#and it didnt even bkther u at first but also it couldve been becux h were in the middle kf the banter so its like u automatically defended
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hhhhhhhhhhhhh thinking aloud dont mind the tags lmao
#trying to decide whether u will be addeessing something thats kinda stupid but that bothers u with a friend is hard#like it feels stupid and inconsequential#and it didnt even bkther u at first but also it couldve been becux h were in the middle kf the banter so its like u automatically defended#instead of thinking about the fact that it didnt feel great#or ur brains just being stupid n trying ti find problems to feel bad about#or whatever#is really difficult#like it feels like it should be simple just bring it up its small and not that big a deal and itll be over n done with right quick#and if its bigger ull be able to get that out of the way#cuz u kno theyre not gonna be mad at u for having Feelings about something and would want u to say something if something bothered u#but at the same time its like hhhh but what if its just wasting time and ur being a baby and uve already been sensitice about stuff#uve used uo ur sensitive points u need to be a big boy and not get upset at stuff and keep some semblance of dignity#even tho the fact that uve alrwady been open about stuff that bkthers u and its gone over well shows that it doesnt matter#but ur damn pride gets in the fucking way#cuz it was a bit its always a bit it happened during a bit it shouldnt bother u its just banter whatever#n u just feel bad about feelong bad about feeling bad about feeling bad about feeling bad about and so on and so on it#n u hate it all so much feeling stuck and over thinking it and shit so u know ull just end uo doing nothing about it and suffering#and then forcing urself to forget it hapoened so u can just bury it all and be a funny guy more often cuz if u get upset during a bit#then u cant be a guy with his lil bits.....#n u also know that if u bring it up itll end up making them feel bad or upset probably n itll just be a feed back loop of feeli g upset cuz#u upset the other person#even tho the upset is like a normal amount of upset it just feels like too much to bother with sumthing so small#but also if its botbering u this much it prob means its a big problem but u also know ur stupid dramatic and nothings ever a big as ur#feelings say#so ur probably better off just not saying anyrhing#cuz ur also worried that if u do bring it up and u talk about what is and isnt toj much to say ull end up making thiwr life harder#by having special requirements or itll mess uo the banter and make it less fun for them since they need to be CAREFUL lest rhwy upset u#delicate sensibilites or whatever#but ue just sitting there like god u need to srop being sucha baby n grow a thicker skin ur parents n 5th grade teachers were fucking righ#n now ur on tumblr comaining like an asshole instead of making a stupid descion grow the fuck up god
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