#and i hope you feel ashamed of yourself but obviously you're not capable of that

[cbk1000]

The review I just posted on Goodreads (under a cut because it’s long and contains excerpts depicting child rape):

This review is a warning for any readers who are looking for a cute, lightweight historical romance with a happy ending; you won't find it here. You will, however, find pedophilia and a 'hero' who turns out to be a child rapist. While I wish that were a hyperbolic statement it is not; nor is it open to interpretation: the main character himself confesses to feeling a sexual attraction to the main heroine while she was still a child and he an adult. He also confesses to sexually assaulting her in her sleep. I'm going to quote these scenes exactly as they are, so if you do not have the stomach to read an in-depth description of the assault, this is your warning to turn back now. This is the most vile book I have ever read. The writing is terrible; you wouldn't use it for toilet paper after a bad bout of food poisoning; even your poorly-digested Mexican food deserves better than that. But it's a hilariously over-the-top sort of terrible until the very end, when anatomical oopsies and characters with all the maturity and cleverness of a 6-year-old (and not a precocious one) are exchanged for the author's disgusting romanticization of child rape. I try not to judge a fiction writer based on their material; the manifestations of our imaginations are not generally indicative of our morality. But to write, in all seriousness, a scene in which your main character assaults a sleeping child, and worse, to use this scene as a way to assuage the heroine's fears that the 'hero' doesn't really love her, to persuade her that, in fact, the 'hero' loved her all along, that he never even looked at another woman once she came into his life (at the age of 12), is, to vastly understate my feelings on the subject, profoundly disturbing. The author's bio states that 'Her stories feature heroes who fall so much in love that they go a little batty, acting the way women often wish their lovers would behave.' RAPING A CHILD IS NOT 'A LITTLE BIT BATTY'. DROWN YOURSELF. To provide some context for the following excerpts: Vlad and Mala are married under English law. Shortly afterward, Mala is kidnapped by an unknown horseman who later turns out to be her brother. Vlad sets out for their nearby encampment to confront her family, only to find that Mala has gone willingly because she has persuaded herself that Vlad never really loved her; otherwise, he'd have had them married according to Romani traditions. Even though he has literally married her and pronounced an excruciating number of times (in language laden with the plunder of a thousand violated thesauri), how eternally devoted he is to her incomparable ladybits, she decides he doesn't really love her because these people are all flaming stupid and the author needed to throw in a bit of cheap drama at the last moment. It turns out Vlad has a big secret (that we the readers are not made aware of until the very last second because not being a complete dumpster fire of a human who thinks it's wonderfully romantic to have the hero RAPE CHILDREN isn't enough: the author wouldn't know how to competently tell a story if it crawled, fully-plotted, out of her ass and fucking bit her), and Mala tells him she will not return with him unless he confesses this secret to her and explains why he ran away from her family years ago, so she can judge whether or not he will just throw her over again and vanish. So here we go. This is his confession, word for word: 'I swear to you that I’m no deviant. I’ve never had a sexual interest in children. Never. Well, never until you were twelve and I came to meet your Papa and attend his wedding to my mother. Mother introduced us and my heart stopped. I froze and don’t even recall if I spoke. Then you ran up to give me a hug in welcome and my most private part unfroze with a vengeance.” He paused for breath and to give her a chance to kick him and run away–but when she did neither, he continued. “I was horrified at myself, but helpless against the force of my response. Through the ceremony I positioned myself behind a small shrub of a convenient height and vowed not to so much as look at you. Course, I couldn’t look at anyone or anything else. When the women began dancing around the couple after the vows, I watched your budding breasts jiggle when you kicked and imagined myself…,” A noise in the background halted his words, and he jumped ahead. “That night, around the fire, Tobar gave an amazing, emotional speech, where he said that in marrying my mother, he acquired another son. My blood father hated me for existing as I was a living reminder of his unpardonable lapse of judgment in wedding a damned gypsy. Your father accepted me, Russian blood and all. I couldn’t repay his affection by lusting after my step-sister. I left that night and vowed to stay away until whatever demon that had possessed me was evicted.' He then apparently went on to drown himself in a bunch of orgies, but decides not to tell her that part because she doesn't need to hear it. He continues: '"I thought it possible that I’d exaggerated the event in my mind. I returned about two and a half months after we first met, vowing to treat you as a younger sister. I kept my vow until I spotted you as I rode in, strolling in an area secluded from the caravan by a stand of trees. You were flirting with a lad a couple of years older. He brushed your hair back and tilted up your chin for a kiss he never got. I leapt off my galloping stallion, stormed over and told the brash bastard that if he so much as looked at you again, I’d geld him. I was jealous as hell.” “You were?” Mala asked. “I thought you were acting like an enraged big brother.” “No,” Vlad said. “Hell, no. Despite my every vow and intention, my love, I have never, for a single second, felt like your brother. My obsession with you grew worse, and more obvious. Your father says he saw it and so did Nic, but neither of them had a clue how low I’d sink, how evil I’d become. I kept myself mostly under control that visit, save for a few brush ups with some of the other fellows who had dreams and intentions that I destroyed rather ruthlessly. It was my next visit when my demon overthrew my will. That’s when the true evil started.” “That’s nonsense,” Mala said. “No, it’s not,” Vlad said. “All I can say in my defense is that the first time was accidental. I was away from the tribe, fishing and trying to clear my head and cool my loins. I succeeded only in aggravating the fish. After I packed up my gear, I strolled in the woods for a bit. A splash and a giggle drew my attention, and I stalked to a stand of trees and dense brush and peered through. ‘Twas you, dressed only in sunlight and your golden skin. You were bathing. Your youth, my supposed honor and morality, all of it commanded me to leave and give you privacy. I didn’t. After that, every night, at every campsite, I did it again and again.” Mala blinked. “You watched me bathe? And the other girls as well?” “There were other girls?” Vlad asked. “There are no other girls, Mala. There are no other women.” He steeled himself and continued. “And yes, I watched you, but I did more. I pleasured myself as I watched. I invaded your privacy and desecrated it. I reviled myself for it then and every moment since then. I ordered myself to stop but I didn’t. I couldn’t. I’d leave so I’d have to stop, but I could not stay away. Then came my worst transgression. One winter’s night, your father and brother left with the other men to scout and liberate some horses. They asked me to sleep inside the vardo with you. I tried to do the right thing and made myself a separate pallet, but you complained of the cold. It took pitifully little for me to join you in your cozy nest. You cuddled up to my back innocently, for warmth.” Vlad paused and closed his eyes, but she made a noise of protest so he looked at her again. “My flesh felt every sweet inch of you, and I ate it up like a starving man at a banquet. Eventually, I drifted off to sleep. When I awoke, our positions had reversed. You’d turned over and I spooned you. My arm lay around your waist, but I moved it up until your breasts rested upon it. I jiggled them, slightly, imitating the way I watched them move whenever you danced. You didn’t wake, and I recalled your father and brother’s jokes about how deeply you slept. So I cupped your breasts through your gown, teasing your nipples to pert fullness that I couldn’t see.” “Oh my Great Duck,” Mala said. “I thought I dreamed that. You turned me over, and climbed atop me, didn’t you?” “To my everlasting damnation, I did,” Vlad said. “I hiked up your gown and positioned myself against your feminine mound. I moved your gown off your shoulders to uncover your breasts. I sucked you and humped you like an animal until I found the most shameful, the most splendid release of my life. I was beyond disgusted with myself, so I got up, cleaned up, and went outside to build a fire or kindle it or something.”' He goes on to say that he afterwards fled and “signed on to crew a ship leaving for America. I needed an ocean’s distance to keep me away else i’d return and likely do something even worse.” Keep in mind, this confession is made in front of her father and brother. So they stabbed him a bunch of times, right? Or at least kicked him in the nuts. No. Oh, well, what can you do; some families are extraordinarily shitty. SHE at least stabbed him a bunch of times and then sailed off alone into the sunset with her rapist bleeding to his slow and miserable death, right? That was the happy ending the author promised? No. 'Mala watched shame and love battle in Vlad’s eyes and recognized it as the expression she’d seen there for years. She hadn’t understood it then, but she understood it and him now. ‘Twas with effort that she managed not to dance as she said, “Ask me again.”' SHE'S SO HAPPY SHE CAN BARELY HOLD STILL. He then asks her to marry him once more, her dad and brother are like, “Yay! Let’s get this gypsy wedding on the road”, they have a Romani ceremony, and then the book ends with this scene: 'Vlad drew her close for a kiss, but paused to ask, “Do you finally understand that I’ve loved you since the moment we met, that I’ve never willingly spent a second apart from you, and that I will hold you in my arms, my heart and my life until eternity ends?” Mala was crying too hard to answer, so she nodded as he took her lips with tender intent, feeding her back happy tears, flavored with a taste of forever.' In conclusion: I wish I could Chinese water torture this book. I hope hell is a place where books like this go to burn for all eternity.

[punkscowardschampions]

Ava & Nancy

Ava: Has he told you? Nancy: Yeah Ava: How are you holding up? Nancy: better than he is Ava: Not saying much but Ava: that's something Nancy: how are you holding up then? Ava: It's been, a rollercoaster implies that it's in any way on the rails so not that, something as up and down and side to side Ava: tornado, perhaps Ava: but it's far from about me so I'm just here, you know Nancy: I know what you mean Ava: It's more to do with you than me Ava: so, what did he say exactly? Nancy: You know what he's like, just coming out with it Nancy: there's nothing for me to argue with Nancy: maybe if I had a clue then but now Ava: Yeah Ava: but none of us did Ava: I think mum was probably right, even if that's fucked Ava: taking it to the police wouldn't have done anything Nancy: She'd had talked her way out of it, his word against hers and he doesn't come across well when he's upset Ava: Exactly Ava: it's one of those legal grey areas Ava: morally black but you know Ava: can't get charged for that Nancy: I feel like shit, if I hadn't left it wouldn't have been her and none of this would be happening Ava: I know, but you have to try not to think like that Ava: she picked him, really Ava: he was angry and upset, with you, yeah, but Rio too and you know, everyone and everything Ava: but I don't think he would have pursued her, if he were in any state Ava: and she had her problems with you, but I don't think that's solely why she did it either Nancy: I know but he could've used any girl in Chelsea to get back at Rio, it was her because of me, that's all my thoughts keep coming back to Nancy: and no other girl would've used him like that for any reason Ava: We all let each other down Ava: sometimes you have to do what you have to do Ava: and then sometimes bad shit happens because of that Ava: Chloe wouldn't have felt the need to drop this if I weren't with James Ava: we could all just keep on not knowing Nancy: It's not your fault, Av, she hated you cos she hated me first Nancy: it's not like she's heartbroken over James Ava: Still, it wouldn't have happened, you were never going to be dating him Ava: but none of us can live beholden to her and the things she has over us, we shouldn't Ava: at least now, we aren't, she's played all her cards Nancy: Did Buster tell you she's already engaged? Ava: I heard Ava: I looked on Gen's profile and he's like her dad's age Ava: and really stereotypically Italian Nancy: Gross Nancy: I swear to god, she's not a real person Nancy: who does any of this? Ava: I think she does her hardest not to be Ava: fuck everyone else Ava: her parents are just Ava: at a total loss Ava: we say ours are ashamed of us but this is so real Ava: they've had more to do with James than her for years now Nancy: At least he's got their support Ava: I think they're just as scared that they'll lose contact as he is Nancy: Yeah, of course Ava: Did he say if he'd told Ri yet? Nancy: I asked, when I was at my angriest, before I really understood what the circumstances were Nancy: He wouldn't talk about her which either means he has and it didn't go well, or he's still working up to it Ava: She's going to know something is wrong, he can't hide anything from her Ava: and the test takes as long as it takes, I know he was waiting for that but I don't know how Nancy: Right now, I'm selfishly glad that she knows we barely talk so she won't ask me Ava: That's going to be Ava: not fun Ava: never mind how pregnant she is Nancy: Oh god, don't Nancy: I was going to come back for a while but maybe that'll make it worse Nancy: Like he'll think I'm just there to oversee his downfall or something Ava: You don't think that will happen, do you? Nancy: I don't think she'll leave him Nancy: But the old wounds this is gonna open up, even though nobody's disputing he didn't actually consent, when they're still dealing with everything that happened with Venus Nancy: add her hormones in and his way of reacting to literally anything Ava: Fucking hell Ava: you should come back, if you want to though Ava: regardless Nancy: Ri might need me Nancy: not that she'll admit it, obviously Ava: 'course Ava: I don't think it would hurt Nancy: I'm a crap babysitter but I'm a great person to vent at about him so Nancy: if I slag him off enough she'll start leaping to his defence automatically Ava: An evil-good plan Nancy: something good needs to come out of all the evil Ava: We can but try Nancy: Yeah Nancy: I know I need to Ava: Does feel better than doing nothing Ava: only a bit but Ava: still Nancy: I wish there was more I could really do, but it all just feels too late Nancy: inventing a time machine feels very above my capabilities, if I'm honest Nancy: Feel free to tell James I'm here if he ever wants someone to talk to about his monster of an ex Ava: I will Ava: you might have to open a hotline, by the sounds of it Nancy: That'd be a decent earner while I'm back Ava: Time is money, like Nancy: exactly Ava: Wonder what the wedding will be like Nancy: what I remember hearing about hers and James' sounded awful Nancy: but of course this one will have to be more stereotypically Italian Ava: fucked herself on flower girls too Nancy: unless he's got a big family she can insert herself into Ava: Heaven help him Ava: or she's already knocked up, the only way she does it is with a gun to her head and the groom's Nancy: has anyone checked he can speak enough English to know what's going on, like? Ava: I don't know if we've got the welfare team on that Ava: he looks pretty pleased with himself Ava: the pictures would really confirm your homosexuality for you tbh Nancy: Well that's disgusting Ava: If he was the teenaged pool boy, be all over that, obviously Ava: can only hope she's met her match this time Nancy: Even if she hasn't, like you said, there's no more she can do to any of us Nancy: And she'd never get the kids back if she wanted to try that as a last resort Ava: Not putting anything past her obviously Ava: but yeah, I can't see her trying and failing at that any time soon Ava: it's a small mercy Ava: she was no mother Nancy: Imagine having her as yours, oh my god Nancy: it makes me wanna hug mum Ava: Let's not get too crazy Nancy: the urge will have passed by mid-flight, don't worry Ava: Unless you have too many complementaries, of course Nancy: well yeah Ava: No one would blame you on that score Nancy: it doesn't help though Ava: The drink or the lack of blame? Nancy: Both Ava: Yeah Ava: not much in the party mood myself Ava: pity or otherwise Ava: though being forced to 'focus on my schoolwork' like that's remotely important right now is getting me close Nancy: Is there a brochure for the planet mum and dad live on cos I'm really intrigued by it? Ava: They really think they can keep me out of it Ava: Like I'm not the one who did the DNA test, like I'm not the one who got James and Buster to talk Ava: sure, I'll forget about that and write my politics essay, hold on 🙄 Nancy: I'll do your essay as long as you leave enough time for a thorough spell check Ava: You really wanna keep busy, yeah Nancy: Yeah Ava: You are allowed to be angry with him Ava: you know Ava: because he was a victim too doesn't mean you're not allowed to feel that Ava: even if it means you don't direct it at him, you don't have to try and repress it Nancy: I am angry at him, but I'm also so tired of being Ava: Damn genetics Nancy: He can't forgive me for going and I can't keep defending why I had to Nancy: cos he'll never accept that it's not entirely my fault, that I needed him to help me and he wouldn't Ava: He does though Ava: he's told me Ava: like you said, it's too late Nancy: He'll never tell me, so we'll only ever talk when he has good or bad news to give me Ava: Yeah Ava: it's because it doesn't change it Ava: like you said, no time machine Ava: getting him to admit that he wasn't there doesn't change that he wasn't, even if you want to hear it Ava: just like you explaining why you had to leave doesn't mean you stayed Ava: it's all just words, you know Nancy: Then how can we ever? Ava: Maybe you can't Ava: because that isn't a truce Ava: if neither of you is willing to leave your post there is no middle ground Ava: you actually have to be ready and willing to drop defending yourself and blaming each other Ava: and neither of you is, so Ava: that's that Ava: you can't make yourself give it up, clearly Nancy: It's so unfair Nancy: that everything turned out like this Ava: It just is Ava: you have to get to a place where you can just say that's what happened Ava: not attribute why's and who's to it, see it entirely objectively Nancy: maybe if I fly to Tuscany first and murder her Ava: Maybe Ava: you'll still hate yourself though Nancy: Thanks for the reminder Ava: Like you forgot Nancy: my phone alarm is set for hourly bursts of self-loathing, of course Ava: That'll be why you're tired Ava: can't even put that on him, eh Ava: unlucky, like Nancy: I'll have the luck of the Irish and all that good craic to fall back on soon enough, like Ava: 'Course Ava: be a blast Nancy: It always is Ava: It's been a while Ava: things might have changed Nancy: This family would have to catch some kind of break first Ava: Naturally, when I finish this essay, it'll all be worth it Nancy: Just make sure it's worth sticking on the fridge Ava: 'Cos that wouldn't fuck with the aesthetics Nancy: It's no finger-painting, sure Nancy: But if anyone needs the reminder that you're not a toddler it's mum and dad Ava: Really surprising they're not more elated to gain a ready-made grandkid Nancy: If the mother was anyone else, they'd be jumping for joy, no doubt Ava: Unless that mother was me Ava: of course Nancy: James has probably been well and truly scared off Ava: I reckon she's a pretty strong contraceptive Nancy: I'm in no danger but if you put me in a room with her I'd take the pill Ava: 💀 cyanide Nancy: or whichever colour gets you out of the Matrix Nancy: bye babe Ava: Careful Ava: that's what 'woke' lady and minority haters call themselves Ava: don't wanna get in that camp Nancy: is it? Ava: yeah, they're 'red pilled' 'cos they know 'the truth' Ava: the truth that feminism is a lie and all women are evil bitches, like Nancy: Oh great Ava: You accidentally been making loads of enemies over there? Ava: Whoopsie Nancy: I'll say that's the reason now Ava: Go the whole hog and call yourself an incel Ava: when any of the fam asks you how your love life is going Nancy: 😂 Nancy: Don't make me laugh though, my head is killing me Ava: I feel you Ava: the only pills I've been popping are paracetamols Nancy: Nurofen express 💚 Nancy: my actual true love Ava: so rock and roll Ava: shame even by American standards, that's no bitch's name Nancy: Read it in your best impression of the accent if you wanna swoon though, obviously Ava: It clearly does it for you, like Nancy: It's a very diverse place, thank god Ava: Sure babe Ava: the fashion industry is known for it 😏 Nancy: 🙄 Ava: Thanks for not trying to deny it Nancy: I'm not their spokesperson, pros or cons Ava: Not part of the job description of photographer or girlfriend then? Nancy: No Ava: Phew Nancy: Find a way to include it in your Politics essay Ava: Alright, mother Nancy: Never call me that again, please Nancy: if I didn't have a headache before Ava: Yeah, we didn't reckon you'd be next Nancy: Weird that you've discussed it, but okay Ava: The heat needs to be taken off somewhere, like Ava: What about Billie and her fella, do you reckon they'll go for 👶👶? Nancy: No Nancy: they barely see each other at the moment Ava: I won't put my money there then Nancy: You'd be better off keeping it on Buster Ava: I think he's disqualified by default Ava: obviously Ava: don't need no 🔮 Nancy: This one better not be born early cos of the drama Ava: She's getting out of the danger danger zone at least but still Ava: having babies is like what they were born to do Ava: missed those genetics, clearly Nancy: Lord Ava: 😂 You're so squeamish Nancy: I don't like babies, excuse me Ava: I didn't mention anything about the miracle of childbirth even Nancy: thankfully Nancy: cos it's not a miracle, it's a 🤞 & pray for the best kind of situation Nancy: you might tear open or get cut open and you get off lightly if you only 💩 or 🤢 everywhere Ava: 🙄🙄 the dramatics Ava: I've had worse nights out Ava: and I didn't get a cute kid at the end of it so 🤷 Nancy: it's not me that you need to convince so Ava: I don't think I know anyone else so definitely anti-child Nancy: I've got nothing against children, I just don't want any Ava: uhuh Nancy: It's only considered weird cos this family is so obsessed with having as many as possible Ava: Nah, it's not that Nancy: Like I said, reserve the soapbox for someone who wants to hear the pros and cons Ava: Okay Nancy: Okay, I've got loads to finish up before I can leave Ava: 'course you do Ava: I'll let you go then Nancy: I'll talk to you soon Nancy: without time zones to factor in Ava: Cool Ava: no worries Nancy: Let me know if you wanna meet up, who knows where mum and dad will decide to base themselves and when Ava: Regardless, I don't have time to come over there so I won't Nancy: Yeah, exactly Ava: Focus on what you need to do Ava: I was just checking you were okay Nancy: And I wanna check in on you too, so let me know, okay? Nancy: It's the shortest flight ever Ava: Seriously, there's no need Nancy: Alright Ava: Just focus on helping Ri, if that's what you're going to do Nancy: I'll do my best Ava: 👍 Nancy: Later then Ava: Bye Nancy: 🧡 Ava: Is Billie coming over too? Nancy: I don't know Nancy: I'll ask her when she gets home Ava: She should Nancy: I'll do my best with that too Ava: Alright Ava: that's all then Nancy: Okay, bye

[merinmunson]

I am my own hero

Pairings: Loki Laufeyson x Reader

Summary: You're Tony's sister and you worked for S.H.I.E.L.D. before you found out it had been taken over by HYDRA. HYDRA agents were trying to turn you into a Winter Soldier, when Loki tries to save you. But will he?

Warnings: mentions of violence, blood and angst.

S.H.I.E.L.D had collapsed and the Captain, Natasha, Sam and you were responsible. Bucky, Steve's best friend was alive and had been turned into a weapon. All the people you had worked with over the years... most of them served HYDRA. You used to have blood on your hands, but now it was better depicted as hands in a pool of blood. You had killed people you thought to be close with, people you'd trusted with your life... Those memories did not leave your mind any second of any day since you would find yourself remembering all that pain, all those perfect pictures of betrayal and death. And you were to blame.

Moving on from that came with a cost, you'd always have nightmares. But eventually you were able to find peace and rest, although you still had those horrendous bad dreams from time to time. A lot of HYDRA groupies were still on the streets, either camouflaged of just plain hiding from the new S.H.I.E.L.D and especially the Avengers (a team you weren't ashamed to say you belonged to), despite what most thought, you were not afraid of facing those thugs. There was a reason you were on the Avengers, you had superpowers and boy, were they amazing. You could control energy.

What did come as a surprise to you is that HYDRA was planning on turning you into their new Winter Soldier since Bucky had already been freed.

***********

You were all alone in your apartment talking to Tony over the phone.

"Y/N, what would you say if I bought an island?"

"I thought you already owned an island"

"What made you think that?"

"You're probably the only billionaire who doesn't own an island"

Then you started to hear vague noises coming from outside your apartment, near the door. The best course of action was to alert Tony that something was going on.

"Well, brother, I gotta say, it's a shame Cap's lost his shield"

He understood the reference immediately.

"It is, but I'm on it right now"

And with that, you knew whatever happened you'd be safe. Carefully planning your next steps you hunged up the phone knowing they'd come without hesitation, whoever they were. And so it happened. A whole tactical HYDRA team broke into your apartment, a burnt Rumlow leading the way. You got on your knees with your hands on your head aware that there was no point on fighting, they were, after all, heavily armed. It took one punch to put you to sleep.

When you opened your eyes you found yourself tied up, obviously, to a chair. Your only advantage was the fact that none of them knew about your powers. Most of the time you would fight with weapons or just your body, only your team mates knew about your powers. You waited a short amount of time until one HYDRA agent showed up.

"Y/N Y/L... Who would've thought that the one to kill us, would be our salvation" he showed you a dark smile.

"What do you want? Who are you?"

Not only were you going to buy time until Tony and the others arrived but you wanted to solve this problem by yourself too.

"I suppose I can answer both of those questions, since you'll obviously forget in no time..."

Then it hit you. They wanted to turn you into a Winter Soldier.

"What, the Black Widow wasn't available for the job?" You joked, both Natasha and yourself were really good at fighting, but she already spoke many languages, that made her a perfect candidate for Winter Soldier. You would have had to be taught some stuff.

"That's one of the main things we like about you, you're smart. Too much, if you ask me. Unfortunately, we do not know where Miss Romanoff may be, unlike you. Not so hard to track you down."

"Huh, and here little old me thought changing apartments would do... guess I should have gotten myself out of the internet, shouldn't I?"

"Yes. You should have"

"But man, do you know how hard it is to live without Wi-Fi?"

He punched you straight on the jaw.

"That's definitely leaving a bruise"

He punched you again, this time near your mouth. You bit your lip and blood started dripping.

"Shut your mouth or we will sew it"

"Don't you need it open for me to talk in different languages? You seriously have to put your plan together..."

He was about to hit you again when suddenly, he stopped mid air.

"So you're stalling me, huh?"

Now you were terrified.

"Let's see if you talk so much shit after being wiped!"

He called for some agents to pick you up and take you to the machine were they'd turn you into a monster. On the way you tried to free yourself and hit the men carrying you, you screamed your lungs out hoping they would stop or drop you to cover their ears. All of that in vain. When you reached the room, one of them held you by the neck and the other untied you, both of them placed you and trapped you on the machine.

"I'm gonna kill you all!! Get me out of this!!"

All they did was look at you with an empty stare and wait for the magic to happen. Now was the time to use your powers. Looking at the source of the machine's powers you concentrated and saw clearly its energy, with a little effort you absorbed the energy into your own body and waited. You could easily take them all down now, but you wanted to see their boss.

"Won't you at least tell your boss to come here?!"

"Baron Strucker will see you after you're ready "

Now you had a name and you knew he had to be somewhere inside the building.

"Wow, I get to meet HYDRA's crème de la crème"

They took it as your last joke and pulled the lever. Right then you all heard a loud crash and witnessed how a man dressed in green with a mischievous smile, two daggers and black hair walked into the room. Two HYDRA troops appeared to fight him as you sighed, annoyed. It was Loki and he had ruined your goddamn plan!

You got out of the machine, breaking the metallic grips with your acquired superstrenght, product of the energy you absorbed, and fought HYDRA while they were too busy looking out for Loki. He had become an Avenger not so long ago to redeem himself from his past sins, you were completely okay with giving him a second chance and all that, you had to admit you were close to him. Nevertheless you didn't trust him enough to tell him about your powers.

They tried to shoot you and you simply dodged the bullets and shot them with the guns you took from your first victims. Once all of them were down and Loki was simply standing there since you acted faster than him, you turned around to actually face him. An exasperated sigh dropped from your lips.

"Why the hell did you come? I had this under control! Now their boss is probably out of reach, goddammit!"

"They were gonna turn you into their weapon, they hurt you, I can see the blood in your face and the bruises. Did you honestly expect me doing nothing to stop them?!" He asks not believing what he's hearing.

"It was all an act!" You shoot the remaining bullets against one of the lifeless bodies on the floor. "Fuck you, you son of a bitch" you tell the body.

"Your brother sent me here to save you, the least you could do was explain to me how did you do all that and say thank you."

"I'm not thanking you for saving myself"

"Come on, Y/N, you're the only one I would do this for willingly. I am kinda like your personal hero" he finished joking.

"Okay. Thank you, Loki. For standing there doing nothing." you tease him, now relaxed as you remember you still have the name.

"You do love to tease me, don't you, love?" He had never called you that, but hearing his voice whisper that to your ears sent shivers all over your skin.

"Who's teasing now, huh?"

"You still have to tell me how you did that"

You wondered if it was safe to tell him. He saw your consideration and told you to trust him, he told you he would never do anything to hurt you. You knew you had feeling for him and you also knew he had feelings for you too, the only reason you two weren't a thing was because of your trust issues.

That was when you finally decided it was time to let him into your heart.

"This is supposed to be a secret... I have powers. I control all kinds of energy"

"Does that mean that you could take all energy out of me right now and kill me?"

"If I knew how, yes. I haven't really used them much, I prefer to fight fair. And by the way, love, I am my own hero"

"How am I not surprised by that" he closes the space between you two. "I promise you, I will keep it a secret"

"Loki... do you... like... do you like me?" You ask afraid of the answer, not capable of being apart from him.

"No. I don't. I don't like you, Y/N... I love you"

You kiss him cupping his head on your hands as he grabs your body firmly, once you separate he looks at you smiling.

"We should have done that earlier"

"WHAT THE HELL, LOKI?! I TOLD YOU TO SAVE MY SISTER NOT TO MAKE OUT WITH HER!" Tony and the rest of the team appear and see the scene.

"Uh... Y/N are you okay?" Both Steve and Clint ask examining you whole. Loki steps aside to face an angry Big brother!Tony, Momma!Bruce and Momma!Nat

"If you hurt her in any way, I'll kill you" Nat threatens him.

"Just for you to know, Hulk is ready for round two"

"YOU HURT MY LITTLE SISTER OR DO ANYTHING THAT MIGHT GIVE ME REASONS TO KILL YOU AND GUESS WHAT?"

"You'll kill me?"

"NO, I'LL KILL YOU DEAD"