#and i know its hard to write bcs aphmau was a self insert and its hard to write a proper character for Yourself

[vyladromeave]

But yknow the one thing that bothers me time and time again, because its not just an issue in Rebirth its in S2 and S3 too (and has probably leaked its way into non mcd stuff as well but I dont watch those) is Aphmau’s autonomy as a character. Unfortunately i care about Aphmau as a character more than anyone rightfully should and so i have strong thoughts and opinions about this.

I think I’ve talked about it before in relation to Aphmau being forced into Irene’s role (in the middle of an arc tackling why Aphmau becoming Irene and taking up her mantle/powers is perhaps a BAD THING nonetheless.) is terrible for her capacity to drive and to choose; Aphmau is actually an incredibly independent character. She is stronger with friends of course but in the past when alone, she was always able to hold her own. She is self-made, everything she is is something she chose to be. Until suddenly she isn’t, which is upsetting. 

But this isn’t the first and only time Aphmau’s autonomy as a character is taken from her. The longer MCD goes on, the more Aphmau’s interactions with others change from things she choses to happen, into things being enacted upon her. And things happening to her isn’t bad in theory, but it is when she is no longer truly driving the action of the story. She doesn’t get to just Do things anymore, its one goose chase after the next. You get kidnapped and now you’re a Mief’wa and now you’re stuck on an island and now your sons are kidnapped and now you’re Irene and you can’t do anything about it whether you want to or not. And 9 out of 10 times she doesn’t even get to resolve these issues herself either, there’s always something else that comes in and does it for her. 

And its just... frustrating that nothing that happens is her choice anymore. Nothing that’s happening is being affected by the actions she is or could be taking. In S1 she establishes an entire town and alliance of villages for herself, literally defeats the two biggest superpowers in the region in battle ultimately because of her own efforts into the ordeal. She brings Phoenix Drop back from rock bottom. She doesn’t even really choose to be the lord in Rebirth. She’s forced into the role. She doesn’t even want it. Doesn’t even view herself as it. In S1 people did just sort of start viewing her as the lord, but she didn’t fight it because ultimately she was Fine with it, she wasn’t forced into it she could’ve stopped if she wanted to. But she didn’t because she wanted it. Because she was good at fixing things and she enjoyed helping people. And in Rebirth she's the one who brings up the idea technically and yet it feels like less of a choice than before. And it hurts.