#and i have a fucking exit plan i have insane privilege to have a relatively easy out that i am now going to take

[mistergoddess]

yeah so the most valuable thing i've been clinging to rn is the advice of like. someone saying yknow when the aids pandemic was at its peak, the activists would tend to the sick and protest all day, and go out and dance and party all night. so you need that to keep going. and someone else saying when you're grieving sometimes you need to just get really drunk one time and forget everything for a night and let your brain have a break. but i think, its probably better to do that around people for sure. drinking 3 hard kombuchas alone in ur room while watching youtube just makes you cry your fucking eyes out and need a cigarette.