#and i didn't realise how constant it was until today that im back home
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i'm gonna go fully insane every few minutes or so i get an urge to go pet and kiss my dog and then there's nothing to do with my hands and i don't know what to do with myself
#the thing is that.. before#everytime i grieved it wasn't so. focused on the physical i guess#im not a very physically affectionate person#with other people i mean#i used to miss stuff like talking to someone watching a movie together laughing with them etc#with my dog it was always me petting her or her sitting on my lap or me picking her up or kissing her head#and i didn't realise how constant it was until today that im back home#and know she should be here#like i am actually gonna go crazy theres some strange feeling in my hands bc i want to hold her head#and talk to her while shes looking at me#or pet her or scratch her ears or kiss her head#god#dog blogging
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If It is okay to ask, how to tell when a kid is adhd or just being a kid? Looking back I can see a few signs like constant daydreaming, restlesness fidgeting etc but that wasnt much different from the other kids. As a teenager it became more clear I think because most of girls my age were not behaving like tomboys anymore and the symptoms mentioned above did not go away plus i think I had/have rsd. But only now as an adult i feel like these things are actually getting on the way. I daydream a lot, the restfulness didn't go anywhere, rsd still anoying as fuck (i think this is related with being a people pleaser? I got that too) and i notice more and more this horrible thing you usually call executive dysfunction. I cant really get a diagnosis and while I relate to a lot of symptoms and posts adhd people share, I'm really scared Im just procrastinating and trying to use adhd as an excuse for not getting things done. And I feel really bad about that. So back to my original question, if the signs were there since childhood but did not trouble me until like 4 years ago, how can i tell If It was adhd or Just kid stuff?
i mean the fact it didn't go away is a pretty good tell, honestly.
redmore to save the dash
as an adhd kid you may, with other children
-had difficulty making/keeping friends or socialising and felt "weird" or "different"
-were not invited to parties, made excuses to not go, or acted inapproptiately when there (and were never invited back)
-easily gave in to peer pressure from a desire to "fit in"
-were probably called "gullible"
-found it difficult to "wait your turn" in any activity
-frequently picked last for games and team sports
-found it difficult to "share" things with others
-caused fights/arguments with siblings/other children over trivial things
-may have been called "spiteful" or "vindictive"
-not realised when you were "taking things too far" with joke or play
-tried to annoy people on purpose
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as an ADHD child in school you may
-consistently not done school/homework until the last minute. not by choice, but because you could never seem to "just get started on it" until it was immediately pressing
-not known where to start with longer-term projects / never really "got" how to study or revise for exams. could not organise notes.
-made careless mistakes in schoolwork
-had report cards littered with "intelligent but could try harder" "needs to apply themselves" "has potential but lazy" etc
-parents/teachers said you had an "attitude" / you had a tendency to "talk back"
-often seemed to forget things you had already learned until you were reminded of them, or had difficultly linking knowledge together
-doodled a lot in class, and found doing so made it easier to listen
-easily distracted by external stimuli ie things happening outside the classroom window, or a conversation in the next room
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as an ADHD child at home you may
-had trouble getting up in the mornings (your parents had trouble dragging you up, and you felt groggy/sleepy "just 5 more minutes")
-had issues going to bed. did not seem "tired" at bedtime. stayed up late reading frequently. refused to get ready for bed.
-always been rushed to get ready for things
-being forgetful or "a ditz"
-being called "lazy"
-forgetful with daily activities such as brushing your teeth and would need to be reminded
-found it hard if not impossible to keep your room clean and organised. not "knowing where to start" with it
-walking past things without seeing them. eg my parents would leave my laundry on the stairs to take up and then berate me because "you've walked past it six times today". not really seeing mess in general bc it became "background noise"
-not following through on instructions/not finishing what you were asked to do. like doing half of the dishes
-you were over-sensitive to criticism
-would often lie to get out of obligations, maybe even compulsively (ie you couldn't help it)
-you answer to "why did you do/say x" or "why didnt you do x" was frequently "i don't know" and you genuinely didn't know
-liked to do things the same way every time and got upset if the structure or plan changed
-would become frustrated if your demands were not immediately met. could not "wait until later"
-somebody would ask you to do something and you wouldn't do it for several hours, without realising it had been that long
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as an ADHD child in your leisure time / emotionans you may
-people saying "are you even listening to me?" a lot
-talking excessively, being "a chatterbox"
-despite being a "chatterbox" around familiar people, you were very shy/withdrawn around others. your two modes are "verbal diarrhea" and "mute"
-answering questions before the person even finished asking, interrupting others a lot
-you had a lot of interests but didn't keep up with any of them for very long
-were "emotional" or "overdramatic" ie crying or getting angry easily
-identified as a "perfectionist" and would either hyperfocus on unimportant details, or gave up on new pursuits you were not "immediately good" at
-people said you have a "selective memory" because you can eg name all 151 pokemon in order but not remember to pick up milk on the way home
-your moods seemed to change quickly and drastically
-had difficulty "behaving yourself" in public ie when out shopping
-broke/smashed things when angry
-got injured by doing reckless/stupid things
-complained of "being bored" often
-watched TV or played video games excessively and could lose hours at a time without noticing
#all of this obv in addition to the general#daydreaming/fidgeting/inabiliy to sit still/excess physical energy#you can look up child ADHD rating scales#that would have been completed by a parent or teacher#and look back and score yourself
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Eleventh Day of Twelve - A Tired but Treasured Day
A/N - Look at that! We are second from the end! Thank you to all the comments and love! Really appreciate it, it's been a long week!
. . . .
Read previous drabbles below.
. . . .
You walked into the office clinging to your cup of coffee. It felt like you were just here and you were, only five hours ago. This time however it was your own doing. You'd found a tiny shred of evidence to go on and had to follow it before the trail went cold. Then it lead to Gibbs and Nick finding the killer in a warehouse in town and bringing him in at just after 0100. You didn't finish interrogating until 0200 and it was now 0730. Coffee, coffee needed to be pumped into you to wake up this morning and a constant flow throughout the day would be required.
To your delight there was a hot cup sitting on your desk as you walked into the bullpen. No note so you assumed this time it wasn't from your gift giver. Day 11 and no one had spilled the beans or gone looking at the cameras like they wanted to on day one.
"Gibbs dropped it off about five minutes ago before he went down to get a report from Kasie who wasn't pleased to be called in so early." Ellie explained while leaning back in her chair and sipping her coffee. "He brought one for all of us."
"Christmas miracles do happen." Nick grinned, dropping his small cup in the trash. "Done."
"It's not a race. You just slugged all your energy for the next three hours."
"Oh please, I've stayed up later and come to work more tired before. Remember the November incident." He waved off.
"I still feel hungover from it." Ellie grumbled, scrunching her nose at the memory of Tequila.
"Please don't remind me." Tim groaned. "Plus I'm not allowed anymore Tequila, Delilah's orders."
"She may be on to something." You ran your hand through your hair, smirking at the banter. Turning on your computer for the day, you saw the next gift hanging from your desk lamp. It was beautiful, a little teddy bear carved out of marble with a shimmering purple and green crown sitting on its head.
"Day 11, the gift giver strikes again." You rolled your eyes at Nick's words while holding the Christmas decoration in your hand, running your thumb over the intricate detail.
It was sweet, a cute addition to your small Christmas tree at home. You'd put it up on December one. That was your tradition and some years it didn't seem worth it but you made the effort. Being alone on Christmas sucked, there was no way around it but this year you were making an effort to not sulk about it. The secret gift giver certainly lifted the spirit as well.
Your tree wasn't over the top but a nice addition to your home. This would fit perfectly front and centre and you made sure of it.
The day was relatively easy. The office banter keeping the spirits going with a good supply of caffeine. It was really just a lot of paper work and then you were set free around mid afternoon to try and have that weekend off. This time Vance made sure the team wouldn't be called in. There were other agents to take the call after all.
You'd missed Jack most of the day and didn't want to interrupt her as she was head deep in evals for the end of year. Instead you decided to shoot her a text when you got home.
- Just wanted to say have a good weekend. Didn't want to interrupt your head mojo.
You knew she'd get a kick out of it and you weren't mistaken.
- Head mojo hey? Smarty in the evening just like you said. Missed you today, didn't realise how many evals I still had to do before I went on my trip. Now I'm back logged and still at work.
It was just hitting 1830 which was a late one for Jack on a Friday. She was always hurrying along at the end of the week to make sure by the time 1700 hit she was out the door.
- I hope you are either finishing for the evening or planning on having dinner while you work. It's getting late, Jack.
- No need to worry about little old me. I need to get these done, I'll grab a bite later. Enjoy your night.
An idea popped to mind, you grabbed your coat and car keys and headed back out into the snowfall with your blue scarf still wrapped around your neck.
Thankfully, you weren't too far from the Navy yard and the Diner was just a five minute detour on the route. You called ahead so the food was ready when you got there and still warm when you knocked on her door.
"Come in, y/n."
You huffed, opening the door. "Now how could you possibly know it was me?"
Jack was sitting on her couch, shoes off, legs crossed and glasses tugging her hair back and sitting on her head. "You didn't reply, you always reply. And you care too much." She got up, placing her laptop on the coffee table and walking up to you.
Those were a lot of compliments you weren't entirely prepared for. You thought Jack was the one that cared a lot, but never too much. "I think I care just the right amount but I can eat this all by myself if you'd prefer?" You smirked, pretending to walk back out but Jack caught your arm.
"I didn't mean it like that. I lo-ike that you care so much." She ran her hand up and down your arm a few times before dropping it away. Her warm comforting smile turned into a cute frown. "And don't you dare walk out on me now that youve made all this effort to come here." She took a deep breath in. "Is that two cheeseburgers and fries?"
The frown and the way her nose twitched at the smell was completely adorable. "With a side of gravy. Wasn't sure if you liked it on your fries or not." You shrugged, missing the soft and loving look Jack gave, you walked past her and sat at one end of the couch, unpacking the bag of food. "Come, sit." You urged, patting the spot beside you as she just stood there and watched.
With a soft smile curving her lips, she came around after a beat and sat exactly where you said to. She took the small pot of gravy and poured it over her fries before pouring the rest over yours. "Thank you."
You bumped her shoulder lightly. "Anytime. Can't have Jack Sloane Hangry and loose in DC." That got you a slap on the knee but it was worth it as her hand soothed the spot she hit and stayed there for a while until it was time to eat.
"Didn't mean to ruin your Friday night plans either." She took a huge bite of the burger.
Between bites you managed an answer, "You mean my big watching The Holiday movie while eating a cup of noodles or the one where I go to sleep at 7pm because im living on about four hours sleep right now."
Skipping over how tired you were she jumped at the mention of the movie. "That's my favourite Christmas movie! It's got the best of both worlds! The sun of LA and the cold winter wonderland of the UK. God, I haven't watched that in years! My mum and I went to the movies to watch it and then every Christmas after we'd watch it together, some people had Love Actually, we had The Holiday. Guess I stopped watching when mum passed." She ate a few more fries. "Wow, Jack, way to ruin the good mood. Sorry. Got lost for a moment there."
You liked it when she rambled. She always would say so many interesting things and you just loved to hear her voice. You prayed the day never came when you wouldn't hear it anymore. "Don't apologize-" You held up your hand to stop her from butting in. "- And, no it's not because of Gibbs silly rule. I enjoy hearing about your past about things you love or did. The Holiday is a sweet movie, my must watch in December along with The Grinch, Home Alone and many more. I try my best to keep the holiday spirits up when I'm by myself for them which has been the last many."
"I enjoy hearing you talk too." She smiled, taking a massive bite of her burger and filling up her cheeks.
There was no silence after that. The evals were put to the side and you talked for what seemed like hours. Talking about childhood Christmas' and silly stories to cringe worthy dating moments over this time of year. It wasn't until you couldn't keep your mouth shut from yawning that you said good night around 2300.
"Sorry you didn't get your evals done." You sing over the roof of your car as Jack unlocked her Mini.
"Don't be. I'm happy to come in tomorrow because tonight was fun!" Her genuine smile told you that she wasn't lying. You could read people pretty well and most times Jack Sloane was an enigma to you but right now you knew she was telling the truth.
"Good night, Jack."
She opened her car door before adding. "Enjoy your movie!"
You yawned with a laugh. "You're kidding right? I'm going to sleep, I'll watch it tomorrow now."
"Fair, good night y/n. Sweet Dreams!"
. . . .
Who doesn't want this to end? Me. But I also maybe, slightly want a break from writing every day. It's been fun but tiring. I've enjoyed it a lot though! I love this time of year, if only I wasn't working in retail.
#ncis#ncis christmas#ncis reader insert#ncis x reader#ncis 12 days of christmas#jack sloane#nick torres#ellie bishop#tim mcgee#jack sloane x reader
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