#and it makes me sad how cynical i am of the oversaturated capitalist media | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

spiltcandycoatedpunkblood · 2 years

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maybe there's sort of like a grimy look and feel to them that i get? it's more haunting, especially from a perspective of now. i'm sad about a lot of things that happened years ago to me. i guess it's kinda soothing??

#i always easily become super interested in things with high emotions #which also means super sensitivity #which weirdly still made me seek out stuff that got me morbidly fascinated with it #considering i didn't find out a lot of traumatic shit that i was protected from by my parents #it makes a particular kind of sense that despite my sensitivity i still sought out this stuff #because i hated feeling so naive and sheltered and oversensitive #and honestly so much of the stuff i've grown to love as a result #of course in other ways #this led to stuff i end up talking about in therapy #always makes me think #horror #films #vintage stuff often makes me feel a lot more for the past i guess #and it makes me sad how cynical i am of the oversaturated capitalist media #that i realise how upset i am at how close and yet so far away the traumatic events in my life are #and that i will never be able to change them #the worst feelings comes from this shit happening in my teenage years #my young pivotal teenage years #my youth #everything just spills out more and more every day #it's all so scary and real #personal #trauma #mental illness #abuse tw #rant

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