#and i did research about it and i think it was called a hemiplegic migraine
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but like i was fully cognitive the whole time i just got super dizzy and my vision was blurry and the right side of my body had like a light numbness/tingling sensation, but i was still walking and talking fine
#i had like a period of a year where this would happen to me and then it would go away and i would have a migraine#and i did research about it and i think it was called a hemiplegic migraine#but then they stopped and then i when i finally managed to visit a doctor and tell her about them she was like#when was the last one? almost a year ago? ok it doesn't matter. like??? 😭😭😭#i have a new doctor now but i never mentioned them cause like yeah it's been a few years since i had one#but now i know i have anemia and i know anemia is a common in stroke victims like bro i'm scared#but i. CANNOT AFFORD. TO GOT THE HOSPITAL#i don't even have all my rent for next month yet dude#why is being alive so suckkk#kyra's ramblings
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yellow it's too late for me to be writing this again (I'm practically asleep) but I have thoughts I need to get out of my brain so I can properly close my eyes.
today was so intensely emotional for me. I was incredibly anxious for my neuro appointment and they were running late but I thought my starleaf app was broken lol
then afterwards I was so raging mad, I was ready to take the firstborn child of anyone who looked at me wrong. not bc of my neuro, but bc of everything else going on. I rescheduled my examone home blood draw for the HEDGE study and the woman was...... awkwardly apologetic and it came off just as unprofessional? if that's possible? she was basically groveling and it was very off putting. just mumbling "sorry sorry sorry sorry" as I was trying to get off the phone with her. it freaked me out tbh lol
I mean, I did email the HEDGE study and complain and ask why they are using a company that is unprofessional and creates a lack of confidence in the research, soooooooo. maybe they really ripped them a new asshole.
then I called about my fucking medical bill for the second time and found out the guy I spoke to yesterday absolutely LIED TO ME about multiple things, including telling me my account already got sent to collections! he gave me the debt collectors name and number and everything! but the woman today said my account is still with them and hahahhaa I got her to get a supervisor bc I started questioning their business practices and called them shitty and her supervisor Kelly is now handling my account and will be taking care of everything apparently. I was told not to worry anymore after I yelled about how I'm on Medicare bc I'm on disability "so either way, you're not getting money from me!" lmao
so, being a bit of an asshole is working out awesome and I feel like a King Bitch advocate and everyone better watch out cuz I give no fucks okay bye
oh PS the neuro said I should be getting an EEG to rule out seizure activity (lots of feels about that) and otherwise it's possible my ghost arm was a hemiplegic migraine OR just a new awful aura for my usual migraine but that seems less likely bc it didnt feel like my normal migraines at all.
also yes I am still screaming on the inside and you would think I'm unmedicated bc of the dysregulation I'm displaying but IM ON SO MANY MEDICATIONS THAT SUPPRESS MY CNS AND ITS HONESTLY CONCERNING I STILL HAVE THIS MUCH RAGE lol
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