#and i want to see maggie…. and meredith…. and i want them and amelia to have a sisters moment…..

[livvyofthelake]

also the greys anatomy season finale is on my birthday again this year so if i don’t get what i want i’ll scream and cry and throw up especially considering i have literally nothing else going on on my birthday this year like literally nothing. i’ll watch movies and call my mom and maybe pull weeds from my garden or something like literally nothing is happening no one will be around except my dad. so the three hour block of television i have that day is kind of it. krista this is your last chance with me.

[unexpected-character]

Hearts and Choices

Pairing: Amelia Shepherd x Reader

Summary: You were offered by Yang a position that will help further your career in Cardiothoracic instead of your old specialty Plastic Surgery. However, this could mean leaving Amelia behind. 

Warning: Abandonment issues (?), (idk if there’s more, but if you think so just tell me so I can add them)

Words: 1.4k

When I was offered to be the Director of Cardiothoracic Surgery in Switzerland, as Yang would be the next Klausmann’s Director of Surgery and Head of Surgical Research, she needed my expertise and helped her manage the load. I wanted to accept it immediately, knowing this would be a big step in my career in Cardiothoracic. However, I need to talk to Amelia. I don’t want to leave her after Meredith is gone, and just last month, Maggie did too. I know how she is when the people close to her are leaving.

I met her when Addie brought me to Seattle Grace. I was with her in Seaside moonlighting. They said she did work at the seaside before, but I hadn’t caught her as she was leaving and going to Seattle to stay with her brother. We weren’t together then, just shameless flirting and almost kissing ‘til Addison interrupted us. We reconnected when Cormac and I transferred with Cristina’s arrangement for him to be Head of Peds and I Head of Cardio but become Head of Plastics instead, as apparently Maggie and Winston are in Cardio now, so I have to find a job. Thankfully, I’m triple certified in plastics before transferring my speciality to become a surgeon in Cardiothoracic. Anyway, before I bore you with my achievements from a young age. Let’s return to my big problem about telling the woman I love about my job offer.

I had just finished my surgery when I saw her about to berate Yasuda as I heard the Kid may have dropped an instrument. I know that intern has been sleeping in on-call rooms, and I wonder what her story is about, but I don’t think the kid needs a lecture. So I had to interrupt.

“Hey, Dr Yasuda and Dr Shepherd. Can I talk to you for a minute?” I said to her and pushed her to a supply room before she could reply. I gave Yasuda a look, and she nodded in appreciation. “Okay, what’s going on, babe? I saw you about to embarrass the intern in front of many nurses and probably her patients.” I asked. She was just looking at the floor and exhausted for the day. “Hey, Amy. Talk to me, babe.” I approached her and raised her head so she could look at me. “I know about the offer,” she said, trying not to look and maintain eye contact. “Oh, okay. Well, first off, why did you look at my emails? That's kinda shitty as my privacy is – “ “I didn't mean to. It was just there in front of me when I asked to use your laptop when you were in the shower,” she interrupted. “Well, you should have just showered with me, you know, and we wouldn’t have this problem,” I said, and I could see that she was hiding a smile. I held her hands and kissed them to get her to calm down. I spoke, “I was going to tell you about it later when we get home, as I don’t want to keep this a secret from you. I love you, Amelia and I want your opinion about it as it would be a huge step for my career.” “Do you want it? Are you planning to take it?” she asked. “Truthfully, it is a very tempting offer and a huge one for me, babe. I was supposed to be here for the head of Cardio, but because Maggie and Winston happened, I had to give that up and become head of Plastics.” I said. “So you are taking it,” she said as she let go of my hand and sat on the floor, trying to settle her feeling and not wanting her tears to fall. I sighed. I followed and sat near her, taking her in my arms and letting her feel me. 

“I love you, Amelia. I have never loved someone so unique and complex that each waking moment I have with you is never dull and always unpredictable. When I came back here, you were with Link and also very pregnant, and I know you were happy, so I never disturbed you even when my feelings for you grew so much in the years that I finally know you. Then did you know how much it was killing me to see you being proposed to by Link on that beach? God, I thought my heart would stop, and that’s coming from a world-class cardiothoracic surgeon who knows it is a rare feat, so I left for three months. I went to see Yang and told her my predicament. I helped her in Klausmann, and I tried and tried to forget about my feelings for you, but I can’t. I told her that I had to go home. Home, even though I’m not sure where that was until I saw you performing that flawless operation on David. You were my home even if I wasn’t yours. It was always the wrong timing for us. I didn’t realise that you met Kai and, I guess, gotten to know them, and maybe you love them, but I just let it be.” “Uhmm, excuse me, but you weren’t so available yourself. You were hooking up with the new Plastics surgeon. I thought you didn’t want to do with me. I never expected that you also have feelings for me.” she said. “I know I wasn’t a saint, Amy. I am human too, and I needed people, and I hooked up with people, but you, on the other hand, were always in a relationship, so I didn’t do anything not until after a few months when I saw you in the backyard when Kai left you. I consoled you but kept my distance because I didn’t want to be your rebound.” “You are not my rebound. How many times do I have to tell you that.” “I know, Amy. I know. I just want to tell you that these past few months of being with you are never enough, Babe. I love you so much a-” “But you’re leaving. That’s what people say before they abandon me.” she interrupted again. “God, woman, let me finish.” I held her closer as if she’d run away and said,” I love you so much, and I love my job too. However, after many relationships on your part and flings from mine, I realised that I want it just to be you, and so I told Cristina that I have to talk to you about this, and here we are.” “You’re going to leave me, aren’t you? Just tell me already. Stop my suffering.” she said and hugged me tight. 

“You don’t listen, huh? I love you, and I will always choose you, Amy. I’m accepting the Chief of Cardiothoracic Surgery but not in Zurich. I’ll be accepting it here. I will tell Yang she can offer it to Ndugu even though he shouldn’t leave the hospital. That guy is amazing with his techniques, and Maggie taught him well.” I said. “You're not leaving. You are not leaving?” she said, surprised. “I’m not leaving, baby, but I want to explore the options of having Klausmann and Grey Sloan partner, especially with Cardiothoracic research. Cristina owes me some favours. Maybe she and I can talk about it as well as Teddy. Though I have to talk to Winston and maybe persuade him not to leave and instead be my co-chief.” I said out loud. “Thank you, and I love you. I do.” She said, kissing me passionately as if we didn’t need air to breathe.

We got interrupted when someone walked in, “seriously, you two? Not again.” Addison said. Amelia and I laughed, and I said, amused, “Why is it always you, Addie?” “I don’t know, and I hate you two.” She said and left the room. I got up carrying Amelia with me. I settled her down and said, “We’ll be okay, love. I love you, and I’m staying.”

After the missed opportunities of being with the woman I love, I don’t think I’ll ever leave now that I have the taste of it. I love her and Scout and my profession, so I guess I made the right choice.

[cosmicanemoia]

Kiss and Romance

Amelia Shepherd x Reader

Love Me Till You Leave Me part 7

Even though you're the one who asked Amelia out on a date, it was Amelia's idea to have dinner on a fancy restaurant.

It wasn't your kind of date, though it wasn't your first time having a date in a fancy restaurant. Amelia just assumed this is your usual scene cause you have friends who are doctors. A father who's a high-ranking officer. An ex who was in Boston for a Catherine Fox Award Ceremony. Amelia can't be blamed. You were friends and surrounded by rich people.

During your date, you found out that Amelia have four blood siblings, and she is the youngest of them and two chosen sisters. She has a kid named Scout, whom she co-parent with Link and Owen. She had a brother who was a neurosurgeon who died because someone failed to do a CT scan or burr holes. Three sisters whose name you don't remember because she didn't talk about them with much enthusiasm as she did her brother. She talked about Meredith and Maggie, and you can tell how much she care about them because she talked about them with warmth and gentleness in her voice.

Amelia, on the other hand, found out that you only have one sister. And that you came from a Conservative and religious family, and that you're the black sheep. She thinks that's one thing you have in common except you're better than her, you don't think that, but she knows it. She also found out that you don't stay in the same place for a long time, meaning that you move around a lot. That made her frown a little to herself.

You're now about to have the dessert, but you excuse yourself for a minute and go to the bathroom, amelia followed seconds after without you knowing.

When you come out of the stalls after you pee, you see her washing her hands. You washed your hands too. Right after you dried them, Amelia stops in front of you, which stops you in your tracks. She leaned in to smell you. "You always smell so good. What is your secret?"It's just th--" she cuts you off before you finish your sentence saying, "No. Don't tell me." You chuckled and walked forward, causing Amelia's back to be pushed against the wall. You put your hands on the wall, trapping Amelia, then you lean down, your neck is right in front of her lips, you moved closer, the skin of your neck almost meets her lips. "Here, let me help you," you said. Amelia inhaled as deep as she could inhaling your scent that she had grown to love. Before she exhaled, you moved your face to face hers, so you could kiss her. The kiss is your dessert. You move your hand that was on the wall to cup her face, and you move your other hand down to her waist.

You both were so lost in the moment that no one noticed the phone had rang three times, but you were pulled out of the clouds by a loud banging in the door, someone yelling to hurry up. You pull out from the kiss, and Amelia tries to chase your lips, still wanting for more, but you put your forehead to hers, and you both laugh.

Amelia got another call. This time, she's able to answer it. She's needed in the hospital for an actual emergency this time. You tell her it's okay and give her a quick kiss and push her to go. "Take care, Ames. I had a really good time!" You shouted at her. She gives you a flying kiss and waves at you, shouting, "Me too! Smell you later!"

Amelia went right home after she tended to the emergency and fell asleep right away, with a smile on her face. You wake up later than usual, not because you were tired from last night but because you were so at peace and you were more comfortable than ever.

A couple of days later, you went knocking at Amelia's door. You know she's home because you asked your friend who happens to be her boss, when will she have free time.

"Who the hell is knocking at my door this early in the morning?" She shouted, but it was muffled by the door, so you didn't hear it clearly. When Amelia opened the door, you could see the frustration in her face, but it quickly went away when she realised it was you. "Ames. Good morning! Is this a bad time?" I can co-" "No. No, no. It's fine. What are you doing here? Is everything okay?" Amelia cuts you off. You replied, "Yes, everything is fine. I just want you to come with me. Like on a date, DATE. Since you took me to a fancy restaurant, it's only fair of me to take you somewhere." Amelia asked you to come in and wait for her while she gets ready.

Amelia doesn't have any idea where you're taking her. You don't too, you just got up and decided to take her out on a date.

Your first stop is in your favourite food track. You ordered your favourite food, and you asked Amelia what she wanted. Once you got your food you both sat down at the table, you make jokes, and make each other laugh out loud which turn the heads of some curious people, but you both didn't care if the others are annoyed by your laughter, and you only cared about making each other laugh.

When you finished eating, you rested for a while before heading off to your next destination.

You were aboard the ferry admiring the view. Amelia looks back at the city inhaling the smell of the sea. "What a beautiful view," she said. "So beautiful!" You said while looking at her who was still looking at the city from afar, when she turns to look at you, you turn to look at the waters and let out a small, contended smile.

Moments later. You asked if you could hug her, to which she agreed. Your arms are around her, holding her tightly, your chest pressed against the back of her head. The wind blowing your hair and the sun kissing your skin. It wasn't cold, it wasn't very warm, it was just right, it was cozy.

When the ferry ride was over, you took her hand and dragged her around just sightseeing. You called a taxi and ride till you get to the space needle. Once you get there, it was time for lunch. Once lunch was over and you both had rested, you asked for the check and paid the bill, leaving a generous tip.

You stand up from your seat and hold your hand out for Amelia to take and ask her, "may I have this dance?" Amelia took your hand, she nodded confused, then stood up and said,"But there's no music. " You reached down in your pocket, took your phone out, and your earpods. You walked to the observation deck. You put one of the earpods to her ear and one to yours. You slowed dance for hours.

Amelia felt as if all of her hurt and problems had melted away. She thought to herself that she would want to be at that moment forever, but all things passed, so she engraved this memory to her brain.

Both of your arms are now wrapped around each other, swaying your bodies back and forth. Amelia let out a contented sigh, then chuckles a little before she say "you sure know how to sweep a woman off of her feet." You give her a soft laugh and replied "only the best for the best woman" "I bet you say that to all the ladies" she said sarcastically "only to the woman whom I think deserves it." You replied, sarcasm present in your tone.

You spend the whole day with each other. Not just the day, you also spend the whole night with each other. ;)

[swiftsdelucaa]

Can you write a Amelia shepherd x reader where they get married?

❛ 𝑴𝒚 𝑭𝒐𝒓𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 ❜

𝙋𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜: Amelia Shepherd x f!reader ♡

𝘼/𝙣: This was really cute to write <3 I hope you'll like it, so so so sorry for the wait, I've been a little busy...

You watched yourself in the mirror, Maggie and Meredith were putting the finishing touches on your hair, while Cristina adjusted the details of the dress. You looked at your image still in disbelief and with a faster heartbeat than usual. You couldn't even recognize yourself, you looked like a new person. This would have been the best day of your life.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Cristina asked as she adjusted your veil.

"Yeah, please don't add anything else, I feel like I thought about this too much" it was all you wanted, you loved Amelia with all yourself, and spending the rest of your days with her is what will make you happy.

"I'm serious, you could be left at the altar..."

"Cristina, no" Meredith gave her a little tap on her arm.

"Hey stop" Maggie said to them. You rolled your eyes laughing a little bit. "Today it's her day, and it will be full of love and of the most other beautiful things of the world" you smiled to Maggie and then got up. You did a little turn on yourself to see the effect that the dress had. It was quite long, above there was a deep neckline with small straps under the shoulder placed on the sides of the arms, while at the waist there was a silver stripe which then gave space to the wide skirt. You stopped in front of the three of them a moment.

"You're beautiful" Meredith said.

"Yeah, you hot girl" Cristina added.

"Thank you" you said smiling. All that happiness was becoming uncontrollable.

"Okay, I'll go check on Amelia" Maggie walked out of the room leaving you there to reflect between the anxiety and joy mixed together. God, you couldn't wait to be her wife.

"Say it, you're thinking to escape?" Cristina interrupted your thoughts again. Meredith laughed.

"Oh my God, why did I choose you as bridesmaids?!"

About half an hour later everything seemed ready. The guests were all in their seats, waiting for you. Amelia had already entered, but you hadn't seen her yet. You motioned for Meredith and Cristina to get going as they seemed very indecisive about what to do, and then it was your time.

When you appeared in the middle of the corridor, all eyes were on you. It raised some anxiety, but nothing that didn't calm down as soon as you met Amelia's eyes, making a huge smile appear on your face. Now you were in front of her and all you could think was... she's so beautiful, I can't believe now she's mine.

Unlike yours her dress was less baggy, it was snug enough on top of her to define her shape and it had cute shoulder seams. She was perfect, like this day.

You did nothing but smile at each other and talk with your eyes all the time the priest was talking, until the time for promises arrived. He decided to start with her, so she took your hands and squeezed uniting them with hers.

"Y/n L/n, what can I say? I mean, telling you that I love you and I'll always be here for you isn't enough... you taught me to love again, and made me feel more loved and desired than anyone else has done, so I'm grateful. Yeah you've been also one of the most annoying people I've ever met" you laughed keeping to look at her with shiny eyes. "But I've learned to appreciate the little good things that happens every day, but expecially that without you I'm nothing, so thank you for allowing me to be part of your life, for keeping me sober and alive, to always made me smile even in the worst situation, I love you so much, in an indescribable way" emotions became uncontrolled, no one had ever dedicated the most beautiful words in this world to you. You sighed for a second while a tear ran down your cheek, Amelia was holding the tears too, and you both continued to smile at each other. Now it was your turn.

"Amelia Shepherd, besides being the best thing I've ever come across, you've also been one of the hardest things I've ever been able to go through. I'm a girl who knows what she wants, but when you turned down every flirt or encounter by me and you really made me feel incomplete… like a crap” she and the others giggled, then she returned to focus on you. "I couldn't stand the idea of seeing you with another person, every time you spoke, smiled or just when I met those blue eyes I was lost, so I promised myself that I wouldn't give up. But finally today you will belong to me until the end of our days, and I'll be willing to do anything to make you happy, if you are I'll be too, you're a part of me" the tears kept filling both of your faces.

Zola, Bailey and Ellis walked down the hall towards you carrying your wedding rings. They were simply the cutest thing ever. You proceeded to exchange the rings and anxiously waited for the priest to ask that question.

“Amelia Shepherd, do you take Y/n L/n as your wife and promise to love and cherish her, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, for better and for worse, as long as you both live? she looked at you intently before answering.

“Yes, I do” she said with a smile.

“Y/n L/n, do you take Amelia Shepherd as your wife and promise to love and cherish her, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, for better or for worse, for as long as both of you shall live?” you gave her the same gaze.

“Yes, I do!” you exclaimed.

“Well, I officially declare you wife and wife, you may kiss” you waited no more that at the same time you approached pursing your lips in a long, intense kiss, filled with so much emotion it could have gone on for much longer.

Everyone stood up applauding, then you stopped and turned towards them smiling. Everyone cheered this day, the two of you, there was no better place where you wanted to be, from today you would have met a beautiful and a new life.

[nellie-elizabeth]

Grey's Anatomy: I Carry Your Heart (20x09)

Nick is so annoyingggg. This episode was full of multiple little irritants, to be honest.

Cons:

Like, look, I understand that Meredith is being a bad girlfriend to him, I do understand that. But Nick is still the most boring man ever invented for TV so it's hard for me to be invested in Meredith's love life with him. So when she's being dismissive and not prioritizing him, I'm like... so? Good for you. Leave his ass, Meredith, he's so generic I couldn't pick him out of a line-up. So I'm not invested on whether Nick decides to stick it out or not. I don't even know if I buy that Meredith would care that much if he suddenly vanished in a puff of smoke.

Link and Jo also suck in this episode! Their petty little fight over a patient just re-emphasized how uninteresting I find their romance. When they're happy, they're bland and forced. When they're snipping at each other, I just wish Alex Karev would barge into the room and take Jo back to run off with him so they can be happy. I've loved Jo for so long as a character but to be honest, with the news of Schmitt and Yasuda leaving next season, I'd swap Jo and Link for them in a heartbeat.

I was glad to see Maggie but she felt a little wasted in this episode? She and Winston have the awkward tension of near-divorce while still obviously caring about each other, and honestly it just bums me out again that they didn't make it work. They should have become another Bailey and Ben, where Winston is a character on the show and Maggie is just... off-camera, still his wife, still being a bad-ass surgeon somewhere. But they wanted to keep Winston in the pool for romance plot lines, so instead we've got this bummer divorce after some honest character assassination of Maggie to get there. I don't know. Seeing her should have been fun, but mostly I'm just bummed.

And Winston and Maggie's scenes together made me feel that spark, that connection, much more so than Winston and... Monica?? How dare. I wish Winston had just made a stupid decision and kissed Maggie when she'd tried to start something. But instead we get this frankly out of left field development with Monica. I get it, they're both just divorced and they're making a stupid rash decision. But this is just gonna make Amelia sad, and I don't like when Amelia is sad! Come on, Grey's.

Yasuda and Helm breaking up makes sense I guess, but I'm just sad that we didn't actually get to spend more time with these characters. This show has never known what to do with Helm, and now Mika is leaving next season, and it's just a bummer all around.

Adams is brooding personified. He finds out he might need to repeat his intern year, and he mopes about it. He's weird about Simone, who has no idea why. He gets offered a job, and now next week we're going to have to hear him agonize about that decision. He'll probably ultimately choose to stay, right? I'm bored. He should leave with Maggie, maybe that means Yasuda and Levi could stay instead.

Pros:

I was right that Owen and Teddy having drama about the secret funding would be annoying, but it was actually not that annoying, and Teddy getting fired is drama I like better for them as a couple, honestly? Their careers have been so messy and they've been through so many ups and downs, I could see being okay with a plot line where Teddy has to figure out what's next for her personally, with Owen's support. I've got my fingers crossed that this won't be too much of an irritant next season.

Kwan and Jules are great, I actually feel more and more invested in them, they're pretty much the only relationship on this show I feel fully excited about. Confirmation that Jules is queer was much appreciated, also. I think seeing them two of them talk and flirt kind of antagonistically and then hook up, do the pillow talk thing, it's all emphasizing why the Simone/Adams romance doesn't work. All we get with those two is the fraught angst of their complicated relationship. with Jules and Kwan, we see the back and forth, the hook-ups and then cutting themselves off before they can really be vulnerable, we get all that drama, but we also see them just... talk to each other? Enjoy each other's company, listen to each other talk? They have an actual foundation I believe in, so the fraught uncertainty of how they'll end up actually carries weight. I'm invested in seeing them together, because I know what that might look like, and it looks happy and fun and good.

Amelia and Meredith's Alzheimer's breakthrough is super interesting! I love how Amelia brought Derek into it, talking about how his contributions will be erased by their progress. Meredith feels that too, but she's also thinking of her mom. I love this connection for them, I love the Derek mentions. I want Meredith's recurring character moments on the show to be about this, not about Nick! My vendetta against Catherine Fox is still going strong, so I do wonder what I'll think of how that story develops as we move forward...

I got super emotional about the patient stories in this episode, the heart transplant stuff! You've got the couple who just moved in together, with the guy needing another heart transplant after the first one is failing. Then you've got the young man who gets a new heart and lungs. Turns out his heart is viable for the other guy, even though it wasn't viable for him anymore... slightly confused about logistics here but sure. In the end, both patients are successfully saved with the magic of organ donation, and the one guy's boyfriend tearfully hugs the parents of the younger guy. It was such a powerful beautiful moment that really made me tear up. Now that couple doesn't have to rush the wedding, they can take their time!

Looking back at the bulk of this episode, I'm annoyed with pretty much all the romantic drama in the show right now. And this is Grey's Anatomy, so that's kind of... most of the show. That said, there were still plenty of elements here I'm invested in, and that will always remain true! (What's with Jo collapsing in the promo for next week? That doesn't look good!)

7/10

[salt-pepper-jolex]

No Matter What

A sequel to Powdered Donuts, Princess Crowns, and Bubbles; in which Jo has a nervous breakdown about having this baby and has a scare, but it ends up okay.

Side note: I'm sorry for this roller-coaster. I promise there's happiness eventually. New chapter coming soon! Okay, I'm done, enjoy!

Jo's entire body shook as her thumb hovered over Alex's number, tears falling uncontrollably from her eyes. After a moment, she decided to just press the call button. Then, the familiar voice message rang in her ears. "You've reached the voicemail of Dr. Alex Karev. Sorry I couldn't come to the phone. Leave a message and I'll get back to you."

Despite the exciting week before, Jo couldn't shake the worry and unsteadiness that came with welcoming a baby into the world.

She chose to hang up the phone, not wanting to bother him. She scrolled up to find Meredith's number, and pressed the call button again, putting Mer on speaker. One ring. Two. Three. Finally, on the fourth ring, a familiar voice filled the room.

"Jo?" Mer's voice, filled with an even mix of concern and worry, rang out.

"Hey. I need to talk to you. It wouldn't hurt if Pierce and Shepherd were there too."

Meredith, sensing the pain in her voice, offered for Jo to come over.

"That'd be nice. I'll be there in twenty." She replied, a wave of relief crashing over her. She'd needed to tell someone about...whatever this was.

When she got there, she noticed Mer, Maggie, and Amelia waiting.

"Thank you for doing this." Jo's voice held so much pain and grief that no one else but the three women in front of her could fix. She looked up to them, like a little girl to her big sisters.

"What's going on?" Amelia spoke gently as they all sat down across from Jo, careful not to sound like they were interrogating her because they knew she had asked them to hear her and listen.

"I'm, um, pregnant," Jo said, her voice soft and small, laced with sadness and panic.

"Does Alex know?" Maggie asked, careful not to assume anything.

Jo only nodded her head, as if speaking would surface emotions that she had spent her whole life suppressing.

"How do you feel about it?" Meredith asked, noticing the way Jo picked at her nails, and fidgeted with her ring.

Jo shrugged. "Honestly, I don't know. This is the first time I've been pregnant in 12 years. And Alex doesn't know because the day I planned to tell him, I lost it. I shut him out, but we worked hard, and got here. Now, I don't know what to tell him. Because I know I can't put him, or us for that matter, through that again."

Amelia moved next to Jo, wrapping her arms around the woman that felt like a fragile little girl in that moment.

Knowing the women would listen, she kept going, "It'll break Alex's heart. And the worst part is Luna was so happy, and I don't know how to tell her that she might not get a little sister or brother."

"Jo, don't think for a second that he won't support you in whatever you choose to do. And yes, Luna's young. But she's also smart. She gets that from you and Alex. She'll understand."

In that moment, Amelia gave Jo strength through words no one else could find to tell her. They'd all had losses, Maggie had been broken before, and Meredith knew her pain better than anyone, but Amelia gave Jo the best possible advice, and the strength she needed right then and there.

Suddenly, everyone went quiet, with small smiles. Jo looks behind her to find Alex.

"Hi. What are you doing here?" Jo's voice was impossibly tiny, but only Alex could see the fear in her eyes.

"You weren't home, so I came here. Luna's with Robbins and Torres."

"I know, thank you for that." She laughs, humorlessly, and Alex picked up on it. "How much did you hear?"

"I heard most of it, but that doesn't matter. C'mere." He holds her hands before pulling her into a tight hug.

"I want Luna."

"I know you do, babe. What do you say we go get her and then, we can talk about our options over ice cream. What do you say?"

"I'm lucky to have you, baby."

"I love you. More than everything else in this world. I love you. And Luna. And this baby, but you need to hear me when I say this. I am in your corner. No matter what. Okay?"

"Okay." Jo said, knowing Alex's words were sincere.

"Let's go get our girl. We have sundaes to make."

After a series of thank yous, hugs, and heartfelt see you laters, Jo and Alex left. Mer and Maggie listened as Amelia started.

"We're lifelines now. We have to be there for them."

"I have surgery with Alex, I'll see what I can find out." Maggie offered before Meredith informed the both of them.

"I'll make sure Jo stays awake because that baby will be exhausting, knowing Alex."

Mer turns to see Zola, Bailey, and Ellis on the stairs.

"Auntie Jojo and Uncle Alex are having a baby?" Ellis asks.

"Well, we don't know, honey." Mer says, kind of stunned.

Maggie continues for her, "That's up to them."

"But, no matter what, you cannot say anything to anyone about this, okay?" Amelia says firmly.

All three kids nod in response and scatter to get ready for bed.

Back at the loft, Alex and Jo talked.

"I finally got her down. Can we talk now?" Jo whispered, her voice laced with nerves and panic.

"Of course. Hey, you have nothing to worry about. I promise, whatever you choose, you got me. I'm here for you, and if it comes down to it, we'll figure out what to tell to Luna." He moves to wrap his arm around her, then pulling the both of them up to do dishes.

"Thank you." She said as she started the water, although Alex tilts his head, a puzzled expression littering his face.

"For what?" He asked, his curiosity genuine as he scrubbed a plate.

"For being so understanding about it, and being so good to me."

"Of course. I love you, and I'm there for you. Always."

"Good, because I'm keeping this baby. If you're up for a mini-me." Jo's face lit up with a fragile smile that morphed into a solid one as she saw Alex's eyes light up.

"Really?" He asked, his eyes glittering with happy tears.

"We're gonna have a baby, baby."

The next morning, Amelia, Maggie, and Mer gather at work. They pass by Alex, who normally would be grumpy by now, but had a lightness to his walk as he checked on patients.

Jo had been wobbly and tired all morning due to morning sickness. But happy, nonetheless.

"Blech, this baby will not give me a break." Jo said, her face a touch pale as she leaned against the wall.

Amelia saw the sweat beading on Jo's forehead.

"Here," Amelia handed her ginger cough drops. "Trust me."

Jo wrapped her in a hug before falling to the ground.

"Jo! Hey, stay with me!" Amelia shouted, her voice tense. "I need some help here! Pulse is thready, breathing is shallow," she announced to a nearby Maggie.

"Let's get her on a gurney, page Hunt and Bailey," Maggie announced.

In the chaos, they hadn't seen Alex exit the patient room next to them.

"What happened?" Alex asked, his question soft.

"We're not sure yet. Bailey and Owen are running tests in there for now."

"Okay." Alex's body was rigid, his demeanor instantly changed.

"Hey, go see Luna. We'll page you when they're done." Maggie said calmly as Amelia got paged.

Alex nodded as he walked away to go see his Moonshine.

20 minutes later, Jo's eyes flickered as she woke up to bright lights and rails surrounding her on both sides. Alex, attuned to his wife, sat tall, informing her of the situation.

"Hey. You fainted in the hall. Your pressure was low and you had a thready pulse. Don't worry. You're okay." He held her hand, kissing it lightly.

But still, Jo's eyes shined with an unanswered question.

Alex, ever inclined, answered quietly, his eyes red and puffy. "Baby is fine, Robbins and DeLuca made sure."

"I'm glad, but that's not what I meant. How are you? I know that was scary." Jo asked, her voice raw.

"Honestly? That scared the hell out of me, but you're strong. I had a good feeling you'd be okay." His voice hung with a tone Jo couldn't quite place.

"Why does your voice sound like that? What's wrong with me?" Jo asks, her tone loaded with despair as her voice broke seeing Bailey walk in.

"Jo, after you fell, we did a work-up, and you were severely dehydrated, but we repleted your electrolytes and gave you fluids. You are okay. Your baby is okay. But, the surgery was hard on you. Unfortunately, I'm going to have to ask you to stay out of work for a few hours." Bailey's voice was heavy.

"Can I see Luna?"

"Of course."

"I'll go get her," Alex offered, his hand slipping away.

Bailey rushed to Jo's side as she saw the tears in Jo's eyes.

"Honey, what do you need? What can I do?" Bailey's response wasn't 'What's wrong?' and Jo was immensely grateful for it.

"All I did was work a shift, one shift. I didn't think to stop and take care of myself, and my baby almost paid the price for it." Jo's voice was filled with a grief Bailey completely understood.

"Look. I'm not gonna lie. You pushed the limits of your body. That cannot happen again. If you promise to take care of your body and let us watch you, you can work so long as you listen to your body."

A smile broke out on Jo's face. "Deal."

"Mommy!" Luna squealed, because she hadn't seen her mom in nearly 4 hours.

"We'll leave you be." Bailey said, Alex and Jo eternally grateful.

"We owe her." Alex started, leaning his head on Jo's shoulder as he climbed into the bed with her.

"Big time," Jo said before focusing her attention to Luna.

"Hey, Moonshine." Jo used the nickname Luna knew only from Alex and her, motioning for Luna to come closer.

Soon after, Luna whimpered, hesitantly curling further into Jo's body.

"What is it, Luna-bug?" Jo said before mouthing a 'What happened?' to Alex, who only shrugged in response.

"Mama, you left me." Luna said, her big, bright eyes filled with unspilled tears.

"What are you talking about, baby girl?" Alex asks, coming closer to the loves of his life.

"You left me because you love the baby more than me."

"Oh, honey. Never. Never, ever, ever will Mommy and Daddy love anybody more than you. We love you and your baby brother or sister so, so much, and nobody can match that." Jo's words suddenly filled Luna with joy, evident by the smile on the little girl's face.

Two weeks later, and Jo was fully recovered.

"Promise me you'll take it easy today?"

"Obviously." Jo knew her husband was just being careful, but even she noticed the involuntary sharpness in her voice. "Sorry."

"Hey, don't worry about it. I get it." And he truly did. The words, seemingly insignificant, made her melt.

Through shaky breaths and watery smiles, she spoke.

"Thank you."

"Of course."

"No, Alex. I mean it. Thank you. For this, for Luna, for- for giving me a chance at having a baby again. For all of it."

"Jo. You know I'd do anything for you. Getting to give you a baby was just an added bonus," he smirked, waggling his eyebrows.

"You are terrible."

"But you love me anyway. I love you, Jo." He bridged the space between them, putting his forehead to hers.

"I love you. I can't believe we're having a baby," Jo spoke mesmerized as awe filled her voice.

That night, the excitement wouldn't wear off, and if Jo was honest, she didn't want it to. And neither did Alex. They were the happiest people on earth, and nothing could take that away.

fin.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thank you so, so, so much to everyone who reads this, reblogs, or even looks at it. Put prompts in comments, and tell me what you think!

xo, Nikki.

Also, here's chapter 2!

https://www.tumblr.com/salt-pepper-jolex/759121165155516416/mo-matter-what?source=share

[crazy-dog-lady-81]

Ashes on the Wind

When their cell phone rang, Kai knew that something was wrong. No body rings you at 3.30 in the morning unless they absolutely have to or unless they’re drunk. But being that Amelia didn’t drink, she was very unlikely to be drunk calling them at 3.30 on a Tuesday morning. So, knowing that it must be something extraordinary, they accepted the call and immediately knew that they were right.

“Amelia, is everything okay?” Their voice might have been thick with sleep, but Kai’s mind was sharp and alert. They clicked on the bedside light and swung their legs out to sit up on the side of their bed.

At first, Amelia didn’t speak. It would have been impossible for her to do so through her slow and heart-rending sobs. It killed Kai to hear Amelia cry like that. Something awful had very clearly happened for her to be in so much pain and distress. Kai wanted nothing more than to be there with her, sheltering and protecting her from the cause of her pain.

“Amelia, what’s happened sweetheart?” they asked gently. Their need to know that she was safe was to the forefront of their mind. In the year and a bit that they had been together as a couple, Amelia had become the epicenter of their life. Their everything. Their world. If she or Scout weren't okay, then they weren’t okay.

They switched the call to speaker, and while trying to coax information from their girlfriend, they began searching for the first flight to Seattle. Seeing there was a seat available on a flight out at 7.30am, they booked it.

“Amelia, can you hear me?” There came a quiet “yes” in reply. “Good. That’s great. Can you tell me if you and Scout are both okay?”

“Yes, we are both safe, but the house is gone. There’s nothing left.”

Kai didn’t understand what she was telling them at first. How could the house be gone? When Amelia told them that there had been a fire, Kai’s heart sank.

“Jesus Amelia. I am so sorry, my love. Is everyone okay? Meredith? The kids?”

“Yes, everyone is okay. Maggie and Winston managed to get all three kids out and no-one was hurt. A blessing. I mean, think of the alternative.”

“Thank God. What happened? Do you know anything yet?”

“It has been a very rough and stormy night here in Seattle, with severe lightening. I heard Ben tell Meredith before we all left the scene that he thought that the fire might have been started by a lightening strike. It fits with the description that Maggie and Winston gave. They said it all happened fast. They were upstairs packing some of Meredith’s stuff and minding the kids while Mer was still at work. Link had Scout, thankfully. They said that all of a sudden they heard an almost deafening cracking noise and within a minute or so, they could smell smoke in the house. They grabbed what they could. Derek and Meredith’s wedding post-it and some other bits, got the kids and got out.”

Kai couldn’t imagine how terrifying that must have been. Fire and being confronted by it was one of their personal worst nightmare scenarios. The thoughts of it sent a shiver down their spine that caused them to shudder involuntarily.

“There were something like four fire crews on the scene within ten minutes but even in that time, the house was well on its way to being gutted. Did I ever tell you that Derek built that house for Meredith? Well, the original house belonged to Ellis, Mer’s mom. Derek rebuilt it, redesigned, and remodeled it for Mer. It was an act of sheer love and devotion. And in the blink of an eye, it’s all gone. It’s ash on the wind.”

She paused before asking, “Can you please come? I don’t know if I can get through this without you.”

They heard a wobble in her voice that made her seem so very vulnerable. Kai now desperately wanted to wrap her in their arms and never let her go.

“I’ve already booked a flight. It leaves Minnesota at 7.30am. So, I’ll be in Seattle for 9am, local time. Until then, I’ll stay on the phone just as long as you need me to”, they told her in a soft, tender tone.

“Thank you, Kai. I appreciate that. I just can’t believe that it’s all gone. Literally all I now own are the clothes on my back. All Scout’s baby pictures. Oh God! Kai, Christopher’s pictures. I can’t replace those so what if I can’t remember his face and what he looked like?”

The gutted woman began to sob again. It was an awful sound and one that hurt Kai right to the very core of their being. There was nothing that they could do to put that right for her. So, they uttered tender and kind apologies and I love you’s to her.

“I love you, too”, she gasped when the sobbing abated some time later. “I need you so desperately, Kai. I just want you to hold me and tell me that things are going to be okay.”

“Sweetheart, I’m coming. I will be with you soon. I promise. Where are you?”

“In a hotel. Meredith and the kids are with Maggie and Winston, but I couldn’t face staying there with everyone. It probably sounds crazy, especially with three kids, but the silence was deafening. They were so quiet from the shock, and I couldn’t cope with it. I was beginning to want a drink and I don’t want to break my sobriety. So, I came to the Central and booked a room. When you’re in the air, I will need to attend a meeting.”

“I am so proud of you for taking the steps that you needed to take to protect yourself.”

“Thank you. I kinda’ thought I was being a selfish, self-absorbed asshole.”

“Absolutely not. Meredith will understand. They all will.”

Looking at their watch, they saw it was coming on for 5 o’clock. They got up and began to find clothes for the day. Once dressed, they also pulled out their suitcase and set about packing for their trip. They made a mental note to call David to let them know that they’d be out of the lab for a while. Kai knew he’d be okay about their absence given the circumstances. Everyone always thought that he was a monster, but Kai knew that wasn’t the case. David Hamilton was a good man, with a kind heart. He’d understand.

“I don’t know what happens next. I mean where will I live? I need a home for Scout. A hotel isn’t a permanent solution.”

“You two can live with me. I wanted to surprise you, but I guess I can tell you now. I'm moving to Seattle.”

There was stunned silence before Amelia spoke.

“Are you being serious?”

“It’s true. I just want to be with you, so I spoke to Meredith and David a few weeks ago about transferring to Grey-Sloan and continuing my research work there. They agreed to accommodate me. I got the official approval two days ago. Which was a good thing seeing as I already have rented an apartment over there. It’s already furnished so we can go there today when I get to you.”

“You are moving? Permanently? I can be with you all the time?”

“If you want to, then yes. I want you to be with me. For us to be together.”

“Me too so, okay. Yes, please.”

“Yes?”

“Yes”.

“Okay. Good, that’s settled. My uber is just here.”

There were sounds of fabric rustling as Kai put on their coat and did up the lacings of their shoes. The wheels of their case rattled across the tiles of their loft. They pulled the door closed and keys jangled as they locked the door.

“How are you feeling? You hanging in there?”

“Yes. I feel exhausted suddenly. The adrenaline wearing off after the initial rush. I think I will sleep after my AA meeting.”

“Good plan. When you wake up, I will be there with you, and we can get ourselves to the apartment.”

Car doors slammed and Amelia heard Kai speak to the driver briefly. Feeling better in the knowledge that Kai would soon be there, she told them they could hang up. She’d be okay. They told her that they loved her and let her go.

As the cab drove towards the airport, Kai felt a myriad of emotions flow through them. Worry, concern, impatience but also hope. An awful thing had happened, one that had changed everything and had forced a new beginning for Amelia. They were determined to support her through the trauma and to make the next chapter of her story a good one. One where Kai featured prominently and where they were together for as long as Amelia would have them.

[kaimelia-endgame]

You Need to Relax

Amelia was stressed. Stressed and angry and irritated. I mean she had only been at the hospital for 42 hours straight! There was absolutely no reason for Meredith and Maggie to ban her from the premises and make her go home to sleep. She huffed and puffed around the large empty house. All the kids at school, Scout with Link for the day, and the sisters still at work. She’s pacing the living room worrying to herself about the patients she had to leave. She knows they’re stable but she left them in the hands of interns! Her own nephew being one. And she knows he has good instincts but he’s also exactly like her during that time of her life. This makes her nervous about going home. She knows that it will be okay and that Meredith and Maggie and other attendings are there to look out for her patients but she just can’t stop worrying and pacing angrily. There’s no way she could sleep right now. Just as she starts talking out loud to herself ranting about Meredith sending her home her phone starts to ring. Great. I know something was going to happen. But her face lights up when she sees the name. Lover❤️. Amelia hasn’t seen Kai in person for about two weeks. Two weeks wayyyyy too long. She immediately picks up, longing to see their beautiful face.

“Oh I’m so glad you called, I miss you so much by the way. Also I love you. But anyway Meredith and Maggie banned me from the hospital and I was only there for like 40 hours and I need to go back and-“. “Amelia stop, stop, take a breath”, Kai chuckles under their breath as Amelia stops and takes in a huge gulp of air. “What’s got you so worked up, baby?” Amelia gives a shy smile knowing they’re not going to like her answer. “Well… I was at the hospital for almost two days straight and hadn’t slept so Meredith and Maggie sent me home to sleep”, she looks down at the floor waiting for a response. “Amelia….” They say sternly. “Look I know, I know, okay? It’s just that the new interns are morons and I can’t trust them with my patients and you know what I should just go back, fuck it”. “Amelia Shepherd if you don’t take a seat right now there are going to be some serious consequences”. She looks back up her her phone and makes eye contact. She gulps at their stern face and worried eyes. She walks over to the couch and plops down, defeated. “Look babe, you really need to get some good rest. You’ll be back at work soon enough and you have Scout tomorrow. I also need you well rested for when I come to Seattle in a few days” they smirk. “Oh and why is that, Bartley?” “I just have a few things in mind. But how about for right now you go put on the sweatshirt I know you stole from the last time you were here and get in bed. And they maybe I could sing you to sleep?” Amelia blushes slightly. She really thought she had gotten away with that sweatshirt. “Kai, I really just don’t think I can sleep right now. I’m so stressed”.

“Alright well I might have another idea. Can you just go get in bed and call me back when you get there? Please for me” they give her their best puppy dog eyes through the screen. “Um yeah okay I guess, but only because you’re so cute”. Amelia goes upstairs and digs their sweatshirt out of a drawer. She brings it up to her nose and inhales deeply. God she misses them. Like she really misses them. She just wants them to be here with her and hold her. Amelia pulls off her shirt and bra and slips the sweatshirt over her head. She opts for no pants because duh, no pants allowed in bed. She curls up under the blankets on her side and goes to FaceTime Kai again. She smiles when their face pops back up on the screen. “Alright so what’s this other idea of yours?” she says as she cocks her eyebrow. “Well, you need to relax, and I know exactly how to help you with that”. “Oh is that so. And what exactly would you recommend, Dr. Bartley?” “You’re going to touch yourself while I watch. But you’re going to do exactly as a tell you and not break any rules”. “Kai I’m too stressed to do this right now it’s not going to work. I need you here with me. I need to feel you touch me” Amelia whines. “I know baby but I’m not there right now. So this is the next best thing. I want you to get your vibrator out of the nightstand and grab your AirPods”. Amelia does as she’s told, secretly already a little turned on by their demands. Before Kai, Amelia would never give up power in bed. She had to be in control. In her personal and professional life, always needing complete control. But with Kai, she always felt safe. They are definitely more dominant than her and she lets them have their way with her. She’s never experienced that with anyone before them. She gets what she needs and gets back in bed. “Okay put your AirPods in and then I want you to prop your phone up so I can see you. Then lay back and close your eyes for me”. Amelia does as she’s told once again. “Alright just keep your eyes closed. Pretend your hands are mine. I want you to start running your hands across your stomach, your legs, arms, everywhere. But don’t touch anywhere else yet, understand?” “Yes” she breathes. She didn’t want to admit it yet, but this was already kind of working. With the noise canceling on her AirPods, their voice was all around her. With her eyes closed, their voice in her eyes, and their smell on the sweatshirt, she could almost believe they were there with her. “Now I want you to start teasing your nipples through the sweatshirt. Do not take it off.” After several minutes of this they can already tell Amelia is getting restless. “Kai?” She say as she bites her bottom lip. “Yes, baby?” “Can I touch myself now?” “What do you say when you ask for things, Amelia?” “Please can I touch myself”

“Good girl. Yes you can. Slowly. And gently”

Amelia slides her right hands down to the waistline of her underwear. Although she doesn’t want to admit it, she’s already soaking wet. She pulls the fabric aside and start rubbing circles on her clit, already starting to moan. “Hey hey. Slow down baby you’re not allowed to cum yet. Follow directions”. Amelia doesn’t listen, she can’t stop now. She keeps going, drawing tight and fast circles around her clit. Her hips buck against her own hand and she lets out a filthy moan. “Shepherd if you don’t stop right now there will be serious punishments when I get back and you and I both know you don’t want that”. Amelia does know. Kai has somewhat of a sadistic side to them under their calm and collected demeanor. The last time she broke a rule they didn’t let her cum for a week. She whines and stop her movements completely. “Good. Now I want you to grab the vibrator and turn it on the lowest setting. And you are not allowed to cum until I tell you”. She whines again. “Whyyyyy? I thought you wanted me to relax”. “You need to do as you’re told. Giving up control for a bit will you help you let go and relax. Now go on”. Amelia turns the vibrator on low and rests it against her aching clit. It already feels so good, too good. “I’m going to countdown from ten, and when I get to zero you will stop. Understood?” “Yes”, she sighs. She focuses on their voice and the intense vibrations but nothing else. She lets her brain empty and her body starts to relax. They count down from ten four times. By now Amelia is a moaning, begging mess. “Please Kai, please I need to cum. Let me please”

“Not yet baby. Now I want you to turn the vibrator all the way up and we’ll go again”. Amelia is speechless. “Kai..please. I can’t take it”

“Yes you can. Be a good girl. You can do it”. With their praise she’s melting again. When they talk to her like that, she’ll do anything they want. She turns it to the highest setting and places it back on her clit. Kai starts to count down from 10 again, but this time very slowly. “Kai, kai, please don’t do this. Please I need to” Amelia’s breath is erantic and she’s bucking her hips violently. She’s right on the edge, just waiting for them to give her permission, but they don’t. “Zero. Amelia stop”

“No no! I have to cum I can’t please please Kai I can’t” “stop right now or you know what will happen”. Amelia reluctantly moves the toy away and cries out from her ruined orgasm. She’s whimpering and whining, just waiting for them to talk again, let their voice surround her. “Shhhh baby, it’s okay. Just calm down. You’re being so so good. Can you do one more for me? Just one more time, baby” they soothe. Amelia nods her head and starts again. Kai starts the countdown again, a little faster than the last one but still too slow for Amelia’s liking. At this point Amelia feels like she’s about to explode. The pressure in the base of her stomach is so intense, the vibrations almost too much. She’ll do anything for Kai to just let her cum. She’s not listening to the numbers anymore. Just there soft but commanding voice in her ears. She’s rocking back and forth hard against the vibrator, one hand clutching the sheets. If they don’t let her soon, she’s not going to make it. “Amelia?” They whisper. “Y-y-yeah?” “Open your eyes” she opens her eyes and locks hers with theirs. They wait a moment relishing in their girlfriends beauty, right on the brink of release before whispering “cum for me, Amelia”. Not expecting it, her body just reacts. Her whole body goes stiff as she arches off the bed, cumming hard with a scream. She rides out her orgasm until it’s too much and she turns the vibrator off. She rolls onto her side and grabs her phone. Body limp and relaxed. “Good girl, you were such a good girl for me. Good job baby. So good”, they soothe. They watch her as she calms down, her breath evening out. “How are you feeling, baby?” “Mm, sleepy” she mumbles, letting her eyes close again. “Why don’t you keep your eyes closed and I’ll stay on the phone and read to you until you fall asleep?” “Mmmkay” Kai gets up and grabs a random old neuroscience textbook. “Chapter 1”. They get about 3 sentences in before realizing she’s already fast asleep, clutching their sweatshirt. They laugh quietly to themselves. “Can’t sleep, huh? I knew it would work”. They admire their sleeping girlfriend for a few more minutes before whispering “I love you” and ending the call.

[nighthawkwrites]

Bear with me, but that may have been the least thrilling mid-season finale in a while.

(spoilers ahead)

I think we all knew the house was going to catch on fire, so that wasn’t much of a surprise. But if you’re going to do that, make it dramatic for goodness sake. Make it thrilling. On the edge of your seat. Someone or something doesn’t make it out. Not the last two seconds of the episode and everyone’s watching it burn. And if you do take it that route, make it heart wrenching and devastating. Make my heart break for Meredith, the kids, Amelia, for the memories that house holds. It just didn’t pull at my heartstrings like I thought it would.

What makes me most annoyed is that pretty much every other couple or pairing was featured EXCEPT Amelia and Kai. Maggie and Winston. Jo and Link. Owen and Teddy. Meredith and Nick. Heck, the new intern pairings.

Just a little text. A small mention of the sexy neuroscientist in Minnesota who she’s in a relationship with. What’s the point of establishing Kai and Amelia’s relationship in S18 if you’re only going to show them for just a smidge of an episode in the first half of the next season? Just sex and lingering looks at that. No talking. No answers. And don’t get me wrong, I’m more than grateful for 19x03. But come on. I think I speak for all kaimelia stans when I say I need more.

On another note, we finally got to see Amelia in surgery! It’s been too long, and I’ve missed her scrub cap lol. The medical for this episode was so good and it reminded me of old grey’s.

Now, if it’s what I’m expecting, the writers spent these first 6-7 episodes to build up Meredith and Nick’s exit, as well as establishing the new intern class, before moving on to the attending’s storylines.

Not surprised about Owen’s suggestion to Teddy about applying to be chief. And honestly, I’m not mad about it. I think she’d make a great chief. And Maggie, I’m sorry girl, but if Winston wants to change specialties, let him! I’m also excited to see where this new clinic is headed. I’m here for more Addison and Carina content!

Hard to tell from the promo if they will pick up where they left off or if there’s a small time jump. We’ll see if the writers can redeem themselves in the second half.

Now I shall channel all this into my writing for the next three months.

[adisolomon2005]

IT Is So Hard To Say Goodbye

Summary: Maggie, Amelia, and Meredith help Lexie grieve over her her father's death.

Set up after "The Winer Takes It All (15x11).

Maggie, Amelia and Meredith were in the living room when Amelia said, "I'm worried about Lexie; she hasn't spoken to me since her father died."
Suddenly, Meredith's phone began to ring.
"It's mine," Meredith told them. "I'm going to get it."
"Hi Mark, how is Lexie doing?"
"Wait she is not with you?", Mark asked her as he held his one year old son.
"No, she doesn't."
"She doesn't answer my calls and I have no idea where she is."
Meanwhile, Amelia and Maggie heard a knock at the door, and went to open it. They found Lexie, her eyes full with tears.
"I am afraid that if I had stayed with Mark, I might have killed him. May I come in?"
"Of course you can״, Amelia told her.
"Have you seen Lexie?" , Meredith asked her sisters in panic.
Then Meredith saw her sister and breathed a sigh of relief.
"Oh god Lexie, Mark got worried."
"I am not a kid. I am fine״, Lexie replied.
"Lex, you are not fine. Your father just died", Maggie told her.
Lexie said, "This is the reason I couldn't be with Mark. Please stop worrying about me״ ,She sat on the couch.
"What are we going to do?" Meredith asked worriedly as the girls walked into the living room.
"Sorry Mer, I know how crappy dad he was to you."
"Lex, please just talk to us."
"When my dad died, I was only 5 years old. I was afraid, hurt and confused. I know that if it happened now, I would still feel the same way because that's how I felt when Derek died. You feel like a lost little 5 year old child."
"I have a five years old kid. I can't feel like one. I really appreciate it, but I don't want you to worry about me, I am going to be fine."
"I don't think it's possible. We would always worry about you. When Derek died, you never left me and Amelia for a second, even though his death was hard on you too״ , Meredith told her.
"It's just stupid."
"It doesn't matter, we are your sisters and we love you. You can complain about everything you want, and we will listen to you, and no matter how stupid it is." , Maggie told Lexie.
"Sofia and Zola baked for me peanut butter cups. That made me think of my mom. Once when my mom was sad, I baked her a cake. The cake was awful, but my mom cried of joy because I made it to her״, Lexie said smiling.
"I am a bad mother."
Amelia, Meredith, and Maggie all said in unison, "What?"
"I left my kids in the middle of the night just because my father died."
"You didn't leave them. They are with their father. Lexie, you are allowed to grieve. Mark gets it, he is just worried about you. We are worried all about you״, Amelia said.
Then, they saw Zola descending the stairs. Surprised to see her aunt, Zola quickly rushed up to hug her.
"Auntie Lexie, did you like the peanut butter cups we made for you?", Zola asked her aunt.
"Yes Zozo, they were the best I've ever eaten."
Zola went to the kitchen, and came back with a glass of water.
Zola said, "I love you so much Auntie Lexie," and then she hugged her again.
"I love you too, Zozo," Lexie said, as the girl walked up the stairs.
"You see ,Lex? You are a great mother and a great aunt. Zola, Bailey and Ellis adore you״, Amelia told her.
"Would you like to sleep here?" Meredith asked her.
"I would love that," Lexie responded, smiling.
"I know it's stupid, but I am afraid to sleep alone."
"You don't have to. You can sleep with anyone you want״, Meredith told her
"I love you so much.", Lexie said as she hugged her sisters.
"We love you too״, Maggie told her.
"I'm gonna call Mark. He is really worried״, Said Meredith.
"So let me talk to him. He won't leave us alone until I will talk to him."
That night, Lexie slept in Meredith's bed.
"Meredith?"
"Yes?"
"Thank you for visiting dad. I know it meant a lot to him, even if he didn't deserve this."
"Well, he gave me the best thing I could have asked for," Meredith said, smiling at her sister.

[mayasdeluca]

How to put my thoughts together...

The first thing I will say which we saw in the opening scene and then later after the call when Maya was trying to send an apology text, is that although Maya and Carina are still not on the same page, Maya doesn't nor does she want to take her anger out on Carina and is trying to get them back to good...you know except the one thing Carina says will do that.

I also agree with you and your other Anon that Station 19 has too many side projects to give 100% to any of them; jack of all trades, master of none so to speak. I wonder if the reappearance of Diane is because Vic wants to transition (like Diane did) to a firefighter therapist especially since...I mean is she okay health wise or is that something the show was like meh, we told this story long enough and dropped it?

Maya falling was not unexpected to me but I hate how the when it is convenient for the show, they ALL leave on the call and no one will be around to find her. Shouldn't someone have stayed behind and be on desk duty? It's obvious they're gonna have Jack save the day. Like he goes back to the station because he forgot something and sees they're out on a call, sees Maya's turnout on the floor, hears the treadmill going and goes upstairs to check and finds Maya. And when Maya does get better, they'd probably ask Jack for his sperm to try again for a baby because he saved Maya's life. I mean the show IS that predictable.

Onto Greys...that I sat through thinking Carina would be in more than 30 seconds or that they would bring Maya in once I saw ALL the station 19 cast in the credits.

Was it really a big deal when Lucas told the interns he was a Shepherd, no. Is he really a Shepherd, no. And by that I mean that name doesn't make him a surgical prodigy since I suspect his mom is Nancy who is an OB-GYN (which is probably why he knew Addison best) and the rest of the family are just doctors not all surgeons. Like when Meredith showed up and said she was a Grey or when everyone found out Jackson was THE Avery but no being Lucas Adams doesn't make you anything special.

Shit or get off the pot with Link and Jo, this is ridiculous now. You broke up Link and Amelia for nothing. And why are Winston and Maggie at odds, their fighting makes zero sense and is causing drama where there doesn't need to be. And all the interns hooking up with each other except for Mika and they won't bring back Helm who would be the perfect match for her.

And lastly, I just find it amusing that Harry Shum Jr. who started as just a back-up dancer on Glee with almost no lines has pretty much the biggest TV career of all the Glee alums.

I agree, Maya is definitely trying to process things in her own way and trying her best to navigate things with Carina at the same time but it's obviously difficult because it's not the way Carina wants her to and Maya is doing it on her own terms. The communication is still off so that's why they're still stuck in this mess that they're in.

Yes, they have too many characters that don't really have a specific purpose but I do like how they had Vic discover hers in this recent episode. But there are still characters that are kinda just there...like Jack and even Ben lately and Travis' whole mayor thing that just take up time with stuff that isn't necessary. I don't know how they're going to bring Diane back into it. I would be shocked if it's specifically for Maya even though I'm sure she's going to have to do a full recovery physically and emotionally before heading back to work but I'm sure Jack will have to get therapy too if he's now thinking of returning to work after working with the fire camp girls so who knows. It does seem like Vic's health issues were either dropped or are magically fixed now.

Yes it's frustrating how they always do things like that to fit the plot line/story they're trying to tell. I'm almost positive it will be Jack though because like you said they are going to make it a point to have Maya forgive him in the long run but I really hope they don't do the whole sperm thing again, that would be ridiculous and so stupid if they didn't learn their lesson the first time. I'm still hoping Carina is pregnant anyway and we won't have to worry about that.

I was super disappointed with Carina's appearance on Grey's...like that's really all they had her do? They really just don't know how to utilize her and it's so sad because they used to be able to so well. I don't get what changed. Once I saw that Danielle's name wasn't listed in the guest star credits I knew they weren't going to continue it and it was going to be a let down. All the "crossovers" between the two shows are now.

Yeah Lucas is getting a little annoying with the whole Shepherd thing. It feels like they may be doing a slow burn type thing with Jo and Link but who knows. I'm glad they dropped the idea of him with Jules but I still don't get why they messed up Amelia and Link. They clearly aren't invested in Amelia and Kai because Kai just comes and goes whenever they please. Maggie and Winston are so forgettable and the angst isn't even believable because I feel like they're just there half the time and you don't even realize. It came out of nowhere this fighting between them. Ugh I know! Is Helm gone for good or what? She forever deserves better.

Haha I know right? Good for him though because Mike Chang was so underrated and he was so underused! And now look at him.

[kindchenschema]

& to the points you made in my other ask, yes, yes and yesss. LOVE what you said about maggie like so true. i get being territorial but the fans go past that and get viciously nasty and it negates any real criticisms. she’s my baby but im glad she’s free from the show tbh because they weren’t giving her anything to work with anyway.

and SLC forever! pls go on about puppy amelia if u want lol because on paper she’s exactly the kind of character i should live for but ive never been able to get into her? idky like even knowing her plot of private practice hasn’t helped. and i wanna get the hype i have fomo lmao

& to ur other ask where you outlined ur faves and potential ships, first of all, inspired choices love it. and second, you didn’t ask but i would add tedstina. didn’t see it for the first time but on my second watch they jumped out to me and they’ve been my main non canon ship forever. cannot believe the writers had them arguing over that man when they could’ve ditched him to go eat each other out and then cured heart disease or something. a shame lmao 3/3

i feel the same way, if you asked me to tell you what maggie did in her last 3-4 seasons on the show i would have to plead the fifth or something because i genuinely do not know 😭 but i do remember watching those seasons and being like damn i miss s11-12 maggie (the riggs drama between her and meredith was like contender for top 5 annoying things to happen on this stupid ass show and it pretty much went downhill from there)

puppy amelia... um okay 😶 well what do you wanna know 🤪

no um 😭 like ok idk i just love when characters are all "i love you please let me love you and please love me back" and the other person is like.. cold and lowkey hates them at first but reluctantly grows to love them.. and lets them sleep curled up at the foot of their bed or reaches out to pet their hair when they've had a bad day like OKAY !!!!! will never forgive the writers for forgetting about mermelia after s12 like it was genuinely the most complex, angsty, bordering on sadomasochistic relationship to ever happen on this godforsaken show okay stop I NEED TO SHUT UP NOW but like as i said . it was/is GENUINE brainrot.

(side note whenever i rewatch s12 i get this like. overwhelming instinct to protect and take care of amelia like i literally become a butch lesbian for her. my butch lesbian serve 💅)

(in particular i also think the whole "meredith forgiving amelia for being the wrong sister and the wrong shepherd" is so...... mitski washing machine heart "i know who you pretend i am".... much to consider)

ok now i will shut up frfr this is what happens when you ask me about mermelia and girl don't get me Started on addimelia because genuinely i'm Kind of deranged, but you know what, i love myself and that's all that matters ❤️

anywayyy 😋 yes you probably didn't see but shortly after posting that i went back to add tedstina because HELLO, how could i forget about tedstina (well i haven't rewatched their main seasons for a long time that's how), i don't know what those two had going on but it was definitely something homosexual. there was a man there for some reason but literallyyy cristina going on and on about how much she loves teddy (esp when you consider that her type is canonically tall and blonde *cough* izzie) and teddy being like wow cristina you're my best student you're so smart and talented and let's make out 🥰

thank you soooo much for these anons, they really make my day (even if i don't get to them immediately) and please stay in contact even though there won't be new episodes for a while <3

[thundergrace]

I’m finally rewatching Greys after stopping when Callie left and wow I forgot how good season 11+12 where once they found their groove. I think both seasons get overshadowed by the loss of Derek and Callie and I get it, but the shift to making Maggie, Callie, Meredith, and Alex a new squad is pretty awesome. And really believable. That’s something I always loved about Greys, the unexpected but thoroughly convincing friendships and relationship dynamics. Even when I hated certain pairings, I could (for the most part) see where they were going. Anyway, I missed Maggie & Alex especially and your tags on their old gifs are great. Their friendships era was everything. Also, I forgot how interesting Callie and Maggie were. I know you didn’t seriously want them to go there (me either) but damn they would’ve been fun and hot lol

Yes! I really enjoyed seasons 11 and 12. I also stopped watching when Callie left. So many strong characters & complicated dynamics made for some really intriguing and unexpected friendships. I do miss that.

Yeah Callie/Maggie were definitely more of a tumblr ship for me. But that happened a lot cause I literally shipped Callie with EVERYONE lol now, Maggie and Amelia on the other hand I'd have liked to see but the 'sort of sisters' bond with them and Meredith would've made that weird (or so I thought but then they put her with Jackson when their parents became a thing so....).

Anyway, I've gotta figure out how to find the one Caggie fic that exists. I believe my old friend @thezenparadoxfanfictionblog was right that one. But I don't think Zen is even on tumblr anymore 😕

[captainsavre]

Greys does love adoption (Zola, Leona, Pru, Luna, even baby Cristina was adopted by one of her dads in her backstory and Jack and his non-bio sister, and Maggie was adopted...I'm sure I'm forgetting someone).

But both Meredith and McDreamy and Owen and Teddy and Amelia ended up having bio-kids after adopting, so maybe that's something for you to look forward to?

yes totally!! and i’m not against it, i’m really happy we finally get to see them being mothers and it’s gonna be lovely. but it just sucks that they made Marina chase that dream for two seasons to all end with something they never even mentioned 🤷🏻‍♀️ a big expectation was built, to finally see a wlw couple exploring the IVF process and now 🤷🏻‍♀️ (so much time was wasted with so much nonsense on season 5 when we should already have it all by now 😑) i just hope it won’t be ignored and they still explore it through the season…

all i want now is Carina with her positive pregnancy test at the finale and the show to get picked up by other network/platform so marina can have their own baby on season 8 🥹❤️‍🩹

this whole situation just sucks and my head is a big mess 😔

[nellie-elizabeth]

Grey's Anatomy: Wasn't Expecting That (19x02)

Nick is the most boring character Grey's Anatomy has ever written! Sorry!

Cons:

Like, seriously. Meredith's whole speech about how she went numb when she lost him... please. I think my problem with him is that it's hard to think of him being anything more than a blip on Meredith's radar. Her life has been filled with vibrant and interesting characters, and Nick is not vibrant or interesting.

You know I have to complain about this... Owen and Teddy. I will say that the somewhat comedic marital woes are a step above the angsty, overwrought drama we usually get with these two, but it's still not exactly pleasant to watch all the same! I was complaining last week that Owen's whole plot thread last season led to absolutely nothing in the way of real consequences. Well, apparently the consequences are going to be marital problems between Owen and Teddy. Yippee. Can't wait to see that. Ugh.

Pros:

I continue to enjoy seeing Meredith as chief even if I'm not thrilled about the Nick stuff. The episode ends with a reminder of the other part of Meredith's life that we don't get to see much of: she is a mother. Zola looks so big, it's crazy how long this show has been on the air. While she's making a presentation on her hero, her grandmother Ellis Grey, she panics and talks about how Meredith and Maggie are both also going to get Alzheimer's and die and she'll be all alone. First of all, Zola, that's a super relatable anxiety. I'm curious how this story will continue, if we're going to loop around to that looming threat of Meredith's health. After all, it's been roughly two decades since this show started. She's got to be getting close to the age her mother was when she exhibited symptoms, right? Crazy to think about.

It's fun to see Bailey get some time away from the hospital! She deserves it, and seeing her settled into her role as a mother is a special treat after all the drama and pain she underwent on her journey to get there. She and Jo being mom friends is such a lovely little detail. This show is inconsistent at best at showing these people having lives outside of their work, but when they get it right, I often really enjoy it.

The interns continue to impress me. It's early days yet, but they all feel distinct and interesting. I liked that there was a medical mystery this episode that they all got to come together to solve. They save their patient's life, although he is forced to have his leg amputated. I like how this played off of various strengths and weaknesses among the various interns. Simone gets to have the insight about the diagnosis, Jules gets to amputate his leg, but things almost go badly when she can't control the bleeding. I loved the scene of the two of them in the gift shop at the end of the episode, calming themselves down. I could see a real friendship forming there!

Not much of a friendship forming between Blue and Lucas, however. The cockiest of our new batch of interns sees Lucas and Amelia speaking in hushed tones together coming out of an on-call room, and incorrectly believes they're sleeping together. The truth? Aunt Amelia was trying to make sure Lucas had a place to sleep and food to eat! But Lucas doesn't want his coworkers to know he's related to the Shepherds, so he's keeping his mouth shut for now. That should be interesting.

The marital trouble in this episode didn't stop with Owen and Teddy. We also see Maggie and Winston at odds, as Maggie depends too much on Winston to basically act as her resident during the time when they didn't have a class of residents. Because of this, his own surgeries are constantly getting pushed around, his assistants are being poached. Winston is fed up. The thing is, in contrast to Teddy and Owen's over the top snark and bickering, Maggie and Winston feel like a realistic married couple, navigating the challenges of working together. They resolve it by the end of the episode, Maggie explaining herself but also admitting wrongdoing. I remember when Maggie and Jackson dated, and two characters who I had otherwise quite enjoyed, became insufferable to me. I'm so glad Maggie and Winston don't make me feel that way. I rather enjoy their relationship!

I'm sure there are other notable developments that I'm missing, but that happens all the time with a show as stuffed full of characters as this one is! That's where I'll leave off for now!

8/10