deceased), Morgan Kendrick (Fledgling, Ex, Soulbond), Many other unnamed girls.

Friends: Camille Belikova, Lucille DeSantos, Jonathan Andreason

Enemies: Morgan Kendrick, the Bram Park Wolfpack

Acquaintances: Miranda Cortez (Queen of the Nightingale Court of Santa Marta)

Income: Moderately Wealthy

Vehicles: 2020 Ferrari Portofino

Residences: Penthouse Apartment in Vista Rosa, a small Victorian row house in Val Del Mar and a 1br/1ba apartment in Park Verde (all located in Santa Marta)

[kaaras-adaar]

Kaaras and Kilt Wearing

// I think I had some old headcanons on this, but they’re lost in the void and most likely outdated anyway. So I wanted to do a proper revamp of Kaaras and when it comes to kilt wearing.

Longer term Rpers probably remember parts of this, or art I’ve done, but for anyone new, this is PRETTY old, so I wouldn’t be surprised if no one knew Kaaras wore kilts in a more traditional (or when home farmlike) setting. Generally speaking, you will not see him wearing a kilt around Skyhold or the battlefield. Only on special occasions does he wear dress kilts, and only at home, working the farm, does he wear working (utility) ones.

It would be super handy to first of all read THIS POST, which I am heavily going off when it comes to Thedasian climate, history, geography and the reasons WHY I don’t believe that kilts = Starkhaven and why they would be seen more in Ferelden, or at least I think. Ofc, the upcoming games could always overwrite this headcanon, but until then, this makes logical sense to me and a cultural sense. You also have to remember that Thedas isn’t Earth. Most of the countries in Thedas are inspired by MULTIPLE cultures here.

The main reason for Kaaras being comfortable in kilts is because he grew up poor. These were easy to make, easy to wear, especially for the work around the farm. I could see them being more traditional in setting as well, for those of nobility who may wear them (which are far more pretty and made of higher quality materials). Kaaras’ kilts as a boy were not flashy, not tartan, they were just plain pieces of fabric, plain utility kilts. They helped movement, and with keeping cooler and warmer depending the months.

Kilts for him nowadays are mainly used for formal occasions.

I’m sure there’d be some history behind their creation in a Thedasian setting, but I’m just going to leave that ambiguous atm because this is just my own headcanons. I assume there are definitely uses for them in a formal way for Ferelden as well. For instance, here in Australia, our police parades use them, and our military (we’re not Scottish, but we are still under the Commonwealth of the UK–it’s a part of our heritage, too, and MINE personally considering my heritage is Scottish), and they also play the bagpipes. Can you imagine Fereldan royalty in them for special occasions, parades, etc. It would be amazing!

Kaaras didn’t have a lot of clothes growing up, in fact, most of his clothes were rags and oversized shirts or something that covered his nudity. To be honest, his underwear was probably just a cloth wrapped around his hips. Yes, Kaaras was that poor as a child. Everything that the rams gave them went right back into the rams. They had money to pay for food, make some crops, etc. Nothing to really be new or special, everything was second hand and used, or hand crafted from his mother, sometimes, they could afford a special treat if they earned enough from the farm at the markets, or someone gave them a good trade.

His father did some odd jobs here and there for the villages over, which earned them some extra sovereigns, enough to maybe keep a ram blanket for them every now and again. So, clothes for Kaaras were not really an option, he ALSO got used to wearing things that might be considered a robe/dress/lack of pants. He got used to being barefoot and his legs showing. This might seem a shock to those who know Kaaras now, because he hardly resembles the poverty he once came from (particularly since he’s been working with nobles the last few years in Starkhaven and has adopted some of their finery).

Wearing a kilt would be no issue for him. That’s at least until he changed and grew up. Kaaras is exceptionally insecure about his body, even more so as he grew into being a man. When his father died, he had no male figure, and therefore didn’t enjoy or understand his body. He also grew taller and the more he interacted with humans, the worse it became to being so very aware of how different he was. Thus he began to cover himself up and became exceptionally private.

Wearing kilts or skirts and dresses were normal as a boy. Many of the poor kids in Ferelden wore them also, so it wasn’t anything different to see on him. But as he got older, as he mingled with older children and of course adults, that changed a lot. He was more aware of how ugly his body was in comparison. He was also earning money, so he could purchase something of finer quality, something that could cover him more.

When Kaaras moved to Starkhaven, I feel wearing a kilt would have been seen as something almost… preposterous. Especially showing skin near nobles. Kaaras didn’t have a need to wear them anymore. So he didn’t. He also wanted to keep a professional look about him. His clothes are influenced over time to be a professional appearance, someone to be taken seriously. His clothes SPEAK for him, show that he is not poor like he once was, show that he demands to be heard and respected.

Only in a more traditional setting does Kaaras wear a kilt now. He has gotten used to wearing pants and prefers them greatly (because he doesn’t like his skin showing anymore). Nowadays, it is kept for something shown when he is representing his country, as a Fereldan man. He does not wear one at the Winter Palace because he goes by Josephine’s orders as she knows how to deal with Orlesians more than he does. However, he does wear one during his wedding, with whoever he marries (default verse or RP).

[mytwitterisdogtoast1]

Yugi’s decks and some other odd stuff that just makes sense.

This is a weird double kind of post where I focus on many things because of a little project I’ve been working on. So as anyone who has ever grown up and has been into Yu-Gi-Oh knows you just can’t not like the anime. From the ridiculous duels and cards to the ridiculous hair on every single character and I’m not talking about the newer shows so much as just the original show because that’s probably the “best” one to most people (partial to GX myself even though I know it’s not the best and Konami kinda messed up on it at the end of the series in USA). See if you watch the show a simple easy thing that anyone who gets it would like would be to get the decks of a character. Heck even if it was Weevil people would be a little excited but not as excited as if they got one of the main characters. Which was great because even though it’s old news I was very excited to buy the legendary decks for Yugi. See that is an amazing product idea that can bring in everyone who likes Yu-Gi-Oh. You bring in the casuals by giving them his decks, you bring in the collectors for cards that don’t exist yet here in the west or even those who have missed out on older cards, and you bring in the more serious crowd for cards that are in archetypes that might be harder to find maybe (probably not because the game has evolved to such a degree that even mirror force isn’t good anymore.) but still 2/3 ain’t bad. Let’s be honest though. This is Konami so they’re gonna find a way to fuck it up and I’m a decent guy so I usually try to have some faith in things. Even things like Konami who ruin most of their IPs in general but hey, I keep that faith. This was a simple thing to do but in the end they messed it up with really easy to do things. Now let’s just be really honest about this. if this product interested you. You would buy it if it hit the sweet spot of cost = product. I know I would and I’m sure many others would as well. Let’s assume Konami does its best in that it not only releases every single card Yugi has ever used before but also makes each card that doesn’t exist, to exist. They would have to make a handful of cards yes, but people would probably go and buy that product cause every deck he’s run is in it in their entirety. We can assume they would use his actual deck lists and make his actual decks. Yeah, his decks are not good but let’s face it fan, cosplayers, kids, adults and everyone and their grandma would buy this product. Nostalgia is a huge thing nowadays and even if we can’t play it in a tournament and hope to win we could just roll up, throw down a fiver and just play that sweet sweet celtic guardian. Now let’s be a little more realistic. Let’s assume we take the middle road which is absolutely the best idea. Heck we’ll take both sides of that road and give two middle road ideas that are the best idea. Make his actual decks and only use cards printed while printing about 5 cards that haven’t been made. That electromagnetic turtle is pretty dope not gonna lie. Point is even then we would still get a 4 card deck from each main part of the journey. 120 cards, 5 promos, the art cards for duelist kingdom, the god cards (playable or not even) would not set anyone back hard in printing since they’re all stuff already made in real life and would even bring cards like torike and horn imp into the west which haven’t even come here. Heck don’t even make decks. Throw in every card from every single season he has ever used. We don’t need to have 2 giant soldier of stones. (yes he uses two at one point) It would however be nice if we just got the cards the way he has them in looks and what he has. Call it Yugis legendary collection and it is the same exact thing. The worst thing you could do is just make his deck and just add in random shit like 3 dark magician girls. Which is what they did. Like This is a simple thing to make man how could you mess up by adding cards he didn’t use in decks when they didn’t exist then? Even detonate which is a card Kaiba uses. Look man it’s not the biggest of deals but the fact that the next set was stuff “based on their main cards” and Yugi had exodia? HE USED IT IN ONE DUEL. Make a dark magician deck. Sure it would reprint some of the same stuff but lets face it. THAT’S WHAT PEOPLE WOULD WANT. We don’t want something LIKE it. We want that thing.  Why does this matter? Honestly besides how sad the product was it really made me want the thing I didn’t get and it is near impossible ( at least I assume) to get torike and horn imp in the west when I believe it has had one printing in the east only and the only way to buy the cards are to go buy Orica stuff. Which in their own way is nice too. Support artists. So I took it upon myself to make those exact decks and to in general just make it a small side project in my life. Duelist kingdom deck was mostly easy to do and I am missing just 3 cards so I can buy 2 of them no problem and the others are torike and horn imp. Cards we never got (fuck you Konami). That’s when I started to see the other seasons which are not cannon in comics but are technically cannon in the show. Filler is a very iffy thing to use but I’m super casual and actually like filler in things I like. Hell DBZ has some of the better filler in the side stuff it puts in because it never really changes much. However sometimes you can have too much filler or filler that changes the series totally (stares at bleach, Naruto, and one piece. You all know what you did).  Now why does this also matter? Because it raises a ton of questions about the series in general when you look at a characters decks. Did you know that as iconic as Gaia the fierce knight is he doesn’t show up past duelist kingdom? Even in the manga he only has it in duelist kingdom. This raises a ton of questions. Like Gaia the dragon champion is really good in the anime. Because let’s face it. If you are going to use chimera in your duels than why not have Gaia in there as well to make a stronger monster? It’s one of his boss monsters. I mean he still uses curse of dragon in every deck except waking the dragons which again I know it’s not fully cannon but that shouldn’t stop them from using him. Unless there was a decent enough reason. I think that reason is you don’t need the monster itself in duelist kingdom to make the fusion. Which I can actually make an argument for. Yugi has 2 monsters in his deck. First is Black skull dragon and Dragon master knight. I know one is filler but it would fit the same argument regardless because even if we take from the anime it might be a little different in the manga and comic for battle city but that is indeed cannon. So the point I’m making is it’s a little strange Yugi would have either of those mosnters in his deck. He never knew he was going to work with Joey or Kaiba ever so why would he just have them? Trade doesn’t really work that way in the show cause we never see it and I know that dude isn’t carrying around cards because let’s face it. He didn’t bring anything but his cards and a glove. He didn’t have replacement cards. Which makes you wonder where the time wizard was from when he gave it to joey. He isn’t carrying extra cards cause the world doesn’t have packs the same way and cards would be more diverse or shittier and packs are like 5 cards per pack. So having such a rare and powerful card like that and it just “being around” makes 0 sense. Which makes you believe that it came from his deck. So time wizard was an original card. We have to remember that the reason he never played it is he never drew it in his duels and then gave it to Joey. Which makes the most sense. So if we go by that logic it would be understandable that since time wizard doesn’t fuse into baby dragon that you don’t even need thousand dragon in the extra deck. That also means dark sage isn’t even in Yugis deck because if it was meant to pair with time wizard he’d have taken it out or he just simply never ran into it or was a jerk and threw it in to counter Joey. So by that logic the reason Gaia never made a return is he never had the fusion in the first place. This makes me assume many things about the decks written are kind of misleading. Firstly the fact that Yugi has the same deck kind of but changes it every season. It makes 0 sense that he would in a world where cards are not a common supply even though it is the most common thing in his world to have that he would just always remake his deck mostly alike and then in general change 10 cards out only to put them back in to only take them out again. So when mysical elf is in his deck in virtual world but he doesn’t put 2 giant soldiers of stone in makes me question if he actually even doesn’t have mystical elf in his deck normally but sure as heck has feral imp. I came to the conclusion that in every season Yugi is just running the same deck with no differences. If there are differences it would be he added them in later on because he got the card and the only reason we never see it is that the man has over 80 cards in his deck. No it’s not 40 no matter how many times he says it because anime rules. It makes even less sense to change the deck not just for every season but every duel that he would have life shaver in against Kaiba only and then never play it in a duel ever again or something along those lines. Why does this matter? If I am going to make his decks I want to be as “accurate” as possible and am going to make his decks but it’s not like anyone wants to just make 7 decks for the dude. Especially when you take the Pharaoh into account as well. And who even wants to actually just make a Yugi themed deck? It’s not the same as having his decks themselves. It is much cooler in the end to actually have his deck. Even if it is 4000 cards large.

[teruthecreator]

if you're comfortable, could you say what specifically you hated about the finale? i never got into amnesty but i liked balance so i would like to know how disappointed i should be ://

okay i’m gonna explain this in-detail exactly Once bc i’m trying rlly hard to just forget about the whole epilogue and keep it moving like that shit never happened, so for anyone else who is asking me why i don’t like the finale (and im not saying you’re wrong for asking, anon, it just seems that when you vocally do not like a thing there are hundreds of people who come out of the woodworks to ask you why and i think thats kinda Huh, Weird of everyone but like whatever) i’m gonna lay it all out here on the table and you can take this as you will. 

i’m not gonna be getting into fistfights with people abt this so if you disagree please don’t try and banter with me. i am running on <4 hours of sleep rn (bc i dont value my physical or mental health above my grades hbgjrbgj) so sorry if this is a little hodgepodge too. my limbs are literally still trembling from last night 

also, CRITICISM OF ART DOES NOT MEAN CRITICISM OF THE ARTIST. I AM NOT CRITICIZING THE MCELROYS AS HUMAN BEINGS, BUT RATHER THEIR ARTISTIC DECISIONS IN TAZ: AMNESTY. MORE PEOPLE NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT THERE IS A SEPARATION BETWEEN ART AND ARTIST, AND ONCE YOU (AS AN ARTIST) POST A PIECE, IT BECOMES SUBJECT TO CRITICISM. I AM NOT BRINGING GRIFFIN, JUSTIN, TRAVIS, OR CLINT’S CHARACTERS INTO QUESTION; I AM SIMPLY GIVING A CRITICISM ON THE SHOW THEY’VE CREATED AS A WORK OF ART. 

oh, this goes without saying, but i will anyway: SPOILERS FOR AMNESTY (IN GENERAL, BUT ALSO FOR EPISODE 36) 

i’m gonna start off by saying, i don’t think the whole episode was a total disaster. there are two things mainly that have ruined the whole experience for me, but for the most part i thought the like first 2 hours of this episode were a lot of fun! the fight scene was a little bogged down in the rolls imo, but it didn’t deter me too much from the overarching boss battle. the intro was a sick concept, i enjoyed the callback bits spliced in w newly scripted bits from mentioned past encounters, that was all well and good. i loved beacon in the episode, and god do i wish he stayed for the whole thing. 

my problem mainly sits with the epilogue, which is why i think the whole episode turns sour in my mind. because the epilogue is supposed to be what satiates your desire to know more, right? not to reference balance too much (bc these are two completely different stories w different premises, and for people to so readily compare them is kinda wack. that being said, they are two stories made by the same people that use an epilogue to wrap up the loose ends, so im gonna make this one comparison), but the epilogue told us, the listener, all the things we wanted to know about after the day of story of song. we got to know what they did, a little bit of their interpersonal relationships, and we even got a big group scene with the killarey wedding! 

this epilogue, though, feels like it left so much still on the table. one of those things i will swing back to later because it is the largest part of my argument, but after all of this time we still don’t know why everyone at the lodge got exiled! no one talks about it! we don’t know how dani ended up there, or jake, or barclay, or moira, or anyone! they don’t reference the banishments at all, which i think is a huge shortcoming figuring that is the core premise as to why these characters exist in our pc’s world in the first place. 

i also feel like the concept of the worlds being divided for a long time is kind of a dumb way to go about framing what they do After The Fact. like, they could have had those scenes happen without the looming concept of them being divided, especially when their big reunion scene is like 2 minutes long and basically does nothing. what would have been a cooler premise is if billy connected the worlds, and the worlds worked together in rebuilding themselves. we still could’ve had the same bits happen (for the most part), but i just think that whole separation bit kinda alienated the pc’s (especially thacker). 

but everything up to aubrey’s epilogue bit is fine. i have some problems, but it’s fine. where i started to completely abandon the work itself though is duck’s bit, and i’m gonna get into it by saying this: I know Justin Mcelroy is not legally required to make all of his characters gay, but this whole scene was just a big reminder to me that this show is done by 4 straight white men

and yeah, my big problem with this scene is the fact that justin had to make Duck/Minerva a thing. because it adds nothing to the story while also being a very skeevy concept in-general, and it reduces minerva’s character down to the Hero’s Girlfriend trope and it’s so comphet and she doesn’t deserve it. 

my first grievance with this: It adds nothing to the story. 

had justin not even mentioned the relationship part of their interaction before the scene actually took place, this scene would be like every other scene involving duck and minerva prior to this. duck says honey once, and even that could’ve been played off as duck just being affectionate to his friends (which is a thing, i call several of my friends “my love” irl and it isn’t a big deal). minerva doesn’t even use pet names, she calls duck by his full name, which is exactly how she addressed him in every other scene! duck’s speech is a genuine heart-puller, but it was completely soured by the fact that justin had to premise this entire scene by saying duck and minerva are a thing. 

my second grievance: it’s a skeevy-as-all-hell concept. 

this whole premise is nasty seven ways from sunday, and it is my biggest problem with duck’s bit as a whole. for starters, and i think more people need to mention this, minerva meets duck on the night of his 18th birthday. which means duck has literally just stopped being legally considered a minor before minerva appears before him. and honestly, i would still consider duck a minor in this case because he has literally just turned 18!!! his brain has not developed past one of a 17-year-old on the exact date of his birthday, and i argue it will not until he is at least in his twenties. keep in mind, your brain does not stop developing until you are about 25. so while in the legal sense, duck is an adult, in both the mental and emotional sense at that exact moment, duck is still a minor. AND he’s still in high school, as referenced in his response to her call to duty: “i got class tomorrow”. and minerva is old enough to have become the minister of defense for her homeworld, go through an entire war, and have several other chosen ones (including leo tarkesian, who is at least 20 years older than duck) before meeting duck. so that makes her much, much older than duck when she meets him. and i don’t care if they had barely any interaction after that first moment (though they did, as justin legit talks about when he introduces minerva as a concept to the show), that still establishes their initial interaction at a massive age difference. which, regardless of anything, makes their eventual relationship so genuinely messed up. 

sure, you can argue that when you get older age doesn’t make that much of a difference, and i would agree. my mother is 53 and her husband is 63, that’s ten years. but my mother and step mother did not meet at 8 and 18, they met at 50 and 60. the initial interaction makes all the difference between “older people meeting and having a relationship” and “a very messed up situation”. 

also, in this same argument, taking the mentor-student relationship and turning it into a romantic relationship IS SO MESSED UP!!!! GENUINELY AND HONESTLY MESSED UP!!! i feel like i don’t need to explain this because there have been so many examples already as to why this is a relationship you Should Not turn romantic, but i will anyway because it frustrates me so much that justin completely glosses over this!!! the power dynamic of a mentor-student relationship, in whatever way it is portrayed, displays a power balance that is heavily leaning to one side. there is not an equal distribution of power amongst the two because one person is teaching the other. the one person is weak to the others wills and whims because of lack of experience. think of your high school teacher or college professor; if you started a relationship with them, people would raise so many questions because you are not at equals to the teacher/professor. even if they treat you different, and even if they no longer teach you, it all has to do with the initial interaction. and minerva was still duck’s mentor up until either episode 34 or 35, when she handed off the title of Herald of the Astral Mind to duck. that means for nearly all of their interactions, there was a mentor-student dynamic. to have that turn into a romantic relationship is so sketchy and weird and leaves a bad taste in my mouth. 

my third grievance: it reduces minerva’s character down to a girlfriend trope, and it’s comphet as hell 

my friend tin (@taako–waititi) phrased this so well in the big group chat im in w her, so imma just quote her on this and then go into the comphet stuff: 

“i was dming max about it and they also mentioned, quote, ‘her story was never about romance. it reduced her down to ‘competent woman becomes endgame girlfriend’ trope’ and they are so right it makes me fucking pissed. regardless of any ‘mutual respect’ and ‘emotional intimacy’ kind of thing going on that some people are arguing for, it’s something that didn’t need to happen because minerva’s character becomes that. my thing is mutual respect and emotional intimacy between two people can. exist. without it being. romantic. like. friendship is. also valid. i personally don’t think that mutual respect and emotional intimacy are two buttons that you press to make the machine churn out a romance” 

not only does it reduce minerva’s character to tropes, but it also is extremely comphet for a woman who is so heavily wlw-coded or lesbian-coded and it just angers me. you could argue that she could be bi, but if we look at canon for just its face-value, the only romantic interaction she ever has is with a man, which basically makes her straight. this isn’t like aubrey’s situation, where travis clearly states she is a bi woman who is just in a relationship with another woman in amnesty. griffin doesn’t state anything about minerva’s sexuality and then she’s paired off with a man right at the end. and you could argue that she isn’t wlw or lesbian-coded, but i am not the only one who is wlw and thinks this, so i feel like i have more of a ground to stand on in this opinion. and this just feels so, like, textbook compulsory heteronormativity it made me feel physically sick when i heard this bit in the podcast. 

so that’s my first big issue with the finale, fully explained. my second issue with the epilogue is that ned’s death continues to be disappointing and his character arc is never completed, which just tanks the whole show for me. 

i’ve talked about this several times since ep 28 about how ned’s death was stupid and did nothing for his character arc, but i’m gonna reiterate my main points for the people who find this post without knowing my whole blog:

1. ned’s main interpersonal conflicts are just brought to the surface and never fully delved into before his sudden death. ned doesn’t ever get to explain his history with boyd and why he had to steal shade tree to mama or barclay or really anyone besides vaguely to aubrey. 

2. every character is just immediately expected to feel sad about ned’s death, despite the tension that still remains right up until the very end. aubrey shouldn’t have even known that the shapeshifter framed ned because that’s all explained once she goes to sylvain, but i think travis just assumed she did because he heard the interaction between ned, mama, and barclay. so she should’ve had Way more conflicting feelings about the whole thing, but ned’s death is just angst-bait so that doesn’t happen.

3. ned’s death doesn’t make roll sense because clint rolled a mixed success and mixed successes, by definition, are supposed to be less severe moves than a failed roll (which gives the gm the ability to make a hard move). there isn’t really anything harder to do to a character than kill them, but even if you wanted to argue that if clint failed the roll the hard move would’ve been ned failing and letting dani get shot, it still doesn’t change the fact that clint rolled a mixed success when slamming into the pizza hut sign at full velocity and came out of that alive (severely injured, naturally, but still alive). 

so, yeah, there’s that. and then theres the fact that griffin doesn’t ever give us any other scenes involving ned directly. ned only becomes a reference from 28 on, which is so disappointing given ned’s importance to the other two pcs. and i understand that the mcelroys have a lot of trauma related to death, but griffin shouldn’t have killed ned off then if he did not want to talk about death in graphic detail. we all have trauma. we all want to avoid topics. but to kill ned off and then never talk about his death in great relation to the others is a genuine disservice to ned’s character. 

the day episode 28 aired was the same day i buried my grandmother. i would have loved if death wasn’t brought up, but i don’t control the podcast. the mcelroys do; they had the ability to avoid this topic in a more servicing way to the characters and they didn’t. that isn’t to say they are bad people for not doing it, but it makes the finale even more disappointing because it means we never get the full rounding out of ned’s character arc. he becomes this like brief reference that is, once again, angst-bait or emotional fuel and i feel like he didn’t deserve that. he deserved a genuine reference, a genuine moment. even a dream sequence i would have appreciated!!! 

griffin had sylvain directly point at ned in aubrey’s flashback in ep 35, and then did nothing about what that could have implicated in the finale. it sours the entire episode in a major way and disappointed me immensely. there should have been more done with that topic and there wasn’t and i will never forget how deeply it hurt me and turned me away from canon as a whole. not to be ned kin on main, but ned was the backbone of this show and the exact moment he left was the exact moment the whole thing went downhill. it turned less into a story about growth and adversary and amnesty and more into a waiting game for when this very loose end was going to get wrapped up. 

i wanted to enjoy this episode. i tried so hard, y’all. but just the thought of ned loomed over me the entire time and i was waiting for a more proper completion to his arc, and it never happened. and coupled with that very bad and skeevy duck/minerva bit i was just so frustrated and hurt last night. 

so, yeah, that’s my whole spiel. you are free to disagree with me, but keep that opinion to yourself because i’m not getting into it with anyone. i will just block you; it’s better for us both, anyway. 

[mediocrity-at-best]

Leaf You Happy

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Title: Leaf You Happy

Prompt: jumping in leaves

Warnings: Remus, brief Deceit, Remus-regular dialogue

Pairings: Familial Creativitwins

Words: 1,450

@sanderssidescelebrations This is for the first day of Spooky Month! I had a lot of fun writing this and I hope y’all have fun reading! If there’s anything else I need to tag/warnings I need to mention, let me know!

Without further ado, my first submission!

Roman sits inside, staring out the window longingly. There is not a speck of green in sight, and he could not be happier. The trees stand as tall but bare guardians against the sky and their leaves litter the ground like some kind of giant’s discolored dandruff. Even with the window open only a crack, the most delicious autumn chill is creeping in the air and he can already smell pumpkin spice. He can’t wait to go to Starbucks for his first official Pumpkin Spice Latte of the season.

But that isn’t what has him so excited today.

Today, Roman is looking more specifically forward to a tradition he and his brother have enforced since they were children. Something neither one of them could imagine going without, and also something entirely undignified. It was maybe the least princely thing Roman derived joy from. But also quite possibly the best.

The Annual Leaf Jump. It has been called many things over the years, but the rules have never changed: you make a truly absurd pile of leaves, you run at it, and you jump in. It’s how they know that sweater season has started, and how they welcome Halloween every year. It appeals to Remus’s taste in the messy with the explosion of leaves and the damp ones on the bottom of the pile and Roman’s taste in the beautiful, cinematic splash of reds and oranges that make him look amazing if you get a picture at just the right moment.

He can’t wait to do it.

In preparation, yesterday he and Remus had raked all the leaves in their front and back yard into a pile and then even raked their neighbor’s leaves up too, free of charge. It was a lot of work, but now the giant pile of leaves was almost as tall as Roman and in all the most beautiful shades of red and orange and yellow. They dried in the sunny chill of the autumn day and now are perfectly crunchy.

Roman wishes Remus didn’t have class today.

Still, there’s nothing to do about it except wait until he gets home at two. Luckily, that’s only twenty minutes away. Unfortunately, that is still twenty minutes away.

Until the front door bursts open and Remus is spilling in.

“Remus! It is today! Are you ready?” Roman yells. Remus is already grinning maniacally.

“Ready as a juicy butthole.” Sometimes Roman regrets that Remus was given the power of speech. Sometimes he wishes he’d absorbed his twin in utero.

“Yeah, uh, okay,” Roman says. “Are you going to wear…that?” Roman gestures vaguely at Remus’s shirt, a dark green crop top proclaiming ‘BLOW ME’ and the matching booty shorts that say ‘NASTY’. Roman has accepted how Remus dresses. That doesn’t mean he wants to be seen in public with him.

“Well, why wouldn’t I? They’re my clothes. I think.” Remus looks down suspiciously at his shirt, and Roman decides the last thing he wants to do is ruin today by thinking about what person Remus found that would have the same disgusting taste in clothes. He will grin and bear it.

“I don’t want to know,” Roman says. “Let’s just do this.” He pulls the door open, ready to get them leaves, only to be greeted with Virgil’s face. Virgil is their neighbor on the left who occasionally has duets with Roman in exchange for art pieces. His roommate Dee always wears bright yellow dish-washing gloves and has never once even hinted at a reason why. Roman doesn’t trust either one of them as far as he can throw them, but they have good taste in movies, great pillows for pillow forts, and are willing to host up to twelve people in Disney Marathons. So they’re pretty alright at the end of it.

“Virgil!” Roman sings, doing his best to pretend that didn’t start out as a scream. “Hello! My brother and I are busy today, please come back tomorrow.” Remus shoves them all out the door and pulls it shut behind them. Roman begins to pull up the camera on his phone so he can record this epic moment and edit it later so it looks as amazing as it feels, but Virgil has yet to leave.

“Uh, did you need something, Dark and Stormy?”

“I’m going to Starbucks. Dee’s too embarrassed to admit he wants a Pumpkin Spice Latte so I’m going to get one to drink in front of him. Do you want to come?” Roman sends a look at Remus over his shoulder.

“What if you went bobbing for apples and found eyeballs instead?” Remus says as though it’s an answer and Roman knows that’s as close to acquiescing as Remus is going to come.

“Yeah, we’ll go. Right after this, though.” Roman pauses. “Actually, could you record it for me?” He shoves his phone into Virgil’s hands, and Virgil sighs.

“What are you doing?”

“We’re going to jump in the leaves,” Roman says.

“From the roof!” Remus adds, a gleam in his eyes and quiver in his mustache. Roman immediately throws a hand out toward Remus. There’s no telling what he’ll actually do and what he’s just saying because it flitted through his mind.

“No! We are not jumping from the roof.” Remus pouts.

“It’d be cooler,” Virgil mutters but says nothing else and holds the phone up. Roman decides it’s best not to comment on that at all, lest Remus or Virgil get any more unsavory ideas. Instead, he grins and looks to Remus.

“Are you ready? Actually, don’t answer that. Let’s do this.” Quickly, Roman directs Virgil to the front of the house and angles the camera how he wants it. He and Remus start on either side of Virgil, and then they nod to each other.

“One,” Roman says.

“Two,” Remus sings.

“Three,” Virgil sighs and they both take off. They whoop and scream as they launch themselves into the leaves, and Roman enjoys the feeling of weightlessness followed by a soft, (unfortunately) moist landing. Roman laughs loudly and he can hear Remus laughing next to him, for once a real laugh instead of his usual evil cackle, and Roman really feels like fall is here. This is, in all ways, the best season. He is heavily biased, but that doesn’t make him wrong.

“Whoo!” comes from the side, and Roman looks over to see Patton jumping up and down next to a confused-but-disgusted looking Logan. “That looked like a lot of fun, kiddos! Now I see why you couldn’t just leaf all those leaves lying on the ground!” Logan’s face loses the confusion and is now pure disgust, and Roman feels a little smug. Just a smidge.

Remus flings himself out of the leaves, somehow having already knotted multiple leaves into his hair and covered his face in dirt. His genuine laugh turns maniacal again and Roman takes that as his cue to leave. He jumps from the leaf pile and runs for Virgil, snatching his phone back.

“Thanks, Incredible Sulk. You ready for Starbucks?” Roman doesn’t wait for an answer, instead heading for the sidewalk. It’s just chilly enough for a jacket and the walk isn’t that far. It will be good to get some sunshine.

“Where are you kids going?” Patton asks. Roman can see the eye-roll from Virgil, supposedly two years older than Patton despite not even looking like an adult, and he can practically hear whatever nasty thing Remus is going to shout if given the opportunity to answer, so he answers for all three of them.

“Starbucks. Do you want to join? They’ve released the Pumpkin Spice Lattes again.” Virgil grumbles something about this being his trip, and shouldn’t he be in charge of inviting people along, but Patton enthusiastically agrees and loops his arm through Logan’s to pull him along at the same time Dee materializes behind Virgil like some kind of Pumpkin Spice summoned spirit, and Roman grins. Remus goes running ahead of their group for the most part, disturbing leaves and catching bugs to gross out Patton and Roman, and together the six of them head for Starbucks.

It’s a good day. Roman feels amazing. He feels so good, in fact, Dee might only have to ask him to order the Pumpkin Spice Latte for him twice before Roman does it. And he might not even make fun of him for wanting something so widely considered to be mainstream teenage girl culture.

But he probably will. And Patton will make puppy eyes at him until he stops, and then Virgil will take the torch. It’s a good day, and it’s setting up to be a perfect day. Roman can’t help but smile.

[harryswanderlust]

Overdue

where y/n’s the new library assistant and harry doesn’t actually show up for the books...

warnings: none

requested: nope

It wasn’t until the beginning of September that Y/n had really started to appreciate her job in the campus library. She’d been working there for only a few weeks, every night from six ‘til eight, and she enjoyed it. She enjoyed sorting through endless amounts of books and placing them back on the proper shelf. She’d end up finding new and exciting things to read from doing this, and at first, she thought that was the best part of her job, but after someone waltzed into her library during the start of September, she was given a new reason to love it so much.

She remembers it being a particularly cold night, which was surprising to no one since it was the beginning of the autumn season in upstate New York. Everyone already had their jackets pulled out by the end of August and were adjusting to the cooler temperatures. Everyone except Y/n. She’s always hated the cold, and she’s set on moving out of New York once she graduates. All she wants to do when fall and winter roll around is curl up in a pile of blankets and read until she falls asleep, but on that night a cup of hot chocolate would have to suffice.

It was a typical Thursday, and it wasn’t any quieter or less empty than any other day of the week since most kids couldn’t find the library even if they tried. She always finds it amusing when certain students come rushing in to find a book for a paper they were supposed to start writing weeks ago, but chose to wait until the last minute instead. It’s usually the same people over and over again, and thankfully it’s not a daily occurrence, but it did happen on this night as Y/n’s shift was coming to an end.

She’d lost track of time, so it was a few minutes past eight when he hurried in, but the library hours have always been clearly posted on the doors. She briefly looked up from what she was reading–Shakespeare’s Hamlet–when she heard the door swing open, and felt a gust of cool air blow in. She let out an annoyed sigh when she glanced up at the clock to check the time. She was hungry and planned on grabbing something to eat after locking up, but now she was going to have to wait because some idiot couldn’t read a sign.

She observed the stranger as he made his way inside, trying her best not to scrutinize him too hard or get caught staring. He was wearing a university hoodie that appeared to be in desperate need of a wash, and his hair is falling in disheveled ringlets in front of his face from being windblown. She cut him some slack for it because everyone on campus was only trying to stay warm, but it didn’t make her less irritated with him.

He looked to be a bit older than she was. Maybe around twenty-one? She didn't think there was any way he could be a sophomore like her or any younger than a junior really. His sleeves were half rolled up, exposing a trail of tattoos up his left arm and a wristband on his right arm with the name of his frat house. She decided to shrug it off, simply going back to reading her Shakespeare while he went about finding the books he needed. She was almost near the end of the third act when he walked up to the checkout counter, shaking his hands through his tousled curls for about the tenth time since he arrived.

It wasn’t until then that she truly got a good look at him, and she could physically feel her heart skip a beat when was met with a pair of forest green eyes, simultaneously shutting the play and nearly falling off her stool in the process. She stumbled before catching herself on the counter and flashed him a smile to try and conceal her embarrassment.

“That’s one of his longest plays isn’t it?” He asked her as he slid a few books across the counter for her to check out. Her brows drew together, his question throwing her way off guard before she registered that he was talking about Hamlet. Her eyes shifted back and forth between him and the play because she definitely wasn’t expecting him to ask her that.

“Uh, yeah. I think it is,” is all she could manage to say in response, working to grab the books he placed in front of her to scan them. She eyes him unsurely for a moment, and an awkward silence stretched between them as the scanner beeped a couple of times.

“It’s been a while since I’ve read that, but ‘to be or not to be: that is the question’, right?” He asked, quoting the play to her, and she swore her jaw practically dropped to the floor. She didn’t think he was dumb–hell, she didn’t even know the guy–but if someone had told her she’d be talking to him about Shakespeare she wouldn’t have believed them. But here he was quoting Hamlet of all plays. Her own friends didn’t even discuss Shakespeare with her, and they’ve always got their noses stuck in some piece of literature as much as she does.

“I think Hamlet should’ve let nature run its course, you know? I believe in fate, and by taking things into his own hands he only made things worse. Nothing was really resolved,” he said, reaching for his books as she handed them back to him.

She nodded, considering his words. She’s only ever heard people’s thoughts on Romeo and Juliet and everyone’s opinions are pretty much the same on that one. “I believe in fate,” he’d said. Was it fate that lead him into her library on that Thursday night? Was it fate that lead to him coming in almost every single night after that?

“I’m Harry by the way,” he added, introducing himself with a dimpled grin. Y/n’s not sure why she was finding it charming or why she’d become more endeared by him than she was several moments ago.

“And could you try to not look so surprised that I’ve read Shakespeare before?”

She frantically shook her head, stammering over her words as they quickly fell out of her mouth. “No, I’m not–I, I mean I wasn’t–I mean it’s, it’s just that–”

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll let it slide since you’re cute,” he teased, shooting her a wink. Her entire face heated up at the compliment, but she didn’t know what’s worse: how little she thought of him or how he had called her out on it. “Definitely cuter than the last library assistant. What was her name? Callie or Catherine or something like that?”

“Caitlin,” she corrects, causing Y/n to remember how she heard somewhere that she was caught with pot in her room and got kicked out of school. Whether that’s true or not, Y/n doesn't know. But she hasn’t seen Caitlin around campus since so she’s definitely not around anymore. She also found a secret stash in between some books one time which makes the rumors seem more truthful than they are not.

“Caitlin, that’s right. I liked her. She’d write papers for me sometimes if I paid her enough.”

Classy, Y/n thought to herself. She mentally rolled her eyes at his confession, finding it unsurprising. She figured this guy may have known a thing or two about a famous playwright, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t another lazy student that only tries to pass so they can keep partying every weekend. She didn’t care for guys like that and assumed that everything she found attractive about him was all on the outside.

“Anyway, I didn’t catch your name,” he said.

“That's because I didn’t give it to you,” she’d shot back, watching as his grin grew wider and he licked his lips. She wasn't aware, but he was the type that liked a challenge. He loved having to work for it.

“Guess I’ll have to call you princess from now on then.”

The pet name didn’t earn any appreciation from her, nor did it make her want to keep talking with him at that point.

“If you think I’m going to write your papers for you, you’re wrong. And your books are due in two weeks,” she told him, ignoring his subtle attempts at flirting with her. He should’ve stuck to giving her his analysis on English literature.

“I’ll be back in two weeks then.”

That’s the last thing he’d said before shooting her one last wink and leaving with his books tucked under his arm. She didn’t know what exactly to think of the guy, and he even hadn’t crossed her mind until he returned to the library again. She had hoped that she wouldn’t see him again after that, but that proved difficult since he purposely showed back up two weeks later during her late night shift. As it turned out, he wanted to continue the conversation they had when they first met, but Y/n didn’t buy it. She thought he wanted to see if he could take another shot at possibly trying to get into her pants.

She was quick to judge him though, and soon found out how wrong she was about him. Sure they don’t run in the same circles, and honestly, they still don’t, but they have a lot more in common than she was willing to give them credit for at first. It took a while, but she eventually started looking forward to his infrequent visits. And after a couple of months, the infrequent visits turned into a daily routine.

At first, he’d act as though he was coming in to find a book he wanted so it didn’t seem like he was only there for the cute, alluring, library assistant, but he soon gave up trying to hide it. Not that it wasn’t at least a little obvious to Y/n. He only ever came in when she was there, and she knows this because she took it upon herself to ask the actual librarian if she’d seen him. She told Y/n she’d never seen or heard of him before. It’s possible that she could’ve simply missed him, but before Y/n started working there Harry had only seen the inside of their library a solid two times.  

So by the time the end of the fall semester rolled she had fallen in love with her job, and by mid-February, she had fallen for him. She tried to chalk her feelings up to love being in the air and all that, but she wasn’t just enamored by his riveting smile or adorable curls. She didn’t want the four walls of the campus library to be the only place she ever saw him. She wanted to be able to be with anywhere and recite her favorite soliloquies to him or listen to him play his guitar or sing to her.

That was their thing. He loved art and music, and she loved books and poetry...and maybe even him too. She hasn’t been able to find the guts to tell him, out of fear that he might not feel the same way. If he hasn’t asked her out by now then she doubts it’s going to happen. Besides, they’re good at the whole friend thing, and there’s no way she wants to ruin that.

“Did you read the book before you wrote this paper?” She asks him one day when they’re sitting at a table in the library. They’re going over a paper he had to write over Homer’s Iliad, and she’s pretty sure the only thing he’ll get credit for is putting his name on it.

“Would you believe me if I said yes?” He responds, and she shakes her head. He groans as he takes his paper back from her, running a hand over his face and through his messy locks. He tugs slightly at them with frustration, and she places a hand on his shoulder. She gives it a soft squeeze, offering a sympathetic smile.

“I should read it shouldn't I?”

She nods, murmuring a quick “yeah” before standing up. “I’ll go find it for you.”

She slips behind the bookcases, finding the book with ease since she read it herself a while back. She hears the light pattering of footsteps behind her, and she whirls around to find that Harry has followed behind her. She gasps when she almost collides with him, the book nearly falling out of her hands.

“What’s that?” She asks when she spots a cd in his hand. He shifts back and forth on his feet, his body towering over her as he looks down at her. His face flushes at her question, a pink tint blossoming over his cheeks as he twists his lips to hide a smile from her.

“I...I made you a playlist of all my favorite songs. I thought you might listen to it while you’re reading or studying or whatever,” he tells her, shrugging nonchalantly as he wipes his hand against his jeans. It makes her realize that he’s actually nervous. She’s actually making him nervous.

She smiles fondly at him, her heart swelling at the simple gift. He could’ve just thrown all the songs onto a Spotify playlist, but he went out of his way to make her a cd.

“Thank you. I love it,” she says, wanting so badly to kiss him for it. He’s standing close enough that it would be easy. All she’d have to do is lean in, and she’d be lying if she hasn’t spent some time thinking about how his lips would feel against hers. Like the beginning of a beautiful song is what she guesses.

“How can you love it? You haven’t listened to it yet, princess.”

She rolls her eyes, playfully pushing his arm.  “Because you made it for me, silly.”  

This gets him to smile, and she swears it makes her want to melt. His fingers gently trace over her wrist, his thumb rubbing over her knuckles. Her breath hitches at the contact. She didn’t see it coming, his gaze is cast downward at where they’re touching as he pauses for a moment.

“Would you wanna go to a party with me tonight?” He finally asks once he’s racked up enough courage.  

She blinks a few times. “What?”

“I mean, you totally don’t have to if you don’t want to. My frat’s throwing one tonight, but I’d understand if that’s not your scene. I just thought it might be nice to hang out somewhere besides here,” he explains, afraid that asking her out has scared her. He’s as terrified of moving too fast as she is, and doesn’t want to assume that she likes him.

If only he knew.

“Yeah, I’d love to,” she says, wrapping her own fingers around his.

He bites his lip, bringing his other hand up to push her hair behind her ear and cup her cheek. He slowly pulls her closer to him, their noses brushing against one another’s. It tickles and a giggle escapes past her lips as her eyes flutter shut, anticipating a kiss. But his lips ghost over hers, not giving her the one thing she wants.

“Great, I’ll pick you up in couple hours?” He whispers, pulling away from her and letting her go.

She nods, not trusting herself to say anything. She can hardly breathe, and when he leaves she leans back against the shelf full of books. Her head spins, unable to process what just happened.

He asked her out.

He finally asked her out.

————

Taking a nap wasn't her smartest move, and she was dreading how little time she had to get ready. She had an outfit picked out in her mind before she even left the library, but had to quickly throw on a dress and shoes in order to focus on getting the sleep out of her hair and face. She doesn't look bad, but she did envision herself looking better for a first date. Though, going to a frat party as a first date wasn’t exactly what she had in mind either.

She slides into the passenger's seat of his car when he pulls up, immediately noticing how he ditched the dirty hoodie and fixed his hair. He looks as nice as she does, and even more handsome than he ever has in their tiny, old library.

“You clean up nice,” she compliments, taking a second to buckle her seatbelt. It’s dark but she can still see him blushing as his hand reaches for the gear to back out.

“Only when I really like the girl,” he teases. “And you look beautiful too.”

She pulls her bottom lip between her teeth, biting back a smile. Her fingers wind tighter around the sweater she grabbed on her way out, the butterflies in her stomach starting to flutter faster. Somehow she’s more nervous that she’s ever been. He’s just Harry. The guy who stops by the library more times to see her than he does to read a book and is now probably going to become her boyfriend.

Wait.

Boyfriend? Now she’s getting ahead of herself. He doesn’t want to be her boyfriend. Sure he had her a mixtape–which is undoubtedly pretty romantic–and he did ask her out, but he’s not going to become her boyfriend all of the sudden. She’s not even sure what to call what’s already going on between them.

“You want something to drink?” He asks when they arrive at the house, surrounded by hundreds of half-drunk college students and someone’s terrible playlist blasting through the giant speaker.

“Yeah,” she nods.

“Okay, stay here. I’ll be right back.”

“Wait!” she frantically grabs his arm, pulling him back to her. He glances at her, brows drawing together to show he’s confused and making her mentally slap herself for acting like a crazy person. “I’m...I’m not really comfortable being alone.”

She releases her death grip on his arm, praying that she didn’t make herself seem like a pathetic freak. She shifts uncomfortably where she stands, avoiding his gaze. But he smiles softly at her and grabs her hand, intertwining his fingers with hers.

“Alright, I won’t leave your side,” he tells her, squeezing her hand for assurance. She looks up at him, squeezing it back as a thank you.

He leads her to the kitchen, which causes an outburst from several of Harry’s friends. A blonde one comes from around to counter to pull him into a hug, engaging in some sort of handshake with him afterward. He pats him on the back, telling him that he was wondering when he was going to show up.

“I’m here now,” he tells him, stepping to the side and placing his hand on the small of Y/n’s back. “And this is Y/n.”

“Wow, Harry. You’ve always known how to pick them,” a lankier one says before winking at him.

“Is she your girlfriend? Or another one of your hookups you never intend on calling back?” Another one pipes up, tauntingly.

“No, we’re–”

“You’ve always been quite the ladies man haven’t you?” The blonde one nudges his shoulder.

Okay, his friends seem like nice people except they really don’t. But was what that one guy said true? Did he have a thing for hooking up with girls and never calling them? Was she really just another conquest to him? And if she was, why would he put so much effort into a quick screw?

“I think I’m going to go to the bathroom,” she lies, excusing herself from the awful situation. Harry calls out after her, but she doesn’t turn around and instead makes her way towards the stairs. She hurries up them, set on heading for the bathroom but stopping short upon finding something else.

To her left, a bedroom door is open slightly and inside she can see the same hoodie Harry was wearing earlier hanging off a chair. Now, she's in a house belonging to a bunch of frat boys that all play the same sport, so that doesn't mean the bedroom is his. But is that going to stop her anyway?

Absolutely not.

She presses her hand to the door, opening it further and stepping inside. The first thing she notices—besides the condom laying out on his dresser—is the Iliad laying out on his bed. So it’s definitely his room, and she definitely wasn’t expecting so many Fleetwood Mac and Pink Floyd posters. What also comes as a surprise is the bookshelf full of books, including classics like Hemingway.

“I see you got lost on your way to the bathroom,” Harry says, now leaning in doorway and watching her with a subtle smirk.

She ignores him, her fingers scanning over the spines of the books. “So you’ve got Wuthering Heights on your shelf, but you can’t get through the Iliad?”  

He shrugs. “Wuthering Heights was entertaining.”

She snorts, “Spoken like someone who didn’t understand the book.”

“Did you?”

She opens her mouth to speak, but can’t find any good way to answer because she, in fact, didn’t understand it. So that’s twice now that’s she’s not given him enough credit and put her foot in her mouth, right?

“You know this is like way overdue right?” She pulls a book off the shelf, holding it out for him to see as she points clearly at the return date sticker. He was supposed to return it a couple months ago, but she’s partly to blame for giving him a pass every time he forgets to bring his books back.

He walks over to her, one hand grabbing her waist and the other brushing her hair away from her face.

“What are you–”

“I think this is too,” he cuts her off, gently cupping her cheek with his hand and pulling her in for their lips to meet. The kiss is deep and slow, lighting up her body and she finds it hard to catch a breath. Her arms wind around his neck, her finger running themselves through his curls.

She moans when he pulls away, still keeping her body close to his. “I was wondering if you were ever going to do that,” she giggles, giving him another peck on the lips. “Could never really tell if you were into me.”

Harry nods, pinching her hips and causing her to giggle again. He could listen to that sound on repeat, like a sweet melody.

“Trust me, I am,” he says before pulling her in for one last kiss.

[chicagoindiecritics]

New from Jeff York on The Establishing Shot: MY 10 FAVORITE IMAGES FROM FILMS IN 2019

Every year at this time, I choose my 10 favorite images from films in the year. These are those particular shots that really stuck in my mind, made an impact, or became an indelible memory of the film for me. So, without any further ado, here are those ten that affected me the most. (Oh, and as always, there are spoilers ahead, so you’ve been warned.)

PARASITE The movie PARASITE, by filmmaker Bong Joon Ho, starts out as a comedy of manners. A low-class family cons their way into the home of a rich family to be caretakers of their children and household. It’s a dark comedy about the class system in Korea, but it’s really commenting on anyone’s station in life and how difficult it is to get to the next stage. Before they take over the Park family’s swank home, the Kim family thought they had it bad living in a below-ground-level apartment. Soon enough though, they’ll discover someone living a much lower existence – right there in the secret basement of the Park’s house. The little Park boy has seen him roaming the home at night, thinking it was a ghost. A flashback shows us exactly what he saw and indeed, it’s a terrifying sight. Hands down for me, it was the scariest and most memorable moment in any 2019 film.

MARRIAGE STORY My favorite scene in a movie this year is contained in Noah Baumbach’s MARRIAGE STORY. Charlie (Adam Driver) is a divorcing father, fighting his wife Nicole (Scarlett Johansson) for custody of their young son. He tries his best to impress the social worker (Martha Kelly) evaluating his worthiness one night, but then he accidentally cuts his arm with his pocketknife and tries to be nonchalant about it. As the bleeding continues, the social worker can’t help but notice. The hilarious and heartbreaking scene reaches its zenith when she can’t get the door open to exit. As Charlie watches her struggle, blood escapes down his arm, along with any chance of retaining custody. What a shot.

PORTRAIT OF A LADY ON FIRE At the end of the eighteenth century, Marianne (Noemie Merlant) is a painter, tasked with capturing the likeness of a reluctant bride-to-be named Heloise (Adele Haenel). What starts as a tempestuous relationship between artist and subject grows into friendship, then lust, and love. They bond over being outsiders, as well as similar tastes in art and literature. They find particular fascination in the story of Orpheus and Eurydice, leading to a lively discussion of why Orpheus turned around to look at his wife. As their affair ends, and Heloise’s arranged marriage beckons, she invites the exiting Marianne to turn around. Marianne does and sees her lover in her wedding dress, bringing a shocking and definitive end to their relationship, just like that of Orpheus and Eurydice. The way that director Celine Schiamma shoots the moment startles us as much as it does Marianne, finishing off the stunning image with an iris dissolve to black that makes it all positively chilling.

BOOKSMART Early BOOKSMART, Amy (Kaitlyn Dever) drives up to pick up her BFF Molly (Beanie Feldstein) for school. It’s not just a stop though, it’s an opportunity for Molly to make an entrance, and for Amy to join her in an impromptu dance celebrating their friendship. It’s sweet, nerdy, and hilarious as both are eccentrically awkward, lost together in their own little world. Director Olivia Wilde even turns off the soundtrack music halfway through their dance to reveal that the music is all in their heads.

KNIVES OUT Rian Johnson reinterpreted the all-star whodunnit for a modern era with his comedy-mystery KNIVES OUT. He twisted around Agatha Christie’s tropes with relish, yet stayed true to her mainstay of an eccentric detective. Johnson’s investigator Benoit Blanc is a Southern gentleman played to comic perfection by Daniel Craig. Johnson furthered the fun in how he introduced him. Blanc remains a blank for his first minutes of screen time, shot out-of-focus in the background behind the local cop (LaKeith Stanfield). Creating a mystery out of just who is the stranger plinking the piano keys in the background? It killed!

YESTERDAY The movie YESTERDAY isn’t a great film, but it is an intriguing one. After a strange cosmic accident, struggling musician Jack Malik (Himesh Patel) wakes from a coma to realize that in his new existence, no one has heard of the Beatles. Wanting to restore their legacy, as well as make millions singing and claiming their songs as his own, he becomes a worldwide phenomenon. So, if the Fab Four never existed, what became of the fellows who made up the band?  Jack looks up one of them, and the reveal of an older and happy artist living in the country named John Lennon (Robert Carlyle) made for a moment that transcended the one-not idea of the film. Imagine that.

CAPTAIN MARVEL The first superhero movie in the Marvel Cinematic Universe featuring a female lead was 2019’s CAPTAIN MARVEL. Brie Larson played pilot Carol Danvers (AKA Captain Marvel) in the 1980’s period piece, and in one scene, flew high into space with fellow pilot Maria (Lashana Lynch) and tagalong tabby Goose. Co-directors Anna Boden and Ryan Fleck come from the world of comedy and it shows in wonderful shots like this one where the cat just floats about, quietly enjoying zero gravity.

FORD V. FERRARI In the action-drama FORD V. FERRARI, Henry Ford II wants an American sports car to beat the Italian-made Ferrari at Le Mans in 1966. Thus, he sets out to do so with an esteemed team of designers and drivers. Ford (Tracy Letts) is a bullying S.O.B. and when designer Carroll Shelby (Matt Damon) has had enough of his attitude, he loads him up in the sports car and gives him a 120 MPH test-drive. As Shelby spins him around the dangerous track, Ford is scared shitless, weeping like a baby. It’s a sublime moment with the marvelous Letts letting go as you can see in this hilarious still.

ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD Few films this year received more water cooler discussion than Quentin Tarantino’s ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD. His story of an aging actor (Leonardo DiCaprio) and his best buddy, an aging stunt man (Brad Pitt), reckoning with the new Hollywood of 1969 was both amusing and elegiac. Age is a bitch in any walk of life, but in Tinsel Town, it’s a horror show. Pitt’s old-timer Cliff Booth is lucky to get a job stunting for the TV show THE GREEN HORNET. Still, he can’t help when the young upstart Bruce Lee (Mike Moh) brags about his prowess as a lethal weapon. Booth calls B.S. on the show’s star and they have a friendly fight. Lee scores a knockdown first, but during the second round, Cliff throws his opponent into the side of a car. It’s one of the best sight gags in a film all year, one talked about a lot at that water cooler.

I LOST MY BODY Few animated films are stranger than I LOST MY BODY. It starts with a severed hand escaping the lab where it’s being held to start on a journey of self-discovery. That means back to the body it came from, as well as the history of the owner. Naoufel, the young man who lost the appendage is a lost soul, trying to navigate his way through a difficult life. He’s such a mess, he can’t even deliver pizzas on time. One customer named Gabrielle calls him out on his shit and their conversation over the building’s intercom becomes a makeshift therapy session. As directed by Jeremy Clapin, and voiced by Dev Patel and Alia Shawkat, the simplicity of this static shot becomes mesmerizing in its simplicity and intimacy. It proves that stillness, even in animation, can be more moving than any action.

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[wordsandshawn]

The Platonic Series ~ Co-Parenting

(2025)

“Ella, how was school today?” You question, looking into the rear view mirror at your seven year old daughter sitting in the backseat. 

She’s still staring out the window as she answers, “Good.”

“Did you learn anything new?” You ask her. 

“Yes, co-parenting.” She answers, and you’re immediately confused. Since when did they start teaching about co-parenting in the second grade?

“You learned that at school?”

“Timmy told me about it. His parents co-parent. And so I told him mine did too.” She says it so nonchalantly, you’re not even sure what to think at first. 

This makes you raise your eyebrows. “Baby, do you know what co-parenting is?” You ask, confused, since her dad has not been in her life at all these past seven years. He had made it clear he wasn’t ready for a baby before she was born, and even though seven years have passed, apparently nothing has changed. She doesn't ask about him often, but you’ve always been honest with her about him. She knows you had her when you were in college and that you aren’t with her dad anymore, that you haven’t been with her dad since before you knew about her. 

“Yeah, its when you have two houses and you live at both.” She tells you, as though its that simple.

You kind of have an idea where she’s going with this, so you try to clear up any confusion by telling her, “It’s when you have two parents that don’t live together but that both parent you.”

“I know, mom.” She says sassily. Seven year old sass was something you weren’t prepared for and you didn’t expect. Shawn says its part of her personality, but you’re not too sure, and you’re already dreading the teenaged years that are unavoidable. 

You don’t really want to remind her that she doesn’t know her dad, so there is no coparenting between her parents. Since you don’t respond right away, she explains, “Timmy said he was cool because he gets to go with his dad on the weekends. And he was being mean about it, so I told him that I go with my dad on the weekends too but that my dad’s house is cooler than his because I have my own bunk bed and there’s a pool, and I get to have ice cream whenever I want because my daddy always buys my favorite ice cream and he lets me eat as much as I want.” She rambles, but then her eyes get wide and she slaps her hand over her mouth.

You know exactly who she’s talking about. “You eat ice cream whenever you want at Shawn’s?” You question.

“No mommy, I wasn’t supposed to tell you!” She shouts. 

“I’m going to talk to Shawn about that, but more importantly, baby, you’re not supposed to lie.”

“Its not a lie mom. Only a small one.” She tells you, holding up her index and thumb close together to show just how small of a lie it is. “He was being mean.” She whines as though it justifies everything.

“Even if he was being mean, you shouldn’t lie to seem cooler.” You remind her.

“But mommy, its not really a lie.” She repeats herself.

And now you're torn on how to react. The only real lie she told was telling the kid that Shawn was her dad. Everything else, the pool, the bunk bed, and now you know, the ice cream, is all true.

"Okay, hunny, but you know that you're not supposed to lie." You remind her one last time.

"Yes, I know, Mom." She says.

And you nod, asking more about her day, and soon she's off rambling about an art project they worked on. You talk with her the rest of the ride back to your apartment, but that first conversation never leaves you mind.

You make Ella a snack when you arrive back home because she's always hungry when she finishes school. Just as you put the apple slices on the plate, your phone starts to ring.

"Hello?" You answer, holding it to your ear as you hand Ella the plate. She takes it and starts munching on an apple.

"Hey y/n, I just got back home. Are you home? I have the night off but Katie got called into work so I thought I'd come chill with you two?" He says through the phone. Katie is his girlfriend. They've been together for a year now, and its been really nice because you two get along well. You can't say the same thing for some of Shawn's other girlfriends.

"Yeah, we’re home. Come over because I have to talk to you about something anyway." You ask.

"What do you have to talk to me about?" He questions.

"I'll just talk to you when you get here."

"I have to shower and stuff but I'll be over before dinner. Are you cooking or should I pick up food on the way?"

You tell him you're cooking and that you'll see him when he comes before saying goodbye.

You're just starting dinner when Shawn walks in the door, not bothering to knock. Ella jumps out of the chair she was sitting in and runs straight for Shawn, meeting him before he takes two steps into the house. He picks her up even though she's getting too big to be carried like that.

"Hey, Ella!" He says, holding her tightly. He hugs her before putting her down, and coming over to give you a hug as well.

"What did you wanna talk about?" He asks.

"Ella, go watch tv, while I talk to Shawn, okay?" She nods, running off into the living room. You wait unntil you hear the tv turn on before saying.

"Well first, a little birdie told me that you let her have ice cream whenever she wants." 

He laughs a bit, "She wasn't supposed to tell. We had a deal." He says with a smile, but no remorse.

"Shawn, you can't just give her ice cream whenever." You chastise him. 

"Honestly, she doesn't have it that often." He shrugs.

"She's got you wrapped around her finger." You remark, rolling your eyes.

He smiles guiltily, just shrugging because it's true, and he can't deny it.

"What I really wanted to tell you was something Ella told me on the car ride home today. It was about co-parenting."

He raises his eyebrows at the word, "What about it?"

"Her friend’s parents are divorced. She thinks this is the same thing. She thinks we co-parent."

He's silent for a minute, but then he says nonchalantly, "Well we kind of do." He’s obviously not concerned or even caught off guard by this piece of news. He sees your expression, so he asks, “Is that a bad thing?” 

“No,” You say, then add, “I don’t know. Is it?”

He shrugs. “I don’t know why it would be.”

You sigh loudly then honestly respond, “I guess its just so different from the life I would have imagined for my daughter. Not that its bad.” You quickly add, not wanting to offend Shawn. “You’re so good to her, to us. You’ve always been there for us, and I’m so glad that she has you, and that you watch her so much for me. I just don’t want to confuse her.”

“You’re my best friend, of course I'd be there for you. And Ella, you know I love that kid. I know she’s not mine, but I don’t think she's so far off about the co-parenting thing.” 

“She called you her dad. To the kid with the divorced parents. She told him she goes to her dad’s house on the weekend, and that her dad is better than his.” 

Shawn’s eyes get wide at this. You’re not sure how you expect him to react. This whole thing is weird the more you think about it. She doesn’t know her real dad, but she’s spent most weekends at Shawn’s place since she was two years old, which was when Shawn moved to a place ten minutes from yours and you went back to college, meaning that you had to work weekends to support you and Ella. 

Since Ella was two, Shawn has been around a lot more, purposely trying to work closer to home. If you’re being honest with yourself, Shawn has done just as much raising Ella as you have these past five years. He’s taken on far more responsibility than would be considered normal in a situation like yours. The truth is you needed someone to help you figure out how to parent and to help you make decisions when it came to Ella. That someone just so happened to be Shawn. And despite the fact that his career kept him one the road a lot when Ella was an infant, he was still right there beside you for all the parenting, if not in proximity, he still remained close because you’d always be texting and calling him. 

“She said I was better than his dad?” Shawn questions, obviously not focusing on the part that you were. 

“Yes, but thats not the point.” 

“Y/n, you’re over thinking all of this.” He says gently. “Ella has people that love her. Lots of people, and she knows that. It doesn’t matter that she doesn’t know her real dad. Its his loss, not hers. If she wants to call me her dad to a little punk, thats fine with me. Because even though I'm not her dad or even her stepdad, you’re my best friend and I’m always going to be here for both of you. The labels don’t matter. What another seven year old kid thinks doesn’t matter.” 

You know Shawn is right, about all of it. You’ve always struggled at least a little bit with the fact that Ella doesn’t know her dad and that her dad doesn’t want to know her. You never know how to explain it to her. You don’t want her to ever feel like she’s not wanted. That’s your greatest fear. 

“She asks about him sometimes.” Shawn tells you, and your attention snaps back to him. 

“What?” You question, alarmed, because you didn’t know that. She rarely asks about him. She’s only ever said anything about her dad to you maybe twice. When she was finally old enough to understand some things, you explained to her that her dad wasn’t in your life before you found out about her, and she never pressured you for information. 

“Yeah, she asks about him sometimes. She’s a smart kid, y/n. She knows things.” 

“What does she ask?” 

“Sometimes she just talks about how most people have two parents, but she doesn’t.”

“What do you tell her?”

“I just tell her that she has a mom that loves her, and I love her, and that if she wants to know her dad she can when she gets older, but for right now all she needs is know is that we love her.”

You lean forward, resting your elbows on the countertop and burying your face in your hands.   

“Hey, y/n,” Shawn’s voice pulls you back to the conversation at hand, and away from pondering the mistakes you’ve made in the past and the way they’re affecting your daughter. “You’re doing the best you can. You’re an amazing mom to Ella, and she’s an amazing kid.”  

“Thanks,” You say, brushing off the compliment. 

“I’m serious, y/n. I’m the lucky one that gets to be in both of your lives, and he’s the one missing out because he’s not around.”

Shawn’s making you feel a better, something Shawn does best. “Thanks Shawn, I guess she was kind of right about the coparenting thing.” 

“I only took it as a compliment.” He reassures you. 

“That’s good. But please stop feeding my child ice cream whenever she wants.”

Shawn laughs lightly. “Okay, mom. No more ice cream whenever she wants. But once a weekend is not too much.” 

That you can’t argue with, “Fine,” You respond right as you hear Ella’s voice from the living room.

“Shawn!” She shouts. 

“She missed you,” You tell him, “I’ll call you both when dinners ready.” 

“You’re the best, y/n.” He says, before leaving the kitchen to go and spend some time with Ella. 

[purplesurveys]

451

1. Do you like Ferrero Rocher chocolate?: Yeah I could probs eat a whole box by myself. I mean it is way too hyped, and the attention is unnecessary, but I like it nonetheless. 2. What’s the most expensive thing your car needed to get done?: It hasn’t been seriously damaged so nothing huge...maybe just oil changes. 3. If you had a thousand dollars to spend on a pricey brand you like but can’t really afford (until now of course), which ONE brand would you chose?: Michael Kors sneakers. They’re not super pricey but they still cost a bit for a pair of sneakers, so I’d loooove to have one for myself.

4. Do you still own any clothes you had in middle school? Like what?: NO. I threw up them out years ago. Fortunately–my middle school wardrobe was barf-worthy. 5. Do you like candy canes?: Yeah but it’s only super exciting to eat them during Christmas. I’m never in the mood for them if it’s a different time of the year.

6. What genre was the last movie you saw? And was it any good?: Revolutionary Road is romantic drama. It’s one of my favorite films; it’s really, really good but it’s the kind of piece you’ll have to emotionally prepare for because it’s so heavy.

7. Do you think George Clooney was hot when he was younger?: He’s attractive then and now.  8. …what about now?: ^ 9. How many pairs of flip flops do you own?: Two or three. I don’t keep track because I hate flip flops, the thongs make my feet bleed all the time :/ 10. How old were you when you got your first Tumblr/LJ?: I made a Tumblr for the first time in like May 2010, so I had just turned 12. 11. Remember Teen Ink? Did you ever submit anything to them?: Never heard of it. 12. Do you still talk to any of your old teachers?: Not anymore. I keep in touch with some but only barely – that’s to say I’m still friends with them on Facebook/following them on Twitter, but that’s it. I don’t talk to them, except for one who’s a little cooler and more understanding than the rest of the more conservative teachers I had. 3. Do you have Twitter? What do you mostly use it for?: Yes, it’s my favorite social media. That’s where I put everything – life, feelings, annoyances, sad stuff, fangirling, talking to my friends. 14. What color is your cell phone?: Space gray. 15. How many cell phones have you had in your lifetime?: 7. 16. Does your family still use the home phone or are you all on cell phones now?: Yes. The older generation and even company offices will still prefer landline so it’s common to see home phones everywhere. 17. How old were you when you got your first cell phone?: I had mine on my 7th birthday. The kids around me were starting to get their own phones and I got super envious, so it was what I asked for. Looking back, it’s an insanely young age to get a phone and I probably wouldn’t do the same for my kids. 18. Enough with the phones. When is/was your 21st birthday?: This year! 19. What color was the dress you wore to your senior prom?: I didn’t have a senior prom. My prom was in junior year and it was a shade of gold/beige; I don’t really remember. I hated prom and I deleted all photos and memories from that night. I was also invited to a senior ball though and for that night I had a royal blue gown. 20. Ever go to another school’s prom?: Not prom, but another school’s senior ball. 21. Ever take melatonin supplements to help you go to sleep?: Nope. 22. Do you like burning candles or incense?: I’d enjoy it if I encountered them, but I don’t buy them for myself or know anyone who uses them regularly. 23. Do you like doing laundry?: My mom prefers to do everyone’s laundry by herself and it kinda frustrates me cos I want her to start like, teaching me or something so I’ll know how to do it when the time comes. She’s not though, so I guess I’ll have to teach myself. 24. Ever throw a pair of your shoes in the washing machine? How did they come out?: No. Is that allowed??? 25. Do you own a real pair of Uggs?: No. 26. Do you ever venture into the woods? What do you normally do in there?: No. I live nowhere near the woods. 27. Favorite pizza toppings?: Barbecue sauce, chicken bits, any kind of cheese. 28. Favorite salad dressing?: I don’t really mix and match with salads so the classic caesar dressing will do (cos it’s all I know hahaha). 29. What’s the most you’d spend on a new pair of jeans?: P2,000. Google says that’s equal to more or less $38.60. 30. Do you like to wear shorts or capris in the summer?: YES. I need to wear airy, short stuff in the summer because otherwise I’d feel constricted and hot and I would be very pissy. 31. What do you think of Bermuda shorts?: Not my style. 32. What does your bathing suit look like this year?: It’s an all-black two-piece that just looks super cute on me hahaha. 33. Are you ready for summer 2018?: It’s 2019 now but I remember being meh about that summer. I enrolled in a midyear term to keep getting allowance from my parents lol, but I never wanted to go to school then, so I was still a bit miserable. 34. Did you ever use iconator.com? Are you upset that it’s gone now?: I don’t think I recognize that. 35. Speaking of AIM icons… do you still use AIM?: Isn’t it dead? 36. Do you still buy CDs?: Not anymore. The last one I got was either Paramore’s self-titled or One Direction’s Midnight Memories. Both came out in 2013 so I don’t remember which one I bought last. 37. Be honest…how much of the music in your iTunes library did you actually pay for?: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA NONE. YouTube to MP3 was my lifeblood back then, along with the habit of downloading album art from Google Images to match to the songs so that my playlists looked legit. 38. Does your significant other ever make you mix CDs?: No, because that’s not a thing anymore. Gabie did make me a couple of personalized playlists during our first months together. 39. How often do you have to empty your text inbox because it got full?: My inbox never gets full. 40. Does your phone have a keyboard, touch screen, or neither?: Touch screen. 41. How did you dress your freshman year of high school?: I was peak wrestling fan back then so I liked wearing wrestling shirts paired with jeans, and Chucks because AJ Lee was into those. Pretty straightforward. 42. What religion are you?: I’m a frustrated atheist. 43. What color are the pajama pants you wore last?: I don’t wear pajamas to bed. 44. Were you obsessed with the Spice Girls back in the day?: I was never into them, and the only songs I know are their popular ones so I really couldn’t be any less interested. 45. What does your wallet look like?: It’s pink and has three main sections. First is for bills, second is for coins, and the third is for random receipts, papers, and extra 1x1/2x2 photos. There’s a slot for cards as well so I have my license and Starbucks and arcade cards in there, as well as several business cards I’ve been handed in the past. 46. Is your middle name embarrassing?: Not at all. I love the name Isabelle. 47. How many Facebook friends do you have? Do you add people you don’t know sometimes?: 450+. No. 48. Do you like pumpkin pie?: I’ve never tasted one. 49. What’s your favorite kind of yogurt?: I hate yogurt. 50. Do you like frozen yogurt?: ^

[losersincollege]

[Archived/Retired Log]

Saturday, 09/01, Pregames in Rooms 222, 221 & 204 (All Characters, Different Places) 

Authors/About

Setting the Scene: Richie and Bill invite Bev and Patty over for some party pregaming. Meanwhile, across the hall, Ben and Mike decide to be social. Elsewhere, Stan and Eddie get some vodka to take the edge off.

Word Count: 3,100+ ; Warnings: under 21 drinking

Richie had texted Patty earlier about coming over to pregame before a frat party they were invited to by a cast member who is in the fraternity, which Richie will now mercilessly make fun of him for. He and Bill are just waiting for Patty and her roommate, but he is already feeling antsy, so he grabs two beers, handing one to Bill.

“Happy first official college weekend, Big Bill!”

[[THIS LOG IS NO LONGER CANON TO THE RP]]

.

“I’ll cheers to that.” Bill opens the beer and starts drinking, as one does.

.

Richie does the same. “I think you’ll really like Patty. She’s so fucking nice. We are already jiving really well as cast members.”

.

“I’m excited to meet her. And her roommate,” Bill says.

.

Patty had stressed most of the day about what to wear to this party, but in the end she decides on her favorite yellow sundress. Now, with a pack of coolers under her arm that she had gotten one of her older classmates to buy for her, she and Bev walk down the hall to Richie’s room.

“You’ll know Richie when you see him, and his roommate is named Bill,” Patty says to Bev as she knocks on his door, a small smile on her face.

.

Bev starts piecing two and two together - the Richie she met buying coffee is also a theater major, so that’s probably who invited them over. "Richie... as in tall kid with dark curly hair and huge glasses?"

.

Richie opens the door before Patty can answer. "Stage wife!" He smiles at her and gives her a huge hug, then sees the girl next to her. "GASP! And Bev! You’re roommates?!" He pulls Beverly into a hug as well. "Come on in friends!"

.

"Hey Richie!" Bev is instantly excited to see him open the door, since he seems like he knows how to have a fun time. Maybe this pregame is going to be more fun than she’d expected.

.

Bill watches them walk in, feeling awkward that the three of them already know each other and he’s the odd one out. “Uhh... hi, I’m Bill.” He’s just awkwardly standing there with his beer.

.

Richie grins. “Ladies, this is my awesome roommate, Big Bill. No, the nickname is not a sexual euphemism. It’s a reference to his ego.”

.

Bill won’t deny it, he’s definitely not happy with Richie’s dig at his size. “How would you know my dick size, Richie? Have you been sneaking peeks at me?”

.

Patty smiles widely at the fact that Beverly and Richie know each other, glad to have gotten that bit of awkwardness out of the way, if there even was any to begin with. She turns to Bill, placing her pack of four coolers down on the closest desk. "Nice to meet you, Bill. I'm Patty, aka Richie's stage wife," she jokes.

.

Bill turns to the girls, since they seem like they won’t make fun of him. “It’s nice to meet you, Patty. And... Bev?” He hopes he got her name right.

.

Bev tries to hide away her laughter at Richie's comment by smiling off to the side. She turns to face Bill. "Yeah, it's Beverly actually, but Bev is alright too."

.

“Bev, did Patty tell you we are in the musical together? It’s going to be so fun,” Richie says.

.

Patty nods. “She was the first person I told! Then my parents of course.” She laughs, regretting bringing up her parents, only because she's worried it sounds lame that she has no other friends to tell.

“What are you studying, Bill?” she asks, changing the subject.

.

“I’m majoring in English and minoring in Studio Art.” Bill doesn’t want to ask her major, since he’s pretty sure it’s theatre, but he doesn’t want to be considered rude, either, so he does. “You’re a theatre major, right?”

.

"Yeah! But that’s it for me. I don't know if I could handle a minor, but Studio Art sounds interesting," Patty says with a smile, opening one of her pomegranate coolers and taking a sip. She wishes she could've put it in a fridge, but it’s still good nonetheless. She passes one to Beverly, too.

.

“It is, I really like art,” Bill says, and sips his beer. “What’s your major, Beverly?”

.

“I’m a music major,” Bev answers as she opens her drink. She is reminded of how tedious her classes seemed this week and figures it’s going to be a long year. “It’s alright.” She shrugs and takes a swig of her cooler.

.

Richie nods. “I TA one of Bev’s classes. Professor is kinda incompetent. I have a feeling he’s going to make me teach it soon so he doesn’t have to come in. Which really, no one is gonna want.” He downs his drink and shoots a text to Eddie seeing what he is up to.

They spend another thirty minutes drinking and playing Never-Have-I-Ever, which Richie and Beverly lose pretty quickly. Then, Richie pours them all a few shots to get a nice buzz going. By the time the group takes off for the party together, he is certainly feeling the warmth of drunkenness spread through him at an alarming rate.

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((Earlier, across the hall…))

The week's finally over for Ben, and he's not sure how to feel about it. Some pretty strange things had happened, but also some good, and the peculiar sensation that’s been present throughout the week still lingers in his body and mind.

"So, how was your week, Mike?" he asks from his bed, one hand behind his head and the other throwing a stress ball up in the air and catching it over and over.

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After spending the evening bored and watching conspiracy videos, Mike looks up from his laptop and takes out his earphones. "Hm? Oh, uh. It was okay."

A brief overview of the past few days flashes through his head; it had certainly been an eventful first week, compared to the previous two years. It has left him feeling more than a little unsettled, honestly, with a constant headache that won't go away. "...Well, I dunno. Interesting is a better word. What about you?"

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"Yeah, interesting is a good word for mine, too." Ben continues mindlessly playing with the stress ball. "Do you have any plans for this weekend? I mean, the day is practically over but, you know."

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Now fully interrupted from watching his conspiracies, Mike shuts his laptop and rests his chin on his hand. "Well… not really. There's this party Richie keeps going on about, but I'm not about to go alone. I don't do well at parties."

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"You mean our neighbor, Richie Tozier?" Ben stops throwing the ball and looks at Mike. "Well, I'm not good with parties either."

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"Yeah, our good ol' neighbor Richie Tozier," Mike chuckles, then sighs. "Well, I'm bored. And he’s gonna be there, Bill’s gonna be there.., so we’ll know people. We can go check it out together. First party of the semester, maybe it won't be too crazy."

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Ben needs a moment to think about it. He's not very fond of parties, not since the last college he went to, so he's not sure he's ready for them again. But something inside of him tells him he needs to go, like that's what is supposed to happen. And since he'll go with Mike, he figures it's not such a bad idea after all. If anything, he'll be able to get a few drinks for free.

He sits up on the bed. "Sure, we can go check it out. If it's too crazy we just leave, right?" He smiles. "It could be fun. And you'll see this Bill guy, so that's good too."

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"But do I want to see that side of him?" Mike laughs, then hops off the bed to put on a more party appropriate shirt. "But yeah, we can just leave. I’ve never gone to the first party of the year before, I feel like I'll regret it if I skip this one too."

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Ben smiles at Mike and goes to put his brown jacket on. "Yeah, it's an experience. Do you want to go get something to eat first though? It's still early."

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Mike checks the clock on the wall as he puts his hoodie on. "Yep, guess we can. Good to go?"

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Ben grabs his wallet and opens the door. "Yeah, let's go."

They both leave the room and end up eating at a nearby Chinese restaurant. They spend some time there, then go back to their dorm to shower before heading to the party.

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((Meanwhile, elsewhere…))

Eddie is lying on his bed, feeling nervous about the upcoming party. He hardly knows anyone on this campus, and he's nervous about potentially seeing Richie in that kind of setting. The smart thing to do would be to avoid drinking all that much, so as to maintain the impression of being someone who has their shit together. But instead...

"Hey Stan, do you have anything we could drink before going out later?"

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Stan shakes his head, not really having any alcohol on him. He rolls over on his own bed to make himself more comfortable while talking to Eddie. "We could try to get someone to buy some for us. Or... getting something more expensive could work. They don't always ID when you don't buy the cheap stuff."

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"You have the money for that?" Eddie looks over, raising his eyebrows.

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"Yeah, I still have some saved money with me." Stan nods, supporting himself on his forearms.

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Eddie sits up. "Okay, let's go then. I can't show up to a frat party completely sober, I'd walk in and immediately have an asthma attack."

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"Yeah, we definitely don't want you to start freaking out there," Stan agrees, looking over at Eddie. "What we need to do is to just try to wing it by buying something expensive, confidently."

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Eddie takes out his phone and searches up nearby liquor stores. "You think it's better to go somewhere a little further away from campus?"

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"Yeah, let's go on a little walk and look for liquor stores that are a bit further away," Stan says.

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"You want to walk far away?" Eddie lets out a little groan. "I thought you had a car!"

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"Yeah, right… I'll drive us to the store,” Stan replies. “Not to the party, though, let's be responsible."

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"Uh, yeah, duh." Eddie stands up and stretches a bit. "It's way too early to go to the party anyway, the point is to come back here and get started. Then we can walk over there later, good to go."

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Stan nods in approval of this plan. The little pregame will get rid of some anxiety so that actually arriving at the party will be easier for them

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"Okay let's go!" Eddie waits for Stan to get up and ready, and they head outside to Stan's car. He brings his old NYC fake just in case Stan's plan doesn't work, but he's not sure Maine would even accept an out of state ID even if it was real. The first thing he notices about Stan's car upon arrival is that it is very clean, which he promptly points out as though Stan wouldn't already know. "Wow, your car is so clean!"

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"I'm not going to drive in a dirty car. What am I, some kind of heathen? Have you heard of those people who have special car bottles just for pissing in? Just imagine that, ew.” Stan makes a face as he gets into the car. “And, besides, my father would kill me for ruining her."

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Eddie gets settled in the passenger seat before asking, "Her?"

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"Her. That's how he refers to the car." Stan shrugs.

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"Okay, that's cool,” Eddie says as he buckles his seatbelt. “And yeah, piss bottles - I wouldn't trust anyone whose car has open containers with yellow liquid inside, honestly."

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Stan puts his seatbelt on as well. In no time, they're on their way off campus.

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Eddie sets up the GPS on his phone to take them to a liquor store that is nearby, but not so close that the clerk will assume they're students. As they drive, he opens the passenger window and leans his elbow on the door. "What kind of alcohol are we getting?"

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"Some expensive vodka, I think. The cheap ones are terrible." Stan rolls his eyes at the memory of this one disgusting vodka he’s had before.

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"Yeah... true. But how expensive? I don't have a whole lot of money to pay you back with,” Eddie says with uncertainty. “Can we settle somewhere in between?"

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Stan nods. He wasn't planning to get them the most expensive vodka he could find in the store, after all. "Well find something fancy enough that will fit right into our budget.”

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When they arrive at the liquor store, Eddie fishes some money out of his wallet and gives it to Stan, hoping it will cover his half of the cost. "Umm, I should probably wait in the car. I still get carded for R-rated movies sometimes."

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Stan can’t help but snort, since he can't imagine anyone giving Eddie alcohol. Him going inside definitely won't work. The other option is Stan going in by himself to play a little pretend and get the more expensive booze, as planned.

He leaves the car and walks into the liquor store, immediately getting all of the attention on himself. ‘Shit.’ He bites his cheek, but his expression stays unimpressed. Pushing all the anxiety away, he goes up to the cashier and instructs her to bring him something from the top shelf that isn’t too expensive. After a short conversation, in which Stan tries his best to pass as an expert, he manages to get a bottle of Grey Goose.

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Eddie takes the brown paper bag from Stan when he returns to the car and pulls the bottle out to see what kind it is. Admittedly, Grey Goose is a pretty nice vodka that goes down smoothly, but he can't help but laugh at the bottle’s design. "Did you pick this because of the birds...?"

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Stan sends him a little smile as he turns on the car's engine. "Yeah, I thought that it's not only good quality, but also pretty cute." If they're going to pregame, they should at least do it in style.

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Eddie is not about to argue with that logic. Aesthetic matters, after all.

When they get back to campus, they drop the bottle and other supplies they picked up off in their room before heading to the dining hall for a quick dinner, since it’s always a bad idea to get wasted on an empty stomach. Once they are back in the room it’s nearly eight o’clock, which leaves plenty of time to get a head start before this party. “Hmm, you don’t happen to have shot glasses, do you? Or should we make real drinks instead?”

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"Uh, no, didn't really think of getting any." Stan looks at his watch, checking the time. "We could make real drinks, to be honest. We have time."

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Eddie goes over to the cabinet that is built in next to his closet and comes back a few seconds later with two cheap plastic cups. He pours a liberal amount of Grey Goose into each cup, and then takes the bottle of cranberry juice they bought on the way home, and fills the rest up with that. Grinning, he hands one cup to Stan, glad that they are starting to find common ground and feeling more comfortable around each other. "Cheers."

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Stan raises the cup and nods slightly. "Cheers." He takes the first sip, not really wincing when the alcohol gently stings his throat. Well, after all, it isn't some cheap ass vodka and it’s mixed with juice.

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About an hour later, Eddie and Stan are on drink number three and Eddie, at least, is starting to feel more than a little buzzed. He checks his phone while ranting about how boring his business classes are going to be and sees a new text from Richie, at which point he stops talking mid-sentence and sits up straight as he types a response.

"Oh, he just texted me - the guy I told you about!" A few seconds pass until Richie texts him again. "He says he's pregaming before a party, too."

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Stan nods, knowing well that he won't be able to avoid Eddie's friend, no matter what. Besides, he kind of volunteered as a wingman, so he can't complain now. "Good. That means it’ll go better, because it won't be that awkward. Or it could still end in disaster."

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"So 'not that awkward' and 'disaster' are my only options?" Eddie laughs and turns his attention back to his phone.

A few minutes pass, and chatting with Stan in this tipsy state causes Eddie to ask Richie what his favorite bird is, thinking that maybe he could get a head start on Stan's character assessment. "Hey, what does it say about him that his favorite bird is a toucan?"

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Stan gives Eddie a weird look, not quite sure how exactly to respond to that question. There are some things he could say about people based on their favorite birds, but toucans? "Uh, that he's into big beaks? They’re pretty restless, and tricksters."

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"Well he has a big mouth and seems pretty restless to me. So maybe he just relates to them. Or eats a lot of Fruit Loops." Eddie continues to text Richie, and a few minutes pass by.

"Stan, can I tell you something?" he asks suddenly, and does not wait for a response before continuing. "At my first college, I wasn't so good at impulse control, and I made some stupid decisions. I always got involved with guys who I thought were funny and cool but turned out to be assholes. My only goal this year is to not be like that. But I'm worried that Richie is the same thing all over again, and I'm stupidly just... falling for it, like I haven't learned anything."

He frowns, and his phone buzzes, but he continues to look at Stan. "So just please, like, do me a favor and keep an eye out tonight. Stop me if I get too drunk and it looks like I'm on the verge of being stupid."

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Stan listens to him, nodding. Agreeing to look after Eddie comes easy to him and he sends the other boy a small, reassuring smile. "Sure, I'll keep an eye on you and make sure you don't make a fool out of yourself, Eddie," he says in a light, slightly teasing tone.

He raises his cup again. "Let's drink to that toucan guy not turning out to be a fucking asshole. Because I'm not too good at beating people up, and not a fan of that in general."

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Eddie laughs, raising his cup as well. "And let's hope that your Library Girl is there, too, and that she ends up being nice."

They down the remainder of their drinks, then do some finishing touches to get ready for the party. A few minutes later, they are outside and on their way to the frat house.

[[Continue on to Richie & Eddie’s Texts or the Losers’ arrival at the party]]

[[THIS LOG IS NO LONGER CANON TO THE RP]]