#and i usually don't really care for base
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緑黄色社会 (Ryokuoushoku Shakai) - sabotage
#ryokuoushoku shakai#sabotage#japanese#rock#music#i know i posted this before#even a live version#but this song has recently climbed it's way all the way to my most popular track in my phone's player#which is a spectacularly contested spot#also the bassist is ruining my life#he is so cool#and i usually don't really care for base#but they have the big bad wolf as a singer#(lung volume wise)#(except she would blow that brick house away as well without even thinking about it)#and mephistos sister as a pianist#so i guess it makes sense that he's that good as well#not to shit on the guitarrist#but i haven't heard a super guitar intense song by them yet#but i guess that's just a matter of time#Youtube
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when you want to break a chain, you find the weakest link
#fallen london#flmp#mp#love that they put that in bold the way warnings and instructions usually are#finished discordance run two#neither of my other characters should do it based on their loyalties but the temptation is real#i don't really care about the LoN but i am a discordance fan anyway
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robot,,, bf,,, my beloved,,,
#im sooooooooo normal about him really#i definitely have not been yapping about him 24/7 for the last. 4 days#every time he shows up: omg Blitzy haiiiiii <333#i have to watermark it but i do have cute art of him with my s/i who i also made very quickly#getting me into this was a bad idea i love everything about the franchise so far#cool ass robots being goofy as shit? i must make this my personality this is For Me#anyway. yeah hi new f/o. again. why is this happening to me. again.#ficto tag#proship selfship#it's a rat room blitz!#ship tag based on the first song i wanted to put on the playlist#it was a silly thought but it's stuck#maybe ill think of something better but i do like it in the meantime#ratkingrambles#i don't care that the fandom is pissed about his bumblebee appearance i was in love with that mask the minute i saw him#and then i got his tfa intro and i was cooked#look at him. he's checking all my usual f/o boxes. damn it.
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I dual-boot Windows 11, mainly for gaming, but it has another purpose—to keep bad naughty applications quarantined away from the lovely desktop I've spent so much time customizing.
I tried out Wine+Lutris+Steam again yesterday and a lot of games just work right away! But a lot don't, and debugging is very hard. And even when they do, the Steam client is just every pet peeve I have put into one program. It puts a .steam directory in my $HOME; it refuses to use my native window borders; worst, it has a fake close button that only minimizes it.
I might consider replacing Windows with a second Linux install, hopefully something that rarely updates and works well with drivers. But for now... meh.
#i used to like windows#a lot of my software preferences are based on having always preferred windows to mac#even now i usually don't hate it but it's gotten difficult esp. with the nonsense you have to do to get a local account#on windows (and also android) i just kind of don't care about customization#and having an OS where i don't care is really a good thing#thoughts#linuxposting
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i hate astrology stuff too but i think this show sometimes misses that the belief systems of different planets aren't usually the problem. the governments based on belief systems are.
#TO tag#just all the... 'you guys are an advanced civilization you cant possibly believe this stuff!!!!!!1!1!' talk#it isn't about belief it is clearly a method of scapegoating and false order Because of it being a governmental tool#if it were just individuals finding meaning in it harmlessly then... the advance civ thing doesn't contradict that#it's stupid to base an entire gov system off of it without evidence but it's not stupid for individuals to find meaning in spirituality#that argument abt being advanced is meant to try getting through to those people because it's a dire situation but#it was a similar thing last episode with trying to get through to teleya#where... again! dire circumstances! and careful wording about how usually when species to go space they become less rigid#in a species-centric religion but instead the krill went into it harder#and that was moreover about the xenophobia issues than religion#i don't think the show has so far dismissed the importance of belief outright#BUT it keeps going right up to the edge and even as someone who isn't religious i am gritting my teeth waiting for#some church of the flying spaghetti monster reddit atheist bro takes#and i just really hope it keeps giving plausible deniability of being on the other side of that#anyway maybe none of this matters bc the belief systems in question are methods of categorization and superiority and hierarchy#based on things that cannot be helped like species or birthdate and that's unfair and clearly results in fucked up stuff#and can very much be harmful on that individual level too#i just wonder if this show has ever done belief systems in a positive light in conjunction with showing how they can be harmful#anyway. something about ed playign god here with the star thing. i dont have the braincells to think more on this.
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also it's something (better) like, the exercise of deliberately [art imitates life imitates art] holding up Billions to My IRL Things Perspective and going like whaaat would i want for winston. first answer is you want any character to not have been within the scope of the show in the first place, and to exit it since they are. and you kind of get that in the accidental reward in banishing winston, since like in the end it's just that the show doesn't care about him existing at that point But like it's winston sitting there quietly as everyone leaves & turns out the lights & Then he can leave too; others have peaced out & nobody remembers he exists so Now he can go off & do whatever.
but like in true form i think they definitely accidentally baked in another divine reward for winston in that, like, the way he's kept around as fodder for these fun little [pov: enjoy abusing this guy] asides with him, where it Just So Happens that he's autistic as something they're unaware of but is completely relevant to the expectation we understand him to be inferior(tm), it Just So Happens that he's also ""bad"" at not ""causing"" abuse to be turned on him. he's ""bad"" at staying in line. like well yes Yes that's what i want for him. just like In Real Life it's like yeah Ideally i'd want people to be able to extricate themselves from where they're trapped in power structures & i'd want them to have the perspective about it of understanding they're not Inferior / i.e. they are as much a person as anyone else and they're not corrupting everything good / i.e. it wasn't them Bringing It Upon Themselves and it's not them being Destructive by toppling a jenga tower of a hierarchy that happened to be pressing down on them. and winston is the kind of [the ruinerrrrrr] who is Turned On exactly because he keeps acting like someone who's on the verge of breaking out of the [being in line] someone demands of him as autist, employee, whatever other supposed manifestations of [inferior]
like in the 5 second stretches in which winston's allowed to speak before retaliation, it's because he's like "matter of factly" delivering whatever Information that's useful for another plotline. then he Brings It Upon Himself by making people aware that he's Also existing in his own right as a person rather than what they think serves their own deal / what they want from him at all times, perhaps by expressing his personality (didn't appeal to them! so it was Wrong) or not b/c of anything in particular said or done at present, just b/c people have a constant / accumulating contempt for him so their being in the same room as him & able to see & hear him is already dangerous. the [we're just seeing Any Abusive Dynamic in action] continuing apace.
and it's like, well, right there. he's written as acting like someone who doesn't blame himself for how he's treated, which billions frames as being Rude & Mean, and so too does everyone's abusers lmfao like and that these are his moments that are written to be Bringing It Upon Himself. and it's like hell yeah he doesn't blame himself. hell yeah that his self-esteem can manifest as anger at all. hell yeah that he keeps expressing himself with personality & confidence & doesn't even disguise his having been hurt, & it's this [his ass is Not grey rocking] that billions frames as both him "causing" his abuse & making that abuse "successful" lol, wrow just like real life!! and when like speaking of real life yeah it's not "bad" that people Do engage in strategies to mitigate & survive, including things like blaming themselves or being too "boring" to be anything but a non dialogued background character b/c that's all that goes unpunished, it's bad b/c it's done to them at all, not [ohh they're doing it to themselvesss] and like i'm asking myself like Ideally. what do i want Ideally. and i'd want winston to know that it's being Done To Him & i'd want him to find as much room for his personhood & autonomy as possible. and that's basically how he's written anyways, and billions hates that like You See this is why he deserves it this is why he's doing it to himself. and i'm like my god if that's not Inspiration for like "so what if people don't find you Personally Likable" and not preemptively holding back all personality or anything that'd draw attention as if you exist as a person in your own right & not something that only either gets in the way of or serves their wants of a Real person (someone with more power) like hell yeah you have him out here doing it =']
another fun addendum is like, billions isn't getting into it much b/c it doesn't seem to care much about "what if some people were peers & seem to have a genuine, recipcrocal relationship?" but that it just so happened to be like "oh tuk as the next closest loser who deserves it might be nice to winston" while it's framing winston as the "worse" Loser as being....unconditionally supportive of tuk. while the one downside of billions Also giving bentuk as much as it is is that it also inevitably has that shadow of "but ben is Superior to tuk" and like that it's correct that everyone encourages tuk to Stop Bringing It Upon Himself and start being less of a loser; it's wrong for winston to be like hey let's go have a foursome. like yeah probably don't make a list of the women you work with you'd be dtf but it's not like i'm convinced "ah billions and it's strong anti misogyny stance like" roflmao and billions is Not reflecting on "the downsides of unconditional support?" there when winston was beaten up for criticising taylor earlier like we WILL take his ideas while looting his [beaten unconscious] body there but he WAS wrong to express them as though he's BETTER than taylor!!! mafee's beautiful show of loyalty in kicking his ass even when he might agree with the argument and then benefit when it's adopted by taylor anyways! so it's as usual actually purely based on hierarchy & who gets to be in charge of people. it's correct for ben to be in charge of tuk, unless he has to step aside for that bizarre dead-end subplot about how it's tuk's fault if he's treated badly, b/c it's really his own Failure to have Confidence to know he has good ideas [raising our voice to deliver this message over the sound of breaking desks and chairs and computer monitors over winston because he had the confidence to act like he deserved to talk to someone and because he knows his ideas efforts & results are good & valuable around there] like. and isn't it sooo fucked up to talk about who you're dtf in the episode that has it be neutral if your boss is dtf & lets you know but is nice about it (and you're already Correctly tending to their ego, which you're responsible for!) like hey no possible problem! it's not even so much of a problem for a boss man to have the sex they're entitled to & be rude about their leveraging their power in that acquisition that it Stays a problem into the next season. ew, winston is Known (Inferred) Dtf??? we'll use it to exploit His vulnerability, exacerbate it, & punish him further for good measure in another episode that just revels in abuse & violation with a sexual aspect once again, but like, hey tuk don't do that, winston's such a Bad Influence for being like, shrug, kneejerk intervening with the Good Friendship where the One In Charge leaps in & Tells tuk the Correct thing to do. obviously there's also the tragedy that billions will Never let winston push back against Real Winners like rian or taylor in A Way That Matters (actually gets in their way at all) lol like. one thing that would have really been fun, winston should've literal kneejerk started physically fighting wags in either pertinent scene in 7x03 for real 110%. i wouldn't be like Gasp Violence Is Never The Answer if he just hit someone to hit them b/c fuck you. or broke anything on his way out etc etc. billions would Never let him. which is the other side of the same coin of [why he should get to]
tl;dr how great that winston's being "out of line" means he's basically always noticeably flouting & rebelling against the [He Deserves Abuse] agenda lol. that IS what i want. his being "beyond hope" like ohhh he's sooo stupid he doesn't realize how much he has the bad tastes & wrong interests & annoying personality He Will Always Be This Way like hell yeah!!! billions like oh no winston's personhood will never stay tamped down & locked away such that some godawful person tolerates keeping him in their inventory :( ohhh the ABA will never work :( that's right!!!!!!!!!! although they're not sad about it because it's about relishing the promise there will always be True Inferiors you can enjoy abusing with your righteous power over, but like well you wrote him escaping anyways even while dragging other "better" characters into standing around to serve axe's need for more than 1.8 employees and [crickets, reverberating cough, sneaker scuff] like. another ""wrong"" thing for winston to do, another thing for him to not "deserve," which is itself godawful actually lol like lord what it "rewards" its Good, Deserving characters with, no thanks. meanwhile winston's punishment is that he's autistic and """bad""" at being abused like lmfao good for him, fantastic for him, just what i want
#winston billions#a series that did inadvertently power up the stances of someone who actually is Not a fan of ableism; abuse; authoritarianism; and cetera#real winston billions fans might also get written off the series into the ether....but hey. the power up#the ''i saw the autistic character. i saw the tour de force'' was there & it mattered#myself marked glad to be A Ruinerrrrr; to like be present where other people might be aware & even say & do things & [my personality]#throw it back to the last post like my experience going hahaha >:) but you made one mistake. decade old minivan in my name#enough to Get Outta There....but that naturally if it Wasn't that Would be an avenue of punishing / reeling people back in#hey you Stole this from me. hey winston that's Stolen Time and stolen data who give a shit. it's the principle of [we own winston]#my experience also indeed getting ''''worse'''' at being abused lmao i.e. more conflict & resentment as i was increasingly aware i didn't#deserve it. no thanks to much of anything i learned in; say; interacting with others as an autistic person lmao. hmm!#meanwhile even if exploring like Winston Having Fun Being Himself it's like one thing is just. never having the Site of that be like#first & foremost An Romance lol. like even if it's like sure someone could interpret this as romantic that's like; an extra thing#and it's not The Guideline like; not thinking that for winston to be okay he Needs to get on the soulmate track#(billions does think that lol) and like. while billions says winston Has dated (i do think they meant to imply Multiple Times in 5x05#i just think we see that they usually don't care oh so much abt continuity; certainly not across the board) & that he has a crush#like then uhh yeah sure it's like. well i can readily extrapolate then that he's had abusive dating relationships.#billions does Not put forth that someone treating winston Well is where he gets the bulletproof confidence or anything lol#just cursed like again i'm not. i'm not gonna accept [wild you dropped steph into our Visuals as like 1 Confirmed Winston Ex]#but it's also like well then any Depiction would be The Perspective....not like. the abuse currently happening & in any way that is meant#to be ''''obvious'''' & ''''convincing'''' to someone w/no idea what it looks like anyways. vs the mundane ordinary parts that speak to it#or just the ways that experience & concomitant perspective could manifest outside of it even with No look inside it#running into issues like [good thing riawin didn't even hook up or that'd be More vulnerability in an abusive relationship already]#but what if they did & Montage Of Malaise? well to even brush up against inevitable more ''blatant'' things would then either be like#well immediately move Away from that then. before or after but Exit the [current] situation. Or it'd be like. rian has to Reconsider#but a) the character absolutely does not & based on everything will not. & b) if she actually Does; e.g. in a fic. well it's about her now#but i can think of ''yeah maybe winstuk fic that is also framed with bentuk b/c it's not really about Romance & if it's like sure then why#Not presume winston has experiences w/abuse & violation aplenty b/c that's the full context for the character lol it's then still like#and here's little details in which that could Manifest that would just be [??] or unnoticed to others anyways. just like real life!!''
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Every time the topic of Vegetta and marriage comes up I am forced to see misinformation or even flat out lies about Vegetta's past wedding experience and his relationship with Rubius and I just
#i talk#qsmp talk#IM TIREDDDDDDDDDDDD#For the love of god can you talk about this subject without doing the worst character analysis I've ever seen#Was his past wedding experience bad? yes#Does that somehow mean Rubius was abusive and they hate each other? NO#People don't need to villainize Rubius just to justify their ship dear GOD#I really don't care about fandom opinions usually but this one drives me up the frickin wall#Listen man I love Rubius and Vegetta to death and seeing people purposefully misinterpret them#and their past relationship for the sake of a ship#is just so exhausting#I don't care about people talking about the potential for marriage or how disastrous the last ones were#it's SOLELY when the interpretations are based on second or third hand information#or the intentionally is intentionally made in bad-faith#that I get :///#A few Spanish mutuals on Twitter wrote some very long threads with helpful information detailing events from past weddings#because they were also tired of people not knowing the details#and they got SO much hate for it from people who were specifically spreading the bad information to new fans#Like. why is a block game ship a hill you're willing to die on#It's so silly when you take a step back and think about it but also I'm so tired
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Listen I get this may be too topical of a game rec for some people rn, and so valid, but if anyone likes survival games and hasn't tried This War of Mine yet, it's only a couple bucks on steam and humble bundle right now.
#tbh this game will literally never cease to be topical but I also understand why that means it's not for everyone tbh#but yeah i've been playing it... way more then I'd care to admit this week#if you're a project zomboid fan it'll probably be right up your alley btw but yeah#also tbh it's not bad to mod way easier then some other games i've modded in the past#wish some stuff didn't have to be a “modify core game files” thing though because :/ model swaps mods would be fun okay#i wish it was on sale on gog rn too but um hey it's on gog too btw guys#anyway end of game rec hour with Katie I usually don't post this kinda thing but I think some of y'all would really like this#based off of the game I see on my dash okay
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j'isu is absolutely not above murder. she wasn't a very good person for a long time && still struggles with it at times especially when her emotions become high, she can have a tendency to lean toward acts of vengeance, certainly when those she cares for closely are at stake. she can have a strong sense of justice, wanting to make things right at any cost at points. she also tends to lean into a lot of vices because coping isn't exactly her strongest ability, she takes everything she's ever gone through && shoves it deep down && hides everything from everyone, even who she really is or was before.
she's terrified of anyone finding out about her past, because she doesn't think anyone will truly accept her for who she is or was before && would shun her immediately.
though it's also exactly why she has a strong belief in the fact anyone can change && become better; 'what we make of a new path in life can live on despite the pain we wrought before; though our pasts are ingrained in us && should be carried as a stain && reminder of who we were && who we should strive to never become again in the future'.
#[ i feel like most times people see pink n think superficial one dimension or maybe its why theres never much interest in her im not sure ]#[ but there's a lot to her that i don't get to explore often since no one really cares for it bhdwawskmd ]#[ thats why putting her with 'villains' kinda makes her shine more n she can relate to people like urianger who end up on that deceiving#path time n time again ]#[ she has killed n will kill again both because its what is right but also for the reasons of vengeance she is light but she is 'human' ]#[ i like the themes of flawed hero who is absolutely human in nature n concept n also the themes of#life being absolutely horrid but oh they chose goodness they chose to make sure others do not suffer as they have ]#[ n those are fundamentally what shes based on ]#━━ ❥ headcanons »#[ i dont do hcs much cause its just me shouting into the void n usually just 'ah pink so not deep' ]
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i will never not find it hilarious that they completely forgot to animate patty at the very end of the final cutscene in the last three frames of the whole group
and the dub didn't even give her voiced lines when everyone was shouting they so the localization forgot about her too
#GTF Vesperia Things#the loc also changed her line from “it stopped?” to “it's over?” which is awkward#bc i'm pretty sure she was referring to the blastia+spirit's power not working as they intended#i know the DE loc was really wonky and they rly just went what's a consistency tho#but it's actually very jarring for me to play the DE version bc the loc was actually relatively on point originally#and then all the additions and changes are super awkward in the loc#like flynn saying good luck out there to yuri if you sleep at the inn at aurnion... even tho he's literally in the party#you can tell they didn't actually check the original script for accuracy/consistency AT ALL#just really feels like they didn't care much about it ultimately and just shoved it out#the remake is what i have access to rn but like... the original was def better and like#as someone who did play the original numerous times it's so blatantly obvious where they changed/added stuff#esp since patty's lines outside of anything immediately directed at her own story#were almost entirely throwaway lines they stuck in there just to give her lines to make her more present#i'd say about half of flynn's added lines if not more for anything he wasn't originally part of were similar#like anything that was exactly the same except they stuck in a few extra lines for those two#and like... i love flynn but imo the DE version really didn't do him that much more justice (n-no pun intended)#and like it doesn't matter that they did plan patty originally bc ultimately she got cut#which meant making the entire story/plot without her; so adding her back in LATER is like... why did you fucking bother removing her then#they ended up having to forcefully stick her back in anyway and whatever she would've had in the first place#prob would've been better/integrated better into the story than trying to squeeze in lines wherever possible#and I say that bc her lines (and a chunk of flynn's) don't actually change anything. chars will respond the same with or without their line#like... hearts r did really great in integrating a new char into the main party#even if i usually do NOT like additions to the main cast in remakes and is usually why i don't want remakes in the first place for tales#and then you've got innocence r which just butchered everything with its additions#and vespy is right in the middle as like... why bother (for money i know but still)#also tho honestly with how little flynn is even actually playable it's still a big why bother for me#bc yeah i do love having him there and i do love the sidequest stuff with him#but the biggest difference between hearts r and the vespy remake is that they didn't really... remake it#they just stuck new things into existing unchanged content and added a little bit more and reused the base game#if the tag count is still thirty im out of tags lol i just have a lot of Feelings abt this remake
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And please...Gege had stated long ago that JJK won't be a happy ending for all. Even Yuuji, as the mc, is not guaranteed to live. If you can't accept that then perhaps think again before starting it. You can dislike how the story goes or the characters, but throwing hate or insulting the mangaka directly by using his name, questioning his ability of doing his professional job he has done for years, on social media which are public places, are honestly such immature acts and reflect your own lack of manner, reading comprehension, personality, or even mental capacity.
Funny cz nobody asked you, Gege-haters, to keep reading the manga or following the leaks (if you don't even read the manga or just watch the anime) he puts effort every week to publish. People really think that creating original story with abundant unique characters and drawing them on weekly deadline-paced and selling them in shonen jump for years and even be one of the best-selling mangas worldwide is easy?? Sad that people are so quick to defend when there are fan-based creators getting hate but not when it's the original creator themselves. If you feel so great that you think you can write the storyboard better than the original creator than by all means write your own story or draw your own manga and see if you can sell more than 90 million copies worldwide like how Gege does (excluding the online chapters). Most of them don't even give constructive criticisms. Just plain (sometimes veiled) insults or underestimating comments so I suspect this also has to do with how they don't actually understand the story itself.
#i just dont understand how ppl cud publicly like the characters Gege made at the same time publicly insulting the creator#myb thats what happen when they only like the character as far as they can fantasize about them#doesnt care abt how the story is written or how the character is created to fulfill their role in the narrative as long as they can keep#fangirling and fanboying about them even at the cost of the characters being ooc af but myb that's all they seek so it's not my business#im glad im on tumblr so i can easily curate what i see but if i see one it's instant block for me#this is why im so embarrassed being part of the eng-based fandom for big fandoms sometimes#im sorry for my followers who have nothing to do with this and have to see me ranting like this 🙏#im usually not like this but some types of ppl really grate on my nerves#i dislike ingrates and those who can't appreciate others' effort esp if they also lack reading comprehension skill#also those who don't even read the manga but following the trend of gege-hating like tf do you realize just how ridiculous that sounds?lmao#such hypocrites all of em
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#running face first straight into every single rejection sensitive wall atm and it's so frustrating#like. can we just not do this rn brain? I'm too tired to deal with this on top of everything else#all it does is make me alienate myself from people I care about and make me feel like shit afterwards#and it doesn't fix any of the underlying issues either. (like. I've been upset about ppl not doing what I do)#(as in read all of my fic like I try to read all my friends' fic usually. but like.. not everyone can and not everyone wants to)#(but it's one of those irrational things of 'if they cared about me wouldn't they also try' even tho that's not a fair ask)#(and like.. most people don't read random fic for fandoms they're not even in so this is entirely stupid to be upset about)#(but here we are anyway)#just.. me. raw to the very nerve and too tired to fix anything that might help alleviate it#I just want to feel normal again. and like I have control over my emotional state#but between 'dude fucked up bc of his borderline being triggered by grief and letting out all his frustrations on me for weeks'#and 'other dude grieving but not processing and not even taking a break to figure out where he's at emotionally..#..therefore dropping all of his unprocessed baggage and his part of the group work right on top of me' I'm just having a heck of a month#and idk. it would have been nice to talk to sb about my fic even if it's older now and not the best perhaps#(doesn't help when everybody you know writes really great fic and you're just outside the door scribbling some ideas into the sand)#idk. usually I do better in disconnecting self-worth and accomplishments and stop myself before the comparisons with others start#but rn it's all too much and I'm drained and exhausted and nothing feels good or helps much at all.#anyway.#it is what is I guess. and what it is is fucked and I doubt it's gonna change anytime soon.#that's not me being unrealistic or depression talking. it's based on how things have progressed thus far#there's another year and a half of this kind of stress which will likely get worse when our group grows from 18 to 31 in October#and then I'd have to start working proper again which I haven't in over two years bc of all the rehabilitation I've been going through#and it's terrifying and I'm already exhausted and worn down and worn out and I just don't know how normal is ever gonna be my life again
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thing ab old ocs and growing is that i still have an attachment 2 them.... yes my bnha ocs were written badly bc i was 11/12 but listen. near and dear .....
#AKANE AND SHISEN AND SORA MY FAN FAVE LESBIANS <- more like my middle school friends fave#they all have gfs that's so based of me#yes i have a gay boy. hes emo.#and a nb person. jona. theyre mean. 💕☝🏼 as they should b#akane and shisen should hang out afctyally#shimo & sora too#jona is a lone wolf they don't care ab anyone. usually shisen too but she went soft#i literally don't really remember the schematics of their quirks just the basic ideas . u could ask tho
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Well Knee Socks are back I guess. Which - sure, fun.
But guess what - they've taken Do Me a Favour's spot
I'm still so very bitter and scared and sad for TBHC, most of all. But now more of the same.
I do enjoy AM as an album - I do. But I don't think switching up non-AM songs for even more AM songs should be allowed 😪 All the other albums deserve so much better.
Just... AM is a great album. I get it's what most casual fans listen to. But I hate the level of trying to appeal to just that one specific group of fans.
#someone please explain the grasp that Snap out of it has in this man--#yes it's a fun song I guess#yeah... the crowd will have fun#(yes I will also be having a blast when they olay it)#- but like... Over TBHC? Over so many other fun songs that have been neglected for ages? 😭#you know what would be a fun swap for Snap?#Suck It and See!#Mardy Bum!#not to mention the songs you just... orphaned but who deserve the live spotlight 🥲#(my dream-live-songs like Ultracheese and Star Treatment and Schwartz and Love is a Laserquest and Piledriver Waltz and Jeweller's hand#and and and... so many more)#ugh#this is just really sad. like at least give me TBHC back Alex. it's the least you can dooo#and listen - I get that if statistically your fan base loves a certain album more it makes sense to give it more attention#but this... it's too much#I've actually never been a concert-attendee specifically because I'm usually quite a casual fan of musicians -#i know a few songs / an album or two tops#and so I dont feel like a concert is my space. nor is it worth the ticket price to go for just a couple of songs#maybe that's why I'm mad that when I'm finally a more well informed fan of someone and their discography -#the a band itself is still jist focusing in one album and therefore the fans who don't care enough to go and get to know the rest#doesn't deel fair to those of us who do care...you know?#but sorry if I'm coming across as a bitter gatekeeper. Not my intention. just... well I suppose bitter is a good word#Arctic Monkeys#my posts#or rather#bitter rants#setlist drama
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Lore ideas for Terec and Ceret's Jedi Master:
Her name is something like Tar'yn Jenn (spelling possibly altered to fit her species, but I'm set on Jenn being one of her names and likely her surname).
At least for now, she's the same species as Kh'ymm.
Assuming this doesn't get retconned, she's fairly old for her species, though not frail at the time she takes Terec and Ceret on as Padawans.
She dies somewhere between Terec and Ceret's Knighting and the start of Phase I, likely of natural causes.
My initial gut reaction is that she's a good negotiator, but given Terec and Ceret's bladework, the fact that they wear fairly heavy field robes (and even armor) seemingly before the Nihil became a concern (and given Ceret's tendency to draw a blade faster than a lot of other Jedi), I want to factor into who that might make her as a person and teacher as well.
Very traditionally prim and proper/straight-laced as a means of regulating both her emotions and those of her Padawans.
#star dorks#oc tag#light and life#there's! emotions swirling around her#I don't think Terec and Ceret hated her or disliked her by any means#but usually Jedi bring up their old Masters in passing esp younger Knights#those two do not#the death is a partial way around that#I also think that. for better or for worse she tried to set high standards for their behavior and performance#both are clearly very skilled jedi and I think she was a large part of nurturing that#but I also don't think she really had them socialize much outside a strictly mission-based context#debating on if she's easily able to tell who's who or if she views them more as an entity#leaning toward the former#idk. she's a crossroads of a lot of things that makes jedi masters good and bad.#but ultimately she cared very deeply about her padawans and wanted them to succeed#and Terec and Ceret cared about her too. and likely understand her perspective at some point
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YOU STILL LIKE IT THOUGH
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GENRE: Fluff, crack fic ish?
PAIRING: Choi su-bong/thanos x preg!fem!reader
FEAT: Nam gyu as the supportive bestie (that he never rlly was)
A/N: this fic i based of a request from anon !! Tbh i changed ALOT of the request (haha- sorry 😞) because I felt like it was a little repetitive and idk i just can't write rlly emotional scenes with Thanos for some reason (??) ALSO I feel like there are parts where Thanos seems ooc? Idk.. i wrote this instead of studying in the span of 30 mins
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/6af5c628719c1a851e43e1652238c80d/449a5e0067e5d417-59/s540x810/8ed4034cf26012e3a5c68d0d321d915e0b5d905e.jpg)
"Whoo!" You hear Thanos shout on the top of his voice while he high fives nam gyu as they both jump up and down as if they were children in elementary school after winning a play ground game
You manage your groan, suppressing it while you stare at them from afar, of course that crazy fucker managed to pass through the first game.
You hated to admit it, but a part of you was relieved,
You always had a thing for psycho guys, and your ex boyfriend? The one with the brightly dyed hair who was now doing some weird dance seemed to proudly embody every part of that sentiment.
You carefully watch from afar, not wanting to catch his eyes, your hand unknowingly lay over your stomach while you move uncomfortably in the bunk bed
Fuck, your feeling dizzy all over again
You hear a thud against your bed post, you look up slowly, your eyes slightly squinting to see the purple haired boy with a usual frown on his face
"Hey" his eyebrows raise "are you okay"
"I thought I told you to get lost earlier"
Your mood swings weren't really helping either
"Geez woman" thanos tchs but sits beside you in your bed anyways "im just trying to help" grumbling under his breath but the cautious expression in his face saied otherwise
"I came here to brag about how amazing i usually am but seeing you like this is just killing the vibe yknow"
he makes a hand gesture in the air, leaning face closer in an attempt to make you smile which does not go wasted as the smile you tried to supress escaped your face
"Fuck off you loser" your still kneeling, your hands over your knees and your face hiding behind your knees but he hears the smile in your voice anyways.
He wouldn't want to admit it, but he was relieved
He always had a thing for girls with pretty voices and you? The girl right next to him had to have one of the prettiest voices he had ever heard. Ofcourse who would better know than a rapper like himself?
"I thought I told you to stick close to me, instead you leech to that crazy old man" thanos says as he points towards gi hun who sat far away in the opposite side
You immediately slap his hand, causing him to wince while retracing it back, rubbing it softly
"How many times will I tell you! You shouldn't point your hands at strangers especially to people who are older" you scold him rather loudly causing him to wince even more
"Agh" thanos ruffles his neon hair while complaining "why don't you shout louder so that everyone will hear and laugh at me?"
You resist the urge to roll your eyes upon his childish manners, he really didn't change
Thanos suddenly bangs the top of the bunk with a loud sound, taking you by shock
"Oi" his voice loud and almost threatening "nam gyu" calling out the man above the bed
Immediately your taken by shock once more when a man's head pops upside down, with black oily hair falling all over his face from above the bed
"Yes Thanos?" Nam gyu quickly inquired while sparing you a quick glance which didn't go unnoticed by the scowling man next to you
"Did you hear her telling me off?" He points at nam gyu before quickly adding "careful, there's only one correct answer"
Nam gyu pauses and thinks which seems to be the wrong thing to do as it just annoys Thanos
"Whats wrong with you, tell me quickly!"
"N-no! Not at all! Infact nobody heard anything!" Nam gyu quickly says, obviously lying but this seemed to please Thanos who now held a haughty face
Wow, this is was supposedly the father of your unborn child. Shame you and your taste in weird guys
Before Thanos could open his mouth to say something, a group of pink guards enter the room with large containers
Straight away you freeze up, shrinking behind the bed while your heart hammered, fear spread across your face
Noticing your expression on your face, instinctively Thanos covers you with his back, shielding you with his arms which covered your sides while his expression, though you could not see was filled with wariness
The pink guards open the large containers they were carrying as everyone watched quietly, scared as they were unsure of what to expect, you included
The pink guard with the white circle lifts up a piece of bread and milk "lunch time" announcing in the same robotic voice like all the other guards
A sigh of relief escapes your mouth as your shoulders relax, unlike you Thanos still shields you, covering your face with his back
You hit him with a thud on the back of his head
"What the hell man" thanos turns around, his eyes glaring at you
"Stop trying to act like a hero you shameless prick" you frown even though his actions did leave you with a warm feeling in your heart
"Your acting so protective after all the stunt you pulled before we broke up" you continue "seeing you act all so protective is just pissing me off even more"
Thanos throws his head back, groaning "give me a break woman. You know I was going through a hard time"
"Bullshit" your fold your arms, as if it was act to protect yourself, and the unborn baby in your stomach.
The poor thing was only 2 months old
The both of you hear nam gyu cough from above the bed, forgetting that he was there in the first place
Again Thanos bangs the top of the bunk, causing you to give him a look
"Stop doing that" you scold him
"doing what?" Thanos raises his eyebrow before banging the top of the bunk again while sticking his tongue at you
Nam gyu pops back down again, upside down, the sight would have been hilarious only if you weren't experiencing the pain in your stomach and the sight of the man sitting beside you
"Go get lunch for me and my girl" thanos tilts his head towards you while avoiding your eyecontact while you tell yourself not to think about the fact that he still referred to you as 'his girl'
"go fast what are you still doing here" thanks reprimanded nam gyu
Nam gyu awkwardly stood unsure of what to say "but it's just one bread and one milk per person"
"Then give her yours" thanos said simply "and go steal someone's lunch for me"
"Then what about for me?" Nam gyu asked dumbfounded which caused Thanos to pause and think for a while
"That's not my fucking problem man- now go" he pushes him away, leaving you with a heavy sigh
"I don't want to eat"
"Don't talk bullshit" thanos eyes you "you think i'm gonna let you starve? I never did, and i wont be starting now"
Again with the whole protective boyfriend act, fuck, why did it make your heart race a little?
"Your still such an asshole, you didnt change a bit" you huffed as you leaned behind, resting your back against the wall
"Well you changed" thanos says which quirks your curiosity
"How so?'
"I don't know" he shrugs "something is different. Something happened, i can't exactly ppint my fi ger at it though"
Your eyes dart away from his while your breathing started to fasten slightly
"Oh yea? How so?" You ask, your voice slightly higher than it was which Thanos picks up immediately
"Ohoho" he grins "did I get it right? Did you get something done?" He glances you up and down which leads you to hitting him
"Ow- i was just joking, you still take everything so seriously" he grumbled holding your hand from hitting him "I wish that part had changed'
Your other hand comes swinging which he again grabs softly
"jokingg" he says in a sing song voice before letting both your arms go leaving you with a scowl and him with a satisfied smirk in his face
"Asshole" you mutter which stretches his smirk even more
"You still like it though"
You almost swear you heard a hint of vulnerability in his tone, prompting you to glance at him quickly just to catch him already looking at you
"So? Aren't you gonna ask me what has changed?" You ask slowly, in your head trying to process whether your doing the right thing or not,
You first found out you were pregnant with your baby right after you and Thanos broke up.
The following days, whenever you went to pay him a visit, he was always missing, causing you to believe maybe it was better for him not to know. And then you suddenly meet him for the first time after your breakup during the squid games
The timing was almost comical
"Why?" Thanos continued still with an amused face "you still seem the same on the inside"
Your hand immediately goes to your stomach, slowly tracing along it from above the green track jacket which everyone wore
"Don't tell me your sick or something" thanos asks with his voice slightly raised as he notices your action "fuck are you?"
His eyes slightly widens as he frowns "hey" he snaps his finger upon your zoning out "are you sick?"
"Hm?" You ask confused
"What the fuck" he swears under his breath with a anxious expression on his face while his hand runs through his finger "is that why your here? To win some money for your treatment?"
"Su Bong its not like that-" All your attempts of correcting him seemed to be futile as he sweared loudly, getting out of the bed
"Shit shit shit!" He grabs his head while he paced around the floor, a sight you had seen a few times over the span of your relationship
"ofcourse that's why your here, you would only be here for a sensible reason"
"Oh, su bong" you attempt to appeal to him, reaching your hand out, pulling his closer towards you while he hands were still over his head, eyes lowered
"Fuck baby I'm so sorry" he breathed out "shit i never should have left, i thought" he paused "I thought I'd win some money and get you back, give you the life you really deserve but"
You watch his dazed expression while he rambled, you bit you underlip, hesitant of whether to tell him the truth still
"Fuck, i didn't even know that, i didn't even know you were sick-"
Before he could continue again you grab his face , forcing him to look at your face
"I'm not sick, that's not why im here"
Thanos breathed heavily, everything felt so real suddenly, he felt his cross necklace strapped around his neck, his fingers itching to pop a pill in his mouth to sooth his nerves
"I'm not sick" you shake your head as you lean your forehead against his "su-bong"
You can still feel his strained breaths and darting eyes
"I'm pregnant"
And it all stopped,
You held your breath, afraid of what would happen if you let go, your could heart your heartbeat from your ears, feel the realisation setting inside thanos,
You were scared. Scared of how he would react
He breaks away first, slowly and gently. Staring at you with no expression in his face,
"And it's yours" you rapidly feel the need to add, taken back by his silence which didn't not suit him "and i know having a kid was never in your plan, and i know things are over between us but-"
Your body is wrapped by his arms and his face nestles in your neck, pulling your deeper in his embrace
"Holy shit" thanos whispers in your ear, you can hear the giddiness radiating off his voice "im a dad"
"Yea you are" you laugh a little as you say "your a dad"
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"I never got the chance to"
Thanos furrows his eyebrows but doesn't press any more "will you let me be our baby's dad?" He ask
"You know I grew up without a dad, this kid doesn't deserve that" he pokes your stomach with a soft grin which looked slightly odd against his eccentric features "I wanna be in this kids life"
You nodd softly, hearing his words
"And yours too" thanos looks up to you, grinning while he winked at you "senorita"
"You corny bastard" you laugh shaking your head
"You still like it though"
You nodd your head, with tenderness in your eyes and voice
"I do"
₊˚。⋆❆⋆。˚₊ extra scene pack !!
"Thanos!" Nam gyu came running with 3 pieces of sweet bread and 3 packets of milk "I got it! Do you know how much trouble i went to get all these-"
"Give it here " thanos grabbed all the bread and milk away "why did you take so long anyways"
Nam gyu held his hands as he pouted "I mean- i had to fight like 2 guys for bread and milk for us-"
Thanos brushed him off as he opened all the packets of bread and poked in the straw of all the milk packets
"Uhm thanos" nam gyu apprehensively called out "What are you doing?"
Thanos hands you all the bread and urges you to eat while he holds the packets of milk in his hand, ready to feed you
Thanos gestures towards you who was sitting in the bed, now wrapped in not only your jacket but his aswell "can't you see the lady is pregnant"
Nam gyu scratched his head "pregnant? With who?"
Thanos shakes his head, exaggerating his actions "dumb ass, she's pregnant with my baby ofcourse" he announced like it was the most obvious thing in the world
"Holy shit!" Nam gyu gaped his hand covering his mouth as he stares at you while you sheepishly smile at him
Thanos let out a small laugh which then slowly grew louder
"What? Why are you surprised? Ofcourse i succeeded in my first try- fuck" he kneels down in pain after being striked by you in the stomach
Nam gyu pulls a face in behalf of Thanos as he pats his back sympathetically while he whispers to you
"Don't worry. I know it probably wasnt his first try or anything- ow" nam gyu kneels on the ground after being hit in the stomach by thanos
₊˚。⋆❆⋆。˚₊
"What... what are you guys doing?" You question as you approach Thanos and nam gyu who were huddled up in a corner, in a long rather quiet conversation which seemed like an unusual activity for both of them to part take in
Both in the 'discussion' and 'quiet' part
Thanos loops his arm around your with a proud smirk on his face while urging nam gyu to announce what they were discussing
Nam gyu nodds eagerly as gets up in his two feet quickly, standing straight and tall with a loud and confident voice "we have decided the perfect name for the baby !!"
You see thanos's broad smile and nam gyu's confident voice, uneasiness settling in your stomach for whatever name they picked out
"These is the name that Thanos and i have personally given a lot of thought for and chosen after much contemplation !!"
Thanos nodded his head with a content expression while he winked at you, assuring that you'll like it
"Ahem" nam gyu clears his throat "before I announce the name that we have chosen, i would like to give recognition to the name we almost chose aswell !!"
Thanos immediately began clapping his hand loudly "waaah, I never knew you could speak so well "
This comment made nam gyu's chest fill swell with pride as he puffs out his chest a little
"I shall now, announce the first runners up, the name that almost was given to the new born baby"
nam gyu pauses which prompts Thanos to make the sound of drum rolls
"Nebula" nam gyu announces as he and thanos clap loudly.
Seeing your still figure both men urge you to claps aswell
"Nebula?" You mutter under your breath "where have i heard that name before?"
"And now, the name that has been selected over numerous selection test and discussion, the name of the baby is" nam gyu points at your stomach
"Gamora"
Thanos whoops loudly, both nam gyu and him clapping their hands in the air while you stand off handedly as it hits you
"Your naming our child after the daughter of the purple alien monster from a superhero movie?!"
#thanos squid game#squid game fanfic#squid game 2#squid game#squid game season 2#squid game x reader#squid game x you#thanos x reader#choi su bong x reader#choi su bong#su bong x reader#t.o.p x reader#t.o.p#t.o.p bigbang#thanos#nam gyu#squid game nam gyu#squid game thanos#squid game thanos x reader
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