#and if i can swing it i'll be a civil servant
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I just spent like 20 minutes thinking about soup
#i need to move out!!!!#i love my parents to be clear they're great#i just want to be in charge of my own meals again#it's not that they're bad at feeding me stuff i want to eat it's just we like different things#when it's just me i can make my soup however i want and no one's gonna say anything#Because It's My Soup#i can eat japanese chicken curry for a week straight! no one cares!#i just need to get better at eating vegetables#i want my own kitchen soooo baaad.....#my mom's sensitive to garlic. do you know how much recipes fuck if you add garlic? severely. and i can't if she's gonna eat it#i need my own kitchen so bad so so bad pleeaase#really hoping that i get my degree within like two months#and then i have to. urgh. find a job. but then i find a job and i go there#and i get Paid! money!#and once i have some money in the bank and a long term job i can try and get a flat#and once i have a flat i have my own kitchen i can order stuff online if i want and i can adopt a cat#i can have friends over i can decorate#and if i can swing it i'll be a civil servant#and if i'm lucky enough i can perhaps. give up the next 30 years of my life to a bank so i can own my own flat#god i hope. i fucking hope. i really really want to own#like not for landlord bullshit. just so i don't have to worry about where to go in a year two years five years#i want a civil servant job because that's for life and i would love to do the same thing forever#and i want to own a flat because i could make the space fit my needs and wants perfectly#and i wouldn't have to worry about where to live or old age or whatever#good luck to me finding a well situated 2 bedroom flat in one of the if not the worst city of france in terms of housing :)#but hey i've been lucky in life. maybe it'll keep going#i know what i want early! that's good#i shouldn't have a realisation that i want kids at 30yo or whatever. I Shall Not Become My Mom#ANYWAY i need my own kitchen!!!!!#wow i have a ramble tag now
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The Tower, Pt. 14
After having learned of Otho's true colours, Sheppard and Beckett are escorted to what appears to be a holding cell where Tavius is already held up as a prisoner. The soldiers or members of the Lord Protector's guard shove both men into the room, Beckett and Sheppard each having one hand twisted behind their backs. Where Beckett slides across the floor, Sheppard's momentum carries him to the very back of the room but he stays on his feet, if only barely, seeming to awkwardly hold onto his dignity. Having regained his balance, Sheppard makes to project nonchalance, as though he meant to do that. He had meant to amble into the room in a relaxed half-run, just barely managing to stay on his feet. He is so over this whole betrayal, tell him something else that he does not know. No, really, tell him. He wants to know what the hell is going on.
Otho: Wait outside! Tavius: I'll have your head for this, Chamberlain. Otho: You are in no position to make threats.
Otho orders the soldiers to wait outside because he clearly has something to say that is not for their ears, and explaining what Tavius, the son and heir of the Lord Protector, next in the line of succession for the throne and the control chair, is doing being held captive seems to be on the top of that list. He even makes sure to check that the guards won't be able to overhear, as their loyalty seems to be for the royal bloodline, for the person that is able to control the chair and the drones that protect their planet from the wraith.
Like Sheppard, Tavius seems to be projecting nonchalance that he does not actually feel by chilling down on a sofa as though he was not being held against his will at all, as though he meant to be laying down on this couch. His station puts him above these mundane proceedings like being the object of someone's coup and grab for power, like he can barely be bothered to be held captive by the Chamberlain. It is all so very droll, a civil servant thinking they can constrain his freedom.
Tavius manages to sound bored even as he threatens to repay Otho for his audacity, for his presumption that he will be able to hold the rightful ruler of this land prisoner to his machinations. He may be currently Otho's captive but only because he chooses to be. That is the kind of discreet aristocratic charm that he is currently projecting. And as Sheppard turns to face their captor, a relaxed but defiant swing to his arms, he is projecting the exact same thing. All three men that are now held captive by Otho have the authentic Ancient gene in them, and that seems to be precisely why Otho has gathered them all up for imprisonment.
Tavius: Is it really necessary to insult me further by imprisoning me with these people? Beckett: We're not the ones who committed murder. Tavius: True! There is only one murderer in this room. Isn't that right, Otho? Oh, let me guess. He told you I did it. Do I look like the sort of person...
Tavius has a flair for the dramatic and just as soon as Beckett voices his disdain toward whom he believes to be the person responsible for the death of the Lord Protector, Tavius springs up from his comfortable position down on the couch to give a theatrical performance of the injustice that has been done to his character, and although he is responding to Beckett and is saying things that he knows are known to both himself and to Otho, he seems to be giving this performance to Sheppard in particular. It is Sheppard, his conversation partner from the table of the evening meal of the previous night that he wishes to convince of his innocence in the matter. It is Sheppard, the man that his father had invited to their table, that Tavius sees as the only person in the room that is deserving of this clearing of his good name.
Tavius is an aristocrat, he is an elitist, and hence he feels like this whole play for power that has been his birthright his whole life is beneath him. He finds what Otho is doing crass and discourteous, and he certainly seems to feel like he is doing Beckett a favour by even bothering to explain the actual state of affairs to him. As far as he knows, or even cares, Beckett is a servant that had been invited to tend to his father, barely even deserving a clarification. He does not care what Beckett thinks of him. With Sheppard, he is less certain. He is not sure what to make of Sheppard, but he at least seems like a contender to his right to rule. For Sheppard, he seems to feel the need to clarify things. To put the record straight, as it were. And it is hilarious how Sheppard is pretending to be just as over and beyond this whole imprisonment business as Tavius, making a show of inspecting the curtains, looking behind the curtain at the back of the room while Beckett and Tavius are engaged in this conversation.
We may also note that Sheppard lets his hand drop and takes a step toward him as Tavius raises his brow and says "These people" with a tone that seems to contain some implied meaning that casts some aspersions on their character, and while Tavius' meaning probably had more than a little to do with their station or lack thereof, it is also possible for Sheppard to have heard something else being implied, especially as his station is not something that concerns Sheppard personally. But it is possible he has had these words hurled at himself in some other context before, and he certainly does not enjoy hearing them hurled at other people. He hears the disdain in the man's tone even if he does not fully understand the root cause for it, and so he takes a step forward, comes to take a stand next to Beckett to communicate to Tavius just where his place is in all of this. But we may also note that even as he takes a step to stand closer to Beckett, to Tavius himself, toward the centre of the room, he also turns his body away from all of them at the same time, because he does not want to have his body facing any of these people. He is not open to any of these people but instead turns himself away from them and what ever is going on in the room, communicating his discomfort with the proceedings.
In fact, because he does not seem to be sure who is wanting to throw down with whom since there seem to be "fightin' words" thrown about all over the place, Sheppard may take his step to be closer to the centre of the action but at the same time we may note that he does not place his body between Beckett and the other men. He very pointedly does not do this, even though he is not just responsible for keeping Beckett safe as the chief physician of Atlantis but as a man that he had personally invited to make this house call and placed him in this danger that he is currently in. He is concerned for Beckett, to be sure, but it seems like the most he is preparing to do is to shove the good doctor out of the way if the going gets tough. He is not inviting Beckett to get behind him.
And not only can we be fairly certain that he would have placed his own body between McKay and danger the way he has before if he was now here instead of Beckett, because we know that he would very likely defeat all the others in hand-to-hand combat, but the one thing even now that is keeping him from killing one or both of the hostile natives in this situation seems to be that he still does not know where McKay is and what has become of him. It seems to him like the safest thing he can do at the moment is to wait to see how things play out until he either hears from McKay or figures out some way to get to him, even if it requires him to check behind each and every curtain in the Tower to find his way down to the catacombs himself.
Tavius: ...who knows anything about poisons and chemicals? Otho, on the other hand, is always making elaborate studies of things -- topics you and I might find boring, but which sometimes can turn out to be quite useful. Beckett: You're saying that he's the one that poisoned the Lord Protector? Otho: I had no choice. I offered to guarantee him the succession. In return, he would spare Mara's life.
And so the scheme is revealed. While Tavius takes no responsibility for Otho having poisoned the Lord Protector, the latter makes it seem as though he had done it at the behest of Tavius. Almost certainly Otho had physically done the poisoning but whether he had been doing it to make Tavius get his birthright faster than he would under normal circumstances or not is unclear.
What is important is this: Otho at least makes it sound as though he had done all of it for Mara, he had done all of it for love. He had been forced by capricious Tavius into poisoning the Lord Protector to protect Mara's life. But also note that Otho tells them that he had offered to guarantee Tavius his (rightful) succession implying that it had been Otho that approached Tavius with his own schemes, for his own purposes. Whether he was motivated by his love for Mara or for power is anyone's guess. It is entirely possible he mentions sparing Mara's life here only because he thinks it will make Sheppard sympathetic to his cause in case the gene therapy does not work and it turned out he would need to use him later. Regardless, Otho makes it sound like their original deal had been "Spare Mara's life and I will make you Lord Protector" and the extent of Tavius' involvement with the plot may have been a simple "Sure".
Tavius mentions both poisons and chemicals, which may have some bearing on what kind of schemes Otho had been spinning, and in addition to love potions, he may also know of potions to both increase and decrease fertility. At the very least his scheme seemed to require for Mara to not bear children and for Tavius to generate children, and they both may have needed chemical assistance in this. But it is striking that he mentions this specifically to Beckett as something "you and I might find boring" when the pharmacochemical properties of plants native to Pegasus might actually really fascinate him. This serves to display Tavius' condescension and his disregard for Beckett as a person, how little interest he has in getting to know him. The entire purpose of his speech is to villainize Otho, not to bond with the Earthlings. And again we may note that the way Tavius describes Otho might be used to describe McKay as well. He too might make elaborate studies of things most people might find boring but which may come useful.
Tavius: Ah, how could you be leaving out the best part? Once I assumed the throne, Mara was to be given to Otho as his wife. All she had to do was bat her eyes at him a couple of times, and the fool was hooked. Otho: Guards! It's true we were to be married...
Although there is no love lost between Tavius and his sister, it does not seem like he actually had any designs for her life. He seems to have been willing to give her hand in marriage to the Chamberlain which, given that Otho does not have the gene, probably would have guaranteed that she would never have children that would threaten his rule. Again it is difficult to say what Otho's genuine feelings for Mara are. It could be he is deeply in love with her, it could be that she is only a means for him to attain power of anything in between. Certainly neither of these two drama queens chewing up scenery seem entirely straight, and Otho slapping Tavius instead of punching or backhanding him makes him seem effeminate and unaccustomed to physical altercations. He is flamboyant but it is also possible that he does love her and would therefore resent Sheppard, especially if Mara had gone to him out of her father's suggestion rather than his own.
Tavius, on the other hand, takes the slap like a man and because of the parallels drawn between him and McKay, it raises the question of whether this is the first time that someone has laid a hand on him or whether his father's resentment, as seen in their interactions earlier, may also have manifested in physical violence when the boy was younger. Although he dresses like a dandy, Tavius does not seem to be a nancy even if there is a case to be made for him to prefer the company of men. What is more, he seems to feel contempt for the other man's weakness for women's wiles, and it is curious that akin to how he had just disregarded Beckett's potential interest in poisons and chemicals earlier, the implication here is that he is likewise ignorant of Sheppard having similarly fallen victim to the batting of her eyes, which she had literally done to him after coming to his room. For one, it gives her agency and makes her seem less like an innocent victim in all of this. All three of them were making plays to get power, and it is the downside of a monarchic system of government that power can only be wielded by one person.
We see that Sheppard takes another step forward as Otho says "He would spare Mara's life" but it is possible that what motivates Sheppard stepping forward is not the mention of Mara but of Otho himself taking a step toward Tavius, possibly in anticipation of him throwing down because Tavius is obviously purposefully provoking him. And Sheppard seems correct in his assessment since Otho does then get physical with Tavius. But in spite of taking that step forward, Sheppard makes no move to get involved and he still does not even put himself between the men and Beckett, let alone that him stepping forward had anything at all with wanting to protect Mara. For one, it does not seem like Mara is in any need of protection and can take care of herself, and it seems like Otho feels like it is his duty to keep her safe, he is the one worried about her... virtue. Her good name. There is no need for Sheppard to get involved in all that.
Otho: ...and so we will. Only now she won't be marrying a lowly servant, but the Lord Protector himself. Beckett: I really need to stop making house calls.
Otho turns on his heels and flounces off theatrically, and it is still not clear whether his intention on marrying Mara is because he is in love with her and feels more comfortable marrying her now that he has some power, has something to offer her other than the life of a lowly servant, or that he is using his marriage to her to legitimize his rule in the eyes of the old regime. Regardless, we see Sheppard lift up his brow in a derisive way as he takes off, and while with some stretch of the imagination one might interpret this as communicating "sour grapes," the more likely interpretation is that he is actually agreeing with Tavius' assessment of Otho as a fool. And while it is partially connected to Mara since she had been the topic of conversation, partially it is also in reaction to him claiming the title of Lord Protector, Sheppard's eyebrow seeming to communicate some iteration of "la-di-da". He is done with this whole entire planet.
But let us make note of this: Sheppard does not say one word during this entire scene. He has nothing to say. This does not concern him. He has just had his radio removed from him, and he is cut away from even looking for McKay. Sheppard's mind is occupied with another problem entirely, and just like we have seen him do multiple times with the Genii, Sheppard keeps himself from needlessly antagonizing or provoking sociopaths when he does not know that McKay is safe. He is not going to quip at some clearly unstable person holding all the cards just to make himself feel better when someone else might end up paying for his actions. People see Sheppard as a wisecracking hero but he never does it needlessly, there is always a purpose to his wisecracking, he is doing it to some end. And when he thinks it is better to fly under the radar and not draw attention to the thing that makes him weak, the one person he cannot live without, he would rather stay quiet.
Baldric: You said these weapons have great destructive power? McKay: Yes. Baldric: What do you intend to do with it? McKay: Blow a hole straight up to the surface -- assuming I can get it to fly in a straight line.
Meanwhile McKay seems to be either performing surgery or giving an intimate examination to one of the drones while his trusty local guide observes him keenly, his continuous stream of questions signalling both his interest and his keen mind. What McKay has his hands on is a projectile weapon, a incredibly powerful projectile weapon like he had pointed out earlier, and like we have noted many times before, weapons tend to be phallic in shape and function. And this particular scene seems to contain more than a little innuendo even though, as ever, McKay himself seems oblivious to it. For one, he is talking about blowing something to get out of their current predicament, which certainly is what one would do with a drone. But he further worries about his ability to fly in a straight line, which we have seen him have trouble with before. And while he does get his weapon to penetrate the ground, straight is not precisely the way one might describe the trajectory.
McKay: I've never actually done anything like this before. Baldric: What will happen if you succeed? McKay: Well, two possibilities. Either we create a nice sturdy shaft that will give us some much-needed air and provide a big enough gap for the radio signal to get through, or it will bring the already unsteady ceiling down on us, burying us both alive.
While he is not currently under thousands of cubit tonnes of water, McKay's predicament here is not entirely different from his recent trouble at the bottom of the ocean. He has slightly more space here and he may not be as cold, and his companion has more questions than comments, although he is not necessarily less aggravating to listen to while he is working than Carter had been (although it is also possible the youth's constant questioning is actually reminding him of Sheppard and hence even able to make working feel easier for him, even if he sounds exasperated explaining things). But similar to then, it seems like they are running out of air and he fears there is a chance they will be buried alive, and it does not matter to him if he has water or earth bearing down on him, he would rather not be buried alive by anything.
But let us also make note of the fact that his plan here involves him creating a nice sturdy shaft, and not one person invited him to describe blowing a hole in the roof with those words. It seems like he has nice sturdy shafts in his mind, and while he may never have used a drone to blow a hole, he for sure has experience with the raising up and managing of sturdy shafts. McKay needs sturdy shafts like the air that he breathes, we are told.
Baldric: I prefer to imagine the first possibility. McKay: Yes, yes, the power of positive thinking. Very good. While you do that, I will rely on my experience and expertise. Baldric: You said you'd never done this before. McKay: General expertise. Will you be quiet while I do this? Alright.
Baldric confesses to McKay that he prefers to imagine nice sturdy shafts and McKay then tells him that while imagining nice sturdy shafts is all very good, he prefers a hands-on approach to sturdy shafts and although he may not have tried this particular thing before, he does have both experience and expertise in managing shafts.
At the same time, while they made four separate mentions of communications not working between McKay and Sheppard earlier, the power of positive thinking gets a mention here. Both McKay and Sheppard seem to be feeling increasingly anxious and although this may be a simple feature of the time stretching on from when they have last been in contact, it is possible there is also a feedback loop going on, one's anxiety triggering the other's. We may also note that McKay's reference to his general expertise here connects this to Tavius' mention of Otho making elaborate studies of things that might become useful, as it is the elaborate study of things that other people might find boring ("Where did all those Saturday nights go?" he had asked Grodin rhetorically) that has given McKay the expertise he needs to pull this off. But just like Beckett does not find the study of poisons and chemicals boring, Sheppard does not find what McKay does boring any more than his young companion does.
Baldric: I can't believe that worked! McKay: What happened to positive thinking? Baldric: I lied.
McKay takes a risk in launching the drone, not certain of the result but feeling like he has no choice. While he has no Jimeny Crickett with a pixie cut here to tell him that this is a bad idea, what he does here is not categorically different from his plan to swim the jumper to the surface in the previous episode, and this taking of risks is actually something that forms into an issue between Sheppard and McKay. His plan seems to work this time but Baldric's reaction reminds us of how much luck was involved, how it could easily have gone the other way. But such is McKay's need to hear from Sheppard that he is even willing to risk his own life to get in contact with the man, and most of all to listen to him, to hear him speak.
Continued in Pt. 15
#stargate atlantis#john sheppard#sga meta#sheppard is bi#sga#rodney mckay#rodney is gay#mcshep#ep. the tower#ep. grace under pressure
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Round 10, Day 1 - Team Foreigner
The Foreigner drifted upwards. And upwards. Closer and closer to the star. Closer and closer to
Fomalhaut .
Fomalhaut .
Fomalhaut .
"Hello, miss… why did you make my head hurt down there...?"
"This is what we do. And since you're like me, I'll be honest. I don't respond kindly to those who dare defy my precious Emperor's orders, so you should probably get down there and fight. You do that and survive, and we'll talk. Actually, even if you die, I'm sure I can pull some strings. Foreigner to Foreigner."
"…I don't want to die yet. I'm not ready. I want to know more…"
"You're so precious. If you don't want to die, then you should do your best and fight. Good luck, dìdi."
"Imperial Edict. Wage war.": Boosts and demerits will be doubled for the upcoming round, as part of the Imperial Edict!
The strength of Alter-Ego's Noble Phantasm has been increased by the decree!
Damage has the potential to be doubled in combat upon reaching a certain threshold!
Foreigner takes a -4% penalty due to Gunner's Class Trait!
SERVANT DETAILS:
HP: 3/3
Team Foreigner has all 3 Command Spells remaining!
Swing-By (A Rank): A momentum-based skill that assigns a boost to Voyager. This value starts at 1%, and increases by 1% per each victory, and .5% per loss. It remains unchanged if the Masters choose to 'Play Defensively'. This buff is applied whether Voyager is caught off guard or not. (Current value: +6.5%)
Contact with Civilization (D Rank): When fighting in a Free-for-All, he gains a +2% boost. No matter the battle type, if he's encountering a Servant that he hasn't met before, he gains a +2% bonus to his poll results.
Voyager of the Stars (A Rank): When fighting against a Servant with a higher boost than him, gain an additional +2%. Voyager's 'Swing-By' skill is also upgraded, adding an additional .5% bonus to his Swing-By victory boost if he wins in a Free-for-All.
Due to observing Alter-Ego's technique, he gains a +2% bonus against her!
NOBLE PHANTASM: Pale Blue Dot (B+ Rank)
A hopeful Noble Phantasm that boosts allies and demoralizes enemies. Voyager gains a +20% boost, and his enemies take a -10% demerit, and he deals 2 ‘wounds’ instead of one. The next round, Voyager has a +10% boost, and his enemies take a -5% demerit, but only inflicts 1 wound upon victory.
Boost from the Imperial Edict: If the gap between scores is wider than 40%, the Noble Phantasm inflicts 3 wounds rather than 2.
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Class-Trait:
FOREIGNER-CLASS Servants take advantage of the chaos around them. When engaged in a Free-for-All (while not Playing Defensively), all other participants are given a -3% demerit. If attacked while 'Playing Defensively'', their attacker takes a -2% penalty.
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