#and if dick needs to hurt her to see that she’ll allow it

[ghost-bxrd]

I love love love Owl Song, will Cass and the rest of the Batkids appear? And if so, when and how? Bc I want to see Cass and Dick nonverbally bonding ✨

Well, as of now Owl Song is still on track to end with Ethiopia so, probably not >.<

Although I think Dick would be very unnerved by Cass at first. He’s not used to humans being so quiet and communicating with body language alone, so he (rightfully) clocks her as a potential threat at first. Cass obviously recognizes this and would deliberately put herself into situations where she’s vulnerable and Dick would have a very easy time to injure her (similarly to how puppies expose their bellies to other dogs in a “I’m not a threat please accept me as pack” kind of way).

Eventually Dick would relax a little and watch closely if she’s just as docile around his other (squishy) family members. Once he’d ascertain that she’s no threat to any of them he’d tentatively allow her closer to the nest, and after a few days invite her inside for obligatory cuddle sessions by giving her a first coo (opposed to the wary hoots and chitters of before).

Cass fits herself so carefully inside the nest Dick gets impatient and just pulls her into the pile of limbs with a huff.

Dick feels a bit bad about not inviting her earlier because she’s radiating such unbridled joy-soft-love-content-gratefulness he doesn’t know how he could ever assume she’d hurt them. She’s as much a protector as he is.

[am-i-interrupting]

I absolutely love ur work and have an idea that u can use if u want to!!! It's about how Alastor, Lucifer, Rosie, Velvette, Vox, (maybe Carmilla if u want to), and whichever characters u would prefer would react to a fem or gn (whichever u prefer) reader who is has cat-like features and is in heat. tysm!!!!! 💖💖💖💖

Alastor

Well, aren’t you just precious?

He will tease you.

Expect to be let, between the ears, on the ears, your chin, your spine, your tail.

He will be tugging on your tail.

He’s either touching you and doesn’t let you touch him back or you’re allowed to touch him and he won’t touch you.

He loves to watch rut against his thigh or better his boot, mewling with your tail curled around his hand.

When you’re obviously in pain though, he will bring out his shadows and fuck you with them.

Expect degradation.

“So desperate, aren’t you, kitten? And I’m the only one who can satisfy you—“ cue laugh track— “how pathetic.”

Husk

Be prepared to be held down and marked.

Whichever one of you starts the breeding first will quickly cause the other to as well.

He has to mark what’s his.

Just pushes you against the wall randomly one day and rubs his cheek against yours.

That’s your cue to take things somewhere much more private.

That first orgasm happens before the clothes are even off. He just can’t keep his paws off you.

Mating press (obviously)

His arms beneath your legs, holding your hands in his, his wings surrounding you to prevent anyone else from seeing you in your locked, empty room.

Afterwards, locked together, he’s just rubbing his face all over you. His hands go to the base of your tail and he’s just petting there.

Lucifer

You’re gonna have to give this man a warning beforehand or he’s going to be absolutely overwhelmed.

“Shhhh, shhh, baby, it’s okay. You’re okay. I’m not going anywhere.”

Oral King!

When his dick is not recovering, he is giving you oral.

Just licking, lapping, and sucking like the kitten you are.

Constant petting and reassurance.

If you mention anything about kids, he is going to come immediately.

Sorry, did you. . . did you not expect it to end so fast? That’s your fault.

Rosie

Let this woman peg someone!

Strap on! Put her in a strap on! She’d be so hot.

She’d take such good care of you.

Constant pets, a bit of tail pulling, just worshiping you.

“You’re doing so good, kitten. We’re gonna make such pretty babes.”

Let’s you scent mark her.

She might direct you to her breasts.

If you suck on them, she’s shiver and praise you, petting between your ears the entire time.

Vaggie

She would have done research beforehand.

Your not just scent marking her, she’s doing it back to the best of her abilities.

Whether she’s sinking down on or rocking into you, she’s got her hand on your ears or tail.

If your tail curls around her wrist, she’s gently holding it the entire time.

She’s just whispering sweet nothings to you.

Whatever you need to hear, she’s saying it.

At the end of it all, expect her to clean you up.

A bath where you just lay on her. Her drying and brushing your fur.

You can lean on her as much as you want, she’ll be there to support you.

Velvette

Absolutely thrilled by how needy for her you are.

She might not let you scent mark her depending on how demanding you are. You have to earn the right to claim her.

She’s pulling on your tail, hard. It kind of hurts.

She’s teasing you relentlessly, both physically and mentally.

Barely there touches.

“Aw, you came just from that? How fucking pathetic is that? I didn’t really touch you.”

Vox

Recording this as blackmail for later.

Well, not blackmail more so, proof that he can dom you so well.

Your fur might be just a little bit singed at the end of it. Just like a tiny bit.

He’s electric, what can he say?

He is petting you and praising you.

A constant hand moving through your fur.

He’s not letting you out of his reach.

He’ll sit back and let you scent mark him as much as you want.

He’s putting his hand over and stroking your scent glands so carefully.

“Don’t worry, baby, I’ll give you just what you need.”

[oreolemur]

Useless Wife- Naoya Zenin Fanfic

Forced into marriage, you found it hard to bond with your new husband. His clan praised you for your beauty. You were the most beautiful trade a man could ask for. Your marriage with Naoya was forced, however, needed. Your clan and his, bumped heads for generations, and it was time to put an end to it.

The wedding was tense as your family and his, didn’t say a word. The honeymoon was awful, having been taunted by Naoya due to your lack of experience. “At least your pretty face makes up for your pathetic attempts to please me”, he said. He was always controlling, often forcing you to be subservient and quiet. As a woman, it was your job. As a wife, he made sure you were obedient. “Speak when spoken to”, he ingrained into your head. You’ve only been beaten twice, leaving you bloody and bruised. You tried to be brave and step up, but Naoya was stronger and bigger. He grew tired of you after a year. He no longer looked to you for sexual needs, only treating you as a special maid he shared a bed with, if you got lucky. 

Your servants’ cries filled the estate. They were your husband’s toys. It didn’t surprise you to walk into a room and see him rape their helpless souls. You didn’t dare to protect them, feeling useless and weak. Although he stopped fucking you, his hands still touched you. “What kind of woman are you? You’re a shit cook and can’t even suck a dick right”. Whenever you failed, he hit you. Whenever he saw you, your face became wet with his spit. He treated you like trash, not caring about your well being. 

Informing his father about his behavior was pointless. Naoya was just like Naobito, but less drunk. “He abuses me”, you said. “What are you doing wrong for him to act this way?”, he responded. As a father, he never scolded Naoya for neglecting you. Naobito only complained when an heir came into question. “Have you tried for children yet?”. Naoya’s response remained the same, “Her body refuses to bear a child”. He blamed you for the loss of your first child. You were 8 weeks in when you miscarried. Naoya saw that as a way to get back at him, so he beat you for it.

Your status as a wife was mocked. All the women in the clan made fun of you for allowing your husband to sleep with others. “A pretty face is all she’ll ever be”, they gossiped. You were alone. No one had your back, and you were sick of it. You wanted to prove to Naoya that you were worthy and can offer more. Hearing your servants cry was enough to make you upset. He was your husband and it was time he started seeing you as his wife again.

In your room, you waited. You spent the whole day preparing for your talk. You had a gut feeling he wasn’t going to listen, but you didn’t let that stop you from what you wanted. You constantly shifted from one spot to the other. “Breathe. Breathe”, you took deep breaths, hearing his footsteps get closer. You quickly sat on the edge of the bed, fixing your nightgown. Sliding the door open, Naoya entered, oblivious to your presence. He poured himself a glass of wine, chugging down shot after shot.

“N-Naoya”, you whispered. “C-can I-”. “No”, he interrupted. With his back still facing you, you decided to try again. “We need to talk”. He slammed the bottle down, sighing. “I want us to be a couple. I am your wife, therefore, I should be the only woman you-”. Glass scattered on the floor, having been thrown by Naoya. His hands were bloody as he looked at you. “Are you telling me what to do?”. You gulped as you tried to keep your composure. “N-no, I just want to be more useful to you”. He titled his head, staring at you with annoyance. “Useful? How can something be useful when it’s already proven to be useless?”.

His words hurt, causing you to shed a tear,“But I-”. He broke another glass, making him bleed even more. “Shut up!”, he shouted. Naoya poured alcohol on his hand, tending to his wound. You saw where this conversation was going, however, you weren’t finished with what you had to say. “They mock me and it’s all your fault. You’re unfaithful, yet you blame me. It’s not my fault you’re a whore”. The room fell silent. Naoya slowly turned around. His gaze was sinful, his eyes dark, and his intentions impure. He approached you, staring into your eyes. 

“Stand up”. You got on your feet, eyes facing his chest. He undid his robe, keeping his attention on you. Letting his robe fall, he caressed your face. “You’re right. I haven’t been a good husband”. Leaning in, he kissed your lips. You were shocked by his actions, expecting something worse. “I want to make love to you”. He took your nightgown off, proceeding to rub his hands throughout your body. His touch made you flutter. “Lay down”. Getting on the bed, Naoya gestured for you to lay on your stomach.

He grabbed your ankles, pulling you closer to him. You gasped, feeling his cock graze against your bottom. He spat on his hand, lubing up his member. Spreading your cheeks, he placed himself near your anus. He pushed himself, failing the first time. “Why are you doing it back there?”, you asked. He shushed you, adding more spit. Trying again, he still wasn’t successful. “I don’t think you’ll-”, your mouth fell open, stopping mid-sentence. Naoya rammed himself inside, grunting at how tight you were. Blood leaked out, traveling down your inner thigh. The pain left you speechless, tears forming in your eyes. 

He took hold of your waist, making sure every inch of him was in you. He thrusted hard, pausing between each hit. “Not bad”, he began to keep a rhythmic pace. Small whimpers left your lips as you begged. “I-it hurts”, you whispered. “Please take it out”. He chuckled, “You wanted this, but can’t take me. How pathetic”. He grabbed your hair, yanking your head back. You reached for his wrist, pleading for him to let go. He pulled out, pushing you back down. Scooting you up, he got on top of you, putting himself back in. 

Naoya was sadistic, shoving your head into the pillow. He rested his head on your shoulder, lifting it up some to bite you. He heard you scream, sinking his teeth in harder. Marking you, he felt his orgasm coming. “Fuck!”, he grunted. He let go of your hair, arching your back. Digging his nails into your soft skin, he spilled his load into you.

Getting up, he smacked your ass in satisfaction. He poured himself another drink, looking back at you. “Aw, don’t look so down. At least you got what you wanted”, he smiled. Glancing over at a lit candle, he picked it up, walking back to the bed. He traced your figure with his eyes, admiring the patterns his teeth made. “Did you enjoy yourself?”. You stayed silent, not able to move your lips. Naoya clenched his jaw, dripping hot wax on your back. “Answer me when I’m talking to you”. Wincing, you moved away from him.

He put his drink down, drawing his attention back to you. “Did I say I was finished?”. Flipping you over, he pried your legs apart, rubbing his tip against your clit. You twitched at the sensation, accidently moaning. Naoya was surprised by your reaction, doing it more. “I’ll ask you again. Did you enjoy yourself?”. You looked at him and lied,”Yes”. He smirked, shoving himself into your pussy. Moaning again, you covered your face. Your husband grabbed your arms, pinning them above your head. “Your pretty face turns me on when I fuck you”.

He kissed your cheeks, then your lips, and down to your neck. He sucked the flesh, leaving bruises. Your bodies stuck together like glue, feeling more connected than ever. You questioned whether or not you enjoyed it. You knew it was wrong, knowing that you were raped, but you craved his touch for so long, you began to like it. “If you want to make yourself useful”, he paused, looking into your eyes. “Then give me a son”.

[forsungie]

pairings. park jisung x female reader

genre. mature content

warnings. expect grammatical errors, needy jisung, oral (female receiving), hair pulling, cum eating

author’s note. full english smut since madaming nagrerequest... here we go :D

you’ve been studying for your midterms for hours, but your mind doesn’t seem to be working and you’re very frustrated by it. while your boyfriend—jisung, seems to be really bored watching you read your notes for the nth time. the man keeps rolling around in your bed mainly since he got bored watching movies on your tv and has nothing to do on his phone. you didn’t even invite or ask him—he invited himself to your house because he wanted to, and he promised not to bother you while you were studying for exams, so you agreed.

“are you done?” he asked, impatiently waiting for you to be done.

you shooked your head without even looking at the man who’s now pouting because of the lack of attention.

“you’ve been reading for hours, you should take a break! you’re going to hurt your eyes,” he added.

you shook your head again in response and immediately continued what you were doing.

the room was quiet for a few minutes which made you happy because you assumed that the young man had fallen asleep while waiting for you. jisung has already finished the plates he was supposed to do, so he has plenty of time to mess with you now. in fact, he was supposed to hang out with his friends, but he refused because he insisted on watching you review for your exam.

you looked over at the young man for the first time to see if he was truly asleep, and you were surprised when he met your gaze. he’s still staring at you while lying on your bed.

“what’s with your face? i thought you wanted to watch me review for exams,” you teased.

“you should’ve just joined your friends if—”

“you’re taking too long, your attention is what i want, love,” he whined.

“are you done? can i have your attention now?” he moved closer to you and proceed to play with your hand.

“why are you so clingy today, mhm?” you giggled when he lightly pull you to the bed.

he sat at the foot of the bed, allowing you to straddle his lap. you’re only wearing an oversized hoodie that is obviously jisung’s and just a panty. you didn’t bother wearing a bra and shorts anymore since it’s just you and your mom living in the house.

“ji, we can’t, mom can hear us.”

“see! you’re too focused on studying to the point that you didn’t hear your mom,” he scolded, “she said she’ll be going to the grocery with her friend.”

you giggled, “i’m sorry, okay? you know i need to get higher grades this time since i’m not satisfied with my performance last semester,” you stated with a sigh.

“love... i didn’t tell you to not study, did i? my point is you shouldn’t push yourself too much, you can take a break in between you know,” he said while tucking the strands of your hair behind your ears.

you smiled and saluted jokingly, “yes, sir.”

“good. now, kiss me,” he said and grabbed your nape to kiss you.

you smiled through the kiss and pulled away, “make out break?”

jisung chuckled, “make out break.”

make out break that turned into oral sex. of course it’s jisung, this man is tempting as hell and you can’t help but give in. and it’s impossible for jisung to not eat you out when you taste so sweet for him. he always seems to be thirsty for your juice. he loves eating you out. he loves having you come on his face especially when you squirt.

he moaned as you gently pulled his hair which made the young man’s dick even harder than before. he definitely loves it when you pull his hair out of pleasure that he’s giving you.

“fuck, you taste so good, i can’t get enough of you...”

“so fucking sweet... mhm...”

“want your juices on my face, please...”

jisung’s moans and groans is like music to your ears. you enjoy hearing him moan and say nasty things while eating you out, it makes him even hotter.

“need your fingers, ji...” you moaned while palming your own breasts.

“yeah? my girl’s so greedy, isn’t she? but since you’ve been studying really hard, i think you deserve it,” he inserted two fingers inside your hole while his plump pink lips is sucking your clit.

he keeps pumping his fingers inside you while he watch you play with your nipples, caressing and pinching them. your hands are back on jisung’s blue hair—tugging it when you felt like you’re about to come.

when you calm down from your orgasm, instead of cleaning your juices with tissues, jisung licked and swallowed them dry. even if jisung wanted to stuff his cock inside you, he felt like you needed rest so he laid you down on your bed properly and cuddled you to sleep.

“i can’t sleep, i still need to study—”

“just take a nap and then i’ll help you study later... what about that?” he asked.

you smiled and nodded, leaving a kiss on his cheek before closing your eyes, letting your sleepiness take you.

[kibblbread]

This is completely aimless and scattered, like more than usual but whatever. Either way it’s just relationship dynamic stuff~ btw pls read the fucking pizza gorl fic —>>> 🍕✨

Random thought but i think exposure therapy might be the best option in aiding Jason to recovery, well, that and gentle coaxing! Jason is very responsive to praise because he’s definitely a people pleaser. I know it might be hard to tell looking at him from a glance; but let’s not be shallow, he gives chance after chance to his loved ones no matter how much they screw him over. He’s simply a lover boy. So I conclude that Jason is a huge people pleaser, and he’s privy to it but ignores himself. He hates digging into his psyche.. it just hurts, poor guy has too many painful memories.

But it’s necessary for healing unfortunately 😔

AK!Jason is extremely.. emotionally.. wrecked. He doesn’t act outside his redhood persona often unless it’s completely necessary— like getting food and supplies, or even to possibly get intel.

At least for a while.

Meeting PG turns his entire world on its head! He’s pretty out of his element as it is while trying to define his persona, the redhood. But PG! Hoo boy— he did not anticipate a partner in crime. A sidekick if you will lol. So essentially his healing process is expedited(just a tad bit); since Jason interacts with his family at a much faster pace than otherwise on his own terms. Dick is very eager to give his younger brother the much needed affection and support that JT deserves but doesn’t want to scare Jason away. So early in the rekindling process, Dick takes a backseat and lets Barbara lead— she’s the voice for not only herself, but Dick & Tim even Alfred for a bit too. Babs knows just what to say and how to say it more often than not! Jason is more relaxed around her than any of his family for a time.

JT’s attitude is still pretty rotten though, he’s suffering so there’s still so much happening within him that slows them down in regaining his trust.

He’ll still snap & even become aggressive toward Barbara if she isn’t cautious and calculated in her approach, which she is, but she’s not a mind reader and can trigger the worst in Jason. However, on the other side of the spectrum, we have pizza. PG seems to never catch any lip, and if she does it doesn’t seem intentional most times— genuine underestimation is the biggest culprit. PG can be reckless, it’s the largest pain point in the fic between these two imo! But you’re not from gotham, you’re truly ignorant, you’re like a second chance to him almost. You don’t know of his sins, not really anyway… A slate as clean as yourself, he’s gotta prove to you he’s not a useless, unworthy, sorry excuse for a person right? He’s gotta prove it to you.

To his family.

To gotham.

No, he doesn’t. But if we are gonna play this game he proved it when he put on his life on the line once as robin, and a second time the moment he decided to become redhood. He’s no less worthy than anyone in reality. Hopefully he’ll see it in this lifetime, but even if he doesn’t, it doesn’t change how you see him and continue to see him. It most definitely doesn’t change how you make him feel either. 🥰 PG is a protective person at heart. She’ll do what she can to help just about any decent human being but especially her loved ones.

Jason sees it. He can feel it too, subconsciously he wants what she wants for him. So he’ll allow her to poke and prod him where he needs to be directed. JT allows a lot from PG actually, from her quick gentle touches to her quips and questioning. He doesn’t take it the same from any of the other bats, when it’s from family it’s nothing short of condescending. Humiliation and anger rises bubbles from his gut straight into his heart. But from you? It’s not something he can quite name.. sometimes it’s annoying, yes, but with you he doesn’t mind feeling insecure as much. You don’t know what insecurity looks like on him just yet so naturally he allows you to suggest things he wouldn’t otherwise acknowledge. The dialogue between you two is allowed to flow freely. To not know Jason’s trigger’s is to not know his anger; which is arguably both a pro and a con.

The closer PG gets to JT the more she sees what he’s capable of.. and how. The why is what she’ll inevitably get to, but how she gets to his truth is much more important. I think PG not being afraid of how Jason will react is her biggest advantage in being so close to him. On the reverse side of things, Jason is more calm because to him, she not antagonistic in his mind. She doesn’t know his past or the extent of JT’s capabilities so why would she, and even if she did, could she? Again I feel JT genuinely underestimates PG as she is a civilian and not held to his impossible self imposed standards. It’s not malicious, he just wants to protect her, his guard is lower than usual which isn’t saying a lot because it’s still extremely high. JT is still distrustful don’t get me wrong, but it’s not personal like it is with his family.

When you tell J he did good, that he’s accomplished something, he’s on the moon. PG’s acknowledgment goes such a long way in the never ending void that is his insecurity and self loathing!

On a less abstract level, when it comes to doing, Jason unintentionally gives PG the go ahead to start pushing his buttons when he inevitably begins clinging to her presence for comfort. For better or for worse, you push many buttons. lol.

“Stay here a bit longer?” Fine, what’s a bit longer?

“Call for back up! We need help!” Im good enough for the job, but maybe some help would be better than none in this instance…

*looks around Jason’s safe house* “Damn bitch you live like this??? Sleepover at my place😝” *complies but serves the most bombastic of side eyes*

The batfam get to see parts of him they haven’t seen before, or at least in a very long time when you two interact in front of them. Jason is still largely argumentative, but thats how it stays surprisingly, he doesn’t boil over and actually backs down or bites his tongue. Which is.. shocking to say the least. Dick & Babs take note of the more true extent of his patience and how willingly he’ll hear your suggestions. They’ll take note of how freely you grab his hand and drag him along. They even notice him suspiciously looking in your direction for prolonged periods while your back is turned. Hmmm very note worthy indeed. Jason is all too aware but doesn’t know what he can do about without you noticing his clear change in demeanor. But quite a few of his new habits fly under his own radar when it comes to being around PG!

He’s less jumpy for one.

Jason isn’t at all more confident in his abilities since he’s still crippled with anxiety and a lot of self doubt but, he’s really focusing on monitoring and guiding you. JT is teaching you to work smarter, teaching you how the streets of gotham work. And above all else making sure PG can keep herself safe! He’s firm and direct, sometimes even sounding like the commander of a militia 🤭 I like to think sometimes he reverts accidentally. Jason also tends to stay close to PG. Most times it’s unintentional but others he’s just watching out for you. You give him a lot of good vibes and reassurance and JT just naturally finds himself hovering over to where you are. Like him and D are side by side on a rooftop, then all the sudden he’s breathing down your neck because you decided sitting on the ledge of a building was cool like a dumbass. But the most notable of all these habits is how much he allows your touch; JT doesn’t squirm away from you either, he stays put. PG will touch his shoulder in gentle support or give his hand a quick tap to pull his attention.

Barbara finds this behavior interesting, Dick thinks it’s adorable but is lowkey in his feelings about it.

Lol

I think thats it for now…

thank u for reading my post bestie 🍕🤪

[confusedgoldenflower]

MIZU x AKEMI x TAKAYOSHI

I except nothing less. Taigen is allowed IF AND ONLY IF he mans the fuck up, doesn’t get butthurt over Mizu and grows.

Akemi and Mizu, if they get a man, need a real man, not a man child clinging to falsities his daddy and master told him. He’s obnoxious. He’s a good, loyal but annoying friend at best as it stands. They’re not compatible romantically/sexually (if memory serves, the flashbacks of nonexistent dick Mikio overlapped w her time w Taigen/some scenes that could be read as romantic, a man who caused her great hurt who made it so she’ll likely need a LOT to be able to be vulnerable w a man ever again), neither is he with Akemi anymore. I’m hoping the overlap was just there to show her starting to think about it or as a weird red herring for his bi/gay awakening. He could get someone else in S2, who knows. As S1 is, they don’t deserve each other. The throuple. Mizu and Akemi as a pair with some more development, but not w him.

Takayoshi, however, has shown that he can be understanding and he should be a trained swordsman. He didn’t seem to mind allowing Akemi to lead and there’s a big hint that she’ll be the “pants wearer” of the relationship going forward. I think Akemi’s moved on from Taigen, maybe not realizing it but has, and Taka also has a pretty significant “fault” being his stutter.

I just see more potential with Taka not Tai.

Having throuple representation would be incredible regardless!

But bringing in a new character for it could also really work. Like a gentle lady Mizu finds in England—oh, that’s an idea…👀👀 no I have enough fanfic wips damnit. She could free someone from a work house or mine!

[danni-k]

Saving Grace

TW: domestic violence(physical and verbal), weapons mention and sexual acts mentioned

“So how she tastes?” Ran teased as his brother made it up the stairs to the office space. Rolling his eyes Rindou walked past his brother towards his office. He knew he was going to give him hell when he looked up after kissing her and saw him on the balcony. With his brother following behind him into his office he called back, “Suck my dick.” Laughing at his younger brother Ran quipped, “From the looks of it, she’ll be glad to do it.”

“Shut up. I don’t know why I even did it.” He said while laying on the couch. Yes he like her but he wasn’t the type to steal a girl away. Besides they were friends and now he went and complicated things. The fact that he could still smell her perfume on the couch from when she was studying earlier did not help. Neither was Ran as he was making himself at home by pouring a drink from his personal stash.

“Because you’re a cheat and wanted to get to her before me.” Rindou rolled over turning his back Tk his brother.

“She has a boyfriend.”

“Yeah and mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell.” Ran replied taking a sip of his drink.

“What?!” He said sitting up from the couch.

“I thought we were spouting useless knowledge.” Why would he bring that up? Her having a boyfriend isn’t useless. It’s probably the one thing keeping her safe. Flopping back down on the couch he covered his head with a pillow muffling, “You’re insufferable.”

Laughing Ran looked out the window which caused his face to fall stating,“And you need to go outside.”

“It’s fucking raining.”

“Haitani go outside.” Hearing the seriousness in his brother’s voice caused him to sit up again and look toward the window.

Spinning around in the chair you see your boyfriend walking towards you, grabbing your things you go to meet him hugging him in the process,“You weren’t at the cafe I got worried.” Your boyfriend said while kissing your forehead. You were supposed to be studying at the cafe a block away but when you saw they were closed you decided to come down to the bar after seeing Rindou’s car out back. Walking out the door you replied, “ Yeah it was closed and it’s raining so I came-“ your boyfriend rudely interrupted, “To be all in his face.” He never approved of your friendship with the Haitanis, but he always thinks that someone is trying to take advantage of you. Outside of classes he rarely allowed you to go anywhere without him stating that he was protecting you from all of the racism and being kidnapped and sold off. You got stares when you weren’t on campus but being a black woman in Japan it’s a given. You didn’t mind it you always had room on the train because no one wanted to sit beside you and you loved when the little kids wanted to touch your hair.

“Excuse me?”

“You know how I feel about you and you purposely chose to hang around these men , they are no good they are womanizers who don’t have a problem taking you away from me.” He said sounding insecure. It hurt your heart knowing that he had no faith that even if someone tried to get with you that you would even give them the time of day. Deflated you replied, “ No one is going to take me away. You were running late and I saw their car so I came over to get out the cold.”

“I thought you said it was raining.”

He was starting to get on your nerves, every time you spent time with them it was the same argument over and over again. “Yes sweetheart it was cold and raining; those two go hand in hand.” You could hear that he was tired of this conversation to with the way he clenched his jaw when he said, “That still doesn’t explain why you were alone with him.” Omg dies he not realize he can not have it both ways! “Because Ran was upstairs on a business call and you don’t want me in their offices where they can lock me away.” You didn’t mean for it to sound like you were annoyed but you were. Trying to get you to see his way he explained, “I still don’t want you around them, they are bad news, they don’t care about your reputation or feelings just what they can get from you.” Laughing you assured him, “Sweetie I’m broke and depend on you,I have nothing they want.”

“They want you, I’ve seen the way that older brother looks at you.” He said as you turned on the side street.

“Ran is a flirt, he looks at everyone like that. He doesn’t know how to be normal.” You replied nonchalantly.

“What about the other one?”

“Rin, he’s just weird.” You started to blush remembering the kiss glad that your hair was frizzy enough to cover your face. Stopping he softly said, “Is that why he kissed you right before I walked in?” Your heart skipped a beat, you didn’t know that he saw. At least you hoped he hadn’t saw.

…

“You’re not even going to try and deny it?” He asked grabbing your wrist. You kept your head down more out of embarrassment than shame. You didn’t know how to respond even though he did deserve an answer. Without looking you replied, “What do you want me to say he came onto me. I didn’t even have time to process what happened before you came in.” You could feel his pressure rising as he tightened his grip on your wrist to turn you towards him.

“You must’ve liked it you didn’t even try and force him off you fucking slut!” He spat in disgust, you’ve never seen such hatred in his eyes towards you before. Yes you were wrong to not have immediately told him but he didn’t have to call you out your name. Getting defensive you said, “Watch how you’re talking to me. I told you I didn’t do anything.” His words became venomous as he stared you down saying, “Exactly except be a fucking whore. What is it the money, their family name; they’ll never claim you in public you’ll be a nothing more than a cocksleeve. And I’ll speak to you how I want, you wouldn’t have a place to sleep without me.”

“You think you own me? I would as soon die before I’d let-,” you grabbed your face feeling the sharp pain radiating across your cheek, “ahh you son a bitch did you just hit me?” You stared at him with hate in your eyes. You go to lunge at him but he caught you by the neck slamming you against the wall knocking the air out of you. He growled in your ear, “I’ll do it again if you don’t behave. Now we are going to go home and you’ll never see those two thugs ever again.” Trying to breathe all you could feel was his grip tightening around your throat as you vision tunneled. Suddenly you dropped from the wall and you gasped breathing in the fresh air. While on your knees you through your blurry vision you see a familiar green suit accompanied by the sound of a gun cocking. The last thing you hear before blacking out was a garbled voice saying, “She’s not going anywhere with you.”

@bubble4u @cottacyber @summerxxplosion

[crguang]

Sorry for double asking but what makes you like Zoya?? I feel like what I’m about to say is gonna get me sniped or outcasted but I don’t get the appeal of her. Like she attractive and hot but I honestly just can’t see her that way lowkey. I do admire her for wanting to change syndicate even if she knows the way isn’t through violence (which is something she’s know all her life) and is honestly willing to put her trust in this newbie, literally just woke up a week ago, chief. Cuz she sees that there’s a way forward through them for her and her people. Like it’s fascinating(?) to see her be able to look past the experience that the chief does not have and give them a chance, a footing if you will, in a world that doesn’t really want them. And literally put her life on the line and reputation too just so they can start making a difference.

Hopefully that reads coherently, honestly first time really writing down my thoughts like this in a while so hopefully it’s not a bunch of nonsense.

Tho…. I do think her an Bai Yi should sloppy, mouth open, kiss on the bike that she has. Can you imagine the soft sex they could have when Bai Yi got her out of the BR and she brought her back to her place or an hideout of some sort. Bai Yi telling her she’s an idiot while she patches up her wounds and probably even gives her bath too. After get her all cleaned and bandaged up she finally breaks down to which she’s kinda embarrassed by but doesn’t care because this woman almost fucking died because of some rando chief (I’m pretty sure they haven’t really met yet at this point) and Zoya leans towards her, pressing her forehead against hers and tell her she’s sorry and that she saw a chance for a better life for the legion, syndicate…. them.

She tells her she’ll make up for what happened before giving her a soft kiss on the corner of her mouth, Bai Yi looking at her a little stunned at the gesture but closes that gap between them that she didn’t even realize was so small and how she could feel Zoya’s hot breath on her lips. The kiss gets heated but not by too much cuz she’s doesn’t want to hurt her but Zoya tells her she’s a tough cookie, surviving being a freaking corpus for a BR. A very cocky smile on her face as looks at her with a desire she so desperately wants to show her. And Bai Yi give her a little pinch on her arm, letting out a weak laugh, telling her that she could’ve died. Zoya immediately telling her “but I didn’t did it.” Bai Yi nodding and then leaning into kiss her so fucking softly that it’s like she pressed a marshmallow to her lips or even a cloud perhaps.

And then they fuck with Zoya laying about ever so soft kisses on her skin and giving her little nibbles here and there. Making sure she could feel how much Zoya wants her NEEDS her and how much she cares for in the night.

…… okay I’m done lol hopefully that’s okay to put in your asks …. Ok bye 👋🏾 🧍🏾‍♀️🧍🏾‍♀️

-🍷

you asked why i liked zoya then answered your own question gehdbdjfn i love her for the same things you said. she’s a product of a super violent environment and she uses her power to change the city for the better. she knows new things cant be built on violence but it’s all she has and she’s still putting it to good use; her character arc was honestly amazinggg she’s been a favorite ever since. like yeah shes hot and her dick is big (i would know) but i just feel so hype whenever she’s on the screen, she’s one of those characters where they show up and you breathe a sigh of relief because you know they’re gonna win. she’s so cool !!! she’s cocky but she earned it because no one can beat her fr😭 her consciousness was being torn apart for i cant remember how long inside BR-004 and she still fought to the END! she’s sooo inspiring. chief barely did anything; zoya was the one who fought back and allowed earl/bai yi/chief to save her, if she was any weaker she would’ve turned into a corpus. there’s a lot of comfort that comes with being so strong, she makes others feel safe whenever she’s around and that’s so precious in a place like syndicate where suffering is the norm. seeing how she was treated growing up, the people she’s lost and how she turned into such a compassionate person anyway warmed my heart. character wise, she’ll always be on top, she’s a real comfort character fr— i’m literally like horo. like just know that i will gas her up every time, i’ll suck her dick every time! that’s my commander. my GOAT. she made the story click for me, i was intrigued before but when she showed up?! it was gigglefest. people said she sucked gameplay wise and GUESS WHAT. GOT HER ANYWAY. THATS MY TROPHY WIFE! she loves me so bad she came home in 2 pulls. what we have is something so real, so special and beautiful.

also yes that is definitely okay to put in my inbox i get fanfiction for free lmfaooo, bai yi is always next to zoya in some way in official art like she wants her so bad. she’s so annoying (affectionate) i still havent forgiven her for taking zoya from me though… literally stole my wife for over six months and it was never mentioned again like?;?;$:$ tbf i only just started ch.11 but stilllll— WHERE IS ZOYA. but it’s funny that you want them being soft and cute cause the bai yi/zoya stuff that i see is just them fucking nasty jdjfkgkg i havent even met bai yi (properly) in the story yet but i already love them because i know they would banter like crazy since bai’s a menace AND strong enough to hold her own against corpus!zoya so she must be super cocky too… if there’s no space for a third all i need is the tape🙂‍↕️

[sunlightandsuffering]

Size queen Mikasa hooking up with a guy to try and distract herself from the increasingly dirty thoughts she's been having about Eren and his cock. But then once the guy pulls down his pants he's considerably underwhelming down there compared to Erem to the point where Mikasa actually feels disappointed.

It doesn't make her heart beat faster or breathe heavier like Eren's does and doesn't fill her with that feeling of anxiousness and fear as to whether it would hurt but also excitedness out of wanting to find out. So before she even puts a hand on the guy's dick, she's turning him down and telling him this was a mistake and she's not feeling up for it. Rejecting a guy for the exact opposite reason she previously rejected Eren 😭

Me one the ferry writing moderately Porny drabbles 🤡

Colt is hot, Mikasa reassures herself, he’s very hot.

He’s the kind of hot that a lot of guys can’t pull off, a sweet nice surfer boy kinda vibe. He’s got blonde hair and kind eyes and enough muscle mass to throw her on the bed.

He’s hot she thinks, tells herself for the nth time. He’s hot so she should definitely have sex with him tonight, should definitely open the bedroom door where she knows hes waiting with rose petals and sexy music.

She should definitely open the door and screw him because right now Eren is railing someone else, some other girl he’d found at the club after Mikasa had told him very firmly she was going home with Colt.

Her friend had shrugged, blase and told her to text him when she got home safe, he’d go find someone to go home with too.

And now here she is, second guessing herself, because no matter how hot Colt is he’s never going to measure up to Eren.

Literally.

But she should try right?

Right??

Before she can think on it much more she forces her arms to move, pushing open the door to Colt’s room and there she finds him, seductive smile, clad in nothing but his boxers, his fingers toying with the waistband.

“Why don’t you get comfortable Mikasa?”

She swallows nervously before nodding, shucking off her top, her hands lingering around the waistband of her skirt, some part of her still hoping for a chance at escape. A

If she doesn’t take too many layers off it’ll be easier to leave.

But no she can’t think like that!

“You have beautiful breasts,” he compliments her, coming to the edge of the bed to help her undo her bra and Mikasa tries to get lost in it all, the feeling of warm caring hands slipping over her spine, undoing her bra with ease.

But then she falls into him as he tugs her over his body onto the bed and she can feel it, and it’s everything it’s not supposed to be.

It’s thick, that’s obvious, his girt impressive, but the length is so obviously lacking compared to what she’s used envisioning with Eren, feeling with Eren, every brush against her ass, that slow gentle grind he’ll allow if he’s really sleepy.

“Can you take your pants off?” She blurts out before she can stop herself, some desperate part of her needing to see it, to convince herself it’s fine, she’ll choke on it, it’ll feel good the way she knows Eren will. It’ll fill her with that same sense of anxiety and repudiation mixed with excitement and desire, the way her stomach drops when she thinks about taking him to the hilt, how it’ll probably sting, be so beautifully painful. How she’ll need a moment to adjust, how he’ll hold her hips with such affection, praising her with every inch she takes, giving her exactly what she needs to sink herself down onto him all the way, to get fucked like she deserves.

It’ll be exactly the same, she promises herself, exactly the same.

Colt looks surprised for a moment, coming up from kissing her neck to look at her curiously but he nods nonetheless, an easy grin overtaking his face.

“Eager aren’t you?”

He will live to regret his words.

Because as he uncovers his clothed cock, thick and weeping with precum, ruddy pink coloured, Mikasa comes to a very unfortunate conclusion as she measures it with her eyes, probably around 5 or so inches.

It’s not a bad dick per se, in fact it’s exactly the kind of thing she used to thirst for, would imagine taking her virginity with a nice average sized boy.

But now, it’s simply not enough, not long enough, not the right girth, doesn’t leave her breathless like Eren does with every press against her, every accidental glimpse of him rock hard and flipped up against the waistband of his sweats, barely contained, lying flaccid down his thigh in a way that makes her mouth water because even soft he’s monstrous. It doesn’t tempt her the same way, not accompanied by Eren’s teasing words of all the girls who can’t take it, all the girls who have tried, how he’s sure she probably could if anyone, that she’s just so flexible, that she just sits so pretty in his lap.

She shudders as she recalls his words, grunted against her ear, low and deep as they were on the dance floor, how her body seemed to compliment his so well, she can barely contain herself.

Colt is smiling at her so sweetly as he shows himself off, his hand working over his cock, and it grows maybe an inch but it’s still not enough.

She’s staring at his dick and all she can think about is how Eren lamented earlier how hard it is to get girls to suck him off, how he doesn’t fit, how she’d probably choke and she just can’t help but compare.

And unfortunately for Colt, he does not measure up, not in the least, because she doesn’t ache with just the thought of him, doesn’t throb with the idea of being one of the first girls to take him to the hilt, to choke on his cock like a dirty little slut and be covered in his cum when he finally blows his load.

With that she stands up, awkwardly gathering her bra, her hand coming up to cover her breasts, “sorry this was a mistake.”

“Mikasa-what-I?”

“I umm, it’s just not enough,” she blurts as she gathers her things, attempting to make a hasty exit, but Colt doesn’t allow it.

“What isn’t?”

She stands in the doorway of his room, and is thrown back to all those months ago when she did the same thing to another boy but for the opposite reason, how he’d be laughing at her now.

“Your umm dick, it’s just not big enough.”

And then she’s sprinting from his apartment and it feels like divine retribution because this time instead of leaving in fear of something so big inside her she’s burning with desire for it, she needs Eren. And she’s starting to remember some details about that guy she’d rejected all those months ago, his dick engraved in her brain, and she wonders if Eren had absolutely fumed when she’d forgotten who he was altogether.

[sweetmusingss]

Oscar hardly budged when she grabbed his arm, not wanting to move away from you at all. He did feel genuinely bad for leading Sophie on, never wanting to hurt anyone. But he had finally started to open his eyes lately and realized that she was the reason that he had distanced himself from you. Yes, he was a grown adult and was responsible for his own actions but he had allowed her to pull him away from you. “Sophie, I am really sorry.. I never should have led you on when my heart was elsewhere. I never thought I had a chance but now that I do, I can’t be with you anymore. We can’t go to Australia together. I am going to take Renee with me,” he said, giving you a soft expression. He didn’t even know if you would want to go away for a month with him but he just hoped you would. He didn’t want to be without you for a whole entire month. “I will give you the money back for your ticket,” he said to her, knowing she probably was going to slap him but it would be worth it.

Sophie glared at Oscar, absolutely fuming. “I can’t believe this. I told you she played mind games, and now she’s just playing another one. She won’t love you like I do, Oscar. You’ll always be the pathetic little lost puppy who follows her around and she just misses that. She’ll break your heart sooner or later, once Charles is back in her good graces.” They argue back and forth for what feels like an eternity before she finally just shoves past us both, demanding a refund within an hour. She was honestly a bit happy that she didn’t need to go and spend a month in some random country doing a bunch of outdoor activities that Oscar seemed so excited about, she was more of an indoors type of girl.

I watch as Sophie walks away, wanting to rip her apart but controlling my anger since I was with Oscar now and he needed to board asap or else he’d miss the flight. I glance towards him, my heart fit to burst as I see him looking at me in that soft way he did, immediately moving closer to him and wrapping my arms around his neck. “You need to get on that plane, Oscar... I can’t be the reason you miss it. But I need you to know that what she said isn’t true. I don’t ever want to hurt you again. I hurt you for so long without even knowing it and I am going to spend the rest of my life making up for it...” I assumed that Oscar saying I’d go with him was just a way of cementing the break up, not actually believing that he’d want me to go away with him for an entire month to his home. We had so much to work through and I wouldn’t blame him for to clear his head, even though it would be the most romantic thing ever if he did ask me to go.

\\

We ended up fooling around for a long while that night and I fell asleep against your chest after the exhaustion of three orgasms hit me. I slept better than I had in a long time, always struggling to fall asleep. It came with my career and the fact that my mind was always working. The next morning, you had some meetings so you had to leave for a few hours but we were going to go on our date shortly after you came back home. I kissed you goodbye and I spent your time away taking a shower and then reading some of my book. I ended up just chilling in your bed wearing one of your Red Bull shirts and I FaceTimed Renee, eager to talk to her. I knew she was definitely celebrating with Charles last night but I wanted to tell her about Canada and tell her just how much I truly liked you.

Renee was sitting by Charles’ pool with Leo in her lap as she answered the call, Charles was off doing some Monaco-winner things along with some debriefs, so she was alone just as you were. As soon as she answered, she was lifting her sunglasses off and giving her friend a knowing look. “Please tell me you fucked Max Verstappen and please tell me he has a giant dick like I imagine he does.” Renee definitely always had a mini crush on Max, there was something so downright sexy about him and she couldn’t deny that. She would always choose Charles, he was her perfect match, but if she could ever have one night with an F1 driver, Max would be one of her first picks.

[glitterslag]

first and second kisses.

Synopsis: Chrissy and Eddie start to accept what they're feeling for one another. A drunken mistake changes things for good.

Warnings: drugs, language, angst, some kissin

Word Count: 7k!

Author's note: A super long one!! Thanks so much for all the love on all my other Eddissy fics! Please interact with this if you like it (it's what keeps me going!) and pls pls don't be afraid to pop into my inbox to spout off about Eddissy/hellcheer with me!!!!!!

The first time she tries to kiss him it’s with a skinful of beer.

It’s Friday night, and when Chrissy doesn't show up at Eddie’s after cheer like usual, it hurts his feelings. He knows it shouldn’t, but it does. 

It’s basically a given at this point - her not going out with the sports crowd anymore. She prefers to hang out with him and smoke instead. Even if neither of them have acknowledged that out loud.

He thinks about calling the guys to hang out, saying something about it being a slow night, but he knows they’ll only make fun of him. He knows they don’t buy the excuse he's been using, about Friday night being a big night for him, money wise. Even though it's not exactly a lie, they’ve started to catch on to the fact that he’s been making sure everybody has what they need for the weekend by Thursday evenings, now. So that he can have his Fridays to himself. And he’s pretty sure they’ve figured out that there’s a girl. They just don’t have any idea that it’s her. 

He’s laying on his bed later that night, playing his guitar and sulking, when there's a bang on the door. She’s been to some party - a guy on the basketball team with a pool and a free house, and when he opens the trailer door she’s swaying a little. 

“Hey…” He says, somewhat taken aback to see her standing there, staring up at him expectantly. 

“How’d you get here?”

“Stole a bike.” She mumbles, falling into him slightly when she steps over the threshold.

It makes him smile despite himself.

Chrissy’s a party girl. She always has been, ever since freshman year. She’s always down for it, always game. Always guaranteed to be there at any occasion, drinking, full of pep, everyone’s friend. That’s how she likes to present herself, anyway. And it’s what she’s always liked about alcohol, too. The way it allows her to embody that girl, the life and soul of the party - of the school - that everyone needs her to be. 

Recently, however, she’s been starting to slip.

In truth, she’s felt better for not drinking so often. When she’s with Eddie she’ll smoke, sure, but that’s different. It makes her feel different. She’ll sip a beer slowly while watching a movie, maybe, but that’s it. She doesn’t feel that need, that compulsion to get wasted anymore. She doesn’t need to take herself somewhere far away from her body when she’s around him.

“It was a bad idea to go to the party.” She says, sipping from the glass of water Eddie’s brought over. What she really means to say is that she’s sorry she went. Sorry she blew him off.

“Why did you?” He asks. 

He’s standing in the opposite corner of the room, eyes dark and unreadable.

“I dunno,” she shrugs. “People started pre-gaming like, straight after cheer practice and I sorta got sucked into it, I guess.”

Eddie nods, fiddling with something behind the kitchen counter that she can’t see.

“And Jason wouldn’t let it go. Kept saying I hadn’t gone to one in ages, so.”

“Sure.”

“He was kind of being a dick, to be honest. At the party, I mean. Like, he would ignore me one minute then be all over me the next, and-”

“Why’d you come here?” Eddie cuts in. 

Chrissy looks at him for a moment, not quite knowing what to say. Had he not wanted her to come?

“Um..”

The truth is that one tepid can of natty light too many and she’d felt that pull that she knows all too well. The one that she can’t resist. Telling her to get out of there and head someplace she can breathe easier. 

“I don’t know,” she begins. “I-”

Eddie interrupts again, voice cold.

“To be honest with you, Chrissy, I’m getting a little tired of being the guy you come to when you’re bored of your real relationship.”

She looks up sharply.

“What?”

“I’m not your replacement boyfriend, ok?” He continues, quieter this time. Softer.

There’s a pause, and then he says something else. So quiet she almost wonders whether she really hears it.

“I’m not your second choice.”

She’s stunned. It’s not what she’s expecting to come out of his mouth at all. He doesn’t sound angry. He sounds like he’s… somewhere else. Far away somewhere inside his head, where she can’t follow.

“I’m not- that’s not…”

The beer is making Chrissy slow. She can’t quite think of the right thing to say in response. Instead, she gets up and walks over to the kitchen island. When Eddie doesn’t move, she tries to reach for his hands across the counter. That’s when he pulls away.

“Eddie.” She breathes, big eyes growing glassy. 

She doesn’t understand where this is all coming from. He’s never said anything like this before.

“What?” He shrugs, turning away from her slightly. He won’t meet her eyes.

She walks around to the other side of the counter until she’s standing in front of him. 

“Eddie…” She says it again, hands reaching out to touch his cheeks. To make him look at her. The expression on his face - it tugs at her chest.

He reaches up to grab her wrist, goes to push her away - honestly he does. But he freezes for a moment instead, because before he can comprehend what’s actually happening, she’s leaning in to kiss him.

There are a number of seconds where he can’t react. Too shocked by the move to even process it, the only thing he’s aware of is soft lips and her smell - intoxicating and sweet. And then he’s coming to, and he’s pushing her off, hard.

“Chrissy man, what the fuck?” He half-yells, springing away from her with a hand on his lips.

She stumbles backwards, eyes huge. 

She can’t say anything.

“What the fuck?!” He repeats.

For a moment, they’re mirror images of each other. Standing there in the kitchen, struck dumb, faces pale with shock and fingers ghosting over their mouths. Eddie’s heart is beating out of his chest, his body stinging with anger and embarrassment and hurt and a million other things, all at once. 

Chrissy starts rambling.

“I'm sorry Eddie,” she blurts. “I’m sorry. I- oh my God, I-” 

“I think you should go.” He says.

Her brows furrow as she takes in what he says.

“Wait, no, I-” 

“Chrissy, please.” He repeats, quiet and terrifying.  

“Get out.”

Her eyes are filling with hot tears.

He’s kicking her out. It’s late and it’s dark out there - and oh god, he hates her, she knows he does - and she can’t believe he’s really kicking her out.

“On- on my own?” She manages, finally. 

Even drunk, she knows it sounds pathetic.

Eddie looks at her for a long time, and then she thinks she sees his face soften, just a tiny bit, if only for a brief moment.

“No.” He relents, no louder than a whisper now. “No, of course not.”

He grabs his keys off of the counter and he’s pushing them towards her, into her chest.

“Get in the car.” He says. “I’ll be there in a minute.”

—---

“I should’ve known you would’ve never kissed me back.” Chrissy whispers, full minutes later, as Eddie drives down the dark roads in silence. He hasn’t said anything since they got into the car.

“You probably don’t even remember this…” She begins, eyes fixed on her hands which are clasped tightly together in her lap. “But you totally saved my ass once, in Junior year. It was at a Halloween party.” 

Eddie does remember. 

She had been dressed up as Glinda the good witch. She wore a pink ballet skirt and fairy wings, plus a magic wand that had gone missing around about the fourth drink. But what really pulled it all together, Eddie had noted, was the red solo cup filled with vodka that she’d been carrying around with her, clutched to her chest the whole time.

Chrissy takes his silence as an opportunity to go on. 

“I’d never seen you at a party before.” She says, and Eddie isn’t surprised.

He doesn’t usually go to any parties, but that night he was there, trying to make a buck selling pot to some seniors. 

“I got super drunk that night.” She continues. “Jason kept filling my drink back up with pure liquor. And one of the guys had managed to get hold of some molly. Jason was trying to convince me it would be funny to take some.”

She sighs, staring at something far off out of the window.

Chrissy had smiled at him when he’d walked into that party. 

It was a difficult thing to admit, but he’d been nervous to go. He knew he wasn’t supposed to be there, sticking out like a sore thumb loitering on the large, manicured lawn. But he’d had a concert to go that week, all the way in Detroit, in fact, and he knew that if he wanted to have gas and beer money he was going to need to shift some product. He remembers waiting in the dark and noticing Chrissy, sitting on the steps outside with her friends, bare feet poking out from her pink dress, which fanned out on the stone all around her. And she’d smiled at him. No one else had even looked his way, but she’d smiled. Big and full of teeth. 

Eddie’s always remembered thinking that the two of them were cool with each other, somehow. That even though they didn’t talk, there was something unspoken there - a recognition. From middle school. 

But it was delusional. She was like that with everyone. Smiled at everyone. It didn’t make him special.

Eddie sighs.

“I remember.” He says, softly.

It’s the first thing he’s said to her since they got into the van.

“You do?”

Eddie nods, gaze fixed on her from over the center console.

“That's why you hate Jason, isn't it?” Chrissy implores.

“One of many reasons, yeah.”

Eddie had watched Jason pour more liquor into her cup several times over the course of that night and he’d tried to ignore it. Wasn’t his business, he’d convinced himself, and for a little while it worked. But as he’d been coming out from the bathroom, two or three baggies lighter and stuffing notes into his pockets, he’d overheard something he couldn’t turn a blind eye to.

“Hey man, that’s fucked.” He’d found himself saying to Jason, who had Chrissy trapped up against the kitchen counter, the small white pill held in his palm. She was significantly drunker than when he’d seen her last.

Jason looked around for the source of his voice.

“Don’t give her that.” He’d reiterated when Jason’s eyes settled on him. “She’s black-out drunk.”

Jason’s mouth curled into a humourless smile as he surveyed Eddie.

“That’s rich coming from the town drug dealer.”

Eddie had ignored him, reaching over to put a hand on Chrissy’s shoulder instead. She’d looked up at him, a little startled, not fully aware of what was going on around her. 

“Hey, you don’t have to take that.”

Chrissy remembers the sound of Eddie’s voice that night, both deeper and gentler than she’d expected. 

“I c’n do what I want…” She’d mumbled, pulling away from him, dimly aware through the cloud of alcohol that everyone was looking at her. She was embarrassed. 

Jason smiled triumphantly. 

“See?” He’d goaded, squaring up to Eddie until they were virtually chest to chest. “She doesn’t wanna talk to you, freak.”

Chrissy knew that what Jason was doing was wrong, but to admit that outwardly, to make a scene in the middle of the kitchen, that would’ve been worse. 

“She can do what she wants, creep!” Someone else echoed from across the kitchen.

Eddie rolled his eyes.

That’s when he’d turned to Tina, Chrissy’s closest friend, and the only other girl in there who’s name he knew. She’d been watching on this whole time, eyes wide.

“Hey. Tina, right?” Eddie had said in a low voice, touching her shoulder briefly, and she nodded quickly, biting her lip. 

He jerked his head towards Chrissy. 

“You better get her out of here.”

That was the last thing Chrissy remembered before she woke up in a sleeping bag the next morning, on Tina’s floor.

“I never said thank you.” Chrissy says quietly, jolting Eddie back to reality. She’s looking over at him, face pale in the dark car. Eddie realises he’s been gripping the steering wheel like a vice.

“Didn't need to.” He murmurs.

“Jason cussed you out at school on Monday, didn't he?” Chrissy recalls.

He’d left the party pretty quickly after that, not about to get himself into any fights. Thankfully, no one came after him, but whispers followed him towards the front entrance, and he heard someone shout who invited you, loner? just before he managed to slip out of the door. His face burned in the cold night. 

The following morning at school, Jason was indeed on one of his tirades. 

“Well if it isn’t the white knight himself.” He’d sneered down the corridor as Eddie walked through the hall, a nasty grin plastered across his face.

Chrissy stood anxiously behind him, peering around his shoulder. She watched as Eddie’s face flickered just a tiny bit as he sauntered over to his locker, but he didn’t even look up. 

“You need something Jason?” He’d called back, fiddling with the code on the padlock. Unbothered.

Jason laughed, and so did his basketball guys, flanking him like usual.

“Did you get your panties in a twist for the star cheerleader, Munson?” Jason called out again.

Something hot was curling in Chrissy’s stomach. She was tugging at Jason’s sleeve, trying silently to get him to stop, but he just carried on.

Eddie looked over then, only for a second - gaze flickering between Jason, his friends and then her. When his eyes met Chrissy’s, it felt like being burnt.

Eddie just shrugged, turning back to his locker. 

“Whatever, man.” He shouted casually over his shoulder. People were starting to stare again. “At least I’m not some opportunistic creep who likes to get girls drunk and take advantage.” 

He looked back pointedly at Jason after he said it, and there was a quiet chorus of titters from onlookers.

“It was… pretty cool, actually.” Chrissy admits. “The way you clapped back at him like that.”

Eddie’s quiet, eyes on the road ahead. It’s impossible to tell what he’s thinking.

“I've never seen anybody stand up to Jason the way you did. Still do.” She corrects herself. 

“I just stood there and said nothing.”

She’s looking down at her hands again, ashamed.

“It's okay.” Eddie says, gently. 

“I know it's hard for you. Being… miss popular, or whoever.” 

The nickname makes Chrissy wince.

“I know it’s difficult to speak your mind with him.” 

“I don't wanna be that person anymore.” Chrissy says, more to herself than to him. 

Eddie shrugs. 

“You'll do what you have to do, I guess.”  He says.

He moves like he's about to say something else, then, but Chrissy jumps in suddenly.

“He wouldn't have - Jason, I mean. I know how it looked, but, Eddie, he wouldn't have…. Y’know.” 

“What?” Eddie prompts.

Chrissy squirms a little.

“He wouldn’t have… done anything. To me.” She murmurs, not quite able to make herself say the words out loud. “I think he just thought it would be funny to get me fucked up. Not that that's not bad in itself, but…” 

“Don't defend him.” Eddie almost snaps. There’s anger in his voice, but it’s not for her anymore. She knows that now.

“I'm not.” Chrissy says quickly. “Believe me. It's just. We never did that, so.” 

“Did what?”

“Sex.”

“Oh.”

It feels like a bucket of cold water being dumped over his head.

She’s never talked about this, wouldn't be saying any of this if she was sober. It's coming out of her mouth in a confused jumble and she can't stop it. She only hopes Eddie understands what she means. The weight behind what she’s saying.

“We did other stuff,” she blurts. “Just not that. Uh, he wanted to wait for… well he wanted to wait.”

Eddie looks strained, his brows knitted together and his mouth tight.

“And I did, too. I didn't wanna do it. Not - not with him.” 

“Okay.”

“I wouldn't have let him.” Chrissy says finally.

There’s a dull ache in Eddie’s chest.

It’s quiet in the car. Chrissy’s looking down at her hands but he can hear her sniffling a little and it makes him feel bad. He’s thawing out by the minute now, has been since the second he shouted at her, really, back there in his trailer. He feels like he should say something. 

“Hey, I'm sorry okay?” he says gently, glancing over at her. “I'm sorry for being mean.”

He means it. 

“But you have a boyfriend, Chrissy. And you're really drunk right now.”

He pauses a beat and sighs.

“I mean, what was I supposed to do?”

You were supposed to do exactly what you did, she thinks. 

Eddie's a good man. 

The lump in her throat prevents her from responding the way she really wants. 

“I've missed my curfew.” She says instead. 

They’re rounding the corner onto her street.

“I didn’t sell them that molly, by the way.” Eddie adds, almost as an afterthought. 

“It would be okay if you did.” Chrissy says, voice weak and tired. “You didn’t know.”

“I know. But I just wanted to let you know.”

“I believe you.”

Eddie slows, scanning the cul-de-sac for a place to park up, and at the same time they notice Chrissy’s dad standing on the front porch, arms folded.

Shit.

“Shit.”

“Shit.” Chrissy hisses, eyes wild as she whips her head round to look at Eddie. 

It’s a violent lurch back to reality.

“Shit shit shit.” She mutters, fumbling around on the floor to quickly grab up her things. 

“What am I gonna do?” She implores, looking up at him desperately as he starts reversing into a space. All of a sudden she feels sober. 

Eddie laughs lightly, shaking his head. 

“Hell, I dunno, Chris.”

She shoots him a look of disbelief. 

“It's not funny! I'm gonna get killed!” 

He says nothing, just parks up, looking at her as he puts the handbrake on. He runs his tongue over his top lip as his eyes sweep over the scene. There’s a glint of mirth there that’s almost imperceptible. 

“Eddieee.” Chrissy whines, craning her neck anxiously in an attempt to gauge her father’s mood across the distance. “You gotta help me!”

“Uh-uh.” He says firmly. “I'm not getting involved in this.”

He leans across her and opens the passenger side door for her, and then, not wholly unkindly, he says: 

“Go deal with your mess, babe.”

She stares at him for a second, incredulous.

Reluctantly, she gets out of the car. 

—------------------

Secretly, Chrissy’s glad to be grounded.

Sure, it had been horrible when her dad had frog-marched her through into the kitchen after she’d turned up on the doorstep that night and made her face her mother. Made her explain to her where she’d been. What she’d done. It was horrible the next morning at breakfast, sober and head pounding, as her parents had eyed her over the orange juice, spewing fresh torrents of vitriol her way.

But afterwards came the relief. She had an excuse, now, not to go out anymore. Something to say to her friends next time they begged her to come along to some party. There was relief, too, when she had called up Jason, Eddie’s words echoing round her aching skull. Clean up your mess, babe. Damage control.

It was scary listening to the dial tone, breath bated, bracing herself for Jason’s reaction upon hearing what she had to say. But when she finally put down the receiver, she felt lighter.

Lighter and lighter with each friend she called, explaining to them that her and Jason were over. That she was grounded and wouldn’t be coming out with them anymore, not for a while. It felt a little like the way purging felt, only there was no sting of bile left in the back of her throat.

Of course, she tells no-one the truth about her and Eddie. She tells them bits and pieces of her night - about how she’d gotten too drunk and slipped away, not feeling well. She tells them she’d tried to make it home on her own and ended up getting a ride from someone, and her mom had killed her. The only person Chrissy tells anything close to the truth is Tina. Save from the kiss, she tells Tina almost everything, and when she asks Chrissy why she was meeting up with Eddie in the first place, she says it was because she’d been paired up with him to study.

“At first, that’s all it was,” Chrissy explains, talking fast to prevent Tina from interrupting. “Studying together. But then I realised that Eddie’s actually really cool. I think you’d like him, Tina, if you just gave him a chance.”

Tina’s not convinced, but Chrissy knows she won’t tell. It was Tina who had taken her home from the Halloween party all that time ago, after all, who’d wrapped her up in her warm coat and carried her high-heels in her hand. Tina knows what kind of man Eddie Munson is.

It feels good to tell the truth, even if it's only in fragments.

Late that night, after her parents have gone to sleep, Chrissy calls Eddie. It’s Wayne who answers. 

“Munson residence.” He says, voice gruff. She wonders whether he’s been sleeping.

“Uh, hello.” She starts, unsure of what to say. “Is Eddie there?”

“Who is this?” 

“Um, my name’s Chrissy Cunningham?”

Reluctantly, Wayne puts his nephew on.

Eddie laughs his ass off when she tells him what happened. 

“Grounded until college?!” He squawks, not bothering to hide his delight. “Can she even do that?”

“Laura’s roof, Laura’s rules.” Chrissy explains with a sigh. “My dad didn’t spare her any details about how drunk I was.”

“But you’re eighteen.” 

She scoffs. 

“Clearly you haven’t met my mom.”

“Damn, I don’t think I wanna.” 

Mercifully, Chrissy’s dad had had enough discretion not to tell her mom he’d watched his daughter get dropped off by a long-haired boy he’d never seen before, knowing that the outcome of that would be far worse than her simply getting grounded. He’d always been the more lenient of the two, and besides - deep down, he knows the most important thing is his kid getting home to him in one piece.

“I bet you’ve never been grounded in your life, have you?” Chrissy asks.

“Perks of not having parents around, I guess.” 

It’s a little insane how much better Chrissy feels just from hearing Eddie’s voice for two minutes. Like her whole body relaxes, and suddenly she can breathe easier. She realises that being with Eddie, even just over the phone - it’s a little like being high.

She apologizes for last night and it’s easier through a receiver. Eddie tells her it’s okay, it’s nothing to worry about. And then she decides to bite the bullet.

“I broke up with Jason.”

“Oh.” 

He truly hasn't been expecting that. 

“Why?” He ventures, after a little while.

“Well.” She starts. “I guess the long version would be that my heart hasn't been in it for a while. That I think it's best we focus on trying to finish school and that we'll be going away to different colleges.” Chrissy pauses and takes a deep breath before she carries on. “And I guess the short version is that I would have cheated on him with you last night, if you'd let me.”

She traces the numbers on the dial pad with her finger, anxious for his response.

“So you do remember that.”

He hadn’t been quite sure. She’d seemed pretty coherent, in the car. And the palpable tension between them, there from when he’d first put the receiver to his ear, made him think that she did remember. But like hell was going to be the one to bring it up first.

“I wasn't that drunk, Eds.”

His heart twinges a little when she calls him that name.

“Did you tell Jason?” He’s saying suddenly, gnawing at his nails as he stands there in the trailer hallway. “About.. You know.”

“No, no of course not.” 

“Thank God.”

“How come?”

“Um, because I could go without getting beat to a pulp this week?”

“Right.” She laughs. 

“Sooo.. what did you tell him?” 

Eddie’s curious despite himself, not quite believing what he’s hearing. He was so sure that everything would just go back to normal, that Chrissy would go back to pretending that everything was okay with Jason and that nothing would change. So when Chrissy tells him that they actually broke up? Yeah, it floors him.

“What I told you.” She says, simply. “Minus the stuff about the kiss. Oh, and I told him about SIU, too.”

“Yeah? How’d he take it?”

“Fine, actually.” She admits. “I don’t think he was really all that surprised.”

“You’re a good person, Chrissy.” Eddie says.

Her throat tightens a little when she hears it, not only because she doesn’t believe that it’s true right now but because Eddie is the one who thinks it. Still thinks it, despite everything.

“I feel like an ass.”

“No.” He says firmly, shaking his head. “You’re not. You could've easily pretended like nothing happened, but you didn't.”

She doesn't answer. He presses on. 

“We all fuck up sometimes. Hell - me more than most.”

“Eddie?” Chrissy whispers.

“What is it?”

“Uh…” 

This is Chrissy’s final boss of the day. The thing she has to force out of her mouth.

“Well I was thinking. About…  the kiss…”

She trails off.

“Yeah?” 

“Mm-hmm.” 

She can't make herself say it. 

“And what were you thinking?”

She can't gauge Eddie’s tone without seeing his face. His voice has gone low and breathy in her ear, and he sounds… a little smug, mainly. But there’s something else hidden there, too. 

“Well I was thinking that if my mom ever lets me out of my room, I wouldn't mind, y’know, maybe having a redo?”

It tumbles off her tongue, and then Eddie laughs and the moment shatters.

“You're laughing.” She points out, self-conscious.

“S’funny.” He counters. 

 She feels hot in her pajamas, cheeks heating up to unreasonable levels. 

“So can we have a redo or not?” she repeats, fiddling with the phone cord anxiously. 

“I dunno Chris, I wasn’t that into it, actually.”

“What?!”

“I’m kidding.” He laughs again, clearly enjoying himself. “Jesus.”

“Don’t fucking do that to me.” She sulks, embarrassed. 

 “I'm putting myself on the line here.”  

It’s true. Here she is, risking her pride and everything else only to have him say that in return. It’s mortifying. 

“Oh you poor thing. I'm sorry.”

Eddie’s grin is miles wide. Half of him wants nothing more than to say he’d love to kiss her again, and then maybe again after that, but he’s having a little too much fun dangling Queen Chrissy Cunningham on the end of his strings. 

Eddie the puppet master, he muses.

After that, they start talking on the phone most nights after Chrissy finishes dinner. 

Mostly, they talk about exams, quiz each other on calculus and John Steinbeck quotes and key dates in US history, and her mom lets her get away with it because it’s school related. They have whispered conversations about other things, too, once Laura’s in bed. Eddie teases Chrissy about missing having her around. 

“Although,” he contemplates, “I am making much more money now you’re not smoking up all my stash.”

“Funny, that.” She giggles, playing along. “I was thinking about quitting anyway.”

“Hey, don’t be rash.” 

Chrissy’s getting used to his teasing, is even learning how to give it back. It catches Eddie off guard every time. They carry on like this most nights until either Chrissy’s too tired to stay awake or Wayne kicks Eddie off the phone.

—---------------

They don’t see much of each other at school, aside from quick smiles in the corridor and across the lunch room. In fact, Chrissy doesn’t get to speak to Eddie in person at all until the day they get their exam results.

Eddie walks in with his walkman on and his head down, late as usual. He scans the parking lot automatically, eyes always searching for her. He’s half looking for the green and yellow of her cheer uniform, but she’s not wearing it today. Hasn’t for a while, actually. High school is officially over. He finally spots her in jeans and a turqouise bomber, and it’s a little weird for him to see.

Chrissy got to school that morning bright and early, and she’s standing in the parking lot with a gaggle of her cheer friends. The mood is high - they’re laughing and making summer plans and discussing colleges, but Chrissy’s quiet. She’s feeling a little sick, to tell the truth.

Like the majority of her friends, she got the grades to get into her first choice college. She hadn’t really expected that it would actually happen, but it has: a B- in math. She’s going to SIU. Her parents still don’t know she applied there, however, and it’s all starting to feel a little too real.

Weakly, she holds up her hand in greeting. The smile Eddie shoots back across the car park comes out more like a grimace. 

“Why are you waving at that freak, Chrissy?” One of the girls pipes up from down their line. 

Lisa - one of the ones Chrissy’s never really liked. Tina shoots her a nervous glance, but it’s okay. A couple of months ago, that question would’ve thrown Chrissy for a loop, but not today. By now, she’s worked out how to play it cool.

“Eddie’s actually pretty nice.” She shrugs. “We used to be study partners.”

“Whatever. He’s a freak.”

Tina cuts in in an attempt to lighten the mood. 

“Hey uh, we’re heading down to the diner this afternoon to celebrate, right guys?”

Everyone nods, looking at Chrissy expectantly.

“You coming, Chris?”

She panics, realising her mom already told Tina’s that Chrissy’s been allowed out of her bedroom on probation. Even Laura isn’t evil enough to prevent her daughter from celebrating her exams.

“Oh, uhh.. no. I can’t today.” She improvises. “I’m doing Atkins.”

She throws an apologetic look at the girls, who nod back knowingly.

“Oh. Your mom still got you on that programme?” Lisa asks.

“Uh, yeah.”

“Yikes.” 

“You could just come and get a salad?” Tina suggests hopefully. 

“I really couldn’t.” Chrissy replies with an exaggerated shake of her head. “I’d cave and eat something greasy for sure. But thanks, you guys.” 

The girls nod woefully and start gathering their stuff, throwing her apologetic smiles as they leave.

“But hey,” Chrissy calls out after them optimistically. “It shouldn't be too much longer. Only five more pounds to go!”

She shoots Lisa a weak thumbs up. Everyone looks a little awkward, mumbling half-hearted good lucks and see you laters over their shoulders.

“I’ll eat a hotdog for you!” Tina half yells as she backs towards her car. 

“Make sure ya do!” 

Lying like a pro. She’s pulled it off.

Once she’s got her friends successfully off her ass, she turns her attention to locating Eddie. He walks out of the side entrance of the gym a few minutes later, face unreadable. Oh no you don’t. She thinks. 

She starts speed-walking towards him, stepping out in front of him when he doesn’t see her and stopping him in his tracks. He jumps back slightly, startled.

“So?” She says hopefully. 

He looks around for a second before looking back at her, and then his face breaks into a massive grin. 

Chrissy squeals. 

“You passed?” 

“Yep.”

“Yess!”

She hops a little on the spot, reaching up to give him the hardest high-five she can muster, and without thinking he slides his fingers through her own. They stand like that for a beat, grinning at each other with their hands interlaced, until Eddie’s brought back to himself and he drops her hand quickly with a cough. 

“Uh, but. Not only that…” He rummages in his inside pocket and brings out the folded piece of paper, printed with his grades. He holds it out in front of her, and Chrissy scans the line of Ds and Cs until she sees it. 

She squeals again. 

“B IN LIT?” 

“Yep!” He shouts triumphantly, fist in the air.

“Eddie, oh my god.”

He shrugs and scratches at his neck, a huge, sunny smile plastered across his beautiful face.

“I guess those notes you wrote me really helped.”

Chrissy shakes her head at his modesty, grinning. 

“No, no Eddie - it was your hard work. You should be proud.”

“Nah, that was all you, babe.”

They both stand there, grinning goofily at each other for a second. It hasn’t escaped her notice that he’s been calling her that rather a lot recently. 

Eddie’s pulled out of his reverie by a car horn blaring at him from across the parking lot. 

“Shit that’s Jeff.”

Chrissy springs away from him guiltily, turning to see Jeff, one of Eddie’s friends from Hellfire, hanging out of his car window. His arm is outstretched, palm facing upwards as if to say, what's the holdup?

"I gotta go tell him the good news.” Eddie says, glancing around awkwardly as Jeff glares at him from the window of his busted car. “But uh, if you feel like celebrating later…?” He trails off, shooting her a hopeful grin.

“Sure.” she says, shyly.

“Will your mom let you go?”

She nods.

“I’m un-grounded on a trial period, remember?”

“Okay, great.”

“Meet me at the end of my street?” 

Eddie doesn’t say anything, just nods, grinning bashfully. Chrissy’s turning red.

“I’ll see you then, Eddie.”

He nods again, clearing his throat. 

“I’ll see you then.”

—---------------------

She asks him, instead of doing their usual thing, to go out.

“Out?” He repeats as he helps her clamber into the passenger seat of his van, shutting the heavy door after her.

“Yeah.” She nods at him as he gets into the driver's side. She’s been rehearsing this conversation in her head. “Since we’re celebrating and all. I was thinking, like, to a movie maybe?”

“Ok, sure.” 

Chrissy picks at herself anxiously in the flip-down mirror. She’s wearing her hair down and a mohair sweater it’s too warm for, and tiny, itchy bits of yarn are coming off and sticking to her lip gloss. 

“Jason called this afternoon.” She says, shooting Eddie a glance. She doesn’t miss the way his jaw clenches slightly at the mention of him. 

"Ah, my old pal Jason." He jokes. “What’d he want?”

“He told me he didn’t get into Michigan.”

“You serious?”

Jason had sounded… bad, on the phone. Like he was in some kind of trance. She could tell he was trying to keep stoic when he’d told her he’d gotten into his back-up school, Bloomington, but underneath it all, he sounded like he was unraveling.

“I hope he’s okay.” Chrissy says aloud in the car. Eddie glances up.

She might not love Jason anymore, but Chrissy knows how important Michigan was to him. To his parents, and even the school. Jason’s had that school picked out since forever. The pressure his parents pile on him - she’s seen it firsthand. It’s enough to suffocate someone. And Chrissy knows how that feels.

“Guess nothing ever works out the way you think.” Eddie says, and Chrissy looks over at him, the sun filtering in through the car window and casting him in a halo-like glow. It’s the first time she notices that his hair isn’t all the way black. There’s a warmth to it. Like chocolate.

Jason didn’t get the grades to get into Michigan, and she’s on a date to the movies with Eddie Munson. She’s going to SIU in the fall. He’s finally graduating. Neither of them said the word date, but it’s a date.

“No, I guess it doesn’t.”

—-------------------

Eddie is initially gunning for Labyrinth, but it occurs to him when they’re about halfway to the front of the line that Chrissy might actually want to make out with him, so he apologizes mentally to the poster of Bowie behind the counter and buys two tickets to the shittiest-looking thing he can find. Back row.

“You want popcorn?” He asks her, all jittery, after the girls hands over their tickets. “I’m gonna get popcorn.”

Chrissy shakes her head.

“That’s ok.”

“Well what if I get a big one? Will you have some?”

“Fine.”

She’s tense. Eddie cracks jokes all the way through the previews and it makes her giggle like always, (especially when the woman sitting in front of her actually has to turn around and shush them)  but when the room goes dark and the movie begins Chrissy’s tense all the same.

She stops paying attention to the plot about twenty minutes in. Eddie’s picked a shitty film to see - some B-movie horror that’s neither scary nor believable. She keeps stealing glances at him. He looks absorbed.

She spends the next twenty minutes working up the courage to do what she’s been willing herself to do this whole time. Without taking her eyes off the screen, she slowly and gently lays her head onto Eddie’s shoulder, breath held in the back of her throat. It takes him a little while to react, going stiff at first and then pulling up the armrest from in between them, pushing it back out of the way and before he wraps a big arm around her, pulling her into his side.

Nothing registers after that - she’s watching the screen but she’s not taking any of it in, too preoccupied with the warm, solid feeling of Eddie’s chest against her back, the weight of his arm looped over her shoulders and the smell of him - the leather of his worn out jacket combined with something a little earthy and woody, but mostly just of boy. This is the closest to him Chrissy’s ever been. Her heart doesn’t stop pounding the entire time.

When the lights come on they shift apart awkwardly, neither one of them saying anything until they’re back in his car, sitting side by side in their seats with red, blushing faces.

“Did you like the movie?” Eddie starts, but he can’t get through it without laughing and now Chrissy is too. She steals a sideways glance at him and has to cover her mouth, fresh giggles threatening to burst out.

“I couldn’t even tell you the plot.” She chokes out, sinking down a little in her seat. She feels hot all the way down to her toes. 

Eddie grins to himself as he looks out of his window, tapping at the wheel as he cranes his neck around the carpark. Nearly empty, he notes. Dark now, too.

He could drive home. But then again…

“Fuck it.”

He cuts the ignition.

Chrissy looks up.

“Chris?” He says, leg is bouncing on the car seat, fingers tapping away as the grin slowly disappears off his face. 

“Yeah?” She breathes.

“C’mere.” 

—-----------

Cold rings skim across the back of her neck as his hands find their way into her hair, getting lost there as he pulls her in impossibly close. The seat is pushed all the way back and she’s sitting in his lap, one knee either side of his own and her hands gripping tight at his t-shirt. He’s taken his jacket off. It’s on the floor, covered in sticky popcorn from the half-empty tub they didn’t finish, kicked over at some point by Chrissy’s foot. Neither of them have even noticed.

Eddie hasn’t kissed anyone like this since he was maybe fifteen - hot and desperate and strewing hickies - hickies - all over, a ruthless land grab on Chrissy’s beautiful shoulders. His own look much the same. It feels immature, but seeing her covered in those purple marks - his marks, it’s unreasonably hot. 

Chrissy hasn’t kissed anyone like this in her life. Not with this much ferocity, this much intensity. Eddie’s kissed away all her lip gloss, her hair is tangled into knots and he’s touching her stomach, her sides, hands coming up under her arms where she knows he can feel she’s all sweaty. All things she absolutely hated when it came to kissing Jason. Things that would make her anxious, take her out of the moment. With Eddie, she doesn’t mind. 

His lips are soft, his tongue tastes like salt popcorn and his stubble feels good scratching against her face. Most of all, his hands feel good - so big and warm and grounding as they cradle the back of her head, her cheeks, her waist.

Eddie feels the crunch of popcorn beneath his trainers and he realises they’ve been in the parking lot for an hour. Chrissy has to be home.

He lets out a deep sigh against her, half contented, half disappointed, as he pulls her in close just one last time before they have to go. Chrissy feels his chest rising and falling like crazy, in time with her own.

“You’ve messed up all my lip gloss.” She whispers into his neck, a comment more than a complaint, and he chuckles. 

“M’sorry.”

After helping her climb back over to her side, Eddie rolls the steamed-up windows down and blasts the heating on cold in an attempt to clear the windscreen. Chrissy picks up popcorn pieces one by one, wiping off her sticky hands on the underside of the passenger seat.

Eddie puts his music on low as he drives her home, one hand tapping on the wheel and the other slung over the back of her seat as he hums along to the tune. The night breeze comes in through the cracked window, tickling her face and soothing the faint stinging around her chin where Eddie’s stubble had been rubbing. She feels blissed out.

“Shitty movie.” Chrissy comments, eyes fixed on her hand, hanging out of the car window and bathed in moonlight. She wiggles her fingers in the gentle wind. “But I like you, Eddie Munson.”

It’s so easy to say it out loud. It feels like something snapped, back there in the parking lot, feels like that for both of them. Something that can never be put back together the way it was. The feeling’s good.

“Maybe next time we’ll just skip the movie.” Eddie says, and his voice sounds so gravelly, so fucking ruined from kissing and kissing and kissing that it makes Chrissy’s stomach lurch. 

“Maybe we will.”

He drops her off at the corner and he doesn’t say goodbye, just leans over to her side and gives her another kiss. 

“I’ll call you tomorrow,” he says as she hops out of the car, hanging back a little while to see her inside. 

Once she’s out of sight, he twists up the volume on the car stereo. He starts the engine back up, and drives the whole way home beaming from ear to ear.

[canirove]

Red & Blue | Chapter 37

Previous chapter | Next chapter

Masterlist

"Leah..."

"Ouch, that hurts. Why are you squeezing my arm like that?"

"I think my water just broke."

"You what just what? Now? Here?" We are at the Emirates watching Arsenal play against Chelsea, the game going on for just five minutes.

"Yes."

"Holy shit, what do we do?"

"Aaron's mum. Tell her to come."

"Ok" Leah says, quickly getting up from her seat.

"What happened, sweetheart?" Aaron's mum says, sitting next to me.

"My water broke."

"Are you sure?"

"I think so, yes. I felt something really tight down there and then... Pop."

"That's the feeling, yes. Can you get up? Walk?"

"What? Isn't that dangerous?" Leah says behind her.

"She'll be fine, the baby won't slide of her or something" Aaron's mum laughs.

"I can get up, but I'll need some help.”

"What is going on?" Georgina says as we leave, Leah helping me walk.

"The baby is coming" I say.

"Oh my God!" she screams, everyone else on the vip area turning around to look at us.

"Is everything alright?" one of the stewards asks.

"She's in labour and we need your help" Aaron's mum says. "We are gonna need one of the paramedics to check on her, and also a private place where she can rest. Is that possible?"

"Of course. Follow me."

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━        

"Well, you were right. You are in labour" the paramedic who was checking me says. We are on a small office, the only one that had a sofa where I can lay and be comfortable. They also have a tv, the game playing on it.

"Oh my God, she's in labour" Leah repeats. "What do we do now?"

"Just wait" the paramedic says.

"What?" she says, raising her voice.

"She hasn't dilated enough, they won't allow her to check into the hospital yet. Were you planning to have the baby at the hospital or at home?"

"At the hospital" I say.

"Then you must wait. We'll have an ambulance ready for you downstairs, and I'll come back to check on you again later."

"Ok, thank you.”

"So... we just wait?" Leah says once the paramedic has left.

"That's how it usually works" Aaron's mum says.

"We should call Mason. Just in case. I'm not leaving without him."

"Can you wait until the half time?" Leah asks.

"Maybe. I don't... Fuck" I say, feeling a contraction.

"You better go find him" Aaron's mum says. "But Leah, tell him to stay calm, ok? He has time to take a shower and get dressed."

"Ok" she says, taking a deep breath before leaving.

While we wait, I try to focus on my breathing and the game. They still are 0-0, so it looks like I haven't missed much.

Just a few minutes after Leah disappeared through the door, the commentators mention that Chelsea’s manager is moving his bench.

"Is there someone injured?"

"Doesn't look like it. Let's wait and see which number they show."

"19? Mount? He seems ok..."

When the camera points at Mason, he looks confused, not knowing what is going on. Once outside the pitch, his manager tells him something on the ear, his eyes going wide.

"Looks like an emergency" one of the commentators says. "He's running towards the tunnel."

"Well, he is about to be a dad. Maybe that's it?"

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━        

"Gorgeous!" Mason says, walking into the office and kneeling next to me. "How are you? Are you ok?"

"I'm fine, don't worry" I say, caressing his cheek.

"Both of you?"

"Both of us. We just..."

"What? What is it?"

"A contraction, sorry. We just need to wait a bit longer."

"You look so calm..." Mason says with a nervous laugh.

"She'll have time to freak out, don't worry" Aaron's mum says.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━        

"Where is that bloody epidural?" I yell.

"They said you aren't there yet" Mason says, massaging my lower back.

"I'm not there yet... Fuck!"

"It's ok, you are gonna be ok."

"I'm not gonna be ok, Mason. I'm not! And this is all your fault!"

"Mine?"

"Yes, yours. You and your stupid dick... I swear it is not getting near me ever again."

"Ok" he laughs.

"Don't laugh!"

"I'm not laughing, love."

"Don't call me love! Fuck! It hurts so much!"

"I know."

"No, you don't! You men know shit about what we go through!"

"How are we doing?" my doctor says, walking into the room.

"I'm starting to fear for my life."

"I heard you, Mason!"

"Ok, let's see if you are ready for that epidural. For the sake of both of you" the doctor says with a smile.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━        

"She's perfect."

"Just like her mum" Mason says, kissing my head.

"Who do you think she looks like?"

"Your mum said she's your copy. And my mum agreed."

"I know, I know. But what do you think?"

"Well..." Masons says, caressing her cheek. "I also think she looks like you. You also pout when you are sleeping."

"What? You've never mentioned that before."

"Haven't I?"

"Nope."

"Maybe that's because I find it so cute, that I want to keep it to myself."

"Aww, Mase" I say, feeling like I'm about to start crying. Again. "But I hope she at least has your dimple. Like Summer."

"The Mount dimple is a strong one, I think all our kids will have it. If you want to have more, of course."

"Why wouldn't I? Look at her. We make perfect babies, Mason. Perfect" I say, gently kissing her forehead.

"Maybe because a few hours ago you said you didn't want my stupid dick anywhere near you?"

"What?" I laugh.

"That's what you said" he shrugs.

"Well, you can ignore that. I wasn't thinking straight."

"Can I call you love again too? Or is that still forbidden?" he asks with that smile of his, making me wish even more that the little one also has his dimple.

"Ignore everything I said. It was the pain speaking, not me."

"Good. Because when you are mad, it is pretty scary."

"Look! She has it!"

"What?"

"The dimple! Didn't you see it? She yawned and she had a dimple! She has a dimple, Mase" I say, starting to cry.

"Aww, gorgeous" he says, laughing and hugging me tighter.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━        

[sassy-seungmo]

Overworked-Bang Chan

chan x reader

genre: angst ig & fluff, established relationship

warnings: none except chan being a bit of a dick

It was ultimately hard to balance, you knew it would be, but never wanting to make a wrong move proved harder and more tolling than originally. When everything was going fine and you and Chan seeing one another was so common, caring for someone was easy when you were getting along without a hitch and they had time for you. Feeling like a walk in the park when you’re both making it that way.

It only begins to feel like nagging when the time you spend together is less and so the worry increases when you are unaware of what the other is doing. The texts of reminders to eat, drink, sleep or simply take time away from the screen can no longer be spoken in person, so the endless stream of messages are physical proof of the constant nagging, if you could call it that. The more he seemed to look at it, the more it frustrated him on the bad days, he had millions of people asking him these questions and treating him like a child, he had convinced himself that he didn’t need anymore.

“You’re being unfair you know,” Jisung’s eyes wide as he blinked confusedly, he had always been under the impression that having someone care for you the way that you cared for Chan was something good, something that would make you feel loved, not annoyed. “She can’t see you to say all of this when you’re both so busy.” To him the concern was warranted, especially considering who she was worrying about.

“It’s all we ever seem to talk about, and this wasn’t how it used to be. I just wonder if she’ll ever stop nagging me, I already have a mum for that.” Chan sighed and turned back around so that he was no longer looking at Jisung, he had turned away from his laptop, not truly being able to focus as his phone had beeped once again, seeing your name he presumed the message was what the last few had been, not realising you had taken time off to go and see him that day.

“Except that your mum doesn’t do that because you hardly see each other and she trusts you to take care of yourself, probably because she doesn’t see you dozing off through the day like we do.” Jisung commented, the door was slightly ajar as you walked towards it, having originally seen Minho and him reporting that father and son like duo were in Chan’s room and you could just go up. “I get why it would be frustrating.”

“She never shuts up about it Hannie, kill me for wanting half a minute where we can talk about something that isn’t how much food I’ve ingested or how much sleep I’ve had. As if I can even control that.” Your hand falls as you were about to knock and you frown at the broad shoulders that admittedly seem tight in stress and discomfort, as well as bad posture from the seat he had been in for what you assumed was too long.

“Right.” The younger boy nodded, turning his head at the feel of eyes on him, they once again widened as he caught sight of you and grimaced apologetically, it was clear that you had heard what had been said about you, and he wasn’t going to try and hide that. “You okay?”

“I’m fine,” Chan responded, making you roll your eyes in exasperation, seating yourself beside Jisung on the couch who was smiling at you sympathetically. He wrapped an arm around you and allowed you to rest your head upon his shoulder. You were already exhausted and now regretted coming to the building once your long day had finished. “It just wouldn’t hurt her to leave me alone for one minute. I have enough on my plate.”

“I wouldn’t..” Jisung trailed off halfheartedly, sharing a look of frustration with you, as well as a bit of disbelief that your presence hadn’t yet been noticed. Quietly you got to your feet and made your way behind your boyfriend, placing your hands on his back, successfully scaring him. It wasn’t exactly what you had in mind, but after what he had been saying, you were more than happy for that to have been a side effect.

“Tell me that you’re not working yourself down to the bone and I’ll stop. Tell me that my texts don’t remind you of the basic human functions that you should be doing but just aren’t.” You spoke, hands finding their way to multiple knots instantly internally you sighed recognising that he's probably acting like this with the stress constantly building up on his tight shoulders.

“Why would you even talk to him?” The shocked question of Jisung, made you laugh under your breath as he excused himself from the room, knowing that they could work on things another time.

“He’s right, you know, I shouldn’t be talking to you right now. I should be crying on his shoulder and cursing you out.” You agreed, still a bit upset over the comments that he had made as you continued your attack on the knots.

“Then why aren’t you?”

“Because I can’t, not when you need someone.” You sighed. “I can stop if you want, Lix just told me that it actually helped you sending them, I thought I was being helpful.” You rested your chin on his head, before he leant his head back and looked up at you. A swirl of emotions appearing in his chocolate eyes.

“I’m sorry.” Chan apologised, you sighed as he didn’t elaborate on that, allowing him to turn the chair around and pull you onto his lap as you moved your hands to now play with the ends of his hair. “I know you just care about me. So much is just happening and I felt like I was falling behind when you were pulling me out of the moment.”

“I’m just trying to help you, I get it. You have so many people worrying about you, I just assumed you didn’t mind. I should have asked.” You said, burying your face into his neck with a deep sigh.

“I’m sorry, it’s just overwhelming sometimes. I should be grateful.” Chan sighs, kissing your head. “I think we don’t see enough of each other anymore.”

“We can change that, even a little bit. Make time for each other.” You suggested, the feeling of being in his arms washing away any doubts that may have started to crawl into your mind.

“We will, I promise.”

master list

[happys-crazy-queen22]

Some Like It Rough

Gif credit @bodybebangin

18+ fic. SMUT SMUT AND MORE SMUT.

Taglist @ackles-nhl. @cbouvier23.

Hope everyone enjoys it.

Happy reading dollies

"I needed you. Where were you tonight"? Kayce sat on the edge of the bed holding his ribs.

"I was out with Beth". You leaned over and grabbed the medical bag.

"For six hours"!? Kayce hissed when you pressed on his side.

"We talked, she drank...a lot. Then we played some pool at the bar". You tell him wrapping his ribs up.

"Meet any guys"? Kayce nibbled on his lip, looking up at you.

"Not this again. I didn't talk to anyone except Beth and the bartender".

"Was he a guy"!? Kayce grunted as he tried to lay down on the bed. You huffed and put the medical bag back in the bathroom.

"Yes, he was. We hooked up in the bathroom while Beth table danced. He also has a wife and a kid on the way". You lied about two things but Kayce didnt care even if you joked. He was jealous.

"I think you should go stay with your parents. We need some time". Kayce sighed, getting comfortable in the bed.

"Why? So you can go fuck every girl you see? Thats what you want? Go for it". You aggressively grabbed your duffel bag and started stuffing your clothes inside. "You wanna know something, the whole time we talked we talked about you and I. Like I couldn't shut up about you. Beth was there ask her. Because I know she wont lie for me". You scoffed and grabbed your keys.

"Y/N, I'm sorry".

"I'm tired of your sorrys. You start a fight and then apologize. We never solve anything. I'm sick of it. That's all we do, since you got back. You need to grow up and figure out what you want whether it has me in it or not. Figure out your shit". You slammed the door behind you. Kayce had a lot to think about. First he hated being alone when he was hurt. He needed comfort. So he went to his big sister.

"So what was this fight about this time"? Beth lit up a cigarette.

"What happened at the bar"? Kayce relaxed in his rocking chair with a groan holding his side.

"We talked and I got a drink. What's all this about? I thought you two were good"?

"We were but I guess my jealousy took over. She came home looking good. Guys must have talked to her. Drooling over her and shit".

"The only guy we talked to was the bartender. He was nice. But married".

"So you didn't table dance"? Kayce chuckled when he figured out he was an asshole.

"Hell no. I'm not that drunk". Beth laughed.

"I think you owe her more than just a shit I'm sorry. You need to fuck her brains out". Beth looked at Kayce seriously.

"I'm not talking about this with you". Kayce gasped getting up from the rocking chair.

"I'm a girl. I know what we want. We want a hard rough fuck and a man that knows what the hell he wants. Not some chicken shit. So grow up and tell that girl you love her. And fuck her brains out". Beth sat back in her chair proudly. She knew her shit.

"Well, it'll have to be a slow fuck cause I'm banged up". Kayce laughed with a hiss.

"Just give her that dick good and she'll know you love her".

"Oh my god. I'm leaving. My sister just said good dick in the same sentence. Have a good night. Thanks". Kayce struggled as he tried leaning over to kiss Beth's head.

"That was the pg version. I could've gone graphic. You know me". She laughed as Kayce shook his head and limped down to his car.

Kayce knew what he wanted. He wanted you. He needed you. Kayce called your cell and nothing. He called your parents, nothing. He was starting to get worried. But he knew you wouldn't go stay with friends cause they would tell so he searched at the hotels around. Only two near the house. One was a nice place and the other was a hole in the wall.

"Is there a Y/N Dutton registered here"? Kayce asked the night clerk at the front desk of the nice place.

The lady typed on the computer. "Sorry no ones named that here".

"Can you try Y/N Y/L/N"? Kayce knew if you didnt use the Dutton last name then you would use your last name.

"She's here. Room 204. But am I allowed to give you her number? You a serial killer or something"? She was hesitant on giving Kayce the key.

This made Kayce chuckle. "No ma'am, I'm her boyfriend. We're in a long distance relationship right now but she's thinking about moving here". Kayce made up something so she would give him the key.

"Alright but if I find her in the morning dead, I saw your face and I will identify you. I'm not scared of you". The clerk pulled out a shotgun.

"Yes, ma'am. That's not going to happen though. You may hear some screaming and moaning but that's not from what you're thinking of". Kayce blushed a little but was honest, he didnt want her busting in and pointing that shotgun at him.

"You do you, boo. Go get your girl". She smiled and patted his hand as she passed him the key. Kayce snickered and started up the what felt like a hundred stairs. He groaned and grunted as he walked up holding his side. In his mind he was just hoping he was able to make you moan and not pass out at your feet.

Kayce knocked on the door. "Who is it"? Kayce heard your voice and smirked.

"Room service". Kayce disguised his voice.

The door opened and his eyes went wide, you cracked the door open in a towel. You had just got out of the shower.

"Kayce, what are you doing here"?

"Um, I, god you're beautiful". Kayce stepped in, licking his lips. He grabbed you by the waist and captured your lips with his. He closed the door behind him with his boot and your towel fell to the floor.

"Kayce"? You gasped when Kayce lifted you up, your legs immediately went around his waist. His calloused hands dug into your back as he kissed you.

Kayces knees hit the bed and he slowly laid you down. He released your lips and stood back.

You closed your legs and covered your chest.  "Don't hide from me". Kayces husky voice made you tremble. Your inner thighs became wet. The heat from your center was radiating off of you.

Kayce smirked as he brought his shirt over his head and threw it across the room. He kicked off his boots and unbuckled his pants, letting them fall to the floor. When he first came he was hurting but as soon as he saw you. What pain?

He was already so hard. He could have hammered a nail with his hard on.

"Open your legs, baby. Let daddy see". Only a few times has Kayce went daddy and every time the night was amazing so you hardly ever done it so it could be special.

You let out a squeak, your legs falling open. Kayce smirked to himself when he saw how wet you were already. He took his middle  finger and touched your clit. You thought you could have came right there. You bit your lip to quiet your moans.

Kayce chuckled, his slipped his fingers through your slit with ease, massaging your with his palm. "You like when daddy does this, dont you"? Kayce evil chuckled. You nodded.

Kayce bent down and got on his knees, he grabbed you by the hips and pulled you to the edge of the bed. He started kissing your inner thighs. His beard tickled, but you loved it.

"Mmm". You started to buck your hips but Kayce held you down with his strong hands.

"Someone's eager". Kayce was inches away from your clit, you felt his hot break on your pussy lips. You felt yourself get wetter.

Kayce took the tip of his tongue and flicked your clit. Making you whimper to be touched.

He flattened out his tongue and pressed hard against your clit and started wiggling his tongue.

"Fuck". You gasped, your hand went to his hair.

He sucked on your clit, his middle and index finger teasing your entrance then slowly pushing in. It was driving you crazy for him not to be rough on you.

"Daddy". You moaned his name and he went faster. It encouraged him to go rougher. His fingers went in deep and rough. His middle finger pushing against your g-spot. "Oh fuck". One hand tangled in his hair and the other one holding on to the sheets.

"I'm gonna cum". Kayce sucked you clit as he looked up at you, his fingers never losing their pace. "I'm cumming. I'm cumming". You screamed over and over as you felt your first orgasm take over your body. It trembled and shaked as he kept fingering. He let go of your clit with a pop. Your hand reached down and stopped his. You couldnt take it.

"Such a good girl for daddy". Kayce grinned smacking his lips as he climbed up your body. He helped you scoot up the bed. His eyes never leaving yours. You let out a giggle, a blush upon your face.

"I just wanted to say...". You cut Kayce off by a kiss to the lips.

"Shut up and fuck me". You pulled Kayce on top of you. Wrapping your legs around him, a knot tied with your legs so he couldnt go anywhere.

"Yes, ma'am". Kayce gladly did as he was told.  He lined himself up and pushed in. God, he stretched you in all the right places.

"Fuck, baby". Kayce mumbled into your skin of your chest. He started kissing along your collarbone, kissing your neck.

Kayce picked up his pace and his  thrusts were deep and long. His hands resting on your back.

"I love you. I'm sorry for being jealous". Kayce spoke between kisses and thrusts.

"I forgive you". You kissed his chest and nibbled at his ear lobe. "I love you so much. Fuck". You threw your head back into the bed when Kayce thrusted in the right angle. God, did he know your body or what.

"You gonna cum again"? Kayce chuckled as he felt you start to squeeze his cock. You let out a whimper and a nod.

"Cum for daddy". Those words sent you straight to the stars. Your orgasm exploded around Kayce. His cock still thrusting as your orgasm still fired away. He was close. So close. Your walls were milking him.

"Fuck". Kayce grunted, his head fell to your chest as he came. His hot seed covered your walls. You wrapped your arms around him and held him as both your orgasms exhausted both of you. You laid there until he went soft and he pulled out of you. Getting under the covers, Kayce pulled you into his arms with a kiss to your sweaty forehead.

"I'm truly sorry that I always let my jealousy get in the way of our relationship. I'm going to work on that. Because I know you would never cheat on me". Kayce said as he cuddled you in more.

"I would never cheat on you, ever. Especially after that. Holy fuck that was amazing. You definitely out did yourself there Mr. Dutton". You giggled, moving a piece of hair from his face.

Kayce chuckled. "You'll have my sister to thank for that. She told me what you wanted".

"So you did talk to Beth and found out that I'm a good girl". You teased.

"I know that's a lie. But I know that you want me and I want you. I was just being bullheaded. I'm sorry".

"I forgive you. Now". You cleared your throat. "How bad are your ribs hurting"?

"Not to bad. Why"? Kayce eyed you.

"I want a ride again, cowboy". You pushed him on his back and climbed aboard the Kayce train. You were never getting off no matter how jealous Kayce was or how angry you were about it. You both loved each other and that wasn't going to change.

[lilyevansisamilf7]

You’re Prettier - Eddie Munson

Warnings - Insecure reader, Eddie being a bit of a dick, oblivious Eddie, angst to fluff, reader is 18

Summary - Eddie’s spending a lot more time with Chrissy lately and his best friend doesn’t know how to feel about it

———————————————————————

Friday nights were always Hellfire nights, Eddie was always adamant about that. “Fridays are when the schools dormant,” he would say, “When everyone goes home the freaks come out to play”

We all knew really that Eddie only held Hellfire on Fridays because his uncle was off, and as much as he loved Wayne, he never knew what to say around him. I got that, we all got that. Which is why we were so surprised when Eddie announced at lunch Hellfire was cancelled today.

“My fine friends, you’re king must cancel our festivities this evening with his greatest sadness”

Dustin started listening for the first time that lunch, “Wait what? What do you mean?”

“You’re finest Dungeon Master has scored himself a deal with the one and only”

“Jason Carver?”

Eddie scoffs loudly. “No.”

I pipe up for the first time since Eddie started talking, “Who then Ed’s?”

“Chrissy Cunningham”

“No you didn’t”

“But I did though”

“She does drugs?”

“No”

I was confused now, majorly. “What does she want from you then?”

Eddie crossed his arms and I knew I worded that wrong, “My company?”

“Im proud of you Ed’s, she’s really pretty”

I stand up and Dustin looks up at me.

“Where are you going Y/N?”

Taking a deep breath, I sigh and say, “I’ve got some homework I need to work on so I’m gonna go to the library and work on it”

“The library?” The surprise evident in his voice

“Yeah. The library”

———————————————————————

I didn’t go to the library. I went home. I just wanted to lay in bed and cry and eat ice cream, but mostly I just want Eddie.

No one knew how i felt about him, no one even asked because I always was good at hiding it, I was pretty touchy anyways so when Eddie held my hand no one questioned anything, and when I leant my head on him no one said anything because that’s just Eddie and Y/N - the best friends that act like they’re ten years married

Which is why it hurt when he said he was seeing Chrissy, because i had no one to call, because in situations like this I would call Eddie, and now i can’t. My mind couldn’t help but wander to the possibility of Chrissy and Eddie dating one day, how I wouldn’t be allowed to hold his hand anymore because that was her job, and I wouldn’t be the one he ran to when more than three people went to his gig, because she’ll be the first on the list.

And I couldn’t help but wonder if she’ll be the type of girlfriend who won’t want him to have a best friend whose a girl, and I can’t help but wonder whether if he’s made to choose, will he choose me?

I mean I wouldn’t. She’s really pretty, and she’s tiny, and rich and she’s a cheerleader and she’s so fucking kind, and so sweet and I can’t hate her no matter how hard I try because all I want is to be her. And I can’t be her.

I couldn’t call Eddie, but I needed someone. So I decided to call Robin. We met last year, she was graduating but we worked together over the summer. We both worked at Scoops Ahoy with Steve but Steve never really liked me as much as Robin did, I never really found out why. But I knew now I needed a friend, and one that wasn’t Eddie.

———————————————————————

I opened the door to find Robin standing there with ice cream.

“My god you’re a fucking godsend Robin Buckley” I squealed, “How do you not have a girlfriend yet?”

“Not many gay people in Hawkins Indiana babe, and if there was I haven’t met them”

“Maybe I’ll turn gay and date you”

“Not sure that’s how it works N/N”

“Will you buy me ice cream whenever I’m sad?” I say grabbing a spoon and pointing it at her.

“Duh, you love ice cream”

“I will marry you then”

Robin just laughs and we both flop down on my couch.

“He didn’t like me Rob”

And that’s when the first tear fell and in seconds Robin was at my side, arm around my shoulder burying my face in her shoulder.

“Who N/N? They must be really dumb”

“Eddie’s not dumb Rob!”

“Oh babe, Eddie’s super dumb if he doesn’t like you”

And I just cried harder at that.

After a while the tears stopped, and I looked up, immediately cringing at the tear stains on Robins shirt.

“I’m sorry I cried all over your boob Rob”

“Ahh it’s fine, most action i’ve got in weeks”

I giggle slightly at that

“Hey, I told you I’d marry you, that’s action” I say pointing at her

She holds her hands up in the air, beginning to walk out the door, “are you gonna be alright alone tonight? I can come back”

“I’ll be fine”

And with that and a closed door, I was alone again.

———————————————————————

I just couldn’t sleep that night. No matter how hard I tried I couldn’t stop my mind from blaring thoughts of Eddie, his hair and his face and how much I just wanted him to make me laugh right now.

As if my thoughts came to life, Eddie burst through my window. He never used my front door.

“Eddie you can’t be here” I breathe, “You have a date”

“I cancelled”

I couldn’t help but turn to face him

“Why?”

It was only now I saw how sad Eddie looked, his eyes sunken in and frown prominent on his face . I just wanted to run up and hug him, tell him that it was all okay, that he’s okay but I couldn’t, he’s with Chrissy. He’s with Chrissy, I remind myself

“Well it was never really a date and even if it was I wouldn’t want to go and I just felt bad because I let down you and the boys and I cancelled Hellfire and I never do that and technically she’s still with Jason so when she went to kiss me I felt dirty”

I honestly had no clue what to say

“And I hurt this really pretty girl this morning”

We sat in silence for a couple of moments

“Ed’s?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you think I’m pretty?”

He turned to look at me and held my face in his hands, looking directly into my eyes.

“You?” He breathes, “You’re the prettiest person on this planet”

“She’s really pretty, like really pretty”

He laughs slightly

“You’re prettier”

And with that our lips finally connected and he was all I tasted. Smoke and chapstick - Eddie. And I felt at home for the first time in a long long time, more at home than I’d ever felt. And then it ended

“I’m sorry that wasn’t how it was supposed to go, I was gonna so you out and tell you I love you an-“

“You love me?”

“Wasn’t that obvious, princess?”

“I love you too” I say with a huge smile on my face

“Will you Y/N be my girl?”

I don’t think I’ve ever smiled so hard in my life

“Yes Ed’s, omg yes”

“My girl”

“Well you have to share me with Robin” I say as we lay down, my head resting on his chest.

“What?” He exclaims

“Long story”

[fancyfade]

raven chronic pain headcanons

brought on from headcanon of @momo-whore about raven having chronic pain, since textually raven does state she still has the pain she absorbed when she heals people.

also crowdsourced some of these headcanons with people in the raven discord

Raven’s pain increases a lot when she joins the titans and starts using her healing powers more often. She didn’t notice it as much on Azarath.

the titans take forever to notice raven has chronic pain because she is very good at hiding it and extremely emotionally repressed and doesn’t want to burden other people with her problems (from her POV), so on bad pain days she locks herself in her room and tells people she’s meditating

Don’t know if this is comics but taking from the cartoon: raven’s room is a sacred, do not enter space, because she doesn’t want anyone to see her at first in what she considers a vulnerable and needy state, but even when she gets more comfortable and accepting of herself she does need a place without anyone else to avoid being overwhelmed, since being in pain makes it harder to deal with overwhelming sensory stimuli (and raven is obviously autistic, too Link)

She knits and crochets (Ok this is also from someone else’s headcanon) but on bad pain days she prefers crocheting because you can stop in the middle of a row on crochet but you can’t stop in the middle of a row when knitting, so if she was knitting she wouldn’t be able to stop when she starts hurting too bad.

Vic shows her some stretches to help with her pain. He also is one of the first people who she opens up to about her pain, because Vic also has chronic pain from his amputations and she can sense it.*

Vic is also the person to convince Raven that it’s not shameful to be disabled (she has the internalized ableism of “yeah its OK for OTHER PEOPLE but it’s insulting/taking away resources from people who really need it if **I** am”). Raven eventually uses some mobility aids on bad pain days, but not until we get the white raven outfit and she’s at the stage where she seems to be allowing herself to admit she can experience emotion.

The Titans are already shown to feel bad when Raven has to heal them, because they know it hurts her (temporarily), but I think they knew she suffered after affects they would be even more reluctant to have her heal them.

She gets a purple cane with flowers on it. When the cane falls down enough that the pain chips, Joey repaints it.

Dick helps Raven go shopping for braces for bad pain days and tells her about when he was recovering from various injuries and used the braces to help. Raven is like “Why are you like this why didn’t you just wait and recover.” dick: “look who’s talking” (thinking of many instances she healed the team when it hurts her)

Raven loves drinking tea and the heat helps a lot especially when her hands are really hurting. If she has a project she wants to knit she’ll set up right near the water boiler

When the titans figure out about Raven’s chronic pain they want to take her off the chore wheel (they also want to take vic off the chore wheel but he is like “U guys do know my pain works differently right”) but she’s still too reluctant to accept help so dick like tries to observe her for a week and see which chores she seems least affected by and has her do those. He has to keep making up excuses for why he’s hanging around and watching her so closely and as an empath she can tell he’s lying but she doesn’t call him on it. He can help take care of her as long as he doesn’t admit he’s doing it so she can pretend its not happening :P

Raven’s comfort food is fruit parfaits and on her worst pain days her friends prepare them for her so she can take her mind off it.

Kory will can heat her hands up slightly with her starbolts and give raven heated massages. We’ll say Raven is probably only comfortable with this level of intimacy after Raven and Kory’s skinny dipping adventure (when Kory was trying to help Raven work through her feelings about Dick).

*I might want to write a post for Vic too but that’s going to require doing more research into amputation and how amputees experience chronic pain and disability