#and i ended up having to unfollow her even though i dearly loved her and she unfollowed me too
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lmao
#throwback to that time when i had a close friend on here that was so much like me in every aspect imaginable but 10 years younger#and i ended up having to unfollow her even though i dearly loved her and she unfollowed me too#she was insanely suicidal which. well. yeah#and i dont think she could actually see herself becoming someone like me 10 years down the line and it gave her a lot of grief#to exist in my vicinity#and we both knew we were pretty much identical even in the very specific way we both felt so lonely in our experiences#and in how antagonistic towards and alienated from common human interactions we were#and i think that the only difference between us was that at 20 i couldn't imagine in a million years to end up where i am right now#but i could absolutely imagine changing drastically. changing is second nature to me i'm a whole entire new bucket of feral farts everyday#so whatever happened i knew for a fact that i'd change. a lot.#and she couldn't imagine herself changing at all. so.#i do miss her immensely; she had incredible taste in music.#but i couldn't handle her suicidal nature. sometimes you make so much progress that you just can't look back#even though you have a world of sympathy for the other person
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GET TO KNOW ME TAG GAME
Before I start I would just like to say (tw alcohol for now and question 19) sorry for any spelling mistakes or if I ramble a little. To cut a long fuckin story short I mis read the measurements of my shot glasses and so instead of having two cocktails I’ve had the equivalent of four in the space of an hour and a half. Being british, im not gonna let a good drink go to waste either so im onto my third/sixth now.
Tagged by @clints-lucky-arrow (an actual goddess among us mortals)
1. Why did you choose your URL?
So this reason is two-fold. One, I didn’t watch star wars growing up because I was dumb and didn’t understand the politics (it wasn’t until my boyfriend sat me down and explained it literally in January of this year that I actually got it) but I loved Sci-fi and space so the next best thing was Treasure Planet (2003 film, Available on didney+) My favourite scene is the ending when Long John Silver (spoilers) is about leave before he can be arrested and Jim confronts him. Seeing how much his character has grown, Silver says to Jim, “Look at you, glowing like a silver fire. You’re something special, Jim. You’re gonna rattle the stars, you are.” It literally makes me tear up every single time I watch it and its one of my favourite lines of all time. Second, this was actually quoted in one of my favourite book series ‘Throne of glass’ by Sarah J Maas. I adore the character of Celeana and again one of my favourite quotes from TOG is when Queen Elena says to Celeana“ You could rattle the stars. You could do anything, if only you dared.” Every time I read that line I literally get chills and I actually have plans to get this tattooed on me lmao
2. Any side blogs?
Yes my fanfic blog @second-stars-totheright (I like puns and I used to love peter pan)
3. How long have you been on tumblr?
I joined when I was 13 for the fanfiction and lurked for a very long time, just reblogging and liking things until I deleted it when I was 17. Re downloaded the app and got my account back back around February of this year (when I was 19, now 20) and since then I’ve found it much friendlier and actually interacted with people this time around, and actually started posting my work on here!
4. Do you have a queueue tag?
No. This is my general postings blog so I just kind of stick anything funny or worth keeping here, but I probably should make one!
5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?
As I said to read fanfiction (anyone wondering it was 5 seconds of summer fanfiction. Anyone who judges me in the comments its fair game 🥺) but I re-downloaded it this year because I noticed with my work on Wattpad, while I had some do really well (one has gotten 130k+ views) its very difficult to actually interact with readers and get feedback. I’ve only accumulated that high of a number after 5 years of it being on there, and so tumblr is just so much more personal!
6. Why did you choose your icon/pfp?
I did it this morning as I was getting tagged in this lmao. I wanted a cartoon girl who looked like me but because I had a specific colouring (ie my hair is black with a blonde streak at the front & my eyes have both blue and green segments because I have heterochromia) I couldn’t find any that looked like me so I recoloured a cartoon girl I found on pinterest.
7. Why did you choose you header?
The white clouds fit the stars theme and it looks pretty with the purple. ✨💜
8. Whats your post with the most notes?
“That girl is a problem | Javier Pena x Agent!Reader part 1” with 105 notes on my fanfic blog.
9. How many mutuals do you have?
I am still a little tumblr idiot when it comes to this so if someone could tell me how to find out I'll edit this
10. How many followers do you have?
72 on here, 107 on my fanfic blog (AND I LOVE ALL OF YOU ACROSS BOTH OF THEM MWAH, MWAH KISSES FOR YOU ALL 💜💜💜)
11. How many people do you follow?
165 (it was 700+ but the other day I unfollowed a bunch of accounts that haven’t been active since I followed them when I was 13. There were LOTS)
12. Have you ever made a shit post?
I mean all you have to do is look at the Nomad memes I make (UNAPOLOGETICALLY I might add 😤) for @clints-lucky-arrow to know I absolutely have. That series has a hold over me im telling you. I black out when I start reading and I awake with a bunch of meme editing apps open and my feelings tugged at from her amazing writing.
13. How often do you use Tumblr each day?
If I’m with my boyfriend which is like two days a week, rarely, but now I’ve finished uni, I’m on here all the god damn time. I feel so comfy and safe interacting with you all, not to mention some of you guys are funny as hell.
14. Did you have a fight with a blog once?
Not really on here, I haven’t received any hate luckily but I prefer not to spoil how comfy I am here with arguing.
15. How do you feel about ‘you need to re-blog this’ posts?
I’m a little confused by this I dunno whether I’ve just never come across any like this or if Stars is being a bimbo on the tl again. However, I only reblog things I’d like to keep for future reference or if something deserves to be shared to everyone else like a fic rec or a piece of art. (As Mack said, I’ve re-blogged so many in the past promising me money or luck and I am still broke as shit so what does that tell you).
16. Do you like tag games?
Yes!! I love reading everyone elses and getting to know my mutals better!
17. Do you like ask games?
Again yesss because it means I get to send love to my mutuals and get to know them better! I tend to not participate though just read their responses because I sometimes feel like I’m bugging people clogging their inboxes even though I know that’s the point idk I’m a hell of an over thinker sometimes 🥳
18. Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?
It’s been said before but @clints-lucky-arrow (wow you rlly owning this post bby girl) but I just remember lurking on Nomad early February and liking and reblogging her chapters so I could keep them to re-read cause that’s how much I instantly loved it and when she followed me I realised who she was and lowkey had a starstruck moment bcus id been ciaght up in her work for weeks and too nervous to make contact. Also @arduadastra, I saw her work all over the pedro tags for so long and now I’ve gotten to know her she is the sweetest girl!! We usually fan over Javier Pena gifs together, she’s solely responsible for ‘That girl is a problem’ bcus of her gif sending at 1am giving me Javi thots and now it’s my most successful one on my blog. And most recently @pedrosgirlx followed me this morning and her work is genuinely some of the best I've seen on here, as I said this morning it is the Sistine Chapel ceiling of Mando art it is actually jaw dropping!! I cant believe all these creators are rlly giving us this content for free and yet being so talented AND the nicest people I’ve ever met!!
19. Do you have a crush on a mutual?
No, although I hold a lot of them dearly as friends. 15/10 would treat you lovelies to a drink of your choice if we ever met (any of you from the uk who drink I’d get you a pitcher from Whetherspoons)
20. Absolutely no pressure tags:
anyone who wants to join! a lot of people I would have tagged have already posted theirs so go for it if you like the look of it!
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You Have Been Lied To #4
hello again!
in the first few posts we have talked about
how the public narrative is carefully constructed by a global elite
how our entire perception of our past and how we came to be was shaped throughout history
how the myths and stories about a great flood and giants throughout all the cultures are real
how there are children going missing in massive amounts
and why they are going missing 1 & 2
while i am not at all hurt on a personal level by the fact that many people start to unfollow me - i really don't care for status, fame, pleasure, distraction, an online-reputation, or ANYTHING at all anymore -, i am really saddened that only a fragment of people care for the Truth. the only thing i can do is keep going and pray that people will wake up in time. many others have begun to wake up (a lot of people woke up because of the Qanon movement but i am not a Qanon).
in this post today, i'm going to shed light on what Nazi-Germany actually was. i personally didn't dig deep into my own research because i am entirely overloaded with all kinds of researches and Hitler is not really my favourite topic in the world. but i've read a great book that pulls from many well-researched sources, plus i am using my common sense. when you can count 2+2 together and it makes sense, you know that ist is the Truth. the 2+2 we are going to look at today is the following:
- we've learned that the mainstream media and the entertainment media serves mainly two agendas: 1. to keep the truth away from us, and 2. to shape our perception of WHAT is possible, what is fantasy, what is truth and what is just too crazy to be real. right?
so, according to this parameter, let me ask you the question: why do you think there are SO MANY movies and works about the Nazis being deep into occult knowledge and into mystical artifacts? Captain America: Civil War, Hellboy, Wolfenstein, the Indiana Jones series, Iron Sky, The Keep, and many others are part of this concealing of Truth. the reason why Hollywood wants us to believe that this thought is too fantastical and too absurd to be real is that the Nazis truly had religious interest in the occult.
here is a brief overview about the topic
there are quotes by Hitler himself which make one think what the heck did he mean by that...? (looking at it from a public narrative perspective ofc)
according to what i've learned Hitler was a huge follower of the teachings of Madam Helena Blavatsky - who founded Theosophy, basically the doctrine where the New Age movement gets pretty much all its ideas, and on which all the secret societies are founded: the Knights Templar, Golden Dawn, Freemasons, Rosicrucians, Ordo Templi Orientis, Illuminati and many more.
this image alone speaks volumes once you realize what’s being communicated.
the Lemurians? the Atlanteans? THE ARYANS? after breaking the veil of deception that is around all of us, it couldn't be more obvious that Hitler was deep in the occult knowledge that was brought forth by Theosophy in 1875. it simply does not make sense at all that Hitlers only goal was to create a race that "has blonde hair and blue eyes" (though it plays a tiny role in this as well). Hitler truly believed with all his rotten heart that there is a race that is superior to regular humans. this religious belief burned in him and his Nazis like an insane fire and they went on a lot of expeditions around the world to find more occult knowledge and also a very specific thing which i am not mentioning yet.
there are a ton of actual real photos of Hitler and his Nazis in Tibet visiting the monks, and also Hitler in the Antarctica (which is a whole rabbit hole for itself but that one is really crazy *lol*) and whatever you've heard in the public why Hitler went to these places, it is not the Truth.
when i was still in this witchy community on here, i often saw posts that basically told Nazis to f*ck off and stop using Runes. back then i had no concept of why any Nazi would use the nordic runes except maybe the superficial thought of "Germans are germanics are nordics" or whatever *lol*, the Truth is, in Hitlers quest to unlock as much as occult knowledge as possible, he also visited Iceland and studied the Nordic Edda. [ Hitlers goddaughter was also named Edda, just throwing this in here ] - Guido von List (an Austrian living in Germany) was apparently the first one to assign mystical meanings to the nordic runes and founding an occult Religion named Wotanism, he died in 1919.
another thing i want to point out is the Swastika. you probably know that the Swastika is pretty much an ancient symbol and appears in ALL kinds of cultures of this world. there is a reason for this that goes deep beyond any regular comprehension, but the public narrative is that Hitler simply stole this symbol and made it a Nazi-Germany symbol, but the truth goes much, much, much deeper than that.
of course we can pretend like all of these connections are just "coincidences" and of course we can cling to the public narrative that is telling us lies, lies, lies. i dearly encourage everyone who wants to know the Truth about this world to start researching. in all of the previous posts i've mentioned and linked really good starting points. you don't have to be a Christian or believe in Jesus in order to find out about the world we live in (though, after discovering all of the pieces and puzzling them together, the most logical thought for me was to literally RUN towards Jesus and i know this is different for everybody but i am praying for you to find Him). i know a lot of this sounds crazy and flat-out foil-hat-kind of way. but always remember that this image of the Truth is on purpose. people who dig into the Truth get out-cast, people who discover the Truth and want to wake other people up are being labelled as wrong and crazy, get silenced, get threatened, get assassinated.
to say it in Hitlers very words: "Truth is not what is; Truth is what people believe it to be" .... sadly, that is very true in our society today. everyone just picks and chooses what they want to believe and there is no concept anymore of ultimate Truth because we are being lied to from each and every side. and i know this sounds radical and Noony how can you say something like this, and so on and so forth, i really GET IT. i understand that it sounds radical, i understand that it isn't what people WANT to hear. you can condemn me all that you want, i really do not care anymore, this is way too important than setting my own comfort above it. Truth is truth, and lies are lies.
one of my favourite scriptures in the Bible is "And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free." --- John 8:32 ... it could NOT be MORE accurate. it's actually mindblowing how relevant and true these thousand year old words are, especially today. i've never felt so light and free and happy and sane EVER before in my entire life. i've quit my psychopharmacy drugs a while ago (i've been taking prescription drugs for more than 10 years) and my life is looking just bright and wonderful right now, and this even though i almost died in April, still recovering from it. i am more courageous, more filled with love, more motivated, more friendly, more calm, my household is doing just fine, everything is clean and neat, i am doing my chores, my plants are thriving, and even though i am literally ALONE 24/7 (real life AND online) i never ever feel lonely. and i am living with wide open eyes and even though this world is HORRIBLE, i am peaceful now. the Truth really DOES make you free. i've stopped with all kinds of toxic things, from sugar to drugs, you name it. i don't crave neither stimulation nor attention anymore. it's incredible. i can only recommend it. what God and his prophets also foretold over 2000 years ago that it would be EXACTLY like this. "evil will be considered good, and good will be considered evil" - people who speak the truth and do the good deeds will be demonized by the masses.
doing witchcraft and magic and believing in the New Age NEVER felt evil because i was never harming anyone. and i am pretty sure that 99,5% of you people on here feel the exact same way. we are being conditioned by the entertainment media to believe that magic is wonderful, innocent and curious. Disney is doing a GREAT job easing little children into the concepts of magic and fantasy. and i know most of all people never harm anyone with their magic. and God didn't forbid us to do magic because he doesn't want us to have fun or to have a spiritual life, or because he thinks we don't deserve any of the things we can do for ourselves magically. God will HAPPILY provide each and every need of us. the reason why God forbid his people to practice magic, sorcery, divination and witchcraft is to protect us from being deceived. now, a lot of people will rebel mentally, and that's okay, i was the same way. before you haven't discovered the truth and combined all of the puzzle pieces, it really just doesn't make a lot of sense, is really provoking and sounds bad. i was really wrestling with all this myself. now, i am grateful to the Lord that this wrestling process ended up in me being OPEN to what He has to say, and discovering the Truth instead of rebelling and living a lie any further. Praise God for not giving up on me with my stubbornness.
today, i've listened to an interview with the Illuminati Defector that i've mentioned in an earlier post, who was going to be one of the highest ranks in the Illuminati (Queen Mother of Darkness). her name is Jessie Czebotar and she has made it her mission to bring light to this worldwide matter and help survivors being rescued. please listen to some of her interviews, it’s mind-blowing what she has to say.
honestly, when you realize how EVIL these people are and that they ARE witches and druids and that they USE the occult and witchcraft and magic on an EXTREMELY high and incredible level, the LAST thing you WANT is to continue doing the same thing. like. i am not judging anyone here, truly. because we simply do not know what's going on. but when you suddenly realize that EVIL PEOPLE like Hitler, like the Illuminati and the Freemasons and all of these secret occult societies did and ARE doing the same thing of which WE regular people think it's no big deal and it's okay, you simply wanna run, run, run from it as far as you possibly can. at least this is how i feel about it. i am not forcing anyone to believe me, i am simply encouraging you to at least find out why i am saying all these things to you, and then decide for yourself.
Jesus said that we will know them by their fruits. a good tree can only create good fruit and a bad tree can only create bad fruit. a good tree can not create bad fruit and a bad tree can not create good fruit. it's really quite simple.
God bless the ones that read this with an open mind.
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[ Okay y’all, I think it’s about time I got a few things off my chest and onto the dash. This isn’t anything personal, nor directed at any one person. Just my feelings about my dash and how things have been going the last few months for me. There’s some important info under the cut, but I’ll try to summarize at the end for a tldr for those in a hurry.
First off, admittedly, muse has been hard to come by lately. I’m sure a lot of you have noticed that I’ve slowed down a lot in activity. Life has been a lot busier than I’m used to due to my summer job (aka raising five orphan calves). It’s been a far cry more of a juggling act than having only one last year, and it’s honestly made keeping up muse hard due to it being very time-consuming and tiring. Add in that it’s the pits of Summer, and my room where my desktop is regularly reaches 90+ degrees Fahrenheit for several hours a day, and that leaves very little energy/mojo for sitting in the heat and trying to write when I’m tired. The last straw is that my mental health has been in a fairly steep decline lately (none of which I can afford to treat). Put those factors together, and you have a very drained individual who is all the more depressed because her one outlet is less enjoyable due to those very factors.
I’ve been trying to get back into things: revamping my blog design, new icons, even new blogs! And though I want to be doing these things, I still lack the energy for them for the above-mentioned reasons. My drafts and ask replies are still slow, and I feel bad for making everyone wait. True, this is a hobby, but one I love dearly. I don’t like to disappoint those who help make it fun for me.
So, to try and make up for my lack of activity, I’ve done my best to make a regular habit of having inbox calls! All it takes is a like, and I’ll hop into your inbox and give you an ask to reply to from whatever muse I’ve got inspiration for. Seems simple enough, and all of the regulars have been using them frequently, which I’m glad for!
But admittedly, I’ve gotten a bit...frustrated lately. A few months ago I started making a point of clearing out inactive blogs of 4+ months. And even with that in place, I still follow over 160 blogs, probably which 95% are RP blogs that I’m mutuals with. And yet my efforts to reach out and interact are only met by the same five or so people, with the occasional rare exception.
No one is obligated to interact, of course. I’m not begging for that. What I am trying to convey is that I’m reaching a point where it seems largely pointless to be following 90% of the blogs I follow. Admittedly, I don’t read others’ posts hardly at all unless they’re meant for me. I just don’t have the time, and I often lack context to make them as enjoyable for me to read as they do for those they’re intended for. And while I understand people do so themselves, and sometimes follow blogs just for reading their writing - without intent to interact - I guess I’ve just reached a point where I don’t see much reason to follow many of the blogs I follow. There’s no interaction despite me both reblogging memes, and having open calls.
Like...forgive me for sounding short, but all it takes is a simple click from a blog on my open posts, and I’ll bring the ask to them. It takes literally a moment. And while I, with abundant social anxiety, understand that sometimes that’s too much, there’s not much else I can do besides just doing things of my own volition. Which, again, given my lack of energy and time, I just...can’t do. Especially not for as many blogs as I follow.
So, what’s my point? My point is, I’m considering a sizable purge of those I follow. Mainly those I’ve never interacted with despite having been mutuals for a good share of time. Maybe even those who very rarely interact. Because at this point, I have so little energy to be here properly, I don’t want to squander it on those who won’t reciprocate. Which may sound harsh, but this is a hobby. And if I’m to enjoy it, I have to do it in a way that lets me get the most out of it.
This, I suppose, is a heads up that in the coming days, when I have time to sit and do it, I’m likely going to go through my following list and unfollow a great share of people. It won’t be personal. It’ll just be because interaction - the reason I follow people back - just isn’t happening, and there’s not much point for you to be on my dash. You are, of course, in no way expected to keep following if you’re among those I unfollow - I know many people only like to follow mutuals. That’s how I operate, after all. So if I unfollow, feel free to do the same.
If you’re someone who follows just to read my stuff, good on you! Keep on following - I appreciate you, even if we don’t interact. But given that I don’t read things that aren’t intended for me, there’s just not much purpose in me following you back. If I’m to be mutuals with someone, then it’s because I want to write with you. And I want you to want to write with me. Given that my numerous open posts over the last several weeks have only been taken by a regular group of people, then...I see no point in extending my dash beyond those who make the effort.
I know this might sound harsh, but I’m tired of having so much...emptiness in this hobby. I only really have time and energy for what directly involves me and my muses. Which might sound a bit self-centered, but that’s how it is. I know you’re all wonderful writers. And I’m not booting you off my dash because I don’t like you, or your writing. I just want to condense things to what I personally want to see. And for me, that means what involves me, and the people who have taken the time to bond with me and my muses. So again, it’s nothing personal - I just have to clear my dash and following a bit.
IF we’ve yet to interact and you’d like to start something before I go through my list, PLEASE just let me know. I promise I’m a very approachable person. But I can only make opens so many times and have them be ignored before I get tired of trying. Hence doing a little cleaning house, so I can enjoy this hobby a bit more. Thank you all for your understanding <3
TL;DR - I’m going to clear my following of people who aren’t interacting with us, because limited time/energy mean wanting to condense my dash and following pool. Feel free to also unfollow, but I won’t softblock just in case you'd like to remain following. This probably won’t happen for a day or two, so feel free to talk to me OOC before then if you’d like to discuss anything. But it’s personally time for me to clear out those who aren’t meeting my offers for interaction so my dash is filled more with those who are willing/able to write with us. Thanks to everyone who’s followed regardless - y’all are great <3 ]
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