#and i loved how you incorporated things from his bday letter !!!!!!!!!!!

[kaikumin]

A Cake for a Cake [B.I/Hanbin]

[Requested]  Hello :) is it okay if I can request a Hanbin(iKON) scenario, where y/n is the nerdy girl at school who’s in love with the popular boy so y/n bothers him too much at times. The day of his birthday y/n bakes him a cake and when she takes to him she finds Hanbin with another girl, she leaves and leaves him alone for good. When Hanbin notice the attention that’s missing from her he tries to win her love back :). Thank you! I hope is not too much :( (angst and fluff)

a/n I’m sorry if this isn’t exactly what you wanted. I’m having a bit of bad day today, so my writing isn’t in it’s top shape and I feel like I didn’t do as well of a job portraying Hanbin as I would’ve liked, but I tried my best to incorporate what you wanted in it without making it too long. Sorry if that made it feel a little rushed. 

I also didn’t edit for typos, so excuse them if there are any. I hope you enjoy it! Feel free to request again if it’s not exactly what you wanted and I promise to work harder on it next time. Or even if you just want a new scenario, I’ll do my best.

enjoy

-Kai

word count: 1648 genre: kind of fluffy? pairings: Hanbin x Reader (B.I iKon)

You took a deep breath as you stared down at the cake in your hand. It was nothing special, really. A small one with a little bit of chocolate icing on the top and with sloppy letters spelling out “Happy Bday” in pink letters. A little heart decorated the last letter and despite what may seem like a shabby appearance to the outside world, you had truthfully spent hours working on it.

Your eyes moved up to the house across the street, a red door painted in the front a basket of flowers on the front porch, most likely from one of the many female students at school who also adored the boy you had so much affection for.

Hanbin had been your crush for as long as you could remember, neighbors since you were both five, and even having been friends at one point, before you entered Junior High and things dwindled downhill. You hadn’t realized how serious your crush for the boy had been until he matured faster than you did, becoming extremely popular amongst your fellow classmates, and leaving you behind. At age 12, it was heartbreaking, but you knew from then on that your crush not something that would go away.

Even when he ignored you or acted like you weren’t neighbors, you followed him around like a puppy. A ‘good morning’ and wave goodbye from school happened every day, and on each of his birthdays you would make sure to give him a gift of some sort, always handmade with care. This year you had decided a cake to be the best possible gift - he probably had enough of your friendship bracelets at that point to make a scarf out of them, and you wondered if maybe changing it up and giving him something a little more practical would gain some much wanted affection, or appreciation at the very least.

You made your way across the street to his front door, your hands shaking a tad bit at the thought of seeing him again. At the ripe age of 18, Hanbin had only grown to be even more handsome, and you were completely smitten.

So much so that it was rather heartbreaking for you, when the boy you had a crush wasn’t even the one to answer his front door, but a girl you had never even met before.

You didn’t fully remember what happened after that, your ears ringing and distracting you from whatever was actually going on. You saw as she muttered something, most likely a thank you, took the cake, stating she would hand it over to Hanbin before walking back inside and shutting the door in your face.

You felt almost numb as you walked back to your house, and as you spent the entire evening switching from glancing out the window cautiously to sitting on the couch lost in your thoughts. It was hours later than you saw his door open and the girl walk out, Hanbin stepping from behind her. Your heart broke when he pulled her into a warm hug, and it was in that moment you truly realized you had no chance with the boy.

--

A couple of weeks passed. Not once did you greet Hanbin like you normally would’ve had, your “good mornings” replaced with a simply bow of your head before you scurried off. You didn’t think he would care, or even notice the difference for that matter.

But you were wrong.

Hanbin noticed by the second day that you had begun to ignore him. He noticed how you avoided eye contact, didn’t smile, or even speak to him.

Truthfully, he cared more than he would have liked to admit. His friendship with you in your younger days had been his most cherished, even if he never stated as much. When Junior High came about and he suddenly gained popularity and new friends, he hadn’t meant for there to be such a distance created between the two of you, it just sort of happened naturally.

But, he relished in the moments you would still try your hardest to be around him. It gave him a tiny sliver of hope that you could return back into your old friendship one day.

And the worst part of it, he didn’t even know why you had suddenly given up on him.

It was after by the start of the third week that he had finally had enough, and he approached you after school, cornering you into one of the empty classrooms before you managed to run away.

“Y/N, what exactly did I do?”

You were confused when he spoke to you properly for the first time in years. The most you had gotten out of him was a brief sentence about his day. It was even more confusing considering he had never once paid you any attention before, and you were positive he had a girlfriend.

You said, not quite ready for whatever game was about to go on, your heart unable to take the pain. “Nothing. I have to get home.”

He brought his arm up to prevent you from walking away, shaking his head at you. “I’m serious.”

“I am too.” You huffed, pushing his arm away.

You were done with whatever heartache that boy managed to bring you. You promised yourself you wouldn’t put yourself through it any longer. You walked past him without looking back, ignoring him when he called out to you.

--

The next day, a little note appeared in your locker. The only thing scribbled on it was an “i’m sorry”.

The was the start of it all.

Every day after, a new note appeared, each one saying something new. After the fifth note, a little gift also showed up with it, one being a little chocolate kiss, to a small stuffed animal.

It was quite easy for you to figure out who everything came from, though it was near impossible to understand why.

On the seventh note Hanbin wrote “meet me at my house after school. please.”

You contemplated not going, but every gift made you weak, and horribly confused and you just wanted to know why he was doing all of this. He had acted like he didn’t care for years, and now he suddenly did and it left your head reeling.

You didn’t even second guess yourself when you showed up on his steps like he asked - even further surprised by the giant teddy bear that sat on the porch, staring at you with another one of his notes tucked into the bow wrapped around it’s neck.

“come inside.”

With a deep breath, you placed your hand on the doorknob, twisting it and pushing the door open. Hanbin stood on the other side of it, a tentative smile on his face as he held a chocolate cake in his hands.

You were quite shocked to see him there, but when you opened your mouth to ask what all of this was about, he shook his head, signalling for you to simply listen.

“Y/N, I know I never really said it, or acted like it, but I’ve missed you from the day we stopped hanging out. It became a guilty pleasure of mine to see you follow me around so keenly, and when you suddenly stopped, I grew anxious about it.”

He placed the cake on the counter and walked closer to you, running a hand through his dark hair.

“I thought repeatedly about what could’ve caused you to start ignoring me. At first I thought maybe you had just finally gotten fed up with how I was acting, and then I thought that maybe you found someone else that you liked so you didn’t care for me anymore. But, then I remembered the cake that was delivered to my door on my birthday.”

You blushed when he looked at his own cake with a warm smile.

“I was really happy when my cousin brought it in for me, telling me it was from you. I didn’t even think to realize that maybe you had gotten the wrong impression until I replayed the situation in my head.” Hanbin reached down and grabbed your hand in his. “I’m sorry if I made you think I had a girlfriend. That was just my cousin who came to see me for my birthday. I promise. I haven’t thought about about dating anyone since we stopped being friends, because I’ve honestly liked you this entire time, y/n.”

You frowned at him when the words left his mouth, each on settling in your head bit by bit. It didn’t fully hit you what he was saying until, he bit his lip in worry at your silence.

He had missed you, all this time.

“Why have you ignored me, then? If this was how you felt.” You questioned, shaking your head at him.

“Because I’m an idiot. You were the first girl I ever liked, and still like I didn’t know how to act around you. I’m sorry it took you ignoring me to figure out that I needed to stop acting so childish. I promise I won’t act like that any longer.”

It sunk in that Hanbin had just confessed to you, almost immediately after that. You were perhaps far too naive for your own good, but all of those hurt feelings of the years of being ignored and the jealousy of the girl, who actually turned out to be just a relative, vanished.

Hanbin liked you. He really liked you back and you couldn’t contain how happy and giddy that made you. He saw the smile creeping onto your face, the pink tint filling your cheeks and gave you a playful smirk, grabbing your other hand in his and pulling you closer.

“Y/N,” He started, the twinkle in his eye matching yours. “Will you please be my girlfriend?”

[alexisdesignsstuff]

Designing a Greeting Card Kiosk

By Alexis Kim

OVERVIEW:

I am designing and prototyping a greeting card kiosk. It will be a vending machine that sells cards and stickers to high school students. I researched purchasing general purchasing behaviors and then tested my concept to refine the

EARLY RESEARCH:

Papyrus:

Huge selection of greeting cards.

Birthday section is biggest.

Cards are very unique and artful.

Lots of different styles of design.

Humor/joke designs, minimalistic, physical decorations, art heavy, vintage, graphic design, animals, shiny etc.

Feels more marketed towards female purchasers.

Empty. No customers inside at 10:30 am.

Older Lady in her 60’s. Walgreens, 9/19/18: “It’s so difficult to find a good card. Usually buy from Nordstrom. It’s more expensive but better selection and designs. Buying card for a friend who is having a 60 something birthday. Like Papyrus much more. It’s more beautiful and has lots of beautiful cards. Every one of them is beautiful but each one is $10 - $7. $4.99 is an ok price. I’ve been looking here for half an hour. I have problems with knees that’s why I’m here at Walgreens (easier to get to). Ideally a perfect shopping experience, every card is beautiful. A less nice looking card is ok for someone I don’t really know. Less wording inside is better. Going to look at Papyrus now.”

Middle aged man with British accent. Target, 9/19/18: “I bought these [2 humor cards] because I have a warped sense of humor. It’s for my 17 year old son’s birthday. I spent less than 10 minutes looking for them. I’ll give the first one to him 1st thing in the morning. It’ll be the first thing he see’s and he’ll laugh all day about it. And the second golf card is to accompany his gift; I got him a voucher for golf lessons. It’s a spur of the moment thing, and I buy cards for close family only. It’s typical male humor. I’m happy with it.”

Young professional Female, late 30’s. Target, 9/19/18: Observations: She’s scanning and browsing. Take a step back to see. Look at messages in the Thank You section. Scan first. Message is important.“Giving this to thank a close friend who has been really supportive. I’m going through a big career change and its to thank her for believing in me. My eye goes to the bit above the fold. I’m attracted to fonts, bright colors. I like a mix of modern and unique. I like puns sometimes. I don’t like preachy, cliche, or old, traditional looking cards that my grandma would give. Would rather write my own sentiments. If there’s a lot of words I’ll just glaze over it and lose interest. Sometimes I find something very thoughtful and written in a way I wouldn’t have thought of and appreciate those.  Trader Joe’s has really killer 99 cent cards that I’ll buy a bunch of in advance. I’ll pay $3.99 for an nonembelished card. Something fancy like with rhinestones $4.99. Those kinds of cards are for someone really special and if I gave it to them in person. If mailing, I’ll pick something really flat. Looking here at Target because I’m picking up something for lunch. It’s convenient. Papyrus normally has good stuff. Paper Source has unique/off beaten path and random ones. I’ll buy a months worth of cards at Trader Joe’s and line them up for the month. My friends are so grateful to get real mail these days. It’s so worth it to make them feel so good for just $1.50. Minted - it’s an online order stationary store. Funny and unique. I like to buy cards in advance and hold onto it for months. For example, if I find a good romance one for my boyfriend, I’ll give it to him later. These days I’m also attracted to funny cards if I want to have fun or want to give someone a laugh."

CONCEPTING

CONCEPT TESTING

Q1: What do you think is going on here? (to learn if your concept is clear)

Q2: What questions do you have? (find out where it's not clear)

Q3: What would you change and why? (find out how they would improve it.)

Q4: Who do you think would use this? (if they would, they will tell you so. If not, listen and learn.)

Q5: Any ideas to add? (capture their ideas; you do not need to use these ideas, but you must listen to them.)

Gina K.17, texting her while she’s in yearbook class; 9/24/18

“So basically someone can buy these stickers or whatever is gonna be on there for cheap b/c like most students don’t keep a lot of money on them or just don’t have a lot in general. These stickers can be for like things to make things look better (in the storyboard) but in general for funnies. I think things like stickers can be used for many things. B/c right now a lot of people like to put stickers on their water bottles. The origami one is unclear. The secret message I like but I’m not sure if people would get the point?? Or like use it b/c I feel like there are a lot more ways now to do secret messages or something. idk we just like use our phones lol. I think it’s a great idea but I’m not sure if a lot of people would use it. And as for the storyboard… Not many people write letters now. I think if you do something handwritten it might be more of a girl thing nowadays??? Thinking about it I do think boys would use it but it does appeal more to girls in terms of most of the things you could use with these products. I think for the way you’re using the stickers in the storyboard you might wanna replace them with girls? Maybe not thank you cards but I can see birthday cards for those who forgot about someone’s birthday. I don’t know about boys but we girls typically just give them their gift and are like happy birthday! And sometimes watch them open their gift. I do find it a pain when it comes to getting bday cards b/c I have to go out to get them lol. And i try to make them but sometimes I just don’t have time. Depends but yea [we give presents] at lunch or b4 school. Lunch is more probable tho. My friends and I still give birthday cards, and I have some but they are just really kiddy lol. Like for someone in elementary school. So if it’s someone I’m not close to I don’t feel comfortable giving it to them lol. We have birthdays almost every 3 months or so. I think the product is ok. The storyboard you might wanna change them to girls and make it like a card instead but you can still incorporate stickers. If you wanna keep them as boys it would be like oh crap I forgot it’s so and so bday and get them like a card with stickers (like its the gift) and give it to the friend. I think it’s good to have the part where it shows that you can buy the product for a cheap price. It’s common for someone not knowing someone’s birthday until the day of. B/c most people don’t tell others what their birthday is unless they ask. The forgetting and the convenience of it is good b/c we are at school 5 days a week and at least like 6 hours lol. I think girls would use this mostly.

Valentyn T.32, phone call; 9/24/18

"The storyboard is trying to describe how using a sticker can increase value of letter. What’s the relationship between Shawn and Fred? It’s kind of weird. Feels girly. It’s feels fine if it's two girls who are friends. It’s also weird if a boy was writing to a letter to a girl. When I was student girls like stickers; boys don’t like stickers. Maybe you should make stickers have more value to differentiate them. Like some stickers can be really rare like pokemon. Or make some of them tattoo stickers. Target seems pretty limited to school kids."

Stacey T.31, texting her while she’s at work; 9/24/18

“Probably the one thing that sticks out it is the ‘I’m so poor’ comment. It has god in it, and it also is making a social commentary that spending only $5 is cause for someone to say with despair ‘God I’m so poor.’ I might be the wrong person to ask for feedback on Something like this because I’ve also been poor, though not as poor as there are people in the world, and hearing something like that riles me up. But everything else is lovely. Pretty straightfoward (what’s going on). Though it’s hard to tell where everything is happening. If you didn’t tell me at the start that this machine is in a high school… Maybe it’s a San Francisco thing, but growing up, I wouldn’t be able to bring cupcakes to a friend. I took the bus to school, and I didn’t have a way of getting to a grocery store or cupcake store bakery whatever. I wouldn’t connect with this experience unless I grew up in a city with those amenities. Nor did I even have $5 to spend, maybe in the summer when I had a job. But I think all of what I just said is coming from the far that it’s disjointed, the comic strip/storyboard. I liked the big hug in the end. [Who would use this?] Kids collecting stickers and fighting over who has the most coolest ones; Kids with money; Kids wanting to hack the machine so they can get them out for free; Maybe teachers. Beware of the angry parents who might not like things being sold to their kids in a school setting."

REVISED CONCEPT

I changed the persona to a female as all of my test subjects remarked that the cards and stickers would more likely be bought be females. I made sure to include in the Persona details about the student’s busy life and inability to get around independently. I also changed the storyboard to reflect the last minute and convenient nature of the purchase. 

[gem-marie-blog1]

Falling Behind

10:39 pm  Thursday I honestly don't think I could have picked a better time to incorporate the glucosamine and magnesium into my program.  I am in so much pain tonight it is almost unbearable to even lie down.  My entire back feels bruised as if someone has beaten me with a baseball bat.  I have muscles spasming everywhere and my joints are on fire.  I truly hope these new supplements help with pain relief, inflammation and sleep as well as the research seems to indicate. I NEED some restful SLEEP NOW! When you go for a certain period of time with little to no sleep it really starts to mess with your mind and your ability to not freak out over every little thing.  I am nearly at the end of my rope all the time lately because I am just exhausted.  I don't sleep soundly because I am in pain all night.  It is turning me into a very grouchy and negative person.  I do not wish to be a big jerk all the time.  So sleep has got to happen and it's got to happen NOW! Of course, I am super genius for sitting here blogging instead of already having the light off if I am so worried about sleep.  Right?  Duh! I hope to have a good report to share with you all in the morning on these new supplements. I also forgot to post my juice recipe today.  I will post it later in this blog post as well, if I can remember everything that went in it.  LOL! 1:53 PM  Saturday I have really been slacking with this blog and with doing the healthy things I am supposed to be doing for myself the past couple of days. Yesterday was the boy's 10th birthday and both the kids performed in a musical at school which had two performances.  I had to do a colonial style hairdo for the girl and stage makeup for a morning and evening performance.  The inlaws came into town for the morning performance and then we all went to a birthday lunch. I started out the morning vomiting off and on for a few hours.  I felt sick and feverish and my joints were killing me for most of the day.  I am not even sure how I managed to do the girl's hair and makeup as it it very difficult to raise my arms much higher than my waste when I am in this condition.  Somehow we made it happen though and she looked adorable. Brent and I were planning to take the kids to see the opening of Kong for the bday boy.  But by the time I had sat on the hard chairs for the hour and a half performance, plus the time we spent at lunch I was in so much pain that I was in a cold sweat.  There was no choice for me other than to come home and lie down while the three of them attended the movie. Man, talk about some serious mom guilt.  I usually go a bit overboard for birthdays.  Typically the kids wake up to balloons and streamers and paper cut outs of the number of years they are turning all over the house.  Unfortunately, I ran out of spoons and pain tolerance before they even made it to bed on Thursday night.  So my sweet little guy, newly double digits (kind of a big deal) did not wake up to these traditions yesterday and I did not attend his birthday movie with him.  Definitely feeling like mom of the year over here! Last night for their second performance I brought their two best friends along to watch and on the way home I stopped and bought a birthday balloon for the boy, flowers for the girl (she had kind of a big part in the play) and a 12 pack of Fanta (the boy's fav) and some cupcakes.  Phoning it in?  You'd better believe it.  We sang happy birthday in the car and they and their buddies had cupcakes on the way home at 9:30pm.  Sometimes I simply do what I can to get by and at least let them know that I care, even if I couldn't do my usual big deal stuff.   It is what it is.  If I obsess over the difference in my current abilities and what I would prefer to be doing,  I will just become depressed and be able to do even less.  I have mourned enough over the loss of the "old me." They know I love them and they still love me regardless of my shortcomings. Thank goodness for a simple reminder from a good friend! I had a sweet friend of mine message me this morning and snap me out of the neglectful way I have conducted myself the past two days.   This friend also struggles with chronic pain and fatigue.  She thanked me for this blog and mentioned that she is struggling to get moving today as she is in a great deal of pain and works a late job.  She mentioned that she finds my sharing about my struggle and my desire to push through the pain to be inspiring.  I appreciate her saying those things.  It made me feel less self conscious about sharing with all of you what I am going through.  But more than that it was a great wake up call! What the heck am I doing?  I didn't juice at all or exercise yesterday.  I only took a portion of my supplements.  I am in the process of baking a cake and throwing a birthday party today and have gone half the day, yet again, without doing everything in my regimen.  I did take my EmergenC and calcium, magnesium and B12.  But I have done little else that I am supposed to be doing to get myself well.  Instead I am only doing the things that wear me out and cause more pain.  How can I justify burning up spoons (refer to March 7 post for the 'spoon theory') and wearing myself out, if I am not going to try to replenish my energy and my ability to fight this harmful parasite in my body? Not smart, Gem Marie!  Get your act together! I messaged my friend back and encouraged her to get moving, even if it is just a little bit and/or to try and put some good things into her body today.  I can tell you this, one thing I will not be is a hypocrite.  I will not dole out advice and not practice what I preach.  It is just not in my character to do so.  Therefore, I am stepping up my game! I am so grateful to this friend for reaching out to me today!  Little did she know that in her effort to seek a little support on her end, she actually threw a big push my way.  We never know why we are prompted to reach out to another and I would venture a guess based on my own experience, that a lot of times our pride gets in the way and we choose not to do it.  We suffer in silence and think that no one wants to hear what we have to say.  Or that they wouldn't want to be bothered with our need for a little understanding.  What's funny about that is the fact that we may be helping them just as much, if not more, than they are helping us.  I am so grateful my friend was not too prideful to speak up and let me know she is struggling today.  I am sending positive vibes and much love her way and to anyone else who is having a hard time. WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER! I have decided to share what I told my friend in response to her message in case it could be helpful to anyone else who might be reading.  I really hope she won't mind. "It's certainly not easy and I get down on myself and my disease too sometimes. I think everyone who suffers with chronic pain and illness does. It's hard. Just hang in there babe and pick something small that you know you can handle and do it. It will make you feel like you've accomplished something and that begins to change your mindset which helps in not compounding an already difficult situation, by beating yourself up for the stuff you can't do. Make sense? So, say walking around isn't in the cards today, choose to write a letter or journal or read something uplifting or drink more water or choose to add in some foods today that help with pain and inflammation. Then, at the end of the day if you have managed to do that thing, whatever it is, you can use that feeling of accomplishment to push to do a little more tomorrow. Moving is important and believe it or not, even though our pain and fatigue is real, the ability to push yourself to get moving a little, is mostly mental. Every athlete or soldier will tell you that your brain gives up on any physical task long before your body ever will. Think about the 4 minute mile. For years no one thought it was possible until finally one guy did it. Then something like 14 other people did in that same year. The perception of their physical limitations had changed. That is really all it takes. If you are in too much pain, take a hot bath with Epsom salt to loosen up and then go for a super short walk or do some light stretching. Pick something you can handle but that is maybe a little more than the norm. If you do that, little by little everyday, my theory is that you will start to see some positive changes. I've been slacking pretty bad with my maintenance and with my blog the past couple days because we have had a lot going on. It's hard to remember to take care of ourselves like we should when our needs become overshadowed by those of our family. That is the balance I am working on figuring out currently. I have this very unhealthy all or nothing thing going on. Thank you so much for your message! You have helped snap me out of it and made me realize that I can't neglect myself today. I still have I take the time to put good things in my body and detox and blog and all the other healthy stuff I've been trying to do. Let me know if you are able to find a way to challenge yourself today. I would love to hear what you did and how it went! Remember it doesn't have to be big. Just has to be different." I went on to tell her that I hope I wasn't offensive with my advice. I know that the hardest thing to hear when one is in debilitating pain is that you should be moving or frankly that you need to DO anything. It can be so much easier said than done. I used to get pretty pissed when people would make this type of suggestion to me. I still get pretty annoyed with Brent from time to time when he tries to remind me of things like this, especially on super bad pain days. But whether I like it or not, this is what is required in order to start to heal. I know for a fact that the more times I win this particular battle in whatever small way I can, the better off I am in the long run. It is a long and arduous process, but it is the only path that I have found to at least begin making some small yet significant progress toward being well.

So, now to the healthy steps I am taking to ensure I do not remain completely off track today. - I am currently drinking some organic kombucha. - As soon as I finish the kombucha I will have orange juice, cherry juice and turmeric - I have taken ibuprofen - I have just taken my second dose of EmergenC - I am pounding water like crazy - I am juicing an anti-inflammatory juice as soon as I finish the cake - I will have a hot detox bath as soon as our party guests leave at 8:00pm This may just be the bare minimum today.  But as I told my friend, any progress is forward progress and is a positive thing. Update: The plan above did not quite go off without a hitch.  Kids started showing up early.  The mirror galaxy cake my son requested did not exactly work out.  As a matter of fact, I baked two different cakes.  Both a flop.  One, a fanta cake at the boy's initial request, which fell apart completely.  I then baked a second cake which also imploded, once I poured the glaze over top of it.  The punch overflowed, because I accidentally froze the 7up and the whole process of trying to have the treats ready in time for that portion of our little party was basically a big disaster.  Therefore, I ended up not having time to juice.  Bummer.  Instead, I am now drinking a Kevita Ginger and Turmeric drink.  Not my favorite flavor to be honest.  It kind of tastes like a spicy sort of pickle juice.  Yuck!  But it has some great probiotic and anti-inflammatory qualities.  So I will drink it whether I love it or not!  It is all about doing whatever I can to feel better, right?   Right! I used to spend two days planning and executing what were some pretty killer cakes for my kids' birthdays.   Now I try my luck at whipping up something cool in an afternoon.  Sometimes it works out.  Sometimes it does not.  I was pretty hard on myself earlier today when things were falling apart. I said and thought some very negative things about what a terrible mom I am and how nothing basically goes right anymore and blah, blah, blah... Self talk: Geez!  Get over yourself Gem Marie!  What is your deal?  Those kids shoveled cake into their like mouths like somebody was gonna take it away from them,  all while excitedly chattering about all the fun they had just had outside playing night games, led by the boy's awesomely fun dad.  Those kids couldn't have cared less what the stupid cake looked like.  Neither could that sweet boy.  Later he thanked us for an awesome birthday. It's true y'all!  They had a blast!  So who cares?  Saying something true to myself to quell negative thoughts is one of the new habits I am trying to develop.  I am certainly not the best at it.  But it is very helpful when I can put myself in check like that.  Sometimes it doesn't happen until hours later.  But I think as long as it happens at some point it can be counted as progress. Alright my friends, now I am off to take a much needed, and in my own opinion, well deserved and relaxing bath. Thanks as usual, for reading.  Please comment if you have anything to add or have any questions at all. Affirmation: I will do all that is within my capability and will not allow myself to shrink in the face of my challenges.