#and i'm just sitting there wiping away tears like a proud mother sending her child to kindergarten like

[fictionadventurer]

Me, constantly: We have books about the presidents at home.

The History Hyperfixation (HH) in my brain, digging in its feet and desperately resisting being dragged away: But you left the McCullough John Adams biography just sitting there at Goodwill. It was only like two bucks!

Me: It was also a jillion pages long.

HH: I know! What a bargain!

Me: You would never actually read it. It would just sit there and stress you out.

HH: You underestimate my obsession.

Me: We can't afford another long book. We've still got Grant's memoirs to finish.

HH: And the Chernow biography of him.

Me: No.

HH: We already read the Kindle preview!

Me: We can't get any other library books until we finish the ones we have.

HH: But Gideon Welles wrote a diary! A primary source right from the center of Lincoln's Cabinet! We can spend more time with our boys!

Me: That library book excerpting Civil War primary sources was a mistake, wasn't it?

HH: What do you mean? Sitting up at 3 am reading the Crittenden Compromise was an excellent life choice!

Me: Interesting, yes. Excellent, no.

HH: Each section only takes a few minutes! You like short things!

Me: All that book will do is inflate our reading list.

HH: I fail to see how that's a problem.

Me, sighing: I need a nap.

[lakeynxmccray]

Glass Hearts

Featuring Gregg and Gabby McCray, @mckennaford @kitblckthrn Trigger warning: coming out, grief, death

All of Lakeyns escape plans had failed but it was time her hospital stay came to an end. She felt as if she was going crazy in there but the only sliver of joy she had was when McKenna visited her. It was their talk that made Lakeyn realize she was done with this life. She was done hiding who she was for the benefit of others. She couldn't take it anymore. She just wanted to be happy and loved by her parents.

These days she was in good standing with her parents. They respected her business efforts and her side pursuit of music, which they did not always support. She felt she was at a point in which she finally made them proud, that they cared. It was when they came to visit her at the hospital, being the first people she woke up to. She was frustrated with their presence but after having them around for a few days things seemed nice. The nurse came in and got Lakeyn ready to be discharged and she could not be happier. She did not hesitate to send a text to McKenna. Today was the day. She would come clean to her parents and they would be together.

The blond was still pretty beat up and such, with multiple bruises, stitches, and a concussion but she walked away fairly lucky. Part of her thanked her brothers for not going easy on her as kids because she knew how to take a beating. It wasn't long before they got her in the back seat of her parent's car and were heading back to the safety of the McCray Mansion. "Hey guys, there is something I really need to talk to you about." She spoke softly as they pulled out of the hospital parking lot.

"I'm seeing someone." She said bluntly. Both her parents brought a smile to their faces. "It's about time Lakeyn, we were getting worried we would never marry you off, so who is the nice guy?" Her mother questioned. But her father knew, they both did but her mother just suppressed it. "Her name is McKenna," Lakeyn said simply. "She is adorable and owns a bakery and is the sweetest person you could ever meet" She explained. Her mother's grip on the steering wheel tightened. "Honey, you are not gay. You can't be. Just let this go."

The rest of the car ride was silent. She felt like she was a child all over again, being dismissed by them time and time over. Pulling into the garage, her mother did not skip a beat to turn the car off and go directly into the house. Her father got out the passenger side door and opened up the back to help Lakeyn out.

The blond quickly wiped the tears from falling down her face, expecting to see an angry expression on Greggory's face but he wasn't mad. "Don't cry Lake." He said before pulling her into a hug. "We already knew and your mother, well she just needs some time. That closet was glass, honey. I've just been waiting for you to tell me." Lakeyns grip on her father tightened as she let out an audible exhale more tears streamed down her face. "I just want you guys to love me for me." She responded. "Stop that Lakeyn, we will always love you. Always. And this girl you have too."

Her father helped her out of the car and into the house, entering through the said door in the kitchen. Hearing the door close her mother called out. "You said Mckenna right?" She shouted from the sitting room. Lakeyn had a confused look on her face. "Yes..? Why?" Her mother stood in front of the tv that was showing the breaking news. "Well she's dead so I don't know how that will work out." She shouted back before retreating up the stairs and out of sight.

"What the fuck is that dumb bitch talking about," Lakeyn muttered, a chuckle from her father, as they entered the sitting room. Lakeyns eyes landed on the tv as suddenly her body went limp, falling down to her knees with a gut-wrenching scream, one that sent shivers down the spine of anyone in earshot. Her father tried to hold her up as she was dropping but ultimately went to the floor with her. His arms embraced her daughter as she whaled on the floor in tears. Like the closed, her heart was also made of glass and before her father's eyes, it just shattered on that floor. Greggory was in disbelief, how could Lakeyn be attacked and now this girl dead, and for his wife to say it in such a way and then leave the room. There was so much going on at this very moment and no one knew how to react.

"Shh baby. It's okay. It's okay." Greggory said as he held his girl, his only girl as he watched the love and joy drain from her body. Seeing her like this broke his heart more than he could ever imagine. Greggory held her tight as she just cried. There was nothing going on in Lakeyns head, all she could feel was pain. Just then she could hear her phone start blowing up with texts and then a call from Kit. "Turn it off, turn it all off." Her father did as requested, shutting off her phone followed by the tv.

[spacebugarts]

Hey I did a drawing and wrote a short ficlet for something that occurs at some point during my Chimera AU for Project Blue Book. Have some depression :)

Reunion

They walked through the dingy lab, Michael's electrified hand serving as a flashlight in the dark. Dread settled into Allen's stomach as he tried not to remember all of the horrors he had suffered through during The Chimera Project.

The two flinched as a mechanical hissing sound rang through the empty halls, sounding far too familiar. Slowly, they made their way to the source of the noise. It was coming from a room Allen didn't recognize— one of the many doors he was never allowed anywhere close to.

What met their eyes was nothing short of horrifying.

Medical tables covered in dried blood, dozens of sharp instruments lined up along the walls, and no shortage of biohazard cleaning stations. What was the most shocking, though, was the large creature suspended in a mysterious fluid within a large tank, lit only by a dim green light.

Allen stepped towards it as Michael examined the tables, shocked. The creature's alien features mirrored his own, large ears and antennae folded back in sorrow, matching the pained expression frozen on its face. The bulbs of its antennae and smattering of freckles, which shone a deep blue in Allen's own reflection, had gone dark. There was no light in the unseeing eyes, and the professor felt a deep sorrow pulling him towards the creature, pressing a hand to the glass.

Suddenly he was swept away by an onslaught of emotion; pain, fear, loss— but, above all, he felt love.

Through the connection he had made with this creature, he felt the love of a mother who had lost her child. The loss of a child she'd never gotten to know, because it was never really hers. He felt her sorrow as she used her last thoughts to send a message to the child she'd never meet.

“My dearest child, I'm so sorry I will never get to know you. I'm so sorry I'll never get to teach you about your home, or your people. There are so many things I want to show you, but I don't have much time left on this plane. I hope you can make your way out of this horrible place, and make a life for yourself worth living; and, if you're ever around to hear this message… I want you to know that I love you. So very, very much. I will always love you. I want you to know how much I love you.”

His hand snapped back, tears he hadn't realized he'd shed falling down his face. Michael walked over, looking up at the tank.

“Woah… the hell is that thing?”

“My mother…” Allen muttered, voice breaking. By now, the tears he was shedding were his own as he realized what they'd found. This was the room where he was made. Where they took this creature's DNA and forced it into him, forcing some poor woman to foster a child she'd never know. The bloody table was where he was removed, the sink on the wall where he was cleaned off before being thrown into a metal crib and treated like a science experiment for most of his life.

“Oh my god, Doc, I'm so sorry, I— I didn't—”

“No, it's ok, I just…” He paused, wiping the tears from his face. “Her last words… she told me she loved me. She used her last words to tell me she loved me…”

“She did? You mean with your weird... telepathy thing?”

Hynek nodded, a sob wracking his shoulders as Michael wrapped him in an embrace, letting the hybrid cry into his shoulder.

“Allen, I'm so sorry, I— I shouldn't have made you bring me here, I shouldn't—”

“N— no, it's… I'm glad I came back. I'm glad I got to… at least now I know. That she loved me.” He sniffled, pulling away and wiping his eyes. “I'm glad I at least got to hear her say she loved me.”

Michael pulled him out of the room, sitting him down in the hallway and listening intently as he explained what he felt. He described her voice, and what he saw in her fragments of memories. She'd died in pain, but she was glad that she had at least been able to see her son. Just once.

He cried because he would never get to know her, or see the place she called home, or learn about the culture he had come from. He cried because he wished she had been there to see him grow up, to guide him as he chased the stars. He cried because he should have tried to break her out with him. Because he had come back too late.

“Well, I can't tell you much, but I do know one thing.” The captain paused, intertwining their hands and wiping a stray tear from Allen's cheek, freckles glowing a dark indigo. “She'd be damn proud of you, Doc. She'd be proud that you got out, that you dedicated your life to finding out who you are and where you came from. That you studied the stars because they were what you were passionate about… that you found someone else that loves you even half as much as she did, and that you made yourself a life you're happy in.”

Michael leaned forward, pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead and coaxing a smile from his lips, tears still dancing in his eyes.

"Thank you Michael... Can we get out of here now?" Allen asked, earning a laugh from his partner as he guided them out of the lab, a large weight seemingly lifted from their shoulders.