#and i’ve bought a new donald plush

[aimseytv]

we found another photo booth

[duhragonball]

🌻

So I finally remembered to order some new T-shirts.   I used to buy blank T-shirts at the store, but for a while Target used to carry Gildan brand T-shirts which I found more comfortable for some reason.  Then they stopped carrying them for no apparent reason, and I realized that I didn’t need to put up with this bullshit anymore because I could just order Gildan shirts on the internet.    This was what led me to blankshirts.com

I always hated shopping for clothes as a kid, because all I wanted to wear were blank t-shirts, and my mom would drag me around making me look at all this useless horseshit with stripes and paisley patterns and button-down stuff and I hate all of that, I just want solid colors with no long sleeves or any other bells and whistles.  So now I just place a bulk order for forty Gildan T-shirts, and I wear them for like 18 months until I get sick of them and want to order new ones. 

I see people wax nostalgic about their childhoods, and I almost never get it because everything was a pain in the ass when I was a kid.  You couldn’t just get new pants, you had to go to the store and try them on.    Now I just know what number Levis I like and the two numbers that go with that, and I can order them over the computer.  I don’t need to clear any of this with my mom, or listen to her tell me “that’s tacky” or “you can’t just wear the same five colors of T-shirts over and over”.  

You know, I used to wear only black T-shirts for a few years.   My apartment got flooded and I was in a mood over it, and I started buying new clothes and figured “Well, I’ll just stick to one color for a while,” and the world didn’t end and the fashion police never found me.   Eventually I expanded the palette to stuff like “forest green” and “maroon” but it’s not that complicated.   I could have done this all along, but I had to get old enough to figure out how. 

I do like going to the Men’s Wearhouse, because even though I’m not a suit and tie guy, they talk to me like a peer and they don’t waste my time with stuff I don’t care about.   They’re like, here’s three shirts that would go with this, and I pick two.   Here’s some tie options.   I’ll take that one.    Done.  It’s doesn’t have to be this weird guessing game where you hope that “the right answer” and “what you actually want” are the same thing.  

I was reading about Donald Trump’s shitty Boeing 757 plane and he got like gold-plated everything.   To me, that’s stupid, because the place still looks like a jet airplane with couches in it, but now all the door handles and faucets are gold-plated, and then some bulter comes out serving Fillet O’Fish sandwiches, probably.   But I can respect having things your own way.   In the end, nobody really cares, so if you can afford it, go for it.   If I had my own private jet, I guess I’d have some cool Dragon Ball Z shit painted on the side, and maybe the airplane painting people would exchange funny looks behind my back, but they’d shrug and do it anyway, because I’m paying for it.  

I’m sort of shifting subjects here, but Trump’s plane reminds me of how I used to look up superyacht photos because I wanted some inspiration for Luffa’s spacship.   In the fanfic, she... ahem... acquired a pleasure craft from some rich dude, and the whole gag with that was that it was far too luxurious for her to appreciate.   I considered having her rip out all the plush decor, except she wouldn’t even care enough to bother with that.    Rich Corinthian leather sits just as well as cheap upholstery.  If she was running low on cash she could rip out some of the gold-plated decorations and sell it for scrap, but otherwise it’s just there, unappreciated. The new owner sleeps in the fitness center on Deck 4 and she spilled barbecue sauce on the 90000-count silk sheets.

The thing I quickly learned about super-yachts was how utterly unimpressive they really are.   You expect to see something mega-fancy, like a James Bond movie hideout, but it just looks like stuff you’d find in a moderately fancy home, except they put it on a boat, so that makes it more luxurious.   Oh, here’s a movie theater on this yacht.  It looks like a bunch of armchairs and a big screen TV like I’ve seen in furniture stores and electronic stores, only someone bought all that stuff and put it in one room and it’s on a boat.    The closest I ever saw to a truly fancy thing was a bay inside a superyacht where other, smaller boats were kept.   Which sounds cool, at least, but why would you want to leave your big fancy boat to screw around in smaller boats?

You read about this stuff, and it starts to feel like rich people already have it their own way, and they’re so used to it that they don’t know what else to want, so they start buying stuff like boats with smaller boats in them.   Muammar Gaddafi used to have this all-female boyguard staff, which sounds like this cool, over-the-top supervillain thing, but he probably got bored with it after a while, and where do you go from there?

Anyway, I’m just glad I can order these blank shirts without having to beg a Target store to carry them.    I’m simple that way.