#and im not prepared in the slightest
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why is it so flipping cold it was like ninety three days ago
#its fall babeeee#and im not prepared in the slightest#i live in the desert so its ninety until january most of the time#ow my hands
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remember how i was like “oh haha wouldn’t it be something if taika and rhys turned up their whole ‘we wanted our little shoulder touches and pats to come across’ to a really romantic level and would have ed and stede affectionately touch each other whenever possible”
…yeah
yeah
#OFMD#OFMD Season 2#OFMD S2 Spoilers#Taika Waititi#Rhys Darby#Gentlebeard#Blackbonnet#Like uhhhhh yeah I may have said so#BUT WAS I PREPARED FOR THAT???#NOT IN THE SLIGHTEST AKDJWJDJS#NOT WHATSOEVER#AND IM STILL NOT#LIKE THE BTS IS MAKING ME AWARE#BUT IT IS NOT FULLY PREPARING AND WILL NEVER DO SO AKXNSND#I AM SO READY BUT I AM NOT
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Ralsei deltarune is literally so sketchy but also have we considered. That’s hes cute your honor have we considered this
#deltarune#decided im gonna replay deltarune and then maybe attempt to do evil bastard shit in undertale#cuz i am just so hyped up after replaying the pacifist route and want to do more but hm#just dont think im mentally prepared to kill these bitches yet#and ive literally forgotten everything that happens in ch1 of deltarune#im halfway through the first chapter and damn lol ralsei really is just so fucking sketchy#like he tells kris that their choices matter of course and he’ll support whatever they decide#but obviously kris cant actually make any decisions of their own and ralsei is like following the hero script to a T#and he gets upset with susie for constantly defying the narrative#i dont think id say ralsei is like the mastermind of this strange universe where you cant make choices#but he is suspiciously conformist like hes very eager to uphold a narrative and its like hes on a completely different planet#also you know theres the fact that hes like an alternate asriel or some shit#i dont trust him but despite this. he is very cute i do wanna kiss his nose#like hes such a satirized version of the pacifist that it feels fake as shit but i still love him#like. we go through the acid tunnel of love. DOES THIS MEAN NOTHING TO YOU#he could kill everyone and i wouldnt be surprised in the slightest and also im squishing his face
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Did anyone want to tell me that the talking phase of dating feels like 5d chess, and a bunch of tiny knives, and causes stress induced illness????
#okay im being dramatic#BUT#im analyzing every single text and every single interaction trying to figure out what he actually might mean#and where this is going#and for the LIFE of me i still don't know if he actually wants to date me or just fuck me#and as has been Well chronicaled due to my complete inability to NOT post my most personal details on Tumblr:#i am not interested in sleeping with him any time soon because i have like 100 problems with it that cannot be explained#but im also not Not interested in it at a later time. its just not right now#and yeah i would love to go hangout at your apartment and watch tv and cook dinner#together but if you put even the slightest pressure on me to sleep with you i am prepared to throw everything away#and thats not good either! i know that I cant be this avoidant but fuck i can't shove it down either#if you touch me gently i might throw up and i might also cry#i absolutely am not interested in taking this further right now#FUCK#ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh#vent post#pointless posts
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Y'all ever realize you might be a little too obsessed with your favorite characters but you've already planned a shrine and the almighty blorbos must be shown they're loved like they deserve
#for context I got an amazon gift card as a late christmas gift and got knockoff Uzi and N plushies#'cause I couldnt afford the on brand ones#and am planning on making a shrine in my room dedicated to them with fake candles and everything#i am not obsessed in the slightest not at all (lie)#in all seriousness i said i would as a joke but my brain refuses to make me a liar#so now im actually preparing a shrine for the plush's arrival
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after carlos tells the story of how miss jenn stopped homophobic bullying towards carlos, maddox lets out a breath and goes "wow." in a quivering voice... she's one of the four canonically queer characters and she's the only one who we don't know the backstory of, and that was her reaction to it.
i'm not saying anything but i'm not NOT saying anything.
i audibly said "oh no." FUCKS SAKE OH GOD OH NO
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If you're wondering, no. Reading the manga does not make the scenes in the anime hit any less harder, in fact they hit more.
I am going to go drink some water now from how hard I cried after the hard cut to Nobara and the scene with Miwa
#MY HEART IS BROKEN#at least the hype of the fight cheered me back up#also they showed that shot of nobara several times which was not done in the manga Mappa im calling my lawyers for the emotional damage#and hearing Miwa like#god#the manga doesnt prepare me for it in the slightest#jjk spoilers#jujutsu kaisen spoilers#jjk#jujutsu kaisen
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decided 2 try takin a picture anyway, and my tablet did Not die on me just yet, so here i am, visible again. for now.
#bunself#lil rushed on account of battery situation so im not perfectly thrilled w/ the result but#also this is . i didnt prepare in the slightest. u might say i woke up like this x3
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my mom and i might be the same person
#date went as well as i could expect#i knew he was a Democrat (tm) but i was not prepared for him to be a right wing democrat#i didn't really bring up my politics but#he insulted (blanketly) all anarchists and communists#and i left almost immediately after that#i didn't tell him what I was#it's ok to not share my politics (though god it would be amazing if i found someone like that)#but the moment you blanket statement say we're all privileged (not true???? in the slightest???)#im like. sorry man. i'm out#just extremely partisan all around
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was like duude i should foster a cat i bet that would be so awesome and fulfilling for me *forgot about the Rascal situation for 5 seconds*
#he is a wonderful guest and i do not regret what i did in the slightest but it does add a decently significant stressor in my life#when he gets adopted out it'll be a good while before im prepared to do that again#and im honestly glad i did this because it's giving me a lot of insight into my limits#no longer will i daydream about adding a 3rd cat into my family. i CANNOT do 3 cats.#two is my hard limit. especially since im living alone right now and the sole caretaker#if there was another person involved and caring for them with me i could potentially do 3 cats. but not right now.#and if i lose Hope or Olive ... i think it'd be a good while before i'm ready to add another animal to my family anyways#they are both so extremely special animals that it'd take a lot out of me to lose them#honestly i dont know that i'd get another animal for a very long time after they passed away. i don't think i'd be ready for a long while
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Ughhhhh ever since I woke up from my nap I've been in such a bad mooddddd
#my mom said some absolutely wack shit to me earlier#it's crazy bc I've been defending her to friends and such for months now being like#'oh she's actually not that bad'#turns out she's not that bad when I'm#preforming exactly how she wants me to#sighhh#turns out being scared and traumatized from ongoing medical trauma isn't acceptable for her#which is ok#whatever atleast she acted like a weirdo about it while I have a lot of support from friends and other such loved ones#and not like. days before surgery#or while I'm recovering from surgery etc etc#so now I have ample time to prepare for recovery without her bitch ass#she really sees any member of the family as someone to perpetuate her trauma it's wild#I have no beef with her in the slightest either#ive directed no malice to her or anyone im literally just suffering for my own reasons#the reasons being the fucked up matter of my health and trying to get care#it mainly just sucks bc I let my guard down enough to be like oh she's ok and I don't want to go no contact right when I'm able to#so she reminded me why I still want that lol#it's weird etc etc
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my first biology exam is tomorrow and i think i should kill myself for real
#im not prepared in the slightest i never know what rhe hell is going on in that class and my professor sucks at teaching NOTHING#sticks with me
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me: i'm going to self isolate so i can heal
also me: remembers i'm a roommate and in college and also must be so socially charged all the time because of everything i do so there is no isolation ever for me until i go home
#i fully expect my mental state to just fucking plummet the moment im not at school anymore#it's going to take a lot of fucking effort to just be okay#and i'm not prepared for it#not in the slightest#if today was any fucking sign
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i hate the thoughts in my brain and i dont know what to do abt that.
#rai.txt#sorry for being weirdly overshary its bc i should be asleep and im.not and im vaugely panicking over a situation that i am not at all#prepared for in the slightest#and im just rhinking shit that is making me fucking uncomfortable
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you’re spending your first christmas with matt and he decides to gift you something you two have always wanted!!
── .✦. ──
“okay keep your eyes closed sweetheart, ‘kay?” matt says while leading you through the quiet apartment. this year was your first christmas together, you two had moved into together a little over 8 months ago and it was the best decision you could’ve made. “matt i swear if i fall or get bumped into a wall its gonna be ugly.” you giggled, obviously not serious.
“yeah yeah baby, just follow my lead, slowly..” you can hear the grin in his voice but decide to ignore it. “are we almost there?? i wanna see my gift already” you complain, trying to sneak a peak by opening your eyes the slightest. “ah ah ah, you better keep your those closed, you’ll ruin the surprise.” just as he said that your now seated on the big couch, sensing the soft pillows laying against it you begin to get comfortable.
“now can i?? ughhh” you groan, now with your hands over your eyes. you hear matt laugh at your neediness, that was until you heard some shuffling. “give me a second, so needy are ya?” he rolls his eyes and prays that the kitty in his arms stays silent.
“okay now be careful, it could be anything you know.” he warns, your face scrunches as you mentally prepare yourself for this gift, he walks over to you and starts to place the kitty in your arms. “matt you’re scaring me..” before you could feel the soft fur he lifts back up the cat and tries to reassure you. “sweetheart don’t be scared, i promise i would never give you something dangerous. now hands out please?”
you reach out your hands and smile at his caring words, the way his voice always put you at ease immediately always warmed your heart. your thoughts are interrupted by the soft meows and soft fur against your fingers, you immediately open your eyes and freeze in shock. “matt, matt, matt. no you fucking didn’t.” your eyes now wide as ever as you cradle the baby kitten in your warm sweater, your eyes start to tear up anf you look up at your boyfriend who now has a sweet smile across his face.
“merry christmas sweet girl” you stand up and he takes you in his arms, now giggling as he wipes away the happy tears that fall down your cheeks. “y-you’re crying baby?” he laughs “well yeah! l-look at him matt! hes so adorable oh my god thank you.” you laugh as more tears fall down. “you deserve everything and anything ever, i live to see m’girl happy.” he says while kissing your forehead.
- avery’s note ˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆。-
here is a cutesy little lovie dovie blurb!! im crying i wish to spend christmas with matt and have him gift me a cute little kitty :(( (also btw my birthday is tmr and im soso excited!! if im a little inactive tmr thats why <3)
MERRY CHRISTMAS LOVIES!!!
𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 - @ellaapsworld @chrissv4mp @jetaimevous @mattsbrowser @submattenthusiast @flouvela @sturniolosiphone @chrislova @sophand4n4 @mattsfavoritestar @mattslolita @y3sterdaysproblem @strnilolover @cayleeuhithinknott @cherrynflowergarden @sturnsmia @slut4chris888 @marrykisskilled @chaossturns
#— ⋆ ˚。 writings .ᐟ ꩜#matt sturniolo fanfic#matt sturniolo blurb#matt sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#matthew sturniolo x reader#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo fluff#matt sturniolo imagine#matt sturniolo x reader
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There is a non-zero chance that i just completely break down in the next week or so and i just simply do not know what to do
#i messed up#i messed up SO BAD#and i thought i could fix it and i cant! i cant.#i have one avenue left and i dont think it will work#and im in exam season. i have an exam tomorrow!#and i am Not Prepared in the slightest. and its not going well. its just not.#:))))#i need therapy but i cant get therapy because my gp’s office are being assholes and not talking to me#literally. hanging up the goddamn phone on me#or just not calling me back#and all i need! is for them to fill out a stupid form! so i can take it somewhere else and they can do the hard part!#and get me treatment!#BUT THEY WONT.#anyway :)#itll be an interesting week-to-month
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