#and is it so surprising that the word 'massacre' is nowhere near what chinese people call the event. | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

faeriexqueen · 7 years ago

Note

Hello, I hope I'm not late for asking on that prompt thing yulma + 28 ^^

You are never too late to request some Yuulma! :D

Title: PromisePairing: Yuulma (Alma Karma/Yuu Kanda)Chapters: 1Words: 2,818Summary: What Kanda said shouldn’t have bothered Alma. After all, it wasn’t like they spoke anymore to begin with. (Prompt for “We are not friends!”)AO3: http://archiveofourown.org/works/11842101FF: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12620260/1/Promise

It shouldn’t have bothered Alma. But it did.

Alma couldn’t blame Kanda. Aftereverything that had happened – after trying to kill Kanda twice – Alma couldn’t blame Kanda for saying what he had said.Kanda more than likely hated Alma now. That much seemed obvious; why else would Kanda hardly spare a glance inAlma’s direction, and so purposefully avoid looking at him? Not that the two of them had much of a chance to interact. After the disastrous incident at the NorthAmerican Branch, Alma’s barely alive body (an abomination, really) had beenconfiscated. Alma didn’t remember thedetails of everything; his mind was fuzzy with hatred, and the influence of theMillennium Earl. He didn’t even know howhe was still alive – hadn’t he been intended to self-destruct? That was what the Noah had wanted…except thatother one. The one with white-hair. That boy who had a Noah inside him. Whathad happened to him?Alma didn’t know – no one had told him. No one cared to. It was unclear to Alma just how much time had passed since the whole incidentoccurred. Enough had passed that he’dbeen able to regenerate. It had beenpainful, not only in the physical sense, but in the psychological one as well.Why couldn’t they have just let Alma die?A part of Alma wished that the Order and the Noah would have let him and Kandajust kill each other off. Staying aliveonly caused suffering, and it was not even a life that either of them had. Kanda was still caught up in that person, and Alma was trapped by thenotion that he was forever a part of that person.Alma didn’t even know if he could be called his own person anymore. His mind. His feelings. Ownership of suchthings suddenly seemed impossible.Freedom, too. Once Alma had shown signsthat he was going to somehow recover, the scientists had kept him onlockdown. It was expected; Alma wasconsidered highly dangerous, and had been responsible for a massacre evenbefore he was infused with dark matter. But, that also made him somehow valuable tothe Black Order, and worth keeping. ‘As a weapon,’ Alma reminded himselfbitterly. ‘They always meant to keep us as weapons.’The Black Order really was no different than the Noah, it seemed.Eventually, Alma had been repaired enough physically so that he didn’t need tobe practically quarantined. He stillalways had someone supervising him – Alma didn’t know if he’d ever get a momentalone ever again. But, he was at leastable to be exposed to other members of the Black Order after being transferredto European Headquarters. Although it was debatable on whether or not that was a good thing. Many of Alma’sakuma characteristics were still evident: the pointed ears, the coloredmarkings, the tail. Alma was just as freakish as he always was,except this time it was visible to the naked eye. He had always been a freak. Being called an apostle of God had beennothing more than a nice way of saying such.Most members of the Order seemed to avoid Alma. They maybe chanced a glance in his direction at best, but then wouldlook away quickly before whispering to one another. It angered Alma, but he had to do his best topretend he couldn’t hear. Any signs ofloss control would mean instant isolation, if the threat wasn’t great enough towarrant a death it seemed.Being able to go out was how Alma periodically saw Kanda though. The interactions were hardly non-existentthough. Kanda often ignored Alma,pretending the second exorcist-turned-akuma didn’t exist. And Alma would do the same. On more than one occasion, Alma had noticed people looking at the two of themnervously, as though they had no idea what to expect. Usually, Alma felt the same. He never knew what to expect with Kanda. But Kanda probably hated him.Alma tried to tell himself he wasn’t upset by this.But, then came the day where Kanda said something. It wasn’t to Alma – how could it have been,when Kanda never even looked his way? No, it had been to some Chinese girl – Lenalee, and exorcist and theyounger sister of Chief Komui Lee. Sheand Kanda had been in the dining hall, when Alma and his supervisor had arrivedthere to get dinner. Kanda and Lenaleehad already been seated, though Lenalee had spotted Alma before turning toKanda. She had kept her voice soft in alikely attempt to make sure Alma couldn’t hear her speak, but Alma’s acutehearing picked up on the words regardless.“Hey, Kanda? Do you think…you’ll evertalk to Alma again?”Kanda hadn’t bothered to glance up from his soba. When he didn’t answer, Lenalee triedagain. Her tone was wary. “I mean…you guys are-“ She caught herselfquickly, “-were friends, right?”This caught Kanda’s attention. He lookedup at Lenalee sharply. “We are not friends.” The words came out abruptly, and sounded harsh. Lenalee seemed a little taken aback, actually. Alma didn’t risk looking at them any longerthough, and focused his attention elsewhere. He felt a pair of eyes on him though, and Alma wondered if they belongedto Lenalee or Kanda. More than likely,it was just Lenalee. Kanda wouldn’tbother.It shouldn’t have bothered Alma to hear all this. It should have bothered Alma. Except it did. Alma and Kanda were not friends, and neverreally had been. And that upset him.Alma left the dining hall quickly.

~~~Night fell, and Alma was surrounded by silence. He had his own room, though the interior of it was minimal indecoration. Apparently, Alma was stillconsidered hazardous enough so that the Order didn’t even want to give him toomany unnecessary objects as though he’d use them as weapons somehow. It was a bit ridiculous to Alma, really – buthe hardly had time to notice such a detail when he had to deal with the factthat there was always a guard outside of his door. God, it was frustrating. Alma was basicallya prisoner, all while being trained to be useful to the Order in the HolyWar. ‘Justlike before. Just like I always was,’ Alma thought, as his eyes stared up at the ceiling. Dark. Stone. Alma had always dreamed of seeing the sky,but now he was just stuck with this. Stuck with this ceiling. Stuck in this prison. Stuck in the same hellhole as Kanda – someonewho Alma had once thought he could befriends with-‘Except we’re not. We’re not friends, and we never really were,’ Alma tried to tell himself, as he desperately attempted to ignore the ache inhis chest. The ache he felt every timehe thought about Kanda.Suddenly, there were footsteps outside of Alma’s room. Ears perking at the noise, Alma turned hisgaze toward the door. That was peculiar– no one ever came down through the hallway Alma was in. He was somewhat cut off from the otherexorcists, and nowhere near the finders. The only time Alma ever heardfootsteps was if the guards were trading spots to watch his door, but technicallyit wasn’t time for a shift change. Almahad experienced enough sleepless nights to have memorized the timing by thispoint.Alma listened, and held his breath. Heheard no words, which was even stranger. Who was outside right now? Theirsteps were light, and almost inaudible – which said a lot, since Alma hadhighly sensitive hearing due to his akumatized form. The door clicked, and Alma realized whoever was outside was coming in. Immediately growing tense, he tried to decideon whether it would be wise to pretend to be asleep or not. As soon as the door opened, Almainstinctively shut his eyes as he feigned being asleep, as a childlike feargripped his heart.‘Just go away. Whoever you are, please just go away,’ Alma silently pleaded. He had no ideawho was in his room or why, but he did not want to deal with them.Whoever it was that had come in did not speak. They continued to walk softly, and Alma could soon feel their presenceas they stood right next to his bed. Alma forced himself to try to relax, wishing that people would leave himalone.The stranger sat down – on the edge of the bed. A familiar voice spoke. “Stopdoing that fake sleep shit. I knowyou’re awake.”Alma’s eyes shot open, and he turned his head. He sat up with a startled expression as he registered just who it was inhis room. Kanda. Kanda was in his room. He wassitting on the edge of the bed, arms crossed his face looking away fromAlma. Alma was confused, and in his bewilderment slightly irritable “What the hell are you doing in here?” Heasked, not sure what was even going on. “And how’d you know I was awake?”Kanda snorted quietly. “You alwayspulled that act when we were back in the lab. Sometimes when you wanted to get out of the experiments,” Kandacommented. His voice was quiet, but helda bitter edge. “Edgar almost fell for ita few times. Moron.”Alma frowned. He didn’t like rememberingbeing in the lab, and he especially didn’t like remembering being forced toattempt synchronization. Turning his gaze away from Kanda, Alma returned to his initial question. “Why are you here? I didn’t think I wasallowed visitors.”There was a venom in Alma’s tone, but he couldn’t help it. His life was dictated by the Order – he hadno say in anything. Neither did Kanda.Kanda’s mouth grew into a hard line. “Noone knows I’m here.”This caught Alma by surprise. Almalooked back at Kanda, his brow furrowed slightly. “What about the guard out-““That guy? Idiot dozed off fifteenminutes ago. He really should getfired.”Now Alma looked surprised. “What, wereyou waiting? Why?”Kanda sighed in an exasperated tone. “Why do you think?” He asked in annoyance. “I was trying to fucking get in here.“But why?” Alma interjected, his toneslightly heated. He had to remindhimself to keep his voice down, or else he might wake the guard outside. “It’s not like you’ve been reallyacknowledging my existence or anything.“Kanda remained quiet for a moment after that, and Alma wondered if maybe Kandawould just leave. The silence that fellbetween them was horrendously heavy, and breathing felt difficult.Finally, Kanda spoke. His tone wasnoticeably softer than before. “I’mleaving headquarters.”Alma barely registered the words. Aftera few seconds, they began to sink in. Alma’s expression must have given his realization away, because Kandatook one glance at Alma before quickly continuing.“Not permanently,” Kanda added. “Ijust…have to go find someone. Track themdown before I can come back here.”Alma felt his blood turn cold. He turnedaway from Kanda sharply, trying to ignore the pang of ugly jealousy hefelt. That person. Kanda was still obsessed and in love with that person. “Are you going to look for her?” Alma asked, his voice an icywhisper.God. That person. That person that was now Alma. Or at least, who Alma was made from. And Kanda was going to keep searching forher.Surprisingly, Kanda shook his head. “No. I’m not looking for heranymore,” He answered quietly. “This isjust some idiot I need to find…”Against his better judgment, Alma’s eyes moved back to Kanda. Kanda was looking away again, but Alma couldsee his profile. His hair was tied backin a ponytail, but his bangs seemed a bit longer and unkempt. His expression was distant.Alma’s frown lessened in severity, but still remained. His eyes flickered away again. “So why are you telling me? I thought we weren’t friends.”Kanda closed his eyes, and exhaled through his nose. He sounded frustrated. “You’re as stupid as ever,” He muttered,though Alma still heard perfectly well.Alma looked at Kanda sharply. “Excuseme?”Kanda turned, facing Alma directly. Itwas the first time he had done so in forever it seemed, and Alma wasmomentarily breathless from the unexpected directness of this interaction. Kanda, however,appeared unfazed.“You’re as stupid as ever,” Kanda repeated. His expression was oddly devoid of harshness as he said thisthough. “You’re as stupid as ever,because we are friends. And I’m telling you why I’m leaving so youknow I’m not leaving for good.”Alma was stunned. Stunned andsilent. ‘What…?’He wanted to ask, but the words seemed to stick in histhroat. They wouldn’t come out. ‘Ithought you hated me…’When Alma didn’t speak, Kanda took the opportunity to continue. His words sounded stiff, and his posture wasrigid. Alma suddenly realized that thiswas because Kanda was uncomfortable. Kanda usually didn’t speak this much.“I’m…I’m going to come back here. I’llcome back for you,” Kanda continued, voice soft and slightly gruff. “The Order can’t know though. They can’t know we’re…”His voice trailed off, but Alma understood. An onslaught of emotion immediately enveloped Alma, and he felt hisinsides tremble. He didn’t want Kanda togo. Even if it were temporary…Almadidn’t want to risk losing Kanda. Notagain.Without thinking, Alma grabbed Kanda’s wrist. He clutched at it tightly, his eyes downcast. “Yuu…I don’t want you to leave…” Almapleaded, his voice barely audible. “Whatif you don’t come back…?”The stiffness in Kanda’s expression broke, if only for a brief second. His eyes appeared to glimmer in the darkenedroom, though Alma couldn’t tell if that were because Kanda’s eyes were wateryor if it was just the way they happened to look. Or maybe it was because Alma’s eyes were watery that Kanda’s eyes looked such a way.Kanda took hold of Alma’s hand, gently rubbing his fingers over it. “I’ll come back for you, Alma,” Kandawhispered, as he brought Alma’s hand to his mouth, holding it close. Alma barely felt Kanda’s lips against theback of his hand, and his heart sped slightly as he felt Kanda pull him close,whispering gently into Alma’s ear. “Iwon’t let them keep you here. Ipromise.”Alma clung to Kanda tightly after hearing those words. He clung to Kanda until he fell back asleep.~~~When Alma woke up the next morning, it was cold. His room was still dark, and he realized thatthe sun probably hadn’t risen yet. Forsome reason, he felt sad – incredibly so. Within a few moments, Alma began to recall the events of the previousnight.Kanda. Kanda had come to his room. Kanda had told Alma he was leaving.Kanda had promised Alma that he would come back.Alma now remembered that he had fallen asleep while Kanda while still withhim. Like some weak child who neededprotection, Alma had fallen asleep in Kanda’s arms, clinging closely to him asthough Kanda would faded away into nothingness if Alma were to let go. Yet somehow, Kanda had still slipped out ofAlma’s grasp, all while Alma was in a slumber.Alma’s heart ached. He wished he couldhave said goodbye to Kanda one last time. He wished Kanda would have woken him before he left.But, Alma had woken up tucked under sheets that he had not bothered to coverhimself with. No doubt it had beenKanda’s doing. ‘Yuu…’ Alma thought, as he tried tosquash the painful yearning he could feel himself beginning to become consumedby. He wondered if Kanda had possiblynot left yet. Maybe Kanda would still bearound when Alma went to the dining hall for breakfast, or perhaps Alma wouldcatch a glimpse of him in the training room. Kanda had not specified when he was leaving.These thoughts gave Alma hope.But, when Alma when to the dining hall that morning there was no sign ofKanda. Lenalee was sitting with anothergroup of exorcists, and there was no sign of Kanda in the training room withMugen. Eventually, Alma accepted thatKanda had left. Kanda was gone.“I’ll come back for you, Alma.”Kanda had promised though. He hadpromised Alma he would come back.Later that day, it became more apparent to other people that the sword-wieldingexorcist had ventured off. The officialwho was currently supervising Alma had taken note of it, and found it forwhatever reason necessary to comment on“So, your friend took off, huh?” The official prodded, though his words werecold and did not warrant a friendly conversation.In response, Alma threw the man a cool glance before turning away. “We’re not friends,” Alma answered quietly.‘I’ll wait for you. Forever.’

11 notes · View notes