#and it flooded a couple other times. but on Saturday it flooded so badly that I filled up the shopvac 3x

[mearcatsreturns]

The plumbers and workmen are here taking out the sink and part of my cabinets. Hopefully this will finally, FINALLY fix with my kitchen flooding issues. Cross your fingers for me!

[distastefullydelightful]

It's a Saturday night. You're dressed like a cheap bimbo fuckdoll, as instructed. Knowing how adventurous we are, you assumed I might take you to a fancy club to parade you around. We've been driving for a while now, however, and as we depart the city, it begins to dawn on you - I've got something else in store for you tonight. Eventually, we pull off the tarred road onto some gravel. As it crunches beneath the tyres you see a dimly-lit structure ahead. You notice the dull red glow of a number of breaklights in the dark. I hand your "cumdump" collar to you.

"Put this on", I say. I then fasten a leash to it, and lead you inside. Your heart is pounding. You're thrilled and you're nervous. You're overwhelmed and you're wet. And you have questions, none of which I answer.

And here we are. In this derelict public bathroom off the side of some underused road in the middle of nowhere.

"It's time to get on your knees, slut", I command. I then proceed to take a couple small video recorders out my pocket, placing them on surfaces around the bathroom, all pointing towards where you're kneeling. Your pussy is throbbing by now. You have a sense of what's coming, but the fact that I won't answer your questions also has you a bit unnerved. I switch the cameras on, walk behind you, and start unbuckling my belt.

"You're my filthy fucking whore, aren't you?"

"Yes daddy, I'm your filthy fucking whore."

"Well then, it's time you got treated as such. And it's time the world saw you for the fuckmeat you truly are."

As you whimper, I lift your skirt up, pull your skimpy thong to the side and slide my hard dick into your slippery cunt.

You notice footsteps and murmuring outside, and you make your nervousness known to me. But I put my hand around your throat and hold you down as I start to pound away, faster and faster. A man walks into the room, and immediately motions for the other five to follow. As I pound away at your slippery pussy, I hold your head to make you look them in the eyes.

"Tell them what you are, slut!"

As you bite your lip and whimper, you manage to explain that you're a slutty little cum bucket. They grin excitedly. You're a pretty girl and you look like a street hooker. This is going to be fun. As they unbuckle their belts and start to approach us, I unload deep inside of you. You feel the familiar feeling of my cum flooding out your cunt.

"Clean up your mess, you filthy fucking whore".

You turn around to lick up the cum. But just as you're about to, I tug the leash to look up at me.

"Ask them for permission" I say, motioning toward the group of strange men amassed from advertising your cumdump holes on the internet. They're here to use you as fuckmeat, and you know you have no choice but to give them all kinds of power over you.

The thought of it, on some level, disgusts you. How has it come to this? Are you really going to ask strange old men for permission to lick up the cum which has just dripped from your pussy on some dirty bathroom floor? And yet, you crave this. You're deeply depraved, and it's moments like this when you're forced to confront it.

"Can I eat the tasty cum please, sirs?" you ask. You can't even imagine if anyone you knew saw you like this. You'd be mortified. But right now, it feels so fucking right. You want it so badly and reason has long departed.

Turns out, they're a tough crowd. "Why should we let you? Tell us what you are and why you need it, you pathetic fucking slut" a particularly confident one barks. You know he has no right to speak to you that way but your pussy is aching as a result. You're fuckmeat to him. He doesn't respect you and he doesn't even see you as a real person. And as much as that should revolt you, you want him to show you your place.

You look onto the floor to see this small puddle of cum slowly starting to spread into the cracks between the tiles. You feel humiliated and pathetic. But you just fucking want it. Your pussy is taking over your mind, and you're aware of it happening but incapable of doing anything about it, even if you wanted to.

I answer the man before you even can. "Because she's a good whore and she'll take you all tonight. But she needs to prove to all of you that she can. Eat the fucking cum, slut."

And you do. You feel the cold tiles on your tongue. The reality of your behavior dawns on you, but the more disgusted you are in yourself, the more turned on you become. As you eagerly lick the floor cleaner than its been in months, you feel another dick enter you. It's the confident one. He's thick and raw inside of you, and he's not looking to take it easy. He slaps your ass, pulls your hair, and verbally degrades you. Part of you wants me to come to your defence when he treats you like a cheap disposable slut, but the fact that I join him in the degradation sends you over the edge into mindless whore bliss. As you cum, you feel him emptying himself inside of you. He dismounts you with a few more condescending words and forcefully shoves his dick into your mouth to clean it.

You can feel his cum start to stream from your pussy too. It's overflowing. "You're making a mess again. You know what to do." After polishing his cock with your tongue you move back a few paces until you can lick the new cum puddle up. Shortly after beginning, you feel a new dick slide inside your cum-lubricated pussy.

And so the night unfolds...you're there on this dirty floor, looking like a cheap whore, licking the cum off the floor as it floods from your pussy. After each load is deposited into you, you move back a meter or so, to lick up the cum that dripped from your pussy as the next guy mounts you and fills you up.

Over the next two hours, each of the 7 men in the room have deposited their deed into your fertile young pussy at least twice. Your thighs are glistening with it and you're a sticky mess.

As the men start to depart and you finally stand up again, you notice me switching the video cameras off. You'd forgotten they were even there. "I'm proud of my whore", I say. "I can't wait to show everyone what a depraved fucking slut you truly are."

[snelbz]

Life As We Know It {Chapter 23}

Summary: After the sudden deaths of Nesta’s sister and Cassian’s best friend, they gain guardianship of their nephew, Nyx.

Based on Life As We Know It (2010) and a prompt sent in by anonymous for our Nessian fanfic contest. This is a modern au.

Instead of doing a tag list for this story, we have decided to have a set posting schedule. Chapters will be posted weekly on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Saturdays. Occasional surprise chapters could be posted at miscellaneous times. Chapters will be posted on both my and Tara’s blogs! >> @tacmc.​

Life As We Know It Masterlist

Shelby’s Masterlist

Tara’s Masterlist

Nesta was torn.

Half of her thought that Cassian was overreacting, but the other half of her thought that his anger and frustration was perfectly justified.

What exactly were they getting into? And, was it what was best for Nyx? Yeah, the last month had been great, but if it didn’t work out, what would that mean for him? Would it be better if she and Cassian had simply remained two friends, co-parenting under one roof?

Nesta’s heart began to beat a little faster.

She felt like she was going into a panic attack.

Cassian and Nyx had been gone for an hour, and every second that passed became more and more unbearable.

She needed him to be there.

She needed to figure this out.

She just didn’t know what the answer was.

Alis had gotten into her head, there was no doubt about that. A little over an hour ago, she was living in a dream, then Alis came in, out of nowhere, and brought her back to reality.

She was sitting on the couch, almost exactly where he’d left her, when he finally returned. He was covered in sweat, his t-shirt sticking to him. Nyx was having a conversation with him, more to himself though, since it didn’t seem like Cassian was even close to paying attention to him. But his eyes went directly to Nesta as soon as he walked in.

She’d changed. She no longer wore his t-shirt, instead in a loose shirt of her own and a pair of jeans, and her hair was loose and wet around her face. As if she’d need to shower their night together, shower him off of her. Not a shred of that beautiful skin was showing, not like she’d been doing lately. Leggings and shorts and tank tops. She’d been comfortable around him.

With a scoff, Cassian set Nyx down on the floor. He headed for the stairs, but Nesta stood, nearly toppling the cup of coffee she’d been clutching over as she set it on the coffee table. “Cassian, we need to talk about this.”

He paused, waving a hand towards her. “What for? It looks like you’ve already made your decision.”

“I need you to calm down,” she said, steadily. “I need you to think logically.”

Cassian closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “I need you to tell me.”

Nesta hesitated. “Tell you what?”

“If this is something you want to pursue or if I just wasted the last couple months falling in love with you,” he finished.

His voice may have lacked emotion, but Nesta felt every word like a stab in the chest. Falling in love with you. Those were the words she was going to tell him today, under much different circumstances.

Now, she didn’t know what to think.

Now, she was overwhelmed.

Now, all of her thoughts were rushing toward the same spot in the middle of her skull at a thousand miles an hour, and when they got there, her head would explode.

“It’s not that easy,” she said, and her voice cracked.

“But it should be,” Cassian said. “If you feel the way that I do, it should be that easy.”

“We have to think of Nyx,” she breathed.

“I am thinking of Nyx,” he said, struggling to keep his voice low. At the sound of his name, the baby turned to look at him. “I want him to grow up in a happy home, seeing two people who love each other, and damn it if that isn’t how it’s been for the past few weeks.”

“It’s not that simple,” Nesta said, shaking her head. “What happens if we break up? What happens if we get in a fight or something happens to one of us? What then?”

He had strode down the stairs and was in front of her before he could stop himself. He framed her face in his hands, like he had so many times the past month, to kiss her, to make love to her, to show her how he cared for her. “Why are you worrying about the what if’s? Why are you worrying about what could go wrong, rather than how right everything has been?”

Because everything goes wrong eventually. The only reason we’re together is because we were shoved into this house after the worst thing imaginable happened. They died. We took over. What right do we have to be happy?

The words flooded her mind, but stilled on her tongue.

Nesta didn’t push him away. She wanted to reach up on her toes and kiss him, softly, but she didn’t.

Instead, she met his gaze. “Cass,” she breathed.

The pain in his eyes nearly shattered her heart into a million pieces.

Nyx had walked up to them and was hugging Nesta’s leg, as if he knew that she needed the comfort.

“Dont say my name like that,” he whispered.

Nesta slowly shook her head. “I just think this has all happened too quickly. We haven’t been thinking, we’ve just been acting-.”

“You’re pushing me away,” Cassian interrupted, swallowing harshly. “Damn it, Nesta.”

“You don’t understand,” she pleaded.

“Because you’re not making sense,” he argued. “Things have been perfect—”

“They’re dead!” She cried, pulling from his grip, scooping Nyx up. “Things have been far from perfect. We’re only like this now because Rhys and Feyre are dead.”

The words seemed to freeze something inside of Cassian and he stepped back as well. “So what? We go back to how we used to be? I’m back in the guest room and we awkwardly exchange good mornings over breakfast?”

She closed her eyes, trying to block out the sight of him, the scent of him, everything. “I don’t know, Cassian, I don’t—.” She took a shuddering breath, her arms wrapping tighter around Nyx. “I just need some time to think, to breathe…”

When she looked back up at him, his jaw was set and he was slowly nodding. “Fine. Take your time.”

And then he was moving, back up the stairs before Nesta could even ask what he was doing.

A few minutes later, he was back with a duffle bag in his hands.

“Wh—what are you doing?”

“Giving you space,” he said, refusing to meet her gaze.

Nesta opened her mouth but nothing came out. She was frozen where she stood, her feet stuck to the floor, her mouth hanging open, that panic rising from the pit of her stomach into her heart, which was beating far too quickly.

Cassian kissed Nyx on the forehead as he passed, but paid Nesta no mind as he went for the door.

“Cassian!��� She called, at last.

Cassian stopped just in front of the door, keeping his back to her, one hand on the doorknob.

“You're just going to leave?” She asked, quietly, bouncing a sleepy Nyx on her hip. “Just like that?”

Cassian didn’t turn around. “Are you going to ask me to stay?”

Yes. No. I don’t know. Nesta said nothing.

“I’ll talk to you tomorrow,” he grumbled, exhaustion lacing his tone. “Maybe I need time to think, too.”

He opened the door and shut it softly behind him.

*

He didn’t know where else to go. He didn’t have anywhere else to go.

He knew where he wanted to be, but right now…

He couldn’t look at her.

It didn’t escape him that when he’d told her he’d fallen in love with her, she didn’t say it back. He couldn’t even act like he hadn’t seen her eyes flare in panic. So he couldn’t stay there. Couldn’t go back to sleeping in that guest room, not when he’d become so used to sleeping with her in his arms every night.

So Cassian had ended up here, knocking on his brother’s door, thankful that his car had been parked in the driveway when he pulled up.

He needed a drink. He needed someone to tell him he was being an asshole. He needed someone to listen while he vented and bitched. He knew Azriel would do all that for him.

When he answered the door, Seph was in his arms, pulling on his bottom lip. She smiled when she saw Cassian, but Azriel’s surprised smile quickly faded.

“Do I want to know?” He asked, looking at the duffel bag tossed over Cassian’s shoulder.

Cassian sighed, raking a hand through his hair. “Can I sleep here tonight?”

Azriel stared at him for a second before stepping aside and letting Cassian pass.

“Are we talking about this now or later?” Azriel asked, shutting the door behind them.

“Beer?” Cassian asked, dropping his bag beside the couch.

“Fridge,” Azriel said, slowly, watching him.

Cassian made his way to the kitchen and threw open the refrigerator door, grabbing a cold bottle and chugging its contents.

Azriel followed, leaning against the countertop and Seph continued to play with his lips.

“Where’s Elain?” Cassian asked, tossing the empty bottle into the trash and getting another.

“Work,” Azriel said, sighing. “So, if this involves smack talking Nesta, you may want to get it out now.”

He shook his head. He didn’t want to do that, barely wanted to think about her. But he owed Azriel at least some explanation.

“The social worker stopped by this morning,” he sighed, leaning back against the counter and opening the beer. “And honestly, yeah, it was unexpected, but I figured it’d be fine. Last time, Nes was drunk off her ass, but we— I figured, since we were more of a family this time, things would be great.”

Azriel blinked. “They’re not taking Nyx, are they?”

Another shake of his head. “No, gods, no. They— She could tell he was in good hands, but she immediately picked up on Nesta and I. What we’ve…become.”

It seemed, just like Cassian, Azriel didn’t see it as a problem. He wasn’t following. “And?”

“And Nyx was hungry so I left the social worker and Nesta alone to get him breakfast. I came back and she’s gone and Nesta is second-guessing our relationship. She asked if I’m just fucking her out of convenience.”

The thought made him sick to his stomach, almost as badly as it hurt his heart.

“And you replied with…” Azriel began, trailing off, waiting for Cassian to finish the sentence.

“I went for a jog,” Cassian said, shrugging.

“So you ran away?” Azriel pushed.

Cassian shot him a look. “No. I went for a jog.”

Azriel sighed. “And when you came back?”

“She said she needed space,” Cassian said, emptying his bottle.

Azriel set Seph on the floor with a plastic spatula, which she instantly start banging on the cabinets. “And that’s when you ran away?”

“I didn’t run,” Cassian snapped. “I gave her what she wanted. I gave her space.”

Azriel slowly shook his head. “Did you even try to talk things out?”

“Yes,” Cassian said, the word clipped. “Told her I was falling in love with her, and guess how she replied?”

Azriel watched his brother.

“Didn’t say a fucking word,” Cassian finished.

When Azriel didn’t speak, he walked back to the trash can, dropping the bottle inside.

“Quit looking at me like I’m the bad guy here,” he said, unable to turn around and look his brother in the eye. “She was ending it. She was calling things off and I’m supposed to, what? Just keep living there like we were before? Pretend nothing has changed?” He swallowed hard, willing the damn tears clouding his vision to fade. They wouldn’t. “She didn’t even ask me to stay.”

Azriel sighed, opening a cabinet beside the fridge that Seph couldn’t reach. He produced a bottle of whiskey and set it on the counter. “I can’t drink until Elain gets home. And I absolutely think you need to talk to Nesta, but I think you’re right. You need to stay here tonight. Give her space.”

Cassian blinked, and a tear that was holding on slid free, down his cheek. He angrily wiped it away. He felt ridiculous, but it had been a long time since he had told a woman that he loved her. He’d never said it in his adulthood. A couple times in his teens, before he knew what the word really meant, but never as an adult.

He’d said it.

He’d meant it.

And she hadn’t felt the same.

Cassian nodded and poured himself a glass of whiskey.

*

Nesta stared at Cassian’s contact on her phone screen.

She wanted to press the call button, but didn’t.

She did open a blank text a few times, but couldn’t type anything.

She didn’t know what to think, didn’t know what to do.

She knew what she wanted.

She wanted Cassian.

But, she didn’t know if that was a good thing or not.

She had never been one who was dependent on a man, had spent most of her twenties single and having no problem with it. But suddenly, she couldn’t imagine her day to day life without Cassian in it. And that terrified her.

She heard murmuring on the baby monitor sitting next to her on the side table and glanced over to see Nyx sitting up in his crib.

It had been nearly three hours since Cassian left, and aside from putting Nyx down for a nap, Nesta had barely moved. She still sat in the same spot on the couch she’d been in when the social worker had shown up and when she’d ignored that Cassian had said that he loved her.

The words should have filled her with joy and she should have screamed from the rooftops that she loved him, too. Instead she locked up and thought she was going to be sick.

What was wrong with her?

Wiping away the tears she didn’t even realize had fallen, Nesta hurried up the stairs, and into Nyx’s nursery. He reached for her the moment he saw her, his own big, blue eyes beginning to fill with tears.

“What’s wrong, bubba?” She cooed, resting his head against her shoulder.

After a deep sigh, he looked up at her and reached for a tear that had fallen down her cheek. His lip began to wobble.

“I’m okay,” Nesta promised, even though her voice cracked and those tears continued. “I’m okay, buddy, I promise.”

Nyx knew, though.

He knew something wasn’t right.

He knew Cassian was gone.

He knew Nesta was heartbroken.

Little did he know that her heartbreak was self-inflicted.

Nyx laid his head back on her shoulder and clung to her. He stayed like that as she walked back downstairs and sat back in her spot on the couch.

He held onto her, looking around the room. She knew he was looking for him and was about to tell him he wasn’t here when he spoke. The word wasn’t a mash up of noises like it had always been. No, it was a true and steady word. His first word.

“Dada?”

Nesta froze. She didn’t even know what to say. Should she tell him Cassian wasn’t his father? He probably wouldn’t even understand, just like he didn’t understand where Rhys and Feyre had gone.

But…for all intents and purposes, Cassian was his daddy now. And she was his mama.

So she pressed a kiss to his dark hair and whispered. “He had to leave, baby. He had to go for a little while.”

Nesta hoped and prayed that Cassian would walk back through that door, and yet, she couldn’t muster the courage to ask him to.

That night, instead of Cassian taking up the spot next to her, it was Nyx, who held her hand until they both fell asleep.

[allthingsarmin]

Hello, can i please request an armin x reader but it’s a modern au where armin is a nerd and the reader is popular, feel free to ignore if you don’t like the idea :)

Thank you for your request, anon! I really hope you like it, and I can always rewrite it if it’s not the way you imagined. Also, sorry it is a little long - I think I got carried away with this prompt haha.

The beginning might be a little angsty, but the ending is cute ^_^

GN!Reader

Warnings: one cuss word, mentions of self-doubt, kissing

Word Count: 2,346

-------------------------

Things change - sometimes for the better - like how Armin finally cut his bob-length hair and now has a handsome undercut that suits his jawline and like how you are finally growing taller since it seemed like forever that Armin was the taller one.

Things change - sometimes for the worse - like how you and Armin used to be so close in grade school, but now in college, your relationship is made up of awkward smiles in the hallways, small waves when passing each other in the library, and unfinished conversations on SnapChat.

Things fade - relationships come to an end, people move on, and that’s just life. Look at you now, from a quiet person to a popular student known for your humorous remarks, angelic facial features, a delightful sense of style, and your beautifully color-coded notes. You capture hearts with your smile, and you never fail to make anyone laugh with your stupidly funny puns and nonsense. To put it simply, Armin is a bit different - well, you could say nerdy. Quiet, polite, and has as much passion for the world as he does intelligence. Always heavily invested in school and studying as you could almost always find his nose in between the pages of a book or study guide. Poor Armin - not known for his sweet personality or his above average intelligence. Definitely not known for his sense of style but always comes to class dressed in a rather dashing blazer and keeps a couple Kleenex tissues in his left pocket. Armin barely has any friends, - if any - but he always makes sure to hold the door open for strangers, smile at teachers when entering the classroom, and send you a “Happy Birthday!” text every year.

Some things don’t fade - like Armin’s feelings for you even after you two grew apart and he was forced to watch you from the sidelines. How could he not be so deeply in love with you? When you two were close, you coddled up with each other and read books about the ocean, learning about sharks and so naively believing in the theory of Atlantis. You stayed over at each other’s houses and studied together as well as comforted each other if one of you didn’t do as well as you expected on a test. You used to braid his long blond locks as he told you stories about his grandfather. During the summers, you would use chalk to draw a picture of you two on the blistering sidewalks outside his house, and he would give you handmade bookmarks as a present. Even though you two have grown apart, he is still in love with you, watching you laugh from far away. The way your eyes squint out of happiness and the sound of your hearty laughter makes his body heat up and his cheeks rosy. The way you sometimes send him “Good luck!” texts for when there’s a big test in a class you both are taking makes him smile with teary eyes since it seems that you have in fact not forgotten about him and his intense anxiety when it comes to test-taking. The way you ran up to Armin and gripped his arm when you unexpectedly saw him in the campus coffee shop that one time sent a euphoric tingle throughout his body that made him forget how to breathe properly. How could he not love you when you were always there for him, when you remembered every personal detail he told you during late-night childhood sleepovers, when you tried your best to make him love himself? Armin wants so badly to tell you how important you are to him, how he wants to protect you from everything bad in the world, how he wants to wrap his arms around you and listen to your heartbeat… you are just so hard to reach. He is a nerd, a loser, and you are so popular, surrounded by endless amounts of friends… he’s sure your contacts are completely full and DMs flooding with people who are interested in you and are a lot better than him. What was the point in even trying?

Luckily for Armin, you feel the same way. To be honest with yourself, your stupid jokes, loud laughter, and wide smiles were really just a cover-up for how deeply sad you are. No matter how many friends you have or instant messages you receive from strangers online, you feel incredibly alone because none of them are him. Popularity doesn't matter to you anymore - you just miss your best friend so terribly. You missed walking on the beach together, splashing each other with the salty waves, making study-flashcards together, and being able to touch his beautiful blond hair whenever you wanted. Armin’s birthday is coming up, and you want to make your move and do something big for him that would let him know how special he is to you. This time, it wouldn’t involve loads of friends or a loud party with that overly social and fake personality of yours.

You text Armin: “Hey Armin! We haven’t talked in awhile, but your birthday is this Saturday, and I would like to meet up with you. Are you free to go to the beach on Saturday? I want to give you a present, and I just want to catch up with you. I miss my friend!”

Armin read the text with relief. Even if he couldn’t have you the way he wanted, he still wanted more than anything to reconnect with his old friend. “It’s good to hear from you, y/n! I have no plans for Saturday, so of course we can meet up… around 7pm if that’s okay. I want to watch the sunset! And I miss you too…”

Saturday:

It is November, which means it’s cold. At the beach in November? Even colder, so you make sure to dress warmly.

It is 6:59pm, and you trudge through the moist sand, the harsh wind bearing itself against your face making the tip of your nose turn a bright pink as you grip your hoodie close to your body. In the distance, you see Armin sitting on the sand, shoes off and wearing a dark green sweatshirt with a black beanie. Sitting next to him was his backpack - of course he was the type to bring his school work with him while you always brought your violently vibrating phone with you everywhere.

You release a tired breath as you sit next to him in the sand, setting the bag of presents down beside you and keeping your cold hands in your hoodie pocket. A big smile is on your face as you ask him: “Aren’t you cold, Armin? Why don’t you have your shoes on?!” Armin laughs as he turns his face toward you. At this point, you can see how red his cheeks really are, and this is really the first time you’ve noticed how handsome he actually is. The softness of his blond eyelashes beautifully contrast with the sharpness of his jawline. His smile is soft, and his deep blue eyes pierce into yours. “Hahaha, I don’t know. I just haven’t been to the beach in a long time…” he trails off. “It’s ‘cuz you’re so popular now that you don’t have time to hang out with me,” he states in a playfully butt-hurt tone though you can sense that he is indeed a little upset about it. The waves hitting the shore fill the awkward silence between you two. “I know,” you softly say, “but I think about you all the time. I miss you, and I hope we can be close friends again,” you confess. Armin feels his heart flutter when you say that you miss him. He wants to tell you he loves you and wants to reassure you that he’d always be there for you, but instead he pats you on the back. “It’s okay! I was just joking,” he awkwardly laughs. “Of course we are friends, and I hope we can be even closer too.”

He glances to your side. “What’s in the bag?” he inquires. “Oh!” you exclaim, seemingly as if you forgot about it. You rush to give him the bag and shove it into his arms. “It’s just some stuff I got you for your birthday.”

He rummages through it, going through the endless amount of tissue paper on the top. He pulls out a light blue sweater first.

“It’s almost winter, so I figured I’d give you something warm. I think this color…” you pause and hesitantly reach up to adjust his beautiful blond bangs, “... would look good on you.”

You both make eye contact for a second and quickly look away from each other. “Haha, it’s beautiful, y/n. Thank you!” You are just about to say ‘no problem’ before he is quickly taking off his green sweatshirt and replacing it with the light blue one, his very toned abs peeking through the plain white t-shirt he had on underneath the sweatshirt. You feel your cheeks grow warm and instantly look away. Armin notices and chuckles to himself. He would honestly never mind if you wanted to look at them or even touch them.

“Now, onto the second one,” you say, trying to change the subject. Armin pulls out two matching, homemade bracelets that feature a seashell on both of them. He looks at them silently and intently.

“I made matching bracelets!” you say proudly. “They’re like friendship bracelets, so we both have to wear them all the time! You aren’t allowed to take it off!” you joke.

“They’re so pretty, y/n,” he whispers as he stares at the shells, a sparkle in his eyes. He immediately puts it on and gently takes your wrist to put yours on.

“There,” he says contently, carefully placing your wrist in your lap.

You two sit silently next to each other, shoulders brushing against one another and watching the waves as the sun casts a dull orange and purple glow across the sky. The sounds of waves crashing against the shore and the squawking birds in the sky cancel out the noises of Armin softly crying.

Once you notice, you quickly snap your head around. “Armin, are you okay?” you ask, extremely worried.

“Thank you for the presents, y/n,” he sniffles. “You have always done stuff like this for me,” Armin continues as he gets flashbacks of you two running across the beach and gawking at beautiful seashells, telling jokes to each other in grade school when it was supposed to be reading time, and making funny drawings of each other. “I’ve never told you thank you - for being there for me and comforting me all those times, and just letting me be myself. It’s been such a long time since we’ve done anything together. I miss making you laugh, and I miss going to the library with you and asking you about your day.”

At this point, you feel like crying too because you feel the exact same. You spent so much of your life wanting to fit in, and you finally became popular but at what cost? You nearly forgot about the most important person to you, the one person that actually cares about you.

“I love you,” Armin suddenly blurts out, a tear running down his face. “I want to be yours, and I want you to be mine,” he says so quietly that it’s borderline pathetic. You swear your heart stopped when he said that. You feel a burning sensation all along your body as you forget about the cold air hitting your face, and you feel your breathing stop. The uncertainty you felt that kept you awake every night about whether Armin thought of you the same, all the self-doubt, all the guilt about leaving your friend behind, had been erased in an instant.

The silence between you two is unbearably awkward, and with confidence you seemingly pull out of nowhere, you throw yourself onto Armin’s lips, your arms enclosing his broad shoulders, and both of you falling sideways into the wet sand. Armin, at first shocked, passionately kisses back and links onto your soft lips. The tips of your noses are cold, but you both eventually succumb to each other's warmth. You both pull away to catch some breath. Armin gently wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you closer to him as you bury your head in the crook of his neck. Even after all this time, he still smells the same - vanilla and cedarwood. “I love you too,” you softly say. Noticing that you both are practically wallowing in the sand by now, you apologize. “Also, sorry I ruined your new sweatshirt. There’s sand all over it,” you laugh.

“Oh, it’s okay,” he reassures, shyly placing a kiss on your forehead. “Want to watch the sunset with me?” You nod your head enthusiastically, a smile you couldn’t help leave your lips.

“Oh, fuck,” you quitely exclaim.

“What’s wrong?” Armin asks in a concerned tone.

“I forgot I have an essay due at 11:59 tonight.”

Armin busts out laughing - a sound you wouldn’t mind hearing for the rest of your life even though he’s laughing at your poor planning.

“When the sun finally sets, we can go back to my dorm, and I can help you with it if that’s alright with you,” he politely offers.

“Sure!” you happily reply.

You both sit up and face the horizon. The sun was almost gone, and the sky was a heavenly pink color while the sea began to look indigo. Your hands were linked with Armin’s, and for the first time in a long time, you felt warm despite the air getting cooler.

Getting ready to go to Armin’s dorm, he grabs his backpack and his dark green sweatshirt. You get up and check your phone, not at all caring that you have nearly fifty missed text messages and missed calls asking why you didn’t come to the weekly campus party.

You finally have all that you need.

-----------------------

I really hoped you liked it! Requests are open ~ I have another request that will be posted soon.

[woniepop]

encore

➜ sunghoon had never fallen in love with anything the way he did with skating. the wind in his face, the crunch of the ice beneath his feet, it was wonderful. and yet, something about it made your blood boil. you once loved ice skating too, for the same reasons as he, but maybe all you needed was a simple goodbye to understand park sunghoon.

wc: 4.6k

genre: ice skating au, best friends to lovers (ish), angst, fluff, romance, slice of life

content warnings: illness, mentions of medication, mentions of blood, death, mentions of anxiety, mentions of fainting, hospitals, angst, death of a loved one

heavily based off Your Lie in April

tagging: @svnghoonie @unghoon @swanlakesujin​ @heeblr @sweetseung @ferxanda @katberri @usdolans @kisshoons @scintillasofbeomgyu @leemika @qngelhoonie​ 

a/n: hi everyone! this is my first time i’m writing something like this, so i hop eyou guys enjoy it because i’d be super down to write more in the future. 

Friday, October 16, 2020

The busy sounds of couples, families, and friends fill the air as the cold wind hits your face. Holding hands with your mom, you glide through the ice, laughter filling the entire rink. The bleachers, the other skaters, the floor, it all disappears and the only thing that’s left is you and your mom. Your seven year old self had never felt so alive. 

And yet, here you were, seventeen, staring off into the ice rink as other kids and their mothers ice skated. Ever since you fell in love with the sport it had been the bane of your existence. Mom died, so you stopped. You swore to never go back again, it gave you anxiety. You tried, you really did, but something about being on the ice reminded you so much of the past you wanted to leave behind. It went downhill from then on. 

“Hey, what are you thinking about?” a familiar voice calls out to you. Sunghoon, who had been practicing for his upcoming competition, leans against the side of the rink, talking to you who was sitting on the bleachers. 

“Just my mom again,” you reply. 

“It’s been a while since she passed away, huh. Should we go get some ice cream to cheer you up then?” He says as he skates towards the exit, walking to you. You stand up, bag in hand, and wait for him to change out of his skates. Sunghoon, who had been your best friend since your five year old skating class, had been with you through everything. He always seemed to know just what to say to cheer you up. 

“Hey, y/n. Do you think you’d ever try to skate again?” Sunghoon asks, fully knowing the answer but hoping maybe this time it'll be different. 

“Haha, you really want me to get back into skating that badly?” 

“Well, it’s been a while since you’ve done it. You don’t have to compete with me again, you know. But why don’t you just try it again for fun?” 

You stop in your tracks and think about it. It wouldn’t hurt to try for fun. It was your life at one point. “Fine, tomorrow afternoon. But that’s it.” you say, watching his face light up. 

Saturday, October 17, 2020

“Don’t let go, Sunghoon. I SAID DON’T LET GO.” You shout, as he laughs. 

“Y/n, just relax. You know this. I’m letting go now.” 

“SUNGHOON!” you shout. Your legs bent and you stand in place, too scared to move. You watch as he takes your hand and guides you around the rink. The nostalgia comes rushing back. The wind in your face, the feeling of your feet gliding across the ice like nothing, it had been so long. Before you realize it, you had let go of Sunghoon and gone way ahead of him. Looking back, you find him smiling at you. You remember this feeling, and you loved it. 

You’d definitely got your love of skating from your mom. Being the daughter of a professional skater, it had been your dream to be like her. She was and always will be your role model. When you had quit skating you wondered if she’d be disappointed in you for quitting, but thoughts of her always flooded your mind and you could never focus on the task at hand. You knew your mom would never be disappointed in you, but you were disappointed in you. 

It had been half an hour of skating and an all too familiar voice calls out to you.

“Y/n!”

“Mom?” you say in response. You look back, no one. Not soon after, your breathing gets heavy, the world starts spinning and the nostalgia of the rink gets washed over by spots of black, your head was pounding. You keep looking. Where was she? Why was this happening? You wanted to hug her. Was she proud of you? Upset that you didn’t skate anymore? Why did she leave you? Before you know it, you could feel Sunghoon holding you on the floor before going unconscious.

Sunday, October 18, 2020

“Y/n, I’m so sorry.” Sunghoon says, clutching your hand while kneeling next to your bed. 

“Sunghoon, I’m fine. It’s not your fault.” 

“BUT IT IS! I asked you to skate with me and now you’re hurt.” 

“I’m not hurt. It’s okay.” you say as you rub the back of his hand with your thumb. You look at the clock. 7pm. It was the next day. “Don’t you have practice? Let’s go.” 

“What do you mean let’s go?!? You just woke up??” Sunghoon utters in a panic.

“Yeah, which means I’m energized. I need to make sure you don’t stay there for too long and hurt yourself too.” you say, standing up to shoo Sunghoon out so you can change. “Wait on the couch,” 

A few moments later you both were out the door and on the bus to the ice rink. 

“I’m not going to stay for long then. I don’t want you to be out for too long.” He decides. 

“That’s fine.” 

The noise Sunghoon’s skates made as they hit the ice and the chilly air gave you comfort as you watched him run through his routine. Running his fingers through his hair, your eyes follow him wherever he went. He knew you were watching, which was why he was putting on his best performance. The both of you had never felt butterflies for each other like the way you did now. Before you knew it, the two of you were falling hard. 

“Y/n, let’s go now.” Sunghoon says as his chest rises up and down, panting from his last run. 

“Okay, you did good today.” You compliment him as you walk to the bus. His hand accidentally bumps into yours. You desperately wished that he had gone to hold yours, but he was just your best friend. Nothing more. The ride was filled with a comfortable silence. You stared out the window while Sunghoon stared at you. Feeling his gaze on you, you turn to look at him only for him to turn away and pretend like he was looking the other way. Having spent almost everyday for the past ten years with Sunghoon, you guys never needed to talk constantly, having each other there was just enough to have a great day. 

You get off together, but Sunghoon was acting suspiciously jittery. He walks you home, but you see him turn the opposite direction of your house once you’re inside. Weird. 

Alone, Sunghoon gets back on the bus. His home was close enough to walk from your house, though. “What was he doing?”, you thought.

Arriving at his destination, Sunghoon sighs as he puts a hand up to his backpack strap. 

“Name?” the receptionist asks. 

“Park Sunghoon.” 

“Sunghoon! I’m sorry to see you back. You’ve grown so well. The doctor is ready for you in room 306. Good luck!” 

In and out of hospitals ever since the seventh grade, twelve year old Sunghoon stands in the dark hospital hallway, watching his parents cry in the moonlit lobby. He didn’t have much time left, he thought. 

Trudging through the all too familiar hallways, Sunghoon makes a left turn and opens the fourth door to the right. He knew this place like the back of his hand. 

“Hey Sunghoon! Welcome back! Just take a seat over there and I’ll start preparing to run some tests and then we’ll talk about starting your physical therapy.” The doctor says in a way too cheerful voice. 

“That sound’s good. Thank you.” Sunghoon replies. Hearing the sound of the door clicking shut, Sunghoon sat deep in thought. He wanted to skate with you again, but he was worried about your health. Just one more time. That was what he wanted. The glimmer in your eyes, you huge yet adorable smile. He wanted to see it again. 

Next Saturday, October 24, 2020

The day started out hectic but you finally found your seat in the stands. You waited for them to announce Sunghoon. Alas, he came gliding out and the crowd was already cheering. Before he starts his eyes search for you, smile widening when his eyes finally meet with yours. Although he had other passions, like skating, his favorite one would always be you. The music starts and the audience quiets down. You had probably seen this routine over 100 times, but something about the setting, the mood, made it seem like a whole new dance. Every move he made drew you further in. He pushed the audience to the edge of their seats leaving them in awe. It was all for you. Everything about him at that moment was brilliant. Once he ends, the audience roars and Sunghoon, not surprisingly, ends up winning. Of course he won. He was your Sunghoon. 

You make a beeline towards the performers’ hall and jump onto Sunghoon’s back, accidentally hitting his face with the flowers you had purchased a few moments before. 

“Y/n, I told you to stop buying me these. They’re a waste of money.” Sunghoon giggles, happy to see you. You’d had always brushed them off as a pretty reward for a pretty performer, but there had always been a separate meaning behind the red tulips you give him. They would always end up in your home, in the glass vase next to the couch. A gift from your father to your mother, every Friday. Red tulips, the symbol of true love. 

“Alright, I need to go change, wait here.” he says, leaving you behind. 

An hour goes by and you were starting to get a bit worried. You knock on his changing room door. Nothing. Did he leave without you? You knock on the door again, and nothing. Opening the door, your eyes widen and you let out a gasp. Sunghoon had fainted due to exhaustion and the blood from his head injury had stained the floor. 

You call the ambulance and thankfully they arrive quickly. Refusing to leave Sunghoon’s side, you watch as the nurses wrap bandages around his head. This had been the first time you’d seen Sunghoon like this. Was it happening often? Did he not get enough sleep last night? 

“Sunghoon, I’m glad to see you’re awake. You passed out from exhaustion again and we’ve handled your head injury. You’re free to go anytime.” The doctor says. 

“Again?”  you ask. 

“Yeah, but only a long time ago. You don’t need to worry about it.” Sunghoon says. “My parents have been overreacting and making me get routine tests, though.” 

As a kid, you hated going to the hospital, and Sunghoon knew that. It was bland, it was boring, but most of all it’s the place you lost your mother. You hated the hospital. You’d come almost every month, week even, watching them run tests on your mom, prescribe her what seemed to be like hundreds of different medications, it was terrible. Losing your parent to cancer was not fun. No more skating, no more family days, no more cheering at competitions. Your family dinners turning to just you and your dad, and then just you. Referring to your parents as my “parent,”. Learning how to live life without the person you cherished most. It seemed like your life revolved around that retched place you called the hospital. 

The rain poured and thunder boomed through the quiet hospital. He had sent you home before it rained, not wanting you to get wet and sick from the cold. Sunghoon sat still and thought to himself in his bed. “I see, so I’ve passed out again,” he thinks.

Monday, October 26, 2020

The chair screeches across the floor as Sunghoon drags it to your desk. 

“Y/nnnnnnn” he whines, seeing you eat your gummy worms. 

“No.” 

“But I’m hungryyyy” he cries. You roll your eyes, placing one in his hand. You watch as he holds one side close to his mouth as if he was waiting for something. 

“Sunghoon, what are you doing?” you ask. 

“Bite the other side” he says, causing your face to go red. 

“No”

“yes”

“no” 

“why not?” he says with his best attempt at puppy eyes and a pout. 

“why?” you ask, hoping he hasn’t noticed your tomato red face yet

“cause I want to. we can lady and tramp it.” he says. “you know you want to.” 

“I’m not going to lady and tramp a gummy worm with you. eat it or i’m taking it back.” you argue.

“Fine, but I have a proposal.” he announces. “I want to enter the next competition with you. Just one. Give me one more duet before you quit for good.” 

“no,” you reply. “I’m never skating again.” 

“Why not? You love it” 

“Why do you want me to skate so badly?” you ask. He didn’t know what to say. He couldn’t tell you the real reason. He couldn’t tell you he was dying, that was a huge no. 

“I miss being able to skate with my best friend. I feel so lonely.” he says, puppy eyes resurfacing. 

“I’ll think about it then.” 

“Good. Meet me at the ice rink on Saturday at 10am” he exclaims before getting up to go back to his desk. 

“I haven’t even agreed.” 

“Oops I can’t hear you!” he says as you roll your eyes. 

Saturday, October 31, 2020

Little you steps off the ice as tears threatened to pour out of your eyes. Running out of the rink into the changing room, you latch on to your mother. 

“Mommy, I’m not gonna win,” you say. Her hand comes up to run her fingers through your hair. She coos at you until your breathing has relaxed. 

“Why don’t you think you’d win, honey? I loved watching you out there. You were so beautiful.” she says. 

“I fell on the ice! Winners don’t do that. I wanted to win just like you.” you manage to sniffle out. You feel your mother give you a kiss on the forehead before kneeling and holding both of your hands. 

“Ah, you see, my love, they do! Mommy fell all the time! She still falls! I promise you no winner has never fallen. Mommy only wins because she knows what it’s like to fall! Even if you don’t win, mommy is very proud of you, okay?” she says. 

You bolt up from your sleep. It was just a dream. Scrunching your face, holding back the tears that threatened to spill out, you force yourself to get ready for the day, not giving any time to be sad and reminisce. 

You enter the complex, Sunghoon standing at the entrance of the rink, impatiently waiting for you. He was so excited. This was going to work out for him. You both walk to the bleachers to satrt lacing your skates, Sunghoon practically bouncing off the walls. 

“Aw man, I forgot my hair tie” you complain. Sunghoon pauses lacing his boots and holds his arm out to you. 

“Here” Sunghoon says as you look at the extra hair tie on his wrist. 

“Why do you have these.” you ask. 

“You always forget.” he says, unsurprised.

“Awwww you were thinking of me?” you teased. 

“Of course, idiot. Did you forget? I’m never not thinking of you” Sunghoon argued, wallking away, leaving you dumbfounded and blushing like a tomato. 

Once again you step into the rink. You were stronger this time. Taking a deep breath you start to glide across the ice once again. It was very unsettling, though. Being on the ice, having fainted the last time you were here. Both you and Sunghoon were on edge, but you were determined to help him win this competition. 

The day was filled with talking with your instructor, cleaning up your spins and jumps, and getting back to where you were before. You were getting it and you showed no signs of panic. Sunghoon was so proud of you. YOU were proud of you.

Sunghoon was happy, and he was hopeful. On his walk home all his thoughts were filled with you. Loving you ever since the seventh grade, when he found out he had an illness. He had decided never to tell you, fearing his time would come and leave you alone, but it was too late now. He didn’t want to push you away, you were his ride or die. His heart ached, he didn’t want to say goodbye. He didn’t want you to have to live alone. 

Opening the door to his home, he walks through the hallway, leaning against the wall limping to his room. Every big event Sunghoon would write you a letter, and so tonight he poured his heart out onto this piece of paper, tears staining his face. 

Sunday, November 1, 2020

On Sunday, you show up to his house unexpectedly but not surprisingly. “Sunghoon, get dressed. We’re going to the market.” you say. Without question, he does as you ask and you both head to the market in no time.

Walking down the ice cream aisle, you grab all the flavors you enjoy, filling your whole basket with different ice creams, toppings, fruit, drinks, and even a cake. “You’re quite hungry, aren’t you?” Sunghoon teases, earning him a slap to the arm.

As soon as you get home, you send Sunghoon alone to his bedroom, telling him you need time to prepare everything. You had pulled all the stops, whipping out the cheap snoopy shaved ice maker, birthday party hats, streamers, balloons, and banners. It was no one’s birthday in particular, but the fake birthday party put you in a festive and refreshing mood. You had set up a giant ice cream sundae bar, and had even made lemonade.

Calling Sunghoon to come out of the bedroom, he was not surprised but very impressed. Wanting to make it even more fun, he suggests to make sundaes for one another, which you happily agree to. The day was so fun, and it was hardly possible, but Sunghoon had fallen in love with you even more. 

Sunghoon was so happy that you planned something like this. He was never one to do anything cute for you unless you begged, so this time he wanted to show you how grateful he was to you by giving you one FREE boop on the nose. Scooping some ice cream with his fingertip, he lightly taps your nose, leaving the melted strawberry ice cream to drip off your nose. You turn to look at him in disgust, eventually dipping your finger in the ice cream and starting a war. 

Monday, November 2, 2020

From: Sunghoon (sent at 7:30am) 

[ GOOD MORNIN PARTY PEOPLE!!! ] 

From: you

[ where are you ]

From: Sunghoon

[ Oh yeah I forgot to tell you I’m not coming today. ]

From: you

[ what, why? I don’t wanna eat lunch alone like a loser. ]

From: Sunghoon

[ oh yeah. i’m back at the hospital LMAOOOO ]

From: you

[ WHY ]

From: Sunghoon

[ idk i forgot. i just woke up here and they were like “hihi” and i said “hihi” back ]

From: you

[ you are unbelievable. i’m coming after school. ]

From: Sunghoon

[ NO DON’T ] 

From: you

[ why ]

From: Sunghoon 

[ i don’t wanna get yelled at again. only come if you bring me more gummy worms ]

From: you

[ fine. since you’re sick ] 

You acted like you didn’t care, but you were so worried. What could’ve happened? Why couldn’t he remember? Even when bed ridden, he still managed to get you to fall head over heels. 

That afternoon, you arrive at the hospital, finding Sunghoon playing video games while lying in bed. You chuckled. Even with head bandages and an IV drip, he still managed to be his teenage boyish self. 

“Y/n! Today was so boring. Can we take a walk in the garden, I’m sick of being here.” he asks, to which you reluctantly agreed. 

During your stroll you talked about anything and everything, a common activity you both did. 

“How was school today? Did you miss me?” Sunghoon asks cheekily. 

“I did actually. I didn’t realize how much time I spend with you until today.” you respond. “But, it was okay. I got your gummy worms and some other snacks too. I know you hate hospital food.” 

“Well I missed you too, there was no one but the staff to bother.” He chuckles. “You know, I’m not always going to be around to help you.” 

“I know, but we have time.” 

Before you knew it, the sun was setting and Sunghoon sent you home so you didn’t have to walk alone in the dark. On his walk back to his room, Sunghoon worried. The thing was, you didn’t have time. The fact that you missed him in just a few hours? How would you feel about forever? He never wanted you to have bad days, let alone be the one to cause them. 

Walking through the hallways he trips and falls. Landing on his knees. He tried to get up, but he couldn’t. Why wouldn’t his legs move? He punched his leg. Nothing. Again. It was no use. He had lost feeling in his legs. Tears start pouring out of his eyes. Move, it’s just your leg. Get up. Move. Water droplets fall from his face as he bangs his fist on the floor. Why can’t he move. Eventually he gives up, dragging himself back to his room with his arms. They hurt. His heart hurt. Everything hurt. Was this it?

Tuesday, November 3, 2020

After last night’s events, Sunghoon felt out of it. He wouldn’t be able to go back to school for a while, the nurses claiming that if it happens again the situation can be way worse. He couldn’t skate anymore. He couldn’t see YOU skate anymore. This was it. His illness was getting to him. 

With a knock on the door, Sunghoon falls right out of his daze and watches as you come in with another bag of goodies. 

“I brought you some stuff from the convenience store.” You say, taking out a bottle of green tea and handing it to him. He reaches out to grab it but as soon as you let go the bottle slips out of his hands. 

Ah, so it’s spreading to my arms too, he thinks as he realizes he was too weak to grip the bottle. The doctors told his parents last night that surgery was an option, but it would only give him a little more time, but he wanted to take it. He wanted to be able to skate a little longer. He wanted to make it to the competition. 

“I’m in the mood to watch all the Studio Ghibli movies in one sitting.” Sunghoon says as he leans his head back. 

“Scoot over,” you reply, getting up to sit in his bed with him. “Good thing I brought my laptop.” 

“Are you sure? That’s gonna be like all night.” He asks. 

“Of course, I’m always in the mood for you,” you say as Sunghoon wraps an arm around you, prepared for the whole night of cuddling and movie watching. 

Half way through the marathon you feel Sunghoon nuzzle his face into your neck. His soft snoring tickled you. You bring your hand up to stroke his hair. Park Sunghoon, I am so in love with you, you think.  Your smile. Your eyes. Your lips. Your hair. Your voice. You teasing. The way you say my name. The way you stare at me. The way you talk. The way you smile at me. The way my day isn’t complete without you. I love you. 

Wednesday, November 4, 2020

The next day was supposed to be better. Sunghoon was going to see you and you were gonna get him more gummy worms. Sitting up with him on his bed, you were cuddling, and he seemed to be getting paler and paler by the minute. He seemed really tired, like he was sick to his stomach. 

You got up to go get him a drink from the vending machine, and as you came back nurses and doctors were rushing in and out of your best friend’s room. Your heart feels like it’s going to beat out of it’s chest and you run to his room. Sunghoon was clutching onto the sides of the bed, doctors scrambling to get the defibrillator going. His heart had stopped.

You’d later learn that he had gone into cardiac arrest, and you watched as the nurses wheeled his bed to the ICU. But the surgery didn’t work, and he didn’t survive. You felt numb. Stretching out a trembling arm, you took hold of Sunghoon’s hand. You shut your eyes and squeezed his palm. It was cold. Your  hand trembled harder with each passing second, as if the movement would cause Sunghoon to wake up. Your face buried into the crook of his neck. You nudged the bridge of your nose against the cool skin. Your lips brushed against his collarbone in desperate search of that familiar warmth. Both hands had clasped around Sunghoon’s, quavering without pause. Devastation weighed down on you. It was a surreal feeling, one that you could never in one million years describe. It squeezed you, threatening to crush you from the inside out. The pain seared itself into your soul, hindering him, rendering him speechless to a point where he no longer knew what words were. A sob wretched its way out from your throat. You tried desperately to hold it in. Tried so hard to keep yourself together, but you knew you were too weak to pull such a bluff. Once the second sob had left you, you felt yourself spiraling. There was no hiding it.

The doctor comes to hand you a letter. Weakly reaching out, you read it right away. You were desperate. You needed to hear something from Sunghoon, anything. 

Dear Y/n,

HI BESTIE, I know I write you one of these every big event, but I’m afraid this might be my last. I’m sorry if you’re getting the before the competition. I desperately wanted to skate with you, but I guess if you’re reading this then my time has come. I hope you’re doing okay. I don’t want you to miss me too much. Please keep skating. I love watching you skate, more than anything. You look so happy, so carefree. I want you to live like that always. It’s a lot to ask, I know, but I don’t want you to associate something you love so much with sadness. I’m with your mom now, and we’re rooting for you. Always. 

I know it was pretty obvious, but I love you. Actually, that’s an understatement. I’m so in love with you that my heart hurts when I’m not with you. I’m in love with you. And I love that I’m in love with you. I love the feelings. The happiness when I think of you, the butterflies when you text me, the excitement I get when I know I’ll get to see you. It’s amazing. And you’re amazing, and I love you. And I’m sorry I had to keep so many secrets. I’m sorry I couldn’t make it to the competition. I’m sorry for not telling you about my illness. I didn’t want you to carry this burden with me. You’re the light of my life, Y/n. I love you. 

Love, 

your bestie, sunghoon. 

[will-on-the-internet]

All The Time | Aaron Hotchner

SUMMARY: Sometimes Aaron had weekends when he had no work to complete, and for him, they were the best types of weekends, because he got to pleasure you like you deserved.

WARNINGS: SMUT, MINORS DNI, Soft Dom!Hotch, choking, fingering, rough sex, unprotected sex (be safe!), penatrative sex, vagina, no pronouns used for reader.

A/N: My first Criminal Minds request, and the first piece I’ve ever written for Hotch. Remember, my requests are open for Spencer Reid, Aaron Hotcher, Emily Prentiss and JJ! Just send in an ask or message me!

REQUEST: Would love a hotch/reader smut/romantic relationship...please NO angst, include rough sex and choking with soft dom Hotch!

INTERACT FOR MORE AARON HOTCHNER FICS!

Weekends without reports to be submitted or a new criminal to catch were rare for Aaron Hotchner. So rare in fact, that the whole first half of Saturday had him glancing at his mobile, waiting for it to ring and pull him back into the chaotic world of murders, victims, and insane cases.

But by the time Saturday night rolled around and dinner had been had, he knew he was in the clear, knew he had the weekend to spend with you. And for a man who often felt like he didn’t have enough time for his loved ones, he wasn’t going to waste this perfect opportunity to be with you.

You were laying against him on the couch, the top of your head tucked just underneath his chin, a small smile on your face as you mindlessly watched the TV in front of you, Aaron’s large hands holding your waist and lips pressing kisses to your hair line. For the two of you, it was a perfect Saturday night, spent in each other’s company after drinking a couple glasses of wine and sharing some Indian take out for dinner. For once, Aaron was home on a weekend, and you were wrapped in his loving embrace as his long fingers dipped under the material of your shirt and started rubbing gentle patterns against the skin of you back and waist.

You knew instantly what he was aiming at, and when you caught a glimpse of his growing smirk as you let out a blissful sigh, he knew that you had caught on to his plan. Adjusting yourself, you leaned your arms on his chest and looked right at him, smile widening as his grip on your waist tightened.

“I gotta say, having you home is pretty nice.” Your words were quiet but caught his attention over the sound of the TV.

“Oh yeah? And why’s that, darling?” His lips were slowly moving closer to yours, so tantalizingly close that you nearly couldn’t resist kissing him. But you had other plans.

“Well, it’s not often we get to be like this, relaxing and having dinner and not acting as if a lot of the world is out to get us. It’s nice to just have some silence, it’s nice not to have your phone ringing or my pager going off.” He hums in response, hot breath against the skin of your cheek, and as you adjust yourself once more to straddle his waist, weighing down against his already hardening cock, you know you’ve got him, hook line and sinker.

But what you don’t know, is that he had this all planned out ever since you laid against him on the couch.

“Mhm, that is true.” His hands are moving lower slowly, cupping your ass, and eliciting a sharp whine from you when he gives it a squeeze, lips pulling up into a shit eating grin. “But do you know what I think is the best thing about being home?” His lips were on your skin then, tongue against your neck and teeth grazing your pulse point as your eyes widened in surprise at how the table suddenly turned on you.

“What-what’s the best thing about being home, sweetheart?” You could barely form a sentence as his fingers squeezed the globes of your ass and his mouth nipped at your jaw, his eyes bright with want and need.

“Knowing I have all the time in the world to fuck you, to take you apart on my fingers and cock and to turn you into such a pretty little thing on this couch.” Aaron had you moaning then, the sound slipping out from your gritted teeth as he started to peel your shirt off you.

You tried to catch his lips, tried to kiss him like you so desperately wanted to, but Aaron wasn’t having it, instead sending you a frown and hands coming up to cup your face.

“Uh, uh, baby, I’m not going to kiss you until I think you deserve it. Now be good.” His words were firm but soft, and you knew that he was going to make you feel so insanely good, even if you had to wait a while.

He shifted the both of you then, moving on the couch so your body was laid delicately under his and his frame hovered over you, caging you in and making you see only him, his chapped lips, and broad shoulders.

Aaron started his ministrations then, lips attaching themselves to your collarbone and neck, sucking deep purple marks into your skin with fingers toying with the waist band of your track pants. You knew you needed to be good, needed to do what Aaron wanted if you were going to get the relief you so badly wanted, but as his mouth pressed against the skin of your breast that was spilling out of your bra, you knew you were closer than either of you imagined, hips bucking into his. He let out a warm laugh as he looked down at you, took in your embarrassed expression that only made his smirk widen.

“You know, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so needy, sweet girl. You must really want me.” You nodded back at him, letting out another moan when he pulled your pants off you, fingers quickly pressing into your clit through the material of your underwear. “Well then, I did want to take my time with you right now, but I can always do that later.”

“Please, Aaron, fuck, I want you.” Your lover didn’t hesitate to slip a finger in your then, pushing your underwear to the side and curling his finger so you felt the full stretch. His other hand yanked at the cups of your bra, not even bothering to fully take the flimsy material off you, watching as your breasts spilled out, waiting for his hot mouth to envelop them.

Suddenly you were seeing stars, his lips tugging at your nipples and hand in your pussy that was pushing you closer and closer to the edge. He could feel you, filled with your escaping juices and nearing putty in your hands, and Aaron could only smile down at you, pulling away for a moment to tuck some hair behind your ears.

“God, you look so beautiful, baby. Looking so perfect. How the hell did I end up deserving you?” He didn’t wait for an answer because he finally kissed you.

It was like you had reached heaven, his lips on yours and hands all over your body. He kissed like it was going to be his last one, with so much need and want and love all rolled into one it nearly sent you into a frenzy, grappling to hold onto whatever part of him you could reach. His hand was moving faster in you then, three fingers thrusting in and out of you as you whined and whimpered against his open mouth.

He surrounded you, his body the only thing you could see, his dark pupils blown and hair a mess as you ran your hand through it, tugging it slightly when he bit into your lip. Aaron knew exactly what to do to turn you into a mess in his arms, your chest raising erratically as his free hand tugged and groped at your breasts, the touch of his skin feeling like flames against your skin.

“C’mon baby, I can feel you, you’re so close to cumming on my fingers. Be a good girl darling and cum for me.” You were gone then, sinking into his embrace as you flooded his fingers, mouth opening for a silent moan and eyes near rolling to the back of your head as Aaron littered kisses all over your face and neck, soothing you as you came down from your high. “There we go, good girl. You’re so good for me, darling.”

He pulled his fingers from his mouth, watching as your cum slowly dripped off them, before taking his fingers into his mouth, licking them clean as you melted once before his eyes, a desperate whimper sounding through the room. He helped you out of your soaked underwear and bra that still was some how hanging onto your body, and then shucked his own clothes off, becoming a pristine piece of artwork, all sculptured muscle with rosy skin and sharp angles that nearly made you want to weep.

He hoisted you up as he sat back on his legs, moving you so that your legs hung loosely around his hips and your body was arched up, pillow behind your head.

“Now, as much as I want to go slow with you, I think you need me to much. So, what do you, baby?” His lips were tugging at the lobe of your ear, pressing himself against as you felt his thick cock against your stomach, warm and throbbing and already leaking with precum.

“Make me yours, Aaron. Do what you want to me.” As soon as he grinned at you, a grin that was wolfish and made your toes curl, you knew you had made the right choice. And Aaron didn’t hesitate, making quick work of stroking himself and lining himself up before pushing right in, not giving you any time to adjust.

Aaron pounded into you, rough and hard like he knew you wanted it, making you moan like he knew he could. Watching the muscles of his hips move and his cock slide into you, you nearly couldn’t keep focus on everything around you, losing your grip of reality as his mouth came down once again to suck on your breasts, not once losing his pace.

He was covered in sweat, and the noises that filled the room were feral, a growl leaving his mouth when you scratched his back.

That was when he changed, his eyes turning completely dark and his hips knocking into yours with such ferocity that you were worried he was going to knock you off the couch. And then his hand was around your neck, stroking it as you whimpered at his touch, not knowing how to cope with all the pleasure that was flooding your veins.

“Fuck you would look so pretty with my hand around your neck, so damn hot baby.” He wasn’t applying any pressure, not wanting to pass any boundaries, and giving you the moment to decide what you wanted, but as soon as you placed a hand on his and nodded, he was gone.

“Do, Aaron, I’m yours.” He sucked in a moan at your words, and then slowly applied a light pressure, wary of how much you could handle. He was still thrusting into you and you could tell he was close, his eyes closing in pleasure for a moment before they snapped back upon to watch you come undone under his hand and filled with his cock. “Please, Aaron, more.” You gripped his shoulder, trying to edge him on further as his thrusts became sloppy. “I need more, Aaron.”

“You need more, sweet thing? Then I’m going to give it to you.” He nearly split you in half with how hard he thrusted in then, earing a shocked but pleasure filled shriek as his hand still gripped your throat. He lifted you so that you were nearly folded in half, and he gazed down at you hungrily, watching as your breasts shook and how your face contorted in pleasure and eyes rolled to the back of your head.

You screamed when you came, soaking him and clenching around him in a way that had him seeing red and cumming with you, filling you up with his cum as you went limp, spent and resting right on the line of pleasure and over stimulation. His hand dropped from your throat, leaving a red hand mark on your skin. He collapsed next to you, shifting his weight so that you laid on top of him again, an arm flung around your waist as you pressed your face to his neck, slowly coming down from your high that left you shaky and breathing heavily. The both of you were slick with sweat, covered in each other’s cum and wrapped up in an embrace of love and comfort.

“Fuck, Aaron. I didn’t expect that to happen.” You spoke softly against his skin, your hand lazily drawing patterns on his chest, cradled close to your lover, who made no attempt in letting you go.

“Did, I hurt you at all? I know the choking thing was new for us.” You shook your head, running a hand through his hair that was longer than usual, a lack of time causing him to miss his usual hair appointments with the barber.

“No, baby. You didn’t hurt me at all. I actually think it was quite hot.” He smirked at your response, leaning down to press a soft kiss to your lips and entangle your fingers with his.

“Oh yeah?”

“Mhm, I thought it was very hot, Aaron. Definitely something that suits you.” He chuckled at your words, then smiled down at you as you wrapped your arms around his neck to pull his mouth closer once again.

“Well then, I’ll keep that in mind. Now how about we take this upstairs? I think our large bed is going to be more comfortable than our couch, especially if tonight’s going to continue.” He didn’t even reply, just stood up and hoisted you into his arms, lips once again attached to yours before he walked towards the stars.

Sometimes Aaron longed for a case to come his way, to catch another bad guy and to save another helpless victim. Sometimes he longed for his desk at the BAU, to be surrounded by his team and friends, discussing the latest crime, and profiling the newest unsub. And sometimes, he only longed for you, your body, and your time, wanting to give you everything he had, wanting to be with you for as long as he could, until the world called him back to the chaos and danger.

And you, you were happy to wait for him, something he was forever grateful for.

INTERACT FOR MORE AARON HOTCHNER FICS!

[ererokii]

Candy Love || Katsuki Bakugo

Katsuki Bakugo x Fem!Reader

Warnings: cursing because it’s bakugo obviously

Word Count: 4320

Synopsis: Middle school is an important time in someone’s life. An upcoming Valentines Day dance has Katsuki thinking about ways he can ask you out without ruining his pride.

A/N: For some more context, UA will be the middle school they attend instead of Aledra Junior High, thank you Gabbi for the idea🥺 

Tags: @lady-bakuhoe​

The month of February was displayed as the ‘Season of Love’ by the media. Each store was succumbing to this standard. The plain look opting to a red and white look, the contents inside filling with stuffed bears and flowers. 

The halls of UA middle school buzzed with excitement. For the first time in 10 years, the school was bringing back their ‘Dance of Love’ to the community. Due to this happening, many students felt a jolt of excitement. 

The dance was in 2 days. And a certain someone still didn’t have a date.

Bakugo Katsuki was currently sitting at his desk in his math class, arms behind his head as he leaned back in his chair. There were a couple of minutes before the bell rang. 

“So Bakubro!” Kirishima said and slammed his hands on Bakugo’s desk. “Are you going to go to the dance?!”

Bakugo scoffed and rolled his eyes. “A dance? Please like I would go.”

“Oh come on man that’s so not manly! You know who you should ask?!”

“Please enlighten me.”

“Y/LN!”

At the sound of your name, Bakugo’s cheeks heated up slightly as he looked away. “Why would I ask her to the dance?”

“Because you like her!”

A gasp cut the silence from the side of him as Kaminari leaned over, placing his hands on the side of his mouth to keep his voice down. “No way dude seriously?! Why am I just finding out now?!”

“Will you keep your voice down and shut up?!”

“Ask her!” Sero chimed in out of nowhere. The group of boys seemed to get closer and closer to Bakugo, suffocating their friend in a small space. 

“No, you idiots! I’m not going to some stupid dance!”

Kaminari pouted and crossed his arms over his chest. “Ya know this is our first time at this dance. And it being our last year here before we go off to high school! No need to be such a party pooper”

Bakugo’s eye twitched. “What did you say you damn extra?!”

“Can you guys stop yelling over there?! We’re trying to look at dresses here!” Mina snapped from across the room, her phone visible in her hand. 

“Hah?! Dresses?! You are going to that stupid dance?!”

“Yes, we are! Is that a problem Bakugo?” Mina retorted back, placing her hands on her hips as she stared at him. Before he could open his mouth, she interrupted him, “Good! That’s what I thought!” she quickly turned around back towards the girls, placing her phone back on the table.

Bakugo gripped the sleeves of his uniform, taking a glance at you. You let your head fall back as you let out a howling laugh. Whatever it was it must have been pretty funny with the way your cheeks heated up as your shoulders shook violently. 

You calmed down and covered your mouth from your giggles, looking over his way. Bakugo. Your (e/c) eyes gazing into his vermillion ones. You waved and cracked a small smile at him, not noticing the way his cheeks tinted. 

He quickly looked away, catching Kirishima’s, Kaminari’s, and Sero’s shit-eating grin. “What?!”

“Oh, our Bakugo has it bad. Do it! We can help you, bro!” Kirishima suggested, lifting his hand to emphasize what he said.

“Hell no. I’m going to do it WITHOUT your help.”

“Ah, so you are?! Awesome!” Sero cheered and high fived the other two boys. “So when?!”

“Don’t fucking worry about it!”

Just as Kirishima was going to say something, the bell interrupted him.  Everyone quickly scattered to their assigned seats. “Hello class” their math teacher waved a lazy hand and yawned, holding a stack of papers under his armpit. 

“Morning Sensei!”

‘This is going to be a long class’ Bakugo thought and sighed softly, elbow propped up on his desk as he rested his head on top of his hand

☽✧ ✦ ✧☾

Lunchtime was rowdy as usual. The constant yells of each class resonated throughout the cafeteria. As usual, you sat with your friends, buzzing with excitement over the dance. 

You happily chewed on your rice as you listened to Mina talk about a dress she wanted. “But my mom said no! Too much but it’s so pretty!” 

“I mean that is a lot of money. So I can see why she would say no” Momo replied as she sipped on her water, opening her bento box. 

Mina let out a dramatic sigh and slouched her shoulders. “I still haven’t got asked yet! I just might ask one of the boys instead!”

You swallowed some of the rice and wiped your mouth with a napkin, placing it back down on the table when you finished using it. “Who will you ask?”

Mina’s sharp gaze fell on you before a grin curled at her lips. “Oh never mind about me! What about you?!”

“W-what about me?!”

“Oh come on! We know you wanna go with a certain..get this!” She waved the rest of the girls closer. Skeptical, you still leaned in. 

“You wanna go with Katsuki!” She practically yelled in excitement.

Your eyes widened. You never wanted the world to swallow you up so badly till now. Your eyes quickly scanned the area if anyone heard. Luckily they didn’t. Or so you thought.

“Him?! I was thinking like Todoroki or maybe Kirishima! But not Bakugo!”

“Can you guys shut up?!” You cried out and covered your face in embarrassment, hoping no one saw your darkened cheeks. 

“Aww Y/LN-San! I think it’s cute!” Uraraka said from across the table, nodding her head as if she was agreeing with herself. 

“I mean he’s not my ideal boy but hey if you like him shoot your shot” Jirou stated with a shrug as she twirled her earphone lobe around her index finger. 

“Yeah, I agree with Jirou ribbit. If it’s what you want, go for it” Asui chimes in and looked up, her green eyes looking up at a walking figure in the distance. “Uh oh..”

“Uh oh?! What do you mean uh oh?!”

“Bakugo is coming this way!” Momo shrieked and fumbled with her chopsticks. “Act natural!”

And that’s what you guys did. Well, more like attempting to act natural. 

You kept your head down hoping if you stayed still and quiet he wouldn’t notice you. 

“Oh, Bakugo! Fancy seeing you here! What do you need?” Mina said, lacing her fingers together under her chin, elbows resting on the table. 

“Nothing from you” he grudgingly mumbled, kicking his heel into the ground. “I want to talk to Y/LN.”

Everyone including you tensed you at this. 

“Y/LN isn’t here right now! Try another time!” Hagakure blurted out, hands covering her mouth after she said that. 

Uraraka lifted her foot from under the table and stomped on Hagakure’s shoe, causing the invisible girl to yelp.

Bakugo stared at the space that he could only assume was her body. “The only one that isn’t here is you.”

You slowly lifted your head to stare at him. “Hi, Bakugo. What did you want to talk about?”

“Alone.”

You stared at him dumbfounded, gripping the blazer of your uniform. “C-Come again?”

“Are you deaf? I said I want to speak to you alone.”

You looked over at the girls for help as they suddenly turned their heads from the situation as if they didn’t see you. 

‘Fakers’ you thought and placed the lid on top of your bento box, closing it. “Alright then. Let’s go.” 

Bakugo curtly nodded, shoving his hands into his front pockets, spinning on his heel and strode off, expecting you to follow.

You scrambled up quickly and tossed a look at your friends from over your shoulder. Each girl had an evil grin on their face. “Bye Y/N!” Ochako said through her fit of giggles, waving at you. 

With your head down you followed the ash-blond boy in front of you. 

Mina looked over at the space and crossed her arms over her chest. “Y/N isn’t here right now?!” She recalled. “Seriously?! Even I could come up with something better!”

“I panicked! I didn’t know what else to say!” Hagakure wailed. 

“Maybe next time just keep your mouth shut!” Mina huffed and watched you leave the cafeteria with Bakugo. 

☽✧ ✦ ✧☾

“Tickets! Get your Dance or Love tickets! Today is the last day to buy them for ¥535! Tomorrow it’s for ¥1000!” A girl behind a stand called out for you and Bakugo as you passed her. 

“Can’t believe I’m doing this,” Bakugo mumbled and stopped a few steps once the both of you made it outside in the courtyard. 

“Uh..why did we come out here?” You questioned and nervously scratched the back of your head, ignoring his intense gaze on you. You didn’t mind talking to Bakugo. But being this close to him and the fact that you were alone made your nerves skyrocket. 

“Can you stop? I can practically sense your nervousness from here.” Bakugo snarled and grunted, looking away. “There’s something I need to say.”

Your silence was a green light for him to continue. 

You watched him take a deep breath. He mumbled something under his breath that you didn’t quite catch. Deep down inside he knew he couldn’t do this. His knees felt weak, he felt the light trickle of sweat and the slight change of his breathing that was now uneven. If you told Bakugo Katsuki in the future that he had trouble asking a girl to a dance, he would laugh in your face and call you stupid. 

“What?”

He repeated slightly louder but still inaudible to your ears. 

“Bakugo I can’t hear you.”

“Are you deaf?! I asked if you want to go to that stupid dance on Saturday!!” 

Your eyebrows raised as your mouth opened in shock. Bakugo Katuski? Asking you to the dance? “No way..” you whispered under your breath as you took a slight step back.

“Hah?! Is that a yes or a no?!”

A sudden wave of shyness flooded throughout your body as you avoided eye contact with him, lowering your head. “Y-yes! I’d like to go with you Bakugo!”

A grin tugged at his lips, his chest puffing out slightly as he jutted his chin up in pride. “Great. I knew you wouldn’t say no. Now we have to buy those shitty tickets.”

“But I don’t have yen on me! I can’t get it yet!”

“Damn you run your mouth huh? Just shut up and I’ll buy it for you.”

You shyly nodded, feeling the nape of your neck heat up until your face felt warm. He let out a low chuckle. “Come on. I know you’re slow”

Both of you walked up to the stand, the girl’s eyes lighting up as you approached “Oh hi Y/LN! Bakugo!” The pink-haired girl cheered, taking her register out from the bottom. 

“Hi, Hatsume!”

“Loudmouth.”

Hatsume let out a howling laugh, wiping the upcoming tears. “Oh, Bakugo you’re so funny! How can I help you two?!”

“We would l-”

“2 tickets to this stupid fucking dance.” Bakugo interrupted, fishing his money out of his pocket and slammed in on the table, causing you and Hatsume to jump up at his aggression. 

She clapped her hands together. “Awesome! I look forward to seeing you both there!”

After an exchange of small talk from you, and maybe a bit of insults from Bakugo that Hatsume simply laughed off with a wave of her hand, the two of you finally made your way back to the cafeteria in silence, where both of your friend groups were waiting for you.

“Listen.” Bakugo abruptly said, grabbing your arm at the last minute. “You better not embarrass me at this dance. And you better dress nice.”

“I could say the same about you. Maybe come with a proper dress attire attitude and we should be just peachy!” You teased, poking your tongue at him as you patted his cheek. “See you later!”

And with that, you made it back towards your table. All the girls were leaning forward on the table, waiting in anticipation. 

Bakugo watched your retreating form, his arms by his side. A slight tug at the corner of his lips had him shaking his head. He let out a faint noise of satisfaction, returning to his friends.

“SO?!” Momo screeched and grabbed at your shoulders, shaking you gently. “What happened?!”

You bit back a smile as you reached into your skirt pocket, taking out a pink rectangular piece of paper. “He asked!”

Your table erupted in screams as you were practically dragged to sit down. 

“How did he ask?!” 

“Did he force you?! Threaten you?!”

“Mina!” Ochako huffed and pinched her arm. “Obviously if she was forced she wouldn’t have said yes!”

You nodded your head eagerly, legs bouncing up and down in excitement. “He just straight up asked and I said yes! I didn’t have money and he bought me my ticket!”

Once again your table erupted in excited squeals. 

“Jeez, I wonder what they’re so excited about” Kaminari mumbled, head resting on his hand as he stared at your table. “It’s like they found out they won a ton of money.”

Sero nodded in agreement. “Yeah, man. I mean it’s nothing really out of the ordinary but this is too much. What the hell happened?”

Kirishima lifted his head as Bakugo slid in the space beside him. He noticed the slight change in his posture, his shoulders pushed back a bit, and the smug smile on his face.

“Yo Bakubro what happened back there?!”

“Huh?” Bakugo looked over. “What the hell do you mean?!”

“Well, you look different! Spit it out! What happened?!”

“Yeah, man! You aren’t being mean right now! Did you ask?!” Kamainari whined, banging his fist on the lunch table.

Bakugo’s cheeks tinted as he crossed his arms over his chest. “Shut your mouth idiot!”

“Aw come on man! Shouldn’t we deserve to know?! We told you to tell her anyway!”

“You guys didn’t tell me shit!”

His group of friends gazed at him, unamused. 

“Fine fine!” Bakugo groaned and placed his arms behind his head. “I asked and she said yes.”

“No way you did it?!” Sero yelled and stood up abruptly, hands gripping the edge of the table. 

“Yes, idiot why is that shocking?!”

“Well,” Kaminari started, scratching his chin. “You called it stupid, said it was a waste of time and didn’t want to ask someone,” he said, counting his fingers with each point he had.

Bakugo growled and looked over at Kirishima to see if it was true. The spiky redhead simply nodded.

“So what?! I have a date and you losers don’t!”

“And?!” The three said in unison. 

“And it makes me better than you three!”

☽✧ ✦ ✧☾

2 days passed and it was the dance of the dance and it was safe to say that you were nervous as hell.

Your mom helped you with your hair, leaving it in a braided bun with two locks of hair, framing your face. You felt like you didn’t need makeup and opted out to using blush instead. You gripped the paper in between your fingers. 

Today you felt that it had to be perfect. Sure you’ve had your moments where you were alone with Bakugo, but that was before you figured out you had feelings for him. ‘You better dress nice’ you thought, recalling his words. Even though they were sarcastic and playful, the voice in the back of your head was starting to eat at you. 

Your mom dropped you off at the Bakugo Residence. Bakugo only lived 3 minutes from the school and both of you didn’t mind walking. In your mind, it was an easier way to dig deeper into Katsuki’s character. You let out a shaky breath and lifted a hand, ringing the doorbell. “Okay, it’s going to be okay..”

If you listened closely you could hear the faintest of arguing inside as footsteps approached the door. 

“Hag I said I had the door!!”

“And does it look like I care?! Don’t you dare use your quirk inside the fucking house Katsuki!”

You gulped and clasped your hands in front of you, jumping up at the way the door was violently swung open. A gasp left the woman’s mouth as she made her way to you, wrapping her arms around you. “Y/N right?! Oh, you look so pretty! Katsuki get your ass over here! Doesn’t she look beautiful?!” The woman yelled who you could only assume was his mother.

“Oh, I’m so sorry! I’m Mitsuki!” She said and opened the door for you to enter, which you did. 

“You have a beautiful place!”

“Oh thank you! Katsuki should learn a thing from you! Katsuki get over here already!” 

A grumbling blushing mess, Katsuki made his way over to the both of you, hands stuffed in his pockets as he had his usual slouch. 

“Masaru! Get the camera! Get closer you two! Katsuki don’t you dare think about touching her inappropriately!”

“Hah?! I’m not stupid!!”

“Shut up and let me take the fucking picture!” Mitsuki snapped and took the camera from her husband.

You couldn’t ignore the blush on your face as you got closer to Bakugo, his arm wrapping around your waist but not touching you. Sure he was an asshole sometimes but he was still a gentleman when it came to these types of things. 

You smiled for the camera as Bakugo didn’t, his famous scowl present on his face. On the outside, it looked like he didn’t care, but deep down he was shitting bricks. He could smell the faint perfume you wore, the way your body felt next to his. Oh yeah, he had it bad. 

After a couple of pictures to capture memories, she walked up to the both of you and placed her hands on Katsuki’s shoulders. “Be safe you two! And you! Be a man and treat her right okay?!”

“Yes, I get it! Get your hands off before you ruin my shirt!”

A smile tugged at her lips as she ruffled Bakugo’s hair, pushing him out the door. “Have fun! Walk home safely! Bye Y/N!”

“Bye!” You said in return, waving at her as you walked off with Bakugo.

Bakugo looked down at your moving form beside him.  You wore a burgundy dress that stopped at least 3 inches above your knee. It had lace that started at the base of your neck and went all the way down to both arms, the intricate patterns adoring your skin along with white shoes.

“You look..not bad” He muttered out and mentally kicked himself. 

“T-thank you Bakugo! You don’t look bad either!” You teased and glanced at his outfit. He wore a white button-up tucked into black pants. A perfect outfit in your head. 

‘He looks amazing’ you thought and bit your lip, turning your head forward, holding your phone tightly in one hand.

It didn’t take long to reach the school. Upon arrival, they immediately asked for ID and tickets which both of you obliged.

He walked behind you and hesitantly placed a hand on the middle of your back, noticing the way you tensed up at the contact before relaxing.

A grin made its way on his features as he guided you through the sea of people. The gym was covered in decorations, to heart balloons and red streamers everyone, an occasional cupid doll hanging from the wall. If it was anyone else, Katsuki would have gagged at the thought, but since it was you, he could endure 3 hours of this love nonsense. 

“Y/N!!” a voice screamed your name. You quickly turned around and gasped, stumbling back a bit at the sudden impact of Ochako running at you. “You look so pretty! Sorry, Bakugo we’re stealing her for a bit! Bye!” she laughed and tugged your wrist. 

You stumbled after her. “S-sorry!” you called out to him, a smile on your face.

Bakugo hummed and shook his head, gripping the box his mom had given him to give you as he walked away to find his group of friends who were hogging around the food table. “If you guys keep eating like that you will turn into literal fucking pigs!”

Kaminari looked up, his mouth stuffed with a cookie as some of the frosting stayed on the outline of his mouth. “Nu-uh!”

Kirishima swallowed his food and slapped Bakugo’s back. “You look good Bakubro! Super manly in my opinion! But where’s Y/N?”

“I bet that she got scared last minute and ran away!” Sero snickered and ducked at a punch that was coming for his face. “Watch it! My mom ironed this!”

“Like I care! Besides, her stupid friends came and swopped her away from me. Probably be seeing her sometime later tonight.”

☽✧ ✦ ✧☾

The night was amazing. The dance would be one of your favorite memories of all time. You danced with your friends without paying mind to the songs they played. Your group was a bit out there with everyone staring at you as if you guys were crazy, but who cares, let them stare.

The night ended with a nice slow dance of ‘love’ as Present Mic, the DJ stated. It was awkward at first, the proximity with Katsuki. Your hands placed on his shoulders as he had his hands on your waist. You kept your eyes averted anywhere but on him.

“You know you can look up at me right and not at our fucking feet. I’m sure you know how to move without looking”

Your face heated up as you felt the heat reach the tips of your ears. “I d-don’t know what you’re talking about!” You stuttered and weren’t able to meet his eyes. 

He let out a deep sigh and brought you closer, practically forcing your head to rest on top of his chest. 

You inhaled deeply as your hands gripped his shirt. 

“Now just stop trembling and just enjoy the dance” he muttered into your hair as both of you swayed to the music. 

After a few seconds, you closed your eyes, rubbing your head under his neck. He glanced down at your peaceful face and kissed the crown of your head gently before placing his head on yours, his arms around your waist tightening. 

☽✧ ✦ ✧☾

The night ended quicker than you wanted it too. You would admit to Bakugo in the future when the both of you could laugh at the memory, that it was nice to be in his arms, that’s if you guys were still friends. 

You waited in front of the school for him. He was on the phone with his mom. 

“Yes, I know! Well, I can’t do it if we’re on the phone any longer!... Yeah yeah, I got it! Bye!” he snapped and hung up, shoving the phone into his pocket as he walked up to you. “Sorry, she wouldn’t shut her fucking mouth.”

“Heh. It’s okay I didn’t mind. We should get going yeah?”

“There’s something I want to give to you though.”

An eyebrow quirked up as you tilted your head to the side, a puzzled look adoring your face. “Yeah? What is it?”

He reached into his pocket, with a grunt he pulled out a heart-shaped box and shoved it into your hands. “There.”

“..a heart? What’s in it?”

“Stones. What else would be inside dumbass? There’s candy in there. Apparently, the brand is called Candy Love and my old hag thought it would be a good idea to give it to you. Whatever just take the fucking candy without asking questions got it?” He said in a gruff tone, looking somewhere else other than your eyes. 

You let out a giggle that turned into a full-blown laugh. You held the heart-shaped box to your chest as your shoulders shook. “Wow, you’re funny! I’m glad I came with you!”

“Yeah yeah whatever let’s just get you the fuck home”

☽✧ ✦ ✧☾

BONUS

You stared at the photo of you and Katsuki at your first dance together on your phone. That photo was over 7 years old now. Both of you were now 22 years old. You cherished it with all your heart. Even though there were times you would tease him about it, he would always brush it off and threaten to delete it, which you knew he wouldn't.

You were sprawled out on your bed, wearing one of Katsuki’s shirts. The ash-blond male walked out of the bathroom, a towel wrapped around his hips. 

“About time! You take so long Katsu!” you whined and sat up on your knees, placing your hands on your lap. 

He scoffed and cradled your cheeks in his hand, squishing them together as he placed a gentle kiss on your forehead. “Yeah, whatever babe. Go get ready. We have dinner reservations in an hour and thirty but you take too long.”

“Fine fine I’m going.” You pouted and gave him a gentle kiss before pulling away. You climbed off the bed and jumped at the sudden contact of Bakugo’s hand hitting your ass. “H-hey watch it!”

He grinned mischievously at you as you held your head high, walking off to the direction in the bathroom and closed it once you entered.

He let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and opened his boxer drawer, digging his hand in before pulling out a heart-shaped box. 

Candy Love

He quickly opened it and let out a sigh of relief. The ring was still sitting inside, patiently for him to ask you the most important question ever. 

‘Katsuki!” you called out for him. “I need help!”

“Coming!” he yelled and placed the box back inside the drawer, grabbing a pair of boxers and quickly slipped them on. A soft sigh escaped his lips as he ran his hand through his hair.

“Katsuki!!”

“Shitty woman I said I’m coming!!”

[yungidreamer]

Reluctance

Summary: Sometimes holding on to things that one shouldn’t, has consequences: Mingi has fallen out of love but hasn’t said good bye. It might have been kinder if he did.

Word count: 2.2k

Content warnings: Angst, lots of emotional pain, a long drawn out breakup.

Song: Are You With Me by Nilu

“Hey Mingles,” she greeted happily when she heard the front door open and close. “Welcome back! How was work today?”

“It was fine,” he shrugged, sprawling out on the opposite side of the couch.

“Fine is good,” she replied brightly, despite his tone. “Better than bad at least.”

“Yeah, I guess,” Mingi blithely replied, turning on the television and keeping his attention there.

“Oh hey, about tomorrow,” she added, a little tightness in her tone as she pushed forward. “The party is on Saturday so we should go and buy our outfits. We can meet at the store after you’re done with work since it’s close to there. Does that work?”

“Yeah sure,” he sighed. “Whatever.”

“I know it isn’t your favorite thing,” she offered solicitously. “So I really appreciate you going with me.”

He didn’t respond, or even really acknowledge that she had said anything so she let it drop. It was for the best. He hated being pushed. He hated being nagged. And she hated when he was mad at her. It always made her feel… small. She just wanted to love him, help him, make his life a little better and sometimes it felt like she didn’t anymore.

Mingi came when she asked him too, even when it was clear he didn’t want to, and he did what he had to in order to make things work. It was enough. It had to be. So she fell into the small silence she had become used to being when he didn’t want to talk.

She sat quietly, giving him space to be himself and to do his thing, not really saying anything until it was time for dinner. Even then all she asked was if he wanted her to serve him some. He nodded, keeping his attention on what he was watching. She brought his food with a smile, daring to lean in to give his cheek a quick peck before leaving him to eat and watch in peace.

“Hey, it’s good to see you,” she greeted as Mingi approached her and the entrance to the store. “With any luck this won’t take very long.” She added perkily as she reached for his hand. A sliver of relief flooded her when he took it today, since he didn’t always anymore. His hand felt warm and strong and a sudden pang went through her at the memory of the comfort it used to give her.

It was slowly getting harder to tell herself that it was just a rough patch, that he had just had a rough day… that it was just a bad mood. It will pass, she used to tell herself. Then I’ll have that sweet Mingi with the gummy smile and infectious laugh. But weeks had turned into a month, and then months. She knew it wasn’t really getting better, but those little glimpses, the little flashes of moments that came now and again kept that tiny dying spark alive.

“I already got a couple of things I needed,” she explained flashing the shopping bags in her other hands at him. “I figured I could take care of it before you got here and make the whole thing go just a little faster for you.”

“Okay, that’s good,” he nodded, eyes scanning the store ahead of them. “I need a shirt and a jacket. The pants I have are still fine.”

“Good,” she nodded, unconsciously squeezing his hand a little tighter as she looked around, wanting to find where the men’s section was as efficiently as possible.

“Do you have to squeeze that hard?” he huffed, pulling his hand away. “It’s not like I’m five and you have to keep me from getting hit by a car in the street.”

“Sorry,” she apologized, tucking her hand into her pocket and falling back to let him lead the way. He was taller anyway, he’d be able to see the section better anyway. Besides, it’s the section he always shops in, of course he would know where it is better than she would.

“Hey babe, what are you doing?” Mingi asked, coming up behind her to hug her as she stood mixing something at the kitchen counter.

“Making cookies,” she giggled, bumping her head into his affectionately as he tucked his chin into her shoulder.

“Can I have a taste?” He questioned, giving her his brightest ‘you’ll say yes because you love me’ look.

“Just a little,” she agreed, taking a little pinch between two fingers for him. “There is raw egg in it so, let's be safe.”

“Mmmmmm,” he made an exaggerated sound of happiness as he chewed the little bit of dough. “My baby cooks the best food.”

“Thank you, sweetheart,” she kissed his cheek before going back to give the dough its last few stirs to mix it. “I’m just happy that you like it.”

“Your pants are grey, right?” She asked, looking out over the section of dress shirts that surrounded them.

“Charcoal,” he corrected as he looked through a pile of jewel toned shirts.

“Right, charcoal,” she took the correction quietly, swallowing past the lump in her throat. “I think those could be a really good choice to go with it. You always did have innately good taste.”

He acknowledged the compliment with a brief grunt and she let herself lapse into that familiar untroublesome silence. Usually if she was quiet she didn’t bother him at least.

Following him a few steps behind, she watched, only speaking up to offer to hold the couple of shirts he decided to try on while he continued to look around. Passing them to her before he sighed and headed off to another table to look through the shirts piled there.

“Good morning,” Mingi’s deep voice had a singsong tone as he pranced into the room where she was still huddled happily under the covers. “I have a surprise for the birthday girl.” He stepped up beside the bed and proudly placed a try of food on her lap. “Tada! Here look, it's all your favorites. Eggs, bacon, grits, and an english muffin with melty cheese!”

“Oh hun it smells so good,” she moaned, squeezing her hands together excitedly. “I don’t deserve this. Thank you.” Reaching up she pulled his face down to give him a grateful kiss. “You really are the best boyfriend ever.”

“Only for my best girl.” He gave her a glowing smile and sat down beside her in the bed. “After all, you did so much more for me on my big day.”

“Not really,” she demurred, blushing as she waved away the complement. “It was just a cake and stuff.”

“Cake and dinner and drinks and a whole evening of my favorite things,” he told her, giving her shoulder a light poke as he spoke.

“It was all stuff I liked, too,” she assured him. “I always have fun doing that sort of stuff with you.”

“Like I said,” he told her affectionately. “Only for my best girl.”

“Do you want me to come in and look?” she asked as they got near the dressing rooms.

“If you want,” he sighed. “I can pick them myself, too.”

“I’ll just stay over here,” she said, leaning against the wall near the end of the corridor, close to the clothes return rack.

“Okay,” he sounded tired as he picked a room and pulled the heavy curtain closed behind him. She stood, looking at her hands and waiting for the ache in her chest to loosen just enough that she didn’t feel like she could burst into tears at any moment. It wouldn’t help and it would probably make anything worse.

Sometimes she wished he would just… yell at her or say he hated her. It would have been easier to bear than the slow slip into disgusted indifference everything had become between them. At least if he hated her, he still cared enough to feel that towards her. It would be something. Or it might be enough to help her walk away. Kill that hope she held clutched in her hand like a firefly that still barely flickered.

Mingi stepped out of the dressing room, dressed in one of the new shirts and jackets. He looked so good in the deep red and the dark grey that looked like it would match his dress pants well. He had always been pretty enough to take her breath away. The red contrasted with the light beige of his soft skin and the dark mess of his brown hair. All that was missing was that smile she missed so badly.

“It looks good,” she smiled at him but he didn’t look closely enough to see the way one corner of her mouth quivered, unable to keep up the facade she tried so hard to keep. “But you always look good in colors like that.”

“It’s fine,” he said looking at himself in the set of mirrors at the end of the corridor. ��I think I want a cool color instead though.”

“That would look good, too,” she agreed as he walked back into the dressing room and closed the curtain. She waited, trying to become invisible to the people who came in to try things on. She didn’t want to be a bother. She didn’t really want to be much of anything.

Mingi came out again dressed in the same jacket but this time with a sapphire shirt on under it. As she had known he would, he looked princely in the outfit. He always did. This time though, she didn’t offer an opinion and just let him look at himself and decide if he liked it on his own.

“Well?” He huffed, turning on her impatiently with his arms raised in a sort of mocking tada motion.

“You look good,” she replied quickly. “But you always look good.”

“Fine, good enough,” he exhaled and turned towards the dressing room again. “I’ll just try the other jacket to be sure.” He didn’t bother to close the curtain just to change the jacket and his voice carried through the space as he grumbled, “I can’t believe I have to spend money on this.”

She had known he didn’t want to come even if he never said it outloud. It came through in every sigh, it came through in the grimace he wore when anything related came up, it came through in his indifference as to how important it was for her. Still, she had been able to let herself pretend. These sort of things weren’t the kind of thing he had ever really liked doing and as long as they both pretended, then she could just tell herself that is all this was.

But those few words finally felt like enough that she couldn’t pretend anymore. When he stepped out in the second jacket she put her bags down and stepped forward, coming to stand just behind him. This jacket suited him even better than the first, the cut emphasizing the breadth of his shoulders and the trim tuck of his waist. He looked… so good.

As she quietly looked at him she noticed that the collar of his shirt had gotten caught on the collar of the jacket. She put a gentle hand on his arm and he looked down at her, annoyance clearly written on his face.

“The collar is stuck, let me help,” she said softly. A little of the annoyance faded from his face as he leaned down to let her fix it. “You really don’t want to come do you?” She asked as her fingers worked, careful to look at what she was doing rather than into his face.

“I said I’d go, what more do you want from me?” He asked, straightening up as she finished.

“I just…” want you to be happy again, she couldn’t finish it aloud. “It’s not just the event, is it?”

“What do you mean?” He pinched the bridge of his nose and clenched his jaw.

“You don’t love me anymore, do you,” she bit her lip to hold back the tears after finally getting the question out.

“I… don’t know,” he admitted. “It’s not like it used to be.”

“It’s okay,” she said, smoothing the lapels of the jacket against his chest. “I always knew I loved you more than you loved me. I thought maybe I could love you enough for both of us. But I don’t think I can.”

“I… I’m sorry,” he said dumbly, unable to think of something else to say.

“Don’t be sorry,” she offered him a watery smile as the tears she couldn’t hold back any longer rolled hot and large down her cheeks. “Just find a reason to smile again, okay?”

Giving the jacket a final nostalgic brush of fingertips, she let her hands drop and turned to pick up the bags she had left back in her little corner. Without looking back, she walked away, determined not to break any further in front of him. There was time later when she could crumble and mourn all the dreams that had finally been killed for her.

Mingi watched her go and couldn’t help but feel like he was letting go of something that he would never get back, even as he felt a pressure that had been resting in the center of his chest for far too long finally fade. He stood there until he could no longer see her, only then changing back into his own clothes, not even bothering to hang up what he had tried on.

At least it was finally done.

Masterlist

[sevsnapeposts]

Snapetober Day 1: Autumn.

hi everyone! today finally starts the snapetober, are you excited? i sure am. so i decided to write for it, but will eventually (once october is done) do art for every day. today we start with a recollection of memories throughout the years from Prue's POV. you can read it over in ao3 if you'd like, and also if you'd be kind enough, go give me some kudos over there. thanks, hope you enjoy~.

Day 1 - Autumn.

---

1993.

Prue was on the Hogwarts Express, heading to London, where she would meet the Malfoys to spend the holidays with them. Usually her mood would be pessimistic and she would find herself terrified to imagine what was going to get into her room on any of those nights, but honestly, the girl couldn't think of anything other than her Potions professor.

If she closed her eyes, she couldn't help but sigh, remembering each second intensely, her heart racing as she imagined his face shocked at her, at the actions she had taken. Her pulse reached its peak when she recalled everything she saw then, as if time had stopped to give her the opportunity to perfectly memorize the details, even the smallest of them: Black hair surrounding the pale face, agitated by the staggering and the autumn air that little by little became more wintry with the passing of the days; confused, puzzled, and a tinge of scared,black eyes, unsure what the hell was going on, and also (and Prue blushed just thinking about it) expectant, hopeful; pale skin gently reddened at certain points, such as the cheekbones and the tip of the nose, due to the cold and, she dared to suspect, due to her, to her closeness to him; and finally, the area where her attention had focused the most: His lips, thin and pale, slightly parted, perhaps because they were ready to say "what the bloody hell is wrong with you, Pennyworth?"sentence that was never heard.

The girl had wondered many times, over the last few weeks, what it would be like to feel those lips on hers. Were they as cold as the words that his owner spoke with them? Or would they be warm and kind like his hands that day that he accompanied her in her solitude?

She smiled widely, for the second time in her life, thinking that she finally knew the answers to her questions.

1994.

If there was one thing she never thought could happen to her, it was having a boyfriend. She knew she was complicated and difficult, and she wouldn't have been surprised to spend the rest of her life not romantically intimate with anyone… But it had happened, much to her surprise.

And, even to her greatest surprise, something happened that had seemed even more unlikely: she was the one who ended the relationship. He didn’t throw her away, he didn’t abandon her as practically everyone else, he didn’t leave her. Even when the relationship ended, he didn’t do any of that, because he was still with her, as her friend, perfectly understanding that one does not rule in love.

It happens that she wasn’t able to bear someone else's heart, not when she knew that hers was beating strongly for that man with eyes as dark as his robes. Prue understood now, sitting under one of the huge trees that marked the beginning of the Forbidden Forest, surrounded by brown and orange and yellow and green leaves, that it wasn’t that she would never find someone for her, but rather, that she didn’t want someone other than him.

1995.

Prue was hating badly that year. Not even the cookie-scented breeze provided any consolation for how gross it was to have that damn pink toad (ruining her favorite color, by the way) shutting down basically everything good at Hogwarts.

What did serve as comfort, however, was the fact that Severus sympathized with her at her annoyance for that woman. One day, she had even managed to make him laugh — Severus bloody Snape, laughing openly in front of her. Prue had never seen anything so cute, something that could completely melt her cold heart. Her powerful memory perfectly captured that moment, treasuring it alongside the memory of two years ago. Those were things that she would never forget, things that would forever be in her heart, and things that were reproduced in her imagination while the pink toad taught her.

1996.

The echo of the rain traveled all the way down from the surface of the Dark Lake, the air up there being so wild that it dragged a lot of the fallen leaves and twigs into the water, making everyone thankful to be inside the castle, warm from the fire in the chimneys, eating pumpkin and butter biscuits.

Prue wasn't eating any biscuits however, but she didn’t mind. From the huge window she could clearly see how the Lake was disturbed by the storm, even though she was several feet below the surface. Beside her lay her teacher, fast asleep and more than likely exhausted. She took advantage of that moment to admire his features, so relaxed and soft, doing justice to the kind of person he was, to the feelings that were in him, and in her, and between them. She wanted to touch him, and caress him, and wander over his skin again, every part of his skin, with her lips.

Her memory was prodigious, and she knew every part of him.

But her body wasn't, and she was determined to tattoo her skin with his.

1997.

It wasn't going to be easy, she knew, even though they'd only been in school for a couple of months. Voldemort wasn't there, personally, but all the bloody putrefaction in him was. It was flooding London, and Diagon Alley, and Hogsmeade, and Hogwarts, and Severus. He looked worse every day, as if his own death was drawing closer and closer, and Prue knew it was a very likely possibility.

Not only was he at risk. Less, true, but she was also in danger, Voldemort's gaze was on her, very interested in her performance and with a clear desire to recruit her. She was powerful, young, gifted in Dark Arts and from a pure-blood family: Everything Voldemort valued.

And Prue was terrified, even though her expression was as blank as ever. For her to a lesser extent, for him mainly, and for whatever was in store for the Magical World.

But she would be strong, for the same reasons that terrified her, and one way or another, she would see Severus laugh again.

1998.

It had been several months since things were finally over, as far as Prue was concerned. The school year had started a bit late, but Hogwarts had finally reopened its doors to students. Minerva McGonagall was the headmistress, and Severus went back to the Potions, and she went back to him.

It was the first Saturday of the year. Severus was sitting next to her, both hiding in one of Hogwarts' secret gardens, where no one could find them except, perhaps, McGonagall, but the woman liked Severus (and Prue) enough to not interrupt their intimate time together.

‘Intimate’ as in holding hands, her head resting on his shoulder, whilst silently watching the sky, as so many years ago they had done. In the center of the garden was a tree, with leaves that were turning more and more yellow and orange. INot a single one had fallen yet, and Prue, for some reason, really wanted to witness the event.

The young girl, almost a woman now, turned her piercing green eyes from it to her companion. He was looking back at her now, black eyes with a different glow, one that brought life to his entire face and made her heart race like a restless child in summer. Without saying anything, because there was no need, the young woman approached him, closing her eyes, soon feeling the soft contact of his lips for the first time in a long time.

When Prue pulled away from Severus, out of the corner of her eye she noticed movement, and she turned just in time to see an orange and red-hued leaf hit the ground after gliding gently in the wind. She smiled like she only did when she was with him. Before giving him time to ask, because she knew that he had noticed her smile and felt the joy that basically radiated from her, the young woman spoke:

"I would like to spend the rest of my autumns with you”.

Severus didn't reply, but his smile said more than enough.

[vinylhazza]

Can you write a concept about Ethan spanking y/n pu**y as a punishment hehehe?🥰

mhmm i’m listening 🤤👋🏻😻

the relationship you had with ethan was quite vanilla. he was never the type to get particularly rough, even if you could tell clearly as day he wanted to. he did it for your sake of course - knowing you’ve never been in a relationship that was anything but vanilla.

you craved more. everytime you had sex, you could see the apparent crazed hunger in his eyes - the urge to pound you into the mattress growing the more you whimpered and whined - sighing in his ear when he hit a special spot deep inside your pussy. but he still kept that slow pace, rocking leisurely into you, his lip tucked under his teeth.

the fear of telling him and being shot down with worry of hurting you was, of course, a worry of yours. but you were tougher than he thought, and though he was extra cautious with you, you knew your honesty would bring out the wild side in him you’ve been wanting to see for so long. you were nervous about the conversation - not wanting to sound stupid or foolish in front of him and be denied of something you wanted so badly you’ve been having wet dreams about it.

it wasn’t that he wasn’t doing enough for you, it was that you wanted to be well, treated like a dirty little slut so to say. be thrown around like a rag doll. have him whisper every naughty thought he’s ever thought about you into your ear while he slammed you against a wall and fucked you senseless. you wanted to be his bratty little girl. you wanted him to punish you for misbehaving, his anger fueling more of that blind lust he had hiding behind the surface. you wanted to call him the names that flooded your thoughts since you’d first laid eyes on him. daddy, being one that has nearly slid past your lips in the bedroom more times than you could count.

but you never mentioned a word. not until you were ready. and when you DID mention it on a saturday wrapped in each other on his couch, deep into a conversation about this that and the other - ethans eyes almost popped straight from his head. you’d been acting weird the past few days, he just never assumed the issue being you wanted him to be this ferocious beast or something.

“i mean...yeah i’m into the rough shit. but if you ever get too uncomfortable, you need to tell me. i just don’t want to hurt you,” he’d said, a questioning look in his eye.

“you won’t hurt me, e. i want this...i want you to fuck me,” you promised, gripping at his t-shirt and tugging, attempting to persuade him.

he was waiting for even a hint of doubt. but he saw none. you had stripped him of his clothing in an instant, done with the mushy “make love to me” bullshit. you wanted a hard fuck. to make him impressed by your sexual temptress side just waiting to be unleashed.

that night had been one for the books. he grabbed you by your hair tight, making a make-shift ponytail with his hand. you whimpered, letting your thoughts finally spill from your mouth without that filter being in the way - at last you could finally let him know what kind of wild bitch he started dating. you weren’t just the shy bookworm he assumed you were - you could also fulfill his wildest sexual fantasies if given the opportunity. you gave him the best smirk you could muster, the harsh grip on your hair being the fuel to your fire.

“daddy please,” you whined, a withering mess under his intense stare. it’s the most sinister he’s ever looked at you. you immediately knew you made the right decision.

“daddy huh? you like that shit don’t you angel? yeah that’s right ride my thigh like the dirty bitch you are,” he grunted, hoisting you onto his lap where you then grinded down on his exposed muscular thigh, “come on make daddy proud of you.”

and you had. for the next few weeks you and ethan explored this new and improved sexual drive of yours that had been hidden for so long. ethan had discovered you were in fact the brattiest girl he’d ever come in contact with. the punishments were your favorite part - ethan was relentless. you learned quickly he wasn’t one for sarcasm or sass. your snarky comments usually got you bent over, ass up in the air, fingers shoved down your throat while he fucked into like a madman. your screaming could be heard for miles, you imagined.

today had been a day of tension. one that involves ethan repeatedly telling you to “chill” in front of his friends. you weren’t nescassarily acting out, but were testing him each minute that passed. your hand slid up his thigh innocently, rubbing over his growing bulge at your touch. the group had no idea, all focusing on one another, their empty plates resting before them on the table. just a quiet dinner with some friends, was turning into something else very quickly.

just as soon as he growled in your ear to “stop or you won’t like what happens after they leave” but of course he knew better. he knew better than to think you could possibly stop once you’ve started your tortuous little game. you continued your slow assent up his thigh, grabbing at his dick through his pants. he jolted in his seat, fist slamming on the table, eyes in a scowl when the rest of the group turned to look at him, visibly worried something might be wrong.

“you okay ethan?” your friend Hannah soothes, her sympathetic nature really shining through.

“um...” he clears his throat, swallowing thickly, “i’m not really feeling too well, i think it’s best if we finish this up another time.”

there wasn’t too much fuss over dinner being cut short, everyone clearing the house within a reasonable amount of time. you stood by the arm of the couch, knowing the ending result, your heart beating out of your chest with anticipation.

ethan slams the door, palm flat against the wooden frame, eyes burning through the wood in front of him. he was angry. you knew he was angry. you had been teasing him all night, sending him dirty texts throughout the night, leaning over to kiss his neck when no one was looking. it drove him crazy.

“you know what has to happen,” he grumbles, eyes never leaving the door.

“i was counting on it,” you giggle, smirking at his dark tone. it was low, so low he could feel it rattle his own chest.

“go to the fucking bedroom,” he snapped, turning around to point down the hallway, watching you skip down the dark tunnel and into the bedroom, hopping on the bed to wait for him.

he takes his time, knowing you’re waiting and wanting to make you squirm a little. just like he did at dinner. monkey see monkey do. but when he came into the room...boy did you need to take a deep breath. he’s already stripped himself of his shirt, his bare chiseled chest a blank canvas for the many, many love bites and scratches you’re about to litter it with.

you removed your clothes just as soon as his body was rid of his, knees dipping into the bed to pull you close by your ankles, ripping your undergarments off with such strength you couldn’t be mad he’d torn them to shreds. he was a beast when it came to punishment. no remorse. just angry, fuck-me eyes and hands that don’t leave your body until he’s done.

he positions you in a doggy position, noting that your legs are already smeared with your arousal, clearly enjoying this way too much already. he takes his time in easing himself in, dipping the tip in, waiting for your moan, and continuing in until he was settled at the base, sheathed in your clenching cunt. he didn’t take a second to let you adjust before he’s slamming into you with a force that has you gripping the headboard, shutting your eyes tight and biting at your bottom lip, a moan caught at the back of your throat. this was so much better than vanilla.

“a couple of weeks ago, you never would have dreamed you’d be bent over taking my cock huh?” he growls, digging his nails into the flesh of your ass, dragging them down to leave harsh red lines in their wake- not deep enough to cut you - just deep enough to leave a message, “such a disobedient little thing. you can’t listen. always have to run that mouth until i shut you up,” he groans on, leaning over and hugging an arm around your waist, driving his hips into your backside with harsh slaps, “you fucking love it, huh? love when i fuck you like this filthy bitch?”

you let out a squeal at that, “yesss oh my fuck right there right there right there keep- fuck right th- daddy don’t stop don’t stop,” you rock back, tilting your hips up and down to swallow him in your pussy, hands flat against the headboard, hair swaying around your face with the force of his thrusts. a tear esecapes your eye, one of desperate need to let go, but knowing much better than that.

you would think he loved this sort of thing, the encouragement, the frenzied pleasure of his lover. but it only made him angrier. tease him and then speak without permission, and tell him what to do?

“did i say you could speak?” he stops just as you were nearing your climax, that fire still present but feeling less and less like an exploding ball, now a dull puddle. his hips stilled, his cock twitching inside of you - he was close as well. it made you clench your walls around him tighter.

“turn around,” he ordered lowly, spanking your right ass cheek with his instruction. you jump at the sting it leaves behind, excited to see the bright red hand print when you’re done. you don’t hesitate to pull yourself away from him, whining at the emptiness you feel so suddenly, but immediately grin as you land on your back. you can finally see his flushed face, the blush complimenting his skin well. he’s wearing a thin silver chain, a ring you bought him because you wanted to let him know he wasn’t the only one allowed to buy you jewelry, and an earring that you finally convinced him to put in.

before you could make a peep, his hand is smothering your mouth, quieting whatever insignificant comment that was going to flood from you. he didn’t have time for the conversation. not unless he told you so. you loved this side of him, this disgusting, dirty, mean side. but there’s still a hint of that soft boy he was before just as he leans down to press his lips against your forehead quickly - sneaking just a bit of his affection in.

“now, what do bad girls get?” he glowered, his glare returning as quickly as it left. he wanted an answer this time, his brow raising up. his hand slipped away from your mouth for only a minute, letting you squeak out a weak answer in fear of his wrath. ethan was a different type of man.

“spankings daddy,” you simpered, giving him your best ‘i’m a good girl’ lip pout.

he smoothes his hands between your thighs, spreading your legs as wide as they’ll go, thumbs sitting at your folds but unmoving, waiting.

“and what do bad girls do while getting spankings angel?”

“they scream,” you smile, dazzling him with your beauty for just a second. you can tell he’s blushing just a bit harder, but covers it up with the biting of his bottom lip.

“that’s right baby, and what do you scream?”

“thank you.” a whisper now, reaching a hand up to smooth down his chest, following the lines of his abs and down to his v line, swirling your fingers across the skin and giggling at the goosebumps you cause from such a simple caress.

“mhmm thats right and what else do they do dirty girl?”

“apologize for being naughty,” you wine, clenching at your own words. his thumbs are rubbing at the sensitive nerves at your core, testing how far he can go until you can’t take the teasing anymore.

he gives a curt nod, staring down at your clenching cunt with a smirk, too excited to give you his punishment. you wondering for a minute how he was going to give you spanking in the position you’re in, but soon find out the answer when he delivers a harsh slap to your pussy, your hips jolting up in the air.

“fuck,” you breathe, writhing from the tingles shooting up your center.

“wrong answer,” he tuts, landing another harsh slap to your cunt, this time rubbing your clit immediately after. it was heavenly, the best spanking you’ve ever received that’s for damn sure. but you’re just so sensitive, you know it’s going to drive you insane.

“t-thank you daddy,” you fumble out, remembering what he wanted.

“what did you do to deserve this?”

you know, you know what you did.

“i-i teased you- fuck - i teased you in f-front of our friends,” you wail, pushing your hips up to get more friction against his fingers.

“you tortured me, in front of our friends,” he corrects you in a growl, slapping his hand down again, rubbing up and down with the pads of his fingers this time, “and now it’s your turn.”

“m’sorry i promise i won’t do it again,” you promise, reaching for his wrist before he’s batting your hand away.

“i don’t believe that.”

this continued on for a few minutes, the back and forth, him slapping at your pussy and you yelling out his name along with some choice words and apologies for being a bad girl. when he was satisfied with your pleas and whining, he’s stopping the madness at last, replacing his hand with his dick - tapping at your nub with the head of his cock, rubbing up and down - slipping just the tip in once again - he knows how crazy it drives you. with a gentle nudge, he’s diving into your wet hole - fucking you at a pace you’d never experienced before - drilling into you like a madman. His grin tells you to hold on tight. 

“now scream for me angel, i want everyone to know who’s making you feel this good.”

[iamnightduchess]

Hey Queen, so I was rewatching season 2 of AOT, and obviously, I saw the amazing Reiner and Bertholdt betrayal scene. I couldn’t help but imagine how that scene would play out in the Twilight Blue universe. May I ask for your headcanons of the Twilight Blue universe? I’m also really curious if Mikasa and Reiner would get back together since they teamed up in the manga to defeat Eren. Thanks!

Hello my dear. Thank you so much for the wonderful Ask! Here’s hoping that your weekend has started out great so far. The S2E6 scene is legendary on its own through the nonchalant way Reiner revealed his & Bertolt’s true identity to the Islanders. In the Twilight Blue Universe, it would be a lot more impactful on both Mikasa & Reiner emotionally. The following (super long) headcanon would be what I envision had happened & also, the possibility of them getting back together again in current canon timeline of the manga.

Read on more for your reading pleasure!

ReiKasa Fic AU Headcanon #4

Universe: Twilight Blue (Note: for this headcanon, the epilogue never took place & the only person who is aware of ReiKasa’s secret relationship would be Bertolt. There's some BeruKasa moments too.) Rhythmic muse included in the links below!

Pre-Reveal

* After the end of Twilight Blue, Reiner & Mikasa had been seeing each other in secrecy. Bertolt would frequently and naturally be the one who provides an excuse for Reiner’s occasional disappearances and he’d also be the one who actually help to switch Reiner’s kitchen or laundry duties so they would coincide with Mikasa’s turn making it easier for the couple to sneak in more alone time together.

* Their relationship continues even when they both enlisted with the Survey Corps.

* Mikasa & Reiner have several secret rendezvous spot(s) : i) the library, right at the secluded area of the fitness books section, ii) the nearby forest for an early morning run, iii) the kitchen storage room. When they've been reassigned to the SC's old headquarters, they frequently snuck into an old attic up in one of the older towers.

* Mikasa can be seen staying longer whenever Eren & Armin hung out with Reiner & Bertolt. It never escaped Armin's perceptive observation that Mikasa seemed to be more sociable only around boys like Reiner & Bertolt.

* During one of their secret trysts, Reiner promised to Mikasa that he'd bring her back to his home in the future to introduce her to his family. He even mentioned this in secret to Bertolt, which the latter protested immediately, arguing that Mikasa would have a horrible future in Marley if they ever take her back with the Founder. She would become their POW or worst, a breeder for the military due to her Ackerman blood. Bertolt reminded him that there are no possible future for them together.

* Since they've been keeping their relationship a secret, Reiner still is flirtatious around the other girls, much to Mikasa's envy. But she wasn't openly expressive of her feelings, therefore only Bertolt was able to tell when Mikasa is bothered by Reiner's behavior around the other female cadets.

* Bertolt would be the one to remind Reiner that he's being overboard but when his best friend apparently 'forgotten' that he's dating the top cadet, Bertolt eventually became the person that offers Mikasa the voice of reasoning.

* Reiner's apparent crush on Krista wasn't taken well by Mikasa. Reiner told her that it was all an act so no one would find out about their relationship. But it didn't hurt Mikasa less everytime he tries to flirt with the petite, beautiful girl right in front of her. It also didn't help that all the other cadets had been gossiping about how Reiner & Krista make a perfect couple, much to Ymir's annoyance as well.

* Bertolt began to spend more time with Mikasa alone, where he also shared with her of his secret feelings for Annie. They both bonded over having to keep their true feelings to themselves. At this point, Mikasa had already see Bertolt as a brother figure, just like Eren and Armin. The other cadets, however, began to suspect the nature of Bertolt & Mikasa’s relationship.

* Connie was the one who suggested that Bertolt & Mikasa had been 'tumbling in the hay' during dinner, when they were running late that one time from cleaning the stables. The way they both blushed & kept quiet only stirred up more rumors, much to Jean & Reiner's annoyance. That same night, after their evening roll call, inside that tiny attic space, Reiner, once again, reminded her on why there would be no other men that could make Mikasa feels the way he does. Part of him was being possessive, part of him was jealous.

* One incident where Mikasa fell off a tree and twisted her ankle to help a stray cat, actually almost caused a rift between Reiner & Bertolt. Reiner only then realized that he had hurt Mikasa's feelings the instant he felt envious when he saw Bertolt carrying the injured Mikasa in his arms. Bertolt asked him, "Why would you care about her?", causing Reiner to recognize that he hasn't been fair towards Mikasa ever since they began dating.

* Bertolt had to remind Reiner that they were not supposed to be attached to anyone on that island but they both know that it was already a line they had crossed.

Reveal & RtS “Say Something”

* The day before the emergency discreet meeting with the top SC officers had also been the last time Reiner & Mikasa had been intimate with each other.

* The night Hange revealed the SC's suspicions of the duo's true identity, Mikasa found it difficult to accept & she had secretly been hoping that their suspicions were untrue.

* When their squad arrives in time to rescue Reiner, Bertolt & the others in Utgard Castle, Mikasa had been worried about Reiner's injury but the way Reiner & Bertolt had been avoiding her gaze somehow confirms her worst fear.

* On top of Wall Rose, Mikasa had been dreading the moment that they're waiting to apprehend the two of them but Reiner's sudden mental breakdown pushed them all to the point of no return. Her hands had been shaking & she hesitated. Their objective was to apprehend them both for questioning, partly because she desperately wanted to talk to Reiner & to get his explanation.

* To say that Mikasa was disappointed that their suspicions were proven true would be an understatement. She was beyond devastated.

* Mikasa actually only wanted to hold Bertolt down so they could apprehend him. But Reiner pushed her off the wall, and this is because Reiner knew that Bertolt & him had to shift and he didn't want her to be caught in the transformation blast.

* The moment Reiner's psyche reinstates back to his Warrior alter, he had temporarily compartmentalized his existing feelings for Mikasa but his heart wouldn't allow him to do so.

* When the SC were chasing after Reiner, Bertolt & Eren, Reiner's heart ultimately broke the moment he heard Mikasa called him a plague of humanity in vain. His heart bled when he'd heard a Titan grabbed Mikasa & he'd heard her screaming in pain but he had to pretend that he felt nothing when it happened.

* Their relationship was as good as dead at that point and the end of the road for both of them, which was a premature, unspoken decision on both sides.

* The whole time when the SC were present during Hange’s introduction & briefing of the Thunder Spears, Mikasa’s brain had been thinking about Reiner the whole time & her feelings were hurt even worst than before.

* She knew they had no choice but to kill them & it didn’t make it even easier for her. It still hurts her to have to use that last Thunder Spear on him. She was still angry at him the whole time Hange was threatening him to explain about the place he came from, their mission & that mysterious letter for Historia. Never she’d expected that it would be the last time she’d ever see his face.

Post-Reveal  “It’s Not Goodbye”

* During her imprisonment for insubordination, Mikasa became depressed not only for the fact she now knew that both Eren & Armin have limited years left of living due to the Curse of Ymir, but it was also because of her guilt towards having to watch Bertolt being eaten alive by Armin’s raw titan form and also for a fact that Reiner would also be dying before Eren does.

* When Eren & Armin went to Reiner & Bertolt’s old room to clear their remaining possessions, it was Armin who told Mikasa that he’d kept them in the old attic instead of throwing them away. Mikasa kept Reiner’s old shirt that still has his scent on it from the storage & actually hid it under her pillow. It helped her through her difficult nights.

Time-Skip (Current Canon Timeline) “Love Story”  | “Tainted”

* Within that four years, they both had never stopped thinking about the other. It hurts Reiner so badly that he couldn’t allow himself to reminisce all of the beautiful moments he had with Mikasa and could only subconsciously thought of the last moment he’d ever saw her face; her sending an explosive projectile down his Titan’s throat.

* Mikasa had not talked to anyone about Reiner or even once mention his name within that four years. No one knew why she would seclude herself in the attic of one of the headquarters towers every other Saturday.

* Only Sasha knew of Mikasa’s secret relationship years later by accident as during one night, she had overheard Mikasa tossed and turned around in her sleep, calling out for Reiner’s name, her asking why and how could you in her sleep. Mikasa would later wakes up from her nightmare & hides herself in their shared bathroom, crying in the shower.

* The first time she sees Reiner’s Armored Titan again in Liberio, she couldn’t hide the disappointment on her face. She couldn’t even look at Reiner’s direction at all & she realizes that seeing him again still hurts her.

* She was genuinely concerned of Reiner’s safety after the Rumbling was initiated by Eren. Later on, when they were reunited through the Marley-Paradis alliance, all those old memories came flooding back. They both had grown physically & mentally older but the love, it has always been there. The moment she saw his sleeping figure, by gods, she had never known how much she’s been missing him.

* It pained her so much when she saw him being pummeled by Jean because of Marco’s death. Not even once he retaliated or defended himself. She’d never stopped worrying for him the moment he saw him immobilized inside his Titan form at the docks in their confrontation with the Jeagerists. Yet, not even once had she spoken to him directly ever since they were reunited.

* The first time they’ve ever spoken to each other was on the Hizuru steamer en route to Odiha. While Connie was busy tending to the injured Armin in the Medical Bay inside the ship, she helped clean Annie & Reiner’s wounds. “I miss you so damn much.” Were the first words he’d ever spoken to her after four and a half years. She pretended that she didn’t hear him at all.

* She avoided him on the steamer and even when they’re all gathered in the communal area to strategize, she’d spoken to everyone directly, even Annie & Pieck except him. Reiner also saw her observing the conversation Armin was having with Annie on the decks from afar and pulled her into one of secluded hallways to talk & to break the cold silence between them.

* She pushed him away and locked herself inside one of the unoccupied rooms as Reiner knocked on the door from the other side, kneeling and begging for her forgiveness, begging her not to shut him out. Mikasa hated herself even more with every tears that she had shed for both Eren and Reiner.

* Later that night, once they’ve docked in Odiha, Reiner knocked on her door once again to tell her that if tonight is the last night he’d have alive, he just wanted to apologize to her & he just didn’t want to have anymore regrets. 

* He begged and he pleaded, “I just wanted to be able to look at you in your eyes and tell you how very sorry I am for all the hurt I’ve caused you and there hasn’t been a day that went by without you on my mind. A part of me died a little bit each day since the day I left Paradis.”

* It took several swings of her fist against his chest, a slap on his cheek and a whispered, “I hate you” from her lips before it met his in a reawakened hunger. Old feelings and sparks reignited between the two former lovers. Inside a tiny bunker room on the Hizuru steam ship, two separated hearts reunited as one once again, so as their bodies.

* Now that Marley is in ruins & her mother is most probably dead, Reiner believes that he no longer has a home to return to. Mikasa disagrees & argues that he still has Gabi and he’d always have a home in her heart. Reiner realizes that if he ever survives their last stand against the Founder in Fort Salta the next day, he’d only wanted to spend the remaining time that he’d still had left alive with Mikasa, raising Gabi & Falco together.

* Right before they both dropped off from the plane to take down Eren’s Founding Titan, Reiner made one last promise to her: he’ll never leave her again & they will both return home together.

---------

I hope you’ve enjoyed the above & thanks again for sending in this fun Ask, @xrocketmanx! Take care & stay safe.

xoxo,

NightD

[gothic-safari-clown]

The Mind’s Power Over the Body

Part 16: Round Two?

Story summary: They only ever had each other. It had been that way since high school, ever since Elianna transferred to dreary Arlen and took Jonathan under her wing. They go separate ways for college, and when they're reunited at Arkham Asylum professionally, Elianna comes to find that they've both changed during their time separated. Can she look past the promise of danger and stay by Jonathan's side as they slide further and further into the darkness while she grapples to come to terms with the truth about herself? Can she accept what needs to be done in order to hold onto the only person who holds any meaning in her life? This is a very self-indulgent AU that draws from several different canons of the DCU and ignoring others, starting in the Batman Begins Nolanverse. This will follow the plot of the movie, although the timeline has been very slightly tweaked.

Part One / Part Two / Part Three / Part Four / Part Five / Part Six / Part Seven / Part Eight / Part Nine / Part Ten / Part Eleven / Part Twelve / Part Thirteen / Part Fourteen / Part Fifteen 

Word count: 1559

El had been right about her mysterious savior in that his interference grew to be something that could be quite a nuisance to them. It wasn't long after Jonathan's meeting with Falcone that he had returned with a new, tricked out getup. Rumors around town had confirmed that it was the same man and seemed to solidify the vigilante theory.

Gadgets or not, the pair had yet to see the effects of the toxin on the caped crusader. Jonathan had come home that night composed as always, but she had recognized the troubled look in his eyes. Between that and the attack on Falcone, it seemed that whoever was having little trouble sniffing out their plot.

"What's the bad news?" She sighed, putting down the book she had been reading. Jonathan just shook his head in response, loosening his tie.

"The bad news-" he sighed, rubbing his hand down his face, "is that Rachel Dawes is still alive, and rumors are that she has some leverage over the judge that Falcone paid off for the organization."

"Oh, shit," El put her forehead in her palm. After all of the traction that the so-called 'Batman' had gained so quickly, the last thing she had expected was to hear that the meddling DA was still around. "Well, wait, the bad news? Does that mean there's good news too?" She lifted her head again, relieved to see him nod.

"That microwave emitter that I told you about, for the final stage, it came in, it's all ready to go. If-" he cut off the look of excitement on El's face, "we can prevent the DA's office from throwing another wrench in."

"Jonathan, don't worry about that." She rolled her eyes and stood from the couch. "They have leverage on the DA, not Falcone's staff at the shipyard, and before they can build a case, they need to have proof that we even have it."

"If they get a warrant-"

"Then the boys at the docks will take care of it, that's what I'm trying to say. Now, will you relax? Everything is going to be fine. We have the machine, and we have more than enough of the toxin."

Jonathan was still leaning back slightly against the table, pinching the bridge of his nose. Elianna sighed, silently cursing her friend's perfectionist nature, and moved his hand away from his face and replaced it with her own hands on either cheek.

"Can you just once relax and appreciate your own work? Do you need a cigarette?"

"No, I don't need a cigarette; they're disgusting. I need to find a way to foolproof this damn thing."

"It is disgusting, it's absolutely revolting, but I think it'll bring you into the present and give you at least a couple minutes to step away from being you." She patted his cheek and nudged him toward the fire escape window.

"From being me?"

"Yeah. Let's not be you right now. Let's be me instead, and be proud of your work." Jonathan rolled his eyes but went along with her.

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to stop thinking for a minute.

You'll listen to her and not me? I'm very hurt, Jonny. You don't share a body with her.

Standing outside smoking, leaning against the rail, the pair stared out at the city before them.

"Look at that. It's disgusting. You should have come to California with me when you had the chance." Elianna teased and elbowed Jonathan lightly. He responded by exhaling slowly and giving a look that said 'maybe.' "Okay, look; you're still not being me, you're not here. Look out there," she pointed with her cigarette. "Gotham is falling apart, and if I remember correctly, it has been for decades. What you are doing with this project will end all of that once and for all. This city is a stain, and you're cleaning it out, once and for all."

A long pause hung between them as Jonathan let his friend's words sink in. She was right, and for the first time since the beginning of the whole plot, he felt a sense of pride for his contribution. Ultimately, this was for the greater good, and he would be the one to pull the trigger on it.

Pride was quickly replaced with a relaxed contentedness, and Jonathan took another drag, almost enjoying the taste.

"Actually," he began, "I think now we are cleaning it out. Give yourself some credit." He turned El's little speech back on her and watched as she floundered.

"Well, I—I haven't really done anything, I'm just sort of here, and honestly, I should have gone back to my apartment ages ago-"

"There isn't really any point now; there are only two weeks before we start." El nodded and returned her gaze to the skyline.

"I'm sorry for being in your space for so long. I really didn't mean to be here still." She turned her head to look at Jonathan.

"I already told you, I like having you around." El's eyes widened at the genuine admission. "Besides, if someone were to come after you, I'd rather you not be alone. I think we both know how that usually ends up by now." He finished with a grim smile, and the redhead nodded in agreement. Everything seemed to come back to the late Granny Keeny.

Remembering the painful and dangerous situation in which her friend was brought up made her sad, and she moved closer to rest her head on his shoulder. "I'm just glad I could help. I know I give you a hard time, but I love you very much." El told him matter-of-factly, planted a kiss on his arm before returning her head to his shoulder, and took a drag off the stick between her fingers.

Jonathan found himself glad that she couldn't see his face, as her words caused his eyes to shut of their own accord. Even Scarecrow's filthy encouragements were drowned out as he privately reveled in El's affection. The insecure teenager still inside of him reminded him that whatever she said was meant platonically, but he allowed himself a quiet moment to pretend.

Connecting with people had never been his strong suit, and that fact had continued to hold into adulthood. But being around Elianna every day again for the first time in years served to remind him of the benefits of personal relationships. Even so, it frustrated him to no end that he had yet to figure out whether his attraction to his friend was based on the comfort of her presence or something else.

Even thinking about it made him tired. Slowly, almost tentatively, his head rested on hers. In response, her free arm wrapped around his to keep him there.

Unbeknownst to Jonathan, Elianna was facing a similar dilemma. It was a debate she had been having with herself since she had moved to Gotham, and as much as she wanted to convince herself finally to take the chance, now was most certainly not the time. Besides...

"It's Saturday."

"Yes, it is."

"You said that we were going to dose me again; we were supposed to do that last night."

The moment broke, and Jonathan let out a long-suffering sigh. "Alright, if you're so eager," he extinguished his half-smoked cigarette and tossed it down onto the ground below with El following suit.

Once back inside, the pair both went automatically to prepare for the ordeal. As Elianna settled onto the bed, Jonathan spoke again.

"You know you don't have to do this again. We were already going to get you a gas mask like the one I have."

"I know." She replied simply, and with a Look, Jonathan began fastening the restraints.

"May I ask why you want to do this so badly?" There was a silence as the redhead pondered her answer.

While some of her motivation came from the perspective of 'just in case of an accident,' she was reluctant to admit the real reason: that once the toxin wore off, the flooding of endorphins left her exhilarated and wanting more. That the rush of surviving something traumatic and harrowing, even just an assault on her psyche, left her feeling powerful, if somewhat exhausted.

Despite her reluctance, Jonathan seemed to know the answer already.

"The thrill of making it through?" El couldn't help the short laugh that escaped.

"I guess that sounds kinda crazy." Jonathan shook his head.

"Not at all. I went through the same thing." He assured as he finished fastening all of the restraints and retrieved the old belt from the dresser where it had been left. "Just remember," he continued as he placed it between her teeth, "that I am going to be here the entire time, alright?" Before he could think about the action, he laid his hand against her cheek comfortingly. Reading her expression, he nodded, "I promise."

El nodded and took a deep breath through her nose to prepare herself, staring at the ceiling before nodding firmly. With that, Jonathan wiped the injection site clean with an alcohol swab and carefully stuck the prepared needle into her vein, and pushed in the plunger.

[estrxlar]

The Ghost Of You

12 - Coincidence

This chapters songs:

Beach Bummer; No Vacation

Goodie Bag; Still Woozy

Sports; Beach Bunny

- Y. L. Perspective

I wasn't sure what to think when I had read the message aloud. "I want to talk." What could that possibly mean?

"Y/n, I'm sure you're just being dramatic. Maybe he just wangs to check up on how you've been doing, " Toruku suggests, sipping from his box of apple juice. The two of us sat against the brick wall on the outside of the cafeteria, discussing my issue. Giki and Hikishi couldn't join us for lunch because of school work that they had to finish up, and Suga had to meet his friends.

Ever since the party, the only thing that stuck to my mind was my situation with Koushi. But other than that, I had forgotten about certain things that happened. As an example, bumping into Oikawa. And as crazy as it was, the moment completely left my mind for a good five days. Until I got a message from him, saying, "I want to talk."

Oikawa, Toruku, Iwaizumi, and I have known each other ever since the beginning of junior high. The only reason we had separated was because of Moku's tragic death, and our schools. Toruku and I had decided to stick together and go to Karasuno, while Oikawa and Iwa felt their volleyball was more important than staying friends. But honestly, it wasn't that big of a deal. The older we grew, then we realized that we wouldn't stick with our middle school friends.

But what Oikawa had caused between the four of us is what made things awkward.

Around the summer of my first year of high school, we all subtly kept in touch with each other. But then after he had thrown a party around July a fight had broken out between him and Toruku because of me.

Oikawa was telling others cruel things in a group of people that were discussing school, lying about how I acted around him. That I had messed around with him, or how I was jealous of Moku for being with Toruku and took it out on Oikawa. But truth was that Oikawa was the one who liked me, and I never paid too much attention to him because of how guilty I felt for liking my best friend's boyfriend.

Iwaizumi, Oikawa, Toruku, and I all knew what Toru said were false claims that he only told for attention from other girls that he would talk to. Oikawa let his popularity get ahead of him, causing a ruckus to occur that day. The further he would go with these stories, the angrier Toruku and I had grown. Eventually, his mouth ran far enough to drive Toruku to punch him more than I had expected. Oikawa was all bark and no bite, therefore, he didn't fight back. That night is when Toruku and I had realized that we needed to move in from our past and find lives of our own. Ones that wouldn't have to ever run into the two obnoxious duo Oikawa and Iwaizumi.

So you could imagine my anger when seeing him at a party that didn't involve him.

"Uhm.." Toruku takes a bite out of his egg sandwich, munching while talking. "Just text him back! Say 'about what?' I bet that would get you answers."

I groan at his stupidity. Today wasn't the best day to have lunch with Toruku, but who else could relate to me as much as him? So, I do as I am suggested, texting back a simple reply and hoping it would lead me to the best possible outcome.

—

Oikawa

I want to talk

About what?

...

—

"Oh my god, he's typing," I say quickly, dropping any items in my hand to hold the phone in front of Toruku and me. He finishes his egg sandwich and crumbles the wrapper to throw into a bin not too far away from where we sat before crossing his arms in concentration.

It wasn't that I was excited to talk to Oikawa. I was nervous as to what he wanted to discuss with me. Other than school, there wasn't much to talk about with him. All I knew was that he turned into a jackass with an ego.

'What does he even wanna say?'

When my phone vibrated in my hands, I had thought my questions were answered. But only a simple reply was given to me.

—

Oikawa

I want to talk

About what?

I just want to see how you've been doing. How about lunch on Saturday?

—

Toruku frowns at the message. "Why would he want to have lunch after what happened?" He asks me. "Say you're busy." A protective tone overtakes him.

"Ok, ok."

—

Oikawa

I want to talk

About what?

I just want to see how you've been doing. How about lunch on Saturday?

I have a tight schedule, so I don't think I'm free that day.

Hmm

Sunday?

What would we talk about, Toru?

Honestly

I just wanted to see you again

You know, talk?

Mhm

But why? Soon it won't matter

Cause after I saw you on Saturday I realized I had some things to say

Please?

Okay

We'll figure something out

—

"Do you think he still likes you?" Toruku pops in.

"No, I don't think so. But I also haven't been able to see his development, so I wouldn't know," I reply to him. I could either ruin or glorify my relationship with him. That was a bet I wasn't sure I wanted to take. And not only that, but he also had beef with Toruku. Why didn't he ask him to lunch as well? Was it because he didn't run into him during the party?

Now I had yet again another thing to worry about. Right now, my current concern was my first volleyball practice this afternoon. Kiyoko had informed me that this weekend they were to have a practice game with one of the competitive teams. I wasn't sure if I would enjoy it or not, but I mine as well have given it a shot.

To be honest, I was a little bit excited. Not only would I be able to see Suga more than in the afternoon, but I could get to know the underclassman more. That was if they even liked me.

"Whatever. I don't need to be worrying about this right now," I tell Toruku as I get up from the wall to throw my trash away. He nods, tossing his trash in the basket as well, before picking up my bag and bento, handing it to me. "Thanks for having lunch with me."

"It's no issue. Just tell me how things go with texting Oikawa and have fun at practice."

"Sure thing."

-

I waited at the front of her classroom. By her, I mean the beauty herself: Kiyoko. She told me earlier that she would run through the rooms the volleyball club uses so that I could get familiar with where I'd be going every day I attended practice. I was in good hands when it came to Kiyoko, one of my very close friends.

Finally, her classroom door opens, followed by the many students held inside to flood the hallways, including Kiyoko. "Hey there!" She throws a hand over my shoulder as we begin walking to the exit of the hall. "You excited?"

"I guess. I'm more nervous than excited," I reply.

"Don't be. The boys are very sweet. If you'd like, I can try giving you a summary of what to expect!" She exclaims, her excitement practically glowing off of her skin.

Once I nod, Kiyoko begins her full explanation of the players. "Well, we have the three third years. Me, Sugawara, and Daichi! And you already know about us. And there are only four second years. There's Tanaka, Ennoshita, Kinoshita, and Narita. Tanaka is a loud person, but he's super hard working and nice to me, so I guess he's okay. As for Ennoshita, he doesn't talk very much, but I wouldn't be rough with him. He seems like the insecure type. And Narita and Kenoshita are like him, except a little more wild! They usually stay in the back of the crowd, though. Then there are the first years— man are they talented. We have this amazing pair of first years, Kageyama and Hinata. Hinata is so good at jumping, probably the best I've ever seen, and a very rowdy boy. Kageyama is usually a prick to everybody, but he's learning to be a team player. Then there is Tsukishima and Yamaguchi. They're pretty simple to predict. Tsuki just bosses around Yamaguchi all the time and they both talk crap about everybody, but they're good friends and good players."

I can't help but widen my eyes at how fast Kiyoko had explained the players. It was as if she had a lite notebook in the back of her mind where she stored every detail about them, knowing every word she wrote like the back of her hand. "...wow, so there's some personality in the team! That's good to hear," I say, taking a deep breath before we both leave the school building and make our way behind it. "I think I know about Kageyama, though. I went to middle school with him and my old friends that were on the team with him weren't very fond of him— but that's all I know. Sugawara just tells me that he's a very talented person, which doesn't say much about his persona."

"Oh yeah! How're things with Sugawara going?" Kiyoko has no hesitation to jump towards the subject. I couldn't blame her, though. It had been a while since we had a girl-on-girl chat.

Embarrassed, I chuckle, staring at the ground as we discuss. "Nothing much. I mean— he did ask me to be his girlfriend, and we made out a couple of times, but that's it!" I act as if the actions weren't such a huge thing.

Kiyoko gasped. "Y/n! You didn't tell me that you were so close to him, I would have teased you way more than I already do! You kissed him?! How many times? When—where?!"

"Shimizu, stop talking so loud!" I exclaimed, raising my brows as the girl pipes down. Kiyoko wasn't ever the type to get so rowdy about things, that is if it didn't have to do with romance. As for that, she was a downer. And if her friend was involved with it then she wouldn't stop with the blabber. "Anyway, after the party, we both spent the night in his car. We didn't do anything but make out. Still, it was so nice," I whine. "He was so gentle and confident at the same time, and I'd never had somebody want to kiss me so badly— y'know? After that, he took me home, and we both slept in my bed for a couple of hours. Once I woke up, he wasn't anywhere to be found. Only my cat and a letter were left on the pillow next to me."

"A letter?" She questions.

"Yeah, explaining his feelings—his feelings,

Shimizu! Isn't that so sweet?! He told me that he was in love with me and never felt so passionate about anybody the way he does with me. But the thing is, I'm not even sure I wanna be in a relationship. And it's hurting both of us. I think I'm just so confused about everything that I can't even make up a decision."

"Hm, that's understandable. It's a big surprise two of my friends are getting together without telling me! Especially since they're so in love with each other. But now you're saying you don't know what to say?" Kiyoko hums. "Well, from the way you talk about him, are you sure that you're not just scared? You seem like you're head over heels, Y/n. What's stopping you?"

Suddenly, a tall shadow stops us in our tracks, interrupting our conversation. "Yeah, what's stopping you?!" A deep voice says as Kiyoko nudges him.

"Daichi, you don't even know what we're talking about!" She says. It was no other than Sawamura, acting silly again.

He wore a black jumpsuit that I assumed was his volleyball uniform and white tennis shoes, topped off with his grin. "Hey, Y/n! You excited for practice?" He asks in enthusiasm, crossing his arms. If I was being honest, Daichi always scared me when confronting me, but I knew he had my back. Therefore, the goosebumps that crawled up my spine had disappeared once I settled into his smile.

"I mean... I'm a bit nervous. But yeah, I'm excited."

Daichi claps his large hands, then points towards a grey building that was only a few meters away from where we stood under the school roof. "Great! Kiyoko can lead you to the locker rooms and the team will meet you in the gym!"

I look to Kiyoko, who's nodding. "Sure thing. Let's go, Y/n." Her hand lightly pushes me towards the direction of the changing rooms.

Once we arrived at a certain locker room, Kiyoko showed me around the place. There were sixteen lockers on each side of the wall and two benches in the middle. Lots of different sports instruments were piled up in a corner, while a few bags were tossed in another. Overall, it seemed like a regular changing room.

"Here, you can use this locker here. No one ever does." Kiyoko points to an empty silver cubby. The others that surrounded it had posters and locker decor on them, telling me they were already claimed by other girls.

I open the locker, placing a few of my things in it like my bag, school vest and tie, and my shoes. After, I turn to Kiyoko, who's standing right behind me with a black bag in her hands. "Here, this is your new uniform. The team will take you more seriously if you have it on."

Taking the baggy, I pull open the zipper, revealing folded clothing inside. It was the same that Daichi had on earlier, except it didn't come with shorts and tennis shoes. Kiyoko told me that I would only need to bring some sport shoes and a white tee to wear under my sweater. "Thanks! Are you gonna be wearing one too?"

"Not today. My uniform is dirty, so I'll be using one from him. Don't worry, once the team is used to you, you'll be able to bend the rules a bit as I do. They don't care very much." She says as she makes her way towards her locker, pulling out a light lavender jumpsuit.

'Crap, does this mean I'm going to have to undress in front of other girls? That's gonna be awkward.' I tell myself, as I hid behind the door of my locker to pull down my skirt and quickly put on the black pants. I exchange my button-up for a comfortable white tee and black sweater, before taking off a few accessories that I had on and slip them into a pocket of my bag. After, I sat on the bench to trade my black long socks for some normal ones and tie on my shoes.

"Ready?" Kiyoko turns to me, fully dressed in her uniform.

"You bet."

-

I hadn't realized how awkward interrupting a practice was until the deed was done. It was sickening, embarrassing, and terrifying.

"Hi everybody," Kiyoko says in a soft tone, setting our bags down near the door while I avoided eye contact with anybody. That didn't help the fact that every one of the players was staring at us, sitting in a circle on the ground.

A loud, raspy voice echoed through the gym, interrupting the bitter silence that ate me up. "Hi, Kiyoko! How was your day today?" I glance up at the person who jogged towards us.  He had a huge smile and short buzz cut, already telling me that he was a rowdy one. "And as for you, welcome! You must be the new manager! I'm Ryonosuke Tanaka, one of the best players on this team!" He holds out a hand for me to shake.

'So this must be the second year Kiyoko told me about. Great, I like him already.' I think, bowing before shaking his hand. "I'm Y/n L/n, nice to meet you."

"Tanaka! Show some respect for your upperclassman, will you!" Daichi comments, coming up from behind him. "I'm sorry about him. He's a wild one."

"Oh, that's alright."

When Daichi realizes I'm comfortable enough to glance at the teammates, he quickly moves out of the way. "Oh—let me introduce you properly. Everybody, this is our new manager that Takeda Sensei told us about: Y/n! She's a third-year and is here to help out Kiyoko. She's friends with us third years too, so no funny business!" He looks towards Tanaka. "That means you, Tanaka!"

He yells out, "I—I was just being friendly!"

Daichi simply playfully rolls his eyes. "Why don't you first years come to introduce yourselves, hm?" He suggests as a few boys shuffle through the small crowd to get a better view of me.

"Hey! It's good to see you again, L/n! I'm Shoyo Hinata." He bows. I recognized him immediately when he approached me. The player was short for somebody on a volleyball team and had bright ginger hair that was rough and fluffy, and he practically radiated energy when I was near him. "I hope you have a great time on the team!"

After giving him a brief smile, I shift my eyes towards a pair of first-years that seemed suspicious of my presence in the club. But one of them stepped up to shake my hand and grin. He had brown yet green-tinted hair that appeared soft, and many freckles on his face. "Hi, I'm Tadashi Yamaguchi. A pleasure to meet you!" He cautiously nudges the tall boy next to him.

He rolls his eyes at the slightest, tossing the volleyball in his hands to the ground. "Hi, I'm Tsukishima." He says in a proud tone, bowing.

Then, I fixate my eyes on the boy who stood behind Hinata, staring intently at me. Once he notices that I had caught him, he began stuttering. "I—Uh...I'm Kageyama! Tobio Kageyama." The ravenette puffs up his chest, bowing towards me.

"Ah, yes! I know about you. Did you happen to go to Kitagawa Daiichi during middle school?" I ask, tilting my head to take a mental picture of him.

"Uh..yes. How did you know?"

"I used to hang around the volleyball club a lot and knew a bit about you. But I never would have thought you would go here!" I quickly realize how rude my response appeared. "Oh, crap! I didn't mean it like that."

He shakes his head violently, shutting down my apology. "It's no issue, Y/n! It's great that you know me— I mean— thank you for recognizing me," he says loudly, bowing once more. It became obvious that Kags was a bit nervous to meet me, but it wasn't anything threatening. His bright pink cheeks were more warming than scary.

"Well, Kageyama, it's great to see you again," I giggle. Then, three boys are seen in the corner of my eye, seeming eager to say their hellos. Taking initiative, I greet them. "Uh, hi guys."

"Hey!" They say, maneuvering towards me. The black-haired one shakes my hand first, squeezing it gently. "I'm Ennoshita. Pleased to meet you." Then comes the other two: one with a buzz cut, and the other with dirty blonde hair. "I—I'm Kenoshita! And this is Narita!" He points to the buzz cut boy. "We're all second years, by the way!"

Surprised by so many greetings, I can't help but hold my hands out in front of my face. "Oh— okay! Nice to meet you, too."

Somebody abruptly suggests, "Why don't you guys give her some space?" Knowing the voice too well to forget it, I grew excited. Sugawara had arrived, finally. I was looking forward to seeing him more than anybody else. "Hey, Y/n. Glad to have you," He says, secretly winking at me.

"Thank you."

-

"Let's talk positions for the practice game," Daichi commands, lifting a dry erase board to face everybody."Here's the plan I came up with."

The club was sat in a big circle on the court facing Daichi and Takeda. I accompanied them as well, pretending I knew what they were talking about.

"I'd like to have you two working as a pair." Daichi points to Kageyama and Hinata, who gave each other low growls. "And since Tsukishima is our tallest player, I think that would give us a benefit against Seijoh."

'Seijoh? Isn't that short for Aoba Johsai?' I think, raising my hand slightly. "Uh, so you guys are playing against Seijoh?"

Daichi nods. "Yes, Aoba Johsai. We have a practice game with them this week. They're a very strong team, so we need to be in our top game. Are you gonna be joining us..or?"

"Yeah, I will. I'm asking because I know a bit about the players on that team. If you'd like, I can give you guys some advice on their style."

"Wait! Why is Hinata in the one position that needs a tall guy?" Tanaka blurts, as he points towards Shoyos name that was written on the board. It stood in front of the net doodle, telling us he'd be playing as a blocker.

Hinata takes notice of this and grows annoyed. "You're saying Tsukishima and I are playing middle blockers?!" It seemed that he wasn't very fond of Tsuki.

"Timeout!" Takeda strikes the air with his hands, before reaching to his side to unfold a small handy book. "I think I need an overview of the positions.. let's start with the setter. That's the basic control tower— the ones who set people up for attacks. Then there are the wing spikers. They're the rounder that sort of.. maintains the balance between offense and defense. And middle blockers block the other teams' attacks and score points using quick attacks. They also act as a decoy to lead away from the opponent blockers! Is that right?" He asks, looking up to the team captain for reassurance.

He nods his head, putting his palms together. "There is a position that specializes in defense, but we don't need to worry about that right now. So far, that's the positions!"

"Well, Hinata should be the 'number one decoy'!" Kageyama quickly rises, looking towards the redhead. I look towards Kiyoko who is just as confused as me about what he blabbered. "Why don't we use you as a distraction to get points? We'll be using quick attacks, that way the other spikers can do some damage! You'll take down guys like Tsukishima and take them right down the garden path like the idiots they are." Kageyama spoke in a determined manner.

Yamaguchi defended the boy, saying, "Hey! Don't imply Tsuki's an idiot!" But is quickly shut down by Tsukishima, being told to shut up. "Oh.. sorry."

'These first years sure are interesting..and rude, if I'm being honest. Why is it that they're so bossy and demanding?' I say to myself, bringing my knees up and resting my head on them. Although we hadn't done anything physical, I was beginning to grow tired.

"Hinata, when we play, you better be on your best level! If you mess up even one bit, all of our attacks are gonna start to fall apart, got it?" Kageyama strikes Hinata, making him feel frightened and cornered.

"Come on, Kageyama. Hinata is already under a lot of pressure, why say things that make him feel bad?" I whisper to him, as he began to feel concerned for Shoyo.

Tanaka pats Hinatas back, attempting to calm him. "Yeah but- blocking is the most important thing here! No matter how high he can jump, he's still a shorty pants."

What he had told everybody started a riot between the players. Each of them argued about whether or not Hinata should be one of the middle blockers. As for the third years, we rubbed our foreheads in frustration. But it wasn't as if I could expect anything different from these boys.

"Don't you worry, Hinata. As long as you do your best, the team will be proud-"

"R-right! I promise I won't mess up!" Hinata perks up while his face turned a crimson color out of stress. "I'll block as much as you want me to and be the best decoy! I'll serve, I'll do attacks, I'll block! I'll do whatever you say, captain!"

Because of how anxious he grew, he dropped onto the gym floor not long after his rant, breathing heavily. Hinata had made it clear to me that volleyball was a very serious thing for him, and other players' opinions on him meant almost everything. But thank goodness, our third years reassured him that he would be just fine for the practice game.

From how much I'd seen, I thought that the club wasn't too much of an issue to attend to. That was if I wasn't helping first years get back up onto their feet after short-circuiting. Kiyoko had even told me that I did a great job on my first day at practice. So I was sure that I'd be a benefit to the team.

Now, my biggest concern was seeing Oikawa.

-

Comments and votes are super appreciated! Pls give me recognition for my chapters, I work so so so hard.

- sugawaras beauty mark☆

[omotextual]

Omovember Day 4

Fandom: Welcome to Night Vale

Prompt: During a Performance or Presentation

Because clearly this fandom needs more of Cecil desperate on the air. 😀

Apologies if this one is a little rough; I initially wrote it as more of an intentional holding thing, but that scenario already existed, so it was converted to a true accident after the fact.

There are many things Cecil generally does shortly before beginning his broadcast. Straightening up the studio, rechecking his notes, leaving flowers on the interns' graves...

They all go out the window in the event of handsome scientists bearing coffee.

Cecil had been thrilled to see Carlos, cooing over his thoughtfulness as he accepted the proffered spidermilk latte, and eagerly agreeing when his boyfriend suggested sticking around for the broadcast. Carlos had elected to stay in the monitoring booth, not wanting to be a distraction, and Cecil had perhaps put off heading into the recording booth until the last possible moment in the interest of spending more time with him. His notes were ready to go, he'd reasoned, it would be fine.

As he'd settled into the cool, quiet studio, though, he'd begun to realize there was one part of his pre-show routine he definitely should not have skipped, a building tension in his abdomen reminding him of just how much coffee he had drunk in the past couple hours. It was one vague thought among many, though, and anyway, he didn't have time to get to the men's room and back.

He's sort of regretting that now. The urge had increased sharply as he'd begun the show, and now...

It's barely five minutes into the broadcast, and Cecil needs to go.

Crossing his legs beneath the desk, he resigns himself to a very uncomfortable recording experience. It's entirely his own fault, he reminds himself... and he's dealt with worse, after all. He's seen all manner of horrors during the course of his show, and he is a Radio Professional, and --

And he's stuck, unable to leave the recording booth, no matter how much he's dying to pee.

The urge isn't too difficult to ignore, at least at first. He's certainly aware of it, would gladly take the first opportunity to use the bathroom, but -- that opportunity isn't coming anytime soon. He's pretty sure that's the only reason it feels so urgent, anyway -- his mind is playing tricks on him simply because he knows he can't leave the studio. He can't possibly be this desperate, this fast.

He continues with the show, smiling at Carlos through the glass even as he fidgets, resisting the impulse to squirm in his seat. He's not there yet, it's not that bad yet.

Because if it is, he's in real trouble.

No, he's fine. He can totally wait. It's just...unpleasant, is all. He's just making it worse by thinking about it, his body tensing up as he worries at the building pressure, the constant attention making it seem more intense than it is.

One foot taps restlessly, impatiently, as he reads out the news. The urge to go is a constant pressure in his abdomen, driving him to distraction. He continues to ignore it, telling himself sternly that he has to wait until the end of the show, and yes, he badly wants to go but he can't, so there's no use thinking about it.

Cecil tries to just focus on doing his job, but he's beginning to have trouble keeping still. His hands rove restlessly over the desk, shuffling and reshuffling his notes, moving constantly, aimlessly, needing to do something, anything to help himself hold on. He forces himself still, toes twitching and curling in his shoes with the effort, but seemingly seconds later he's shifting and squirming again.

He can do this. Squeezing his thighs together, he places his hands flat on the desk, determined to leave them there. He can feel his legs vibrating slightly with the tension, but it's fine. He's fine, it's--

His fingers are tapping rapidly along the edge of the desk. He stills his hands, and his back arches, body trying to find a way to ease the growing pressure.

All right, this might be a real problem.

Still, there's nothing he can do. The thought is rapidly going from a simple statement of fact to a helpless complaint inside his head. If he weren't on the air, he's pretty sure that he would be moaning and whimpering out loud by now. Of course, if he weren't on the air he would simply go into the bathroom and piss, oh sweet void he needs to piss...

On the other side of the glass Carlos is watching him intently, looking as though he's beginning to work out what's going on, probably convincing himself that he's imagining things. Cecil hopes so, anyway, cringing at the thought of Carlos knowing how badly he needs to pee. He can just imagine the thoughts going through his boyfriend's mind: if he needed to go that badly, why didn't he just go beforehand?

Oh, why hadn't he?

Having to sit there and calmly read the news when he wants to squirm and writhe and moan is torture. He needs every ounce of willpower to hold back the urge, but it takes every ounce not to gasp and whimper into the mic. Fuck, he needs to pee, he needs to, and he's trying as hard as he can to focus on the show -- he no longer has any hope of ignoring the urge, but he's terrified that if he so much as thinks about how badly he needs to go, the words will come spilling out of his mouth.

He wants to, wants to whine and babble about how much he needs to pee. Saying it wouldn't help anything, but it's just so hard not to.

He realizes he's clutching himself, grasping his cock tightly beneath the desk, shifting in his seat, small but inexorable movements of his hips. Fuck, he needs to go so badly and he can't, he can't do anything but sit there and hold back the desperate need, try to pretend that he isn't absolutely dying to piss.

His free hand goes to his thigh, pinching and plucking at the leg of his trousers and then pinching the skin below. He tries to focus on that small pain, tries to take his mind off his desperate need.

It's no use. The urge is maddening, overwhelming, unbearable...and somehow still rising.

Carlos has definitely noticed his predicament by now. There's no hope of subtlety anymore -- he can only hope the mic isn't picking up the relentless shifting of his body. He tries to focus on that, on not humiliating himself in front of his boyfriend.

In front of everyone, really. He's trying so hard to keep it together, but he feels the entire town must know by now, he needs to go so badly it's all but radiating off him, oh, he needs to go, he needs to --

Each moment seems to last an eternity, but when he checks, only a few minutes have gone by. The need is building and building with no relief in sight, and oh, he's not going to make it. It's not even halfway through and he's moments away from soaking his trousers. The realization hits with sudden clarity, sudden, awful certainty. He's going to piss himself, right here, in the booth. On the air.

Fuck, he has to let it out now -- before his body makes the choice for him. He wants to wail with embarrassment, but the thought brings an odd sort of relief as well: he's so full, the urge to piss is agony, and oh, he doesn't want to wait anymore. He can't wait anymore, and he no longer cares, because at least it means he can pee, can finally get the relief he needs so, so badly.

He can't do it and read the news at the same time, though, doesn't trust himself not to moan with the relief of it. Besides, with as badly as he needs to go, there's no way the mic won't pick up the sound of rushing liquid as it pours out of him (and oh, that thought is really not helping). Halfway through the community calendar, he grips himself more tightly, trying to hold on for just a few more moments.

Wednesday -- Oh god, just a little longer.

Thursday -- His body rocks in a tight circle, bladder aching. Ohh, not yet, please...

Friday -- Almost, almost... He's thankful the desk blocks Carlos' view, at least. Not that it will truly hide anything -- Cecil feels like there must be gallons of liquid inside him, easily enough to spread a visible puddle across the floor.

(Super. Not. Helping.)

"Saturday is Dark Owl Records' grand reopening. As many of you know, Dark Owl had been closed due to flooding. A pipe in the basement of the shop burst, causing water to pour into the space..." It's all he can do not to flat-out whimper into the mic as he reads the extremely detailed description, unable to keep from imagining the scene --the sudden spurt of water, a fine but pressurized spray, gradually increasing until it's gushing unstoppably.

"Andnowamessagefromoursponsors!" He slams his hand down on the button that will start the pre-recorded advertisement and surges up out of his chair. It's a completely involuntary movement, and he's vaguely, horribly aware that it means Carlos will in fact see everything, but he literally can't think about that right now, can't think at all past the unbearable pressure. His eyes slide shut as he moans and lets go, and --

Nothing happens.

"Oh no," he breathes, shifting his weight rapidly from foot to foot. "Oh no, nooo..." He needs to go, he needs to, and that's exactly the problem. He needs to relax and release but he can't relax, he needs to piss, he needs to go and he can't and the recorded spot is going to end at any moment and he's just standing there doing a frantic pee dance, moaning and clutching himself.

He looks longingly to the door, every fiber of his being wanting to just run for it. He actually takes an involuntary step in that direction, but -- he has only seconds left, he can't leave now --

He drops back into his chair, both hands shoved between his legs and gives one last whine as his body all but convulses, knees drawing up, feet lifting off the floor as his upper body folds forward.

If he'd thought the need was bad before, it's absolutely nothing compared to now, now that he's come so close to relief only to be denied by his own body. Fuck, he was so ready to piss.

He can't do it, he can't. He goes back to commercial. It's far too soon but he has no choice, he needs to get himself under control and he can't do it while recording. He has to keep holding it, has to, he just needs a minute, he thinks helplessly, clutching himself with both hands, rocking frantically back and forth, a desperate whine working its way out of his throat.

He can hear the strain in his voice when he begins speaking again, but honestly, he thinks he's doing pretty well, for someone about to --

He gasps helplessly into the mic as he feels himself leak. For one horrible moment he's sure this is it, it's all going to come spilling out, and everyone is going to hear, and he doesn't know what to do, just knows he needs to piss.

Somehow he manages to stop, to clamp back down on the urgency and keep holding on, but oh, it's a near thing. It's a moment before he can bring himself to look down, relieved to see that the wetness isn't visible on his pants.

So far.

Cecil gives a distressed whimper as he feels another trickle of heat slip past him. "Sorry about that, listeners, I -- I--" He tries to come up with an excuse, but he can't think, he feels like he's unraveling, and the thought only makes him want to wail even more.

Abandoning the sentence, he powers on with his notes, and the spasm passes, but oh, this is happening. There's no denying it now -- he physically can't wait any longer, but he can't -- not now -- but oh, he needs to -- he is --

Oh, help, help, he thinks. He can't help glancing up at Carlos, though of course there's nothing his boyfriend can do. He's standing with one hand pressed to the glass, watching with an expression of helpless concern. Cecil is so embarrassed at the thought, but somehow still calmed slightly by his very presence, enough to think a little.

He can't hold it any longer, and he can't lose control on the air. But maybe, if he can contain himself enough to keep it like this, just little leaks and drops... maybe he can make it to the weather.

(It's amazing how fast he's gone from trying his hardest not to piss himself in the studio, to longing for the moment when he can do exactly that.)

It's an odd balancing act, resisting the way his body wants to give in, to just pee, right where he sits, just please, please pee -- but trying not to fight too hard, knowing it's a fight he will not win. He tries his hardest to ride that edge of control, to just let out the unstoppable little drips but no more.

It feels so good, the tempting little tastes of the relief he so dearly needs. It's hard not to moan as more hot droplets spill into his pants, gradually forming small but growing wet patches. He's shaking with need and relief in equal measure, still gripping himself tightly, feeling rivulets of piss flow over his hand, the sensation of warm liquid trickling between his fingers only serving to make the need that much more urgent. He can hear his words lengthening as he tries to bury his frantic groans in the vowel sounds. The sound of piss squirting against fabric seems obscenely loud, but he's pretty sure that's just his own shame amplifying the sound inside his head.

He imagines he can feel the pressure lessening somewhat, and maybe -- maybe he can make it now. His pants are noticeably wet, but not soaked, and the worst of the frantic, mindless, gotta go now tension has eased, spilled out of his body and down his thighs, leaving him a little breathless and a lot embarrassed, but -- he can do this. It's only marginally less humiliating to have half an accident, and he still badly needs to go, but back in some semblance of his faculties, he can't bring himself to just...wet, not when he can still hold on. Not when he's finally this close to the end.

He struggles with himself during the weather -- this is it, this is his chance to finally, finally let go, and he's just letting it slip by, but -- no, he can hold it, just a little longer. There's only a few minutes left, and he's already let out so much, he can't possibly still be as full as he feels. He wants to pee, that's all, he's so tired of fighting it, but he can wait. He has to wait. He totally has this under control.

He realizes his mistake the moment the music ends. The moment he has to start speaking again, taking some fraction of his attention away from the desperate struggle to hold on. He's tripping over his words, but when he tries to slow down, to pay attention to what he's saying, he feels another burst of warmth between his legs. Clenching his muscles as tightly as he can only slows down the leak, and it feels like it goes on forever before he can finally make himself stop.

Leaning forward, he grinds the heel of his hand into his cock, as hard as he can, pressing the wet patch against himself. He can't, he can't --

Somehow he wraps up the show, and there's a quiet moment where he just sobs, not knowing what to do. He's finally free, but his muscles are locked in his desperation, and he's not sure he can physically stand up right now, let alone make it to the bathroom.

And then the door opens.

Cecil whines in mortification. For a moment there he'd actually managed to forget about Carlos, lost in the sensations of trying so hard and failing so miserably not to wet himself.

"Cecil, are you -- ohh," Carlos breathes, drawing close enough to see the mess on his pants, the way he's clutching himself.

"Carlos, I-- I'm so sorry, I c-couldn't wait anymore --" he sobs miserably, unable to bear the thought of the scientist seeing him like this.

"Hey, it's all right." Carlos' tone is gentle, soothing, and somehow that only makes him feel worse.

Cecil huffs a strangled, deeply bitter laugh. "I am...having an accident... As we s-spe-eak--" The last word dissolves into a pained whine as another one of those devastatingly slow pulses overtakes him, as if to prove his statement. It's even harder to stop this time, the pressure so much that a tiny spurt actually arcs up visibly through his pants. "Nothing about this is all right," he finally gasps out as he regains control.

Carlos is right in front of him, gently cupping his jaw, his thumb brushing away tears. "Yes it is, baby, it's okay. You tried so hard. You did so well, Cecil, no one knows what happened, just me."

That's bad enough, but in this moment even embarrassment is beyond him. "Carlos," he whimpers as another pulse of wet heat streaks down his thigh. "Have to go...so badly..."

"You're going right now," Carlos points out, and Cecil whines at the truth of it. He is, he has been, but his bladder is still throbbing with need. "I'll help you to the bathroom, if you want. Or..."

"Or?" Cecil repeats helplessly. He really needs there to be an 'or.'

Stripping off his labcoat and flannel quickly, Carlos drops to his knees in front of him, gently pulling Cecil's legs apart so he can get closer. Cecil sobs as the motion causes him to lose another spurt.

"Is this alright?" Carlos asks, wrapping his arms around Cecil's waist. Cecil doesn't know how he can even stand to be near him right now, but he leans into the embrace, nodding, needing the comfort of Carlos' arms.

"Can't hold it," he sobs. "Can't, oh, oh --"

"So don't," Carlos murmurs. Cecil gives a pained whine at the implication. "It's all right baby, I know, you've been waiting so long. It...I..." Carlos fumbles his words, and Cecil cringes at the thought of having put him in this position.

"Sorry, so sorry, Carlos, didn't mean to... You...you don't have to..."

"Cecil, no, no, it's okay baby, I promise. You don't need to be embarrassed. I mean I. It was kind of." Disgusting. Uncomfortable. "Beautiful? I mean, I didn't like seeing you hurting, but... You held on so long..."

It takes a moment for the words to actually register past the pain and humiliation but -- oh. Huh. He forces himself to look into his boyfriend's face, and. He looks almost as embarrassed as Cecil himself is, and...

Cecil feels the oddest pulse of arousal as he realizes Carlos is actually enjoying this.

He doesn't have time to contemplate the idea right now though. "Can't -- oh -- need to go now, Carlos, need..."

"Do it," Carlos says, a little breathless, stroking gently at his thigh, where the fabric of his pants is clinging to him, warm and wet and --

Cecil wails as he lets go, soaking himself completely, feeling his piss spurt unstoppably between their bodies. The relief crashes into him all at once, and he is moaning, and crying, humiliated and aroused and oh, it just feels so damn good he can hardly stand it.

He all but collapses against Carlos when he's finished, still trembling uncontrollably, breath hitching with tiny whimpers. Carlos just holds him, stroking his back, murmuring soothing noises, telling him it's okay, he did so good, everything is all right now.

Cecil instinctively wants to argue, but... "Y-you're sure no one..."

"No one heard, baby, I promise. You were a complete professional, it was...very impressive." Carlos is blushing again, biting his lip, and that look goes a long way toward making Cecil feel better.

Still, his voice comes out small, hesitant as he continues. "And... You... I mean... That was...okay?"

Carlos kisses him soundly, and Cecil responds, needing the contact, the physical reassurance. He's almost forgotten asking the question by the time they break apart. "That was incredible," Carlos responds.

With that look, that tone of voice aimed in his direction... It's not hard to believe it. Still, he cringes when he stands and sees the mess on the floor. Carlos wraps him in his discarded labcoat -- it doesn't entirely hide the stains, but it's highly unlikely they'll see anyone else between here and home -- while he himself trades his sodden t-shirt for the flannel and quickly cleans up. Cecil wants to protest, but his limbs are still feeling fairly shaky, and Carlos insists that he's got it.

Finally they're heading home, apparently with plenty to explore, but in this moment all Cecil knows is that Carlos has him, and that's enough.

[dlwritings]

Got Your Six | Tom Holland | pt 3

series masterlist found here

general masterlist found here

pairing - mob!Tom x reader word count - 4,332 warnings - swearing, masturbation (m), guns

summary - Things go south between April and Harrison, and (Y/N) is determined to get to the bottom of why.

(previous) (next)

About another two weeks passed, and I hadn’t seen Tom at all since the night we went clubbing. Even Harrison’s visits to the bakery became more seldom, and Tom was never with him when he did walk in. Something was off, I could tell. I just had no clue what it was. April could tell something was wrong, but she was just as clueless as I was as to what it was. She’d come home from her dates with Harrison alone, which had been sun a rare occurrence at the beginning of their relationship. After only a month since she met him, I knew she was smitten, so the sudden shift in his mood threw her off and worried her. It worried me, too. I may’ve despised Tom, but I really liked Harrison, and I liked that he made April so happy. It had been a while since a guy had done that for her. Plus, he was nice and put up with my asshole-ish banter.

Just when April started to get really concerned over the fate of their relationship, Harrison asked her out to dinner on a Saturday night. I could see the relief flood across her face the minute he called her. “He sounded just like his usual self,” she said with a smile. “Must’ve just had an off few weeks.”

“Must be,” I mumbled, flicking through channels on the TV.

April sighed, “Would it kill you to be happy for me?”

“I am!” I said, snapping my head to look at her. “Swear, I am.”

“But?”

I pressed my lips into a tight line and let a heavy breath out my nose. “But two weeks is a long time to be off,” I said. “And I just hope he hasn’t been keeping something from you.”

“Always the skeptic,” she said, her smile unfaltering. She pressed a kiss to my cheek and jumped up from the couch. “I’m gonna go get ready.” I waved her off as she went to change into her clothes for her date. Finally I settled on a rerun of Saved by the Bell that was playing on MTV. I stared at the screen, only half paying attention to what was happening.

When April came back into the room, she was dressed in a cute, simple, white romper and had her hair up in a curly ponytail. “You look cute,” I told her. “I hope I won’t see you here tonight.”

“I hope not too,” she said. “I feel like it’s been too long since I got laid.”

“When was the last time you guys had sex?” I asked her. She paused and thought.

“The night we went clubbing,” she said.

“Two weeks?” I clarified. She shrugged. “That’s a long time.”

“Not really,” she said.

“For two fairly sexual beings who are pretty much in a relationship?” I said. “That’s a pretty long time.”

“I guess,” she said. Again, she shrugged. “We’ll just break the streak tonight.”

“I’m sure you will,” I laughed. “Who could turn down a (Y/L/N) who looks as good as you?”

“No one, obviously,” she teased back.

-

After the night at the club, Tom was having some serious issues with Harrison’s relationship with April and (Y/N). Supportive friend could only come above boss for so long. He knew it was time to step in and say something, even if it wasn’t what Harrison wanted to hear.

When April left the house the next morning, Tom met Harrison in the kitchen. He was drinking a cup of coffee and scrolling through something on his phone. Tom got a bowl down from the cupboard and poured himself some cereal and milk before joining his friend at the table. “We need to discuss this,” Tom said. Harrison moved his phone from his face and looked at Tom with furrowed brows.

“Discuss what?” Harrison asked. Tom took a mouthful of cereal before he spoke.

“You’ve gotta break up with her.”

Harrison got angry as soon as Tom said it. Tom could tell. His jaw clenched, and he put his phone down on the table as calmly as he could. “And why the hell do I have to do that?” he asked.

“Because being with her is a mistake,” Tom said. He was going to stay calm and not lose his head. He didn’t fight with Harrison, and he wasn’t going to start that now.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” Harrison asked.

“You know what that means.”

“Enlighten me,” he said, narrowing his eyes.

“You’re signing her death certificate,” Tom said. “She doesn’t know what she’s dealing with here, and bringing her into all of this is going to kill her.”

“You don’t know that!” Harrison shouted.

“I know that better than anyone!” Tom shouted back. “This is too dangerous of a business to involve anyone you care about.”

“Don’t act like you’re so high and mighty,” Harrison said.

“Meaning?”

“Meaning the walls aren’t made of paper, mate,” he said, “and any name could leave your lips when you jack off, but you choose hers. You’re just lucky April wasn’t there when I heard you.”

Everything about (Y/N) drove Tom crazy. The fact that she couldn’t stand him made him unable to stand her. She had such a mouth on her, not giving a shit about what she said to him or how she came off. Most girls he knew would smooth talk their way into a one night stand, but (Y/N) didn’t want anything to do with him. And Tom was serious when he told her he didn’t like the chase. Didn’t want the chase. He couldn’t care less if she didn’t want him to pin her to the mattress and mark her body, or-

“Shit,” he mumbled to himself. It was the night they went clubbing, and they had just gotten home. All Tom could think about was (Y/N) in that dress. The dress that hugged every curve and dipped just low enough on her chest that made him want more. He gave up on maintaining self-control and tugged his trousers and boxers down his legs. He had been hard ever since he got home, unable to think of anything except (Y/N). As he spit on his hand and gripped my cock, he thought about her ass pressed against him as they danced.

Tom pictured himself slamming into her, gripping her neck and pinning her face against the mattress. She’d beg for more, beg him to fuck her harder. He’d comply, snapping his hips violently against her.

“Ah fuck,” he moaned, brushing his thumb against his tip.

Tom could picture her on her knees, sucking him off. She’d look up at him, her eyelashes fluttering against her cheeks. He would grip her hair tightly and force her to take all of him, letting her gag on his cock.

“Shit, (Y/N).” Tom squeezed his eyes shut, bringing his other hand down to cup his balls. “Fucking hell, baby.”

He would cum all over her face, getting some of it on her tongue so she could have a taste. Then he’d snap a picture so he’d never forget how fucking gorgeous she was after he used her however he wanted to.

“Jesus, fuck (Y/N)!” Tom came across his own chest, not stopping his hand movements until he was fully spent. His chest heaved as he caught his breath. Was it possible to hate someone and want to fuck them this badly?

“You had no right you fucking-”

“It’s not like I put my ear up to the fucking door!” Harrison shouted, throwing his hands in the air. “I was walking down the stairs, and you’re loud as shit.”

“Just because I’d fuck her doesn’t mean-”

“Do you send Paddy off to check up on all the girls you just want to fuck?” Harrison asked. Tom’s jaw clenched tighter. “What are you making that kid do that for?”

After the four of them went to dinner, Tom felt like something was off. He knew Mackie had some of his people -he only recognized Stan and Duke, but there was a third guy he didn’t quite see- watching them, and he couldn’t help but feel a bit uneasy over it. He called Paddy into his office and had him sit in front of him. Paddy wasn’t officially in the family yet -he was just a few months short of 16 when he’d be initiated- so Tom figured he’d give him a task he didn’t want the others to know about. Plus Tom had always had a soft spot for his youngest brother, and he knew he was itching to join the business.

“I just need you to check up on some people for me,” Tom explained to Paddy. “There’s no threat on you, I just need you to go see them and make sure Mackie’s not on them.”

“Okay,” Paddy said with a nod. “Who are they?”

“Their names are April and (Y/N) (Y/L/N),” Tom said. “They work at Bake and Brew downtown. Just-” He gave Paddy a handful of cash. “-get yourself a coffee and a sweet or something and sit there for a while. Let me know if anything seems wrong.”

“Alright,” Paddy said. He stood up to leave the room, but stopped in the doorway.

“Is there something you need?” Tom asked him. Paddy turned to look at him.

“Why do you need me to check on them?” he asked. “Who are they?”

If anyone else had questioned an assignment, there would’ve been consequences but, as stated, Tom had a soft spot for his youngest brother. So, he approached him calmly and clapped him on the shoulder. “Never ask questions,” Tom told him. “I’ll always tell you everything you need to know.” Paddy stood up straighter.

“Okay, boss,” he said. Tom cracked a bit of a grin and squeezed his shoulder. He turned to leave again, but Tom let out a sigh that made him stop.

“Just a couple girls I’ve gotten to know,” Tom said, “and I’d like to make sure nothing happens to them.”

Paddy nodded and, without another word, was gone.

“Paddy needs experience before initiation,” Tom said.

“Spying on the girl you like isn’t experience, Tom, and you know that,” Harrison said. “You’re sending him off to do that because you didn’t want me or Harry or Sam to know that you care about her.”

“That’s enough!” Tom shouted, standing up from the chair. Harrison did the same. “You end it with her, now.”

“I can do whatever I fucking want,” Harrison said.

“You’d do good to remember who you’re speaking to right now,” Tom said, his eyes narrowing and his voice lowering.

“You don’t scare me, Tom,” Harrison said.

“By keeping her around, you’re putting everyone in danger!” Tom said. “Not just her, you know that right? If Mackie knows about them, or if you ever put your guard down because of her, you risk everyone’s life. I won’t put up with you being selfish because you think you love her.”

“If you think Mackie knows, then why did you send Paddy to see them?”

“I’m not discussing this any further.”

“If you think Mackie’s got people on her, then you knowingly put him in danger,” he said. “Talk about signing a death certificate. And for your own family too. I thought family meant more to you than-”

Tom cut Harrison off by pushing him against the wall and delivering a punch to his jaw. He groaned, and Tom took his shock as an opportunity to hit him in the gut. Harrison retaliated soon enough and hit Tom across the cheek. They were only fighting for a few minutes before Harry and Sam came in and pulled them apart. “What the fuck is going on?” Sam asked, holding Harrison back.

“Tom’s an asshole, that’s what’s going on!” Harrison shouted.

“Harrison’s forgetting that I’m the one in charge!” Tom shouted back. “I should kill you for laying hands on me!”

“You laid hands first!” Harrison spat.

“Commandment number four!” Harry shouted, getting a better grip on my shirt. “Number four!”

Holland Family Commandment number four: no fighting among members.

“I’m the fucking boss around here!” Tom said. “I can break whatever goddamn commandment I want!”

“That’s not how we do things here, and you know that,” Harry said. The four of them were quiet, only their heavy breathing filling the room. “Whatever the fuck just happened here, you two need to sort it out,” he said. “I’m not mopping either of your blood off the floor.” Harry and Sam let go of Tom and Harrison and left them alone again. Tom clenched his jaw and ran his hands through his hair.

“We’re cutting them both off,” he said. “You break up with her, now.”

Harrison sighed. “At least give me time. I can’t spring it on her like that.” Tom pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Two weeks,” he compromised. “Two weeks, and you end it.”

“Fine,” Harrison agreed. “But if I find out you’ve been protecting (Y/N) and leaving April to fend for herself, I’ll-”

“You’ll what, Harrison?” Tom asked. “You’ll what?”

Harrison left the room in silence.

Tom knew he needed to blow off some steam, so he went back to his room, changed into some gym clothes, and headed to their gym in the basement. He wrapped his fists and headed over to the punching bags. Even though most of his business was done with his hand on a gun, it was nice to have good hand-to-hand combat skills as well. He had yet to really need to use them, but he was always glad he had them under his belt. Besides, boxing was a nice way to get out his anger out when he didn’t want to actually hurt someone else.

Most of the time, Tom didn’t want to hurt other people. Hell, most of the time he didn’t want the job. When a job like that is handed to you, though, you can’t exactly turn it away. Tom just tried to make it his own and work with his set of morals. That isn’t to say that his morals hadn’t changed since getting the job. He was much more fond of the whole “an eye for an eye” than he was before. Still, that wasn’t to say that he enjoyed it. He just was much more passionate about what it meant. You mess with his people, he messes with yours. It seemed only fair, and in his business, fair is the name of the game. It may not seem that way, but it is. Tom didn’t like to do anything to someone that they didn’t have coming.

Tom started rhythmically punching the bag in front of him, grunting each time his fist hit the fabric. He wasn’t picturing anything in particular, but his mind was wandering to his conversation with Harrison. He didn’t have feelings for (Y/N). Feelings made you weak, and you couldn’t be weak with his job. Plus, the more people you care about, the more people the enemy can hurt. The last thing he wanted was to drag anyone into this business who didn’t belong or didn’t want it. That’s all he was doing by telling Harrison to leave April. He knew what it was like to get thrust into this life, and he didn’t want that for anyone else. Not if he could help it.

Paddy was different. Did Tom want that life for him? No. Was it part of his destiny? He supposed so. It ran in their family’s blood. Plus, it seemed like it was what he wanted. While Paddy and Tom were similar in a lot of ways, they were complete opposites in the way they handled the business. Not yet in it, Paddy looked at it all with wide eyes and an eager mind. Tom looked at it through the lenses of reality and experience. When he was Paddy’s age, he looked at it with fear. It wasn’t what he wanted, but it was what he was destined to have. At least Paddy was looking forward to it. Tom did wish that he could keep Paddy away from it. Save at least one Holland from a likely untimely demise.

-

I was already watching a movie on my laptop in bed when April came home at 9:00. “You’re home early,” I called when I heard the front door open and close. She didn’t say anything back, so I closed my laptop and sat up a bit straighter. “April?” I called.

Just when I was about to get out of bed and check on her, she came to my door. I could tell straight away that she had been crying. “What’s going on?” I asked, moving my laptop to my nightstand and opening my arms for her to come lay with me. She did, all but running over and jumping onto my bed.

“Please don’t say I-told-you-so,” she said, her voice muffled because it was pressed against my stomach.

“I won’t, I won’t,” I said, brushing my fingers through her hair. “What happened?”

“He dumped me!” she cried.

“Oh, April,” I sighed. “I’m so sorry.”

“He told me he just didn’t see us working out,” she said. “I don’t know what happened! I thought we were working out fine.”

“Was that all he said?” I asked. “That’s hardly a reason at all. Sounds like a cop out.”

“He said-” She sniffed. “-some bullshit thing about not mixing business and pleasure.” I froze. “It didn’t even make any sense,” she continued. “He was just stringing a bunch of words together.”

“He really said that?” I asked.

“Mhm,” April hummed. “Feel so stupid.”

I sighed. “Please don’t cry,” I said, placing a kiss to the top of her head. “I can’t stand to see you cry, and he’s definitely not worth it.”

“I really really liked him, (Y/N),” she said. “I just want to know what I did wrong.”

“I know, hon,” I sighed. “I’m sorry.” She sniffed and reached for my laptop.

“What were you watching?” she asked.

“The Hangover,” I told her. She opened up my laptop and pressed play on the movie, getting under the covers beside me.

I could hardly concentrate on the film anymore. Maybe I was wrong, but this break-up felt like it had Tom written all over it. The whole mixing business and pleasure thing were his exact words that I had heard before. April leaned her head on my shoulder and cuddled up to me. It reminded me a lot of how we were when we were kids. April and I were always close, and we never went through phases where we couldn’t stand each other. I always let her borrow my clothes, and we only fought over stupid things that we treated as more of a joke than anything else. From day one, I was always willing to do anything for her. This whole situation would be no different.

The next morning, I woke up before April did and got ready for my day. It was around 9:00, and I had plans. I had a mission with one goal: confront Tom Holland and call him out for the asshole he was. By the time I was showered and ready to go -around 10:00- April was still sleeping. I placed a kiss to her forehead and headed out. It was better if she didn’t know what I was up to anyway. The last thing she would want would be me meddling.

I drove to Tom and Harrison’s house and was a little confused when the gate was open. Confused, but relieved. I wasn’t sure they’d let me in if I said, “I’m here to destroy Tom Holland.”

I parked the car and stormed up to the front door, then pounded my fist against the wood. “Tom!” I shouted. “Open this fucking door right now!” I kept knocking until, finally, the door opened. Tom was not who was on the other side, though, nor was it Harrison. The boy looked a little bit younger than me and bared a striking resemblance to Tom. I figured they had to be related. “Where’s Tom?” I asked, putting my hands on my hips.

“He’s busy right now,” the boy said, his face showing no expression.

“I don’t care,” I said. “I need to speak to him.” Ignoring the boy’s protests, I pushed past him and into the house. “Tom!” I shouted, trying to focus instead of gaping at the beautiful interior of the house. Just when I was going to yell his name again, I walked into the man in question.

“What are you doing here?” he asked, wiping his hands on his trousers as he walked down the fancy staircase.

“I’m here to tell you you’re a fucking asshole, that’s what I’m doing here,” I snapped.

“I can’t do this right now,” he said, pinching the bridge of his nose. “You need to leave.”

“Like hell I do,” I said. “Is this what you meant by that bullshit phrase don’t mix business and pleasure? Forcing Harrison to dump my sister? Where the hell do you get off?”

“I’m not telling you this again,” Tom said. “You need to leave.”

“No!” I said. “You and me are gonna sit down and have a conversation about this.” I pushed past him and walked further into the house, ready to sit somewhere so I could give him a piece of my mind. “I’d love to hear whatever pathetic excuse you can come up with for making Harrison break my sister’s heart. Because right now-”

I froze mid-step, mid-sentence, and stared at the scene in front of me.

In the center of the room was a person, covered in blood, slumped over in a chair. Harrison’s fists were coated in blood, and there was another boy standing beside him pointing a gun at the bloody body. I covered my mouth with my hand and took a step back. “What, what the fuck?” Harrison and the boy turned to look at me. Harrison’s eyes grew wide, and the other boy -who had to have been the twin of the boy who answered the front door- looked at Tom, confused. “What’s going on?” I asked. For some reason, I was more angry than I was afraid. “What did you do? What the hell are you doing?”

“What is she doing here?” Harrison asked, ignoring me. The boy who let me into the house entered the room then, and Harrison looked at him. “We told you not to let anyone in.”

“She got past me,” the boy said with a shrug.

“Yeah, and I’m sure you put up a big fight,” Harrison said with a roll of his eyes.

“Someone better tell me what the fuck is going on,” I said, shouting to get my point across. The boy who was holding the gun suddenly turned and pointed it at me. “Jesus fuck!” I said, flinching and holding my hand up in front of my face (as if that would stop a bullet).

“Just say the word, boss,” the boy said.

“Boss?” I said, looking around for someone else -perhaps an actual adult- I might not‘ve seen before.

“Well we’re not killing her!” Tom said, prompting the boy to lower his gun. Boss? Tom? That’s what he meant by that nickname?

“You’re the one who says if anyone walks in on shit they’re not supposed to see-”

“I know what I say!” Tom snapped, cutting him off. “But now I’m saying something different. We’re not killing her.” The boy lowered his gun with a roll of his eyes and held it loosely between his fingers.

“Tom,” I said, “I swear to God above if you don’t tell me what the fuck is going on-”

“Sam!”

The boy with the gun -Sam, I figured- turned to look at Harrison when he called his name, but it was too late. The bloody man -who was in fact not dead or unconscious- grabbed Sam’s gun and pointed it at me and Tom. Tom acted quicker than I could even process what was happening. He reached behind him, grabbed a gun that was shoved in his pants, pointed it at the guy, and shot him. The person went limp, the gun falling from his hand. I covered my mouth with my hand and felt my legs start to shake. “You just-” I inhaled sharply. “You just killed him.”

“Before he killed me first, yeah,” Tom said, running his hand through his hair. He looked at me for the first time, and I noticed his demeanor shift a bit. “Hey, are you okay?”

“Wow, look who has a heart under all that blackness,” I said. “No, I’m not okay. You just fucking killed someone. I-” Everything started to catch up to me, and I knew I was about to be sick. “Where’s-” I took a deep breath. “Where’s the bathroom?” Tom and Harrison both pointed to a room behind us, so I pushed Tom and ran out of the room

“But (Y/N), just so you know there’s-”

I ignored Tom and pushed the door open. It was a mistake, obviously. The sink in the bathroom was covered in blood, and there was a knife next to it. I collapsed to the ground and threw up in the toilet. This was too much. No way was this happening. This was a dream. A nightmare. A sick, twisted nightmare that I was going to wake up from.

Tom slowly opened the bathroom door and walked in, leaning his back against the counter and folding his arms across his chest. I threw up again. “What is this?” I asked, finally catching my breath. “The fucking mob?” I was being sarcastic, but Tom’s silence made another wave of nausea hit me.

I was going to wake up, I was sure of it.

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[lauras-collection]

More Than I Know [Part 1]

Tom Holland x female Reader

Masterlist

Summary: You and Tom need to find a way to deal with the situation that the world thinks you’re dating. And the only way to do that is pretending to be dating, right?

Words: 1.4k

Warnings: swearing, nothing else I think

A/N: I’m really happy you guys liked the prologue to this series! I hope you like this one, too! I brainstormed a lot of ideas for the second part last night soooo get excited :D

This is my second try at posting this... I hope you get to see it this time :D

Prologue

When Tom got a call from his publicist early on a Sunday morning, he knew something was up. His first thought was that he had accidentally spoiled something from a movie again. But that was not what this was about.

“Tom. We talked about this. If you’re going to date someone you need to tell me about it.” She sounded like she had told Tom this about a hundred times. But he’d heard about this only once. He was confused because he didn’t have a clue what she was talking about. Until he remembered the afternoon he had spent with you and that you had hugged him basically in the middle of the street for everyone to see.

“Someone saw that? It was absolutely not what it looks like. It wasn’t really a date.” He had no idea how he would explain what it actually was, but he didn’t have to.

“That doesn’t matter now. The pictures are all over the internet. And I’ve got a plan.”

-

It had been a couple hours since you found out that the guy you spend your whole Saturday afternoon with was an international movie star. We’re talking Hollywood. And you were fuming. He could’ve said something! But he didn’t and now your pictures were popping up on more and more websites by the minute. No one had found your Instagram yet but it was only a matter of time until the follow requests would flood in. You wanted to call Tom and tell him off but you couldn’t. You didn’t have his number. You had to wait until he would call you. And you weren’t sure if he would. You had done a little digging and found out that he hadn’t really been spotted with someone in the last few years, besides his co-star Zendaya but they were apparently just friends. Your theory was that his agents, or whoever is responsible for his public image, wanted him to stay single, at least in public, so all his fans wouldn’t be disappointed that he was taken. But that was just a theory. And it might have been one of 28 theories you had come up with this morning.

You were in Tesco stocking up on some comfort food when your phone finally rang. It was an unknown number. You accepted the call and before you could say anything Tom’s voice reached your ear.

“I am so sorry Y/N.” He sounded genuinely sorry, which made your anger dissipate a little bit.

“Tom?”

“Yeah. Yeah, it’s me.”

“You could’ve told me that you’re an A list celebrity.” You kept your voice low, not wanting anyone to hear. You were afraid that someone would recognise you from the photos, so you were wearing a baseball cap that you had pulled as far into your face as possible. It probably made you look suspicious.

“And how would that have worked out? ‘Hi, I’m Tom. I shoot movies and walk red carpets for a living.’?”

“For example.” You were standing in front of the freezers deciding which ice cream you should get when Tom called, but now you were just standing in the middle of the aisle, the ice cream was long forgotten.

“You would’ve thought I was a downright asshole.”

“Aren’t you?” The line was quiet. “Tom, I’m joking.” You heard him let out a breath.

“I was scared for a second.” He chuckled. “Look, it was refreshing to have a conversation with someone who didn’t know I’m an actor. Who only saw me as a normal guy in a coffee shop. And I’m sorry that someone saw us and you got dragged into this whole thing.”

“It’s okay Tom, it’s not your fault. I was just caught off guard… What happens now?”

“Well, I wanted to talk to you about that. But I think it’d be better to do in person. Can we meet up?”

“Uh, yeah sure. I’m out anyway. Where do you want to meet? The coffee shop?”

“If you’re okay with that. I don’t know if there’s gonna be someone taking pictures again.” Which wouldn’t be a problem if you agree to Tom’s – or rather Tom’s publicist’s– plan. But he couldn’t say that.

“Oh, that’s alright. I’m wearing a disguise.” You glanced at your reflection in the glass panel of the freezer.

“A disguise? Like what? Those glasses with the moustache?” He laughed at the image and you joined in.

“No! Just something to hide my face, ya know? Anyway, I’ll see you there in about 20 minutes?”

“Sounds good to me. See you there.”

You looked at the contents of your basket after you ended the phone call and contemplated whether you should still get three bags of crisps and carry them to the coffee shop or if you should just come back later. You’re sure this talk wouldn’t take long so Tesco would still be open then. You put the bags back to where you got them from and left the store, walking the short distance to the coffee shop. You glanced around you, afraid that someone would snap a picture of you. But you were sure that as long as Tom wasn’t next to you, you wouldn’t really stand out.

The table in the back where you had sat with Tom the day before was unoccupied so you sat down waiting for him. Not long after Tom appeared in front of you, in a similar get-up to yours, black jeans, black jumper, black baseball cap. He orders his coffee at the counter and joins you a couple minutes later, a steaming mug in his hand.

“We probably look like we’re about to rob a bank.” You say as Tom takes a seat across from you.

Tom made a surprised face. “And here I thought I was going to surprise you with that plan.” You just rolled your eyes but couldn’t help but let a small smile slip on your face.

“And what is the real plan?”

“I’m not sure if you’ll find this funny because let’s be honest the irony.” He let out a chuckle. “Or if you’ll be mad.” He looks at you for a moment and you signal him to go on. You were intrigued. “My publicist thinks it’d be a good idea to be seen a bit more together. Because I don’t have a movie coming out in the next couple of months and I’m not doing any press either, it’d be something to keep my name in peoples minds or something like that.” He rolls his eyes. “So she actually proposed the idea that we go on some more dates. Or fake dates, whatever you wanna call them.”

“I’m not sure if you’re being serious or if you’re making fun of me.” You look at him sceptically.

“I’m serious! That also means I can accompany you to your sister’s wedding.” He raised his brows a bit, a smirk on his face. He knew how badly you wanted to take someone to your sister’s wedding. You asked a freaking stranger to join you!

“Except that instead of just lying to my family, we’re lying to the whole world.”

“Pretty much yeah.”

You were conflicted. On the one hand, you really liked Tom and he would make a great impression on your family and you wouldn’t have to deal with all the comments you would usually receive. On the other hand, this would make things so much more complicated, if the whole world knew that you were seeing Tom Holland… What were your friends going to say? You had obviously never mentioned Tom. You met him literally yesterday!

“Do I have a choice?” You didn’t really. Everyone you knew had probably already seen the pictures and you didn’t want to tell anyone that you didn’t know him. Maybe you wanted everyone to think that someone like Tom would be interested in you. Movie star or not, Tom was a catch.

“Of course you do! I don’t wanna force you to do anything that you’re not comfortable with. But you wouldn’t have to do anything ridiculous. You’d only have to hang out with me every once in a while.” He laughed lightly shrugging his shoulders a bit before taking a sip from his mug.

“I think I can handle that.”

Tom almost choked on his coffee. “You’ll do it?” His eyes were wide and hopeful.

“Yeah, I mean, what’ve I got to lose? I can’t really tell my sister that the reason I was with you was to lie to her and I really don’t want to go to that wedding alone. And I like hanging out with you. Who cares who sees, right?” You shrug your shoulders and send him a small smile.  

Part 2

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