#and i liked to pretend i was drunk at times too 💀

[tojiscrack]

OKAYOKAY (you don’t have to post it btw if it’s too much i feel like im goning to rant😭)

the party doesn’t start till nine right? we spend the whole day out just hopping store to store (mind you we had the whole day to get costumes) we stop at like two spirit halloweens, five below, and like two walmarts and ofc the mall.

before we went to his house tho we went to the movies row at h terrifier 3 , the last time we hung out we didn’t get to watch it bc this fuck ass movie theater was like “you have to be 21 to take her inside 🧍‍♀️” so we came to a ghetto one so we can see it tg(that was my second time seeing it) okayokay we get to the house, we have two hours to spare so we nap (obviously) THEN WE SUDDENLY HAVE 10 MINUTES TILL THE PARTY? so we’re trying on our face paint and rushing (we just went as dead ppl) his friend gets there to the party and we’re just all chilling down stairs till more ppl get there fr, we had dominos and the roommate sister (we’ll call her Jessica Rabbit bc that was her costume) shows us all these jell-o shots and jello syringes she made. I got to have first pic bc i raised my hand fastest 😼 i got a blue on bc blue is awesome, from there everyone just starts talking a bit yk? the music gets going and we’re all mingling, there was a girl dressed as zoro (reminded me of my @zoropookie LMFAO but she was a dick, acted like those rude popular girls at school who try to be angsty but are just dicks about it) anyway Jessica Rabbit shows these cones she made and i took one not expected it to hit as hard as it did 😭 BUT I MADE A MISTAKE DOING THAT BC THREE HITS IN AND I FELT BLASTED? i finish the rest and start feeling groggy and just overwhelmed. Eventually we end up going inside and i was vibing with this one quiet girl (we were low key quite tg) we don’t know what to do with ourselves, we look around just kinda question things- “couch?” “couch is a good spot yeah” i swore the couch wasn’t as comfy before i got high, we agree it was the best place to sit, then my night kinda starts going south :/ there’s this guy dressed as chucky, he seemed to be on smth else? that or he was just anxious but anyway he sat next to me and was like “so how do yall know ___” i sat there like this 🧍‍♀️ BC I DIDNT KNOW WTF HE SAID?? so i told him “sorry im too high for this rn” and he left to land a caca in a porcelain bowl. I start feeling a little sick so i turn to the girl and said “hey i think k better go lay down” “no pls go lay down if you need to” “i might knock out tbh, it was really dope smoking with you tho” “i agree it was fun, i’ll see you later okay?” after that i walk up the stairs (as im walking i look for my cousin but he was busy playing beer pong) so i just go to the room, he comes up at some point to check on me and sends me a text saying to come down when i want, that he wants me to have fun.

THEN I PASS OUT? i just remember him coming into the room to complain abt how fucked up he got, after that he leaves again, then comes back like an hour later? and he finally goes to sleep but then i’m the one awake :( that’s when i realize i should’ve gone back down bc they started playing good music after i left, i just stayed in the room trying to go back to sleep.

SO it wasn’t all that nice? but i had a good time for the two hours i was actually there. This was nothing compared to the small party he had for his graduation tho.. still kinda upset i didn’t do more yk?

SORRY SORY THIS GOT SO LONG

woah 😨

[melanchoire]

g!p drunk karina idk if i asked this alr i forgot or maybe not

this is the first time you ask this anon!!

cw: alcohol, breeding, creampie, riding.

from the beginning you knew that accepting the invitation to the program on lee youngji’s youtube channel was a bad idea when you knew that you’d have to go with karina

she had already attended that show in 2023, but that episode was so chaotic. karina was the only idol who touched her plate of food during the video, and yet, not even when her mouth was full of food did she shut up or stop being so loud and noisy 😮‍💨 and when youngji gave her a compliment and she replied “stop lying. you say that to all the female idols.” you didn’t know whether to call it having bad temper or an unbearable attitude

and so it was! that day, it seemed like karina and youngji were competing to see who could playfully flirt with you, giving you sudden compliments and most of them were very unnecessary or stupid honestly

youngji giving you more alcohol than she should 😭 none of the idols who attended got drunk, rather tipsy or something looser, but you and karina? according to youngji’s words, it was a single bottle of soju, but you swear that every time the bottle was about to run out, the moment you looked away from it and back at the drink, it magically appeared full again 🤨 but she said you were probably just being a lightweight with a bad memory and your brain was playing tricks on you

and coming home was a complete horror 💀 both you, but especially karina, were too drunk to be able to use your phones and order a taxi or call the manager 😭 youngji having to take care of that on her own, pretending to be oblivious to the reason why you two seemed so affected by alcohol when supposedly all three of you ingested the same amounts of alcohol, when she was always focusing on talking more to avoid drinking too much and letting you be the ones who drink the most drinks

having to help karina get into the taxi because she was too drunk that she couldn’t get into the car and almost hit her forehead because apparently she forgot that to get into a car you have to bend down a little and lower your head

the way home being complete silence 😶‍ you feel the driver’s gaze on you at all times, his eyes meeting yours through the rearview mirror was something impossible to ignore 🤐 that old man probably thought you were two idiots who went out with their friends and drank until they got drunk…

karina leaned against the car door, looking through the window with an expression that made it abundantly clear that a part of her was no longer here… but what dominated your thoughts the most was you praying inside that she doesn’t feel nauseous or throw up in the taxi car 😣 it would be too much embarrassment for your own good

upon arriving at her apartment building, you pay the driver and get out of the car with her in record time, you were longing to get home and lie down in your bed, your body longing for that much–loved rest that the next morning would take its toll on you with a terrible hangover

helping karina walk to the elevator by putting your arm around her torso, but luckily, at least she wasn’t pushing her weight against your side because you weren’t strong enough to carry her

but she changes completely when she gets to the door of her apartment?!?!? you innocently thought that maybe the effects of the alcohol were slowly wearing off... how naive of you!

you sit on the couch with your phone in hand, ready to order another taxi so that this time you can be the one to head home

“what are you doing?” you didn’t hear karina’s footsteps when she approached you, much less did you feel when she sat on the couch next to you too close

“uhm, trying to hail a cab home.”

“you’re not going anywhere.”

you look at her with a frown, not understanding what the problem is with wanting to go home after a long and tiring day

“it‘s not safe for you to go home in this state. i mean, you’re a little drunk and it wouldn’t be very polite of me to leave you alone in this state. besides, the driver might try to take advantage of it.”

her words would have been sweeter and showed her concern for you if it weren’t for the fact that her hand is resting on your thigh and dangerously close to your inner thigh, sliding up and down as her head rests on your shoulder with her face almost hidden in the crook of your neck

and you would say something at the sudden and very close touch if it weren't for the fact that she doesn’t let you react and suddenly kisses you

you would object to this but you would be lying if you said you hadn’t wanted for a long time to be this close to your dear leader... but please! she’s the whole combo. that pretty face with pronounced and sharp features that looks good even without makeup. that body… at first, it seemed a little absurd when fans were so obsessed with the term “body goals” or always talking about the artists’ bodies, but god, when you started going to the gym or practicing and rehearsing choreographies for comebacks or performances at awards ceremonies with karina, your mouth watered every time karina wore tight shirts or something that accentuated her chest 👀 and when she wore leggings or sweatpants? it was more than a difficult task for you not to have your eyes glued to the notorious outline of her dick 😣 you felt like a pervert having your gaze glued to your leader’s crotch every time you saw the tent in her pants, almost immediately taking your eyes off her and hoping that if anyone noticed they would think you were just staring at a blank spot or just not focusing your gaze

you don’t remember exactly when you went from just kissing karina on the couch in her apartment to being on her lap riding her cock... but you weren’t complaining!

based on her blurry eyes and lazy grin you can’t exactly tell what she’s concentrating on right now… maybe she was paying attention to the vulnerable look on your face, noticing the frown and grimace you were trying to hide due to you having some difficulty getting used to the size of your leader ☹️ or maybe she was admiring the way your hips moved against hers and how your pussy was having some trouble taking her length completely because look at her! she’s definitely big and just by looking at her face you know it 😉 and the way your tits were bouncing under your shirt? that was something that had caught karina’s gaze and had taken her full attention, if it were up to her, she wouldn’t have hesitated twice to tear the fabric from your skin and let your bare breasts jiggle in front of her face or even bury her face between them and entertain her mouth for a while… but karina’s hands were too busy resting on your thighs and massaging your skin, occasionally rising to sit on your hip bones and guide your movements, or even go down to your ass and give your cheeks a couple of slaps until they have bright red finger marks and then massage the skin to make sure you’re not so sore afterwards because she’s not that mean!

she’s sooo cocky about it. “having a hard time up there? c’mon baby, i know you can take it. do it for unnie.” and she digs her fingers into your hips as she moves her own hips up to meet yours and thrust into you 😵‍💫

and she absolutely loves it when your orgasm starts to get closer and you lose control completely, going from having your hands on her shoulders to wrapping your arms around her neck and pressing your chest against hers as you lose complete control as you ride her 🥴

and karina is not mean or selfish at all! massaging your clit with two of her fingers in a rhythm that drove you crazy, whispering taunts mixed with compliments in your ear and looking at you with glossy eyes and a smug smile… she really enjoyed it when you came on her cock at the same time as she filled your womb with her seed! 🥰 keeping her cock inside your pussy to make sure she keeps it all inside you until your walls absorb it completely and not even the smallest drop dares to escape

your limp body resting on top of karina’s because riding her took all the energy out of your body and the alcohol was starting to take its toll on you and you were starting to feel dizzy 💔

luckily, karina unnie is always here to take care of her members, especially when it comes to her favorite member ❤️ running a hand through your hair, brushing away the loose strands that stuck to your forehead from the thin layer of sweat covering your body, giving you a kiss on the crown of your head and massaging your back

but karina was in a much worse state than you, even if you don’t believe it! it was enough to leave you lying on her bed for her body to fall on the mattress as if she had no life

and well, the next day is a different story. waking up with karina hugging you from behind, her chest pressed against your back and murmuring a ‘good morning.’ in a deep and raspy voice 😵‍💫 she offers you to shower with her because according to her words it’s late and you have less than an hour to get ready and go to the company, and well, for one or another reason you two end up having a quickie in the shower, karina pressing your chest against the cold tiles of the wall and fucking you from behind with her hands having an almost tearing grip on your waist and growling in your ear 🤤

arriving at practice with an unbearable hangover and pain in your hips that you try to hide but it’s difficult when you have to do a movement that requires too much effort in that area… the members know that you did nothing but sit and drink with youngji yesterday, but none of them dare to comment on what their unnies do in their free time together

[ynbabe]

would you write an smau with yuki or Oscar with an ex racer male reader who hangs out around the paddock a lot, maybe there could be a scene where yuki/oscar gets asked in an interview about rumors about who he’s dating and reader’s reaction gives it away?

Chose Oscar for this one cause I'm gonna make the reader similar to a certain someone hehhehe

Also let’s all pretend this isn’t like 9 months later okay 😭😭

lando.jpg

lando.jpg he's such an airport dad (he still has my passport...)

username is that oscar?? in the last pic???

lando.jpg yes @/y/n/l/nofficial did a lil therapy session

lando.jpg father

y/n/l/nofficial do NOT call me that lando.jpg Daddy y/n/l/nofficial NO-

username the comments 💀

username lando just replaced Carlos with another older Spanish man- We see u pookie we'd fall Y/n too

oscarpiastri the one time I'm featured and I'm drunk and crying? I'm calling my father @/charlesleclerc

lando.jpg you're lucky thats all thats featured lando.jpg are you sure thats the daddy you wanna call? lando.jpg deleted comment

username HELLO??? WHAT IS GOING ON???

y/n/l/nofficial

y/n/l/nofficial he stole my bike so I stole his look🥰

username I need someone to look at me the way Oscar looks at Y/n

username that hoodie looks a lil too snug bbg do u have something to tell us??

username fr like Y/n is BUILT no way that’s his hoodie

username that’s Oscars for sure

mclarenf1 driver swap?

username YES pls get y/n back just for one race guys pls i beg landonorris I agree Oscars mean to me Y/n’s nice 🥰 oscarpiastri I’m sorry I didn’t laugh at your knock-knock joke 🙄

You laughed as you saw all the comments under your post, knowing you were joining the McLaren garage for the Austrian GP.

--------------------------------

You cheered as Oscar got P2 screaming with everyone else. Jumping and screaming with mechanics that used to be yours.

Everyone had thought you’d hate the boy replacing you, how you’d force everyone to side with you over him, poisoning Lando’s and the teams mind against him. They couldn’t be more wrong.

You grabbed the younger man’s fireproofs collar, pushing him to the wall.

“Y/n?” “P2 baby,”

You smiled looking down at him, giving up on being professional and placing your lips on his, trying to hold back knowing the man was tired but you simply couldn’t, tasting the sweet champagne from his tongue, you pushed one knee in between his separating them.

He gasped, arching his back away from the thin motorhome wall, grabbing a fist full of your hair, making you moan, his other hand reaching to the buckle of your belt.

You separated to breath, both panting, sweaty and blushing, resting our foreheads together.

“You think we’ve got time?” You asked, placing a soft kiss at the corner of his lips, feeling them lift up into a smile.

Just as the boy was about to speak, there was loud knocking on the door, shaking the wall next to it, “No monkey business guys,” a British voice yelled laced with a teasing tone, “Osco needs to be able to walk to the interview room,” he cackled making the other men groan.

“Shut up, Cabron, go annoy Carlos or something,” you yelled, resting your head on Oscars.

“Damn you sound just like him, I must have gotten confused,” he squeaked like a dolphin making Oscar cringe at the insinuation, pushing you away.

He pulled the door open, making the other boy falling in, “Disgusting Lando, never say that again,” he whined making the older papaya clad boy laugh again.

“It’s giving enemies to lovers, 100k words-”

“GET OFF AO3,”

“GET OFF Y/N, YOUR FRICKING LIPS ARE SWOLLEN!” He yelled pointing at his own lips, making Oscar cover his, both looking at you and back at each other, making you realise your unbuckled belt with the reddened lips didn’t look very innocent.

“Ewwwwwww!” Lando groaned, running out the room, “be at the press room in 5 minutes you disgusting rabbits, oh my god,” he cried as he sped down the hallway.

Oscar looked at you, cheeks tinted pink in embarrassment, making you smile back at him, suddenly shifting to a smirk, “well, we do have 5 minutes,” you winked, making him groan and look away.

“Shut up, y/n,” he rolled his eyes and began walking out, with you hot on his heels.

You quickly caught up to him, pulling him into you by his waist while you walked side by side with him, lips to his ears, “oh, it’s y/n now? I remember something like- please, oh god, please don’t stop, ahh,” you moaned quietly, leaning back to normal and walking away, leaving a stunned Oscar behind.

“Come on, Osco, you’re getting late,” you called, smiling to yourself for causing such a reaction from the usually calm and collected man.

You had followed him to where the duo was being interviewed, cameras had been set up by the pr team, and a small section at the side for Zak, Andrea and the race engineers incase there were any questions for the team. You saw an extra chair and made your way to sit next to the boss man himself, quite happy to get to reconnect with your old boss.

The interviewer asked questions after questions with Lando being the leading man as usual, your boyfriend being the more reserved between the duo.

You took a sip of water, keeping the bottle in your hand, lost in the conversation between you and the others but heard Oscar being singled out.

“So our podium sitter here, Mr. Piastri!” The interviewer hyped up, making Oscar smile and nod, “let’s move away from the race and focus on your relationships,” he cooed trying to elicit a response but McLaren media training was a beast so all he got was a small laugh from both boys.

Lando took the lead once again, “I’m just happy it’s not me for once,” he laughed.

“Ooh,” the interviewer gasped, turning the older man at the side, “talking about relationships, rather rumours, I believe we’ve got the F1 heart throb, Y/n L/n here,” the camera panned to you, mid conversation with your former boss who nudged you, bringing your attention to the camera to which you waved at, feeling like a deer caught in headlights. The man called you over, obviously happy that he could get more out of the interview.

You wanted to refuse but couldn’t, walking up to the table and finding no space as both boys had chairs, you placed your arm around Oscar, shaking his shoulder as you slightly pulled him to make space for you. You smiled at the interviewer, keeping your hand on Oscars waist, holding on to the boy so he didn’t fall of.

“Oscar, you good there?” The man asked eliciting a nervous laugh and a seagull screech from Lando.

You laughed along, pushing and pulling him back into you, his hands finding his way to your thighs to stable himself , “Oski’s about to fall,” you wriggled your brows.

“So onto all the rumours,” the man continued, oblivious to what was happening behind the table, “now the two men besides you have had plenty of rumours themselves,” which was a nice way of putting ‘WE SAW HIM KISSING A MAN’ in a pc way, “but we’ve got some sources telling us you’re in a steady relationship, anyone we’d know Oscar?” You brought the water bottle to your lips, waiting for Oscar’s answer, missing the way he’d looked at you.

Unfortunately the interviewer and camera had not, “Why are we looking at y/n?” WHAT- you chocked on the water, spilling it all over your white shirt, pushing Oscar off the chair whom pulled you and Lando down with him.

“We’re okay!” Lando screamed, one hand raised.

“IM NOT” you groaned having broken Oscar's fall.

You'd though (hoped) nothing would come of the interview, but boy were you wrong, because the edits, oh god the edits. You almost had tears in your eyes at how creative some were and actual tears about how dirty the others were.

The sound bite of you and Oscar groaning after falling had been used to hell and back and every single driver had to keep reminding you of it. Especially Lando who kept sending you thrist edits to the point you were concerned about his fyp.

But the worst part was all the speculation. And all any interviewer would ask you or Oscar would be about the rumours. You were fine with it, having dealt with stuff like this all your career but the defeated look on Oscar's face after an amazing race only to be asked a very inappropriate question about the two of you had you wanting to punch people.

After a long, long, talk with Mark and both your respective PR teams, you knew the best option would be to come out with it on your own. So you did exactly that.

y/n.jpg

y/n.jpg well since y’all got your fucking degrees and know every fucking thing 🙄

lando.jpg the duality of man ft y/n l/n and oscar piastri

oscarpiastri woooooooooooooooow suddenly everyone has a jpg

y/n.jpg hey I wanted to do this on my main but someone kept whining about pr 🫵

oscarpiastri that’s it your sleeping on the couch

lando.jpg damn idts old man y/n’s back can take that 😩

y/n.jpg I’M 25!!!

[stardew-shitposterino]

Stardew Valley Bachelors and how they deal with their secret crush on the farmer

———-——————————

BEHOOOOLD! I’m kind of back but I’m not because I have a job and feel tired most of the time. I still need to get used to adult life. Anyway, here are the bachelors and how they deal with having a fat crush on you, you cutesy farmer person covered in filth!

Contents might be a bit NSFW so MINORS…you know what not to do *fights them off with a stick*

Enjoy my brainrot 🍓🥰

Sam:

-Sammy is a cute little guy, almost like a dog wagging it’s tail when they see their owner.

-he is SO BAD at hiding it

-he will dream about you two jamming on a big stage together. In his ideal world, you two are a successful duo who make noise rock (kind of like the white stripes minus the weird siblings or married controversy)

-Sam will write songs about you. It’s not intentional per say, and he thinks he really sucks at writing love songs, but it just happens whenever he has to think about you. The words just start flowing.

-he might or might not have had some steamy shower fantasies about you…while in the shower. Jodie keeps complaining about the water bill being unusually high 👀

-yet, Sam is usually not too horny when he is in love with you. He is more gushy and daydreamy than anything

Sebastian:

-homeboy works with nightcore versions of love songs to cope with his longing

-he isn’t the type to show his feelings so openly, so no one really notices his crush on you. Maybe Sam, but well, he is Seb’s best bud. Of course he can tell

-He notices how his sleep has improved since having a crush on you. He willingly goes to bed earlier to have some time to imagine scenarios of you two

-just you and him together on his cool ass motorcycle, driving into the night and ending it with a passionate kiss (sounds familiar?)

-well,,, let’s just say Seb is increasingly horny since having a crush on you. Before, he was almost certain he is some sort of asexual, but nope 😃 he’s healthy and extremely down bad for the filthy farmer who eats raw fish out of the pond 🥰

-what I mean by horny? Uhhh… he didn’t really need to rely on certain websites to satisfy his needs, that’s for sure 👀

Harvey:

-Harvey is a good man. A very good man

-god bless his soul 😫

-Harv isn’t the type to have crushes easily…I can’t believe it either, considering his crush on Maru who is way younger than him 💀

-but in my head, he isn’t the type to be all lovey dovey over someone. That’s why he’s so bad at hiding it. But you don’t really notice. You just suspect it but it could also be his usual anxiety lol

-it happened anyway😎 and he doesn’t know how to cope. At all.

-he has to think about you at all times, especially when he looks at the empty jars of delicious pickles you’ve made him

-This man is usually collected, but now?! He forgets everything, can’t even form a comprehensible sentence at times when his mind is busy thinking about a romantic picknick date with a lovely farmer

-Harvey’s libido is pretty much a dead beat horse 💀 but now he even feels the desire to do some nasty nasty at times. It’s still pretty tame, he’s a gentleman through and through, but wild for him to have those feelings and longings after what feels like decades. He’s not mad at it. He has felt low-key dead inside for so long so this is very exciting and he’s eager to explore this side of him…despite being anxious 😭

Elliott:

-bet your ass he’s the prince of crushes

-he is very dedicated and welcomes those refreshing feelings with a kiss

-feeling better than usual AND having inspiration to write ?! SIGN HIM UP

-he will use every chance he can get to talk to you, maybe even get you drunk (in a non creepy way) because he likes when you’re unapologetically authentic and let loose. It makes him feel more in touch with your soul (or some shit idk I’m not a poet)

-Elliott is NOT SUBTLE

-you practically know from the start that he has the hots for you, but it’s kinda funny seeing him try to pretend it’s not that way…if you can even call that pretending not to be 😭

- his passion doesn’t end at his artistry. This guy will spend a lot of time in his shower thinking about what could be, or sitting at the docks at night just staring at the sea (he’s NOT doing anything nasty in public, peeps. Don’t get it twisted)

-I can also see him recreate a romantic bedroom date he’d love to have with you…but it’s just him 🤷🏼‍♀️ self care king 👑

Shane:

-like Harvey: HE CANNOT COPE!

-he hasn’t felt like this since high school. Every other encounter with potential partners was surface level and only based on sexual satisfaction

-so caring about you, thinking about what makes you happy and how he could be the reason you smile every day, that’s a lot for him

-as stupid as it sounds, he spirals and becomes low-key miserable over it. Give this man a 101 lesson on how to process emotions 😭

-despite the constant anxiety he feels, he low-key enjoys it. It’s kind of hopeless as well as pointless in his honest opinion, but there is this believe, that 0.00001% chance (in his mind) that he could turn his life around and be happy with you, married and maybe have a child of his own one day

-but that’s wishful thinking, riiiiiiight? So what does a self loathing piece of alcoholic man do instead of making a move? Yeah, self pleasure even more than usual, to get at least a bit of serotonin and the willpower to get his shit together, at least for you if it isn’t for him. He’s pretty rough with it too (ouch, unless you’re into that)

-sorry bros but him having a crush is not really all that cute. He’s my cutie pie, but let’s be real: him dealing with those feelings he tried to shut off for so long will be tragic in a way. He’s battling his inner demons here. So yeah… :(

Alex:

-my man, my maaaaan 🥰

-he has earned a soft spot in my heart, bless his soul

-so Alex has a crush on you from the start, it’s basically canon

-can he show his feelings? Yes! Can he do that in a way that can be read as the feelings he tries to get across to you? NO!

-low-key bullying is his love language 🥰

-at least in the beginning. He’s a bit anxious and fears he isn’t good enough for you, so he doesn’t try to be authentic. Being the jock jerk everyone expects him to be gets a reaction out of you and that’s better than nothing, right?

-he’s neither the poetic nor the intellectual type, so he doesn’t process his emotions by writing them down or putting them into words. Just imagine him going about his work-out routine, just thinking about your beautiful smile and rocking bod while sweating like a hog

-Alex and quiet ? Yes that’s possible. I imagine him to go quieter than usual since having a crush on you. He processes everything internally and that takes a lot of time for him as he usually just shrugs off his emotions and doesn’t try to brood too much on them. But now?! He can’t but blush in silence as he just imagines how soft and small your hands must be next to his (yours are way more impressive than his and calloused to the gods, but let him have this moment)

-when it comes to being nasty…Alex is a serial romantic. We know that he probably was the lady’s man back in school so he probably got some action one way or another. In other words, man has the libido of a teen that just hit puberty 💀

-despite being quite horny, he was able to manage to just do it every other day. Now, he cannot even get out of bed in the morning before doing it as you pester his dreams and make his hormones go crazy first thing in the morning…so many nice boxer shorts were lost along the way 🫡

-he also did his own laundry for the first time during that period lmfao

[k-n0-x]

Drunken confessions- Lucifer x reader- 100 Followers special! ✨

A/N- Hey everyone! This small one shot is a Luci x reader fic to mark my 100 followers special (It increased to 120 as I was writing this lmfaoaoao💀💀) per the poll I hosted not too long ago. We can't get enough of our favourite boy, can we

Tysm guys <3

Nsfw ahead!

🦢·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·🦢

You swirl the remaining amount of red drink in your cup, facing the only man that you love with all your heart.

“So, Apple Pie, this ain't so bad, right?”

Lucifer and yourself have been together for years.

Today marks the fifth year of such.

You guys have been through thick and thin together, and over the course of those years, his love for you only grew, especially when you saw Charlie as your own and she loved you as a mother in turn.

So much so that she decided to organise a ‘Super romantic, candle lit, heartfelt dinner’ (Her words, not mine) at her hotel.

Nonetheless, she really pulled off all the stops; that quirk just sort of comes with her personality.

Just like her father.

“Your daughter has really outdone herself this time Luci,” you place the glass cup on the table.

“Yeah, sshe's like that,” The demon king chuckles, drinking another glass of wine.

“Careful, you know how tipsy you can get darling,”

Your lover snickers.

“Asss if! Your’rre talking to the King of Hell here,” The rosy-cheeked demon takes your hand.

He hiccups.

“Oh yeah? Well, my king seems to be tripping over his words. Come on love, let's go upstairs,” You grab Lucifer by the arm, but he pulls you back into a hug.

“I love you sooooo much, my Songbird,” Lucifer plants his lips on yours, which you accept.

Kissing him is like eating : you need it to live, and it's exhilarating when you appreciate it, no matter how often you partake in it.

His hands trace up and down your back, reaching for the zipper at the back of your dress.

“Hey now? Cheeky are we?” You tease.

“Come on, my darling King, let's go somewhere more… private,” Seems like the alcohol caught up to you too.

Nonetheless, Lucifer displays a toothy grin and bridal carries you to one of the guest bedrooms upstairs.

The room was decorated with an array of shades of red. The bed was king size with plush pillows and a crimson sheet.

But more about that later.

Lucifer hungrily pounces on you, pinning you on the bed, painting bites and hickeys all over your neck, eliciting moans from you.

You tussle his platinum blond hair and your legs find themselves wrapped around your husband’s waist, as you both continue to make out passionately, rocking back and forth as one.

Things were getting steamy, and lo and behold, a familiar friend appears from Lucifer’s groin.

He pulls you closer, and you grind against him.

“Ugh, Sweetheart,” Lucifer groans from the pressure.

Lucifer’s hands frantically try to take off your dress by all means, pathetically wanting you, needing you.

You tsk.

“Needy, aren't we?” Your fingers drum gently on his flushed face, eyes lidded.

You sit on top of him, pretending to think, continuing to grind on him.

“Now, now, good things don't come fast…. but~,” You pause.

“Good boys deserve a reward, am I right?” You coo, the King of Hell whimpering at the words in agreement.

Even though you've done this countless times, it’s still amusing how you can bring the King of Hell down to a blubbering mess.

The alcohol sure does help though.

“Songbird- please- I can't take this anymore,”

“Ssh, It’s okay honey, just relax, you're a bit drunk right now. Let me take care of you,” you say as you pull down your partner’s trousers, letting his erect cock loose.

Lucifer zips down your dress simultaneously and it falls off of the bed. His lust-filled eyes look at your beautiful figure, truly enamoured by it.

Slowly, you let yourself sit on his throbbing dick, holding Lucifer’s face in your hands, whispering sweet nothings in his ear.

You could practically feel him itching to thrust himself in you, but refraining from doing so.

“My love please,” Lucifer whines as his hips buckle under your body, begging for any stimulation.

Finally (To Lucifer anyway) you start to shift and move around on his member.

When you started, both of you couldn't stop. Despite his position, he manages to pump in and out of you.

“Hng- Ahh, Yes! Right there, ng-” your wet folds expand to his cock, and your arms claw at his back, you moan at each and every thrust that reaches within you.

“Don't stop- Oh God I'm about to-” before you could even sputter the words out, your orgasm makes you shiver and draw heavy breaths along with Lucifer’s cum filling up your hole, thin ropes of it glazing down his manhood.

You feel the demon’s wings wrapping around you in an embrace, closing you both from the world; it's only you and him.

“Angel?” Lucifer mumbles into your shoulder.

“Hm?”

“I love you so much. Thank you for being mine,”

“And the same from me Luci,” You gently peck his beautiful face.

꧁ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ꧂

“Sooo, how was the dinner?” Charlie practically jumping up and down of her seat during breakfast the next morning.

Lucifer wanted to sleep in a bit, so you let him be upstairs.

“Perfect, Charlie,” You respond, sipping a cup of tea.

“Thank you,”

“Yo Charlie,” Angel pipes up.

“Seems like you may have a younger sibling sometime soon- ow!” you kick the porn star under the table.

Charlie flushes at Angel’s remark.

You groan at Angel’s smug grin.

Well, at least Charlie knows that you and her dad love each other.

Right?

🦢·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·🦢

Word count- 913 words~

[hearts4golbach]

could u do johnnie guilbert smut? maybe with him being sub? like whimpering and shit 💀 idk how else to explain lmao 😭

Disco Stick. (Johnnie Guilbert x Fem!Reader.)

warning: consensual sex under the influence of alcohol.

im not sure if all of this is true so if its not pretend it is!

-

The club was definitely not my first choice of entertainment, but it'd do. Me and F/n pulled up to the most popular club near us, hoping we'd meet new guys to spice up our boring lives.

we got in surprisingly quick and went to find somewhere to sit and get drinks. we settled on the bar, sitting in the very far corner so we wouldnt bother anyone. I ordered my usual while f/n decided not to drink at all so she could drive us home. sadly, next time id be designated driver.

"its boring over here, once you get your drink lets go walk around or something." she offered, sipping her sprite.

i nodded in agreement. shorty after, i finally got my drink and we got up to walk around. i sipped on my drink as we began to walk into a crowd. i was worried id spill it. i pushed through a couple people carefully, making not to disturb anyone. 2 guys with black hair stood in front of me, i began to swerve around them before one turned around, bumping into me. luckily, my drink didnt get spilt.

"shit, i am so sorry." i heard an old, oddly familiar voice apologize.

"its all good," i looked up to see his face. "no fucking way, johnnie? do you remember me from chemistry?"

excitement twinkled in his eyes as he smiled. "yeah, you were the best lab partner i ever had. how could i forget?"

"i remember you too!" jake said sarcastically, rolling his eyes.

"sorry, jake! how could i forget you, you always made chemistry genuinely funny!"

"junior year chem was the shit with the 3 of us!" johnnie added as he giggled.

"we should catch up! ill buy you 2 a drink!" i yell over the blaring music.

"im down." he grinned. i grabbed his hand and we walked back to the bar, f/n and jake behind us.

as we sat back down, i introduced them to f/n. "this is f/n, she didnt go to the same highschool as us but we went to middle school together and weve been friends ever since."

jake shook her hand and johnnie waved. "im jake, and this is johnnie." he said, tilting his head towards johnnie.

"hey! its nice to meet you guys." she smiled sweetly.

we spent a couple more hoirs drinking and reminiscing over all of the awkward but funny moments we had together. the three of us were the chemistry group as people would say. although we fucked off a lot, all of us ended with a 95% or higher because we made that class bearable. id rather not talk about my other grades, though.

by the time we were leaving, me and johnnie were drunk as fucking sailors. we held onto eachother, stuck like glue as we giggled over everything. we frequently tripped, unsure of our footing causing f/n or jake to help us regain our shared balance. i had my arm wrapped around his shoulders and the other holding onto the arm that was wrapped around my waist. me and johmnie clicked, just like old times.

f/n and jake threw us in the backseat. johnnie laid his head on my shoulder and i rested my head on top of his. i was nearly asleep before i was awoken by johnnie gagging loudly. "ew, what the fuck was that about?" i slurred.

"i felt like it." he laughed. i rolled my eyes and got out of the car as we parked. i dragged johnnie out behind me and gripped onto him the same way i had before.

while i was drifiting off, f/n and jake had decided theyd just stay the night at our apartment. me and johnnie were estatic about our sleepover. "why dont we just share your bed?" he smiled and laughed, making his eyes squint.

i sighed contently. "that sounds amazing. you can be my pillow." i smiled sweetly.

"of course." johnnie slurred, following me into my room.

"goodnight, lovebugs, sleep tight." f/n teased while jake ooo'd from the living room.

i laughed at her comment and laid in bed next to johnnie. he looked deeply into my eyes, looking like he had something to say but holding back. but i knew what he wanted to say, and i wanted to say it too. "i was in love with you all throughout highschool." i confessed.

"really?" his face brightened, "i was, too. theres not a day where you dont cross my mind, still." he admitted.

"me too, i was so scared to reach out. i wish you said something before we graduated." i frowned.

"me too." he whispered, his eyes flickering down to my lips then back up into my eyes. his blue eyes pierced through mine, making my insides turn to mush.

we gazed into eachothers eyes for a solid minute before i leaned in and kissed him. he immediately kissed me back, grabbing my waist and pulling me in. it was passionate and needy, making chills run down my spine. i pressed into him, wanting more. his tongue swiped my bottom lip. i ran my fingers through his hair before flipping us over and sitting on top of him. his hands carefully slid down to my ass, giving it a gentl squeeze before moving down to grip my thighs.

johnnie pulled back. "is this okay?" he asked, breathing heavily.

i nodded fast, pulling him back in. i grinded down onto his hard member, making him whimper quietly into my mouth. he began to take off my shirt, breaking the kiss long enough that i could get his off, too. i lazily unbuttoned his pants, not bothering to break the kiss. i felt his hot breath heavy on my face. i pulled his jeans down just enough so i could see his boxers.

"fuck, y/n," johnnie whispered, pulling my shorts and underwear off from under my skirt. he didnt bother removing it.

i desperately oulled his boxers down, revealing his hardened cock. i bit my lip as i looked up at him. "youre okay with this, right?"

"yes, please, i need you so bad." johnnie moaned quietly, gripping my hips as i

lined up my entrance with his tip.

i slowly began to sit, just as eager to feel him inside of me as he was. "you dont know how long ive wanted to do this, pretty boy. fuck, you feel so good." i moaned, leaning down to kiss his neck, i sucked and bit, leaving dark hickeys all over his neck and chest.

his fingertips left prints in my hips, which were most likely going to bruise in the morning but the pressure was perfect. he melted under my touch, whimpereing curses under his breath.

i sped up the pace, whispering sweet nothings in his ear. "youre so amazing," i moaned, placing my hands on his chest and tracing his tattoos.

"fuck, if you keep doing that im going to cum even quicker." he admitted, throwing his head back and biting down onto his lip.

i swiftly bounced on his cock, moaning and praises filled the room. "you fuck me so good." i tell johnnie, making his cock twitch inside of me.

"im going to cum," he whimpered and moaned, squeezing his eyes shut.

"cum with me, johnnie." i cursed under my breath.

my body tensed as i felt my stomach swirl and knot. i hit my climax, slowly riding his dick to help him ride out his high as well. he pulled out and came all over my stomach. "fuck." he said one last time, his body going limp.

i dropped down next to him, pulling the covers over our naked bodies. "i needed that so bad." i admitted before placing a soft kiss on his lips.

wrapped in eachothers arms, we slept like rocks.

[thegreatimpersonator]

since y'all seemed to want this.... here's the live notes i took while listening to each song for the first time (bold are thoughts i had during later listens)

fortnight: 

‘i was a functioning alcohol till nobody noticed my new aesthetic’ what the fuck does that even mean…

love the fact she gave post the female collab treatment. don’t wanna hear what he has to say. 

they’re voices sound actually good together? 

some pockets of the melody are catchy

okay i don’t hate this 

ttpd:

her red flags are on fire in this song lol

this seems very half-cooked

also jacks weird mixing continues to plague us all

CHARLIE PUTH???? WHAT THE FUCK WHY HE HERE

tattooed golden retriever??? ……no way

my boy breaks all his favorite toys:

i blinked and it’s half over

this also is like… half cooked and didn’t need to be released tbh

i love the way she sings the second verse tho

down and:

the production does not match the vibe

did tpain produce this

i’m… kinda bored lol

like i have nothing to say this also didn’t need to be released tbh 

this grew on me a lot actually

so long london 

the production is so futuristic? 

oh im obsessed with how she sounds on this one

her talk-singing in the verses is great

honest lyrics without any clunky unnecessary metaphors! a win!!

the fast-paced verses with th slow chorus is really really cool

a favorite so far

daddy i love him

i can barely hear her? the bad mixing continues 

‘growing up precociously sometimes means not growing up at all’ oh yeah WE KNOW

is this…… is this about her dating matty and loving how people hate him… no fucking way she’s this stupid

SHE IS BEING THIS STUPID

‘it’s white noise’ yeah yeah that’s exactly how id describe him  

.... anyway y'all remember when fans really believed the little mermaid theory and this song was supposed to be about how 'joe stole her voice' lmaooo

we will pretend this one doesn't exist!

fresh out the slammer

are we getting another ‘i didn’t cheat technically’ song lol

what is this weird tempo change….

okay kinda catchy

it’s sounds exactly like you are in love at the end….. jack is really out of tricks

florida

‘my friends all smell like weed or little babies’ what the fuck is she even talking about anymore 

i’m sorry but i’m laughing at the phrase ‘fuck me up florida’

again the production sounds so detached from the vocals 

i honestly still have no idea how i feel about this one

guilt as sin

an real instrument?? wow crazy 

okay she’s kinda cute? catchy and fun, love the melody

i love when she goes up at the end of the vocal 

okay…. i don’t mind this one she’s catchy, a little too long and drawn out but cute

who’s afraid of little old me?

what is this production? it’s way too soft to be as threatening as they’re trying for 

why did jack push her vocals back so far when she’s supposed to scream…. that’s ruins the whole thing…. she’s supposed to be screaming and threatening….. not quiet and far away…. hello

this song is trying very hard to be threatening but it’s not... vigilante shit 2.0

‘you wouldn’t last an hour in the asylum they raised me’…………… upper middle-class pennsylvania? 

‘i’m drunk on my own tears isn’t that what they all say, that’ll  sue you if you step on my lawn’ okay bar?

the bridge was good but that’s about it.

i can fix him 

…………… not another matty song oh god

‘i can handle a dangerous man’…… im too stunned to speak this is so embarrassing 

wow taylor really is that girl who like ‘women supporting women’ and then dates/defends a racist bf…. a walking example of white feminism

intersectional feminism found dead.... twice....

loml

okay this is really nice? 

I WAS ACTUALLY ENJOYING THE SONG WHY DID SHE RUIN IT BY SAYING ‘MR STEAL YOUR GIRL’ 💀

if we ignore that one line we're good this is good. im refusing to let that line ruin such a good song

i can do it with a broken heart

‘bitch smile’ why are there so many cringey lyrics on this album lol

what is this song omg why do i kind of like it 

taylor please learn depressed isn’t a synonym for sad 

they recycled the mastermind production 

wait till taylor finds out most of the entire world is sad while they're doing their job and has to pretend they're not

smallest man who ever lived 

oh i think i like this?

‘you said normal girls were boring’ GIRL AND YOU DIDNT IMMEDIATELY GET UP AND LEAVE??? EWWWW??? she's not beating the pick-me allegations

'i just wanna know if rusting my sparking summer was the goal' okay love that line

i like this a lot

the alchemy

no….. no way this is real

i cannot

THE SPORTS METAPHORS WE JOKED SHED DO THAT AND SHE ACTUALLY DID IT OH NO 

touchdown ✅ teams ✅ benches ✅ winning streak ✅ the league ✅

she’s doing…… the worst thing ever this is so laughable 

the corny lyrics are on overload 

‘this time it’s heroine with an e’ didn’t she write folklore? i can’t remember 

that literally was an snl parody of a taylor song

clara bow

love how the guitar sounds… bet money this is an aaron track 

a stevie nicks reference!! a win!!!

i like this one a lot no cringey lyrics yet

nope never mind she name-dropped herself don’t like that

overall really liked it tho

the black dog

i think i like it?? this is kind of what i expected the album to be

okay for once the weird production choices kind of pay off

imgonnagetyouback

kinda catchy? 

she loves a fancy car getting wrecked line

the pre-choruses are the best part 

this would’ve been better without the jack of it all bc he loves a song that doesnt build to anything

this just comes down to personal preference: i don’t like her lighter vocals with jack’s heavy production (ie most of lover lol)

the albatross

a real instrument!!! production that matches taylor’s voice and is well mixed!!! aaron’s arrived!! 

i think it’s solid, has good writing and she sounds great. that's about it.

chloe or sam or…

took me a solid minute to have any semblance of a fuck to know what was going on but okay

okay i love this one

wayyyy more emotive than like… most of the original album

a lot of the 2nd version (or whatever this is lol) are way more emotive, maybe because her voice isnt drenched in reverb so we can actually hear her voice emote better

how did it end

this sounds like an old school adele song? 

i love this one too…. 

her being upset people wanna know what happened but then also feeding it while promoting the album oop 

i love the story of this one it's so refreshing

so high school

THE PRODUCTION is so good ugh aaron never fails 

the man here is a walking red flag girl and the lyrics are ~not it~ but the production is too pretty to hate it

fuck these lyrics are so bad lol

maybe if i disassociate hard enough i can ignore the lyrics and just listen to the production and vibe

give me a karaoke version of this song and we'd be so back

i hate it here

i mentioned disassociation and she made a whole song about it!!!! this one’s mine!!!! 

‘without all the racists’ GIRL HUH

WHAT WAS THE REASON

also... girl don’t act like we don’t know you’re fine with that lololololol

if i had a dime for every time i was liking a song to then have it slapped away because of a bad, out-of-pocket lyric…… 

thank you aimee

this isn’t grabbing my attention 

oh the bridge is interesting 

it’s meh 

i will never be thanking the people that bullied me thanks tho

i look in peoples windows 

what do you mean aaron didn’t produce this??? it’s well-made and has instruments? 

i love this one, again a really interesting and unique concept that's very refreshing to hear at this point when a lot of the songs feel repetitive

the prophecy

aaron guitar!!!! 

she’s nice i like her 

i've really grown to love how she sings this one, the melodies are cool.. however i feel like we've heard the same melody.. like on this exact album... where she upturns at the end of every line...

cassandra 

this seems very…. familiar… idk i feel like we’ve covered this (i mean there are 31 songs we’ve already covered everything lol)

this is such an aaron song, that's a classic 'the national' piano

i like her voice in this one tho, sounds good

peter

oh love i love this

now this? THIS feels the most like a taylor swift song

once again she’s at her best with a simple instrument and emotive simple lyrics

the piano reminds me of champagne problems

the bolter 

i like this! the chorus is so cute

oh i like that ending line a lot!

she’s cute, a little long and drawn out but cute

robin

i haven’t seen anyone talk about this one

welp…. i literally have no feelings toward this one but sounds pretty! 

the manuscript

oh this is soooooooo powerful 

i love this concept 

her ending the album on another introspective album that sums everything up a la dear reader yep yep!!

if you actually read of this ily 💗

[mimez-meme]

More nemuri and hizashi headcanons ‼️💜💛 +some individual headcanons, little angst.

They have kissed on the lips atleast three times. One was for a dare, one once when they were drunk and once was just for fun😭

People thought they were dating for a long time, they did pretend to date at some point but that was because hizashi and nemuri wasn’t sure how the public would react to them being gay and pansexual.

Whenever nemuri uses her quirk too much and a lot of skin is showing or just after she uses he quirk in general, if present mic is there he will give her his jacket.

After aizawa left after graduation they would have a lot of sleepovers, stay at each others houses for a while. It was how they would look after eachother. But it didn’t last long as hizashi started to get more closed off. But whenever hizashi had trouble sleeping nemuri would use her quirk on him and sing a little song. And if nemuri was having trouble sleeping hizashi woud cuddle up with her, give her some headphones to listen to some nice songs to help distract her.

Hizashi knows nemuri liked oboro and hizashi was the one to tell her that oboro liked her back after his death at some point. But he kinda regrets letting her know that.

Nemuri once sent hizashi gay corn as a joke.. hizashi was like “wtf. I didn’t know you were into that..” nemuri spent the next couple of days tryna explain to hizashi that it was a joke and that she isn’t into it. Hizashi was just laughing and making jokes about it

Sent eachother ugly characters and goes “bitch this you??” And edits of eachother or of themselves

Has a lot of ugly photos of eachother on their phones. They use them as threats.

for one Halloween they went as Harley Quinn and the joker, another as peach and Mario. (They actually did a lot of matching Halloween costumes, yes some did include Shouta.)

Raised a virtual pet together (they weren’t the best)

Midnight had the CRAZIEST hear me outs. Like she would say “hear me out!” And it would be like an monster or something 💀 Hizashi had to deal with being told hear me out like 24/7

Voiced over Barbie and Ken moments together

Nemuri use to sometimes borrows hizashi’s clothes, he just dealt with it. (Hizashi does own some baggy stuff guys) and also nemuri did sometimes borrow his suits for like days out if she feels like it 

Got nails done together and after nemuri died hizashi gets his nails how nemuri did as memory. Obviously not the exact same like not fake nails and everything but same colour and something on some nails or one representing midnight.

Nemuri once dared hizashi to show up to his English class dressed as Michael Jackson, enter the class with his music, enter moonwalking and do his little “Ow!” Thing. You bet his ass mic did it. Hizashi then also dared nemuri to show up in REALLY ugly clothes or clothes that look wrecked/dirty, messy hair and everything. Then tell the class a fake scenario to why she’s like this and play sad music as she’s telling the story. She did it.

After nemuri died hizashi went to build a bear and got a bear with her voice in it. He knows it’s ‘childish’ but it makes him genuinely happy sometimes. It brings him comfort.

Nemuri is a good painter. Nemuri paints stuff and shows them to hizashi (Shouta as well but this is about hizashi and nemuri) and if hizashi likes the painting, he’ll keep it. He has atleast 4 of nemuri’s paintings in his house. Hizashi is a decent drawer, nemuri also keept some of his drawings if she liked them. 

Once for Halloween hizashi decided to do a prank on nemuri by dressing up as scream and sneaking inside her house, playing with her lights and doing other scary shit. And since he’s good at impressions as well he managed to do a good scream impression and scare nemuri more. (I suck at explaining but it’s like those basic Halloween YouTube pranks shit idk)

Once nemuri made hizashi dress up as a girl and go to a lesbian club with her

Watched arcane together (yall im so excited for more eps)😍 Nemuri has a crush on victor, Jayce, sevika and Caitlyn, trust🙏 

I headcanon that nemuri has an older brother but she doesn’t see him a lot, so once hizashi organised something with her brother and they surprised her.

Rant about their favourite students to eachother

They played dress to impress together and they SERVED.

After Nemuri’s death sometimes hizashi goes to this one specific bar they use to usually go to for memories but he feels this empty void. Like it’s wrong to be there without Nemuri. He feels so wrong when he goes there alone so eventually he stopped because the memories also did eventually start becoming too much for him.

I headcanon that Nemuri use to work as a makeup artists when she was 18-22? And during those times sometimes hizashi would come visit her and ask for a look, mostly as a joke but he doesn’t mind getting makeup put on him. Whenever he did he would either come out looking like a clown or some kind of horror person. Very rarely would Nemuri do a good/basic look on him. Nemuri would always laugh and say “pay back for trying to distract me from work!” Or something idk

Linked to last headcanon, hizashi also use to work at a bar early 20’s and Nemuri would come visit him and either just talk to him or cause a scene/create chaos. Hizashi and Nemuri would have a laugh about it now but back then hizashi would find it annoying but also kinda funny. Nemuri did get banned from the bar for a bit but hizashi managed to get her back and then Nemuri just decided enough chaos and just came to visit. After zashi quit the job Nemuri and him would sometimes come back or just hizashi would.

They would get a lot of jokey stuff for each others birthday. Like sex books, anything dirty or just weird stuff in general but obviously proper presents to. Nemuri loved scented candles so hizashi would always get her one plus other stuff. Nemuri would always get hizashi anything music stuff or things that would help with his radio show ect.

Nemuri use to be able to carry hizashi when they were younger. (UA years)

Like Nemuri use to send aizawa pictures of cats everyday (canon, which is super cute) she also use to send hizashi memes almost every day and before oboro died she sent pictures of furries to him everyday😭

[dreambigdreamz]

assigning LaDS men their TTPD theme songs and specific lyrics

go and open up the entire album with the LaDS in your mind uwu i swear this is too much angst but like not the whole song but vibes <333 someone please write fics on these

Fortnight — Zayne

(I was supposed to be sent away but they forgot to come and get me/ I was a functioning alcoholic till nobody noticed my new aesthetic)

(All my mornings are Mondays stuck in an endless February/ I took the miracle move-on drug, the effects were temporary)

(And for a fortnight there we were together/ Run into you sometimes, comment on my sweater/ Now you’re at the mailbox, turned into good neighbours)

The Tortured Poets Department — Rafayel

(You left your typewriter at my apartment/ Straight from the Tortured Poets Department/ I think some things I’ll never say like “Who uses typewriters anyway?”)

(But you awaken with dread/ Pounding nails in your head/ But I’ve read this one where you come undone/ I chose this cyclone with you)

+ The entire chorus and bridge 💀

(At dinner you take my ring off my middle finger and put it on the one people put wedding rings on/ And that’s the closest I’ve come to my heart explodinggg 🎆 🎆 )

My Boy Only Breaks His Favourite Toys — Xavier

(Oh here we go again/ The voices in his head/ Called the rain to end our days of wild/ The sickest army doll/ Purchased at the mall/ Rivulets descend my plastic smile/ But you should have seen him when he first got me)

(There was a litany of reasons why we could have played for keeps this time/ I know I’m just repeating myself/ Put me back on my shelf/ But first pull the string and I’ll tell you that he runs because he loves me [he loves me ✨ sings in delulu ✨])

(Just say when I’d play again/ He was my best friend down at the sandlot/ I felt more when we played pretend/ Than with all the Kens/ Cuz he took me out of my box)

Down Bad — Sylus

(Did you really beam me up/ In a cloud of sparkling dust?/ Just to do experiments on/ Told me I was the chosen one/ Show me that this world is bigger than us/ Then sent me back where I came from/ For a moment I knew cosmic love)

(Did you take all my old clothes/ Just to leave me here naked and alone?/ In a field in my same old town/ That somehow seems so hollow now/ They’ll say I’m nuts if I talk about the existence of you/ For a moment I was heaven struck)

+ The chorus and bridge like, justlistennn

So Long, London — Rafayel

(I saw in my mind fairy lights through the mist/ I kept calm and carried the weight through the rift/ I pulled him in tighter each time he was drifting away)

(And you say I abandoned the ship/ But I was going down with it/ My white knuckle dying grip/ Holding tight to your quiet resentment)

(You swore that you loved me but where were the clues?/ I died on the altar waiting for the proof/ You sacrificed us to the gods of your bluest days/ And I’m just getting color back into my face/ I’m just mad as hell cause I loved this place)

(For so long, London/ Had a good run/ One moment of warm sun/ But I’m not the one/ So long, London/ Stitches undone/ Two graves, one gun/ You’ll find someone ...)

But Daddy, I Love Him — Sylus

(insert the entire song just kidding)

(He was chaos, he was revelry/ Bedroom eyes like a remedy/ Soon enough the elders had convened/ Down at the city hall/ “Stay away from her”/ The saboteurs protested too much/ Lord knows the words we never heard/ Just screeching tires and true love)

(Thinking it can change the beat/ Of my heart when he touches me/ And counteract the chemistry/And undo the destinyyyy/ You ain’t gotta pray for me/ Me and my wild boy and all this wild joy/ If all you want is gray for me/ Then it’s just white noise cuz it’s just my choice)

(I’m telling him to floor it through the fences/ No, I’m not coming to my senses/ I know he’s crazy but he’s the one I want)

Oh Lord I haven’t listened to Fresh Out The Slammer 💀

Florida!!! — Sylus

(The hurricane with my name when it came/ I got drunk and I dared it to wash me away/ Barricaded in the bathroom with a bottle of wine/ Well, me and my ghosts, we had a hell of a time/ Yes, I’m haunted but I’m feeling just fine)

(Little did you know/ Your home’s really only the town you’ll get arrested/ So you pack your life away/Just to wait out the shitstorm back in Texas)

(I need to forget, so take me to Florida/ I’ve got some regrets, I’ll bury them in Florida/ Tell me I’m despicable, say it’s unforgivable/ What a crash, what a rush, fuck me up, Florida/ It’s one hell of a drug)

Guilty as Sin? — Zayne

(My boredom’s bone deep/ This cage was once just fine/ Am I allowed to cry?/ I dream of cracking locks/ Throwing my life to the wolves/ Or the ocean rocks/ Crashing into him tonight/ He’s a paradox/ I’m seeing visions, am I bad?/ Or mad? Or wise?)

this is literally MC in Zayne cards no question no judging we love our personal rocking chair babe

(I keep recalling things we never did/ Messy top lip kiss/How I long for our trysts/ Without ever touching his skin/ How can I be guilty as sin?)

Who’s Afraid Of Little Old Me? — Rafayel(?)

Just vibes.

I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can) — Sylus

(The smoke cloud billows out of his mouth like a freight train through a small town/ The jokes that he told at the bar were revolting and far too loud)

(They shake their heads saying “God help her” when I tell ‘em he’s my man/ But your good Lord doesn’t need to lift a finger/ I can fix him, no really, I can/ And only I can)

(The dopamine races cross his brain like a six-plane Texas highway/ His hands, so calloused from his pistol, softly traces hearts on my face/ And I can see it from a mile away/ A perfect case for my certain skills set/ He had a halo of the highest grade/ He just hadn’t met me yet)

(Good boy, that’s right/ Come close, I’ll show you heaven if you’ll be an angel all night/ Trust me, I can handle me a dangerous man)

Did I just type out the entire song oop-

loml — Rafayel

(Who’s gonna stop us from waltzing back into rekindled flames?/ If we know the steps anyway/ We embroidered the memories of the time I was away/ Stitching “We were just kids, babe”/ I said “I don’t mind, it takes time”/ I thought I was better safe than starry eyed/ I felt a glow like this, never before and never since)

(Who’s gonna tell me the truth when you blew in with the winds of fate/ And told me I reformed you/ When your impressionist paintings of heaven turned out to be fake/ Well, you took me to hell, too/ And all at once, the ink bleeds/ A con-man sells a fool a get-love-quick scheme/ I felt a hole like this, never before and ever since)

(You shit talked me under tables, talking rings and talking cradles/ I wish I could un-recall how we almost had it all/ Dancing phantoms on the terrace/ Are they second-hand embarrassed? That I can’t get out of bed/ Cuz something counterfeit’s dead)

I Can Do It With A Broken Heart — Xavier

(There in her glittering prime/ The lights refract sequined stars off her silhouette every night/ I can show you lies ✨ )

(Cuz I’m a real tough kid/ I can handle my shit/ They said “Babe you gotta fake it till you make it” and I did/ Lights, camera, bitch smile/ Even when you wanna die/ He said he’d love me all his life/ But that life was too short/ Breaking down I hit the floor/ All the pieces of me shattered as the crowd was chanting more)

(I’m so depressed I act like it’s my birthdayyy everyday/ I’m so obsessed with him but he avoids me like a plague/ I cry a lot but I am so productive, it’s an art/ You know you’re good when you can even do it with a broken heart ✨ )

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived

umm…. imma be saving this for later because …. we can all sense a betrayal of smth coming right? or is it just my bestfriend’s pessimistic arse again—

The Alchemy — Sylus 💯

(What if I told you I’m back?/ The hospital was a drag/ Worst sleep that I ever had/ I circled you on a map/ I haven’t come around in so long/ But I’m coming back so strong)

(So when I touch down/ Call the amateurs and cut ‘em from the team/ Ditch the clowns, get the crown/ Baby, I’m the one to beat/ Cuz the sign on your heart said it’s still reserved for me/ Honestly, who are we to fight the alchemy?)

(Where’s the trophy? He just comes running over to me.) — please let us take a moment to appreciate how sweet this line was, even in TS standards

The Black Dog — Sylus

(I move through the world with a heart broken/ My longing stays unspoken/ And I may never open up the way I did to you/ And all of those best laid plans/ You said I needed a brave man/ Then proceeded to play him until I believed it too)

(Six weeks of breathing clean air/ I still miss the smoke/ Were you making fun of me with some esoteric joke?/ Now I want to sell my house and set fire to all my clothes/ And hire a priest to come and exorcise my demons/ Even if I die screaming/ And I hope you hear it)

imgonnagetyouback — Sylus

(Whether I’m gonna be your wife or gonna smash up your bike, I haven’t decided yet/ But I’m gonna get you back/ Whether I’m gonna curse you out or take you back to my house, I haven’t decided yet/ But I’m gonna get you back)

(Bygones will be bygone eras fading into gray/ We broke all the pieces but still want to play the game/ Told my friends I hate you but I love you just the same/ Pick your poison, babe, I’m poison either way)

The Albatross — Rafayel

(Wise men once said wild winds are death to the candle/ A rose by any other name is a scandal/ Locked me up in towers but I'd visit in your dreams/ And they tried to warn you about me)

(Cross your thoughtless heart/ Only liquor anoints you/ She’s the albatross/ She is here to destroy you/ Devils that you know/ Raise worse hell than a stranger/ She’s the death you chose/ And all this terrible danger)

(And when that sky rains fire on you/ And you're persona non grata/ I'll tell you how I've been there too/ And that none of it matters)

hands down the best fitting song and ship by far aaand we’re gonna be getting some zayne angst for the next few ones

Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus — Zayne

(If you wanna break my cold, cold heart/ Just say “I loved you the way that you were”/ If you wanna tear my world apart just say you’ve always wondered)

(If the glint in my eye traced the depths of your sigh/ Down that passage in time back to the moment I crashed into you/ Like so many wrecks do/ Too impaired by my youth/ To know what to do)

How Did It End? — Zayne

(We hereby conduct this post-mortem/ He was a hothouse flower to my outdoorsmen/ Our maladies were such we could not cure them/ And so his touch that was my birthright became foreign)

(Say it once again with feeling/ How the death rattle breathing/ Silenced as the soul was leaving/ The deflation of our dreaming/ Leaving me bereft and reeling/ My beloved ghost and me/ Sitting in a tree D-Y-I-N-G )

So High School — Xavier

(I feel so high school every time I look at you/ I wanna find you in a crowd just to hide from you 💖)

(And in a blink of a crinkling eye/ I’m sinking, our fingers entwined and cheeks pink in the twinkling lights/ Tell me ‘bout the first time you saw me/ I’ll drink what you think, and I’m high from smoking your jokes all damn night/ The brink of a wrinkle in time/ Bittersweet sixteen suddenly)

I Look In People’s Windows — Zayne

At this point I’m cutting onions for Zayne’s story. Maybe other albums will have better song choices for my babe 🥹🙏

(I had died the tiniest death/ I spied the catch in your breath/ Out, out, out, out, out, out/ North bound I got carried away as you boarded your train/ South, south, south, south, south, south/ A feather taken by the wind blowing/ I’m afflicted by the not knowing so)

(I look in people’s windows/ Transfixed by rose golden glows/ They have their friends over to drink nice wine/ I look in people’s windows In case you’re at their table/ What if your eyes looked up and met mine/ One more time)

(You had stopped and tilted your head/ I still ponder what it meant now, now/ Now, now, now, now/ I tried searching faces on streets/ What are the chances you'd be downtown, downtown, downtown/ Does it feel alright to not know me?/ I’m addicted to the ‘if only’)

The Prophecy — Zayne

(Hand on the throttle/ Thought I caught lightning in a bottle/ Oh, but it's gone again/ And it was written/ I got cursed like Eve got bitten/Oh, was it punishment?)

(Please, I’ve been on my knees/ change the prophecy/ Don’t want money/ Just someone who wants my company/ Let it once be me/ Who do I have to speak to, about if they can redo the prophecy?)

I will cry if the creators don’t give at least one happy ending to one of them

Peter — Xavier

(The goddess of Timing once found us beguiling/ She said she was trying, Peter, was she lying?/ My ribs get the feeling she did/ And I didn’t wanna come down/ We said it was just goodbye for now)

(And sometimes it gets me/ When crossing your jet stream/ We both did the best we could do underneath the same moon/ In different galaxies)

(And I won’t confess that I waited but I let the lamp burn/ As the men masqueraded/ I hoped you’d return with your feet on the ground/ Tell me all that you’ve learned/ Cuz love’s never lost when perspective is earned)

The Bolter — Sylus

(He was a cad, wanted her bads/ Just like any good trophy hunter/ And she likes the way it tastes/ Taming a bear, making him care/ Watching him jump then pulling him under/ And at first blush, this is fate/ When it's all roses, portrait poses/ Central Park Lake in tiny rowboats/ What a charming Saturday/ That’s when she sees the littlest leaks/ Down in the floorboards/ And she just knows/ She must bolt)

Robin — Xavier

(Strings tied to levers, slowed down clocks tethered/ All this showmanship/ To keep it, for you/ In sweetness/ Way to go tiger/ Higher and higher/ Wilder and lighter/ For you)

(You got the dragonflies above your bed/ You have a favorite spot on the swing set/ You have no room in your dreams for regrets/ You have no idea/ The time will arrive for the cruel and the mean/ You’ll learn to bounce back just like your trampoline/ But now we’ll curtail your curiosity)

The Manuscript — Rafayel

(Now and then she rereads the manuscript/ Of the entire torrid affair/ They compared their licenses He said, “I’m not a donor but I’d give you my heart if you needed it”/ She rolled her eyes and said “You're a professional”/ He said, “No, just a good samaritan”)

(The only thing that’s left is the manuscript/ One last souvenir from my trip to your shores/ Now and then I reread the manuscript/ But the story isn’t mine anymore)

Yes I left out Clara Bow, I Hate It Here, thanK you aIMee and Cassandra. These are really amazing songs, very TS girl-coded and we stan all the lyrics <3 they just didn’t particularly fit oh oh maybe

Clara Bow — Sylus

(This town is fake but you’re the real thing/ Breath of fresh air through smoke rings/ Take the glory, give everything/ Promise to be dazzling/ The crown is stained but you’re the real queen/ Flesh and blood amongst war machines/ You’re the new god we’re worshiping/ Promise to be dazzling)

I Hate It Here — Zayne

(I hate it here so I will go to secret gardens in my mind/ People need a key to get to/ The only one is mine/ I read about it in a book when I was a precocious child/ No mid-sized city hopes and small town fears/ I’m there most of the year cuz I hate it here)

(I hate it here so I will go to lunar valleys in my mind/ When they found a better planet, only the gentle survived/ I dreamt about it in the dark the night I felt like I might die)

thanK you aIMee — Xavier

(All that time you were throwing punches, I was building something/ And I couldn’t wait to show you it was real/ Screamed “thanK you aIMee” to the nightsky and the stars are stunning/ And our town, it looks so small from way up here)

Cassandra — Rafayel

(I was in my new house placing daydreams/ Patching up the crack along the wall/ I pass it and lose track of what I’m saying/ Cuz that’s where I was when I got the call)

(I was in my tower weaving nightmares/ Twisting all my smiles into snarls/ They say, “What doesn’t kill you makes you aware”/ What happens if it becomes who you are?)

[t00them00n]

Bf!eren headcanons.2

More headcanons/masterlist

- he doesn’t know how to take care of his hair well enough so u have to teach him a few things bc hes lowk clueless

- he’s easily mesmerised by hair masks or any slightly non ordinary beauty products LMAO

- he get weirdly excited to blow dry ur hair for u when its wet just because🤷‍♀️

- this thought is also copied by one of the headcanons from @jaegersdevil but he would defo take big fat ass bites out of ur food when u let him try some 😭

- when hes sick hes in denial for some reason and walks around pretending he’s fine until hes on the verge of dying and someone has to force him to let someone else take care of him

- contrary to popular belief he is not super big on pda he’s more playful than affectionate with pda but when drunk hes extra pda affectionately lol

- he doesn’t like letting u take public transport (tbaw ref LMAO💀) he feels proud of himself or wtv when he picks u up from places/drops u off

- he has a good work ethic idk what people generally think but i think he’d do good academically with armins help😭 and so u guys would obv study together

- u would initiate study sessions together but he wouldnt want to focus and would try talk u out of studying so u guys could do smt more exciting😭 he can study and is smart but would rather do better things if he’s spending time with you

- he 100% would make dates every once in a while that are out of the ordinary and fun

- he doesn’t necessarily plan dates theyre more spontaneous like if u guys are just on a walk and he sees a cool place he’ll get u to go with him

- u guys essentially live together,, not rly but ur place is his and his place is urs lol like ur both at each others a lot like despite the nice dates, most of ur time together is domestic

- he has his own music taste (diff to urs) but he doesn’t listen to music as often as u so he lets u take over speakers/aux etc so he always has songs that aren’t his music taste stuck in his head

- he is good at keeping gifts/surprises a secret verbally but lowk makes it too obvious 😭 like he’ll ft u in a store and show u options asking ur opinions on stuff but say its for armin or smt

- he’s just very bad with excuses/calculations like that LMAO

My requests r open for anything u can ask me any specific headcanons for eren or any character aswell!! Tysm for reading 🫶🫶

[ievutebebe]

~Purple Rain~

Summary – You are at a party, where your friends like always had disappeared and you were stuck on the couch in between couples making out pretending to be on your phone. But it all changes in the kitchen.

Pairing – Pre-outbreak/no outbreak Joel Miller x F! reader

Warnings- MDNI 18+, use of alcohol, reader is drunk, but everything is consensual, unprotected p/v sex, use of ‘daddy’ kink (like a lot), fingering, chocking, inexperienced reader, reader is in her early/mid 20s and Joel is in his late 30’s-early40’s. Creampie, rough sex, squirting. Joel is good at convincing and praising. Anything else? Let me know.

Word count- 4,4K

RATING- 18+

A/N- Was listening to purple rain and my brain came up with an idea for a fanfic so wrote it all down. Also, this is my first time writing smut so apologies for any bad grammar or if you spot any mistakes. I actually was going to scrap this but decided to just go for it💀

Promise that part 2 of the fangirl fic is coming soon.

Inspired by~ Purple rain of course and @amandaapascalll love her brain so much.

RULES: READ THIS WHILST LISTENING TO PURPLE RAIN

You are lonely at a party full of people, but you are avoiding everyone by pretending to be on your phone because of your anxiety.

You lift your head up to look at the crowd, your eyes land on a handsome man and he makes eye contact with you, but when he does you look away. When you try to peek again, you see that he has company. Sipping on your drink you realise that you need a refill so make your way to the kitchen.

On your way out you bump into this mysterious man and spill your drink all over his white shirt.

“Howdy?”. He says whilst standing in the door frame, but it was too late as you weren’t looking where you were going.

“Oh, my goodness! I’m so sorry”. Wine splashes all over his shirt, exposing his muscly chest.

“It’s alright darling”. He says rubbing your shoulder.

“Come in here I will clean it, I feel awful”.

 “Look it’s really not a big deal darl-“. you grab his hand and lead him into the kitchen where you find a cloth and damp it in the lukewarm water.

“Sit right there for me”. You point to the chair.

“Alright bossy pants”. He abides and sits right where you told him to.

You make your way to him and crouch in between his legs in attempt to rub off the wine stain on his shirt which, by the way is not going well. Fuck, fuck, fuck! Why is he hot? Stay focused, stay focused.

“You really don’t have to do th-“ he tries to speak.

 “Shh” you shush him by pressing your finger to his soft pouty lips.

It is your go to phrase when you are drunk, you like to shush everyone. There is no way you would have this much confidence if it weren’t for alcohol running in your system, but you aren’t complaining.

“So, my names Joel by the way, how about you?”. Joel breaks the silence.

“My name is Y/N”. You look up making eye contact with him.

“That is a lovely name rhymes with Miller don’t you think?” He shoots you a wink.

“Mmhm not a bad pick-up line”. You try so hard to not smile like a schoolgirl, if it was supposed to work on you it sure did, but you weren’t about to make it obvious and out yourself.

“It’s not a pickup line, it’s the truth” he smirks as he is staring down on you in between his legs, making you fluster and this time you are unable to hold back a smile from forming on your lips, so you look down and continue your task of getting the damn wine stain off.

As you are rubbing the stain, you place your other hand onto his thigh to keep yourself sturdy, without paying any attention your fingers brush on his crotch and he groans.

“Joel are you okay?” you stop for a moment and look back up at him.

“Yeah, I’m ok, just um your hand.”

“Oh! shit sorry.” You look at your hand and realise that it is right on his private part, you quickly move it but can’t help your face from turning red as your cheeks burn in embarrassment.

“No need to be sorry, quite enjoyed that to be honest.” He adjusts his jeans.

Did he just flirt? No way can’t be, FUCK I must be imagining things. He is so fucking hard, ain’t no way. Focus, focus, focus. Don’t look... You try as hard as you can to resist the temptation of your thoughts from taking control.

You give the shirt a few more pointless attempts in hopes that the stain magically disappears, but it doesn’t. You decide its best to give up and stop embarrassing yourself by pretending that you can get the stain off.

You let out a huff. “Oh gosh it’s really not coming off, I’m so sorry Joel” you say biting onto your lower lip whilst looking up at him and batting your eyelashes.

He lifts your chin to face him “Well, it is a wine stay after all, look it’s okay”.

He gets up, giving you his hand to hold onto whilst helping you get up. “Give me this let’s put it down, I have a better idea.” He takes the cloth from your other hand and throws it into the sink.

“What idea?” You focus your gaze on what he is doing.

“How about I just take it off”

~faint purple rain song starts to play in the background~

He starts to seductively unbutton his shirt at a slow pace and then takes it off throwing it onto the floor.

“Holy shit” you close your eyes. “What is it?” “Oh, someone is shy.” He laughs playfully.

“You are, you are naked.” You squint your eyes as hard as you can to resist from looking. “No, I am not honey.” “It’s okay you can look, no need to be shy.”

~The music is now louder and both of you can hear it~

His warm ochre eyes are glinting from the faint light above as he steps forward to you and extends his hand. “Shall we?”

You grinned wider as you took Joel’s calloused hand and held it with both of yours.

“We shall.” Your voice grows quieter as you take a step closer to him, holding his hand tightly. ~I never meant to cause you any sorrow~

His eyes seem to sparkle even more at your quick response - the wrinkles under his eyes seem to fade away as he pulls you in closer, chest to chest. ~I never meant to cause you any pain~

Joel’s face lights up at your reaction, his gaze softening and his ears flushing a slight shade of pink. You fail to stifle a small laugh and your cheeks match the colour of his ears. ~I never wanted to be your weekend lover~

Both of you keep traversing through the room, your footfalls drowned out by the sound of bubbling laughter.

“May I?” Joel grins expectantly, lifting your hand above your heads. ~I only wanted to be some kind of friend, hey~

Whatever answer you planned on giving him dissolved in giggles as you twirl under his arm.

“I’ll take that as a yes, honey.” He blushes deeper as you steady yourself, meeting his gaze. A gaze full of emotion - adoration, awe, and something more. ~Baby I could never steal you from another~

Joel clears his throat and looks down to your feet, his moving slower as he thinks for a moment.

“Joel?” You skid the rhythm to a halt after asking.

“I just…” Joel leans in closer, his eyes flitting to yours. ~It’s such a shame our friendship had to end~

You don’t say anything instead just get on your tiptoes and place your hands around his neck until your lips meet his, he kisses your lips gently and slowly, but the kiss quickly grows hungrier and passionate.

~Purple rain, purple rain~

He picks you up without breaking the kiss walks towards the door, locks it and then sets you down on a table lifting the hem of your dress up to your hips.

His hands are gliding up your thighs caressing them in stroking motions closer to your core. He kisses down your neck making his way to your chest and uses his hands to free your boobs.

He uses his finger to glide it from your neck down to your nipple. He then rubs your nipple before using both of his hands to squeeze your boobs and returning one of his hands back to your thigh.

His calloused hand on your thigh makes you whimper, you try to close your legs and your pussy clenches on nothing, but he stops you by using his other hand to spread your legs back open by squeezing on your thigh roughly, whilst his other hand caresses your cunt through your soaked lacy thong that is drenched in your juices.  ~Only want to see you underneath the purple rain~

“What baby?”. “Nuh uh, you want me to stop?”.

“Don’t stop please”. You say breathlessly as he rubs your g spot.

“Such a needy girl”.

“Yes Joel, need you so bad”.

“So sensitive”.

“Yes, daddy”.

“Baby you’re so wet, is this how bad you want me?”.

“Yesyesyes, Joel” “Please, need your fingers”. You plead.

He pulls your thong off and slides his digits into your folds using them to rub your pussy in gentle circular motions to gather your slick.

Once there is enough wetness, he slides two fingers into your pussy curling them as they dissolve inside of you, deep inside your abyss, reaching his knuckles, you arch back a little and close your eyes.

Moans and whimpers escape from your mouth as he continues to pump them in and out of you hitting the spot that makes your toes curl.

“Such a tight little pussy baby”.

“Mmm yess daddy”.

Moaning feels up the whole kitchen, all that comes out your mouth is “Joel” over and over again.

“Remember if it’s too much at any point just say red light, okay?”

“Yes, that’s okay Joel”.

He is working his two fingers in your pussy, placing the thumb on your g spot and rubs it.

When he places his thumb on your aching clit and continues to deeply finger you, it makes you cry out in pleasure and your pussy flutters around his fingers pulsing now which makes him finger you at a quicker pace, your hips move to ride his fingers as you are approaching your release.

“Joel I’m close”. “I know darlin’ can feel you squeezing my fingers”.

“You’re doing such a good job baby”. He places his other hand onto your belly to have a tighter grip on you and takes your hard nipple into his mouth sucking on it and giving it a lick as he let goes.

“Come on honey, come for daddy”.

“Come all over my fingers”.  

“Soak em baby, want to taste your honeydew”. It doesn’t take long until you come undone soaking his fingers.

“Fuck! I knew you would taste good, as sweet as honey, I could spend hours between your pretty pussy”. He pulls his fingers out of you and puts them in his mouth.  

“You did so well, now you are ready for daddy’s cock aren’t ya? Going to let me ruin that pretty pussy of yours?” he reaches down to unbuckle his belt and unzips his jeans, letting them drop and frees his cock out of his boxers taking it into his hand giving it a few strokes it and moves closer.

You let out a gasp from seeing how thick his cock is and that it is already hard when he lets it sprung free.

"Go on, take it pretty girl".

You take his cock into your hands pump him until his pre cum leeks, you’re about to lean in and take his cock into your mouth when he stops you by pushing you on your back until you lay flat on the table.

“See how hard you make me baby?” “This is all you and your sweet little pussy”.

“Mhmm, Joel need you so bad, please”.  You brush your thumb over his tip.

“Not yet baby, you have to be patient”. “Daddy is in charge here”. “Be a good girl for me”.

“Yes daddy”.

He taps the tip of his cock on your sensitive throbbing pussy, drenching it in your arousal.

Then moves his cock up and down your pussy, teasing you at your entrance, making it seem like he is about put it in but instead he just slides back up to your g spot and slowly moves it down again repeating it a couple of times.

“How about I, yeah you like that baby?” “You like how I feel huh, dirty little slut” “Say it” he uses the other hand to choke you slightly to get a response out of you.

“Yesyesyes Joel fuck please” “I need you inside, please daddy, pleasepleaseplease”. You beg as you can’t handle anymore teasing, your pussy is aching for him.

“That’s what I like to hear”. “I like to hear you begging to be fucked like the whore you are”.

 “You will depend on daddy’s dick, baby”.  He speaks in a possessive and low voice.

He leans on top of you as you lay flat on your back on the kitchen table, he uses both of his hands to grab your waist to slide you down closer to his hard as a rock cock whilst holding you in a firm grip to position himself at your entrance.

“Shit baby you’re so damn tight”. “Mmm, feel so good”. He shuts his eyes as he enters your tight pussy. 

He thrusts in deep but not all the way, but it is enough for you to moan and arch making you slide up and his cock slip out.

He puts it back inside, but you place your hand on his chest trying to push him off a little because of the pain and not having time to adjust to his length. You’ve never fucked a guy with a big and thick cock as Joels, you’re not sure you can take it. It’s so big you can feel it stretch your tight walls and cling to his cock.

“Oh nuh uh baby doll no escaping, you can take it”.

“Joel I-“ you slide up again.

“Nonono don’t think so baby, you stay right here” He positions himself at your entrance and pushes in deeper this time then before using both of his hands to keep you in place not letting move not one bit as his hands dig into your bones.

“And keep your eyes open for me”. He commands.

“Shit! Joel I can’t” you see stars for a moment, and everything goes black in your vision.

“Your dick is too big, I-i cant Joel” you stutter “It hurts”.

“You can take it sweet girl I know it”. His thrusts slow down and he fucks you at a slower pace.

“Gotta get used to it baby”. “I will be gentle, relax for me” you abide to his command, as you completely give in, the pain fades and ecstasy takes over. His cock is stretching and moulding your tight pussy is addictive and any pain you feel is titillating.

“Atta girl just like that”.

“J-joel-“.

“Doing so well for daddy aren’t ya?” “Good girl” he whispers in your ear. “Daddy is proud of you, you feel so good baby doll, your pussy is perfect like it was made for me”.

He sucks on your neck, pretty sure it will leave a mark, but you are way past the good girl shit right now it doesn’t even matter, a problem for another day.

He is fucking you so good you didn’t think anything could make it even better but him whispering into your ear and feeling his breath and warmth on your sweaty body only made you feel more intoxicated and orgasmic.

It’s like your pussy was made for him, his dick was sculpting your pussy and stretching it as if it was her first rodeo.

Although Joel hasn’t pushed himself all the way in yet, it sure didn’t feel like it to you, you didn’t think there was more to come.

“I’m going to come” You cry out.

“Hold on baby can’t let you come yet, not even in all the way baby”.

“What? Joel it’s too big I can’t take more”. Your eyes go wide as you look down at his cock seeing that he is barely thrusting past his tip. Your lack of experience at sex really is catching up to you.

“Yes, you can, sweet girl”.

“I will slide it in a little further, is that okay?” He brushes his nose against yours gently, moving deeper into your hole and you let out a moan.

“Yesss daddy”.

“Fuck daddy, fuuuck!”. You feel his warm hairy balls slam against your ass cheeks, making your pussy clench whenever his cock disappears into your body.

“Good girl, doing so well”.

He feels your pussy clench around his cock “Not yet, daddy’s not done with you”. “Come here”.

He gets up, pulling out up to his tip, holding your hand to help you sit up, when you do, he picks you up gripping onto your thighs just below your ass and you place your hands around his neck. You choke out a sob when he sinks your pussy down onto his veiny shaft, your head falls back, and eyes roll to the back of your head.  

Joel is pounding into you at a brutal pace, pushing himself all the way into you before pulling out only to slam straight back it. His balls strike your ass with each thrust adding to your building orgasm making your pussy tighten and thighs ache as your legs swing in the air.

His cock is reaching so deep inside of you that you can feel him in your lower belly, the only words you manage to choke and cry out in between the moans are “Joel” “fuck! daddy” “don’t stop”.

It’s buried so deep that you struggle to keep your eyes open and they water making your vision blurry while your nails dig into the back of his neck.

Joel isn’t being merciful at all, he uses his hips to thrust in you with his thick shaft to stretch and fill you up. Your pussy makes a sloppy sound as he uses your entrance however, he pleases, and you feel a sudden urge to pee.

“Whose pussy is it baby?” “Speak”.  

“Yours daddy, only yours”. You manage to choke out.

“Anyone fuck you like this before?”. Joel slams all the way into you and stops moving for a moment before pulling out and thrusting straight back in making you squeal.

“UHHH! no daddy”. “AHH- only you”.

“Mhmm that’s what I like to hear baby doll”. Joel grits his teeth.

“Yes, daddy just like that”. “Yesyesyes-yes”.

You can feel him hitting your cervix, your body tensing and pussy pulsing with pleasure every-time he pounds into you.

“Joel, Joel, Joel fuck fuuck!” “I-I I’m going to c-“.

“Come for me, I ain’t going to last much longer”. You know he is close as his thrusts are now even faster and messier.

“Fuck, I’m going to come baby”. “Where do you want it?”

“Inside, I’m on a pill”.

You come undone drenching him as your muscles tense up and his release follows shortly after one last powerful thrust.

He empties his balls deep inside of you, and you feel his warm liquid drip and flood your walls.

You don’t even realise it but when you come you completely drain him in your release and some of it had dripped on the kitchen floor.

He doesn’t pull out straight away, both of you are in the post sex haze panting trying to come down from your highs.

Breathing evens out and he finally puts you down gently onto your feet and you tremble on your limp legs and grip onto his bicep as your feet give in, Joel reacts quickly and wraps his arm around you to help you stay up.

“Ooop oop oop, I gotchu baby girl, you okay there?”.

“Yes, just can’t really feel my legs and everything is spinning woah-” you giggle.

“It’s okay baby girl you’re all drunk from daddy’s cock aren’t ya?”

“Yes daddy”.

“Go sit for me baby, I will get you cleaned up”. “Can you do that for me?” He pulls his pants on and buckles his belt.

“Yeah”. You make your way and slump into the chair.

But you are still intoxicated from sex that your sight is still blurry. You can’t help but replay the sex that you just had with Joel in your mind.

Joel ignited something within you, him pounding into you and his balls slapping against your ass with each thrust made your body burn with desire and lust for more. There are so many more ways you would love to fuck him or even let him fuck your tits and have him come all over them. Suck his cock until his cum drips deep down your throat. You’ve only just fucked Joel minutes ago, but you are already looking forward to fucking him again. He fucks like a god with years of expertise.

He grabs your panties from the floor and makes his way to you.

“Open your legs for me baby”.

“Hey, hey! don’t fall asleep yet baby”.  Joels tone is quite and gentle.

“Sorry, what did you say?”.

“I will get you cleaned up; can you open up for me?” “Oh yes, sorry” you can’t help but smirk looking down at Joel.

“It’s alright”.

He used your panties to wipe your pussy clean from both of your releases and then used the warm cloth to clean you up. He doesn’t give you the panties back instead he stuffs them down the pocket of his jeans without you noticing.

You pull your dress down and put the straps back on to hide away your boobs.

“S okay daddy’s gotcha” he wraps his hands around your waist.

“Did so well for me baby” pecks your cheek.

“Mhmm”

“You okay baby doll?”

“Yes, just feel tired”.

“It’s ok baby, let me get you some water”.

“Here you go and um so have you got a boyfriend darling?” Joel feared the answer to this question, but he had to know, a part of him hoped that he a chance with you and that he could see you again and ask you out on a proper date to do right by you.

“No” you choke on the sip of your water before answering.

“Easy, easy now” “The only thing you should be choking on is my cock”.

“Good one Mr Miller”.

“How come a girl like you doesn’t have a boyfriend, look at you baby doll, you are perfect”.

“I guess I just prioritised my studies, I wasn’t looking for a boyfriend it’s not a priority for me, you know”. A lot of guys tried so hard to get your attention and constantly asked you out on dates, but none of them felt homely or long-term type of relationships so you just focused on getting your degree. However, one look at Joel made you rethink your ways, this instant attraction to him didn’t compare to any of your silly crushes you had before it was more intimate and nerve cracking. No guys had ever made you nervous the way Joel did, you stuttered in front of him.

“Any guy would be lucky to have a girl like you, but I get it”.

“How about you, Mr Miller, you got a girl?” you ask dreading what his answer may be in anticipation.

“No darling I don’t”.

“Well, I guess that means we are both single” you say in relief.

“Yes, baby I am all yours and now that we both established that we are single, how about I give you a ride home”.

“That’s very kind of you Mr Miller” you tease. “Oh please, just call me Joel”.

“Alright daddy Joel it is”. You giggle.

“Come on let’s get out of here”. He grabs your hand and walks out of the party holding your hand in his.

Tagging: @kateispunk @amandaapascalll @brilliantopposite187

Wasn’t sure who to tag so sorry if you didn’t want to be tagged🥹

Thank you for reading! Stay hydrated and may Joel bless y'all.

[voidcat]

knock knock yes hello i’d like to know abt that narumi x medic!reader wip if u don’t mind -w- and of course the kaiser wip too <3

hello hello sweetiepie rye:3 i never mind when it's you <3

hmm with the narumi wip reader's medic identity is to set smt in the beginning and isnt as important tbh. it's an accidental workplace meet cute basically. at the hospitals, as staff we usually take some unusued and unlabeled rooms to be ours. if it has a sink of sorts, with few gadgets and devices, we turn them into rest rooms / impromtu kitchens basically ahahaha

so medic reader and the medical crew has smt similar at the hq. which narumi runs into while escaping the wrath of hasegawa (are we even surprised). reader was preparing to make pizza for a colleague's exciting news to celebrate so that first moment of someone who likes to be alone to cook vs someone who's often aloof and doesnt pay others any attention is their initial meeting and the rest builds up from there. narumi pretends to play games on his phone and watches reader the whole time and yes he devours half the pizza so poor reader has to bake more to make up for the loss.... i think the rest of medical staff does try to ban narumi from their wing bc he starts often crashing at their break room as if its his own😭😭 from then on few more minor moments of truly seeing one another and basically thats all fdukhgfkıhfkd

for kaiser.... eh this one's more self indulgent for sure but not fully focused on him if it makes any sense. reader is there at first as part of a program they had joined with few others but decides to stick around after it ends. some talks with ness regarding magic in the world and science not being what his family makes it out to be and whatnot. some minor talks with noel noa (he lets you have his chocolate pudding on friday evening meals ^^) noel does keep reader around bc he wants to see how an outer influence will affect the u20 team and reader does treat them like rats observed in an experiment at the beginning so it does work out somehow 💀 (also insulting football as a sport to noel noa's face.....) so few prominent scenes with ness and then with kaiser (if u saw my prev message abt calling kaiser a "despicable human" and him just focusing on the "human" part of the insult and not the rest🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ so between kaiser and reader its a little bit of baring their fangs at one another and calling each other out on their respective bullshit. thats what you get for getting inside ness' head (<- kaiser's excuse) idk if i get to this fic it will be more like one of my older typical fics so idk how well it'll do but We Shall See

also theres a drunk dry humping thing in my drafts w him still that i rewrote twice and gave up halfway lol. also i think there was one more i was gonna say here??? but cannot think of it rn 😭 i hope you're having a lovely day wifey, i miss u the kids miss u pls drop the peach boy and come home<3

[lotusarchon]

new year yet same ole you

face it ali, youre such a fuckup it doesnt matter how much you "change". people dont fucking like you, theyll never like you and all these attempts to make them just wont work

didnt you say that yourself :( "the same thing i did to you i did to my friend and now he hates me" like the little crybaby bitch you are

least one saved themselves by calling it quits 💀 wonder how long itll take the others...knowing you it wont be that long huh 🤔

A wise man once said: Aren't you tired Poseidon, it's been ten years how long will this go? We're both hurting from losses so why not leave this here and just go home?

Mariin ...I don't know why you're doing this. It's been so, so unbelievably long. The last conversation we had, I was drunk out of my mind and sad I lost one of my friends. Are you seriously holding onto that and believing you have some influence over me just because I came crying to you because you reminded me of that person?

I don't expect you to forgive me. Your feelings are valid, and I'm not gonna pretend what I did to you and others was okay. You're right to be angry and you're right not to forgive me but come on, isn't this just pointless now?

You're so insistent you want to make my life miserable....but so what? What exactly do you intend to do except spread rumours, pretend to be me, involve innocent people and then bring up old wounds hoping to get a rise out of me?

It's been so long Mariin. So, so long. You keep hanging around, being a nuisance in my anons or dms, and then waiting for drama to start to show your head, like you did last August with Neveah and her crew, and right now. Is it not tiring for you? Do you not take the hint everytime I've blocked you and ignored your attempts?

It's tiring. I'm tired. How long do you intend to keep this up?

You're right that you know me. You're one of the only people that know me better than I know myself, but I know you too. And I know that even if you got what you wanted, you're not gonna be happy. You'll still say my death or something wasn't enough, that I need to burn in hell. For all I know you'd probably pull another stunt and celebrate me not being around. You're never, ever gonna be happy.

You do know I'm gonna disappear from here one day right? Eventually I'm gonna leave LMK, which IS soon because this fandom is the fucking worst, and I'll never be here again, right? I'm gonna find a new interest, make a new account for it, and stay there for a few months or years until. I'm gonna change my name, so no one can recognize me, and live my life anew. I might make new friends there and never look back to any old ones.

Then what. What the fuck are you gonna do then? How the fuck are you gonna find me? Who the fuck are you gonna mention and harass hoping to get them to blame and hate me for it? Who the fuck will you get to bother?

You're wasting your time and mines, dude. It's been too long, this is unnecessary.

Keep being angry, I can't blame nor stop you. But don't expect me to pay attention and care anymore.

Its pointless. All of this are pointless. Your words hurt and you're right, I am a fuckup but you know what? At least I know I'm a fuckup. At least I know I've done shit and at least I'm aware of what I've done.

Unlike you. Just get some rest or go to hell, Mariin. Get a hobby or something. Just. Go. Dear god

You yap so fucking much oh my fucking god get a life you dumb, whiny pissy ass bitch your entire birth was a mistake, your hair smells and you're such a red flag any boyfriend you have will leave you for someone else you fucking creep. You're so obsessed with me it's fucking insane am I that attractive to you or do you just get aroused by being a bitch?? Fucking dumbass whore

[lesbonym]

Damn I prolly lost what little cool factor I still had cause my blog is just me being a goof ball for the most part, you prolly also didn't notice it cause it's my sfw blog cause I am still setting up my nsfw side blog but I keep forgetting to actually do anything with it

Also feel free to pull on my hair needy boy, it'll just make me bite on you and toy with you more, I would love to spend a looong time between your thighs turning you from needy nym into fucked out nym

Also >\\\\\\\\\\\\\< ruuuuuuuuuuuuuude, eye contact isn't something I'm the best at (prolonged eye contact in like a serious situation almost always makes me want to laugh just cause it feels weird, like tickling my brain of sorts) but when I am flustered I almost always try to hide about it cause there can be no witnesses to me being blushy (there are so many witnesses but if I hide then I can pretend no one can see how flustered I am) especially cause generally when I am pretty flustered my Domme will look like they want to eat me alive (or eat me out till I die) and it makes me even more flustered which compounds until I have no choice but to behave (I'm always a good boy for you cause you don't enjoy brats, but I love being a little shit to dommes who enjoy brats taming, unfortunately I'm not always good at it cause I care about my partners and so I can barely even mildly inconvenience them before I start behaving again, but I like to pretend I am super mischievous)

Also I know I already sent you a happy birthday message but I'm sending you another one

Happy birthday!!!!!

I wish I could teleport cause then we could go to a queer bar together and I'd buy you a drink cause you are hot, but I have a low alcohol tolerance and so if I ever try to do shots with people I am sloshed by the time I take 4 (drunk me is incredibly snuggly but also has no filter in a super embarrassing way, -i have sung an impromptu song about stegosaurus-)

-🦠

Hehe, in the nicest way possible, you were more cute than cool when you came to my asks, baby. I figured it was sfw, and I'll go follow the nfsw when you finish it. I just wanted to be moots >:3

God, I would die for some bites and marks on my thighs rn. I'm so freaking desperate that I'd love to get my pretty boy between my thighs so I can feel so good. I think you'd really enjoy fucked out Nym //////////

I'm not the best with eye contact at all, haha. I think I'd be extra bad at it during sex and stuff cause it's so freaking vulnerable. But I can understand how someone can find it hot! That's so cute how flustered you can get. Just giving me so much ammo to use against you, pretty boy

Thank you for the extra birthday wishes! I meant to answer this yesterday, but I think I dozed off while typing my answer to this 💀. I dont live in a city with many gay bars, but I would love for you to come and bring me to some! I need to try some different alcohols, so I think being with you would make me feel comfortable enough to try. I think I have a little higher tolerance? I haven't tried enough to be sure.

Now I need to hear about the stegosaurus song!

I do wanna bring the thing up about brats again because I don't want anyone thinking I don't like brats or anything. Even I can get bratty with dominant moots that I interact with. My personal boundaries with bratting have changed a bit, and I now know that I need to know the sub a little bit. Just figuring out personalities and never going too far is easier when I know the other person. If I can't figure out how to get a brat to listen to me, I tend to get irritable and think I'm doing something just completely wrong. Overall, I'm fairly neutral on brats, but I can't handle super serious brats that tend to need a big punishment to fold. I'm just not a fan of giving punishments like that, so I'd rather not have brats come in that are expecting that and get disappointed.

Though, as easy as I find it to fluster you, I definitely think I would be fine with you bratting

[mikuni14]

Only Friends Ep 6

Oh, but they're all nasty now 🥳 Even Sand, who seemed so cool, could throw the guy he had a crush on under the bus when the desire for revenge and to emerge victorious in this stupid and old fight with Top, the desire to have the last word, turned out to be stronger.

Ray and Sand Ray definitely won this episode. I wrote from the beginning that for me Ray was the most withdrawn, bland character who was nothing but a background for others. And it's quite possible that this effect was intentional, because this episode made it clear that Ray IS the backdrop for his crew and even for Sand who used him without any consideration. He is invisible, he is in this group probably because of his money, because I bet that if he were poor, with his drunkenness and detachment, he would have been excluded from this group a long time ago. Let's face it, money makes a whole difference in how drunks and drug addicts are treated 🤷‍♀️ But beyond that, Ray is invisible and the worst things can be said about him, even in his presence. No one noticed the tension between Ray and Boston, the way they looked at each other with hatred at school, during meals, ALL THE TIME. Likewise, what Chueam says about Ray is rude and I'm not surprised that she was the first victim of Ray's outburst when he finally had enough. In general, Ray was treated terribly by his so-called friends who behaved towards him as if he had no feelings and could be easily insulted without any consequences. Because he's a good sport and these are just jokes, right? Additionally, no one notices his depression or his new relationship with Sand. I really like that Ray used the weapon used by Boston - the truth served raw ✨💀 And I love that no one escaped his wrath, not even Sand (calling him whore was, I must admit, very satisfying). (The only thing missing is that Ray is unable to look at Mew other than through rose-colored glasses and sees no flaws in him. Even after he hit him. But that's just me, I simply don't like Mew :P)

It's very good that the series also showed Sand in a negative light, he has been shown too well so far. And here you go, data theft, lies, pettiness, taking advantage of people who trust him :) I hope that seeing Ray on the road to self-destruction will bring him to his senses and reflection. Personally, I think that for their well-being, Ray and Sand should limit their contacts with the rest of this increasingly chaotic crew.

Boston and Nick Poor Nick, every time he thinks he has a chance for a relationship with Boston, a new obstacle pops up 😉 Ah, Boston. His wierd honesty is so incredible. And it turns out that he wanted Top, just like that. He chose him and got him, because fuck you, that's why. And he probably didn't intend to do anything about it, it seems he didn't intend to use it against Mew, he looked genuinely concerned when Ray told him he knew about it. It's amazing that out of this whole team, Boston is the most honest person, who makes things clear all the time and is right about every single person. In fact, the only problem is with his way of presenting the truth - he did not do it nicely and sensitively. Just like Ray suddenly became the "bad guy" when he did the same thing.

Mew and Top I liked Top, who didn't deny what he did, didn't minimize his guilt, didn't lie. But the more I see him, the more I wonder what is so "top" about him... Mew felt a bit inconsistent in this episode. First, he presents himself as a fulfilled person who has plenty of love and doesn't have to look for it, doesn't have to prove anything. Then he makes a whole show of pretending his interest and love in front of Top to triumphantly prove his cheating. What for? I know it was a good scene, because it was, but the fight with Ray, then the whole.. acting in the bedroom… somehow it doesn't fit the story and how Mew is being presented. Because I'm 99.99% sure that Mew will give Top a second chance and will probably do something stupid as a revenge, and that fits Mew, who for me has been a contradiction of the image created from the very beginning. Many things are said about him, by others and by himself, but imo it's very simple, he just wants a specific guy, he wants Top, and that's why he has and will continue to look for excuses to be with him. And unfortunately, living in lies and delusion about oneself kind of poisons the soul, so I think that in his case it may be his villain original story 😃 And, hmm, maybe this scene in the bedroom is the first manifestation of this "poisoning of his soul"? Breaking bad? Maybe this makes some sense after all? 🤔

What this series does well is the butterfly effect, those little bad things that turn into big bad things. That they take on a life of their own and get out of control. Did Nick expect his little recording would cause so much trouble? Did Sand expect his little trick on Ray to cause such chaos? Did Chueam's expect, that her rude, thoughtless comments towards Ray would endanger her own relationship? It is also about underestimating others, their feelings, their habits, which ends exploding in their faces. Boston underestimates Nick, everyone underestimates Ray, Mew underestimates Top, Top underestimates everyone. Chaos is already spiraling beyond control. Woohoo! 🥳✨💀

[mylovesstuffs]

This is my first time actually reviewing something like this so forgive a rookie like myself.

First of all, this fic took the ‘boring blind date’ trope and annihilated it within like… the first 800 words. The tension was immediate, and not the fake rom-com tension, but that are we bantering or flirting or about to ruin each other? tension>>>>>> Reader came in smug, braty sass, sharp jabs, and Wonwoo matched that energy with confidence. A duel of personalities, but make it hot.

Their dynamic is honestly the most fun I've read in a while. Mutual brat + dom who won't give you the satisfaction but also lives for your mess. And the fact that she holds her ground just makes it hotter. She never simpers, never gives him total control, but she lets him earn it. And so does he.

Now I'll just try my best to scream about the dialogues/parts that I usually would in the comments lmao.

For all you know, she just set you up on a date with Antonio Banderas.— oh please 😭

“Why the rush?” The man immediately says, pushing an untouched glass of water your way. “I don’t mind that you were late, I was just really hungry.”— lmfao, the honesty 😭 he knew, it was the food.

without a stupidly handsome man in front of you that has, probably, less interest than you do.—the underestimation 💀✋🏻

“You’d be a lot less dull if you did.” You throw back, eyeing a waitress as she heads over. — oh this turned into banter...

“Not that you’d know what that is or anything. And you?”— BROOOOOOOO

He has never been on a date where he is criticized, nor has he ever criticized a date himself before.— yeah, I fr, never read a fic or book where two strangers on a date who literally does not know eachother, are picking out on eachother

“Are you suggesting I bring you home with me?” He looks at you with a face you can’t really read.— yes.

Offense taken.— oh shit 🤭

Wonwoo sighs at your constant critiques of him,— but yeah, she's a bit to critical him

You’re a liar. You definitely wore them just in case.— 😭😭😭

He stares at you while he does it, his hair falling in his face at the movement of what he’s doing waist down. For some reason, that does it for you,— it does it for me too... It's just too sexy

“Crawl to me,” — ARBFDSAAAAHHHHCTHGFTJJJJJ EXCUSE ME??? YES SIR

“you can choke all you want babe, but you’re gonna have to not be this cock drunk if you want to pretend that you’ve got the upper hand.” — I love how he always puts her in her place but also,she never backs down. Love their dynamics.

Oh, right, he still hasn’t even fucked you yet.— that's what I was thinking 🤭

“We had lunch a few days ago.” he adds, backing you up. It’s just that the lunch wasn’t exactly like–you know, at a restaurant, and maybe it wasn’t food…— I CHUCKLED 🤣 I FR CHUCKLED 😭✋🏻 THIS IS COMEDY GOLD

The chemistry was electric, the dialogues were snapping like a live wire, and the pacing made those 8.8k words fly. Reader’s characterization was so fresh—charming but sharp, cocky without being cartoonish—and Wonwoo matched her energy so well, it felt like verbal foreplay from start to finish. It gave chaos, it gave confidence, it gave control in the most deliciously filthy way. Definitely saving this one for whenever I need a reminder that smut can be smart, funny, and feral all at once.

the bore next door (j.ww)

Jeon Wonwoo is not dull, nor is he the clean and polite neighbor that your mother assumed he was when she set you up on this awful date. 

or the one where wonwoo takes you home on the first date and renders you unable to walk, hoping to god that you don’t expose him to your parents.

ao3 | minors dni! | kindly leave feedback and reblog, i will kiss your forehead so fucking fast if you do. 

WORDCOUNT― 8.8k

PAIRING― wonwoo x afab reader

CONTENT― strangers to fucking immediately to the possibility of dating later, reader is a teacher but this is not a school setting, mocking and making fun, sneaky sex, flirting and bullying in the same instance, cocky wonwoo, um…they’re kind of competitive in bed

WARNINGS― small mention of other teachers cheating on their spouses (very tiny mention), the resistance of pressure to fall in love/have children

NOTE― I repurposed an old wip for this because putting this mf in the main role hit harder than it should have. that being said, don’t expect me to write men often like this, i just thought it would be neat to make him take control. this is not proof read.

smut tags under cut:: 

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