#and i will literally die if i don't have something tonight

[princess-kittyxoxo]

Wanna know what my favorite type of appliance is?

Great! I'm so glad you asked, let me tell you.

It's the kind that doesn't come with instructions, seems to require two people to set up for literally no reason at all, becomes its own workout routine, and takes such a chunk of skin out of my finger that the entire appliance becomes a fucking biohazard.

[izzy-b-hands]

Trying to make my brain do anything today has just been case after case of 'well, half-assed is better than nothing I guess.'

[youremyonlyhope]

There is a nonzero chance that I have COVID.

Yayyyyyyyy.

Let's hope it's just a cold...

[pathofelation]

i keep remembering i'll be going into emergency medicine and i am filled with both so much joy and so much fear. like.. woah dude.. i was not expecting to get this far. you mean i'm really gonna do that? you mean i am given the privilege to help people like that? you mean i am given the chance to be in a position to serve my community and the people around me in such a tangible way? you mean the kid i never got to be would be happy to see me now? like woah.. hey there.. let me sit down for a second that's a lot.

ignore the essay i wrote in the tags. it's a night /humorous

[muppetebbtide]

trojan war tumblr simulator

🌊 is-the-sea-wine-dark-today

YOU BET IT IS

#the wine dark sea!!!!!!!!!!!! #wine dark sea #wine dark sea posting

108 notes

✌🏻 ajax2electricboogaloo follow

why is achilles the only demigod who's Like That? like he's my boy but u don't see memnon or aeneas or sarpedon acting like him on the reg. why is he so maladjusted? like specifically? I saw his mother once and was so terrified by the sight of a goddess I flung myself to the ground and hid my face in the dirt til she left but I still don't think that accounts for it idk

🏘️ nobody1020

it's blonde man syndrome hope this helps

340 notes

⚔️ sonoftydeus

opening my askbox so that we can discuss strategies on taking troy!

3 notes

anonymous asked: we should all go home :)

⚔️ sonoftydeus answered:

FUCK OFF AGAMEMNON I WANT REAL SUGGESTIONS

50 notes

nobody1020 asked: do u like..... horses

⚔️ sonoftydeus answered:

odysseus do I even wanna know where this is going

45 notes

⌛ isthetrojanwaroveryet?

year 9, day 234: still no....

#all our admins keep DYING

500 notes

‼️ trojan-confessions follow

I think my wife might be sending me anon hate :/ keep getting asks like 'hope u die on the battlefield tomorrow silly slag' and 'menelaus should have curbstomped you' and in her big tapestry of warriors she made me look stupid

🐴 horsetaminghector follow

lmaooo is this paris??

🔮 cryinglikecassandra follow

kinda think helen should send MORE anon hate idk

600 notes

❓ myrmidons-confessions

I was the one who wrote the achilles/agamemnon 100k slowburn enemies to lovers rpf and put it on the group chat but now patroclus is calling me 'agachilles boy' and laughing about it and asking if I can proofread his mock bardic epic where all his dogs are heroes and killing people, so I fear I've made a mistake. I also can't look achilles in the eye anymore... but honestly I've never seen proof he can read so I might be safe

❓ myrmidons-confessions

5000 notes

👑 kingofmycenae

👍🏻 ajaxthegreat

achilles is DEAD and ur posting CRAB RAVE?????

🏘️ nobody1020

I think that's why he's posting it ngl

300 notes

😹 deiphobus42069

imagine being the achaeans and your best warrior gets killed by PARIS, after everyone else had awesome deaths at the hands of sarpedon or hector or memnon... like that's literally so embarassing I just know achilles is fucking fuming down in hades rn. I bet the achaeans are gonna put around that paris was guided by apollo, or that paris happened to hit his only weak spot..... anything 2 try and make it less cringe.... lol lol we're popping the biggest bottles tonight. hope helen's there

🐆 leopardskiniscool

???????????????

#I mean. yeah. but also. #deiphobus wtf I thought we were chill

240 notes

#hope everyone can be normal about the outcome!!! :)

340 notes

🧑🏻 randotrojansoldier-deactivated-8578543

so excited to go back onto the field of battle tomorrow! sure hope I don't encounter any of the big-name heroes

🗣️ homer follow

I hope you don't too! I'm sure you'll do great!

🐎 antilochussss

not the direct address????

✌🏻 ajax2electricboogaloo

direct address got him :(

3000 notes

💂🏻 trojanguardtales follow

fuck my job so much I hope that this wooden horse tribute to the gods turns out to have some guys inside or something just so I can DO something rather than standing here like a twat with my spear

💂🏻 trojanguardtales follow

by ares this can't be happening

345 notes

⚔️ sonoftydeus reblogged menelauskingofsparta

do NOT order achilles from shein!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#oh yeah #I was stuck with temu achilles in the trojan horse for six hours #and by hour two agamemnon had suggested killing and eating him #and odysseus was threatening to 'send him to meet his father' #and it's not even like there's any kleos in killing priam!!! #anti neoptolemus #neoptolemus defenders dni #vent tags

100 notes

[urhoneycombwitch]

eddie x latebloomer, virgin reader (so not self-projecting...) who isn't innocent or typically what people say is "virginal" (because virginity is a construct!) but still gets super nervous about heavy petting/sex because they've never done it before and don't want to be bad or weird and literally just flees at the confrontation

until that ovulation hits and r! is trying so hard to ignore it, squirming on Eddie's couch/bed and he's like 🤨 you ok? and then it just comes out in a whole word vomit that he's super hot and they're absolutely soaked but don't know what to do and it probably won't be good and they should just go home and eddies like... no big deal, I'll just eat you out, no penetration 🤷🏻

and when they do actually have sex later, I know Eddie talks R through it

ty for suggesting this anon! u got me inspired here's a lil blurb. also dedicated to @wdsara48 who asked for more inexperienced!reader content 🫡

+18 mdni: Eddie’s a bit clueless about the hormone cycle, oral (r receiving), cumming in pants (guess who), ovulation horny (™)

____________

On second thought, it was probably a really bad call to visit your boyfriend when you were this horny.

Which sounds silly, you know it does- who wouldn't want to visit their hot boyfriend at a time like this?- but you've really been enjoying taking it slow this time around. Eddie is the first boy you've dated who has totally and completely earned your trust when it comes to sex- he's never once pressured you to take your heated make-out sessions any further, pulling back and unwinding himself from you with spit-slick lips every so often to gauge your comfort level.

Is this okay? How are you feeling? Wanna take a break?

So kind. So considerate. So far away, in the kitchen, humming to himself while he fixes dinner, hair loose and curling around the shoulders of his tight Metallica tee. Every time he reaches over to stir the pot of chili on the stove, the lean muscles in his upper back and biceps curl and flex.

Hormones are flushing hot through your body, the couch you’re seated on feeling more and more confining by the second; you cross your legs at the ankle in an attempt to stave off the fidgeting, but when this causes the thick denim of your zippered jeans to press into the ache between your legs you are quick to uncross them again.

There’s a low-toned buzz that’s taken up residence in your hearing, like all the raging horniness has no place else to go- which is why you don’t hear Eddie the first time he speaks.

He’s standing at the edge of the living room now, hands on hips, one dark brow raised in your direction- “Earth to angel. You with me?”

“Huh?” You swallow harshly against the dryness in your throat (contrasted with the excess wetness in other places) and shake your head, slipping your hands underneath your thighs to sit on them and ground yourself a bit. “Sorry, I was zoning out. What’d you say?”

“I said you seem antsy tonight,” Eddie repeats, moving in to sit next to you, close enough for your knees to touch. “Had too much coffee or somethin’? Y’know, you really shouldn’t drink that stuff after noon. Not good for ya.”

He’s teasing, all smooth movements with an easy grin as he snakes an arm around your shoulders.

The smoke-sweet smell of his cologne floods your senses- musky and heady and this underlayer of something earthy, wild, that you could swear hits on a primal nerve by the way it makes your clit throb.

When you stiffen under Eddie’s arm, he reads your signal as one of discomfort, tsking at himself underneath his breath before starting to pull away. “Sorry, sweetheart, didn’t mean to make you-”

“No!” Your hand darts out to grab at his over your shoulder, keeping him from leaving, because if the warmth of his body pressed to your side stops you might actually die. “No, it’s not you. I promise. It’s me. I’m…”

Eddie watches you with mild concern as you flounder, mouth opening and shutting a few times before settling on just the truth- “I’m ovulating.”

He blinks. “Um. Shit. Do you need to go to the doctor? ‘Cuz the main office is definitely closed this time ‘a night but the ER is for sure open-”

You bend at the waist, pitching forward with a groan and cutting him off. With hot cheeks buried in your hands, your voice comes out muffled- “Didn’t you take sex ed, like, three times?”

“Sure did. Learned basic anatomy real well.” His palm has slid to your lower back, your shirt ridden up to expose a stripe of skin that his warm hand now rests on. “Help me out, princess. What’s goin’ on?”

With a pounding heart, you manage to sit up, looking down at your hands in your lap as you whisper, “Ovulation makes me, like, super horny.”

At first, you think he didn’t hear you, but after a beat of silence there’s a subtle shift in his posture, spine straightening.

“Oh.” Eddie’s hand on you doesn’t move but his other one smoothes down the line of his jean-clad thigh, clearing his throat before asking, “And do you wanna… do something about that?”

Mustering courage, you swivel slightly to look at him- the joking tone from earlier has drained out of his voice, and this is the shyest you’ve ever seen him: staring unseeing at his own lap, plucking at the knee of his jeans.

“Like what?” You ask, matching the same low tone he’s just used.

When Eddie looks back at you, that’s when you realize your mistake- his lack of eye contact wasn’t due to shyness. The way he’s looking at you now, dark chocolate eyes holding a steady gaze, it’s a wonder he’s been so restrained this whole time. 

“Could eat you out. Only if you wanted, though.”

You shiver. Visibly. 

A slow, half-tilted smile pulls at Eddie’s lips; he brings your free hand to his face and kisses your knuckles, then tugs you up with him to stand.

“C’mon. Let’s go to the bedroom.”

Cast in soft lamplight, Eddie closes the door to his room before cupping your face in his hands, cool rings against your cheeks. He kisses you gently, at first, plush lips notching in steady rhythm against yours; when you tug him in closer by his waist and slip your tongue between his teeth, he groans into your mouth.

He pulls away, wet click of your separating mouths loud in the quiet of the room before giving your hip a light tap. “Up on the bed, angel.”

You’re quick to comply, crawling backwards on the duvet, lust unfurling in your stomach as you rest half-propped on your elbows.

Eddie divests himself of his shirt in one fluid motion without taking his eyes from you. His pale skin gleams in the low light, silver chain and guitar pick necklace swinging as he moves to hover over you.

“You okay?” He asks, dark hair a curtain around both your faces as his bare torso presses against your clothed one. 

When you nod, he ducks to kiss you again before sliding a hand up your shirt. “Good. ‘Cuz I don’t think I could stop even if I wanted to.”

You know he’s mostly joking- you and him have a safeword, and he’s always attentive to your body signals- but the pure desire that he’s kissing and touching you with is indicative of a boy who’s waited too long to be able to have you like this.

Eddie laps at your mouth, tongue twining with yours as his hand squeezes and molds the fat of your breast through your bra as both your nipples stiffen in response. When his knee slots between your thighs, you moan, hips jolting up to chase the friction.

“Can I…” you’re panting, forehead crushed to Eddie’s as you search for the words. “I want your mouth, on me- please.”

You’re rarely ever so communicative, usually hidden away behind a wall of reservations that are totally melted away now. Eddie makes a noise like he’s been punched, sucks at a spot behind your ear that causes your hips to rock forward again, then says, “Yeah, sweetheart, yeah. You can have my mouth. Fuck.”

While he kisses down the slope of your neck, between your clothed breasts, your bare stomach where your shirt’s been rucked up, he’s muttering (to himself, to you, hard to say): “‘Course you can have my mouth. Have it wherever you want it. Christ. Should’a asked for it sooner. Give you anything you want.”

Eddie pops the button on your jeans and you lift your hips so he can pull them completely off your body; when he sees the wet patch of arousal darkening your baby blue underwear he chokes out another curse before working the fabric down your hips and tossing them to the ground.

“Gonna let me taste you, baby?” he asks, stretching his lower half out on the mattress and pulling your legs over his shoulders, his mouth inches from your soaked core. Eddie looks up at you, face bracketed by your thighs, pupils blown out with desire, waiting for your go-ahead.

“Please,” you murmur, stretching out a hand to pet at the crown of his head.

His eyes flutter shut for a moment with your touch; when he presses a kiss to the top of your cunt, your hand tightens in his hair, his resulting hum of encouragement vibrating against your clit.

Eddie flattens his tongue and licks a wide stripe up your folds, spreading the wetness from your leaking hole up to mouth sloppily at your clit; when he sucks the bundle of nerves into his mouth, your elbow supporting your half-propped frame gives out and you pitch back against the covers.

“There- ah- shit, there, Eddie…” you sound wrecked already, voice husked with the strain of holding back whines. Normally, you’d be so in your head about the exposing condition you’re in, but at this point you’re too wound up to care, Eddie’s tongue against the beating heart of you coaxing that tightness in your stomach closer and closer to snapping.

His nails bite in where his hands span the width of your thighs, holding you against his mouth even as your legs tremble and hips twist jerkily with each sweep of his tongue; Eddie gives one last suck to your clit then follows the line of your cunt down, down with his tongue to prod at your sodden entrance.

When his tongue slides into you with a wet squelch, obscenely loud in the otherwise quiet room, you both moan in tandem- your hand in his hair tightens to near-brutal, and the bed underneath you both tremors with the jolt of Eddie’s hips rutting into the mattress.

He sets a steady pace with his tongue, fucking it in and out of you as his nose nudges against your clit. That coil in your stomach is starting to make all your muscles tense up, your thighs locking Eddie in place (who seems to only be spurred on with each constriction of your body).

“Gonna come?” The lower half of his face is coated in your slick as he takes a brief pause to kiss at your inner thigh, one hand coming to rest on your tummy, pinning you down. “C’mon, baby. Let me see it.”

Your body obeys, tension snapping as his mouth returns to your cunt, a high whine of “Eddie Eddie Eddie” that you don’t bother to hide this time loosening from your throat as everything around you bursts and crashes into orgasm.

Toes curling against Eddie’s lower back, cunt spasming around his tongue, Eddie fucks you through it and then some, his own hips mindlessly grinding down as your release triggers his own, spilling warm into his boxers while your high spirals out.

When the spams of your pleasure turn over into aftershocks, Eddie comes up for air, pressing one last kiss to your overstimulated cunt before crawling up your body to lie on top with his head in the crook of your neck.

“Fuck,” you say aloud to the ceiling, breathless, arms automatically encircling the boy. “Holy shit.”

“I’ll say.” Eddie’s breath cools over the sticky patch he kissed into your skin, his mouth still wet with your release. He gathers enough energy to plant his elbows on either side of your head, looking down at you, suddenly serious. “So um… how often do you get ovi- ovel… like this? Once a year or somethin’?”

The laugh shakes out of your chest before you can stop it; you reach up to tuck Eddie’s curls behind his ears, your previous bashfulness having been tongue-fucked out of you.

“Eddie Munson, do I have news for you.”

[webslingingslasher]

IM GLAD YOURE GOOD <333

also whilst we’re here. you know how girls get scary horny right before their periods? like i need to be tied to a tree like a wolf when im ab to get mine JDJDJDJ

peters never had a gf before trouble and the first time it happens he fr thinks he’s in HEAVEN. he doesn’t understand but she’s just on him 24/7 and he’s living for it. but also confused bc he can’t think of what he’s done differently to have u pouncing on him 24/7 but he’s not complaining djdjdnd

BOYFRIEND FRAT!PETER LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOO

-i've literally had this done for like two months but i got scared and let it collect dust. not anymore bby!!!-

for the fourth time today, peter tilted his shoulder towards his face to sniff his shirt. it smells just fine, it's clean cotton. he didn't get a new fabric softener so it couldn't be that, and it's not like he got a new cologne or soap.

peter couldn't place it, but something about him lately has you absolutely feral. especially today, he almost had to peel you away from his skin so he could go to class.

'i missed you so much,' you moved quicker than peter's ever seen, his feet haven't even come to a stop on the pavement before you're kissing him.

it becomes more sensual than he's willing to provide in public.

'it was an hour, trouble. what'd you do, wait for me?' peter meant it in a teasing way, he didn't expect you to nod quickly. 'yes. you're about to open your instagram to thirty messages, i'm so sorry.'

your palms race over his arms, something about him seems ultra soft today. in the least joking way possible, he really does feel like boyfriend material. and he was all yours.

'did you know i love you? like, so much.' he did, but he still loves to have a reminder. 'i love you so much it's uncool.' you've got a glazed look in your eye.

peter knows that look and if he's being honest, he's done nothing to deserve it. the last two days you haven't been able to keep your hands off him.

is this what people mean by the honeymoon phase?

'i love you too, trouble. what's got you so mushy recently?'

puffed cheeks, no regard and absolutely no reason to hold back. 'i just really wanna fuck you.' peter takes a sharp breath, something about you being bold makes his knees weak. it must be his desire to please.

'i would, i really, really would...' with gentle scratches up and down the back of your arm, you know he's setting you up for a no. you whine and pout up at him.

'no! you're not allowed! just say yes, please say yes!'

it's literally tearing him up inside. 'baby, i'm already going to be late for my library session. i also have a chapter meeting tonight.'

'do you really-'

'yes.' there was no way he'd be budging on that one. peter made you know you were number one priority, frat responsibilities sat right under you.

if he was suggesting you'd have to wait until late, or worse, the next day, you'd die.

'what about after the library? before the meeting?'

peter's never seen you so persistent. he really doesn't know what he's done, but he won't complain one bit. he'll be a little crunched for time, but that's no reason to let you down.

'if we use your dorm, yes, i think we can make it work.'

peter’s forced to balance himself, you attacked him with a bear hug and nuzzled into his chest. ‘thank you, thank you, thank you! i’ll tell my roommate right now!’

seconds tick. he’s already late and you’re not moving, keeping him in your grasp while your thumbs fly across your phone to send out a message.

‘trouble, you’re making me late.’ because you’d be offended if he pushed you away.

a finger is held up, ramped texting takes priority. ‘trouble,’ the second you feel yourself pushed to the side you huff up at him. 'don't toss me off to the side like i'm some toy, i'm your girlfriend.'

'you're not a toy, you're just not listening, therefore making me late.'

your arms cross over your chest, 'fine. whatever, go.' peter is nowhere in the wrong, but you're making him feel like he is. if this was before, he could just walk away. but now, he has to pause and address your concerns.

he's still adjusting to boyfriend duties.

'don't get mad with me, i'm being very nice.' he is, he even let you gently bully him into getting him into your room in an hour and a half. you hold your stance, it takes a few seconds, but he catches on.

'you're not mad, you're pouty. don't be pouty, you're gonna see me in an hour.'

a toddler grumble, 'i'm gonna miss you too much.'

peter really doesn't know where the sudden desperation came from, he really needs to check in with you, but if he's any later, he's gonna piss off a whole room of people.

'i'll miss you too, trouble.' it appeases you enough, you finally allow him to pass. peter isn't able to go a full three steps until you tell him to wait, he realizes his mistake.

'sorry, c'mere.' three quick kisses, you make it hard to pull away. 'love you,' he allows you to sneak another kiss. 'love you too, petey.'

—-

one thing you loved about peter was that he was always on time, at least for you he was. just like he promised, he was at your door an hour and a half later with a hand on his stomach.

‘i’m missing dinner for this, i could be having a nice catered meal with the boys, but no, it wasn’t allowed.’

‘that’s very kind of you, handsome.’

‘i just needed to let you know, you know, in case i go lethargic or my stomach starts growling.’

‘as long as you don’t pass out on top of me, gerald’s game scared me.’ peter holds his fingers up in a scouts honor, ‘i promise.’ it’s all it takes, you reach for his shirt, clenching the fabric, you tug him in. shutting the door and slamming him against it, your lips on his in a minute.

peter’s mind is spinning, he’s never been pushed up against a wall. it feels nice, it’s a good feeling to know someone wants him so badly a tinge of aggression comes with it.

your kisses trail over his jawline, you’ve never been so desperately horny in your entire life, something about him has you dialed to ten recently. it could be the impending period, but that just feels like a fraction of the reason.

feeling slightly guilty you’ve ruined his meal plan, you pull back, just for a second to rip his shirt off. when his skin is shown, your hands race over it, he’s toned, and tanned, and down right delicious.

you scatter kisses over his chest, peering up at him. ‘are they saving you a plate?’ peter looks down, he’s lost at your words. you’re asking about plates while worshiping his body?

‘huh?’ a trail of wet marks across his collarbone.

‘dinner. are they saving you a plate?’

how do you expect him to answer while you nibble a bruise on the bottom of his neck? ‘i don’t…’ peter takes a sharp inhale, he never knew he had a sweet spot until you found it. it’s behind his ear, and he has to lean down, just slightly, but it’s so, so worth it.

‘i don’t know, probably not. guys don’t think about stuff like that.’

you pull away with a pop, raising your thumb to brush over the red mark. ‘hold on,’ you turn for your phone abandoned on your bed, on the walk over you take your own shirt off.

it’s a quick text and a quicker response, your guilty conscience cleared. ‘done. ethan said he’ll save you one.’

‘my hero.’

you jump to your bed, shimmying your pants off before sitting up on your knees, you get into position, shaking your hips at your boyfriend before arching slightly.

‘are we thinking doggy?’

peter’s still stuck to the door, ‘you wanna start with doggy? what happened to foreplay?’

you move to your back to tug your underwear off, you were only following his words. ‘you said we would be strapped for time, i’m making it easier.’

‘by blowing past the most important thing and having me jam it into you?’

you narrow your eyes at him, ‘once upon a time you didn’t care about foreplay.’

‘that’s old peter, he’s dead.’

‘let’s revive him.’

peter finally steps away from the door, he feels ten times warmer. his arms move around like he’s trying to clear the air, ‘alright, hold on, we need to talk.’

four words that are forced to put the night on pause, he could wait for a heart to heart after. ‘let’s not.’ you reach for his jeans, he steps out of reach. ‘peter! you were the one that said it would be a time crunch, i’m doing my best here, let’s go.’

‘not until you tell me why you’re so possessive lately. this whole week, you can’t get enough of me. what’s going on?’

peter’s starting to think you have some doubts running through your head and if you have enough of yourself to him he’d stick around. it’s a bogus idea but you’ve done it before to him, maybe it’s worse because there’s more to lose now with the title.

‘i’m horny.’ there wasn’t much else to add. he’s just made you wildly needy this entire week, but peter wasn't buying it. with crossed arms he waited until you really told him what was going on.

you groan, the quicker you explain, the quicker you get what you wanted. 'fine, what do you know about the menstrual cycle?'

'as little as possible.' while he's slightly more knowledgeable than most men his age, everything he's learned has been against his will.

'great. i just got off mine two weeks ago, i'm ovulating, aka, my body wants a baby real bad. not just any baby, your baby, that's why i'm so horny for you.' you hope it's enough to appease him, you shuffle around on the bed.

'fucking in this bed sucks.' there's little room for peter but you did what you could with the space you had. 'also, expect this monthly. cause, it's gonna be your problem now that you're my boyfriend.'

peter breathes deep, 'that has got to be... the best problem i've ever had in my entire life.' peter moves so quickly your head spins, he's on his knees in front of the bed while you're pulled to the edge.

kisses up the inside of your thigh has you pulling at his hair, 'peter, you're gonna be late.' you suck in hair as he nibbles on your skin. 'we don't have time for this.'

it pauses him, peter looks up into your eyes, a cocky smirk forms. 'my girl has a primal urge, and it's my job to take care of it.' 

[joontroverted]

kiss it better (nsfw)

husband! ran haitani x wife reader

fandom : tokyo revengers

word count : 2.9k

cw : anal beads, anal fingering, vaginal fingering, penetrative sex, daddy kink, reader is a brat, impregnantion talk, fluff! this is a sweet fic, i'll have you know 😤

twitter porn that inspired me!

video

happy reading!

ran comes home late often enough that it's not an issue.

his schedule is erratic. he doesn't work every single night, but when he's called to work he's gone, and almost unreachable too. and he's definitely coming home late on those days.

between the two of you (two sleepy people) he knows it's no hard feelings to come home to you fast asleep. he just strips off, does a quick shower, speedruns through his unskippable skin care routine and settles into bed with you. one arm snaked around your waist and into your panties, two fingers in your warm pussy, and he's out like a light.

it's a fun routine.

but you miss him.

sure, you have the sleepy mornings and the evenings filled with wine and whichever new little snack ran had flown in from God knows where, but you missed the nights.

the nights of opening your arms and legs for your man, undressing him, tumbling around in bed till you're both sore and filthy and then hopping in the tub for another round- ahem, a bath.

so tonight's the night!

you're adorned in a light blue lingerie set, the type that highlights your titties and has a crotchless panties. your usual home clothes are thrown on on top of this sexy get up because of the chill from the ac, and even though you've fought back many a yawn, the moment you hear scuffling and the beep of the lock, you throw off your loose clothes and position yourself spread across the sofa.

you watch as ran staggers into the foyer, stumbling, stifling a yawn. he makes a beeline past the hall and straight to the master bedroom without paying you even the slightest glance.

you sit there dumbfounded.

you can hear him tossing off his clothes, washing his face and finally turning the lamp by the nightstand on to do his skin care before he realises you're not in bed.

"sweetheart?"

you hear him jog out of the room, turn the corner and seeing you sitting on the sofa, all (sex) dolled up, and glaring holes into him.

"what are you- oh," he stops, eyes taking you in. "oh honey, come here," he calls you, spreading his arms.

you stare at him and get up, and walk past him to your bedroom.

"honey? honey! baby, i'm so sorry, it's so late and it's been such a long day, this has nothing to do with- "

"literally die," you mutter, clambering onto the bed.

"are you wearing those crotchless panties?"

"die! go hang out with your precious besties! die!" you hiss, wrapping the blankets around yourself and settling in.

"baby- "

"i don't want to hear one fucking word ran haitani."

you shut your eyes, turning your face into the pillow, tears of anger stinging behind your shut eyelids. god, this was so humiliating more than anything. you were so excited, and the worst part is you can't even blame him, you know how tiring his days can get.

you hear him slowly sit down on the bed and turn the lamp off. no skincare, nothing, and he settles into bed next to you, almost spooning you, but giving you some space.

you feel his hand come up to stroke your hair.

"good night angel."

something's keeping you up.

you can't put a finger on what it is exactly.

you twist around and see ran fast asleep next to you, no doubt too exhausted to even pleade his case with you. his hand is on your pillow, having fallen asleep while stroking your hair. you had fallen asleep too, but something woke up you up around twenty minutes ago, and you can't seem to figure out what.

the temperature of the room is perfect. chill, but not cold. the blankets aren't too heavy to make you hot. you aren't hungry and you just took a few sips of water some time back when you had woken up.

so what is it?

do you miss ran? do you miss the contact of him spooning you?

no... not that you wouldn't miss it, but more like you and ran moved around in bed a lot while you sleep so you aren't always touching each other.

no, this is something more related to your body.

for a second you wonder if you're secretly pregnant.

no.

you press a hand on your stomach. you feel like you're close to the problem, because now you can zero in on something inside you being wrong, but pregnant? no. not even food poisoning, you didn't eat anything disagreeable.

something inside you...

"ran. ran!"

you shake him, and if you weren't so taken aback, you would've stopped to admire how gorgeous he is. his purple and black hair fans out on his forehead, and his chest gently rises and falls. he really could be a model, his strong angular jaw and his angelic features uniting masculinity and femininity to create such beauty.

"ran!" you smack him across his face with your pillow.

"what, what, fuck!" he shouts, rising up to his elbows, his eyes flitting over you. his hands immediately roam over you before his eyes adjust to the dark to make sure that you're in one piece and not hurt in any way.

"wha' happened," he says gruffly, sitting up this time, his hands still on your waist protectively.

you falter, seeing how protective he is of you, and how much sexier he sounds with his voice deeper from sleep.

you bite your lip. "hi."

"what the fuck happened," he blinks at you slowly, like he can't believe this situation. he's just been forced awake by his panicked little wife who had just been screaming and now you're sitting pretty, hair mussed, bra strap sliding off your shoulder, eyes wide, looking ditzy.

"um, nothing much. what's up with you?" you shrug, looking down.

"i'm going to count to three- "

he doesn't even have to finish his sentence for you to start talking. you know all too well what happens when he counts to three.

"so you know how i dressed up for you and then you so very rudely ignored me?"

"i apologized for that, and you told me to die."

"yeah, that."

he stares at you. "and?" he prompts.

"i didn't actually want you to die."

that makes him crack a little smile. "why thank you. that's one less person now. unfortunately the list's a bit too long for me to be in the clear, honey."

you scrunch up your face at that. ran's a terrible person. you forget that sometimes. his worst crime is probably torture and homicide, not kicking your plushie off the bed.

"was that all?" he asks, thumb stroking your waist. "can we sleep now?"

"no," you say firmly. and then you mumble something.

"what?"

"there's something inside me."

"what did all those creampies pay off," he laughs. "wait a minute, did they?" his face morphs into horror.

"no, jesus. this is less scary."

"just spit it out already!"

"fine! when i was waiting for you, i..." you shift. "um i stuffed myself with some... beads," you trail off, nodding, glad that the lights are off, so he can't see you clearly.

ran leans to the nightstand and flicks the lamp on, making eye contact with you. well there goes decency. he looks at you, his face a mix of disbelief and criticism. "you stuffed yourself with some beads."

you nod again, unable to look at him.

he grabs your face and forced you closer. "you stuffed yourself with the anal beads i bought you and told you that i would help you with."

"i wanted to surprise you okay?"

"and then you fell asleep with them inside you. who was that for? the icu when they surgically remove them from you? what if i couldn't come home tonight?"

"fine!" you pull yourself away from him. he had spent his entire life being both a brother and a father to rindou that when he brought up his stern voice he could be so goddamn condescending. "i'll do it myself then! i don't need your help anyways!"

you most definitely did need his help.

and that's why you find yourself laid on your tummy between ran's spread legs, him having pulled your hips towards him, ass facing him, legs locked around his back. your bra was tossed to the side, and your crotchless panties dangle from your ankle in sad defeat.

ran had sat back quietly, arms folded as he watched you try to pull the beads out. he didn't say a word, but watched you seriously, as though he were a teacher watching his student helplessly mess up an equation even further. the scrutiny sure didn't help, and only made you more tense.

you sniffle.

"and whose fault is it that you're in this position, huh?"

"yours."

you get a sharp slap on your left asscheek.

"it's my fault! i'm sorry!"

you can't see him, but you're sure he's enjoying this. ran's rather laidback and chill, but all of that is made up for with how much of a stern disciplinarian he is in situations like this.

he pulls your ass closer and your pussy settles on his crotch, feeling his thick and hard cock beneath his boxers. you snicker.

"what was that for, slut?" he asks, giving you a harsh pinch on your other cheek.

you squeal and kick your feet. "nothing. just nice to know you missed me too."

"hmm," he hums, taking you in.

you really are the stupidest little girl in the world. of course he misses you. he'd be mad not to. the light of his life. he loves his job, but he's been liking it less and less as it eats up all the time he keeps especialy for you. he's missed too many meetings and too many trips just to spend an evening watching a movie with you or a weekend away with you. and here you are, pitching a fit because apparently he doesn't miss you anymore.

as much as he chides you for your carelessness, it's landed his beautiful wife face down ass up, stuffed full in her ass with purple anal beads. all that could be seen of it was the glinting sea pearl that hung out like a charm from the base, with the backdrop of your pretty little pucker behind it.

he grabs the base and gives a little tug, causing you to yelp.

"you need to relax honey," he mutters, rubbing your back.

"well you're not helping with that," you grumble.

he rolls his eyes. he reaches for the lube and sees the half empty bottle and can't help but think about how much lube you had emptied within yourself trying to get it in in the first place, a finger pushing each bead in while the other hand poured lube on your gaping hole. his cock jumps at the image of that.

"hmm, what how can we get you to relax, huh? would a spanking work? you get pretty brainless from a good spanking, don't you honey? i was meaning to give you one in the morning just because of how you behaved with me."

you kick at the thought of that, heat filling your face, pussy pulsing at the thought. yes, unfortunately ran had trained you into taking his spankings well, but that would tense you up too much, and he knew that. he's just doing this to rile you up.

ran smirks as he watches your pussy squeeze around nothing, dampening. he's trained you well.

"but on second thought, maybe you need something more humiliating. you think i'm just wasting time hanging out with my guys at work, huh? how 'bout i handcuff you over the table with your panties pullled down, huh? so all the bad, bad men i work with can remind you of how tough this job is, huh?"

"no!" you whine, pushing your ass out. "no!"

he watches your pussy get wetter and wetter. he massages your lubed up hole with two fingers and slips two fingers inside you. you really were a sick girl. his sick girl.

"o- ohhh," you moan, as his thick, long fingers sink deeper inside you.

in and out, up and down. all while teases your asshole into opening. his finger swipe further and hurther in, scissoring before they finally curl down and hit your g spot.

"ran! ran! please, please, more!"

and that's when he slows down.

the rhythm he had built up slows down into a gentle massaging on your g spot.

"ran, what the hell? you're so- "

you falter as a another feeling takes over. an insistent pushing from in the inside of your hole.

plop!

"there we go," says ran, and you can hear the smile in his voice. " there's my big girl."

the first bead popped out, shiny and glossy, warm from your insides, lube dripping down it. your hole closes up again, and he presses down on your g spot again, causing you to let out a strangled cry.

"another one sweetheart," he coos, "relax for me?"

plop!

the second one pops out as your mind is lost from both the sensations. the bliss from having your g spot massaged combined with the odd pleasure that's coming from him playing with your hole.

plop!

"oh, there's another one," you murmur, dazed.

"my big girl can count can't she," he laughs. he sure has the fucking audacity. "last two honey."

you push your ass out and get onto your knees, chest pressed on the bed. he snickers at your eagerness and drives his fingers deeper in you, stroking away.

plop!

you feel lighter, both inside and in your head. you can't believe that for all your complaining, you're spending the night with your husband yanking anal beads out of your asshole. not even in a sexy way particularly. for the sake of not having a medical emergency.

"last one angel," he kisses you ass cheek. "can you do that for me?"

"uh huh."

"what do you say?"

"yes daddy," you keen as his fingers push deeper in you again. you feel his lips a feather light kiss on your perineum, and you can blush from how soft it feels.

he watches as the last bead slowly pushes it's way out of your hole with a final little plop!

watching your pretty hole gao almost sets something primal off in ran, and with a low growl he gets on his knee, one leg braced against the bed. he lowers his boxers and brings his heavy cock out that he had neglected for a little too long. the grinding of your pussy on his crotch wasn't nearly enough for what his eyes were feasting on.

the thick head of his tip slaps against your sloppy pussy and you whine, finally getting a taste of what you've been missing.

"give it to me ran, i've been waiting for too long."

"i know pretty, i've been gone for too long these days, haven't i?"

he pushes in, and that familiar feeling of being filled is back. you husband is back.

"daddy," you cry in ecstacy as his tip finally reaches the deepest it can go. "i love you."

"daddy's home honey," he pants, having mounted you finally, and now driving into to you. "i love you."

the pace picks up and you're boneless as ran's firm grip on your waist is all that's holding you up. he slams into you, his cock hitting all the right places as he leans down and covers all of you, holding you tight.

"i'm sorry angel, i'm sorry i haven't been home lately. but it's all for you, yeah. it's all so i can give you a beautiful life and make you a mama one day, nice and plump and spoiled."

"ohhh!" that sends a wave through you. "you wanna make me a mama?"

"yeah honey, you'll be a good mama, won't you? perfect girl?"

"yes, yes daddy," you cry, "i'm cumming, gonna come!"

"come for me angel," he pushes into you one final time, and you come together. the orgasm hits you like a tidal wave, causing you to sink under bliss as you feel him filling you up to the brim with his thick, warm cum.

he bites the crook of your neck and coos as he watches you shake underneath him.

"my wife," he whispers, pressing kisses down your neck. "my beautiful silly wife. i always miss you. i love you."

he turns you over, and you immediately twist your limbs into each others'. you smile as you look into his eyes, his hair still untouched despite it all. you reach out and mess it up, causing him to laugh and kiss your wrist.

"i love you," you mutter. "and i know you love spending time with me. i was just frustrated... and in need of a rough night with you. i don't actually want you to die."

"i know." he nods, giving you little kisses. "i'm the luckiest man alive to have a wife who loves me so much she stuffed herself full of the anal beads i told her not to use without me."

"my hole is sore," you groan as he nuzzles against your chest.

"bend over, i'll kiss it better."

reblogs, tagging, comments, likes and asks are HIGHLY APPRECIATED!!!

read my other tokyo revengers fic -

bully baji x popular reader fic

all right heathens. this one's done. pls hop on anon/asks and tell me i'm not alone in my insanity and you're this horny for this man too ❤️

[kittysarchive]

Stay still, Heeseung

warnings- smut, use of vibrater, slight exhibitionism?, needy reader, car sex, cuming inside, use protection, lmk if i missed any

Fidgeting on the couch, you couldn't stay still as your pussy literally pulsed. Hanging out with your friends and boyfriend, you had been waiting for this movie night!

What made it intense was the vibrater situated in your pussy. Pulsing through you, it was on the third highest setting, and you already felt like you were going to burst.

"The movie just started" Heeseung teased, placing his hands on top of yours, smiling at your friends as they saw this seemingly cute exchange, nodding your head you tried to hide the bucking of your hips. You didn't want to upset Heeseung and you certainly didn't want to embarrass yourself in front of your friends.

Easing down your hips, you struggled to pay attention to the movie. Something about a man in a red suit who could never die? You couldn't tell from the way your brain fuzzed. Fuck, why did he have to do this today?

Biting your lip to compress a moan, you were glad this movie was action packed, and with the speakers situated in the room. You were blessed with the loudness. Small moans were able to escape your mouth.

Heeseung toying with the remote, he bumped it up to the highest setting, causing your hips to buck up again, begging for any friction. You knew you would have to exit soon...to pleasure yourself. But you knew Heeseung, you knew you would have to wait until home.

"Stay still baby" He whispered in your ear, the hair on your arms stood up from that small constant. God, you were so needy it was pathetic.

"I can't" You whine quietly, turning your face to his. Your scrunched up face, teeth biting hard on your lips, body slightly squirming from the intense pulsing in your cunt. You couldn't hold it much longer.

"Sorry guys I just realised I have dinner with Y/N's family tonight..." Heeseung piped up through a quote spell. Your friends all groaned but let you go, nonetheless. Saying quick goodbyes, you quickly walked out of the house, nearly running.

"Slow down princess I'm right here" He laughed, catching up to you. Unlocking the car, you both climbed into the back seat.

"That was torture" You cry out, ripping out the vibrater, hoping for Heeseung's cock instead.

"Want the real thing baby?" Heeseung cooed above you, placing you easily onto his lap. You nod your head, hands ready to rip off your clothes. In the dark street, no one to see you...and the possibility to, he was needy for you as well. Unzipping his fly, he didn't bother to shed his clothes as he adjusted his cock, allowing it to spring out. Your pussy soaking, you were ready to take him.

"Please" You cry out, his hold on your hips don't allow you to move. Desperate to fuck him, desperate to ride him, desperate for the real thing, you could hardly wait any longer.

Exchanging no words, he eases you onto his cock. Your wetness easily swallows him up.

"Your so wet....so wet" He sighs out, relishing the feeling of your pussy sliding down his shaft. Feeling your cunt reach his base, you lift your body up, slamming down on his length.

"N-need you Hee" You cry out, hips slamming down back onto his. Lips finding his, they dance. Desperate for each other, your lips hold your passion. Fully clothed, this was your only other avenue of pleasure. Breaking apart form the short and heated kiss, a ling of saliva connects you.

"Don't stop" His head falls back onto the headrest. Feeling your wetness cover his cock, feeling you slam down on him, hearing your pussy squelch, hearing how needy you were for him.... He was going to burst any second.

"Want me to make a mess?" Heeseung drawls out a laugh. With the pleasure becoming to much, with him unable to hold out, of course he couldn't stop the small laugh, an escape from the pain of holding his own pleasure back.

"W-wait" You cry, hips desperate rolling, desperate bucking and desperately slamming down on his poor, needy and ready to release cock. Hearing your command, he bites his own lips, forcing his release to hold off.

"Okay now" You call out, a white haze covers your eyes as you feel his warm seed spurt up inside you.

"holy..." Heeseung doesn't finish his sentence, mouth left open as he feels himself cum inside you, your walls still clench around his soft shaft. Turning his head to the side, he admires the now foggy windows...he sure had a good time.

[cryptidghostgirl]

Can I request a part 3 to "unrequited"?

A/N I honestly was not planning another part to this story. I'm just gonna... leave this here. (Pls don't hate me guys. This is so genuinely the only path I could think of for this story that I liked.)

Unrequited pt. 3 (Alastor x Reader)

Pairing: Alastor x Reader

Warnings: Um. Alastor is dark/yandere in this part. Uh. Unhealthy relationship. Yeah.

Word Count: 2,094

Previous Parts:

Unrequited (Alastor x Reader)

Unrequited Pt. 2

Master Lists:

Master Lists 

Hazbin Hotel Master List

Alastor had cornered her in the hall. The years, the games, the challenges, none of it was fun anymore. It all came to an end tonight. There was no other option, not when she could die tomorrow. The angels were coming, and they were coming for the hotel.

"I don't want you here tomorrow."

"What!?" Y/n exclaimed in utter shock.

She hadn't known what to expect when Alastor had stopped her as she made her way downstairs to the bar. Everyone was supposed to be having a drink together, celebrating their afterlives that there was a chance they might loose. She didn't know what to expect but, she certainly hadn't expected this.

Alastor had been acting weird lately. He was always weird but ever since the day with Husk in the hallway, he'd been weird even by those standards. He was always finding something for Y/n to do that put her near him, always watching. It was irritating. They had been fighting a lot and Alastor still had yet to apologize to Husk.

"I don't want you at the hotel tomorrow. You are not coming near this fight."

"What the fuck, Alastor?" Y/n nearly stamped her foot on the floor, she crossed her arms and glared at the demon, "I... these are my friends. This is my home. I will do what I can to protect it."

"No, you wont. You wont be here." he paused, "I will use our little deal to make sure of that, if need be."

Y/n scoffed. Her anger was a fiery, radiant thing. Alastor found himself thinking she had always reminded him quite a bit of a lioness when she got like this. The thought had been an accident, he couldn't afford to be distracted. Not when these were the stakes. Alastor pushed it away.

"You fucking... literally why? Like, what? I... sorry, just taking me a bit to process this: the demon who tricked me into selling my soul to them is now going to use that contract to take me, a valuable asset, out of a war which we cannot afford to loose?"

"Yes." Alastor nodded.

"Because?" Y/n prompted in irritation after a moment.

Alastor sighed.

"Y/n, think about what could happen if you are here."

"The same thing that could happen to any one here!" Y/n threw her arms up in exasperation, gesticulating her frustration as she spoke, "The same thing you're forcing on Husk and Nifty, have you had this chat with either of them?"

Alastor didn't respond. It was all the answer she needed.

"Yeah, I didn't fucking think so!" she scoffed, "So it's okay for everyone to risk their lives -- it's okay for you to risk your life even, but not me? Its okay for you to force my friends to risk their lives, but you're going to force me to stay out of it? Listen to yourself, you sound ridiculous."

"We don't need your help. You're slow, you will only hold us back."

The comment he had hope would dampen Y/n's spirit, bend her will into submission, only added to her fire.

"I'm... that's bullshit and we both know it. I might be small, but so is Nifty. Everyone has skills they can offer. I know how to fight, how to survive, and we will have angelic weapons for Christ's sake. Like, I really don't understand what the issue your having is here."

"Y/n, just... no." Alastor shook his head, a hand to his temples, "No. You will not be here tomorrow. I forbid it. I'm sending you to stay with Rosie."

"What am I, your kid?" Y/n sneered.

Alastor looked over at her, his hand falling from his forehead.

"Just please, Y/n." he took a step forward, pulling her hands into his. Alastor took a deep breath. "For me."

Y/n's eyes went wide. Alastor could see the conflict, the swirling emotions. Anger turned to grief, mixed with gratitude, and became anger again. A never ending cycle.

His heart pounded against his chest, it fought him valiantly for release. It had been so long. So long since she'd looked at him with anything other than disgust, so long since she had let him touch her like this.

Y/n settled on confusion as her dominant emotion and pulled her hands from his grasp. Alastor mourned the contact, his hands still held up in the air where hers had met them as Y/n took a step away.

"Why."

It wasn't a question. Y/n commanded information and at the end of the day, he may own her soul but she owned his heart. Alastor felt like in some way, she always had. He couldn't bear the thought of loosing her but, he didn't know if he could handle the rejection either. There was no way, no chance, she would believe him if he told her too much of the truth but, lying wouldn't work either. It would have to be a careful balance, a calculated withholding of information. Too much was riding on tomorrow, on tonight, on this very moment.

"Because I don't want you to die."

Y/n's brow furrowed even further, their eyes growing wider still as she stumbled another step back. Her back was nearly against the wall now, there wasn't anywhere else she could go.

Her eyes flitted around the space fervently. Her lips formed words that never left her mouth. Alastor watched, stress eating him alive. At last, Y/n did something. She brought her hands to her head and sunk to the floor, her knees pulled into her chest.

"What are you doing to me." she muttered softly, just barely loud enough for him to hear.

For what felt like the thousandth time, Alastor felt a little piece of his heart fracture off. He didn't know how much more he could take of this before there was nothing left to break, nothing left to loose. She looked up at him, her hands still holding either side of her head and her eyes wet with tears.

"Why do you care?"

Alastor's breath caught in his throat. There was an insistence in her voice, a pleading. He stood in indecision for a moment, frozen by want, by need, by fear. His body took over as he took a step towards Y/n. Alastor kneeled down in front of her.

With great care, with a familiarity and gentleness Y/n hadn't felt from him in years, Alastor untangled her fingers from her hair. He held her hands in his once again and this time, he wasn't going to let go.

"Because I care about you."

Shock at his own bravery emanated from his chest. Alastor held his breath.

"You..." Y/n's eyes hardened, "I wish you'd stop messing with my head like this. Its not funny."

"Y/n, I'm not messing. I am not playing a game, I'm not..." Alastor sighed, letting go of one of Y/n's hands and running his hand through his hair as he looked to the side.

Taking a deep breath, he turned back to face her, grabbing her free hand once again.

"I don't know what I can do to prove it to you, that I'm not. But I will keep you safe. No matter what, you will not be here tomorrow."

"Please, Alastor."

His heart stopped. He couldn't recall the last time she'd asked him for anything that wasn't to leave her, Husk, and Nifty, alone. He couldn't recall the last time she'd seemed to fragile in his arms.

"Please, they're... they're my family. I can't..." a single tear rolled down Y/n's cheek, "I can't just leave them."

"I..."

There was a moment, a split second where he almost agreed. Alastor's eyes narrowed. He dropped Y/n's hands and got back to his feet. She adjusted her position in response, nearly kneeling before him.

"Please, Alastor. Let me help them. Let me do what I can to protect my family. Please. I'll do anything you want... I'll..."

It almost worked. Alastor felt his purpose waver again. Then the fear came back. He had already lost so much. His mother, his humanity, his own soul and free will. Alastor refused to add Y/n to the list of things that were so far out of his reach. He just couldn't. He didn't care if she hated him for the rest of eternity, as long as it meant she was safe at his side.

"No." he shook his head, his heart hardening, "You forget, you already have to do whatever I want. You forget, I own you."

Y/n's scream of anger as the shadows took her was muffled as she was sucked into their portal. Alastor stood, watching the spot she had been in for a few moments and then, he doubled over in pain. It shot through him in spikes, in daggers. It was the first time he had told her that. Not once before had Alastor ever said those three words to Y/n, not even when they had first made their deal. I own you.

The guilt, the regret, all of it underpinned by the overwhelming love. It had been trapped for so long, so sheltered and pushed back in the recesses of his mind that it had twisted. The love had become obsessive, dangerous, hungry.

With a breath, Alastor stood straight once again. Pushing his composure back to the surface, he smoothed his hair and went down to the bar to inform everyone of his decision. He may have forced Y/n to do something she didn't want to, fracturing things further than he'd believed possible, but he wasn't going to blame her for it. Alastor was used to being the villain and hopefully, in this case, he wouldn't have to be. Hopefully, they would understand.

Y/n gasped for breath as she was let out of the shadow portal. Panting on all fours, slowly she brought herself back together. Y/n had met Rosie before, once or twice. She knew she was a kind soul at heart, a reasonable person, and she knew that Rosie's cannibals were the main force of their army tomorrow. All she had to do was convince the overlord to let her join them, and it would be okay.

Taking a deep breath to restore her confidence, Y/n looked up. Her heart dropped.

"No."

She got to her feet, looking carefully around the decrepit old radio tower.

"No. Nonono."

Her breaths becoming panicked, she ran to the door. It was locked. Taking a step back, she kicked it harshly. The firm wood didn't budge.

Driven by adrenaline alone, Y/n ran to the windows and began to hit them with all her might. None of them so much as trembled.

"No!"

She looked wildly around the space and, spotting Alastor's chair, picked it up. Y/n hurled it at the window. There was a crash and for a split second, there was hope. That was until she realized it was the chair that had broken, not the window.

"No! No!"

Turning back to the door, she hurled her body repeatedly against it. Each time, she got the biggest running start she could. Each time, there was no change at all, nothing happened. Fresh tears pooled in her eyes, she was long past panicked now.

"NO!"

After about twenty minutes, Y/n was out of breath and exhausted. Her whole body hurt and her face was sticky with tears. She sat at the door, her back pressed against it and her knees pulled into her chest. Burying her face in her legs, she sobbed.

Everyone was at the hotel, except for her. Everyone was preparing to fight for and protect what they loved, except for her. What would they think? What would they say? Much more importantly, would they make it out?

A sudden fear gripped her, a fist around her heart. Would she ever see any of them again? Y/n's sobs redoubled.

"Fucking..."

She sniffed, her panic and grief quickly fixing itself back in the shape of the familiar anger. She could see him in her minds eye, that moment his eyes had softened, that moment she thought that maybe he had been telling the truth all along, that they really had been friends, that he really did care.

"I hate you Alastor!" she screamed to herself, alone in the dark, "I hate you and I will continue to hate you until the day I fucking die again!"

----

A/N I love an irredeemable villain and doomed, misshapen love. I'm sorry to anyone who wanted this to end up happy.

[forgeofthenine]

I need to know how the bachelors would react to their partner slipping up and calling them “Daddy”. Pls 🙏

I've been looking forwards to doing this request for a while now, there's something exciting about exploring a classic daddy kink with our favourite men. I hope you don't mind Anon, I added in a surprise Halsin too!

TW: NSFW under the cut, mentions of overstimulation, mentions of sort of exhibitionism (in Halsins)

Calling the bachelors (+Halsin) daddy NSFW headcanons

Dammon

It's a normal night with Dammon when it happens

Despite him having your knees up by your ears, neither of you decided to get very kinky tonight

That is, until he thrusts into you just right and you can't help the noise that comes out

Even if you might be embarrassed by the quiet moan of 'daddy' that escaped you, Dammon certainly isn't

It doesn't phase him, his pace keeping steady as he folds you over and fills you with his cock

It's easy to wonder if he even heard what you'd just said

He quite happily proves that he is listening with his own groan that leaves him next

"Fuck baby, you're taking daddy's cock so well... just like that."

Dammon is more than happy to indulge your daddy kink now he knows about it

Absolute filth leaves his mouth as he praises you for taking 'daddy' so sweetly

The night ends with him asking you to cum for daddy, his voice low and husky as he tries not to cum before you

There's no need to be shy about it now, Dammon himself is hooked just as much as you are

Also the bachelor most likely to refer to himself as daddy outside of the bedroom

Zevlor

Do you want this man to die from being too horny?

You're laid out over his bed, the tiefling between your legs as he goes down on you

It's easy to buck up and into his awaiting mouth, your hands wrapped tight around his horns, a low moan of 'daddy' leaving you

He definitely pauses for a moment when he first hears it, his breath hot against your skin before he dives back in

The mouth working over you seems more excited, frenzied almost, Zevlors own excitement apparent through how he pleasures you

It's only when you're just on the edge, the paladin pulling back and letting his hand do the work in getting you off, a simple command leaving him

"Be good and cum for daddy."

It's impossible not to do as he asks, stars dancing behind your eyes as your lover kisses and nips the bare skin of your thighs

You'll soon find it's not the first time Zevlors been called daddy in bed, but he'd certainly be disappointed if it was the last

Please just ride this man's dick while calling him daddy, he'll get addicted

Rolan

Rolan has you laid across his lap as swift strikes land on your bare ass, a pause for you to count each time it happens

He's more than happy to tell you to stop wiggling, to take your punishment and sit still

What surprises you both is when a loud moan of 'daddy' leaves you instead of the number eight

You'll feel Rolans hand resting against your ass for a moment as you both realise what happened

Soon though, the wizard will break the silence that's settled over you both

"Don't disappoint daddy now, darling, you still have to count."

Rolan absolutely makes the most of this new discovery, teasing you endlessly in the bedroom with your daddy kink

He'll even alter his pet names for you, preferring to call you variations of 'baby' or 'darling' as he bends you over his desk and fucks you

If you aren't teary eyed and babbling out daddy with overstimulation, then Rolan doesn't feel like he's done a good enough job

It doesn't even matter if Rolan is younger than you, he's still incredibly into it when you can't help but call him daddy

Halsin

It's so easy to get wrapped up in Halsin, literally and figuratively

When he has you sat on his lap, god-like cock stretching you beyond belief, strong arms wrapped around you... Well it's easy to get lost in him

It's no surprise then when you let out a high pitched moan, calling the elf daddy as he helps you ride him

Halsins another one that won't be phased, instead easily falling into his role as your daddy

Large, calloused hands wrap around your hips to help as he lets out his own rumbling groan in response

"Just like that, little one. Let out all your noises for daddy to hear."

He's endlessly encouraging of any noises you make, especially when they're part of a kink he didn't realise you have

As patient as the man is, he doesn't last long hearing you call him that before he's flipping you over

The way he fucks you is primal and comforting at the same time, and like any good daddy he makes sure you cum until you're near begging for a break

There's no better daddy out there than Halsin, both in and out of the bedroom, and he has no shame if your companions end up hearing his new nickname

[robin374]

OMG HELLO, I'm not good with English so I'm sorry if it looks bad :((. I come to ask and request mercs for tf2 (or just snipers, scouts and medics) with an s/o who when they sleep together doesn't let them off, they are literally hugging each other from them and for nothing in the world does he want to let them go when they want to get up, thank uu byebye

"Don't go please"

A/N: I'm back from the death. Don't worry pookie I've got you.

Characters: Scout, Sniper, Medic

Info: Gender Neutral Reader. Romantic.

Scout:

I was going to say that he's exaclty the same. However, we all know that this man canno be still while sleeping. He doesn't do it on purpose of course, he is just naturally energetic, so he does in unconsciuly.

He goes to sleep with you between his arms and always thinks to himself: "I won't kick them out of the bed tonight." Only to wake up with you, still asleep, grasping his ankle for dear life at the edge of the bed.

If he wakes up before you, he embraces you and he waits for you to open your eyes to tell you that he held you all the night. Of course, you two have a job to do, and a Soldier out of your room's door screaming for you to 'get your asses up'. Surprisingly, he's the one to get up first, after trying to free himself from your hold.

"Alright, toots, it's time to get up..." he says as he leaves sofy little kisses all over your face.

Sniper:

It may not seem like it, but the moment he feel sconfident and comfortable with you and the relationship, he's exactly the same. i know that I always say it, but I will die on this hill: He's your wet cat man!!

He doesn't move while sleeping, he's usually very calm. There are times that you think he's dead because you can't hear his breathing. However the slight squeeze you receive when you move tells you that he's alive (thank god).

You two always arrive to breakfast late, because those '5 more minutes' become in 10, then 20, 30... Soldier has given up already.

He likes to feel your warmth and smell your unique scent. His tensed up muscles relax whenever he feels you near him, and more if you touch are touching him, even if you two are just locking pinkies togheter.

Whenever you don't let him get up from the bed, he just accepts his defeat and lets you wrap yourself around him. You remind him of a koala to be honest.

Medic:

Everyone thinks that he doesn't sleep...Honestly, I just think that he's the type of person that tells you to go to sleep early but he goes to bed at like 4 am or around that hour. Like he always tells you: "Y/N, you must go to bed early! Your body needs a minimum of 8 hours of sleep. Now go to bed, I will be with you sooner than you think."

Liar.

Even knowing that you are fast asleep and very comfortable in your shared bed he always wakes you up, telling you something really weird about his new experiment. "Do you want to see Scout's liver with legs?" He will ask you with a eager smile. Of course, he will drag you to his laboratory.

Everytime you hold his hand while you rub your eyes with the other. he's so happy to show you new things that he doesn't realize until later that you had been waiting for him. As an apology, he lets you hug him while you sleep. Then in the morning when Soldier knocks on your door he 'politely' tells him to shut up, and manipulates him into thinking that you need to have 8 hours of sleep to be fully focused on that day's battle. So he believes it and lets you sleep.

He's your silly mad scientist.

[filthgarbage86]

Take me to Church

Note: this definitely has absolutely nothing to do with the church, but when Eddie feels you for the first time, he's convinced he's found a new religion: you.

You're over at Eddie's for a movie night and dinner like every other week. Normally, you both agree to just wear your pajamas for ultimate comfort. But tonight, you were a little bit more comfortable than normal...

Content warning: smut. filth. innocent, painfully innocent reader. lots and lots of consent, lots of reassurance. Praise kink/degration kink. Body Worship. reader!has a vagina, Eddie x reader, ass grabbing, fingering, p in v, kitchen sex, teasing. Let me know if I missed anything!

you had to know

Eddie is sitting on the edge of his seat, in the kitchen, as you're reaching for something in the cupboard.

Except you're in your night-time wear. Which is always a big shirt and underwear. But you usually put shorts on or pants on in front of Eddie, you guys had only just recently gotten together. You were still getting comfortable with him.

You seem to be plenty comfortable, because as you're not wearing your shorts or pants. You're wearing cheeky, little, boyshort undies that have Eddie realizing he's never really seen your ass. And he feels like he's transcended.

Surely you know that you're showing your whole ass right now.

But you continued to reach on your tiptoes to get something, a snack from the top shelf, but you still had to reach with every inch you could.

"Should I say something?" he thought to himself, immediately followed by the smallest, tiniest, moment of selfish-intent of he didn't want to say something. He wanted to enjoy just looking at you, completely unaware.

"Am I allowed to look? Is this okay? We are together, it's not illegal i guess, but what if-" his spiral came to stop as soon as you came back down, flattening your feet.

You mindlessly pull down your shirt, just like you normally do, oblivious. Until you turned around. And you're greeted with Eddie turning his head so quickly down to the table, trying to cover the bright flush of his cheeks, hoping he didn't get caught. He definitely got caught.

What's up with him? What could have... You immediately go to cover your ass, literally, and are bug eyed. He was totally looking. You giggle a little to yourself. Eddie was staring at your ass and you totally caught him.

"What's so funny?"

"I don't know, what's got you so flustered, huh? See something?"

It was his turn to go bug-eyed. "I didn't mean to- not that I didn't want to, I mean I did, but I didn't want you to get uncomfortable- but I thought for sure you had to have known- but i didn't want to- I was"

You're giggling once again, you've finally got big, scary, mysterious, metalhead dork babbling on, all because he got caught looking at your ass. You walk over very swiftly but gently and hold onto his face, his cheeks immediately warming yours. His face settles into your hold, you loved when he did this.

"Eddie, it's okay, I'm not mad."

"You're not?"

"No, of course not, I'm just a little embarrassed"

"Angel, why are you embarrassed?"

It's your turn to blush, "cause.. you know.. i didn't really realize you were paying attention and that my ass was just out. it's a bit embarrassing of me."

He immediately puts his hands on the curve where your hips and waist meet "Honey, I promise you, it was not embarrassing in the slightest. I felt very guilty at how lucky I felt..."

"Guilty? Lucky? What are you-"

"Can I touch it?"

"What?"

"Y/N, can I touch your ass?"

well shit you are officially more flustered than he was before all of this. Shit. What was even happening? You couldn't do much more than nod your head slowly and softly. He was going to die, how could someone be so fucking hot and so fucking cute at the same time?

"Are you sure? I want you to be fully comfortable. You can tell me how you feel if you don't want me to okay?"

"I know. It's okay. You can do it."

"Can do...?" Okay now he's just being mean.

you are trying to look everywhere else, but it's hard when he's still sitting at the kitchen chair and looking up at you like you hang the stars individually. You take a deep breathe, close your eyes, and at that he squeezes your hips a little. God damn it, you thought you were in control in this situation. "you can... touch me, Eddie"

"Thank you" and with that he slides his hands down your hips with a slight squeeze, then your thighs, first the front a few times, to the sides, wrapping his arms and hands around your thighs starting from the backs of your knees and slides up to grab your ass. Finally.

Both of you groan at this gesture. Your body felt like it was on fire just from his touch, you're already doomed. It felt so good to touch you, you were so soft and were so perfect to him. He couldn't stop groping and kneading and gripping onto your ass as though he was trying to burn the feeling into his head. He practically was.

You breathe out a quiet "Eddie" and he groans again

"Yes Angel?" "Nothing it just.. feels.. good. Thank you" "oh you sweet, beautiful angel, no need to thank me, you are worthy of worship." "Cheeseball." "I'm so serious. you look like those paintings we had to study in history."

You were so fuzzy brained just from his touch, you wanted him to keep touching you. You wanted more. You needed more. It was almost like he heard your thought. He takes one of his hands regrettably off you, but just long enough to where your whine in protest turned into another breathy moan. He grabbed the back of your neck and kissed you feverishly, gripping onto your ass with his other hand hard. You wondered if there would be marks left over, you hoped there would be.

You couldn't stand even the slight distance, you give up caring and straddle him on the kitchen chair. Before wrapping your arms around his neck to keep him close to you, not wanting to take your lips off his for even a second, you moved his hand back onto your ass. He groans, deepening the kiss and holding and groping and feeling you.

He moves then to kissing your jawline, down your neck, and up to your sensitive spot near your ear where you could feel and hear every breathe, every whine, every moan this man let out and you were lost. You were completely lost in the moment, your whole body on fire, a heat you've never felt before. You needed him, desperately.

"Eddie, I want.." "Hmm? What was that baby? What do you want?" "Mmmhmm eddieeee" He loosens his grip slightly, having you whine again in protest, "What do you want princess? What do you need?" "I want you to touch me." He chuckles to himself "I am touching you honey" "I mean.. everywhere" "What was that?" Bastard even leaned into you so you could repeat your whisper

"Damn it, Eddie, I don't know. I just want you to touch me everywhere, touch me like you want me."

His face was so still for a second, before his eyes flash with vigor, something sinister behind them, coupled with a wicked smile that went ear to ear. "I can touch you baby?"

"Please."

You would have thought you just told him he won the lottery and are performing in Vegas. He crashes his mouth back onto yours and holds your hips down as he grinds up into you, causing you to gasp at the friction. He used that moment to deepen the kiss, engulfing you in the understanding that he wasn't just touching you how he wanted, but how he needed.

His hands were everywhere. On your hips, thighs, your chest, your ass still, wrapped around you, he couldn't stop until he memorized every single inch of you. He has you writhing under his touch. You were delirious, grinding down onto him as he worked you up. Both of you were just a pair of huffing, panting, moaning messes.

"Do you... want to.. move to.. my room..." Eddie said in between kisses, which he took turns where he was kissing.

"No I need you now. Right now. Please."

"In the kitchen? that's filthy, baby"

"Doesn't matter, I want it, I need you. Please."

"Don't gotta tell me twice"

He lifts your shirt off first, practically drooling at your exposed chest and you had to fight every intention of hiding them. He quickly disguarded his own shirt and then latched his mouth onto one of your nipples and teased the other with his fingers.

"fuck.. shit... god yes. thank you."

"Fuck you're so polite baby, how'd I get so lucky to have such a well mannered filthy little slut?" you whimper at his words, near tears from pleasure. This was going very fast but you were so caught up in it, you didn't dare stop it.

Eddie took one of his hands and slithered down and down and down until he reached your cute, sinful little booty shorts and spread your ass just slightly to rile you up again. This man was going to be the absolute death of you.

He slowly drags then his hand down until he's literally holding your clothed pussy in his hand and you have to really control yourself not to immediate grind down into his touch. That didn't last long though, as he presses two fingers gentle upwards to add pressure directly to your clit. Your eyes roll back a bit, you're so sensitive right now and you just want to put your head down into his neck but you didn't want to give up just yet.

You finally do grind down onto him and he grabs you by your ass with both hands, stands you up, pulls your underwear down while staring you. You couldn't not look at him but that didn't stop you from going completely fuzzy brained. You felt like you were short circuiting.

"You still with me, Angel? You're awfully quiet" "I just don't want to ruin it." "Sweetie, you couldn't ruin this. You are... everything. Like you are so unbelievably stunning, I don't know what to do with myself, but I have many ideas of what I want to do to you. If you still want."

"Yes please."

"Can I finger you, please?" How could you say no to him when he asked so nicely.

You settle back down onto his lap and his kisses turn more gentle. He kisses you on your shoulders, your collarbone, your neck, everywhere he could get to. Down the valley of your chest, even kisses you on both sides with such lightness it makes you dizzy and drunk from affection. You were in heaven.

As he's doing this, his hand slides back and behind you, slipping his fingers in between your pussy. You are soaked. Wet, sticky, sweetly soaked and he decides right there that he himself is ruined forever. He's never felt such a plump, soft, wet, beautiful pussy as yours. He rubs a few circles around your clit to test the waters a bit and are welcomed with breathy moans once again.

"Yes please" you whisper moan to him, your head really meeting his shoulder. He takes this as encouragement to keep going. He takes one finger and inserts it slowly, until he is knuckle deep. His finger starts pumping into at a pain-aching slow speed - "Eddie.. more please. Please a little faster"

He immediately responds and is welcomed with even more sounds. you are giving him so many hums and moans and whines as he changes up his speed, inserting one then two more fingers into you. He's still kissing you all the while and you couldn't care anymore what you look or sound like. It didn't matter, you were a goddess to him.

"That feel good, baby? You like that?" "Feels sooo goooood eddieeee, thank youuu"

"Anything for you, angel. Fuck, you're doing so so so well."

"Can you fuck me, please? I'm ready. I want you to fuck me."

He slips his fingers out of you, leaving you empty long enough to pull down his boxers down enough to spring his dick loose, slapping against his stomach. It was big. It was long. Oh fuck, why are you both scared but so excited at the same time?

You resaddle him, literally feeling like you're saddling up, take hold of his dick and rub the head against your slick. Both of you groan at the sensation, Eddie more so once your hand fondled his cock a bit to distribute your slick onto his dick as lube and he was going to lose his mind. Finally, you line up, and start inching your way down down down until you're flushed against Eddie's lap.

Both of you just sit there for a minute, Eddie trying not to blow his load just from how warm you are and how well you squeeze his cock around your walls. You've never felt this full before, you've heard of the stretch before but you felt like you felt Eddie in your stomach and it felt good. You started rocking a bit and you start seeing stars.

It isn't long until Eddie is humping into you to meet how you bounce and grind down into Eddie, both of you wondering how this could feel so damn good.

"Fuck, you feel amazing." "You too, shit, you're so big" "You're so warm, you're perfect, I'm going to fuck this pussy any chance I get, fuck."

"Yes please, Yes please, Yes please"

You both start going faster, faster, faster until you were losing your rhythm and was obviously trying to hold out. "Babe I'm not going to last long if you keep riding me like an animal" "Me neither, I'm fuck so so so close, please please please"

Your pleads turn into a loss of breathe when your climax tips over you and crushes into you. You're seeing white light and stars until you feel nothing but warmth. Eddie's pumping into you one, two, three more times and then he releases himself. Thank gods you were on birth control. You two just sit there in bliss, ecstasy washed over both of you.

You slump down into his chest and he wraps his arms around you, hugging you into him. You both sit there holding each other as you're catching your breath.

Well, your first time together certainly was eventful.

"So wait.. should I wear shorts around you again or no?"

"If You deprive me of that simple joy and rightful access, I'll protest until the day you understand your ass is my new religion."

That has you laughing hard again, in the midst of your bodies sticking together. "But seriously, you do whatever you're most comfortable. But I wouldn't ever protest to be able to pay worship."

You smack him in the shoulder at that, but you were blushing none the less. You didn't know what you were going to do or how to thank him for looking at you that way. He still felt like he should be thanking you. The feelings were mutual.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Author's Notes: oh heyyy so like literally all my other pieces, I have uh no fuckin clue where this came from but I definitely needed to share the thought with y'all. Hope you enjoy and if not, please just scroll! Let me know know if you liked it!

[that-weeb-in-ur-closet]

Oooh please relationship headcanons (nsfw & sfw) for gojo, chuuya and fyodor (or whichever one they choose)... including what they would be like as a partner and what they would go for in a partner?

Oooh!! Nonnie, I'd love to. I don't write for Fyodor YET, but I do write for Chuuya and Gojo.

I'll do Chuuya today and Gojo tomorrow ☆☆☆

Chuuya Nakahara:

Sfw headcanons.

♡ He is the sweetest thing, and nobody can change my mind about that. He's the type to just stare at you, and when you ask him about it, he's just like, "I can't help it. You're just too pretty."

♡ He loves it when you wear his clothes, even better if you're (somehow) shorter than him. Sometimes, he'll take off his hat and put it on you, kissing your cheek as he looks at you. He's a hopeless romantic.

♡ I can see him being like, "I don't have a type." before he got a girlfriend, now that he has one, if anybody asks—he's just like, "My type is my girlfriend."

♡ The second you and him made it official, he RAN to his phone and called Dazai. "GUESS WHAT YOU SON OF A BITCH, I GOT A GIRLFRIEND!" "Good job, Chuuya. It only took you twenty years." He got mad and hung up.

♡ He's so scared of losing you, so he just never let's you go. Hugging you from behind, holding your hand, hand on your thigh while driving, any sort of physical contact makes him feel comforted.

♡ He's so protective over you. He LOVES YOU SO MUCH, and he just doesn't ever wanna lose you. If you're in the PM with him, he'll try not to let you fight much and just shield you and did that even before you got into a relationship. You found it kinda weird how he would go out of his way to protect you and nobody else, and when you brought it up, he just mumbled "shut up" and walked away like a gremlin.

♡ He loves it when you play with his hair. He has never felt such a soft touch, and it makes him feel so fuzzy and warm when you softly run your fingers through it. It's long and pretty, and you both love it. When you're making out with him and gently grip the back of his hair? That leads to something more.

♡ He gets really confused if you try internet couple trends on him. "W-what are you saying?? I'm a grown man, I'm not a baby girl!!"

♡ You gets mad really easily, but with you, it's not anger. It's just flusteredness and cute blushies. He literally can't get mad at you, no matter what, he just loves you.

NSFW HEADCANONS

☆ He's a dom. Sometimes he's rough, sometimes he's gentle. If you tease him too much, he'll be a bitch and tease you until you're begging. "Awe, what's wrong, doll? Can't take it? Then behave like a good girl."

☆ His voice??? HELLO??? Why does nobody talk about it??? His dub voice is just-... Hearing his accent makes you wet. And he takes full advantage of it. He'll lean real close to you and lick your ear, smirking into your skin, "Baaaabbbbyyyy... You look so pretty tonight... Do you even know what you do to me? Let me show you."

♡ About the hand on your thigh while driving? Yeah, that's how car sex happens. It's just the way he looks driving one-handed, the feeling of a gloved hand on your thigh, how he only "Hms" in his groggy voice to everything you say.

♡ His biggest kinks are probably dry humping. He loves it when you sit on his lap happily while watching a movie, especially if it's a romantic movie. A sex scene suddenly pops up? He'll grab your hips and slowly grind you against his boner, moaning and whining into your ear softly. (Maybe a mommy kink too but I don't wanna talk about it)

♡ If you're BOTH a part of the Mafia, like I said— he'll be protective. But sometimes, when he sees you fighting another man? He'll get jealous. So, what does he do? He fuckd you in front of them. He's gonna kill the man anyway, he's just gonna die with cum on his face.

♡ His hands. There shouldn't be any other words, but I'm saying more anyway. They're long and skinny, and they can curl inside of you so EASILY. He's skilled with them. He'll delicately flick your soft nipple and make it hard on a sweet day, or roughly grab and pinch them on a bad day. He loves when you suck on them, sometimes not even sexually, you'll just be sitting or walking and he'll put his finger in your mouth.

♡ He's the definition of Short King Anthem. I'm not gonna say anything else.

♡ He does this thing where he'll grind his hips in circles, and when I tell you, you've never felt more pleasure in one night. Ever. He KNOWS how good it feels, well, at least judging by the way you scream for him.

♡ You've made him cry during sex. A lot. And it's only because he adores feeling you, hearing your breath, hearing you moan for him and only him. He never thought he'd feel so loved, and he wants more of it. The crying only got into an emotional breakdown ONCE, and it was the first time you had sex. You didn't mind, which made him cry more.

♡ He's a big softie at heart and just wants to be touched. Aftercare with him is godly. He makes sure he didn't hurt you, makes sure you're okay and everything. He'll pick you up and take you to the bathroom to get cleaned up and does all the work. After that, he cuddles with you all night, pressed as close as physically possible to you.

He's a lover boy, change my mind.

[thursdaygxrls]

thin ice — one

part one | part two | part three

summary — she didn’t handle the sports section of the campus newspaper, but apparently, she did this week. interviewing hockey players was easy, though—unless one of those players happened to be peter parker.

pairing — uni hockey player!peter parker x fem!journalist!reader

disclaimers — i don’t own peter parker. and pls don't come for me with the accuracy of this situation i'm begging

warnings — reader is referred to as ‘kitty’ (there’s a reason, i promise), slight one sided enemies to lovers, sewer slide jokes (very briefly), possible maybe slightly ooc, and very unedited

“You’re joking. You’re pulling the biggest prank I’ve ever seen, you are the impractical joker,” she huffs out, her eyes wide as furiously clicks her mouse, “I’m gonna die. I’m writing the note tonight—farewell, my lovely!”

“Woah, okay,” MJ, her roommate, had only just entered the room when she was bombarded with a sudden rant. She didn’t even have time to take down her ponytail of thin, red braids before her eardrums were assaulted.

“I mean it.” Spinning her chair, she meets MJ’s eyes.

“I literally just got here,” MJ plops down on the bed in front of the desk, “Care to tell me why you’re writing that note?”

“I’m a dumb, dumb girl, that’s why,” she groans in response.

“We already knew that.” MJ’s words only cause the girl in front of her to shoot daggers with her gaze; “Sorry, sorry. Why are you a dumb, dumb girl?”

“God, okay, so,” she lets out a loud sigh, “Eli is gonna be gone for the rest of the month—Europe or something, good for him. Anyways, they needed someone to cover his assignments for him until he gets back, and I volunteered, but, like, only to be nice, y’know? I did it as an obligation. But…”

“But?” MJ pressed.

“I just got an email, and it’s me,” she grumbled, “They’re putting me on Eli’s assignments.”

“Hm, I see,” MJ’s lips curl into a frown as she gently rubs the girl’s arm, “Too much work?”

“Oh, no, my stuff’s easy,” she waved her off, “Just reading the poetry submissions. I mean, it can be exhausting, but it’s not too bad.”

“Then what is it?” MJ cocks her head.

“Eli…Eli does sports,” she shuddered. MJ couldn’t contain the loud laugh that slipped out, clamping a hand over her mouth to stifle it.

“You’re worried about sports?” She giggles, her eyes twinkling.

“It’s not funny!” She smacks MJ lightly, “Sports aren’t unbearable or anything, but, like, why me? I don’t know enough! I’ll screw it up, I’ll lose my spot, they’ll stick me back in—”

“Relax,” MJ grabs her shoulders, bringing her closer, “First off, no, you won’t lose your spot, we both know they’d be losing their minds without you. Second, they wouldn’t just throw it on you if they thought you’d give them bad work, right?” She eyes MJ almost suspiciously. There’s a momentary stare-down before she relents.

“I hate that you’re right,” she sighs, spinning her chair around. MJ stops the spin by putting her hands down on the arms of the chair.

“Thought you’d be used to it by now,” she giggles, “So, what do you have to do?”

“I don’t know.” Is the mumbled reply.

“You didn’t even look?” MJ laughs again, “You were losing your mind, and you didn’t even know what you’re doing?”

“I’m sorry that I’m sensitive,” she huffs. Her gaze moves back to the laptop before her. The email is open on the screen, so she begins scrolling through it, MJ reading the words over her shoulder. Her eyes nearly bulge out of her head when she gets to the end.

“Fuck this,” she almost slams her laptop shut, but is stopped short by MJ.

“Slow down!” The redhead slaps her hand out of the way to read the rest of the email.

The ESU hockey team had made it to the NCAA Division I Men's Ice Hockey tournament for the first time in six years—and they were doing damn good. Eli had been tasked with interviewing the team captain as well as a few other star players, but, of course, it was no longer Eli's job.

"Oh, come on,” MJ rolled her eyes, “They gave you a Google Doc with questions, all you have to do is ask them and write down their response."

“That's the problem, I have to ask,” she shivered.

"You've done interviews before!" MJ was ready to smack her.

"With professors! And cool artsy people! Not hockey guys," she cringed, “I bet half of them are in a frat. They're probably gonna be assholes and tell me I have cooties."

“Are you twelve?” MJ groaned, “You sort of lucked out with this—half the work is already done for you! You don’t need to write up any questions!” A sigh left her lips as she took on a more comforting tone: “If it makes you feel any better, Harry is on the team.”

Ah, Harry. MJ had been seeing him for a little over a month by now. He wasn’t a bad guy at all. A little full of himself, but nice enough to talk to. Her eyes roved over the list of players she was set to interview. Sure enough, Harry Osborn was there. So was Miles Morales, who was described as an extremely promising freshman. Zack Coleson, who had the highest number of goals for the season. Last on the list was the team captain: Peter Parker.

“I can talk to Harry,” MJ offered, “I can let him know that it’s you doing the interviews. I’ll make sure he tells them to go easy on you—”

“No, no,” she shook her head, “That might make it worse. And they already know that it’s not Eli coming. Or they should, at least”

“You sure?” MJ quirked a brow, her features crinkling in a way that was only intelligible as concern.

“They’ll be walking on eggshells around me if they know I’m chickenshit, I won’t get a good interview,” she sighed. Even if the interview wasn’t what she wanted to do, she was going to have to. And she would do a good job—a great job.

“You got this, Kitty,” MJ squeezed her shoulders. The nickname pulled a smile from her, and she gave into MJ’s touch.

“We’ll see about that,” she relented. Her eyes traveled back to the computer screen. The interviews were scheduled two days from now at the Stark Memorial Rink.

“Hey, MJ,” she hummed, “Could you grab me my noose?”

The rink was colder than she expected. The empty stands provided no body heat, not to mention there was a literal sheet of ice on the floor. Tugging at the strap of her messenger bag, she took slow, careful steps to the plexiglass.

Clink.

Her eyes widened. There were around ten to fifteen guys in full gear out on the ice, and another ten to fifteen more on a bench near the glass or flitting around the edge of the rink. She was nervous, so she got there early. Now, she was stuck watching them practice.

Leaving was so tempting. She could go back to her dorm, or better yet, leave college entirely. She could just give up and fall off the grid, cut her credit cards, throw her phone in the ocean, sail off to Greece—

“Hello?”

She cursed the muffled voice that pulled her back into reality. Blinking, she found that standing before her was one of the very hockey players she’d seen skating on the rink before her. He was tall, and gear under his black and purple jersey made him appear far more bulkier than she theorized he was. He slipped his helmet off to reveal brown, curly hair that was drenched in sweat.

“Hi,” she replied, trying not to sound as nervous as he would. He cocked his head at her as he popped out his mouth guard.

“This is a closed practice,” he said, though, he didn’t sound all too upset that she was here.

“Oh, yeah, I know,” she nodded quickly, her fingers toying with the strap of her bag again, “I’m a bit early, I’m supposed to be interviewing some people on the team. I’m—”

“Kitty?” She was interrupted by the sound of a voice as well as skates scraping across the ice. Glancing past the guy in front of her, she saw Harry slide off the ice and clomp to benches where they currently were.

“Hey, Harry.” Her lips were screwed up in a tight grin. He’d heard MJ call her Kitty once, and now it was the only thing he’d refer to her as.

“Kitty?” Mystery guy repeated the name with a hint of intrigue.

“It’s not my real name, my friends just call me that,” she shook her head.

“What’re you doing here?” Harry asked, swinging an arm around the shoulder of the guy in front of her.

“I’m Eli’s replacement,” she explained, trying to plaster a friendly smile to her lips, “I’m doing the interviews.”

“Aw, shit, why didn’t MJ tell me we got the cool Kitty-cat on the case?” Harry grinned.

“Could you try to never say those words again? Really hated it, thanks,” her nose crinkled.

“You got it.” He tried to point finger guns at her, but with the thick gloves on, it just looked like he was pointing his whole hand.

“Hey,” he started up again, “You’re a little early, so practice isn’t over yet, but we’re almost done. It’s just the four of us, right?”

“Right,” she nodded in response. It was a relief that they’d been briefed on the situation.

“Alright, well, I’m Harry, obviously, Miles and Zack are on the ice somewhere, and this right here—” Harry jostled the shoulders of the Mystery guy, “—is Peter. Oh captain, my captain!”

Peter chuckled as Harry clapped him on the back. The noise that emanated from the friendly hit was harsh, but Peter didn’t move a muscle.

“Right,” she nodded, “So, I figured we could do them individually? There’s some sort of specific questions for each of you.”

“Sounds good, Kitty,” Harry replied. She’d smack him if he said that name again.

“Sit tight for a bit,” Peter spoke up. Even with the stubble on his chin, his smile gave him a boyish appearance. He looked her up and down quickly, “We can try to wrap up practice early.”

'A bit' ended up feeling like forever. At first, she tried to distract herself with her phone, but it didn't work: she would open apps, scroll through them, then close them just to reopen them over and over again. So she organized her bag, which took about five minutes. Time seemed to tic by in a tauntingly slow manner. It was only when she saw a few of the players emerge from the locker room did she let out a breath of relief. She immediately sucked that breath back when she realized that she would actually have to talk to some of them.

Harry went first. It was easy enough to go through the questions with him. It was like talking to an over-eager relative at a family reunion, one who was just dying to talk about all the new things they're doing. Miles wasn't all that bad to interview, either. He was a lot more nervous than she was. His awkward pauses and constant strings of 'um' and 'uh' was almost comforting. Then came Peter.

"Kitty," he grinned as soon as he saw her seated on the bench next to the rink. He no longer wore his gear—just a hoodie and a pair of gray sweats. His hair, however, was still wet and tousled. She gave him a tight lipped smile in return.

"That's not my name," she replied. Before she had time to properly introduce herself, his raspy chuckle was already echoing through the open arena.

"You said that's what your friends call you, right?" He cocked his head as he sat down on the other edge of the bench.

"You're not—” If she could just make it through the interview without fuss, she'd be one person away from being free, "—right. That's what my friends call me."

"I'm going to be recording this, just so I can reference it later," she explained almost monotonously.

"This isn't my first time," he responded with another light laugh. She had to physically bite her tongue to fight off any comments. A soft click sounded from her phone as she started a new voice memo. Her eyes scanned the list of questions on the page before her. Some she'd already asked to Harry and Miles: How does it feel to make the tournament? What is the atmosphere of the team right now? She chose a fresh question to start with.

"What's it like to be the captain of this team? Are you proud? Overwhelmed?" She asked, her voice taking on a new tone closer to a news anchor than a regular person. Peter's lips curled up at the change.

"I'm proud, yeah," he nodded, his voice smooth, "This is a great group. But we all work our asses off, so I'm not surprised by how far we've come. Being their captain is really something."

"And—"

"Do you normally do sports? For the paper, I mean." Before she could even get her next sentence out, he interrupted her. Her grip on the papers in her hand tightened.

"No, not normally," she grit out, "And going along with your thoughts on being captain, what about making it to the tournament this year?"

"It's the best feeling in the world. It's something I've been chasing after for years now, finally getting to it is just...sort of indescribable." Even when his tone is nothing but sincere, he can't wipe the cocky grin from his lips.

"I can imagine," she smiled tautly in reply, "What was it like working your way up to captain? Was it a personal journey, or did you get support from the team?"

"I'd say it was an even mix of both," he hummed, "Do you like hockey?"

"What?" She furrowed her brows.

"Are you a hockey fan?" He reiterated, "Because our next game is home, and it's sort of packed, but I could get you some tickets assuming you don't have some already—"

"No—Peter," she let out a frustrated huff, tapping on her phone to momentarily pause the recording, "This is an interview, not social hour."

"Aren't interviews inherently social?" His smirk was infuriating.

"I mean that I ask the questions, you answer them," she grumbled, "Do you act like this with Eli? Are you not taking me serious because I'm a woman?"

"What?" His smirk fell immediately, "What? No—no. I'm taking you seriously, I take women very seriously. I'm all for women. They're great."

"Then can we just do this interview and get it over with?" She sighed, her finger hovering over the unpause button. He nodded, but before she could resume the interview, he quickly added: "But do you want tickets?"

Ignoring the question, she carried on. Peter seemed to mellow out after a while and didn't interrupt again. It was almost surprising how well he'd listened: he was giving her real, insightful answers to her questions without a hint of flirtation. The final interview with Zack flowed easily, and she fled Stark Memorial Rink as quick as she could.

Transcribing the interviews was the easiest part. Days later, she would be hunched over her computer in the darkness of her shared dorm, playing and replaying the recordings and typing out the words onto the screen. Her concentration was briefly interrupted, though, when the door opened and a stream of light threaded its way through the room and onto the back of her head.

"Light bad!" She slapped her hands over her eyes, "Light very bad!"

"You're gonna go blind if you keep staring at your computer in the dark," MJ spoke in a warning tone, but ultimately closed the door.

"Then blind I must go," she sighed, swiveling on her chair to look at her roommate, "How was class?"

"Normal," MJ shrugged, sliding her bag off her shoulders, "But I have a little something for you."

"Something for little ol' me?" She gasped in dramatized delight.

"Yes," MJ grinned widely as her hand reached for the zipper of her bag, "Close your eyes."

She obliged immediately, her nose scrunched in anticipation, "I hope it's a million dollars. Is it a million dollars? Am I close?"

"Almost," MJ giggled. After a moment of anticipation, MJ gently grabbed her hands and place something into them. It was thin and papery and rectangular. Opening her eyes, she looked down to see a white envelope with 'Kitty' written out on the front. Her brows furrowed at the unfamiliar handwriting.

"Is there a check for a million dollars inside?" She asked as she cocked her head.

"No clue, it's not from me," MJ shrugged.

"Then who's it from?" Her fingers slid under the lip of the envelope.

"Harry gave it to me to give to you," MJ grinned, "He said it's from Peter."

She should've sailed to Greece when she had the chance. Inside the envelope were two tickets—Empire State University versus Pennbrook University this Saturday at seven. A long groan left her lips before she finally met MJ's eyes.

"You never got me that noose I asked for."

a/n — not sure how i’m feeling abt this one guys. hockey peter has been causing me brain rot tho so i couldn’t help myself.

[thelov3lybookworm]

You Think I Wanted This? (Part 3)

Part 1 Part 2

Summary: Are all royals this arrogant?

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A/n: Hehe 🤭

anyways, enjoy!

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Y/n tightened her hold on the muscular arm she held, shooting a warning glare at her husband, letting him know his temper would not help him.

He had the audacity to roll his eyes as he looked away, before nodding at something the lord in front of them said.

After the priest had declared Y/n and Xaden married, everyone had started approaching them to congratulate them, to get to know the legendary man Y/n had married.

And now, for the past few hours, Y/n had been stuck holding onto her husband's arm and laughing at every dumb joke the pompous lords and ladies threw their way, nodding along and pretending like she was not, quite literally, questioning their intelligence.

Her hand was cramping with the way she had not moved her arm once, her legs ready to drop her any moment, her back plotting her murder. She could also feel a headache coming, and knowing that her husband was likely going to spew some stupid arguments when they were in the confines of her bedroom walls, she was sure tonight she was going to die.

"I'll take my leave then, leave you to go get some rest." The lord the new couple were talking to laughed, winking and clasping Xaden's shoulder. His whole body shook with the laughter at his own insinuation, the poor buttons on his shirt looking ready to give up any moment as Y/n felt Xaden's arm tense under her grip.

She clenched her hand again for what felt like the hundredth time that night, pulling her hand back slightly to let him know that no, he couldn't punch everyone's teeth out.

From the corner of her eyes, she saw his jaw clenching, and sighed.

"Thank you so much for attending, my lord. Have a pleasant ride home and good night." Y/n mumbled, offering one of her most pleasant smiles as she tugged her husband away, who followed grudgingly.

"I should have killed him right there."

Y/n reigned in her sigh, signalling to her guards that she was about to retire for the night. The four men peeled themself off from the dais wall behind Y/n- where they'd been stationed at while Y/n had been engaging in conversation- and took their positions around her, two in front, two at her back.

Xaden glanced at the, and Y/n could feel his hackles rising.

A sharp glance at him had him sighing, glaring back at her.

The moment they were out of the great hall, Y/n let go of his arm, flexing her sweaty palm, disgusted.

One of her guards from behind her, Hart, wordlessly handed her a napkin, and she nodded back at him as she took it, wiping her hand.

She could feel Xaden staring at her, so she turned her head to meet his eyes.

"I don't like being sweaty."

His eyebrows rose, but she turned away, handing the napkin back to Hart, watching as his awaiting hand retreated.

Rolling her neck, Y/n continued walking towards her room without looking, the route through the winding passages and hallways now as familiar to her as the back of her palm.

"Every time, I'm reminded why I hate dinners."

All of the four guards chuckled, the two she could still see in front of her, Alex and Paul, shaking their head.

Reaching up, Y/n fixed her tiara, brushing off the stray strands of hair in her face as the group turned a corner and the door to Y/n's chambers came into view.

She was ready for this day to be over.

Alex reached out as they got closer, pushing open the door and walking into the sitting chamber that led into the different rooms. As soon as Paul and Alex stepped foot inside, they peeled away, waiting as they held open the doors for Y/n and Xaden, who walked straight towards the door on the opposite wall that led to Y/n's bedchambers.

Xaden seemed intrigued by the way he kept glancing at Y/n, her guards and around the chambers. Y/n though, she paid him no mind, as she came to a halt in front of the doors, patiently waiting as Hart reached forward to open the doors. Y/n smiled a little at all her guards, even Paul and Alex, who watched from the open doorway before walking back out into the hallway.

"Princess?"

Y/n paused when Hart called out, about to shut the door behind her.

"Yes?"

He shared a look with Floyd, who smirked. "Do you want us to leave our post for the night? You know," He shot a meaningful look towards a stoic Xaden, grinning. "give you some privacy?"

Usually, Y/n a very friendly relation with her guards and maids, but this was not something she found funny as she stared Hart and Floyd down until the two of them started shuffling awkwardly.

Then she turned away, throwing a Good night over her shoulder.

She walked over to her vanity, doing her best to ignore her bed, because she knew the moment she looked at the plush pillows and blankets, she would ditch the idea of getting undressed.

Through the mirror, Y/n could see Xaden taking in the room, his eyebrows high.

She knew stupid words were going to come out of that soft mouth, so she spoke before he could.

"You can take the floor. Or you can sleep on the bd, next to me. But no touching."

He blinked, a scowl taking over his face as he turned to her. "You think you can order me around? Just because you are a princess does not mean you're above everyone-"

"I am, actually."

He stilled. "What?"

Having finished removing the accessories the maids put into her hair, Y/n turned to meet his eyes. "My father rules over this kingdom. What makes you think I'm not above everyone?"

Usually, Y/n hated thinking about it, let alone speaking of her high rank, but this man was truly getting on her nerves with his handsome face and an equally ugly personality.

His eyes hardened. "Are all the royals this arrogant or are you a rare breed?"

Y/n was known to be one of the calmest people in the whole of the palace and the healers quadrant, but she would have to forfeit that title if he kept his mouth open.

She took a couple of steps forward, walking till she was right in front of him.

"You listen here Riorson. This, is my chambers. You either listen to me, or you listen to my father. The choice is yours."

He glared back at her, opening his mouth to speak. But she didn't let him as she turned away, walking over to the door that led to her walk-in wardrobe.

"Get comfortable, Riorson. You might get anything you want outside of these palace walls, but tonight, you stay here."

"And what if I don't?"

Y/n turned to glance at him, giving him a once over.

"You will lose your head if my father's loses his temper. Its that simple."

Y/n could hear him curse her, and she smiled as she turned away, dismissing him.

She was too tired to care at the moment.

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