#and i thought “what if i tell the guilt to shut up in a new way” bc for me the guilt is unproductive

[lostsyren]

Could you do.....maybe Sofia canceling a date with Rafe because her paycheck got delayed, and she feels to embarressed to go on dates in the same clothes and had plan to buy new things. She tells him that she is sick, but then he sees her at a bonfire party. He feels heartbroken thinking she lied because she is tired of him while he is head over heels, he walks off, she runs after.....ANGGSTTT <3

˚⊱🪷⊰˚ date night

{a/n: sorry for taking so long to get to my requests but I hope it was worth the wait!!}

{summary: sofia can’t make it to date night, and rafe’s not happy about it…}

꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥

“You really like that dress don’t you?” Ruthie said with a slimy smirk across her face.

Those words echoed through Sofia’s mind as she stared at her closet trying to figure out what to wear with her date with Rafe.

She hadn’t even thought twice about the clothes she wore in front of Rafe and his friends before– having enough confidence in her sense of style. Sofia had carefully curated a wardrobe from lucky thrift store finds and the occasional designer splurge when she had some of her pay check left over.

So when Ruthie had teasingly poked fun at her favourite dress (a satiny, floral slip that she adored), her cheeks flushed red with embarrassment.

“It’s so cute though, if you like that sorta thing, I can understand why you wear it so much,” Ruthie had continued, hiding her bitchy words under a guise of tooth-aching sweetness.

She hadn’t thought about it again until Rafe had asked her to come out to dinner with him a couple nights later. Sofia enthusiastically accepted– it was only when she got home to get ready, seeing her limited selection of clothes, did the stirring regret begin to overwhelm her senses and Ruthie’s words begin to engulf her brain.

She still had time to go out and buy something new, something Rafe would like (and something that would shut Ruthie up), but when she checked her account balance, she realised she didn’t have enough. After the bills for her siblings tuition and the chunk of her wage she’d spent helping her parents fix the car, she was left with nothing. And she wasn’t getting paid again till a couple weeks.

Sofia huffed exasperatedly, sinking into her bed. She hated feeling like this…feeling inferior. What if Rafe through the same thing? That he was taking her to all these flashy places, driving her around in his shiny car and she couldn’t even dress up a bit for it?

With a sinking heart, Sofia grabbed her phone to call him.

It went through instantly.

“Hey baby, everything ok?” He asked, his voice eliciting somersaults in her stomach.

“Hi Rafe, I just…I don’t think I can do dinner tonight, I’ve got this horrible headache and I think I’m just gonna go to sleep,” she fibbed, biting her lip.

“We don’t have to go out, I can pick you you up and we can just chill at mine– order from that place you like?”

Sofia didn’t like lying to him, it almost physically pained her, gnawing at her bottom lip and playing with the dead skins around her thumb. “I think I just needs some rest.”

“Ok then, get well soon yeah? And text me if you need anything alright? Goodnight Sof,” he said, disappointment toning his words.

“Night Rafe.”

She ended the call quickly, burning hot with guilt– she hated lying. Especially to her boyfriend of all people.

And now she had nothing to do for the rest of the night all because she was too embarrassed to wear the same thing twice…it was honestly so stupid. Sofia huffed and turned around in her bed.

As if sensing her impending boredom, her phone buzzed with a text from her friend, talking about a bonfire party at the Boneyard.

Sofia smiled too herself, slipping on her worn trainers and getting ready to head to the beach.

She didn’t have to worry about what to wear there.

꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥

Rafe, along with Topper, Kelce and Ruthie drove down to the Boneyard. He wasn’t supposed to tag along, but with Sofia cancelling their plans, he had nothing better to do.

As they rolled down the rocky beach in Topper’s jeep, Rafe pulled out his phone, sending Sofia a quick text.

R: Hope that headache goes away soon then maybe we can reschedule? :)

Rafe was surprised at how disappointed he felt after she said she couldn’t make it. All he could think about sitting in the back of the car, watching the Stygian waves roll onto the coast, was how much he’d rather be with her right now.

“Yo Rafe, I thought you were busy tonight?” Kelce pestered with a smirk.

Topper chuckled lowly, “oh yeah, wasn’t it date night tonight? What happened to that?”

“She wasn’t feeling too good so now I’m stuck with you idiots.” He muttered.

“Oh come on, you’ll see her again the club. I’ll make sure to ask for doubles so she’ll come by our table twice, yeah?” Ruthie goaded, twisting her body around so she could see him.

Rafe brewed with a dull anger– he always thought Ruthie was a bitch.

“Two drinks Ruthie? You sure about that? Aren’t you a lightweight?” He scoffed.

“Hey hey hey, let’s have fun tonight yeah?” Topper mediated, parking up the jeep next to the arsenal of vehicles.

The four of them hopped out, heading to the kegger, quickly getting pulled in by their kook friends, enveloped in the heady flow of gossip and conversation. Rafe just stood quietly, sipping at his third cup, enjoying the warmth of the fire on his face and salt of the air on his tongue.

His vision strayed over to the other side of the beach, where all the pogues had congregated. And that’s when he saw her. Dressed in her favourite shorts and sunset coloured hoodie– she looked gorgeous bathed in the glow of the bonfire.

Rafe felt his heart sink into the cavern of his ribcage. She lied to him.

Settling his solo cup down on to the kegger, he pulled out his phone and rang her number, watching her like a predator eyes its prey, his dilated pupils honed on to her unassuming figure.

She excused herself from her friends, walking off to a quieter area before she answered his call.

“Hey baby,” she cooed with a smile, Rafe seething in silence as he watched.

“How you feeling? Still got that headache?” He asked bluntly, his molars grinding down on each other.

“Yeah- yes, still hurts.” She said. Rafe saw her eyebrows furrow as she bit her lip furtively.

“You at home? It sounds kinda loud over the phone?”

“Yeah my siblings have the TV on,” she blatantly lied. Rafe breathed in deeply through his nose.

“Oh so you’re not at the bonfire at the boneyard?”

Rafe watched her face drop, her gaze darting around the beach as she stayed silent on the phone. She locked eyes with him from across the sand, her mouth parting slightly, lips forming a little ‘o’ shape, something that he usually found cute, but now it just irked him.

“Rafe,” she said, voice bordering a whisper.

“You fucking liar,” he hissed, before ending the call, and heading over to the cars, ready to call an Uber for himself and head home.

He tried to regulate his lurching breaths, anger beginning to flow hot through his veins, but it was hard to do when a heart rending sadness slammed into his nervous system, catching him off guard.

Sofia? A liar? No. She wasn’t like that. She wasn’t like everyone else.

His fingers struggled to order an Uber, shaking with the aftershock at seeing her deceive him with such disregard.

“Rafe! Wait please I can explain.” He whipped his head back to see Sofia approach him.

“Stop it Sofia, explain what? Huh? How you lied to me?”

A pang of regret reverberated through him when he saw her glassy, tear filled eyes, her quivering lip. Was he being too harsh? No. She was the one who was in the wrong– not him.

“I’m sorry, I just, it’s ugh it’s going to sound so stupid Rafe, but I promise I didn’t mean to hurt or lie to you.”

“What’s going to sound so stupid? Why you made an excuse to get out of being with me? You hate me that bad huh?”

“No no! Of course not. Look, Ruthie said something the other day…” she began, her cheeks red and tear stained.

“Ruthie? What the fuck does she have to do with this?” He yelled. They were on the outskirts of the party, away from the crowds and crackle of firewood.

“She was making fun of how I wear the same thing all the time, you know? And it made me get self conscious…and tonight when I was getting ready, I just got in my own head, thought you would want me dress up more, not just wear the same things every time.”

Rafe’s face contorted in confusion. She couldn’t be serious right now?

“And I can’t just buy a new dress like that, I have bills to pay and stuff so I was just feeling sorry for myself and lied because of my own stupid feelings.” Sofia’s lips began to quiver, another bout of tears quickly approaching, before she shrouded her face with her hands, muffling her soft cries.

“Sof…” he said, tone gentle and kind, feeling like shit for shouting at her. He should’ve know Sofia had a reason for lying and he should’ve know Ruthie had something to do with it.

“Ugh it was so stupid, and I feel like an idiot.” She laughed mirthlessly, as he pulled her into a hug, letting her cry against his chest.

“Baby, you know I don’t care right?”

“Yeah I know. I care though.” She mumbled against his warm embrace.

“Come on, let’s get out of here yeah?”

“Yeah, ok. I’m sorry again, I feel terrible.”

Rafe slung an easy arm around her shoulder, leading her up to road where their taxi was going to meet them, “well don’t, otherwise I’ll feel like shit for shouting at you.”

“Fine. Truce?”

Rafe chuckled softly, looking down at her with a soft smile, as she gazed up at him with her glossy eyes.

“Yeah, truce.”

꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥

A couple days later, after Sofia had slept over at his place, she woke up to the birds singing on Figure 8, a sound lost amidst the cacophony of building work and barking dogs on the Cut. She sighed contentedly, turning around in the sumptuous sheets ready to nestle up against Rafe, to find the bed empty. She hummed in dismay, forgetting it was Sunday, the day he needed to go down to the office.

Eventually, after letting her eyes flutter shut for a couple more blissful minutes, Sofia rolled out of bed, slipping on Rafe’s shirt, a habit she was getting increasingly used to.

She pattered across the hard wood floors ready to get into the shower, before her eyes snagged on something resting on the drawers. It was a cream coloured bag, one from those fancy stores in Kildare Town Centre, the straps made of black silk.

On it was a sticky note, Rafe’s familiar scratchy writing scrawled across the paper.

Now you don’t have an excuse to miss dinner with me :)

Sofia’s eyebrows quirked up in curiosity as she read the cryptic note, rifling into the bag.

Inside was maybe a dozen items of clothes, from satin dresses to cashmere shirts, all in shades of her favourite colours– blooming pinks, soft oranges, cherry reds. She adored every single one.

Her heart soared with excitement and warmth, her cheeks tinged with a rosy blush. Rafe could sometimes be so sweet it left her weak-kneed and gooey, her insides alight with joy.

A creeping sensation of guilt arose– these must’ve been expensive. Sofia noticed he’d removed all the tags off them, probably anticipating her qualms about the price. But she put it aside, ready to first try them on. She’d pay him back, she told herself, running her hands over the silken fabric.

Carefully unpacking each item, she laid them out on the bed, until her fingers skimmed the final one.

Pulling it out, she rolled her eyes with a small smile when she saw the two piece lingerie set Rafe had nestled at the bottom, comprised of black lace and gossamer.

Sofia laughed softly, as she put the piece along with the rest of her gifts– maybe she already had a way to pay him back, one that was much more fun than working double shifts at the club.

꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥 ｡𖦹꣑ৎ˚⊹ 🍥

[irusanw4]

Weirdly therapeutic art activity I did earlier today! When u get The Guilt or something similar, you can write the words "The Guilt" or that sth similar on a drawing thing of some kind (painting, collage, game notes for 3ds, etc) and then cover up the entire area with symbols of your choice. I did eyes, and rotated through the three colors on game notes for 3ds. Then, after you can't see the original words and you want to stop, use some material or color you've not used at all (like the eraser tool, newspaper, or even bright orange paint if that's more your speed) to make a big, central symbol and write "It Will Be Ok" on the lines of the symbol or filling it in, your choice.

Here's my example :3

[lymtw]

Aftercare with Toji, where after all the roughness and manhandling is over with, he can't take his eyes off of you. All he cares about is making sure that you're not in excruciating pain, yet he hasn't been able to say a word for the past five minutes. You've pressed so many tender kisses to his face and expressed that you're okay enough times to him, but he can't seem to drop the smallest, lingering coil of guilt he feels at the sight of your scuffed up body. You look like you fought off a bear and ripped octopus tentacles off your skin—simultaneously, with all the scratches, bruises, and hickeys that littered you from your jaw to your ankles.

"Quit staring," you say, bringing your knees up and crossing your arms, your hands gripping your biceps.

"Nah- baby..." he finally says, softly, like he's quickly trying to justify the gaze he had set on you. "Come here."

Toji makes quick work of crushing this wave of insecurity that threatens your peace. He knows what you just endured was not the softest experience, and that you practically let him—a man capable of showing the aggression of a pack of wolves, devour you. Really, he did not hold back at all.

You slide down the bed and pull the covers over your body, laying your head on his chest with an arm thrown over his midsection. He pulls you close with an arm wrapped around your shoulder, and kisses the top of your head. "You know I love you, right, mama?"

"Mhm," you hum. Minutes ago you would have thought those words were a cruel joke being played on you with the way he gripped onto you like he wanted it to hurt.

"Wasn't trying to hurt your feelings by staring at you like that. Just did a lot of damage, this time, and it looks like it hurts... a lot."

"I'm fine," you repeat, for the nth time. You look up at him, briefly, sparing a smile before resting your cheek on his chest again. "A hot shower will melt it all away, I promise," you mumble.

He brushes over one of the many stains he left on the side of your neck. "My little trooper," he sighs, very much relaxed by your side. "You know i'd be proud even if you told me you were hurting." He knows it'll take more than a shower to get all these new semipermanent tattoos off your pretty skin, but for the sake of not making you feel small, again, he shuts up about it.

"I know," you assure. "I just don't wanna burden you. You're probably just as tired, if not more."

"What do you need?"

You lift your head again and look at him, confusion filling out your features. "You heard me, didn't you? I can take care of myself."

"I know that, and I don't doubt it for a second, but you're really gonna reject me?" He hisses, dramatically clutching his chest. "Damn, mama, just like that?"

"Well, no. Of course not-"

"Right. Of course not," he says, with that horrible tendency he has of cutting you off when the situation benefits you. "Gonna ask you one more time, and if you don't answer, i'm just gonna do what I want for you. What do you need?"

You had to think about it for a minute, about how you wanted him to help you. Independence shone through your thoughts. Everything he could help you with, you could also do alone. You didn't want to be needy.

"Five..." He's timing you, now. "Four..." The countdown has your brain scrambling to pick something. Anything, but you're blanking, losing second by second the already little time you were gifted. "Three... it shouldn't be this hard," he teases, a smirk on his face.

"I don't know, um."

"Two... you're gonna lose the option of telling me what to do, doll."

"No- I don't know."

"One." The countdown ends. "Alright," he groans, pulling you up with him as he sits up. "Let's go."

–

Sure enough, once the lukewarm water hit your skin, you gained a burst of energy. You made the washing of your body an amusing, yet tedious task for Toji. With all your little excitement fueled dances and laughter, what should have been a ten minute session turned into a twenty minute one.

"Doll, turn around. Let me get your back," Toji says, holding back a grin at the sight of you trying to soothe the burning sensation you feel in your nose after inhaling water.

You turn your back to him, before jovially turning to face him again. "Joking, joking," you say, when you catch his lidded eyes. You quickly turn your back to him, again, with giggles slipping past your lips.

He sighs, unable to hold back the gentle curl of his lips any longer. "What am I gonna do with you?" He lathers you from the nape of your neck to your lower back, with soap. The contrast of the white foam and the darkened stains on your skin, were enough to have him thinking about what ended just a little over half an hour ago. There wasn't a spot on you that didn't have some mark of his on it. Your shoulder blades and spine were mottled with stains of his lips, and your hips had opaque fingerprints on them.

You winced and took a step forward, away from Toji's touch, successfully pulling him out of his zoned out state. "You're scrubbing the scratches too hard," you say, turning to him while running your hands over the tender skin.

"Shit," he gently pulls you back and turns your back to him again, "sorry, princess." A few soothing kisses are pressed into the strikes, enough of them to make you forget that it even stung in the first place. He makes sure his mind stays out of the gutter, at least until he's done washing you, so that he doesn't hurt you again.

After showering, you stayed in bed while Toji went to the kitchen to make some tea for you. He did this for you after every night of intimacy, to expedite the betterment of your exhausted throat. He also knows of the calming properties that ease you into slumber. He wants nothing more than for you to sleep off the soreness your body retains.

"There you go, baby. I know you don't like it, but it'll make your throat feel better, so you have to drink the whole thing." He settles down next to you, on his side of the bed and watches you sip on the steaming hot drink.

The familiar scrunch of your nose appears at the taste that hits your taste buds, a sight that Toji has started looking forward to. "I hate the flavor just a little more every time I drink it. Oh well," you say, taking another sip, ignoring the scalding heat that embraces your tongue.

"I know. It sucks," he says, pressing a kiss to your temple. "Hopefully, next time we choose correctly and get something you'll like."

You set the mug down on the nightstand and turn to him. With warm hands, you cup his cheeks and tilt his head up slightly.

"What?" He asks, his eyes directed towards you.

Your smile evolves into a short giggle as you stare at one pinpointed spot on the side of his neck. "I got you, too. Right..." you drag a finger down his neck, gently pressing on the dark spot you left on him. "...here."

His hand tracks your touch and replaces it with his own, feeling the mark. "Damn right, you did. You got me, baby," he says through a grin. "My turn?"

You sigh, with faux irritation. "Fiiine."

"Let's see..." He cups your cheeks the way you did his. "I got this whole area here." His thumb brushes over your jawline, dragging beneath it to where the marks end. "Then there's this entire patch right here." He turns your head, exposing the reddish-purple splotches on the side of your neck to the light. His eyes trace the slope that leads to your shoulder, spotting the marks that remain visible beneath the collar of your shirt. He coordinates his touch with his sight, dragging his fingers over your delicate skin. "Right here," he says, after pulling the collar of your shirt down your shoulder, revealing more of his marks.

"Okay, okay. You win," you say fixing your shirt, covering up again.

"There's one right there," he continues, tapping the column of your neck. "Some more there," his finger glides over your left collarbone.

"Toji, I swear, if you point out one more, i'm gonna bite your finger off."

He stares at you silently, the corners of his lips twitching as you watch him, intently. After a few seconds, he slowly starts directing his finger towards a mark on your chest. Once he makes contact with your skin, he gently presses on the smear of color that marks it, still holding eye contact with you. "Here, too."

You swat his hand away from you, and huff. "Why did I even try to threaten you? You want me to bite your finger off, huh?"

"Not in the slightest. I just knew you weren't actually gonna do it, so I pushed it."

You cross your arms. "Whatever. I'm just gonna put a hoodie on so you can't look at them anymore."

"Woah, baby, put down the knife," he says, hands up in playful surrender. "No need to take drastic measures over this. Don't hide all my hard work."

"Hard work," you mutter, an incredulous scoff following.

Toji's gaze falls on your lips. "You're pouting like you wanna be kissed," he teases.

"And you're... you're being annoying," you say, covering your mouth with your hand, concealing the involuntary lift of your lips.

"Yeah, but you still want me to kiss you," he says, with a sly, knowing smirk on his face. "Look at you. Look at that blush. Even your knuckles are red, doll."

"Oh my god..." you groan with embarrassment. You use both hands to cover your entire face, now.

He chuckles, pulling you into his arms. "You're so pretty, ma. A total work of art." His hands have never gotten lost on you, but for now, in any way he holds you, he'll be able to see the trails his lips left behind.

"Stop..." you mumble, smiling softly at the sweetness poured into his words.

"You look mine, with all these marks," he says, pulling down the collar of your shirt a little, to see the blots of color that appear at the start of your spine.

"Shut up," you say, blushing furiously against his chest.

"Sounds like you still want that kiss, huh?"

"Not anymore," you say, lifting your gaze to meet his. The look in your eyes betrays every ounce of your denial. Toji can very clearly tell that you're lying.

"Those rosy cheeks are saying something else," he says, grinning. "Damn, look at those pretty lips. They're ready for me."

"If you want to kiss me, just say so," you chide, lightheartedly.

"I'm gonna kiss you so hard, doll," he says, cupping your cheeks again. "Your lips lack a little more of me."

[fastandcarlos]

Friends With Benefits : ̗̀➛ Lando Norris

summary: you're so used to playing your games with lando, but when a chance at loves come your way, are you both ready to call it quits?

Your hands rested over your face as you rolled off of Lando, laying beside him, staring up at the ceiling of his plush apartment. Out of the corner of your eye you could see the wide smile on his face, his chest heaving as he tried his best to catch his breath again. 

You reached across and took your phone, scrolling through what you had missed. Your notifications were pretty empty with the exception of one, groaning as you read through the message of a new contact you’d added, feeling guilt smack you in the face. 

The noise you made had Lando glancing across at you, eyes studying you closely. You didn’t look happy after sleeping with him like you usually did, instead, you almost looked as if you were regretting it. 

“Everything good?” Lando asked you, turning to lay on his side, smiling weakly across at you. 

“Yeah, I’m all good,” you replied, your voice faltering. You turned your phone off, promising to make sure that you replied later on, tossing it onto the nightstand beside you. 

As you and Lando laid in silence, your mind was still racing a thousand miles. You couldn’t shake the feeling of guilt that you had, having recently found yourself striking up a close friendship, or so you thought, with someone new, you weren’t sure if Lando was still the one for you anymore. 

After a few minutes, you turned onto your side so that you were facing Lando too, tucking your hand underneath your pillow as Lando’s eyes landed on you too.  

“How long do you see this being your future? Before you settle down?” 

Lando’s shoulders shrugged in reply to you. “I’ve never really thought about it, I don’t exactly see myself settling down anytime soon. I’m just enjoying having fun. You?” 

“I mean, it would be nice to settle down at some point.” 

Lando’s lips pursed together, slightly taken aback by your response. He was sure that you enjoyed spending time with him as much as he did you, but now he wasn’t so sure. 

“What are you trying to say?” 

It had always meant nothing with Lando, and that was the way that you liked it. But now someone else had shown interest, someone who had the potential to be a bit more serious, you needed to weigh up which direction you wanted to take yourself in. 

“Is there someone who makes you want to settle down?” 

“Why’d you ask Lan?” 

“Because you’re different,” he noted, “you wouldn’t usually ask me something like this.” 

Your smile was weak, you were supposed to be happy but with the way that Lando looked at you, you couldn’t be enthusiastic. You were sure you’d shut things down with Lando with ease, but his eyes stared at you with sadness, almost making you feel guilty. 

“I’d never make you do this if you didn’t want to.” 

“I’ve always wanted to do this Lando,” you assured him, “why else do you still think I come every time that you call? I don’t know what it is that I want, I enjoy this, whatever this is but at the same time there’s a guy that I met. We only met a couple of weeks ago, but it just feels different, it’s more a date kind of thing, it’s not all about the sex.” 

“Is he the only guy for you?” Lando asked you, his voice much quieter than it was before. “I mean if you want to settle down, is he the only guy you could see yourself doing it with?” 

Your shoulders shrugged, you simply didn’t have the answer that Lando was looking for. You’d never really thought about Lando before, after all the two of you agreed to cut off any emotions when you agreed to your deal, but now he had your heart asking all sorts of questions. 

“You just told me you didn’t want to settle down,” you sighed, “that kind of tells me that the two of us just want different things moving forwards Lando.” 

“I’d make an exception though.” 

Your eyes flickered up, it didn’t take a genius to know exactly who Lando was talking about, all he knew was that he couldn’t lose you. 

“How can I trust that you really mean that? How do I trust that you’re not just saying that because you’re scared you’re going to lose the person you go to every time you want sex?” 

“Because otherwise I’d just let you go and walk out of that door now.” 

You went to speak, but quickly stopped, your mind foggy with thoughts. It was the easy choice to just go, but you didn’t always want to just take the easy choice in life. 

“I’m not going to force you to stay.” 

Your eyes closed as you tried your best to gather your thoughts. “I don’t know what I want right now Lando, I never thought that you would actually want me to stay.” 

He surprised himself by how much he wanted you there, Lando had never anticipated quite how big of a role you would play in his life, but now he couldn’t imagine his life without you there. 

“I know we would be good together, scrap that, I think we would be absolutely electric together.” 

“It’s not as easy as just sleeping together though Lando.” 

His head nodded, knowing exactly what he was getting himself into entering into a relationship with you, confident though that he could absolutely do it. 

“I know, but that’s all part of the fun figuring it out, right?” 

Lando brought his hand up, brushing it against the side of your face before cupping against your cheek, his touch more delicate than it ever had been before. Your eyes didn’t know where to look as Lando pulled you closer towards him, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. 

“It’s not as easy as this Lan, there’s someone else involved here too. This guy is nice, he makes me feel as if I’m safe, I can’t remember the last time that I actually felt that way.” 

“Who would you want to lose though? Me or him?” 

It was the question that you didn’t want, at the start of the night your mind was made up, but now you found yourself leaning in the complete other direction, a direction you never actually managed yourself going in. 

“Admit it, this has always felt special.” 

“It’s felt special because of what we do, we barely talk Lando, you could probably barely tell me a single fact about myself, could you?” 

“But I want to learn and find out more,” he argued, “I want to know all those little details about you, I want to talk to you about stupid things because that’s what proper couples do.” 

“Do you really mean that Lando?” 

His head nodded in reply straight away. “I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t mean it. Just give me one chance to show you how serious I am, if I fail, then I’ll let you go.” 

Lando’s eyes looked pleadingly at you, letting go of a shaky breath as your head nodded, trusting that your instincts would serve you well. 

As much as the other guy made you smile, you couldn’t ignore the way that Lando made you feel, the excitement you had racing through your body every time you were in his company. 

“Let’s go out tomorrow, my treat,” Lando suggested, “let me show you how serious I am and we can go on a date, get to know each other properly.” 

“That would be good,” you whispered, “but you know I’ve got high expectations.” 

“Don’t worry, I promise to live up to them.” 

˗ˏˋ 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ! ´ˎ˗

[auroralwriting]

clean 1

tfatws! bucky barnes x stark! reader (no use of y/n)

after the fight with john walker, you can tell bucky's arm was bothering him. so, you make a trip to see him.

word count: 1.6k | warnings: strong language, multiple parts, part two

Your suit was practically scarp metal after the fight with John Walker. He had tried his hardest to absolutely obliterate your suit. Thankfully, Tony had done a great job of designing it. With a few hours of repairs, it would be good as new.

The one thing you worried about was Bucky's arm, specifically the metal one. You saw how Walker had thrown Bucky across the room into wiring, causing it to shock Bucky's whole body. It made you uneasy to think about wether or wether not the arm was in tact, that and the fact that if it wasn't, it could very well lead to a lot of pain for Bucky.

So, using Friday, you found Bucky's new address. He'd taken residence in a small apartment in Brooklyn, thankfully, not too far from where you were reclaiming the Stark Tower. One car ride later, and you stood outside Bucky's apartment feeling more nervous than you thought you would be.

While Bucky and you weren't on bad terms, it was fair to say he was still uneasy around you. I mean, he had killed your parents, and your only living relative (minus the small Morgan) was also dead. You'd been a baby when The Winter Soldier killed Howard and Maria, so how could there be any bad blood between you and Bucky? You didn't even know what you had lost. That and you were more down-to-earth than Tony, realizing quickly the guilt and shame Bucky felt for his mind-controlled actions.

Using up the last bit of confidence you had, you knocked on Bucky's door. It took less than a minute, and Bucky's surprised face was staring back at you.

"Uhm, hi," You said awkwardly.

"How'd you know where I live?" Bucky asked, confused.

You held up your phone, Friday's screen appearing. "Just a quick scan of all James Buchanan Barnes in the area. Not very many," Your joke fell flat as you stood awkwardly while Bucky processed what was happening.

"Why're you here?" He asked.

"I wanted to make sure you were okay after the fight with Walker." You replied. "I saw you get thrown into all those wires, I saw all the sparks."

Bucky gave a small shrug, "I'm alright."

You eyed his arm suspiciously, "That arm causing you any pain?"

Both eyes now fell on Bucky's arm. You looked back up to Bucky to see him staring at it still. "It's been better," He sighed, his reply honest.

"I can fix it if you'd like?" You suggested. Bucky's eyes nearly popped out of his head at your words, "Or not!" You quickly added. "I, uh, don't want to make you feel weird..er than you probably already do."

Bucky went to move his arm, and you saw the traces of pain etched into his features. "It'll be alright."

"Our fight isn't over yet, Bucky." You argued. "You should be at your best." You took a deep breath in, finding more confidence from deep within, "I promise I won't judge you if that's what you're worried about. I mean, Tony literally had a hunk of metal plunged in his chest, and he made me clean it out all the time, it was really gross and-"

"Alright, alright," Bucky held his hands up. "I don't wanna hear about Tony's gross chest-hole. Just, come on in." The door opened all the way as Bucky walked inside. You trailed behind, slowly shutting the door behind you as you observed the apartment. It was really empty, just a small couch and a coffee table in front of it. The kitchen looked rather bare, too.

You took a seat on the couch, Bucky sitting next to you. You set your toolbox down in between the both of you, putting some space between your bodies.

"I need to see the connection point, if you don't mind?" You said softly, looking to Bucky's covered shoulder.

"Oh, yeah, yeah," He muttered as he hesitantly slipped off his shirt. You quickly noticed the healing scars on his shoulder, all around the joint, but you made sure to pay no attention to them as you hovered your hand over his arm. "It's fine," He said, watching your hesitantcy.

The metal was cool on your hands as you felt around it, looking for the weak point. Once you found it, you grabbed your tools and began to work at it. You weren't used to working in silence, so you tried to make some conversation.

"Steve, uh, used to tell me a lot about you." You said. Bucky raised a brow at you as you continued. "You were his knight in shining armor, or something of the sorts."

"I guess I was," Bucky gave the smallest hint of a smile. "How'd you learn how to do this anyways?"

You shrugged as you grabbed a new tool, "Tony taught me everything I know. Engineering, chemistry, physics, you name it."

"It must've been hard, just you two." Bucky said softly.

Looking up, you shook your head, "Don't start that," You said.

"But it's my fault-"

"For the last time, Bucky, that was the Winter Soldier, not you. I do not blame you, there's no reason to keep hurting yourself over this." You cut Buck off, voice slightly sharp with intention. Bucky's eyes fell on the other side of the room as you sighed, "Tony would have forgiven you, too. He just needed time."

Bucky scoffed, "He had five years."

"Of which we were gone," You countered. "I forgive you for him and myself, okay?"

“Don’t say that,” Bucky shook his head. “Just.. don’t?”

You set down your tool, staring at him. “Do you want proof?”

This gained Bucky’s interest, “Proof?” He asked, voice laced with doubt. “What proof?”

“Who do you think protected your whereabouts in Wakanda?” You asked, “Steve and Sam were on the run. Of course Tony knew you were there. I remember when he got the call. He just sat there for a while, thinking. When we talked about it, he said he was glad you were getting help.”

“What else did he say?” Bucky said with a knowing look in his eyes.

You rolled your eyes, “It’s Tony, Buck. He says anything and everything and means almost none of it.” Bucky didn’t expect you to use his nickname. He liked the sound of it coming from your voice.

“That doesn’t mean he forgave me.” Bucky said.

“Well I do, okay? So stop being such a grump. I’m trying to be your friend, just let me, would you?” You sighed as you began to work on his arm again.

The soldier gave a small sigh, “Stop wasting your time on me when you have a company to run.”

“Stop trying to push me away. Also, Pepper’s helping me run it, so I have all the time in the world.” You argued.

After a brief moment of silence, Bucky spoke again. “I’m still not sure I’m safe to be around,”

The honesty surprised you, making you glance up at him to observe his face. “I’m literally face to face with your arm, tool inside it, and you wanna say you aren’t safe?”

Your comment made Bucky give a small chuckle, “That’s not really what I meant.”

“Then what did you mean?” You asked.

Bucky gave a shaky breath, “In Madripoor, when I had to take down those guys when I was pretending to be.. him,” Bucky explained, “It’s like I could still feel him trying to break free.”

You set a hand on Bucky’s shoulder, making sure to avoid his scars. “Bucky, Wankanda said you’re a free man. The Winter Soldier’s gone.”

“Maybe I’m just so used to violence now.” Bucky offered, “Maybe it’s who I am.”

“No,” You replied quickly. “You are Bucky Barnes. You’re Steve’s best friend, Sergeant Barnes. You’re Sam’s friend, my friend, and you’re a survivor. You’re one hell of a fighter, you’re a victim who pushed through all his pain and suffering to become a better man, and that’s exactly who you are.” Your words left Bucky feeling like he could cry, but he just looked away. You didn’t know whether what you said was right or wrong.

“Thank you,” Bucky muttered as you began to work on his arm again.

“It’s no problem, Bucky.” You responded. You silently worked, trying to ignore the burning sensation of Bucky’s eyes poring holes into your head.

"This world doesn't deserve you," Bucky muttered as you worked. You simply hummed in reply, making Bucky's forehead crease. "I mean it, Stark. You're one of the best people in this world."

Rolling your eyes, you put away the last of your tools. "Bucky, I'm just being a decent person."

Bucky's eyes burned with a new passion, "No decent person would do all you've done for everyone you've ever come across." Before you could protest, Bucky's metal hand grabbed your chin softly. "Don't even try to argue, I know it can be hard for a Stark but can you hold your tongue?" When you didn't reply, Bucky continued. "You're so humble, so fuckin' sweet. I mean, you came all this way just to fix my arm."

"And to check on you," Your voice came out babbled as Bucky's hold on your chin was still present.

"I don't deserve your kindness," Bucky admitted, "But here you are, giving me all of it." His eyes bore into your own, his own actions betraying his mind as he slammed his lips tightly onto your own. It took you by surprise, but you happily returned the heated kiss as Bucky's hand slithered behind your neck.

"You deserve all of it, the whole world," You mumbled as you pulled away breathlessly. "The world did you dirty, and I'll be the one to wash you of it." With your words, Bucky felt his eyes water as he kissed you passionately again.

Once you pulled apart, Bucky wiped your lips with his thumb, a small smile on his lips. "Does that mean you're gonna stick around?"

"Yeah," you giggled, "I think it does."

[writingouthere]

friendswithbenefits!Sukuna x reader

You go on a date with Yuuji's colleague from work and he's nice but you can't stop thinking of Sukuna, your 'friend' with benefits who has made it clear to you that the two of you are not in a relationship.

cw: possessive behavior, smut

"So then the kid and his friends tried to say that there must just be a fire somewhere."

You snort. "And what the fire just happened to smell like weed?"

You both laugh and you take another sip of your drink. It's a little milder than you usually like, but it's growing on you, kind of like your date.

His name is Yuuta and he's a teacher at the same school as Yuuji. He's cute, not much older than you and he's been polite to every member of staff you've encountered at this restaurant tonight. He teaches history to some of the older grades and it's clear he's passionate about what he does. He's spent the past half hour telling you funny stories about the kids he teaches and stories about his co-workers that have you almost choking on your drink. You've heard about a lot of the same staff members from Yuuji so they feel familiar, like you know them, even the ones you haven't actually met yet.

"Sorry, I think I've been going on for a while. I tend to ramble when I get nervous." He scratches the back of his head, the gesture self deprecating, but so charming, and you hate the guilt you feel at being charmed by it.

"I like your rambling, it's cute," you tell him and you find yourself fond of the way he blushes in response.

It's been a long time since you went on on a real date and you've missed the ritual of it. The typical questions and nerves are as banal as ever, but there were the good parts too.

The excitement of getting to know a new person, the way that over the course of the night you imagine how your life may fit with theirs. Which friends could you see them getting along with? Did he keep his apartment clean? How would he kiss you at the end of the night.

A look at his mouth had you thinking he had to be a great kisser.

"What about you? Any crazy co-workers?"

The rest of the night goes smoothly. The food is good, the drinks were lovely, he cuts himself off after his second.

Responsible. Kind. Funny.

He was everything you were looking for and yet.

And yet.

Sometimes when he laughs, you think about another man's laugh. One that's less kind, louder, and so expressive it takes over his whole face when he lets it out.

When Yuuta helps you with your coat, you can't help but imagine his face twisting up in derision at the sight.

What? Forget how to use your arms, princess?

Yuuta and you are talking about a movie you'd both seen recently and liked, and he's so perfect. But he's not yours.

"I had a great time, tonight." You both are taking the same subway home, but your stop comes up first. Your train car is empty and when Yuuta leans in to kiss you, you let him.

It's chaste, sweet and not what you're looking for tonight. The knowing smile he wears when he pulls away tells you he knows it too.

"I had a great time too, text me when you get home?" Your rejection, even an unsaid one, does nothing to change his temper towards you. It's almost a shame, you'd kind of like to see what he could be like with a little more of a spark to him.

"I will!"

You wave and step off the platform and walk home to your apartment. He'd sent you a text checking in earlier but you hadn't answered yet He hadn't sent a follow up, probably distracted. He'd gone out with Megumi and some guys from gym he trained at. He was probably well on his way to being throroughly trashed.

You turn your key in the lock and open the door to your apartment. It's dark and cold. You don't really want to spend the rest of your night alone with your thoughts. You shut the door, lock it and take out your phone. You think about sending a text to Yuuji to see where he is but then change your mind. You don't necessarily feel like sitting a sports bar on a Friday night listening to a bunch of gymbros talk about macros or their upper body circuit.

You could try texting one of your girlfriends, but then you'd have to actually have a meaningful conversation and your brain was one sharp tug away from unraveling.

You bite your lip. There was someone you'd like to see.

"This is a bad idea." You look down at your shoes. "Such a bad idea."

You find yourself outside of bad idea's apartment and your hand is knocking before you can second guess yourself.

The door swings open with your fist still poised to knock again.

"So the date didn't go too well then?"

You bring your arm down, fist still clenched. You had to at least give it to Sukuna, he was fucking consistent. He leaned against the doorway, looking comfortable with how the position allowed him to leer over you and with his choice of casual attire.

He was wearing an old tank top and sweats that looked like they were one wash away from just disintegrating. They did nothing to hide anything and you hated how you couldn't stop your gaze from going down.

"It was a nice date, actually." He hummed and looked over his nails, as if checking his cuticles.

"There's that word again." Sukuna still wasn't looking at you but his smugness filled the air like a pipe had burst that housed particularly toxic fumes. "If he was so nice," the sound came out like a hiss, "then why are you here?"

You didn't answer and when it was clear you weren't going to, Sukuna finally looked up at you.

"I'll tell you why you're here, you know, if you're curious." He stood up to his full height and grabbed your arm, pulling you close to him. When you were right next to each other, he grabbed your chin, pulling you up as he bent down so you were face to face.

His breath smelled like the ginger tea he always had before bed. It was spicy, familiar, it made your hands clench with the urge to hold him.

"You're here because that nice boy wasn't going to fuck you right and that's what you want isn't it," his hand cupped your face, his breath warm on your cheek as he cursed in your ear, "to get fucked?"

You couldn't help yourself from shivering and you nodded as he began to press kisses down your neck. Pulling down the neckline of your dress, probably stretching it, ruining it, and you don't even care, you just want his hands on you.

"Use your words, baby. Tell me is that why you came here? You needed to get fucked right and you knew that I was the only one who could do that for you, isn't that right?" He ends his words with a bite to your collarbone that stops your legs from working right.

You wrap your arms around his neck, your hands going into his soft hair that you know he uses conditioner on and you hate how just the smell of him sends a pulse to your core. That the familiarness of him is just as sexy as his words.

Something about the feel of him in your hands, his words in your ears, his teeth against your neck, it's the same dance you two have done dozens of times and it just keeps getting better. How are you supposed to be satisfied with someone else and when no one else has ever touched you like this, like they know every place that makes you weak, like they were put on this earth just to unmake you?

"Tell me," his words are more urgent now but he doesn't wait for you to answer, pulling you into his apartment and pushing you up against the door after he slams it so hard you're worried the hinges may have snapped. "Tell me, tell me princess. Tell me I'm the only one who can get you like this, the only one who can see you like this."

It's too possessive, too overwhelming. If your mind was still in working order, you may point out these are claims too heavy for a casual hookup. That he was not your boyfriend, or your husband, or anything to you and yet you found yourself nodding anyway.

"Just you, just you Sukuna." For a second he almost seems to freeze and you worry that you said something wrong despite him starting this. That worry is ripped from you when he smashes his mouth to yours, the force of it almost painful. It's an abrupt departure from the other kiss you'd gotten tonight and you wonder if the taste of another man on you fuels him as he starts to pull at your clothes.

You're both barely undressed, only removing what needs to be removed to get him inside you, when he presses his cock against your cunt. It's so hot and you'll never get over how good he fills you, how right it feels when he's inside you and Sukuna finally lets go of your mouth when you let out a moan you're sure they can hear in the hallway. You can feel his grin against your throat and you don't even mind as he settles in you, making you almost uncomfortably full.

"S-Sukuna!"

"Yeah, does that feel good? Like how my cock feels in you?" You don't answer him, not really capable of speech. He hums and pulls out of you just enough for you to feel it when he thrusts back in. You've fucked countless times, it's not even your first time fucking against the front door, which should embarrass you a little more, but something feels different.

Something feels different as Sukuna proceeds to fuck you hard, but somehow gentle, the beat between each thrust calculated for you to get overwhelmed by the feel of him to the point of it being too much just for him to pull away from you, but never fully leave you.

The kisses you exchange are sloppy, more a pressing of mouths together than real kissing and yet it's perfect and he's perfect and you could have tried this with the nice young man you'd gone on a date with tonight, who you're currently forgetting the name of, but what was the point? How could you try and find anyone to take Sukuna's place when he had carved it out himself inside you.

After you've both cum and you feel too tired to even attempt to collect your clothing or your dignity so you can leave, Sukuna lifts you up and carries you to his bedroom. The routine the two of you had previously established was off and you weren't sure what to do about it. You tried not to think about it as he carried you to the bathroom and cleaned you off or as he pulled an old t-shirt over your head. You tried not to think about it even more when he tucked you into bed.

He slid into the bed behind you and pulled you into his arms and you weren't sure how much more you could take before you could ignore it anymore.

He pressed his lips against the back of your neck, his arms tight around you. "Don't do that again."

"Dm mat?" Your words are muddled by sleepiness and the comforter that smells like him that you've pressed to your face.

"Don't go on dates with other guys."

It's not fair, he couldn't ask that of you and you shouldn't let him.

You grab his hands in yours and thread your fingers through them.

"In the morning."

You'll talk about this in the morning, about how you need boundaries and space and maybe this arrangement needs to end. Sukuna hums and presses closer to you, you can feel his lips in your hair.

The both of you can get on the same page in the morning.

Just a little something. Maybe this is a series now? Does the tense change partway through, yes. Does it change in fact multiple times, yes. Idk.

[ninibeingdelulu]

how would megumi confess or act towards the girl he’s secretly getting a crush on? ofc both itadori and kugisaki noticed it, thank uuu

How he act when he have a crush on you ft. megumi fushiguro

a/n: tyy anon for requesting, I love this idea so much >.< .I hope u like it

You've been part of the tight-knit quartet since day one at Jujutsu High, instantly bonding over all the intense craziness you were thrown into as first-years.

Megumi was a bit prickly and standoffish at first, but you were one of the few brave enough to playfully needle him until he cracked a smile.

Over time, Megumi began opening up more around you specifically. There was something innately reassuring about your warm, supportive presence that helped soothe the Fushiguro scion's lingering loneliness and guilt.

Itadori and Kugisaki don't fail to notice how Megumi's eyes linger fractionally longer whenever you laugh or gently tease him.

The faintest hints of pink dust his cheekbones as he drops his usual guarded frown into a rare soft smile reserved only for you.

The merciless teasing quickly commences - Kugisaki makes obnoxious kissy faces every time you enter the room, while Itadori not-so-discreetly shoves Megumi or elbows his ribs whenever you're nearby.

Megumi just grits his teeth, ears burning as he hisses at them to shut up already.

You, forever oblivious, just assume the three friends are goofing around as usual. Turning your bright, curious gaze onto them only makes Megumi's heart stutter harder while Itadori and Kugisaki’s cackles grow louder each time.

Any brief alone moments with Megumi are cherished - like when you grab his arm for balance scrambling out of the fissures after his technique backfires in training.

Your hands linger almost shyly yet still electrified by the contact.

Out of earshot, he vehemently denies everything to Kugisaki's ever-present smirk and Itadori's goading - "just freaking TELL her, dude! Stop being a punk!" But the mere thought of confessing makes Megumi seize up, gut roiling.

Until one day on a mission, a cursed spirit catches you completely off guard with a brutal attack as Megumi can only watch in paralyzed horror.

Moments from being skewered, his fear for your life overrides all restraint as he instinctively summons the full extent of his domain.

By the time Itadori and Kugisaki join him, the twisted creature has literally been crushed into dust.

You're clutched tightly against Megumi's heaving chest as he holds you like his life-force itself.

"Don't ever scare me like that," he growls into your hair, lavender eyes squeezing shut as if in excruciating pain. "I...can't lose you too..."

You freeze, finally realizing what your friends had been seeing all along through new senses electrified by his proximity.

Megumi's heart pounds double-time against his ribs pressed to yours.

Itadori and Kugisaki exchange a loaded look and quietly slip away to give you two some space.

Sure enough, Megumi tilts your chin up with shaking fingers, finally meeting your eyes unflinchingly as the words tumble out in a shaky exhale...

[boltwrites]

I haven’t recently thought about Hugh Jackman but this Movie has recently given me hunger™️

Reader/Logan fic hurt/comfort where Logan knew reader in his world (but reader never met Logan in their world) and tries to ignore them out of guilt but reader is persistently trying to be friends w him. Eventually Logan opens up about what happened in his world with reader…

A/N: so uh. i originally wrote this as headcanons in bullet point format but tumblr didn't like it so i had to redo some shit and uh. anyway. it's not my normal fic quality so i'm sorry for that.

in other author's note news - lmk if you want the recipe.

You smiled at Logan across the table as Wade rambled on about something or other. You didn't know him - well, other than what Wade had spouted off about him before inviting you to this make-birthday party after the first one went to shit - but you wanted to.

You didn't exactly know why you wanted that. Maybe just curiosity? Wade did say he'd be living with him for the foreseeable future, and as his neighbor, you should introduce yourself and be friendly, right?

But it was kind of more than that. He was hot. definitely, very hot. Maybe not your usual type - you weren't typically into older men. But there was just something about him. Something magnetic.

Either way, he'd definitely avoided you at that party. spent most of his time sulking in the corner, talking to Al or sometimes Colossus.

You'd walked up to him, smile on your face, and introduced yourself. He'd barely looked at you.

"Nice to meet you," he'd replied, his tone gruff and dismissive. By the way he spoke it sounded less like it was nice to meet you and more like you were inconveniencing him with your mere existence. Like he'd been dreading the idea of you coming over and introducing yourself.

"Wade says you helped stop the time ripper," you tried, willing yourself to ignore how shitty he was treating you. Wade had mentioned that this man - Logan - was a little rough around the edges. rude. A drunk, even. Maybe he just wasn't good with people in general.

"Yep," he replied, shooting you a glare over the glass of - was that pure fucking bourbon? - he was sipping out of. You tried your best not to let it get to you - but you also knew how to take a hint. He wasn't interested in talking. That shot straight to your stomach like a bullet made of embarrassment and guilt, but whatever.

It's fine. you were younger than him by a decent margin. He could probably tell just by the look in your eyes that you were interested in him as more than just a friend. He probably just wanted to shut that shit down as quickly and efficiently as possible. You weren't gonna blame him for that. You've done the same for several weird men in the past - including Wade, before he got the hint and the two of you became fast friends. You weren't necessarily interested in being his post-Vanessa rebound, and he respected that.

So, that's fine, you'd just be nice to Logan. He could be your friend, too. He was rooming with Wade and Al, after all. It would be good to make friends with him.

"Hey!" You smiled when he opened the door a few days after the party. You stood there, hands currently occupied by a tin foil-wrapped package.

"What do you want?" Logan asked, looking you up and down with more paranoia than you'd expected. You thought that maybe he was just uncomfortable with your advances, but this time, it was like he was searching for something. What, you didn't know.

"I just wanted to give you this," you replied, thrusting your gift into his hands - the smooth glass of the pie mold contrasting with the brief brush of his calloused hands. You tried not to shiver.

"It's a pie," you continued on, even as Logan stared off into the distance, at something you couldn't see. "When I saw what you were drinking at the party, I thought you might like it. It's a family recipe. Pumpkin pie with a shitload of bourbon. As a welcome to the neighborhood kind of thing."

You offered him an awkward sort of smile, a little shrug. He blinked, snapping himself out of his thousand yard stare only to glare at you like you'd just offered him a dead animal instead of a home-baked pie. Your blood briefly turned to ice as you wondered if maybe this man was actually sober and you'd mistake the iced tea in his glass as pure liquor. As if Wade ever had that sort of shit in his apartment.

"I-" he looked down at the pie, then up at you, taking a breath as if he wanted to say more, but instead shaking his head, like he was knocking some bit of cobwebs or old dust loose. "Thanks."

He nodded at you in acknowledgement, then slammed the door in your face. Great.

Wade wasn't much help either. He'd returned the pie dish and you'd wrung your hands and asked him if you'd done something that made Logan hate you. The dish was empty, but your stomach churned at the thought of the man just taking a knife and scraping the whole thing into the trash. You'd even made the crust by hand, too.

"Oh, fuck no!" Wade scoffed, shaking his head. "Are you kidding me? Listen, if there's anything I know about our not-so-furry friend, it's that he can put up with a metric fuckton of asinine shit. I mean - he's living with me! Do you know how many times he's used his little clawsies to hole-punch my organs? Like - so many!" Wade waved his arms for emphasis. "If he really hated you, he wouldn't just sulk around about it like a teenager - no! He'd hurt you! Like the kind of teenager that would shoot up their local high school!"

You rolled your eyes at Wade, but you knew that's just how he was. No filter, all idiocy. "Did he - did he at least try the pie," you asked, voice a little more hopeful than you'd meant for it to sound.

"Try it - fuck! That man has full-tilt sprinted at me on all fours and I've never seen him so animalistic. He was eating that pie like it would crawl inside his dick itself and pull out an orgasm. I swear - and may Thor strike me dead and then mourn my fried corpse - that he actually growled when I asked for a slice."

You didn't believe Wade for a second, but fuck. at least that made you feel better. You offered him your thanks and a sweet smile as you received your dish and promised to make him something "Wolvie" wouldn't hoard when you brought something over next. You promised to try your best.

Really, what you'd try your best at was winning this shy Wolverine over to your good side. You didn't want to force him to be your friend, obviously - but if you had made a bad impression, even if that impression was solely based on the fact that you were also friends with Wade - you wanted to make it right.

So you did everything you could. Baked and cooked and offered the results up whenever you could afford the extra ingredients. Made sure to snatch up any packages bound for Wade's apartment so your notorious Amazon thief didn't have the chance to. You even dog-sat that nasty looking creature Wade had adopted - she was very sweet, but you had nightmares about that tongue.

It all came to a head, one day. One day when you almost brained yourself walking up the stairs.

You'd been holding grocery bags - supplies to make your perfected mac and cheese recipe - head down as you ascended the steps. That was, until you ran into what felt like a brick wall. Or, an iron one. Your shoulder smacked whatever it was and you jolted backwards, gasping as you dropped the bag you were holding to cling to the railing-

Only to catch and grip tight at thin fabric as a firm, steel-strong arm wrapped around your waist. You finally caught your breath, lungs filling and then immediately vacating as you locked eyes with none other than Logan.

"Fuck."

Both of you said it. But you gasped, it, breathless and dreamy. Meanwhile he spat it, like he knew something like this would happen, and he'd been planning his whole day to avoid it.

As soon as you found your footing again, he threw his arm away from you like you'd burned him. Like your very existence was offensive to him, somehow. He manages to spin you around as he let go of your waist, disorient you as you sputtered, glancing after him.

The stairs were littered with groceries - blocks of cream cheese, butter, cookies for the crust - fresh fruit for the filling. A bag of sugar had exploded, its contents dusting the next landing like snow. All of this - ingredients you'd bought, with money you'd worked your ass off to afford - and the man you'd been trying to impress stepped in that puddle of sugar, granules crackling under his boot.

You damn near saw red.

"Logan!" you snapped, your voice harsh, crisp as it echoed through the stairwell. Fuck. You hated using that voice - but it made him freeze on the spot.

He turned to look at you - eyes wide, as if he was some child who'd been caught in a lie. But also - that gaze was knowing, somehow. Like he knew what you used that voice for. What it meant for him.

You sighed, tried to regain your composure. It was fine. You were fine. When you opened your eyes, you addressed him with even, annunciated words:

"Why do you hate me?"

Even as you tried your best to dull your voice of emotion, it slipped through. A waved of your throat, the hint of water in your eyes. You hated it - this man didn't hold that power over you. You just - you were used to being liked. That's all.

Logan looked at you like you'd shot him.

"What?" he asked, just as breathless as you felt. You thought you detected just a hint of hurt in that syllable.

"It-it's just-" you tried not to let yourself waver, but you stuttered as you spoke. "I've been trying to just - to be your friend, to be a good neighbor. Like I am to Wade, like we - we hang out, sometimes. But you- you're just - I feel like you've been kind of rude to me."

You sounded like a child.

Logan took a breath. A deep one, as if this were a confrontation that had been a long time coming (which it was) and that he was prepared to have a conversation he'd dreaded (which was really what got you - if he really just disliked you, why would he care enough to prepare something? What was going on?)

He turned around - gathered up all your dropped groceries - and started walking up the stairs, passing you and continuing his way to your shared floor. He'd previously been on his way out, so you didn't do much except stare at him until he was nearly half a flight ahead of you and your brain finally switched on again.

He led you to the apartment he shared with Wade, nodded as he held the door open for you. It felt strange - you hadn't been inside the apartment since the party. You'd always felt too nervous to ask Wade if he wanted to continue your usual game nights. Too intimidated by Logan.

He set the groceries on the counter, and practically sank into the couch. You perched on the chair opposite it, still not quite believing that he had let you in. That you were going to talk. He breathed in deeply, steadying himself before he spoke, eyes still glued to the floor.

"I'm not from here. 'M sure Wade told you that much," he glanced up, only to nod in your direction. You nodded back.

"My world - timeline, whatever the fuck - I killed it. Everyone I loved, everyone I cared about - they all died. Because of me."

You sat in rapt attention as his shoulders tensed, his jaw flexed. This was a lot, for him. You didn't really understand why he was telling you about it, but it was important to him. So you listened.

"Every timeline is different. At least, that's what the science says. Ones that are closer together - might have the same people show up at around the same time. Might be - people I knew. People I - cared about."

Logan glanced up, again. Caught your eyes with his and swallowed harshly.

"You're - one of them. One of the people I lost."

"Oh," you breathed, because now it all made sense. The strange looks, the curt conversations - even the thousand yard stare. You were triggering his memories of a horrible time of his life with every step you took in his direction. And you didn't even know it.

"I'm so sorry," You whispered, trying your best to quell any tears that might form sympathetically. No wonder he kept pushing you away. You were a walking PTSD trigger.

"No-" he gasped, shaking his head as he stood up, like he'd been shocked upright. "No, it's not -"

He cleared his throat, shook his head like he was trying to find the right words.

"I know I was pushing you away. And it is - hard, to see you again. But - I want to see you. I want to get to know you, again," if you didn't know any better, you'd think that there were tears forming at the corner of his eyes.

"You made the pie, you know. The pumpkin pie. I was only there for the one Thanksgiving, but I remember it. You swore you'd cooked off all the liquor, but Xavier made you promise only the adults would get a slice."

He grinned at you, then - wide, real. It was pretty, that smile. You could imagine recognizing it, in another life.

"None of the kids got any. Too good for them, anyway," he took a step towards you, and you rose from your seat, legs only a little wobbly.

"That's good," you breathed, voice as shaky as your knees. "I use vodka in the crust, too."

"I know," Logan grinned, a hand grasping yours, his smile somehow wider than before.

You wondered, as you strode forward into a crushing hug against his chest, if it felt so right in every universe.

[rbfclassy]

STILL IN LOVE! #6 — TOJI FUSHIGURO

SYNOPSIS...after still messing around with your ex husband, you began to wonder if you’re still in love with him after finding out about his new girlfriend…

INFO...ex husband!toji x fem!reader, reader & toji have two kids, megumi is readers bio son, jealousy, smut, angst, arguments, alcohol, drinking problem, family problems, arguing in front of kids, toxic behaviors, crying, mentions of divorce

OTHER...likes and reblogs are appreciated

You laid on Kento’s chest, staring at the wall as his fingers traced patterns on your skin. You took a deep breath in, snuggling into him more and shut your eyes. The last few days you’ve been thinking about your argument with Toji, thinking about your kids. It always made your stomach twist in knots thinking about it because all that you could remember were the bad times. Everything good you guys had started to diminish from your memory. Even when you weren’t together, you two still couldn’t properly be there for your kids. From the first arguments to the last, you’d always remember the look on their faces when things got loud.

“Hey, you okay?” Kento asked, caressing your back. You’d think this man is psychic with the way he could tell something was always wrong with you.

“Just thinking,” you replied.

“Good things or bad things?” He questioned, looking down at you.

“About the kids, my family.” Another deep breath filled your lungs as you sat up. You couldn’t get a moments rest when it felt like your world was crumbling slowly in front of you.

“Sweetheart,” he cupped your cheek, “you’re a great mom to them. Just because you’ve had a couple bumps in the road doesn’t mean a thing,” he reassured.

“I know, but,” you looked at him, “Toji.” That name was all you had to say to Kento to make his smile drop.

“What about him?” He asked, sitting up.

“From the moment the arguments started and the divorced happened, it affected the kids so much. It still is and I’m scared it won’t change. He’s a good dad, he loves them so much, but me and him can never get level with each other,” you explained.

“Why do you think that is?” His brows knitted together. He rubbed the pad of thumb across your knuckles, an attempt to soothe you. It was a hard pill to swallow, but you knew why you and Toji could never come to a compromise. It was clear there was still something there. The feelings, the attraction. It was hard to let go of that relationship aspect and focus on the co parenting aspect.

“I’m not sure,” you responded.

“Talk to him about it, see if he knows.” He shrugged. “I know you’re probably thinking it’ll just end in another fight, but it’s worth a shot.”

You sighed, running your hands down your face. “It will end in another fight, trust me. I’ve been through enough—”

“Ah, shit.” Kento looked down at his phone.

“What?” You asked, puzzled.

“Work,” he sighed. “I gotta get going, sweetheart.” He planted a quick kiss on your cheek before getting out of bed.

“Wait, I thought you said you had a day off?” You looked up at him as he put his shirt on.

“Yeah, I know, but, it’s work. Not much I can do,” he chuckled.

“You said the same thing yesterday when it was supposed to be your day off.” Your brows furrowed.

“I know, I know, I’m sorry. I gotta go.” He planted another kiss on your cheek and cheek walked out the bedroom with his coat in hand. You sat there on the bed, watching him disappear. The front door open and shutting seconds after, leaving you in silence. Lying back down on the bed, you reached to the empty side. Guilt consumed you when images of Toji lying beside you flashed before your eyes instead of Kento. Quickly, you retracted your hand and turned the other way, pulling the blankets over your body.

“Mmm, daddy this ice cream is so good!” Naya licked her lips, trying to get the excess ice cream around her mouth.

“Yeah?” Toji chuckled, grabbing a napkin. “It’s my favorite.” He wiped her mouth.

“It’s my favorite too! Can I have more please?” She smiled up at him, a smile he could never say no to.

“Of course, baby girl.” He gave her another spoonful, watching her eyes light up when she got a fudge brownie piece. “How’s your ice cream, Megs?” Toji asked.

“Pretty good. Should’ve gotten gummy bears.” He slightly frowned, stabbing at contents in the cup.

Toji decided it would be nice to take the kids out for a while after what happened. The last few days everyone was in a bad mood, grouchy and exhausted. He hoped getting ice cream would help bring out their smiles again, even if it was winter time. He was trying his hardest to keep it together for his kids, for you as well. He thinks about you more than he likes to admit. How could he not when two of your kids are sitting in front of him? He can’t explain why he still feels the way he does about you, but he knows it’s genuine. But he’s also aware he deserves to see you happy with someone that isn’t him. He let your marriage fall apart, risking everything he’s ever cared about.

Toji also hates to admit that he thinks about your new boyfriend a lot too. He doesn’t know the guys name or what he even looks like, but he knows you wouldn’t just go for anyone. Late at night he stays up and thinks about all the things you’re doing with your new boyfriend that you did with him and jealously building up in his heart. He thinks about the way he used to make you smile and laugh and wonders if your new boyfriend is doing the same. He thinks about if he’s holding you at night, touching you, kissing you. Toji thinks about a lot of things, but the main thing that sits at the back of his mind is does he know where your heart truly lies?

That night, Toji saw it in your eyes. You almost gave into him like you did many times before. He knows it’s wrong, but he wants you back so badly. He craves you so badly. He knows you like the back of his hand, and he knows that you think about him too. Whether that be in love or hate, he knows he’s still on your mind. It’s wrong for him to want you to himself, to want all of your attention after he’s tried to rid himself of it so many times by trying to find you in other women. He was wrong to think anyone could replace you.

He doesn’t care about the arguments, about the fights, you’ll both work on that. You could scream at him, hit him, call him names, and though it would hurt, he’d still love you as much as he did before. You were his woman.

“Dad, can we get mom some ice cream before you bring us back?” Megumi asked.

“Yeah, yeah, sure.” He pulled the money out of his pocket, handing it to him.

“I know her favorite! I wanna buy it!” Naya tried reaching for the money.

“You’re too little, Ny-ny!” Megumi walked away towards the front counter.

“Mmmm, so mean,” she whined, folding her arms across her chest.

“It’s okay, peanut, next time you can get mommy something else.” He pinched her cheek. “Now wipe that look off your face,” he laughed.

“Mommy, mommy!” You heard Naya’s voice as you unlocked the door. She stood there with a big grin, staring up at you. You bent kneeled to her height and she jumped in your arms. “Hi!”

“Hi, baby. Have fun?” You asked, standing up straight with her on your hip.

“I did, we got ice cream and I tried daddy’s favorite and now it’s my favorite!” She nodded.

“Oh, really?” You quirked a brow. “I thought your favorite was cookies and cream?”

“Not anymore.” She shook her head. “Now it’s chocolate fudge brownie.”

“Chocolate fudge brownie, wow, you are advancing your tastebuds, baby girl,” you chuckled, earning a giggle from her. “Go put your things away, okay?” You put her down as Megumi came walking up from the car, Toji behind him.

“Hi, mom.” He gave you the smallest smile.

“Hi, sweety.” You kissed the top of his head. “Who’s that for?” You asked, looking at the half melted ice cream in his hand.

“For you. I asked dad if I could get you one and he gave me the money. It’s your favorite,” he answered.

“Awe, thank you!” You gave him another kiss and hug. “Put it in the freezer for later.” He walked past you and into the house. “Thanks for the ice cream.” You cleared your throat, looking at Toji.

“Yeah, no problem,” he plainly responded. “I want to apologize for the other day. I stepped out of line.”

“It’s fine.” You pulled at the hem of your shirt, playing with the fabric. That feeling began to settle in again the longer you stayed out here with him—feeling like it was only you two in the world. Each stolen glance a showcase of your nervousness. You were thinking about what Kento had said, to take a chance and speak with him about finding a leveling plane for you two. You wanted you and Toji as parents to work out so bad, you were tired of past problems getting in the way of what came first, but at the same time you were afraid that it was going to end up how it always did. Wherever his head was at in this dynamic was different from where yours was. “Do you think we can talk?”

“About?” He stuffed his hands in his sweater pocket, cheeks red from the cold air.

“The kids. About us as parents. I want us to find a level playing field,” you explained.

“Only if we don’t have to do it in this cold,” he chuckled.

“Right,” you laughed along with him, “sorry, come in.” You walked back into the house with him following behind you. He shut the door, removing his coat. It felt like forever ago since the last time Toji was inside your house. “I’m just gonna get the kids ready for bed and then we can talk, okay?” You stood there only a few feet from him.

“Take your time, mama.” The nickname slipped out, another habit he was trying to break, but you didn’t seem to mind. He watched you walk away down the hall. Everything inside of him was screaming not to fuck it up this time, not to say something that would cause a war. It was about your kids, about you guys as parents, a conversation that was long overdue. Hopefully, it’ll show improvement in rebuilding your family.

series masterlist

tag list (comment to be added):

@sweetpo1son @lovebittenbyevans @ryumurin @he4rts444mi @cherrypieyourface @lemonintrovert01 @ladysi0 @avanly @chilichopsticks @tananaxx @akusrider @irlbungee @my-anime-garden @hnm-mika @antiholdinghandsclub @yharnam-prophet @crankyarchives @nnnancyr @kenqki @ebiharachan @dollcest @whoreforjjkmen @yoyio90 @jaegergirl @r0seandth0rns @blankwashed @ittomain1 @3rdmonday @5seos @weird0o0 @1-800-choke-that-ho @s-j320 @viisgrave @mayajadewrites @jhiyoon @fisherman-boat

[sourpeachsayshi]

You had more thoughts about big bro Choso??

I'm listening 🎤

⊱ ─── [ marathon ] ─── ⊰

·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ minors / ageless blogs / blank blogs - do not interact.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ tags: public (is it pseudo incest if yuji is asleep? and choso is his brother?); heavy petting; kissing; nipple play; dry humping; reader is yuji's best friend; choso is yuji's brother; non curse au; hooking up in secret; size kink

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ notes: nyx, my beloved. I initially was going to write something short, but decided to expand on this and I'm wrapping it up as a little gift to you <3

midnight rolls around, the living room glowing in blue light. yuji is on the floor, curled into a ball with his eyes shut as he snores quietly. the movie is still playing, you know it's the last one, but you've got another hour and thirty minute left and it only just started. usually you wouldn't be so conscious of the time, eventually falling asleep, but halfway through choso decided to join you both and you've been on the edge of your seat ever since.

he's so big. his strong, muscular legs taking up quite a bit of space on the humble sized sofa. you find yourself fidgeting with your outfit. tugging at the hem of your short dress as you adjust the straps of the top.

your cheeks are already warm, even though choso is innocently just watching the movie.

"you cold?" he asks, keeping his eye on the screen but picking up on your restless movements.

"yes," you lie. it's actually quite nice - neither too hot or cold, but you figure you would feel less exposed under a blanket.

choso gets up and walks over to the other side of the room. he picks up two blankets, one which he spreads over yuji's body and the other which unfolds over your lap.

"thank you," you softly answer, snuggling underneath to conceal yourself.

"no problem," he nonchalantly replies, but your body shivers when you notice that he sits even closer to you.

you try to watch the movie, tell yourself not to think about what happened a couple of weeks ago in choso's room. you nip at your bottom lip, your belly fluttering with guilt. you swore it would be the last time. you can't keep lying to your best friend like this. hate that you've been showing up at his place more often under false pretenses.

"comfy?" a deep voice whispers against your ear, and you squeeze your thighs underneath the blanket as you swallow the lump in your throat.

a breathy response comes out of you. "yeah, I am"

"good," he answers back, his fingers moving to unravel the blanket even more. "make some room for me then, I'm starting to feel the cold too.."

another lie. but a lie that makes your heart quiver with anticipation.

silence lingers, the two of you keeping your eyes on the television screen. you glance in his direction, wetting your lips at his handsome features. his hair is out, flowing freely to his shoulders, with some of the layers pulled into a half up do. his exposed ears show off his silver jewelry, and you notice a new piercing on his helix. his dark brows frame his perpetually exhausted eyes, his jaw tight and his mouth in a firm line.

he turns towards you just as you quickly glare at the screen pretending like you weren't just gawking in his direction.

choso leans closer, intruding into your space. "this movie sucks"

"it's only slow in the beginning," you insist, "it gets better towards the middle..."

his touch is warm, it makes your thigh tingle when he places his palm over your exposed flesh.

he strokes his thumb back and forth across your skin, "does it?"

"you should pay attention," you murmur, your legs spreading on their own accord, your face finally turning to his. he's so close that your noses bump, and you look at him with sparkling eyes. "the details are really important..."

"are they?" he answers back with a slight grin, teasing you as always. his shy, introverted personality tucked away somewhere else.

your heart pounds in your chest, your attention quickly moving to yuji who is still asleep on the floor.

"I can't seem to pay attention when you've been walking around the place in this little thing all day," choso adds on, stealing your focus once more.

the heat blooms in every space that makes a pulse. you know it's been a distraction, that was the whole point of you wearing it. the top fits a little too snug, your breasts pushed up and on the cusp of spilling out. the hem was a dangerous length, and you are far too ashamed to admit it was for the purpose of easy access.

his hand trails upward, the pads of his fingers delicately tracing a path up along your inner thigh. you gasp lightly against his lips, an electric spark running up the base of your spine when you feel him press his index finger against your underwear.

"what's got you so wet?" he purrs into your mouth, his bottom lip grazing over your own.

your eyes shoot to yuji again, your anxiety out on full force.

you place one hand on his shoulder in an attempt to pull yourself out of this precarious position, but choso simply slips his free arm behind your waist and tucks you into his frame. he kisses the corner of your mouth, his affection traveling to the sweet spot against your neck.

you swallow a whimper, his mouth hot and wet against your flesh. "choso-" you whine as quietly as possible, "your brother is right there-"

his lips find yours, he silences your warning with a kiss. his thumb traces the slit of your clothed cunt, his other hand slithering upward to squeeze your left breast.

"he can sleep through a earthquake," he replies nonchalantly. "we're fine"

you know it's true, but it still feels so...inappropriate.

your hand moves to hold his jaw, your body melting into his weight while you both make out on the sofa. he arches forward, keeping your back resting against the arm chair, the blanket falling to your lap and exposing your upper body. he removes his hand from between your legs, and hooks his index finger around the straps of your dress.

he pulls them down, drags the fabric further to reveal the deep swells of your breasts. a moan leaves you when he finally releases you from his kiss, your spit slick lips panting to catch your breath. he pecks your neck, the indentations around your collar bones, and further down. his greedy hands pull at your dress, just low enough that your hardened nipples are exposed. he uses both thumbs to massage the tender buds, a satisfied expression highlighting his face.

"I knew you weren't wearing a fucking bra" he smugly states.

your head falls back against the arm rest, your body tingling with pleasure from him tweaking and rolling your nipples. you shift your head to check on yuji again, your stomach twisting into a knot out of guilt.

before you can let yourself spiral into the depravity of your sin, choso glides his tongue over one of your nipples to silence your thoughts. the blanket is barely covering you both, the hem of your dress hiked up as your body slowly becomes horizontal.

the movie plays, a scene of passionate dialogue ensuing among the characters while you and choso make out heavily on the sofa. the music carries, a sudden boom from the bass making you both freeze. you both turn to yuji, noticing him shift onto his back still heavy with sleep.

you tremble underneath choso, gazing at him with frightened eyes.

"I can't-" you insist with a shake of your head, while he sighs against your neck.

your both in this position for a seconds, until he murmurs an "okay".

before you know it he's picking you up like you’re featherlight, maneuvering your disheveled state until he has you situated on his lap. large hands find your hips, and he drags you back until you can feel his length press up against your ass.

"relax," he whispers again, his teeth nipping at your delicate lobe. "you keep watching the movie..."

you find yourself obliging as you mold into his chest, your breasts heaving when you breath heavily as he grabs one of your tits in his hand to knead at your pebbled nipple. his other hand finds your soaked underwear once more, and presses the cloth between your lips as he massages the folds.

your vision is blurry, the blue light morphing the colors and the shapes all around you. you brain is a fuzzy thing, lobes made of cotton that's slowly being plucked.

choso kisses your shoulder, his hip bucking slightly to add some friction against his cock.

"turn around"

"but-" you stutter, your back slightly arching when he pinches your nipple.

"it'll be quick, just turn around and face me..." he firmly dictates, and you're so horny at this point that you simply just oblige with frustration.

he keeps the blanket in place as you spin, straddling him properly with your arms locked around his neck.

"lay on me," he adds soft, holding you in a gentle embrace as he hides both of you underneath the blanket.

you sigh dreamily feeling the brush of his cock against your cunt, choso's hands grip onto the plush meat of your ass, and you both instantly start grinding against one another for some much needed relief. his soft tee adds friction to your chest, your nipples brushing over his hard torso. your fingers sink into the locks of his hair, your thighs spreading further as you move with a little more conviction.

"shit-" he groans, lightly tapping your ass to egg you on. "oh shit, that feels good..."

you raise yourself up slightly, forgetting for a moment that you both aren't alone. you look down at where your sexes meet, watching yourself slide back and forth over the imprint of his cock. choso stares at your pussy with concentration, one hand traveling to slip an index finger underneath the fabric. he tugs it to the side, giving you better access. you're trembling, your arousal coating the light material of his sweatpants.

choso is bucking his hips subtly, the sound of the sofa creaks mildly. his eyes fall to your chest, the dress resting just under your nipples, your body glistens as a mist of sweat glitters your skin.

your thighs quiver, a ghost of a whine muted by the television screen when your stomach flutters as you reach your orgasm. choso moans, his head falling back to the sofa when he cums, tainting his sweats with a large, noticeable stain.

the heat of the moment dwindles fast for you, and you quickly glance over your shoulder to make sure that yuji is still asleep.

choso's fingers find your chin, turning you back to face him as he lowers you to his lips. "told you nothing wakes him up," he reassures.

"we can't keep doing this," you add with a shake of your head.

"you say this every time," he notes, helping you as he readjusts the straps of your dress.

"we...we went a bit too far..."

"too far is me fucking you, sweetheart..."

you gaze at him with frustration as you slither off his lap, tugging the blanket over you as shame burns your skin. you try to readjust your position, licking your lips only to find that you can still taste him on your tongue. but then he shifts, his mouth against your ear once more.

"and we haven't done that...yet."

[redwing4life]

Shadows

CHAPTER 2 | ASHES TO EMBERS

PAIRING: Firefighter!Neighbor!Bucky x Fem!Reader

WARNINGS: Fluff, talk about night terrors, ALPINEEE, reader continues to be oblivious, bucky being a flirt

SUMMARY: After yesterday’s elevator fiasco, you’re left with the guilt of overstepping in Bucky’s business. He could barely look at you when you went to the firehouse to thank the crew, so it’s fair to say you’re surprised when he turns up at the cafe you work at.

WORD COUNT: 3813

PREVIOUS CHAPTER // NEXT CHAPTER

5 months ago…

Rain patters against your windows, dancing with other fallen drops as they race to the bottom. You’ve always found downpours to be comforting and tonight is no different.

The fan of your laptop whirrs along to the sounds of the movie you’ve been waiting to watch for weeks, only now getting the chance to after spending most of your time at the cafe, helping with renovations.

Surrounded by soft pillows that muffle your giggles, you reach for your phone to check the time. 01:54. Since when was it that late?

You reach to put your phone back, deciding to finish your film before calling it a night, when you hear a muffled yell. Slamming the space bar to pause the movie, you sit up in your bed adorned with a frown.

The silence that greets you leaves you questioning if you made it up. You clench your eyes shut, as though you’re blinking away your delusions, when a guttural cry travels through the thin walls of your apartment, tightening your muscles into a flinch that snaps your eyes wide open.

Your blood runs cold at the sheer terror laced within the following whimpers, adrenaline sending your mind into overdrive. Thoughts run rampant, dragging you through all the possibilities you can think of as you slowly piece together enough to understand what’s happening.

Your new neighbour, James. The firefighter. It’s his screams flooding your home.

Worry consumes you, sending you throwing the sheets off your body before you clamber out of bed. The hardwood floor is cool beneath your feet as you rush to your kitchen to grab your keys. You don’t even bother to put shoes on, hurried by the growing volume of James’ shouts.

You make quick work of unlocking your front door and ignore the voice in your head telling you it’s none of your business. You’d be damned if you don’t check on him, no matter how little you know him.

Raising your fist, you knock on the dark oak door of your neighbor’s apartment and pray he answers unharmed.

“James?!” You call through the door, not caring if you disrupt anyone else in the building.

With several more knocks, the muffled screaming comes to a halt and a small wave of relief washes through you.

You listen intently for any sign of the firefighter. “James?” Your voice is a little quieter now that you don’t need to shout over his bellows. You raise your hand to knock once more when the door suddenly opens.

Bucky Barnes stands before you in just a pair of shorts, sweat pooling above his brow line. Drops run down the valley of his chest, following the trail down to his abs. His chest is heaving up and down, up and down, lungs guzzling oxygen as though he’s been underwater for hours.

“God, James- I- are you okay?” Your eyes study the man in front of you, scanning every inch of his face with a worry that Bucky’s never seen from a stranger before.

“Fuck, y/n, I’m sorry” He shakes his head, “I- I just had a nightmare, I didn’t realise I’d been screaming.”

Shame tugs at his features, a frown nestled between his brows that you find yourself wanting to trace - to run your fingers over his cheeks till his heart stops beating so fast.

“It’s okay, really. I was worried, I didn’t know if you were hurt or...” Your words trail off, gaze falling to your feet as a light blush creeps up your neck.

You suddenly realise you’re wearing a tank top and shorts, hardly appropriate attire for a midnight conversation with your next door neighbour. One you may or may not have a school girl crush on.

“I’m okay,” Bucky rubs the back of his neck nervously, “I really am sorry for disturbing you, it won’t happen again.”

The desire to comfort him and tell him that it’s okay for him to have problems is clawing at your heart, but you remind yourself that living next door to him doesn’t mean you have the right to impose yourself on his life.

“You don’t need to apologise, James. I was still awake so it didn’t bother me, i’m just glad you’re alright.”

Your confession almost makes your neighbour blush. He wipes the sweat soaked hair from his forehead and smiles at you, but you see the way it doesn’t quite reach his eyes.

“Thanks for checking on me, doll.” God, will you ever not swoon at that name? “I hope you sleep well”

Eyes raking over your frame one final time, Bucky reaches behind him ready to shut the door.

“You too, Barnes. Goodnight.”

“Night, sweets.”

Present day…

A dull ache ripples through your shoulders as you carry the final bag of coffee beans to the storage room. Soft jazz plays from the radio on the counter and you hum along, accompanied by the scuff of your trainers on the tiles.

It feels like a lifetime has passed since this morning when you dropped off some cakes at the firehouse to thank the crew for yesterday. They were more than happy to take them off your hands, though one particular firefighter didn’t pay you so much as a glance.

You and Bucky have yet to speak about the events of the elevator; guilt has followed you like a lost puppy, a constant reminder of your colossal fuck up.

While you understand why Bucky is being cold to you, it hurt when he avoided you like the plague this morning. Against your best efforts, Steve saw how your eyes kept wandering back to your neighbour, offering a sympathetic smile when you returned your attention to him.

You did get to meet the crew properly which was lovely. Sam, who clearly has a knack for annoying Bucky, told you all about how he beat him in their physical exam last week. You longed to hear Bucky’s laugh at Sam’s remarks but were forced to settle for his silence.

After leaving the firehouse, you vowed to forget about your neighbour for the day, focus on work and not let your thoughts run you into the ground, yet here you are, daydreaming about him as you’re surrounded by flour and coffee beans.

The cafe is bathed in the orange and pink glows of sunset when you return from the storage room; emerald leather booths reflecting the few remaining beams of sunlight. It took you and your boss a week to build those damn things, but a satisfied grin settles on your lips at the sight of them.

“My back hurts just looking at ‘em.” Your boss, Sophie, chuckles from her armchair in the corner.

“I don’t think mine ever stopped!” You laugh.

It’s your usual closing routine; Sophie does the paperwork while you tidy up. Although you do work for her, the pair of you are good friends and you enjoy the quiet evenings talking nonsense as you wrap up for the night.

“How’s things with the hot firefighter next door?” She asks.

A scoff escapes you, “He won’t even look at me after yesterday.”

“What? I thought getting stuck in a lift with you would be heaven for him!”

Sending an incredulous look her way, you let your hair down from its messy bun. “You’re hilarious.”

Sophie rolls her eyes. “How is it that you get the hot firefighter pining over you and you can’t even see it?”

“Pining?” You shake your head, “Soph, we barely talk!”

“Then why is about today walk into my cafe?”

You barely get chance to process her words when the bell rings and a rush of cool air sweeps the room. You spin on your heel, faced with the man himself.

“James?” Your brows furrow, mouth ajar.

Bucky waves awkwardly. “Hey, doll.”

“What- Um… what are you doing here? We closed at six.” Words stumble over each other as you try to string a sentence together. Your heart, as usual, thuds like thunder in his presence.

“I came for you.” Bucky’s eyes bore into you, a hopeful expression on his features. “I thought m-maybe I could give you a lift home and- and we could talk?”

You hold his gaze, watching intently as he tilts his head slightly; it’s painfully silent while you endure a battle of your heart and your brain.

Your brain pleads with you to say no. To remember that nothing good could come of this and to spare yourself the embarrassment of being told to leave him alone.

Your heart, however? Well, your heart has already taken off your apron and walked out to his car.

“Okay,” You nod once. “I’ll be out in five.”

Awkward silence envelopes Bucky’s old beat-up four-by-four. The worn leather scratches the skin of your palms that have yet to leave your sides, ready to bolt at any moment.

Heat trickles up your neck with every stolen glance from Bucky and though he’s desperate to finally meet those pretty eyes, you’ve not raised them from your lap since you hopped in five minutes ago.

The firefighter clears his throat, “How was work?”

“Busy” You reply, biting your cheek lightly. “How was yours?”

A sigh rolls out from the drivers seat and he runs a hand through his hair. “It was a calmer shift, for once.” A content smile settles on his lips.

“No trapped elevators today?” You raise a brow, stealing the quickest of glimpses at your neighbour. Who could blame you when he’s running his hand through his hair like that? God, you’ve always wanted to do that.

Bucky laughs. “Not today. Think i’ve had my fair share for a little while!”

You breathe a laugh and Bucky’s grin widens, finding it hard to focus on the road when you’re sat looking so beautiful in his passenger seat.

The car rolls up to a red light before you start playing with your fingers.

“I’m so sor-“ “I need t-“

Your voices blend together as you begin speaking at the same time, drawing a nervous giggle from you.

“You go,” your cheeks burn crimson.

Bucky takes a shaky breath, eyes now trained on the road. “I need you to know that yesterday wasn’t your fault.”

Small tendrils of hair fall into your face when you tilt your head to the left. “No, James, I shouldn’t ha-“

Words die on your tongue as Bucky places his warm hand on your thigh; you try to focus on his voice and not how his hand is spread so fucking far across your jean-clad legs.

“Please, doll, let me say this, I- I need to say this.”

The sheer vulnerability that ripples from the base of his throat makes you want your heart to stop beating so loud, just so he’d have all the silence he needs.

“I’ve never been one to solve my problems, I just deal with them. I get on with life with this huge fucking shadow over me and, god, I dunno, I resign myself to a life in the shade.”

Bucky scoffs. “You were the first person to see it… the shade, I mean.”

It’s like your ribcage is turning to lead, heart heavy knowing he’s talking about his nightmares.

“After you came to check on me that night, it was like a weight was lifted from my shoulders. And that was enough to stop them back then.”

Absentmindedly, his fingers roll beneath his knuckles, fist tightly clenched on your lap. “But the dreams came back and that weight came back and it was heavier than before.”

“It was like a knife to the stomach when you brought it up yesterday because I finally had to admit that I never got over my problems, i’ve just been existing with them. Knowing that you knew of my shadows wasn’t enough anymore and I took it out on you and I’m so fucking sorry, doll.”

Bucky’s breath hitches in his throat when you reach your right hand to rest on the one on your thigh. The sparks beneath your touch beg him to look at you; blue eyes meet yours, swarming with an emotion you can’t quite figure out. With your hand still laying on his, you drag your left one up and down his forearm, tracing the veins and the valleys like its second nature.

It doesn’t evade either of you that it feels so right to have your hands on him, for you to comfort him this way.

His name falls from your lips and Bucky’s stomach flutters. He loves that you’re the only person who calls him James, though he knows it’s only because you don’t know to call him Bucky.

“James,” You say again, eyes flitting to the road briefly, “the lights are green”

Oh. He thinks, biting back a frown as he turns back to the road and is forced to pull his arm away to release the hand break. But your eyes never leave his face, not once.

Not when some dumb fuck cuts across the road and Bucky has to slam on the brakes. Not when you turn down the street of your apartment. Not even when the car comes to a halt and he kills the engine.

The heat of your gaze has the firefighter’s heart racing, far too aware of your silence. He steals a glance of you at the corner of his eye and can’t bear to feel so naked before you; he turns away and goes to pull the door handle when he feels a hand wrap firmly around his bicep.

“James, wait” You plead, squeezing his arm slightly. “I didn’t get my turn to talk.”

Reluctantly, Bucky eases back into his seat, his body rigid with apprehension. He utters an apology and you take a deep breath.

“Every single night that I heard you screaming, I’ve wanted to go running to your door, just like that first time.”

A sad smile tugs at your lips as you release your grip on his arm. “I hate knowing you’re on the other side of the wall, so hurt that even sleep can’t hide your pain.”

You watch his eyes clench shut while you talk. “Yesterday, in the lift, I couldn’t hold it in anymore, I had to bring it up. It was selfish, really. It became so unbearable pretending that I don’t hear you at night that I confronted you without care of what that might to do you. I brought it up when you weren’t expecting it and that’s on me. I’m sorry, James.”

Bucky shakes his head lightly, going to argue but you continue. “I know you’re sorry for being cold, and you don’t need to be. I understood why you shut down, even if it hurt.”

“I’m still sorry, though” He admits, “I shouldn’t have said such harsh things.”

“And I shouldn’t have acted like I know everything. I don’t.”

You both share a laugh, the air in the truck lightening at your confessions. Those bright blue eyes fall to your lips, a relieved smile left from your giggles.

“Hey,” He breathes, eyes hopeful, “do you- do you wanna come meet Alpine?”

Bucky’s heart melts at the way your grin widens at his question.

You nod vigorously, “Yes, I would love that.”

James Bucky Barnes’ apartment is not what you expected.

When you step inside, warmth greets you with haste. Soft lamps illuminate the room from various corners; the light bounces off the few plants and various decorations while the long windows on the far wall begin to reflect the light as night falls.

“Do you want a drink?” Bucky asks, stepping around you when you still in the middle of the open plan room, a mirrored layout to your own.

“What’ve you got?” Your eyes wander up and down his frame as he walks to the kitchen, pausing at the rippled muscles of his toned back. He’s still in his work gear; a navy blue station t shirt, dark grey utility pants and heavy black boots. And as always, he looks thigh-clenchingly good.

“Uhh, I’ve got some beer, coke, water,” His head peeks out from behind the fridge door, “or I have some coffee or hot cocoa?”

You gasp playfully, “You got hot cocoa?”

Bucky raises an amused brow, a grin toying his lips. “You want one?”

Your hair slips from behind your ear as you nod and shuffle your way to the kitchen. Butterflies swarm your stomach at the sight of Bucky tinkering away with your drinks, his back to you as he works. Thoughts of a life with him as your boyfriend flash through your mind but you shake them away.

Spinning around, you scan the apartment for any sign of Alpine, only to come up short. When Bucky notices your searching eyes, he pulls a stool out from beneath the little island and stretches a hand out to you.

“Climb up, doll.” He grins.

“What?” Confusion laced within your voice, much to your neighbours amusement.

He jerks his head toward the refrigerator, or more specifically, above it. Curiosity fuels your movements and you take Bucky’s hand, helping you up onto the stool. Ignoring the adoring gaze from the firefighter, you look to see the infamous white cat, curled up in a ball above the fridge.

“Aww” You coo, catching the cat’s attention. She pushes herself up onto her paws and tentatively walks to the edge to get a closer look of you.

Bucky watches closely, “She loves it up there, dunno why” He helps you down from the stool when Alpine climbs down onto the counter.

“You’ve got a good little hiding place, huh?” Her fur is soft beneath your fingers as you stroke her head, lightly scratching behind her ears. She nestles into your palm and purrs, eyes closing at your attention.

“You were quite the hot topic at the station today, ya know?” The firefighter says, throwing a cheeky glance over his shoulder when he returns to making your drinks.

“Oh, really?” You walk back to the small breakfast bar and lean against it on your elbows, head tilted in curiosity. Alpine scurries away to the couch now that your focus is on Bucky.

“Yep, some of the guys talked about ya all day.” A blush creeps up your neck, much like it always does in Bucky’s presence. “It’s not often we get a pretty woman come in with the best cakes in town.”

You didn’t think it was possible, but your cheeks only grow hotter at his words. Pretty woman, huh?

Bucky turns back to face you and places two cups of hot cocoa on the counter.

“You don’t get thank you cookies?” An innocent frown pulls your brows together and Bucky swoons.

“Oh, we do!” He smirks, “Just not always from pretty women.”

Oh dear lord, help me.

Your neighbor pushes a mug closer to you and continues, “And they’re not always the best cookies.”

A snort of a laugh escapes you as you wrap your hands around the cup, “Well i’ll tell my boss you liked ‘em.”

It’s hard to describe the way you feel in this moment. It’s both familiar, yet exhilaratingly new; Bucky, the apartment, Alpine, the steaming mugs of hot cocoa, it’s all so peaceful. You feel whole in his presence, as though the missing piece of the enigmatic puzzle of your life has been filled.

Conversation flows for hours, the sky turning dark outside the tall windows, though you barely notice - too invested in your neighbour and the discussions you share.

The more you learn about him, the more you see him becoming a part of your life. If Bucky’s doting eyes are anything to go by, then you can guess he feels the same.

The buzz from your phone vibrates across the countertop, dropping you back into reality.

“Jeez,” you mumble, “it’s nearly ten.”

Bucky chuckles, “We have been talking for a while, sweets.”

You hum in response, reading the text from Sophie.

‘How’d things go with the hot firefighter?’

Praying said hot firefighter can’t see the text himself, you quickly turn off you phone and place it back down.

“I- um” You stutter, distracted by the sight before you; Bucky stretching his arms up behind his head, revealing a slim stretch of skin beneath his shirt. Eyes wide at the dip of his adonis’ belt and the glimpse of a happy trail, you scramble to regain your composure. “I should start heading home, James.”

When he shakes his head and breathes a laugh, you frown, “What?”

“You’re the only person who still calls me James.” He confesses.

“Well what else would I call you?” You ask.

“My friends call me Bucky.”

You smile to yourself. “Bucky…” You test it out, oblivious to the hitch in his breath when you say his name. “Would you like me to call you Bucky?”

Your question poses more of a challenge than you expected and the firefighter places his hands on his hips, adorned with a frown.

“You’re welcome to call me either, but i’d rather you choose.” He says.

“Oh, that’s a lot of power, Barnes” Your grin widens, a mischievous glint in your eyes.

He scoffs playfully, “James or Bucky, doll, I’m not giving you free rein. So which is it?”

Pushing yourself off the breakfast bar, you step backwards and look around the apartment before turning back to your neighbour. “You’ll have to wait and see”

Before you know it, Bucky is stood right in front of you, his chest mere inches from yours, his breath fanning across your cheeks as he looks down at you.

“Oh, really?” He cocks his head, eyes pinning you to the ground.

You fight the urge to gulp at the close proximity; your heart is racing and mouth slightly ajar.

“Mhmm” You nod slowly, finding your feet in this new dynamic. Bringing a hand to his chest, you tap against it twice. “Gives you a reason to invite me over again.”

Bucky revels in the feeling of your hand on his body, desperate for more. He doesn’t even care if you can feel how his heart is beating as fast as yours, too lost in the moment to give a shit.

“I don’t need a reason to invite you over, doll”

Sweet Jesus.

After a moment too long, Bucky escorts you to the door. You give Alpine a quick head scratch on the way.

“I’ll see you in the morning?” The firefighter asks as you walk to your apartment down the hall, leaning against his door frame.

“You know it!” You reach you door and turn to grin at him.

“Don’t forget to set your alarm, sweets” He teases, drawing an eye roll from you, and steps back into his apartment before closing the door.

Following suit, you rest your back against the wood and throw your head back. What a fucking day.

NEXT CHAPTER

a/n: second chapter done and released a day early ;) hope you enjoyed it, the end is a little rushed but i’m happy with it. as always, my dms and asks are open if anyone has any questions or suggestions for this fic or any other fic ideas. love, red <3

comment if you’d like to be added to the ashes to embers taglist 🧡

taglist: @armystay89 @rabbitrabbit12321 @mishkatelwarriorgoddess @harrystylesandthegoobs @zannemes @noonespecial90 @pank0w @blackbirdwitch22 @wintrsoldrluvr @pingpongfingfong @belleofthebooks @larienjenova @chaosbarelycontained

[hanafubukki]

Can be seen as a part 2 to this fic

You were avoiding Lilia.

Ever since the Malleus overblot, you had tried your best to stay away from Lilia.

It helped that everyone was busy dealing with the aftermath. In addition, the four from diasomnia that caused all this needed time to heal and deal with their relationships.

It didn't mean that you didn't see them on campus, but you had a group of first years who would negate anyone that made you uncomfortable.

And that turned out to be Lilia in this case, though this was all thoughts they assumed and not confirmed by you.

But it did let you run away.

Surprisingly, even Sebek helped. He had mentioned he did not agree with your methods in the dream world, but you had helped him and those he cared about. He said that he would help until you were comfortable to talk with them, with him.

You don't know if you would ever be ready to talk to Lilia.

To confess your thoughts and your feelings. To be vulnerable in such a way.

But you knew you would have to be.

It is during these moments when I’m glad I don’t have magic and I can’t overblot.

You knew eventually you would have to talk to him.

Maybe that’s why you had worn your comfiest clothes, and taken a blanket with you to watch the stars outside today of all days.

A feeling called you outside.

“Couldn’t sleep, YN?”

“Hmm…you could say that. How’s the boys?”

“They are recovering, many feelings are being expressed.”

“Family communicating? Working? Wow, who would have thought?”

Lilia laughed as he settled next to you.

“Should you be speaking?”

“I have no idea what you are talking about.”

“The cliff?”

“Maybe I was feeling jump-OW!”

You rubbed your cheek as Lilia smiles at you, the hint of danger in his eyes had you shutting up real quick.

“I just wanted to wake you…without unneeded heartbreak.”

“Yet you believed your actions wouldn’t cause any?”

You couldn’t meet his eyes.

You remembered how Grim scrambled to you, crying and calling your name.

You remember shocked faces, guilt, and tears.

You remembered Malleus and how he looked somehow even paler than when he put you all to sleep. How magic circled around him uncertainly.

You knew you hurt them, but at least they were awake you reasoned to yourself.

At least, they were able to stop Malleus.

You couldn’t bring yourself to apologize.

Finally, finally, you were able to do something.

Finally, you were able to help.

You weren’t stuck on the sides, watching helplessly.

You heard a hum from next to you.

“Taking such heartbreaking actions. And for what? A foolish crush?”

That had your attention. It had you turning, heated.

“Its more than a crus-”

You abruptly stopped yourself.

The look in Lilia’s eyes spoke of the hunter catching his prey.

He brought up his hand, tilting your chin up towards him. The look in his eyes has you slightly shaking.

Anticipation? Excitement? You couldn’t tell.

“My dearest, faes love intensely. I won’t ever let you go. If you wish to be free, speak now or forever hold your peace.”

“I love you. Who said I wanted to be free?” You finally spoke the words you were afraid to say before.

The glowing magenta eyes were the last you saw until you were enveloped in warmth.

Bonus:

“Let me go!”

You tried to leave Lilia’s room to attend class but he was literally holding you down with all his strength.

While his bed was comfy and you wouldn’t mind sleeping more, you had class!

“I can’t miss class! We have potions today! Grim might burn the school down!”

“I told you I wouldn’t let you go khee hee hee.”

Silver, Sebek, and Malleus watched as you struggled against a clingy Lilia.

“Why not join their class, Lilia? Would that not be the obvious choice?”

“Tsunotaro, no!”

“Human, you should know better than to take deals made with fae lightly!”

Silver smiled, his family was complete and whole again.

They were healing.

He felt the love for those around him increase.

And it seems, his family had a new addition as well.

[propertyofwicked]

WORKPLACE PREDICAMENT - LN

part 2 to homesick <3 (potentially a part 3 incoming?)

warnings - none, just heavy on the angst, hurt/comfort and a cheeky bit of fluff

masterlist

the sun rose late, light shining through the window, illuminating the empty white walls. y/n scrunched her eyes up, the sun too bright, as she kicked herself for not shutting her curtains when she went to bed the night before. it took a moment for her to even realise she was laying on her sofa, the chair so new and unused that the fabric was stiff, uncomfortable, and digging in her side. she pushed her body upright, her eyes searching for her phone as her mind ran over the events of last night.

she’d fallen asleep in the offices, lando had driven her home, and sat with her till she fell asleep. no, she thought, shaking her head - he held her till she fell asleep. and if she digs deeper in her memories, the feeling of his lips pressing a soft kiss to her head as he whispered goodnight plagues her brain, pulling at her emotions. she’d promised not to let her school girl crush on a colleague get out of hand, but when they kiss your head and hold you till you fall asleep - what else is a girl supposed to do?

y/n didn’t dare to imagine the HR nightmare this could be if she allowed the situation to develop, so much so that she sighed in relief that she had to following week booked off to allow her to move in and settle in the new flat.

lando, however, was panicking.

he’d awoken several hours before her, the jet lag complicating his sleep schedule. he wasn’t sure how long he’d spent staring down at her sleeping form, legs curled up into her chest as her head rested on his lap. his fingers played with strands of her hair, tucking them behind her ears as he fought back the urge to bend down and kiss her again.

their close friendship was inevitable, everyone thought so. their personalities complimented each other well, the two of them could always be found giggling about something together. however, it was only in this moment that lando realised his need to be near her, his calm nature when she was present at his races or the urge he felt to always make sure she was alright was more than friendship. he wanted to know everything about her, her favourite colour, what she was allergic to, how she got that scar on her knee.

the reason he felt an overwhelming urge to care for y/n the previous night, and the strong desire he felt to do it every night became clearer and clearer with every corner lando turned on his way to the mclaren offices. he had a strong feeling it was the same reason he felt ridden with guilt when he prised her arms from him this morning, holding her head gently before lowering on to the sofa as he snuck out of her flat.

lando norris had a crush. a HR violating crush, that could destroy her entire career if he acted on it.

as he walked into the offices, he found himself face to face with oscar, who looked him up and down for a moment, deep in thought, before returning back to his face, eyes widening in realisation. until that very moment, lando had forgotten about the reason he had even been in the offices at 3am that morning, the events of the night returning to his mind. he hadn’t been home in between, he was wearing the same outfit oscar had seen him in mere 5 hours before, however his clothes now had y/n’s vanilla perfume embedded in the fibres.

lando shook his head at him, pleading for the australian to stay silent. his eyes darted around, looking for an empty side room, before nodding his team mate in that direction, silently telling him to follow him.

“so…” oscar started, closing the door quietly behind him, “how is she?”

“she’s… good?” lando replied, unsure where to start.

“and you’re in the same clothes because…?” oscar continued, leading the conversation for lando to fill in.

“i haven’t been home?” he replied wincing a little at how it sounds, “but nothing happened. she was upset, so we watched a film and she fell asleep on me.”

“right,” oscar nods, starting to understand. secretly, he’d always rooted for y/n and lando, noticing the connection between the two of them as many others had.

“she hates being alone,” lando added, still trying to justify himself, despite oscar never accusing him of anything, “the new flat, she hates it. too quiet, too lonely. she just needed someone there.”

“not someone, lando, you. she needed you there,” oscar replied, deciding to finally bring up the elephant in the room. lando didn’t respond, deciding to nod at his team mate whilst remaining deep in thought.

“and i wanted that. i liked that she needed me,” he said finally, looking up to see oscar’s face bearing a satisfied smile.

“what did she say to you when she woke up?” oscar asked, with genuine interest. lando grimaced again.

“she didn’t.”

“what do you mean she didn’t?” oscar asked, confusion written over his face until - “you left while she was asleep?”

“i needed to go to work and she just looked so peaceful and-” lando started, sighing deeply before his next statement, “and then i realised i wanted to see that every day. her waking up, getting ready, you know, like, domestic stuff. and then i realised i like her a lot more than i thought i did, and a lot more than HR would be happy about.”

“fuck HR,” oscar said, clapping his hands onto lando’s shoulders, “you like her mate, and i know she feels the same. do what makes you happy, worry about the consequences later.”

“she likes me back?” lando asked, smiling at the news, whilst choosing to ignore this new side of oscar who suddenly doesn’t think about consequences.

“everyone sees the way she looks at you. you could literally kill a puppy and she’d still look at you as if you hung the moon and stars.”

lando nodded at him, feeling the conversation come to a natural end as they left the room, starting up a new conversation about the meeting they had later that day.

lando decided he’d speak to her about it when she came in for her shift later, he started planning how he’d ask her to join him for dinner that evening, or maybe he’d invite her out for a late night drive. but his chance never arose, y/n never showed up.

and he didn’t see her in person till the following week. he had walked into the paddock, his mood still low when y/n still hadn’t been at the offices, or on the jet for the race weekend. he knew she was ok, as she had been interacting in their work associated group chats, all the while leaving his texts on delivered for hours, and only responding with the bare minimum when she did.

had he gone too far? he hadn’t meant to call her angel, he hadn’t meant to over insert himself in her life. did she know how he felt about her and it wasn’t mutual?

he’d spent the whole week beating himself up, believing he’d made her so uncomfortable that she’d gone MIA, and despite oscar’s reassurance, he couldn’t help but be miserable. but upon entering the mclaren hospitality centre, he heard her all too familiar laugh, his eyes immediately darting around the room till it settled on her frame. her hair was tied up in a low bun, keeping her hair from her eyes as she conversed with oscar.

he walked up to them slowly, anticipating a negative reaction from y/n, but once again found himself surprised when she turned and smiled at him.

“hey, we wondered where you’d got to,” she started, “i need to take a few pictures of you both in the garage for instagram. maybe a track walk video for stories?”

he nodded at her, dwelling on her almost professional tone. she was smiling, but there was no friendly teasing about how late he was, no jokes about his hair being a mess.

“just gimme 2 minutes to dump my bag and im all yours,” he replied, smiling at her again before locating his personal room.

im all yours ran through y/n’s brain like a mantra that day, it felt like her brain was bullying her, constantly reminding her that he was in fact, not all hers. she’d spent the week thinking of lando, and only him. how he speaks, how respectful he is, his charming nature, his curls. he would be the death of her, and she could never have him. ultimately, she decided that distancing herself would be the best course of action. keep it professional, keep it friendly, keep your job - she tried to remind herself every time she caught herself staring at him for longer than normal.

y/n wholeheartedly believed the rest of the weekend went well. she got her job done, remained professional and kept all her clothes on when lando stepped out of his car, sweating lightly and looking as if the gods had sculpted him.

lando wholeheartedly believed she was being insufferable and childish. she wouldn’t talk to him if it wasn’t work related, always managed to be ‘busy’ when he needed to talk, and spent more time talking to some of the engineers than she had ever spoken to them before. he was seething. he wasn’t annoyed at her, per say, more himself for letting it happen.

which is how he ended up outside her hotel room, knocking aggressively on her door 3 times before stepping back and fiddling with his fingers.

when she opened the door, lando stuttered saying hello, taken aback at the way her hair framed her face. she was wearing one of his old t-shirts he’d given her after a work christmas party - it hung low on her, almost covering the small cotton shorts she wore underneath. to him, she was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen.

“lando? what’s wrong?” she asked with genuine concern, her voice soft as her eyes widened at him. but for some reason, this angered him. how could she not know what was wrong?

“what’s wrong?” he repeated cruelly, watching as she flinched back at his anger, “you. you’re what’s wrong. why have you been ignoring me all week? i understand you were busy but not even a text back? and then, i see you in person and you act as if you hardly know me?”

he doesn’t know why he’s lashing out at her, it was as much his fault as it was hers.

“i had the week booked off,” she started explaining, noticing how lando’s face contorted from anger to guilt, “i booked it off so i had a week to move in to the flat and get settled. i didn’t text you ‘cos i was trying to move my stuff in, all whilst getting wifi installed and sorting out my bills?”

now, she was annoyed. she was giving him space, protecting herself from inevitable rejection. she knew she wasn’t being the best of friends, but that didn’t give him the right to turn up at her door and shout at her.

“and you couldn’t tell me that?” he argued back, “takes all of 20 seconds to put that in a text, y/n. i could’ve helped you move your stuff in. look, if i’ve done something to upset you, i’m gonna need you to tell me. ive been racking my brain for a week and not one thing is standing out to me.”

“look, lando. i’m sorry if you felt neglected, but i just needed to sort some things out. i’m here now, aren’t i? been here all weekend?”

“barely,” he snorted in response, anger still running through him.

“barely?” she questioned, “im right here? i did the track walk with you? i was in the media pen for your interviews? ive been here all weekend.”

“no, y/n, you haven’t. work y/n has been here, she’s been doing her job all week. my y/n is no where to be seen.”

her heart fluttered slightly, he claimed her as his own. she had to take a step back and remind herself that it meant nothing.

“i’m sorry lan,” she replied sadly, “i’m trying. i am. it’s just been rough recently.”

“i know, y/n,” he said, his tone softening for the first time in the whole conversation, “but im here for you. i want to be there for you when things get rough - why wont you just talk to me?”

she contemplated telling him the truth then and there, his sad eyes tempting her more and more every second she looked at them.

“i can’t talk to you about this lando. not right now,” she replied, pushing the door to close between the two of them. his foot stepped out, stopping the door from closing fully.

“y/n, i am in love with you. and i don’t know why or when it happened, but i am. and if that makes you uncomfortable, tell me to stop. but i want to be with you, i want to know your past, i want to be in your future. please, y/n, let’s just talk about this,” he pleaded, laying his heart out on the table for her to see.

“goodnight lando,” she said bluntly, slamming the door shut. lando stood still, his blood ran cold, his heart plummeting, and the hallway fell silent. he heard the lock turning on her door, and turned to leave. but then he heard it, he heard her sobs through the door, and the fabric of her t-shirt sliding against the door as she fell to the floor.

something told him to leave, but her door felt like a magnet, pulling him towards it, as he slid down to the floor resting against it. lando heard the way her breathing faltered, air getting caught in the back of her throat as she cried.

“y/n, i know you can hear me,” he started again, turning to speak to the door, “please, y/n. talk to me. what’s wrong? have i ruined this? ‘cos im more than happy to move on and pretend i didn’t say anything.”

he heard her sniff, taking a deep breath in as she did - he knew this was her attempt to regulate herself.

“i can’t lose this job, lando. i spent so long getting to where i am now - i can’t risk losing my job,” she said, her head in her hands and tears continued to spill.

“why would you lose your job over me loving you, y/n? that’s on me.”

“because i love you too,” she replied, defeated.

lando is pretty sure this is both the best and worst moment of his adult life. she loved him back, but she still sat on the floor of a hotel room, crying out to him from behind a locked door. he didn’t reply immediately. he understood her fears, he too had considered the impact on both of them if anything ever happened between the two.

“i love my job, lando. i love working with you, with oscar. hell i love everyone i work with. and i can’t put myself in a position of losing that all because i love you more than anyone else.”

oscar’s words ran through his mind on a loop - fuck HR, worry about the consequences later.

“y/n, please open the door.”

she said nothing, and his heart dropped once more, until he heard the click of the latch, and felt the door move from his back. he looked up at her once more, noticing that she still looked beautiful with puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks. he scrambled to his feet, taking the girl in a tight embrace as he walked the two of them into the room.

“i didn’t want to leave you that morning, you know.”

“i know,” she said, nodding into his shoulder.

“i just - i panicked, you know?”

she moved back, looking up at him confused - why was he panicking? mclaren were never going to sack their star driver over a workplace relationship.

“but then oscar said something that resonated with me.”

“you told oscar?”

“oscar knew before i did,” he said, shrugging, keeping his hands firmly on her waist.

“what did oscar say?”

“he said fuck HR. at the time, i didn’t see anything wrong with that. i knew you liked this job, but i was so ignorant to think you’d risk your career for me.”

“it’s not that i don’t want to, lan. im scared,” she replied, tears still rolling down her cheeks as her mind plagued with guilt.

“i know, angel,” he said, pressing a kiss to her forehead again, “i’m sorry for putting this on you. whatever you want to do next, i’m happy to do. if you want me to leave and never talk about this again, that’s fine.”

“i just need some time,” she said nervously, “i need some time to think. that’s not a no, it’s not a rejection. i just need some time.”

he nodded at her, not necessarily happy about the outcome, but happier than he had been all week.

“and that’s perfectly fine. you tell me when you’re ready and we go from there, ok?” he told her, raising a hand to push the hair out her face, before coming back to wipe away the stray tears on her cheek.

“do you want to stay?” she asked, pulling her hands away to twist her fingers around nervously, “we could watch a film?”

“i’d love nothing more,” he replied, smiling down at her.

he threw himself on her bed, as he always did, making sure he didn’t overstep her boundaries. this whole situation was new to the both of them.

“your hair looked shit this week, you need a trim,” she said randomly as she joined him on the bed, as if she’d been dwelling on it for a while. lando snorted, laughing at her abruptness.

“there we go, there’s the y/n i know - my y/n.”

[love-byers]

(warning: long)

we should talk more about mikes choice of words in the rink o mania fight, or rather the writers choice of words

"You basically sabotaged the whole day!!"

sabotage

in case you need a reminder of what sabotage means

deliberately destroy, damage, or obstruct

mike is not just saying will was being a douche for moping, rolling his eyes, and barely talking. he's saying wills a douche because he's doing it on purpose. not even just on purpose either, he's saying will planned this. will wanted to ruin the day. mike thinks will was out to get him by withholding his friendship. obviously will wasn't doing any of this, he just moped because he felt brushed off by mike and was ignored (or so he thought).

that kind of behavior, thinking the consequences of his own actions are a planned attack against him, is very consistent with the way he acted in s3 when el dumped him and he blamed it on max.

we can connect this directly to mike's apology where he calls himself a self-pitying idiot. the self-pity is mike allowing himself to believe it's not his fault that his day sucked, that it's not his fault will is acting this way. deep down he knows it's his own fault by purposefully brushing will off at the airport, but he was being so self-absorbed and self-pitying that he convinced himself it wasn't.

"why is this on me?? why am i the bad guy??"

so lets go through this again, inferring from mike's own words.

when will left hawkins, he felt weird. he'd just spent the whole summer trying to be grown up and acting like he didn't care about dnd anymore, shutting will down and really hurting him in the process, so he probably feels embarrassed that he now feels the exact opposite. he enjoyed spending time with max, lucas, and dustin but it just wasn't the same without will. he missed will so badly that the fact that will was barely reaching out got to his head, and he felt too insecure to find out for himself. he didn't know if will felt the same way or if he was doing fine without mike, making lots of new friends and enjoying life. he was afraid he'd lost will. then here comes el with her letters saying how life is awesome and they have lots of friends. mike probably thought, oh now i'm DEFINITELY not telling him how i feel. the letter about will potentially liking a girl was the final straw. wow. so he's occupied with some girl and thats why he won't talk to me. so now mikes determined to not give will an inkling of an idea that he's bothered or that he cares. psh, mike could care less. maybe when will sees that mike totally doesn't care he'll feel like he screwed up and he'll be super nice to compensate and win mike back.

so mike gets to lenora and hey, will, i totally don't care about seeing you, see how i dodged your hug? i don't care. then he sees the painting. maybe it's not for someone he likes, maybe it's for me. here you go will, opportunity one to win back my affection.

"Uh, what's that?"

"Um, it's nothing, it's just this painting I've been working on."

"Cool."

operation-act like i don't care: EEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR FAILED.

LOOK at his face bro. he looks heartbroken.

from here on mike just got more and more annoyed. will isn't trying to win him back, he isn't compensating for the months of silence. he's acting sad. he's acting sad? he has the audacity to act sad after he made all these friends and left me behind?? no, this is not my fault, this is not on me. it gets under his skin in a way he can't ignore. those feelings of guilt and annoyance that will is causing mixed with his months worth of self pity and convincing himself he's not the problem leads him to another thought. he's doing this on purpose. he's punishing me. this was his plan all along. he's trying to ruin my day for no reason, because i clearly didn't do anything to deserve this.

then angela shows up and humiliates el and mike, for some insane reason, uses this as an excuse to express his anger to will, even though it had literally nothing to do with will.

"You should've told me she was having trouble."

"Well, I didn't know they were gonna be here, Mike."

"Yeah, but you knew she was having trouble for like a year and didn't tell me."

in WHAT world is this will's fault?? he had absolutely no idea el was lying until that day. and mike is blaming him? no, he's really not, he just wants a reason to express his anger without having to admit why he's angry.

"Well, I didn't know she was lying to you."

"Is that why you decided to be a douche to her all day?"

her. he's hiding behind el's name. psh, what? i don't care that you weren't talking to me, it's because of el.

el just got publicly humiliated and mike thinks now is the time to get on will and act like el's biggest problem was will not talking to her?? no way. he just doesn't want will to know that these are his feelings.

"I wasn't being a douche!"

this completely sets mike off. how dare will act all innocent after what he did to me all day? any part of him that was trying to hide that will's behavior is bothering him has been completely overridden. will purposefully withholding his attention from mike has pissed him off soooooo badly that he can't keep it to himself anymore or hide behind el.

"You were! You were! You were rolling your eyes, you were moping, you were barely talking you basically sabotaged the whole day!"

yup, thats right will. i know exactly what you're doing and i'm calling you out on it.

"Well she was lying to you, Mike! Straight to your face ever since you got here! And...and I've been a total third wheel all day it's been miserable. So sorry if I wasn't...if i wasn't smiling."

third wheel? really?

"Yeah, whatever man."

"Well what about us?"

"What?"

i imagine this is where mike shits himself. i mean he literally stops in his tracks. will is directly addressing what he'd been trying to hide his care for the whole time, them. all of a sudden after all these months, he cares about us? and it's poking at that weird feeling he had, like he missed will too much. like he was feeling too much.

"What, you're mad that I didn't talk to you? Seems like you've made it super clear you're not interested in anything I have to say."

"That's just not true."

mike says that so fast it's like a knee-jerk reaction. of course he cares what will has to say. all he's wanted all day, and all this time for that matter, was for will to talk to him. and will is blaming him?

"You called maybe a couple times. It's been a year, Mike. Meanwhile El has like a book of letters from you."

now mike's defense is kicking in. he feels like will is directly picking at that feeling. the weirdness. the fact that he feels differently for will than the rest of his friends, even his girlfriend.

"That's because she's my girlfriend, Will!"

"And us?"

now the alarms are going off. he knows something. "us" for will in this moment is just their friendship. "us" for mike is something more, because that's what's been brewing in him the whole time they've been apart. internalized homophobia in 3..2..

"We're friends! We're. Friends."

"Well, we used to be best friends!"

oh. he was just talking about our friendship. i was tweaking a little bit. and...ouch. will just officially said they aren't best friends anymore. and he's blaming it on mike. but mikes defenses are still up high.

"Well...well maybe you should've reached out more, I don't know! But why is this on me? Why am I the bad guy?!"

then will is lost for words, and he just look sad. and as mad as mike is, he hates seeing will that way.

i imagine the day or two between this and his apology, mike went over this fight in his mind multiple times. and the more he thought about it, the more he realizes, ah shit. i was way too in my head and this was completely one sided. will wasn't plotting against me, i just felt so bad for myself i convinced myself i did nothing wrong. all this because i thought he found new friends and i felt bad for myself. and now i've lost my best friend and made him feel like all of it is his fault. i have to let him know it's all on me.

tldr: mike is weird and gay.

[billieshrry]

Every Move You Make • B.E.

Summary: read pt 1 and 2 first!

Warnings: smut finally, all the warnings from other parts apply here

You and Billie had never been better.

Honestly, your entire life had never been better. Billie protected you, drove you everywhere, bought you everything, taught you stuff you would’ve never thought to learn. She was truthfully so caring, honest, and loving.

You really wanted to be her girlfriend.

When you came to this realization, you felt a twinge of guilt. You never really had a “break up” with your ex; you had discussed it a few nights before he died. When he had found your journal and read what you had been thinking about the relationship, he didn’t react very well. So you really don’t have the closure of that ending, but my God do you like Billie.

Honestly, you already love her.

You won’t tell her that, you can’t, because you now how stupid you sound. You aren’t even dating yet, and it definitely hasn’t been long enough for the “L word” to be used, but it felt right. You knew her, you trusted her, and she took care of you.

You had never felt safer with someone. Billie kept you safe.

And honestly, beyond your knowledge, technically she did.

I mean, I guess she wasn’t protecting you from the murderer themself, but Billie wasn’t gonna hurt you. God, no. She’d never even think about it. Everything she did was for you. She breathed for you, at this point. She thought about you constantly. You consumed her.

At this point, you had practically moved in with her. You couldn’t stand being alone, especially with all of these people disappearing in your town. It scared you, Billie knew it did. She almost felt bad. Almost. But she also knew that what she was doing was for the best. It’s what you needed.

So she wouldn’t stop. Especially if she’s not getting caught. Where’s the fun in that?

You had only complained once or twice about many people; your pest of a boss, your next door neighbor who you had a feeling would watch you change, your bitch of a friend who complained about her stealing all of your attention. There wasn’t really much for her to work with.

But Billie was getting antsy. She craved action. She wasn’t crazy, but the feeling of holding someone’s heart, physically holding it in her hand, it was unmatched.

You sat on her lap while she scrolled aimlessly on her laptop at her desk. She was supposed to be working, but your back was arched just perfectly enough for your spine to divot into your skin, and your sleep tank did nothing to hide it. A pair of her boxers were loose and low on your waist, and the thin fabric was doing nothing to hide the heat that was radiating onto her thigh. She could feel every part of you.

You watched her screen, looking at her computer mouse go in circles. You knew you were distracting her, you weren’t that naive. What you didn’t know is how she would react. You guys had kissed, and sure it got heated sometimes, but she never let it go too far. You didn’t understand why, and you were too afraid to ask.

You wiggle your hips, making yourself a bit more comfortable, and you hear Billie take a sharp inhale. She pats your hip twice, signaling you to get up. You obey.

“Are you okay?” She can tell you sound worried, but you have no real reason to be. You could never make her mad. To her, you’re a God. A real life angel. Perfection.

“Yeah, yeah of course. Follow me?” She smirks at you, and you feel yourself go weak. You nod and stay hot on her tail, following her to wherever she goes. She leads you into her bedroom, somewhere you’ve been many times, especially within the past couple of weeks. Your sleepovers seemed to be every night, and most were at her house. You even brought your cats over to Billie’s house, and she bought all new things for them: toys, litter boxes, food and water bowls. They (and you) were in heaven.

When you walk into her room, Billie quietly goes behind you to shut the door. You take a deep breath in, smelling her scent that lingers on everything. She walks back in front of you, sitting on the edge of the bed, her legs spread wide as she crosses her arms in front of her chest.

“I wanna talk to you about something.” She says seriously. You feel your heart speed up. You feel like you’re in trouble, but you can’t seem to think of anything you did.

“It’s not bad, sweetheart. Don’t hurt yourself overthinking it. Here, come here.” She smiles at you and pats her lap, silently willing you to straddle her on the bed. You do, and you feel her palm your ass to scoot you closer to her. You gulp and push your hair behind your ears, looking down into her eyes.

“You know I think you’re beautiful, right?”

You giggle. “Of course I do, Billie! Is that what you needed to say?”

She shakes her head, stifling laughter of her own.

“I’m nervous around you, and that never happens to me. I guess I just wanna make sure I’m as perfect to you as you are to me. That make sense?”

You sense the air getting thicker with tension, and she’s back to a serious tone.

“I’m confused, you are perfect to me. What’s going on?”

She sighs, pulling a strand of hair back in front of your ear, toying with it. She looks up at you, and it’s like her eyes had gone dark. Her voice goes quiet, and she whispers like what she has to say might break the room if she says it too loud.

“I really, really want to fuck you, baby. But I don’t wanna pressure you. It’s just, it’s eating me alive.”

You feel your skin get hot and your cheeks flush with the deepest shade of pink. Your head spins and suddenly you’re hyperaware of every touch she’s giving you right now.

“Billie…”

“I know. I know and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything, it’s just so hard when you-”

You cut her off, grabbing her jaw gently.

“Billie, I want that.”

Immediately her mouth snaps shut, and she looks up at you with the most intense eye contact.

“You want what?”

You feel yourself shy away, too embarrassed to say what you meant. It’s hard to really say it, and you don’t want to look stupid.

“Say it, angel. Say what you want.” Her voice is sultry and raspy and driving you all sorts of wild.

“I want you to make me feel good. I want you to fuck me.”

Her tongue slides out between her lips, wetting them.

“You mean it?”

You nod.

“Words.”

“Yes, Billie. I mean it.”

And there was the shift.

She grabs the sides of your face, pulling you in for the most aggressive yet gentle kiss of your life. Her lips pillow against yours, and you feel pure ecstasy running in your veins. Subconsciously, you grind your hips, making you moan into her mouth. She softly nibbles on your bottom lip before pulling away, sliding her hands down to your hips. She watches as she pulls your hips, guiding them to grind on her thigh. She watches your face, your sweet, innocent face, contort with pleasure as she speeds up and slows down, driving you wild.

“If I’d known you wanted this too, I wouldn’t have waited so long.” She rasps.

You can’t speak. Your brain is foggy and your vision is blurry. All you can think of is the way that the rough material of her pants and the boxers you’re clad in feel against your clit.

“Go on, sweetheart. Get yourself off on my thigh.”

And you did, with the help of her hands guiding your hips. You came quickly, soaking your boxers and her leg. Your sweet moans filled her ears, swelling her heart and filling her head of the dirtiest thoughts.

“I was dreaming,” Billie starts, kissing your neck as you slow your pace, coming down from your high, her voice sweet as honey, “dreaming of you wrapped around my waist,” she kisses back up your neck, to your jaw and ear and cheek, back to your lips, “your legs wrapped all on me while I fuck you real nice.”

A soft sigh leaves your lips, and you feel yourself clench around nothing as her hands wander down your torso to your thighs.

“I think,” you whisper, breathless and so needy, “I can make your dreams come true.”

And boy, did you make them come true alright. You straddled her as she picked you up, turning you both around so your back was on the bed, and she gently kissed down your body. She carefully rid you of your shirt, but left on your bra as she made your way back down, kissing every inch of your warm skin.

“So fuckin’ pretty.” She murmured against your lower stomach, making you gasp from the vibrations. You uncrossed your legs from her body and picked your hips up so she could pull off the boxers.

“Do- do you think I can leave the underwear on?” Your voice was dripping with nervousness until Billie smiled softly, looking up at you.

“Whatever you want, baby. ‘S up to you.”

And it was. It always was. Her entire life was up to you, at this point. You unknowingly controlled her every thought, every action, everything she was. She pulled your underwear to the side, salivating at your gorgeousness.

“Been hiding this pretty little thing from me for so long, hm?” She smirks, watching you wiggle your hips in desperation. “You were gonna keep it from me ‘til I told you how bad I needed it?”

You nod, unable to think straight. She chuckles at you before dragging her finger up your folds, collecting your arousal that had been growing for what seemed like ages.

“Taste so fuckin’ sweet too.”

That’s the last thing you hear before your head goes blank and her fingers work veraciously on your nerves, not stopping until you reach your climax. She watches you wriggle underneath her as she slides her index finger inside of you, thumbing your clit with the same hand, and using the other to put pressure on your lower stomach.

“God, you’re so tight.” You hear her whisper over your moans, so close to cumming right then and there. Her fingers work expertly inside and on you, and she uses her plush lips to leave little pecks on your inner thighs. She watches you come undone, watches your sweet juices flood her fingers, only barely using her tongue to lap them up, not wanting to overstimulate you already. As you calm down, she slowly pulls her fingers out before bringing them to your own mouth, letting you taste yourself on her. Both of you moan at that, Billie’s eyes widening as you sucked her fingers expertly, and you could tell you were in for a long, long time.

Until you remember you had made plans with some friends to catch a movie at 7pm. And when you turn your head to the clock on the nightstand, reading 6:32, you look up at her with a look in your eyes she could read immediately.

“You okay?” She asks anxiously, not wanting to push you. You sit up, kissing her lips quickly, before sliding off the bed and searching for your clothes.

“I told Angela and Becca I’d meet them at the movies at 7. I’m so sorry, I totally forgot, please please don’t be mad!”

How could Billie be mad? She looked into your innocent eyes, smiling as she wipes her fingers on her pants.

“Could never be mad at you, sweet girl. You want clothes to wear? Sweats or something?”

You nod as she digs through her drawers, tossing a pair of sweatpants and a matching hoodie out toward you. As you slide them on, she kisses your head and goes down to your ear.

“Next time, I’m not letting you off so easily, though.”

You laugh, nudging her away.

“I wish I didn’t have to leave, I’m sorry. I really am. I promise I’ll make it up to you.” You smirk, and she bites her lip.

“I’ll be counting on it.”

She walks you to the door, seeing you off to your house, before shutting it, locking it, and walking into the kitchen, washing her hands and splashing her face with water, trying to rid her thoughts of you writhing underneath her.

She makes her way to the basement door, unlocking it with a key she kept in her pocket at all times, and flicks on the light, immediately hearing muffled whimpers. The stairs creak with each step she takes, and as she makes it to the bottom, she doesn’t even look at the bitch tied up in the chair before putting on her gloves and grabbing a knife, hitting the ‘Play’ button on her speaker. Music booms through the basement, rock this time, as she makes her way over to her next victim.

Billie rips the tape off of her mouth, and screams fill the room.

“Dumb bitch, you think I’d take this off if anyone could hear you scream?”

The look in the girl’s eyes only fueled Billie’s hunger.

“Wh- why are you doing this to me?” She forced out through sobs, her voice almost gone from screaming.

“‘Cause you’re a bitch, and bitches deserve to die.”

Billie smiles as she does it, singing to herself as she carves away, only dreading the mess she’ll have to clean up after.

And two weeks later, when the house next door to you was on the market again, you didn’t even blink an eyelid, just happy that the creep of a neighbor was overpowered by the one you loved just across the street.

Although, to you, you were just happy that the neighbor had “moved away.”

————————————————————————————

I promise I’m not crazy! Psycho!billie is tho

[delilahsturniolo]

deja vu — c.s

summary: after chris and y/n broke up, chris gets a new girlfriend months later. a wave of jealousy and deja vu washes over y/n, as she just can’t seem to move on from her hurt and pain of the past.

this story contains: angst, crying, arguing, kinda physical fight but veryy brief and not violent (just grabbing wrists) toxic relationship, no happy ending.

do not read if you aren’t comfortable!

written by: @delilahsturniolo

“i made the jokes you tell to her when she's with you.”

“do you get déjà vu when she's with you?”

6 months ago…

rain clattered harshly against the windows as i stood against the kitchen counter, my head was buried into my hands as I rubbed my eyes in exhaustion, frustration and stress flooding me.

i had no idea where chris was, he was getting home later and later every night. it felt like he couldn’t even bother to make time for me anymore.

as if on queue, i heard keys jingling by the front door. i immediately jumped up, seeing chris finally walking into the house. he had bags under his eyes, he looked drained and frustrated.

“where have you been?” i scoffed, crossing my arms. chris groaned and set his bag down, entering the kitchen.

“filming.” he blandly muttered, opening the fridge doors.

“you said you’d come home early though…it’s 1 AM. the storms pretty bad..” i mumbled, my eyes following his every move. chris grunted and slammed the fridge doors harshly.

“gosh y/n, can you get off my dick for one second? i can’t spend every waking moment with you, i have priorities.” chris’s tone was bitter as he turned to look at me.

i bit my lip, flinching slightly as he yelled. the thunder outside erupted louder and louder each time.

“so i’m not one of your priorities?” i locked eyes with him, chris shook his head.

“no..no y/n that’s not what i mea—“

“it seems like it. you don’t even show me love anymore, chris.” i blurted out.

“you’re acting like a brat. of course i love you, i’m just busy!” chris’s voice raised, which had been typical for him lately

“bullshit! i’m just saying i miss you! we’re always arguing 24/7, you never acknowledge my presence and we always go to bed upset with each other!” i practically screamed.

“then maybe this isn’t working, y/n. ever thought about that? you never fucking consider my feelings.” chris ran his hands through his hair in frustration.

i felt my heart sink. “wha…what do you mean?” i spoke barely above a whisper.

“you heard me. maybe this isn’t working out..maybe we shouldn’t be together if things are too complicated between us.” chris croaked out, his voice breaking with hurt and pain.

“chris no—we can make this work—“

“i don’t wanna hear it, y/n. you said it yourself. things aren’t working. we aren’t working.” chris expressed, his voice growing softer.

i felt myself at a loss for words, i couldn’t believe what was happening right now.

it felt like my heart had been stabbed with a knife.

“stop it, no no no..this isn’t necessary.” i tried fighting back, but chris only shook his head in disagreement.

“no, you stop it. we clearly can’t make each other happy. it’s impossible, i’m sorry but it’s the truth.” chris immediately shut me down.

“n—no! no no no no…you just don’t care! you don’t care about me— or about us!” i yelled in frustration, my voice cracked with hurt.

“how can you say that!? all i’ve ever done was care, i’m doing what’s best for us!” chris grabbed my wrist, i grunted as i yanked it away from his grasp harshly.

“fine then. just go.” i said firmly, my voice cracking as tears filled my eyes. chris didn’t budge.

“don’t stand there like an idiot, go!” i yelled, letting out a sob. chris bit his lip with guilt before going upstairs to grab his things.

i couldn’t deny his point. he was right, we weren’t working. our relationship was dragging us both down mentally.

a few moments later, chris came down with a few bags filled with all of this stuff. lighting struck, it’s reflection briefly flashing through the window.

chris came back downstairs, zipping up his bags. he didn’t even bother looking me in the eye.

“i’ll see you around.” chris whispered.

without another word, chris turned around and left. i assumed he would be staying with his brothers.

as the front door shut, i felt a pang of hurt. a relationship that was sacred to me, torn apart and ripped into pieces. I gripped the kitchen counter, beginning to sob. i couldn’t keep my emotions in anymore, i couldn’t pretend like i was okay.

i just felt…pain.

i couldn’t mend this, i couldn’t fix this. it was all over. and there was nothing i could do about that.

end of flashback… (present time.)

i jolted awake as an eruption of laughter startled me. i sighed in relief, feeling at peace knowing that i didn’t relive that moment, i just dreamed of it.

me, matt, nick, and chris were in the living room watching back to the future, chris’s choice of course.

although me and chris weren’t together anymore, matt and nick were still my best friends. me and chris didn’t speak much words to each other anymore.

chris’s phone buzzed loudly, causing nick to jump. i giggled lightly at his reaction.

a warm smile was plastered across chris’s face as he looked at his phone, his fingers typing quickly.

“guys.” chris spoke up suddenly.

“mmm..?” matt mumbled, falling asleep to the movie.

“my girl’s comin’ over. is that okay?” chris asked, nick nodded, yawning.

my heart was heavy as he said that, but i didn’t say anything to it. i agreed, pretending everything was okay on the inside.

i didn’t understand. i couldn’t move on, i was still single, and hurt. it felt pathetic.

i hadn’t met chris’s new girlfriend yet, but he spoke highly of her.

a few moments later the doorbell rang, chris smiled and practically jumped out of his seat on the sofa, rushing to the front door.

i heard the door open, and a girl giggling. i took a deep breath, sitting up as the voice grew closer.

“hi bunny, i missed you.” chris’s muffled voice said from the front entrance.

bunny. he used to call me that.

chris came back momentarily, his arm wrapped around a brunette girl that wore baggy jeans and a tank top. she wore gold jewelry and her makeup was absolutely flawless.

matt and nick had already met her, so they just waved and smiled.

“y/n?” chris called out. i turned my head to look at the couple.

“i want you to meet lily, my girlfriend. lily, this is y/n.” chris introduced us to each other.

lily stuck her hand out for me to take, i smiled and happily shook her hand. “hi! i’m lily, nice to meet you.”

“it’s nice to meet you too, i hope we can be friends.” i spoke. i smiled on the outside, but my heart was sinking on the inside.

lily smiled and nodded, letting go of my hand and walking over to chris again. i sighed, slumping my shoulders in exhaustion.

lily suddenly gasped. “we should watch the notebook, it’s my favorite movie!” she suggested, chris immediately agreed.

“i love that movie baby, c’mon we can watch it.” chris grabbed the remote, switching to the movie.

the notebook. the movie me and chris watched so much together we both could recite every line to each other, the movie that held a special meaning in my heart all because of him.

“i like that movie too.” i expressed, lily nodded. “that’s cool.” she shrugged.

chris’s eyes locked with mine, he saw through my fake smiles and laughs. i knew he did, he knew me better than i knew myself. he knew i was falling apart, and i hated that i cared about him still.

eventually, chris put on the move, he moved next to lily on the couch and cuddled her. nick was fast asleep while matt scrolled on his phone, tuning out the couple.

he caressed her thigh, executing comforting motions i remembered all too well.

i crossed my arms, looking away as tears brimmed my eyes.

maybe he just wasn’t the right person. but i was sick of waiting, and waiting, and waiting for the right person to come along. i just wanted to be loved, to be seen.

and maybe, just maybe i’d move on and find true love soon.

© delilahsturniolo

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