#and if i understand it correctly they're gonna be on a huge stage in the middle of central park

[jula483]

SCREAMING

[kvercetti]

writing my current situation to myself from 1 year ago.

here goes nothing..

hey kevin,

your summer break is about to end in a few days, and you'll be going into your sophomore year at mesa high. there's alot to say about that but let me tell you about freshman year for a sec. in detail.

your breakup with taylor was rough over the summer, but it's coming to an end soon. you're actually gonna start dating nicole in the first week of school, and you're gonna try your best for a while to truly fall in love with her, but that's never gonna happen. you're still hung over taylor even if you don't want to be so that's gonna be a problem with you and nicole. you're gonna stay with her for about 2 months; until the end or beginning of october. you guys break up. and you won't truly grasp the situation until way later.

at the start of the year, you're gonna think that your buddy aaron is really cool and you're going to try to get close to him. and it works. you guys are best friends and talk pretty much 24/7. that first month of school is as chill as it gets, so enjoy that. you're gonna have some fun times with the gang at superstition mall and things will be going pretty smoothly. that's until september, when things really start to change the course of your school year. aaron starts plotting on taylor, and at first you're gonna be pissed because she's your ex obviously, but because you're still hung over her you're gonna be in on it with aaron and you guys will become like a trio friend group. lots of texts, facetimes, and stuff of that nature. you develop hope that you and her could be together again because of how much you begin to talk to each other, but you're delusional.

you actually become a pretty bad person in a way. you break up with nicole because you feel like she's holding you back and that you have way better options (like taylor). you don't. actually, you don't even break up with her, she breaks up with you for good reason. she tells you after school that she thinks you guys are better off seperate. she says you've become immature and that aaron is a bad influence on you. you and aaron are best friends so you won't understand what she means and you'll think she's dumb. this is when things take a turn. you basically become like a replica of aaron. you obsess over being strong and going to the gym, your ego is huge, you add everyone and their momma on snapchat, and you start to treat women like objects. oh and you're horny as hell. this goes on for a few months. aaron starts dating taylor, and you become extremely jealous. they sit together during lunch (at the same table you and the guys sit at), they talk all the time during science, and basically they're eveything you wanted to be with her. these are some of the worst months of your life in all honesty. you hate everyone and everything and the only thing that matters to you is the gym. homecoming comes around, aaron and taylor are going together, and it was just a bad experience. oh and your kitchen burns down that night. during this time, you're kinda in a talking stage with macey, and you plot on her, but at the same time you don't put in much effort. she invites you to watch the fnaf movie, and you don't go. this is a cannon event. if i rememember correctly, you guys talk throughout october and november. at the end of november, you guys stop talking. oh and taylor breaks up with aaron at this time aswell.

december is an interesting time. you lock in with your classes a little bit, but to be honest you haven't cared about grades up until then and you continue not to for the rest of first semester. you start plotting on taylor again, and you kinda go through this weird wannabe model phase. nothing really crazy happens this month. you go to a party and the fit is tuff. oh, and you start talking a bit with someone you've had added on snapchat for a while. hailey. you guys talk here and there throughout december and you're basically leading her on during this time. christmas is lovely, and you get an amazing present. a trip to las vegas.

january 2nd. you adore the trip, as you're going through your brent faiyaz luxury phase, and it turns out to be a great experience. lots of photos and fun memories. you post a whole bunch on instagram. when you get back and the school year starts up again, you're still kinda plotting on taylor. but, hailey sends you a wake up call sort of paragraph that eventually leads you guys to be extremely close. you kinda lock in with her, even though you still fuck around and talk to a lot of women during this month. you also let your feelings get the best of you and make a really stupid decision (i won't say what). by the end of this month, you and hailey are talking a lot and she invites you to her school's sadies dance. you feel kinda obligated to go, as you believe that she deserves a good time with you after all the time she's been loyal to you. february comes around. you're lonely on valentine's day this year but it's okay, you have the chance to text and call hailey.

february 22nd comes around, the day of sadies. you actually had to go through hell and back just to get permission both from your parents and from your school. dad takes you, you arrive, and it's every so slightly awkward at first but that later goes away. you are LOCKED IN. you really believed that confident luxury aesthetic so much that you became it. you had aura. that night was lovely, and this is when you truly become close to her.

you and her are basically in a relationship, just not officially. it's intangible. you guys live an hour away and at least until you're older you can't be together. but you guys are so obsessed with each other that you just have faith that one day you will be together and continue to talk digitally until then. this doesn't happen, as far as i know. oh, i forgot to mention, the reason you start plotting on hailey is because of aaron. you know you've had her added but you don't care about her until you see aaron talking to her. you kinda want to compete with him and prove to yourself that you're better than him so you make an effort to mean more to hailey than aaron does. when you lock in with hailey, things became clear. you realize how bad of a person you were during first semester and you truly understand what nicole meant when she said that aaron was a bad influence. you get it now. he tried to use hailey in a way so now you guys have beef and you seperate yourself from him. the next couple months are all the same in a way. you start to love basketball again, which causes you to decide to move to mesa high for the upcoming school year. up until april, things are smooth. this changes, however, when hailey "breaks up" with you. you guys fall out and stop talking, and because you're gonna be hung up on her, you desperately try to be someone your not. fortunately, this version of you is short-lived. you eventually realize that's just the way things go, but that doesn't make it much better. your heart will be so broken and it will hurt so much that you cry to your mother about it during a late night, something you thought you'd never do.

eventually though, things will be alright. you wrap up freshman year at heritage with good grades. oh and you're now like best friends with levi and rudy. lovely people. summer break starts, you attend basketball camp at mesa high, and you still think about hailey every once in a while. you actually write her a text 2 months after not talking, you chat for a tiny bit, and for fun you send her an 8 ball game. she doesn't respond. but it's okay. part of you didn't want her to respond in the first place. things are okay this way. the rest of summer break is chill, no stress whatsoever. you talked to annie from heritage for a while but you don't have any intention to take things anywhere. you're okay not being in a relationship right now. your summer break is about to end, and school will start up again. things will be different soon, but for now..

everything is as it should be.