#and i just now went 'OH SHIT THEY'RE ENDING IN DECEMBER AGAIN'

[theminecraftbee]

i literally just realized that the hermitcraft season 9 ending is two days before big moon anniversary. btw. if anyone is wondering how that timing works out. and wants to be really normal about it with me. you know. for fun,

[marmotsomsierost]

I have been sick since fuckin. What day. The fuckin 16th of december is when this bullshit started. It is JANUARY FUCKIN FIFTH. That saturday i woke up, coughed (not super unusual with this persistent stupid postnasal drip crap) so hard i puked all of the little i had in my stomach out (super unusual) and had a scratchy throat for the rest of the day. Didn't think anything of it. Was feeling kind of but not really better towards evening. Then, decorating the tree, cough drop in mouth, i go to fling a string of lights up and inhale said cough drop, which lodges just below my thyroid.

I do not die. The dog and the husband are not convinced. I use actual words to mention the not dying thing. They are...slightly more convinced.

Sunday i wake up with sensation in throat, not like pain, not raw, just like...there's something there that isn't normally there. Have minor cough and very raspy voice. Sinuses mostly clear. I wake up on the 20th and have literally no voice. I need my voice to be able to triage people. I call out sick. I go back the next day, it's fine. Still little cough, mostly clear sinuses, just suddenly a tenor. This continues until the 25th.

Dinner on christmas i find annoying to eat. It's like my throat has decided it's full and the stomach goes 'eh okay sure let's stop' in weird agreement. I go to work the next day.

I have turned into the crotchety old man you never see out of scooterdress with snus in his lip and a suspicious possibly-sentient coffee mug in one hand and the other hand tucked into the front of his bibbed pants. Basically Bjørn Sundquist. Anyway.

I now have a coughing wheezy rasp where by the end of the night i will cough all the air out of my lungs, die, gasp in air, cough that out, die again, then am able to breathe again. Unfortunately not shiny and chrome. Still. I call out the next morning, have a video visit, get some antibiotics and an inhaler, we're good to go right.

Wrong. Turns out pretending really really hard that you don't have a fever does not actually get rid of said fever. I call out again. I'm off work the next three days anyway, that gives me a nice block of time to finish my antibiotics and get back to normal.

There's no tech for the two days before new year's day so when i show up despite sounding like a zombie everyone is all 'oh thank god you're here' and 'we have a tech?? We have TWO TECHS?? Yeah!' But about four hours in i keep getting the concerned face and side-eye of concern and avaunt foul beast from the rest of the ED. The doctor tells me i sound worse than half of the patients. The PA listens to my lungs and says something like 'wow with that cough i figured your lungs would be shit but they're actually really clear'. The loud triage nurse says 'well hell marmot's been coughing for weeks and she's still here' loudly several times in earshot of patients whose chief complaint is 'cough since this morning' and the night shift triage nurse tells the charge nurse that i can stay in the back, he wants to keep the front plague-free.

I almost call out yesterday. I had the phone in my hand but an alert went out that the evening tech called out and wednesday was a shitshow so i was like okay, i'm not that bad, i'll go in.

I should have called out. I have alarms set for when to take the sudafed and the cough medicine and the inhaler because time is fake at the best of times and this ain't the best of times. I survive to the end of the shift. I blow my nose before i leave and my ears pop- the right clears fast, the left clears by the time i get home.

I'm off today. Cough is demonstrably better in frequency if nothing else, even without regular doses of medicine. I get home from dropping samus at the vet (she's fine) and blow my nose again, and ears pop. Left ear won't clear. It doesn't hurt but it is driving me absolutely batshit insane. It's like juuuust on the edge of fucking with my equilibrium. I've tried gum. Decongestant. Antihistamines. Soak in hot bath in our dwarf-ass tub as best i can. Am about to try broiling in a shower.

I'm so tired of this crap. Where is bones with a magic lung-fixing ear-clearing pill when you need him.

[hhappylliving]

Just me feeling sad for myself post

I left and visited a friend where I used to live before going down to Atlanta for a concert.

I've been at my parents house for a year now. I went to 1 concert December of last year, literally took a train down the same day of the concert and left the next morning.

I went to my first concer this year- and I know concerts aren't for everyone and they're not a part of everyones life, but they're a part of my life. My first concert/s were when I was studying abroad because there were people I actually wanted to see touring. I went to 3 concerts in the span of 1 month.

I found the magic in them going to 2 kpop concerts in 2019. I bought tickets in January of 2020 for another concert. When concerts occurred again, I went to 9 in 2022. At the least I had to drive 3.5 hours to get to venues. Most of them required 5-6 hours of driving. 2023 my life changed and I still went to 4. This was the first concert of the year. At the end of July. and its a group I LOVE. It's a group that's been my number 1 most listened to group for 2 years. This was my 2nd time seeing them.

I get a "So I'm assuming youre glad you went?" from my dad. and that's about all. So lets say I start talking about my time anyway? I'm met with literally nothing. I even made it kind of a joke and said "you want to see the ugliest lightstick before it gets put back in its box?" my mom looked up from her phone. My dad didnt. my dad is the one that literally came and connected his phone to the tv to show off (crappy) videos he took at the concert they went to last year that they happened to get tickets to for free because a coworker has year round tickets and they couldn't make it. he's the one that "forces" me to look at the pictures he takes, makes me look at the differences in the before and editing of them. Shows them to me when he gets them printed. Shows me his record discs when he buys them.

and yet he will not have the same courtesy for me. the literal one time I actually attempt to show something off.

this is why I dont tell my parents anything I'm actually interested in. because I'm not pushing children out of my vagina and children become the main hobby of my entire life, my hobbies aren't important. because I have no interest in owning a house and dont care about decorating or redecorating my interests dont matter. one time I wanted to look at the albums at the store- as literally every kpop stan does- and my mom goes whats that? and I said oh nothing, its a group I dont listen to. she latched onto that and bought that exact album. (and for anyone that says "its the thought that counts" its not. thats the theme of my life. I'm not actually listened to. its not enough that its "a thought")

I'm not jealous, I'm not a person who feels jealousy and I am so happy for others, but sometimes I really can't but help to feel jealous when I have friends who have parents who actually give a shit about their hobbies and interests. I have a friend who goes to concerts with her mom. I have a friend who is older herself and gives a shit about her own kids interests and will bring her kids to concerts and even pay for them(adult children) to get to have the fun extra experiences kpop brings just because it's their interest. I'm so happy for them. and I wish I could relate. I already accepted this as a teenager, and probably even as a kid, but sometimes I'm still allowed to be sad for myself.

[oookaline]

Miss You - Lyric Analysis

by me because im bored.

yet again because whats more fun than going over lyrics for the 2736843th time? Absolutely nothing! and if you thought of something, you're lying to youself

So, miss you was a song released in the 8th of December 2017.

Some backstory before.

ObViOusLy, the whole babygate thing, add a lil cherry on top with the Elk split up (23rd march 2015 - 2 weeks prior) and them getting back toguether in 2017 (17 Feb). All of this aswell as Danielle and Brenda in the middle of it.

K with all the smol context under us we can already look around and see that just by the title 'Miss You' people had speculated it was for Eleanor, and since Louis said :

I wrote this song about a time in my life when I was going out partying every night. In hindsight throughout that time I was pretty numb and just going through the motions. Deep down it was always in the back of my mind that what I really missed was the girl that I loved

which obviously links the song to two occurences:

Babygate: 'was going out partying every night' (since we know for a fact he literally went partying every week)

The split up from Elk

but the thing is right- lmao Danielle just danielled away. No mention whatsoever.

This, all of this, and JUsT that quote that Louis gave us already destroyed like- half the narrative of 'Really good friends w an oops baby' and (obviously) just tarnishes yet again the 'engagement' route they were going to take. BUT IT ALSO leaves Danielle behind as if she didn't even exist!!

Which by the way things look, she might not've anygays.

The music video was made in LA

which again (If I could I would literally kiss louis brain) links it to Babygate.

Now the lyrics

verse 1:

"Is it my imagination?

Is it something that I’m taking?

All the smiles that I’m faking

“Everything is great

Everything is fucking great”"

Obviously we can literally hear the sarcasm on the last two lines. 'All the fake smiles' reffering to all the pap pics he did while the lead up to the Holy Conception. Aswell that him reffering to the scene as 'imagination' or 'something that he's taking' could emphasize that its so bad, so unreal that he thinks its a joke and that he's either too drunk or thinking it.

Going out every weekend

Staring at the stars on the ceiling

Hollywood friends, gotta see them

Such a good time

I believe it this time

Again, him reffering to him being papped every week on a club with the first line, the 'stars on the' ceiling reffering to the lights in night clubs, 'Holywood Friends' reffering to Annas, and specially reffering to Snoop Dog and his launch party, which was when this picture happened:

pre chorus:

Tuesday night

Glazed over eyes

Just one more pint or five

Does it even matter anyway?

One of the fucking smartest lines in my opinion, him reffering to tuesday. Which is him reffering to the day the first article of him being out partying came out:

The next are him reffering to what always happened; drinking and feeling shit. 'does it even matter anyways' is his subcontious trying to tell him to give in and just do what they wanted him to do, saying that it doesn't even matter because either way the end will be shit (and bla bla bla, but again, its his subcontious. not him.)

chorus:

We’re dancing on tables

And I’m off my face

With all of my people

And it couldn’t get better they say

the first two lines are ofc reffering to the feeling of being drunk, 'dancing on tables' and 'of your face' are ohrases people use to refer to drunken states. The 'people' Louis is reffering to is his escorts; people paayed to carry out what is supposed to happen that night (bodyguards, pr managers, paps, in cases the girls aswell he appears papped with), and the line 'couldn't get better they say' has both the connotation of this being the LA dream, of always partying, knocking chicks up, drinking to your hearts desire- aswell as having the connotation of 'his people' telling him it will not get better, so don't try to oppose it. (which links back to the previous verse 'does it even matter anyway')

We’re singing 'til last call

And it’s all out of tune

Should be laughing, but there’s something wrong

And it hits me when the lights go on

Shit, maybe I miss you

'singing til last call' refers to how late he spent in the clubs and 'out of tune' suggest again the drunk state. 'Should be laughing but there's something wrong' is again, elluding to that LA dream partying state that should've been what he was feeling, since that's what the media said. The 'lights go on' is reffering to the paps, when they take pictures (and obviously the miss you is talking about eleanor because he'd much rather stunt with her than be here lmao ) And yes, the miss you is reffering to Harry.

There doesn't have to be a reason and obviously it could also be a stunt line in the song- but let me explain what I think: We can see Louis' state by the end of the paps shoots, how he slowly just becomes VERY tired towards the last few ones. And keep in mind he was also touring with 1D WHILE HE PARTIED. Which meant it was Show-Party-Show-Party with things thrown between it aswell. Giving close to little time to spend w Harry.

(Pretty sure that's not at all what happened, its just what I think- it was such a fucking busy thing, I'd not be surprised if they both were stressed and not having enough 1-1 time)

Verse 2:

Just like that and I’m sober

I’m asking myself, “Is it over?”

Maybe I was lying when I told you

“Everything is great

Everything is fucking great”

First line reffering to how in the morning, next day of partying, he was again sober- for the shows- and him asking 'is it over' refers to how he just wanted it to be over with, all the patying and paps.

The two last lines could signify him talking to someone about his life- I'd say that the 'you' here does not mean Harry- but someone else- them asking "How's your life going" and then him going "Great Great, yeah- fookin great ykwim"

something along the lines of that you get me.

And all of these thoughts and the feelings

Chase you down if you don’t need them

I’ve been checking my phone all evening

Such a good time

I believe it this time

the first and second lines here are again, Louis talking about his subcontious; that 'this will turn on us' reffering to him and Harry. About a (probable) fear that this will make a strain in their relationship and stuff.

(a/n: kind of like how a lot of shippers unlarried while babygate was happening because 'louis couldn't cheat' or how a lot of shippers say they broke up during that time because 'Harry couldn't take the stress' and stuff)

Im not saying they broke up not that he cheated. What I'm saying is that there was a fear that this would make them break up- he says 'chase you down' which has the animalification of the wolves chasing down the pray to kill them etc.

Bridge:

Now I’m asking my friends how to say “I’m sorry”

They say “Lad, give it time, there’s no need to worry”

And we can’t even be on the phone now

And I can’t even be with you alone now

the first line links to what I said about Louis' subconcious; this would be that constant need to say 'I am sorry' for something that isn't his fault or something that he can't control, and then the second line goes on to say that he doesn't have to worry because, again, its not his fault and Harry undertands that.

Now the 'We can't even be on the phone now, I can't even be with you alone now' refers to their public appearance, on how other than that Paris interview there are no other interviews with just them two, on how we didn't get a Larry hour on 1Dday... It refers to them literally being unable to say anything to each other because of management.

Oh, how shit changes

We were in love, now we’re strangers

I WANT TO ALIENATE THESE TWO LINES BECAUSE OF HOW FUCKING LOUT IT IS.

this one links ti the last two of the previous, again on their public image (His and Harry's) about how they were once in love (fetus) but now they're strangers (the mortal enemies narrative)

When I feel it coming up, I just throw it all away

Get another two shots 'cause it doesn’t matter anyway

And to top off these last two lines of the bridge is him linking all of this back to the start of the song: 'is it my imagination, is it something that I'm taking' with 'when I feel it coming up, I just throw it all away'; when the thoughts that this is all fake and once he wakes up or stop imagining its all going to be better (aswell as with the connotation of over partying and vomiting) but at the same time him making himself stop those thoughts because he knows this is reality. And then round back again with the repetition of 'doesn't matter anyways' with it feeling like a dead end to him.

[stardust-static]

Puppy update 🥰

So if you didn't know I got to bring this guy home early which was about two and a half weeks ago now. We weren't supposed to get him till 8 weeks which was the 16th of December, but we got a call when he was six weeks saying that he's eating solid food and no longer needs his mama. Bailey and I did research and found that puppies usually still need a mama dog to learn mannerisms from and usually they're still nursing at that age. However since he was eating solids and I have three mature age dogs to teach him, & I'm an experienced dog owner who will pretty much be home with him all the time. I thought that it should be fine. Also he was sleeping outside in a pen.. these dogs are typically farm dogs and sleep outside with the farm animals to protect them at night. I was worried he might get too used to that and not want to sleep in the house.. some people get GP'S that are a little older and they usually won't sleep indoors as they want to patrol at night. We want our guy to be inside at night. These are typically working dogs that want a job, but mostly we wanted him to be a pet and his "job" is to protect my other dogs incase of coyotes and us incase of intruders. So it wasnt such a bad deal to get him when he was still so young and impressionable. We agree to come get him. Took a spur of the moment two hour drive. Got out to the farm in the middle of no where. He handed me the other boy. I knew he wasn't mine because I had been staring at this picture of my puppy for weeks. I set it as my wallpaper.

As you can see my guy had speckled nose (its fading now :( ) so he brings me my baby who was just sleeping and he's holding him up to me by his neck fat and he's crying and I grabbed him and he nuzzled his little face into my neck and that was it. We got in the car and I held him close to me and he shook and shivered half of the way and I just kept comforting him. He flinched everytime I touched him clearly not having much human contact. Half the way home he started warming up to me and was giving me kisses and wagging his tail. Bailey and I fell in love with him. We could not handle how adorable he was. Then we finally made it home. I set him in the garage and he was still so goofy and unsure of me. Then he came to me and let me pet him and love on him. Then one by one I let the other dogs in to meet him. They didn't really think much of him at first. Next we gave him a bath which he clearly never had. He smelled like urine and there was so much dirt in his fur. He was a little angel in the bath. The next day he became more confident and started to play with all his new toys and the eskies were pretty jealous. I've made sure to give them all equal amounts of love so no one feels neglected. Wally as always is a lot of work in that department. He's got his behavior problems which have heightened since the puppys arrival. We're working on that. Fast forward to today and Winston adores him. They play so cute together and Winston will actually let the baby cuddle him. Wally just.. I don't think he knows what a baby is. He's very rough and quick to anger. Bailey and I always say that he would have made a great only dog, but he's definitely not so all we can do is correct his behavior when he's mean to the puppy. The puppy cares very little about Wally's hissy fits though. I just don't want him to learn any bad behaviors from Wally. He hasn't yet. He's honestly just a big goofy teddy bear. Such a happy little guy. He's already doubled in size. Everyday I look at him and notice him getting bigger. Today I noticed that he's getting his long coat hairs coming through. He no longer fits in our kitchen sink that we washed him in the first night. Since we did get him so young he is very attached to me. I can not leave him alone. I've been sleeping on the couch with him when Bailey has to work in the morning and he's a sweetie. He snuggles up to my face and gives me kisses to wake me up when he has to potty. He's perfect. The only difficult thing is potty training. The worst part of raising a puppy for me. Especially now that we have carpet in every room. Luckily my mom gave us her commercial carpet cleaner. I put that baby to use last night. It's coming along though... Anytime now I'll have him potty trained. I had my mom babysit him today while I worked and she said he was an angel and didn't potty in her house once so thats good! I just watch him like a hawk and try to catch him before he goes. I'm always letting him outside and hopefully he'll learn how to use the dog door soon. We just got that set up for him, though we will need a bigger one eventually.

Now let me tell you about the stressful ass day I had yesterday and about how I just wanted to lock myself in my room and cry at the end of it all-- because of my pets.

First we wake up and I let the dogs out, and discover that Wally is leaving our yard. The gate on the back side of our property is a metal bar gate with chicken wire over it. Wally pushed the chicken wire out of the way and slipped his skinny little weasel body through the bars. So we went to buy a heavier duty wire fencing to put over the metal fence. Bailey said we should bring Toby cause we want to socialize him and also get him used to the car. So we bring him and on the way home Bailey says we should put him in the trunk of my suv so he could be more comfortable and because he was scratching Bailey up on the way to home depot with his little puppy claws. So we put him back there and we're on our way to get food and Toby is in the back screaming his head off. Then we go "whats that smell?" And I look in my rear view mirror and I see our puppy Toby with his feet hanging over the backseat, paws covered in shit and he's just jumping on everything back there that he can, just really smearing it everywhere. So I'm like WE NEED TO GO HOME NOW!!! just trying so hard not to puke. Bailey is laughing his ass off. Then Toby jumps over and into the back seat. I don't know with what strength suddenly. Winston and Wally have never managed to get out of the trunk space. So now he's making his way to me and I have to reach back and just hold him in place. Theres shit all over my back seat now. I'm crying. I keep gagging. Then Bailey starts to get queezy. We're both not keeping it together. So we eventually get home. Bailey cleans the car and I clean the puppy. Then I have to clean Winston because he ate my mascara while we were gone and got it all over himself. Then as I'm letting the dogs out my indoor cat bolts out of the house for the third time this week. I didn't even go after her. I just said "so be it!". I was having such an annoying day. Then Bailey goes to get us food and I put puppy in the kitchen because I need to vacuum and shampoo the carpets. Puppy screams his head off the entire time cause he hates being confined. The cat comes home an hour later. Bailey and I eat and get to work repairing the fence. Then puppy pees later on the newly shampood carpet. Then Bailey and I get dinner and put puppy in the kitchen again. We're just there at the dinner table eating our Chili's takeout, Bailey goes to get something out of the kitchen and I just hear him go "oh...no." I just looked at him and go "did the puppy shit in there?" and he goes "yup" I say "is it everywhere?" And he says "yuup..."

There was no peace to be had that day.

The dogs woke up and chose chaos.

So today Bailey went to work and so did I.

It was the first time since getting the fence put up that I let the dogs have free roam without me being there for hours. I've been really afraid to. It my number one fear right now, them getting out or stolen or somehow attacked by another animal, but I left the dog door open and just let them be for the day and took the puppy to my parents house. We're also letting the cat come and go as she wants now, because she has been so determined to leave the house. She's constantly bolting out the door and would even rather be in the garage most days. So we're letting her be and hopefully nothing happens to her. I took the bell off her collar so she can be extra stealthy. She did go into my neighbors yard and their 5 dogs chased her away and after that she's just been hanging out on our property laying in the dirt, soaking up the sun. Theres a little dog door built into the garage door that I'm now keeping open for her.

But yeah.. like I said my parents said that Toby is an angel and they'll watch him any time and I came home to the yard still intact and my dogs perfectly fine after being alone for six hours.

I enjoyed my much needed mini break from them and I'm going to go out tomorrow as well now that I feel confident that they'll be okay if I leave them sometimes.

I guess I'll end this massive post about my animals now.

✌💖

[demigodsanswer]

Headcanon of Clarisse and Silena figuring they're pregnant at the same time?

“Charlie and I are thinking about having another baby,” Silena said. 

Clarisse looked away from Hunter, her two-year-old who was busy playing a game called “hit his sister’s dolls and action figures with toy cars.” It wasn’t the best solution to the trolly problem that Clarisse had ever seen, but she was just happy that her son was philosophically engaged at his age. 

“That’s exciting. When do you think you’ll start trying?” 

“Soon, probably, we don’t want too big of an age gab between Danny and the baby,” her first and only kid so far was going to be five that April. 

“Makes sense. But you might want to wait a few months. If you got pregnant now you’d be in your last few months all summer.” Clarisse pointed out. 

Silena nodded, “The kid would also probably be a Virgo, which I just don’t think I could handle,” 

Clarisse shook her head and rolled her eyes. 

“Don’t get me wrong,” Silena continued, “I would love them, but I would be worried about them.” 

“You wouldn’t be worried about them if you accepted that the zodiac isn’t real,” Clarisse said. 

Silena wanted to push back and point out that  Clarisse’s daughter was already showing clear Gemini traits, but she figured that argument would mean nothing to her. 

“Anyway,” Silena said, “have you guys thought about having another kid?” 

Clarisse shrugged, “We’ve talked about it. We might want a third, but we’d probably want to wait a little longer. At least until he’s fully potty trained,” Clarisse said, gesturing towards Hunter. “Why?” 

“I was just thinking that it’d be really fun if we were pregnant at the same time,” Clarisse laughed. “I’m serious,” Silena protested, “and we both get pregnant so easily,” Silena unconsciously gestured towards Hunter, who she knew had not been planned (”Hey,” Clarisse interrupted, swatting her hand down), “that if we both started trying at the same time, we would probably be pregnant at the same time,” 

Clarisse rolled her eyes, “There are a lot of dumb reasons to have babies, but a pregnancy pact with your best friend has gotta be up there,” 

“Alright, fine,” SIlena said, leaning back on the couch, “no pregnancy pact.” She decided to change the subject to Hunter’s apparent love for quietly smashing toys together 

“What do you think about having a third baby?” Clarisse asked, getting out of the bed to put pajamas on. 

Chris sat up, “I think that if you want one, using a condom just now was a huge waste of time,” 

“Shut up,” Clarisse said, although it was muffled by the tee shirt she pulled over her head. “I’m serious,” she said, getting back into bed. “Do you still want a third?” 

Her put his arm around her and pulled the covers up. “Yeah, I do. What about you? Still on the fence?” 

“I don’t know. Silena and Beckendorf are going to start trying again, so it just got me thinking, I guess,” She wasn’t sure if she wanted to be pregnant again. She loved her children and wouldn’t mind a third, but Katherine’s pregnancy left her sick all the time, and Hunter was a big baby who liked to kick her awake in the middle of the night. 

“Well, we don’t have to decide anything right now,” 

Clarisse nodded, “Yeah ...” she trailed off. “I’m sure once Hunter is a little older I’m going to miss not having a baby around,” 

“Oh, I already miss not having a baby around,” 

She nudged his leg with her knee, just hard enough for him to register its malicious intent. “Easy for you to say, you don’t have to grow them,” 

He laughed, “They’re a person, not a plant,” 

“Whatever. Still, it’s not fair that you only have to contribute for ten seconds doing the one thing you think about all the time, and I have the throw up for nine months,” 

“You should have married a seahorse,” Chris said. 

She rolled over to try and fall asleep, turning off the lamp on their bedside table, ignoring his seahorse comment. 

When Danny went to bed, Silena and Charlie stayed up for an hour talking about their next baby, looking at old photos of Danny, and thinking about their future with two kids instead of just one. 

By midnight, Silena had thrown all of her concerns about being pregnant in the summer or having a virgo baby out the window. Charlie rolled over and pulled her in close as she caught her breath and tried to fix her hair (with little success). 

After a few moments of closeness and deep breath, Silena ran her hand up his arm and whispered, “Wanna try a third time? For good luck?” All good things came in threes in Ancient Greece. 

Six weeks later, the four of them were having a quiet, kid-free celebration in honor of Silena and Beckendorf’s new baby. The sonogram had confirmed it that day, and the two couldn’t look happier. 

“There’s still time,” Silena said to Clarisse, “if you want to be pregnant at the same time as me.” 

Clarisse just sipped her wine, “No, I think I’ll enjoy my summer and my non-Virgo children,” 

On December 23rd, two weeks after SIlena and Charlie announced their pregnancy, Clarisse woke up nauseous. She didn’t feel sick otherwise, there was no fever or anything. She couldn’t remember eating anything weird. Her high school was already on Christmas break, so she wasn’t overtired. Maybe she was -- 

Her train of thought was interrupted by her own gut. She moved quickly out of bed, waking up Chris in the process, before running into their en suite bathroom to throw up last night’s dinner. 

“Shit,” she heard Chris say as he got out of bed to hold her hair. 

She threw up a few more times, before sitting back and taking a deep breath; her throat and stomach were sore. Chris stuck their thermometer in her ear, but it beeped back with 98.6. 

“Shit,” Chris said. They exchanged knowing looks. “Do you think you’re ...?” 

Clarisse nodded, “And if I’m throwing up like this, it’s probably a girl,” 

Chris put an arm around her, “We don’t have to have it. If you’re not ready to be pregnant again, we don’t have too --” 

“Chris,” she cut him off, “let’s take a test first and make sure it’s not just food poisoning. But if I am pregnant again ... we make some pretty good kids,” 

“Yeah we do,” he kissed the top of her head, “plus, this way, Silena gets her wish,” 

“Oh she’s going to be so happy,” 

Four pregnancy tests later, they could be sure that Clarisse was pregnant. 

Clarisse knocked on SIlena’s door. When she answered, Clarisse pushed past her into the apartment, not showing her the pregnancy test first. “You know, either the fates have a sense of humor or there’s some love magic at work here. Looks like your dream came true” 

Silena smiled, “Are we finally running away together?” She asked. 

Clarisse laughed, “Nope, your other dream,” She took the pregnancy test out of her back pocket. 

Silena’s eyes went wide. “Clarisse la Rue, if this is a joke, I swear to god --” 

“Nope, not a joke. There are three more in my bathroom right now. All positive,” 

Silena threw her arms around Clarisse to hug her tight. “This is so exciting! Oh! And guess what!” 

“What?” 

“I threw up this morning!” Silena said it like it was the most miraculous experience she’d ever had. 

“So?” 

“Do you think that means it’s a girl? I mean, you were sick all the time with Katherine,” 

“Maybe, but don’t take that as hard science,” 

“Do you think yours is a boy or a girl?” Silena asked. 

“Girl. I also threw up this morning,” 

“What if they’re both girls, and they grow up to become best friends, and then they fall in love? How cute would that be,” 

“Adorable,” Clarisse admitted, “But I’m still not sure you didn’t use love magic to get me pregnant,” 

Silena shook her head, “Nope, no love magic here, just yours and Chris’s sheer bad luck,” 

~*~*~*~

((I didn’t know how to end this so i just decided to stop typing))

[all-things-all-the-time]

It's Christmas!! And Ryan can't think of anything to get Michael what's he gonna do???

12 Days Until Christmas

‘what do u get for someone who has everything?’

That’s what Ryan typed into Google on December 13, 2016. Mike really does have everything - the newest tech, every article of clothing, homewares, things for his dog, and Ryan, which is probably the best thing to have in the world if Ryan says so himself.

Of course, everything that comes up is something stupid or something Mike wouldn’t like - like a cooking class or driving a race-car around a track a couple of times.

Ryan huffs and shuts his computer, rolling off the bed to go find Mike. Maybe he’ll be able to think better after some sex.

11 Days Until Christmas.

“So uhm…what do you want for Christmas?” Ryan asks carefully over dinner. He’s afraid Michael is going to freak out because Christmas is like 2 seconds away and Ryan doesn’t have anything.

Mike shrugs as he sticks a piece of broccoli into his mouth. “Dunno,” he says around his food. “Anything. Something cool.”

Ryan pouts, and he thinks he hides it, but then Michael is laughing at him. “Really dude, don’t sweat it. We’ve been together for so long. There are only so many presents we can come up with.”

Ryan glances up at Mike, and he’s smiling that stupidly perfect smile and it makes Ryan feel so much better about the whole thing. “Yeah, okay.”

10 Days Until Christmas

“I got you the best ever gift,” Mike says after a particularly dirty round of sex. 

Ryan is flopped on the bed, still breathing hard and sweating. He looks over at Mike, glowering. “Fuck you, dude. What happened to the whole 'don’t worry about finding something awesome?’”

Mike shrugs and looks over at Ryan. The bastard isn’t even breaking a sweat. Then again, Ryan did all the work this time. “Yeah, but I found something so awesome so obviously I had to get it.”

And that just brings all the anxiety right back.

9 Days Until Christmas

“Mom?" 

"Hi, baby, Merry Almost Christmas!”

“I don’t know what to get for Mike.”

“Oh honey, I’m sure you’re gift enough.”

“Yeah, but he said he has a really good gift for me!”

“Maybe a nice watch.”

“He already has a thousand watches, Mom.”

“I don’t know, sweetheart, but I have to run. Devon just went out on his skateboard and I don’t think he brought a helmet. Love you.”

8 Days Until Christmas

It’s 3am and Ryan is almost asleep. Until Mike slips his cold fingers under Ryan’s shirt to rest on his stomach. Ryan groans and shifts, wanting to push Michael away, but not having the willpower. 

“Ry,” Mike whispers, now pressing his cold-ass nose to Ryan’s cheek.

“What?” Ryan asks with another groan.

“Can we come out on New Years? Like…publicly?”

This is not the conversation Ryan wants to be having at 3am. “Babe,” he says slowly, with a sigh.

Mike sighs too, and it’s far more disappointed than Ryan’s. “Yeah, I get it. It’s cool, Ry. No problem…Night.”

“Night.”

7 Days Until Christmas

Ryan feels guilty about the conversation he and Mike had the night previous. He’s hesitant to come out. Mike feels like he’s done with swimming and he can live his real life now. But Ryan is still planning on swimming in Tokyo, and he doesn’t know if the world is ready for them to come out as a couple.

Mike has asked him to come out a few times, and each time, Ryan has had to let him down. He doesn’t like doing it, but he just isn’t ready yet.

Michael is in the pool because, yeah, he says he’s done, but Ryan doesn’t believe it for a second. Ryan’s inside, morning practice over, chugging a Gatorade and looking down at Mike’s ring on their dresser. He's wearing a matching one, on his right ring finger.

Fuck. He can’t even get Mike a ring for Christmas because of course he already has one.

6 Days Until Christmas

ryan lochte, 2:27pm: hey babe

cheryl burke, 2:27pm: hey hey :-* merry holidays!!

ryan lochte, 2:27pm: u 2!

ryan lochte, 2:28pm: wat shud i get for mike?

cheryl burke, 2:28pm: shit ry

cheryl burke, 2:28pm: that’s a hard one.

cheryl burke, 2:28pm: he has everything

ryan lochte, 2:29pm: tell me about it!!!!

cheryl burke, 2:32pm: how about one of those fancy coffee makers?

cheryl burke, 2:32pm: or maybe a trip somewhere

cheryl burke, 2:32pm: idk baby. i’ll keep my thinking cap on for you

5 Days Until Christmas

“Five days 'til Christmas,” Allison comments, playing with a loose thread on one of the blankets. “What did you get for Mike?”

“I don’t know what to get him!” Ryan says, panicked.

“Five golden rings?” Allison teases, and Ryan hates the way her lips curl up in a shit-eating grin.

“Asshole,” he mutters, flopping down on the bed. “I’m actually panicking here. I have five days and no fucking gift besides a mug that says ’#2 Swimmer.’”

Allison is quiet for a few minutes, and so is Ryan, as they sit together on the bed. Basically everything he thinks of, Mike either already has or wouldn’t want. He assumes Allison is having the same problem.

“What about some kitchen stuff? He’s getting into cooking.”

Ryan sighs and nods. “Yeah, I thought of that. We could use some new pots and stuff…thanks, Schmitty.”

4 Days Until Christmas

“Dude, I got Mike the best present.”

Ryan’s jaw drops and he feels like the air has just been knocked out of him. “You got Mike a gift?” he asks, shocked his little brother even remembered it was Christmastime.

“Fuck yeah, and Mom helped me pick it out!”

Ryan’s anger bubbles over at that point. “She helped you?! Dude, I asked her for help and she rushed off to deal with your stupid ass!”

Devon laughs and Ryan wants to throw his phone across the room.

“What did you get him?”

“I got him an Amazon Alexa. The one thing your house doesn’t have.” Devon pauses, and Ryan can basically hear his smile over the phone. “With all that smart house equipment so you can just yell at a robot to turn your lights on.”

“Well thanks for outfitting my whole home,” Ryan grumbles before ending the call.

3 Days Until Christmas

Mike’s presents for Ryan are meticulously wrapped and under the tree in a neat pile. Ryan sighs when he looks at it, hoping there’s nothing too extravagant. Mike always goes overboard on gifts. It’s not like money is an issue, but Ryan is so shit at coming up with gifts. 

Mike has always assured Ryan it’s just because he likes showering the people he loves with things they're gonna love, and Ryan wishes he had the same talent. 

2 Days Until Christmas

Ryan manages to come up with a few good gifts for Mike. Of course, he still needs one big one, because he knows Michael has something big for him.

Still stumped, Ryan wraps up the rest of Mike’s gifts and puts them under the tree. Their piles, luckily, are pretty much even, so Ryan, so far, feels confident in his choices.

Too bad he only has a few hours to come up with the big gift of 2016.

Christmas Eve

“One present?” Mike pleads, plugging in the tree lights and sitting down by the pile of presents. 

“Fine,” Ryan concedes, sitting down with Mike. “One present.”

It’s an old Phelps tradition to open one gift on Christmas Eve, and every year, Ryan says no. And every year, Mike begs until Ryan says yes.

Michael surveys the presents with his name on them and he picks one from the pile. Ryan grins, because he knows exactly what it is.

Mike tears open the paper to reveal a cardboard box, which he opens, and he immediately breaks out into a huge grin.

“You don’t expect me to actually wear this?” Mike asks, holding up the chef’s coat, complete with his name embroidered on the chest.

“Yes I fucking do,” Ryan insists, leaning over for a quick kiss.

Ryan picks out a gift from his pile, a small and light one, and unceremoniously rips off the bow and paper. Inside an envelope are tickets to Italy for a week in April, and Ryan feels dizzy with excitement. They’ve been talking about a trip abroad, minus Olympics, for a while now, and Ryan immediately lurches forward to hug Mike.

“Thanks, Mikey.”

“Merry Christmas Eve, Ry.”

Christmas Day

Michael is up at 8am and he shoves at Ryan’s side. “Get up,” he says, sounding like a five year old. “Presents time.”

It takes a few minutes to get Ryan out of bed, but as soon as he has coffee in his hand, he’s fully awake and down by the tree. Soon, the room is a flurry of torn paper, bows, and new gifts, and there’s a bit of a pause. Ryan knows what comes next. The big gifts.

Luckily, without prompting, Michael goes first. He hands Ryan a box and inside he finds a laurel from their first Olympics, but it’s been dipped in gold and silver. 

“Remember this?” Mike purrs as Ryan runs his fingers over the gold leaves. “You refused to take it off and it got all stuck in your hair the first time we had sex.”

Ryan blushes, but he also feels tears prick at his eyes. He blinks quickly, looking up at Michael when he feels confident that he won’t actually cry. “Thank you,” he whispers, leaning in to kiss Michael. 

When he pulls back, Ryan knows it’s his turn. He takes out his phone, and Michael looks confused for a second when Ryan hands it to him. Michael unlocks it and it opens to the most recent post on Ryan’s Instagram page, which Michael hasn’t seen yet as Ryan posted it just before they started unwrapping gifts. 

It’s a selfie of them kissing right before they left Athens, paired with a selfie of them kissing just the other day. The caption reads, “the best gift I’ve ever gotten” and it already has thousands of likes. 

Ryan is nervous because Michael is quiet for so long, but he looks up at Ryan with tears streaking his cheeks and a huge smile on his face. 

Yeah, Ryan nailed Christmas this year.